Chapter Text
The quiet hum of the forest cabin filled the air as Uzi lounged in a makeshift chair, her legs kicked up on a salvaged table. In her hand was a medium-sized battery, which she was casually munching on like a bag of chips. Each bite made a satisfying crunch as sparks occasionally flickered from the edges.
On the other side of the room, V leaned against the wall, her expression caught between mild amusement and outright revulsion. She still couldn’t quite wrap her head around the situation—sharing a roof with a scrappy worker drone who treated cohabiting with a murder drone like it was the most ordinary thing in the world.
“Okay,” V finally broke the silence, tilting her head, “what are you doing?”
“Eating,” Uzi replied casually, biting into the battery again, her tone betraying no sense of how strange this looked.
“Eating what, exactly?” V narrowed her eyes, shifting closer to get a better look.
“A battery. Duh,” Uzi said, holding it up like it was the most natural thing in the world.
“That’s disgusting,” V deadpanned, crossing her one arm over her chest. “Is this some weird worker drone thing?”
“No, it’s a drone thing,” Uzi replied, rolling her eyes. “Don’t tell me you didn’t know drones can eat snacks. What kind of isolated murder drone life have you been living?”
“Uh, the normal kind,” V shot back. “I run on oil and occasional repairs, not… random garbage you find lying around.”
“Pfft, random garbage?” Uzi smirked, tossing the battery into her mouth and crunching down triumphantly. “This is top-tier snack material right here. But, since you clearly have no taste, I guess I have to educate you.”
“Oh no,” V groaned as Uzi hopped out of her chair and rummaged through a small cabinet in the corner.
Moments later, Uzi returned, her arms laden with a bizarre assortment of items: small bolts dipped in golden lubricant, shards of scrap metal coated in shiny residue, and intricately twisted wires. She placed them on the table with the enthusiasm of a chef presenting a five-star meal.
“Behold!” Uzi declared, gesturing grandly. “The Uzi Snack Collection. Patent pending.”
V blinked. “You’re kidding.”
“Nope! Found most of these materials scavenging around the forest. Cleaned them up, added some special touches… they’re amazing word .” Uzi popped a spiraled wire into her mouth, chewing with exaggerated satisfaction. “Mmm, perfection!”
“Yeah, hard pass,” V said, wrinkling her nose.
“Oh, come on,” Uzi teased, grabbing a lubricant-dipped bolt and waving it in front of V’s face. “What’s the harm in trying one? Afraid you’ll actually like it?”
“I’m not afraid of anything,” V retorted, leaning back slightly. “I just don’t eat… whatever that is.”
“You’re missing out,” Uzi said, shrugging. She leaned back into her chair and munched loudly on another wire.
V’s processor whirred as she watched Uzi enjoy her snacks with genuine delight. She hated to admit it, but the worker drone’s enthusiasm was almost contagious. After a long pause, she sighed dramatically.
“Fine,” V muttered. “Give me one. Just one. And if it’s awful, I’m going to laugh at you forever.”
Uzi’s face lit up with an almost mischievous grin. “Deal.” She handed V a small shard of coated scrap metal. “Start with this one! It’s sweet and crunchy. Total game-changer.”
V eyed the shard suspiciously, turning it over in her hand. “This looks like it came straight out of a trash heap.”
“Only the finest trash,” Uzi said with a wink.
With a reluctant grimace, V brought the shard to her mouth and bit down. The first crunch was sharp and metallic, but then a strange sweetness spread through her sensors. It wasn’t… terrible. In fact, it was kind of nice.
“Well?” Uzi leaned forward expectantly.
“It’s…” V hesitated, scowling as her pride wrestled with honesty. “…not the worst thing I’ve ever tasted.”
Uzi burst out laughing. “I knew it! The mighty murder drone has a sweet tooth!”
“Don’t push it,” V growled, though her tone lacked real bite. She set the shard down but found her hand instinctively reaching for one of the lubricant-dipped bolts. She caught herself and quickly pulled back.
“Hey, no judgment,” Uzi said, grinning. “Take as many as you want. I’ve got plenty more recipes to show you.”
“Yeah, not happening,” V muttered, crossing her arm.
But later that night, as Uzi slept soundly in her corner of the cabin, V quietly snuck over to the snack stash. She grabbed a single twisted wire, chewing it slowly as she leaned against the window.
She would never admit it—not now, not ever. But maybe Uzi was onto something after all.