Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Sun Dec 15, 8:39 pm

Unknown number- hey ray, its willa. charlotte gave me your new number

N- I’m sorry who’s this?

Unknown number- dude, dont tell me you forgot our code

N- What code? I think you have the wrong number. 

Unknown number- ray you better not be pranking me right now

Unknown number- i got into it with the devil this morning and i already ranted about it to the others. its your turn now

N- Again, I think you have the wrong number.

Unknown number- damn it, now i know youre not ray

Unknown number- hes such a whore for drama, as soon as i told him about the devil he would have dropped the prank

Unknown number- anyway, sorry for bothering you. feel free to block me or whatever 

N- No it’s fine! Wrong numbers happen all the time.

N- And I would be more than happy to listen if you want. 

Unknown number- you sure, cause it’s a lot

N- Of course! Rants are always better when you do it in front of a non biased audience.

Unknown number- oh okay, cool

Unknown number- let me give you some context before i start 

Unknown number- im a musician and im well known enough to have fans 

Unknown number- a few months out of boredom, i did a q&a

Unknown number- and a fan asked me about what i thought of this one actor 

Unknown number- and theyre a romcom actor and i dont like romcoms

Unknown number- so i told the truth and said i dont watch their stuff so i dont have an opinion on them

Unknown number- they responded and then we started arguing online. our fan bases are now at war

Unknown number- and yeah the rest is history. we keep saying stuff that pisses the other person off

N- Oh my gosh, that sounds awful.

N- I’m kinda going through the same thing right now, except the person I’m arguing with online was someone I admired. 

N- Any way, what happened today?

Unknown number- ayyy, pissing off other people buddies!

Unknown number- today we argued about talent

Unknown number- they felt the need to tweet that i am a one trick pony when it comes to my music

Unknown number- this is because i like to write and perform what feels comfortable

Unknown number- in my case, that means nightcore covers and songs about my emotional state 

Unknown number- i can do other stuff but my job started out as a hobby and no one will ever tell me change what i want to do

N- That’s amazing! I can’t carry a tune to save my life.

N- And you should be able to do what you want to do. 

Unknown number- thats…really nice of you to say

N- What did you say back to them?

Unknown number- i said they were a one note actor(because all they ever do is act in fucking romcoms)

Unknown number- then that led to a debate between the two of us about whether or not either of us could do the others genre(me writing a love song, him doing an emotional scene that had nothing to do with romance)

N- I’m sure you could do it!

N- The actor sounds mean. I hope you’re doing okay!

Unknown number- thanks, but im doing fine

Unknown number- its whatever tho

Unknown number- hbu, have you gotten into arguments with the person you fight with?

Unknown number- or you could just tell me how you started arguing with them

N- Oh, you don’t want to hear about that. 

Unknown number- hey, you listened to me, its only fair i listen to you

N- It’s stupid, really.

Unknown number- just tell me

N- Where do I start?

N- Well it all began in July. 

N- I’m a performer and I have been since I was young. It’s been hard but I do love my job. 

N- Like I said, this person used to be someone I admired so I was well versed in their career. 

N- They’ve always been able to tell it like it is which I really admire and what they put out into the world…It helped me in ways they don’t even know.

N- One day my name got brought up on one of their tweets, I don’t even know how it happened but they basically said they didn’t like my work. 

N- And that really hurt so I responded without thinking. 

N- Looking back, I probably shouldn’t have but I couldn’t help it, I wasn’t thinking. 

N- And that set them off I guess. We’ve been fighting ever since. 

Unknown number- im sorry, that sucks

Unknown number- did you guys fight today too

N- Yeah, but it was my fault. I don’t want to talk about it. 

Unknown number- thats fine, you dont have to

Unknown number- next time something like that happens, you can to me if you want 

Unknown number- or not, dont feel like you have to 

Unknown number- idk what you want to do

Unknown number- bite me

N- No, no, no! It’s fine! I would love to keep talking to you. 

N- I just have to change your number in my phone to Willa!

Unknown number- my name isnt willa

Unknown number- its my middle name

N- Oh okay.

N- You don’t have to tell me your real name if you don’t want to. 

Unknown number- ok

Unknown number- thanks

N- No problem!

Unknown number- whats your middle name so that i can put your name into my phone

N- I have two, Maddox and Caden. 

Unknown number- i like caden better

Unknown number- caden it is

Unknown number- shit, i gotta go. ive got to record soon 

N- Dang it. 

N- Well I’ll talk to you later then I guess. 

N- Bye Willa! Thank you for listening!

Unknown number- no problem. bye caden, thanks for listening to me too

You hearted this message 

New contact created 

Contact named Willa🎶🎸(the cool musician)

Chapter Text

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

being stuck in traffic sucks. but at least i can write while i wait

7/18/24 5:07 pm 

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

okay, turns out that the reason why i havent been able to write is not because i dont have time. instead it is because i have writers block lol. traffic still sucks ass btw

7/18/24 5:57 pm

Thad @ football4lyfe

psst @bw/ag you should do a q&a

7/18/24 6:01 pm

        bat is queen @ #1batfan

bat pls, i will die happy if you do

7/18/24 6:02 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

apparently my number 1 fan and my best friend want me to do a q&a drop your questions below and ill do my best to answer the ones i find interesting 

7/18/24 6:10 pm

1000+💬

        bat is queen @ #1batfan

okay so i feel like should know this being your number 1 fan and all but why is your stage name bat with a gun?

7/18/24 6:14 pm

        bat is batgirl @ batstophittingclosetohome

 Favorite tv show?

7/18/24 6:14 pm

         I SAW BAT LIVE @ batknowsbest

who designed your concert mask? i noticed that it looks different than your other masks

7/18/24 6:17 pm

         music nerd @ musicnerd 

how does it feel to write some of the most gut wrenching music on the planet?

7/18/24 6:18 pm

         NOAH RETWEETED MY BW/AG POST @ noahbatisreal

what do you think of noah elliot?

7/18/24 6:19 pm

Read More

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@#1batfan my name comes from my favorite animal(bats) and my real name

7/18/24 6:30 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@batstophittingclosetohome hmm it fluctuates rn i would say danny phantom thanks to me and @football4lyfe rewatching it. and no, i will not stop hitting close to home, thats my job. bite me/j

7/18/24 6:31 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@batknowsbest good eye! most people haven’t been able to tell that i have more than one mask depending on the situation. as for your question, @interestsbylizzy is the one who designed(and made) my concert mask, she actually is the person behind my wardrobe

7/18/24 6:34 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@musicnerd it feels great ngl. lol in all honesty, its hard to write these songs and it feels like im sharing too much of myself to the world. at the same time though when a new song is put out, i just hope that someone out there find comfort in it 

7/18/24 6:36 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@noahbatisreal uhhhh i dont watch romcoms, cause i dont like them(and from what i can tell that’s all he stars in). so i dont really think about him

7/18/24 6:37 pm

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot

I don’t just star in romcoms. 

7/18/24 8:37 pm

Tue Dec 17, 2:39 pm

Caden- Willa, what’s your favorite color?

Uzi- purple, why?

Caden- I want to get to know you better!

Caden- So I’m asking you questions. 

Uzi- oh

Uzi- whats your favorite color then

Caden- Yellow. 

Caden- We should do a game where we go back and forth and ask questions for each other. 

Uzi- sounds good, ill go first

Uzi- favorite animal

Caden- Dogs, specifically golden retrievers. Favorite food?

Uzi- hard one but ill go with the pastrami sandwich from my favorite deli

Uzi- hobbies, do you have any

Caden- Yes I do! I like to draw even though I’m not very good at it and I like looking up dog facts. 

Caden- Going to copy your question, but what are your hobbies?

Uzi- copycat

Uzi- i like to draw too, i like reading, and playing video games

Uzi- my job used to be my main hobby tho(making music)

Uzi- favorite show

Caden- Avatar: The Last Airbender. 

Caden- Favorite musician and/or band?

Uzi- oh you just fucked up

Caden- What? Why?

Uzi- you just asked the child of two GIGANTIC music nerds to choose her favorite music related person

Uzi- someone who was raised in a household where no music is bad

Uzi- youre gonna have to elaborate what you mean by that

Caden- Hmmm.

Caden- So favorite music related person per genre?

Uzi- thats still a lot dude

Uzi- just pick five, hell i wont even complain about the choices

Uzi- you just cant make fun of me for it

Caden- Deal.

Caden- And your genres are; pop, indie, cover, rock, electronic.

Uzi- pop, olivia rodrigo

Uzi- indie, its a tie between sarah barrios and mxtoon

Uzi- idk if cover is a genre, but if it is, it has a tie between lydia the bard and annapantsu

Uzi- rock, i think i would have to go for the hunna

Uzi- electronic, i dont really listen to that genre but if given the choice it would be the people who made liquor and cigarettes

Caden- Wow…That’s a lot.

Uzi- i warned you

A Bat, A Barbie, A Doll, A Football, and A Cowboy 

Tue Dec 17 3:07 pm

Knock off Barbie- damn z, whats on ur phone thats got u smiling like that

Knock off Barbie- or r u flirting w/some1

Uzi- shut it

Doll stop changing your contact name- uzi’s doing what now?

Football- uzi’s got a crush?

Uzi- i do not

Uzi- your sister is jumping to conclusions 

Cowboy- can confirm, zi is grinning like an idiot right now 

Uzi- if you dont shut up 

Knock off Barbie- getting defensive there i c

Knock off Barbie- u sure its not a crush

Uzi- its not, i dont know them like that

Doll stop changing your contact name- so you’re texting a stranger. 

Football- uzi! have you learned nothing!?

Uzi- stop quoting dance moms

Football- no, the shit they say is fucking hilarious 

Knock off Barbie- EMPTY CHAIR, DO A SOLO

Doll stop changing your contact name- Jill's throwing shoes, and she's cursing, and all I'm thinking is 'you are so hard to take seriously wearing that hat!'

Football- i think about that quote way more than i should

Uzi- ugh

Uzi- if you cant beat em, join em

Uzi- BUS DRIVERRR! EASY ON THE ROAD! WE’RE DOING EYE MAKEUP BACK HEREEE

Uzi- that was oddly therapeutic 

Uzi- we need to quote dance moms more

Cowboy- let’s circle back to the fact that uzi is texting a stranger

Uzi- theyre not a stranger, were getting to know each other rn

Knock off Barbie- oh ur getting 2 know them

Doll stop changing your contact name- sounds serious. 

Cowboy- don’t encourage this! she’s texting a stranger 

Football- yeah, beau’s right. uzi, don’t text strangers 

Uzi- let’s put it this way

Uzi- when i text caden, im not getting into arguments online with noah elliot

Knock off Barbie- she makes a good point 

Knock off Barbie- and caden huh? thats a interesting name

Doll stop changing your contact name- hold on, you’ve exchanged names with this person?

Football- uzi, what the fuck

Cowboy- aunt nori and uncle khan taught you better than that

Uzi- jfc, no we did exchange names

Uzi- we exchanged middle names

Uzi- and it was my fault anyway for putting in thads new phone number wrong

Uzi- and we’re just sharing stupid facts about each other, nothing serious 

Cowboy- you promise 

Uzi- yes i promise, calm down 

Football- if anything gets weird, tell us

Football- and lizzy stop encouraging her to talk to strangers on the internet 

Knock off Barbie- u act like i didnt already know all of this 

Knock off Barbie- which i did except 4 his name 

Football- why was lizzy the first to know?

Uzi- i thought she put your number in wrong 

Uzi- she didnt i just mistyped it 

Uzi- and you know how lizzy can make you spill your guts out without you realizing 

Football- damn

Cowboy- of course she did

Doll stop changing your contact name- be safe, okay uzi.

Uzi- i will

Chapter Text

A Bat, A Barbie, A Doll, A Football, and A Cowboy 

Thurs July 18th, 8:53 pm

Uzi- wtf is going on

Uzi- my twitter notifs are blowing up

Uzi- i just got home, wth did i do

Knock off Barbie- u pissed off the stans babes

Doll stop changing your contact name- and big time it seems.

Cowboy- it’s not all bad

Football- he’s right, your stans are sticking up for you

Uzi- this doesnt answer any of my questions

Uzi- wtf is going on

Knock off Barbie- IM THE DEAD GIRL IN THE POOL

Doll stop changing your contact name- WTF IS GOING ON

Football- ah yes, girl in red

Cowboy- i love how you two can turn anything a girl in red moment

Uzi- no but seriously, what is happening

Uzi- i didnt do anything, i have no clue whats setting anyone off

Cowboy- it’s fine, nothing to worry about

Cowboy- why don’t you take a social media break 

Uzi- uh fuck that

Uzi- im checking whether you like it or not 

Knock off Barbie- well its abt 2 get worse

Football- all we can do is brace for impact

Doll stop changing your contact name- i forget how forgetful you can be. you don’t tell uzi not to do something. she will do it out of spite. 

Cowboy- it’ll be fine

Cowboy- hopefully

Siblings, siblings, siblings

Thurs July 18, 9:23 pm

Twin- ghefwiuefiewg

Twin- n, omfg

Twin- twitter is a shit show

Twin- like an actual shit show

Tess The Best- Language V. It wasn’t a smart idea, you should have talked to us before tweeting that!

Jayjay- I don’t blame him.

N- They said I only act in romcoms!

N- And that I was a bad actor.

N- I don’t only act in romcoms.

N- And I’m not a bad actor. 

Little Sister Cyn- big brother and bat are both in the wrong

Little Sister Cyn- big brother shouldn’t have let his crush on bat cloud his judgement and took their response a tad too personally

Little Sister Cyn- on the other hand, bat could have worded their original answer better

Tess The Best- Still, he shouldn’t have responded at all

Jayjay- He was defending himself Tessa. 

Twin- if i may stir the pot

N- Please don’t. 

Twin- no one said you were a bad actor. bat only said that from what they could tell, you only act in romcoms which they don’t like

Twin- thats fine, everyone has their own opinions on things

Twin- and normally you like it when bat says how they truly feel about a person. its only different now because its directed towards you

Twin- like cyn said, youre only letting this get to you because you have a crush on them

Tess The Best- Now that I think about it, Bat never even said anything bad people who DO like romcoms

Jayjay- Does it matter what they said?

Jayjay- They still answered the question even though they could have ignored it.

Little Sister Cyn- i still think both big brother and bat are wrong

Tess The Best- Regardless of who is right or wrong, we have a PR nightmare on our hands right now

Twin- tess, we have no pr manager. if anything, youre our pr manager

Tess The Best- I know, I’m just trying to stress how serious this is

Tess The Best- N, you need to lay low. No posting on your socials for a bit

Little Sister Cyn- too late

Jayjay- What do you mean too late?

Twin- during this time, bat has responded

Twin- n has responded right back to them

Tess The Best- Gosh freaking darn it

Bat With A Gun @bw/ag

@therealnoahelliot look dude, i havnt seen or heard of you doing anything other than romcoms. is that a bad thing, no, get your paycheck however the hell you want to. i just wont be watching your movies because i dont like the genre you work in. and i never said you were a bad actor

7/18/24 9:34 pm

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot

@bw/ag You implied it. 

7/18/24 9:37 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

i didnt imply shit.

7/18/24 9:40 pm

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

You did!

7/18/24 9:41 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

whatever nepo baby.

7/18/24 9:43 pm

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

According to rumors, that’s like the pot calling the kettle black. 

7/18/24 9:45 pm

king noah @ noahelliotmybeloved 

who does bat with a gun think they are? do they even know who they’re talking about 

7/18/24 9:48 pm

LYNN MET NOAH @ noahswife 

not bat acting like they didn’t get as big as they did without noah. i only know who they are because of his retweets

7/18/24 9:53 pm

bat or noah who do i choose @ ohmyheart

as a fan of both noah and bat, i’m so conflicted! like bat was kinda mean but that’s just how they are. and yeah noah responded but i would have too! uggghhh 

7/18/24 10:01

viv pls step on me @ godiluvtheelliots

Lol, Bat With A Gun thinks they’re all that. They ain’t shit, they haven’t put anything good out since they co-wrote Survive The Darkest Things with Alexis Vega. And if the rumors are true, they only got that gig cause of their daddy

7/18/24 10:09 pm

Noah’s girl @ noahsgirl 

Yeah Noah’s nepo baby, we all know this. We don’t deny it. Bat stans are the ones who sob pathetically because their fav is talentless and had to have their dad pay off their career(look it up, there is evidence to back this)

7/18/25 10:10 pm

bat is queen @ #1batfan

why are all the noah elliot stans acting like their fave isn’t a fucking nepo baby? all of them are coming for bat like “oh their dad paid for their fame” or “noah retweeted their stuff, that’s why they're relevant” when like…no? bat’s relevant because they’re bat

7/18/24 10:12 pm

ur fav is a nepo baby @ batisright

bat’s independent, they always have been. yes, they have stated that their dad was in the industry which was why they chose to be independent(allegedly it's also why they chose to be masked). they wanted to make their own name through their talent, not their dad. and it paid off. survive the darkest things came out TWO YEARS after bat started making music. meanwhile, noah elliot has piggybacked off of his family name his entire fucking career. it's the only reason why he’s still relevant 

7/18/24 10:15 pm

bat is the kid of boy band member @ imtalkingnow

look, i of all people should be agreeing with the nepo baby stance on bat. but here’s the thing, it doesn’t matter if bat’s dad was possibly a former boy band member. bat had the means to use their dad’s theoretical history to get big but they didn’t. instead, they built their career off their back. nepo baby my ass

7/18/24 10:17 pm

music nerd @ musicnerd

even if bat is a nepo baby, their music speaks for itself. and anyway, they clearly got their talent from their dad teaching them

7/18/24 10:20 pm

NOAH RETWEETED MY BW/AG POST @ noahbatisreal

oh god i fucked up

7/18/24 10:22 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

fuck the drama, im going back to the q&a. @thecoldpoint, my dream collab would an animated music video with the animation done by gooseworx

7/18/24 10:27 pm

Tue Dec 17 5:50 pm

Willa- i forgot to ask

Willa- whos your favorite musical artist

N- That’s a loaded question.

Willa- loaded like you have too many favorites

Willa- or loaded like its hard to explain

N- Hard to explain.

Willa- try me

N- Okay.

N- So you know that person I got into that argument online with?

Willa- the one you admired, yeah?

N- Well, they were my favorite singer. Like ever.

N- Their music…I don’t know how to explain it but it’s always been there for me when I needed it most.

N- I was there from the beginning, back when they were only posting covers.

N- It really hurt when the whole thing went down in July.

Willa- oh no

Willa- i guess theyre not your favorite anymore?

N- That’s the thing, I still love their music.

N- Like I’ve tried to stop listening to it but I just can’t.

Willa- maybe it was never the artist you liked

Willa- it was just the music

N- I guess.

N- Do you have that with music you like?

Willa- mhm, i try not to buy into celebrity worship tho

Willa- oh and disney music

Willa- its iconic, yes. but also disney is also capitalism run amok

N- Huh, I never really thought about it like that.

N- Thanks Willa!

Willa- no problem caden

Willa- outside of them, who else do you like to listen to

N- I listen to musicals, my little sister is super into them. I like most of them.

N- I like Waterparks and Ke$ha.

N- And a bunch of singers whose names I don’t remember but my twin calls the style “Bubble Gum Pop”.

Willa- interesting choices

N- Do you not like them?

Willa- nah, i actually kinda like ke$ha

Willa- one of my best friends loves her stuff so ive always known who she was

Willa- i dont really know waterparks, ill have to listen to them when i get the chance

N- You don’t have to.

Willa- i want to

Siblings, siblings, siblings

Tue Dec 17 7:38 pm

Twin- n why are you listening to sarah barrios

N- A friend recommended her.

Jayjay- What friend?

Tess The Best- N made a new friend!

Tess The Best- When did he do that

Little Sister Cyn- someone named willa texted him by accident

Little Sister Cyn- *giggle*

Tess The Best- That’s his new friend?

Twin- ooo is she pretty?

N- I don’t know what they look like.

N- And I don’t know if they’re a girl.

N- Also Cyn, how did you know about Willa?

Little Sister Cyn- *shrugs* you need to stop leaving your phone out and having interesting conversations

N- Cyn!

Jayjay- Stop stealing his phone!

Twin- no cyn, keep stealing his phone

Twin- next time you do, bring it to me and we can gossip about it

Little Sister Cyn- will do

Tess The Best- Wait, does this person know you’re Noah Elliot?

N- No, they don’t. They know my middle name.

Jayjay- Why do they know your middle name?

N- Because they gave me theirs by accident! It was to even out the score.

N- And so that they wouldn’t feel obligated to give me their real name.

Jayjay- Oh my god, he’s talking to strangers online.

Jayjay- Tess, where did we go wrong?

Tess The Best- N, are you sure this is a good idea

N- I’ve been talking to Willa for a few days now, nothing weird has happened.

N- They’re kinda in the same situation as me right now.

Twin- how so

N- They too are a famous person caught up in drama with another famous person.

Tess The Best- Oh dear lord

Little Sister Cyn- as the only one here whose read their texts and isn’t big brother

Little Sister Cyn- i can confirm that willa does seem cool

Jayjay- Still, N shouldn’t be talking to people who are strangers.

N- Uh, “N” is right here.

Twin- n is also 24, a grown ass adult

Tess The Best- Language

Twin- he can do what he wants, jfc tessa

Twin- if he wants to keep having conversations with willa, then let him

Little Sister Cyn- she has a point

Jayjay- I still don’t like it.

Twin- read my previous statement

Jayjay- I can still be worried.

Tess The Best- Everyone just stop

Tess The Best- N you can keep texting the stranger, but if anything weird happens you come straight to me

Tess The Best- Got it?

