Chapter Text
Soccer completely captured my attention, igniting a spark within me that made me want to train, and above all, that gold cup was something I had to achieve through my own effort, but I felt like something was missing, someone to be able to win that cup...
I was going down the school stairs grumbling, my father and I had had a small argument, he didn't agree with my football career, he wanted me to stop dreaming of being the best forward in football and to get my feet on the ground to focus and graduate from a university to then dedicate my life to his company. We didn't reach a good understanding, so I left the house angry to take the limousine to Hakuho. As I was going down the stairs, I bumped into an albino young man, accidentally knocking his phone out of his hand.
His reflexes to catch and reach the ball captivated me; he needs to be on the soccer team, or rather, I need him on the soccer team.
I needed him with me, by my side.
Because of him, football makes sense every day; for me, it was a joy to share the field with Nagi, and the happiness of seeing him score a goal filled me with emotion.
After all, he is my treasure.
(...)
Today, December 3rd.
We had left the school early; the math teacher for the last period had been absent due to health reasons, so they decided to give us permission to leave early. As always, in the company of Nagi, we walked through the park located around the corner from Hakuho.
The pink cherry blossom leaves sprouted and danced in the gentle breeze that accompanied the peaceful walk of the two young men. The comfortable silence made Reo think of all the right words to confess his feelings to the albino.
I stopped walking, watching the cherry tree's leaves dance; a small blue canary had perched on the branches of the cherry tree. The other albino boy also stopped his stroll when he didn't feel his purple-haired companion following him, even though he was distracted with his phone in hand.
Reo had rosy cheeks, his purple hair swayed in the breeze, his purple eyes were focused on the tree, he wasn't sure if what he was about to say to Seishiro was a good or bad idea.
"Nagi." I murmured, taking a gentle breath while trying to calm all my nerves. "I want to talk to you."
"Did something happen, Reo? It's not very common for you to sound this serious."
I nervously lowered my gaze to Nagi's shoes. Had I sounded too serious? I wasn't sure, the only thing I could solidify was my goal to confess, it was now or never.
"Yes, something happened these past few months, Nagi."
The boy's calm and bored expression changed to one of concern.
"But it wasn't anything bad, it's quite the opposite, Sei." I sighed, the words got stuck in my throat, turning into a heavy knot of nerves. "Nagi, this is a bit difficult to say, but I hope that what I confess won't change our friendship and that we can continue being friends.Nagi, this is a bit difficult to say, but I hope that with what I confess, our friendship won't change and we can continue being friends."
"Why would that happen, Reo?"
Because in most rejections, the rejected always end up distancing themselves for a period of time to heal calmly.
"It's just that in many cases, people end up drifting apart for weeks, months, years depending on the circumstances, you know, they might never see each other again."
Nagi's face was one of total confusion, with his mind starting to flood with questions. Did Reo want to destroy their friendship? What was the very important thing he wanted to confess? Why would their friendship break in the process?
The breeze hit my face, Nagi's attentive gaze on me made me even more nervous, I clenched my hands, gathering the necessary courage to start speaking.
"Nagi, when I found you that afternoon on the stairs, I didn't think I had found the true treasure I needed to look for. I love your company; it's an immense warmth you give me every day just by being there. I can't even find the words to explain it, even though you seem more lost in space, in video games, or even sleeping in class. To me, you are very special. Football is more fun with your company. Nagi is interesting and passionate... Nagi, I lik-"
"Isagi!!"
Nagi's scream interrupted and completely bewildered me, my purple eyes widened with disbelief and absolute surprise at his scream, I didn't expect that. Nagi had stopped paying attention to my confession as he fixed his gaze on the boy with ebony hair.
Why, when he finally mustered the courage to confess his feelings to the person he likes, does this happen? Why?
On the other side of the street was Isagi, accompanied by another boy who wore a dark hood to hide his hair. From what he could see through the loose strands, they were also jet black. Both were carrying backpacks and wearing uniforms, which led him to think that the two boys had just come out of school.
The one named "Isagi" didn't hesitate to run into Nagi's arms, who was waiting to envelop him in a strong and warm embrace.
A feeling of frustration and nerves took root in my body, clenching my jaw tightly and unconsciously.
I didn't know if it was because of the fact that he had interrupted his confession to the albino or if it was because that boy with jet-black hair named Isagi was very close to Nagi.
"Nagi! How have you been these days?" I give him a smile as I break the hug. "Oh, you're Reo, right?"
"Reo, you didn't forget about Isagi, did you?"
Forget about Isagi?
Of course not, how could I forget him, if it was because of him that you left me alone all day at the football championship we were invited to, and to top it off at the end of the day you wouldn't stop mentioning how happy he made you play football, the new feeling of excitement and fun that you needed...
I denied.
"How could I forget you, Isagi?"
I extended my hand, but a feeling of nervousness and unease formed within me when you shook my hand; unlike mine, which trembled, yours was warm and very confident. Why do I feel so anxious? That new discomfort settled in my chest, hurting, tightening there.
They started an entertaining conversation in which only Isagi and you participated, the other guy and I just listened attentively to every word you both said, occasionally I would chime in with short words or just nodding in response, the laughter between you two was never absent in each sentence.
I wondered something while examining the way you looked at Isagi; your gaze was very different when it came to him. Your almost expressionless gray eyes had a slight glimmer of affection, and the subtle smile you gave to Isagi was beautiful.
