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"Samarie you almost done?" Marina asked sweetly behind a door.
"Y-yeah! J-just showered, I'll get dressed," Samarie replied.
Marina was outside in the living room with a few friends. It felt.. Weird. Having friends, or people in her life in general. People who wouldn't hurt her. People who won't hurt her ever.
She looked in the mirror. She was in nothing, nothing but a bra and some old underwear that no longer fit her properly. They were tight, uncomfortable but.. It felt good being able to feel that.
Samarie always thought she had her life "planned" out. Die. Die young, if she was lucky die with Marina by her side. She was so sick. So scrawny her ribs poked out. So scarred up she was nothing but cuts and sigils. So tired she would pass out for days sometimes. The seizures, the aches, the thinned hair. She was on the brim of death.
But.. She didn't die.
She was making a slow but sure recovery. She quit most magic and such cold turkey. Started seeking medical and religious help and healing. Marina helped her with hygiene and actually finding her place in the world, aswell. Well, after months of the two properly starting to connect instead of just stalking.. And many apologies for that.
Samarie stopped feeling so tired and queasy. She still had her rough days where waking up was all she could manage, but there was a noticeable improvement in her stamina and immune system.
"Mh.." Samarie hummed, checking herself out in the mirror. She's never had the confidence to do so. For a while Samarie would cover the mirror whenever Marina was away, usually with a blanket or towel. Now, she stared. Stared at her own reflection. Not in disgust, pity, sadness, guilt..
But she liked what she saw.
She stared at herself in awe.
It still felt dirty liking herself, but.. She didn't hate herself. Her hair was still thin but it was more durable than before, far less tangled aswell. Her once sunken eyebags were now slightly dark circles beneath her droopy eyes. The scars, both self inflicted and not, were finally fading. She relapsed rarely, but those were properly tended to. Originally Marina had to help, but Samarie began to manage helping herself recover. On her own.
She still stunk here and there but her hygiene was far more kept. She would try to shower at least once a week on her rough days, usually she'd try every 2 to 3 days. To some it may seem as if she was still "dirty", but it was a drastic improvement, especially given her illnesses. Physical and mental.
Her favorite part, however, was how her body changed. Well, favorite besides feeling alive that is. She began to develop a proper appetite which began to lead into a slight gain in weight. She still wanted to be a bit heavier, but she had gained at least 40lbs within the past 2 years or so. She was still quite the scrawny little thing, but she definitely was less skeletal and sickly. Her cheek bones sharp contrast softened a bit, her thighs were losing the gap they once had, her hands and feet were no longer pure bone and skin, her spine was less visible along with her ribs, she had a slight tummy, and her hips were filling in a tad. Again, she was still very skinny, but it was more than enough for her to be.. Admittedly proud of herself.
She stared in the mirror some more.
Admiring.
Reminiscing.
Sure there were some days where she still despised herself, both appearance wise and in general. But, the days of that being her constant state were behind her.. Now she could live life.. Be free. Free from the torture of the Ninth Circle. Free of her self hatred rooted deeply in her. Free of the pain her ill body brought her every day. She could be happy. Just.. Happy. Not alone. Not scared. Not sick. She had friends. A girlfriend. A life.
..
"Samarie you okay? You were taking a while and-.. Whats wrong?" Marina asked, walking in on Samarie crying naked as she swiftly shut the door. It made Samarie jump a bit in surprise.
"H-huh?"
"Your tears?" Marina pointed out in concern.
Samarie felt her cheek, looked into her dark eyes reflected in the glass, before turning back to Marina, a small smile forming on her face as a giggle bubbled up. Marina looked at her in confusion.
"Sorry s-sorry just... I.." Samarie swallowed, as it was still hard to admit. But..
"I like how I l-look today."
Marina said nothing, she just smiled and hugged Samarie tight. The embrace warm. A congratulations of sorts. Marina and Samarie shared tears for a bit, before choosing not to leave everyone waiting. Samarie got dressed, still admiring her reflection, smiling at it. Smiling at herself.
She had emerged.