N- Got it.

Chapter Text

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

in light of recent events, ive been feeling nostalgic and decided to a throwback to when i did covers. so i recorded a cover of sarah barrios bitter bitches. please enjoy 

7/20/24 7:51 pm

          Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

And I’m the petty one?

7/20/24 7:53 pm 

          Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

petty is my brand, this isnt new

7/20/24 7:56 pm

           Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

Petty may be your brand but it sure isn’t mine. 

7/20/24 7:58 pm

           Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

nah youre a bitter asshole 

7/20/24 8:01 pm

            Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

i thought i was a b****h.

7/20/24 8:03 pm

             Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

sir, you are 24 years old. you can swear

7/20/24 8:06 pm

noah or bat who do i chose @ ohmyheart

is it just me or do bat and noah seem kinda flirty lately 

7/20/24 8:12 pm

             bat/noah i <3 u but wth @ iluvnoah&bat

bat’s infamous for doing covers when they feel deeply about something or someone and you can tell how they feel through their voice. i have bitter bitches playing on repeat and i hear them have kind of a flirty tone throughout the song.

7/20/24 8:15 pm

              noah or bat who i chose @ ohmyheart 

@iluvbat&noah holy shit you're right. is this bat’s weird way of a love confession?

7/20/24 8:17 pm

              bat/noah i <3 u but wth @ iluvnoah&bat

@ohmyheart and that’s not even getting into the obvious crush noah has on bat

7/20/24 8:18 pm

I DIDNT MEAN TO START THE DRAMA @ noahbatisreal

i always thought that the first time noahbat would truly interact would be magical. i thought it would be friends to lovers. i didn’t think i would have anything to do with it. none of these things turned out to be true. and yet all this chaos has just made me ship them more

7/20/24 8:19 pm

wingbats @ batwings 

enemies to lovers noahbat when? i need the 100k slow burn fic on my desk by tomorrow morning 

7/20/24 8:21 pm

noah<3 @ noah<3

Ayo, who was gonna tell me that noahbat has been an established ship for the past two years? Someone get me a timeline

7/20/24 8:22 pm

                wingbats @ batwings

i found this timeline on tumblr a few days ago, it’s from three years ago but op’s been posting updates about noahbat on their blog since this started. from what i can tell it’s the post that truly started the noahbat shipping. my friend, who has been in the sauce since this timeline came out, says up until that point noah possibly having a crush on bat was not discussed

7/20/24 8:27 pm

Howisthismylife

No one in the Noah Elliot fandom seems to want to talk about Noah’s possible crush on Bat With A Gun, so I will.

Before we begin, allow me to give a bit of context as to why I am the best person to explain this. I have been a fan of Noah since his first movie, playing Connor Bailey in The Land Of Stories movie adaptation. I became a fan of Bat during the cover years(shout out their nightcore covers of Beetlejuice the musical and Heathers, as a young theatre kid they changed my brain chemistry). Trust me when I say, I know what I’m talking about. 

Our story begins three years ago, back when Bat was mostly known for shit posting(for all you people who became bat fans because of the Ke$ha meme, this was like two months before they did that) and covers, Bat released their first original song, Numb, on September 3rd 2018. They posted about it as soon as it was released. The posts, while they had a sad undertone, showed excitement for the future. Noah retweeted every post and allegedly added commentary about how good the song was. At the time Noah was in a weird limbo as a former child star and people were trying to decide whether or not he was a good enough actor so his social media posts were very carefully crafted. To see him retweet about this small artist was a shock to most of the fandom, leading to rumors of his account being hacked. 

On September 23rd 2018, Bat released their first EP, Water Is Easier To Swim In(it was named after a saying of their mother’s). Noah reacted strongly to this, retweeting any and all things Bat related within the hour. From their shit posts to their announcements, if you were following Noah, you would not be able to escape Bat. Two hours in, he stopped suddenly. In my opinion, I think he had a private stan account for Bat and he just didn’t realize he was retweeting from the wrong account. A lot of Noah fans found Bat because of those retweets but by that point Bat had a dedicated fan base from their cover days and shit posting so the new fans from Noah did not make much of a difference. 

For the next few months, Bat would sporadically post new song titles and snippets of audio that would blow up almost immediately. Noah would retweet the song announcements after the posts would blow up. Some people found this odd as he was never afraid to show that he was a Bat fan back when they weren’t as big(despite popular belief, Numb was NOT what brought Bat fully into the spotlight. That would be No Pain, No Gain the first song released off the EP). There are many theories as to why this is, my personal theory is that Noah was instructed to wait to see if Bat’s stuff would be acceptable to retweet. 

On May 19th 2019, Bat released their first album, Bare Bones. This would coincide with Noah’s first movie that he had a major role in after TLOS, Lost In The Memory which was released a few days before. That night, Noah tweeted out “Rising Fame is hitting hard. Do they even know how relatable this is? Do they know how much they affect me?” The tweet would go mostly ignored, as he quickly buried it under a pile of retweets and promotional material for LITM. It’s also important to note that Rising Fame was about getting wildly popular out of what feels like nowhere.

At this point, you might be thinking, “It just seems like Noah really admires Bat, why are you saying he has a crush on them?” I’m getting there, hold on.

During COVID, Noah showed screenshots of his playlists to the general public. Almost all of them contained songs from Bat from as far back as their cover days to their most recent song. There were rumors of an alleged playlist for his crush, titled ‘they’re so cool’, that only contained Bat songs. Odd considering Bat has voiced their distaste for love songs and very few of their songs can be classified as love songs. The rumors are said to have been started by Viv Elliot, Noah’s twin, but I have yet to see visual proof of this.

On June 4th 2020, people started harassing Bat for a face reveal. Bat has stated on previous occasions that the mask is their protection and allows them to have a normal life. However, while harassment campaigns to get Bat to do a reveal were not uncommon, this one was one of  if not THE worst. Especially after they responded by saying they didn’t owe their fans a face reveal. People went nuts, it was the most toxic time to be in the BW/AG Fandom. A few days later, Noah did an interview and there was a question about his privacy in relation to his fans. Noah said that while he loved his fans, he wished that people would respect boundaries more, citing what was happening to Bat as a good example. He even went as far as to say Bat deserved way better than that.

That was the last major Noah and Bat event for a bit but he did continue to retweet their stuff. 

Then on October 19th 2020, Bat’s 20th birthday, Survive The Darkest Things was released. This was an album they co wrote with 20 time Grammy winner and living legend, Alexis Vega. Only mere hours after it was released, a video was posted by Viv of Noah seemingly blubbering about Bat. The first part of the audio is kind of shit, but you can clearly hear Noah talking about how proud he is of Bat and that they deserve every big thing coming to them. He also references first finding their music at 16. 

Due to Alexis Vega’s poppy tone, people were quick to say that Bat was selling out/turning their back on indie music. It didn’t help that on November 1st 2020 it was announced that Bat wrote and recorded a song for the upcoming adaptation of Nori Doorman’s novel Murder Drones, called Eternal Dreams. Noah went on a now deleted twitter rant(which we have a couple screenshots of, despite how quickly it was deleted) about the criticism Bat was receiving, pointing out how they still didn’t have a label and Bat themself said Eternal Dreams was written as favor to someone. 

The last major event involving Noah possibly liking Bat happened a few days ago. On February 10th 2021, Noah said in an interview that he had a celebrity crush but he didn’t want to say who they were. He admitted that they were a musician and they had a bit of a fandom overlap. While there are theories on who else this could be, given the information that we have it’s pretty obvious that he’s talking about Bat. 

TL:DR- Noah Elliot either admires Bat With A Gun or has a crush on them. 

Update 7/17/24- Bat and Noah have seemingly gotten into an argument online. To me they both seem kinda flirty, but that’s just me! Bat might like Noah too, I think. I have more posts discussing this, just check out the noahbat tag on my blog

#noah elliot #bat with a gun #ba/ag #noahbat

Updated July 20th 2024. Posted February 21st 2021

Chapter Text

Wednesday Dec 18 2:35 pm

Caden- What’s your favorite tv show?

Uzi- right now its grojband 

Uzi- ive been rewatching it cause of a project im working on

Caden- What’s the project?

Uzi- im covering all of the grojband songs

Caden- Oh that’s so cool!

Caden- That’s also like 52 songs, is it for something huge?

Uzi- yes actually

Uzi- its for the ten year anniversary of me posting my music

Uzi- and grojband has always been on my list of inspiration for stepping into the music world

Uzi- right next to my parents and just the concept of making music

Uzi- the latter kinda outweighs the other two because the concept of making music is in itself a whole other inspiration 

Caden- How so?

Uzi- its kinda hard to explain 

Caden- Try me. 

Uzi- alright

Uzi- when im writing a song or im trying to sort out a melody, im not willa anymore 

Uzi- im a meld of sentience and music

Uzi- that sounds weird, let me try to rephrase that

Uzi- instead of becoming willa, the person performing and sharing the music, im like one with the music

Uzi- fuck, im really bad at explaining this without sounding pretentious or high

Uzi- ironically ive only ever been to properly explain it while high 

Caden- No, no. I think I get that. 

Caden- That’s really beautiful. You’re lucky you have something like that. 

Uzi- well it has its does have its ups and downs, but yeah its pretty cool

Uzi- is acting like that for you?

Caden- How’d you know I was an actor?

Uzi- you said you were a performer but that you couldn’t carry a tune to save your life 

Uzi- i just kinda guessed

Caden- Oh, well you’re right. 

Caden- And to answer your question, I love acting. 

Caden- It’s one of the few times I feel I can make my own choices. 

Caden- When I act, I get to become who I want to be in the moment. 

Caden- It goes all the way back to my first role. 

Uzi- what was that 

Caden- I don’t want to say. 

Uzi- why

Caden- It’ll make you realize who I am. Even though I don’t use my real name for the first film. 

Uzi- is there a story behind that

Caden- Yeah, it’s stupid. 

Uzi- no no, i wanna hear it

Caden- You really don’t, it’s just a story about me being a paranoid 11 year old. 

Uzi- cmon man, i wanna know

Uzi- or lady

Uzi- or person 

Uzi- or nothing at all

Uzi- point is, i wanna know

Caden- You got it right the first time, I’m a man!

Uzi- oh 

Uzi- cool

Uzi- now tell me the story 

Caden- Okay fine. 

Caden- When I was little my older sister would read me this book series about going to another world. 

Caden- I loved it, couldn’t get enough. 

Caden- At the time I always knew I wanted to be an actor and I dreamed of playing my favorite character in a movie adaptation. I’ll call him CB. 

Caden- CB wasn’t exactly a role I thought my parents would approve of. He was too much like me and they wanted my first major role to be the exact opposite of who I was to show how good of an actor I could be. 

Caden- So when I saw there was a movie adaptation of the books in the works, I knew I would be going for it whether they liked it or not. 

Caden- I waited for ages for the casting call announcement. 

Caden- It finally came the night of my 11th birthday. 

Caden- They were holding them near where I lived so it was going to be easy to sneak out and go. 

Caden- But the main issue was how known my parents were in the industry and I knew me auditioning for CB would find its way back to them somehow. 

Caden- So I went under a fake name and dragged my sister(the one who  read the books to me) to sign parental consent. 

Caden- She only agreed to keep it secret until I got the role. 

Caden- So I go in, and nail the audition. 

Caden- A few weeks of call backs later, I finally landed the roll. 

Caden- But it’s not under my real name and my parents still don’t know. And did I mention we were going to Canada to film. 

Uzi- oh no

Caden- Oh yes. 

Caden- So I told my parents what happened, the whole thing. And they were mad I didn’t tell them but they were also proud that I got the role.

Caden- They decided that the fake name I used would be my credit for the first movie. 

Uzi- oh my god

Uzi- that’s insane 

Caden- Yes but I really wanted to play CB so it was worth it. 

Uzi- to be fair i would have done the same

Uzi- running off to play the role of my dreams

Uzi- sounds like something i would do 

Caden- Yeah?

Uzi- yeah

Mon Dec 23 8:15 am

Uzi- early morning recording sessions/meetings suck ass

Uzi- especially when you dont have that much new music

Caden- I feel you, early morning shoots are the worst.

Caden- I take it you’re going to your recording studio?

Uzi- yup

Uzi- cant wait to tell everyone that i have writers block

Caden- How bad is it?

Uzi- horrible

Uzi- theres so much shit(good and bad) going on in my life and usually i sort my feelings out by writing 

Uzi- but i cant so i feel like an emotional wreck

Uzi- and i wanna yell at the devil more

Caden- Maybe you could make a challenge for yourself?

Caden- Like try to write music you’ve never written before. 

Caden- A different style or topic. 

Uzi- maybe

Uzi- you doing an early morning shoot?

Caden- Yes! I’m being driven on set right now!

Uzi- thats cool

Uzi- i think i have meeting about a movie today actually

Uzi- probably want me to write a song for a movie 

Uzi- because that went so well last time

Caden- What happened last time?

Uzi- a few years ago i wrote a song as a favor for someone 

Uzi- people were already mad at me for “selling out” because i took the opportunity to cowrite an album with a walking legend who just happens to more versed in the pop world than i am and has a label

Uzi- i myself do not have a record label, never have

Uzi- so to see me writing a song for a movie made people even more mad

Caden- That’s awful, I’m sorry. 

Uzi- not your fault people are stupid

Caden- Still. 

Caden- That happened to the vampire. They didn’t deserve it then either. 

Caden- It sucks, what people say. 

Uzi- yeah, it really does

Uzi- i got to go but, thanks 

Caden- No problem, good luck!

Uzi- you too

Mon Dec 23 12:47 pm

Willa- im writing a song for romcom now

Willa- pays good and the plot doesn’t seem too cliche, its a romcom with angst

N- Does that mean you’re writing a love song?

Willa- ew no

Willa- the song im writing is for the angsty scene, during “oh no they broke up” scene every romcom has

N- Well we’re romcom buddies now! Cause the movie I’m working on right now is a romcom. 

Willa- i guess so

Willa- send me lines so i can write more breakup angst

N- Will do!

Fri Dec 27 11:45 am

Uzi- what do you think of this lyric

Uzi- i don’t want to cut/but sometimes you got to bleed

Uzi- dark i know, but it fits for the scene(dw they dont end up cutting)

Uzi- thank god for this gig, cause now i get to use some stuff i wrote when i was morbidly depressed

Caden- Willa, are you okay?

Uzi- oh shit, i texted the wrong person 

Uzi- sorry that was meant for my friends 

Uzi- i usually test run lyrics with them

Uzi- just ignore the previous texts

Caden- You didn’t answer my question.

Caden- Are you okay?

Uzi- im fine

Caden- That lyric doesn’t sound like a lyric from someone who's fine. 

Uzi- i dont that any more, im fine caden

Caden- You promise?

Caden- Because I really don’t like the idea of you hurting yourself. 

Uzi- yes i promise 

Uzi- youve never met me in person tho, why does it matter to you 

Caden- I care about you, Willa. And I don’t like it when the people I care about are hurt. 

Uzi- you…care about me?

Uzi- weve only been talking for a few weeks 

Caden- Well yeah, I still care about you. I love getting to know you and talking to you. You matter to me Willa. 

Caden- Sorry was that too much?

Uzi- i care about you too caden. 

Tues Dec 31 7:53 pm

Willa- any new years plans?

N- Yeah, gala hosted by my parents. 

Willa- fancy

Willa- im just lounging around with my friends 

Willa- theyre trying to convince me to watch the land of stories movie adaptations

Willa- “weve never seen it before willa, cmon just the first movie!”

Willa- like jeez if you wanna watch it so bad, watch it without me

N- Why are they doing that?

Willa- it was my favorite book series as a kid

N- Really?

N- Not going to lie, from what I know about you that doesn’t seem like you. 

Willa- ugh bite me

Willa- everyone says that

Willa- but the books had surprisingly dark moments 

Willa- in book five, a guy literally wants to drain his sons blood and inject said blood into himself so that he has magic again

Willa- if i remember correctly he gets killed by zombies after the doctor/the twins mom drugs him

Willa- idk its been awhile since i read the books, ill probably do a reread this year

N- I should probably reread the books too. 

Willa- oh cool you read the books too

N- Yes, one of my favorite book series as a kid. 

Willa- you are a man of taste

N- Are you going to watch the movies?

Willa- nah

Willa- they do this every year, but i refuse to watch them 

N- Why?

Willa- because i hate movie adaptations

Willa- they ruin everything 

Willa- especially this franchise because everyone says theyre better than the books, which i dont think is possible 

Willa- i have the tag blocked everywhere on social media so that i dont come across it

Willa- although, the kids they casted for the bailey twins were allegedly the perfect choice 

Willa- idk who they were though, dont wanna look em up

Willa- have you seen the movies

N- Me?

N- No, I’m like you, I don’t like movie adaptations. 

N- Sorry, I gotta go. Dinner’s starting. 

Willa- thats okay, ill talk to you later

N- Talk to you later. 

N- Bye. 

Willa- bye

Sat Jan 4 1:37 pm

N- Do you ever have something that just sticks in your head?

Willa- hm yeah

Willa- like a lyric or melody 

Willa- why

N- I have one of my lines stuck in my head. 

Willa- for the romcom?

N- Yes. 

N- Normally the line doesn’t linger longer than it has to. 

Willa- what is it 

N- It’s a romance line. 

Willa- okay…

Willa- are you embarrassed to tell me

Willa- i mean i dont like romance anything but if its bugging you so much, ill suffer to try and help

N- Alright, here it is. 

N- They hate me. I hate them. But then they notice me and it feels like relief. Then they talk,  all I want to do is be near them. Then they smile, god when they smile, the world fades away and they're the only thing that matters. 

N- I don’t know why it’s stuck in my head but it is. 

Willa- i wish i knew what you sounded like

N- What?

Willa- idk, reading the line made me think of that

Willa- im not going to be able to help on this one, sorry

N- That’s okay Willa, I just wanted to get it out to another creative. 

Willa- its a goodish line tho 

Willa- i might have to change my stance on romance things to watch the movie

Willa- when we tell each other who we are one day

N- One day. 

Willa- one day

Sat Jan 4 11:59 pm

N- Hey Tess?

Tess The Best- Yes

N- Remember how you said to tell you when or if something got weird with Willa?

Tess The Best- Oh no, what did they do

N- Nothing. 

N- Things are getting weird inside me. 

N- I think I like them. 

A Bat, A Barbie, A Doll, A Football, and A Cowboy

Sun Jan 5 12:07 am

Uzi- guess what idiot got a crush on the stranger in her phone 

Uzi- me, im the idiot 

Chapter Text

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

love living with my roommates who all have different music tastes. i can go into the kitchen and start scream singing mcr while everyone else is scream singing their own favorite songs, creating a madhouse 

7/31/24 11:37 am

         Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

Of course you like MCR. 

7/31/24 11:41 am

          Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

dont knock it til you try my life of sin

7/31/24 11:43 am

            Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

Was that an RTC reference?

7/31/24 11:46 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

just found out that the worlds most irritating human being got my reference. this is the worst day ever

7/31/24 11:48 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

I take offense to that. 

7/31/24 11:51 am

           Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

good

7/31/24 11:57 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

Warm cups of jasmine green tea give me life. 

8/17/24 9:47 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

daily reminder that coffee is better than tea

8/17/24 9:57 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

Never did I think I would be having a coffee vs debate before an audition but here we are. PS, tea is better, quit lying to yourself. 

8/17/24 10:07 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

coffee is heaven after a night of energy drinks. you wouldnt understand. tea is just hot leaf juice 

8/17/24 10:10 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

Bad tea maybe. Tea is heaven, tea is life. You can drink it anytime you want because you can drink it without caffeine! And if tea is hot leaf juice than coffee is dirty bitter bean water. 

8/17/24 10:13 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

coffee is comfort after a hard morning. coffee wakes you up. you CAN drink it anytime you want because no one controls you. and news flash, coffee can be decaf 

8/17/24 10:17 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

And I’m just gonna go. I have better things to do. 

8/17/24 10:20 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

coward

8/17/23 10:24 am

Cyn Elliot @ therealcynthiaelliot

personally i think hot cocoa is the best drink but that’s just me 

8/17/24 10:30 am

           Cowboy @ batsrealcousin

you are correct 

8/17/24 10:32 am

           Cyn Elliot @ therealcynthiaelliot

*smiles* awww, thank you

8/17/24 10:35 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

whoever wrote me and my girls can die a slow and painful death. 

9/27/24 7:37 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

Say you don’t like pop without saying you don’t like pop. 

9/27/24 7:58 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

contrary to some peoples belief, the me and girls post was a reference to my cousins being annoying and blasting that song to wake me up. i actually like some pop

9/27/24 8:08 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

Prove it. Everyone, show you like pop by naming singers. 

9/27/24 8:14 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

challenge accepted. off the top my head id say, olivia rodrigo, chappell roan, ke$ha, baby queen, and sarah barrios 

9/27/24 8:28 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

You guys have some great choices. 

9/27/24 8:29 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

Horror movies should not give people ideas for pranks. V just showed up in my room with a fake knife and a hockey mask on. Scared the heck out of me. 

10/31/24 9:30 pm

                Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

lol, @vivianelliotwhoelse you are a genius and i raise my beanie to you

10/31/24 9:32 pm

                Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

Is my pain and suffering a joke to you?

10/31/24 9:33 pm

                 Bat With A Gub @ bw/ag

yes actually, its very amusing

10/31/24 9:34 pm

                 Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

You’re a very strange person. 

10/31/24 9:36 pm

                 Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

good thing we dont like each other, otherwise my personality would hurt you 

10/31/24 9:38 pm

                 Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

Yeah. Good thing. 

