Chapter Text
Chapter 1: Ursus Maritimus
Audrey Hall was writing an address on a parcel label in her café, The Drovers. Just as she finished, her employer, Siegfried Farnon, burst through the doors. She hastily hid the parcel behind a large box of fruit and veg on her counter.
Siegfried was wearing his raincoat, grey jumper and very muddy work boots. His hair, which had been neatly combed back this morning, was now rugged and curling in soft waves around his temples and nape.
He didn’t normally mind Audrey running personal errands during the work day, and they hadn’t been particularly busy anyway, but she hid the parcel all the same.
“There you are,” he said warmly.
“Where else would I be?” she said. “I work here.”
“I don't suppose you've seen my glasses?” he said. “I appear to have mislaid them.”
She reached under the counter, picked up the glasses that he had left at lunchtime, and placed them in his hand. Her fingertips lingered against his palm for a fraction too long. She felt her face grow hot.
“Wanna brew?” she asked, clearing her throat and turning away.
“Sounds lovely,” he said. She poured them both a cup of tea, and they sat together around a small table on mismatched chairs.
She took a great deal of pride in keeping The Drovers clean and tidy, which was no easy task when it was an old, draughty building, which could use a new coat of paint and leaked in the corner behind the counter when it rained.
She glanced out the window. The sky was grey and uninviting today, but thankfully it was not raining.
“Busy afternoon?” she said.
“Something like that,” he said, blowing on his tea. “Richard - you know the new vet - came by to see the Shire horses.”
Siegfried owned Skeldale Wildlife Park which included The Drovers. He had rehomed the Shire horses from a stable that had closed down near Leeds.
“Everything alright?” she said, taking a sip of tea.
“I’m pleased to report that they’re all in tip top condition,” he said. “Have you been baking that shortbread I like?”
“Aye,” said Audrey. The man had a nose like a bloodhound for her shortbread. “I’ll bring some home with me in a mo.”
As well as working together, Audrey rented a room in Siegfried’s home, Skeldale House, which was close by but tucked away from visitors.
They finished their tea. Audrey cleared the cups away.
“Don’t forget the fruit,” she said, pointing to the box on the counter. It was full of all the fruit and veg that Audrey hadn’t used or sold. Rather than waste it, Siegfried gave it to the animals.
“Righto,” said Siegfried, scooping up the box. “Oh.”
He was looking at the parcel that had been hidden behind the box. There was no hiding the name on the label.
Edward Hall
She snatched it off the counter. He was looking at her with an uncharacteristic softness that made Audrey either want to flee or to bury herself in his jumper and not let go.
Get a hold of yourself. He’s your boss.
She curled her fingers protectively around the parcel. It wasn’t anything special. Just some gloves, as Edward got cold hands, and some of her shortbread, safely boxed up.
“Whatever he’s done,” she said. “He’s still my boy.”
“You don’t need to explain yourself to me,” he said softly.
He held her gaze for a moment.
“Staff meeting tonight,” he said eventually, clearing his throat.
“Since when do we have staff meetings?” Audrey replied, grateful for the change of subject.
“Since now,” he said. “At home, 7 o'clock.”
He turned to leave.
“I’ll take it to the Post Office tomorrow, if you like,” he said, gesturing towards the parcel. Her breath caught in her throat.
No. He’s my boy. It’s my mess. Don’t worry yourself.
“I’ll do it,” she said, unable to meet his eyes. “I need to go to the cash and carry anyway.”
“Righto,” he said and gave her an odd sort of half smile. “If you need anything, anything at all, you only have to ask.” He turned and left The Drovers. Audrey took a deep breath in and then out again.
He popped his head back round the doorframe.
“Remember 7pm, meeting,” he said.
“Right,” she said as he disappeared once more.
“And to be late is unacceptable!” he called as he retreated down the path.
Right. She checked the time on her phone. Just enough time to finish tidying up before going home for the first staff meeting they’d had in - well - ever.
Audrey left The Drovers a short time later. She had Edward’s parcel and a box of shortbread in one hand, and a black sack of rubbish in the other. The air was colder, and at this time of year the sky had already grown dark. She locked The Drovers behind her and made her way through Skeldale Wildlife Park. They had quite the collection of rescued animals including a snapping turtle (found on a building site in Doncaster), an armadillo (rescued from the exotic pet trade) and a small herd of shorthorn cows (acquired from a rare breeder that could no longer afford to keep them).
She arrived at the bins and threw the black sack in. She then walked up the path to Skeldale House. It was an old house set in a large slightly overgrown garden.
Audrey had once suggested cutting back some of the wilder plants, like the stinging nettles, but Siegfried had insisted they stayed. They were good for the Burnished Brass Moth, apparently.
The lights were on. Someone was home. She let herself in. Couldn’t be Siegfried, he would be closing up the reptile house. And she was fairly certain that the other inhabitants, zookeepers James and Helen Herriot, would still be finishing up their duties too.
The dogs, Jess and Dash, bounded up to her. Jess was Siegfried’s and Dash was hers, but both greeted her enthusiastically.
She set her parcel for Edward and shortbread down safely in the cupboard under the stairs, and then placed her keys on the hook in the hall and hung her coat up. There was a coat on the floor, she picked it up. That coat belonged to -
“Tristan?!” she called.
“In here, Mrs H!”
Audrey entered the living room. Sure enough, Tristan, Siegfried’s brother, was draped across the sofa, half eaten apple in hand and grinning roguishly at her.
“Oh come here,” she said, opening her arms wide. Tristan jumped up and hugged her fiercely. “I didn’t know you were coming home. We haven’t got much in.”
