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Chapter Text

Asa would say she’s a pretty good dancer. Its probably the only thing she’s good at. 

Behind the curtains all the girls in the corps de ballet giggle and tease each other as they watch their seniors perform a variation. They wait to go out and dance together graceful smiles on their faces, the only place Asa doesn’t feel the wall between her and them. So what if they don’t like her. So what if they ignore her. They just don’t wanna put in as much effort in as Asa does. Thats why. Her mom is out in the crowd and she’ll be so proud that Asa earned a solo. 

Out on the stage Asa scans the room for her mother and crosses the stage gracefully in line with everyone else. Asa has a spot in the front and is clearly visible to the audience. In moments like these Asa can almost feel her heart burst as she recites each step like notes on a music sheet. Its the closest Asa ever feels to peace, its great. She is so focused on the music she doesn’t notice the wind bursting in through the doors. She doesn’t hear the shudder of the rain as loud as bullets against the walls. All she can see is one pointe shoe in front of the other (she just got en pointe a couple months ago and was promoted into a real dance company) when the roof comes off and her fellow dancers begin flying up into the sky. 

Asa’s mother climbs onto the stage in a panic and before Asa knows it they’re running through the streets. The expensive pointe shoes keep making her stumble through the street as the delicate costume they had saved for was destroyed by the wind and rain. 

The shoes begin to fall apart, and what Asa was praying didn’t happen all day happens. She falls at the worst possible moment over a dirty white cat and her mother dies throwing her back onto the right path. 

________

Theres a man at the door of the group home she is staying at. Its awkward. The man and the group home. Asa’s pretty sure the woman who owns the home is trying to kill Crambon, and none of the kids like her either. She’s quite a bit older than they are and been there quite a bit longer, so the kids will only talk to her so they can pet Crambon’s fluffy white coat. Its a cute cat, so Asa understands. Doesn’t mean she likes it. It does make her happy when the girls ask her to teach them a couple of ballet steps, watching them suck at it gives Asa a smile. Sometimes they make Crambon do it as well, pulling his paws many which ways and Asa has to rescue him. 

Its unsettling how similar waiting to be called to speak with the strange man is that waiting to go on stage is. He goes through each kid with a rough look on his face. The grip he has on their little hands is tight and the man has already made a couple of them cry. When he gets to Asa she can smell the alcohol on his breath.

“Any special skills?”

Asa shrugs “I can dance”

“She’s r-really good!” the little girl behind her stammers 

“Yeah!”

The man considers this and Asa has lasted longer than anyone else ahead of her in his line of questioning. 

“In the event of your coworkers at public safety dying what would your reaction be?”

Asa bites her cheek. This guy is so weird… “I dunno, I don’t think it’d be that upsetting,”

“Would you avenge them?”

“Probably not,” Asa just shrugged. She probably didn’t look that graceful now, she bet he didn’t even believe she was a good dancer. Even though, she really was good. Everyone said so. She would’ve been the principal dancer give it another year or so. If Asa coupd’ve still payed the registration costs. I mean her ballet teacher always taught-

“Which side are you on: humans or devils?” he interrupted her line of thought.

“Humans” she answered definitely 

The man scratched his beard in thought “⅔ ain’t bad…”

She waited for a response. 

And waited. 

While he thought, Asa looked at the little girl behind her and the little girl in front of her all watching Mr. Kishibe. She noticed the flask on his hip and the scars that littered his hairy hands. She thought he was a pretty big guy, well built but not smooth and lanky like the only other men she knew. Her father had been a dancer as well and was probably comparable to Mr. Kishibe in strength but was much lankier and more smooth in muscle. Mr. Mitaka had been the one to teach Asa many steps and variations before his death.

Finally Kishibe pulled Asa out of her thoughts once more by dragging her to the door. “Excuse me!?” She said “Where are we going?”

“Hm? I thought you knew this is a test for public safety training. That was your interview, you pass congratulations.” He said. Asa could tell he didn’t really care for her. She could also tell he was ready to grab her and get out of there. 

“I didn’t- I didn’t know that was the job I interviewed for!” That morning when the owner of the group home said a man would be looking for workers she willingly got in line. She had been under the impression they would be doing some manual labor…

Kishibe just looked at her. “I’ll be in the car. Get in in thirty minutes or I guess you can stay in this shit hole,” he took a drink from the flask and left. 

Asa blinked after him. Ultimately she joined him in the car with Crambon. On the long drive into Tokyo and eventually Public Safety HQ Kishibe explained to Asa how he would be training her for an experimental task force. Full of devils. Maybe she should’ve just stayed at the group home, gotten an apartment, and gone to high school. But what was the point in that now? All she had was herself. She didn’t even have a job or any friends. Maybe it was better to die early. 

Once they arrived, Kishibe explained how she couldn’t go back after making a contract. It was all down hill from here and she better get on or get out. She agreed. Nervously, awkwardly, her face was red and her heart was beating pretty quick but if this was something she could do with her life. Something other than waking up just to fall asleep again, it had to be better than how her life was currently going. 

He led her to the devil containment floors. 

“We actually have the Ballet devil down here,” He shrugged “Surprisingly strong,”

Asa nodded “The sport does have a lot of fears attached to it. The fear to perform or be good enough is tough with competitiion being pretty tight. There are many different anxieties dancers have such as the fear of injury or of their instructors. I know most of my ballet company lived in deep fear of variations such as Don Quixote’s Kitri Variation and difficult expectations like-”

“I don’t need the sermon.” 

Asa’s face heated up she mumbled out an apology when they arrived at the door. Kishibe quickly opened it up and threw her in. 

“Theres your first test!” he said

Inside was a studio, with large mirrors on each wall. Asa found herself in a leotard and tights, a pair of pointe shoes scuffed perfectly in front of her. In the corner of the room was an old dance teacher with bows in her hair and a frightening smile stare her down. 

“And what is your name child?”

Asa straightened and the pointe shoes magically wrapped themselves around her feet. They already hurt. 

“Asa Mitaka M’am,” she said, “I am here to make a contract with you,” and she felt compelled to curtsy in a way she never did before infont of the devil. 

The ballet devil smiled wider. 

“Miss Asa I make you the offer: you could be the best dancer in the world, and in a way summon a domain where you can dance your way through battle. Oh this is so exciting! Don’t you think so dear? Well, you shall dance and your steps will translate into attacks in reality. I just wish to have your feet.”

“My feet?” 

“Yes your feet,”

“They aren’t exactly very um… pretty?” so this devil had a foot fetish, Asa thought. 

“Yes thats the point, we can replace those easily,” 

“That’s all? Just this one time deal, you won’t take anything else?”

“Yes!” The old woman smiled hungrily. It made Asa nervous. “Sure, your new feet will feel as though they pierced knives with every step you take but when you are dancing it will seem as though you were possessed by the greatest dancers of all time.” 

Asa imagined herself on the stage as the principal dancer, the one the audience payed to see. Immediate perfection on every step she struggled with. Temptation poured into her soul as she considered the offer. She shook the devils hand, only a little disgusted with herself. 

She came out the other side wishing to never stand up again. As soon as she opened the door and stepped out she collapsed in agony. Her feet! She expected pain, but she didn’t expect the red satin tightly wrapped around her molded white foot. She could flex it in many different ways but what shocked her was porcelain like texture of the molded feet. 

Over the course of the next couple of weeks Asa lived in a spare room of Kishibe’s old traditional house. Each day she would wake up to a threat on her life. Each morning he sent her out to run for hours, and the first week she cried through the pain. Kishibe would make breakfast as he engaged her in a knife fight or took her out to a graveyard and forced her to clean graves as she avoided splashing her blood  on them. On her side of things the kitchen or graveyard would transform into a wide an open space. 

On the stage she performed a series of jetes  or a graceful arabesque  and the step would translate into an attack of some kind. With her arm a slash would go at him or a thrust of a sword. It was complicated and she did her best but couldn’t help but become increasingly frustrated against Kishibe. It felt like each variation only left her further from success. Kishibe easily dodged and attacked back, putting her off balance or even falling. 

“UGH can’t I just get you once!??” Asa cried out “You aren’t that tough!” She performed a series of clean perfect fouettes  that could have gotten her the role of the Black Swan in her near impossible 32 fouette  variation.  Each ‘slash’ against Kishibe was narowly dodged just to show he could relax against her. 

“Don’t speak” Kishibe casually said “Its better when your calm” 

She took a deep breath and instead performed a pique step that actually touched him! While not having done much harm the breakthrough performance had her stop solely in shock and happiness! If this were a classic ballet the celebration that would break out would last the entire act. 

 Out of exhaustion Asa gracefully fell to her knees. That was when Kishibe mimed killing her. Like he always did when they were done with these sessions. 

“Not bad,” Kishibe said, and was that a ghost of a smile on his lip?

“Thank you sensei” Asa let a smile grace her lips. 

“Tomorrow I’ll have you go on a mission. I would’ve put you on patrol first but this took priority.” He put his hand on her shoulder “You’ve done well, so don’t die” and he left her. 

Chapter Text

It was a long walk to the hotel Asa would be meeting her new coworkers at, so she got up at 4 am. Totally not way too early in the morning cause she couldn’t sleep the night before. Her uniform was made up of a black leotard, black wrap skirt and white tights. Over the leotard she wore a fitted collard shirt that she thought looked very professional. Asa was pretty darn cute. 

She considered hair clips, but took them out and stuffed them into her jacket pocket on the walk there. It was fine though, hopefully she could make a pretty good impression. 

Asa arrived early. 

VERY early. 

Making the quick decision to relax her feet, Asa sat at the steps of the building. Then considering the devil inside, she sat on the curb of the road instead. Himeno arrived after with two rookies behind her around 9 am, and hour after Asa got there. 

“Hey newbie!” Himeno waved from inside the car. “Wanna wait in here with us?”

Asa tried to smile ‘ if I make a good impression maybe she’ll like me’ the smile came out a little awkward. Inside the car alongside Himeno was a bigger guy obviously trying to act casual and a nervous girl that seemed anything but casual. Asa introduced herself before being interrupted by Himeno who gave her the brief. That was a little rude Asa thought. But she couldn’t let that bother her! Not before the two devils alongside Hayakawa Aki showed up. It was obvious Himeno thought highly of the man. Asa couldn’t imagine how he could keep fiends like that in line… it must have been a full time job. 

They arrived even later. Asa huffed, they were late. Finally when Aki arrived she kept to the side as they went through introductions. Aki seemed like a no nonsense experienced devil hunter Asa would have flinched at in her previous life. Now she hoped he held that in the line of duty. Next to him the two devils seemed like insane children. Asa considered their lives up to now. How long had they been alive? 

The boy messing around with an ax looked to be around her age, he couldn’t have been a real fiend since his head was totally normal. She wondered what his deal was, and why he smelled so bad. There was a little peanut butter on the side of his cheek she noticed. Still he seemed adept with that ax and she assumed he must have some experience. 

The real fiend frightened her. Power, she was told, was a relativly smart and refined devil. Asa hoped she wouldn’t have to meet any other fiends… Declaring herself the strongest there Asa tried to give the girl a wide berth. 

When it came down to her turn to introduce herself she stumbled over her words “Oh um.. I’m being trained- well I’m contracted with the ballet devil and Kishibe-sensei is training me as of now,” She nodded why did she nod? That was weird. She was sure Denji, the boy her age, was judging her. So was Himeno probably. Oh, was it rude to just introduce her name when she joined her in the car? Oh no…

“Heh so thats why your dressed all funny,” Denji said

“I’m not dressed funny!” Asa said, her cheeks heating up. 

“Yeah-huh”

“Nuh-uh” 

Aki interrupted “Don’t mess with people Denji, or your not getting gum”

“Eh? But you promised!” 

“If you behaved,”

“I am behaving!” 

Himeno stepped in leaning off Aki’s shoulder “You know, the best behaved here should get a reward for killing our devil. Perhaps a kiss on the cheek?” she smiled cheekily 

“No way!” Denji said, though he seemed a little tempted “Kissing is much better when you care about the other person,” 

“I agree,” Himeno said “What about a french kiss?” 

Denji’s face lit up bright red “I’ll get that devil!” he declared. 

Asa saw Himeno roll her eyes and smile out of the corner of her eye at Aki. Oh maybe they had something going on … she thought thats kind of cool. Very adult. Asa couldn’t really imagine herself looking at a man like that, did that make her childish? She guessed not going to high school was pretty childish… As these thoughts swam through Asa’s mind, the team headed inside the building and started going up. She took a deep breath, the kind she would take before stepping on stage and focused on what was in the area. Asa reminded herself of the training with Kishibe. This was her domain, they were all just stepping in it. 

As the climbed up to floor 9 small talk stemmed from their boredom. Asa was getting pretty tired of all this climbing too. “So whats your deal? Do you dance away the devils?” Denji asked. She thought he was making fun of her, but the earnestness in his voice made her think differently.

“Yeah I guess, I have never fought a devil before just Kishibe. I hope it won’t be much different,” 

Denji nodded as they passed the 8 again. “Thats cool”

“Thanks” Asa thought it would be polite to return the question but she didn’t exactly feel like talking. Her face was pretty red from talking about herself. She hoped Himeno and Aki thought she could be an asset. There was a part of her that feared if she took up too much space or made them uncomfortable they’d just throw her out the window. It was odd there weren’t really any windows in these hallways despite how they weren’t that deep into the hotel, She remembered every previous hotel she had been in to have some windows. 

Finally some ugly creature popped out from around the corner. Asa was almost relieved when she heard Kobeni’s loud shriek and the immediate action by Himeno gripping it with what was like an invisible hand. Power cut it in half. 

“Is that it!?” Power whined. 

“No way they’d send out a whole squad for this,” Himeno reassured the fiend. They passed it and headed on up the stairs. 

“Theres another one!” Kobeni frightenly exclaimed. 

“Its dead,” Aki stated. He turned around and Asa followed him, they came down the stairs to find themselves somehow above the group coming up. Thats weird Asa thought. They entered the rooms to find that the windows inside just lead to the room across the hall. If they tried to climb through the ceiling only to climb up through the floor and vice versa. They were trapped. 

Himeno assembled everyone “Alright, we have to assume the devil is somewhere in this space. The hard part is just finding it, easy! So lets break into teams and find as much rations as possible then look for the devil.” 

They broke up. By the time they explored as much of the hallway as they could the pile of food made up of candies, snack bars, popcorn, and chips looked like it might last the team a couple of days if they ate sparingly. Asa noticed the worst part was that there was no natural light coming through the windows so they couldn’t tell how much time could have passed. All the clocks were stuck at 8:08, for being stuck on the 8th floor. 

Asa had to be most worried about Crambon now. While, allowing the cat to live in his home, Asa wasn’t sure how far he’d go to take care of it while they were gone. It had probably been a day or so when Aki told everyone to get some rest. They gathered to divy up beds. Unsuccessful on finding any clue of the devil. 

“HA I CONQUER THIS FINE VESSEL OF SLEEP” Power declared hopping onto the bed.

 Denji looked at his options and joined her. Arai and Kobeni already buddied up so that left Asa as the odd man out. She considered if she should leave like HImeno and Aki…but who knows where they were. She thought she might’ve seen the glimmer of something in Himeno’ss eye before she could here him say he would continue to patrol. That seemed to be pretty boring and she didn’t wanna follow him so she found a couple extra pillows and blankets and climbed into a chair to get some rest. 

But rest never came to her. Almost as soon as she became settled a loud snoring could be heard across the room. Asa groaned. She imagined her warm, if small, room in Kishibe’s house. The soft and clean white sheets and quilted blanket she could cuddle Crambon under. She imagined the constant shadow of her vanity against the far wall. The vanity was something Kishibe had in storage. He took her shopping for new clothes, the whole time insisting he wasn’t to be thanked. That night Asa tried to make a good meal for him, in a kitchen almost solely filled with booze so it wasn’t easy. She wasn’t exactly sure if it turned out, but she tried right? 

When they went out he took her to the expensive places. The places she only went for a very serious purchase in her last life with her mother. A lot of the clothes she got were practical, leotards and  legging and a couple pairs of sweats. When Asa was paid for the first time she came back for some of the off-the-shoulder longsleeves she had seen her fellow dancers wear. She found a nice gym bag, and attempted to talk to a sales associate about the blue sweatshirt she had seen previously with a cute cake on it and C A K E written out in english letters. She stumbled over her words and said a weird thing, that she could tell made it uncomfortable. and rambled before the sales associate could figure out what she was talking about. 

That embarrassing interaction replayed in her mind practically all night. 

__________

Asa rolled a crumb between her fingers. A little piece of oat. Then she stuffed her rations into her pocket to save the granola bar for later. 

“Hey! You’re not even hungry, Asa gimme your rations!” Denji asked her

“Pay such breakfast taxes to your betters!” Power yelled trying to stuff her hands into Asa’s pockets. 

“I am hungry, Denji.” Asa mumbled as she tried ot shake off the stupid beast. “Ugh would you get off of me?!”

“Whatchu gonna do dance me off?” Power laughed. “HAHA HA HA. You can’t! I am simply too great!” 

Asa didn’t really know what to say to that, instead she threw Power to the ground with all her strength. The fiend landed hard,  laughing all the way. “Whats so funny?” Asa said with a pout on her face

Power held up the partially eaten granola bar. 

Heat rose up her face, it was probably replaced with the head of a cherry by now. Why was she so embarrassed? Her only mission ever and she hadn’t even done anything. Just failed in a petty fight over something totally worthless. Hopefully Kishibe wouldn’t find out… 

No way was she gonna stick with those numskulls and no way was she gonna hang with the defeated and depressed Arai and Kobeni. Even in her sleep Kobeni kept hold of that rusty old knife. What really made Asa nervous was how she gripped it, as if it were the ledge the girl was about to fall off of. 

So Asa couldn’t return to their room…instead she just kept walking. She walked a long while through the hallway until she ended up back where the devil they killed was. Previously a small harmless thing, like yeast in bread the creature had doubled in size. Human parts overlapped and twisted together in knots over the fleshy colored thing. She took a step back, and considered calling out to the others when it spoke,

 “Lets negotiate……..” is whispered out of its uglt little face. 

Asa jumped away in shock “No way!” she turned to go find the others when it reached out and gripped her leg. Stylistically she performed a Grande Pirouette  and quickly regretted it. On the grand stage Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake began to ring out from the orchestra pit. Somehow she could feel the ballet devil’s happiness that Asa took on the devil herself.

“Foolish human, bring me the heart of Denji and you may all go free! I am Eternity. There is no escaping me,” 

Commanded by her own body, as Asa heard the orchestra begin the Odette Variation she began to dance. With each movement of her arms, or clean arabesque it was like the Devil took a certain amount of damage. It yelped and cried out “That hurts!” 

In this domain it was like the creature still growing  and still moving towards her was slowing down. As the tempo of the music grew so did her movements as she gracefully finished and posed while the audience applauded. She tiptoed off stage as a faceless corps de ballet took the stage. The corps held him there for a little while as Asa returned to reality. There wasn’t a whole lot of damage done she could tell, but it had been distracted enough she could rush off and find the others. 

The whole gang casually stood around the devil watching it shrink and grow. “Make a contract with me…” it groaned “Just feed that one there to me and you may all go in one piece!” it declared, “Even you silly dancer…I will not hold grudges.”

Aki turned to Asa and looked her straight in the eye, “Did you fight that thing?” there seemed to be genuine concern in his voice. They all looked at her, even if it was just with bored curiosity. 

It felt… nice. Being noticed made her feel as if she were glowing “In a way, I don’t think I did much damage. Even if you get him to shrink it just grows right back,” she could at least try and be helpful with what she had learned. “It can definitely feel pain!” 

Kobeni pushed passed Asa, knocking the girl to the floor. She pointed her knife at Denji shaking all the way, “Lets just kill him!” she shrieked and dove in. Denji prepared himself with the ax, but didn’t need to as Himeno’s ghost hand pinned the girl against the wall. “Aki! Just have Kon eat it!” 

He tried and failed so letting go of Kobeni, Himeno attacked it herself. Once more it cried out and just kept creeping towards them. “You cannot kill me. My heart isn’t even on the 8th floor! So come at me and I’ll just eat Denji myself.”

Kobeni looked at Aki with tears in her eyes. 

“If this thing wants Denji it has something to gain from him. Its pointless to throw Denji into the fire even if we get out,” 

Denji still looked on guard, but walked over to Asa and helped her up. “Sorry about the rations I guess,” he said and she followed him back up to the room. 

They could hear the adults argueing down the hall. Plus the stupid rambling of Power. It was a little awkward to just sit next to him on the bed, but she didn’t really have anything to say and neither did he. In a way, just sitting with a boy her age was kind of odd. But calm. It was nice. She guessed. Before this mess she never really talked to boys so sitting here was odd. Well, her ballet instructor had her and a boy practice a pas de deux, that was kind of like this until she fell at the worst moment and no one wanted to partner with her anymore. 

“I didn’t really-” she began to say when the room began to rotate. Trying to stand she lost her balance and tumbled over to the side of the room the held the now sideways door. Himeno, Aki, Kobeni, and Arai all rushed in, Power climbing up from the side just as it locked in at a 90 degree rotation. 

“ I demand his heart!!! ” the Eternity Devil cried

She noticed her hand landed on his by accident in the fall. She whipped it off as soon as she could. That was weird… 

Denji didn’t seem to notice and pushed his way to the front by the door. 

“I think I’m going to use the sword, okay Himeno?” Aki said about to draw the sword on his back, when ghost hands gripped all around him and threw him past Asa into the window of the room. 

“Sorry Denji.” Himeno said as a struggle broke out 

Aki rushed back to the front but wasn’t as quick as she was as Asa got in the way of Kobeni’s blade. She cried out but didn’t let the tears in her eye fall. “If I can get in the way of you killing the strongest one here minus Aki I’m glad to have died. Now I don’t care who kills that thing as long as they do it right now!” 

There was a scramble around her as Kobeni insisted this wasn’t her fault! Himeno started to freak out and Arai shuffled off into a corner. Even Aki seemed resigned, except for Denji. He stood up and hung out the door. 

“Heh, I’ll just turn into the chainsaw, and  you said it hurts when it takes attacks. So I’ll just cut him up until he wishes he’s dead!” 

Thats how they stayed for three days. Asa’s rib cage was wrapped up to high heaven with bandages to keep the bleeding to a minimum. She wanted to complain about the pain but couldn’t let herself when she heard the roar of a chainsaw deep below. Really she just wanted to go home…

They emerged from the hotel with Asa on Aki’s back. She was grateful for him to take care of her while she was an invalid. Denji was even worse for wear, immediately collapsing as soon as he stepped out of the building. It must have been relieving to see the sunlight. 

At the hospital Kishibe visited her, “You did good on the last mission, I heard from Himeno,”

Asa turned her head, she felt embarrassed under his gaze. Like she didn’t do enough. 

“I trained her too, she told me you had skill. Kept a cool head. Taking on the devil yourself wasn’t a very good idea at your current level. I also heard you couldn’t do much damage but neither could anyone else.”

“Yeah, and everyone went crazy for a while until Denji killed it,” Asa mumbled 

“Maybe you could do with your own weapon,” He scratched at his beard. “Sword? Or would you rather not use a blade?” 

Asa looked at him now, he was being surprisingly nice. Maybe he actually was happy with how it all turned out. “That might be cool…” Asa let herself be proud. “Are you coming to the dinner party tonight?” she asked excitedly

“No,”

“Oh,” she always got ahead of herself, maybe she didn’t actually want to go. It’d probably be lame anyway, but even though Denji was a pervert he could be pretty cool. Makima was invited to go as well, secretly Asa wished their boss would flake. Asa had never met the woman before, just thinking about it made her hands sweat. What if she didn’t like Asa? What if she pretended Asa wasn’t there? 

“Maybe I won’t go…” Kishibe had already left, so now she just sat alone in the hospital room. Her hair was still oily, and she had to find something nice to wear. Everyone else was already out of the hospital and Asa was being discharged that night. It felt weird to be alone.

She walked out, and the hospital’s dark hallways still held a cascade of fading blueish light. The sugar plum fairy Pas de Deux played through the speakers when out of the corner of her eye she saw the old ballet instructor. Asa walked over and sat down next to her on a fluffy quilted chair. “I wanted to reward you with something for doing such a good job with that devil,”

“Oh thats very nice of you,” Asa nodded and went back to sitting and staring in the chair. Slowly as though she were floating back up into reality, Asa began to wake up.

And see Power approximately 2 inches from her face. Asa shrieked, and nearly fell off the bed “you shouldn’t do that Power!” She said

Denji walked into the room with his hands in his pocket, obviously impatient. “I told you so,” he then held up a little brown paper bag. “Aki picked up a pair of clothes for you so get up and lets get dinner already,”

Inside she found a nicely folded longsleeve shirt and black skirt. A white bow with a silver swan clasped to the middle fell out as well. Asa quickly dressed and ran after the devils “Wait up!” She yelped.

Chapter Text

Denji’s mood greatly improved as they arrived at the restaurant. She assumed he was impatient to meet Miss Makima as well. Or maybe he already knew her and the boss was nice! As they settled down and ordered some food the newbies were introduced to many no name people Asa hoped she wouldn’t have to work with too much. With Denji on her left and Power on her right Asa felt as if she was one of them arguing around the table. Its an odd feeling to belong. Like a full stomache or a sunny day. 

The food was good as they ate round robin. Denji and her were the only ones drinking tea instead of beer. Because of this Asa felt as though she may have been the most sober at the table, Denji being preoccupied with his promise of a kiss. 

Miss Makima would come by a bit later, so as to get the party rolling each Newbie stod up and introduced themselves. As they went around the table Asa wasn’t exactly sure what to say, only that she hoped her coleagues thought of her a someone professional and suave. So as it got closer to her turn Asa practiced what she would say. She ran it through her head a couple times quickly memorizing it into perfection when Denji finshished up and it was her turn to speak. 

She stood up with grace and tried to say in a polite and demure tone “My name is Asa Mitaka I am turning 17 this December. I have a pet cat named Crambon who is very cute and I dance as a hobby. I currently have a contract with the ballet devil,” 

“Well my cat Meowy could totally destroy your terrible inept cat,” Power said

“Inside voice,” Aki said

“Whatever,” Asa rolled her eyes. Stil she could tell she must have made a good impression with the no name devil hunters in front  of her. It made her smile quite delighted. 

They all divulged into their own conversations, when after a heated argument with Power  over proper care for a cat (something Asa didn’t know enough to touch on) she overhead. “Well its not like I can read!” from Denji on her left. 

“You can’t read?” She asked

“Nope! Never learned how!”

“Did you not go to school?” 

“Nah, I was too busy working with Pochita,”

“Is Pochita the devil in your heart?” 

He nodded and went back to eating. 

“Um, well, did you ever want to go to school?” She asked

“Not really, seems like a pain.” 

“School can actually be kind of fun, when you have some friends. Reading can be pretty essential too, I bet you noticed its harder to get around here than the country side.”

“Mhh ye- kinda” he technically agreed with a full mouth. 

It made her a little nervous to say, so she just considered it for a minute eating her own food. It would give her an excuse to hang out more and give even herself a taste of normalcy. She opened her mouth and closed it, then after another bite asked “If you wanted me too, I could teach you how to read-” when he actually looked up from his food Asa immediately regretted what she just said “Unless you don’t want to! I don’t need to get in your way of like I dunno, whatever…” Asa had never taught anyone as dumb as him before, how would she even teach him? Where? At Aki’s house? She didn’t even have that much free time, and she meant to get a practice space and had to learn how to wield a new weapon and… 

Denji seemed shocked by the offer. There was a lull in the conversation, and Asa could tell he probably thought it was stupid. He blushed. She blushed. 

“That could be nice,” he said. 

Asa wanted to assume he meant it in that earnest sort of way she felt at the hotel. She smiled a little, “Do you wanna-?”

Himeno butted in from the other side of the table grabbing Denji’s face “Heyyyy don’t I owe you a kiss?” she said cutely pouting.

“Yeah you do!” 

Asa noticed a beautiful woman walk into the building and suddenly the beautiful woman was beside them. Her legs were long and the woman’s thick hair was pulled into a professional braid. Already feeling small as the woman opened her mouth it was like Asa shrank again.

In Tchaikovsky’s The Nutcracker Clara is pulled into a dream where she is as small as her toys and they all engage into a battle of nutcrackers vs mice. All around them the Christmas tree grows to its massive size and Clara has shrunk to mouse size. Asa can see herself as the nervous Clara and who she assumed was Makima in the beautiful Sugar Plum Fairy costume. 

“Are you going to kiss someone, Denji?” Makima playfully asked. 

“Of course not!” He cried

Himeno leaned down in front of him, her shirt was unbuttoned to a point Asa and Denji both got a full view of the woman’s breasts “Ehhh your not going to kiss me?”

“Of course I will!”

Asa just turned away to unengage, while the table erupted in laughter. After a sip of tea she imagined was liquid courage she stood up and looked towards Makima. She bowed “We haven’t met before M’am, my name is Asa Mitaka and I’ve recently joined Public Safety. Thank you for this opportunity,” she sat back down hoping no one noticed her cherry red face. 

“Its a pleasure to meet you as well Miss Mitaka, you are so polite. Denji and Power could learn a thing or two,” Makima laughed. 

“Asa’s going to teach me how to read!” Denji excitedly said, he was like a dog hopping for approval. Asa couldn’t say she was much different from him, preening from such praise. 

“How nice of you, a lot of learning is ahead of you.” Makima waved down another beer “Are you staying with Kishibe now? How is that?” 

There was something alluring about Makima’s eyes, it made Asa just happy someone was looking at her “It is very nice. Even though he is a drunkard I have to stay on my guard I’ve learned a lot from him,” 

Denji glanced back and forth from Makima to Asa “Ehh? Who’s Kishibe??” He said with a full mouth 

“A great devil hunter,” Makima said 

“The best devil hunter,” Asa agreed 

Their conversation continued as a smooth lazy river on anecdotes of the Eternity devil, a common interest in the countryside, and the gun whatchamacallit Denji found in the hotel. It was interesting to learn more about devils from a professional like Makima as she told stories of amazing devil hunters. Asa could only aspire to be as good as them. She thought that Denji was only paying attention to Makima’s face. Observing the men at the table, they were all enraptured by their boss. It was something Asa noticed often, that beauty was a very powerful tool she did not possess. At school Asa would see a popular girl who was friendly and obviously wearing makeup command the attention of everyone in her class. Asa could never do that, and she couldn’t stand those kind of people who just follow in line with whatever that girl would say. Was Asa doing that  now? Or just listening to her boss? 

As more people began joining the conversation Asa could feel herself being pushed out. It was getting late. She should probably just go home. 

Outside in the cool night air Asa couldn’t convince herself to go home yet. She didn’t want to walk in the city alone either. It’d be awkward to wait until everyone was done to leave though… in her pocket was the flip phone Asa’s mother owned when she was alive. Asa could probably call Kishibe with that. He might just come down and try to kill her. 

She sank down to her knees against the wall “This is so annoying” as she said that the she could hear the rustling of the door. Aki stumbling and drunk came out and sat beside her. 

“You want a smoke?”

Asa shook her head “No I don’t smoke, my company never allowed it,” 

He lit one “Not like you’ll live long enough to feel the risk anyway,” 

“Actually-” Asa wanted to go into the details of smoking’s dangers “nevermind” she knew it would bother him. 

“Try it,” 

So she took the cigarette and inhaled. When she finally exhaled coughing the smoke flew into the sky like wisps in the wind. It was satisfying to look at. 

Aki took it back and gave her her own “Gotta have some release in this line of work.” 

They sat together for a while, before Aki broke the silence “Himeno puked all over Denji, I think he’s hiding out in the bathroom. It’d be a big favor if you could take him home for me,” 

“Why can’t he walk himself home?”

“Doesn’t wanna,” 

“Okay I guess” Asa dusted herself off. 

_________

In exchange Asa was rewarded with all the cash in Aki’s pocket. 

It felt a little disingenuous to take the money like that but Asa didn’t have it in herself to give it back. She was also glad to have someone to walk home with, even if it was just on the way. Denji had taken his shirt off and was walking in the cold in just and undershirt. She felt bad for him, no silly condolences came out of her mouth however. 

“That was my first kiss y’know” 

“That sucks,” 

The kept walking, Denji seemed embarrassed by it and she didn’t want to make him uncomfortable. 

“I shoulda just waited for Ms Makima to kiss me! At least then I wouldn’t have gotten puked on..”

Asa sorta side eyed at him “You want Ms Makima to kiss you? Isn’t that a workplace violation?” 

“Nuh uh,” 

“Yea huh,” talking to Denji always made her feel stupid 

“Well its fine cause we have a deal!” he proudly stated “I get anything I want if I kill the gun devil,”

Its still pretty weird to kiss your employer  Asa thought but just walked ahead of him further until they reached a 7-11. It was a cute place, and Asa had kind of liked the feeling of smoking that cigarette. They walked in together to find some high school aged girl start to throw out the donuts in one of the cabinets. 

“Hey stop that!” Denji ran over and stuffed at least 3 donuts in his mouth at once. Asa grabbed one, the jelly filled treat was pretty good. 

“Its fine that we take these right?” she asked 

“They were throwing them away anyway.” Denji shrugged “I bet someone will eat them out of the trash,” 

Asa found herself at the counter Denji carrying a bunch of donuts in his arms behind her. She looked up at the huge wall of cigarettes and scratch off tickets. She spotted a white and cream colored case labeled vanilla and bought it. She was nervous but when they asked to see her ID she showed them her devil hunting card and the didn’t even look at the date of birth. 

“That was exciting,” she said to Denji as they came out of the convenience store. 

“What was exciting about it?” he asked 

“Well buying these was against the law, so kind of cool right?”

“Cigarettes are against the law?!? They’ll have to put Aki in for life then”

“Well, no, but cigarettes are against the law for us to buy,”  she said “We’re too young,” 

“But look it says no tobacco, ain’t that like saying theres no alcohol?” Denji said 

“Oh, maybe that why…” Asa got red in the face again, “Hey I thought you couldn’t read?” 

He just shrugged “Lemme try one,” Denji said so she got them both one cigarette. 

“This is kinda lame, its not like we can go back for a lighter…” she rolled her own cigarette between her fingers. They reached the apartment complex by then and she was planning on leaving him at the door. “I guess this is where we part,” she said 

“Aki told me we were going to your house?” 

Asa looked at him funny “He told me the opposite,” 

“No way, the guy is supposed to walk the girl home,”

“You don’t have to do that,” 

“Nah I should! Who knows whats out at night??”

“Hey, I’m a devil hunter too!” she should’ve told herself that earlier. 

Denji smiled “Lets head up for a lighter, then I’ll walk you home,”

When he came back he carefully lit both of their cigarettes. With him so close to her face Asa blushed. She should have taken it out of her mouth to let him light it but she didn’t. On the street they were backlit by the brightlights of cars behind them. She couldn’t see the stars anymore in the city, the bright pin pricks of light in the night sky was replaced by dark clouds. Their puffy smoke floated up into the night sky and dissipated into the air, leaving the night wind smelling like smoke.

“Do you think I’ll taste puke every time I kiss someone now? I dont know if I’ll ever forget” Denji asked

Asa was still smiling from the pleasant walk, she felt like if she didn’t sit down right then she would die from the biting pain in her porcelain feet. She had thought she would never get used to the feeling, but everyday she survived a little longer.

Feeling brave she gave him her half gone cigarette, sticking the lip side into his mouth.

“Well, that’s kinda like your first indirect kiss… maybe you can remember that too,” she slowly walked into the house turning back just to look at him once.

Chapter Text

The ramen restaurant Asa was going to meet Aki, Hiimeno, Power, and Denji in rumbled with the bustling of a large crowd. She had voted to go to a peaceful cafe to study but Denji and Power insisted this ramen place was really good. Having gotten there early to set up she already ordered a bowl of ramen and didn’t end up taking out the teaching supplies she stayed up all night to put together. It was too busy and dirty to teach Denji anything. 

“Yo! Asa!” Denji waved entering the restaurant. The little family plus Himeno joined her at the booth and ordered their own food. 

“Where’s the books?” Power asks searching the table. She had a pair of cat eye glasses on her face. 

“I thought it’d be too loud in here so we could go to the library after lunch,” Asa explained “Do you think those will make you look smarter?” she asked as a loud BANG rang through the streets. Asa didn’t recognize the sound but could feel the hairs on her skin raise in fear.

“What was that sound?” Denji asked 

Power snapped “A drum obviously stupid mortal!”

“Maybe theres a festival going on,” Asa said 

Intinsically, as serious as murder Aki said “A gun,” 

That was when a well dressed man eating gyoza looked up and made eye contact with Asa from across the restaurant. He looked at her and then Aki and then Denji. The way his eye’s glanced from them and focused in on the boy sitting next to her Asa could tell he recognized Denji. 

