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Will, December 22nd
"What are your plans for Christmas, bro?" Will asked as he cleaned up glitter from the ground. Abby was lucky she was such a fantastic worker, or he'd be threatening to sack her for the explosion of sparkles that had covered both himself and James at the end of filming their latest video. A New Years special that was being filmed now to give Mikey time to edit it between the holidays. He should really give the man a bonus.
James put away his phone after taking a selfie with all the glitter in his hair and shrugged, "Both my parents are doing their own things this year. Mum is away to Cornwall and dad is in Sweeden. I’ll probably just watch cheesy Christmas films with the cat then cry myself to sleep."
Will’s brow furrowed at that, “What happened to that lad you were seeing?” James had been dating some hipster for a few months now. Will didn’t really like him, but things looked like they were going well. James was happy so Will had bitten his tongue and chosen not to say anything other than positive encouragement for the budding relationship.
James blushed and looked at the floor, “Oh he uh, before I went to Australia, he told me he wanted to be in an open relationship, but I don’t fuck with that, so we broke up.”
“Why didn’t you tell me lad? I’ve been sitting here thinking things were going well!”
James shrugged and played with his empty coffee cup, “I guess I was a bit embarrassed after talking about him all the time then he went and done that, I didn’t want you to laugh at me.”
The words stung Will a bit, James had been there for him when he broke up with Mia then when he had to give up Basil. He felt like such a shit friend to not have even noticed that James had stopped talking about the guy.
“I wouldn’t have laughed at you, Jim, we’re mates, you’re meant to be able to tell me this shit.” Will finished clearing up as much of glitter as he could but had a feeling he’d be finding sparkles for months to come. The silence between them as he put the dustpan and brush away made him feel a little sad, but he left the conversation there, maybe James just didn’t want to discuss it.
They said a more subdued goodbye than usual, Will wishing everyone in the office a Merry Christmas for when it came. The sadness stayed in James’ eyes and Will could barely stand it. Instead of going straight home, he raided the piles of stuff they had opened recently, putting a couple items in his backpack to take home with him.
He had a plan that may have seemed way too sentimental, but he couldn’t let James spend Christmas alone. Zipping up his jacket he left the office and prepared to brave the shops. It was three days before Christmas and the whole town was heaving with people, but Will was now on a mission to save James from being alone on the one day when no one should be alone. People pushed and shoved in the shops, the queues were massive and everywhere stank of the faux festive smell of pine and cinnamon. It was almost too much but Will was determined. He had run to Brighton for James; the crowds would be an easy battle.
James, December 24th
Otto meowed at James, eager for his lunch. When James ignored him in favour of swiping up and onto another TikTok, the cat jumped onto the coffee table and pawed at the Firestick remote laying there to make it rattle, determined to get his owner’s attention.
“Okay, okay, you win. You’re going to get fat you know, you were only fed three hours ago,” he gave in, sitting his phone down and standing up from the sofa. Otto churred happily and led the way to the kitchen, standing by his bowl patiently as James retrieved a pouch of Sheba from the cupboard. His hand was headbutted with affection as he opened the packet and tipped it into the empty bowl. He gave his little friend a scratch on the head and binned the empty packet.
He ran a hand through his hair and looked around the kitchen, trying to decide what to have for his own lunch. He had stocked up enough food to get him through the week but none of it seemed appealing. The loneliness gnawed at him, and he found himself wondering if he should call that guy. Maybe they could make things work out. He shook his head and pulled open the loaf of bread sitting on the counter. He was far too possessive to share with anyone else.
He made himself a ham and tomato sandwich and settled back on the sofa, flicking through Netflix to find the first of the night’s cheesy but festive films. Miracle On 34th Street seemed like a good place to start. His phone vibrated noisily on the table as he finished his lunch.
Will: what you up to mate?
James answered with his chosen movie and returned the question to Will. It was read instantly but a reply didn’t come.
