Chapter Text
TW// THOUGHTS OF SUICIDE AND DEPRESSING TOPICS. DONT READ IF UNCOMFORTABLE WITH IT
Here I am again. Back at this same rooftop of the hospital that I seem to always be at no matter what happens. I wish it wasn't like that though, I wish I wasn't at this hospital like a sick person but.. thats what i am.
I wanted to do normal things, that normal people do, that normal kids do. At least I think im still a kid, I don't even know anymore these white walls and the smell of freshly cleaned floors is all that floods my memorys of childhood, most of my childhood was at this stupid bland hospital. No point of thinking about it now I suppose.. whats the past is the past its not like it was my fault nothing i can do or change about it. I come to this rooftop to look at the empty vast cold void above filled with bight hopefilled stars, those shining lights that are said to filled with hope and dreams, the hopes and dreams of those before us, that they wish for all to be good, to be filled with hope like the one they give us. I wish to them every night, I wish with the little bit of energy that i have for this world, wishing that things could be different, so different that i wouldn't have to look at the white walls all day that i call my room.. that i could look at a beautiful purple room with fields of painted flowers that would be called my room.. at a house.. not a hospital..with my parents and not doctors, that maybe in another life I could be normal.. a different life where I could have pursued my dreams..instead of only dreaming of them every night.. But then again it's only a wish
Not a miracle.
Miracles only happen to those who need it.
Not those who want it
"I should probably head back now.." I stand up from the edge, I look at the sky, only for a moment, thinking 'Is this how far i get in life..?' Then I look back at the ground, the ground thats filled with people, normal people. People that had a chance at this game we call life, people who could pursue their dreams, except for them its not called dreams, its their reality. I stare once more, it's about a 20 story drop, no one could survive, not even if you had a miracle. ' Maybe I could just start over.. from the beginning. No one would miss me.. not the doctots.. not my friend.. not my parents... And the doctors won't have to waste their energy on me anymore, plus I'm already so close to the end anyways as they put it..'
I shake off these thoughts and i push them back to my head just like I always did, these pure nonsense thoughts that are good for nothing. Of course people care about me, at least I hope so, I have friends.. they have to care.. right? No point of thinking about it. I turned to get off the edge before I do something undoable .. but before I could even think.. before I could even say sorry to everyone for taking so long once again, they aways said that if I stayed put too long I could catch a cold
Looks like they don't have to worry about that anymore
.
.
I felt a push on my back
next thing I know
Is the wind pushing past me
I hear the gasp from below from who got their dreams.
I hear gasps from those who got a chance.
I hear the screams from below from who had their childhood.
I hear the cry of my mother.
Then
Black.
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I open my eyes, at least I think I do. I couldn't tell, it seemed like I was in the void, the void of pure black except this time.. there was no stars to wish upon. No stars to put my hope in, no stars to show that they have hope for me.
So this is death huh? I knew it would come soon but not this soon. Its too soon. I was only 19. I could have gotten better, i could have done something. But even I know that i could never do anything. But honestly this was not what I was expecting when I die.. just the black empty void that i stare at, and it seems to stare back until it did. There was a voice. A voice that seemed to be everywhere but nowhere at the same time.
"Whoa my first soul!"
"Hold on mortal I have to get my script! I have get this perfect!"
.
.
..what? Is this higher being I'm hearing or just some voice in my head.. They sounded.. excited? Is someone that excited that someone died? Gezz what nice gods we have.. though while they seem to be gone I can process my thoughts of what's even happening-
"OKAY IM BACK!!!"
Nevermind.
"Hello mortal!! As you can tell you have died [though your more calmer then I thought], i will not say how you have died as that goes against the rules"
"You are part of the very few that have a chance to start anew! To start again!"
Really..?
"YES!! ISN'T THAT EXCITING!!!"
I finally have anoth-
wait.
You can read my thoughts??
"Yup! Handy isn't it? Its so much easier to talk!!"
Ehh.. sure..(kinda creepy though..)
"HEY IM NOT CREEPY"
oops..
"ANYWAYS!! I have seen the way you lived in your past life, you lived a life at most would consider sad, but you were still a good person and [somehow] still hopeful, so im giving you the chance to be reincarnated into another world. Along with some wishes of your choice!"