“Hey, do you know this gu-?” 

He interrupted her “You eat so fast, doesn’t it taste bad?” 

“Eh?” Denji asked 

“Whats your deal?” Himeno asked

“Yeah! I’ll eat how I want!” Power said 

The man shook his head “Its too bad, your pallet just isn’t refined,” He pointed at Asa and said “I can tell just by how she eats that she is more refined than you. The only way to have one is to have eaten lots of different kinds of food as a kid. I guess you just didn’t but my grandpa would take me out to eat all kinds of different flavors. Thats how I have such a good pallet. He was a good guy, he was yakuza but he was a just yakuza. People like that are a necessary evil, you could count the number of woman he killed on one hand,”

They all just looked at the man, Asa didn’t really know what to say. 

“Everybody liked him. Didn’t you too Denji?” 

As the guy leaned closer to Denji, Asa was glad she was on the inside of the booth closest to the wall. He pulled out a photo of an old man, “Who is this guy?” Asa whispered to Denji. He ignored her. Then he was shot. 

Screams broke out in the restaurant as Aki and Power sprung into action. Aki summoned Kon and for a second the whole building was eaten. The booth they sat at was blown apart, as she came back to consciousness she felt something heavy covering her. It was not rock, but something soft and squishy and wet .

Opening her eyes she pushed the thing and found it was Denji’s body shot up with bullet holes. 

His eyes were open but she couldn’t tell if there was any life in them. She screached and vaguely heard Aki directing Power, but over the shrill ringing in her ears she couldn’t understand anything. From the only minor aching in her body Asa could tell she was probably unhurt. It was hard to tell thought with the bum bum bum  of a metronome at 4/4 tempo beat against her chest. 

Asa scrambled away from the body. She shivered looking around at the rubble. Power leaned over Himeno oh no Asa thought is Himeno okay?

  Further away Aki engaged with a freakish devil creature with the face of a long blade. It was similar to how Denji looked in the chainsaw form. Aki seemed to have won when a strange woman with bleach blonde hair came out of the rubble and helped the devil back up. 

Asa felt like she should get up, to try and do anything to help,  but her body couldn’t make herself get up. Only when Aki’s body hit the floor did she rush over to him. 

By his side Asa could get a good view a Himeno’s body. Blood was everywhere. The woman didn’t look afraid or upset though. Her eyes had a resolve Asa couldn’t tear away from. Himeno whispered something and suddenly in her place stood the Ghost Devil in her complete glory. All that Asa could do was watch as Himeno’s body disipated into thin air. It didn’t fade slowly, or disapear in the blink of an eye. It was like the limb was curling up rapidly and snapped into the void. As the Ghost Devil advanced and advanced against the katana more and more of Himeno disipated until all that was left were the bloody suit and eyepatch. 

They both could only stare in shock, when Asa heard the roar of a chainsaw and snapped her head to see Denji rise from the dead. 

From there Asa couldn’t even try to keep track of what happened.

______________________

Basically everyone died. 

It was an unfortunate occurance, but something that Kishibe warned her of. At the end of the day Asa went home and made a good dinner. She experimented with cutting hotdogs and vegetables into cute shapes and put them in Kishibe and her bentos for tomorrow. Last night she purchased some colorful plastic sticks to hold together sandwiches and to pick up fruit without getting your hands dirty. It was funny to give Kishibe the cute strawberry one. 

In the morning Asa met Denji in front of the hospital. Their patrol route was to be a big circle around the city and after they made that loop twice they’d split up after a quick lunch break. Asa didn’t know where Denji would go afterwards, but she was headed to do lots of paperwork… Asa frowned at just the idea of doing that. 

Denji walked out of the hospital casually. His hands swinging and whistling. Asa waved and they started their patrol quickly. It shocked Asa how much she was paid to basically just go on a long walk every day. Sure, sometimes she would have to defeat a low level devil but typically patrols like this were easy money. 

Lately she had been training with Kishibe to wield a long thin fencing sword. She had to stay mindful of the prop when dancing and typically train her adagio to handle the heavy thing. Asa actually really enjoyed the prop. The prop was gifted to her in the shape of a silver swan pin by the ballet devil and would sometimes transform into a fan or tambourine as well. 

While patrolling she wanted to show Denji her knew tool against the first devil they saw. Maybe he wouldn’t care or thought it was a waste of time though… As the aproached the small butterfly devil she saw him take out his ax but stopped him “Do you wanna see something sorta uh cool?” 

“What is it?” Denji asked

She put a finger up to convey to give her one moment before she stepped en pointe and gracefully walked onstage into Act III Kitri Variation. The music felt springy and fresh against the cool morning as she danced with the fan in her hand. She lept across the stage and flipped open her fan to the beat of the music. The quick arabesque extension was difficult to do without getting lazy, and the force of landing from a jete felt like knives digging into her foot. 

The domain they entered was lit with warm lights and a cute village set behind her. The devi was killed quickly and despite that Asa kept dancing. She spotted Denji out in the faceless audience with his full attention on her, or she just imagined that. When she finished and was back in the streets of Tokyo Denji clapped. It was something no one had ever done after she went into the domain. Not Kishibe or any other buddies she was partnered with. It felt nice. 

“Cool,” He nodded at her “Next time I get to show you the cool shit I can do!” He pointed at himself with his thumb and a cocky grin grew across his face. They ran around the whole city fighting devil after devil, even the ones off their route just to one up each other’s latest kill. 

When they finished they were both exhausted and simply collapsed in the first public park they found. It was easy to lie down in the dewey grass and watch mothers and children play on the playground just meters away. 

“Is it fucked up, to not care when everybody dies? Everyone here could die right now, and I wouldn’t really give it much of a thought. I don’t think anybody dying would make me cry,” Denji said

“Thats not that bad. To me at least. My sensei tells me grief only holds us back.”

“So its good to not care?”

“I think… Himeno or anyone might want someone to cry over them to prove that they were loved. If you don’t love someone it doesn’t matter if you don’t cry. You’ll find new people to cry over anyway, so what is grief if not love endured?”  

Denji looked at her “But I love Makima and I wouldn’t cry over her,” 

“Do you really love her?” Asa stood up and brushed off the grass on her bum. She looked down at Denji’s face. He had a mild scowl.

 “Yeah, I do!” he said

“Then you would cry!” 

“No way!” 

“Admit I’m right or I won’t give you my extra lunch!” 

“Even more no way!” 

He chased after her and she ran. All over the park he chased her just a few steps behind. Reaching the stoop of a tall hill Asa tripped and fell over, the bento box tumbling out of her bag and cracking open, scattering the star shaped vegetables, octopus hotdogs, and onigiri all over the hill. She herself rolled down uncontrollably and landed scraped up with a huff. 

“My food!” she cried. It was stupid. She shouldn’t have even been running with the box in her unzipped bag. Now it was all covered in dirt. It was embarrassing the way her throat closed and her heart hurt. 

Despite her anxiety when she  looked up to the top of the hill and saw Denji quickly picking up all the food she was relieved. Oh yeah, this disgusting slob would eat anything…

“Now I get the biggest lunch!” 

Asa rushed back up and snatched a wrapped up onigiri from him. She plopped down next to him on the hill and ate her fill. She’d make a better lunch next time. 

__________________

Denji thought that the cemetery Makima took him and Power to was pretty similar to the park he was just in.  The rolling hills were only dotted in crosses here. There was a man at the edge leaning against a cross.

Makima motioned to him “This is-”

“SHH” this was the first time Denji heard anyone disrespect Ms Makima. 

He held up one finger “What do you think when your comrades die?” 

“I thought ‘They’re dead!’” Power shrugged

“Nothing much” 

He held up a second finger “Are you looking for revenge?” 

“Nah, revenge is so gloomy,” Denji said Power nodding beside him. 

“Who are your allies, humans or devils?”

“Whoevers winning,” Power said

“Whoever takes care of me,” Denji said

“Full marks”  Kishibe said. He waved off Makima and gripped the two devils in a hug. “My name is Kishibe, and I’m a devil hunter with the 1st division. I like to be called Sensei, so thats what you’ll call me. I love booze, woman, and killing devils,”

____________

After a whole day of being killed repeatedly, Power and Denji lied in the gravel of a country road. “I got killed prolly…20 times?” Denji asked

“I dunno,” Power leaned over and picked him up off the ground, “but we’ll get him tomorrow” she said with nervous confidence. “I got a super duper smart idea!”

Chapter Text

Kishibe walked through his front door to find Crambon rubbing against his leg. Cute cat.

On his nice leather couch Asa, Power, and Denji were draped over each other, like seals on a cold beach.

Over on the kitchen table were kids books and writing materials galore, Asa’s ‘teacher’ binder open to a random page on the floor.

When he approaches the couch Denji stirred pulling out his axe and shook the delicate pile awake. The dvd in the player was stuck on the opening screen. Asa popped up “Sensei!”

She runs into the kitchen Crambon now at her heels “I left some dinner for you, lemme warm it up!”

He nods after her and looks at the two devils he spent the last week killing nonstop on his couch. 

The coffee table had chips and cookies, french fries, a variety of meats, cheeses, and veggies cut up into cute shapes. There were puffy pastries and other goodies as well. Dipping sauces were scattered around the table. Sweet caramel with sweets and blue cheese and spicy mayo for the salty.

Kishibe sat on his couch and the devils straightened. He relaxed back and took a couple chips “So whats with the party?”

When Asa came back she had a warm bowl of curry in her hands that she gave to Kishibe.

“Its our celebration for finishing the Hiragana alphabet,” she smiled proudly.

“And maybe your last day on earth,” Kishibe sipped on the thick broth, “Better than your last try Asa,”

“Why does he get the best bowl!?” Power whined “Power’s minion abuses her!”

Asa sat down and gave a heart shaped carrot to Crambon “I kept an extra pot hidden so you wouldn’t eat it all,” she glared then gave a softer look to Kishibe “What do you mean last day on earth?”

“Tomorrow is these devils’ final test, in the event they don’t defeat the Katana and Snake I’ll have to decomission them,”

“Oh,” Asa didn’t think of that. It made sense however, if a devil hadn’t fulfilled his purpose than whats the point of keeping them? Its better to just get rid of them all. In the end, it didn’t matter that Asa taught Denji or Power anything. She couldn’t teach them anything that really mattered.

“I thought you were coming with us?” Denji asked

“No, I’m not technically with the fourth,” she shrugged “I wanted to go anyway, but Makima gave me the day off”

“But I wanted everyone to see me totally destroy Katana Man!” He whined

Asa shrugged “Whatever,” she started to clean up the table. Kishibe went to bed and Power and Denji slept on the couch.

It was a cold night. Summer was almost over.

Something in Asa’s gut told her she may never see them like this again. The feeling had a grip on her heart that hurt.

———

The train whipped by blowing Asa long black hair in the wind. She took a walk this morning and definitely regretted it by now. At this moment, it was her and a pack of cigarettes against the world. Maybe yesterday it was her and two weird friends against the world.

Asa hated devils but she didn’t hate them. She couldn’t understand why. On the street she would see an employed fiend and scowl but seeing Denji or Power made her so happy. Making the food for that party left a warm wave of affection through her heart that grew and receded like the tide.

Asa didn’t get on any trains. Cigarettes weren’t allowed. Instead she walked across the long stretch of subway. It was cool there with the intermediate gusts of wind on the warm summer morning. Her cigarette smoke got caught up with the wind if she got close enough and blown away with the train. Asa thought for a minute a piece of her smoke had probably gone all over Japan by now when she came up the other side of a long subway piece by mid day.

Denji wasn’t like other fiends. He wasn’t even really a fiend. Maybe it was different or maybe it wasn’t, but Asa couldn’t really be sure what he was. Or what he was to her.

It’s difficult. Difficult to have a friend. Its not like when your kids and just being in the same place means you become friends. Or maybe it was still like that. Would they hang out if they just went to school together? Asa would bet against that. She was so glad she didn’t have to be apart of the hell hole school was. All alone where the only thing she could do was study. All the people she hates most in such close radius. High school relationships that would fizzle away in a month, annoying boys competing for the position of class clown, and dumb teachers who thought just because she was quiet that meant she respected them.

How would Denji act in school? He liked their lessons but that was just because Asa was such a good teacher. When putting together each lesson plan Asa went to various elementary schools and spoke with the teachers there about attention spans and learning strategies to keep a person engaged while going over frustrating material. Denji was actually pretty quick however! Asa appreciated his effort. It took them a week and a half to understand the whole alphabet and longer to read children’s books. Especially with Power.

Now, with half their lessons for the Katakana alphabet done, Asa wasn’t sure if it would be a total waste of time.

Walking along the train line meant she had to come up for air once in a while, eventually the line would stop. Intermittently the time would pass without her realizing. She’d go down as night just barely receded to day, then come up to the morning rush of early morning commuters and lazy late night workers.

Her feet began to become unbearable, why does she do this to herself? The phantom of where she knows should bleed soaks her sneakers, but they aren’t stained red. The porcelain feet were awkward to find shoes for. It was embarrassing at the shoe store for everyone to know what she had done. The man helping her had a sympathetic smile to his face, but also refused to touch her. Asa left with the first pair that actually fit.

Asa stubbed out her cigarette on an ash tray and sat down on a bench across the street from a park. For a summer afternoon it was almost cold. Or that was just her.

Between gaps of cars Asa spotted families at the park. It must be a weekend… Asa didn’t know when but recently she had become unaware of the days passing. Work could either be really slow or so fast Asa could only act on reflex. Sometimes spending the whole day dancing bled into the next and she spent days without seeing the sun.

A child laughed with its parents. It grated against Asa’s ears. What was it about toys and swings and slides that made the kids so happy? What was it that had all these mothers whispering together sharing a secret? And what was it that made it so Asa could hear everything from all the way across the street?!?

As she sat at the bench she fumed and fumed. Something was gripping at her heart and squeezing .

Drop dead she thought.

She should try and calm down. Yet how could she, when her feet felt as though they were cut up and sautéed like flimsy onions? Asa could hardly bring herself to move.

Asa leaned against her cheek and closed her eyes. She let the soft breeze brush against her.

A tap tap tap softly sounded against her cheek. Asa opened an eye to see a little girl probably around the age of 6 or 7 tapping against her cheek. The girl was dressed in a leotard and tutu, with her hair tightly wrapped in a gelled bun.

“Hello,” the little girl said

“Hello..?” Asa replied where are your parents?

“The ballet rabbit with the ballet shoes?” She pointed at the keychain on Asa’s bag “Do you dance??” There was a childish glimmer and excitement in the girls eyes.

“Yes, I do. Where are your parents?”

“Really?? Where do you dance? I dance at La Fille, and in The Nutcracker last year I got to dance with the big girls!”

“Umm well, I used to dance in the countryside. Now I’m dancing for a… private company”

Way to make it sound like you’re a stripper Asa thought

“I dance a lot of variations, so I haven’t been in a production yet.”

“You should join our company!” The little girl shook Asa by the shoulder in excitement.

“Well…” Asa could imagine it now. Up on the stage. “I’d have to talk to my employer,” Asa stood up now and looked out around for any possible parent watching the interaction. She couldn’t find any, there was just a couple commuters. By now it was much later in the afternoon,

“Are you headed home? Or to your ballet school? Its important not to be late,”

The little girl shook her head “No its fine! Teacher said we should start recruiting!” The girl had a determined look on her face.

I assume she meant to recruit your friends Asa thought

Asa took the little girls hand. “You shouldnt be out here, lets get you home. Now what train do you take?”

“Um the A train until S stop and then we take B train to Essex street!” She said “but we should go to the studio first! You should go, you should go!”

“No. Your going home,”

The littlest girls face puckered and was replaced with a sour lemon, when tears began to fall from the girls eyes Asa rolled her eyes and got down to the girls level “I’m Asa, whats you name?”

“N-nana,” she said through tears

“Okay, well how about tomorrow I come by and we can go to the studio. Today you have to go home,”

“But tomorrows Sunday!” Nana cried harder “They aren’t open!”

“Then we can go Monday,”

“Really? You’ll really go with me?”

Nana seemed genuinely shocked. How many people have you approached like this? Asa wondered.

Taking the girl by the hand and after recieving a proper address Asa led them down to the trains. Asa found them a good seat at the back of the car, finally relaxing her feet once more. Nana chatted on about her company and their winter production. Apparently it was a small and up and coming company that recently found a theater that would host the winter show. Only problem was, they didn’t have a lot of talent.

Not anymore though, not if I dance there.

On the train it was cramped. Tons of people bustled and jostled themselves against each other.

She spotted a boy around her age glancing around, he was obviously agitated. When they came above ground even more so. He wouldn’t stop looking at the amount of people climbing on. Then to the buildings around them. Just as he braced for impact-

Chainsaw Man and the Katana burst through the ceiling. Quickly the train stopped and every door opened to the open rail way.

“All Passengers please leave the train,” calm instructions rang out.

People had to jump down onto the tracks as they rushed out. Woman and children were trampled, people tumbled down, it was a mess, but Asa didn’t pay it any mind. Mesmerized by the excitement in front of her, Asa couldn’t take her eyes off them. Just as Denji looked back at Asa and Nana one of Denji’s arms came flying off straight at them.

At that second the suspicious boy snatched her and Nana off the train. They crashed into the gravel rolling through the dirt. At that the doors slammed shut and the trains sped off once more.

Asa landed straddling the boy with Nana gripping her arm like a lifeline.

“Woah take a guy out to dinner first” the boy said laughing.

“Eh?” Asa asked then grew bright red and scrambled off him “I’m so sorry, sorry sorry,”

“No problem!” He popped up and pulled her up as well by the hand.

The boys hair was long, going past his ears and covering a part of his face. His green eyes had a cocky gaze that Asa knew she recognized somewhere…

“Do I know you?” Asa asked

“Maybe,” he smiled

“Did he dance with you?!” Nana piped up

“Well no I-“ Asa tried to keep Nana off her mission

The guy stared at Asa considered “Yeah I did!” He smacked his forehead “remember? I dropped you and you were so mad!” He laughed and laughed

“No! No way I saw you at public safety the other day thats how I know you,”

“Are you from Oarai?”

“…yeah, are you from Oarai?”

“Miri Sugo,” he stuck his hand out like for a handshake “at your service,”

Nana shook his hand from below “You should come to my company!”

“Company? Like a little law firm? Haha!” He laughed again “You guys are funng,”

“No my dance company,”

Miri seemed to consider it “Are you still dancing…Asa?” He asked

She didn’t say anything

“C’mon I was almost sure! Did I get the name wrong?”

“No you were right, I’m still dancing. For public safety now,”

“Ahh, I’m working for public safety too! Directly under Makima herself!”

Wow, was he that good? What was his contract? How did he manage that?

“You seem shocked” Miri said. He was smiling, like he was so proud of himself. It looked stupid.

Asa groaned “Why is every boy so obsessed with Miss Makima?” She rolled her eyes and took Nana by the hand once more.

“Hey where you going? Ain’t you gonna thank me!?”

“Thank you Miri!” She called rushing down off the train line and finding their way to the street.

He followed them taking Nana’s other hand. “Do you need any help finding your way home?” He asked

“N-“

“Yes!” Nana interrupted “you should come with us on Monday! We’re going to the studio!”

“Nana quit getting so excited about everything, we gotta find your way home.”

“Where does she live? Maybe I can help?” Miri asked like a little puppy dog.

Asa gave in “Go ahead,”

He took them single file through large crowds and filled trains to the little girls apartment complex. When they said goodbye to Nana with a promise to come back on Monday Asa finally got to ask the questions she was dying to know.

“How did you know Chainsaw Man was gonna crash back there?”

He smiled “I was waitin’ for you to ask that question,” and gripped her hand

“Hey let go!”

“Eh? But what if we get lost?” He pouted pointing with his free hand at the big crowds of Shibuya.

“Its not like I’m your girlfriend,” she shook him off “How did you know?”

He just shrugged “Makima told me to check it out, glad she was right or you would’ve been toast,”

Asa grumbled but didn’t say anything. Makima really does know a lot.

“Wait,” Asa held up her hand and pointed towards the outdoor seating of a pop up dango stand. “Lets sit down already,”

Sitting down was like a little piece of heaven. The sun was beginning to go down, and so was Asa’s tolerance for walking so long. She shouldn’t have taken Nana home… still seeing Chainsaw Man instead of Denji fight such a tough opponent was pretty cool. She closed her eyes and leaned back putting her feet up on the other seat.

Miri pulled up another seat and ordered them some food.

“Oh yeah, I forgot you’ve got a contract what’d you give up?” He asked

She glared at him and took off her shoe and socks

“Woah! Whats that thing?” He grabbed it and Asa hissed “its like porcelain or somethin’ the ballet devil?”

“Yup,” she kicked him off and put her shoe back on.

“So your like really really good now instead of just okay?”

“Hey I was good before!”

“Yeah maybe,” he played with a stick in between his teeth “Y’know the instructors were thinking of giving you a bigger role before you left, thats why I quit, they were gonna pair me up with Fumiko.”

Asa groaned at the mention of that whore.

“You couldn’t dance the pas de deux for shit though,” Miri finished

“Maybe I could, if I had a better partner,”

“Hey I was the best partner there was!”

“Well, I don’t like dancing with boys!”

“Heh,” he took out a lighter. It was shiny silver with something engraved on the front she couldn’t see. He flicked it flame and no flame, flame and no flame “You’re gonna have to if you wanna dance at that company, you’ll definitely be the principal dancer,”

“I’ll figure it out,” they got their food and kept walking, the sun had practically sunk into the see by now painting the sky orange and pink. Deep blue reached out from the east.

Asa pursed her lips “If your gonna dance at that company you might as well make a deal with the ballet devil,”

“Do you want me to?”

“I just don’t wanna dance with anybody I don’t at least know, and you can ask Miss Makima if we can in the first place,”

“You scared?”

“Of Miss Makima?”

“Yeah,”

Asa didn’t say anything. There was something about that woman. It definitely freaked her out, but was she scared?

Asa nodded and took a sideways glance at the boy next to her looking up at him.

”Maybe,”

Chapter Text

Rain hit the street, pitter patter pitter patter. It was cold as Asa felt pin pricks of rain slowly drench her clothes, she finally reached a touristy shop with souvenirs, cigarettes, and thankfully umbrellas. Shivering Asa fumbled for her wallet and traded coins for a clean white sweater that read I 💗 NEW YORK and a pink tinted umbrella that looked like a jellyfish. The sweater was warm and big enough Asa could keep her fingers in the long sleeves. 

Finally, she reached the cafe… an hour early. “Why do I always do this?” Asa asked herself, shaking out the umbrella and placing it in the holder by the door. 

“Welcome in!” an old barista said coming out from behind the curtain doorway Asa assumed led to the kitchen. 

“Thank you, is it okay if I smoke in here?” 

“But you’re so young! How’d you get in the habit already?” 

She ignored the question glaring “Can I smoke here?” 

“I don’t care, nobody’s here anyway, can I get you anything?” 

“Yeah umm,” Asa had never had coffee before, she usually didn’t have the money or time for those things. But her mom always stopped in the morning for a chai tea. “Can I get a chai tea? With cream?” 

The man hopped into action, eager to quit twiddling his thumbs she assumed. Asa found a spot in a booth and brought out her large binder. She flicked on an ugly little bic lighter and lit the end of her cigarette. It wasn’t the taste or the deep breath that relaxed Asa, but the smoke rising into the air. Seeing the cloud come out of her mouth felt as if it took all her worries away with it. 

The man came with a cute cup and saucer made of fine porcelain, steam floated up and away with it mixing with the smoke in the air. “There's that chai, and an ashtray for the cigarette,” he produced another fine porcelain dish. The white ashtray was small with divots in between and a lotus flower painted on the bottom. 

“Thank you sir,” 

“Your welcome, good to know some young people have manners,” he rolled his eyes

Asa took out her journal and began to write notes for when she’d begin teaching Denji and Power katakana. The binder had one or two different lessons for each topic organized by difficulty then enjoyment. Asa always tried to start with the easiest funner concept before working their way up to better understanding.  She hoped the numskulls would like her ideas for some of the crafts that would go along with the lessons. Inside clear pockets buttoned so that they wouldn’t be lost were her perfected crafts. The hardest one at the back of the binder was an origami rose with every letter on a petal and examples of how it was used written elsewhere. Asa just finished it the night before, she took it out and admired it.

 The little rose was cute, perfect creases, with Asa’s cleanest handwriting, if you ignore that one spot. It was pretty easy for Asa to make, if you ignore all the crushed up red paper in her trash can. 

Recently, Denji had been like a chased rabbit hopping all over the place with excitement. She tried to meet up with him and Power, but they were preoccupied. Power with being drained of excess blood, and Denji with the attention of Miss Makima. 

So, instead of hanging out with them Asa went out on an embarrassing limb and asked… Miri to go to the studio with her. They visited  La Fille that Monday just as they promised Nana to welcoming arms. Still, having to receive permission from their superiors Miri and Asa promised to come again soon. 

They were supposed to meet at 11. Instead Asa woke up at 7, brutally investigated herself in the mirror, wondered what ballet instructors would think of her outfit, ate a small breakfast full of protein and nutrients, tried on probably between 6 and 7 different outfits before finally settling on a long black skirt over a shorter pink wrap skirt, black tights, white leg warmers, and a white leotard. She had to admit the sweater was a pretty good pick along the way. 

When Asa picked up her bag straightened the bunny charm and stepped out the door Asa finally looked down at her mobile phone that it was only 9:10. Too embarrased to go home again Asa wandered through Tokyo’s sunny streets. 

But they didn’t stay sunny for long! 

__________________

Sorry, Asa Miri thought might be late. 

Having achieved permission for the two to dance at the company, a task Makima had said “Sure, why not” to “Just make a contract with the Ballet Devil first,” Now Miri was shuddering at the door to the Ballet Devil. I don’t want to give up my feet! This is nothing like having the Longsword Devil’s heart. 

He opened the door, to find himself in first position. 

Inexplicably dressed, ready to go, Miri was facing an older woman with red ribbons in her hair. Miri could tell she was once very beautiful, “ First, second, third, first good” 

Miri moved by instinct following the devil’s instruction. “Jete, jete, cabriole”

Quickly to a beat he did not hear but understood Miri moved his weight from one foot to the other before adjusting and hopping up into air and beating his feet together. She continued to instruct him until she was satisfied.

“Very good, child. What brings you here? Do you wish to make a contract?” 

“Yes ma'am,”

“Then what is it? You don’t want more power do you? With that poor devil as a heart,”

Miri shrugged at her comment, he stretched an arm over head. 

“I just want to keep up with Asa,” he melted to the floor and relaxed

The ballet devil took a curious glance at him “Why is that?” 

He didn’t answer that for a minute focusing on stretching. He was the one here to make a contract, what she grillin’ him for?

“I just like dancing with beautiful women,” he smiled. 

———

Asa considered a second cigarette, twiddling it between her thumb and forefinger. Miri was definitely late by now. That was so annoying but it wasn’t like Asa was gonna go out in the rain. 

Maybe she should. Then, she wouldn’t have to sit around here. Its rude to just take up a seat she only paid one drink for… Asa packed up the school bag. Maybe she really should go. 

Despite knowing this, Asa didn’t get up. She just held the bag in her lap and let the cigarette hang unlit from her lip. 

The studio La Fille they visited was small, obviously rented, on the third story floor of a building in the heart of Tokyo. The view was near a nice park and stretched out over the crowded streets, Asa spotted devil hunters littering the area before Nana dragged her away from the lobby to meet the instructors. 

Having visited Tokyo traveling with her dance company, Asa was familiar with all kinds of big cities. She had seen many beautiful views out of practice windows or at cast parties and never noticed the shifty eyes of devil hunters or the controlled chaos of employed fiends. Where her eyes skipped over before Asa now saw them stick out like a sore thumb. As a child on the street passing the damage of a devil fight Asa never considered how it may happen to her. She always assumed that was something that happened to other people, she always assumed that Public Safety was just any other organization to donate to. 

Under her chin a flame lit up her cigarette. 

Asa snatched the cigarette out of her mouth and looked up at Denji and a girl she had never seen before across from her in the booth. 

The pair cracked up laughing “Sir! Three coffees!” The girl said

The man grumbled “You’re on the wait staff ain’t you?”

Asa waved her hands “No, no you don’t have to get me a coffee. I’m just waiting to meet up with someone,” 

The girl got up “I’m Reze, and it's totally fine! I’ll make us something tasty,” she smiled mischievously and popped out behind the counter. 

“Who you waitin’ on?” Denji asked blowing the paper off a straw 

The girl was definitely beautiful, Asa noticed. “Miri and I are going to a new studio,” she explained “He was getting Miss Makima’s permission,” 

Denji seemed conflicted at the mention of Makima. He blushed, was this something about his crush on their boss? 

“Did I tell you about that movie date I went on with Makima? You should tell Miri about that” 

“Only nonstop all week,” Ass pointed out, frowning. She liked this, it was like catching up. “Do you miss Power as your buddy still?” 

Denji groaned at the mention of it, his face turned sour “Why aren’t you my buddy instead!?” 

“Still not in the fourth division,” Asa breathed out a cloud of smoke. 

“Would be better than Beam, why are fiends like that…” 

Reze came back with three drinks on a tray. Denji snatched his and tried it, obviously disliking it. Reze smiled at his disgust, hiding a laugh behind her hand when she touched his arm. 

“What’s with that face? You’re totally forcing yourself to drink it!” 

Asa was picking up on what Reze was putting down. Denji was obviously too by the blush on his cheeks. I have to get out of here, she thought. Quickly she sipped on the sweet latte, “This is very good, Reze,” she looked at Denji and pushed the mug towards him “you might like it a bit more,” she collected her bag and left the table. 

Like a spotlight Asa saw Miri walk into the empty cafe. “Goodbye Denji, Reze!” She grabbed Miri by the arm and turned him on his heel back out of the shop. 

______

Reze put her head in the palm of her hand and smiled at the boy in front of her, dusting a small blush across her cheeks. This might be harder than I thought…

Denji couldn’t help the feeling rising up in his chest. Does she… like me? This feeling was different than when he hung out with Power or Asa. But, it also wasn’t like how he felt at the theater with Makima.

With Asa conversation flowed or didn’t, he didn't need to say shit. Asa was an asshole anyway but at least she was entertaining. She was like Power in that way. 

With Makima how did he feel?

Denji couldn’t be sure. 

 Like… a snake was curled around his heart leaving tension throughout his body. It was uncomfortable, and the best. He wanted to speak and to say something and show her something good about himself, but when she looked at him he didn’t need to. Makima already saw it all. Staring straight into his heart. 

When Reze looked at him, she didn’t know anything. At least he thought so. She liked him. She likes me, he reassured himself then why does she look at me the same way Makima does? 

“Was that a coworker of yours?” Reze asked

“Yeah, that's Asa,” he smiled “I’m stuck with this fiend right now and Asa’s annoying as hell for a buddy but at least she’s kinda cool,” 

“It was her boyfriend who picked her up just now eh? Do you know him?” 

Boyfriend? “I dunno,” Asa does not have enough game for a boyfriend,

 “I’ve seen him a couple times around public safety, and uh they dance together or somethin’” Denji shrugged “She mostly just teaches me and Power how to read,” 

Reze considered this for a minute “You’ve never been to school have you?” 

“Nuh uh,” he took a sip of the latte, it tasted a whole lot better than his drink. 

“Thats pretty fucked up, working as a devil hunter and not going to school,” she leaned in closer to the boy looking at him with a calculated excitement in her face “shall we go then?” 

___________

“Hey what was that about? I wanted a treat!” Miri cried as Asa dragged him away from the cafe. 

“I met up with Denji,” Asa glared trying to hide the embarrassed blush on her face. It was so weird to see that. 

“Oh, hey who was that girl he was with? I thought he was like a devotee to Makima. I bet his girlfriend won’t be able to handle that,” Miri laughed 

Girlfriend? As if. 

Asa rolled her eyes. The rain had cleared, streets filled out with people. She took her new umbrella from Miri and shook it out.

Who, who, who

Above them an owl hung off the gutter or a building. 

Who, who, who

The owl curled its head making direct eye contact with Asa. Asa continued to walk past it, her angle of view curving as she walked without looking away. What took her attention was the spiral pupil of its eye. In a way, the spiral reached out and wrapped around Asa drawing her in. 

At the studio, the bird still lingered in her mind.

Asa performed alone now, Miri and their instructor watching. She breathed deeply and excuded grace in front of the important woman. It was different to dance like this than in a battle or showing off. Here the most important gaze in the room looked straight at her. Expressionless. The woman gave no sign of pleasure or displeasure. 

Asa took a short step taking her arm and slowly spreading it before her like uncurling a roll. A casual precipitee floated up into the clean slightly curved line of a bournonville jete Asa imagined the slight fraction of a second at the height of the jump she was hung there by strings. For that fraction of a second Asa and the bird were one being that achieved ballon

She envisioned the bird hopping from spot to spot then flying off, in the air it wasn’t like an eagle pushing off into the sky or a chick taking a dip before shakily flapping their wings. It was a clean suspension into the air. 

 Anticipating the quick pace the music Asa began a pique turn menege around the room. She performed a quick turn raising one foot like the english letter p towards the back of the room. She charged back at a rapid pace with distinct control in the foot she raised and lowered. Curving her path to create a circle. 

Soon after Asa finished her performance and bowed. Asa couldn’t help the blush on her face or the anxiety bubbling in her gut. Miri smiles at her. Asa glanced from him to the woman back at him and back to the instructor. Sometime in Asa’s avoidance of eye contact, the instructor smiled. She approached Asa and took the girl’s hands. “I can feel your love for dance Miss Mitaka. I can also see your hard work, I would be delighted to have you dance for us here,” 

Asa finally let her heart melt and a tension to leave her shoulders. Then it wasn’t the ballet devil with her, but only Asa’s desire fueling her dancing. 

Asa gripped her instructor’s hands in turn “Thank you,”  she bowed and when she looked up her demure smile gazed up at Miri. 

Asa… Miri thought, something unidentifiable crackling and smoking around his heart floating up into his face. When the instructor nodded to them and left Asa squealed in delight. She didn’t seem to notice him as she pranced around the studio. 

Miri very rarely saw this smile. He very rarely got the chance to look at her this long. 

 Consumed by her whimsy Asa performed a collection of chaine turns. Without thinking and without considering what joining the company would mean, Asa's joy radiated through the room. Miri could practically feel the warmth. At once Asa looked at him  and raised her arms above her head to create an egg shape and twirled her hands over each other. Dance with me. 

There is a youthfulness Miri often fails to recognize in Asa’s dancing then. Miri goes to her and takes her hand. They dance. 

____________

Asa twirled through the streets without regard for her fellow commuters or the heavy rain. The drops easily evaded the girl’s swinging umbrella biting into her skin. She finally stopped at her bus stop, and sat down. 

Who, who, who

By now night fell, as did the shudder of harsh rain against every surface. Asa was ten minutes early for the bus. At the stop she was grateful to be sheltered from the rain and mucky waves crashing against the curb by cars. The small light that illuminated the space flickered on and off. A moth scraped away and bounced off the bulb. Asa watched it. She replicated the little bug by petite jete petite jete. 

Asa quickly stopped. Her feet could have practically cut open by the way they felt. Asa didn’t let the pain show on her face. 

On the bus Asa’s eyes began to flutter. She gripped her bag tightly and made a best effort to pinch herself each time the urge to let go of consciousness overcame her. Despite this, and without realizing, sleep overtook her. 

In the studio Asa slowly stretched her aching soul. It was cold. The air in the wide open space circulating. 

“Why do you dance?” The devil with pink bows asked

Asa looked up. It was cold. She didn’t understand what the devil was asking. 

The devil repeated itself “Why do you dance,” 

Why did you dance without me? The devil expressed

Asa broke eye contact “I dunno…” it wasn’t like Asa specifically decided not to allow herself to use the ballet devil’s power. The idea didn’t just come to her. When Asa heard the music she was fully herself. Like the foam on a wave. Unpolluted. 

“I wanted… control. I wanted to control myself and I- I didn’t want anyone else to say I’m not enough. I’m a good dancer. I have to be,” 

The creature slunk over to Asa “Why do you have to be?” 

Asa looked up at it, the devil’s shadow pulled like taffy over the floor and over her prone body. It had never appeared so close to her. Asa could finally see the devil’s eyes properly as they were made of peppermints and her long thin body had a slight pink tone and waxy finish thick gooey sweets did. Why do you have to be? 

Asa opened her eyes to find an empty bus minus the body she unconsciously leaned her head against. Through the hazy fog of waking up only to fall asleep again Asa recognized the blonde hair and public safety uniform . It was Denji staring straight ahead on the early morning bus. He noticed she was awake and turned his head. She saw across his face the downturn of his mouth and the slow blink of tiredness himself. It was still raining outside, permeating into the bus. He was cold, she could tell. 

