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After Johnny and Dallas died it was silently agreed among the gang that the Curtis bros were on suicide watch. Mostly Ponyboy but still. I led Soda inside the house and into his bedroom. Two-Bit led Ponyboy to the couch and Steve followed after Darry who seemed to be moving without thought.
Soda undraped himself from me and crawled into bed.
He looked over at me with watery eyes. Arms stretched towards me. It was like he was six instead of sixteen. He grabbed me and pulled me to his chest as though I was a teddy bear and not a whole ass human.
I let myself be pulled to his side. He finally let the damn break again as he sobbed into shoulder. I felt tears well up in my own eyes as we both cried until we fell asleep in each other's arms.
I woke up in the middle of the night to check on things outside the room. Ponyboy was asleep pinned underneath Two-Bit. Whether voluntary or because Pony tried to run is up for debate. Superman was in his room. Steve right beside him. Both awake and staring at the ceiling but not far off.
Going back to Soda he was now sitting up and holding a pillow to his chest as he whimpered and sniffled. ‘Poor Pepsi’
He all but lunged at me as he realized I was back, flinging the pillow aside. He pulled me to his chest.
“You left.”
“I was checking on everyone. Everyone but us Darry and Steve are asleep. I was barely gone five minutes.”
“Still.”
Suddenly being this close to him felt different. I reached up to swipe away at the tears rolling down his cheeks.
“We gonna go back to sleep,or are you gonna hold me hostage for a bit.”
He leaned in and our lips brushed.
“Steve is awake, he could walk in…” I whispered against his lips. He didn't say anything, just released my hands to cup my face with one hand and my waist with the other.
“He knows how I feel about you. Hell the whole gang knows! I'll let you go if you want me to though.” He drops his hands.
“But you're right. It's been a day and we should sleep or try.”
“Not gonna be able to sleep. I'll close my eyes and see them.”
“How do you feel about that? You haven't shed one tear today. You don't have to be so tough. Especially now. You lost two people just like we have.”
“Yes I do.” I turned my back to him. He wrapped his arms around my waist.
“You're safe here. Anyone gives you shit about crying we'll…I'll beat them up for you.”
“You don't mean that…”
“Ace. Look at Me.”
“It's ok to be delicate right now.”
My eyes watered and overflowed like a broken dam. I couldn't see but I could feel him pulling closer. My head on his shoulder as I finally let it all out. Hands rubbing my back as I sobbed.
Don't know how long I cried but pulling back from his shoulder his shoulder was soaked.
“Better?”
“Kiss Me.”
He didn't need to be told twice. As he surged forward and captured my lips with his. I hoped Steve wouldn't come barging in.
I enjoyed the sweet taste of Soda and the bitter taste of cigarettes that lingered.
We kissed for a while before a knock at the door made us break apart.
“Pretend you're asleep. Come in!”
I laid down and shut my eyes.
“Hey. Is Ace in he-” Steve walked and stopped himself.
“Shhh she's asleep.”
“Ok. I can take her home.”
“You gon’ carry her the whole way? Call your mom to let her know she's safe with you here. Go home in the morning.”
“We have to go.”
“If you insist.” He scooped me up in his arms to hand me over to Steve. But I gripped onto Soda tightly.
“Ace. Steve's gonna take you home.”
Steve tried to take me out of his arms but I had a vice grip on Soda.
“No.” I nuzzled into Soda. My eyes open.
“We have to go home Ace.”
“You go. I wanna stay.”
“But-” “Go.”
“Alright. No funny business Sodapop.”
“I would never! I'm a gentleman. I'd take her out first!”
We both looked at him. I tried not to smile at the idea.
“Yeah Ace, we're going home.”
I may have scurried underneath the bed until he left.