Chapter Text
There was a family that lived in Quahog, Rhode Island, called the Campbells. They were like any other family in town in many ways, your average middle class WASP family, but in one way they were quite different. They were nudists and never wore clothes. Teenager Jeff was the spitting image of his father.
They were sitting around in their living room talking.
“Mom, Dad, I am going to go out with my girlfriend Meg,” Jeff said as he stood up.
“Meg Griffin?” Dotty said surprised. “I thought you two broke up.”
“Yea, isn’t she dating that boy Anthony?” his father Dave replied.
“Nope we are back together.”
“Well good for you two” Dave said.
“Be safe,” Dotty added.
Jeff headed out the door.
Meanwhile in the Griffith house.
Meg is pacing around the living room nervously.
“Gee Meg, would you stop? I’m trying to watch Family Feud.” Her father Peter said, annoyed.
On the TV you could see Steve Harvey interviewing a contestant.
“Things you can say to your therapist but not your wife” he read off his card.
“Are you charging by the hour?” the lady replied.
Everyone in the audience laughed.
Steve looks at the camera with a distressed look.
“Ehehehehe” Peter laughed.
Suddenly Meg heard the doorbell ring.
“I’ll get it,” she said as she walked quickly toward the door. Peter meanwhile was running faster than he had before trying to beat Meg to the door, but as she passed him, he tripped her and she fell flat on her face, “Haha stupid Meg”.
Peter said as he opened the door.
“Oh look, it's the nudist boy”.
“Hey Mr. Griffin” said Jeff, then he turned his eyes to Meg who was just getting up from the floor. “Hey Meg, are you OK? He said, slightly hesitantly”.
Meg’s eyes were welling up with tears.
“Say Hi To your parents for me” Peter says.
“Ok I will” Jeff says looking back to Peter.
“Come on let’s get out of here” Meg said crying as she got up from the floor “My dad is a big fat jerk.” She said, shooting an angry look at Peter.
“Have fun sweety” said Lois called after her in her nasal voice.
“Oh isn’t that nice Peter? The two of them back together” Lois added.
The Griffins and Dave’s parents had become good friends, they shared an interest in the rock band KISS. At least Peter had.
“I haven’t seen them since the KISS Concert.” Peter said “Remember that time at the when you forgot the words.Lois forgot the words. Remember that Lois? Gee that was embarrassing. ”
“Yes Peter,” Lois replied turning a bit red.
“I still know more about KISS than Dave” he said as his eyes narrowed.
Flashback:
Lois and Peter are at a KISS concert in the front painted in full KISS makeup.
“I want to Rock and Roll all Night” the band sings, then come right up to Lois in the front row and hold the microphone up to her, she started blankly before attempting to finish the lyric by saying and have a wonderful…time”. The band looks shocked.
Back in the present:
As Jeff and Meg walked away from the Griffin house, Jeff put his arm around Meg's shoulder to comfort her.
"Are you okay?" he asked softly.
Meg wiped her eyes and nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine. How do you deal with it? All the hate?” Meg asks
“You get used to it” Jeff replied. “At least I have”.
Just as he was saying this someone drove by and yelled out their car window “put some clothes on you freak” and threw a drink at him as they drove off.
“I ignore it” Jeff continued, still dripping from the liquid in the cup that was thrown at him.
“I still haven’t gotten used to my dad being a big jerk. Sometimes he acts like I don’t exist”.
Meg didn’t mind that Jeff and his family were nudists, it made them outcasts and as an outcast herself, she felt she could relate to them.
They walked in silence for a moment before Jeff spoke again. "You know, my parents really like you. Maybe we could hang out at my place more often?"
Meg's face brightened a little. "That would be nice. Your parents are always so kind to me."
Meg was feeling a little better now.
“Have you always been a nudist?”
She asked.
“All my life. I was born this way” Jeff replied with a smile.
They arrived at Jeff’s house and entered the front door.
Meanwhile, back at the Griffin house, Peter was still fixated on his KISS rivalry with Dave Campbell.
"You know what, Lois? I'm gonna call Dave right now and challenge him to a KISS trivia showdown!"
Lois sighed. "Peter, do you really think that's necessary?"
But Peter was already dialing Dave’s number.
Jeff walked in his door with Meg.
“Mom, dad, you remember Meg?” Jeff said as he arrived.
“Of course we do,” Dave said cheerfully.
“How could we forget?” Dottie said as she came over and hugged both of them.
“Can I stay here for a while?” Meg asked.
“Oh sure” Dave said, “as long as it’s OK with your parents”
“Um, I would rather not tell them,” she said.
“Well maybe we should just the same” Dottie said.
With that she got on the phone to call the Griffins but Dave interrupted, “Peter is already calling me”.
“Hello? Peter. What? There is no way you know more about KISS than I do.”
Dave rolled his eyes and covered the phone with his hand. "It's Peter, challenging me to a KISS trivia showdown."
Dottie sighed. "Oh, not this again."
Jeff and Meg exchanged glances, Meg rolling her eyes.
"Listen, Peter," Dave said into the phone, "I don't have time for this right now. We have company... What? No, I'm not chickening out. Fine, you want a showdown? You're on. Tomorrow night, 8 PM, at the Drunken Clam."
Dave hung up the phone, shaking his head. "That man is insufferable."
"Dad, do you really need to do this?" Jeff asked.
"Son, there are some things in life a man can't back down from. This is one of them," Dave replied solemnly.
Meg groaned. "Oh no, my dad's going to be insufferable if he wins."
"Don't worry," Jeff reassured her. "My dad's a KISS encyclopedia. He's got this."
“Uh Dave you didn’t ask Peter if Meg could stay, did you?”
“Oopsies, I forgot” Dave said.
“Oh, forget it” said Dotty “I’m already texting Lois”. After a few minutes Dotty got the reply, Meg could stay, for a while.
“Ok well get ready for dinner, I’m almost finished” Dotty said “We’re having meatloaf”.
“And I would do anything for Love” Dave started singing.”What?”
This time it was Jeff rolling his eyes as he escorted Meg to the table. He pulled a chair out for her like a gentleman.
“I’ll get the baby,” Dotty said, going upstairs to get the toddler.
Once the toddler was at the table everyone started to eat.
“This is good Meatloaf” Meg said
They continued to eat dinner.
“You are free to spend the night,” Dave added after dinner, preparing the sofa for Meg.
“Thanks, I appreciate that,” she replied.
“Make yourself at home on the sofa” Dave said.
Meg did just that.