Was Denji mad at her? 

Why was he next to her? 

She considered this as her eyes grew heavy, Denji was no Prince Desire but at that moment Asa felt like a sleeping beauty awakened by her charming prince. The moment implanted itself in her mind. The morning sun had come up high enough to just reach out across the deep dark landscape and paint the world a deep ocean blue through thick rain clouds. Her gold rays would not reach out to hold the earth for another couple minutes or so and the blue would disappear without them realizing it. 

But now Asa’s eyes slipped close and all she had of the experience was the dream-like memory. Its butterfly fluttering about her mind evading exact capture once she woke up shivering once more on top of her warm sheets. 

Chapter Text

Kishibe found himself waiting on his leather armchair nursing a whiskey on the rocks. The humiliation that brat put on him. By 2 AM Kishibe started to get nervous about the young girl under his care. When he awoke from a long ass nap he entered her room, keen to demand dinner when he found no one there. 

At 3 he called Asa’s little friend Miri, and after discovering he left her on the street hours ago, he called the Hayakawa household. 

That girl Kishibe thought. 

At 5 AM in the morning Asa arrives home dead on her feet, sheepish. 

Kishibe prepared to go into a long rant he had been preparing all night, before stopping. “What the fuck, Asa” he covered his eyes with his hand. He said nothing. 

The girl fidgeted with some clip in her hair. “I-

He waved his hand, silencing her. “Don’t be hanging around that delinquent Miri no more,” 

“Hey, I know I fucked up but he’s got-“ 

“Just listen to the words coming out of my mouth, Asa. You know you live here out of the kindness of my heart right? I could just as easily kick you to the curb and say figure it out. But I ain’t gonna. So I’m telling ya, don’t bring that kid around no more,” 

Asa looked down. She understood she fucked up, but what did Miri have to do with it? 

“But we’re at the same company now and I-“

Kishibe picked up his drink and walked to his room “The next time I see him with you, I’ll put a bullet between his eyes,” 

Drama king, Asa thought

——

Asa slammed her door and rolled her eyes. He must be being old fashioned or something. It wasn’t like it was Miri’s fault. And yeah, something pretty bad could have happened. But it didn’t! 

She only felt bad that Denji found her. Apparently they all thought Asa was kidnapped or murdered… she didn’t know how she’d get over that awful shame. He looked so tired. Asa had never seen him that way before. When he saw she had woken up he immediately started lecturing her about seedy characters and the dangers of public transport. Yeah! From Denji! Asa had never been more shocked in her life. It was like the walk of shame coming home. 

Asa gripped a pink and lacy pillow to her chest. She could hardly stand not to scream into it. How embarrassing!!!

Surprisingly, Asa felt disappointed by the prospect of not seeing Miri again. Earlier she may have been overjoyed, but not anymore. Dancing with him the night before had been…

The way he held onto her left Asa weak in the knees and fluid like water. Dancing a pas de deux was not something Asa was well versed in. It was a dialogue. Different in every way from dancing in the core or as a soloist. Previously she had even been banned from it. Trust was at the basic core of a pas de deux, something Asa did not have in spades. 

But this time it was different. There was something there between them that felt like a silent but obvious connection deciding what to do next and how they could do it. Just by observing the many incredible pas de deuxs before her Asa tried her best to emulate them. Miri, who Asa knew specialized in the pas de deux, supported her like she was a pro, making her feel like he could hold her in a warm embrace forever. In his arms she felt beautiful, coupled with her giggly night full of actions so unlike herself Asa could feel some kind of thump of her heart. 

Oh danseur, true love? 

What am I in your arms? Youth?

I melt, I soften. 

Asa writes in a little pink journal, then locks it in the bottom drawer of her vanity. The silver key is nestled in an empty jewelry box. Realizing what she just did Asa groans and stuffs her face into her hands. Why did I just do something so lame?? 

He’s lame! Why am I- why do I- my feelings are-

“UGH” Asa really screams into her pillow now. “I’m just… lonely. That's all, it's not like I like him. I was getting into character,” Asa whispers mostly to herself. 

Asa waits across the street from Reze’s cafe. Her new balance 530’s scrape against the curb as Asa kicks at it. The sun is beating down today, summer not ready to go without a bang. The sticky summer sweat stagnates in the air, creating a sticky residue over the light makeup Asa practiced so hard at. 

The day after the haiku incident Reze came over for a girl’s sleepover. Kishibe encouraged her to get better friends, so Asa awkwardly attacked the friendliest person she had yet to meet. 

Never before did someone treat Asa so kindly and ignore the awkward stillness Asa could bring to the air. That day Asa bustled around dragging Denji behind her to the blockbuster video, 7/11, and downtown searching for ways to impress the cool girl. 

“I just don’t understand why I gotta come with,” 

“She’s your girlfriend isn’t she? I need someone who knows what she likes!” 

“G-g-girlfriend?!” Deji exclaimed

“Yeah, unless you’re still hung up with our boss twice your age,” Asa said with a pout. Should she have asked someone else? But who? 

“We’re not exactly…” 

“Just help me find some stuff she likes, Denji!” 

When she got home Asa prepared a movie night fit for queens, the short table was loaded with snacks and treats. Beside it the DVD player held a stack of films: Pulp Fiction, Perfect Blue, The Quick & The Dead, Whisper of The Heart, and other movies Asa thought looked cool. 

Beside each side of the table Asa neatly fold two futons, quilts, blankets, and pillows she found milling around. 

As the cicadas buzzed in the early evening the doorbell rang. Asa barely held back from running to the door. She had very carefully planned every aspect of ‘the first impression’ 

Sure Asa had met Reze before, but this would be their first time getting to know each other. 

Asa wore a light blue off the shoulder CAKE top and pink capri pants with lace trim. She begrudgingly put on a light layer of mascara, too scared to use the rest of the ‘my first makeup set’ her mother gifted her many years ago. In her hands was a big soft stuffed penguin and The Quick and The Dead‘s dvd selection page was buzzing on the television.

She quickly walked to the door, before freezing with her hand on the doorknob. The anxious nervousness which fizzed and bubbled up all day she realized had stilled. Through the little peephole Asa felt like she saw through a mirror. A mirror that produced the idealized version of herself. The sun was just creeping to the west haloing the beautiful girl at the door. A light but nervous smile played on Reze’s face, she also wore cute pajamas and held a pillow in her hand. A stuffed tote bag hung off her shoulder. 

From the way Reze shifted from one foot to the other and back again, Asa felt the tension in her body release. 

She opened the door “Welcome to my home,” Asa tried to smile. 

“Thank you for inviting me,” Reze lightly bowed her head

Getting settled Asa showed Reze the shoe cabinet, the spread before them, and the movie in the dvd player. 

“Wow, you really prepared such a nice night for us!” Reze said

“I um, I tried to get Denji to help me find some stuff you might like,” 

Reze turned her head to look at Asa with a wide smile on her face “It's perfect,” 

Asa felt blinded by the girl’s face card. The genuine excitement on Reze face had her belly feeling like it was full of butterflies, and a real smile passed her own face. 

“I have a gift for us!” Asa rushed up off the floor to her room grabbing two boxes. 

“What is it?” Reze called down the hall, 

Asa stepped over the blankets and pillows and handed the girl a box covered with wrapping cloth she usually put around bento boxes “Kishibe bought them for us, I don’t even know what it is. But I think he’s soft on nice girls,” 

The smile across Asa’s face didn’t come and go like a fleeting happiness but held on to Asa's joy. 

They unwrapped the boxes to find fluffy house slippers. “Is Kishibe home?” Reze asked “I’d like to thank him,”

“No,” Asa shook her head “He’s on a patrol or something I don’t remember,” 

After that it grew quiet as they switched on the movie and ate handfuls of snacks. Crambon wandered by halfway through A Whisper of The Heart the two girls oohing and awing over the kitty, before they theorized on Perfect Blue as Reze pulled out a big tub of makeup. 

“Shoo sweet Crambon, shoo” Reze gently pushed him away. 

Asa nervously scooted away as Reze menacingly held an eyelash curler and faux clusters in her hand. 

Late in the night, when the only light left the glow of the TV, Reze asked the question Asa was waiting for. 

“Do you like someone?” 

Asa then held her hand up with one finger over her lip. She retrieved the silver key and unlocked the bottom drawer of her vanity. 

When Asa returned with a small silver tin she whispered “Love is so stupid, do you know what people really want? Attention, or um connection,” Asa placed the tin box on the cleared table. She opened it to spread out a collection of photographs and playbills. 

She points to a photo of her company from when she was very young. “Thats me,” she points to herself, a little girl who no longer exists. 

“There on the left side is my father, he was a dance instructor. Beside him is Miri Sugu,”

“That was the boy who picked you up at the cafe!” 

“Yes, I have known him for a long time now. My father is dead. So is my mother, and I believed I would never see Miri again. I never thought I’d see anyone from my dance company. 

I- I never cared for Miri very much. I never even saw much of him. I wouldn’t say he was always better than me, and that's why we almost never danced together. But I led the core. I even played Myrtha once…” 

Asa remembered that very well. “The junior company typically had their own ballet every year that didn’t conflict with our small parts in the traveling ballet,” 

Reze held stars in her eyes “Wow,” she admired cutely. 

“We were always on the periphery of each other, until we were paired to dance together,” Asa bit her lip just thinking about it. “It was awful, I- I was so scared and it was like we had no connection at all, he-he didn’t even see me. He convinced me to do a lift, and the first couple times we practiced it it worked out pretty okay. But when we tried to do it more seriously I felt like a prop in his hands. I stiffened up at the worst moment and he dropped me,” 

Asa turned red just remembering it. 

Reze mouth slightly dropped. “That was his fault not yours!” She gripped Asa’s hand “don’t look so ashamed,” 

Asa smiled at that, finally someone said it was his fault. She shuffled to find the bright white photo of a pouting younger Asa in a hospital bed with a cast. 

“It's weird to have seen him again, but not bad. Not anymore. He can be annoying sometimes, but he’s kinder. Just as dumb as I remember. The other day I was so happy, I was so happy I didn’t feel like myself. I felt like if I dissipated into the air or melted into seafoam than that would be more accurate to who I was. I felt like that could happen at any second, but it didn’t. Kishibe was upset he didn’t walk me home, but that didn’t matter to me,” 

Asa whispered now “he looked at me, the last time we danced he really looked at me”

Reze only smiled a little smile. The kind of smile that is so soft and earnest it could put any single person at peace as gripped Asa’s hand tighter.

That was when she invited Asa and Miri to go to the summer festival with her and Denji. 

In front of Reze’s cafe Asa is grateful for the parasol above her head. The small respite of shade barely protects her but protects her nonetheless. Its warm when Reze skips out of the cafe.

Asa waves to her from across the street, as the two lock arms Asa places the parasol to partially cover the both of them. 

“You used the faux lashes!” Reze excitedly says

“I tried, I bet they look stu-“

“Stunning,” 

Asa thanks her. 

“Are you ready?” Reze asks

Asa nervously nods. Other than that they walk in silence. They find a part of the city Asa has only crossed in passing which houses many cultural sites. There's a large sign which reads Auntie’s Yukata and Kimono Rental. 

Inside busy groups of women check sizes and patterns, trying things on and being dressed by quick experienced employees. 

Asa bites her lip, is she really here to impress a boy? A boy who creates an unfamiliar special happiness but a boy nonetheless. 

Reze calls to an employee who quickly gets to work on the two young and pretty friends. Asa finds a powder blue yukata with forget-me-nots alongside other blue flowers peppered along the fabric. Around her waist is a well tied obi. They tie her hair into a curly side pony and compliment her makeup. 

Reze wears a bright pink yukata and a patterned obi. She also has an updo pinned with a large matching flower. 

Asa wears tabi socks, Reze doesn’t with their geta sandals. 

“Are either of you dressing up for a boy?” The kind employee dressing them asks. 

“Mm!” Reze hums “My boy is coming to meet us here around five,”

“Reze is way too cool for him,” Asa adds, shaking her head. 

“And you?” The dresser asks

Asa can’t help but lightly blush, “He’s supposed to find us after he gets off work, I hope he gets there before you leave me alone…” 

“I’m sure he’ll find you sweetheart,” the woman laughs “oh, I remember meeting my husband at a summer festival. I was so nervous, wearing a yukata similar to you now, wondering what he would think of me,” 

Loosening up Asa softly asks “How is your husband?” 

The woman’s smile mildly dims “He died, it was a long time ago. My son was lost in an awful storm, and when my husband went to look for him they were both lost,” 

Reze looks into the woman’s eyes as she leads the two girls to the cash register “I’m terribly sorry for your loss, however long ago it was,” the woman smiles a sad little smile which Asa can assume she’s comforted by Reze. Isn’t she wonderful? Asa thinks. Asa turns around as Reze takes her cash to spy Denji peering in through the window. Suddenly Asa doubles over laughing at his dumb face. Reze turns to and gives her adoring laugh. 

“Goodbye! Come again soon!” 

Asa cannot help being mesmerized by the girl beside her, Reze was electric. She was exciting. She was everything Asa was not. When Reze moved there was a shift in the air, the weight she carried reminded Asa of Kitri from Don Quixote. Kitri could command the attention of her entire little town and then some. 

Reze runs to Denji and wraps her arm around the boy. “Hey!” She greets. 

Asa follows her out of the building and her smile fades, she doesn’t know what happened but she can feel a disconnect between them now. Like Asa’s turn with Reze is finished. 

Denji’s face fades from bright pink to a light dusty rose and so does Reze’s. He reaches into his pocket for three deep blue tickets. Along the back is a graphic of a beautiful firework over a star speckled sky. 

“Have you seen Miri, Denji? Was he still busy with Makima when you left?” 

“Uhh, eh?” He just shrugs and his face grows pensive. The last couple days he had become lost in thought. The only time she could get a word in with the boy was when they sat down for their lessons. 

Asa rolls her eyes, then spots the telltale fin of Beam below the sidewalk. What's he doing here? Asa scowls and stomps on the fish, it looks awkward in her delicate yukata. 

“Hey-“ Asa starts to call but her voice fades as she thinks of the consequences of her revealing Beam. The fiend is expressly forbidden from being in public without a chaperone. I bet Denji forgot to check the shark back into public safety or something equally idiotic. If I tell them about Beam one of us will have to go back to public safety… the creature probably just wanted to follow ‘Lord Chainsaw’ around. 

…Asa definitely did not want to ruin Reze’s date by making Denji drop Beam back home, but Asa didn’t wanna do it! 

From her spot a couple paces away Denji turned his head to see her. Quickly, Asa decided they could ignore the terrifying shark monster. For now. 

Inside the festival she could hear the pulse of live music vibrating the large crowd. The smell of rich fried food permeated the sticky air. It was hotter inside, not just because there were so many food stalls nearby but because of the thick, alive crowd pushing and pulling all around them. Asa could see the nervous energy around Denji before he got the nerve to put his arm around Reze. Asa almost felt a surge of pride for her friend. Reze herself gripped on to Asa's hand. Together as a little connected island in the surging sea of people, Asa felt tied together. They were a part of something. 

The rest of the night continued on, she saw Miri’s tall and strong figure calmly gazing through the crowd before spotting her. His face lit up. His face lit up, Asa thought, for me 

She suppressed a selfish giggle. He definitely likes me, definitely He waved and rushed over. “Hey! Didja miss me too much?”

In the face of the real thing, after he hadn’t left her mind for so long, Asa opened her mouth and closed it. No words came out, but Reze let go of her hand. Asa turned to her and Reze gave her a not so subtle thumbs up. 

“No, not necessarily,” Asa said. 

“We were just about to go find something to eat!” Reze says 

“Gyoza?” Denji suggests 

They find a clear spot and together divide and conquer for a shareable spread of street food. 

“Thank you for the meal,” Asa softly says, only a little put off no one else does. 

Miri rolls his eyes at Asa’s pout. “So what's with the shark?” He blurts out with food still in his mouth. 

“ Shhhhhh!!” Asa and Denji both hiss at the same time, grateful Reze was still grabbing their drinks. 

“You saw Beam?” Denji asked Asa

“You didn’t properly take him back to public safety?!?” Asa cried

“That wasn’t my fault!” 

Asa just looked at him, this is exactly why she elected to ignore the issue. “I knew you’d be like that!” She glared then turned to Miri “Why’d you have to bring it up? Now one of us has to take him back,” 

“If anyone’s taking him back it should be Denji,” Miri says

“No way!” 

The boys started a petty argument over the stupid fish, as Asa gazed at the sky. It wasn’t clear like it had been depicted on the ticket, Will we be able to see the fireworks? She wondered,  the wind blew and just about every other second Asa could feel a cold plip plop against her skin. Rain was blowing in. 

Why would neither of them even acknowledge her presence? Asa expected Miri to look twice at her in the pretty blue Yukata, but he didn’t. She didn’t have such high hopes as to turn heads on the street like Reze, still without Reze with her Asa felt like the island they were in the big crowd, split off. 

“I’m going,” Asa stood up without her food, a scowl across her face. Nails seemed to scrape against her foot as she got up and stormed off. She could feel herself bump into the crowd but didn’t seem to care, stupid Denji, stupid Miri, it was stupid to have thought I could be like Reze. It was stupid to think I was charming or pretty or interesting. 

Denji notived her absence and laid back against the grass. That girl was so weird… 

“Where’d Asa go?” Reze asked with her arms full of drinks

“Stormed off somewhere,” Denji reached for a piece of takoyaki popping it into his mouth, “She always does this when she gets mad,” 

“How often is she mad at you?” Miri asks

Denji just shrugs, seizing the opportunity Reze reaches for Denji’s arm. She pulls him up as she says “you should go find Asa,” and hands Miri half the food in a plastic bag. 

——

It's been four hours since Asa stormed off, she definitely regretted that now. After the fireworks lit off all hell had come loose. Asa had found a nice spot to sulk under a large oak tree with many branches, branches that seemed to reach out into the sky, when she just barely spotted Chainsaw Man fly through the sky. First she wondered at his presence, second did she feel the wind come in. 

With the wind came gusts that blew the crowded festival goers into panicked stampede. Asa hair wildly blew blocking her vision, only allowing brief glimpses of the chaos around her. The sweat-sticky air dissipated into cold, harsh winds which carried rain like arrows piercing Asa’s skin. It picked up loose plastic tarps and the gifts and prizes from carnival games. It seemed to push against the people escaping, pelting them with thicker drowning rain. Just as Asa got a grip of her loose hair, branches of the great tree swung and cracked in the air.

She ran, not with the crowd towards the seaside exit but out into the festival where carts lifted into the sky. She ran through it all to crawl under a fence line and up into the city sidewalks and staircases. 

As she ran, Miri Sugo spotted that pretty blue yukata and chased after her. “Asa!” He cried “Asa!” But the wind didn’t push him forward away from the crowd and the exit but instead towards him. 

Asa’s mind let go of the festival and the worry she held for her friends, especially the cut up Chainsaw Man, and instead sunk into her memories of expensive first pointe shoes, a roof flying above their heads, and her fear. 

Asa kept swishing her head left to right, she didn’t stop the breakneck pace, she only kept moving to higher sturdier ground. As she reached the end of those high terrace-like parks and walking paths Asa saw the great terrifying blob of a head, brains exposed, surrounded by awful swirling clouds. Her breath picked up as she gazed at the interstate ahead of her. 

Where was she supposed to go? 

“Asa!” 

She turned her head, was that the wind? 

“Asa!” 

Where was it coming from? Asa quietly let herself stay facing forward, could another devil be taking advantage of the panic? No one else had come this way, and she had run a far distance from the festival. 

She didn’t know which way to go, she shouldn’t walk toward the storm… even a supernaturally manipulated one, but she didn’t want to return to where she heard the voice. 

“Asa!” 

At the third cry Asa elected to run. She ran diagonally back into the bush where a brush of trees peppered the highway. Despite being soaked, cold, and just a little muddy, Asa hadn’t yet torn the yukata. She hoped to keep it that way but when she tripped over a deep set of bramble she could hear the light tear of the expensive fabric, 

“No,” Asa softly hissed. With that Asa really started to cry. She didn’t like to cry, and she tried to keep the embarrassing action to a minimum, yet now like a bubbling brook the snotty gross tears poured out of her. As she cried she shook with the wind, her heart vibrated against her lungs making breathing feel like an intense effort. The beat of her heart hit against her sternum like a drum, it was so rough and painful. Barely through the woody and tangled branches of the bramble Asa saw the storm soak the outskirts of Tokyo. For a minute she thought she saw a shark-ish steed but decided to ignore it. 

She sat mesmerized by the living sky when arms reached out to wrap around her waist from behind dragging her out of the bramble. 

“Asa!” Miri cried like he had just found the holy grail. His hands tightened around her torn yukata. 

Hiccuping on tears “W-what are you doing? Let go Miri,”

“No,”

“Why not? Oh just let go already,” Asa desperately needed to get her heart out of trouble less it popped out of her chest, bloodying the yukata even more, this time not from great fear, but from the unrecognizable pit in her stomach. 

——-

oh thank god, Miri thought I found her

When Asa wrapped in his arms turned her head and looked up at Miri, the strange desire he held on again off again since childhood flared up like a chronic illness.

 Love that was what he had been diagnosed with. 

Tears, a rare sight, over Asa’s face glistened against her pouting face. Miri only wanted to hold onto her more, like she was a delicate bird he wanted to take home and take care of. 

He didn’t let go. 

“No,” he whispered softly as Asa stopped fidgeting. “Please don’t go, just for now, don’t go,” 

Chapter Text

They stayed that way for a long time. Asa shivered, and kept expecting something to happen, but also hoped that this moment could be frozen in time. Still, she was scared to look behind her in case something did. 

Miri was very close to her body, his arms softly wrapped around her waist. From the corner of her eye, Asa tried not to move her face, she could tell he was looking at her, she thought he was searching for the depths of her eyes but couldn’t tell exactly. What did he see? She wished to turn her head and see the expression across his face. She wished more for the wind and the rain to stop. But from the depths of her soul, Asa wished she could just rot into the bramble, so no one could look at her again. She wasn’t necessarily uncomfortable with Miri’s closeness, but she couldn’t help but think that Miri had to be out of her league. Why was he beside her now? 

Asa had to be thoughtful about her own breathing with Miri so close beside her. She did that for a long time. Relaxing her breath so softly it may have seemed she had drifted off. Her eyes slipped closed, but she didn’t feel tired at all. She was acutely awake. Acutely aware of the scratches across her arm and the cold pin pricks of rain against her bare skin, especially her shoulder where the yukata had promptly torn right through the layer of fabric. She was acutely aware of Miri’s warm chest and of his beating heart. She was not sure how long it was until the rain calmed and his breathing began to match hers. She turned her face. 

Only he wasn’t asleep as she suspected, his eyes were wide open. Finally getting a good look at the boy, his face was soft. His eyes seemed relaxed. Like Miri was content enough to stay in the muddy bramble with her forever. Now looking into his eyes, Asa was sure she entered an entirely alien interaction. Unconsciously she leaned closer. To get a better look at the soft boy in front of her. He touched her cheek. 

In Asa’s memory of that night she had never been sure who leaned in first, but without realizing it she received her first kiss.

_______

In the studio Asa worked up a sweat. La Fille had found a troupe of talented girls to get the show on the road alongside more than a handful of boys. Though she didn’t see them often as they were more partial to the gym. Among the dancers Asa could tell many were displaced like she was, many would mention a past company that had gone under due to a devil attack and the energy of the building would weaken. 

Still Asa found a schedule that worked for her so she could be in the studio nearly everyday. It was freeing. In many ways when she danced for public safety there was an explicit violence and competition to her dancing, but also effortlessness. When she danced Asa couldn’t feel the sharpness in her feet, she didn’t have to suppress the labored breath she felt rising up, and it didn’t matter to smile or include moments of musicality.

 That wasn’t her saying being a devil hunter was easy. Asa quickly understood her many limitations. 

At the dance studio, after pushing herself to the limits, working so hard to have each step appear effortless she collapsed in Power’s arms. The Hayakawa buddy duo picked her up while patrolling most days and she would join them. Patrolling with Power and Denji often grated on her nerves as they walked home with her, but it was also fun. 

“Eww,” Power said. Dropping the sweaty girl almost as soon as she caught Asa. 

Quick as a whip Denji reached his hand and pulled her up. “Jeez, can’t even stand?”

“…so tired…” Asa said. 

The weather in Tokyo was finally getting much cooler as of late. It’d been over a month since the Bomb incident. Despite only knowing Reze for a couple days, when Denji had told Asa she died in the struggle Asa can still remember the embarrassing display. She repeatedly asked him, growing increasingly hysteric why didn’t you save her? You’re Chainsaw Man, you should’ve saved her. Why didn’t you even try? What's wrong with you, you’re a failure. This is all your fault

Eventually Asa started to cry, not the soft and beautiful tears of barely contained fear but the ugly massive snot filled wailing of grief. Denji took it all with an uncomfortable guilty look on his face until she started to cry and he reached out to grab her around the shoulders and hold her close. 

When Denji did that, he couldn’t stop thinking of his absentee heart. I mean Reze did try to kill me, he thought. But I still wanted to run away with her… still he couldn’t cry like Asa did. He held Asa’s ugly crying face against his chest. Maybe she wouldn’t have cried if she knew the truth about Reze. But, it was Reze’s wish to remain a normal teenage girl in Asa’s eyes. Asa was an anomaly, currently the only woman who had never attempted to kill him. He thought about that often, and he wasn’t sure why. What compelled every woman he met to try and kill him? She was also the only woman in his life who he’d never wanted to have sex with. Almost the number 1 thing he thinks about and it had never come up around this girl. Was he being punished? For being horny?

 It was better not to think about it. 

On that fall day, Miri was very busy. Asa hadn’t seen her boyfriend for a couple days now because of some drawn out legal battle with Makima about something she ‘didn’t have the clearance to know about’ according to Miri. Still, Asa and what was left of division four was curious about the mystery. 

She usually saw the boy at early morning practices before she went on patrol with either Denji or Power, and she usually met up with him to eat together a couple times a week, but each time they met outside of the studio Asa quickly thought about what they could’ve been doing instead at La Fille. It was her one and only focus these days. Her work with public safety quickly suffered for it. 

Who who who

Power and Denji found a devil around the corner as they walked. It was a big one, one that Asa would not have the confidence to encounter on her own. “Hey! Evacuate the area or some shit, Asa!” Denji said, brandishing his ax. 

“Don’t get in the way!” Power cried already running after the monster. 

Asa nodded and did as she was told but could shake some uncomfortable feeling. She began to dance an Odette Variation which summoned the Swan Queen’s flock of maidens. These shadow clones of herself dispersed around the area warning passing civilians on the busy streets of Tokyo that it was about to get ugly. 

As she heard the crash and revving of an engine Asa couldn’t supervise the maidens anymore. She ran after Power and Denji. 

Through a rolling maze of alleys that lead deep into Tokyo’s concrete jungle, the devil she previously saw had grown past the size of a devilish pony to a colossal wooden horse. Asa pushed her way through the crowd just as Denji cut into the wooden thing’s glassy eye. Blood and pus immediately gushed out as he climbed into the thing. When the angry devil moved his glaring body Asa was frozen in fear. She shouldn’t be. She was taught she shouldn’t be. That moment in time waiting for Power and Denji to emerge every tool in Asa’s collection seemed useless. She remembered something Kishibe told her 

It was very early in her training, when Kishibe said “You’re going to be afraid. I am afraid. But when confronted with the moment that people need you, you will have to act,” 

But no one needed Asa at that moment. She could understand then that her comrades were much more powerful than she was. 

Who who who

In the now empty courtyard the Trojan Horse collapsed. As Denji cut his way out of the horse with Power following, the only sound that echoed and bounced around the courtyard was the cooing of a bird. 

Who who who

_________

Asa inspected herself in her vanity mirror. Using the faux little clumps of lashes Reze gave her hurt her heart so instead she bought a similar pack and used those. Asa leaned into the mirror and looked intently at each spot of her face. Her eyes looked big and upturned, but her nose had faded speckles of remaining summer freckles. Her hair was behaving for once, but she couldn’t do the hair she wanted so as to cover the white head on her forehead. Still, the side part was a hairstyle she tried on Power and liked a little less on herself. Her cami and long sleeve blouse sit alright, and she recently found the dark wash boot jeans in a bin at a thrift store. She was excited to wear them for the first time on a date with Miri. 

Just as she reached for the lipgloss, looking at herself with a slightly unsatisfied face, her phone rang. 

Asa didn’t typically use the soft pink cell for much, and half the time didn’t know how to operate it, but this time she knew it had to be Miri. 

She dug around the closet full of outfits she had tried on not even an hour ago finding the cell phone under a copy of ribbon magazine. 

“Hello?” 

“Asa! Where are you?” 

“What time is it?” She looked over to the clock on her wall “Sorry! Sorry Miri I’m still in my room I’ll run over right now”

Can’t wear those wedges now Asa thought

“Nah that’s fine I was a little late too, hey why don’t I just walk over to your house? Not like its far,” 

“Did you forget Kishibe doesn’t want you over,” 

“Oh yeah, why was that?” 

“It was cause of the first day we auditioned, remember? You didn’t walk me home,” 

She could almost see his cheeky smile 

“Oops,” he said

“I’m coming now,” Asa rolled her eyes, she had taken time off from practicing in the studio to spend the day with Miri. She practically lived a La Fille these days after the studio announced the upcoming ballet they would perform for a short run. It was a shortened version of a classic and timeless ballet that they already had the costumes and set pieces for. Asa was determined to receive the principal role. Whatever that may be. 

But she wasn’t so sure that Miri was. He often ditched class or came and practiced at odd hours when Asa was the only one around. She liked those hours practicing together the most however. When they didn’t need to talk but instead could feel warm and understood in the only way they knew how. 

Their instructor gave Asa a key out of the kindness of her heart. She was a very understanding person that Asa wanted to impress with her dancing. She could almost imagine walking into class any day now with the cast list before her. 

Despite running to meet up with Miri, that cast list was the only thing on her mind. She spotted him on the corner chatting with Denji, who left as soon as they looked up to see her. What was he doing here? 

“Hey,” Asa said, turning to look at Denji walking away “When d’you meet up with Denji?” 

Miri shrugged “Ran into him earlier,” 

“I’m sorry if I was interrupting anything,” Asa said, biting her cheek. 

Miri pushes off the wall he was leaning against and walks down the street Asa in tow “Nah, nah. So where’d you wanna go?” 

Asa turns her head, flabbergasted “I thought you had plans? You’re the one who asked me to hang out today,” 

“I just wanna go by the flow y’know?” 

“We could go to the studio,” Asa suggests 

“Again? I’m too tired,” 

A sour look grows on Asa’s face “The aquarium?” 

“Boring,” 

“Downtown?” 

“We’ve already been,” 

“Lunch?” 

“I don't get paid till next week,” 

Asa throws her hands up in annoyance “then why not the studio?” 

He shrugs, then a bright idea cuts across his face “Lets go to the library!” 

She rolled her eyes, I can’t believe this guy but when he caught her swinging hand her sour mood evaporated. His smile was bright, as was the sky against a warm sky. Without the sun it may have been too cold without a jacket but as it stood now they had escaped the thick summer heat. 

The Tokyo public library was a rather tranquil place full of rushing academics, calm, elderly men playing chess, and housewives with babies hanging on their hips and toddlers with picture books in hand. Outside were rolling soft green hills speckled with shaded flowery areas and courts for all kinds of sports. They held tennis courts, basketball courts, and a caged concrete rink for roller-hockey. Just then Asa wished her own sport was something that could be performed just because. Or to pass the time. When she looked at Miri, she saw a guy who made her heart flutter. But she also saw a dance partner, if an unwilling partner now. 

Exploring inside the library Asa kept finding cute mangas or cool magazines to show Miri, but the boy had made himself scarce. She finally found him deep into the dewey decimal system searching for cook books. 

“Boo,” Asa whispered to Miri. With a smile on his face and a collection of books in his hands he pecked her in the center of her forehead, just above the nose bridge and between her eyebrows. 

Each time he did something, like reach for her hand, kiss her just to kiss her, or express any form of casual affection… Asa wasn’t sure how she felt. Her first immediate reaction was one of disgust. These were things Asa previously judged harshly. In public when she’d see them she thought get a room. Now, it made her feel both special, pretty, and cared for as well as embarrassed. 

“Whatcha looking for?” 

That was another thing Asa unconsciously didn’t understand. There was this desire around him to look and act cute. She pursed her lips more and found the makeup tips from Reze insurmountably helpful. Whenever she realized how she was acting Asa reverted back into herself, but still couldn’t understand the weird insecure girl she could revert into. 

“Cook books, I’m gonna make us dinner one of these days,” 

“You can cook?” Asa looked at Miri with disbelief in her eyes. 

“I’m learning,” Miri said, proud of himself. 

They walked out of the library to find a nice and sunny spot. It was nice and warm. While lounging flipping through her magazines and Miri staring at the puffy white clouds above Asa said “If I’d known these were our plans I would’ve made us some bento boxes,” 

“Not that hungry,” Miri shrugged

Asa was quiet for a while. She watched a butterfly land on a little girl’s nose. As she looked out dejected, she saw so many happy families. She spotted one little girl with a slim father and a mother wearing a bun. That was how Asa’s mother used to wear her hair. When she was a child, she spent as much of her free time as possible in the studio with her father. Oftentimes Asa’s mother would drag them out for fresh air and a walk around the park. That was how Asa reluctantly learned to ride a bike, she spotted a young boy doing the exact same thing. 

It was warm that day, but only because of the sunlight. She looked over to Miri Sugo and how he was distracted. Thick bands wrapped around her heart, pressuring it into this painful suppression of tears. When Asa looked up at the canopy of trees with light barely shimmering down to them she saw there were one or two leaves with each tree that were developing beautiful golden hues. They were dying. 

Asa had to get up then. She tightly gripped her magazine and quietly began to walk into the sunlight where the park was peppered with families, the elderly, children, and teenagers in school uniforms. She became one with the crowd and Miri didn’t even notice. 

Just then she was glad she brought her baby blue duffle holding a change of clothes for the studio. She’d head there for the rest of the day. 

_______

Sitting in a circle with the odd collection of dancers Asa felt like a child again at the end of her first day of class. The nervous and excited energy reverberated around the room. The head of the company sat like that too. She was the center of everyone’s attention, and despite her age wore the same leotard, wrap skirt, and tights that the rest of the class did. While the woman didn’t usually instruct the class today she did and the head proved to them why she was at that position. She was incredible. Maybe not as good as Asa was, but incredible nonetheless. 

Their head of company waited until the instructor closed the door. Asa sat beside Miri waiting for the scene to unfold with rapt attention.

“Alright,” the head said with a giggle behind her voice, “I’m sure you’re all excited for our first ever show. I hope you all can enjoy it as much as we will. I also hope you all will have plenty of patience with us all upstairs, while most of the production pieces like costumes, set pieces, and stage crew has been assembled for us I’m sure we’ll find some bumps in the road,” 

They all nodded like children. There were a small collection of children with them anxiously waiting for the announcement despite knowing the younger classes already had their own shortened ballet to perform. 

Nana sat on the other side of Asa all smiles. 

“This winter we’ll be performing Giselle composed by Adolphe Adam” 

Asa clasped her hands together to keep herself calm. Yes, she thought. 

Nana quietly whispered in her ear  “What’s Giselle?” 

Chapter Text

Asa’s hand is sticky. 

Asa’s hand is sticky cause she neglected to bring hand sanitizer after buying Nana an ice cream. Why’d she even agree to babysit the little girl after practice? Why was Asa so nice to Nana’s single mother, Ume Fujino?

Despite her annoyance of the girl (mostly Nana's sticky fingers) Asa kept a tight grip on the girl's hand. The streets of Tokyo were busy and Asa would not have the little girl getting lost. 

Under her arm was a large tote bag, under Nana’s arm was another smaller one that she held onto tightly as they walked to the grocery store. Asa was planning on making Ume a large western meal when the busy woman got home, and that included buying all her own groceries. That meant finding the store in a calmer area of Tokyo not too far from the train station. She retrieved a cart with a seat for young children. 

“Can I ride the cart?” Nana asked a slightly mischievous smile on her face

Asa shook her head “You’re too big for the cart,” then handed her a bulleted list written on Hello Kitty stationary (Nana’s) “Just read me all the things we have written down. Be a big girl,” Asa said as she began to push the cart. 

Together they wandered the unfamiliar store to find pasta, garlic, tomatoes, various spices, meat, and bread. Nana excitedly read the list based on how easily she could make out each word. They probably lapped the store a couple times before familiarizing themselves with the layout. 

Asa finally plucked the mostly scratched off list from the child’s hand “Lemongrass tea? We don’t need that for dinner,” 

Nana looked up to Asa with cute pleading eyes “Its mommy’s favorite, we’re out,” 

Hit with a sudden wave of affection for the little dancer Asa turned grasping at her heart too…cute… she thought then straightened back up now composed. 