“You know me, Mrs H,” he said with a grin. “I can’t be pinned down to a plan.”
“Does your brother know you’re here?”
Tristan’s smile faded a little. “No - I - I thought it’d be a nice surprise.”
Audrey folded her arms. She’d known Tristan long enough to know when things were off with him. “Are you in trouble?”
“I -” but before he could answer the front door opened and James and Helen walked in, arm in arm.
“ Tristan?! ”
They both rushed to embrace him.
“What are you doing back?” James said.
“Does Siegfried know about this?” Helen whispered to Audrey as James and Tristan settled down on the sofa to catch up.
“Apparently not,” she whispered back. “I’ll put t’kettle on, shall I?” She grabbed the shortbread from the cupboard, and walked down the long hall that led to the kitchen, Dash followed her. She filled up the kettle, put it on and then placed the teabags in the teapot.
Just then, the back door opened letting in a rush of cold air. Siegfried shuffled in through the door, rubbing his hands together.
“What I need is a good whiskey and a warm bath,” he said, taking his coat off and hanging it over the back of a dining chair.
“Staff meeting, remember?” she said.
“Oh, yes,” he said absently. “The bath will have to wait, I suppose.”
“Wanna brew?” she said, as the kettle finished boiling.
“Yes please,” he said, looking around the kitchen hopefully.
“It’s on the table,” she said, rolling her eyes.
“Marvellous!” said Siegfried, pouncing on the shortbread box.
Audrey poured the hot water into the teapot and looked over to him. He was munching a piece of shortbread and looking extremely pleased with himself.
“You’ve got Tristan’s mug out,” he said sharply, pointing at the mug with the small birds and word ‘tits’ on it. His good humoured expression dropped and was replaced with a frown.
Audrey busied herself by getting the milk out the fridge.
“He’s here? He’s supposed to be in London,” he said. “What’s he done now?”
“Give him chance -” she said. “He’s only been back five minutes.”
“ Give him chance? ” Siegfried spluttered back at her. “I’ve given him a hundred chances -”
“It’s nice to see you too, brother.” Tristan was leaning in the doorway, arms folded. Siegfried took a deep breath.
“Welcome home,” Siegfried said, turning the box of shortbread over in his hands. “How long can we expect you for this time?”
“For the time being?” Tristan said.
“ For the time being ?” Siegfried replied. “You got fired again, didn’t you?”
Tristan shrugged and stuck his hands in his pockets. He reminded Audrey irresistibly of Edward. With a tense pang in her chest, she started to pour the tea into the mugs.
“What was the point in all that schooling - all that -” he said waving the box of shortbread in his direction. Audrey shot him The Look and he trailed off. “You’ll have to make yourself useful. I won’t have you sitting around bone idle while the rest of us work our fingers to the bone.”
“As you wish,” he said and disappeared back off into the living room. Siegfried let out a sigh.
“Why is it the ones we love the most, cause us the most pain?” she said, adding milk to the tea. Siegfried looked at her wordlessly. His expression was unreadable. He glanced at his watch.
“Staff meeting, fifteen minutes,” he said coolly. He picked up his mug (plain white with a painted horse on it), popped another biscuit in his mouth, and strode out of the room.
“Charming,” Audrey said to Dash.
Twelve minutes later, Audrey, James, Helen and Tristan were sitting in the living room. Tristan was describing in detail how it definitely wasn’t his fault that he found himself unemployed this time.
Audrey was curled up in her favourite armchair, with Dash’s head on her lap. She yawned. It had been a long day already. She hoped this staff meeting didn’t go on too long.
“Any idea what this meeting’s about, Aud?” Helen asked.
“Your guess is as good as mine,” she replied.
Siegfried marched into the living room. He had changed out of his muddy work clothes and into his mustard coloured jumper. It made Audrey feel pleasantly warm, like sinking into a hot bath on a cold day, to see him wearing it. She had brought it for him two Christmases ago.
“If you could all sit at the table,” he said. “That would be much appreciated.”
Tristan and James exchanged a look. Reluctantly, Audrey shooed Dash away. They sat themselves down around the large dining table, with Siegfried at the head of the table.
“Now,” he began. “Yesterday I received a telephone call from a zoo in Sweden, Orsa Rov - Rovid - Rojd - The Orsa Predator Park …”
Audrey glanced at Helen, who raised her eyebrows at her.
“Here we go,” said Tristan with a grin.
“What needs rescuing now?” said Helen.
“You really are the patron saint of lost causes,” Audrey said fondly.
Siegfried huffed out an annoyed sigh.
“If I am permitted to finish -” he said. They fell silent. “I received a call from The Orsa Predator Park. They have to close down and need to relocate their animals. And they’ve enquired all over Europe and no-one is able to help with these particular animals - and I’ve agreed that we will be able to rehome them.”
“Rehome who?” James said.
“Ursus Maritimus!” Siegfried said proudly. They all looked at him blankly.
Audrey resisted the urge to roll her eyes. He knew full well that no-one else at the table knew any of the latin terms for the animals.
“Ursus -” James said. “That’s bear, isn’t it?”
“Boat bear?” Tristan hazarded a guess.
“Boat bear?!” Siegfried said, looking around exasperatedly. “What’s a boat bear? Ursus Maritimus is Latin for polar bear . We’re rescuing a polar bear. Two in fact.”
A stunned silence settled across the room. Audrey wasn’t sure that she’d heard right. Surely even Siegfried Farnon wasn’t ridiculous enough to be rescuing two polar bears ? Was he?