Reincarnated..? I thought that wasn't possible
"WELL IT IS!!! ISNT THAT COOL!!"
I guess.. anyways I can just pick any world?
"Yup! Anyworld you want, Whether that video game or a movie! It doesn't matter!!"
I tried to think of where I wanted to go.. but it was pretty hard. I'm not the biggest fan of movies.. though I did like games! Maybe I could go with that. But which one is the bigger question.. well it was until I remembered one game that filled me with endless joy (and rage)
Can I pick phighting?
"Hmm let me see and- OF COURSE YOU CAN!! I SAID ANY WORLD!! DO YOU NOT LISTEN?!?"
Im sorry i-
"Just kidding!!"
Oh.
"Now you can pick any ability or perk that you want [with reason of course] and cuz your my favorite I'll give you 3 different perks!!
Wait how am I your favorite
"Your the first soul I get to reincarnate. And that means your my favorite!! And it also means I can brag to all the other gods about my Acolyte now!"
If this god had a face I pretty sure it would be smirking..
"I am smirking!!"
Anyways... can I be able to fix my disabilities..?
"Hmm depends and what you want to fix!! And how many!!
Okay.. can I fix my leg? So I can run?
"Sure! But that will take one of your slots!!"
That's fine.. let's see.. can I have a umm.. aura.. [ I think that's what it's called..] that naturally makes people put their guard down around me?
"Oh do you plan to be a Social butterfly?? That's so co-!"
No.
"Oh-"
I just don't want people to think im suspicious or anything, I get nervous around people
"Oh okay!! I can do that! Now your last perk?"
Hmmm.. Oh! Can I shapeshift?!
"Ehh.. well I know [BEGINNING] already has a Acolyte that can shapeshift.. and I don't want to copy.. OH I KNOW!!!! what about you can only shapeshift your arm? does that sound a okay?"
Hmm.. I suppose that's fine.. but sense I can't have my full wish can I have a small one instead?
"Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..."
"SURE!!"
Okay can I have unlimited craft supplies? Like things for making clothes and such..! [I always loved making very beautiful clothes, it was mostly just sketching them though..]
"That sounds fine to me!"
"Oh and I almost forgot!!! What gear do you wanna have?"
Gear..? Oh wait I'm in the world of phighting.. all demons have a gear..
Just surprise me I suppose
"YAY I LOVE MAKING SURPRISES!!"
"I'll make sure to give you something good!!"
Thanks.. umm.. wait what even is your name? [If you even have one..]
"Oh just call me [SPAWN]!!"
Okay uh 'spawn'
Thanks for this chance
"NO PROBLEM ACOLYTE!!!"
"ANYTHING FOR MY FAVORITE!!!"
"Anyways I'll be sending you off now! Try to live this life to the fullest!!"
I will
I definitely will
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This bed feels very comfortable, i dont want to move, i dont want to lose it again. It feels way better then the sheets of the hospital. They feel like the sheets I always imagine I have one day but they feel better then i imagined, the feeling of comfort of a home, a family and not a hospital with doctors. Except this time it's real and not my head playing with me again.
I get up from the comfort of my bed, I let my eyes adjust to the warm fuzzy light, not the bright white light and the loud noises that would blind me and wake me up instantly, but a warm comforting light and the sound of a comforting silence, the silence of my own breathing, one that i call home, the home I could ever dream of. I look around a bit taking in the sight of home, my home, it seems to be a small, cozy, neat apartment.. which is way better then what i ever wanted in life
so it wasn't just a dream..It's all real.. All this is real. The home I'm in, the comfort i feel, its all real, and not just my imagination going wild when i sleep in the hospital. I feel tears run down my new face, real tears..not tears of pain.. not tears of sadness.. tears of a new life.. tears of a new me
That's right.. I'm a new person! A real person that can live life to the fullest. I get up and run around the apartment to find a bathroom, I feel the feeling of running for the first time, its nice. I can feel both feet touch the ground and i start to lose my breath.. not out of sickness.. but out of exhaustion.. like a real person. I find a bathroom pretty quickly and it's actually pretty nice, it still has that warm fuzzy comforting glow that everything in this apartment seems to have.
I look in the mirror to see the new me, not a person but a new demon
