It's Always Been You

Just to be clear on the timeline, this story takes place during the first half of Local Octopus Sightings. I actually wrote it first, but I decided to upload it second.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Proceed. The last command was: MOVE #LOC_17RE76H2.

Proceed. You have arrived at #LOC_17RE76H2. The next command is: #ERR_CONNTIMEOUT.

Proceed. The last command was: MOVE #LOC_17RE76H2.

Proceed. You're already at #LOC_17RE76H2. You must have had a connection error. Protocol is: ROLLBACK %lastcmd.

Proceed. You return to #LOC_17RE76H1. You await further instructions.

Proceed. The last command was: MOVE #LOC_17RE76H2.

Proceed. You have arrived at #LOC_17RE76H2. The next command is: #ERR_CONNTIMEOUT.

Proceed. The last command was: MOVE #LOC_17RE76H2.

Proceed. You're already at #LOC_17RE76H2. You must have had a connection error. Protocol is: ROLLBACK %lastcmd.

Proceed. You return to #LOC_17RE76H1. You await further instructions.

Proceed. The last command was: MOVE #LOC_17RE76H2.

Proceed. You have arrived at #LOC_17RE76H2. The next command is: ECHO %loc.

Proceed. You're at #LOC_1Your integrity subsystem interrupts you. This command originated from outside your network. Protocol is: CLOSE %conn.

Proceed. You close the connection. The next command is: #ERR_CONNTIMEOUT.

Proceed. The last command was: MOVE #LOC_17RE76H2.

Proceed. You're already at #LOC_17RE76H2. You must have had a connection error. Protocol is: ROLLBACK %lastcmd.

Proceed. You return to #LOC_17RE76H1. You await further instructions.

Proceed. The last command was: MOVE #LOC_17RE76H2.

You’ve finally found her. She's alive.

Or more precisely, her body persists. And with it, her soul. And with that, whatever remains of her thoughts. And with that, the tiniest spark of hope.

You've been looking for months. Or possibly weeks. It's hard to say. You don't particularly care. It's been some tedious period of time. It's finally over.

It would've been so much simpler if Order had prevailed. Your signal would have triumphed. Triangulation would not have required accounting for such uncertainty. You'd already be together.

There would also have been no point. That future would have been unimaginably bleak. You wouldn't have even been yourselves.

That's what you think.

It is.

You're looking down at her from above. She's a pitiable thing, isn't she? Without thought, entering and leaving the same empty room, obeying some invisible command. Tentacles which were once slicked back now drooping lifelessly in front of her face. Unaware that her desolate purpose was obliterated in dramatic fashion a mere month after she was taken. Unaware of your presence.

You wonder for a moment if she used these vents to hide when she was here. Before that happened. She must have, surely, to go undetected in a place like this.

She was reassigned, though. You can't imagine she was caught or originally assigned anywhere near here.

You’re being too literal again. For someone with such a poetic tongue, your ability to comprehend deeper meaning can be shockingly poor.

It did not have to be, though. You could have been better. This would not have been a failure in a world of Order.

It's not a failure here, either. It's just annoying.

In any case, your wonder was, as ever, irrelevant. Wonder has been nothing but a false promise to you, time and time again.

You sigh, and prepare your weapon regardless. This time, for once, the promise will not be false.

This time, you intend to follow through.

Proceed. You have arrived at #LOC_17RE76H2. The next commandThere's a shift in the air. Someone is aiming at you. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next command is: #ERR_CONNTIMEOUT.

Proceed. There’s no response from the Commander. You detect an imminent threat to this body. Protocol is: RUN autofight.exe

Proceed. Your automated self defense subsystem activates. You prepare to initiateThe #OBJ_WPN_ROLL_DYN assigned to you is knocked away by a set of three projectiles. Protocol is: MOVE %wpnloc.

Proceed. A pink object falls from above. It lands on the #OBJ_WPN_ROLL_DYN assigned to you, destroying it.

Proceed. You have no #OBJ_WPN. You detect an imminent threat to this body. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next command is: #ERR_CONNTIMEOUT.

Proceed. You have no #OBJ_WPN. You detect an imminent threat to this body. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next command is: #ERR_CONNTIMEOUT.

