Archive of Our Own

Cheryll had soft thighs. She had lightly-colored lines stretching from across her upper rib to her stomach and down her hips. She had strong cheekbones, probably the strongest he’d ever seen. Stronger than the backs of her legs, which he’d graze over ever so often, when she’d be lying down or staring at herself much longer than most in the mirror. She had work-weary hands, her knuckles always seemed just a bit cracked, something he’d been quick to notice after kissing over her wedding band shortly after they had gotten married. Above else, when he’d lay his head on her lip, tracing lazy circles on her stomach and around her c-section scar he could feel himself drifting to somewhere, anywhere but his shitty life. He’d be lying to say he didn’t feel at least somewhat dependent on her, how did he survive nineteen years without her?
ノ
Standing in line, she shifts her weight onto each of her feet, almost admiring the woman’s hair before her. Hesitating, she just barely reaches out to the woman’s hair before placing her hands back together.
Unconsciously, she steps forward to tap the woman’s shoulder, her hand just brushing under her soft locks.
“I apologize for my disruption, but i must ask; what is it you use for your hair Ma’—“
She smiles as the woman turns around, holding her book again, now with both of her hands.
“Man?!”
Her smile falters, as does her grip on her book, falling to the floor as a barrage of apologies come from her mouth. She tucks a chunk of her hair from her temple to behind her ear as she tries her hardest to justify her assumption.
“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to assume anything”
She stammers, taking a step away from the man as she wraps her free arm over herself with a half-smile. Fortunately, he seems to take it well enough, or well enough for him to not immediately give her an appeasing look and scoff away. Instead, he flashes a soft smirk as he twists his fingers to comb through his hair.
“I don’t mind Ma’am”
His gaze briefly lingers on the front of her book, once she catches him he quickly stares back at her.
“Though, I can’t particularly say what makes my hair so..”
“Alluring”
She finishes for him, her grip tightening on her book.
“I never thought i'd see another lover of Pynchon”
He points towards her book, rummaging through his courtier before retrieving a copy of Mortality and Mercy in Vienna. Smiling almost infectiously, she flashes the cover of A crying lot before turning the book back to her chest.
“I never thought I’d never see him outside of the Americas, let alone London”
He sighs, as she tucks a non existent strand of hair back to her ear, walking forward as the line finally decides to move.
“I guess the classic’s are too good for England, no?”
She jokes, leaning into him before she catches herself, her face feeling ten times hotter than it would’ve been in even the summer
“I suppose so”
He entertains, shifting to the side and ushering for her to step in front of him and take his place.
“Thank you Mr..?”
She turns her head, squinting her eyes as she extends her arm.
“Çelik, Alec Çelik..and yourself?”
She clears her voice as the man takes her hand, bending his back leg to kiss the front of her knuckles. She lifts her hand as he holds it, his chapstick dampening her knuckles as she retracts her hand from his.
“Cheryll..Aivazian”
ノ
Tapping her nails on the hardened and polished Alderwood table, staring at the man with a hint of intense curiosity.
“Mr.Çelik..tell me about yourself will you?”
“Well, my Mother and my Father had lived in Ankara before they moved to Reading when I was younger. I’ve enrolled in King's, though I can’t quite settle on my major”
“Haven’t you lived quite the movie?”
She jokes, laughing at her own jokes, gaining more amusement from the small smile he cracks and the crinkling of his eyes. Bringing his cup just below his lips, raising his brow as he stares her down.
“I can’t say I’ve had the most eventful life, I’m sure you can relate?”
Her eyes roll, he assumes her actions as playful though, she’s one of the few women he’s known to be indescribable. He’s sure, now, she’s only teasing as she shares on her equally..dull.
“If you insist; went to a girls preparatory for secondary, my parents quite nearly loathe London and..”
She pauses, perhaps thinking of something interesting enough for a conversation starter or just something to keep their conversation going.
“I think I never want children”

She blurts, smiling less confident than she had in the few dozen moments he’d lose himself staring at or thinking of her.
“If I'm honest, i've found myself thinking about it more times than I’d care to admit”
She continues, pulling the left of her hair to run her fingers through the thick locks.
“Quite forward for a first date, no?”
He flashes another smile to her, readjusting his glasses to his forehead. Sighing, he leans backwards in his chair, his gaze once again flickering to her; now it’s her lips.
“If I’m honest, I don’t have any paternal instincts. I don’t think I’d make a good father”
She looks down at her fingers, whispering to herself before she looks back up at him, catching his swift change from aimlessly staring at her to staring at the ground.
“Well that’s already…four things we have in common?”
She says matter-a-factly, again tapping her nails as he swallows tightly, looking back up at her.
“And what's the fourth?”
His head turns, smirking as he takes a spoon to swirl through his surely cold tea.
“We both like pretty hair, and I pretty people”
Her hand, the one that isn’t twisting through her hair, slides closer to his fingertips.
“So you are flirting with me”
He looks down, moving his hand over her’s, resting the tips of his fingers just below her knuckles as she smiles.
“I’ve never been good at subtly”
She quips, moving her hand up before sliding her hand against the back of his. Looking down, his breath hitches as she smiles, again. He wonders if she’s always smiling, she’s smiling every moment he sees her but is it outside of him? He doesn’t think so, or, he doesn’t hope so.
Admittedly he only knows bits and pieces of her, she seems sarcastic enough, he’s sure witty is a better word but he can’t seem to care. He likes her, not only for the fact she’s once again, a sight for sore eyes but because she seems to be the half of him he never knew he’d needed until now. It’s corny, he knows but there has to be some kind of reason she decided to ask a stranger she just met on a date.
ノ
Her fingers trace over the braid’s twists, furrowing her brows as her veil once again conceals her nose,lips and eyes. Huffing, she turns towards her bridesmaid, one of the only women she’d stayed in contact with outside of her family and the only woman she could stand for more than an hour.
“I haven’t seen you since high school, you’ve matured quite nicely”
Akilina compliments, turning Cheryll’s head to the side as she applies an over abundance of blush over her cheeks, just barely concealing her beauty marks.
“But don’t feel that I’m older”
She pouts as her face is turned to the left, patting the brush just below her bottom lashes. Coughing, Cheryll moves the woman’s hands from her face, gesturing for her to finish tying her hair.
“It’s been a half dozen since secondary for us, I didn’t mean it with offense”
She assures, patting Cheryll’s shoulder as she moves behind her, pressing on her shoulder again but to retrieve her Osmanthus-shaped hair slide.
“Are you not concerned about the lack of guests?”
Sliding the flower clip in between the braids, she smiles from behind the woman in much contrast to the frown of her bride.
“I’m sure they’re better off at the capital”
She mutters crossing her arms before immediately uncrossing them, checking the underside of her sleeve to make sure not even a speck of her half-dried polish smudges onto her dress.
“Maybe my sisters should’ve come”
She reflects, slumping her shoulders and resting her elbows on the wooden vanity. Raising a brow before snickering, Akilina searches around the near empty vanity top before picking up sautoir.
“He bought you..this?”
She picks the necklace up, watching as it slips through her fingers, she turns to the grinning woman.
“What’s wrong with it?”
Cheryll questions, reaching for the necklace as Akilina pulls the necklace from her grasp, looking back down at it as she turns behind her.
“Don’t you think it’s a bit..tacky?”
Pulling one of the braids from off her shoulders, Cheryll toys with the loose hair at its bottom, murmuring.
“I thought it was cute…”
She sulks, frowning as the necklace is pulled to her nape, before falling just above her chest as the metal is fastened.
“Yeah well…”
She giggles, once again securing the woman’s braids as her head rests on the former’s shoulder.
“I just think you should be walking me”
She says blankly, standing and extending her hand for Akilina to take. Placing her hands over the front of stomach, the two women finally leave the room as a bouquet is shoved in her hands. Adjusting the bride’s veil, Akilina whispers to the woman as she ushers her further down the aisle.
“I didn’t mean to offend you, babe ”
Cheryll sighs, sharing a mock-weary glance as she pouts.
“I suppose I can forgive you..it’s my big day after all”
She smiles, taking Alec’s hand as she steps closer to the altar. She knows her guest list is..sparse to say the least, his looking no better but her surroundings seem to disappear. Almost like her hearing when she’s supposed to extend her hand and give her ring. Running her nail’s over the bouquet’s plastic lining, her eyes close as she leans forward to kiss him. It’s different, she’s kissed other people before and she’s kissed him way more times than that; it doesn’t feel more or less sensual just..different.
His hand moves to her left cheek, she’ll probably apologize for leaving his hand in what is definitely bright red blush. Her head cranes back as his fingers just barely touch the top of her ear, her eyes open as she sees him rather reluctantly pull away to meet her eyes. He’s many things, a similar not being one of them, but as she stares at him she can’t help but over examine every crease and indent in his smiles.
Did he always flutter his eyelashes a few too many times when he’d smiled for too long? Did his brow raise just a few inches higher than his other, or did his lips always look so soft? Did they always feel so soft? Leaning into him, she’d be lying if she said it was to test her theory. Fortunately, she’s proven correct as his hand grows more confident, cupping her face as his forehead barely touches hers.
“I love you, Cheryll”
ノ