“Okay… where’s the tea aisle? Do you remember?” 

Nana shook her head. 

Asa and Nana joined hands again, resigned to trail the aisles once again. That was when Asa caught sight of their savior. 

“Aki!” Asa called, pushing the cart towards the devil hunter still dressed for work, dragging Nana in tow. 

“Hey Asa,” Aki said, hiding a little chuckle

“What's so funny?” Asa asked

“You’re just like me now,” his reluctant smile was dazzling. Like a refreshing shojo lead. “But what do you need?” He asked

“Yeah,” Asa shyly said. She now understood why the Angel Devil was always hanging around the hunter. Snap out of it! You have a boyfriend! “We’re looking for tea? Like lemongrass, do you know where it could be?” 

“Sorry, Asa you won’t find most teas here. I’d try this shop downtown,, here let me write you a map,” 

He opened his bag for a piece of paper and pen but Nana beat the older brother to it with her Hello Kitty pad and pink pen. 

“Thanks!” Asa said as she picked up Nana and threw her into the cart, despite what she said earlier, if they ran they could still make it in time to make dinner before Ume got home!

______

“This is wonderful Asa!” Ume says. The young woman’s beautiful face contorted into one of joy. Ume was probably around 25 years old (Asa was too afraid to really ask) and a manager at a local grocery chain. Without realizing it they bought groceries at her own store! That made Asa secretly very happy to double the giving towards Ume. Ume who had been so kind to her the past month after spotting the young girl crying in the lobby of La Fille. 

Asa hadn’t been able to control herself for days after Reze’s end. With all the crying she hardly felt like herself. But when Ume gladly heard her (simplified and shortened) story Asa felt like the fog she had been in lifted slightly. 

“But what's this flyer?” Ume asked, lifting a cutely designed symphony advertisement the girls had found at the tea shop. “ The greatest of Tchaikovsky ” Ume read “You’d love this Asa! Will you be going?” 

“I dunno,” Asa said, turning her head so Ume couldn’t see her face. How did she already know me so well? “Thank you for the compliment,” 

“The pleasure is mine! With how busy the store has been I can’t thank you enough for the help with Nana,” 

Asa looked over to the seven year old watching Sailor Moon. The little girl might have been growing on her. 

Ume held up the flyer again “Why don’t you check it out with some friends? I’d buy your ticket!” She said excitedly.

“No, you don’t have to do that,” 

“But I should! For all the help you’ve been, or maybe a boy will be paying for you,” Ume smiled curiously.

Asa shook her head, a rare laugh biting out of her “No, thank you Ume, but there is no need,” Asa took the flyer from the mother’s hands “I might go with my boyfriend,” she said shyly. 

“Wouldn’t that be lovely?” Ume snatched the poster “I should get in contact with this graphic designer, they could do La Fille’s Giselle!” 

Asa started to bring dishes to the small smudged white sink “If that could get some people to come,” she shrugged. 

“Definitely,” Ume smiled, pushing Asa out of the kitchen over to the nearby living room where Asa felt herself being pushed to Nana and a mug of lemongrass tea being offered to the two girls.

The apartment really was cramped, but Asa could feel the swirling of cleanly chaos and love. She had to say, however wonderful Kishibe had always been to Asa, she preferred the Fujino home. 

______

“Please,” Asa asked the boy in front of her, two tickets in hand. 

“But why me?!?” Denji said 

“Cause Miri said no,” Asa pouted “It’ll be fun though!” She started to chase him along their patrol route. 

“No wayyyy!!” Denji cried 

“Yes way!” Asa cried “Or- or” what could convince this boy? “Or I’ll tell Kishibe you’re in need of more training!” Without womanly charm, food, or material gain to sway Denji, Asa used the only other way she knew how: the threat of Kishibe.

He stopped dead in his tracks “You wouldn’t,” 

“I would,” 

He grumbled but walked back to his buddy for the day, snatching the ticket from her hand. 

“You don’t have anyone else?” He asked with a desperate pout on his face. 

“I asked Aki, but he’s busy that day, and I considered Power until I remembered, Power ,” she said sheepishly. 

“Fine,but you owe me!” Denji said 

Asa rolled her eyes careful to keep the desperately relieved smile off her face. “Do you own a tuxedo? I bet you don’t…” considered whether he would need one. Probably…? 

They’d have to go shopping. Asa took him  kicking and screaming to a collection of different shops, ranging from high end department stores to small mom & pops in search of the right outfit. She was grateful for the hazard pay they received as devil hunters then, it got expensive fast. 

“Are we done?” Denji asked, holding a large selection of boxes and bags. It was surprisingly fun to buy her friend clothes, not just things he would need to come to the symphony but clothes for the gym, casually, to work, or for school (if he ever went). She also bought things for herself that she was always putting off. It was so much more fun and less scary to ask for help from sales associates or find a dressing room with Denji beside her. 

Who who who

“If you really wanna, I can find a dress for the symphony later. It's getting late,”  

“Nah, you’re looking for that blue dress you want,” Denji and her sat down on the bench beside the subway entrance. Putting down all the bags between the two of them was a relief, Denji put his hands behind his back stretching. “If you really want to, we could check out one more store. If you really wanna,” he said looking out at the rushing cars passing to and fro along the street. There were so many people hanging out, doing things, having so many different plans that night. As Asa and Denji  sat and watched them, she considered what their lives were like, and she wondered if they were as happy as she was at that moment. 

Asa suddenly felt a deep melancholy submerge itself in the space between her heart and her lungs. “Yeah,” she said, “I’d like to check out one more store,” 

Asa stood up and gathered as many bags as she could from the bench. Denji followed suit and followed her down to a thrift store with a beautifully dressed manikin in the window. Asa had passed it many times walking the streets of Tokyo, but she had never gone inside. Maybe it was because the store had been a center point in her wandering, a place that Asa considered once she found it was time to head home. In her mind the store had become a place where if she just went inside anything that she desired, or anything that she had previously lost could be found. 

“There’s this manga that I read called Neighborhood Story . It's really good, and there's this girl who owns a really cute store. I’m always thinking that this is it. That this is Happy Berry. But I know it's not,” 

She told the boy next to her this from their spot on the street looking into the store window. Asa half expected that the store wouldn’t be open, saving her from the nervous energy that this was not Happy Berry. But inside the lights were on and Asa could spy small groups of people looking through the eclectic shop stuffed with all kinds of things.

Without her realizing it Denji had already opened the door for Asa letting the warm lamp light flood the darkening street as sundown descended into night. He walked in and Asa followed. Inside the shop there were many hardly organized shelves and racks full of clothes, trinkets, vinyls, tins, jars of jam, kitchenware, and just about anything else. There was also a lot of kitchy junk Asa couldn’t help laughing at with Denji. Within the warm lighting of the shop Asa found bracelets, charms, and an old jewelry box she couldn’t bear to part with. She tried on only a couple clothes, disliking the bulk of them and dug through bins. Still Asa couldn’t find her dress. 

Who who who

 A young girl about their age, probably a sales associate, with a short feathery bob walked up to them. She was beautiful, wearing a full sexy punk outfit “I’m about to close the store,” she said, “But if you guys are looking for anything specific I could probably help you find it somewhere around here,” her voice was monotone and totally bewitching to Asa. 

Before Asa could find anything to say, Denji spoke up. “Yeah, ’ya got any clue if you guys have like- a super formal blue dress? We really need one if we’re ever gonna get out of here,” 

The girl nodded “Follow me,” she said and showed them a wall of formal dresses that wrapped around a strange little hallway near the back of the store. She dug through ugly and beautiful, little and big, bright and pale dresses to find the slim silky white dress she held out in front of Asa. The wide straps spilled into fat tightly tied bows on the back side of the dress and Asa took one look before she fell in love with the long smooth dress. 

“Hey I said blue dress” Denji said before he saw the hearts in Asa’s eyes.

The girl produced soft blue opera gloves and a silver necklace with a blue charm hung off it. Without a word they were whisked to the checkout table where Asa would have forfeited all of her earthly possessions for that dress. The punk girl dropped in a freebie Milk and Kisses  Cocteau Twins cd and plopped them outside. The bag her dream-like dress came in was a very nice cotton tote bag reading: Horseman. 

The teenagers sat on the curb just outside the store deep in the heart of Tokyo. A motorcycle whisked past them bringing a chill breeze. Just then Asa was glad she purchased a warm, cotton sweatshirt with a fur hood in preparation for winter. Her uniform would have been pretty cold without it.

“I’m gonna get one of those…” Denji said wistfully after the motorbike. His tie had come loose with the number of times he took it on and off, no matter how much Asa insisted she would tie it. 

“You’d have to take a bunch of lessons,” Asa said gloomily. She was tired. 

“I could do that!” Denji insisted 

“Hmmm,” Asa hummed skeptically, “If you could ride that we wouldn’t have to take the train home,” she lit a cigarette. 

_________

Asa flexed her toes, she stretched each muscle in her body. It was the end of class, and just as everyone was siphoning out only a few grains were left. Nana was one of them. But so was their instructor who usually left early. 

As Asa determined it empty enough she went to the cd player in the corner of the room. Asa carefully lifted the cd from the player and into its case. She reached into her nearby duffle bag and pulled out the Milk and Kisses cd. She skipped a couple songs until she found one that matched the beat of something she would perform at final auditions. 

Asa found herself in the center of the room, surrounded by many mirrors. She spread out her hands and arms like a flower blooming. There is no shake or sign of tiredness from the long class, only an elegant precise movement. Every twitch of her body was deliberate. Every detail she added to the practiced variation was deliberate. She smiled wide, if she could keep every movement deliberate now, just for now, she would allow her face to escape its perfect form of grace into a fresh smirk of pride. 

She performed short jetes and long outstretched steps that portrayed her perfect long connected lines. 

The leftover girls and boys watched Asa. So did their instructor. Even those just taking their time to leave stopped to see her dance alone. In that moment Asa imagined herself as a glowing figure, yellow gold light reflected across space like a burning star. She imagined herself twirling through the dark only lit by pricks of stars and her own glow. Then, Asa didn’t feel like a forgotten soul but something the world revolved around. She enjoyed the feeling of knowing everyone was watching her. Her heart soured for the couple minutes she had their attention. 

Until the music faded to a close and she saw Miri in the doorway. She was tired, but the desire in her that drove her crazy to dance with the boy had to let him join her. She had to have him be with her then, holding onto her and letting her dance more. When she was with him all the light that steadily filtered out of her flickered up again. Asa felt that warmth again. When he reached out for her however, she looked straight into his eyes and she wasn’t exactly sure if Miri was happy. He smiled, and it wasn’t like he was upset. But Asa understood then that when he held out his hand, he wasn’t entirely sure if she would take it. 

Asa couldn’t prove it, but that moment, the wonderful pleasure she felt dancing with Miri dwindled slightly. 

___________

From where Asa stood, hardly five centimeters from the boy in front of her, she made good on her promise to knot Denji’s tie around his neck. 

Just then as her hands were busy, and she could feel Denji’s eyes looking down at her fluffy updo, Asa felt the urge to wrap her hands around his neck and squeeze. Surprised by her own thoughts, Asa lost the tension of the tie. It looked quite good by then until she had ruined it. She took a step back, and mumbled an apology. 

Asa had long curls framing her face beside her well behaved bangs that night, the rest was up in a difficult updo that had made her arms burn hours before she arrived at the Hayakawa apartment. She pushed them out of the way in her second attempt at the tie, which went quickly. She was glad to have practiced on Kishine the night before, the way her mother often practiced on her father prior to whatever fancy event they would go to. 

When Asa arrived she was a bit surprised to find Aki there, but he only said he would be leaving soon after they would. She didn’t wear her dress or shoes on the train there, opting to get dressed at the apartment. Then she was grateful for Aki allowing her to store her stuff where Power couldn’t get to them. 

Asa played the cd for Denji while they got ready. The deep blue three piece suit the two purchased earlier that week looked great on Denji, the pants were a wide cut with a slight flare, and the lighter vest was very well fitted to his silhouette. Asa was nervous if the black trench coat he wore over the suit jacket might match badly, but it didn’t and ended up looking fine. No matter how hard Asa tried, she couldn’t swindle Denji into a pair of loafers. So instead he wore blue air forces. 

Asa wore the dress they found at Horseman with a collection of jewelry over her blue opera gloves. She wore blue kitten heels and a fluffy white coat. Her bag, which held their tickets was a coach shoulder bag she probably paid way too much money for. 

Admiring her painted fingernails as she finished with Denji’s tie Asa looked up just before she heard the click of a chunky white camera. 

Aki was there reaching for the dark polaroid photo as it spit out of the camera. He shook it and Asa groaned. 

“You had to take a picture then?” She asked as Denji pushed past her to look at the faintly appearing picture. 

“Just wait until Makima sees me in this!” Denji said admiring the picture. In the photo he looked cool and nonchalant, so unlike himself. 

“Maybe use one without me in it?” Asa said, crossing her arms. Aki took another picture of the pouting girl and gave it to her. 

“Give that one to your boyfriend who couldn’t bother to make it,” Aki said coolly

“Oh do me, do me!” Denji said 

Aki shook his head.

“No way dumby!” Power said from her spot glaring from the couch, “I wanna dress up too!” She said

“You’d get bored after one minute Power,” Asa said, “Denji will probably fall asleep halfway through anyway,” 

Denji shrugged “No promises,” 

That was when Aki took a photo of Denji’s earnest smiling face. He shook it out then handed all three photos to Asa. 

“You guys should head out soon,” he said, “put those somewhere safe,” 

Asa couldn’t help the excited smile that spread across her face, “Okay Aki, thanks!” She said looking through her bag to see if there was any space for the photos. She found her way to the cd player and picked up the Milk and Kisses cd. The photos would probably be safe within the folds of the paper cd art within the case. She placed two of the pictures in there, and twirled the one of Denji between two fingers up at the boy from where she crouched beside the cd player. “Here’s yours, Denji. Show this one to Makima,” 

He rolled his eyes but stuffed the photo into his breast pocket. Just as the teens turned back one more time by the open door to say goodbye, Aki took one more photo and handed it to Denji. 

“Have a good night!” He called from the top veranda as Asa and Denji found their ride on the late night train.

“Thanks Aki!” Asa waved a big smile on her face “You too!” 

On the subway Asa felt like a poor princess. The train was packed oddly enough, full of drunk salary workers and it seemed like the remains of idol concert fans. Against the backdrop of tired droopy people Asa and Denji standing right next to each other seemed to glow more. 

Once they arrived outside the massive concert hall, Denji could tell they were on a classy side of town. A side of town he had never been in before, that exuded exclusivity. He could see a large chandelier through the thin rectangular windows and people crowded around a warm ticket booth. Inside there was a collection of young men who greeted each guest, took their coat, and led each couple to their seats. 

“Jeez,” Denji said as they sat in soft folding red chairs, “I’m glad you’re paying for all this…”

Asa frowned at Denji, “I mean yeah, it's pretty expensive. But you get paid more than me, Denji,” 

“Huh? No way,” 

“Yes way, you work more than I do. Plus you defeat stronger devils than I do. Your bank account should be through the roof,” 

“Eh?? No way!”

Asa rolled her eyes, and as she did the lights went down in the audience and up over the stage. She could see the orchestra fidgeting with their strings, and she could hear the soft whistle of final tests on woodwind instruments. A hush fell over the room, as did the stage. 

With all the people there the room was hot and Asa was glad she hadn’t picked a warmer dress. Denji seemed unbothered, boredly messing with his tie. Asa leaned over and whispered “Thank you for coming with me,” she just as quickly leaned back into her chair. 

“Oh? Yeah I’m pretty nice ain’t I?” Denji whispered. 

Asa couldn’t deflect that “Just try to stay awake? Please,” 

Denji didn’t respond to that, whipping his head to the stage as the first notes. How am I gonna make it through this? He thought I could kill the orchestra devil easily, ‘prolly just with the hatchet. Denji half wished it would show up but that’d make Asa pretty sad… ruin the clothes we looked all over town for too

He looked over to find the girl mesmerized with the stage. Denji had never seen someone so focused and intent on something so boring. The music was, Denji didn’t know exactly, good? He knew he’d never produce a sound like that. But, he didn’t see anyone nearby in the darkness with eyes for the harmonies like Asa. Well not exactly. As Denji watched Asa he could tell her eyes were glazed over and her ears were peaked. She had disappeared really, to go somewhere Denji didn’t understand, but he wanted to. Badly. A time passed and everyone began to clap and exclaim, Denji hadn’t even noticed the song ended. Another began and so did another set of watching Asa. 

It was weird. Denji watched the girl, without paying mind to the loud strong music that left vibrations pulsing the air. Denji found his tense body relaxing as Asa leaned at the edge of her seat. 

She seemed to be at the edge of something and about to leap off. Denji leaned over, so he too would be sitting like her. She quite literally was about to fall off her seat, so Denji took her by the gloved hand and made her lean back. “Don’t go falling off the seat,” he whispered without letting go of her hand. Neither did Asa. 

Soon after that, Denji fell asleep. He had a great nap until Asa woke him up to an empty theater. 

“You did fall asleep,” she grumbled 

“Eh? I bet you didn’t even notice,” he stood up from the folding theater chair and brushed off, “Let's get something to eat!”

“But I’m so tired,” Asa said, hardly keeping her eyes open. 

They meandered into the lobby which was slowly clearing out. People gave tickets to busy workers for their coats and various administrative members came out to meet high profile guests. By the closet doorway Asa and Denji stood in line for their coats when Asa spotted Ume carrying a sleeping Nana. 

“Ume!” Asa called walking out of the line to greet her. 

“Asa you came!” Ume whisper-shouted, “I’m so glad you got to come, wasn’t it lovely?” 

Asa nodded, grateful someone also appreciated the show. 

“Is that your boyfriend? He’s cute all dressed up! Did you go shopping?”

“No- he’s not my boyfriend,” Asa tucked her hair behind her ear. “My boyfriend had work tonight, so he couldn’t make it. I had to beg Denji to come, so now we have to find somewhere to eat…” 

“Well you both look radiant. I’m headed straight home, but why don’t you guys Death By Sushi? It's open all night,” 

“Sushi sounds great!” Denji said with his trench coat over one arm and Asa’s white fur over the other. 

“Nuh-uh I hate fish,” 

Denji groaned “What do you wanna eat? You shot down all my ideas!” 

“I dunno! Uhh fruit, that's what I’m craving. Fruit,” 

Denji looked at her incredulously, “Where do you go to just eat fruit?” 

“Lets just go home,” 

“No way, you promised we’d get dinner,”

“You already had dinner before we left, just have a snack when you get home,” 

“Nah I wanna check out Death By Sushi,” 

Asa groaned getting increasingly loud “why don’t-?”

“Let me just drive you somewhere!” Ume said with a smile across her face. “Insomniac Cafe, it's got all kinds of stuff. I’ll take y’all there,” 

They found the cafe surrounded by bars and nightclubs and were dropped off with a few thousand yen Ume insisted they keep as backpay for all the babysitting Asa did. 

“Thanks Ume!” Asa said, her eyes still soft and slipping. They sat across from each other in a puffy blue booth. As soon as they sat down Asa resumed her nap from the cramped car. She slid the money across the table to Denji, he could figure that out. 

The soft yellow lamps illuminated the cozy corner of the after hours cafe. It made it easy to ignore the tables full of drunk couples or exhausted salary men. She easily slipped into a foggy half awake state where Asa vaguely understood that a waiter came to take their order and Denji ordered a ramune and fruit parfait for her, a deli sandwich and rice balls for himself. It was warm in the cafe, but Asa couldn’t bring herself to take off her fur coat. She could hear the soft jazz and far away mumble of people's conversations, only vaguely though, as if they were in a different room than Asa. 

She was vaguely aware of the way Denji rested his cheek in his hands and looked down at Asa. The sleepy girl imagined it was a similar sight to seeing Denji slumped over in his theater chair. When their food came the boy popped the little clear marble into both of their drinks and blew a rolled up straw wrapper into her face. She looked up to see a hulking parfait in front of her and Denji stuffing his face. 

She tried the parfait, and realized how hungry she was then. Asa scarfed it down with the fruit and the ramune to wash it down, Denji laughed in her face. 

“You eat faster than me! Haha,” 

Asa glared at the boy but didn’t say anything. She took the pins and rubber bands out of her hair letting the black curls pool around her face. Asa let her eyes droop and her head fall into her thick hair. 

Denji poked her awake,

“Noooo,” Asa groaned “five more minutes,” 

“We gotta go home, Asa,” 

Asa glared at him. She sighed and then pulled herself in her too warm coat outside with Denji. 

He clasped their hands again and led them to Aki’s apartment. 

_______

Who who who

The first descending notes of Serpentskirt played through Asa’s headphones calming her erratic heart. Miri leaned against the La Fille lobby door watching Asa stretch. He wore black tights and a black well fitted shirt, the dark colors made his skin appear paler than milk. While Asa wore a white leotard and pink tights. Her black hair stood out like an inkstain against the white floor she stretched on. Surrounding the two were many other very similar dressed dancers preparing for the final audition. 

I’ll know today, Asa thought, I’ll know today if I deserve Giselle. 

“You know you’ll be playing Giselle,” Miri said casually. 

“Not exactly…” 

“Nah you have to!”

Asa considered his vote of confidence, and tried to calm herself. She replayed Serpentskirt . The song really did make her breath feel deeper and her beating heart less rough. 

“Thank you, Miri,” she said 

They leaned against one another, until each was called into the studio’s wooden floor room surrounded by mirrors where classes took place. They already finished the group audition where everyone stood in ordered rows and performed what was ordered of them in perfect timing and rhythm. 

When Asa was called into her solo audition all the nerves bundled around her heart dissipated and she easily calmed. Her variation went off without a single hitch, and Asa couldn’t even tell you a single step she performed. 

She had been one of the first to give their solo audition. She also seemed like one of the few who left with a smile on their face. Even without the ballerina devil, Asa felt like after practicing the steps without a chance of fault, Asa could replicate that artistry and perfection on her own. 

When Miri Sugo’s name was called, Asa squeezed his hand and smiled at him. Wordlessly encouraging the boy to do his best. 

Soon after then a huge sea of people began to crowd the streets outside. From the second floor lobby Asa could see the stretch far out into the horizon. She perked up then, and paused the cd player. The crowd bobbed and rolled like waves around some central circle. Far off, Asa couldn’t tell what that was, but as it paved its way closer and closer to La Fille Asa could see the deep, dirty red and fleshy pink blur it made. Asa perked up and noticed that in the smallest cracks between people that same bloody fleshy color remained. 

She spied bits of people, arms, eyes, crushed legs, and heads stomped in like pumpkins beneath the soles of the crowd. Soon she was joined by the rest of the waiting dancers peering out the floor to ceiling windows. 

“Everyone stay inside,” A strong voice Asa didn’t realize was her own calling out to the dancers orderly waiting in the clean sunny lobby. “No one even head downstairs. If someone is coming to pick you up, call them and tell them not to come. Public safety will arrive soon,” She began to pull the soft cream colored blind sheets down. 

Asa looked to the small crowd around herself, afraid of the one growing outside. Her voice shook when she told them, “There is a devil outside,”

Chapter Text

Should she go out there? Should she call someone? I wish Miri was outside… she thought. 

Still inside with their instructors and directors Miri was still performing his audition. With him out of the running Asa dug around her small pink duffle for the cell phone that was once her mothers. Red gemstones littered the thing from when Power had gotten it into her head to bedazzle  it for her. She flipped it open and called her most recent contact. 

After a few rings the voicemail rang out “Yo this is Denji! AKA the awesome super cool Chainsaw Man himself- uhhh I’m probably fighting a devil or some shit I’ll call you back,”

Shit 

She tried to remember Kishibe's phone number and typed it into the keypad. He picked up quickly “This is Kishibe,” he said dully over the soft fuzz of the cell. 

“Sensei! Hey, hey this is Asa,” oh this is so embarrassing I sound so nervous!  Asa thought. “Do you remember where the studio is? La fille?”

“Yup,”

“Well there is this devil right outside, and I know you’ll probably tell me to go deal with it myself but I think its this kind of crowd devil maybe? I’m nervous if I go out there I’ll just get stampeded. Can you come or send someone maybe to come help us out??”

She could almost feel his exasperated sigh through the phone “Yeah you probably can’t handle that…Someone should come down soon I bet, but until then I want you to keep everyone in your building inside and go out with Miri. He’s an idiot but I’ll bet he could be some help,” 

Then he hung up! Without saying goodbye, what an asshole, Asa thought. She then quietly opened the door to the studio. She waved over Miri and filled him in on the situation. 

Asa realized then she had never seen Miri at work, or in the line of duty at all. He seemed sorta… excited in a weird way. It wasn’t weird that he was excited, but odd how he came across. 

“Alright! Are you ready for this?” he said looking at Asa smiling. She noticed his body shook, not the kind of way you did preparing for a race so eager to hear the gun go off- but the way someone would take a steadying breath to ease their nerves. Asa nodded with her lips pursed. 

At that quick as a whip Miri opened the door and popped off his wrist the same as a weak magnet. There was little bloodspray to transition into a smooth split through his arm to form two longswords. Asa stepped back on instinct. She immediately compared it to the Chainsawman’s transformation which was sickly gross and gory. This reminded Asa of the way a sleek white knight unsheathed a sword upon his stead. With one swing he cut through the crowd and pushed his way into the throws of the crowd. 

____________

What squirmed and slid and closed up all around the boy reminded Asa vaguely of the zombie devil. Only the bodies crushed and pushed and pounded against each other now weren’t blue with sickness and death. Each body was hot and red against the next like the sheer heat of the crowds could cook them alive. It reminded Asa of the natural phenomenon where bees protected themselves from intruders by crowding the intruder and covering it with their own bodies until the bug would get so hot it died overcooked. 

Asa felt her heart rate pick up as the crowd attempted to swarm her and the door. She didn’t let them, plunging herself into the hotheaded but short performance of The Firebird. She let them follow her. Just then thinking of the small, ugly beaches not far from this area of Tokyo. If she could just get them out of the city… 

The story of The Firebird is based off of the Russian folktale of the same name, where the hunter Ivan follows her into the enchanted forest where he meets an evil sorcerer. Ivan chases after The Firebird to find thirteen princesses under the control of the sorcerer, later, after capturing and releasing The Firebird, she returns to help Ivan destroy the sorcerer and release the prisoners so that Ivan can marry the princess he has fallen in love with. 

Like a twittering bird hopping from place to place Asa danced playfully tempting the horde to follow her. With each hop and step she fluttered further just out of reach eventually landing them upon the board walk. As she lets the lithe movements of her body lead her to step one porcelain foot upon the wooden pier she realizes then there is less than a foot of space left between her and the crowd. The sheer number of people then gazes past her as she realizes the variation was finished minutes ago. The music and audience of her domain has disappeared and the mob now looks nervously at the horizon. 

Within the crowd now descending all the way off the pier onto the boardwalk and surrounding dirty sandy area still lies the red hole. The red hole which stampedes and crushes everyone trying to avoid its path. Asa can spy the long collection of blades the crowd shivers to avoid as well chasing after it. 

She takes an unbalanced step back falling off pointe as the woodwinds whistle to a stop. Regaining her grace she steps back again. 

What other variation does she know? How can she get back into her deep dark auditorium? 

But now looking at the people tired and still writhing she realizes there is no way off the pier. No, the only way is into the shallow water they are sure to follow her into crushing her. Even worse, Asa couldn’t exactly call herself the strongest swimmer. She stepped back again. Letting her soft slipper shoe slip against the wet wood. Asa tried to regain her last grace as she took off down the narrow dock. 

The only thing on Asa’s mind are the sharp and dangerous steps before her. The pier is long and goes far far out into the water, she pays close attention to every step she takes as she barely struggles not to trip or get caught against the built up barnacles and natural divots and grooves of the wood grain. 

As she runs so does the crowd, slowly, slowly, out of the corner of Asa’s eye she spies the body of desperate men young and old. She spies mothers holding children. She gets a clearer look of one young man. No. No no no. The young man in creased red blood soaked jordans and a desperate spirit in his eyes comes into clear view. As do the salarymen. As do the tourists. As do the schoolgirls.

As does the shoe that stomps over her head. Wood burns against her bare skin. Flakes dig into her fair skin. She breathes in and smells the strong thick scent of iron, and red red red, everyone's shoes are caked in it. Dried bits cling to their legs. She can feel something drip through her hair as the red hole opens up only ten- maybe fifteen feet away from her. It swallows up a corpse, a lost shoe, someone's skull as it reaches for whatever it hears cry out next.

There is still a loud painful pounding upon her as Asa attempts to cover her head. She finds her way to the edge where wooden rails keep the stampede in and keeps them from shoving people into the water. Well, not too many people. Some lose their balance and tip over or are caught and rubbed raw against the wall of people and the rails. 

Asa clings to the poles at the edge and finds sanctuary for her head. She shimmies herself further between the rails so only her legs have been left on the pier. 

Asa’s body bends like an L shape over the side. Her feet hurt but they always do, so she doesn’t mind that as much. She tries to pry them towards the rails. She gets one. Two…? At this point her entire body has nearly escaped the crowd she now spies jumping into the freezing water. As if they were a waterfall. Still she can almost feel the red spot that sucks people in nearing her, circling itself from the top to the back to the middle of the crowd. 

Asa’s left leg is caught on something. When she pulls a soft thunk unlocks and locks her knee. Let me go please please just let me go. As her pleas soften out through her head to a constant whir, whatever has stuck against her releases. And so does she into the drink. 

Under the depths it's a shock of cold. A sudden contrasted cold from the heat of people’s bodies pushing and pulling at one another. As she fell  she landed in a ball so as to twirl in the water. 

The salty sea gets up into Asa’s nose as she swims, barely keeping herself from sinking like a rock. Which way is up? she wonders as her body curls up again looking for comfort, and like suddenly fallen out of a dream-

Splunk 

By the thick black curls peppered with bobby pins from a destroyed bun she is plucked out of the water. She spits out water (it seems to be leaking from every orifice of her face) and looks up almost into the sun, where haloed by the morning star Asa spies the shark teeth of Denji. 

Against her own wishes she stares at him in awe and tightly suddenly grips her arms around his neck letting her entire body relax against him. 

Denji can feel the light weight of the girl against him, it shouldn’t be- but almost only by the way her heart beats so loud he can feel it on his own skin she is a weight he is grateful to carry. 

Just then she scrambles away “Sorry! Sorry, sorry,” Asa says red in the face "Where's Miri?” 

He shrugs and points toward today’s ‘hero’ surrounded by a couple different reporters. Around them multiple people swim to the shore and disperse. It seems while she was stuck under the crowd the devil had been taken care of. 

Asa has a sigh of relief, but doesn’t try to find her way to him. 

“Sorry I didn’t pick up your call,” Denji shrugs as they both gaze at Miri. 

His sad little face smears a smile across her face “Are you jealous?” she laughs walking over with Denji to the hero.

“Duh, why don’t I get to do interviews!? Babes on the street would love me then,”

“Whatever,”

He rolls his eyes at her, and waves his hand “Miriiii,” he cries “Lets grab sushi!” 

Miri spies them and a real smile catches across his face. He runs over and wraps an arm around Asa. She lets a relieved breath leave her, grateful nothing happened to either her or Miri. I mean, we still have Giselle to put on. 

__________

It's cold in the arcade. Asa tries not to make a huge deal with it. She wears a blue fitted collared shirt and short skirt, with winter rushing into Tokyo she thought just wearing sheer tights and knee socks alongside the thick peacoat she owned would support her through the warm morning but as the day went on the wind outside only picked up. 

Right now she really should be watching Miri on Dance Dance Revolution instead of staring at her black flats. He’s quite good at the rough and sharp steps the machine instructs. Earlier she had been competing against him (and losing) before a long and skinny guy approached the machine. His lithe body is swallowed up by the wide jeans he wears and big shirt that has the words RIP TUPAC across the front. They both get a hang of the rhythm in a way Asa could not, she kept trying to smoothly transition one step to the next with a grace that this style didn’t require. 

Really, she’d rather if the two were in the studio. After getting the leading parts two months ago she had to admit she just about locked the two up in there. Still today was… relatively fun when Asa got her workaholic tendencies out of her system. 

Despite feeling a little awkward she gets on to cheering Miri on against the experienced Dance Dance Revolution player. Of course her boyfriend wins. 

He jumps off with a bundle of tickets in hand, “Okay! What's next?” 

“Umm” Asa puts her finger to her chin trying to think what haven’t they done yet? “The racing games?” 

“Woohoo! Consider today won by now,” He looks rather proud of himself “What is it? 300 to 250 tickets?” 

Asa grips Miri by the neck pushing him down so their faces are on the same level “Not for long,” she says and runs over to the stationary motorcycles. They’d already completed the cars and snowmobiles on their quests to complete every game across the small city arcade. The shibuya arcade they had mapped out wasn’t the biggest in the area and wasn’t the one with the best games but they had discovered the busy little place had the best prizes by far. 

Asa had her eye on the large curly kitty plush for 500 tickets, Miri had his on the Berserk Guts figure. There were a bunch of little details across the figure that made its price point of only 650 tickets one of the most expensive(but worthy) options. 

The couple slotted their coins into the motorcycle game and began customizing their bikes. Asa created a sleek white bike with cherry blossom prints across the side. It had pink headlights and heart shaped rims, what was wrong with making such a feminine bike? 

Miri compiled himself a deep blue bike with butterfly decals. He finished long before her, stressing his girlfriend to just get to the race already.

“Okay, okay which one do you wanna play?” Asa asks a bit of a scowl on her face turning the bike handles to each different race track. 

“Let's do… The Vegas Strip?” 

She hardly hid a smirk “Yep!” Quickly selecting the track and revving her motorcycle. 

“Woah gimme a second,” 

He didn’t know, but Asa strategically chose the motorcycles as their last game for a reason. While with the other racing games she won in the snowmobile and lost in the car Asa’s most skilled game was the motorcycles. Whenever she scoped out arcades with Miri she did play the motorcycle more than any other game; he was typically too busy with the Dance Dance Revolution to notice. (He was really good at that rhythm game). With Denji and Power however the trio basically puppy guarded the bikes staying on them for the entire trip. Within that trio Asa had to admit, she wasn’t as skilled as Denji, or as competitive as Power, but what she did have was experience. She knew every track inside and out. The Vegas Strip? A semi-difficult route of high traffic with low visibility. Asa had mastered it years ago. 

They walk out with a huge kitty plush in Asa’s arms. Sure, she’s a little embarrassed that people turn their heads to look at the odd couple. Miri: disgruntled and Asa wearing a funky smile. She wants to get out of the large crowd, and tells Miri this. 

Miri nods, and blushes slightly before looking away. Cute 

“Do you wanna drop by the studio?”

He struggles to keep an annoyed groan quiet. He ignores the bright blush across his cheek as he asks “Do you wanna go to a hotel with me?”

_________

Asa should not be here right now. Asa should be preparing for Giselle opening night which is happening in two days. The original reason she called Miri. 

Instead her face hasn’t lost its uncomfortably hot redness in the last half hour she followed behind him, and somehow ended up on this funny heart shaped bed with a lace bed skirt. Miri wasn’t there with her yet, he said he had to run to the front for something. Something Asa wasn’t paying attention to. She probably should have been. 

How did I end up here? He asked her to go and they went but Asa obviously hadn’t thought this through before following him there. Asa had let the boy take her self control like a loose ribbon she wasn’t too careful with. She even told Kishibe she was staying with a friend for the night. 

Asa had never considered this turn in her relationship, not even thought twice that he may have desired her. She couldn’t imagine herself thought of that way. When he comes back she should tell Miri to call it off, Asa would tell him she was sorry for messing with him and would pay him back for the room. 

It was dark inside the room, only lit by weak soft yellow light. The floor was smooth and cold against her bare porcelain foot. She shouldn’t be doing this. It's not like I’m being a slut Asa thought tons of people have sex with their boyfriend. Then why was she so nervous? The thought of ‘doing it’ didn’t fill her with disgust like pda, and she had even fantasized about an encounter like this before with Miri. Only- it didn’t exactly look like this. 

In her fantasy it was a lot more tender than a hotel room. 

But in her fantasy Asa also didn’t feel the tell tale sting of pleasure below her belly. Or the intense curiosity. 

There was a mirror thankfully in a different corner of the room where Asa took a good look at herself. She popped off each button of her shirt and folded it nicely revealing the plain black bra. Her socks and tights rolled off easily only leaving herself in the daring black thong she recently bought. Asa turned and admired her lithe body. When she pressed against her skin she could feel the soft plush of fat over smooth muscle. Her ass, the place mean dance teacher said they could see her lunch, looked good in the thong- at least she thought so. It was hard to see in the dark lighting. 

