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Penelope seeing herself marrying her exes on her ex husbands wedding day with another woman is weird, to say the least. She can recognize that it's absolutely partially fueled by the sleep deprivation, on top of the absolute strangeness of being here in the first place, though she would never miss it when she knows her kids want her there. And she wants to support Victor too. It's also strange that she's seeing her dead father. She's aware of that. She's barely gotten past worrying that she's losing it, to be honest.
But the weirdest thing, by far somehow, is when she's watching the wedding, out of her own head for a moment and hoping there's no more visions of the past or of possible futures that just didn't quite fit, and suddenly she's seeing herself in Nicole again. But standing opposite her this time isn't Victor, or Matteo, or even Max. It's Schneider.
She blinks and tries to clear the vision, because it's too ridiculous to take seriously or do anything other than a double take, but it's still there. "Papi, what is this?" she asks her father sitting next to her even as she knows he's not, really. None of this is real. But just how sleep addled must her brain be, to be seeing herself marrying Schneider of all people?
"I am not the one who's mind conjured this up, lupita."
"I would never marry Schneider," Penelope says, laughing at the absurdity of the idea. "Clearly I need sleep even more than I thought."
"I'm inclined to agree," he laughs. "But I don't think that's all it is. Have you really never even considered it? He's your best friend. You care for him very much. He loves Alex and Elena, and he's very supportive of you. To be honest, mi vida, I do think he's a little strange for you. I would not have guessed this possibility for a moment. But he always shows up for you. You clearly care for each other. Why is it so impossible to consider?"
"Because it's Schneider," she says disbelievingly. "I mean he's great and we're buds, but he's a man child trust fund baby. I've never thought of him like this. It's gross. Like throw up in your mouth gross," she says, fake gagging to make a point.
"Well, lupe, I didn't make this up. This is your mind. Have you really, truly never felt anything romantic? Not when he's holding you through a panic attack or joking with you or even helping to take care of the family when things get too busy? Or even when he's driving you crazy or barging in to talk about some new ridiculous interest?" he asks, eyebrow raised. There's a knowing look in his eyes, and Penelope shakes her head.
"No, that's-" Penelope starts, but she can't help looking away from the vision and over to the real Schneider, sitting across from her but not looking at her. The vision disappears from her view entirely, her Papi along with it.
That's ridiculous, she thinks. There's no way she’d ever be into Schneider. He's Schneider.
But she can't help but think of her father's words. There are very few things more reassuring when she's panicking then Schneider's weird advice and his arm around her, holding her tight, letting her know that he's there for her unconditionally. And yes, he's a stupid man child who says dumbass rich people crap sometimes, but... but he's also the man who took over watching Alex and Elena and cooking for them when she was out looking for Mami (even if his cooking was complete crap.) He's the man who always knows how to bring her mood up even in more lighthearted ways when she's just a little down. The man who knows exactly how to help when she needs it, over text or in person. Who makes her laugh with his ridiculous stories and ideas. Her best friend. Who makes her feel safe and annoyed and cared for and supported and frustrated. He's always there, when she needs him and when she doesn't, and sometimes it can be annoying, but it also means a lot to her. So yeah, he's her best friend and she cares about him, but it's not... It can't be, right?
A memory enters her mind, and she thinks about her talk with Matteo, with Nicole. About how Nicole would feel if anything happened to Victor. About the way Penelope didn't feel about something happening to Matteo. Because as the memory pops in unprompted, as she thinks about how Schneider is always there, she thinks about if he wasn't. About if something happened to him. She doesn't quite mean to think of it, but the thoughts come anyway. She thinks it would destroy her. And Penelope knows that friendships can still be profound, can still mean so much. It could be true either way. But it does make the questions feel more real, because something does feel different somehow. Like an idea she never even considered has been brought up, and it's changing how she looks at things a bit.
It's not just about what Schneider does for her, for her family. It's not just about how he calms her down and keeps her level headed. It's about his presence, as annoying as it can be sometimes. It's about him, his kindness and his humor and his care and everything that makes him him. Losing him would be too much, she can feel it. He's not just her landlord, and she's known that for a while now. It's been true for even longer. But he's not just a friend either, and she's known that too, though she certainly hasn't acknowledged it for as long. He's family.
But now, she's considering what that word means in reference to him. Victor was family, but he was also her husband. The love of her life, for a time, even if not her whole life, even if not forever. And she doesn't know. She doesn't know if that's something Schneider could be, if he could be someone she loves in that way (if he is). She just knows that whatever way it is, he's her family.
As Victor and Nicole say their vows, she sees herself and Schneider again, for the briefest of seconds, and she thinks that maybe someone can be several things at once. He's her family. He's her best friend. And maybe he's something else, too.
Those thoughts are cut off as the music starts. Not long after, she sees Avery walk in. And as Schneider chicken dances over to her with an excited, relieved smile on his face, Penelope feels the last puzzle piece click into place with the complicated feeling in her chest. Maybe she is in love with him. But maybe it doesn't matter. And maybe that's okay, because she knows that even if he is another love that just doesn't quite fit or work out that way (because no matter what she may feel, she knows what he feels for Avery, and that's okay, too. She wants him to be happy.), he'll never stop being family no matter what. She'll always have him. And it's also okay because after everything she's been through, she knows she's going to be okay, whether she "finds someone" or not. She has everything she needs. And Schneider is a part of that, but even if she does feel something romantic for him (and the idea still feels so weird, but it doesn't feel untrue), she's content with what she has, with her amazing kids and with her mom and Dr. B and her friends from therapy, and with Schneider, too, as a part of her family. She loves her life. And she's so proud of everything that she's built and how far she's come.