Lying on their bed, hair sprawled against his wife’s lap, his eyes gradually closed as the smooth fingers of his wife combed through his hair. He looks up at the woman before him, her expression shifting from a content smile to a faint grin. She lifts his glasses from the bridge of his nose, opting for them to rest just above his bangs as the man laughs at his gestures. Lifting off of her to turn, he wastes little time adjusting his glasses before leaning into her and kissing her. She sighs as he breaks away, Alec smiling back at her with equal delectation.
“I’m glad it’s just the two of us” He grins, placing a softer kiss to her chin as he finally pulls from the woman.
Hesitating, she chuckles slightly, beginning to speak though when he raises a brow her words soon falter. Instead, she clears her voice, staring at the small alarm beside the two.
“Shouldn’t you be getting dressed?”
She questions, as he lifts himself from the bed, swinging his legs over the left side before standing to the mirror. Soon behind him, Cheryll crosses her arms with amusement as he briefly searches their
dresser for an appropriate shirt. He glances back to her, ushering her over before turning to face himself in the mirror once more.
“Help me with my shirt, will you?”
He asks, though he already knows her answer by the way she quickly stands from the bed, sauntering over to the man before her arms snake over his waist and she places her head on his left shoulder.
She stands behind him, taking a step back from him as he shimmies into his shirt, plucking a navy-gingham blazer from the dresser’s top. Before he can place it on, Cheryll returns from behind him, buttoning the front of his shirt as he pulls the blazer over him.
“You look nice like this”
She smiles, wrapping her arms over his collar as Alec moves his head to the side. Making room for both her head to rest on his shoulder and to stare at his outfit before he’ll have to leave.
“You sure you don’t want to come with me?”
He turns slightly to face her, sighing as she removes one of her arms from his chest to tie up his hair.
“But you’re leaving the woman you love for the thing you love, it’s ironic is it not?”
She reaches over to kiss him, landing on his temple as he smiles and returns the exchange, pressing a kiss to her jaw.
“You still know I’ll miss you, right?”
He teases, his kisses extending past her jaw and up her ear, pressing just against her temple as she reluctantly pulls him away.
“Of course, and I love you, okay?”
She takes their hands together as he kisses her on the cheek, staring at him as he moves in to hug her.
“I love you too”
ノ
Dipping underneath her weight, the two’s mattress sink as she shifts on the soft comforter, her fingers tracing the sharp edges of her sonogram photo. Briefly, her attention pulls from the photograph and to her husband, lips softening to a smile as he crawls over her. He places a hand to her upper thigh, lifting his head as he leans into her, turning his head to kiss her; he smiles, his hand now migrating to the left side of her rib. Gradually, his hand advances downward, his fingers press circles into the soft flesh. Briefly, her face contorts to an almost pouting scowl, physically recoiling soon after.

“Alec..”

Her brows draw together as her head turns, Alec lifting his head with his lips just barely avoiding her chin. The tips of her fingers lazily run through her hair, a motion she’d often replicate when playing with his own. Her fingers, now connected hands, drape over the front of her stomach, as her gaze appears to examine everything but him eventually, she settles her eyes above him though with visible effort.

I need to tell you something”

Her chest softly falls with deliberate breaths, practically heaving as she smudges the remnants of her work makeup from her eyes and reaches for his forearm. First, her grip falters, softly sliding up the flesh before pausing to stroke the soft skin. Her nails, after their caressing, begin to sink slowly into his arm, causing Alec’s arm to jerk from her hold as he swallows. Her head rears down, fingers sliding down to press at his wrist, rubbing tense circles as she’d done with his forearm. His hands rise to cup the right of her face, his thumb sliding over one of her opposite-sided beauty marks. Her lips slowly spread, using all her restraint not to cry as her hands gesture over her stomach. The slight bulge raises her hands higher, which Alec soon notices as shown by his hitch of breath.