Asa brushes her hands through her hair- before deciding not to mess with it. Just then she could hear the softest thud of steps against the hard floor. She sat on the edge of the bed. Then got cold and put on the I 🩷NEW YORK sweater from her bag. 

It was Miri so he would be kind to her right? 

———-

Miri always knew this couldn’t last very long. It wasn’t like a sure fact in his mind- but instead a premonition from the first time he kissed her. Every minute he spent with her somewhere inside himself he knew she could disappear like water between his hands. 

Everytime he held her it was difficult to let go, and every time she looked up at him-to roll her eyes or smile or scowl at him he wanted to hold on a little longer. Maybe she sensed it too and was why the only thing she wanted to do was dance together in the studio. Sex was kind of like a dance. More wet and delicate but a dance nonetheless. 

Miri wasn’t entirely confident with the girl he couldn’t let go of- movies and porn made it look so easy but in the moment he knew he couldn’t fuck it up. It wasn’t like when he had done this before. He tried to prioritize Asa, to savor the hot twisted look on her face, and to listen to her. Honestly he’s not sure how successful he was pounding into her after she became a limp moaning mess in his hands. 

Still early in the morning when that dark room’s pink sheer curtains let in soft dusty light Asa straddled his waist and balanced herself with her two hands pushed hard against his chest. She leaned in so her wet lips touched his ear. “Do you love me?” She whispered. 

In the moment he didn’t know that long drawn out pause was the end of it all. 

She got off him biting mad and began dressing- back into the short skirt and thick white sweater.  

“Hey what are you doing?” Miri asked hardly awake 

He could see her bottom lip quiver “so do you think I’m some slut?” She asked desperately, buttoning the wide buttons of her peacoat and slipping on her black ballet flats. Without the tights she had worn yesterday he could clearly see her soft downy leg hair he had gotten to touch and caress before laying her down onto the bed last night. 

“No! I didn’t-“ 

“Were you just using me?”

The fuck? Miri thought

“Asa stop, you’re jumping to so many conclusions,” 

Asa knew then she was being unreasonable and emotional. She lit a cigarette.

But she couldn’t shake something that was wrong. So close to each other Asa didn’t feel any strengthened connection between her and Miri. She could tell there had to be something, anything that had spoiled the satisfaction she had woken up with. But she didn’t know what. So Asa asked again. 

“Do you love me?” 

Again he was quiet. 

She shoved the neatly folded clothing into her Horseman bag and almost made it to the door. Miri gripped her by the arm just as she caught his face of complex emotions in the mirror. 

Asa turned and asked again accusatory “You used me,” 

In the moment Asa hadn’t even considered his feelings, only her own pleas for him not to stop. Not to take away that hot addictive feeling. It was like the first time they danced together at La Fille. Something she never wanted to end. But now she did consider what floated into his mind. Does he love me? Why did he want to have sex with me? 

Why when he reached out for me- and danced with me- and been with me- do I still feel this distance between us? 

“I didn’t use you!” He scoffed, (or in his retelling exclaimed) “Its not like you don’t use me too,” 

“For what? For what do I use you for?” Asa (in her telling) exclaimed. 

“Dance! Dance obviously you stupid lovely idiot. What else have you ever looked at me for?” There’s something behind his eyes Asa has never seen in him before. She doesn’t think that it's the truth, or desperation, or love, but she thinks it's simply sadness. He looks defeated.

“Why are you like this? Why is this the only thing that matters to you is if we dance and for me it has to be you? Can’t you see that? That I’ve only done it for you?” 

Asa can’t think of anything to say to his admission. Her mind has gone blank to anything except that what Miri said was true. The boy had given her attention and an important tool for many different performances. Even performances just for herself. But had she ever known or understood him? 

She’s sorry. I’m sorry she tries to telepathically communicate through the pained look on her face. Asa had hurt him. She took an inhale of her cigarette, and she tried to find something to come out of her mouth other than smoke. His hand was still tight on her arm. 

Miri noticed her eyes were the same as the night before. Just like the night before he savored the way her eyes turned and looked at him almost adoringly. 

Asa shook him off her hand and left the building almost at a run. 

Chapter Text

Asa let her thick collection of pillows and blankets bury her after she got home and showered. She barely peaked her head out to turn up the CD Player blasting Fleetwood Mac. 

Why did I do that!?? Asa thought struggling to escape the uncomfortable replayed memories of the past day and night Why was I with him in the first place? Was it- was it really just because I wanted attention? 

I’m so stupid, I should never have thought I could really be close with another person. No one could ever understand me. 

A loud thundering knock echoed through the music “Hey, Asa” she barely heard Kishibe say, she turned the music down “Listen I know you were out with Miri all night, and I know you didn’t tell me cause I don’t like the kid,” 

He sighed and if Asa listened closely she could just barely hear the sound of a small tin knob twisting on and off. On and off went the cap of his flask. 

“I just want you to know Asa, that if you want to talk to me you’re welcome to,” and he left the door. 

She let the music play. Asa let herself feel the weight of the warm blankets and pillows and quilts on top of her. She curled up.

____________

It might surprise you how getting ready in the morning could bring a girl relaxed peace in five to ten minutes Asa thought as she stripped down to her underwear. In her naked body she could see no difference in herself from before and after losing her virginity. 

Why did she think there should be? 

When she walked into class beside all the other girls they wouldn’t notice. If they did, they wouldn’t care. 

Maybe she should just let it all go. She just about owed it to Miri to break it off cleanly. I thought I loved him, she acknowledged. Yet… had I ever especially cared for him outside of the studio? 

When Miri couldn’t go to the Tchaikovsky concert with her did she care? Not particularly. 

Each day they spent together reflected across Asa’s mind as she rubbed rose smelling lotion across her body. She picked out light washed boot cut jeans and a smooth black tank top under a cardigan wrap she may have worn for class. 

She imagined what he may have been thinking at the festival, outside the library, and any number of other places they were together. Asa washed her face and let those thoughts drip off of her like the water. She wore light makeup and stuck her tongue out as she carefully attached little clumps of faux lashes to her eyeline. 

Today was the final dress rehearsal before their first production of Giselle. She let her excitement for the day overcrowd the nerves she had for seeing Miri again. 

When she emerged from her bedroom she found Kishibe relaxed on the couch. “Sensei,” she whispered to him. He lightly stirred if only to show he was half-listening.

“I’m going to rehearsals but don’t make any dinner plans,” she looked away to purse her lips slightly. “I’d like to make dinner for us… and I’ll be home around 7” 

With that she slipped out of the warm house into the cold blue day and found herself at La Fille. 

“Asa!” Nana cried running to her from the small collection of dancers wrapped up in coats, sweaters, and hats. Asa herself wore mittens and matching ear muffs. Miri was noticeably missing from the group. 

Asa grumbly crouched down for the (expected) hug from the little girl in Hello Kitty winterwear. They had entered an unusually chilly winter that even early November couldn’t protect them from. 

The group was gathered outside of La Fille waiting for Ume and a couple other moms to arrive with a van to pack up any supplies and people that needed rides to the comfortable but far entertainment district the ballet was being hosted at. 

When they arrived Asa thanked the parents she did and didn’t know. Her first observation of the theater was that it was small and intimate, but elegant and classy. The chairs folded down to reveal blue velvet seats. The architecture inside was obviously inspired by french aesthetics with beautiful carved walls and a large chandelier. Inside many of their stage hands and the instructor, director, and other important administrators decorated the stage with props for Act 1. 

On stage the backdrops portray a watercolor forest painted in warm autumnal hues to show the harvest festival has come across the medieval town. Two little houses with thatched roofs are angled from stage left and right facing into the audience. Their doors lead off stage, and the audience blind spots they create allow good storage. 

Beside them near the back of the stage are various props to portray the town's export of grapes and wine such as barrels and a cart full of hay. 

Risers are built along the side and painted to replicate wooden benches. These benches are moved and used around the stage for the Corps to sit on as well as places for all the dancers to wait for their ‘turn’ in the wide and clear stage uncluttered by props. Asa could feel herself smile as she walked up onto the stage, excitement coursing through her body. She imagined the steps she would take that night, and let the dread of seeing Miri again follow. 

Instead of ruminating Asa let it go and warmed her body. Nothing could ruin opening night. 

______________

Where the fuck was Miri. 

Asa had been thinking that very thought on the hour every hour until she angrily packed her dance bag at 6:45. Rehearsal ran slightly late, and she would have to rush to get home and start dinner. Thankfully Asa already set out everything she would need for hot pot. That's when deep in her pink duffle, vibrations rang out the high pitched sing song notes of her ring tone. Asa dug through the bag and found the bedazzled cell phone and flipped it open. She took a deep breath.

“Hello, this is Asa?” Asa let the soft happiness of a full day dancing into her voice, even if she hadn’t gotten the euphoric experience with Miri, Giselle could always soothe her wounds. 

“Asa hey!” it was Denji Asa thought 

“What’s going on?” she asked

“Nothing much I was just at Kishibe’s and you weren’t by. Where are you? La Fille? He asked me to pick you up,” Usually Asa would be able to sense the wince of annoyance in Denji’s voice when Kishibe made him do anything but not today. If anything he reminded Asa of Nana with a treat behind her back. 

“No, no. Did I tell you where our theater is? It's ummm…” she rushed out of the locker room and poked her head out the french doors. “First and 88th-ish, but I’m just leaving you don’t have to-” she didn’t even finish her sentence hearing a click and dial tone. 

Asa was in too good a mood to be annoyed. Tired and dreading the walk home? Yes. Too ready for tomorrow to care? Also yes. Asa fixed her loose hair and buttoned her peacoat before popping out into the fading day’s street, kind enough to walk up a little less than a block so as not to inconvenience the boy- when she found him walking down the block already! 

“You didn’t,” she said. How could she not have seen this coming? He had mentioned it offhand over a million times. Leaned against Denji’s leg was the sleek 1997 Suzuki Intruder in clean black. 

“Awesome right!?” He cried as Asa walked over, she admired the cool bike when he pulled out one of her manga magazines featuring a cover with the professional biker Rei Kashino from Mars. 

“Hey that's mine!” she attempted to snatch it from him before he held it above his head. 

“Ya said I could take whatever I wanted from your collection last time I was over,” he shrugged, referencing their last reading lesson. “Just told the guy at the lot to gimme whatever this guy has!” Denji was laughing and obviously excited to show her the bike. 

“Do you even have a license?"

“Duh,” he rolled his eyes, “I ain’t a criminal, in fact my instructor told me I was naturally gifted,” he stood as if to let the praise wash over him. Asa gazed at him with her arms crossed. 

“Well?” she tried to motion between him and the extra helmet obviously poking out of his saddle bag. 

He turned around and popped out the extra helmet “Thought we could decorate them with the bike, I want orange flames and uh teeth! Big teeth,” He motioned with his hand all over the bike and his own helmet on the seat. “And we could do somethin’ for you and Power’s too! Like… I dunno what do you guys agree on,” 

Asa giggled “Nothing really,” 

“Nah there's something I’m sure of it,” Denji said

“Pink?” 

He considered it for a moment, almost sticking his tongue out in such a cute way before getting distracted. 

“Hey where’s Miri?” he asked 

Asa groaned, reaching for the helmet “Don’t get me started,” she said, popping it on. 

____________

Clothes rustled on hangers and between drawers as Denji searched for a proper outfit. He wanted to look nice for this event. Partially so that Asa wouldn’t hit him upside the head, but partially because this was important to her. Denji wanted to be… cool. 

Especially after hearing Asa’s rant about how not so cool Miri and her had been to each other. Over delicious hot pot Denji had never wished Reze was around more. Well, maybe when Asa or Power hung onto him as they rode around town on his new bike did he wish Reze was there instead cuddling up against his back. That was when he missed her the most. 

As he grabbed a pair of dark navy pants he was unsure what top to wear with… this was way too hard! ‘Why couldn’t Asa just figure it out for me like before?’ he pouted

Asa told him not as formal as the concert, but better dressed than for work. What did that even mean??

As he took off his shirt and shoved on the pants Aki had him get pressed at the dry cleaners he reached for a thick cable knit sweater and a carhartt jacket. He clipped his motorcycle keys to his belt-

When Power popped in half dressed fighting to get out of the dress and cardigan Aki was putting her in. He still had his hair down but was otherwise dressed a single step above work clothes. 

“I will leave you here with Angel if you don’t wear your sweater!” he said

Denji stopped her from careening around his room “Hey I thought you liked the clothes ya picked out for this?” he asked slightly frustrated

“Nope! Your prime minister DEMANDS yes DEMANDS she must be dressed for war at this minute!” 

Together the brothers straightened Power’s outfit and somehow got her into the flat mary janes they compromised on earlier that week. They got to the entry room where Angel was waiting for Aki so they could leave. Power kicked up a fuss again when Denji attempted to split and take his bike without her, so begrudgingly they rode together. Power’s flowing skirt billowed in the wind as she shouted insults at all the drivers and pedestrians they passed. 

Finally at the theater Aki (not any of his devil companions) admired the classic theater awning where Giselle by the La Fille Company was written across a bright white board like from a vintage cinema. Along the walls framing the ticket booth and doors were french carvings slightly weathered with age, looking as if they may have been rebuilt a couple of times, but nonetheless beautiful. 

Aki produced the four tickets and wrangled Angel and Power to their seats. Denji was more behaved, only tapping him on the shoulder to ask “Ya want popcorn?” 

Aki looked around at the other patrons and began to say “I don’t think this is that kind of theater…” but Denji was already gone. 

Wandering the fringes of the humble theater lobby he looked for the entrance to the back stage he might find Asa in. But before he could spot the door he spotted Asa in the shadow of an open door. She was waving at him with an angry look on her face. 

“Hey, what's wrong?” He said noticing the nervous glance on her face. 

“Miri! Have you seen him? He has to be here right now,”

“Nah, I could call him?” 

“Don’t bother, everyone back here has already tried,” Asa deflated a little in worry before perking back up and leading Denji through the door into the dark hallway, “Lemme show you my dressing room!” 

Through the dark backstage area Denji could hear the rustle of the deep ocean like curtains and laughter of teenage youth. That's what most of the company consisted of. He saw scattered and anxious kids moving across the curtain gathering people and getting them all in order. Two middle aged women checked on each and every one of them grabbing their bodies and costumes to straighten them. In the wings of the theater were big wooden and cardboard props. He spotted the dark outlines of a grave, stacks of flowers, branches, and other miscellaneous items. The only thing keeping him from reaching out and getting stuck in the mud of it all was Asa’s gentle fingers on his wrist and the barely visible smile across her face.

Further backstage they came into the light, and Denji actually got a good look at her costume. Asa had a form fitting cream top with some kind of laced up brown vest over it, her skirt was made of full yellow silk and a little white apron. What he neglected to notice was the absence of shoes she wore. Over pink tights he saw light blue plush boots barely softening the clink of Asa’s porcelain feet.  

“Uhh whats up with the space shoes” he asked dead confusion on his face what the hell are those for? He couldn’t deny the modern (kind of silly) boots looked funky alongside the peasant get up. 

Asa scowled as she blushed. “They’re dance boots,” she said shyly if a bit annoyed. 

“I just wanted you to see all the stuff everyone gave me,” Asa said with a haughty tone. Asa hoped her smile didn’t betray the pride she took from their earlier matinee as she dragged him behind a white dressing screen. Behind the dressing screen it smelled strongly of vanilla incense and he spotted another white costume with fairy wings delicately draped on a manikin. 

Looking at those things it was hard not to ignore the wrapped bouquets of flowers around her table, the teddy bears, the letters, and the boxes scattered around. She bent over one pile of them looking for something. “Most of the younger kids' parents got me something cause they invited their work friends and they gifted me something,” Asa let herself smile and look up at Denji with a silver gray clock keychain stuck on a plush yellow rabbit in her hand. 

“This just made me think of you,” She said, motioning for him to take it. He then sat on the floor with her and looked at the bunny. It looked kind of expensive, with how fluffy it was. It was pretty cute, sure he was glad to have it, but did this really remind Asa of him?

“Well I’m way tougher than this bunny,” he shrugged a little red in the face, “And I got you something too- I just left it with Kishibe. Though, you prolly don’t need it with all this stuff to,” 

“No! I want it!” her outburst let a smirk on his face.

 “So how long until they get this show on the road?”

Asa looked at the clock above them “Umm about ten or twenty minutes. We just finished warming up before they opened the doors so this is all the free time I get tonight,” She said smiling. 

“Actually-” just as he opened his mouth a loud CLANG rang out. A wind gust came inside. They both perked up and ran out of Asa’s dressing space joining the rest of the company at the back door where Miri was explaining himself to their director. 

But Asa pushed past all the other girls, boys, directors, instructors, and Denji to grab Miri by the collar. From where Denji was he could barely spy her biting remarks to the boy. Denji laughed at him a bit and gave Miri a wave before leaving the dressing room and finding his way back to Aki, Power, and Angel. 

_________

Asa stretched as the buzzing backstage almost came to a boil, and the orchestra began. “I could kill you for this,” she whispered to Miri who rushed to his place straight from costume. He could only respond with a scowl before he had to school his face and rush out onto the autumnal stage. 

Asa found her place inside of Giselle’s cottage as well. As she heard the cheerful music of a new day begun however, and as she stretched out all her worries, she was left ready to dance as the bright young star of this little peasant town: Giselle.

The slight chill of an autumn morning met Asa as she emerged from her little cottage. Soft woodwinds met her as she glided across the stage. She wondered about the knock she heard at the door, as well as the noises she assumed were her love, but didn’t pay it too much mind until Miri appeared as a pleasant surprise.

The leitmotif representing the young couple rang out as they met one another. She reached for her door, but was gently pulled back to the open stage by Miri. Asa’s shy smile crossed her face as she tried to evade him, only to find herself dancing with the young man. They slightly mirrored each other’s movements, and Asa found herself looking up at him adoringly as the boy swore his love to her. 

The young girl took his arm down, only to pick a flower instead. He loves me, he loves me not, could reveal that instead… only to reveal he loves me not? 

Miri snatches it away, and plucks an “unseen” petal off instead. 

Here is the part Asa enjoys, the music melts from their soft melody of telltale love into an upbeat rhythm matching a series of jetes in time with one another. It's great fun prancing about avoiding the young boy when he gets too close. Asa smiles widely then finds herself blocked from home by another man. 

Asa rolls her eyes as he has interrupted their fun, he grabs her and proclaims that instead he loves Asa but she has none of his pushiness. She rushes back to her cottage only to turn and see the girls from the harvest have returned. Yes, let us dance now!

Asa obviously sways alongside the girls  enjoying the rewards of a hard working morning as she performs arabesques and pirouettes alongside them. She lets Miri join in, her shyness (and previous hostility) melts away. At this moment it doesn’t matter what has happened between them because the harvest festival is in full swing, and Asa needs a dance partner. When they grasp each other’s feathery forms Miri notices mischief in her smile. For the next ten or so seconds they operate as one being among the other dancers, only enraptured by each other. Until they are separated once more. 

The girls join up in groups and Asa loses Miri as the girls swirl together three to a group. Asa joins them, letting herself be tied to them twirling around the stage, until like an unfolding apple peel, they all unravel into a smooth line. Asa finds herself at the end with a clear view of Miri and performs a series of pique turns to reach Miri once again. 

Partway through Giselle’s ailing health keeps Asa from the fun. She clutches her heart gently. It hurts to see everyone having fun without her. They dance and twirl like they were built for it, like they earned it. Asa pushes Miri fawning over her away then. She’s already tired, and knows that her mother would dislike her pushing herself too hard, but Asa cannot be kept away from the dancers. With a smile she pushes the useless rock of her heart out of mind and joins the girl’s again. Seamlessly she is welcomed back into the festival, and so is Miri. 

Retour de la vendange et valse is the song that continues for a good while more. This is when everything is sunny and fine. Its motifs aren’t yet rolled up and prepackaged to the beats of tragedy on the way. 

Asa becomes so enraptured by dancing, and so enraptured by Miri beside her the whole crowd leaves them behind as they themselves are enraptured by the couple’s strange, stunning game of mouse. Asa doesn’t even notice as she is too focused on Miri to care when the girls join them again. 

That is… until her mother arrives and finds her. Asa’s mother warns her to stop it else they summon the Willis. Which are the souls of unmarried women who wish to dance anyone they find to death. While everyone else turns a blind eye to it, Mother notices Asa’s weakness and forces her to leave the dancers. Instead she has to watch as her talented friends have such a good time without her. 

They are so beautiful as they run and leap and pirouette in perfect unity. Asa wishes terribly to be one of them. She wished there was a way to dance nonstop, alongside them. 

They all dance for her then and one girl comes forward taking Asa by the hand, you danced beautifully she says with her eyes. Asa thanks her as the girl and her glide to the crowd gathered around a flower filled cart. Miri gently lifts her up onto his strong shoulders  where the girls on the cart crown her the Harvest Queen. 

At that moment Asa lets herself be prideful of her talent. I earned this role she thinks. Everyone in this theater is looking at how graceful and beautiful I am. As she sits down beside many of the corps de ballet, they watch two beautiful peasants perform a pas de due and four more peasants, two ballerinas and two dancers, come together to perform impressive jetes, cabrioles, pointe work, and more. 

Asa enjoys watching them, not as much as she enjoys dancing with them, but gazing at all the talent her fellow dancers have as they show off the steps they worked so hard on. 

As the festival dissolves she leaves Miri and heads back into her home. Asa takes an unpoised second to relax. On stage Asa’s unwanted suitor will discover a secret of Miri’s. Soon the hunting party will arrive. 

Her brief moment of reprieve is ended by the strong sounds of distant french horns. They grow louder, and louder, and soon outplay the woodwinds of her little town. Asa realizes the hunting party of local noblemen have arrived. This includes a beautiful Countess Bathilde. 

Bathilde and her father ask about the festival that has just concluded for now, and they summon the Harvest Festival Queen, Asa. She greets them with all she has, a flower and then invites them to their table. Asa serves Bathilde wine, I wish I could have such a beautiful dress she thinks. She touches the fine fabric- and Bathilde notices her. 

Bathilde gets up and asks her how did she become the Harvest Queen? By dancing of course Asa symbolizes by placing a few simple steps. She gazes at Mother and then at Bathilde may I demonstrate? 

Bathilde stretches out her hand inviting her to do so at the behest of Asa’s mother. 

Here everyone is staring at Asa as she may finally dance again. She can spy Bathilde is excited to receive such a show, and Asa prepares herself in the far back of the stage. She poses with one foot gracefully balanced behind the other, and raises her arms. 

Asa steps up into a 90 degree arabesque and steps out of it just as quickly. In this variation she feels like a daisy on a hill in the wind. Each step is delicate as it is difficult. Her feet are carefully, quickly, gracefully placed to leap up. Asa gains quite a bit of height before she lands and reaches her left leg out to tap the floor. She twirls around a high arabesque en pointe and finds her way across the stage once more. There she does it again mirroring her previous steps before reaching the middle of the stage. 

With her face molded into a shy yet proud smile, Asa imagines how in love Giselle is. How obsessed she is with her love. There's this element of excitable mania just below the surface of her performance.

Asa twirls with one foot pointed out and slightly curved, her skirt swirls behind her as she descends to one knee and up again. Delicate. Soft. 

She then finds herself en pointe at the back of the stage. This next sequence of rond de jambes looks simple but is anything but. On beat with the faster pace of the music she balances on one toe box as the other slightly, with extreme control, kicks out. She hops on her one toe box and performs another kick and another. Quickly. Keeping pace with the music.

Asa gently performs the steps all the way down to Bathilde and then hops in a controlled graceful circle with her skirt held up so the audience may see the impressive work she is doing. Her smile is only slightly strained as Asa performs this perfectly. The 20 second series of steps took her hours to perfectly master and Asa would not let it go to waste as she does a little cheer in her head as she finishes and steps off pointe. 

Excited by her success Asa takes long strides of steps into a series of short curved leaps. The menage takes her around the stage before she shortens the leaps into steps and finishes a step up onto her knee before Bathilde. 

The crowd crashes into applause, I did it! Asa thinks. She converses with Bathilde about her love looking for Miri but cannot find him. So in celebration Bathilde gifts her a silver necklace, and Asa goes ‘round showing everyone the beautiful treasure. 

Bathilde and the nobles then rest in the peasants homes from the long hunt, and the stage is vacated. 

Backstage Asa giggles and congratulates everyone, as quietly as she can. Outside, after more discovery about Miri, everyone comes out and dances without Asa. From where Asa can peek at them from backstage they do a wonderful job. The corps radiates celebration and joy at being free from summertime work. Male and female dancers form pairs and perform their brilliantly choreographed steps to wow their audience. 

At this moment Asa understands why every seat in the small theater is full. They had worked so hard on this over the past two months, not just on their dancing but on putting up fliers for the performances, spreading the news around their neighborhoods, Asa herself invited every member of Public Safety she knew and provided them with extremely cheap tickets. Now she could tell it was all worth it. 

When Asa and Miri join them again, Asa didn’t have to fake her mirthfulness, she really was that excited to join the corps in this big sequence full of people. 

Until her unwanted suitor once again came into frame. The suitor interrupted their dance separating Asa and Miri. He bowed to Miri, as a show that he knew the truth. The suitor knew that Miri was a nobleman and could never be with Asa. 

Asa brushed the suitor off, he didn’t know what he was talking about she thought as the man split them apart with a sword a sword only a nobleman would have. 

Asa stared at Miri in shock and pushed the sword away, she placed her soft hands onto Miri’s guilty face. It isn’t true right? It’s not true? 

Miri looks away in guilt and the wildly cheerful music that permeates the entire first act strengthens and hardens into a roar of wild betrayal. The strings quicken and vibrate as the suitor accuses Miri, and Miri proves him right. 

Miri unsheathes the sword and moves to attack the suitor but the townspeople stop him. The suitor uses the hunting horn previously left behind to summon the noblemen, as they arrive they recognize Miri and question his peasant clothes. Miri brushes them off, he takes Bathilde’s hand and kisses it. 

Asa, shocked by her own actions, splits them apart and sees the truth. What do you mean? What do you mean he is engaged to you and not me? Chaos erupts in Asa’s mind. She questions everything. Asa grabs Miri’s face and shakes it like it will give her answers. 

Her feet nearly trip against each other as she softly steps back in confusion. Nothing makes sense anymore. Everything she understands has fallen apart. She runs to her mother, and starts to laugh. Isn’t it funny? Isn’t it funny how someone like her thought she could be in love? 

Asa shakes her bun loose, her hair so long that it slinks over her whole back as she sways up from her mother’s lap and back down again. Miri steps closer and she shivers away. As Miri drifts away Asa looks up from her mother’s lap and rises. She tries to rush off, but there is nowhere to go. 

The motif from the lover’s theme plays as the tension grows so thick you could cut it with a knife. No one moves. Only Asa who shakes like a leaf. 

Once again, their leitmotif plays as Asa pantomimes herself reaching for a flower and plucking the petals. Her long dark hair slinks over her face in unruly fashion as she gently steps up and replicates the steps of their previous dance from the beginning-but then stops confused. Her willowy form becomes weak, once again she reaches for her lover but he isn’t there. 

Asa keels over covering her face, no one should see her cry, she’s so ashamed, why did this have to happen to me? Black hair covers her like ink slashed across her costume. 

Stepping back she trips over the discarded sword. Great idea, I should just kill myself! Asa picks it up, manically waving the blade around by the tip. Asa imagines the small bleeding cuts it would leave on her fingertips as she swings the hilt side to the crowd gathered around her. 

She points the blade towards her own heart when the suitor wrenches it away from her. Asa laughs in his face. She backs up so hard her back hits Bathilde and she curtsies weakly before Miri catches her when she’s about to fall. He gently lifts her back up. He looks at her with such remorse in his eyes but Asa doesn’t wanna see it. She pushes him away herself and runs across the stage.

After the melody plays out Asa looks straight into the crowd. She rushes to them and reaches her hand up as the Willis theme plays. The spirits of young scorned women are visible, just barely, to her and only her. Everyone gawks at the display she is putting on. 

The haunting melody carries Asa with the wind, once more she steps back and plays out their dance from earlier that day. Only when Miri reaches out his arm for her like he had previously she brushes past him as the beat of the music picks up, so does the explosiveness of her dancing. 

Rapidly- she moves across the stage in wild turns until-

Everything has come to a halt. Asa reaches for her heart. As everyone gawks at her strange display she rushes through the crowd, hardly recognizing anyone. She looks to the sky and spies ghostly figures before she is directed to the one face of comfort. Her mother. She rushes there, and then to Miri- but before she can embrace the man she loves her body goes limp and lifeless. 

A beat of shocked silence plays, before chaos erupts around her lifeless body. Miri reaches to embrace her- and he is pushed away. The nobles vacate the scene as the townspeople express their outrage for what Miri has done. He has played with them, he has invaded their home, and they are done with him. Despite this he finds himself at Asa’s body mourning the girl he loved. 

Finally, Asa’s mother reaches the sobbing Miri and roughly shoves him away. At that the young man leaves the stage in shame. Mother pushes everyone away- they leave the stage painting a picture of two women consumed by the large stage. The curtains close on a mother’s grief.  

__________

Silently- as quiet as mice the girl playing her mother helps Asa up. She smiles at Asa and whispers “Good job!” 

“You as well,” Asa lets the light smile cover her grimace. Backstage she is going to have to talk to Miri. 

At the white dressing screen stands Miri, his first priority should be to find his Act 2 costume before meeting her- why Asa is here- but instead he stands there expressionless. He looks almost bored waiting for her there, staring at the ceiling he seems as if he’s about to start tapping his foot.  

Glaring Asa gives him the side eye as she slides behind the screen. First she takes off her vest and says “We should talk later, after the show,” 

“No,” Miri says. He pauses. Asa can tell from his shadow across the screen he shifts from side to side. “I can’t dance with you again without hashing this out, Asa! I know that's the only thing you could give a damn about. That's why I haven’t come to practice,” 

How dare he? Asa thinks pushing her skirts to the floor. 

Not to let him hear the anger that would come out of her voice Asa stays silent. She rolls her feet. Only in her leotard now Asa pushes her undone hair away from her back and undresses the manikin. She tries to keep focused on keeping her pristine costume neat as her mind races with whatever is wrong with this stupid dancer. 

She sees her face contorted into a biting scowl from the vanity mirror across the room- 

I’m not gonna let him ruin my face Asa thinks. She wanted his last memories of her to be composed, soft, and… graceful. Yes, that was the right word.  

He tries to speak again “Can’t I just say-”

“I don’t think we should be together anymore,” 

Just as the words come out of her mouth, the words she had been practicing all day, Miri pushes into the dressing room. “I was going to tell you I was sorry,” hurt evident on his face “Isn’t that what you wanna hear? I never wanted to pressure you, I’m just tired of everything we do together is just dancing,” His expression is pained. “I’m tired of it!” 

Asa looks over her shoulder at him as she steps into the Willis costume. “Well dancing is the only thing I wanna do. I could care less about anything else- so, so we should just break it off and forget about it!” Asa turned back to face the manakin. She wasn’t gonna show him the tears budding up in her eyes- or let those tears fall. 

“Fine. That’s great. So what you were saying the other day, do you admit that was just you projecting?” 

Asa zipped the romantic white costume up to her back. She turned and tried to look at him straight in the face. She fails, and looks down and to the side where her flowers had accumulated from earlier in the night. He was right. “It’s not all my fault you know,” she says “If you didn’t like dancing anymore you should’ve stayed away from me,” She pushes past him, her long black hair swaying as Miri stares at her receding back. 

______________

Onstage the autumnal sky is replaced by a deep dark night. Brambles cover the stage, lit up against soft glittering moonlight. It looks eerily cold. You can almost feel the shiver Miri has as he walks across the stage in the blue gray toned cape and costume he wears. 

The fleeting notes of the Willis echo throughout the theater, only now the notes hold a more threatening air to them.  Miri looks behind him. He shakes it off. Pins prick the back of his neck as the threatening music ups the tension. There's something following him. In the deep shadows where the audience can only glimpse out of the corner of their eye, they spy quick footed dancers disappear as fast as they can spot them. The ballerinas trick the naked eye, did I actually see that? The audience thinks or am I simply on edge? 

Miri runs off the stage, leaving the audience to wonder where he has gone. 

The stage lightens up- but only slightly as if a cloud passed across the full moon. The wood cross covered in flowers below a large tree appears in view, and the high strung music softens into a beautiful and mild melody. A woman crosses the stage gently, perfectly poised en pointe. She is silent, almost floating along the stage with a thin veil over her head. Her ghostly figure seems barely there as she leaves the stage. 

Returning she is as ethereal as before, without the veil, revealing a crown nestled in her hair made of pale lilies of the valley. She herself is as pale as the white romantic era costume she wears. So delicate it looks as if the wind blows her way wrong then the woman could disappear.

Myrtha the queen of the Willis twirls softly her skirt lifting in the air like ashes that fall after a brilliant fire. She is alone on the stage, stark white against the deep dark night. A fairy-like tune plays as Myrtha steps into an arabesque and glides across the stage. Life has drained out of this ballet, there is no joy behind Myrtha’s dancing, but there is awe.

She gracefully steps over to the far side of the stage to retrieve two rosemary branches. With these branches in either hand they act as an extension of her arm. Hopping up into brief arabesques, Myrtha looks like she just might stay floating there. With the branches she uses them as an extension of her own arms. 

With a gentle toss Myrtha throws one branch to stage right and one to stage left. Soft flutes pick up the tune to a series of gentle jetes that leave the audience gazing woefully at the Willis Queen. 

She poses in a slightly curved form, then takes long smooth steps to either side of the stage raising her arms as she does. Just as Myrtha did before, ghosts enter the stage perfectly en pointe, barely floating along with thin white veils over their heads. The corps arms are poised to almost cradle a child, replicating something the girls were robbed of in life. 

Myrtha stands in the center of them. They step towards her slowly, so lost of life as they form a grid pattern of rows and columns. Their gentle movements betray the women’s inner feelings of anger. Two attendants break from the front most row keeping the careful grid in place. Each dancer finds her perfectly matching partner and links hands. The two attendants, closest to Myrtha who sways alone. They gently step in a short perfect circle tapping their feet out and then raising their hands into first position. They slightly step out into an arabesque and repeat the sequence. Perfectly in line with one another.

Asa gazes at the just barely out of sync corps she admires the girl's skills. This was Asa’s favorite white act, where each dancer perfectly replicates the next, dressed in fine white costumes. As the girls in white mesmerize herself and the audience they lose track of individuality, each girl is a shadow of the other until you wonder if this is only a trick fashioned by repeating mirrors rather than a beautiful show of skill. 

A soloist emerges from the corps once they finish up. Despite her lively dancing her own face is left dead calm. As are her movements quick footed but unemotional. Another soloist emerges and once she does the same the large group of women move as one once more. 

Myrtha herself emerges on beat with the music, the greatest of them all. She commands whichever way they go and perfectly instructs the symmetric patterns the corps make. It is beautiful. It is devoid of life. It is as cool and soft as the light wind of a midnight sky. 

Myrtha joins the quick footed women as the music’s tension rises and rises until it has been softly released by the final pose. Only giving a few seconds of applause the women surround the grave and Asa supposedly appears. Each note raises the tension until Asa in her white romantic skirt and thin veil over her head follows Myrtha into the stage. 

Mytha snatches the veil off and Asa has come back to life it seems, only devoid of all her color and joyful dancing. 

Asa reaches a 90 degree arabesque and powerfully spins before she stops on a dime and shortly leaps over to Myrtha. Under the queen her head is downturned in respect. Tension to see Giselle once more as she was cuts into the stage. But that girl is gone.

 The music grows as she turns back with new permission to dance. Free of her mortal body Asa performs higher, more powerful leaps than ever before. She leaves the stage without any expression and is rewarded with a loud applause. 

The corps dance shortly once more when Myrtha hears something- she holds her hand up to the Willis sending them away. Then she herself leaves the stage. 

A mournful weight falls onto Miri as he crosses onto the stage. We see him behind a meshy screen before he officially enters the space with a large lily bouquet in hand. His cape billows as he gently runs across the stage. He stares down at his love’s grave placing the cape and bouquet where they sit. 

Just as he comes to a knee for half a second Asa in her brilliant white tulle comes poking out of the wings only to return just as quickly. Almost like she was never there.

 After a few beats Asa runs onto the stage passing his grasp of the ghost as if she has slipped out of Miri’s fingers. She runs across the back mesh side as well, hardly visible. Miri holds his strong arms out inviting her to return to him, obvious confusion across his face. There is a deeper layer of despair under that, he holds his face in his hands sinking down onto one knee before Asa returns to the stage. Fleetingly, he might see her, but only if the light catches just right. 

Asa’s arms stretch out in a delicate balance, she steps gracefully and lifts her leg over her body in a high arabesque almost reaching 180 degrees before falling back down into silent steps around the man she loves. 