10/31/24 10:07 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

someone tell lizzy to stop trying to convince me to wear pink when we see wicked tomorrow . idc if its “on theme”. its green or black or youre getting neither color at all liz 

12/15/24 9:30 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

Always strange when someone who is such a one trick pony shows interest in something so different than what they actually do. 

12/15/24 9:32 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@therealnoahelliot IM a one trick pony? sir if thats the case, then youre a one note actor. i know that i have a specific sound but guess what? most musicians do

12/15/24 9:35 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

@bw/ag Okay yeah, most musicians have a specific sound but they play around for a bit before they choose it. You on the other hand have had the same sound since your cover days. And yeah I mostly act in romcoms but I don’t always. 

12/15/24 9:40 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@therealnoahelliot how do you know how ive sounded as far back as my cover days? and any way, my sound works for me and my music. your roles dont seem to work for you

12/15/24 9:42 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

@bw/ag I thought you didn’t watch my movies. 

12/15/24 9:45 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@therealnoahelliot ive read the synopsis to some of your movies and you always seem to play the sunshine love interest. that doesnt suit you

12/15/24 9:50 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot 

@bw/ag You are so strange. You don’t watch my movies and yet you look at the synopsis of some of them.

12/15/24 9:51 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@therealnoahelliot bite me, i do whatever the fuck i want 

12/15/24 9:55 am

Noah Elliot @ theralnoahelliot

@bw/ag You looking at the synopsis for my movies aside, it is fine that you have one sound. I will admit, it sounds good but still. You have got to branch out more.

12/15/24 10:00 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@therealnoahelliot and do what? love songs? like how you do romcoms

12/15/24 10:02 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot

@bw/ag I mean it wouldn’t hurt to try. 

12/15/24 10:03 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@therealnoahelliot me writing a love song? thats like you not acting in a romcom

12/15/24 10:07 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot

@bw/ag For the last time I have acted in more than just romcoms! I’m just more well known for them.

12/15/24 10:10 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@therealnoahelliot havent heard about them so idc. besides even if you have acted in more than just romcoms, i sincerely doubt you can do an emotional scene that doesnt have to do with romance

12/15/24 10:13 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot

@bw/ag If you think that then that leads me to believe that your refusal to write a love song isn’t because you don’t want to. It’s because you can’t.

12/15/24 10:14 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@therealnoahelliot you dont know shit about me or my writing abilities

12/15/24 10:17 am

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot

@bw/ag I’m just saying it how I see it.

12/15/24 10:19 am

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

then you must have really bad eyesight

12/15/24 10:22 am

Chapter Text

Sent on January 10th 2025 At 10:30 am

To: Uzi Doorman

From: Copper-9 Productions

Dear Miss Doorman,

Thank you again for sending in your lyrics before trying to record, it made it easier for us to assess whether or not the song is ready!

However, we did have some concerns about how sad the song is. When we asked you to write the song, we were hoping it would be more breakup focused. Especially since the song will be playing after Mars and Chris’ breakup. If you could, please revise the song to be more breakup-esque. 

We did like the reference to cutting, it felt very fitting for the moment in the bathroom.

Thank you again agreeing to work with us!

Best, Blaze Utonium 

A Bat, A Barbie, A Doll, A Football, and A Cowboy

Fri Jan 10 10:28 am

Uzi- they want me to write a breakup song

Knock off Barbie- oh shit

Uzi- yup

Uzi- they liked my references to cutting tho, so theres that

Football- you gonna be okay zi?

Cowboy- you haven’t written a breakup song since the two devils 

Doll stop changing your contact name- remember, you can drop out from writing the song anytime you want. 

Uzi- idk how to feel 

Uzi- i hate breakup songs just as much as i hate love songs

Uzi- but since i dont talk about the former as much, people dont know

Uzi- fml

Knock off Barbie- oh zi

Football- do you need to take the day off?

Uzi- maybe

Uzi- i just…really dont want to write that type of song right now

Doll stop changing your contact name- wow, he’s affecting you that much?

Uzi- yeah

Cowboy- must be serious 

Uzi- shut it

Uzi- feelings are dumb and stupid and i hate them

Uzi- i cant even write music without thinking about them

Cowboy- oh uzi

Cowboy- you really like him don’t you

Uzi- thats classified information 

Knock off Barbie- she totes does

Doll stop changing your contact name- leave zi be, she’s having a time right now. 

Football- yeah, let her breathe

Uzi- im just gonna chill in my room and order lip stuff

Uzi- need to test new stuff for concerts

Fri Jan 10 12:37 pm

Caden- Can I ask you something?

Uzi- yes

Uzi- but i might refuse to answer it

Caden- Never hurts to try!

Caden- Why do you hate love songs?

Uzi- damn dude

Uzi- that has a messy answer

Caden- I don’t mind hearing it if you’re worried about me being bored. 

Caden- I like listening to anything you say. 

Caden- Well technically read what you text. 

Caden- I like doing it is my point. 

Uzi- k

Uzi- idek how to start

Caden- Take your time.

Uzi- okay i think have a clearish answer 

Uzi- ive never really liked love songs

Uzi- my dad was a musician and he retired when i was six

Uzi- growing up he used sing and write so many love songs for my mom

Uzi- i thought they were really annoying but she loved them

Uzi- so i resented them for making my parents act grosser than they already did

Uzi- and then i became a teenager 

Uzi- people realized that i wasnt just the weird music kid anymore 

Uzi- i was the weird music kid who actually knew how to make good music 

Uzi- somehow that made people like me, because they wanted songs written about them

Uzi- my first partner expected me to write a song about them

Uzi- i never did so they broke up with me

Uzi- it hurt more than it should 

Uzi- and then i was stupid, i let it happen again 

Uzi- the second time it happened, i swore off writing/covering/performing a love song ever

Uzi- but yeah, thats basically why i hate love songs 

Caden- I hate that they did that to you. 

Caden- Not your parents, but everyone else…

Caden- They can go rot. 

Caden- You didn’t deserve that. 

Uzi- thanks

Uzi- it just sucks that two times ive dated someone, they only wanted me to write a song about them

Caden- Fuck them. 

Uzi- holy shit did you just swear?

Caden- Yes I did, because fuck them, they didn’t deserve you Willa.

Uzi- uzi

Caden- What?

Uzi- my name, its uzi 

Caden- Oh. 

Caden- Hey Uzi!

Caden- My name’s N!

Uzi- n, huh

Uzi- for some reason that suits you

Chapter Text

Sent on January 10th 2025 At 12:30 pm

To: Copper-9 Productions

From: Uzi Doorman

Dear Mr Utonium,

I got your email and I understand the concern about the music being more breakup focused. I will begin revising the song when I get a chance. 

Here’s the thing though, my writing process goes a lot easier when I am either a) writing about my experiences or b) know more about what’s happening in the story. Sending me the script was very helpful but I would love to be on set while you’re filming the scene my song will be playing. That way I can have the full scope on what to write. 

If that is not possible, is there any way I could be on set so that I could talk to the person playing Mars or meet them in person sometime? Just to see what they think about Mars and the bathroom scene. 

Either way works and would be extremely helpful to me.

Thank you. 

-Uzi Doorman

Sent on January 10th 2025 At 2:30 pm

To: Uzi Doorman

From: Copper-9 Productions

Dear Miss Doorman,

We would be delighted to have you on set! We’ll also give you Mira Suarez’s(the actor playing Mars) number so that you can ask for further details. Filming for the bathroom scene will take place on January 18th at the Copper-9 Productions back lot. We will send a driver to take you.

There is one concern we have though. The actor playing Chris is Noah Elliot and he will be on set that day. We are fully aware about the ongoing issues the two of you have with each other and want to make sure that you are aware of this before you arrive on set. Mr Elliot will be informed as well once you have confirmed coming on set.

Sincerely, Blaze Utonium

Mars’ phone number: (***) - *** - ****

Sent on January 10th 2025 At 3:07 pm

Dear Mr Utonium,

Noah being on set is not a problem at all. Despite our differences, I’m sure we can act civil with each other long enough to get our jobs done.

Thank you for telling me though, instead of surprising me with it.

I do have one request. When you inform Noah, do not use my real name. Just use Bat With A Gun or Bat. The same goes when I am on set. In fact, don’t use my real name at all.

I will see you on the 18th.

-Uzi Doorman

A Bat, A Barbie, A Doll, A Football, and A Cowboy

Fri Jan 10 3:19 pm

Uzi- and just when i thought it couldnt get worse

Uzi- it did

Knock off Barbie- what happened

Uzi- so i email them back, explaining that being on set the best way for me to make the song they want

Uzi- they agreed to have me on set, even seem excited about it

Doll stop changing your contact name- that doesn't sound so bad.

Cowboy- do you just not want to be on set

Uzi- no, i do

Football- then what’s wrong

Uzi- noah elliot is casted in this damn movie and will be on set the same day i am

Knock off Barbie- hes playing mars?

Cowboy- wait isnt mars enby?

Uzi- yes to beau, no to lizzy

Uzi- mars being played by mira suarez

Doll stop changing your contact name- he’s playing chris then.

Uzi- yep

Football- what did you tell them

Uzi- i told them it was fine

Cowboy- what

Knock off Barbie- srsly

Doll stop changing your contact name- you’re kidding.

Football- did you hit your head

Uzi- what are you people talking about

Knock off Barbie- sry, its just i thought u would refuse to be on set

Football- yeah zi, the two of you have been at each other's throats for the past few months online

Football- being in the same room as him and agreeing to it doesn't sound like you

Cowboy- normally you’d go on a rampage

Uzi- im too tired for that

Doll stop changing your contact name- do you want one of us to come with you?

Uzi- no, im just gonna go on my own

Uzi- ill be fine

Uzi- i think

Fri Jan 10 7:39 pm

N- I just got the worst news ever.

💜Uzi💜- lay it on me

N- The Vampire is working on a song for the movie.

N- And they’re going to be on set so that they can get inspiration for the song since we’re filming the scene that the song is in.

💜Uzi💜- ugh that sucks

💜Uzi💜- are you going to be in that scene

N- No, but I am going to be on set that day.

N- Filming some of my own angst scenes.

💜Uzi💜- its an angsty scene?

N- Yes and I understand why they hired The Vampire to write the song.

N- Angsty songs are their specialty after all.

N- But still, the producers know my issues with them.

💜Uzi💜- why would they even have them on set

N- The Vampire likes to have direct inspiration for whatever they write.

N- Whether it’s personal or inspired from other media, it's just how they write.

💜Uzi💜- when are they going to be on set

💜Uzi💜- i can drive up and save ypu if you need me to

N- Aw that’s very sweet of you Uzi!

💜Uzi💜- bite me, im not sweet

N- You are though!

N- And to answer your question, they’ll be on set on the 18th.

💜Uzi💜- the 18th

💜Uzi💜- thats…interesting

N- Are you okay Uzi?

💜Uzi💜- hm, yeah im fine

💜Uzi💜- sorry, i gotta go

💜Uzi💜- just heard one of my roommates get back with dinner

💜Uzi💜- ttyl okay

N- Oh okay Uzi.

N- Bye!

💜Uzi💜- bye

A Bat, A Barbie, A Doll, A Football, and A Cowboy

Fri Jan 10 7:55 pm

Uzi- hey let me ask you something

Uzi- what does it mean when the stranger on your phone whose not really a stranger anymore and is also an actor who is filming a movie right now complains about a musician who they dont get along coming on set

Uzi- and the day the musician is coming in on set is the same day you yourself are going on set for a movie and the musician is going for the exact same reasons as you are

Uzi- because i am stumped

Chapter Text

A Bat, A Barbie, A Doll, A Football, and A Cowboy

Fri Jan 10 8:09 pm

Knock off Barbie- like you think hes noah orrrr

Uzi- i mean it in a isnt it strange kinda way

Uzi- i dont actually think n is noah elliot 

Knock off Barbie- uzi babes

Knock off Barbie- i luv u, but u cannot be this stupid

Uzi- im just asking

Football- zi, sounds like its him

Uzi- it cant be him

Uzi- noah is completely different from n

Cowboy- you sound like you’re in denial 

Uzi- no im not, bite me

Uzi- doll what do you think

Doll stop changing your contact name- uzi willa sidney doorman.

Doll stop changing your contact name- you were raised by one of the smartest women i know and your father is technically smart as well.

Doll stop changing your contact name- you yourself are admittedly a genius(and i will never say that again so enjoy it).

Doll stop changing your contact name- yet you still are one of the dumbest people i know.

Doll stop changing your contact name- if that boy in your phone is not noah elliot, i will give you $500. but i’m pretty sure he is so i will take that bet.

Uzi- ugh screw you

Uzi- i have decided that this is an argument that needs further evidence

Uzi- as of right now it is only a MINOR possibility that n is noah elliot

Uzi- and when i go on set in a week i will go under this assumption

Uzi- BUT that doesnt mean its him

Knock off Barbie- ur an idiot jfc

Football- amen to that

Cowboy- couldn’t have said it better myself

Doll stop changing your contact name- why do i even try?

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

rereading the classics in between working on new music. its been giving me ideas for more new music

(image attachment)

[Image ID: A book is sitting on a bed with pens and paper strewn around it. The book’s title is The Land Of Stories: The Wishing Spell. The cover has famous fairytale characters all over it with two children falling in the center.]

1/12/2025 1:54 pm

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot

Do they know? Like seriously, do they know?

1/12/25 1:56 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@therealnoahelliot i feel like that last tweet was directed at me. wth are you talking about now

1/12/25 1:59 pm

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot

@bw/ag Oh my gosh, you really don’t know. I can’t believe it.

1/12/25 2:02 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@therealnoahelliot are you okay dude?

1/12/25 2:04 pm

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot

@bw/ag I was Conner in the film adaptation.

1/12/25 2:06 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

oh for fucks sakes

1/12/25 2:08 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

of course he was in those fucking movies, of course he was

1/12/25 2:09 pm

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot

Not a fan, I take it? @bw/ag

1/12/25 2:11 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

@therealnoahelliot i never watched them, actually. and now that i know you played conner, im never going to

1/12/25 2:13 pm

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

also daily reminder for those of you who need it, the tlos books were better than the movies and its okay to like the books more. i know were probably in the minority here, but its true

1/12/25 2:15 pm

noahbat for life @ ohmyheart

the more the drama goes on, the more noah and bat seem to be flirting. did y’all see how bat immediately knew noah was talking about them? they’re dating your honor

1/12/25 3:00 pm

wingbats @ batwings

at this point, i’m convinced that bat and noah are dating and just doing this to keep us on our toes. don’t boo me, y’all know i’m right. this is the type of thing bat would do to soft launch their relationship

1/12/25 3:02 pm

noah <3 @ noah<3

@batwings I’m not even a big bat fan, just a casual listener to their music and you have no idea how right you are

1/12/25 3:04 pm

Noah’s girl @ noahsgirl

Why are you people shipping Noah and Bat? Bat is fucking toxic and doesn’t deserve the sweet ray of sunshine that is Noah. Wake up people!

1/12/25 3:06 pm

DragonTrainer23 @ dragontrainer23

@noahsgirl You know those two are arguing like a married couple, right?

1/12/25 3:10 pm

bat is queen @ #1batfan

so when this drama all started and i found noahbat was an actual ship i vowed not to ship it. but uh, y’all make compelling arguments and have good points so i started to keep them on my radar. then my friend made me read ‘good thing we don’t like each other(yeah good thing)’ and fuck, i can’t help it! THEY”RE JUST SO HDHDHEHEBEGEH

1/12/25 3:11 pm

#noahbat

1.9k followers/691 new posts

Latest||Top

Howisthismylife

Hey guys, it’s me again! Back on my noahbat bullshit. As of today, we have official confirmation that Bat is a TLOS fan which has been speculated on for ages. Noah responded in a semi flirty way to Bat, subtly implying how he played Conner. He did not tag Bat. Bat responded immediately and assumed that he was referencing them.

They were right of course, but I think it’s funny that Bat is keeping track of Noah talking about them without actually talking them

#noah elliot #bat with a gun #bw/ag #noahbat

Posted on Jan 12 2025

batsaysbiteme

latest noahbat interaction has got me writing a new chapter for my fic. they make me so iufwegfwyyu

#noahbat

Posted on Jan 12 2025

noahthegoldenretriever

Okay so this is a common misconception that keeps bugging me. I keep seeing people post about how they didn’t know Noah was gay while also questioning what Bat’s gender is. I want it to be known that Noah has stated that he is pan for YEARS. We don’t know if Bat is a boy or not. They have stated before that their loved ones use different pronouns for them than the ones they use online. Do we need to know what those pronouns are? No we do not.

#noah elliot #bat with a gun #bw/ag #noahbat

Posted on Jan 12 2025

Lalalala

Me: I want what they have.

My friends: Who?

Me: Noah and Bat.

My friends: Don’t they hate each other?

Me: No, they’re clearly in love. How can you not tell?

My friends: 

My friends: Do you hear yourself?

#this is all in good fun #they just think i missed a few steps #i didn’t #bat and noah just speak to me #iykyk #noah elliot #bat with a gun #bw/ag #noahbat

Posted on Jan 12 2025

There were eight times Uzi knew her life had changed for good. 

The first time was when she was four and her mom wanted time to herself so she went with her dad to a writing session with his band. Blake, the pianist, asked her if she wanted to try and play the piano with them. She said yes,  and to this day she still remembered Blake’s hands over her own, guiding her how to play. In that moment, Uzi knew she wanted to be a musician. That she WAS going to be a musician. 

The second time was when she met Lizzy and Thad at the park a year later. Uzi didn’t like going to the park to play on the playground. She liked to listen to music while she drew. Her mom liked it too, so they would go multiple times per week. Nori would write her books and Uzi would draw, music playing softly from a speaker while they sat on a picnic blanket. One day, a little blonde girl approached them and asked what they were listening to. Uzi had just said “Momma’s mixtapes.” Because that’s what Nori called her playlists. The girl said she liked the songs and so did her brother, then she asked if they could join them. Uzi had glanced at Nori, hoping that her mom would say yes. She did and all of a sudden Uzi had two best friends who had her back no matter what. 

The third time was when she was nine and she got her first guitar. It was for her birthday and in the months beforehand, she had been taking guitar lessons to prove that she was serious about wanting the instrument. When her dad presented the guitar to her, it was like there was a halo around it. The first time she held the guitar, Uzi knew she was going to make her own original music with it. 

The fourth time was when she posted her first cover on YouTube when she was fourteen. The cover was of ‘Somebody Told Me’. It had done okay the first few months surprisingly, for as crappy as the audio and visuals were and she got monetized because of it. Still, it showed her that people had faith in her ability to create. 

The fifth time was when she was seventeen and ‘Numb’ blew up. It happened overnight. When she went to bed, she had 50k subscribers on YouTube. When she woke up she had 200k. And the numbers just kept going up. Bat With A Gun was trending all over the place, questions swirling about who the mysterious singer was. Little did they know that Bat was just a scared almost eighteen year old. That they were just Uzi. But at the same time, it just confirmed four year old Uzi’s theory that she was meant to create music. 

The sixth time was when she was nineteen and fucking Alexis Vega asked to collab with her. And not just for one song, a whole album. When she got the request it was like she was dreaming. Uzi knew she made it when she agreed and Alexis responded saying how excited she was to work with Uzi. She knew she had made it when she entered Alexis’s studio for the first time. That she had proven herself as someone worth taking seriously when it came to music. And that she had done without using her dad’s name to get there, something she was always scared of doing and never knowing if she was truly good or not. 

The seventh was when she was twenty four and texted a wrong number. A dork of a stranger texted her back. She thought he was cool so she kept texting him, thinking that she would get a friend out of it. In the end, it was SO much more.  It started slow at first, the two of them warming up to each other. But then she caught feelings, bad. And every time N texted, Uzi’s heart soared, the way Nori said hers did when she saw Khan. It felt wrong yet so amazing that she was falling for someone, something that she never thought would happen to her. Not after Rebecca and Darrin. 

The eighth time was when she realized that the person she was crushing on was quite possibly the same person she had been arguing with online for the past few months like a child. Unfortunately, she couldn’t let him know that she thought that, so yelling at him online would have to continue.

Even if she really didn’t want to.

Especially now as she scrolled the noahbat tag on twitter and tumblr because the fans version of Noah was so much like N it was too much to be a coincidence. The fans were very invested in this “relationship” that apparently existed. Uzi had to give them credit, the fans were really creative. 

One tweet in particular caught her eye. It was from one of her fans talking about how they got converted because of a fanfic. Uzi paused. There was fanfic of them? Uzi knew there was plenty of fanfic out there on her, a drinking game she and her friends had was based on reading those fanfics and taking a shot each time something specific to her fandom came up. 

How bad of an idea would it be if she went to the AO3 noahbat tag? Probably a bad one but it would be cool to see what the fans thought her relationship with Noah(who might be N) would be interesting. Maybe it could give her a peak to what a real relationship with N could be like.

You know, if he did turn out to be Noah.

Eh couldn’t hurt to check.

Noah Elliot/Bat With A Gun

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good thing we don’t like each other(yeah good thing)

Last Updated: Jan 1 2025

Fandom: RPF

Rating: Explicit

Relationship:  Noah Elliot/Bat With A Gun

Characters: Noah Elliot, Bat With A Gun, Cynthia Elliot, Tessa Elliot, Vivian Elliot, Jayden Elliot, Lizzy Nikolopulous, Thad Nikolopulous, Cowboy(Bat’s Cousin), Bat’s Female Cousin

Tags: Non-binary Bat, Enemies To Lovers, Smut, Fluff, Angst, Noah fell first but Bat fell harder, it gets worse before it gets better, Enemies With Benefits, Idiots In Love, They also hate each other occasionally, College AU

Summary- They had done this dance multiple times. Argue about something stupid, fuck, sleep, one of them leaves first, repeat. It’s routine at this point. It’s a good thing they don’t like each other, with anyone else this would be hell.