He shrugged and went to put his plate in the sink. Looking around he couldn’t see Otto, but he guessed the cat had fucked off to sleep somewhere after his meal. If Otto had any decency he would at least snuggle with James after using him for food, but cats are fickle creatures and affection is always on their terms not on their owners’ wishes.
Sighing to himself he retreated back to the living room, making himself snug under his soft blanket and hitting play.
Barely half an hour into the film there was a knock at his front door, and he racked his brain trying to think if he was expecting anything or anyone. He uncocooned himself from his warm nest and trudged to the front door.
When he opened it, he was surprised to see Will standing there, wearing his ‘Daddy’s favourite’ t-shirt and his hands full with two carrier bags, a bag from Nobu, and a gift bag. A massive grin was on his face.
“Will? What’re you doing here?” James asked, puzzled but stepping aside to let Will in the flat.
“Spreading festive cheer lad, what’s it look like?” Will toed his shoes off at the front door, knowing James didn’t like outdoor shoes on the carpet, and walked ahead of James.
James stood a little speechless but closed the door and followed him into the flat.
“I figured, y’know, I don’t have anywhere to be, and I knew you didn’t have plans so here I am,” he said it with such simplicity, like it was completely obvious and James was the dumb one for not predicting his friend would show up at his door. “I feel like I’ve been a shit friend lately and I wanted to make it up to you, so I brought sushi, snacks and drinks.” Will had made his way into the kitchen and started to unload his shopping bags, laying out things that James remembered having liked in past videos they had done together, like Swedish Fish, black cod from Nobu and Mountain Dew: Pitch Black.
James could feel his heart melting and threatening to overflow with affection for the smaller man, feeling completely speechless at Will’s actions. “You didn’t have to do all this, Will,” he started but Will held up a hand then handed him a navy t-shirt.
“Yes, I did, now go put that on and we can watch whatever cheesy films you had planned to watch.”
James unfolded the t-shirt and burst out laughing, “You really want me to wear the ‘Daddy’ t-shirt?”
“Well, I can’t be Daddy’s favourite with no Daddy, can I? Go on lad, I’ll stick the sushi in the fridge.”
James did as he was told and went to his bedroom, disturbing Otto from his slumber on the bed. He pulled off his standard black top and put on the t-shirt as requested, feeling slightly overwhelmed with the efforts Will had gone to.
He emerged from his room to find Otto had been scooped up into Will’s arms, a paw outstretched as he looked about in vain for a surface he could jump to.
“He really doesn’t enjoy you picking him up, bro,” James laughed as the cat tried to escape Will’s clutches.
Will just rubbed his face into Otto’s fur. “Nah lad, he loves his Uncle Will.”
Otto’s unhappy meow was a good argument against that statement as he tried to push his front paws against Will’s arm, claws out.
Will yelped when a claw grazed his skin and he quickly put the cat down on the kitchen counter. James rushed over and grabbed Will’s arm to inspect the damage, glad to see there wasn’t any blood. He rubbed his thumb over the red mark that had quickly started to rise up in a sharp line.
“Just a scratch, you’ll survive. Told you he doesn’t like it.”
Will reached over to pet the cat’s head to let him know he was forgiven. “Yeah, but he’s just so cute. Speaking of, nice t-shirt.”
James grinned; he had forgotten that he had just changed into the ridiculous thing.
“We should take a selfie,” James suggested, pulling out his phone.
“Yeah, but in front of your Christmas tree, make it all festive and shit.”
James agreed and led the way to the living room until they reached the brightly lit tree. Will wrapped his arm around James’ waist and James flung an arm over the smaller man’s shoulders, both smiling brightly. James angled his phone to get them both in the picture along with their t-shirts and snapped a few pictures.
“Can I put it in our group chat? Orla and Abby will love it,” James asked, knowing how much effort the girls put into finding items for all their videos.
“Yeah lad, though Mikey will probably rip the piss out of us.”