Miri looks up-shocked by her presence and tries to reach out for her shimmering body only to miss her stepping right by him. As Asa brushes against the boy she can feel the slightest breeze of their momentum brushing. Finally after repeating this twice she leaps and he catches her- effortlessly lifting her into the air. Like he has just barely caught her from floating off. 

As she steps back down to earth they embrace one another opening their bodies like a book to the audience. They repeat gentle steps into a high leap, mirroring each other before Asa runs off once more. 

He searches for her, where has Asa gone? Miri thinks before the young ghost returns with rosemary branches in her hands. The music strengthens as she tosses them about the stage and Miri follows her. He picks up the branches and holds them close to his body. They are the only proof he has to show she was really there. He reaches out for her- and by the grace of her soul Asa returns, dropping rosemary flowers around him.

Just like that she disappears and reappears again. Miri follows Asa into the brush and the music stirs itself from a fresh tragic love to the emotionally charged Entree D’Hillarion. The young suitor who revealed Miri’s secret rushes onto the scene and before you could blink he has been surrounded by the Willis. Under their power the suitor performs an array of difficult and exhausting jump work. 

Asa admires the boy for his skill keeping up with the large troupe of Willis. That boy was the understudy for Miri and had memorized double the work as most other dances to be spectacular in both parts. Earlier at the matinee he played the part that Miri did now (the boy’s own understudy doing a rather poor job as the suitor). 

The Willis began to close in on him commanding him to dance more and more before the suitor ultimately met his demise. 

Asa had enjoyed playing the role of Myrtha in previous ballets she performed (junior ballets) just for this dangerous command of the army of maidens. 

Mytha stayed on stage as the ghosts carted off the suitor and then found themselves rushing to surround their next victim, Miri. They pointed their hands at him, almost controlling his body to begin the exciting song and dance again- before Asa rushed out after him shielding the boy from Myrtha’s wrath. 

She stood in front of her queen gesturing to Miri to go by her grave at the sign of the cross where he may be safe from the ghosts. Instead of the man she loves, Asa is ensnared by the troupe of beautiful ghosts. Myrtha turns her head in disapproval away from the cross. Then, clears the stage for Asa’s performance. 

Her palms face the crowd and her feet are firmly planted on the floor when she rises en pointe and drifts like a ghost. From there she performs a series of arabesques, beautifully pulling her arms back and away mirroring a gentle wind. She lets her once expressionless face fill with love she understands is doomed as she gazes at Miri. 

Unable to resist her gentle dance Miri leaves the sign of the cross to dance with her. Like a wisp in the air Asa gently performs her steps in cold perfection. As she dances with Miri they both think of what could have been, and what they no longer have. 

He holds her gently- the same as before. The way you hold delicate fabric, afraid to tear it and afraid for it to disappear in your hands. He holds her and lifts her across the stage where their gentle love attracts the attention of Myrtha. Asa wonders if the first rays of sunlight will come soon to protect her love after she cannot. 

Holding the shoulder of her love Asa poses and wishes just then for every anger she has against Miri to leave her. Just for now. Just so when the music lightens again into something warm she can enjoy the short performance they have left together. 

She begins to dance once more with the help of Miri, lifting her like a gentle flower. On the stage she lets go of him and hops high into the air with the warm quick witted beat of the music. Her spirit remembers what a joy it had been to dance like this as she goes on and on-making her bid for Myrtha to let Miri go. 

But as Asa disappears from view, Myrtha and the Willis do not and command Miri into an exhausting sequence of gentle and impressive steps and leaps. It's beautiful despite where the audience can just barely spy the deep tire upon Miri’s face. 

As Myrtha reaches across the stage gently stepping towards the boy Asa and Miri’s love theme rings out- and so does Asa. She steps before Myrtha and performs against the sound of her first love. The dark night seems to just maybe be painted with the transparent rays of yellow when she crosses the stage. 

Once again Asa disappears having done what she can when the corps take the stage again- performing their dance as one for Miri. Commanding his exhausted body once more. 

Miri pleads for his life, but Myrtha refuses. He dances and Asa joins him once more, relieving him while she can from the determined Willis. Now the couple reflects the steps of the corps attempting to their best degree to save themselves until morning.

 Miri collapses- only a few beats later to be pulled up once more and the powerful notes from Entree D’Hillarion ring again. Only just as Miri breath begins to leave him the morning bells ring, the Willis must disappear until night overcomes them again. 

Over Miri’s body Asa holds the boy. Gently raising him to his feet she looks at him, and forgives him. What he has done was wrong, it hurt her, but she will not let that transform herself into an undead spirit. She twirls through his arms as he rises. Each step they take distancing them just slightly more, just slightly more as the sun rises and Asa disappears once again. For the final time this time, she has risen to heaven. 

Only Miri is left, his discarded cloak over one arm and the flower she gave him in hand as the only proof Asa was ever there that night. 

The curtain closes and just as fast Asa and Miri step around and in front of it to bow for the crowd. It's a small theater- but to Asa it could have been as large as the Royal Opera House. Each star Myrtha, the suitor, Asa, Miri, and the corps step out for their own special applause and gifts. Asa receives a bouquet of white tulips and stops trying to hide the wild smile across her face with grace. 

___________

Asa stared into the mirror into her worry free face. (A rare sight). It really happened. I really danced Giselle, Asa thought. In the cold room she already changed out of her Act 2 costume into a warm thick pink coat with a fluffy white interior and collar. She wore a matching white beanie and gloves with white earmuffs over the beanie. It created a stark contrast to her ink black hair, which was still kinked from her tight braided bun. 

Just as she prepared to get up and go, Asa felt the cold stare of someone behind her. She whipped her head around to see the white haired punk girl who worked at Horseman. 

The dancer blinked and suddenly the girl appeared right beside her chair looking down on her with that creepy blank expression. The girl's voice is quiet and soft spoken as the girl says “I would suggest you leave Public Safety in the near future,” 

“I’m sorry? Who are you anyway? Who let you back here?” Asa’s face reddened as she sees her frightful expression in the mirror. Who is this person? Does she want something from me? What does she know about Public Safety? 

“You could call me Fami,”  the girl had an airy tone to her voice, like she was a real life Willis that could disappear at any moment. The girl paused for a long moment before saying, “I honestly believe you have a future in dance, maybe not with that new national ballet right now… but soon,” 

Asa waved her off “I’m not good enough for that- they’d put me in the corps or as a soloist, but I know myself well enough,” she turned away from Fami then looking at herself in the mirror said “I want to be great, or nothing,” 

She whips herself around then to stare back up at Fami “And it's not like I can just leave Public Safety! Who are you to say that anyway?”

Fami turned her head in confusion “Why not? Don’t you want to?” 

Asa’s confident expression faltered then, she bit her lip. It’s not like I haven’t thought of it. 

A slight smile peaked Fami’s face, almost like she could hear what Asa was thinking before slipping a note into Asa’s pocket and waving goodbye. 

Outside in the cold night air Power, Denji, and Kishibe wave to her. She waved back calling “Sensei!” as she runs over to them. “So did you like the show?” Asa asks. 

“Awesome!” Denji says with a thumbs up

“Totally boringggg,” Power replied 

Kishibe smacked the back of her head as he said “Looked good,” dryly. 

In Denji’s hand was a pink gift bag bursting with wrapping paper and a small bouquet of pink roses poking out. He handed it to her mentioning under his breath “Don’t open it yet, but Kishibe really went all out to put it together,” 

“Thank you,” Asa bowed smiling “I’m glad you enjoyed the show,” 

“Methinks we should go to dinner now!” Power cried and they all climbed into Kishibe’s car except for Denji who took his bike there. Afterwards as they said their goodbyes outside the restaurant as Power got situated with her helmet Denji pulled out a silver metal zippo lighter from his jacket pocket. 

“This is what me and Powie really got you, I hope you don’t mind the chicken scratch in the corner,” he said scratching the back of his head before heading off. 

Finally when Asa got home she kissed Kishibe’s cheek and said goodnight to find her room was still lit in a soft golden light from the corner lamp. Oops I forgot to turn that off this morning. 

She placed the gift bag on her bed and began to really admire the silver lighter. When she ran her finger over it she could feel the debossed pink metallic fish engraved into the silver lighter. On the back were their names engraved as very very small. Power & Denji. Its true Power’s signature was almost illegible but Denji’s had greatly improved from their first lesson together. 

Inside of Kishibe’s gift were the pink roses of course, a leather bound journal, the complete Gokinjo Monogatari tankoban volumes, and the new Dance Recital Barbie and Kelly set. Asa heard herself laugh at the barbie doll, he must have heard me complaining about how much Nana wanted it. 

That night Asa curled up under the covers sore and exhausted from her first ballet as a principal dancer. However, even through her exhaustion she couldn’t help thinking of that strange girl Fami… 

Chapter Text

Bundled up in warm clothes Denji, Power, and Asa crowded around a small table at Family Burger arguing. 

“Y’know that guy what's his face! In the hunter clothes who- not like he was the main guy but like- he was a peasant who figures out the main guy,”

“Ohh Hillarion? The suitor?” 

“Yeah! He totally-“ Denji interrupted himself to take a bite of his burger “got the short end of the stick! It's not like he thought telling on that prince would kill the chick he liked,” 

“I liked when they killed him!” Power said 

“But why didn’t they kill the prince! He was the bad guy!” 

Asa swallowed her bite before speaking “first of all quit talking with your mouth full,” she wiped her face with a napkin hoping one of the fiends beside her would do the same (they never did) “and secondly, Giselle forgives Albrecht! She spends all night trying to save his life cause she still loves him and then she gets to be at peace,” 

“Why didn’t she save the Hillarion guy?” 

“Also,” Asa bypassed his question “Miri didn’t play a prince! Albrecht is a count there's a difference,” 

Denji gave her a dead look before rolling up the foil from his burger and tossing it in the trash. 

Power gets up then too “You should know I have urgent business at the city center. Vamoose!” She says before running outside. 

“But I’m not- whatever,” she hands the remains of her burger to Denji before following him out with her cherry coke in hand. 

At the mall she looked nervously at the local dance store, for her shopping trip today she would need new ribbons, tights, and… a pointe shoe fitting. Asa cringed at how she knew the shoe maker would react to her porcelain feet. She couldn’t deny that the cracked porcelain bits around her ankle which transitioned to her smooth china feet looked like her lower leg had been encased in clay and was slowly cracking free like some kind of scab. 

Asa almost tested whether her feet were only beneath the porcelain layer- until when she knocked on her feet they gave a hollow sound. At least she could benefit from not having any physical blisters, despite feeling as if tiny needles poked her with every step. Eventually Asa believed she could become numb to the pain, only getting as bad as knives after dancing for an entire day. 

Denji poked her shoulder “Hey you good?” He asked keeping one eye on the girl beside him and the other on the fiend running around the shopping center. 

“Yeah, its just- they’re gonna have to look at my feet y’know”

Denji’s face contorted in disgust “Oh yuck these guys got some foot fetish??” 

Asa laughed out loud “No-“ she said over a laugh struggling to get her breathing in check “no way, I mean its a shoe fitting they kinda gotta look at my feet,” 

Denji smiled too “Do you want me to come in with you?” 

“No, that's fine. One of us should really stay with Power,” 

“Hey, she’s fine. Mostly,” Denji shrugged

Asa paused, that was actually really sweet of Denji, and not nearly what she expected him and Power to get up to while she had to buy new supplies

“Then yeah, c’mon” Asa said, leading the boy into the store. 

Near the back was an open space with pink benches and wood floors surrounded by shelves of shoe boxes. There were mirrors along the one wall without the boxes where an older man was waiting. 

Denji sunk into a comfy chair and pulled the rolled up Thrasher magazine out of his pocket as he watched out of the corner of his eye as Asa greeted the man. He had Asa take off her shoes, socks, and knee length leg warmers and watched her practice a few simple steps. Denji understood now why despite the cold weather Asa chose to wear shorts and complained about being too cold. 

Denji had never seen a shoe fitting before- it was pretty boring. Other than when the old man obviously couldn’t hide his discomfort with all things devilish. It's not like Asa’s toes were even that strange when you compared it to other public safety contracts. Way better than losing a fingernail or portion of your life span. Denji even found the soft sound of china clinking against china like a satisfying tune. 

The fitting took forever though, Power eventually getting bored and wandering in after her two friends. Finally Asa bought and paid for the new shoes, signing a sheet promising to buy more later. 

Walking the girls out of the mall Denji waved goodbye until hopping on his motorcycle and heading to the pier. 

There was nothing, absolutely nothing, more satisfying than riding that bike around town. Maybe a girl sucking him off, if he ever got to experience that, but from what Denji knew absolute freedom rested on the handlebars of his Suzuka 1997. 

It was slightly windy at the harbor he was meeting Miri at, the cold breeze ruffling his clothes in the wind. On the pier Denji plopped down to where Miri sat, having waved him over. 

“I didn’t know you smoked,” Denji asked like it were a question 

“I don’t,” Miri replied, “It's disgusting,” he said, taking the cigarette from his mouth and tossing it into the ocean. 

“You should’ve saved that!” Denji cried, almost reaching for it “Y’know how easy you coulda scammed the homeless outta that?” 

Miri shrugged, tossing an almost full pack of Marlboro Reds at Denji carelessly. Denji caught it from where it woulda missed his hand by a mile. 

“I get it, you ain’t over Asa,” Denji shook his head “She doesn’t smoke these- she gets those girly herbal cigs,” Denji pulls a cheap lighter out of his coat pocket and lights one of the marlboros like he’s seen the cowboys do in advertisements. 

“Get over it already! Other fish in the sea,” he said 

Miri leaned back. It was colder out by the water. The dancer was a little jealous of Denji’s thick coat. “S’ stupid,” he mumbled 

“What?” Denji asked

The chainsaw boy breathed in, Miri didn’t say anything so Denji opened his mouth back up, breathing out the biggest cloud he could. “y’know back before I had Pochita in my heart those Yakuza guys always put these out on my skin. Hurt like a bitch,”

Denji took the cigarette from his mouth then and snuffed it out against his hand. Carefully Denji put the stick back into the carton and looked down at his already healed hand. 

Miri stared at him, smiling. “My Ma worked by the pier. I’d sit and I’d wait for her to come home to our countryside shithole no matter how cold I was or how tired from dance or school. Cause I knew when I waved out at her coming up for air she might not be so mean coming home,” 

The boy pulled down his collar then- “Ma loved to set out her cigarettes on my neck. She liked showing me how to cover it up too. But all my scars are gone now,“ Miri rubbed the skin, still a pearly white color with one or two moles scattered on. He snapped his fingers “-like that” 

Denji didn’t say anything. It was weird hearing this from Miri. Usually they shot the shit for an hour and headed home, but not today. He felt like he should keep his mouth shut for Miri. 

“Asa wouldn’t tell it like this, but those dance classes were my oasis. Her dad-the uh instructor- was a saint, and yeah I always had a stupid crush on her. But after middle school and the Typhoon Devil I didn’t see her again for a long ass time,” 

Clouds began to draw around the port. It was still light out and plenty of boats peppered the water. They bobbed up and down. Up and down. Denji didn’t look Miri in the eye, watching the boats. He could tell Miri would have rathered it like that. 

After a long pause “Miss Makima came out of the woodwork and saved my life with this new heart,” 

Both boys felt the chill on their skin, but they were absent of cold. Neither ever had to worry about where their next meal came from or what could be the next thing to set off the people who were supposed to take care of them. Denji gazed out at the sea where water churned and crashed unpredictably. It was a gloomy day, and it looked like it might rain, so Denji thought most people would say it was a bad day to watch the sea. You couldn’t even see the fresh light ripple against the water. 

Denji would disagree however, it was more often the sea churned against itself agitated. Must be exhausting fighting yourself like that, he thought

Finally Miri cleared his throat, “I like Asa,” Miri said, still facing the water, “But I love Makima-sama,” 

Miri got up then and walked away from Denji and the pier. 

“Be ready for the next week or two!” He called from meters away, a wild smile on his face “You’re about to get your shit rocked!” 

__________

Asa curled up against the couch with Crambon in her lap half listening to Denji on her cell phone. Her posture was completely relaxed as she melted into the couch with her cat. Kishibe almost worried the girl would stick against it like a wax crayon.  

“I just thought that Travolta guy was disgusting. He goes to the bathroom three times in that movie, Denji. Three times! And not once does he wash his hands. We see Samuel L. Jackson wash his hands, but does Travolta?”

On the other line Denji stares dumbly at the Pulp Fiction DVD Menu. His arm reaches behind the couch as Aki prepares breakfast. “But he’s like- cool,” 

“No wa-” 

“The disco part in that- the american place- diner where he hangs out with Mia isn’t cool? He’s the only cool thing there!” Denji interrupts

“Okay I liked that part,” 

“Yeah, when-” Denji stops himself hearing a knock on the door. For one moment, something itches the back of his mind. Like a dog which scratches against the door. 

Then Makima comes through the door, her serene smile immediately brightens up Denji’s face,“Bye Asa!” the boy says slamming the flip phone shut.

Asa scowls at the beep and dial tone, but doesn’t pay it too much mind reaching for the television remote instead. Maybe I’ll drop by Ume and Nana’s today, she thinks. 

Meanwhile, Denji slips the cell phone into his pocket completely forgetting about Pulp Fiction and pops up into the kitchen bar where Makima stands greeting Aki. 

“Hey Denji,” Makima smiles cutely. She’s always cute. “I was just thinking of going on a trip to Enoshima, do you think the three of you would like to come?” her head tilts a little and Aki’s face heats up.

“Yeah,” Aki says casually, taking his blue apron off, “I’ve got all my PTO so we could really go whenever,” 

Makima steps closer looking up at Aki “Great I was thinking-”

Power interrupts from where she sits way too close to the television staring into Samual L Jackson’s eyes “Can’t! Power has an important meeting on that date and time!” 

Makima doesn’t seem to mind the nonsense “But we haven’t picked a date Power-chan,” 

The fiend brings her legs folded criss cross apple sauce up to her ears “Busy all month! And next month!” 

Just as Makima opened her mouth to respond, a large group of soldiers burst through the apartment door and crowded around the three in the kitchen.

 Makima snatched the remote from Power then switched to the news channel. There on the screen was Chainsaw Man attributed the name as news castors discussed his status as friend or foe. 

Denji felt his cell vibrating in his pocket, flipping it open he sidestepped the men as Makima and Aki linked up to quietly discuss something. 

“Yo, Asa,”

“Have you seen the news?” she asked 

“Uhh where they’re talking about how awesome I am?”

“Yeah! But ugh Denji, that's not a good thing,” he could feel her scowl through the phone “You’re like, I dunno, top secret property of the state. Sensei just burned rubber heading out,”

“C’mon it's not that bad. Hey Makima just came by! We’re going on a trip together soon and uh d’you know what PTO is? Do I need that?” 

Makima took the flip phone from the boy’s hand then “This line is no longer available,” she told Asa gently flipping the phone closed. 

“In the days ahead, assassins from countries all over the world will be coming to kill you. All freedoms including this, will have to be closed for the foreseeable future,”

______________

“Can I have my bike back now,” Denji asked (again) bored patrolling with his band of boring body guards following him. 

“No,” 

I think that blonde ass is enjoying this, Denji thought, twirling his hatchet in his fingers. 

“But I usually patrol with Asa ‘bout now, gotta go pick her up. Kinda need the bike to do that,” Power had been dropped back at Public Safety about an hour before, on Wednesdays she didn’t have a double shift like her brother. 

“I’ll call us a taxi,” the blonde guy said. Denji couldn’t even bring himself to remember his name. The four of them, blonde guy, his buddy, Denji, and the weird one, Yoshida, climbed into the car. Denji sat in the middle on the hump seat. Yoshida said it was to protect him if someone attacked the car but Denji was pretty sure they just didn’t wanna sit there. 

He gave the driver directions to La Fille and led the men into the dance studio. There he showed the boys how to sign in and showed them upstairs. La Fille was a relatively small company, according to Asa, that was located on the entire second floor of a four or five story building in downtown Shinjuku. 

After stepping out of the narrow stairway was a wide open lobby with wood floors and plush white couches. Magazines like CUTiE, Shojo Ribbon, Jump!, Asayan, and Option 2 piled up by the end tables. Recently business had been so good after the Giselle production that they finally hired a receptionist Denji waved to as he walked toward the far side where a long hallway led to two different studio rooms. 

Class was about to end, and due to the greater enrollment parents milled about the lobby walking up and down the long narrow hallway peering into the clear walls and doors of the big rooms. Plush benches lined the building wall side of the hallway where more people sat. Mothers with their fussing babies soothed them and salary men took their lunch break to smoke and watch their children dance from there. Denji used to sit in the lobby where it was less crammed until he realized Asa might never realize she was late for her shift if Denji didn’t wave her out of the practice rooms. 

Inside he saw Asa in practice room two, chatting with another girl while stretching. The practice room was large and all three other walls that weren’t clear were mirrors so every dancer in the room was easily visible if you knew where to look. 

After a while, Denji took notice of how the older dancers weren’t required to adhere to a dress code like at work while in the other room younger students looked almost identical. Denji always got to the studio a little early, just before the older girl’s class was over so he could watch them in their leotards and strange fashions. 

Some wore trash bag-like pants or super short skirts. They all wore leotards but there was variety to them with a bunch of different cutouts, sleeves, colors, and necklines, but Denji didn’t pay a lot of attention to that. Denji did know in that big airy room it would get pretty cold and drafty, and everybody dressed for it. Some of the girls wore these long shirtless sleeves that reminded Denji of that character Ashitaka from Princess Mononoke. A lot wore very tall knee length legwarmers that had all kinds of different patterns, and there was always some way the dancers wrapped themselves up with skirts or shawls.  

Denji spied Asa beside a white hair girl with black studs all up and down her ears like that Yoshida guy following him around. Asa wore a gray leo with knit white short shorts and legwarmers over sheer pink tights. Over the leo she had a pink off the shoulder cropped top that was tight against her arms and at the cuff had a loop go around her middle fingers. 

The blonde guy hit Denji in the backside of the head as a woman with three black moles passed him by through the slightly crowded hall. “You’re just here to look at cute girls, pervert,” the blonde said under his breath. 

Obviously, Denji thought. 

“Nah, trust me Asa’s right there. We’re just gonna wait ‘till she’s done,”  

Yoshida relaxed on Denji’s other side, “I’m not complaining,” he shrugged. 

Slowly the young kids group and older girls milled out of each studio with their parents, the crowd thinning until only a few stragglers remained alongside Asa and the white haired girl. Asa must be teaching that girl a thing or too, Denji thought watching them. 

Finally the girls emerged from the practice, "What's with the posse, Chainsaw?” the white haired girl asked in her breathy soft voice next to the bench. 

Denji stared up at her. She was uncomfortably close for most people. “Just some new people trying to kill me,” he shrugged. 

“And who are you?” Yoshida asked the girl

“This is Fami,” Asa replied, also a little too close for comfort between Denji and Yoshida. Almost like she was nervous about this new guy. 

The blonde guy took Asa by the shoulder and dragged her a few feet away. He had a tight grip and a furrow across his brow as he said “Did you tell this girl about Chainsaw Man’s identity?”  

Asa tried to take his hand off her, but to her behest she was shaking a little from the tiring class and (only a little bit) by how the blonde glared at her like she was the scum under his foot. “It's not like it was really a secret-” she stopped speaking when Denji grabbed the blonde guy by the elbow and lifted his hand from Asa’s shoulder. 

“Lets get outta here,” he said

Outside Asa and Fami said goodbye before grouping up with the boys her age, Denji and Yoshida. “Who are those guys?” she whispered to Denji 

Denji rolled his eyes “The one’s keeping my bike hostage, I paid good money for that bike! Enough to eat for months and they’ve got it locked up somewhere, s’posed to keep me safe from all those assassins or some shit,” 

Asa looked around them, Denji was sandwiched between herself and Yoshida, but Yoshida didn’t pay them much attention, more busy keeping an eye watching the busy street. 

“Or more like, use us as bait…” Asa said. 

A sudden noise down an alley way had the devil hunters turn their head, typically Asa and Denji might race to see who would kill the devil first but instead Asa slyly kept a smirk from crossing her face and said “Did you guys see that person? I thought they came out of La Fille with us. Should we check it out?” 

The blonde guy nodded and headed down the alleyway first signalling for the group to follow him. His buddy did and Yoshida stepped to follow them- before he turned his head and saw Asa and Denji pushing their way into the crowded streets and away from the body guards. 

“Wooh! I’ve been trying to do that all day!” Denji cried 

Asa had an exhilarated smile on her face “I don’t think I would’ve been able to make it that long, so where should we go now?”

By then the teenagers had become fully integrated into the crowd and stopped rushing. 

“I dunno, you hungry?” 

________

The entertainment district was much emptier than Shinjuku and allowed the teens space as they tried to find the theater La Fille performed at. 

“Do ya really only know how to get to this place from the theater?”

“Yes now trust me I swear it has the best crepes I’ve ever had! Look, there's the theater now…” 

Asa picked up her pace as she almost jogged down to the end of the street and looked right down the block “There! Right there!” she pointed to a small hole in the wall cafe called Le Cafe Coquelicot. It looked almost angelic in how the plaster outside was carved and how the sunlight perfectly rippled over it like a spotlight. 

The cafe had a shaded patio with a white frilly overhead, and inside was warmly lit from the chilly sunny day outside. The wood and wicker tables and chairs held many middle aged women casually chatting, young women reading, and a handful of 20 somethings on first dates. 

When Asa and Denji arrived at Le Cafe Coquelicot and walked up to the classy hostess stand a young girl popped up from gathering menus below, “Oh! Sorry I didn’t see you, are you part of the Hirofumi party?” 

Asa was just about to say no- when Denji spotted the teen bodyguard waving a hand to them from his spot leaned up against the patio entrance. “I guess so,” Denji said, resigned. 

At Yoshida’s table, Asa could hardly even complain. The cafe was packed and he had gotten them a nice table overlooking a few small beds of flowers along the building. It was out of the way and out of sight so near no one even in the restaurant could spy the devil hunters playing hooky. 

“How did you know we were going to come here?” Asa asked 

“Mitaka, they have the whereabouts for everyone Chainsaw Man even looks at, of course Public Safety already knows where you frequent to drink coffee. I just had to ask,” Yoshida said, taking a small sip out of his espresso glass. 

“How the hell do you drink that crap? Yuck,” Denji said, sticking his tongue out. 

Asa called over a waitress, dressed as a French maid, she knew over to the table. She had come here for lunch, breakfast, a coffee break, so many times Asa was almost sure every employee on the pay roll knew her by name. 

Referencing the menu Asa asked “Could we get two Coconut Lime French Sodas please?” 

“Absolutely and just to reintroduce myself to the gentleman I haven’t yet met, my name is Gigi and I will be your server today,” Gigi had a brilliant smile, glad she lucked out serving her regular Asa. The girl tipped very well!

“Thank you,” Asa said before their waitress left. 

“Yo Asa, why haven’t you taken me here before? Gigi is smoking hot!” Denji said. 

Asa rolled her eyes “Cause I knew you would say that,” 

Yoshida smiled at them “We should come again given the opportunity, I enjoy the jazzy music they’re playing with those sort of rock elements,” 

“Mhm!” Asa hummed melting away her animosity toward this random boy, “When I came here with Fami she asked for the album and said she’d play it at the store she works at,” 

“Where does Fami work? I’ll head over and check it out sometime,” 

Denji reaching for more bread sticks at the table said, “Oh its this cool spot Horsemen we still haven’t found it again though,” 

“Stop talking with your mouth full its disgusting,” Asa scolded

“Huh?” Yoshida questioned “Can’t you just look up the address?”

Asa flipped through the lunch menu, without looking up she said "It's one of those places you come across at the right time,” 

Just then Gigi came back with two creamy bubbly white drinks with piles of whipped cream and coconut shavings on the top. 

“Enjoy,” she said, “Ready to order?” 

“Yes,” Asa said “I’ll have the fig, brie, and prosciutto crepe,” 

“And can I have the small french onion soup?” 

“Uhh I’ll get the french dip-ay Yoshida you treating us?”

“I don’t see why not,” 

“Then two french dips, a ham and cheese croissant, the strawberry crepe, a thingy of madeleines, and a bunch of tea sandwiches yeah that’ll be all,” Denji said pushing his menu to the end of the table and taking a sip of his drink, “Hey this is super good!” he said looking at Asa. 

She smiled at the compliment to her drink choice, “Yeah it's kinda like a Pina Colada, isn’t it?” Asa took the menus and handed them to Gigi. 

“Never had one of those,” Denji shook his head. 

“I quite literally made you and Power some like two weeks ago,” Asa said before sipping on her drink. 

“Nuh uh,” 

“Yeah huh! I specifically bought pineapple for a side and you heathens ate it all,”

“Oh yeah we did! You should make those again, these too,” Denji said, holding his drink up.

“I could totally make these if I tried, I wouldn’t even need a recipe,” Asa said snootily, a little proud of herself as every time she had Power and Denji over she found a new recipe book at the library and would try out the different lunch box techniques. When it was only Denji she could go even more all out since she didn’t have to fight for her portion. 

Yoshida waved his hand to himself “If I’m paying for all this it’d only be decent to give me a sip if it's so good,” 

“No way! This is mine,” 

“Sure, Yoshida you can have a sip of mine,” Asa passed the beverage over when through the corner of her eye she saw Kishibe walk into the cafe. She couldn’t see very clearly but it looked like there was a woman next to him. 

Asa strained her neck to look in through a window that they were in the blindspot of. She spied Kishibe sit down with the woman. The woman was incredibly beautiful in a nonchalant way, who had a pixie cut and eyepatch over one eye. 

As Asa stared at their Sensei with this woman she totally checked out of the conversation Denji and Yoshida had kept going. If Kishibe knew she and Denji were skipping work to go to the cafe he told her about, her Sensei would have her training early mornings for weeks! So, Asa didn’t dare move an inch. But who was she kidding? Of course Kishibe could already tell they were there and would punish them for it… unless he also wasn’t supposed to be here. 

Who is that woman? Asa thought 

“Where?” Denji asked, looking away from Yoshida. Oh I must have said that out loud… Asa thought. 

“Oh don’t look now but I just saw Sensei go in- I said don’t look!” 

Yoshida’s eyes got serious then he forced Denji to face away from straining to look through the window and huddled close “That’s Quanxi,” he said “She’s an assassin from China and Kishibe’s old buddy,” 

“What? I had no idea!” Asa whisper shouted 

“Yeah, maybe they’re just catching up but let's try and stay quiet… I don’t want her to know we’re here,” 

“C’mon can’t we just fight her?” Denji asked

Yoshida shook his head “No, she’d grind you to a bloody pulp. Lets just wait for our food and eventually they’ll leave before us if Denji’s ginormous order has anything to say about it,” 

Asa let out a smile despite her nervously beating heart. Between the three of them it got quiet until Gigi came back with a small plate of madeleine cookies and butterfly shaped tea sandwiches. Asa stopped her then and asked for a hot chocolate. It was sunny out but still cold and she hoped the warm drink could warm her up, as well as calm her nerves. 

After they got their food the teens didn’t have to shiver from fear much longer, (except for Denji who went on eating his food like nothing was amiss) because the old friends left separately quite soon. 

Asa and Yoshida let out such a sigh of relief they totally didn’t notice the blonde asshole and his buddy come up to their table and start yelling

“How the hell could you have left us after we’re here just to keep you safe?? How the fuck are we supposed to do our job when you just wanna run off to the nearest, actually not nearest french patisserie you see? Do you know how embarrassed I was chasing some random German woman and her protege??” He had gone so red in the face the man had to take another breath before he started cursing again. 

The teens looked at each other like they weren’t exactly sure what to do, Yoshida tried to interrupt but it didn’t come out over the roar of Kusakabe (yes that's what the blonde asshole’s name was, Denji thought). When out of the blue a well built young chef came out of the cafe and put himself between Kusakabe and the teenagers. 

“I’m going to have to ask you to leave my diners alone, now,” he said. The man looked college age and had dyed reddish brown hair. He exuded confidence and an untouchable aura. 

Asa smiled and leaned in to whisper to the boys “That's Chef Kiriya! Isn’t he so cool?” 

“Huh,” Denji said. Why couldn’t I react like that? It’s not like I’m scared of this guy. I could knock his ass flat. So why didn’t I tell him to get lost? The boy thought. 

Kusukabe looked around the young man at Yoshida, “We’re headed back to Public Safety, meet up with us later,” he glared then left. 

Chef Kiriya turned towards them, “I’m really sorry about that guys would y’all rather be seated inside? Or would you like a free dessert?” he said with an obvious Kyoto accent.

“No!” A flustered Asa stood up out of her seat then and bowed “That was our own fault and our own drama. I’m so sorry we had to bring that into the cafe,” 

“We’d enjoy a free dessert!” Denji piped up. 

Asa blushed “We would, but you don’t need to-”

Chef Kiriya waved her off “We know you'round here Asa. Whatever that was about I’m sure it ain’t your fault, but if you wanted to pay us back for that dessert there is a part time position open. Even if we all know you aren’t strapped for extra cash,” he suggested with a nudge and a smile.

“You know if I had the time I would apply,” Asa smiled shyly. "If you're so sure about the dessert could we get the chocolate covered strawberries?”

Finally after a long lunch and an annoying (but short) shift Yoshida, Asa and Denji left to go meet up with Kobeni, Violence, Power, Aki, and Angel on some street Asa didn’t understand the relevance of. They were all supposed to wait for extra personnel from Kyoto to arrive earlier that day but the Kyoto Devil Hunters were apparently attacked and they could only meet up with Kurose. 

When they got there Denji sprawled his arms and legs out on the city bench.

“It's so unfair we’re not going to Enoshima with Makima,” He whined, just thinking about it could put him in a bad mood. Asa stood beside the boy rubbing her nosebridge because she had already heard the same thing a million times already. 

“Why do you even want to go on a trip with her?” 

“Oh you can’t judge me after you also are into that guy way older than you,” 

“Are you talking about Kiriya? That makes no sense! I think he’s married!”

“I’d still wanna get with Makima if she was married,”

“So you would cheat?”

Yoshida piped in “Pretty sure that would make you a terrible boyfriend,” he said, scrolling through Asa’s contact list looking for Fami’s phone number. 

“I’m just saying chocolate colored strawberries with all the colors and sprinkles and shit is not what was on the menu,” Denji said shrugging.

 “Why don’t I get to go on a trip with Makimaaaa” the chainsaw boy returned to his moping, when Aki and Power arrived on the scene.

“Ya still talking about that stupid trip? It's cancelled! Forever! HAHAHA” Power said

Aki sat next to Denji, relaxing his back against the chair and putting one leg over the other. “It’s not like you’ll have assassins come after you forever. Makima never said the trip was cancelled its just postponed,”

“Huh?? No fair you guys get a prize after we kill the assassins and I don’t get shit! Unfair, unfair, unfair!” Power cried

Aki shrugged nonchalantly “Okay well after this is over you can drink Denji’s blood,” 

“What?!? My blood ain’t just getting pimped out like that!”

Asa rocked back onto the heels of her feet “I mean it's not like she can suck anyone else’s blood,”

“What? Fine whatever,” Denji grumbled

“WOO HOO!” Power cried just as Kobeni, Violence, and Kurose arrived along with Kusukabe and his buddy. It was pretty awkward. 

Power wandered over with Kobeni to her car. Asa went with them just to avoid the stupid blonde bodyguard and everyone else kept milling around chatting. 

“Hey Kobeni, this is my car,” Power said 

“No, uh, it's not Power,” Kobeni said nervously

Asa crossed her arms “Power get out of the driver's seat, we’re leaving soon anyway,” 

But, Kobeni climbed into the passenger’s seat and Asa found herself in the back. “Hey where’re my keys?!? Did you steal them Asa?” 

“Nope,” Asa said popping the p

“You did! How dare you?? And after I graciously let you teach me the alphabet. Search her! I COMMAND IT” Power said, reaching into the back seat and harassing Asa. 

“No Power… it's fine, I have the keys…” Kobeni said 

You idiot, Asa thought

You idiot! Asa thought again when Power wrangled the keys and drove the car straight into Denji and Kurose. 

“Power! What have you done?” Asa cried. Kurose and Denji were over ten feet away, Kurose having hit his head and bleeding from his skull and nose. The girls climbed out to find Denji still writhing on the ground and everyone else gathered around Kurose’s body. Only it wasn’t Kurose but a man they had never seen before.

“His face changed!” Kusakabe said

Stepping over Denji’s body (he’d get back up sooner or later) Asa walked over to Yoshida. “What do you think that’s all about,”

“Assassins obviously. Three brothers have that face shifting contract, so that leaves two more” Yoshida said, looking around. He took a hand out of his pocket then and waved over for Asa to follow him into a nearby alley. “Another one might still be hanging around I dunno, but we should check it out,” 

Asa followed him- until the dread of what assassins may be down there got the better of her and instead she waved her horizontally for no and rushed over to where Power was running around with Denji’s half healed corpse. 

