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“Don’t use violence. I’ll take out my inner core myself.”
The Great Demon, Zhu Yan watched as both Zhuo Yichen and Wen Xiao rushed toward him, each reaching out as he made his best attempt to seem as though he’d just removed his inner core and was succumbing to his inevitable death. As his eyes slipped shut, and his body met the cold ground, there was a commotion that swirled so loud around him that he couldn’t quite distinguish all the shouting and cries from each of his companions. Then, he felt a sudden disorientation that was followed by an almost serene silence.
The silence was broken by the sound of sobbing. The rock beneath Zhu Yan had become a cold floor. That was when he thought it was safe to open his eyes, just as a weight settled against his chest and the crying grew louder. Beyond a head of dark hair, he could see the kneeling form of Wen Xiao. Beside her, crouched both Pei Sijing and the Little Mountain God, who was still holding the talisman that had transported them away from any prying eyes or ears that could discover their deception.
It was Zhuo Yichen, the one person who hadn’t been apprised of the ruse, who lay heavily across Zu Yan’s “body” crying. The Great Demon couldn’t suppress a smile. How far had the two of them come together? And how sad would it be, the time of their true and final parting?
Wen Xiao was grinning demurely behind her lifted hand, and the other two, they were barely suppressing their laughter.
Zhu Yan didn’t have the heart to let this go on any longer. Honestly, how did the little demon think he was dead if his body wasn’t dissipating? Deceiving Zhuo Yichen couldn’t have been helped, but he didn’t have to let this continue. As gently as he could, he lifted a hand to Yichen’s back, smoothing it across his soft dark hair in what he hoped was a reassuring manner. “It’s okay,” he whispered. “I’m not dead.” He almost added, “yet” but that would’ve been too cruel.
Zhuo Yichen startled violently, sitting upright in a single quick move. Tears still falling, his expression changed to one of wonder just as quickly. “Zhao Yuanzhou! What?!?” He looked around him at the others, then back at the suddenly resurrected demon. “How?!? But your core!”
“Fake, that was all fake,” Zhu Yan said as he sat up, just in time to catch Zhuo Yichen’s hands as they balled into fists and came at him. His anger was manifesting almost exactly as Wen Xiao’s had before, which had Zhu Yan wondering if this was a conscious effort on Zhuo Yichen’s part to mimic her. Treating him the same as she had when he’d almost sacrificed himself for Yichen.
Not so easily holding Zhuo Yichen off, he spoke to the others. “Can we have a moment, please?”
It was Wen Xiao who blessedly ushered the rest of them up and out of the room.
“Stop.” Zhu Yan said in his most commanding voice, which of course lacked any true compelling power. He’d regretted making Zhuo Yichen immune to him twice now, and he guessed this wouldn’t be the last time. When that didn’t work to quell his flailing, he added a second word, “Stop, please.”
Maybe it was the fact that he was asking nicely that jolted Zhuo Yichen out of his fit of anger. The fledgling-demon stilled and looked into his eyes. Deeply. The much brighter blue color was actually quite fetching, if he had to admit. He could easily lose himself inside those eyes, Zhu Yan thought to himself. But there was no time for that. He cleared his throat and straightened a little more, releasing one of Zhuo Yichen’s arms. He patted his own chest with his hand. “Come here.”
Zhuo Yichen tilted his head, big and gleaming tears still spilling over. How he managed such perfect pearls of sorrow, Zhu Yan had no idea. “What?”
Instead of speaking again, he quickly pulled Zhuo Yichen into his embrace, feeling him struggle for a moment and then sag against him. Just as Wen Xiao had when he’d come out of the ice. Perhaps he shouldn’t treat them the same, they weren’t the same person, didn’t have the same experiences or desires. But they had something in common. Him. For some odd unbelievable reason, they both had given their hearts to him. A gift of devotion beyond imagining for the Great Demon, Zhu Yan. Such a gift was more than cherished by who he’d become—Zhao Yuanzhou.