“I don’t even know what to do,Alec”

She whispers, her tears welling in her eyes as he absently wipes them from her ducts, biting the middle of his upper lip. His hand remains on her, his thumb trailing down to her chin as she closes her eyes and continues crying. He tries soothing her, but with her being the more..vocally affectionate one his assuaging leaving little effect. Weeping softly, he stops wiping away her tears and instead allows for her to crawl closer and rest her head on his shoulder.
Eventually, then, her tears dampened his shoulder, her soft whimpers straining through the room whilst his right, then left hand rose to hold onto her back.

“I should’ve told you earlier”

Her words are muffled by the skin before she gets to finish, returning back to digging her nails into his skin. His fingers weave through her hair, occasionally stopping their massage as she dry-heaves. For what feels like, and what likely is hours, she stops crying, only hearing her labored breathing. She continues to hold onto him as she clings onto him, her arms never seem to limp or stiff even as he thinks or hopes, she’s fallen asleep and he’s managed to soothe her. Stopping her noises all together, her hands moving down to lock over his spine.

“I really won’t want this baby”

ノ

Resting his head on his wife’s damp shoulder, his lascivious urges having softened though not yet disappeared.
Stationed over his clavicle, Cheryll’s arm remains stationed over his skin, pressing her lips to his muddled hair. A brief smile rests along her lips, staring at the loose strands of hair that stick to his sudoric skin. Her lashes, just inches from him, turn to close as his hand, the one with his attention off his cigarette, raises to trace circles to the back of her hand. She whispers something to him,
he can’t quite decide whether she’s intentionally speaking low to him and blurting whatever comes to mind; a habit he’d grown to notice every time they were about to or have already had sex. Regardless, he agrees to whatever she was saying, keeping his cigarette stationed
between his lips, allowing for Cheryll’s hold on him to tighten. She kissed his hair once more, not caring for whatever dirt had come across it as she would’ve done if they were simply lying together.

“I never thought of myself as a lady wife”

She says aloud, pressing against him where only her low breathing and the small creaks in their mattress as he moves over her legs and to their nightstand are head. Smashing the cigarette’s end to the wooden ashtray,
Cheryll’s mostly lidded eyes slightly open to watch as the cigarette’s saffron colored sparks flicker asleep. The room is almost indescribable, with the miasma of both vanilla lotion and vitellaria conditioner, and the strange tang lingering in the air with their sweat-stained skin.

“You’re the best beauties I’ve ever seen, you even thought of that?”

He muses, toying with her wedding band, the metal pressing beneath his fingers. Unfortunately, he can’t see the small blush which passes up her cheeks whenever he manages to substantially compliment her, he considers moving their position so that he can see her. Deciding not to do so, more than content with lying in her arms.

“That’s one of the longest sentences you’ve said since you married me”

She smiles, now completely relaxing her face to his hair, she moves her hands, causing his own to jerk back and instead take her’s as he breathes softly. Looking down to him, or, the parts the can see that his hair doesn’t conceal, she wonders if this is what it’s like. Being over someone, he’s always lying on her, yet she hadn’t thought about it more than him finding greater comfort in holding her than her holding him.

ノ

Standing, languid fingers glide along the woman’s figure; tracing the front of her chest before turning to her left, her fingers continuing downward. Resting beside her rib, her fingers softly press against the ruby-colored strokes of her stomach and eventually hips. Her lips press to a narrow line, tightening as her eyes hood. Soon, she begins to feel the water droplets of her hair continue their constant descent down her skin, further dampening the wet skin. Combining through the moist hair, she pouts further, twisting the metal tap as frigid water begins to pour through the facet. Cupping the liquid, she brings the water closer to her face, closing her eyes as the water drips onto the top of her lashes. Sighing indolently, her head lifts once again but now to cup her cheeks, swallowing softly as she does so. Making her way back to their bedroom, she, in an awful attempt at being quiet, steadies her hands before crawling over to the now-sleeping Alec. Shifting to a lying position as the bed creaks, she lowers herself down to face him, tensing as her hair sticks to the back of her arms and her well, back. She visibly softens, staring up at the man before her lingering gaze softens. Leaning into him, she takes his dormant hand, wrapping it over her waist and bottom of her back. Closing her eyes, she leans the smallest bit forward, their foreheads only a few inches apart.

ノ

Shifting uncomfortably on the rigidly soft mattress, she lies half-reclined as she constantly looks around the room, as if she’s searching for something or rather; someone. Her gaze blankly lingers towards the empty cot just to her left. Her gaze is soon shifted as Alec first creaks the door almost frowning as he searches for his wife, his face then turns to elated, smiling as he approaches her. He wastes no time, unfolding his hands as he holds her hands together with an underline of endearment, further softening his smile as he pushes her damped hair from out of her face and to her ears. She returns the affection by lifting her head as he leans to her,smiling into their kiss. She pulls away with a content sigh, staring back at the man as she tightens the grip he has on her fingers, for a brief moment she feels him stroking her cheek, leaning to kiss her again. His goals are soon interrupted as a midwife opens the door before briefly standing behind it, moving her hands to reposition whatever she seems to be holding.

“I’m sure the two of you are exited above all else”

She begins, smiling warmly as she the two, Cheryll nods, reaching to reunite t
the two's hands though she finds Alec’s hands now lie at his sides, making him appear almost reserved.

Approaching the two, she pushes aside strings of the infant’s hair and respositions her arms to face the couple. First handing the infant to his mother, she stands composed as Cheryll smiles softly, running her hand past his cotton clothing. It’s as if she can’t stop smiling, especially when she takes in his features; his tanned skin or how his cheeks look so soft and powdered. She lowers her head to kiss him, inhaling, he smells faintly of saffron, maybe even vanilla. Oppositely, Alec all but detaches from the exchange, unable to stare at the infant for any longer than a couple seconds before grimacing. His gaze rises to his wife, a part of him feels guilty knowing how happy she is and his disdain towards something who’s just been born. She turns to him, removing her attention from their son, she smiles as she picks the infant and ushers him over to Alec. He hangs between the two for a while, obviously, not wanting to hold the child though he can’t find himself to disappoint her, he takes the infant.

“Careful..remember how to hold him..”

She reminds him, her fear turning to relaxation as he maneuvers the infant between his arms, now cradling him as the boy pinches into the air, babbling softly. He feels even more suffocated, his lips straightening tighter more than he ever knew he could, breath hitching as he stares back at her, paying no attention to the infant. He returns his attention as his wife gives him a subtle glance to watch him, his discomfort is evident, he hopes she chalks it up to the discomfort of being a new parent instead of a general parent. He flinches his hand away as the boy tries grabbing it, biting the inside of his cheek. He raises his head as Cheryll clears her throat to speak, finding it much more comfortable to sit in the chair beside his wife instead of sitting. She peers over to the infant, smiling as she coos causing the infant to giggle. Alec’s grip falters, wanting to hand their son back to her, though before he can do so.