How I wish you would look at me the same way too, Nagi.
I blinked quickly upon feeling a strange itch in my eyes, lowered my head, closed my eyes, and my purple hair covered part of my face. Besides, they were both enjoying the conversation too much to pay us any attention, so there was no reason to worry. Tears threatened to spill every second.
My blurry vision traveled to the other boy who was also static and silent. Since he had arrived with Isagi, the boy's unease wasn't as palpable to those two, but it was bad enough for me to realize that I wasn't the only one struggling with their interaction. His hands fidgeted nervously, and his tense demeanor was noticeable to me; he needed help to get out of there.
I had to find a valid excuse to get both of them out of here.
"...it was thanks to Reo" I snapped out of my thoughts as I felt Nagi's arm wrap around my shoulder, pulling me slightly against his body. I had gotten so lost in my thoughts that I had stopped listening to their conversation.
My heart started racing as Nagi's arm pulled me closer to him; I could bet my cheeks were red from how hot I felt.
"I see," Isagi said with a laugh as he approached Nagi. "Do you want something to eat? My treat."
The jet-black boy with the hood slowly lowered his gaze, the bicolor bangs and part of the hoodie covering his eyes as he bit his lower lip hard, trying to hold something back. I took a deep breath when I felt Nagi's arm release me and he resumed his conversation. I sighed, hoping that at the moment he was going to speak, no sound would betray that I was feeling unwell.
"There's a donut stand over there" I caught the attention of the three, grateful that I hadn't stuttered or anything "You guys wait for us here, okay?"
I grabbed the boy with the jet-black curls by the arm to move us a few meters away where we wouldn't have the gooey look that was starting to form. The boy took off his hood, releasing his jet-black and yellow hair. From his pocket, he took out a white handkerchief and brought it to his mouth, starting to cough violently. I began to pat his back, trying to calm him down.
"Hey, take some water" I took a bottle of water from my backpack and extended it towards him.
"Thank you, thank you very much, really, I could no longer tolerate the environment, I felt like I was going to die at any moment."
I gave him the point; the atmosphere they had both created was torturous for both me and the one with yellow highlights.
"I understand you, by the way, I'm Reo."
"Bachira, it's a pleasure to meet you. " He extended his hand to shake mine.
"Now that I see you up close, I think I saw you play in the championship with Isagi, but I never had the chance to approach you."
"Oh, were you invited too?" I nodded gently. "I never saw you, I think I was spending a lot of time with Isagi back then, the two of us were inseparable.I never saw you, I think I spent a lot of time with Isagi back then, the two of us were inseparable."
His voice began to break as he finished the sentence, the silence flooded the place until it was interrupted again by some coughs from Bachira, but this time more forcefully, pulling out another handkerchief, placing it on his back to give him support.
He regained his composure while looking at me, he had dark circles under his striking golden eyes and was slightly pale.
"Do you like something? It's on me."
We ordered some donuts and some for our companions as well, we stayed chatting for a while, gaining his trust was a bit difficult but my persistence paid off, amidst tears he confessed to me that he was in love with Isagi and he was indirectly rejected.
Returning with Bachira more calm, we found ourselves sitting together on one of the park benches, you were gently caressing his jet-black hair as if each strand were fragile and could break.
Isagi was an angel before Nagi's expressionless eyes.
I want you to look at me the same way you look at him, no, rather, I want to be him.
Bachira said goodbye to me as quickly as possible, thanking me for the donut, and ran out of the place. I could swear he was crying... and so was I.
With my heart in hand, I decided to take another stroll around the place, more than one tear escaped me in the process. Why was I crying if he only made one more friend? Not just a simple friend, he's not that affectionate, but I am that affectionate and we're still nothing.
(…)
I walked alone today; I hadn't asked to be picked up because my main plan to confess had been a failure. It was supposed to be that after that, we would both go back together. However, after my solitary walk, they were both standing patiently waiting. Nagi had decided to accompany Isagi home.
The apartment was completely dark, my parents still hadn't returned from work, most likely they would arrive late as always, I threw my things onto the big sofa in the living room. I tightly closed my eyes, they burned a lot; I had wanted to cry since Nagi decided to accompany him home, leaving me alone.
This was the second time he did it, the second time he left me for him, for Isagi.
The first sobs came from my throat until they broke into a cry. I ran my hand through my hair, trying to calm myself, and with the other hand, I covered my mouth in an attempt to stifle the sobs.
Nagi, what did you see in Isagi?
Dragging my feet, I made it to my room and threw myself onto my bed while my sobs grew louder with each passing second. My throat and eyes burned; I needed someone. I searched for my phone, the brightness made me close my eyes, and I could feel the tears that had accumulated start to fall. I dialed Chigiri, who answered after a few attempts.
Chigiri's words of encouragement eased my crying a bit, his distress at not knowing the reason for my desperate sobs frightened him, I couldn't utter a word, my sobs overwhelmed me, I felt pathetic for reaching these extremes, what if I'm confusing and exaggerating everything? What if Nagi just tried to be polite to Isagi? Am I misinterpreting their relationship?
Chigiri's comfort allowed me to rest peacefully, it had cleared my mind in a brief conversation with the redhead, we were thinking that we both became good friends after the championship, my sobs gradually subsided, my sore eyes began to weigh down, I buried my face in the pillow while hugging him tightly.