“Probably,” James let his arm fall off of Will’s shoulders and set about posting it to their WhatsApp chat with the caption ‘Santa brought me an early present!’. Orla was quick to react to the picture with a heart and the message ‘Will’s such a sap, have a good night guys’. James hearted her message and put his phone in his pocket.
Will clapped his hands together, “Right, what we watching lad?”
They spent the evening watching A Muppet’s Christmas Carol, Love Actually, then Nightmare Before Christmas. They munched their way though snacks and were relentlessly meowed at while they ate sushi and black cod. Will gave in and fed Otto some tuna straight from his chopsticks.
It was just after eleven at night when Will started to fidget, and James thought perhaps the Geordie was wanting to call it a night and head home before he had to pay triple fare on a taxi.
“You alright mate?” he asked, not wanting to suggest his friend go home yet, but also not wanting him to think he had to stay longer than he wanted to, just because James was lonely.
“Aye lad, just excited to give you your Christmas presents,” Will admitted but got up and went to the kitchen to fetch the gift bag he had arrived with.
James instantly felt a little bad, they hadn’t agreed to get each other anything, they never usually did, and he voiced his apologies when Will came back in the room.
“Don’t be daft lad, you didn’t even know I was planning anything. And besides, I wanted to surprise you! They’re just silly things, pretty naff to be honest,” He tried to downplay the gifts as he handed the silver holographic gift bag to James and sat back down, “The packet of Bonkers are for Otto by the way, don’t try to munch them.”
James laughed and removed the pink packet from the top of the gift bag and sat them on the coffee table. Inside was three packages wrapped surprisingly well in paper that was covered in Prime bottles, cartoons drawings of every flavour. James had a smile on his face as he rolled his eyes at the paper.
“Where on earth did you get Prime wrapping paper from?”
“One of the Christmas markets in the city, she had all sorts of weird shit,” Will’s knee was bouncing a little.
James carefully unwrapped the first gift from the bag, to discover a similar version of a fidget toy he’d played with in one of their videos. The one where he had to pop in the bubbles in a certain order. This one had a cat on top and looked a lot more robust than the one he had played with. He turned it on and was instantly distracted into playing several levels before lifting his head to look at Will. “This is amazing, do you have any idea how much I’m going to play with this on the train?”
“Yeah, and probably drive everyone bonkers with the beeping. But hey, I knew you loved the one we got in the studio, so have fun torturing everyone with it.” Will looked pleased with himself.
James managed to put it down and turn back to the gift bag, pulling out the largest gift, leaving the little square one for last.
Inside the wrapping was a Hotel Chocolat Velvetiser, like the one they had unboxed in their Mystery Box video. It was packaged on top of a mixed box of the same company’s Everything Latte pouches.
“I know you said you don’t like hot chocolate but apparently the lattes are bangin’,” Will explained as James read the back of the Velvetiser box, “You can even add ice and your soya milk and make them iced lattes but with the velvety goodness.”
“Black Sheep will be gutted if I start making my own drinks,” James joked, “thank you, Will, I have been thinking of getting one since the video. I even saw people put regular coffee in it and it makes it extra amazing.”
“You’re welcome lad. Right, last one, it took some finding, but I think you’ll like it,” Will encouraged, helping James by sitting the box of latte sachets on the table.
James took the last present from the bag and added it’s wrapping to the pile of rubbish tucked in at his side. He carefully opened the small gift box to reveal a little heart-shaped earring with Tiger’s Eye in the middle of it.
“Oh my god, Will, I- I love it, thank you.” He set the box down and wrapped his arms around Will’s lithe frame, hugging him as hard as he could, trying to convey his gratitude. Will hugged him back, giving him an extra squeeze before they let go. “I’ve still not been able to get this damn hoop out my ear,” James admitted as he started trying to fiddle with it. His piercer had fitted it when he first got his ear done and he hadn’t been able to remove it since.
