Work Text:
“Thanks for coming so quickly.” Din said opening the door, Zuckuss and 4-Lom followed him inside and down the hallway.
“Of course,” Zuckuss answered, “So what's the job? Greef was a bit light on the details”
“We are able to assist with many tasks.” 4-Lom added, “Well, most tasks. Basically any task that doesn't involve Jawas.” He paused, “We hate Jawas.”
“Here, hold this.” Din said shoving a writhing bundle of blankets into Zuckuss’s confused hands.
“I just explained, we hate Jawas.” 4-Lom said with exasperation.
“It's not a Jawa. It's a baby!”, Zuckuss exclaimed, “Don't you know what a baby looks like?”
“In my defense, as a robot I was never a baby.”
“That is so weird.”
“And I find it weird that you were once one fourth your size and prone to crying while filling your diaper with…”
“I'm begging you to abandon that sentence right there.” Zuckuss interjected. Before 4-Lom could respond he turned his attention back to Din. “What do you want us to do with this baby?”, he said holding it at arms length.
“Keep Grogu entertained. I just need some sleep.” Din didn’t look back as he walked toward his bedroom, “he's been up for two days and he's teething.” he continued, “ also, he's force sensitive, but don't worry, you'll be fine.” and with that he closed the door.
Zuckuss pulled the blankets to reveal the babies face. Instantly Grogu's eyes grew wide and his lower lip began to quiver.
“Oh no.” Zuckuss said reassuringly. “It's okay. It's okay, we are friendly, see?” He smiled.
“I think he finds your face disturbing.” 4-Lom offered.
“What?! He's clearly looking at you.”
“Perhaps neither of us have a face suitable to comfort a child.”, Zuckuss sadly nodded in agreement.
Giant tears welled up in Grogu’s eyes, the lip quiver grew more intense.
“No no, please don't cry. I have no idea what to do if you cry.”, Zuckuss said with growing panic. “4-Lom, find him a toy!” He called out.
4-Lom looked around, the dwelling was sparsely decorated, he found two plush toys, one shaped like a human and the other like a human with long fur, he grabbed one in each hand.
“Now what?” He asked, his eyes darting back and forth between the two humanoid shaped toys.
Grogu was starting to cry, Zuckuss looked panicked. “I don't know! Do something!”
4-Lom leaped over and did the first thing that came to his vast robot mind, he did a puppet show.
“Oooooh, I'm Han Solo and I'm a stupid idiot and people only pretend to like me because I'm handsome!” He said shaking one of the puppets while speaking in a high pitched voice.
Grogu stopped crying, his eyes focused on the plush toys.
“My name is Chewbacca and I settle arguments by ripping off limbs!”, he said in a deeper voice shaking the other toy with fur.
The baby giggled.
“Tone it down a bit.” Zuckuss scolded.
“You're correct, sorry.”
“I tricked a princess into loving me even though I dont understand the difference between speed and distance!”, 4-Lom continued “I’m Han Solo, I'm basically a space pet to a giant walking ball of hair.” all while gently shaking the toys to show which was speaking.
Zuckuss thought about this, 4-Lom was right, when you considered the average life span of wookies to humans Han Solo could be viewed as pet. Both he and Grogu laughed.
“I had no idea you could be funny.” Zuckuss said while lifting Grogu gently into the air eliciting more giggles.
“I am capable of many things.” 4-Lom answered, “At the moment I am capable of providing child entertainment and wookie mockery.”
“Look at me, I'm a furry monster and everyone is okay with that for some reason.” 4-Lom said in a deep voice while shaking the long fur toy, Grogu laughed while reaching for the toy.
“I once settled a bar tab by throwing a man through a wall.”
Zuckuss shook his head in faint mockery.
The baby took the long furred toy into his arms, he seemed content for the moment.
“I have an idea.” 4-Lom said. “And you may not like it.”
Zuckuss looked slightly alarmed.
“But the baby will love it.” 4-Lom concluded
—--------------------------
“Mist Hunter to the Millennium Falcon, do you read us?” 4-Lom called into the comm system.
A moment later the familiar voice of Han Solo responded,
“What do you two space bugs want?”
“We require your wookie.” 4-Lom answered with glee.
“Listen here you two idiots, I don't care what kinda bounty he has on his head, I would never hand him over for any amount of credits!”
“No no, you don't understand.” 4-Lom interrupted, “Our baby needs him.”
“Your WHAT?!?”, Solo’s voice screamed over the comm system.
“Captain Solo, please come to our coordinates.” Zuckuss interjected, “I don't think we can explain the situation at this time.” Reluctantly Solo agreed.
As soon as Grogu saw Chewbacca he let out a series of joyful noises while running toward him as fast as his tiny legs would allow.
Over the next three hours Chewbacca played with Grogu and kept him entertained. When Din awoke from his nap he was confused by the added company but he didn't mind, he couldn't remember the last time he saw the baby so happy.
That night as they walked back to their ship Zuckuss noticed that 4-Lom was starring at him.
“What? What is it?” He asked.
“I keep thinking how you were once Grogu’s size and how you must have, at some point been upset.” 4-Lom answered, “Upset enough to produce large tears in your buggy eyes.”
“I suppose I did.” Zuckuss answered giving a small shrug.
“May I do something to satisfy my curiosity?” 4-Lom stopped to face Zuckuss.
“Listen. It's been a long day and I just want to..” before he could finish his thought 4-Lom reached out his hand and gently patted the top of his head.
“There there little Zuckuss.”, he said in a soothing tone, “There there. It will be okay.”
Zuckuss stared at him in silence.
“Did that improve your childhood in a measurable way?”, 4-Lom asked.
Zuckuss thought for a moment. “You know, I think it did.”, he answered. “I can't believe that helped.” his voice filled with genuine awe.
“I guess I really am capable of many things.”, 4-Lom answered.
The End