“He’s amazing, isn’t he? I love the name Daniel, don't you?”
ノ
Cradling the infant against her chest, her fingers trail to circle the small patch of toffee-colored hair that manages to stick out from above his forehead. She smiles softly as the boy coos, steadying his head as she lifts it, tying the front strings of his bonnet.
“Dear to me”
She smiles, trailing a finger down the bridge of his nose as she kisses the boy, her faint lip balm pressing to his skin. As she pulls, a nude-colored imprint on the fat of his cheek. Lifting the infant from the armpits, she babbles back to him, bringing her face closer to his. Stirring awake, she places the infant back to its original, secure place against her chest as Alec mumbles against her thigh.
Glancing over to him, her brow perks up as he reaches over her legs, grabbing at the glasses perched on their nightstand. Grabbing a hold of the glasses’ frame, he pulls the metal from the stand back to himself, smudging away some dust from the lenses. Readjusting the glasses onto his face, he raises to stare down at the infant, though with a considerable lack of bliss as seen with his wife.
“He’s cuter than I thought”
He struggles which, luckily, Cheryll takes this comment at face value, her attention clouded as she continues to fond over the child. Placing his hand where his head was just a few moments before, moving his affections to her neck, he kissed the soft skin before resting his head on her shoulder. Smiling only half, his hand strokes the infant’s cheek as Cheryll adjusts Daniel to reach his father.
ノ
Standing before the mirror, deft fingers brushing through her hair as the hair is constantly pushed to her shoulders, then to her back and finally above her head to place in a high bun. Moving her elbow to adjust the lingering strands of hair beside her temple, she knocks into the small container of flower-shaped candle wax, clattering loudly as it falls to the floor. Behind her, she can see Alec jolting awake, his eyes closing as fast as they’d opened. He rubs his eyes in a circular motion for a few moments, blinking blearily as his hands search for his glasses. He stares at her, lingering on the backs of her legs, appearing taller thanks to finally wearing the heels his mother had given her a few months earlier. She sighs, taking her hair down to once again tease and reposition as she’s constantly straightening out her blazer and accompanying skirt. Swinging his legs from over his side of their bed, he slowly approaches her from behind, raising a brow as she drops her hair back down and frowns into the mirror. His head, now resting on the low of her shoulder, dips to kiss the clothed skin as his arms wrap over her waist.

“I’m feel so.. overwhelmed”

She confesses, her voice tightening, almost defeated as he continues to kiss her shoulder, swaying with an opposite of tenderness to her irritation. He pauses, focusing on her in the mirror and as she drops her head, pouting.

“I think your hair looks nice like that”

He compliments her, almost whispering as he turns to move a portion of her hair from off her shoulder and behind her, smiling softly as he does so.

“I don't like how it looks”

Her head remains drooped, her eyes searching the floor before Alec coaxes her head forward, his fingers stroking her chin as she borders on just about to cry and calling it a day.

“Why are you up so early? I thought you enjoyed sleeping in”

He questions blankly, absently toying with her tousled curls, as she picks at her nails, the newly-applied burgundy polish having been scraped and scuffed, especially around the edges.

“I start work today,I miss it. We need more money”

She said softly, her voice tinged with sullenness as she continued playing with her nails,dragging her eyes to the mirror.

“I can pick up more shifts”

He responds with the same softness, though she feels it more as insistence than a genuine offer; she’d decided to quit her job following the birth of Daniel as she’d assumed they’d share the load of his caretaking. She’d been wrong.

She interjects, taking a moment to pause as she shakes her head in disapproval. Her fingers run over her metal wedding band, biting her lower lip as she stares at, instead of them together, him.

“Can you..Could you take Daniel to the beach?”

She asks, almost regretting her request by the time she asks for it. His affection has always been limited, she’d be more than convinced to believe she’s the only person to see his hair down since they married if someone had asked. Unfortunately, his paternal affections follow suit, she knows or rather, hopes he loves Daniel even a half as much as she does. Or, rather, enough for him to conceal his disdain for the boy at least so that she’s unaware.

“I was supposed to come with him, I feel guilty”

She sighs, fixing her lighter-colored overblouse’s collar and cuffs. As she continues staring at herself, turning her head to the side to better grasp her hair and outfit. She looks up at him, her brows lowering as he hesitates, opening his mouth though there’s no words to be said.

“Sure, I’ll take him”

She notices him swallowing thickly as he assures her, wanting to make up some excuse how he now has work on Saturdays and Daniel should just stay home while he goes out. He’s almost dreading the next couple of hours, though, his dread is quickly erased when Cheryll moves her head up to kiss the side of his face.
ノ
Periodically scooping up heaps of sand, diligently reshaping and indenting into the now-wet sand the boy smiles at his *sand* castle. Dumping another pile of sand into his pail, Daniel grabs the newly poured sand and continues building on his creation.
Somewhat pleased, he turns over his shoulder where, rather reluctantly, Alec has been half-watching Daniel and half reading through his Dickens novel.

“Dad, wait, look!”

He’d called out rather eagerly, raising his voice with each tone to attract the man’s attention. Who, merely shifted in his chair, far from subtlety avoiding Daniel’s cries by trying to sound out the boy’s cries. Briefly, his words blur, as Alec shifts away from Daniel and closer to the more empty side of the beach. He closes his eyes, rolling his head further on the beach chair, savoring the gentle swish of his hair as he takes a few soft breaths. He fails, opening his eyes and keeping his eyes on the sun above him before turning his head to stare at Daniel as he’s all but screaming for his attention.

“What?”

He interjects, clearly disinterested and irritated, reflecting on the millions of things he could better spend his time doing than
taking Daniel to a well-crowded beach with hundreds of obnoxiously loud strangers. He, internally, sighs as Daniel points to the castle and rather loudly exclaims how much time he’s been devoting to improving his sand castles. Alec mutters a faith ‘uh huh’ wanting desperately to return back to his book. Unfortunately, he’s not granted such a pleasure.

"Look at what I made!"

He gestures, smiling as he impatiently awaits his father’s reaction. His cheeks almost hurt from how much he’s been smiling, but it's all worth it as Alec finally turns his head.