“Let me see,” Will moved closer and brought his hands up to James’ ear, pushing aside his hair to get a better look. It felt intimate and James was almost scared to breathe as Will’s gentle fingers wiggled the hoop around until he gave a triumphant “ah-ha!” and freed James of the little gold hoop. He sat it carefully on the table and picked up the box with the heart in it. James wanted to tell him he could probably manage to get the stud in himself, but Will was already taking off the butterfly backing and sliding the post in the hole left behind. The backing was attached, and Will’s fingers gently stroked the shell of James’ ear, looking at it with an air of satisfaction and pride.
“How’s it look?” James half-whispered, the moment feeling fragile and he was scared to break it.
“It looks really good, Jim,” Will’s fingers were still hovering just on the cusp of James’ ear. James tilted his head a little, looking Will in the eyes. Will’s thumb brushed over the delicate skin just below James’ ear and James’ brain could barely process what was happening as Will leaned in and pressed a kiss to James’ lips. Will’s lips were soft, and it was over in a second, the smaller man pulling back a little bit. James didn’t even know he had closed his eyes but when he opened them Will was looking into them, searching for an answer to a question that James wasn’t even sure was being asked. Will asked it anyway.
“Is this okay?” Will’s quiet voice matched James’ whisper. His hand still hadn’t moved away, instead he brushed his thumb over the stubble of James’ jaw, a gentle motion that James automatically leaned into, nodding his head.
Will nodded back then leaned in again, James meeting him half-way. It was slow, curious, cautious, both seemed scared to push it too far too fast. James let his hand go to Will’s thigh, just above the knee, not daring to go further.
Will’s other hand came up and cupped James’ jaw, fingers going into the hair at the base of the younger man’s neck. James let out a tiny moan, he’d always found his nape to be extremely sensitive. Most guys he’d encountered just wanted to grab his hair and use his locks as a means to set a pace that James wasn’t always comfortable matching. Will was gentle, the touch almost sensual and it made James melt a little.
Will’s tongue graced James’ bottom lip and James obliged him entrance, letting Will explore. Their tongues glided off of each other and James wrapped an arm around Will’s waist to pull him closer. He could barely let himself think about what was happening, about what it might mean, so he just gave into the moment and let it happen.
Eventually, when both their lips were swollen and both of them were a little breathless, they parted, foreheads pressed together and clinging to each other.
James was first to break the silence, words tentative and unsure. “I didn’t think…” he trailed off, unsure what to say. Didn’t think you liked men? Didn’t think you liked me? Didn’t think there would ever be anything more between us than friendship?
Will huffed a laughed, “I went to Paris to watch your show, I ran to Brighton for you, you clueless idiot. It’s been you for so long, I just couldn’t work up the guts to say anything, then you got with that guy and well… yeah.” Will pulled back a little further, a blush on his cheeks as he ran a hand over James’ shoulder and onto his developing bicep, giving it a squeeze, “No one else can drive me completely insane and yet make me so happy at the same time.”
“What about George Clarke?” James grinned but chided himself as soon as he said it, he really was an idiot who just had to spurt out idiotic questions at the worst times.
“I knew you were actually jealous!” Will smacked James’ arm lightly then looked into his eyes, “he’s just a friend, you know you’re so much more than that to me.”
And now that James knew how Will felt, he could look back and see it. All the things Will had done for him that no one else would have. Will had saved him from the brink of alcoholism, supported him and provided an income when he had poured all his money into his music, he’d even insisted that he buy his ticket to the Paris show, not wanting a free pass. It was almost all too much for James to process.
“I don’t deserve you, Will,” James uttered, and was pulled tightly into Will’s arms for saying it.
“You deserve the world and so much more,” Will said firmly, like there was no arguing about it, and pressed another kiss to James’ lips.
From outside church bells started the chime, signalling midnight.
“Merry Christmas, Jim.”
“Merry Christmas, Will.”