The heart against his own beat as fast as a little bird. The arms that had come around him held him tightly. This level of grief was still a bit surprising and unexpected, especially from someone as seemingly composed as Zhuo Yichen.
Again, he found himself patting Zhuo Yichen’s back and murmuring reassurances to “Xiao Yichen,” he found himself saying, just as Wen Xiao called him.
After a short while, Zhu Yan heard a voice still thick with emotion whisper back. “You promised.”
He was glad that Zhuo Yichen couldn’t see him roll his eyes. What a child, this one, he thought to himself. “I actually didn’t break that promise. It was fake. We just didn’t have the ability or time to let you in on the act. We had to do this, to get the scale in exchange. Everything depends on that scale.”
Pulling away, Zhuo Yichen again graced him with that startlingly blue stare. Tears now starting to dry on his pale face. “To repair the Cloud Light Sword.”
“It has to be done,” was the only reply he could think of. But he realized a little too late that those words could also have the double meaning of his own death. His fate.Their fate.
“That sword–it’s that sword that can kill you.”
“I know.”
“The vision, what I saw. I can’t, I won’t do that.”
“Sometimes we have no choice but to do something we think we can’t.”
“That can’t be our fate.”
“If it is, I accept it. You should as well. I’ve lived so long, such an end…I don’t feel it’s a terrible one.”
Zhuo Yichen’s unfathomable eyes stared into his soul, and his reply couldn’t have sounded any more miserable. “I do.”
Words failed Zhu Yan. Words never failed him. What was happening? Were those eyes casting some spell? How could he not know what to say?
“What of Wen Xiao? Will you leave her too?” Zhuo Yichen asked.
“I will leave her in your care.”
“Bullshit! How can you leave her, Zhao Yuanzhou? How can you leave us? You said we’re a family!”
Perhaps it wasn’t the right thing to say, his reply. “Even families have to part ways.”
Zhuo Yichen dropped his gaze, shoulders sagging and hands braced against the floor. He looked so defeated. It pained Zhu Yan. It was an ache in his heart quite unlike anything he’d experienced before. At that moment he recalled Ying Long and Bing Yi, their conversation on the rocky shore of infinite darkness. The lifeless void that only Ying Long could illuminate.
“Ying Long said these words to Bing Yi back then, he said, ‘Just let me be the first star.’ Xiao Yichen, if I can be the star that keeps the darkness at bay—it is a worthy sacrifice.”
Not a sound nor movement came from the young demon before him, nothing to show he’d heard. He was as still as a statue.
“I told Wen Xiao that when I’m gone, I’ll be everywhere. I’ll be in the rain. For you as well—”
“I don’t want the rain, Zhao Yuanzhou!” Zhuo Yichen shouted, raising his head. “I want…I want…”
Zhu Yan shrank from the explosion of emotion coming from Zhuo Yichen that he could almost feel in his bones. For a moment, he thought there’d also be some violent outburst, odd though it might be if Zhuo Yichen was trying to not kill him. It didn’t come though.
Instead, Zhuo Yichen used that anger to propel himself off the floor and, rather gracefully in fluttering robes and streaming hair, leave the room.
Zhu Yan sat back, bracing his hands behind him on the floor. Just how had all this happened? Not one, but two people obsessed with saving him or at least with not letting him go. And Li Lun, his hatred was also a kind of deep betrayed love. How had they all come to gravitate around this white ape who had become infected with malevolent force? Who had done unspeakable things? He couldn’t fathom it himself.
In truth, he didn’t want to leave them—-any of them— behind. All he could do for now was take each step on the road that appeared ahead, make each choice hoping it was the best one. He would do everything in his power to make sure they were well and happy. And so, if stars and rain were all he could leave them with in the end, so be it. It had to be enough.
He smiled and stood, walking toward the door and his family waiting for him on the other side.