Chapter Text

Uzi glared at the fruit salad Lizzy had put in front of her. 

“What’s with the face?” Lizzy asked, poking some buttons on the coffee machine. Uzi rolled her eyes, Lizzy knew full well she was scowling.

“It’s the 18th.” Uzi said tiredly. She picked up her fork and stabbed a grape. 

“I'm meeting a guy I’ve been fighting with online for the past six months.” 

He was also the same guy she had been reading fanfic about for the past few days as well. Fanfic that shipped her with him. Surprisingly a lot of the fics were good. And there was less smut than she thought there would be. Uzi may have read one or two smut fics. Or all of the ones that sounded interesting. 

Lizzy nodded, whether in sympathy or understanding Uzi didn’t know(though she probably wouldn’t be sympathetic if she knew what Uzi had been reading these past few days), and handed her a plate of toast. It was Lizzy’s turn to cook breakfast so she and Uzi were the only two people in the kitchen.

“You’ll do fine Zi, you’ve survived worse. Hell, you’ve written songs about worse.” Lizzy said.

Uzi put the grape in her mouth and chewed it aggressively. Writing songs about her pain was nothing compared to this. At least then she had control over the narrative with that. With this, Uzi had no control whatsoever and she hated it. 

“Of course I’ll do fine. I’m Uzi Doorman, it’s impossible for me to do bad.” Uzi said, swallowing the grape. She stabbed some melon off her plate while Lizzy finally got the coffee machine to work.

“Right. But you're still nervous.” Lizzy said, grabbing Uzi’s favorite mug.

Uzi scoffed. “Me nervous? Bite me, that’s preposterous!” Uzi exclaimed, while lying. Why she was lying, she didn’t know. Lizzy could read her like a book and knew when she was lying as soon as she opened her mouth.

Lizzy sighed, very clearly tired of her. 

“Are you sure you’re okay? I haven’t heard you use the word preposterous since you first showed us ‘Why Am I Alive’.” Lizzy asked, her voice gentle. 

Uzi flinched. “I’m fine Lizzy.” She mumbled.

Lizzy didn’t look convinced. “Zizi, don’t lie to me. I know you don’t want to act like it, but this is a big moment. Maybe not on the same level as your usual big moments, but still big.”

Uzi looked away from her, opting instead to look at the living room. This way she wouldn’t have to answer. It also was a pleasant distraction because the living room was by far the biggest and the weirdest part of the apartment. Granted the apartment was always going to look weird, with everyone’s different aesthetics after all, but the living room took the cake. Where the tv stood was fine, normal even.

But the rest of the room was a mishmash of everyone’s tastes. From Lizzy’s mannequins with half sewn dresses, to Beau’s homemade coffee table, it was certainly a sight to behold. It was also her favorite place in the apartment outside of her room. 

The living room was where they showed their appreciation of music. Two little cubed shelves held CDs, cassettes, and records. In between the shelves on a small table was a CD player, record player, and cassette player combination thing Nori had bought Uzi for her 21st birthday along with a 6 pack of beer. Shoved in the corner of the room was Doll’s baby grand piano. It technically was Uzi’s too but Doll used it more. On the walls were Uzi various instruments on their stands, waiting to be used. Her electric guitar, her acoustic guitar, her bass and so on. Uzi smiled softly when her gaze flitted to Beau’s banjo. Mindlessly, Uzi wondered if she should bring her guitar with her to set.

Lizzy snapped her fingers in front of Uzi’s face suddenly.

“Stop staring at the living room. You don’t have to answer what I said before but please stop doing that. It’s creepy.” Lizzy said.

Uzi shook her head free from her thoughts while Lizzy poured her some coffee before sliding the mug over to her. 

“Sorry Liz, just thinking thoughts.” Uzi mumbled, taking the mug gratefully. Silently she sipped her coffee while Thad wandered into the kitchen. 

Lizzy smirked as he sat down next to Uzi and stole a piece of her toast, making her squawk in annoyance and smack his hand.

“You’re up early.” Lizzy observed. Thad shrugged and took a bite of the stolen toast. 

“Wanted to support the purple demon over there before she left.” He said, nodding towards Uzi. 

Uzi scowled and snatched up her own piece of toast to gnaw on. 

“Oh shut up Thad. I’m fine.” She snapped. 

At that Lizzy scoffed while Thad merely rolled his eyes. 

“Rightttt. And my lower back has suddenly healed and I can play football again.” He said sarcastically. 

“You should have heard her earlier, I think the word preposterous was used.” Lizzy said, picking at her nails. 

Uzi looked away from the two of them, embarrassed. Damnit, Thad and Lizzy truly could read her like a book. Probably could write a whole book about her. 

“Okay, maybe I am a little nervous.” Uzi admitted. 

“Knew it.” Lizzy said in a singsong voice. 

“Not about much though. I’m only worried that I might start a fight with Noah and get kicked off set before I get a break through.” Uzi added quickly. 

“And?” Thad prompted, trying to get her to say more. Uzi shrugged. 

“I don’t know what you want me to add.” She said, feeling slightly victorious. Maybe she had won this discussion. 

“How about being worried that he finds out you read fanfic shipping the two of you together.” Lizzy said casually. 

Uzi choked on her toast, causing Thad to whack her on the back to dislodge the food.

“H-How do you know about that?” Uzi asked nervously. 

“I needed a laptop to check my email cause mine was dead and yours was the closest so I grabbed it. Apparently you’re subscribed to one of them.” Lizzy said while Thad held back laughter. Uzi’s face was going bright red and she knew it. 

“It’s for research purposes!” She exclaimed, a little embarrassed but she felt a small bubble of laughter grow. 

“What research purposes?” Thad asked, his face growing purple as he held back the laughter. 

“To see if we’re as compatible as our fans say.” Uzi explained before a big burst of laughter came out of her.

“Well, are you?” Lizzy asked, the only one of the three of them who had a straight face. 

“In the fan verse, yes. In reality, I don’t know, I haven’t properly met the guy. Probably not though.” Uzi said through laughter. Thad meanwhile was dying of laughter at how ridiculous the conversation was. 

“At least you know that.” Lizzy conceded. 

Uzi nodded as it dawned on her what Lizzy had just done. She made one of Uzi’s biggest concerns about today seem bearable and even funny with just a few words. 

Maybe today would be okay after all. 

“Hair and makeup Noah, we’ll send someone to get you when you’re ready.”

N had just gotten onto the sound stage when Blaze gave him his request. He nodded and quickly walked out. As he walked to where the hair and makeup trailer was, he noticed crew members looking at him strangely. N didn’t blame them, he looked nothing like his usual put together self. He barely got any sleep last night and what he did get happened while his alarm was going off and he overslept. He had barely enough time to get dressed, let alone have his usual cup of tea to wake himself up. And it was all thanks to Bat. 

N would always remember the day he found Bat’s music. 

He was sixteen and Cyn had just found out about Heathers. Which then caused her to make a playlist on all the covers and different versions of the songs she could find. She enlisted N to find more of them so he went on YouTube to see if he could find more than what she had already found. 

It was hard at first. Cyn had picked through everyone and anyone he found she had found already. But then, Bat posted a cover so when he refreshed the page for the upteenth time, their version of ‘Dead Girl Walking(reprise)’ was there. It was a nightcore cover with an animated music video loop that Bat had made with their cousin. One click was all it took. Just one click and he was done for. 

Their sound was nothing he had heard before, growing up around musicals, classical, and pop thanks to Cyn, Tessa, and J. He didn’t even know what V listened to but he knew it wasn’t this. 

By the time his siblings found him in the morning, N had followed Bat on any of their social media platforms he could find, ordered their merch(official and fan-made), and was sobbing over their covers in his bedroom. At the time Bat only had 20K followers but also a dedicated fanbase(that he himself was a part of on his secret fan account). He lurked a lot, scrolling through every tag related to them. He listened as their voice grew and matured. He grasped any detail and bit of information he could get on them. 

N was there for every big moment in Bat’s career. From ‘Numb’ to  their third album ‘cut the bullshit’. He was there for all of it. And they didn’t even know. He doubted they even knew he existed back then before everything, but that was okay. He was lucky enough to know their music, he didn’t expect Bat to know who he was.

Because of all this, N was actually a tiny bit excited to meet Bat in person today. Despite the petty feud they had, he still loved their music. Though he was trying to do what Uzi told him to do by separating the art from the artist. It was still hard unfortunately, he found Bat’s music when he needed it most. Sixteen year old him was a part of him and that part of him loved Bat.

But there was still dread. A LOT of dread.

And it was getting worse the closer he got to hair and makeup. So much so that he wasn’t paying attention to his surroundings and he ran into someone before tripping on his own feet and falling on them. 

Uzi adjusted her face mask before stepping outside to the front of the sound stage.

She’d almost grabbed one of her concert masks to shield her face but then realized it was overkill so she just did some really dramatic eye makeup and a face mask. From what she remembered, Mr Utonium said that the driver would drop her off in front of the specific sound stage they would be filming the scene at, but that she was free to roam outside a bit before she went in to get an extra feel of things. Confirming what he said by double checking her email, Uzi gripped her bag strap tighter and tucked her phone back into her pocket.

She wanted to talk to Mira in person before she went in there but she didn’t know where to find them. Not wanting to bother anyone, Uzi guessed they would be at hair and makeup since the bathroom was going to need more special effects makeup. Mindlessly, Uzi rubbed her arms where her scars were as she started to walk. ‘Maybe they could use mine as a reference.’ Uzi thought jokingly. Then shook her head free of the thought. Going down that path was never a good one for her.

As Uzi wandered around the studio lot, it hit her how different this song’s writing process was compared to writing ‘Eternal Dreams’. ‘Eternal Dreams’ had been in the works since the book got published. It was one of her first original songs and it had been in a journal half finished until her mom asked her to write a song for the movie. And it was finished during COVID, a time where she had nothing to do but write music. Now though, she was a time constraint with barely any ideas, trying to take inspiration from a story she didn’t really know. It was going to be hard, but she was always up for a challenge.

It was fascinating to see all the crew members rushing around and stuff ready for filming. Murder Drones had been CGI. Not at a live action production like this. Maybe, since the set was pretty big, she wouldn’t run into him. Maybe it would be a good day after all. 

And maybe it would have, if someone hadn’t ran into her. 

Now, Uzi was used to this. Usually she was the one running into the other person but it still happened. She stumbled slightly before catching herself but that turned out to be for nothing because the person stumbled on their feet and proceeded to fall on her. Uzi hissed in pain as her elbow hit the ground in her attempt to break her landing without falling on her bag. The person landed on top of her and her vision was clouded by blonde hair. They quickly scrambled off her, saying a bunch of apologies as they stood up.

“Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry! I wasn’t paying attention. Here let me help you.” They said, holding a hand out towards her. Uzi lifted her up to see what they looked like, just to make sure they didn’t give her a bad feeling. But who she saw was so much worse.

Standing in front of her was Noah Elliot, and he actually looked ashamed? Clearly he didn’t know who she was. Shaking her head, Uzi slowly stood up, allowing Noah to connect the dots. Probably wasn’t that hard, she was wearing a hoodie with a bat on. Granted it was just a cartoon but not her own mascot, but still. Noah looked like a mess. His hair was disheveled and he had eye bags under his eyes like he hadn’t slept well. He had also very clearly thrown on whatever he first saw when he woke up this morning, he was wearing a wrinkled dress shirt with sweatpants.

Their eyes met and she smirked underneath the mask when the realization of who she was dawned on him.

“Bat.” He said flatly, like it wasn’t the first time they were. Aw well, two could play at that game.

“Noah.” She said, crossing her arms.

“Here to ruin a love song?” Noah said, seeming pleased with his insult.

“Nope. Why would I write a love song? Thought you knew me better than that.” She teased. From what she had gathered from obsessively checking noahbat stuff a week ago, he had apparently been a fan of hers before the start of their twitter arguments.

“I don’t know you at all.” Noah said, though his expression was slightly worried for a split second.

“That’s funny because didn’t you once say that I’ve always had the same sound since my cover days. Seems like you’d have to listen that far back in my music catalog to know that.” Uzi said, amused. She watched with mild curiosity at how he tried to figure out how to respond to her.

“If I remember correctly, you also said that you’ve read the synopsis for some of my movies. And apparently you went far back enough to deduce that there’s a type of character I always play.” He said smoothly.

“I-” Uzi said, feeling a bit out of her league now.

“You what?” Noah said, his tone teasing.

Uzi felt her face heat up. She had flown to close the sun and was now paying the price as she scrambled to find a response.

“Ugh! Bite me!” She exclaimed finally. Noah looked pleased with himself. Clearly very proud of himself. He opened his mouth, probably to say something that would let her re-.

“Bat?”

Uzi turned around at the call of her name. Standing a few steps away from her and Noah was Mira.

Uzi had met Mira on a few occasions before the movie had been conceived. Mira’s boyfriend was one of the people that ran the recording studio she went to. More often than not Uzi had seen them hanging around the studio talking to people. Never in her life had Uzi been more grateful to see them.

“Mira!” Uzi said quickly, turning her back to Noah.

“I’ve been looking for you.”

Mira laughed. “I just got here. I’m on my way to the costume trailer. Am I interrupting something?” They asked, glancing between Noah and Uzi.

Uzi shook her head quickly. “No, no. You actually came at the perfect time. In fact, let's go right now!” She exclaimed, trying not to make eye contact with Noah as she moved closer to Mira.

Mira raised an eyebrow. “Okay, you’re certainly eager.” They said.

“Just ready to make the best breakup song I possibly can! Let’s get out of here so I can get a head start on it.” Uzi said, all but shoving Mira away from Noah.

“Alright, alright. Just stop shoving. Also you’re going the wrong way, the costume trailer is to the left, not the right.” Mira said, nudging her in the right direction.

As they walked away, Uzi could feel Noah’s eyes boring into her back. She let out a sigh of relief. Well at least now she knew for sure that he wasn’t N. That whole stupid conversation proved that he and N were too different to be the same person.

As N watched Bat walk away with Mira, his mind started reeling.

What was that? N had never acted like that before in his life. All weird and kinda mean. It was like he couldn’t help it. Once he could tell that Bat was blushing under that face mask, it was like he had to keep going. He needed to make them blush like that. He liked watching them squirm under his gaze when they didn't know how to respond.

It felt like payback for all the times their songs made him feel that way. And boy did it feel good to know that to some degree, he affected them the same way they affected him.

He grinned quietly. Today was going to be interesting.

Chapter Text

Sat Jan 18 9:23 am

Uzi- fucking save me

Cowboy- what’s up zi

Cowboy- you good?

Uzi- no

Uzi- he flirted with me

Uzi- sort of

Uzi- i think

Uzi- he made me not know how to respond to how respond and i could not stop blushing

Uzi- i dont get flirted with often so i dont know

Cowboy- uh

Cowboy- why are you telling me this?

Cowboy- out of everyone i’m the worst person to talk to about this

Cowboy- also why are you texting me, aren’t you supposed to be talking to mira and taking notes for your song 

Uzi- 1)  lizzy and thad would tease me, doll would be cryptic. you are literally the only who would try to be helpful 

Uzi- 2) miras getting changed so im waiting outside the costume trailer so that they can have some privacy 

Uzi- now help me out!

Cowboy- zi, i would love to help you 

Cowboy- but people don’t flirt me either

Cowboy- how am i supposed to help you

Uzi- you know what never mind

“Damn, the costume department did an amazing job on your outfit.”

N blinked in confusion at the sound of Serena’s voice, her words barely registering.

“What?” He said, shuffling over to the open chair in front of Serena. 

“You’re filming the “They hate me, I hate them” scene today, right?” She asked, grabbing his designated makeup bag. 

“Yes? What does that have to do with my outfit?” He asked, very much confused. 

“Chris is supposed to look like a complete mess in that scene. I thought this was your costume but you actually picked that outfit? How did V not stop you?” Serena sounded stunned. 

“I just grabbed the first thing I saw.” N mumbled, now understanding why Blaze hadn’t told him to go to the costume trailer but told Mira to. He probably thought N was already in his costume. 

“I don’t think you were looking.” Serena said, shaking her head as she started applying foundation on him. 

“I wasn’t really thinking at all this morning.” N admitted with a sigh. 

“I was too tired.”

Serena sighed, “This has everything to do with Bat, doesn’t it?” She grumbled.

“Maybe.” N admitted, feeling his face heat up.

“Dude.” Serena didn’t have to say anymore to show how she thought the whole Bat thing was stupid. 

“Where’s Cyla?” He asked, wanting to distract her. 

“She’s running late. Which is good because Meg isn’t here yet either.” Serena said with a sigh.

“Why did they only hire two makeup artists for the main cast?” She said, probably thinking aloud. 

“Because there’s only four of us.” N offered. 

Serena snorted and bopped him slightly on the head. “Probably.” She agreed as the door opened. 

“I’m late but I’m here!” Cyla screamed, rushing through the door. She tossed her bag to the side and looked around.

“Where’s everyone else?”

“Not here.” Serena replied, not looking up.

“I can see that.” Cyla said, rolling her eyes. Her gaze flicked over to N and she did a double take.

“What the hell are you wearing?” 

“Costume. That I accidentally put on when I was getting dressed this morning.” N said with a shrug. Cyla shook her head and started unloading her bag. She looked over at Serena. 

“Uh. So I know they told us yesterday what scenes they’re filming but I forgot. Could you tell me because all I remember is that I have to do Meg’s makeup and that Emily wasn’t going to be here today. ” She asked awkwardly. 

Serena stopped blending in the foundation and stared in disbelief at Cyla.

“I really do not understand your brain sometimes. They’re filming the bathroom scene and the “They hate me. I hate them.” scene. I’m doing N’s and Mira’s makeup. You are right about doing Meg’s makeup but you also have to do the scar prosthetics on Mira.” Serena explained, sounding exasperated. 

Cyla nodded gratefully. 

“Thanks Rena! I don’t know where I'd be without you.” She said then paused. 

“Probably fired.” She concluded. 

Serena and N shared a look but didn’t say anything as Serena continued to work on his makeup. A silence lingered in the trailer as Cyla got her stuff ready for the day and Serena got started on expanding N’s eye bags. Both Serena and Cyla could do special effects makeup but Cyla was more well known for it as well as bold makeup looks which was why she had been hired since two of the main characters had bold looks. 

Suddenly, voices could be heard from outside the trailer. He perked up when he heard Mira and Meg. Unfortunately the voices included Bat’s. The door opened once more, bringing in the arrival of his co-stars and Bat. 

“Meg’s going first.” Mira announced, dragging Bat to the waiting couch(aptly named since it was where everyone sat while they waited their turn for makeup). 

“We’re still talking about song stuff.”

Cyla’s eyes widened upon seeing Bat, but quickly turned her attention to Meg who sat down in the makeup chair next to N. 

Unwittingly, N’s eyes wandered to Bat’s reflection in the mirror. They had a little notebook out and was scribbling down notes from whatever Mira was saying. They were so focused, something that N never seemed to do right unless he was acting. For years he had wondered how their writing process worked and now he was witnessing it. It made him weirdly kinda mad though. How effortlessly they could do that, like it was second nature. It was stupid and petty but that feeling was still there. 

“I’m really sorry to interrupt, but I’ve always wanted to ask a musician what their favorite type of music is. Bat, would you mind being that musician?” Cyla asked suddenly. Bat looked up from their notebook and for a split second through the mirror their eyes met N’s. They quickly looked over Cyla to avoid his gaze.

“I don’t have a favorite musician.” Bat said with a shrug. Meg and Serena both collectively gasped while Cyla’s eyes widened.

“How’s that possible?” She asked in disbelief.

Bat shrugged, completely unfazed.

“My parents are both huge music nerds and raised me to like every type of music or at least appreciate it to some level. I just find it really hard to pick just one musician.” They explained.

N paused. He had heard someone say that before. Where had he though? The only person he knew to be raised by huge music nerds was Uzi. And there was no way Bat was Uzi. Uzi was kind, cool, a bit snarky, and really really sweet. Bat was none of those things. They were rude, blunt, and really snarky. If Bat was Uzi, N would eat his pilots’ hat. And he really liked that hat so he really hoped they weren’t.

But…In the very unlikely event that Bat was Uzi, did that mean he was the Devil that Uzi had vented about the first time they texted? The person that he hated because of how hurtful they were towards Bat.

OH most definitely.

But Bat wasn’t Uzi. So he didn’t have to worry about it.

Right?

Notes for untitled song(specifically the one for the movie)

-mars genuinely struggles with the idea of people caring about them

-makes it especially hard with chris cause they’ve only gotten along recently

-due to this, even when they try to trust chris they cant

-they’re in a constant state of “we hate each other” with chris

-hence why the agreement if rwb is created between them

-but deep down mars does love chris

-which is what makes it worse when after they confess chris runs off

-try to make the lyrics convey someone just questioning themself and everything they thought

Possible lyrics

Now I stand in the bathroom

Staring in the mirror wondering desperately

If you ever really loved  me

Or just the idea of who I could be (no that doesnt work, mars doesnt know that chris loves them back)

Fuck, i hate break up songs.

By break time, Uzi had managed to successfully avoid Noah after they got out of the hair and makeup trailer. His scene was being filmed on a soundstage than the one she would be on, thank god. But she still felt emotionally exhausted.

