Work Text:
So they had decided to do Christmas this year, because at that precise moment there was no hunt going on or perhaps because after purgatory, Dean wanted to grab onto things tight and never let them go. Sam had agreed despite the ache in his heart for Amelia, how he wanted to see her right now on Christmas Eve, but what would he say? He wasn’t quite sure.
A rather shabby Christmas tree was put up with some cut price decorations and lights, but they were proud of it and since they had more than 24 hours to prepare there were actual Christmas presents under the tree that had not come from a gas station. Four presents in total, one for Dean, one for Sam and two for Castiel. Even if they were not entirely sure whether the angel was coming.
“Have you prayed to him?” Sam asked mixing some eggnog up in the kitchenette.
“Yeah, but I dunno, nothing, could be busy time for angels.” Dean replied gruffly, inwardly sending another prayer to the angel. He had been praying for days, even before they had decided to do Christmas. Dean just longed to see him so much it had been weeks since they had split at the day care centre with Mr Jones.
“I am sure he will come Dean, maybe he is just taking his time.” Sam said trying to smile and tasting the eggnog, wincing, “I think we need more rum in this..”
“On it,” Dean replied jumping up and grabbing his car keys, he wasn’t sure why he was feeling so nervous and jumpy. Perhaps it was because he wanted Cas to come so badly. As he drove to the nearest store he was starting to think that it might not have been a good idea having a Christmas. He loved Sam, but when he had thought of having a Christmas, it wasn’t what he had pictured. Yeah he had pictured the crappy motel, the cheesy decorations, the not so many presents and Sam with eggnog. But he had also pictured Cas being there too, perhaps with a bemused expression on his face as he tasted at the whole proceedings.
But he had prayed and there had been nothing, and now it was getting late on Christmas Eve and there had been nothing. What was Christmas if you couldn’t be with your family?
These thoughts were firmly in his head as he paid for the rum and some pumpkin pie at the gas station, he wasn’t really wanting to address the issue of why Cas not turning up for Christmas was bothering him so much. But then there it was, his inner thoughts screaming at him, why is it bothering you so much?
Well, it was Cas, the infuriating angel who had raised him from perdition, the angel who had sacrificed so much for him, the one who yes had betrayed him but also the angel who he had forgiven. The angel he had spent a year in Purgatory looking for, the angel he had tried so much to get back from Purgatory. His best friend, his only true real friend. The angel who had said he would kill himself if he returned to heaven to see what he had done, so Dean wanted to give him a reason to stay on Earth and damn well live, even if it was a badly planned Christmas.
Dean pulled over halfway back to the motel and got out of the car, angrily staring at the stars, “Cas!” he shouted, “Come on man! I keep on praying to you, I know you can hear me! Me and Sam, we want you to come for Christmas! We got a tree, eggnog and presents!”
He spun around in the dark on the side of the road, “I know in the scheme of things it’s not the biggest event and we aren’t really the biggest believers of Christmas, but we believe in family and you…you are family man! Least you could do is say you aren’t going to come!”
He sighed and looked down at his feet, “I miss you man, I really do and I just wanted to see you at Christmas, well because…Christmas you are meant to be with the people who mean most to you…you know…the people…you..”
He wasn’t going to say it, he couldn’t, he may have come to terms with it deep down with him, he couldn’t say it out loud, not yet. Dean swallowed, feeling his voice raw and watching his breath evaporate, there was still nothing around him, no swoosh of angel wings, nothing, “Figures,” Dean sighed and got back into his car.
He drove back to the motel, angrily slamming doors and kicking the stones on the pavement, now not really giving a shit about a Christmas as he charged through the door and ready to slam it to kingdom come when he saw that Sam was not alone in front of the Christmas tree.
“Hey! You get the rum or is that a over-reaction to the fact there was none?” Sam asked his eyebrows raised, “Look who has arrived.”
Dean stared as the trench coat wearing figure turned from the Christmas tree, “Hello Dean,” Castiel said softly.
Dean tried to ignore the leap of joy he felt in his gut, “Hey Cas, took your time!” he smiled throwing the shopping on the table, “Didn’t think you would make it,”
“Sorry I am late, I had to get your presents,” Castiel replied, spreading his hands to the presents that were on the coffee table, “I didn’t mean to be so late, but it’s nearly Christmas.”
Dean looked to the clock, it was gone ten pm, “You arrived just in time, we are just about to perfect the eggnog.”
They had drank and laughed at Castiel’s reaction to the drink, but by nearing Midnight they were all rather feeling relaxed and happy in each other’s company, watching Die Hard on the small tv screen with Dean almost adding Dolby surround sound by saying everyone one of Bruce Willis’ lines.
“Hey,” Sam said looking at his watch seeing it was 1am, “It’s Christmas!”
“Merry Christmas Sammy,” Dean smiled
“Merry Christmas Dean, Sam,” Castiel nodded a soft smile playing on his lips.