“I’ll look at your sandcastle when I’m finished reading,”

He says, paying it less than a half-glance, as he rolls his eyes as his fingers lazily flick through his book’s page. None to his care, Daniel pouts at his rather blunt indifference. Glued to the book, as if it was pulling him to it, he returns to blocking out those surrounding him, most notably Daniel. Finally, he breaks away from the book, opting to have it lay on his lap as his head is craned back, settling in the now-quiet he’s managed to grant himself. God, why couldn’t she have been here instead, he would’ve been enjoying himself a dozen times more even if the two just laid on their beach chairs for the next couple of hours. It’s almost perfect, almost. He’s sitting for only a few minutes, or what he thinks is a few minutes. That’s until he feels a rather insistent tap on his shoulder, he shrugs the contact off before sighing to open his eyes.
It’s Daniel, sniffling as he plays with his hands, Alec frowns at this disturbance, wanting to wave the boy off until he sees a small platter of blood on his hand.

Shit.

ノ
Kneeling by his beside, her hands run over his cheeks as she attempts to console the pouting boy, his tears drip onto her buttoned blouse as she whispers for him to calm down. She keeps trying to calm him down, obviously it fails, in doing so her patience grows thin with heightened desperation.
She promises to buy him the insect enclosure he’s been pestering her and Alec for months now, just anything to calm him down for a few seconds. A faint couple of kooks are heard from the door, quickly drowned by the insistent cries of Daniel as he clings onto her shirt. Alec creeks through the other side, shifting between his feet as he calls for her, discomfort clouding his features while he asks for the two of them to talk. Sighing, she stands to pull away from him, she kisses his forehead, trying to soothe his tears as she mentions she’ll be out of his room to speak with his father for a few moments. Turning to no longer face him, she sighed, trying to gain any semblance of composure she’d had from crying from when she’d called out of work to when she’d opened the front door.
As her back settles on the door, her closed eyes open with clear ire, her frown digging into his skin, clenching the sides of her skirt to compose herself.
“I can’t believe you”
She murmurs, in both disbelief and decry, she wishes he’d say something, anything she knows he’s not sorry; he never is. He only seems sorry when she’s sad. If he hadn’t called her while sitting in the ambulance she’s sure she would’ve thought Daniel scraped his knee and Alec couldn’t stop him from crying. His brows lower from somewhat apoplectic to pity..for himself.
“I asked you to look after him, I thought was a simple task”
She pauses, turning her head so that she can’t see him directly.
“But, clearly, I was asking for too much”
She adds.
Taking note of how Alec has now stopped shifting from each foot, standing stoic. He steps closer to her, scrunching his face up as he points a finger in the direction of her chest.
“It’s not my fault Daniel got cut. I didn’t plant glass, I didn’t cut him, yet you’re still blaming me”
He crosses his arms, his nails sinking into his shirt’s fabric while he bites the inside of his cheek. Her back straightens, standing taller as her lips press together in an unsteady line.
“I simply told you to watch him for a few hours, and you can’t even do that”
She retorts, staring offhandedly at the floor beneath the two of them. Her breath hitches as he scoffs underneath his breath, rolling her eyes, she moves from behind him towards their dining room table. Settling on the cushioned wood, her nails snake through her hair and behind her ears, rubbing her temples.
“I wish we could have one day without arguing”
She mutters, looking up at him before placing her arm on the table, as the other props her head up.
“You think I like arguing with my wife two feet away from the kid?”
His brows furrow, rolling his eyes as he places his front hand on the table, a few inches from her arm as he leans just above her.
“Could’ve fooled me”
She shoots back, huffing up the loose strands of hair which falls from her forehead and into her eyes.
Her gaze softens, roughly pouting as she uses her now free-hand to trace circles into the table’s wood with her nail. She turns to him, hesitating on what to respond with as she stares off to the side, deciding she cannot currently face him she returns her focus to the table.
“You can’t even act like you like him.”
She says quietly, or well, quieter than their exchanges had been before; words she’d been sure Daniel had, regrettably, heard, even if they lacked proper context.
“Excuse me? I love Daniel, sure he is more..garrulous than I’d like but–”
Her words falter as she opens her words to speak, biting her lip to stop the thin line of tears falling from her eyes. Wiping the assortment of black and tear tears from her cheeks,her mascara smudging even more than it already has, she eventually decides to speak to him.
“But do you like him?”
She trembles, finally staring at him, clearly; she watches as his eyes widen, before narrowing as he processes the question. His eyes roll, irritated at such nerve, and truthfully, such bluntness. In an almost laughable contrast to this revelation, she allows her tears to free-fall as he walks away from her. She hears his tennis-shoes scuffle against their creaky staircase, shutting the room to what she assumes to be their guest room.

ノ
“Do you forgive me?"
He asks, almost hesitant as he knows the answer and expects her snarky response. Instead, she stops herself from speaking, deciding to give him the answer he desires passive-aggressively. Grimacing, she continues dressing herself, if hastily, her enamel earrings contrasting with her caramel-colored skirt suit.
"You’ve stopped wearing your contacts”
He observes, walking over to her right, placing his hand just inches from her’s. Flashing a glance to his hand, she allows him to hold his hand with her’s.
"I like wearing glasses”
She replies, defensively scrunching up her fingers around the back of his hand.
"I’m taken with more sophistication”
She adds, her hands trembling as she attempts to weave each of her blazer’s buttons through their respective holes. Quickly and frustratingly pulling her hands from the woven fabric
"I take you seriously, is that not enough?"
His head dips, taking another step towards her back as his hands move over her chest, slipping each of the buttons into their hole as her breath hitches.
"It’s not whether you take me seriously…even that, I find hard to believe”
She spits, turning her head to the floor, and before his brow can get any higher and he can comment, she adds.
“I know my colleagues look down on me. I don’t want them to think of me as inferior”
She sighs, turning her head to the floor as his hands wrap over her stomach to tighten her matching belt, a thin strip of leather with a hardened-wooden circle in the middle.