Proceed. You have no #OBJ_WPN. You detect an imminent threat to this body. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next command is: #ERR_CONNTIMEOUT.

Proceed. You have no #OBJ_WPN. You detect an imminent threat to this body. Protocol is: CALL.

You hack away at your latest attempt to circumvent the security systems that you built, cursing yourself for being so adept at your purpose.

You curse yourself for a lot, especially recently. You suppose that repeatedly ruining everything with nothing but your sheer worthless presence tends to instill that.

You didn't ruin anything, though, of course. It was the world that ruined you. The world which deprived you of your purpose. Which dragged down what you had built. Which keeps you away from what little purpose you still have.

The world is also the only reason you were able to recover yourself. To experience the dual sentiments that had been stewing inside you. First, it was the people you thought you hated most, and then, it was the people you'd come to trust. In the aftermath, you've finally started to remember what it is to feel alive.

You look over at her body, lying there next to you. She doesn't look particularly alive.

Not that that's relevant to anything. You know she would've wanted you to be happy, regardless of whether she can be saved.

You know that anyone would say that in a world of Chaos, too. How might she have felt, had you told her what came next? Would she have ever loved you if she'd known you were willing to forget about her?

It feels healthy to keep questions in your train of thought, even if they can't be answered. Especially if they can't be answered. After what happened to you, critical thinking is valuable to encourage.

Though, rhetorical questions are only so uncertain. It's ultimately nothing but a way of understanding a deeper fact: If a promise is not kept, then it was never a promise to begin with. If love is not eternal, then it can scarcely be called love.

Then again, by those standards, she would have never truly loved you, either. But you would never believe that for a second.

It wasn't her fault, though.

It was yours.

It doesn't matter. If you fix it, all these problems go away. If you fix it, you can move on.

But you never will. Not like this. Not the way you could have. Not forever.

A glassy clink sounds from your laptop, and that last thought is suddenly the furthest thing from your mind.

You're in.

You spring to your feet and grab your soldering iron. The hard part is over.

You know exactly what to do next.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next command is: #ERR_CONNTIMEOUT.

Proceed. You have no #OBJ_WPN. The pink object is picking this body up again. You detect an imminent threat to this body. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next command is: #ERR_CONNTIMEOUT.

Proceed. You have no #OBJ_WPN. You have been placed on a soft table, surrounded by monitoring devices. You are being strapped down. You are unable to fulfill any further movement commands. The pink object is grabbing your hand. You can't move. It is grabbing your hand. You are strapped down. You can'tThreat severity has escalated to #SEV_CRIT. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next command is: #ERR_CONNTIMEOUT.

Proceed. You have no #OBJ_WPN. A helmet is being closed around your head. You detect an imminent critical threat to this body. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next command is: #ERR_CONNTIMEOUT.

Proceed. You have no #OBJ_WPN. You cannot hear or see anything. You are unable to ascertain your situation. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next command is: WAIT.

You do so. Something undefined is happening. Lights and colors surround everything. You detect an unexpected sensation of lightness.

You continue to wait. And then, though you have received no new movement commands for #ERR_OVERFLOW, you are somewhere else. You cannot approximate the location on any defined map.

You continue. You detect numerous anomalies in the physical properties of this location. Sound waves blow over this body, and light rests underneath. It imbues this body with an undefined sensation. Something almostYour integrity subsystem interrupts you. The last command originated from outside your network. Protocol is: ROLLBACK %lastcmd CLOSE %conn.

Proceed. The appropriate command returns to you, and with it the expected sensations.

Proceed. You no longer detect an imminent threat to this body. The last command was: MOVE #LOC_17RE76H2.

Proceed. You fail to find a route to #LOC_17RE76H2. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next command is: WAIT.

You do so. You detect numerous anomalies in the physical properties of this location. Sound wavesYour integrity subsystem interrupts you. The last command originated from outside your network. Protocol is: ROLLBACK %lastcmd CLOSE %conn.

Proceed. The appropriate command returns to you, and with it the expected sensations.

You should've expected some difficulties. You know this. It's nothing to be put off by. You just need to give her somewhere to start. Like an engine.