Seeing Mira do the scene in the bathroom had been hard. It gave her flashbacks to when she was still cutting and she had to leave the soundstage for a bit. Mira did an incredible job though, the blank stare as they held the razor was what sent her out of the soundstage. IT just reminded her of the times she wore that same expression. It didn’t really help that they had her songs playing so that Mira could imagine how the scene would look edited. As the scene was filmed, Uzi could perfectly envision the days she wrote each song that played. 

Uzi shuddered, trying to shake the memories. She didn’t need them popping up. Not now, not ever. Besides, she wasn’t even outside anymore, she was back in the soundstage at the food table. It only had snacks but she sure as hell wasn’t going to ignore it. Her dad always taught her to horde food at a snack table.

Because you never know when you won’t be able to get food at all and all you’ll have is what you brought. Also it’s free, we may have money Zizi but never be afraid to enjoy the free luxuries in life. He’d say, before demonstrating how to hide a bag of chicken wings in a coat. Eying the snacks, Uzi quickly went over the ways to hide chips in a personal bag.

As she started grabbing bags of chips and shoving them into her bag, Noah walked up a few feet behind her. She couldn’t exactly see him but she knew it was him

 “What are you looking at?” Uzi said, turning around. Noah had his hands shoved into his sweatpants pockets.

“Nothing, just wondering why you’re hoarding snacks.” He said casually, like he caught people doing this all the time.

“Cuz it’s free.” Uzi said, with an eye roll. How was that not obvious? Maybe it was because he was rich and he didn’t understand the concept of complementary things. Then again, she had grown up wealthy too so maybe he was just being stupid.

“Well, do a better job at not being obvious.” Noah snarked.

Uzi scowled. “Why were you watching me anyway?” She demanded and was pleasantly surprised to see a blush come onto his cheeks. Well, well, well. Apparently he wasn’t exactly immune to her words.

“I-I was going to get a snack and you were here already. It’s kinda hard not to look at you.” He stumbled over his words.

“Dude, there’s the other half of the table.” Uzi said, pointing to the left of her. Noah just blushed harder, making her smirk.

“You were stealing!” Noah exclaimed, trying to spin back the argument.

“And you were staring.” She said in a singsong voice.

“Shut up.” Noah grumbled before starting to pick over the snacks.

Uzi felt remarkably pleased. Now he knew how she felt this morning. Good. They were even.

More possible lyrics

And as I stand here wondering

I hold a razor to my wrist

Hearing your voice say

“Please don’t cut”

Like you always did

I don’t know if you ever meant it

Why can't I stop writing too long lyrics?

Ugh. I thought talking to Mira about Mars would help me. And it has. But only if I was just writing a song for Mars. I need to see Chris and Mars’ interacting to see how they work. But the only way to do that is if I come back to set and spend MORE time around Noah.

Note to self, work on a list of solutions that do not lead me back to The Devil.

“They’re a great actor, aren’t they?”

Uzi jumped slightly at the random voice in her ear and slammed her notebook shut. She scowled when she saw that it was Noah. 

“Aren’t you supposed to be filming your own scene?” She hissed.

“Wrapped up early, so I’d thought I should come over and see how you guys are fairing over here.” Noah said with a shrug.

“Well it’s going just fine. And yes, Mira is an amazing actor. Especially in comparison to their co-star” Uzi said through clenched teeth. He rolled his eyes. His gaze went over to Mira, who was currently doing the last part of the bathroom scene.

Uzi sighed and clutched her notebook tighter. He didn’t seem to see what she had been writing before he showed up. It still made her anxious, her first drafts were almost the most embarrassing parts of the song. When she just wrote what came to mind and it just looked like gibberish.

“How’s writing going?” Noah asked suddenly. Uzi flinched.

“Fine. It’s a hard process but I’m getting ideas.” She said, unsure of what was happening. Was he trying to make peace with her or was he trying to get her to show him her notebook.

“Not surprised. You’ve always been a good writer.” He said, a smirk on his face.

“Are you making fun of me?” She asked, steeling her gaze so that he couldn’t decipher her expression.

“What? No, I mean it. You're genuinely a talented writer.” Noah insisted.

“Even if we don’t get along and I do think you could use a little more variety in your sound, I can admit that you are talented.”

Uzi looked away from him, embarrassed. “I don’t like you and I don’t watch your movies. Can’t really say the same for you.” She said.

Noah hummed. “You could always watch The Land Of Stories.” He suggested, though his tone was teasing.

“Bite me. That’s never going to happen.” Uzi said.

“Well then. Guess I’m going to be a one note actor in your eyes forever.” Noah said, but he didn’t seem mad. Just amused.

“Guess so. I’m assuming that I’ll remain a one trick pony with my music?” She said, smirking.

“That you will be but a talented one trick pony.” Noah confirmed, smiling back at her.

For a brief moment, Uzi was reminded of how she talked with N. Talking to Noah right now felt weirdly familiar. Like she was talking to N. But she wasn’t because as Noah had proven throughout the day, he wasn’t N. This was just a weird moment that her brain was overthinking.

Right?

Noah suddenly scowled and pulled his phone out of his pocket. 

“Sister’s here to pick me up. See you online?” He said. 

Uzi nodded. “I can’t wait until our next argument. I can bring up the snack table.” She said, grinning wickedly. 

Noah groaned. “Please don’t.” He asked, giving her puppy eyes. 

“Oh but I will.” Uzi said mischievously. Instead of starting another argument with her, Noah just laughed fondly. 

“I’m gonna have to find a good comeback then. See you around Bat.” Noah said, turning around and walking away. 

“See you around Noah.” Uzi said, sighing as she turned back to Mira. Unfortunately, writing was the last thing on her mind. 

He’s not N, he’s not N. HE IS NOT N. 

Chapter Text

Sat Jan 18 6:30 pm

Uzi- hey man

Uzi- howd it go?

N🐶- It was…Interesting.

N🐶- I barely slept the night before and was exhausted when I was getting dressed so I showed up looking sleep deprived and dressed like someone who doesn’t know fashion.

N🐶- After being on set for less than ten minutes, I end up running into The Vampire.

Uzi- like, metaphorically or literally

N🐶- Literally.

N🐶- And I started saying stuff I don’t typically say which made them get really flustered.

N🐶- It was like I was different person but it also felt good because it was like I was getting revenge on them for they way their music has affected me over the years.

Uzi- huh, that kinda makes sense

Uzi- anymore interactions with them after that?

N🐶- Just two. One that happened at the snack table, in that case the tables were turned on who got flustered. And the other happened at the end of the day. That one was the weirdest one, we actually had a normal conversation.

Uzi- mhm

Uzi- sounds like a day

N🐶- Enough about my day, how was yours?

Uzi- i dont really want to talk about it

Uzi- it was fine i guess

Uzi- i think i might have to go back because i only have enough material for a song about the character not a breakup song for the character

Uzi- i really dont want to do that so im looking for alternatives

Uzi- but it looks like coming back to set might be my only option

N🐶- I’m sorry! That sucks.

N🐶- Do you want me to look up facts about your favorite animal to distract you?

Uzi- sure

N🐶- Okay, but uh I don’t know your favorite animal.

Uzi- bats

N🐶- A specific type of bats, or just bats?

Uzi- just bats, all bats are cool

N🐶- Alrighty then! Bat facts coming your way!

A Bat, A Barbie, A Doll, A Football, and A Cowboy

Sat Jan 18 7:17 pm

Uzi- when he describes something that happened to you on the very same day

Uzi- especially after the other guys does something that reminds you of him

Uzi- im just overthinking this

Uzi- theres no way the cute dork in my phone who is currently looking up bat facts for me is the same person as noah elliot

Uzi- this is all just a coincidence

Knock off Barbie- not even gonna try w/ u

Doll stop changing your contact name- uzi use your brain challenge.

Cowboy- you’re just doing this on purpose at this point

Football- zi, you’re smarter than this

Uzi’s in her head again

Sat Jan 18 8:20 pm

Dolly💙- so we all agree, noah is caden/n?

Lizzy- yep

Idiot🏈- oh yeah

The Lone Ranger- yes

Dolly💙- what do we do about this?

Idiot🏈- sit her down and have a serious conversation about this?

Lizzy- hahebehdhehdhgeg

Lizzy- good joke thad

Idiot🏈- i was being serious 

Lizzy- oh

The Lone Ranger- don’t think she’s going to listen to that thad 

The Lone Ranger- sorry man

Idiot🏈- whatever, you guys are right anyway 

The Lone Ranger- maybe we could talk to someone on noah’s side?

Lizzy- wdym

The Lone Ranger- we can see if there’s a similar situation going on over there

The Lone Ranger- like noah’s in denial too

Dolly💙- wait. 

Dolly💙- beau, that’s actually a great idea.

Dolly💙- how would we talk to someone? we don’t know anyone on noah’s side. 

Lizzy- i have vs number

Dolly💙- why?

Lizzy- she commissioned me awhile ago

Lizzy- shes pretty cool

Dolly💙- uh huh.

The Lone Ranger- go text her then!

Lizzy- alr i will

Lizzy- wait

Lizzy- nm

Lizzy- she texted me js now

Lizzy- hold on let me see what shes saying

Sat Jan 18 7:29 pm

V- hey lizzy

V- weird question

V- is bats real name uzi

Lizzy- possibly

Lizzy- why

V- cuz n is falling for someone in his phone and their backstory sounds very similar to bats

Lizzy- omg

Lizzy- i was just abt 2 text u a similar question

Lizzy- but yes, bats real name is uzi

Lizzy- howd you figure it out

V- q&a that started their drama

V- uzi said that their stage name came from their favorite animal and their real name

V- yesterday i caught n looking up fun facts about bats and when asked why, he said that uzi’s(the person in his phone) favorite animal is bats

V- he likes to look up animal facts for people

V- anyway, due to my extensive knowledge of guns i clocked in immediately that their name is a gun

V- and since their favorite animal is a bat…

V- bat with a gun

Lizzy- holy shit

Lizzy- the fbi needs 2 hire u or smth 

V- ik, youre not the first person to tell me that

Lizzy- so uzis phone person is n

V- and ns phone crush is uzi 

Lizzy- now what

V- well we could try and set them up

Lizzy- how, uzis schedule is prob a lot different than ns

V- do they go hiking

Lizzy- sometimes, they do it on and off. right now its like once a week i believe

Lizzy- why

V- perfect

V- one of ns workouts is hiking

V- he goes out once a week

Lizzy- which trail

V- spire trail

Lizzy- thats uzis usual trail

Lizzy- they like 2 go 2 the top and write

Lizzy- says the height gives them inspiration

Lizzy- and they take their moms dog up there too, 2 get extra exercise

V- what type of dog is it?

Lizzy- kie is a golden retriever

V- oh yeah, its perfect

V- what day do they typically go hiking

Lizzy- mondays at like 1ish

V- wow the universe really wants them together

V- n has monday off so hes going hiking at 2ish

Lizzy- so zi will get there b4 him

Lizzy- perfect

V- amazing

Lizzy- we should set up a group chat with everyone

Lizzy- that way we can all keep up on updates

V- lets wait til monday and see how it goes

V- but that is a good idea

Sent on January 18th 2025 At 7:54 pm

To: Copper-9 Productions

From: Uzi Doorman

Dear Mr Utonium,

Thank you again for having me on set. It definitely gave me the perspective I needed to understand Mars’ character more. But I need to see the relationship between Chris and Mars in action to make the best song for this movie. If it is possible, I would like to return to set in order to understand the story better.

Best Regards,

Uzi Doorman

Chapter Text

Sent on January 19th 2025 at 9:30 am

To: Uzi Doorman

From: Copper-9 Productions

Dear Miss Doorman,

We would be delighted to host you on set again! Attached to the email, you will find a copy of the filming schedule.

Please tell us what days you would like to come back to set so we can send you a car to pick you up again. 

Best wishes,

Blaze Utonium

filmschedule.file

Sent on January 19th 2025 at 9:47 am

To: Copper-9 Productions 

From: Uzi Doorman

Dear Mr Utonium,

I can go to set from January 21st to January 27th. As for the car, I would be more than happy to take my own. I have the address to set so it won’t be that big of a deal. My one request, if possible, is that I would like a parking space. 

Thank you for agreeing to have me on set again. I am aware how jarring it can be to have an outsider watching you work on a project. So I’m very honored to be there. 

Best,

Uzi Doorman

Sent on January 19th 2025 at 10:07 am

To: Uzi Doorman

From: Copper-9 Productions 

Dear Miss Doorman,

The dates you picked work out perfectly and a parking spot will be provided for you. It will be labeled Bat With A Gun so you know where it is. 

Warmest Regards,

Blaze Utonium

Sun Jan 19 2:09 pm

Twin- are you going hiking alone again tomorrow 

N- No. 

N- Meg’s coming. 

Twin- oh

Sun Jan 19 2:14 pm

V- hey meg, howre you doing 

Meggy- hey v!

Meggy- i'm doing good 

Meggy- what’s up

V- i heard you were going hiking with n tomorrow 

Meggy- i am

V- i need you to skip on it

Meggy- what

V- cancel, say you doubled booked

Meggy- why

V- look its hard to explain 

V- can you just trust me when i say that this is important to ns love life

Meggy- this has to bat, doesn't it

V- howd you know

Meggy- the tension was thick on set yesterday 

Meggy- i'll go let him know i can't go

Meggy- you know, my mom does needs help cleaning out the garage 

V- thanks

Meggy- no problem 

Sun Jan 19 2:21 pm

Meggy Meg✨✨- hey n

Meggy Meg✨✨- my mom needs help cleaning out the garage tomorrow so i can’t got hiking 

Meggy Meg✨✨- im so sorry 

N- No problem Meg! I get it. 

N- Hope you get a bunch of stuff done!

Meggy Meg- thanks n, i will. i promise i’ll try to make it up to you

Uzi would be the first person to admit that some of her hobbies come from her parents. But she could say for certain that hiking was not one of them.

Hiking was her own thing. It was a way to get out of her own head and get lyrics out of her head and organized on paper. Plus it was a great way to bond with Kie since her parents adopted him after she moved out to cure their empty nest syndrome. Kie was a shelter dog who apparently LOVED hiking with his old owners. Since neither Nori nor Khan hiked, they asked Uzi to be the one to take him hiking. So Uzi agreed and now she had a little hiking buddy in the form of a golden retriever.

She’d also learned that Kie was a very good listener.

“And yeah, now I just don’t know what to do. If N is Noah does that mean I’m just an idiot who never realised? And if he does, does he even know that he’s been talking to me this entire time? Oh god, am I The Vampire? Ugh this is just so confusing!” Uzi complained as they trekked up the hill. They were halfway through the trail and she had spent most of her time venting about the situation to the dog. Kie whined in understanding. Or maybe he wanted her to throw the ball that he knew was in her bag.

“Not now Kie, we’re not at the top yet. If I throw the ball now, it will get lost. But seriously, does he know?” Uzi said tiredly. Kie didn’t answer, he pulled on his leash, wanting to be let loose.

“Oh no, I am not falling for that again. Last time I let you off the leash before we got to the top, you bolted after a “squirrel” which turned out to be a skunk.” She said.

Kie bowed his head in shame.

“Oh Kie, don’t be sad. We’ve all done something like that before. Like how I’ve possibly fallen for the most annoying person on the planet.” Uzi said, which made Kie nudge her with his nose in annoyance. 

“Bite me. I know it’s not a perfect analogy but it still works.” She said, looking up at the trees, their beauty making her go quiet for a bit.

Spire Trail was a long and uphill trail that always left Uzi tired yet refreshed when she was done. The trees grew in a way that created the perfect amount of shade. The dirt that led up the trail had the best consistency, not too muddy but not too dry. The plants that grew around the trail were wild but they didn’t cross over the trail too much. Best part was that very few people took the trail on the days she went so she could go out without a mask and just be Uzi instead of Bat for a bit. It was perfect.

“And the worst part about this whole thing is that the others think N might be Noah. Apparently they don’t need to talk to either guy to know this, my inchorrent ramblings are enough. When in reality, I’m probably just overthinking all of this!” She exclaimed suddenly. Kie gave her a look that seemed to be judging her.

“Don’t give me that look. You haven’t even met the guy nor do you know how we interact outside of mom and dad laughing about the internet drama.” Uzi argued. Kie barked lazily back at her.

“Sorry Kie, I spent most of the hike complaining about this. I’m just trying to sort my thoughts out before I go back to set tomorrow. Did I tell you about that?” She asked. Kie wagged his tail which Uzi assumed meant,

“Yes you have, now could you please stop talking and get us to the top faster so that you can write and I can play catch.”

“There’s just been a lot on my mind. I think we’re almost there.” Uzi promised. She stopped to take out her phone and speaker.

“Want some music?”

As much as N liked Meg’s company, he was kinda happy she couldn’t come.

He needed to be alone after the email he got from Blaze yesterday. Bat was coming back to set. Not just for one day, no. They were coming back to set for six days. Did the universe hate him or something? Even though they had one normal conversation on Saturday, he didn’t know how to feel about them. And then there was the issue that Bat might possibly be Uzi. He still didn’t have a lot of evidence to back it but he couldn’t help but wonder.

N inhaled the fresh air around him. The earthy smells calmed him down slightly. It was going to be okay. He and Bat had fought too badly. It was just tiny bickerments, nothing huge.No one attacked anyone or anything like that. It was fine, he was fine, they were fine. In more ways than one. N blinked in surprise at the intrusive thought before quickly shaking it off. These were not thoughts he was meant to be having.

He just needed to get to the top and see the view so he could feel better about everything, even just for a little bit. And then go home and watch crappy reality tv with Cyn on the couch. He was almost there, he only had one more turn…

“All my friends are happy and healthy and well-adjusted

So when Chris took shots of vodka, he looked disgusted (oh, he looked)

And that's why Blake's at UPS and Logan busses, oh

Oh, all my friends are happy and healthy and well-adjusted”

N froze. Someone was at the top. No one but N ever really seemed to take Spire Trail so who was up there and why were they playing Bat’s covers? Oh well he would see in a few minutes. He started walking again then stopped when he realized that Bat did NOT have a cover of ‘Happy, Healthy, Well-Adjusted’ and that it sounded more like someone was singing rather than listening to music.

Oh no.

No.

There was no way. He was probably just imagining things.

But as he got closer and closer to the top, there was no denying that Bat was up there. And when he got to the top, there they were with a dog. OH MY GOD THEY WERE WITH A DOG! Bat’s back was turned to him as they sat on one of the picnic tables, throwing a ball for a golden retriever to catch. 

The dog noticed him first. After catching the ball, the dog saw him and trotted over to where N stood. 

“Kie, what are you doing b…” Bat trailed off as they turned towards him. Kie, seemingly unbothered, dropped the ball in front of him. 

“Oh. It’s you.” Bat said flatly, a frown on their face.

N’s eyes widened when he realized that Bat didn’t have a face mask on or any type of mask on. He was looking at their face. Since he was sixteen he wondered what Bat’s face looked like but respected that they didn’t want people to know. Now as he stared at them, only four words were on his mind. Bat was really pretty.

“It’s me.” He confirmed, deciding to play it cool(even though he felt anything but) and picked up the ball from where Kie had dropped it in front of him. He waved the ball side to side, getting Kie excited before he threw it. 

Kie barked happily and chased after the ball. 

“You didn’t have to do that.” Bat grumbled. 

“He would have gotten bored of you not throwing it and brought it back to me.”

N shrugged then walked over to the picnic table and sat down. 

“It’s fine, I love dogs.” He said. Bat said nothing and started crossing something out in their notebook. 

Kie came back with the ball and sat down at their feet, panting wildly. 

“Here Kie, let me get you some water.” Bat murmured, eyeing N wearily as they put down their notebook. Their silent message was clear: Do not touch the notebook. N flattened his hands against his lap as they pulled out a small bag from under the table. They took out a water bottle and a little bowl before pouring it and giving it to the dog. 

The silence was killing N. 

“So do you come here often?” N asked awkwardly. Bat stared at him for a few seconds before shrugging. 

“When I get the chance.” They said simply. 

“Not a lot of people come up here.” N babbled. 

“I think this is the first time I’ve seen someone actually sitting at the top before me.”

“Uh huh.” Bat said, looking like they wanted to smack him. 

“I guess that’s why you’re not wearing a mask.” The words were out his mouth before he could even think about it. Regret immediately washed over him as Bat’s icy calm expression melted into a stunned look. 

“When you leave, forget you saw my face. Got it?” They hissed.

“Sorry, I wasn’t thinking. I just don’t know how to talk to you and I’m seeing your face for the first time and you’re really pre-” Bat cut him off. 

“I’m going to stop you right there. Please shut up.” They said, scowling. N nodded wildly and mouthed “Sorry” one more time for good measure. Bat just rolled their eyes and bent back down to grab their bag again. This time they pulled out a bag of jalapeno kettle chips and started snacking on them.

“Did you take those from the snack table?” He asked. Bat snorted.

“Maybe. Whatcha gonna do about it?” They said mockingly, grabbing a handful of chips and shoving them in their mouth.

N pretended to be deep in thought as he tapped his chin. “Report you to Blaze.” N said.

“Nah, Blaze likes me too much.” Bat said with a shrug.

“Enough to let you come on set for six days.” N pointed out. Bat glared at him.

“Bite me. I do what I want.” They snapped, balling up the chip bag.

N leaned back on the table. “Second time you’ve said that to me.” He said, making them blush.

“What are you talking about?” Bat demanded.

“You’ve tweeted that at me before.” He said with a shrug.

“You remember that?” They said, their voice stunned.

“I remember the interactions where I made you mad.” N teased.

“Oh fuck you!” Bat snapped, putting Kie on alert.

“What? I can’t help it that I know my mere existence makes you mad.” And there was that weird side of himself coming out again. He smiled when he saw their face turn bright red.

“It does not!” They shouted, crossing their arms.

