Archive of Our Own

It's winter and Minseok doesn't like it, so he snuggles closer to Luhan in their small bed. He tugs the comforter up to his nose and Luhan side eyes him.

"I told you to wear clothes. The heater won't be running 'til next week." Minseok grumbles and buries his face in Luhan's chest,clearly defiant. Minseok isn't usually clingy but it's winter and clothes are bothersome when you can just jump on the bed naked and it's a free pass snuggle session with your hot boyfriend anyway.

Luhan sure doesn't mind despite his little reprimand. "I swear to God, Minseok. I can feel your dick against my thigh."

"Are you implying something, Lu?"

"Yes. Put some clothes on and go to sleep.” Minseok whines when Luhan gets out of bed to throw some boxers at him.

"Jeez, I have classes to sit through tomorrow, I don't want my ass hurting like hell."

"What if I let you top though."

"Ha-ha-ha, Kim Minseok," Luhan flops back to the bed, hitting Minseok in the ribs. "Tempting, but no thanks."

"People would kill to taste these guns." Minseok smirks, lifting up his hips to slide the boxers on himself.

"I don't know what you've eaten but you sound like that guy from Math class." Luhan curls up into his side of the bed and tries to drown out the uncharacteristically fussy Minseok behind him. “Good night.”

Minseok makes his way downtown to buy dinner, the usual monochrome color of the world still veiling his eyes. He hasn't found his soulmate yet and he's already half fifty. But it's more than enough for him. He doesn't really need a soulmate when Luhan is everything he could ever ask for.

He doesn't know why Luhan isn't his soulmate. They’re perfect for each other since day one.

He gets home a little early than usual, not expecting Luhan to be home and sitting in the middle of the living room with all the lights off.

"Hey, Lu. I got you some ramen for dinner," he says behind the kitchen counter, after setting down the food and things he has on the table, he makes his way to Luhan who seems a little dazed. "Are you okay?"

Luhan turns his head to him slowly, his eyes glassy and unfocused. "Minseok..." Luhan says, slowly reaching out to touch the other's face.

"I'm here, I'm here," he guides both of Luhan's hands onto his cheeks as he kisses each of Luhan’s palms. "Would you tell me what's wrong?"

“Colors Minseok. Colors, I—"

“Colors,” Minseok breathes.

They've never really talked about this in depth before and Minseok kind of guessed Luhan had never believed in this weird soulmate hullabaloo,since he had dismissed their previous conversation about this. They've never really discussed what they'd do if either one of them finds the person who will bring color into their lives.

Minseok fervently thinks they both believe in each other. That they both love each other even if they're not each other's painters.

"Luhan, it's okay." He pulls Luhan up from the floor, hauling him to the plush sofa.

"No, Minseok. I can see the colors now." There's a please don't leave me sitting on Minseok's tongue but he bites it back as he watches Luhan point out what color each item in the room is.

"Look Minseok, our couch isn't grey! I don't know what color this is but it's not some shade of black. And look at those flowers!" Luhan grabs them from the vase and hands it to Minseok.

"They're not black or white or gray. Well this one is, but the others are different! This is beautiful Minseok! Can't you see?" Minseok swallows down the lump forming in his throat. He can't. He can't because he hasn't found his soulmate yet, because Luhan isn't his soulmate, because the world is so cruel.

"I'm sorry Luhan." Is all he says when Luhan pulls him into a hug and kisses Minseok’s tears away.

"Oh no, Minseok. I didn't mean it that way." Minseok pushes him back by the hips to which Luhan retaliated with a tighter grip around Minseok’s back. “Minseok.”

"I’m okay. I think I just have a slight headache.” Minseok smiles a little crookedly, but his eyes seem tired. Luhan releases him, and he immediately made a beeline for the bedroom.

Luhan is going to leave Minseok.

Luhan is going to leave him because Minseok may love him with his whole heart but he isn't the one who painted Luhan's world with colors. The world is cruel.

"Do you believe in soulmates?" Luhan asks, head resting on Minseok's lap. They have a few hours 'til the coffee shop closes down but Minseok is nowhere near done with his term papers.

"Lu, we're practically color blind because of the soulmate thing." Minseok laughs, typing away on his laptop.

Luhan sits upright to look at him. "I don't."

Minseok stops and returns Luhan's look with a confused one. "And why don't you believe?"

"I think it's absolute rubbish. I mean, what does it mean when you're soulmates with someone? You get colors? But I've met people who are still in monochrome like us and they're happy. They're happy like us." Luhan stresses, holds Minseok's hand tight.