"You sound histrionic"
Her hands rest over each of the belt’s sides, frowning as she turns to the side, examining her outfit.
"I shouldn’t have told you,"
She mutters, as Alec’s brows lower together, the pads of his thumbs tracing circles into her blazer.
"You shouldn’t have told me that you feel pejorative?"
He retorts, his disbelief evident as he scoffs, lowering his hands from her waist.
"It’s different for corporate”
Her voice softens, feeling Alec’s hands solemnly slip down to her as she moves to the opposite side of the mirror, retrieving her hanging swing.
“It pains me I couldn’t take off for Daniel’s injury"
She sighs, pulling the coat over her shoulders, her fingers trailing down to her sleeve, peeling the fabric back, revealing its harlequin interior.
"Cheryll, I’m sorry"
He persists, as she finishes her wardrobe, her hand slightly shuddering when slipping her bracelet on. She turns to him, her gaze looking past him, taking a step back as he tries reaching forward to grab her hand.
"I’m going to drive Daniel to school"
ノ
Creaking open, Alec pushes the front door open with the side of his shoulder, revealing his crumpled undershirt, its vest having been forgotten. Jerking up, Cheryll tips her half-empty cup of sangria all over their woven table cloth. She pinches the corners of her eyes, wiping away the rheum. She stands, her hands steadying the rest of her body as she sits from the chair, staring as he sluggishly tosses off his jacket.
“Where have you been? I was worried, Alec”
She presses as he ignores her, striding past her and heading towards their fridge. Stepping between the two, Cheryll treads closer to him, watching as he pulls his bag back to his shoulder. Walking faster, she catches up to him just enough for her to pull at the bag’s side, stopping his slow walk.
"Let go of it, Cheryll!”
He snaps, tugging the bag closer to him, in their struggle Cheryll looks over to him, pouting and pulling the bag closer to her. Suddenly, an empty cigarette case slips from the bag, giving a soft ‘thud’ as it falls to the ground.
"Oh”
She whispers, her eyes widen as the heel of his shoe presses to the box, crumbling. Alec, staring at the crushed box, silently walks towards Cheryll’s spilled drink placing his bag on top of the table. Turning to the refrigerator as Cheryll bends down to pick the crumpled box up, her nails tracing over the logo.
"You smoke?"
She asks, further rummaging through the bag, mostly sorting through books and files before feeling around the bottom of the bag. Alec, who’s hand now rests on the open refrigerator door.
"Your contract for…Adventure Camp?"
Flipping through the stack of paper, he hears her silently gasp, his grip on the refrigerator tightening as he retrieves a bottle of cognac from the far back.
"I thought you’d be asleep”
He says blankly, reaching to the cabinet for a cup, focusing more on his precision in getting all of the alcohol into his cup than his wife’s soft cries.
"So this is where you’ve been?"
She presses, reading through all the legal terminology and stipulations, she stops after reading what he’ll earn if he wins..one million dollars.
"It’s complicated"
He replies, finishing pouring the alcohol in his cup but instead of taking a sip he vacantly stares at the amber-colored liquid.
“I know finances are tight but…”
She trails off, reading over the prize money for the fifth time now, the words becoming jumbled with each re-read.
"I’m doing this for the two of you. Will you understand?”
He shit back, reaching forward to grab his glass, his fingers trailing over its intricate indents.
"I don’t want my husband to be more absent than he already is."
She speaks up, shoving the stack of papers back into the bag.
"I already signed the papers”
He replies, turning his head slightly, tensing once more as Cheryll’s hand covers her mouth.
"What?"
She holds onto the table, looking over at his back, her lips tightening.
"I signed them at the studio”
He reiterates, raising the glass to take a sip, pulling the cup away as the bitter liquid hits his tongue.
"How long were you going to keep this from me?"
She presses, when Alec doesn’t respond she considers walking over to him, stopping herself as her hand leaves the table.
“How long until you leave?”
She asks, hoping he decides to answer her rather than shutting down as he does in almost every one of their arguments.
“Three weeks”
Her eyes widen, but instead of staring to his back she stares down to the floor, moving her hands back to the table for stability.

“I’m going to be sick”

She places a hand over her stomach, stumbling backwards as she moves away from their kitchen and towards their bathroom. Alec’s grip jerks against the class of brandy, running his free hand through the right side of his hair as he hears Cheryll retching in their bathroom.

ノ

Cheryll, lying across their mattress, she feels herself sinking; it’s different than the other times, her lying idly unable to move, how she doesn’t want to move. Amidst her sulking, their bedroom door creaks slightly open, with Alec peering out from the door’s other side. He doesn’t say anything, unsurprisingly. Their recent conversations consist of her coming home to the supper he’d made for her and Daniel stored in the fridge as he lies in bed or him away God who knows where for God knows how long. Sometimes, the nights he isn’t out until midnight, she catches him staring at her, and sometimes she’ll stare back at him until she either lays down to sleep or to check on Daniel.
It’s neither of these nights, well, not as lonely as when she waits for him to come home or reciprocates their glances. She watches as he sits himself to the front of the bed, she considers making a brief remark on how long he decided to waste his time at the bars before coming home. She watches as he undresses, unbuttoning the front of his shirt before shrugging it from his shoulders. He digs around in his pocket, retrieving his lighter and accompanying half-full cigarette container. From where she lies she can only see the flame’s glow and the cigerette’s smoke. Pulling herself up from her dormant position, she moves over to him, her head resting on his upper back. Her hands move over him, the left snaking up his forearm with her fingers resting on his outer wrist, just inches from the cigerette’s butt.
“I don’t want you to leave, promise me that”
She whispers as he takes another drag, her right arm moving over his chest with her grip clinging onto his shoulder. Taking another drag, he tilts the cigarette away from her hand, tensing as her head leans against his temple. Tightening her arm over him, imperceptibly, as if she was encouraging him to stay here; stay in the idleness that is their marriage.
“You know I can’t promise you anything”
He sighs, blowing out more smoke, closing his eyes as her grip on him falters. He doesn’t want to go, he’s sure none of the contestants really do; but he needs this money. When he wins for the two of them they’ll move far from England, to Lisbon or Santorini or even Bodrum back in Turkey. He can almost picture it, he knows it won’t be until another two months. Weirdly, he doesn’t feel excited, it’s just something that’ll happen then it won’t; his win anyway. He knows Daniel, with his constant pestering, while Cheryll is off at work will surely bug his Mother similarly. He’ll tell the kid when his departure-date is closer, he knows it’s selfish but it’s for his own good. All he has to do is win, it’ll all be worth it then.
ノ
Watching as the other campers are handed their letters, he half-hopes for Cheryll have not written something to him, she’s probably still mad about him leaving so abruptly — he can’t say he blames her. Unfortunately, he’s wrong as her letter very obviously stands out — the envelope laid instead of cardstock as he vividly remembers her complaining about the ‘matte’ texture and insisting laid was the best and only way for letters. He sighs, he knows what it’ll be, wishing him luck and asking how he’s doing. Or well, that’s what he expects, just by sighing and taking in the letter’s length he quickly backtracks — what condolence letter takes up a whole side..? Twice.

“It’s much too quiet now that you’re gone, it’s almost ironic; I always knew you as the more..reserved one in our relationship,but without your sardonic-like attitude it feels like I'm missing something. It’s strange how much space you could take, and maybe, I’ve taken it for granted.
I’ve tried watching you really, but, with his practices and work calling me more than ever I haven’t enough time to watch you. It’s surreal, if anything, you feel so far-away, I don’t even know which country you’re in but I hope..no— I know you’re doing great. I’m proud of you, I'm sure, if I asked him Daniel would be too. I know you’re trying for us,but you should keep your options open..there’s only one of you who can win, so don’t close yourself off. Keep your options open, and don’t let anyone get in your head too much.