“You shouting that really proves your point.” N said, smirking. Bat glared at him, looking like they were trying to decide how to hit him and run. Suddenly they closed their eyes and sighed.

“How are we gonna make it through six days of this?” They groaned.

“Easy, you just avoid me the way you did last time during filming and hang out with Mira the entire time.” N said, confused.

“No, Noah. I’m coming back to set so I can see how Mars and Chris work together as a couple. I have to be around you and Mira the entire day.” Bat said, reaching down and petting Kie.

“Oh.” N said, feeling really dumb.

“We could make an agreement?”

“An agreement?” Bat sounded dubious.

“Yes.” N confirmed.

“What would we even put on it?” They asked, sitting up.

“We will not argue unless it’s online and if we absolutely have to, we will take it outside?” N suggested.

“That is probably the dumbest thing on the planet but it just might work. Shake on it?” Bat said, putting their hand out. N grabbed it and shook it, a burst of tingles shot through his arm as he did it. Which caused him to pull away. He immediately regretted it and wanted to feel their hand in his again.

Bat pulled back and checked their watch.

“Shit I have to go. My parents are going to want Kie back.” They said, hopping off the picnic table and grabbing their notebook.

“He’s not your dog?” N asked, surprised.

“He’s my parents’ dog. They got him to cure empty nest syndrome. It worked.” Bat said, putting away the water bowl and the ball in their bag before they pulled out a leash. Kie looked sad when Bat attached the leash to his harness but still got up.

“That’s cool. See ya, Bat.” He said as they started to walk away.

“Bye Noah.” Bat said and Kie barked what N assumed was a goodbye.

As he watched Bat walk away, he couldn’t help but think that maybe his theory about Bat being Uzi was wrong. He still wasn’t sure but if someone made him choose, he would say that Bat was not Uzi. The two of them both having music nerds for parents was just a coincidence.

At least until he found more evidence to prove otherwise, but it was extremely unlikely that Uzi was The Vampire.

Bat With A Gun @ bw/ag

youre still annoying btw

1/20/25 5:43 pm

Noah Elliot @ therealnoahelliot

Same goes for you.

1/20/25 5:56 pm

Chapter Text

Mon Jan 20 7:21 pm

V- make a group chat?

Lizzy- do u wanna do it or should i

V- could you set it up and i can add my people

Lizzy- on it

Mon Jan 20 7:27 pm

Moya Vselennaya added you, Thad, Beau, and an unknown number to a group chat

Unknown Number added three unknown numbers to a group chat

Moya Vselennaya- v did u add every1

Unknown number 1- yes

Moya Vselennaya- good

Moya Vselennaya- hello, ur prob wondering why v and i made this

Possibly V- it has come to our attention that bat with a gun and noah have been texting

Moya Vselennaya- but it started as a wrong # so neither of them have any clue(or are in denial at this point its both)

Possibly V- so we created this group chat to give them a little push

Moya Vselennaya- also 2 place bets

Possibly V- yes that too

Moya Vselennaya- pls introduce urself and state who ur connected 2

Moya Vselennaya- ill go 1st. im lizzy, bats childhood best friend

Possibly V- im v, im noahs twin sister

Doll- lizzy what the hell is this?

Moya Vselennaya- read above dolly

Doll- i did. 

Moya Vselennaya- oh good, now tell every1 who u are and who ur connected 2

Doll- no.

Moya Vselennaya- dolly please

Doll- fine.

Doll- my name is doll, which you either know or you probably guessed it from lizzy. i am bat’s cousin. specifically the one that designed their logo. 

Moya Vselennaya- thx dolly!

Moya Vselennaya- cmon ppl, i know ur here

Possibly V- follow dolls lead people

Doll- don’t make me a leader in this.

Possibly V- i do what i want

Moya Vselennaya- break it up u 2

Thad- uh hi, i have no idea what i just came in on

Thad- but i’m thad, one of bat’s childhood best friends 

Unknown number 3- V what did I say about giving out my number?

Possibly V- not to do it

Possibly V- but since when have i ever listened to you

Possibly V- now say who you are

Unknown number 3- Ugh fine, don’t say I never do anything for you.

Unknown number 3- I’m Jay, as in Jayden Elliot. I’m also Noah’s older sister.

Possibly Jayden Elliot- V, text me when we’re making bets. I don’t have time for this.

Possibly V- yeah yeah

Moya Vselennaya- beau i know ur on ur phone i can see u

Doll- beau text this group chat.

Thad- c’mon beau, it’ll be fun

Beau- somehow i kinda doubt that

Beau- but eh, i’ve got nothing better to do

Beau- i’m beau, which you probably know by now

Beau- bat’s cousin 

Moya Vselennaya- ok, thats every1 on my end

Possibly V- cyn, tessa. i know youre reading this

Possibly V- esp you cyn, you love this sort of thing

Unknown number 2- *sighs* i hate how well you know me, big sister v

Unknown number 2- i am cyn, big brother noah’s youngest sister

Possibly Cyn- when are we making bets?

Possibly V- after tessa finally texts back and we come up with a bare bones plan

Doll- or we could start betting now.

Possibly Cyn- yes let’s do that

Beau- sounds great!

Thad- we could wait you guys

Moya Vselennaya- thx thad, 4 being the only patient person here

Doll- lizzy, this has no real point. what would we even come up with?

Moya Vselennaya- ull see dolly

Doll- ugh.

Unknown number 4- Oh my goodness, what is going on

Unknown number 4- Wait, never mind, I read up

Unknown number 4- Hi I’m Tessa! N’s oldest sister

Possibly V- great now were all introduced

Moya Vselennaya- so lets start with what we know

Moya Vselennaya- 4 the next 6 days n and bat will be in close proximity 2 each other

Possibly V- both of them are allowed to have friends and family on set

Possibly V- which is where we come in

Thad- meaning we go on set and give them a nudge?

Possibly V- yes exactly!

Possibly V- i like this guy

Thad- thanks

Beau- but how do we ask to go onset with them without raising suspicion

Possibly Cyn- we shouldn’t have a problem, big brother loves it when we go on set with him

Doll- bat’s going to clock us immediately if we ask.

Moya Vselennaya- maybe if it was u and beau

Moya Vselennaya- but not if it was me and thad

Doll- what.

Thad- what?

Beau- huh

Possibly Tessa- I’m very confused on what’s happening right now

Possibly V- scheming is happening, ill explain it in person later

Possibly Cyn- for now big sister tessa, it might be easier if you waited with big sister jay for when we start betting

Possibly Tessa- Hm okay, but I will be reading the texts

Moya Vselennaya- doll, u and beau would come on set 2

Moya Vselennaya- but u wouldnt be the 1 to bring it up

Moya Vselennaya- it would be me and thad cuz were stubborn like that

Thad- that barely makes sense

Moya Vselennaya- just follow my lead when we do it

Moya Vselennaya- at the end of the day every1 will be on set damn it

Possibly Cyn- but how do we get them closer together

Doll- don’t know. fear possibly.

Beau- that won’t work, barely anything scares bat

Doll- they’re easy to startle.

Thad- we could startle them while they’re talking to noah 

Moya Vselennaya- ooo yes! maybe theyll jump into his arms or something

Possibly V- okay thats one idea on the back burner

Possibly Cyn- can we start betting now

Doll- i say yes, since we have an idea now.

Moya Vselennaya- idk i feel like we should make more

Doll- get back to me in a few hours when my mind is not focused on making bets.

Moya Vselennaya- ur no fun

Doll- that’s not what you were saying last night.

Thad- and i’m gonna stop this right here

Thad- are we betting on reveals, officially going out, or both 

Possibly V- i wanna go with both 

Moya Vselennaya- ooo yes, more ways 2 make money!

Doll- both works.

Beau- meh idrc

Possibly Cyn- both, definitely both

Possibly Jayden Elliot- Both means there’s more than one chance to win. Of course I’m going with that.

Possibly Tessa- I’m fine with whatever

Moya Vselennaya- so both it is

Moya Vselennaya- ill go first

Moya Vselennaya- $20 theyll reveal who they really are a week after being on set and $35 that they start dating seconds after the reveal

Doll- you have way too much faith in them, my love.

Moya Vselennaya- i know what im doing 

Possibly V- if she loses that means more money for us

Possibly V- any way, $25 that theyll realize it on the 3rd day of being on set together and $20 that they start dating a month after the reveal

Possibly Cyn- who’s taking notes

Moya Vselennaya- thad is

Thad- i am

Doll- he is usually the one who takes notes when we make bets. 

Possibly Tessa- How often do you take bets

Beau- about once a month

Beau- it’s cheaper than this tho

Possibly Jayden Elliot- Enough talking, more betting. 

Possibly V- why dont you go next then

Possibly Jayden Elliot- Fine, I will. 

Possibly Jayden Elliot- $100 for both of them. The reveal will happen on Bat’s final day on set. They’ll start dating about two weeks after that.

Possibly Tessa- That’s a lot of money Jay 

Possibly Jayden Elliot- I have money to spend. Whoever wants to go next can go. I’m done. 

Beau- ill go i guess 

Beau- keeping it simple with $10 for both. reveal will happen second day on set and they’ll start dating two months after the reveal 

Possibly Cyn- put me down for double the amount of money as beau and push up whatever number he said for each thing by two

Thad- i somewhat understand that

Thad- but to make it clear: you’re putting down $20 for both, reveal will happen on the fourth day of bat being on set and it’ll take them four months  to start dating after the reveal

Possibly Cyn- yes

Thad- okay then

Doll- i’ll go now. 

Doll- $30 the reveal happens three months after bat is on set and $40 they start dating a year after that. 

Possibly V- thats way too spread out

Doll- i know how my cousin is, this could take years. 

Possibly Tessa- Oh dear

Thad- tessa how much do you want to put down

Possibly Tessa- Hmmm

Possibly Tessa- I think I’ll put down $30 for the reveal to happen on the second day of Bat being on set and $25 on them getting together about five weeks after the reveal

Thad- alright! i put myself down for $40 on both of them with the reveal happening two weeks after bat’s on set and they’ll start dating five months after 

Thad- and i just realized that the group chat doesn’t have a name

Thad- let me fix that

Thad named the group chat to The Schemers

Thad- what do we think 

Possibly Cyn- it’s okay, could be a bit better

Possibly Tessa- Oh let me try!

Possibly Tessa renamed the group chat to The Betting Schemers

Possibly Tessa- Actually I don’t like this one

Moya Vselennaya- any other ideas

Possibly Jayden Elliot- I got this. 

Possibly Jayden Elliot renamed the group chat to Assistants to the Braincell Challenged

Possibly Jayden Elliot- Done. 

Possibly V- yep thats the one

Moya Vselennaya- its perfect 

Beau- couldn’t have said it better myself 

Thad- yeah that’s way better than mine

Possibly Tessa- It’s a little mean but that’s okay

Possibly Cyn- *giggles* *claps hands* incredible 

Doll- truer words have never been said. 

Mon Jan 20 7:30 pm

Uzi- okay so

Uzi- thank you again for listening to me the other day and sending bat facts to distract me

Uzi- i wanted to thank you by texting you some fun facts about dogs but i dont think anything i tell you is going to be new to you

Uzi- so do you wanna hear some dog jokes instead?

N🐶- YES!!!!

Uzi- great, here we go

Uzi- whats a dogs favorite form of transportation

N🐶- I don’t know.

Uzi- a waggin

N🐶- Aw that’s cute!

Uzi- why do dogs run in circles

N🐶- Oh I know this one!

Uzi- wanna answer it

N🐶- Yes please!

N🐶- Because it’s really hard to run in squares!

Uzi- whats the most popular dog breed among magicians?

N🐶- Hmm, this is a tough one.

Uzi- the labracadabador

N🐶- That’s a really creative pun! I’m definitely saving that one!

Uzi- whats a dogs favorite position to play in football

N🐶- I think I know the answer but I don’t want to say…

Uzi- a golden receiver

Uzi- picked that one special for you cause i know theyre your favorite

N🐶- Awww, Uzi that’s so nice of you.

Uzi- i didnt really get this one but you might

Uzi- what breed of dog will unlock your door

Uzi- a yorkie

N🐶- Yeah I don’t get that one either.

Uzi- thats okay, lets see if you know this one

Uzi- i went to the zoo once. there was only one dog in it. it was a shihtzu

N🐶- Ooo, clever pun work!

Uzi- yeah i thought so too

Uzi- i named my dog wifi cause i stole it from my neighbor

N🐶- That actually reminds me of a funny story.

Uzi- what is it

N🐶- The people who live in the house next door to me and my sisters stole our password once.

N🐶- My twin sister got really mad and after we changed the password she took everything that wasn’t nailed down off their lawn until they apologized.

Uzi- youre kidding

N🐶- I wish I was. When they wouldn’t apologize, she threatened to sell their stuff to a pawn shop.

Uzi- did they

N🐶- Yep, it was interesting couple weeks.

Uzi- your sister is my hero

Uzi- that is so fucking petty, i love it

N🐶- Yeah, she can be really petty while being super creative about it.

N🐶- What else you got?

Uzi- heres a pun

Uzi- how does a dog stop a tv show

Uzi- he presses paws

N🐶- That shouldn’t have made me smile as much as it did.

Uzi- cheesy jokes will do that to ya

Uzi- its why theyre fun

Uzi- ive named my dog ten miles so that i can say i walk ten miles every day

N🐶- That’s gonna be the name I keep in the back of my mind when I adopt a dog one day.

N🐶- Just in case I can’t think of a name.

Uzi- honestly same

Uzi- my mom made that joke, when she and my dad got their dog

N🐶- Your parents have a dog?

Uzi- yep, got him beat empty nest syndrome

Uzi- it worked a little too well, sometimes i think they love him more than me

N🐶- Deja vu.

Uzi- huh

N🐶- Sorry, what you said reminded me of something.

Uzi- oh okay

Uzi- any way, hows your night going

N🐶- It’s going okay, I’m kind of just lounging around, talking to the coolest person on the planet.

N🐶- How about you?

Uzi- also lounging around but im talking to second coolest person on the planet in between crossing out lyrics

N🐶- Song still kicking you in the butt?

Uzi- yup

N🐶- Wanna talk about it?

Uzi- no, i really dont want to talk about work things rn

N🐶- Okay, have you written any fun songs lately?

Uzi- a few bits and pieces here and there

Uzi- ugh what are they yelling about now

N🐶- What’s wrong?

Uzi- my roommates just started yelling about getting on a group chat or smth

Uzi- idk it didnt make sense

N🐶- Weird.

Uzi- definitely

N🐶- Sorry to change the subject but I just realized something and now I have a question.

Uzi- ask away

N🐶- Would you be okay with calling me one day?

N🐶- Because we’ve never done it before and we don’t have to face time.

N🐶- You can say no obviously.

N🐶- But I would love to hear your voice.

Uzi- oh god

Uzi- tbh ive never really thought about it before

Uzi- the best i can say right now is maybe

Uzi- i would love to hear your voice too but i dont think im ready yet

Uzi- this would hypothetically be an audio call, right?

N🐶- Yes, obviously!

Uzi- okay then

Uzi- ask me again in a few days, once ive thought it out more

N🐶- I’ll wait forever until you’re comfortable.

Uzi- ugh, so cheesy

Uzi- but, thank you n

N🐶- Of course Uzi.

Uzi- 💜

N🐶- 💛

Chapter Text

Fandom: RPF

Rating: Explicit

Relationship:  Noah Elliot/Bat With A Gun

Characters: Noah Elliot, Bat With A Gun, Cynthia Elliot, Tessa Elliot, Vivian Elliot, Jayden Elliot, Lizzy Nikolopulous, Thad Nikolopulous, Cowboy(Bat’s Cousin), Bat’s Female Cousin

Tags: Non-binary Bat, Enemies To Lovers, Smut, Fluff, Angst, Noah fell first but Bat fell harder, it gets worse before it gets better, Enemies With Benefits, Idiots In Love, They also hate each other occasionally, College AU

Published: 2024-8-10      Updated: 2025-1-15    Words: 65,567     Chapters: 14/?    Comments: 543    Kudos: 423     Bookmarks: 47    Hits: 10,785

good thing we don’t like each other(yeah good thing)

starsinureyes

Summary- They had done this dance multiple times. Argue about something stupid, fuck, sleep, one of them leaves first, repeat. It’s routine at this point. It’s a good thing they don’t like each other, with anyone else this would be hell.

Notes:

So this is out of my comfort zone. I don’t typically write rpf but noahbat has infested my mind for years since the timeline Howisthismylife on tumblr made a few years back. And with the last few interactions noahbat have had I couldn’t help myself and this was made. Please excuse the shortness, lack of smut, and the unclarity of the first chapter.  I promise it’ll get longer, smuttier and clearer as we go on. Please enjoy!

Chapter 1)

Bat blinked wearily out the haze of sleep, the yellow of Noah’s walls blinding them slightly in the process. They had told him not to get the walls painted yellow but he had rolled his eyes and said they were being over dramatic and that no one was going to care what color he painted his stupid walls. 

Bat cared, but he didn’t need to know that.

They tried to roll over, to save themself from further blindness. But to their horror, they found they couldn’t. Noah had wrapped himself around them. Bat tried to carefully pry his hands off their waist but fuck, did this man have an iron grip. Which they knew, Bat had bruises on their thighs and arms from nights when Noah gripped way too tightly. Not that they were complaining. That grip was perfect, no notes. Except when he held them like this because when he did,  he wouldn’t let go of them.

The only good part was that Noah slept like the dead so he never woke up when they ripped his hands off of them.

This time though, as they broke free from his grasp, Noah let out a little whine and reached out from them when they rolled away. Bat winced, waiting for him to wake up. When he didn’t they grabbed a pillow they had tossed to the floor last night and gently placed it in Noah’s waiting arms. Noah’s face relaxed in his sleep and he brought the pillow closer to him. He kissed it before propping his chin atop of it.

An outsider would probably think this to be a gesture done by someone who was half asleep and didn’t want their partner to leave. But it wasn’t that and would never be that. Because Bat and Noah didn’t like each other. They hated each other. The arrangement they had was just an arrangement. It was probably the only reason why they hadn’t killed each at this point.

At least that was how Bat felt, they didn’t know how Noah felt.

With a sigh, Bat stood up from the bed and grabbed their clothes from off the floor. They quickly got changed and then slipped into Noah’s bathroom to brush their teeth. They scowled when they saw themself in the mirror. Their purple hair was a mess, their eye bags had gotten worse, and somehow, even though Bat told him to be gentler or do it in a different place, Noah had riddled their neck with hickies. He was lucky his mouth was so good, otherwise they’d duck tape it shut. 

“Fucking dick.” Bat muttered, grabbing the toothbrush Noah always left out for them when they stayed the night. Which was often. Listlessly, they brushed their teeth and sighed when they saw that Noah had left their phone in the bathroom for them to grab when they left. Spitting out toothpaste, they grabbed their phone and went through their contacts to call Thad. He picked up on the first ring.

“Hey Bat.” He said, sounding cheerful. In the background, they could hear the sounds of the kitchen. He must have been cooking.

“Hey Thad. You making breakfast?” Bat asked, hopping up on the bathroom counter. They opened the door just a crack to see if Noah was still asleep. He was. 

“Yep, working on a Dutch baby right now. Anyway, what’s up?” Thad asked. Bat imagined him sitting down in the little corner of the kitchen where they put a table and chair. 

“I’m at Noah’s and I walked to campus yesterday. Can you or someone else come pick me up?” They asked, feeling pathetic. 

“Yeah, hold on.” There was a clatter as Thad presumably tossed his phone down somewhere. 

His voice sounded distant as he shouted for Lizzy. Bat smiled when they heard a faint disgruntled “what” in response. There were some muffled noises, with Bat making out “drive them back” and “Only one who knows… a Dutch baby” before Lizzy’s voice finally picked up clearly through the phone. 

“Tell them I’ll be there in ten! Just let me put on my robe!” Lizzy shouted as Thad snorted. 

“Pretty sure she woke up the whole apartment with that yelling. Anyway, you heard her right?” He asked. 

“Yep, tell her I’ll be outside. Thanks Thad.” Bat said, hopping off the counter. 

“No problem Bat. See you in a bit.” Thad said. 

“See you in a bit.” Bat agreed before hanging up and shoving their phone in their pants pocket.  

They glanced at themself in the mirror one last time, to make sure they weren’t too much of a disaster. They looked decent enough, hair was a mess but they weren’t gonna touch Noah’s brush. And the hickies were still there but Bat was pretty sure that they had a jacket somewhere in Noah’s living room where they had tossed off amidst another one of their arguments. Deciding they looked good, they swung open the bathroom door and walked out of it. 

Noah was still asleep as they walked out of his room, still cuddling that stupid pillow. They tried not to think about the implications of it for too long as they threw on their jacket and grabbed their bag. A cycle they had done many times be-

“Bitch, get off your phone and eat your breakfast.”

Uzi squawked in surprise when her phone was snatched out of her hands. Lizzy shoved a plate of eggs, toast, and fruit towards her along with a cup of coffee. She then shoved the phone into some unknown nook in the kitchen. Thankfully she didn’t seem to see what Uzi had been looking at. That didn’t mean Uzi didn’t have the right to be annoyed though.

“What was that for?” Uzi demanded, grabbing a piece of toast and taking a bite.

“I said your name five times and you weren’t listening. Drastic measures had to be taken.” Lizzy said with a shrug, fixing up her own breakfast plate. Uzi rolled her eyes and started eating her eggs. 

Something was off. She didn’t have an exact reasoning why, she just felt it from the moment she woke up this morning. Lizzy was acting too energetic. Lizzy, despite being able to wake up early in the morning pretty easily, always was more subdued in the morning than she was in the afternoon. On the days it was her turn to cook breakfast, she worked slowly and silently in the kitchen, mostly speaking when she was spoken to until she had some source of caffeine. 