The only inkling she had of what Yoshida might have found was the wet slap against pavement she heard and assumed must have been one of the octopus devil’s tentacles. 

I need to get out of this industry, Asa thought, shivering in disgust.

Chapter Text

It's not like I was ever a fan of dolls, I mean they’re little and creepy and stupid looking. But I really am not a fan of dolls right now!! Asa thought as she ran faster than she ever had before pushing through Denji and Power up an escalator in the department store they had been stalked into by a horde of doll creatures. Asa felt a little bad for them, since their corpses were being manipulated by the latest unseen force trying to kill Denji. 

“Eeep!” Asa made an embarrassing little sound as a doll grasped Power by the hair and pulled hard. By now at the top of the stairs Denji jumped to kick the thing and dragged Power back up. 

“Hey! I thought you said if it touched us we turned into one of those dolls?” Denji asked

“Yes, I guess that's only for humans then,” Kusakabe said as they still jogged away from the dolls. Angel took out an ornate sword then and slashed a large portion of the crowd disabling them. 

“Okay, well that's not relieving at all,” Asa said 

“Hey, it's better that at least some of us can touch them,” Yoshida said 

“Okay listen up! I’ve called for help so this is our base area until they arrive and we figure out where Santa Clause-” Kusakabe grew quiet when he saw doll heads being slashed off through the big west facing windows creating a rapidly moving path towards them. 

The closest swath of dolls were beheaded- Aki barely protected Angel in time from the violent blur which threw them across the room. The blur stopped and the three teens recognized the woman from lunch, Quanxi. 

There was one blissful second everyone stared dumbly at her- before she dropkicked Denji and chaos erupted as she beat Kusakabe and his partner. Yoshida joined the fray, and put up a better fight before he too had a knife pointed towards his neck. Asa stayed out of it leaping out of the way from the frenzied pit. Wanting to stay out of the way she helped Denji lift himself up. 

Kishibe appeared soon after with two fiends under his arm, knives pointed at their throats. 

“Denji, Power, restrain these for me,” 

With his hands free he sat down at the food court table. So did Quanxi. They stayed quiet, until Quanxi asked where her other fiends were. They chatted briefly before Kishibe held up a notepad that Asa couldn’t read from where she stood. Asa wondered what it said, and if it had any relevance to their conversation. What couldn’t he say? Why couldn’t he speak it aloud? 

Asa’s interest was peaked when Quanxi replied “There’s this reporter on the morning news who’s my type, I always watched her program and I even bought the magazines she was in. One day it was revealed she was lying skank, after that every controversy surrounding her came to light,” 

Quanxi relaxed in the chair. Previously she had looked at Kishibe, but now she looked around the room. Asa could tell the woman wasn’t shaping them up and instead looked entirely apathetic about whatever Kishibe was trying to tell her. 

“She still had her show, was still on every morning… But I stopped watching the program,” Quanxi looked straight into Asa’s eyes for only one second, before flitting back onto Kishibe “You see, the secret to a happy life is that ignorance is bliss,” 

Asa watched the beautiful women intensely. She absorbed the words Quanxi had said into her mind and questioned why she had wanted to know what was written on the notepad. She had an image of Kishibe in her mind, that he was the quiet but sweet father she never had, but what if what was revealed on that notepad proved that idea wrong? 

I don’t want to think about that 

Asa was so preoccupied with the fear it took her more than a minute to return back to reality when a fiend she had never seen before burst through the window and restrained Denji. Kishibe flipped his notepad, tucked it into his pocket and punched Quanxi across the face. The ensuing brawl through Kishibe and a number of others through the broken windows taking a hard fall onto Kobeni’s car.

Power threw the fiend she was holding into Asa’s arms and pounced on the one restraining Denji. 

Quanxi advanced towards Asa, “Stay back! Or I’ll kill her!” Asa cried brandishing the knife. 

Quanxi smiled a little “Mind letting her go for me, sweetheart? I don’t want to fight you,” 

Considering the best option Asa shook- what do I do?? She was saved from making that choice by Beam in shark form crashing into her and then the struggle between Power and Quanxi’s fiend to free Denji. 

Beam and Denji ran off leaving Asa and Power to fight the released fiends. Asa pulled out her swan pin rapier and matched Power in the two vs two band for band. Meanwhile Yoshida had taken on Quanxi once again. 

It was actually not going that bad-until obviously it went terribly wrong. Denji was raised into the air into a crucifix position and crashed back down again, when the German woman and protege Kusakabe had been tailing came out of the department store and started conversing. Asa didn’t notice any of this until after Yoshida was thrown through the window like all of Quanxi’s victims and their surroundings went completely black. 

Everyone froze. Asa sheathed her rapier into the delicate silver sheath the swan pin hanging on hip had become so only the delicate metalwork of the handguard was visible, when a great big hand crushed the department store into hell. 

____________

The first thing Asa noticed was that it was cold. The second thing she noticed was that despite the gentle green hills and strange but unmenacing sky of doors, her chest tied itself in thick complex knots she had no way of untying. It was cold. But she didn’t shiver- afraid even the slightest movement would betray her presence. 

There is this hour-just before dawn- they call blue hour where the entire world is bathed in this soft blue light before the sun rises. As this just begins you may look around and wonder where the light may be coming from, as Asa did just then. Looking for the blue cold light source which bathed the field. 

Dread was the only constant she felt as it swam through her pounding bloodstream. Her and everyone else in this field knew something terrible was about to happen, but they didn’t know what. Other than a good amount of them likely would not be returning home that day. 

 I am going to die, Asa thought, unresigned, filled with fear, wishing she had never met Kishibe, but without any expression at all on her face. 

Asa thought of The Shades Act in La Bayadere, where after betraying his true love, Nikiya, and causing her death Solar goes on a mad opiate trip which ensues one of the greatest White Acts of all time. In this act Solar hallucinates the Kingdom of The Shades, a corps scene which appear to him as many many shadows of Nikiya. 

The girls take only two steps to arabesque then a penche, temps lie, cambre back to lean back out and bring their arms back in such angelic movements repeatedly as they descend from a dark ramped stage as if the dancers are descending from heaven. 

Asa lets this haunting beautiful passage play out in her mind as her funeral procession. Repeating. Over and over. Over and over and over again as she pays no mind to the people around her. 

That is, until her eye flicks over to the little black ink drop which has fallen from the sky. An evil leitmotif picks up in her mind then, a la Katchei, or Von Rothbart.  

Asa tries to curl into herself and pretend this isn’t happening. That the strange blue light comes from the mountains of the Kingdom of The Shades and not this terrible place. She whispers in her mind Ballet Devil if you are there I’ll give you anything at all if I can make it out of here and to class tomorrow

Surprisingly the Ballet Devil worms her taffy self into Asa’s mind Anything?

Anything 

What if I said I am much too weak to do much in the face of a primal fear but I could guarantee you may leave with all limbs intact.

Limbs?? Asa balks at the specificity and rethinks her reaction. Yes absolutely, what do you wish? 

Having allowed the devil anything it wasn’t immediately apparent what Asa had lost until the blue sky went black and praying astronauts were cut in half along a long walkway where the Darkness Devil appeared. 

A frog let out a ribbit in the deep dark unknown and their arms were slashed from their bodies. Asa cried out in strangled pain. Quickly she began to imagine the effects of not being able to dance without arms when strange wet and smooth clay formed around the empty space where her arms should have been, the gray buttery smooth clay perfectly formed new arms for her with all the same toned muscle and strength Asa had before. 

Suddenly, her new clay began to heat and burn like she had never felt before. It started like the warm feeling of sunlight on her skin before developing into a white hot pain steaming in the cold air. Blood from her shirtsleeves dripped onto the stiff glossy white porcelain as it began to crack and shatter revealing creamy white skin without moles, freckles, or scars Asa previously had. Her new arms were soft and hairless. However, Asa did not get the chance to touch the strange skin still covered in stubborn bits of porcelain before watching the primal fear effortless claim Kusakabe, the Doll Devil, Violence, and Beam. 

Denji got up, he tried to fight, and it was useless. Princi joined him, and it wasn’t as Makima unzipped the dead fiend's body from the inside and came out. She made a contract with Hell Devil and was skewered through the heart. Just like that the living hunters and fiends emerged out the other side. 

Shivering. Cold. Tired. Most everyone lay motionless on the rooftop, except for Denji alongside Makima at the bottom where he was compelled to fight again. 

It was early evening when the sky would turn golden in light and cast long dark shadows below, but Asa could not stop imagining the Kingdom of The Shades in front of her eyes. When she stared up into the sky she didn’t see puffy clouds painted in all sorts of soft hues but dancers dressed all in white circling each other and performing for an unseen guest. Aki, Angel, and Kobeni had gotten up by then gathering to watch Chainsaw Man when Asa raised up her new arm and admired it. 

She dusted off the clay scraps when she noticed a delicate script written only a few values darker than her skin on her forearm. Lucky it read only 7 years gone as she read it the only 7 years gone faded but Lucky remained. 

Asa hauled herself up and staggered towards the devil hunters left standing watching the chaos of Chainsaw Man below, but when she reached into her pocket for her lighter and cigarettes her fingertips reacted the same as if they touched thin air. Pulling her hand from her pocket Asa brushed and rubbed off the sharp bits of porcelain from her hands and fingers; only the tip of each finger was still encased in glossy white china. Unlike her feet, when she touched the porcelain digits there was no sensation at all. Strange, Asa thought, but could be worse. 

Still the soft beautiful notes of La Bayadere Act 3 “Entrance of The Shades” replayed again. 

Without sensation in her fingertips Asa took a cigarette and flicked her silver and pink zippo open to light it. As it got darker and the sun began to dip below the horizon, Quanxi (in weapon form) and Chainsaw Man fought against the doll below. 

All the hunters on the roof could do was just stare and watch at the horrifying display. It was a fight without consequence that could theoretically go on forever as each devil regenerated. The others stopped watching to lie down and rest but not Asa. 

 Quanxi took on the doll alone. Asa didn’t let the beautiful woman steal her attention. Instead she kept her gaze on Chainsaw Man wandering over to a small gas station. There he broke the pump and covered himself in the smelly flammable liquid. He sparked the whirring chainsaws against each other sparking himself into a big ball of flames. 

Chainsaw Man was like the Firebird then replicating the climactic moment of the ballet: The Infernal Dance. It kept Asa mesmerized in the fading light at the devil’s ability to get up again and again, destroying the doll. She turned away then and took a deep inhale and exhale of smoke alongside Aki.

Letting her worry for Denji get the better of her Asa looked away and imagined the dancers in the clouds coming down instead. What if he failed? What if he couldn’t get back up? What if I lose Denji? 

“Don’t you wanna see what happens?” Angel asked her, noticing the girl join them. 

Asa shook her head “I don’t wanna see,” 

___________

Inside Le Cafe Coquelicot the lighting was yellow, overhead, and warm. The city scape she gazed at was nothing like the field peppered with wildflowers and human fingers, and no thick glob of ink would fall from the sky. It was entirely unlike hell. It would stay a reflection of a lovely late afternoon lunch. But now- Asa couldn’t think back to that sunny day in late autumn. She only let La Bayadere Act 3 “The Entrance of The Shades” replay again and again in the clouds as she sipped on her coffee and took shallow puffs of her cigarette. 

Once again the dancers take only two steps to arabesque then a penche, temps lie, cambre back. Two steps to arabesque then a penche, temps lie, cambre back. Two steps to arabesque then a penche, temps lie, cambre back.

Chapter Text

Asa had her peacoat buttoned to the top and wore dark blue jeans that flared at the bottom where she stood outside Public Safety. She was grateful for the fur hooded sweater she wore underneath as November had transitioned to December before she knew it, and this was a colder winter than Asa thought Tokyo could be. Soon it would be her birthday and she would be 17. Life came fast, the flinch Asa gave when someone simply opened the door came faster. 

Once again the soft notes of Entrance of The Shades came again, and Asa resolved herself. She marched up to Makima’s corner office, she straightened her hair and coat, and only hesitated for a single second before knocking at the door. “Come in!” Rang the soft vibrato of Makima’s sweet voice. 

Asa bit her lip and opened the door. 

_______________________

The rain pitter pattered earlier that morning in front of the Hayakawa apartment as Denji waved to her from the balcony. Asa hadn’t gotten to see her friend in weeks, not since their trip to hell, so she was excited for this. He greeted her once he got down the steps and she handed him the jellyfish pattern umbrella she was standing under, since Denji was slightly taller. 

“Sucks the only day we can meet up it rains,” 

“Yeah, it's whatever though,” Asa says 

They stay quiet for a long period. She hadn’t seen Denji since he was a big ball of fire. He hadn’t seen Asa since her mind became preoccupied with La Bayadere (even though he didn’t know that). 

“Is Power doing better?” She asks

“I guess, it's kind of hard to tell. I’m not we’ll get back to the way she was,”

“Hmm,” she hummed in acknowledgment “I hoped we could find Horsemen today,” 

“You think we will?” 

Asa brushed herself off “I dunno, I asked Fami if we would. She said ‘maybe’ y’know, they should really make this place more accessible. How do they stay in business?” 

Denji only shrugged “Maybe it's not that kind of place,”

“Not the kind of place to make money? 

“Nah, like they only take cash so sketchy people lie about the money they get and say it comes from that kinda place,”

“Umm money laundering scheme?”

“Money laundry? That makes nooo sense,” He smiled to himself when Asa punched his shoulder

“Whatever,” she said

They went on wandering Tokyo like that for a long while, stopping in small holes in the wall for breakfast, jewelry, records, and whatever next place they thought was cool. Finally though they ended up at Horsemen. The real reason they went out in the first place. 

Asa flipped her fur hood down when they arrived only a minute or so after opening, so the entire store was empty. The teens didn’t even see Fami hanging around anywhere. Inside the gloomy gray light filtered in through the huge bay windows and painted deep dark shadows around the store. 

They split off but after only finding one cap sleeved shirt with hopping bunnies on it Asa wandered over to where Denji had a stack of DVDs beside him. 

“Woah leave some for everyone else,” Asa said 

Denji waved her off without looking at her “Snooze ya lose,” he said reading the back of The Godfather, “Oh I found a good one for you!” He then reached for the movies and placed them in a scattered pile with all the titles facing up. Asa read movies like Scarface, Reservoir Dogs, Princess Mononoke, Clue, Men In Black, The Shawshank Redemption, and Scream. Placed a little off to the side was an older movie called The Red Shoes. 

Asa sat down on the carpeted ground beside him and grabbed the ballet title quickly “I love this movie,” she said smiling, “You’re gonna have to watch it with me one day,” 

Denji smiled too “Sure,” then looked at his watch keychain at his belt, “Ah we gotta get outta here soon. Lets check out,” he gathered the movies leaving The Red Shoes for Asa. 

____________

Makima had her signature gentle smile “Yes, Asa? Was there something you wanted to talk to me about?”

Asa awkwardly fiddled with the bunny keychain at her waist as she sat down across from the woman. “Mhm… I’ve been having, um, a very difficult time after having gone to hell,” 

“So you would like to leave us,” Makima led them to

“Yes,” Asa cleared her throat before asking an embarrassing question “Not only that but I just wanted to ask if there was any way that you might- you might be able to help me forget all about everything that happened in the department store,”

“Hmm, I see. Well with those working closely with Chainsaw Man there is a procedure we have to do that,” Makima waved her hand in a so-so motion, “may help you with your time in hell too,”

“What is it?”

Makima held out both her hands, signalling Asa to take them. “I need you to forget you were ever friends with Chainsaw Man. It's easy for you to keep your fond memories of Denji, but the knowledge that he is Chainsaw Man is wildly dangerous for a civilian to have. Especially after the last month we’ve had,” Makima smiled “and we could easily remove hell as well,”

“Really? Would I still know Denji though? We could still be friends?” 

Makima nodded, “Denji can be just another devil hunter you knew in your time with us, but I’m sorry to say all contact Chainsaw Man has with civilians must be severely limited. If we’re to do this, you can’t contact anyone from public safety afterwards,” she clarified. 

“Anyone?”

“We’ll move you out of Kishibe’s and in with someone else as soon as possible. Do you have anyone you could call?”

“Um, yeah,” Asa said thinking of Ume. 

“Great, now all I need is for you to relax and completely submit yourself to me,” 

_________________________

Asa felt the process in which Ume gladly took her in and she packed from Kishibe’s to her new home was too streamlined for this not to have happened before

Leaving Public Safety Asa felt freshened, and like whatever weighed her down so much lifted up and away from her into thin air. There was something she noticed missing from the back of her mind, be it her strife or something else Asa wasn’t sure of. 

Her whole energy lost its tension, her only sadness when Kishibe hugged her goodbye and told her she was doing a good thing. Ume had been incredibly kind, and when Asa offered to pay half the rent she had humbly only asked for a smaller portion. 

“I’m just so relieved it may not just be me and Nana, Asa. I know you probably don’t wanna hang out with an elementary schooler everyday but really if you could just be with her from time to time is such a weight off my back,”

Asa smiled “Really, its fine and anyway Nana is a very well behaved child,” 

Ume nodded and showed her to Nana’s room. “This is really the only place we have space…” 

“Completely fine, I’ve lived in more cramped conditions,” really Asa was thinking how miserable it might be to live all alone. 

In the bedroom (which Asa assumed was the masters) the dancer set up her bedspread and futon on the other side of the room and began to piece together her short vanity. 

By the time she was done when you walked into the bedroom on the left a small Hello Kitty futon was on one side with the closet along the wall beside it. On the right was a small futon with a pink quilt on top of it behind a warm cedar wooden vanity along the wall. On the vanity was a pink jewelry box and below its desk were some small boxes of Asa’s things. She had a flower shaped alarm clock beside the futon as well. 

Past the bed area was a round pastel carpet that covered the small area right beside the window. In the light there were multiple bookshelves, toy bins, and a barbie dreamhouse. 

The dreamhouse set off a lightbulb in Asa’s mind where she pulled out the unopened Dance Recital Barbie and Kelly set. “Hey Nana!” Asa called “Come look at this!” 

The little girl came running in already in her pajamas and wet after an evening bath. At the sight of the barbie set she gasped. 

“Do you wanna play with it?” Asa asked, to the girl nodding rapidly. So, Asa sent her to go grab a pair of scissors. 

Later that night, when only a weak lamplight lit the room Asa held the small flip phone carefully in her hand. She had deleted all her contacts connected to public safety, Aki, Miri, Kishibe, Kobeni, but still hadn’t gotten rid of Denji’s. He was the person she called the most, the reason for the deflated beat of her heart, and the hesitation that hovered over the delete button. 

Accidentally, Asa maintains, I mean I couldn’t even feel the sensation on my fingertips, she pressed the call button and couldn’t bring herself to hang up. After a long minute or so of soft ringing his voicemail crossed her ears  “Yo this is Denji! AKA the awesome super cool devil hunter himself- uhhh I’m probably fighting a devil or some shit I’ll call you back,”

Asa knew something was different about the voicemail but she couldn’t tell exactly what. Instead of questioning that too hard she spoke into the phone “This is Asa,” she wasn’t completely sure what she was supposed to say and let a long pause follow “I just- um, wanted you to know I guess that you’re my best friend Denji. And you shouldn’t call me anymore. I’ll miss you, goodbye,” she flipped the phone shut with a snap.

Chapter Text

At the ballet studio obviously come December you would expect La Fille to do a rendition of the classic Tchaikovsky’s Nutcracker. At least Asa did. 

“Okay! I’m excited to announce our next show premiering December 25th will be The Tales of Beatrix Potter ballet,” Their new director, Kuronoma, said (the last one had the misfortune of being turned into a doll) 

Asa did a double take from her place on the bar. The Peter Rabbit ballet?? Maybe that would be an easy ballet to include the younger kids in though… Asa thought. She didn’t know much about it, other than that the entire cast consisted of animals. If a company wanted to use full costumes it could get very expensive, but she was sure they would do something a little more contemporary. 

Fami looked in her direction and motioned for her to come closer. The white haired girl whispered in Asa’s ear “Who is Beatrix Potter?” 

“Oh, well she wrote Peter Rabbit,” 

Still with a gentle look of confusion across her pretty face Asa laughed out loud “You’ve really never heard of Peter Rabbit?” she asked

“No,” Fami pouted without betraying her deadpan expression. 

“Okay, I’m sorry for laughing, but we could drop by the library and look at a few of her books if you want? I’d just have to bring Nana along,” 

“Sure,” 

Leaving the studio Asa could see the stark juxtaposition between the three girls. Nana dressed in layers of contrasting patterns and textures that clashed the way little girls who dressed themselves love, Asa in her peacoat, tan pleated skirt, tights, and matching flats looked like a student playing hooky, and Fami who wore fishnet gloves, big baggy black cargos, and a tight fitting long sleeve top advertising some grunge band. The punk girl’s fur trimmed black coat was cropped revealing a sliver of waist between her low rise pants and top. Asa thought she was obviously the most striking person on the street outside of Harajuku with all the accessories clipped to her bag, hair, and belt. She half expected them to be approached by a talent scout looking for Fami. 

The city library Asa frequented was the same as always, only now the cherry trees no longer cast a lovely canopy but branches that jutted into the sky like spears. 

Inside it was much warmer and cozier. They easily found the name Potter in the children’s section which had a wide range of books by the British author. Asa picked out a handful she knew were featured in the ballet, and watched Nana as she wandered around. 

Fami looked even more out of place on the big rainbow circular couch where multiple other small children had found a place with or without their parents to read. Thankfully no one mentioned anything to the high school girls as they looked through the illustrated picture books. 

“I think I’d want to play Jemima Puddle Duck, she’s cute right?” 

Fami flipped through the pages “Hmm then could I play the fine gentleman?” 

Asa tried to cover her smile, why am I so happy when she looks totally dead? she thought. “Well, that's more of a male role. But we could ask,” 

“Yeah, then I could eat you,” Fami slyly smiled 

“Nooo, Jemima gets away! She doesn’t get eaten!” 

“Not on my watch,” 

Asa shoved her and stood up from the bench. “Let's get outta here, I gotta make dinner. Do you wanna come by?” 

“Of course,” Fami said 

They wandered back into the curving stacks of book shelves “Nana we’re leaving,” Asa called, but when she found the little girl sitting in a pile of Peter Rabbit books conversing with her was Yoshida! 

Asa was flabbergasted. Fami nonchalantly waved. 

“Asa! This is my new friend Hirofumi, can he come to our house?” 

Yoshida also nonchalantly waved and stood up. Dusting himself off “Yeah, I thought we could meet up with Denji and grab something to eat together. Total coincidence I ran into you guys,” 

Asa bit her lip “I- me and Denji don’t hang out anymore,” 

“Oh no what happened? Lovers spat?” Yoshida teased

Asa coughed in surprise “What? Me? Denji? No- no way. That's absolutely stupid, it's just I left Public Safety- the idea of me and that disgusting- absurd- but no we can’t. I guess you could take Fami, but no. No thank you I’m making dinner tonight,” she grasped Nana’s hand and pulled her up. Asa attempted to cover up her red face as she gathered the children’s books. 

“Could he come along?” Fami asked, her soft voice barely carrying itself into Asa’s ear. 

Asa looked over at Fami in mild shock, before looking down at Nana’s smiling face. “Please?” the little girl asked. 

Conflicted Asa played with her hair, pulling it over her shoulder with the hand not carrying the children’s books. “Well… I’m not sure. When we get there you could hang out until Nana’s mom gets home and we could ask. It won’t be that long, but I’d rather not bother Ume at work,” 

__________

Actually they didn’t have to wait anytime at all and much to Asa’s chagrin Ume welcomed Fami and Yoshida in with open arms. 

“So, where do you guys go to school?” Ume asked, nudging Asa. The girl rolled her eyes, this had been a drawn out discussion for Asa to go back to school. She obviously didn’t want to. Plus she had dance! But Ume insisted that Asa start in the next month. Nearing the tail end of the school year. 

“We both go to Fourth East High School,” Fami answered 

Yoshida turned his head from where Nana was showing him her dolls, “I didn’t know you went there too,”

Fami nodded halfway through a roll of crackers, “I’ve seen you. Around,” 

“Well that's great isn’t it Asa! You already have some folks to hang out with,”

Asa cringed, but what if we’re not in the same class? I’ve been studying but what if I’m held back?  

Ume looked at Asa like she could read her mind and just as easily roll her eyes and say I get it I understand. You’re going anyway. 

Asa may have complained, if she wasn’t already relying on the kindness of Ume. Hey, maybe, just maybe, if Asa’s lucky she could be in class with Fami. Who was currently working her way through all the snacks Ume put out for the three of them. 

___________________

New school, new uniform. Asa bought most of it with Fami (really she could have dug the one her mom bought her out of the back of her closet… but she didn’t) 

The blue pinafore she wore went down to her knees and she was allowed to wear black flats with it instead of loafers. In the winter a cream colored sweater was allowed to be worn over it with a thick high v neckline so the girl’s scarves could still be seen. On her first day Asa judged herself in the mirror as Nana was running around getting ready too. She had pulled her hair back into two tight not exactly low not exactly high ponytails with a few slightly curly baby hairs sticking out. 

Nervously, Asa pushed the baby hairs around, annoyed at the slight frizz on her head. She tried to wet it down, but failed. Then she put two hairclips in her hair and took them out. She put a bow on one pony- I hate that. She tried a Miffy one instead. Hate that, actually I hate my whole head. 

She took her hair down and judged the bangs that had grown out a little too much but Asa hadn’t had the nerve to cut. Of course today of all days was an unlucky one for her hair. 

Looking over into Nana’s blue dish on the windowsill Asa noticed two pins with sakuras along the side. Asa split her too long bangs into a side part and tucked it behind her ear. She pinned them in place with the hairpins and thought you’re done, you’re done if it looks bad it looks bad I don’t even care anymore. 

She slung her bag over her shoulder cringing the whole way to Nana’s school, cringing to meet Fami, cringing at the Fourth East school gates. To cringing in front of her class… and the chicken devil? Who’s scared of chickens? 

Mr. Tanaka, her new home room teacher, smiled at the class and cheerfully said “Okay class! We have someone transferring in with us today! Please treat her kindly,” 

Asa bowed slightly and tried to make it to the free seat she spied by the window before her new teacher grabbed her by the shoulder. He mumbled something about introducing herself and gestured to her so now she couldn’t make it to the seat unscathed. 

“My name is Asa Mitaka,” she said looking out at the large class. There were so many rows and columns Asa got lost in them looking for Yoshida or Fami, or anyone she might have recognized. 

“Anything else? Got any hobbies?” the teacher asked.

Asa looked away from the people and focused her eyes on the small strings tied into cute bows on her shoes, quietly she said “I dance…” She looks up at Mr. Tanaka pleading that he releases her. When he gestures over to her seat she makes a beeline to the chair. As she sits down she can tell a couple people look at her, but she tries not to think about it. 

Class starts soon after the way Asa remembered from middle school and she brings out her campus notebook and pencil case. It was fun to start collecting school supplies with Denji while tutoring him and earlier that week with Fami. Spying over the heads of nobody classmates, she sees Yoshida… but no Fami. On all sides the desks closest to him are full of only girls, probably his fan club. 

She sets out her binder color coded for different subjects and begins taking notes… only to quickly notice that the class was behind her. While she couldn’t go to school as a devil hunter around what was supposed to be her second year of high school, Asa had gotten her hands on some simple handbooks that would prepare her for the school finals she could take. The girl tried to suppress a little prideful smile- and failed. Still she dutifully took her notes and paid attention, until she felt a little tap against her back. 

Asa tried to ignore it, until they did it again, and when they pulled her hair Asa finally whipped around- to wear a giggling girl with freckles held a note in between her fingers.

Gently taking the note from her Asa placed the note inside of her desk. I don’t have time for note trading, I am an academic weapon, Asa thought snootily. 

Class went by fast, until it was her dreaded break period. Everyone scattered to make little islands, except for Asa. A large group of them huddled around the weirdo chicken she saw when the teacher forced her to introduce herself, who couldn’t stop making chicken puns. 

She spied Yoshida had amassed an even bigger crowd of girls, and a few guys, around his table. Asa rolled her eyes then, of course he was a teen heart throb. But, when you really think about it, all those girls are really making fools of themselves since between school and devil hunting how much energy could that boy even put into a relationship? None! If and only if one of those girls came out on top they would tear the winner’s eyes out for daring to get closer than they as a collective were. You all might think you’re silently rooting for each other but we all know you’re not. 

The freckled girl who sat behind her tapped on Asa’s shoulder, “I see you staring at our Hirofumi-kun. Go ahead you can like him, but just so you know he’d never go out with you,” 

What a bitch, Asa thought. 

She ignored the girl, until, speak of the devil, Yoshida came over.

“Hey, Ayuzawa-san I wanted to ask you a favor?” 

Ayuzawa blushed “Sure Hirofumi-kun,” she smiled, “Whatever you want,”

“Great! Well, I talked to Mr. Tanaka and I wanted to switch seats if that was okay with you,”

“Oh-” she was obviously shocked, “Yeah sure I guess,” 

Quickly the girl gathered her things and melted into the crowd of other girls around Yoshida’s old desk, and the boy sat down in the desk Ayuzawa once occupied. 

“You didn’t check the note,” he said

“What note- oh,” Asa took the little note out of the desk and saw it was a little octopus with black hair and moles like Yoshida. “So?”

“Look at the back,” 

In the teeny tiny elegant script was a note reading rooftop - Fami. 

“Do we go now or…?” Asa asked

Yoshida shrugged, “Our english teacher should come in soon, but lets meet up at lunch,” he said with that creepy little smile. 

“Oh, by the way, do you know what's up with that stupid chicken?”

“Yeah, that Bucky isn’t he cute? We get to eat him at our class christmas party at the end of the month,” 

Asa grimaced “I’d rather just do it now, not like it’d be hard,” 

___________

There was a little awkward tone in the air as Asa, Yoshida, and Fami ate their lunch in silence. Asa was glad she had a scarf, it was so chilly. 

“You gonna eat that?” Fami asked

“I’m not that hungry, you can have mine,” Yoshida said, handing the girl his lunch. 

Without him eating, just watching them in silence, it got even more awkward. 

After an even longer pause Asa spoke up, “So it's just this every day? All day?”

“Not exciting enough for you?” Yoshida asked

Asa only shrugged “I dunno. I just didn’t expect it to be so boring compared to…” she ran out of words the way a mower slowly putters to a stop having run out of gas. 

Yoshida smiled in that weird pitying way, and Fami was too busy eating to say anything so the conversation came to a lull again. Asa began picking at her food when Fami said “Why don’t you join the devil hunter club?”

Asa glared and popped a hotdog squid into her mouth “I quit cause I don’t wanna fight devils anymore,” 

Asa defends she had never seen Fami roll her eyes before, but if she could roll them it would’ve been then. “Thats not the only reason,” 

“It is!” 

Fami smiled fondly, “Why not join? I did, that's where all the cute boys are,” 

Asa’s face turned bright red at just the thought of it “Stop it!” 

“She’s right,” Yoshida said 

“Ugh, you’re just saying that ‘cause you’re still in the private sector,” 

“No really! Have you seen Seigi Akoku? With the eyepatch?” 

“Mmm, he’s right,” Fami said 

“Well I don’t even care about boys! In fact I hate them!”

“You didn’t seem to hate me when I saw you kept the octopus note in your binder…” Yoshida said

“Thats different, he’s cute in a normal mascot way,”

“Show me,” Fami said, so Asa got out the binder and little octopus, and Fami giggled! Actually giggled! Asa hadn’t been completely sure the apathetic girl could do that. It was surprisingly… very cute, Asa thought. 

Asa chugged the rest of her canned orange juice, “I’m going to gym, we have gym next right?”

At Yoshida’s nod Asa rushed downstairs. Digging out the class gym uniform Asa groaned at its sky blue and green colors, just a little ugly. 

__________

In the studio production on Tales of Beatrix Potter acted fast with auditions closing only three days after they opened. Thankfully, Asa earned the role of Jemima Puddle Duck, and Fami didn’t get the fox’s role as the fine gentlemen (Asa wasn’t completely sure she would have made it out alive) instead the girl was cast as the female role in the section A Tale of Two Bad Mice.

At the beginning of class Asa performed her bar exercises peacefully getting into the calming mindset of ballet. She had watched the 1971 movie the night before and was very curious how the choreography might be adapted from those big costumes. In ballet, most of the time, less is more. Except for in a costume that restricts your expressiveness, in that case more is definitely more. 

Kuronuma explained, “While your costume will turn out pretty big and poofy it's still not,” she struggled to find the words, “like in the movie, y’know? So I’d like the energy you have to be I’ll admit a little goofier than we would tend to portray,”

Asa enjoyed working on choreography with their new director Kuronuma, she was clear and concise, but still could be very specific and strict with how she wanted the variation to be performed. 

Practicing her opening variation, it began with a cute little melody where she flopped onto the stage with a gentle leap. Asa landed with her feet firmly on the floor, and she turned her head to look out of the stage with a playful smile on her face, replicating a pet duck who may have done something mischievous. 

There was a pause before Asa leaned her torso forward and began to ‘waddle’ as a duck would step out to put her foot down on her heels and roll that to a flat foot. Asa waddled keeping her arms out beside her over what would be a massive fluffy skirt moving them slightly to the angle she was walking. 

On the beat she brought her arms behind her in that wing stance and got up onto pointe and back down again. When she came down she turned to the audience and gave that mischievous smile again and this continued for a while. 

Alongside the whimsical music Asa performed short little steps replicating a duck wandering around her kettle. In the story Jemima Puddle Duck was watching her eggs and making dinner.

 So, as Asa wandles around their kettle and burns herself, off to the side a younger dancer plays a strange sounding note on slide whistle. She hops up high into the air and back down again. Asa rubs her skirt with a little pout, and goes on dancing in her cute duck way. Only this time the same melody repeats in a minor key (signaling sadness). 

This time repeating the same choreography Asa wilts a little in her performance. She’s burned herself and the eggs haven’t hatched yet! What an awful day. 

Asa dances along, only now the fox hops out and watches her. Through pantomime he declares he is going to eat her, and the variation can really begin. The fox disappears to come back later, and a new melody begins to play. 

Keen ears will notice the references it makes to Don Quixote’s Dulcinea, which is a queenly, elegant variation that Jemima Puddle Duck replicates in her cutesy clumsy way. Asa hops onto pointe and walks with a little pointed toe out again and again. 

Of course Asa is the epitome of grace and beauty as a quirky little duck. 

She comes to a stop and faces the audience where she leaps, the same way an ruffled foul would awkwardly flap out of the water. 

After this comes another reference, this time to the famous four little swans sequence in Swan Lake. Asa comes out of the reference precisely with the whimsical music to the same winglike movement done time and time again in The Swan Lake. She moves her arms over her head and close to her skull then gently pushes them down to her waist, placing them down like a bird. Only in The Swan Lake Odette looks away shyly and in Tales of Beatrice Potter Jemima looks to the audience in her charming silly way. 

She continues on this playful train until Kuronuma motions for her to stop, with a smile on her face. They continue the rehearsal alongside the boy playing the fox, but after that their productivity fizzles out. 

Asa liked this. She liked not having to worry about her frightening boss, or if any of her friends ate it. Asa enjoyed not rushing to her shift right after class. Instead, Asa quietly folded her practice clothes, ribbons, shoes, and other items in her bag watching the other girls casually converse. Asa even occasionally contributed to the conversation!

For a long time Asa held the assumption that the girls in her company disliked Asa. She thought they were probably jealous of her. Really, I’m probably more jealous of them. Hana was going on a date, Aiko and Chiyo were planning a party, and everyone else has such a bigger life than me. 

Despite these feelings of jealousy and her often annoyance of them when they may show up late or goof off during a step Asa held an intrinsic fondness for the girls. They were all so sweet, and they liked Asa! When Hana asked her advice on a variation Hana was practicing Asa had given it with joy. (probably keeping Hana there much longer than she wished) 

Asa had a nervous idea for over a week now… as she sat on the bench of their locker room she twiddled with her hands and tried to get the idea out before everyone left. 

“I-” she was ignored by the other girls, not because of any malice, only Asa was never one to really speak up. The girl would have to wait for a lull in the conversation. 

Nope can’t do that Asa stood up with her blue duffle on her arm and walked to the door. Her voice shaking only a little bit Asa turned around- and couldn’t come forth with the idea. 

Instead she tried again the next day. Originally she had wanted to ask the girls if it was a stupid thing to do but since she hadn’t the courage to have done that Asa frequented the stationary shop nearby the train station. 