Daniel, I mean, I know how the two of you are but I think he’s taken your absence harder than even I have. If you could, could you ask one of the hosts to write to him, or even me? I’m tired of feeling one-sided, and I know there’s at least a few more weeks before you come back home, it’ll be nice to see how you are.

And, another thing, I feel the days are longer, sometimes the nights even more so. With you gone, I’ve had more time to think about him and our marriage. Alec, I should write this before I decide to chicken out; love you—I always have and I probably always will. But, ever since he got older, it feels like I’ve been dropping glass after glass, hoping the next one won’t break when I know it will.
It’s not fair to me or to you to stay like this when I know it won’t get any despite all your attempts to salvage everything.

I’m sorry, I know how much of a horrible wife I seem writing your only letter from home complaining about our shitty marriage. But I really want you to play for yourself, you don’t have to play to buy us some new house or more us all the way to Chichester. You should play for yourself, I won’t leave you, or at least not until you get back. I love you, Alec

Ever yours, Cheryll”

ノ

This might be the most humiliating-embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to him, getting outsmarted by a girl who he’s had to tie shoes for because she doesn’t know how. It’s all he thinks about getting driven to the motel, staying at the motel and especially on the plane and riding back to England. He doesn’t have many regrets; his only two being his decision to leave his beautiful wife and, well Daniel and having his only stable allies being an insecure girl with obvious parental issues and a precocious six year old. He should’ve bet on the pariah of her family, at least he could convince her to share any money she’d manage to win. Luckily, he supposes, neither of them had won the money; he definitely wouldn’t have shared hell if Ellie won she wouldn’t have shared. Tugging his luggage behind him, wishing he’d had called Cheryll to pick him up from the airport though he wouldn’t want to disrupt his wife’s sleep. His keys click against the keyhole, jingling a few times as he has to twist the set half a dozen times, finally opening he steps into an almost perfect replica of their living room as he’d left it. If he can squint, he can still see Daniel’s cricket competition photos and his various illustrations of bugs. The hallway is less..cluttered, with most of their photos having been taken off the wall, only a few pictures of Alec and Cheryll before Daniel and the few times they were allowed peace following his birth.

“Cheryll?”

He calls from the hallway, he knows she can’t hear him, but he hopes she’d gotten his calls that he’d be coming back home in a few hours. He’s not too positive with this either, they weren’t allowed communication outside of the show unless you count the five or so phone calls he had to watch the other team give or the letters they got only once. He hopes she’d send more to him, he’s sure they’d be back home if he didn’t receive them whilst playing. He creaks their bedroom door open, frowning at the lack of Cheryll’s distinct figure lying against their bed, her legs pressed against her chest had her hair laying around her. Finding, or rather the lack of finding her, he walks over to Daniel’s room where he’s met with the same emptiness. His room lacked the abundance of drawings or championship medals, even the stuffed bear he’d got the boy on his sixth birthday was missing. He calls out again, looking past the door frame, maybe she’d woken her and the kid up to meet him back at the airport.

“Cheryll?

He calls again, his hands patting down the sides of his pants to find his likely dead phone. Luckily, it has enough battery left for him to make three or four calls if the other two fail. He clicks her contact, ringing for a few seconds before beeping with the automated lady declairing the number unavaliable. He tries again,then again,then again. Unavaliable.

ノ
Fingers working to the back of her hair, polished-chipped nails running over the ends of her bobby pin as she finally unfastens the clasp and unravels her hair. Allowing the umber locks to cascade down her shoulder and back as she secures the door only with a gentle click, her shoulders slump, losing the significant weight of her weekender as it’s tossed onto the plush sofa. Cursing to herself as she shifts the few clumps of hair on her back to rest along her shoulders. As she walks, lacking a purpose and seeming as if her legs are all about to give out, her heel catches the collared sleeve, her steps falter as she tries kicking the shirt off. When that fails, she opts to leaning and physically removing the shirt, she runs her tongue over the first half of her lower-lip when she kneels, clutching the shirt’s sleeves as she stares at it with a sense of disdain; loathing. Tossing the shirt, back-side up and back to the floor, she kicks the shirt behind her when walking away from it then to Daniel’s room. Creaking softly as she enters, pressing her hands to the door’s backside, peering over to check if he’s even awake. Fortunately, he seems to have recently awakened, as noticed by the way he rubs his eyes and picks at his lashes. As she approaches his bedside, he hastily rises from his lying position to sitting up, his fingers tapping his blanket as she turns to smile. Her features soften, almost as on cue, as she gestures her arms for him to embrace her, pearching beside him. Enveloping him, she rests her head against his hair, closing her eyes with a long sigh as she smiles when pressing a kiss to the top of his head. Stirring as the two hug, she opens her eyes, her breath catching in her throat as she stares down at the boy. Pulling back, the pads of her fingers trace his cheeks and their bones, as she rests her forehead against his.
“I’m so happy to see you, my baby”
She smiles, moving down to kiss his cheek as she’s in the process of sitting up. She pulls him up by his hand, his knees settling on the comforter as she runs a hand through his hair. She smiles again, softer, though, as she ushers him back to his pillows and headboard. Turning her back towards him as she makes her way to his door. He pouts as she leaves, clutching onto his stuffed bear as she retreats to the door, watching him lay down as she reluctantly removes herself from the room and into the hallway. As her fingers linger on the door’s
knob, her jaw clenches as she debates whether she should head to bed or finish her work; she decides on neither.
Moving towards the kitchen, her heels click against the shaky wood, approaching the kitchen as she scuffles with removing her cardigan. Moving towards the refrigerator with much more vigor, her nails now scraping against the wood, nearly throwing herself to the fridge’s handle. There’s not much left, only a few pre-prepared boxes of kashk and rice for Daniel’s lunch and miscellaneous sauces. She makes a note to herself, she thinks of looking around for any paper for her to hang to remind herself to shop, she’s sure Daniel will remind her anyway. Taking one of the semi-clear binsakao glasses from the double-tiered cup holder, accompanied by an almost empty bottle of brandy which she takes quickly to pour. Her hands quiver from the moment she grabs the glass to when she’s finished pouring the rest of the amber liquid into her cup, almost overflowing. She’s much more cautious walking back, she steps with more precision as she returns back to the sofa. Before she can sit, her shoe is caught once again in the shirt, this time, though, she successfully trips over the fabric. Her glass, slipping from her grasp and shattering onto the floor beneath her as she instinctively moved her leg to kick the shirt back off, finds herself stuck.
Frustratingly, she kicks her back heel off, the left, as she almost collapses onto the sofa. Moving her ankle up to more gently take off the remaining heel, cursing to herself as she runs a hand through the front of her hair. Eventually dropping to the floor, her gaze fixates on the now stained and glass-filled shirt beneath her. With trembling fingers she grabs the shirt, bringing it to her nose as she searches for some semblance of satisfaction, relief even. She can’t find it, a studio flat brings something far from relief, even as she’s reflecting on the man she both hates more than anyone she’s ever known and, unfortunately, can’t stop herself from thinking about. Her breath hitches, her knuckles digging harder into the fabric as it becomes damp once again, though not with alcohol but with tears.
ノ