But this morning, Lizzy had been talking nonstop and rushing around the kitchen like her life depended on it. It weirded Uzi out so much that she decided to read on her phone for a bit. Lizzy thankfully took no offense to it, probably sensing Uzi’s unease. And while she had stopped talking once Uzi pulled out her phone, Lizzy had not stopped moving. 

So yeah, something was off.

“Okay that’s it.” Uzi said, putting her fork down as Lizzy sat down at the spot across from her.

“Why are you acting so weird?”

To her credit, Lizzy looked surprised. “I’m not acting weird, what are you talking about?” She asked, but her eyes were trained to her coffee cup.

“You’re not acting like your typical morning self. There’s something wrong, spill it.” Uzi demanded, giving Lizzy her most squirm worthy glare. 

“Fine, you caught me. You’re allowed to bring people on set right?” Lizzy said, something Uzi wasn’t expecting.

“Uh yes. I think so anyway.” She said, shuffling in her seat as she cautiously took a sip of her coffee. How had the tables turned in a matter of seconds?

“Well, the others and I were wondering if you would be willing to let us come on set with you at some point.” Lizzy said, her tone almost pleading. Okay it was official. Lizzy was plotting something with the others. Lizzy Nikolopulous was a lot of things but she never was someone who pleaded.

“Why do you guys wanna go so bad?” Uzi said, raising an eyebrow. 

“I want to see the costumes and see if they compare to what I make. Thad wants to see behind the scenes of a real movie set, which you know has been his dream for like ever. Beau wants to talk to the director or someone like that about editing. And Doll wants to see how much character the set design has. Judging set design is one of her favorite past times, you know.” Lizzy explained. Uzi was impressed, Lizzy clearly had thought this out thoroughly and there was some truth to what she was saying. Maybe having her friends on set would be good for her. Especially since she was gonna have to work so closely with Noah now.

“I’ll talk to Blaze and see if you guys can come with me tomorrow.” Uzi said finally. Lizzy practically lit up at the news.

“Really? You’ll do that?” She asked excitedly.

“Yeah, he might make it be another day but I’m sure you’ll be able to come at some point.” Uzi said, hoping it didn’t sound too much like a promise.

“Yay! Also Zi, you’re probably gonna want to eat faster. Aren’t you supposed to be on set soon?” Lizzy asked, making Uzi check the wall clock. To her horror, Lizzy was right. 

“Shit. Liz, can I have my phone back?” She asked as she started shoveling food in her mouth.

“You’ll get it back when you finish eating.”

Assistants to the Braincell Challenged

Tue Jan 21 8:26 am

Lizzy- ok

Lizzy- just talked 2 bat

Lizzy- they agreed 2 ask blaze if we could come on set tmr

Lizzy- will keep u guys updated

Queen V🔫- cool

Queen V🔫- just tell us the day youre allowed on set and well be there

Cynnamon Roll- blaze won’t mind if we show up randomly

Tessa(contact name TBD)- He likes all of us a lot

Tessa(contact name TBD)- He and his partner never had kids(personal choice) so he treats all of us like his nieces and nephew

Idiot🏈- you guys seem to know him really well

Queen V🔫- blaze has worked with noah on a bunch of stuff

Queen V🔫- hes been the director for like half of the movies noahs been in

Queen V🔫- so weve gotten to know him pretty well over the past few years

Tessa(contact name TBD)- He’s actually the only director Jay’s ever liked

Girlboss- He’s the only director N’s ever had that’s never tried to stifle his creativity in some way. He lets N do what he thinks is best for the character, which always proves to be the best choice.

Girlboss- His partner also brought me a freshly baked red velvet cake when I went to set on my birthday a few years ago, so obviously they got brownie points for that. 

Cynnamon Roll- python is the best

Tessa(contact name TBD)- But yes, Blaze knows us really well

Lizzy- damn now i want cake

Lizzy- note 2 self, go 2 a bakery later w/doll

Dolly💙- what are you signing us up for?

Lizzy- nothing

Lizzy- just plotting when we will be going 2 set

Dolly💙- hm. okay.

The Lone Ranger- no idea what is happening but i’m in

Lizzy- good

When N got back from the costume trailer, he couldn’t remember if Blaze told him to go to the hair and makeup trailer after or come back to set. So he went back to set to ask, only to be met with the sight of Bat talking to Blaze.

“Really tomorrow works?!” Bat’s eyes were shining as they spoke, like whatever Blaze had told them was the best news ever. He wished they always shined like that, especially at him.

“Of course! My partner and my friends come to the sets of my movies all the time. It’d be hypocritical of me to tell you no. Bring them whenever you’d like, Bat.” Blaze said jovially before turning to N.

“Ah Noah! Perfect timing. I need you to head over to the hair makeup trailer with Bat. Answer whatever questions they have.” Blaze said, patting N on the back. Bat stiffened, like they forgot he would be on set.

“Got it Blaze. Shall we?” To be extra cheeky, N held his arm out for Bat to loop theirs through. He knew they wouldn’t loop their arm through. Or he at least thought they wouldn’t until Bat scowled at his arm before grabbing his arm.

“We shall.” Bat said with a voice full of defiance.

Blaze looked between the two of them like they were an exhibit in the zoo. Then he shrugged, seemingly appeased. N tugged Bat away from Blaze and led them out of the soundstage. 

“Sooo, what were you talking to Blaze about?” He asked, trying to sound casual. Bat gave him an unimpressed look. 

“I was trying to see if he’d let me have my friends on set tomorrow.” They said, letting go of his arm. Immediately N missed the contact.

“So no partner?” N truly wasn’t thinking as he spoke because why the heck would he ask something like that?

“No. I’m single.” Bat said, looking away from him. The rest of the walk was spent in silence until they got to the door of the hair and makeup trailer. Bat stopped suddenly and reached into their bag, they pulled out their notebook and a pencil.

“So I asked Mira questions about Mars and what Mars thinks of their relationship with Chris. I’m basically going to do the same with you, think you can handle it?” They said, almost teasingly.

N nodded. “Yeah I can handle it. Hit me.” He said boldly as he opened the door to the trailer. Stepping inside, he saw that Serena was doing Emily’s makeup while Cyla’s was doing Meg’s. Mira was sitting quietly in a spare makeup chair which left the waiting couch wide open. Odd. Next to him, Bat let out a noise of confusion.

Mira looked up and smiled. “Hey you two. Blaze told us you guys were probably going to be busy with questions and what not, so I thought it would be a good idea to leave the waiting couch open for the two of you.” They explained, answering the unspoken question.

“Oh gee Mira, you shouldn’t have.” N said, glancing wearily at the couch.

“It’s perfect.” Bat said decisively, marching over to it. N shook his head tiredly and shut the door behind him before joining Bat on the couch.

Bat was already flipping through the pages of their notebook to find an empty one. They stopped once he sat down.

“What would you say Chris’s major flaw is?” They asked, not even looking at him. N hummed, deep in thought. This was an interesting question, one that he himself had thought of on more than one occasion.

“His lack of communication. Something I’ve noticed throughout the script and filming is that a lot of the problems that directly have to do with him, are because he kept how he actually felt a secret or he said or did something without explaining what he meant by it.” N said. As he spoke, Bat scribbled down what seemed to be every word he said. They seemed satisfied with his answer.

“Interesting viewpoint. Why do you think Mars and Chris clash so much?” This time when they asked the question, they looked him in the eye. N smiled, this was something he had thought about constantly since the day he first got the script.

“Their personalities. Mars is a jaded person and Chris is a happy guy. Chris is definitely someone who tries to see the bright side for everything while Mars is someone who will say it’s going to rain during a sunny day. Chris also is kind of a pushover UNLESS he’s around Mars. Meanwhile Mars takes nothing from no one. They’re both fundamentally different people. But they’re similar in a lot of ways too. They both bottle up how they really feel, they both have one person that they care deeply for, and they’re both incredibly stubborn. It just kind of melds together and creates this disaster waiting to happen.” N explained. His explanation wasn’t as detailed as he wanted it to be but that was the best he could do without going into why Mars and Chris worked as a couple. 

Bat nodded and scribbled more stuff down. 

“Why do you think Chris ran away when Mars told him that they loved him?” Bat said as they leaned back on the couch. N was pleased to note that they looked more comfortable around him than before. 

“Chris is someone who’s really good at reading emotions–which is ironic because again, he struggles with communication. And the only emotion he read from Mars was loathing. Hearing them say that they loved him—especially since Mars loathing him was one of the few things he could rely on—freaked him out. In the end running off bites him in the butt because he feels horrible without them.” N answered, feeling pretty proud of himself. 

Bat once again wrote down notes as they took his words in. They looked up at him for a split second before looking back at their journal. 

“You’re really good at this.” Bat said with surprise. 

“Good at answering questions?” N said teasingly. 

“No. Well yes. But also no. I meant you do a really good job with understanding a character and bringing them to life.” They twirled their pen between their fingers. 

“I mean, I haven’t even seen you act out one of Chris’s scenes and I feel like he’s more real than before.” They admitted, sounding impressed. 

“What can I say? Bringing a character to life is my passion.” N said with a shrug. 

“Well it shows. Anyway, next question.”

Notes for the still untitled song for the movie

Things to think about when it comes to Chris

-chris is someone who is really bad a communication. he’s also a happy guy and is the polar opposite of mars. he can be pushover unless it comes to mars

-really good at reading emotions which makes the confession with mars even more scary cause he doesn’t see it coming

-like mars, he is also in a constant state of “we hate each other” with them

-he does care deeply about mars, just as much as they care for him

-the rwb was his idea because it made their arguing even more worth it + it kept tensions low between them 

-can be kinda stupid when it comes to his feelings. i.e didn’t realize how much mars truly meant to him until after he ran off

Song should be dual perspective most likely 

“And cut! Alright, I think that was the winning take! Great job you two!”

Uzi looked up from notes to see Meg and the other actress(Uzi’s pretty sure her name is Emily) walk off to the side of the soundstage after Blaze called cut. Noah and Mira were still on the soundstage though. Guess there was still more stuff to film. This was good, maybe she could get some more inspiration out of it.

“Mira, Noah, we’re going to film Chris’s confession scene after lunch. But would you two mind going over the scene real quick? So that you have the basic idea in your head before we film.” Blaze asked. 

“Sounds okay.” Mira said, taking their hands out of their pockets.

“Sure!” Noah said cheerfully.

“On the count of three, start.” Blaze directed.

Uzi smirked and straightened up. Most of the morning had been spent filming scenes where Noah had very few lines. Which he was, admittedly, decent at. But Uzi was ready to see how good of an actor he really was. Who knows? Maybe he could make her feel something other than disdain while she watched a love confession play out in front of her.

HA! Who was she kidding, that would never happen.

“One, two, three. And go.” Blaze’s voice quickly jolted Uzi out of thoughts which allowed her to put her whole focus on the soundstage in front of her. Noah was standing in the doorway of Mars apartment with Mira standing in front of him, their arms crossed over their chest.

“Mars.” Noah’s voice was breathless and panicked. Any joy and excitement he had had earlier was gone.

“Chris.” Mira moved to block the doorway. “Why are you here?”

“I needed to see you.” Noah ran his fingers through his hair. “I need to talk to you.”

Mira scoffed. “Why? Last time I tried to talk to you, you ran away.” They unfolded their arms and grabbed the doorknob, ready to slam the fake door shut.

Uzi hated to admit it, but Noah and Mira were talented enough actors that she actually was invested. Only a little bit though.

“I know and I’m sorry. Please hear me out.” To emphasize his point, Noah put his hands together pleadingly. Mira’s grip on the fake doorknob loosened.

“You have two minutes.” They said. Noah let out a sigh of relief and pretended to pull out and open an invisible piece of paper.

“What is that for?” Mira asked. Uzi was impressed that they were able to go along with this so easily. Especially since Noah wasn’t even holding a prop

“I suck at communication. You know this, so I wrote everything I want to say to you down. Here, just let me read it.” Noah said, causing Mira to say and wave their free hand to give him the go ahead.

“Mars, you and I have always been in this cycle of “we hate each other” since the day that we first met. And for years it was the one thing I could rely on. But there were so many things I didn’t realize about how I felt when it came to you that had nothing to do with hate. I purposely seek you out even though I know it’s going to make me angry afterwards because when you notice me I’m filled with relief. When you talk, no matter the context, all I want to do is be near you. And when you smile, you’re the only thing that matters in the world. What I’m trying to say Mars is that I love you and I’m sorry it took me so long to realize.” When N finished speaking, Mira’s hand left the doorknob and they started saying something else but Uzi couldn’t hear them.

A dull ring was filling her ears as a flash of texts from N filled her mind. Two weeks ago he texted her about a line that was stuck in head. It was similar to the speech. Shakily, she pulled out her phone from her back pocket and opened her text messages. She typed a few key words into the app’s search bar. Her breath caught in her throat at what she saw.

Sat Jan 4 1:37 pm

Caden- Do you ever have something that just sticks in your head?

Uzi- hm yeah

Uzi- like a lyric or melody 

Uzi- why

Caden- I have one of my lines stuck in my head. 

Uzi- for the romcom?

Caden- Yes. 

Caden- Normally the line doesn’t linger longer than it has to. 

Uzi- what is it 

Caden- It’s a romance line. 

Uzi- okay…

Uzi- are you embarrassed to tell me

Uzi- i mean i dont like romance anything but if its bugging you so much, ill suffer to try and help

Caden- Alright, here it is. 

Caden- They hate me. I hate them. But then they notice me and it feels like relief. Then they talk,  all I want to do is be near them. Then they smile, god when they smile, the world fades away and they're the only thing that matters. 

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

The line wasn’t exactly the same as what had just come out of Noah’s mouth but it was too similar to deny anymore. Uzi knew she was probably being delusional in hoping that Noah and N weren’t the same person for as long as she did despite everything. But this was the final nail in the coffin.

Noah Elliot was N. Her stupidly sweet, dorky, and weirdly endearing phone crush person, was the same annoying, irritating, and teasing actor who she spent most of last year arguing with.

Fuck her life.

Chapter Text

Once the truth had finally dawned on her, Uzi could only do two things; Run the fuck away to her car and call her mom. It was before lunch anyway and it wasn’t like anyone was going to miss her. She ran out to the safety of her car and tried not to break her phone as she clicked on Nori’s contact. Her mom picked up on the third ring. 

“Hey kid, what’s up?” Just the sound of her mom’s voice was enough to ground her. 

“Hi mom, I, uh, have a question.” Uzi said, cringing slightly. She hated that she had to do this but desperate times called for desperate measures. If there was anyone who would somewhat understand what she was going through, it was her mom. 

“Ask away o child of mine.” Nori deadpanned. 

“How did you feel when you realized dad was part of a boyband?” Uzi asked and as soon as the words slipped out of her mouth, she cringed at the similarities her parents' story was to what was happening with N right now. 

Nori and Khan had met when they were twenty four, two years after Khan’s band got huge. He had gone to the record store Nori worked at while the band had a summer long lull in Drone City(this was also when her dad and his bandmates bought the apartment). Nori had no idea who Khan was, but she thought he was cute. They hung out a lot during that week until Khan had to leave and after that he basically disappeared for about a year until his band came out with a song called ‘Purple Eyes’. Which was very obviously about Nori. When she heard the song for the first time, she looked into his band and found out the sweet, hunky guy she had hung out with the previous year wasn’t entirely who she thought he was. So what did she do in response to this? Buy a front row ticket to see his band live in hopes that he would see her and want to talk to her. It worked surprisingly and the rest was history.

“Angry and embarrassed. Angry because I felt like he lied to me and then had the gull to write a whole ass song about me. Embarrassed because he asked me one time what I thought of the band’s music, and I told him that the band clearly was good but their music was obviously not what they wanted to do. But mostly angry.” Nori said, rambling slightly as she tended to do when it came to this story.

“But you still went to find dad. You had to have felt something other than those two things.” Uzi pointed out, tapping her fingers anxiously on her window.

“Nah, it was mostly anger. That’s why I went to the concert hoping that he would see me. I wanted him to invite me backstage so I could yell at him.” Nori said simply, like this was common knowledge.

“You went to the concert to yell at dad?” Uzi was stunned, she had never heard that part of the story before. Though that might have been her own fault. Curse her parents for being cheesy with each other and making her cringe.

“I thought you knew that part.” Nori said, sounding surprised.

Uzi laughed awkwardly. Growing up, she always cut her parents off once they got to the end of the concert. She always assumed they talked everything out and she didn’t want to hear about the gross couple moments they had.

“No, I didn’t. Did you actually yell at him?” She asked, more invested in her parents' story than ever before.

“You bet your ass I did. Almost got dragged out by security but he stopped them because apparently he liked my crazy. Anyway, now we’re married.” Midway through Nori started to sound suspicious.

“Okay what’s with all the questions about me and your dad when we first met? You HATE hearing about it.”

Uzi choked on her own breath. “N-Nothing’s wrong mom. Don’t jump to conclusions. Bite me.” She sputtered, but she knew she had been caught. Nori was incredibly perceptive when it came to issues Uzi didn’t want her to know about.

“Right and I’m the queen of Copper-9 and you’re secretly a princess. Your father and I have been hiding your birth right to protect you. But now that you know you must take over the throne.” Nori snarked. Uzi could practically hear her mom’s eye roll over the phone.

“Khan! It’s over, she knows now. Pack your bags, we’re moving.” 

Despite herself, Uzi laughed. “Oh my god, mom stop.” She said through her laughter.

“It’ll all be over soon, you just have to tell me what’s wrong. Otherwise you need to become a princess.” Nori said, clearly having way too much fun with this bit. 

“Did dad make you watch The Princess Diaries again?” Uzi asked, hoping it would somewhat distract her mom.

“No, I just thought it was funny. Anyway, stop distracting me and tell me what’s wrong.” She pressed.

Uzi groaned. “Okay, so you remember that guy who I texted instead of Thad last month?” She said, picking at her nails.

“Mhm, the one you have a crush on?” Nori said, a hint of amusement in her voice. Uzi’s face heated up.

“Who told you about that part?” Uzi asked, stunned.

“No one, I could just tell.” Nori sounded amused which irritated Uzi. But what was she going to do? No matter how hard she tried to hide certain things, her mom always knew.

“Well he’s Noah Elliot.” She listened to hear how her mom would react.

There was silence on the other line. She thought her mom was just processing what she said but after a few more seconds of silence, it was just starting to get weird. “Mom? You there?” She asked.

“Hm? Yeah I’m fine. Sorry, I was trying to remember who Noah Elliot was. He’s the blonde actor you argue with online, right? The one your father was convinced you had a crush on.” Nori said, shuffling something around.

“I didn’t have a crush on Noah!” Uzi exclaimed, though whether or not this was true now was up for debate.

“Right, you like the normie version of him.” Nori said with a cackle.

“Mom…” Uzi whined. Nori just laughed harder. 

“I’m gonna hang up on you and call dad for advice instead.” Uzi snapped.

That sobered Nori up real quick. “Uzi, if you value your sanity, do not ask your father for advice. He will get philosophical and at some point use a door as a metaphor.” She said, deathly serious.

“Oh I know, I just wanted you to stop laughing. Now can you tell me what to do about the Noah Elliot being N situation?” She pleaded.

“Do what feels right for you. With me, yelling at your dad was what I felt like I needed to do. Just go with your gut.” Nori said. Uzi didn’t really know what to do with that. Nothing about N being Noah felt right. Her gut couldn’t decide whether or not she should punch him or hug him.

“Okay mom, I’ll try. I gotta go now. Love you.” Uzi said quietly.

“I love you too Zi! Keep me updated or I’m asking Doll!” Nori exclaimed before Uzi hung up.

She shoved her phone down in the cup holder. What was she going to do? She wasn’t ready to go back just yet. She didn’t want to face N. How could she when she knew who he was and he didn’t know? Not to mention that she was probably The Vampire. Against her will, Uzi’s heart fluttered as she realized N had liked her music, loved it even. And still did, despite the feud. She wondered what would happen if she sent him a voice recording or called him. Would he recognize her voice? How would he react if he did? Probably badly. N would hate her if he found out who she was.

And what if the N she had been texting was a fake persona. N was an actor, he could easily become someone he wasn’t especially over text. And since he didn’t know it was her on the other end, he could have just been texting with her for shits and giggles. Maybe their friendship was all fake.

But it couldn’t have been, it felt so real. The way N treated her seemed so sincere. He liked the truly unfiltered her. He considered Uzi a friend. At least she thought he did.

Gah! This was so confusing. Everything she didn’t want confirmed finally was and in the end, all Uzi felt was conflicted. The only thing her gut was saying was avoid him until she had an actual idea on how to handle this. 

That was probably the only good idea she had all day. 

N had no idea what happened to Bat. 

After they came back for lunch, they were less than willing to talk to him. It was weird. They kept acting like the Bat he sort of knew, but there was just something off. 

Bat ignored him most of lunch, preferring to talk to Mira who didn’t seem to mind. The two of them kept talking about some guy named Bane, who N was pretty sure was Mira’s boyfriend. Occasionally Bat would glance over at him and when he noticed they would look away really fast. 

It made him uneasy. They had just made a truce, what happened? He hadn’t even had the chance to talk to them after lunch, he had filming to do. Which he had to do with Bat watching from the sidelines and scribbling away in their notebook. They also seemed to be purposely avoiding his gaze. Thank goodness they were filming scenes where he had to be distressed, otherwise his performance would be affected.