Inside Asa looked through many different invitation cards. They had a whole aisle full of green and red christmas cards that said things like love you forever or every christmas we spend together is a dream and other sappy things. Asa was looking for something much more simple. 

She found what she was looking for behind a large reindeer decoration. It was a simple blue card set with snow flakes along the borders. It held a place to write the date and address of the- she hated even to think of it- birthday/christmas party Asa would host.

After their last rehearsal of The Beatrix Potter Ballet on the 24th Asa intended to bring a few snacks and drinks out onto the stage and welcome everyone to a little celebration. Not for too long! Just to maybe kind of sort of celebrate Christmas. And maybe also her birthday which was the same day. Only if anyone wanted to stick around. 

Asa hadn’t wanted to force too much attention on the day, but since you only turn 17 once it could be a little fun right? 

At the end of class the next day Asa handed half the stack of invitations to Fami, “Would you mind handing these to the girls?” Asa asked, “No pressure if they don’t want any… I mean who would wanna go to a party after our… uh it doesn’t matter whatever,”

Fami cocked her head “Will there be food?”

“Yeah ‘course I’ll get delivery or something I dunno,” 

“I’ll go,” Fami said, “It’ll be fun,” 

“Oh- good awesome. Um thank you, Fami” Asa shyly smiled

“If you treat me to the cafe later,” 

“Really? Sure I don’t care,” 

Handing out the invitations to some other girls (and a couple guys) was much more nerve racking than this, but Asa had a coffee at Le Coquelicot waiting for her. Her only saving grace after this day. 

Chapter Text

It surprised Asa how easy it was to find a rhythm in her new life. It equally surprised her how fast December passed by until their new ballet only had a few days until premiere. 

Every morning she rolled up her futon, dressed for the day, and walked with Nana to school or La Fille. At school she ignored most everyone and ate lunch with Fami. Sometimes Asa worried she was intruding on Fami’s ‘real friends’ who would go to the movies or karaoke with Fami but they assured Asa she was welcome. 

It was easy to bleed into the connection Fami had with most people. She was quiet and rather creepy- nevertheless very popular. If Asa ever got out of the studio she might have a rather eventful social life following Fami around. 

What she liked most about the new rhythm of her life was the hours on hours she could spend at La Fille without worry. Asa worked through every variation she could find choreography for- and some where she filled in the gaps herself. She religiously kept up with news on the Tokyo National Ballet, and when she wasn’t dancing she studied like crazy. 

“You invited Yoshida?” Asa asked, carrying her books tight to her chest as the group of girls (Fami’s friends) walked around campus. It was cold so they all wore thick winter coats and accessories. Asa was glad for her fur hood and ear muffs as the heavy dark clouds looked like it might snow. 

Fami shrugged “Well yeah, I invited everyone,”

“Everyone!?” Asa cried. The other girls laughed good naturedly. Fami’s friend, Akane, wrapped her bag around to her front and dug around it producing a flyer. 

It looked relatively similar to Asa’s original invitation, only this was mass printed to advertise the ballet… and the Christmas eve party at Tokyo Public Skate?!

“Why did you change this without telling me?”

Fami’s other friend Tooru smiled “Better to ask for forgiveness than permission,” 

“Well I only promised to get food and drinks for the folks in our company, and what does everyone even mean??” 

“I told all the first year classes that we would have our Christmas parties together, and don’t worry about the food Yoshida told me he could cover it,” Fami said nonchalantly. 

Akane bumped into Fami “Oooh he’s got a crush on you,” 

Tooru squealed then too. So annoying Asa thought. 

Who who who 

“Whatever,” the dancer said before checking the time, “We should probably head to our classes,”

Inside, after the recent destruction of Central Tokyo High, East Tokyo classes had swelled to near bursting. The reason Asa typically spent all free time outside of the chaotic room. From her spot by the window Asa had a clear view of the heavy snowfall that released from the sky. 

It looked cold out there…briefly she wondered what Power and Denji might have been doing. Was Power okay to go on patrol by then? Would they play in the snow, and would they wish she was there? 

Asa hoped the Hayakawa’s had found a semblance of normal in the month after their trip to hell. Maybe they went on vacation, maybe they were complaining about the cold, maybe just maybe they would go to the performance on Christmas. 

No they can’t do that. Miss Makima told me to stay away so I will. I have to. Asa couldn’t let herself hope for more than she deserved. Only now since Fami had basically assured Asa she and Yoshida would take care of everything at the ice skating rink she wondered what the party may look like and who would be there. 

Asa had seen the public skating rink once or twice before, but had never gone in. It was an outdoor rink right in the middle of the park where the city held a Christmas lightshow every year. Tons of couples frequented it and Asa had to assume they couldn’t just rent it out. Just imagining even half of East Tokyo’s second year class there made Asa shiver. Thank god she was a decent skater. 

As snowflakes began to fall in big white clumps Asa imagined the dance of the snowflakes in Tchaikovsky’s Nutcracker. Asa always held a soft spot for that part, when she still lived in her hometown just outside of Tokyo one of Asa’s first roles had been a snowflake (and a myriad of others in The Nutcracker). Asa imagined little dancers falling from the sky pirouetting in sync as they ran around on stage. 

She hadn’t used her contract in a long while, and hadn’t been social enough for anyone to question her porcelain finger tips. So sometimes, Asa forgot she had ever been a devil hunter in the first place. 

Memories from then had grown the slightest bit… fuzzy. Not that she couldn’t remember moments like the eternity devil, crowd devil, or accompanying Denji as bait for the doll devil. But as Asa reached for the exact reason they had been bait or for how they got out of eternity’s hotel Asa had to assume Chainsaw Man came out of nowhere and defeated it. He didn’t originally walk into the hotel with them, right?

Asa found it easy to remember being on the fringes of Chainsaw Man’s battles having often seen him fight. It was cemented how cool the hero was when he crashed into her train car and fought Katana Man. She had been so mesmerized Miri had to drag her out-oh thinking about her dance partner was like a painful squeeze to the heart. 

She didn’t want to admit it. At all. That she missed the people, or that devil hunting hadn’t been that bad, right? 

Was never seeing her friends again really worth her comfortable freedom now? Thinking back only emotionally Asa knew everything was different after her last run in with a devil and the reason that she’d lost all nerves in her fingertips. However, she remembered the anxiety and fear like it had happened to someone else. It was separate. 

It’s useless to think about it. She thought I mean I guess I just don’t get to know what Denji is up to now. 

Despite these logical thoughts she missed him. She missed the comfortable routine they had. 

Asa wouldn’t let herself regret anymore it was worth it she thought, it has to have been. 

Trying to bring herself back to reality Asa felt Yoshida tap her on the shoulder. She turned and noticed it was their break period before the last class of the day with Mr. Tanaka. Has it really been that long since lunch? 

“Did Fami tell you about the party?” Yoshida asked in his effortless cool guy way. Asa pitied all the girls who wished for her seat. 

“Yeah, just now actually,” 

“So what do you think?” He asked “I mean all of our class will probably be there since they’ll be serving Bucky, and with all the new transfer students the park’ll be pretty packed,” 

“Yeah, well” Asa shrugged. She really didn’t care about the change anymore, only hoping the girls she liked from La Fille would have fun. “Are you really gonna pay for all the food? I guess I could bring some…” 

“Nah, nah. I already called the rink and the PTA is bringing most of the food,” 

“The PTA will be there?” 

“Yeah, no. The school still owes me for some devils I killed last year this is just how they’re paying me back,”

Asa tucked a strand of hair behind her ear “You’re really doing a lot for this, thanks Yoshida,” 

“No problem really, I'm just doing all this cause Fami asked,” the boy smiled and leaned back into his seat. 

Asa nodded “You like her don’t you?” she asked with a sly smile crossing her face. 

A rare blush pinkened Yoshida’s cheeks “Yeah, so wh-?”

The teens were interrupted by Mr. Tanaka’s entrance and the Class President standing from her seat. When Asa expected the class to be led in a bow the Class President held Bucky close to her chest. 

“The whole class talked it out,” she said “And we won’t eat Bucky! We all realize we eat living things every day but Bucky is no longer just a devil but our friend,” 

Asa expected, oh I dunno, a heartfelt message? A sit down discussion? Instead she witnessed her teacher jump for joy.

 “Okay! Bucky is hereby pardoned, and will continue to be a part of this class!”

“Now let's forget about math! Go out and play in the snow!” 

As the class scrambled to put on their winter wear and rushed out of the class Asa sat in her chair flabbergasted Yoshida beside her. “Did you know…?” she asked. 

He nodded, “Wanna head outside?” 

Putting on her sweater and peacoat she grumbled but got up anyway. Asa wrapped a white scarf around her neck unconsciously matching Yoshida. Outside she kept the crappy attitude watching the boy and their classmates playing soccer. 

Asa stood in one of the arched alcoves around the old brick school building. She would have to wait anyway for Fami and walk to La Fille together so it was whatever. 

Mr. Tanaka walked up from behind her. He touched the small of her back and asked “Aren’t you gonna go out in the snow?” 

Asa glared “No,” 

“Highschools a lot more fun with friends,” 

“I have friends…” She looked away and stepped out of the shaded alcove to get some distance from her teacher. Just then Bucky jumped into her arms.

“C’mon outta your shell and play with me!” The devil said. She considered it, she looked out at the smiling crowd. Okay, it can’t be that bad she thought running out-

Just to slip and crush Bucky. Yep. Coat ruined. She pushed herself up, Asa had killed plenty of low level devils before. It's not like she ever felt bad about it- but with everyone’s eyes on her throat tightened up and she shrunk inside herself. 

Some recent transfer students turned their heads and went back to playing, while Yoshida helped her up. Everyone originally from the class glared down at her like she had killed their cat. I mean I basically have. 

People gathered around the body. They were shocked, one person cried, Asa had to get out of there. 

Half of her thought Yoshida might come after her- but he didn’t. She physically recoiled from the disgusting smell of blood, guts, and raw chicken. Asa really liked this coat too! Now that she didn’t have a job she’d have to go into her savings to buy a new one. Really Asa only had so much money for high school tuition and her college fund what would she do if that ran out? Maybe she should apply at Le Coquelicot… 

These thoughts swirled around her head as she rushed down the cold snowy streets. From the corner of her eye Asa could see the snow coming down more and the flakes stuck in her hair. Finally finding herself outside Ume’s apartment complex Asa let herself catch her breath. Cringing Asa’s hands touched the goopy semi dry mess on her coat, unbuttoning it and tossing it into the dumpster. Left in her white sweater with a fur hood Asa washed her hands in the rapidly forming snow and checked all over for any other Bucky remains. 

“UGHH” She cried into the sky. Everyone probably hates me now- no they DEFINITELY hate me now. 

Asa rushed into the apartment, careful not to slam the door despite how much she wanted to. It was cold- no one had been there since early that morning. 

She unrolled her futon and screamed into her pillow. Why is this happening to me???

For once in her life she didn’t even want to go to the studio. What am I gonna do now? I won’t even be able to go to my own party. Everyone will be judging me so badly. This is awful. I should have never gone back to school. I wish I could disappear 

This went on for a while. 

Emerging from her cocoon of tears and messy hair Asa checked the time. She still had around twenty minutes until class. If she rushed she would make it.

____________

On stage Asa admired her new costume. The bodice was eggshell white with smooth feathers overlapping its heart neckline. Invisible elastic straps were painted with concealer to hide them, not that anyone would easily see the straps under the pink and blue shawl wrapped around her shoulders. It was relatively short and pinned to the bodice so it wouldn’t get in the way of her dancing. Her skirt was a platter tutu with the same smooth eggshell colored feathers glued on overlapping each other. 

If you ignored the bits of yellow, pink, and blue embroidery the costume could be mistaken for one of a swan maiden and was what Asa suspected the Puddle Duck costume was made out of. 

Asa enjoyed seeing the way the tutu bounced as she moved, and when doing certain steps she could see the stiff layers of tulle stacked on top of each other creating an illusion of a fluffy petticoat. Her tights were a similar white color and her shoes were dyed a mango yellow color replicating ducks feet. Feathers were carefully layered on top of each other and speckled with little rhinestones so they would glitter under the stage lights and then wrapped around her arms. Her braided crown was similarly speckled with rhinestones where it peaked out of the blue bonnet she wore pinned to her hair. 

By that time in the evening Asa was nearly finished before she could go to the party that night. Performing the steps she had all but memorized by then she only struggled to keep her performance joyful as she worried about what would happen at the party later that night. Would they kick me out? Would everyone ignore me? Would Fami or Yoshida even remember it was also my birthday?

Asa attempted to ignore these worries- she wasn’t sure if she was successful until Kuronuma motioned for their record player to stop. 

“Asa!” The director called “The steps are fine, I just want you to come in with a clearer head tomorrow okay?” 

Shyly Asa turned her head and nodded. Backstage she stretched out her arms and back as she walked to where her stuff was propped up against a box of set pieces. Standing there already was Fami. 

The cool girl was dressed in her punk street clothes and on the phone with who Asa could assume was Yoshida. Fami waved at Asa as she picked up her bag and walked with her to the changing rooms. 

“So do you know-”, “Can you tell me if Tooru-”, and “It doesn’t really matter,” were all phrases Asa could barely pick up from Fami’s soft voice over the phone. When she stepped out however Fami had a small red box in her hand. Asa could barely stutter out a quick “Thank you,” before the girl was headed for the door whether Asa would follow her or not. Inside was a tiny little note on pink paper reading happy birthday and a pair of silver earrings. Asa smiled, she hadn’t even expected to receive anything from the girl. Maybe she wouldn’t wear her earmuffs tonight. 

On the crowded rink Asa cringed wearing the too small skates she had gotten in childhood. It was quite an effort to find them in the mess of Asa’s closet- but she was sure she still hadn’t been able to toss the nostalgic items. 

“Merry Christmas!” Tooru cried, waving as she caught up to Asa and Fami alongside Akane who was holding onto her arm. 

“Not a good skater, Akane?” Fami asked

Laughing, she shook her head “No way. Hey, are all these people from our school?” Akane asked. 

Fami smoothly maneuvered around and was now skating backward looking at the other girls, “I dunno,” she shrugged.

“Then who are those guys?” Akane pointed to the outside of the rink. 

Asa turned to stare and nearly slipped on the ice as she tried to keep up with the girls' easy pace around the rink. Through the crowds of people Asa's eyes found Yoshida…and Miri Sugo!

Asa hid her face in her hands quickly splitting her fingers so she could still see ahead of her. “Fami do not tell me I saw who I think I saw,” 

“No, that's Miri,” Fami nodded. 

“Who’s that?” Tooru curiously asked, hiding a mischievous smile behind her hand.

“Nobody,” Asa hissed. She did not want these girls to know about him. 

Fami ignored this “Asa’s ex boyfriend,” 

Squealing ensued as Asa rolled her eyes. 

“It's no big deal” Asa tries to get them to chill the heck out “Just embarrassing. What’s he even doing here?”

Tooru circles the group “Maybe he’s realized he’s in love with you or something,”  she teased. 

Asa pushed her and skated ahead a little faster and closer to the middle of the rink where she spotted people racing and show offs performing tricks. Instead of moping about how terrible a day this turned out to be she focused on her skating faster and faster. Faster and faster and she wouldn’t have to think about it. A running line of don’t trip, don’t trip, don’t trip ran through her mind. 

However, as she made lap around lap of the rink the tension in her shoulders released and she waved over at Fami, Akane, and Tooru as she whizzed by them. In a moment of impulsivity she gripped onto Tooru’s hand who held on to Fami’s who held onto Akane’s and all four of the girls were tied up together around the rink. 

Asa felt the cold wind brush past her face and the fast heartbeat of Tooru’s pulse against her hand. As they circled and circled tension built up around her heart. Asa’s heartbeat too began to quicken with adrenaline she felt run through her veins down her arms and through her legs. It was a rush she hadn’t felt in a long time. A release from numbness. 

Finally in a clear spot of the rink the girls broke apart and caught their momentum against the wall. Tooru and Akane were laughing and Asa felt her white steam breath escape into the night sky as she breathed hard. 

Shivering slightly from the cold Asa pulled out her pack of cigarettes and hit them against the palm of her hand. I don't really have the short lifespan excuse to keep smoking these anymore… 

“Smoke, Fami?”

The girl nodded and Asa found herself under a tree with Fami. The leaves were all gone, and through the branches Asa could see the clear blue night. Not many stars poked through the smog of Tokyo, but Asa found a couple. The moon was bright, and Asa felt comfortable silently smoking with her friend. 

“Got a light?” A familiar voice asked. 

Asa snapped her head so fast it was like she was spotting a pirouette. She half expected Miri Sugo to have tapped on her shoulder. 

 “Denji? You- you uh can’t be here,” Asa said. Her face betrayed her initial happiness and worry.

Denji just smiled. She missed that shark tooth smile. “Pretty sure I already pulled up,” He was still grinning like a kid “So c’mon I know you got a light,” he held out a cigarette. 

Asa took the zippo lighter she treasured from her small bag and flicked it open for him. She noticed they were so close she hardly needed to reach her hand very far over to pass the flame to him. Fami had disappeared. 

“How was your trip?” She asked

Denji cocked his head, sort of like a puppy dog Asa thought. 

“To Enoshima?” Asa specified

Realization hit Denji “Oh, yeah!” His face wilted a little “Yeah, we didn’t end up going with Makima. But I uh, just got back from heading up to Hokkaido with Power and Aki,”

“Hmm,”

Sitting in the silence was a little awkward, but Asa needed a few seconds to think. What was Denji doing there? Didn’t he know he can’t see me anymore? I hope Makima doesn’t know he’s here. Who am I kidding? I bet she does. No, she definitely does. She’s gonna be so mad at me. 

What can she even do to me now?

None of this translated on Asa’s face. Denji took the second to stare at the girl. Was her hair longer? Did her bangs cover more of her eyes? Yoshida had taken Miri and Denji to the party, something Denji was originally pretty excited for. To get away from Power for a minute. Maybe drink and talk to girls. 

Denji had to ignore those plans when he spotted Asa in a chain of other girls zipping around the rink. He tried to look away and ignore her like Aki had told him to do. Had told him they’d have to do. 

He stared at her mouth. Maybe he shouldn’t have, it was sorta rude, but he didn’t really think about that. Denji took another drag of the cigarette. Pochita thumped fast, contentedly inside his chest. 

Plush lips formed words Denji didn’t realize were being spoken at first.

“I um, I missed you,” Asa said. 

Denji's face reddened and his eyes drifted away. He nodded “Me too,” 

The girl bit her cheek “But, you know you should leave. We’re not supposed to talk anymore,” she brought the cigarette to her mouth. 

Denji didn’t want to speak. He looked back at Asa’s face, she didn’t look different but something was. It had to be. 

He didn’t want to be the first person to walk away, and he didn’t want her to either. They weren’t allowed to be friends anymore, which always sounded strange to Denji. What about Asa not working for Public Safety has to do with their friendship? 

It made Denji consider what he never wanted to think about, the future. Obviously, he would work for Public Safety all his life. Until he died, or could he even die? But that was the only thing Denji really knew. Killing devils was his game, he liked it. No, he revelled in it. 

This was his life, Makima had told him to act like Asa had died. In her office after reassigning routes and shifts Makima had said “Mitaka-chan has abandoned us. She has left us and told me herself she doesn’t want anything to do with the organization and employees within it. I suggest you respect her wishes,” 

But Asa wasn’t dead. Logically, he knew she would still be at the 5-9pm La Fille classes. She would be dancing in another show soon. She would be going to school with Yoshida. Ten years from now she and any of his other surviving colleagues would be out in the world. Going to school, getting jobs, experiencing new things. 

Obviously, Denji wasn’t jealous. Cause, if he had all that he wouldn’t get to be Chainsawman anymore. But, he couldn’t say he didn’t want to join her sometimes. 

Reze had taken me to school once, he thought, that had been fun. 

Asa didn’t leave his side. She was very close at that point and had stubbed the short stub of a cigarette against her heel. Denji took his out of his mouth. 

From how close they were there may have been half a foot between them. Less. Asa had to look up at him and found him such a comfortable warm distance away. People shuffled around them and around the tree they stood under.

The dancer felt her skin become even more sensitive to the cold. For once she didn’t want to move and she didn’t want to stay still. They were only five centimeters apart. 

So close together Asa didn’t have to do more than awkwardly whisper “Its my birthday today,” 

“Oh,” Denji’s mouth popped open like he was a little surprised and his breath crystalized in the air, “Sorry, I didn’t know,” 

“It's okay,” Asa whispered. This was a gift enough she wanted to say, but kept quiet. 

He was so close, and she realized she wanted to kiss him. This realization lit her face up like a Christmas light. She took a step away and the magic of their little space with snow melting into her shoes and heat on her cheeks disappeared like Cinderella’s dress after midnight. 

Asa spun on her heel and took a few steps away- she shouldn’t look back. She did anyway. Denji wore this thick puffer jacket she’d never seen on him before. Asa gazed at him probably for a couple seconds too long. Where did he get that? Who gave it to him? 

Not understanding why Asa desperately wanted to know. She finally turned away and ran out of the park without even saying goodbye to Fami. 

She could hear the cooing of a bird from where she ended up out on the street. Without realizing it Asa had begun to cry. The wet tears felt hot against her chilled cheeks.  AUGH Stupid Denji! Stupid Makima! STUPID STUPID STUPID DEVILS. I hate them! I hate crying. I hate this. I hate Makima. I don’t hate Denji and I’m mad about that. This would be much easier if I did. 

Asa was sure the tears would dry there and leave annoying crusty residue the next morning at that point. Grumbling about this Asa didn’t even care that she tripped (of course!) about a hundred yards from the apartment complex.

Right at the feet of Mr. Tanaka and her Class President. 

Mr. Tanaka immediately bent down to his knees and helped Asa up. Why do I feel like… I’m being glared at? She thought. 

“Are you okay, Mitaka?” 

Asa nodded and Mr. Tanaka helped her back up. They told her how they wanted to drop by and take her to apologize at Bucky’s grave. It was quite cold by this point and really Asa just wanted her nose to stop sniffling and to curl up with a warm cup of tea. 

So, Asa ended up following Mr. Tanaka and the Prez to Bucky’s grave. 

It's not like I care that stupid low level devil died. It would’ve gotten stamped out on the street eventually anyway. Really that idiot school board should reimburse me for my coat. I really liked that coat!

The three of them stopped at a light. Well, Asa stopped the Class President kept going and Mr. Tanaka was stuck in the middle. 

A chill ran through Asa’s body. She had felt something like this before, that makes your whole body freeze up and afraid to breathe. Like something in the dark is coming out to get ya. Almost like Deja Vu.

Mr. Tanaka laughed “ Oh yeah, we should always follow the law even at night,” 

Asa didn’t move, staring at the Class President who seemed to vibrate with energy. “You always do this,” Prez said. 

Unconsciously Asa rubbed the swan pin on her bag, but she didn’t know if she would use it. If she really had to or otherwise. If she did she might have to deal with public safety, and that meant dealing with Miss Makima. 

“Mitaka…” Something began to bulge and scurry underneath the class president’s skin, “Did you know Tanaka apologized to the whole class for you? Did you know why he wastes all his attention on you?” her voice began to deepen and change. Asa could assume what was coming, and could probably transform her pin into the rapier and cut off this bitch’s head right then. 

But Asa didn’t do that. She just stood silently staring at what the monster was becoming. I mean, poor days like this are just the cycle ahead of me. I’ll probably get a loser office job. Eventually I’ll settle for a guy I hardly like just cause I’m lonely Asa thought as the monster yelled louder: 

“Did you know that Tanaka likes YOU even though HE’S HAVING SEX WITH ME?” the class president revealed how she had been the one to trip Asa and went ballistic. 

The worst pain she had ever felt. The most relief she had ever received. It was better than any masturbation or orgasm she ever felt. 

With her brains sprawled out across the pavement, Asa thought Oh. People… are jealous of me. Oh. I guess everybody’s jealous of somebody. Oh. I really wish I could’ve been just a little more-

A bird (yes an actual bird) stared across the pavement into Asa’s partially crushed eyes. The bird was lithe and small. White like a dove and then black like a raven as Asa waved in and out of consciousness. 

“Selfish?” it finished for her.

Chapter Text

Frost spread across the windows of Asa’s room. Underneath the covers the girl felt as if frost was spreading across her shoulder blades and down her arms. With her weak and sore limbs Asa climbed out of the futon shivering and rushed over the heater. 

Looking around Asa could tell Nana and Ume had left the apartment scarce since all the lights were off leaving dark blue shadowy light filter through the dark blue curtains. The TV was left on playing Sailor Moon. 

Asa could tell she was wearing the same clothes as the night before… Was it all just a dream?

“This is no dream girl,” a near exact replica of Asa said, turning up the TV volume. She was relaxed against the couch wearing the same clothes as Asa- only her hair was down and a jagged scar crossed her face. 

In the hallway Asa tripped over her feet backwards landing on her bum, “Ow,” 

The girl appeared leaning over Asa. That was when she noticed the frightening deep eyes with rings around them.

She pointed at Asa “This is your reality so hurry and accept it,” Then like a lecturing mother “Now eat and go to class, disobey and I’ll kill you,” 

Bewildered Asa sat stupidly with her mouth open. Quietly she pinched herself and the Asa-double smacked her hand away only the hand, the double’s hand, passed right through her. 

“What are you?” A devil? 

The girl ignored the question glaring down at Asa “You died yesterday. I am the War devil and I have claimed your body,” 

Asa kept sitting. Kept staring. Could hardly move. 

War walked back towards the TV and relaxed on the couch. 

I’m…dead? Like a fiend is dead? Is this how all fiend hosts feel? That can’t be.

“I left half your brain intact!” The devil called across the room, “Now get going! We don’t have all day!” 

Asa pushed herself up and went back into her room. Unfamiliar raindrops of ideas and thoughts dripped into her consciousness. 

Are these your thoughts? 

Yes. The devil thought boredly. 

Asa undressed and put on a baby blue pair of tights and white leotard with a very short skirt attached. Why… uh why- why do you want to go to school?

Not school La Fille you need to go to La Fille. 

She dug through a drawer of legwarmers as adrenaline shook her whole body making it even harder to find what she needed. 

Why?

Chainsaw will be there duh. The Devil explained Recently he’s been sighted fighting devils around there more than anywhere else. 

Privately to herself Asa remembered seeing Denji and Power after class. They typically patrolled there all together. Except now Chainsaw Man must have been assigned the spot- so Asa wouldn’t run into her friends. 

The devil walked into her bedroom and got so close to Asa it was like a snake had curled around Asa. Asa could see then the devil was slightly translucent and shimmery like a mirage against Asa’s corporal form. She hissed in a breath Asa didn’t know she was holding 

“Do you know who Chainsaw Man is? I picked you for your brief time at Public Safety. But there's an ugly block on everything I need, how useless,” she slinked away. 

Asa… Asa didn’t know. But something in her told her she should know. Where did that come from? 

The devil bit her fingernails “That bitch Control,” she muttered. Asa shivered from the devil’s harsh tone. “My sister always covers her tracks…”

Shyly Asa looked away and said “Stop biting your nails. It's a gross habit,” she only hoped the devil wouldn’t kill her over that

The devil glared, but stopped. 

At the theater (not La Fille) she couldn’t help being distracted by the grumbling devil in the audience. In the wings after her session on stage the devil appeared beside Asa, she was beginning to get tired of this feeling of being watched at all times. 

“Ask them if Chainsaw Man will be here,”

“No way, they wouldn’t know,” 

“Just do it girl!” 

“No! And stop calling me that!” 

The devil glared “Then I’ll do it myself” she pushed Asa and where her semi translucent form pushed into Asa’s body Asa was pushed out. 

“Hey! Stop that!” 

The devil bumped shoulders with the boy playing the fox. “Hey, boy,” the girl confidently cocked her head like Asa would never do “Do you know anything about Chainsaw Man coming here?” 

He laughed, Asa was never this bold with him before “Nah, if anybody knew you would right?” 

“Hmm shall I make you my boyfriend?”

Asa was mortified. 

He casually shook his head smiling a little, “Nah, I don’t intend to quit La Fille,”

The devil groaned and pushed out of Asa. Immediately Asa’s face brightened red and she looked away from the boy “Sorry, I didn’t- I uh… I’m sorry there's something wrong with me today,” 

When he walked away from the wing Asa turned to snappishly whisper in the devil's face “Why would you ask him out!?”

“I can turn what's mine into weapons, if that boy fell for me it would make him mine, no? So I could turn him into a weapon,” 

I’m in some serious shit. This is bad, this is really bad. I can’t call Public Safety… should I ask Denji or Kishibe? 

“Spill the beans on me, and you’re dead” the devil snapped. “We’re gonna start patrolling the streets and find Chainsaw Man,”

Asa was too stunned to speak, she felt as if she’d jumped out of the pan and into the fire. 

“Good, you're understanding the situation. Don’t worry, if we can beat Chainsaw Man I’ll return your body,” 

Asa shivered at the idea. There was nothing she could do, only a hope that this devil wouldn’t ruin her reputation and end up killing her.  Oh, what am I kidding? I doubt if I’ll make it to next year… 

“Oh calm down you’ll last that long,” 

Asa took a deep breath. She wasn’t going to talk to the air again and have everyone look at her crazy, then would you stop calling me girl! I have a name you know, Asa. A-S-A, Asa. 

“Well you don’t call me by my name,” 

War Devil is not a name! Plus it's weird and awkward. Asa thought as she walked away from the stage to sit alone in the audience. It was empty, and nice to watch Fami and her fellow dancers perform. 

“Fine!” The devil said a smile forming on her face “Then I shall allow you to call me Yoru,” 

Asa turned her head to study the Devil’s face. It reminded Asa of a child who was so excited to play a trick on someone. Her scar crossed Asa’s nosebridge and was perpendicular with another slicing down the left side of her face. Asa remembered the pain of receiving it, did Yoru? 

“Yes, Asa. I remember,” 

________________

Later in the afternoon Asa had gotten into costume and the dancers had done a couple dress rehearsals by then. A handful of students hadn’t gotten out of school and would join them very soon. She wasn’t as nervous as she had been for Giselle since this production was much smaller and many supportive young families would come see their small children dance as well. 

Yoru was having none of it. Why do you even like this crap? 

It's a beautiful artform! Basically every style of dance is improved upon by having a background in ballet. It promotes discipline, balance, and spatial awareness. Not to mention its hundreds of years of history starting in the 15th century! 

Whatever… Hey, wait- Yoru suddenly pushed into Asa’s body and leapt from the stage into the orchestra pit she rolled underneath the wood and metal stage. Before they even hit the ground Asa heard the sudden LOUD ratatatata explode through the theater destroying the stage, seats, and leaving the iron smell of blood radiating through the space. 

From her space pushed out of the body Asa stared in shock from underneath the cover Yoru could find. All the sets they had worked so hard on were destroyed, and Asa could see people struggling to get up and calling for help. 

Nana! Asa immediately thought of struggling to enter the body and go look for her. She didn’t remember where the young girl was, had she gotten out of school yet? When was Ume getting here? I don’t know, 

Yoru didn’t let her go, Those humans are safe. Forget about them and lets go. 

The devil pushed herself up when she was sure the gunfire had stopped. Casually she rolled out her ankles around where the ribbons of her pointe shoes stopped. It was difficult to walk like that so Yoru quickly hopped on one foot to untie them and pulled them off carelessly dragging them by the ribbons low to the ground. 

“Those are expensive!” Asa said

“So?” Yoru laughed her porcelain feet only covered by the white tights, something Asa was careful never to do, “Wherever Gun has come out to play Chainsaw Man will follow,” 

She found Asa’s bag and ripped off the swan pin. The bag had been partially obliterated by the gunfire, but Asa didn’t notice staring at the bodies of her classmate Sakura and the man she didn’t know full of bullet holes. Underneath him was a shivering crying woman Asa thought may have been her director Kuronuma. Somehow pulled along by Yoru’s determination Asa watched herself push the swan pin into her hand puncturing the delicate skin. It was surprisingly very well stuck and sharp, leaving a pinpoint speck of pain hyperfocused on the middle of her hand. 

Outside the streets were nearly obliterated. People were quickly bleeding out on the side of the street and cars that had been shot let out explosions which triggered huge fires and clouds of dark smoke. 

“Where are you going?!” Asa asked

Yoru ignored her, swinging the pointe shoes in her hand, pretending to whip them. 

“Yoru! Where are we going?”

Yoru pushed her flat hands together agitating the swan pin, then twisting them to clasp her hands and push the pin further into her hand. Like a button the pin popped out of her palm and transformed into the rapier Asa knew well

“We’re finding Chainsaw Man,” 

____________

By the time Yoru found the most torn apart area of town Asa had a strong sense she had been there before. As they got closer and Yoru began to run her fluffy tutu bouncing as she did she heard the buzz of chainsaws. 

Around the corner they saw him. Chainsaw Man. He was locked in a stalemate with some sort of fiend. It had a gun for a head and AK-47’s for arms. Immediately Assa recoiled at the sight of it. 

No way she’s strong enough to fight that. But Yoru did anyway. She invaded the scene with a cry of “Pointe shoe urumi!” and the shoes she was carrying transformed into a long katana like sword that was bendable like a whip but made of thin sheets of steel.  The actual blade despite being metal greatly resembled the ribbons of a pointe shoe and the handle wrapped around Yoru’s hand with multiple layers of pink satin. 

However after the first hit Asa never got to see the whip sword, her hands were cold and chapped after having thrown a snowball at Denji. He was small and young, wearing that orange puffer. 

Asa was much younger as well, engulfed in a too big sweater and jackets that had a ballerina pattern printed all over it. 

“Asa?” Denji’s attention was taken by the girl’s attack before he struggled to evade a number of snowballs thrown by a very young Aki.

Tears welled up Asa’s eyes. Why was Denji and Aki here? Why did she have no control over her body? What was going on? 

Flashes of reality passed her brain. Chainsaw Man was there. Chainsaw Man was fighting the Gun Devil. Yoru jumped high into the air and twirled with the whip, inflicting a series of thin, heavily bleeding cuts up and down his torso. She hit the gun as well and he shot at her.  

Asa could feel the cold nipping at her nose and begin to run “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to!” She yelled to Denji as tears began to slip out of her eyes. She threw another snow ball missing both of the boys. 

“Are you playing too?” the young Aki excitedly asked. 

Asa nodded packing another ball

Yoru took cover, scraping their skin against nails and other ruined remains of buildings and houses. She pushed herself up and whipped the urumi at Gun’s shoulder blade, lopping off the gun. 

Chainsaw Man took the opportunity to kick Aki with his chainsaw leg, throwing him into the bodies of citizens bleeding out from gunshot wounds. 

Asa threw snowball after snowball, blindly fighting Denji and Aki. Her friends. The people who had been so kind to her while she was at Public Safety. As she threw snowballs and slowly forgot about the consequences of those actions and began to just have fun. 

Aki was laughing, something she had never seen him do so freely before. So was Denji and her. They hit each other with snowballs and got soaked. 

Yoru whipped her blade around an electrical pole still standing and skewered her rapier through the fiend’s head. He easily pushed her away-

Sending her crashing into Denji. Together the two kids crashed into a huge snow bank Asa was shaking and exhausted. Flashing back into reality she could tell her puddle duck costume was dripping of blood and Chainsaw Man was much worse for wear. 

Asa poked Denji’s cheek. She whispered to him “I’m too tired to keep playing,”  she stared at his peaceful face. It was gentle and relaxed, no longer in pain. 

Lying on Chainsaw Man’s back torn up to pieces Yoru lost control of the body for a split second and was dragged away from Chainsaw Man. The surviving people surrounded him “I saw you on TV” they said “I don’t want to die!” one woman took a long sharp knife and cut open her hand letting the blood drip into Chainsaw Man’s mouth. 

“Save us, please,” 

Asa crawled over to the people and where her open wounds absorbed the blood her body healed. She reached her good hand to the starter cord and pulled. 

Covered in snow wet and freezing but still smiling, Aki was still making snowballs “Did I win already?” He asked

But Denji got up and Asa passed him snowballs to pelt at Aki. They hit him mercilessly, the snowballs exploding to wet icy flakes over his coat and jacket. Aki laughed “Great shot! Take this-”

But he didn’t throw it. Asa watched from her spot by the snow bank exhausted all the snowballs Denji pelted at his brother. Snot and thick ugly tears fell down his face. 

“Hey, how come you’re crying?” Aki asked “I’ve never… seen you cry before,” 

Aki just let the snowball break on his head and purposefully collapsed against the snowbank a few meters away from Asa. He watched the crystalized puff of his last breath float up and evaporate into the air. 

“Okay, I lose. This is no fun anyway,” 

From where Yoru laid in the rubble she saw Chainsaw Man skewer the Gun Devil. Damn you Chainsaw she thought weakly before passing out and giving control of the body to Asa. War would have to become much stronger before she could take on the hero of hell.