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Inside Angel’s Share, a harp played faintly. The notes drifted out into the night, stirring memories Eula had tried to bury. The melody twisted the knife in her chest, a reminder of the nights spent wrapped in each other’s presence, tangled in devotion she thought would never unravel.
They had been here last winter, she could still picture Amber’s smile, the way her eyes lit up when she talked about her dreams, each word laced with hope and certainty. But she was gone, forever. Not in the dramatic way romance stories often go. No screaming fights, no shattered plates, no bitter words that couldn’t be taken back. Just a slow fading, like the twilight that gave way to darkness. They stopped speaking about the future and stopped fighting for time together. It felt easier to let go until it wasn’t.
She turned and started walking, her aimless treading echoing in the empty streets. The memories clung to them like shadows, impossible to shake. Every corner held her ghost. The bookstore where she had picked up novels she’d never finish, the park where they’d spent lazy afternoons watching clouds drift by, and now the café, still warm with life but empty of her presence. The truth was cruel: Eula couldn’t salvage what was gone. And yet, the grip of her never loosened. Amber was there in every song she heard, in every place she visited. Her scent lingered in the folds of a scarf tucked away in the back of a closet, a scent Eula couldn’t bring herself to wash out.
It wasn’t fair, she thought, as her hands curled into fists in her coat pockets. It wasn’t fair to be haunted by the affection that felt like home and yet left no door to return to. She had tried to move on, desperate attempts at dates that felt hollow, nights spent trying to convince herself she was better off alone. Hands on her face, all Eula wanted to see was Amber’s features on the body that was lying beside her. But in the quiet moments, when the world was still, she was always there. A phantom. A wound that she kept picking on that she would never let heal.
The rain began to pour harder as she paused at the bridge where they first embraced. Eula’s heart ached in the way only old love could make it ache, not sharp, but heavy, like carrying a weight that never got any lighter. She closed her eyes and let the rain mix with the tears she didn’t want to admit had come. She knew it was all her fault, she knew she was selfish. How could she ever bear to think of other lips touching the nape of her neck? How could her golden eyes look at another with such tenderness?
“Fuck.” – Eula gritted through her teeth under her breath. How could she ever survive the melody of her beloved’s laugh gracing someone else’s ears? She felt nauseous, she could swear the faint notes of her perfume were woven into her skin
Somewhere deep down, Eula knew she would never truly let her go. Maybe that was the curse of a love so deep it became a part of you. Trying to forget those moments felt like scraping melted plastic off a frying pan. No matter how far she walked, Amber would always be in her shadow, just out of reach, her fiery footsteps echoing in the corners of Eula’s mind.
Forever was just a word they’d used too easily back then. Forever wasn’t a promise they’d failed to keep. It was a truth they’d never escape.