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"Ahem my guys and gal, and non-binary pals, tonight is the talent show to keep all of you awake for the entrance of the new year", Percy looked at the Hypnos kids dubiously. "For the Grand Finale, yours truly and a couple of others" he turned his hand dismissively just as Leo popped out and threw a blue hairbrush. "Ow.... Okay, sheesh. Well, I expect all you to be here at 10.” He trailed off and walked off the makeshift stage.
I made eye contact with Nico next to me and we snickered in unison. I was sure that like the younger kids plus the entirety of Hypnos would be trying to sleep through Percy and Leo’s new saga of entertainment. In another life they would have been interesting game hosts. In this life they were people made of horribly constructed dad jokes.
Nico and I puttered around not really feeling the difference of the day. A day was a day after all and work still needed to continue. Then 10 o’clock came and a half the camp sat in the amphitheater where red curtains were hung haphazardly. The beginning was fine I suppose. The Stoll brothers made a couple of jokes while stealing people’s items. At one point Annabeth walked out on stage tripped them and stole her Yankees cap back. They had the decency to look chagrined, but it did not last long since they had the skill and audacity to reveal Demeter’s Cabin redecorated. I thought the pink suited the green very well. Nico had to jab me so that I would stop laughing. Katie Gardner was looking mighty suspiciously at me.
Clarisse came up and roasted all the head counselors. My face just flushes thinking about that. Nico will make fun of me for forever.
A couple more jokes were made before Percy came out on stage. “We have decided that in honor of the old year it is only right that we re-preform it. Before we start-“A flutter of papers fell down from who knows where.
“Sorry Percy.” Someone shouted from behind the curtain.
“Um please look at the cast list please. We will begin in a moment.” Hushed chastising followed in Percy’s exit.
Leo……. Dionysus, Hephaestus, hot stuff, himself
Jason…. Dryad, Zeus, Will Solace, Narrator 1, Connor Stoll, himself,
Piper…. Aphrodite, Chris Rodriguez, Narrator 3, Herself
Percy…. Poseidon, Nico di Angelo, Narrator 2, Travis Stoll, Himself
Annabeth… Athena, Clarisse la Rue, Katie Gardner, Narrator 4, Herself
Grover….Exhausted councilor, Ares, Himself
Muttering floated up. I looked in the page in almost horror. I was about to be so embarrassed.
Scene one: A quest
Percy enters. Hephaestus, Jason Grace, Zeus, Dionysus, Athena, and Ares are sitting around a table.
Zeus: “Okay so for your next big lets save the world quest we need you to go find us Dionysus’s playing cards so we can use them instead of him.”
Percy: “I am not here for a quest. I am here to drop off this paper.”
Percy puts paper on table. Athena picks up the paper.
Athena: “This says that you are retiring.”
Percy: “Yep. So long suckers New Rome college awakes.”
Athena: “You, college?”
Percy puts on sunglasses and flips them off.
Scene 2: A budding Bromance?
Jason enters. Brick enters.
Jason: “Brick? How long it’s been since I have last seen my old friend. How I have missed you.”
Brick opens arms in a welcoming gesture. Jason entwines hands and they begin to dance. Narrators 3 and 4 enter on opposite sides.
Narrator 3: “And how they danced. For hours upon hours hoping the gods would pity the friendship between two different matters. For Brick was a total solid and Jason” Sighs. “A mere sack of liquid.”
Arrow gets shot onto deck.
Narrator 4: And the gods did. More specifically Aphrodite did. But it was in her intent that she erred, for it was not the change of friendship but the change of love.”
Jason leaves a kiss on Brick’s check and they both run off screaming. Narrators 3 and 4 make eye contact that says that wasn’t in the script.
Scene 3: How it came to be
Chris and Clarisse enter onto stage fighting. It’s very dramatic and aggressive. Suddenly Chris trips over air and falls onto Clarisse pinning her to the ground.
Clarisse: “Ugh Chris.”
Chris: “Sorry, not sorry, Clarisse.”
Clarisse: “Well get off me.”
Chris: No, I don’t think I will.”
Then Chris places a kiss on Clarisse’s cheek. Then Chris gets up and sprints away like his life depends on it.
Clarisse is stunned and bright faced then she gets up and yells for him to come back while she chases him off stage.
Scene 4: Hot Stuff
Leo enters with hot stuff written all over his chest. He goes and stands by an invisible wall and puts one arm up to rest on said wall will looking at the ground.
Nymph enters.
Nymph: OMG THERE HE IS. THERE HE IS.
Nymph chases Leo off of stage. Leo screams.
Scene 5: In a scene.
Will Solace enters.
Exhausted Councilor enters opposite side.
Both look like they could drop onto their feet.
Exhausted Councilor: “You just finished at the infirmary?”
Will Solace: “Yep.”
Exhausted Councilor: “Do you think you could…. Maybe take my cabin today?”
Will Solace: “Definitely.”
Will Solace proceeds to pass out while Exhausted Councilor stands there.
Scene 6: The breakdown of an oversimplified dynamic
Nico Di Angelo is seen resting on the floor.
Will walks over to him.
Nico Di Angelo: “I hate you.”
Will Solace: “Hmm tell that to me in three days.”
Three days later.
Nico: “I still hate you.”
Wil holds still like time has paused.
Nico leans forward to the audience. “I am fucking in love with him.”
He leans back and Will moves forward to take his temperature.
Will Solace: “Well there the problem because I am in love with you.”
The crowd explodes into laughter.
Scene 7:
Katie enters and stands by an invisible wall and puts one arm up to rest on said wall will looking at the ground.
Connor and Travis Stoll enter with a basket of eggs.
Connor (to Travis): “So you are finally going to tell her.”
Travis (to Connor): “Yes. And I am going to do it like an adult, a very manly adult.”
Katie: “Who are you pranking?”
Travis proceeds to throw an egg at her in surprise.
Travis: “WE’RE PRANKING YOU.” He yells while running off of stage.
Connor: “He means he is in love with you.” Then walks off stage smoothly.
Katie looks at the audience and then points to where Travis ran away and angles an eyebrow.
Scene 8: The Grand Finale
Percy comes out onto stage. “It is the end folks. 2025 comes to hit us in the face in a moment. 2024 was simply beautiful. There was some hardship. For me it was convincing the gods that I do need to go to college and that yes, I was more scared of Annabeth then them. But it was good. But any who let’s start the countdown.”
10… 9… 8… 7… 6… 5… 4… 3… 2… 1… 0! We all chanted.
Exactly at zero Leo came and ran out with a blue mop on his head and a lacrosse stick in his hand. He ran after people trying to hit them in the face as Percy said. Nico and I ducked out of the way and hid away for our New Year’s kiss. When we broke apart, we witnessed Percy joining the Leo Smash-Fest after stealing a quick kiss from Annabeth.