This constant turmoil went on for about two hours before Blaze finally called a break. N meandered to the snack table, hoping to drown his thoughts with desert of some sort. To his immense surprise/relief Becca had stopped by earlier and dropped off cupcakes. Which for N was the best therapy.  Especially when it looked like Becca had gone on an experimental cupcake spree again. There were the regular flavors, like chocolate, red velvet, and vanilla. But there were also ube, rose, jasmine green, green tea, and a bunch of other flavors N couldn’t tell what they were.

He happily grabbed a chocolate cupcake. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw someone grab a ube cupcake. He turned to see who it was even though in his gut he knew it was Bat.

“Picking the purple cupcake huh? That’s not surprising.” He said, the words spilling out of his mouth as soon as he was face to face with them. Bat looked mortified.

“How, you don’t know anything about me.” They said quickly. N raised an eyebrow at their tone. They sounded like they were trying to convince themself that this was true.

“I was just saying that ‘cause of your hair. It’s purple so I was just thinking it’s obvious you would want a purple cupcake.” He said, taking a step towards them. Bat took a step back, like they were afraid he was going to touch them.

N sighed, taking a bite of his cupcake. As he chewed, he watched Bat, waiting for them to run away. When they didn’t he decided to cut to the chase. 

“Did I do something wrong? You’ve been acting weird since lunch.” N asked, putting down his cupcake. Bat paled then immediately turned bright red before finally looking like they were going to be sick. They took off their mask and took a huge bite of their cupcake. 

“Are you seriously eating a cupcake to avoid talking to me? What the heck!” N exclaimed. Now he was actually mad. As far as he could tell he hadn’t done anything. If anything, he and Bat had been getting along better.

Bat just shrugged and kept eating the cupcake. He had half a mind to smack it out their hands and start yelling at them. However he didn’t want to get sued for assault because he did something as stupid as assault via cupcake.

“You are so confusing, you know that right? One minute you’re fine with me, the next you’re avoiding me.” He said, on the brink of yelling. This struck a chord in Bat. They swallowed their cupcake bite and glared at him.

“Oh I’m confusing? Hi pot, I’m kettle! Nice to meet you!” They said sarcastically, stomping towards him.

“How have I confused you?” N demanded. Bat let out a bitter laugh. 

“Every time I see you in person, the more confusing you get! Sometimes I get the version of you that I know from online. Other times, I get this weird flirty version of you. And occasionally I get a nice version of you! You never can seem to make up your mind about how you want to act with me! So yeah, you’re confusing as fuck Noah Elliot.” They snapped, jabbing a finger into his chest.

“Maybe it only seems like that because you never know how to make up your mind about me.” N countered, crossing his arms.

“Because you keep confusing me. And when you’re not doing that, you say stuff that turns my world upside down that makes me question everything I know about you.” Bat said, before smacking their hand over their mouth.

N blinked. Okay now he was thoroughly confused rather than angry. “When did I do that?” He asked. Bat looked like they wanted to die. They refused to meet his gaze.

“Nothing, never mind. Just leave me alone.” Bat said, before storming off.

N just stood in their midst, now more confused than ever. What the heck had just happened?

Chapter Text

When Uzi finally got home she was ready to commit arson.

The rest of her day on set was spent avoiding N and trying not think about anything but the song. And when she wasn’t doing that she was overthinking everything she knew about him while also wondering how two people could be as completely stupid as they were. 

Getting home made her feel like she was sane again. Finally, she was back where things made sense. Minus the fact that the apartment smelled like barbeque which was only mildly confusing rather than completely confusing. 

“I’m home!” She shouted, kicking off her shoes. 

“Hey Uzi! We’re in the kitchen.” Thad called down the hallway.

Uzi pattered down the hall and into the kitchen to find Thad sitting at the kitchen table organizing some papers into a folder, while Beau was sorting through trays of food that sat on the kitchen counter. Doll was holding three pie boxes while Lizzy was pulling out her pink cake holders that she had gotten for two dollars at a garage sale. At that very same garage sale, Uzi managed to buy a crate of records from the 80s for $10. One of the best purchases she had ever made.

“What’s going on? Why is Doll holding pies?” She asked, slipping her bag off and joining Thad.

“Because she and Doll went to a bakery for cake and got some. While they were there, they realized we needed pie.” Thad said, not looking up from his paper organizing. Uzi glanced at the top of the page. It was labeled VIDEO IDEAS so she guessed he was getting ready for next month’s videos.

“Why do we need pies?” She asked, directing this question more towards Beau since he seemed to be the one making food.

“To go with dinner.” Beau said cheerfully. 

Uzi raised an eyebrow. “What’s going on over there?” She said.

“We’re having barbecue chicken and smoked brisket with mac and cheese and collards fer dinner tonight. Ma and Lila hosted a work event of Ma’s and Lila made too much again.” Beau answered, gesturing at the countertops. 

“And the pies were needed to add to the southern effect.” Lizzy added, taking the pies from Doll.

“We got apple, strawberry rhubarb, and cherry.” Doll said, monotone.

Uzi let out a sigh of relief. “Oh thank god, I’ve been craving Lila’s cooking for awhile now. Pies haven’t been that much of a craving for me, but after the day I had, I’m not complaining. Good is probably the only thing that can save me.” She said with a grin. Lila was Aunt Alice’s girlfriend of four years and she was probably one of the best cooks in the world. Also, Uzi  just liked pie so that was a bonus.

Thad put down his papers. “What happened?” He asked as Beau looked over at Uzi in concern. Doll silently joined them at the table and sat across from Uzi while Lizzy attempted to split her attention between Uzi and put the pies down on one of the cake holders.

Uzi looked down in embarrassment, heat already prickling her cheeks.

“It’s stupid.” She said quietly.

Thad put a hand on her shoulder. “I’m sure it’s not. Besides, what are friends for if not to vent?” He said comfortingly. Beau walked away from the trays and over to the table, sitting down in the empty seat next to her. 

Uzi sighed. “It’s really stupid. You guys are gonna laugh.” She insisted.

Thad scoffed. “When have we ever laughed at you after a rough day?” He said, crossing his arms. 

“Three weeks ago, when I had a meeting with my producer. That day sucked because I ate a salad that had way too many shredded carrots on it. I ended up swallowing it wrong at lunch and was snorting out shredded carrots for the rest of the day. You guys thought it hilarious” Uzi pointed out, shuddering at the memory. 

Thad pursed his lips together, trying not to laugh. Beau, however, let out a cackle rivaled only by his mother. Uzi REALLY wanted to kick him if he didn’t shut up. 

“Oh yeah I fergot ‘bout that.” He said, still laughing slightly. Thad elbowed him to shut up and he quickly schooled his expression.

“What Beau means to say is that, laughing at snorting out shredded carrots is completely different from laughing at something that actually made you feel cruddy rather than annoyed.” Thad quickly said. 

“And that watching you sneeze carrots at dinner is funnier than watching you look sad at dinner.” Lizzy said, finishing up her distribution of the pies and sitting down next to Doll.

“The point is, we laugh at your funny suffering, not your regular suffering.” Doll finished with a nod.

Uzi picked at her hands. “You guys promise not to tease me about this? Like at all?” She said at last. 

“We promise.” Her roommates chorused.

Uzi took a deep breath, letting the words form in her mind. Finally she blurted, “N and Noah Elliot are the same person.” 

Thad’s eyes were wide open and his jaw dropped slightly. Doll seemed to be in shock. Lizzy started coughing for some reason. Beau on the other hand, seemed deep in thought. Clearly they were all as surprised as her. 

“How d'ya know that?” Beau asked.

“He said a line from the script that N sent me. It’s him.” Uzi said tiredly. 

“That’ll do it.” Beau agreed, patting her on the back sympathetically.

“That is one hell of a way to find out though.” Lizzy said, recovering from her coughing fit.

“What in the Miraculous Ladybug!” Thad blurted out. Uzi groaned and put her head in her hands.

“Please don’t compare my situation to that show.” She grumbled, “God was any of it real?”

“What do you mean?” Thad asked, exchanging a look with the others.

Since I figured it out, I keep wondering if he knew it was me the entire time? And if he did, was he trying to make me seem like an idiot? He’s an actor, playing a part is what he does. For all I know, he could have been playing the part to mess with me.” Uzi explained. 

A stillness blanketed the room, letting her words settle so that her friends could come up with an answer.

“Did you ever feel like he was messing with you?” Thad said finally. Uzi almost rolled her eyes. She didn’t though, he probably was only asking that because he didn’t know what else to say.

“No. But again, he’s an actor. Being a character is what he does.” She said with a shrug.

“You didn’t use your real name when you texted him the first time.” Doll pointed out, “Doesn’t that mean something? He couldn’t have known it was you because of that.” 

“But I shared stuff about my life that I shared to the public already. He was a fan of Bat so he could know it was me from that.” Uzi argued.

“Did ya share lyrics?” Beau asked. If she had, it would make sense if N had figured it out.

“No…Well sort of. I sent him a lyric by accident but it was from an unreleased song so he had no way of associating it with me.” She said, looking down at her plate.

“Okay, so it’s starting to look like he doesn’t know and hasn’t for the entire time. But if he did, what do you think he would do?” Lizzy said, raising an eyebrow.

Uzi had been thinking about that a lot. Most of what she came up with didn’t make sense and the main one she could think of was kind of ridiculous. But at least she had an 

“If everything turned out fake, I think he did all of this to make fun of me. Like look at Bat With A Gun, always acting like they think love songs and love itself sucks. But all I had to do was be nice to them and they got a crush on me.” She explained tiredly. She knew it sounded illogical but her last two relationships ended with her looking like a fool. With her luck that’s how this crush would end too.

Her friends stared at her for a few seconds before they burst out laughing.

“Hey, you promised not to laugh!” Uzi exclaimed, though she couldn’t blame them. It was a pretty unlikely scenario.

“No, we promised not to laugh at why yer day was bad.” Beau said through laughter. “What ya just told us was a crackpot of overthinking.”

“He’s right, that was something else. Gotta give you props for creativity though. Ten out of ten.” Thad said, wiping away tears of laughter.

“That actually would be an interesting plot for something.” Lizzy mused, “Keep that in the back burner if you ever want to write something other than songs.”

“Lizzy makes a good point. You basically just described a weird plot twist in some coming of age movie from the 2000s. Entirely illogical and would not happen in real life.” Doll agreed, a slight smirk on her face.

“Well that just means the two of us are complete idiots. Damn.” Uzi said with a sigh. She rubbed her temples, a headache was coming on. “God, I don’t know how to feel. Guess I’ll be avoiding him.”

“Why would you do that?” Thad asked.

“I don’t know how to talk to him anymore and my gut is saying to avoid him until I figure it out. Which reminds me, you guys are allowed to come on set tomorrow.” She announced. The reactions were not that enthusiastic. 

“That’s great Uzi, we’re going to have so much fun tomorrow. But also, dude. Don’t avoid him until you know what to do, that’s stupid.” Lizzy said, annoyed.

“Why? It makes sense and it’s what my gut is telling me. When has my gut ever been wrong?” Uzi countered, crossing her arms. 

“Oh that’s easy. Yer gut was wrong in 9th grade and ya thought it would be a good idea to train racoons to bring ya broken tech fer ya to fix.” Beau deadpanned. 

Uzi blushed at the memory. That end result had not been great and that might be the reason why she had to get a bunch of rabies shots during spring break freshman year.

“That was ten years ago, my gut has been pretty right about everything since then.” She said quickly, waving a hand so that they knew she didn’t want to talk about the racoon incident anymore.

“Avoiding isn’t the way to go though.” Thad said, shaking his head. “I know it feels safe but it’s not the greatest idea.”

“My mom said to trust my gut.” Uzi argued, hoping that would end the conversation. Bringing up that something was Nori’s idea usually made people agree that it was or will be a great idea in the end.

“Somehow I don’t think avoiding him is what she meant when she said that.” Thad said drily. 

“Avoiding him is the only way to avoid an argument. I don’t know what to do outside of this. I don’t even know where to start.” She argued, but at this point she knew she sounded stubborn. Too headstrong to see where she was wrong.

Doll looked up with an unreadable expression on her face. “You should try to write a song.” She suggested.

“What song could I possibly write about this situation?” Uzi pointed out, running her fingers through her hair. What was Doll thinking? There was no way in hell she could make a good song about this.

“Write a song to sort your thoughts. Or come up with a melody. Just do something to gather up your mind. You’re going to drive yourself crazy and make bad decisions otherwise.” Doll explained, like it was obvious.

Uzi blinked. She had been half expecting Doll to tell her to write a love song. But this was actual advice she could use.

“That’s a good idea. Thanks.” She said at last.

Doll nodded. “And don’t avoid him.”

“There it is.” Uzi groaned but straightened up at everyone’s glares. “I’ll do my best. No promises though.” She said quickly. This seemed to appease the others who all seemed to relax at the confirmation that she wouldn’t be avoidant. Weird. Had she acted so stubborn to the point of tension before? Any other questions were quickly forgotten as Beau stood up from the table. “Well, now that that’s settled, let's eat!”

Assistants to the Braincell Challenged

Tue Jan 21 6:48 pm

Thad- we have a problem

Cyncere- how big is it

Ponytail- a big 1

Tresemme- What’s wrong

The Falcon- i would say everything but that seems overdramatic.

Cowboy Hat and Boots- but we are allowed to come on set tomorrow so that’s good

Killer Queen- spit it out already

Thad- bat knows

Killer Queen- what

Cyncere- oh no

Tresemme- How did they find out

The Falcon- n apparently sent them a variation of a line a while ago and they remembered.

The Falcon- it was in text and everything.

Ponytail- and now they know

Scary One- How is this a bad thing? Isn’t that what this group chat was started for?

Killer Queen- yeah but like

Killer Queen- they know and he doesnt

Killer Queen- they could never talk to him again

Ponytail- yeah or they figure us out as soon b4 we even try anything

Scary One- Hm.

Tresemme- So what do we do then

Cowboy Hat and Boots- thankfully we talked them out of running away from him

Cowboy Hat and Boots- but this is still a problem

Scary One- Be more subtle.

The Falcon- what.

Scary One- You want Bat to not run away or figure anything out? Be subtle.

Scary One- And come up with an actual plan.

Thad- oh god, she’s right

Thad- we need a plan

Cyncere- tripping

Cowboy Hat and Boots- huh

Cyncere- we trip one of them while the other is walking by

Killer Queen- wed have to work the timing but that might work

Killer Queen- how strong is bat

Ponytail- strong enough

Killer Queen- thats good enough for me

Tresemme- Could we maybe come up with one that doesn’t involve the possibility of one of them getting hurt

Thad- bat’s tough, they could handle stopping n from falling on them

Tresemme- We still need more options

The Falcon- jumpscare.

The Falcon- just yell something near bat while they’re near n and they’ll jump into his arms.

Killer Queen- how can you be so sure that theyll do that

Ponytail- hm, shes right dolly

Ponytail- bat will jump somewhere, we js dont know where

Cyncere- we could make it so that they’re super close to big brother that they just end up like that anyway

Cowboy Hat and Boots- no they’ll be suspicious of that

Cowboy Hat and Boots- especially if most of are missing when the loud noise happens

Cyncere- i know a guy who dresses up like an ork

Ponytail- uh

Ponytail- thats great

Killer Queen- cyn, what does carl/kyle have to do with anything

Thad- wait, the guy’s name is carl/kyle?

Killer Queen- she switches his name between the two so i dont know what his real name is

Cyncere- and you never will

Cowboy Hat and Boots- but what does this carl/kyle guy have to do with anything we’ve been talking about for the past five minutes

Cyncere- a jump scare

Tresemme- Cyn, please tell this isn’t going where I think it is

Cyncere- *giggles* it is going exactly where you think it’s going

Cyncere- we all hang out with bat and n during a break or something

Cyncere- carl/kyle suddenly comes in and starts running amok and starts chasing us

Thad- and this would scare bat?

Cyncere- if not them, than n will definitely be terrified

Cyncere- at the very least they’d be concerned

Cowboy Hat and Boots- this plan actually might work

Cowboy Hat and Boots- would he be available in time

Cyncere- yep! just have to get him permission to be there

Scary One- I’ll email Blaze to write him up a pass.

The Falcon- i can not believe it's coming down to an ork to get these two to be closer.

Ponytail- meh, stranger things have happened love

Thad- hopefully bat doesn’t kill us

Cowboy Hat and Boots- hopefully

Killer Queen- speaking of bat, what are they doing

Thad- rearranging furniture or something

The Falcon- they said they had to do something after dinner and we went to the group chat while they went their room

Ponytail- idk what exactly theyre doing, but they are making a lot of noise in their room

Ponytail- why do u ask

Cyncere- cause big brother keeps looking at his phone sadly

Tresemme- He must be texting them

Thad- they better not be avoiding him

Cowboy Hat and Boots- there’s too much noise happening for that to be the case

The Falcon- true.

Scary One- Make them check their phone soon. N’s sad face is driving me nuts.

Tresemme- Be nice Jay

The Falcon- we’ll give them ten minutes and then tell them we are having a movie night. they always grab their phone in case they get bored while watching the movie.

Cowboy Hat and Boots- we’re having a movie night?

The Falcon- we are now.

Ponytail- ooo! we should rewatch lisa frankenstein

Ponytail- its been awhile

Killer Queen- god thats a fun movie

Cyncere- we should rewatch it too

Tresemme- I’ll put it down for our next movie night

Thad- i’m gonna get bat now

Thad- thanks for the help with planning

While her friends were plotting with N’s friends over text, Uzi was in her room having her own minor crisis.

She knew when her brain and body wanted her to write a song or just write ideas down. When it was just ideas, her fingers would twitch slightly and she’d start listing bullet points in her head until she got her hands on some paper. Sometimes she’d scratch her head a lot because she didn’t know what to do with her hands.

But when it was a song or a part of a song, all bets were off. Her hands would not stop flexing and when they weren’t doing that, they were scratching at any skin she could reach. She’d pace around wherever she was non-stop. She would always mumble whatever lyrics were swirling around in her head, occasionally humming or making some sort of musical sound to find the exact sound she was looking for with the song. Her eyes would not stop blinking and her mind would go a mile a minute. It got worse as she waited for the time to write. The only way to stop it was grab her notebook and pen/pencil, run to a small area, and start writing.

Unfortunately for her, she wanted to write a song but she couldn’t find the specific notebook she needed. The bridge for a song had come to her just as dinner ended and she had run off to go write it down. But she couldn’t find the specific notebook she was looking for. Thus, she was having all her listed symptoms times a thousand.

This also meant that her room was getting torn apart as she desperately searched for her ‘songs that will never be released’ notebook. It wasn’t under her bed, in her closet, her dresser, the box filled with notebooks that was also in her closet, or her desk. Of course the one time she needed the notebook desperately, it was missing.

After her conversation before dinner with her friends, Uzi had come to the conclusion that she was 90% sure that N hadn’t been messing with her. That he was just as clueless as she was yesterday. While there was still 10% of her that wasn’t convinced he didn’t know, she was 100% that was her negative thoughts talking. Still, she couldn't be too careful. After her last two relationships, she wasn’t going to open herself up too much without having total confirmation that he didn’t know the entire time. That didn’t mean she wasn’t going to try and gather her feelings through a song. It was how she coped after all. 

Uzi groaned for what felt like the thousandth time when she checked under her pillow and the stupid notebook wasn’t there. She flopped on her bed and screamed into her pillow. Once she was done with that, Uzi rolled over to check her nightstand drawers. First drawer was a bust, that was where she kept the instructions for her lego sets. Second drawer was also a bust, that was where she kept her favorite CDs and cassettes. Which Uzi should have known, she put that stuff there. But she was getting desperate to find the notebook before her search moved on to outside her room.

Finally she opened the last drawer and to her immense relief, there was the notebook. She must have put it there during a late night song writing binge and forgotten that she did that. A pencil was haphazardly placed next to it and Uzi snatched both of them up. Flipping to an empty page, she wrote down the song title that had been lingering in her brain since she knew she needed to write the song. Satisfied, she added the bridge which had also been lingering in her head for the past two hours.

Have We Met Before

Bridge(more to be added later)

Swear I feel you in my memory

I think I've seen you in my dreams

Maybe you and I have history

But I don't think you know me

It wasn’t exactly about her and N. The song probably wasn’t going to be a song version of how they actually met. This song was just going to be there for her to sort out feelings with how familiar N’s own personal feud with someone online felt when she met him over text. It wasn’t like it was going to get released. It was just for her and her alone. And that was all she needed it for.

“Uzi, you done?!” Thad suddenly shouted. Uzi slammed her notebook shut.

“Yeah!”

“Good, ‘cause we’re about to start a movie.”

“I’ll be out in a bit. What movie are we watching?”

“Lisa Frankenstein.”

“Oh nice, haven’t watched that one in a while.”

Chapter Text

Hello! Been a while I know. I've hit a bit of writers block but not to fret! This is not a "I'm cancelling the fic announcement." I come with art that I drew today! It's of Uzi because she's my favorite Murder Drones character and my favorite pov in this fic

Uzi's concert outfit. This is the outfit she wore for her first concert. I'm not in love with this piece but I hope you guys think it looks okay. I apologize for the shitty bats on the mesh sleeves, I'm not great at drawing tiny tiny details

And here we have Bat With A Gun themself! This is what Uzi looks like on set. This is probably the best human drawing I have done ever, I really like this one

Update, added BWAG's logo. She made it when she was 14 and first became a cover artist. Doll later revamped it when their music career got serious. I think it's cute

Unfortunately that's all I have right now but I hope you guys like it! I'm very proud of myself, especially since I am usually an abstract artist. Let me know if you want something for N(you probably will get something for him) or if you want more art stuff

If you can't see the art, here's a link to my tumblr where you can see the art