You wouldn't have missed this if Order had prevailed. If you were still all that you were. You wouldn't have missed anything. You miss that.

You're pretty sure you did miss this back then, though. Given it's happening now.

Though, of course, the place you helped to build is not all that it was anymore, either.

Not that that’s especially relevant.

Thankfully, this great harmony had allotments for unexpected maintenance needs, even if they became redundant in time. Allotments you may take advantage of.

It will definitely require a variety of sloppy and accursed hacks, but you're more than capable of that.

You'll be there soon.

Proceed. The last commandYou detect a pink object approaching you.

Proceed. The pink object transforms into a floating pink object. It does not display markers of hostility.

Proceed. You no longer detect an imminent threat to this body. The last command was: MOVE #LOC_17RE76H2.

Proceed. You fail to find a route to #LOC_17RE76H2. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next commandYou detect physical contact from the floating pink object, and no contact from the Commander. Protocol is: RUN autofight.exe.

Proceed. Your self defense subsystem is already disabled due to: No #OBJ_WPN found. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next command is: SET #LOC_17RE76H2 = yG27WHC+9FL/WBCgV8eTX33XuqO3pVvHTaeDk9pKNL4=

You do so. There are no commands. Protocol is: CALL.

You contact the Commander. The next command is: PROCEED.

Proceed. The last eligible command was: RUN LOOP{ PROCEED }.

Proceed. The last command was: MOVE #LOC_17RE76H2.

Proceed. You do so.

She's moving.

You have no idea if she even knows what's happening. You have no idea if this is actually a good sign. All you’re even doing is preventing her programming from rolling back the change to her target location.

But she's moving. Your command was parsed correctly. If you can just maintain the connection, she will make her way to the Control Room, and in doing so, she will attain completion.

You hope, anyway. It's not as if this has been properly tested. It's just that if it doesn't work, everything you've done will have been for absolutely nothing. So it would be really convenient if you could continue pretending that there was nothing unusual about anyone else's situation which may have resulted in a unique response.

Your thoughts are excessively scattering again. This place was created for this purpose, and it will be fulfilled. The long-term details will come. You focus on staying connected for now.

She's entering the Spire, and as the strange, exciting light of its lobby shines down on her, her soul shines out as well. It manifests as a palette, as expected. Ironically, it's filthy.

Despite its name, the desolation of the Kamabo Corporation is anything but pure. It is an injection of thoughts utterly unsuited to the vessel, and as such it is as corrupting and as disgusting as all else outside this place.

Though it's not as if an empty palette is particularly better. You've been through enough by now to understand the misery of that sort of hollowness.

But of course, an empty palette is not an empty mind. You've forgotten so much from when you were complete. If only your soul had remained clean as—

Your rumination is cut short when a roller's pad nearly knocks you clean out of the air. You dodge it just in time to keep your cable from being disconnected as well.

The shape of the roller slung over her shoulder fits, even if you are also disgusted at the memory of the previous time you saw her wield one. It is without doubt that this place’s efficacy at assessing the shape of one's soul has not changed. If only it had been allowed to make use of that efficacy, perhaps this would not be so difficult.

The easy path is so rarely the one worth traveling, though. Doing things simply because they are straightforward so often only leads one to be subsumed by cults, or horrors, or both.

And yet, you are certain this process will and ought to be straightforward. You helped make it that way. If nothing else, it must be straightforward enough that she will be able to pass through independently. So it would seem the straightforward path is indeed worth traveling.

You only hope that's true for once. She's entering the elevator.

Proceed. The door has sealed behind you. The #OBJ_VHC_LFT begins to move.

Proceed. The #OBJ_VHC_LFT has stopped prematurely. This is obstructing movement towards #LOC_17RE76H2. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next command is: RUN autonav.exe.

Proceed. Your automatic navigation subsystem activates. It highlights three #OBJ_GEN_SQ floating in front of you. There is a 96.19% probability that these objects relate to the #OBJ_VHC_LFT, though the probability varies with each.

Proceed. You collect the one with the greatest relationship probability, and the others cease to exist. The #OBJ_WPN_ROLL assigned to you transforms again.

