Chapter Text
In retrospect, maybe Scott had been naive. Maybe he could have seen it from a mile away, and yet, he still opted to be optimistic and ignore the red warning. He had the excuse that it wasn’t exactly obvious, just suspicious, but even as he tried to reason with himself, at the end of the day, he would still blame himself. Because as much as he hated to admit it, one of his biggest flaws was his guilelessness, tied with how he’d always expect the best from people.
He was old enough to know that things were rarely nice in South Park.
It started as any other day: Scott Malkinson had gone to his morning classes as usual, bored to death at all the complexity that was freshman-year subjects. He didn’t talk much in class, genuinely trying his best, and once it was recess he moved to the cafeteria on his own and waited for his friends to come from their respective classes by the entrance. Not seeing Kevin or Bradley anywhere, he took his phone and opened one of his favourite freemium games, presuming his energy would be fully restored by now.
He didn’t get to play much until he felt a presence getting closer. Scott raised his head to check for his friends, however, he was met with brown hair, which did not match Kevin’s raven hair or Bradley’s dark blond. He gave the stranger a quick polite nod before returning his attention to his device.
He had reasoned the student would walk across the cafeteria’s entrance, or maybe walk down the hall, but no. They kept moving forward until there wasn't much of a distance between the two and it made him anxious. Were they a bully? Did he do something? Maybe making eye contact was a fatal mistake and he’s now become prey—
“Hey… Scott, wasn’t it? Scott Malkinson?”
He felt as if he’d been electrocuted. That voice… it felt different, but somehow, not entirely new. Almost as if he had heard it before… Before puberty had hit its owner, dropping a few pitches yet still that voice.
Scott decided to look at the other, truly look at them this time. The boy was probably his age, and although he was taller by a couple of inches, he still had some baby fat on his cheeks. His hair was parted in a way that felt natural, and his dark eyes had a hint of honey and it was then when it clicked… why everything about him felt so familiar. He knew who that guy was.
“Clyde? Clyde Donovan?”
Upon hearing his name, the tall teenager grinned with his stupidly white gums and fixed his posture. “You do remember me! Gosh, I thought I was making a fool of myself for a second there!”
Scott could feel the redness starting to fade into his cheeks and he caught himself praying his freckles were enough to mask them. “I— It’s just—” He mentally cursed his overbearing lisp for making him sound more nervous. “You have grown so much! We were the same height before. And you were definitely fatter back then…”
“Hey! Not cool, dude.” Clyde playfully pouted and his heart skipped a beat. “I've always been big boned, you know it.”
He looked away, forcing out a laugh. “Sorry, sorry. But that’s in the past anyway. Now you look… you look…”
Hot. He looked fucking stunning.
He gulped. There was no way he was admitting that out loud. To start, Scott hadn't told a soul that he swung that way, and that was something he had decided to take to the grave, or at least outside this town, if possible. Secondly, Clyde was as straight as a board—he might have stopped talking to him, but Scott had eyes and ears. Not everyone was a shadow like himself; Clyde was as popular as he was attractive and would use both attributes to get whatever girl he desired. And with every new partner, the rumours would spread like wildfire. So yeah, if Clyde Donovan had ever been interested in another boy, even if his interest in girls was genuine, the entire school would know.
Sure he knew that he wasn't a homophobe. His best friend was not only openly homosexual, but Craig had been happily taken since forever by another close friend of Clyde’s. Still, it was one thing to be friends with a gay dude, and another to be a gay dude’s source of attraction.
Not like he had any plans on coming out. Not every family could be like the Tweaks, who have been supportive since day one, or the Tuckers, who learned to accept it eventually. No, there was no way he could let his parents ever know about his interest in boys. He’d not live through that.
So, really, Scott did not want to risk it. “You look good, man.”
He gave him a soft glare and he could almost see hints of shyness blossom on his face. Almost , because the jock Clyde Donovan did not blush and Scott Malkinson was probably delusional, vision clouded by something that was not his fourth grade crush re-emerging. “Thanks. You don’t look too bad either.”
“Coming from you, that means a lot.”
“Huh? What does that mean?”
Oh. Had he fucked up? He said the wrong thing, of course. “Not that you’re not nice! It’s just that— You— You’re you so, like…”
“Oh, Clyde! What a surprise.”
Scott stared at the source of the voice, relieved to see both Kevin and Bradley moving not too far from him. “Oh, hey guys! I was just catching up with him while waiting for you.”
“Cool!” Bradley, the always so bright kid, smiled at the tall one and rested a hand on his shoulder, bringing him closer into a half hug. “It’s been a while since we last chatted! We should all have some friendly talk one of these days.”
“Yeah… I'm sorry, bro. I've just been busy with the team, I guess.”
The boy with dark brown locks left a laugh at that, and it felt forced. Scott felt tense at the interaction, not that there was any beef between them but it was a little nostalgic the way his best friends and someone who he once considered the closest friend he's ever had were chatting again.
As the blond had mentioned, it had been a while since Clyde had even looked in their direction, let alone interacted with them face to face.
“That’s fine, man. No pressure.” Bradley’s loud voice distracted him from his thoughts. “Wanna eat with us, though? Our table is quite vacant, and I’m sure no one would mind.”
Clyde looked at Scott before nervously grinning. “Oh, no, don’t worry about it. I have to meet up with the other boys, you know. We often talk during lunch about, uh, team stuff, among other stuff. The usual.”
“That’s fair.” Kevin nodded with a polite smile, but it didn't seem all that sincere. “See you around, then?”
“Of course! Bye, you guys.” Clyde was about to leave but stopped himself after one step. “Oh, and Scott?”
Scott stiffened, praying his face hadn’t flushed more. “Yes?”
“Is your phone number the same as fourth grade?”
“Uh, yeah, I never really changed it…”
“Sweet! I will text you later then. Nice catching up!”
As sudden as he appeared, Clyde was gone. The short boy was confused by the interaction, and staring at his two friends, it seemed that they were a bit, too. They didn't seem to put much thought into it, however, quick to start a conversation about whatever topic crossed their mind. Scott didn't exactly pay attention, mind replaying the short interaction from minutes ago.
He couldn’t say he was displeased with it. Not at all, Scott was thrilled about it, silently smiling to himself as he poked his food. It had been what, five years since they last had a proper talk? Something around that. So, having the taller boy come towards him and not only wanting to catch up once but to keep talking more was a wonderful surprise.
This day had everything to be yet another excruciating Tuesday, but because of one Clyde Donovan, it had become much better. And it was then that Scott realised: he hadn’t felt this enthusiastic in way too long.
(He hadn’t noticed how much he’d missed the other, so used to the void that it didn't even feel that empty. And he would be damned if he even dared not to take this opportunity to cling back to him, even if it meant denying his true feelings a little harder.)