"I love you." Minseok blurts out, there's fear bubbling in the pits of his stomach and he wills it down by pressing their lips together.

Minseok gasps awake and immediately feels the dampness on his cheeks. He startles Luhan as well, and he sees the man had fallen asleep on a chair across their bed.

Luhan.

"Minseok, you're awake. Do you want some coffee?" Luhan asks, eyes groggy from sleep, body on autopilot, like Minseok didn't fuss last night. Minseok doesn't respond and Luhan slowly remembers, the ache of seeing Minseok crumbling and shattering "Minseok, I—" Luhan kneels on the bed, the blankets over his head now. "I won't leave you. Please, don't... don't be sad."

Minseok has half the mind to yank Luhan in for a hug, one where he wouldn't let the other go, where he'd drag him back under the covers for a whole day cuddling session maybe with some kisses. But Minseok stops himself from reaching out and instead he curls back into his usual spot on the bed and force himself back to sleep. He couldn't though.

"Minseok," Luhan calls for him again. "Minseok," every call increasing in tone and frustration.

"Minseok, I said I'm not going to leave you. Why are you acting like this?" Luhan jumps on the bed and that makes Minseok spring back up again and tackle Luhan down onto the mattress, pining the frustrated man underneath him. "Minseok." Luhan gasps, scanning the other’s face.

"I just don't know how to react to this, Luhan."

"Tip number one, don't ignore me." Luhan says, kissing the tip of Minseok’s nose.

"I'm serious—you—you've met your soulmate..."

"But I don't believe in that bullshit," Luhan says, his eyes crinkling into another one of his smiles. "I believe in you." And with that Minseok closes their distance, Luhan meeting him halfway into the kiss.

"I love you, I love you." Minseok says in between breathless chuckles and kisses. He means it, every syllable with its own intonation of sincerity and adoration.

"I love you too, Minseok. I love you so much."

"Hey Luhan." He calls maybe three hours later, both of them still cuddling, the morning breeze slowly turning hot.

"Yeah?"

"What's different? I mean with the colors now..." Luhan turns to face him, eyes scanning Minseok's serious face.

"Nothing’s different. You're still perfect."

It's only three weeks later when Luhan brings up his "painter". Minseok tries to look fine, well he is, Luhan had kept telling him he would never leave him despite him meeting his soulmate thing and all. "I'd like to introduce him to you. Don't look at me like that, do you want me to prepare an "I won't leave you" speech? Besides, he's totally not my type anyway," Luhan laughs, genuinely adding a soft smack.

"He's name is Sehun, a freshman. We've been hanging out, didn't I tell you?"

"You didn't,” Minseok frowns.

“Don't worry, all we talk about is which color is which. Trying to get this color thing sorted out." Minseok is still grumpily munching at his sandwich when a slender, pale faced kid sits across them.

"Sehun! You're finally here! Your jacket is red right? Am I right?" The kid—Sehun—laughs and nods at Luhan.

"Hey hyung." Sehun says and Minseok isn't sure if he's talking to Luhan or him, but maybe he's talking to him because Sehun's looking at him "Luhan hyung told me a lot about you."

Minseok glares at the man beside him. "I thought you said you only talked about colors?"

"Woops."Luhan feigns surprise, Minseok punching his arm playfully.

The two of them quickly get along nonetheless. Sehun's not a bad kid, random and a bit loud like Luhan, but manageable. They part ways after that, Luhan telling Minseok he'd do the groceries that day. "Just get the heater started at home. So I wouldn't have to press my palm against you just to warm myself up."
Minseok laughs, "You'd do that anyway."

"Shush, you." He earns a smack from Luhan on his chest.

"Okay, okay." Minseok presses a kiss on Luhan's crown and waves goodbye. He watches Luhan disappear in the sea of people before he turns to cross the road. The sign says walk, since the society isn't that inconsiderate to monochromatic people. Minseok strides as fast as he can among the crowd, anticipating a good dinner with Luhan tonight. Images of Luhan and Sehun back in the shop still lingering in his mind, they're compatible he thinks, smiling despite himself.

But soulmates aren't just about being in love, Minseok shrugs, rounding the corner with his hands in his pockets. There's a screeching noise behind him and he sees an apple truck swerving across the road, hitting a post. Everything blurs and Minseok sees a kid about to be hit by a car trying to avoid the wreckage and his adrenaline kicks in and he dashes to pull the kid out of danger.

In the split moment of eye contact, Minseok is temporarily blinded, head throbbing as he pushes the kid away. Red. Red is the first color Minseok sees before everything turns static black.