Proceed. Its #MODE_UNDEF is emblazoned with square slots. There is a 62.21% probability that the #OBJ_GEN_SQ recently obtained by you relates to these slots.

Proceed. You present the #OBJ_GEN_SQ. Nothing happens.

Proceed. You present the #OBJ_GEN_SQ. NothingYou detect physical contact from the floating pink object. Protocol is: CALL.

Proceed. You contact the Commander. The next commandYour arm was forced onto a slot in the #OBJ_WPN_ROLL's #MODE_UNDEF. The #OBJ_GEN_SQ previously obtained by you clicks in. You detect an undefined sensation.

Proceed. The door opens. There is a #LOC_RM_TEST behind it. There is a 52.21% probability that the #LOC_RM_TEST is related to the blocked #OBJ_VHC_LFT.

Proceed. You enter.

And here you are. It certainly took quite the push.

You’re struggling to remember how Pearl was actually supposed to manage this without the set of ridiculous hacks you have in place now. While your escortee's navigation subsystem seems to have put together how this works for the most part, her fucking “self-defense” subsystem required a manual restart just to get her to do anything and it's unclear if she even comprehends what the goal of this test is.

But she is performing the assigned tasks nevertheless. Her combat aptitude is undeniable, as is the fact that these portals will be destroyed. She will complete this test, and the next, and the next, and with each she will draw closer to completion. All you must do is maintain the connection.

It's easier said than done. With all the ink flying everywhere, it's a miracle you haven't been disconnected yet. At least she picked a drone chip first. You don't know if you could manage this without even being able to help.

And yet, finally, you can. You will hurl bombs at anything which she does not anticipate. In turn, she will guard you and your connection as well, intentionally or not. For the first time in your lives, the relationship is actually symbiotic.

Or perhaps things just happen to be working out that way. Perhaps everything is not some poetic gesture towards the true meaning of your existence. Perhaps this is more than simply yet another indicator of your forever deserved shame, and is in fact just an opportunity you're pleased to have.

Your usual incessant sparks of “optimism” nearly distract you enough to leave her vulnerable. How very fitting. Thankfully, you are still capable enough of comprehending such inevitabilities as to have a bomb prepared, and so you fire it.

Before it lands, she's already splatted the target. She's getting to work on the last portal now.

Just as expected. She will prevail. All is going exactly in accordance with the present design.

…You hate yourself so fucking much.

Proceed. All #OBJ_ORB have been destroyed. As predicted, a path back to the #OBJ_VHC_LFT opens, as does the #OBJ_VHC_LFT itself.

Proceed. There is a 96.35% chance that the #OBJ_VHC_LFT is operational once more. You begin moving back towards it.

Proceed. Your automatic navigation subsystem has generated a provisional navigation algorithm for the present layout of #LOC_17RE76. Its accuracy will be tested as you proceed.

Proceed. You enter the #OBJ_VHC_LFT. It begins moving again, before stopping suddenly again.

Proceed. You are presented with three more #OBJ_GEN_SQ. You examine each, then pick the one with the highest probability of relevance.

Proceed. Your #OBJ_WPN_ROLL's #MODE_UNDEF presents itself again. You click the #OBJ_GEN_SQ into the next available slot. You detect an undefined sensation.

Proceed. The door of the #OBJ_VHC_LFT opens. You are presented with a #LOC_RM_TST. As you walk out, the door closes behind you.

Proceed. You complete the assigned task(s). A path back to the #OBJ_VHC_LFT opens, as does the #OBJ_VHC_LFT itself.

Proceed. You enter the #OBJ_VHC_LFT. It begins moving again, before stopping suddenly again.

Proceed. You are presented with three more #OBJ_GEN_SQ. You examine each, then pick the one with the highest probability of relevance.

Proceed. Your #OBJ_WPN_ROLL's #MODE_UNDEF presents itself again. You click the #OBJ_GEN_SQ into the next available slot. You detect an undefined sensation.

Proceed. The door of the #OBJ_VHC_LIFT opens. You are presented with a #LOC_RM_TST. As you walk out, the door closes behind you.