“You know what this means?” Dean asked, Castiel looked confused, “Presents,”Dean said excitably
Sam grinned at Castiel’s confused expression, “I thought it was customary to wait until morning,”
“Since when do we do anything customary and besides it is morning,” Dean replied pouring more eggnog in their glasses as Sam moved to get his presents under the tree, “Dean this is for you,” Sam said placing a present in front of him and one before Castiel.
While Castiel studiously and carefully opened his present, Dean took the Tasmanian devil technique of ripping the paper sending it everywhere. Sam had bought Dean a gorgeous set of knives with pearl hilts that matched his favourite gun, “Wow Sammy, thanks man, they are amazing!”
Castiel opened his present to find comically a Christmas tie and also a leather bounded diary, “I figured you would want to write down some of your experiences, or whatever you might be thinking, if you can’t speak to either of us but want to..you know..get it out…” Sam shrugged meeting Castiel’s eyes, who was shocked by the thoughtfulness of the gifts, “Thank you Sam,” he said nodding, taking the normal blue tie off, he started to put the Christmas tie on and paused looking puzzled then with a flutter of his hand the tie was perfectly tied.
Dean laughed at the flashing tie that was now around Castiel’s neck, “It’s great man! Really is! We must get a picture before it’s over!”
Castiel scowled slightly, then picked up his present for Sam, “This is for you Sam,” he proudly gave a fabric covered book, Sam pulled the book from the muslin and saw an old book, “It is the first edition of some very rare exorcisms and spells, I thought you might like it when I saw it in Jerusalem a long time ago.”
“It’s beautiful,” Sam gushed, “I love it! Thank’s Cas!”
Dean smiled and placed his present in front of his brother and turned to the angel to give him his, “This is for you Cas, Merry Christmas,” he said gruffly, placing a box in Castiel’s hand.
Castiel again opened it carefully and found on a silver chain a compass, “Erm I know you have been lost and feel like you have no direction,” Dean said lowly, “Er Like you have nowhere to go but here you go, here is direction, it’s got a spell on it that means no matter how lost or down and out, think of something you want or somewhere you want to go and it will give you direction..er or something like that…to keep..you er…from ever getting lost again..”
Castiel held the chain and compass in his hands, completely awed by the gift and the thought behind it, he looked to the hunters green eyes that were filled with such earnest feeling. Castiel felt his heart almost burst at the waves of emotion that flared through him, he placed the pendant over his neck, tucking the compass down under his shirt and felt the metal touch the space over his heart, “Thank you Dean,” he said hoarsely, “I like it very much.”
Dean nodded and turned to his brother but saw that he was not there, neither was the Christmas tree or the motel, the instant alarm of panic subsided when he felt Castiel was beside him, “What? Cas?!” he said exasperatedly. The angel moved on his feet sheepishly, “I am giving you your Christmas present,” he said softly and Dean realised where he was, the moonlight casting gorgeous silvery shadows on the canyon, not just any canyon, only the Grand Canyon.
“Wow…” Dean gasped softly, taking in the full view then he looked across to the angels face, staring at the way the moonlight touched his pale pink lips and made his blue eyes almost sparkle even more. Castiel smiled softly at Dean’s reaction then leant over and placed a soft kiss on Dean’s lips.
Shocked Dean felt his eyes close automatically as he kissed back, ok we are kissing him back…yeah we are actually…cos it’s kinda nice. But he still felt pretty surpised when the angel pulled back and Dean felt almost lost without those lips, “Ok…Cas…erm…was that part of the present?”
Castiel now didn’t seem as assured as he was before, a blush appeared on his cheeks that in the dark could still be seen “Yes Dean…I hope you didn’t think that I was being too presumpti-”
Dean interrupted the angel by grabbing the lapels of the angels trench coat and pulling him in for another kiss, when he felt the angel relax against him he let his arms drape around his shoulders feeling Cas sigh against his lips as his fingers tickled the angel’s hairline. Dean felt like his heart was going to beat out of his chest as he gently pressed soft little kisses against the angels chapped lips.
“So I wasn’t being presumptious,” Cas breathed against Dean’s lips.
“No,” Dean replied, letting his lips hover over Castiel’s he was surprised when felt Cas kiss him again, the angel wrapping his arms around Dean’s waist and pulling their bodies close. If Dean felt like his heart was going to beat out of his chest, it felt like it was going to explode with desire now as Dean let Cas kiss open his mouth and nibble on his bottom lip, gently slipping his tongue into Dean’s mouth. Dean had always wondered what Cas had learnt from the pizza delivery man and he was damned pleased he was finding out right now.
The pair broke off gasping for air and Dean opened his eyes to see the bright blue ones sparkle with desire, “And that was?” he said shakily, clinging to the angel to steady himself as his legs felt like jelly.
“Direction,” Cas replied, his eyes cast down his hand that hovered over the compass under his shirt.
Dean smiled, “Merry Christmas Cas.”
“Merry Christmas Dean.”