Alec stared at his phone, the screen illuminating his face in the dim light of his living room. With a deep breath, he pressed the call button, the tension in his chest tightening as he listened to the ringing. Finally, he heard her voice message—a soft, slightly hesitant tone that declared she had one new message waiting. He grimaced, mentally preparing himself, and finally decided to suck it up and press "answer."

When Cheryll picked up, her voice was laced with surprise. “I didn’t think you’d actually call me,” she said, her tone tentative. There was a pause, and Alec could almost visualize her shifting in her seat, perhaps fidgeting with a glass in her hand. “I thought you’d still be mad at me,” she added, followed by a soft sigh. He could hear the faint clink of her glass against the table, a sound that echoed the tension in the air.

Alec snickered lightly, trying to mask his own irritation. “Well, it’s hard not to be,” he replied, his voice steady but edged with frustration. He could picture her rolling her eyes, the way she always did when he brought up the past. “Honestly, I just wish you'd at least apologize,” he added, his tone softer now, hinting at the hurt beneath his words.

The silence on the line stretched, and he could almost feel her contemplating her response. Finally, she spoke, her voice firm yet weary. “Alec, I can only be sorry for so much, but this isn’t one of them.” Her words hung heavy in the air, and he could sense the walls she had built around herself.

Moments ticked by, the silence growing thicker, until Alec broke it. “You know,” he said, his voice dropping to a near whisper, “sometimes I miss you so much I can hardly stand it.” The confession hung there, raw and vulnerable, and he held his breath, waiting for her reaction.

Cheryll inhaled sharply on the other end, the sound a mix of surprise and something deeper—regret, perhaps. But before he could decipher her emotion, she hung up, leaving him staring at the screen, the call abruptly cut off. He felt a mix of longing and frustration, the weight of unspoken words lingering in the silence that followed.

ノ

“I’m leaving. I have a new job offering”

She states, shakily firm as her fingers twirl over the spiraled cord, tapping absently on the wooden answering machine.

“What?”

He replies, more as a statement than a question, clutching his phone as he lifts himself off the sofa.

“I kept asking you if you could see him; you keep saying no”

She clarifies, two of her fingers tightening on one of the cord’s swirls as she leans further into the counter.

“So you decided to leave, again?”

His jaw tightens, gripping the sofa’s now torn upholstered arm. His gaze flickers to the quarter-full beer bottle, deciding to lay back onto the sofa and continue in drinking away whatever argument he was regrettably reflecting on.

“I told you multiple times I didn’t want you going to that..that show, but you kept saying you knew what you had to do”

She says in a hushed whisper, as she ties her hair back, some of its strands unwilling to remain in their messy bun. Her voice narrows, fingers tracing over each of the counter’s thick lines.

“..Was leaving your family something ‘you knew you had to do?’”

She asks blankly, she knows she won’t get a clear, let alone true answer out of him; but she feels glad just as much as she’s saddened by the fact she can’t see him physically think of an excuse.

“I told you my reasons, and I don’t seem to remember you proposing a better compromise.”

He replies, leaning his back just against the plush sofa back so that he remains upright and can safely cradle his nearly overflowing cup of Guinness.

“I told you I could work full-time and you could quit your job to go watch him!”

He briefly takes a sip, raising his head to wipe his mouth with the backside of his hand as he places the phone beside the now empty bottle. Sitting open, one hand through the front of his hair as the other
remains shockingly steady around his cup.

“Why would I quit my job? You don’t even think I’m a good enough father”

Her eyes widen, stepping from the answering machine as the sides of her lips whip to a half-snarky half-shocked smile.

“You can’t be serious… you don’t even think of yourself as a good father”

Shifting from each heel, her head dips down as she makes a note to herself; ‘resew the hem of your blouse, buy Daniel another blazer and put off buying yourself a new wardrobe for the sixth time.

“I am trying; you know how hard… he was for me”

He replies in a hushed whisper, lowering his head to the phone’s screen, emptying his glass with a concerningly long chug and following clinking sound.

“You can’t keep trying if you don’t make any progress”

She cuts through the soft air, her tone considerably sharper as opposed to her just trying to keep her voice down so that her son can’t hear her screaming at his father.

“Where are the two of you going?”

He asks shakily, desperately wanting to know where in the hell was so important that the slim times he’d have even the chance of seeing Cheryll again? Even if it’s in court raising his alimony or child support..Daniel staying would be fine he supposes.

“Amsterdam”

She replies with the same lack of emotion, though now, trying her hardest not to walk away and wait for Alec to get the hint and hang up.

“I always thought you’d want to visit a beach-rich country”

He chuckles, biting on his lower lip, raising his hand to peel off the already flaking skin of his lips.

“Daniel can’t go to beaches, remember?”

She rolls her eyes, it’s almost insane how he can forget, block, the event of traumatizing his son from his memory but not every one of their petty arguments.

“I should go to sleep, it’s pretty late here”

She blatantly lies, if he remembered anything about her he knows she would always fall asleep hours after he would. And she knows, unfortunately, he’d fall asleep quite quickly with or without alcohol or cigarettes clouding up his system. Even if she’d drink herself to sleep, not to say she hasn’t done it before, falling asleep feels more like a chore than something mandatory. It’s weird, she can't decide whether she enjoys him being hundreds of miles away from her or is saddened by the fact nobody is there to comb through her hair or rest there on her upper thigh.

“Please, just call me about where..where you’re going okay? First thing in the morning”

She mutters an off-hand, ‘mhm’, almost immediately reaching to and closing the phone back to its holder. Briefly, she thinks of telling Daniel Alec had called but, knowing him, he’ll likely ‘forget’ of his plans to visit the two of them and it’s much less work to deal with no tantrum than calm Daniel down after who he’d been waiting for decided to cancel. She makes another note to herself; buy sticky notes, call Alec before working so that her colleagues don’t hear or God forbid see her crying in the bathroom (again).