Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

He couldn't believe the shit situation he was now stuck in. He was crammed in a taxi with three other people he wasn't as thrilled to be around in such a tight space. Jyushimatsu couldn't sit still for shit on one side of him, Karamatsu smelled like three different colognes on the other side of him, and his grumpy father sat in the passenger seat with too much of an indifferent attitude. Him and his dumb luck to be stuck here in this moment. Was divorce really necessary?

“Do not fear, my dear younger brothers, as the oldest of us three, I shall make sure we all adjust to this transition of ours as smoothly as possible,” Karamatsu tried to assure him and Jyushimatsu as he wrapped his arm around them the best he could manage in the taxi.

“Yeah! This is going to be fun! CR New home!” Jyushimatsu cheered loudly, bouncing in his seat and waving his arms, smacking one of them into Choromatsu’s head.

“What does CR even mean? Jyushimatsu! Sit still! We still have another few kilometers till we get near the apartment complex!” Choromatsu huffed at Jyushimatsu, feeling too annoyed already. He wondered idly what the other three brothers’ drive was like to live with their Mother; Osomatsu probably would be making bad jokes, Todomatsu probably texting away while taking cute selfies of himself, and Ichimatsu probably quietly brooding and sitting as close to the window as he could. At least those three aren't as bad as Jyushimatsu and Karamatsu together.

“Quiet down, boys, I want to get there as painlessly as possible. I’m not your mother who lets you bicker among yourselves. Once you get to your room, then you can bicker but this nice taxi driver doesn't need to hear it from you three,” their father scolded them, glancing back only briefly. That didn't really end it for the brothers. Jyushimatsu still didn't sit still, Karamatsu still tried to act painfully as a big brother, and Choromatsu still felt annoyed he got cheated into being stuck with the two.

When they arrived to the apartment complex, Jyushimatsu carried most of the bags, Karamatsu took on a hefty load, and Choromatsu got what he could while their father held doors open for them. The apartment wasn't overly small, it was manageable with two bedrooms and two bathrooms at least. The kitchen was decent and the living room was fair size though there was a small sort of dining room. Upon inspecting the rooms, their father took the smaller room for himself since it was cozy while the three brothers had to share the master bedroom. With a husband and wife it wouldn't have felt so small, but with three brothers it felt cramped.

“I'm saying this now, we cannot let our stuff get mixed up. I really don't want things crazy and jumbled up like they were before,” Choromatsu sighed as he picked his bags out to put in a corner.

“Oh! Big brother! Do you want your porn?” Jyushimatsu asked loudly, holding up one of Choromatsu’s Neko-Chan bags. This made the green clad brother yelp loudly and make a reach for it and hide it away under his bags.

“Jyushimatsu! That's another thing! We have more space now! Let's keep it that way! I don't want to feel like I still gotta worry about one of you going through my things so thoughtlessly! We have space to ourselves now! Let's utilize it so long as we are away from those other three demons!” Choromatsu scolded with a flush of red on his space.

“Do not fear, my dear younger brother, I shall respect your space but do not fear about asking to go through my space,” Karamatsu hummed, putting his sunglasses on with a confident smile.

Choromatsu wanted to strangle him for being so painful even if that was actually a nice thing to say. It was just spite that made him feel annoyed. He wanted to be with his mother where the apartment would be warmer and the two he'd be stuck with would be decent to put up with. If he had only spoken before Ichimatsu, he could've easily won his mother over yet he hesitated and that criminal stole his final slot. Then again, Ichimatsu probably would murder Karamatsu in the taxi drive.

“Boys! I'm ordering pizza for us tonight!” their father called to them from his own room, making Choromatsu feel relief that there was a distraction, “What do you boys want?”

“Pepperonis, please!” Choromatsu answered, stepping out of the room and into the hallway.

“Pineapple! Pineapple!” Jyushimatsu hopped into the hallway, bouncing himself in a circle with his big smile.

“I am fine with anything,” Karamatsu answered from the bedroom as he put his bags in a corner of the room.

For the next half hour, all four men of the apartment unpacked the best they could for now. They didn't have much furniture on them at the moment as anything their father was able to claim would arrive next week. For now they hooked up the television and cable, plugged in basic kitchen appliances like the toaster and microwave, and put their clothes in the closet or left them in their bags. Pizza arrived in 30 minutes and they took a break to eat on the floor of the dining room with paper plates.

“You know, boys, I think we can make this work!” their father reassured them, giving a confident smile.

“Of course, we are powerful men who can overcome any challenge presented to us,” Karamatsu spoke with his usual confidence.

“Hahaha! I saw a spider on the window sill!” Jyushimatsu cheered, holding his pizza slice up happily.

Choromatsu looked at the three who deluded themselves that this would be ok. He had to get a job and home of his own soon or he’ll snap. He munched on his pizza and tried to picture how dinner with their mother was like right now. She probably went to the store to buy some vegetables and rice, probably making a nice dish for her precious babies. Osomatsu probably would gobble it all up quickly, Todomatsu probably would make snarky remarks about how brash Osomatsu could be when he eats, and Ichimatsu… Well he's probably silently enjoying the food. Choromatsu would kill not eat pizza that tasted like cardboard.

“I've actually been thinking, boys, that you all must find a way to contribute if you're going to live with me. I'll give you time, sure, but you are all adults. And frankly, I want to prove to your mother I'm the better parent,” their father said suddenly, catching all three’s attentions, “Jyushimatsu, you need to aim for one of those star league teams that can pay you. You've got the talent and I believe in you. Choromatsu, you can come to my work some time to see if you can intern or maybe see if your idol friend, Totoko, will still pay you to be her manager. And Karamatsu… Well, I think your best option is to marry someone with money and be a housewife or something…”

Choromatsu wanted to scream. Their farher’s faith in them felt so backhanded. Sure, it was nice that he thought they had a shot in hell, even Karamatsu had a chance somehow, but it was all to prove he can be a better parent. Well, then again spite is a great motivator. Choromatsu would love to rub it in Osomatsu’s face that he's been successful without his “help”.

“Either way, I want you boys to aim as high as you can manage. There's no reason you can't be better than the other three. You three perfectly parallel those other three but you can be better with me being your caretaker! Jyushimatsu, Ichimatsu is your challenge. Ichimatsu is strong and can probably take a man out if he gotta. You ought to aim to be the strongest baseball player on the field! Choromatsu, Todomatsu is your challenge. Your younger brother has you beat for already having a job. You have to aim for the job that gets you the bigger paycheck or the most fame. And Karamatsu, Osomatsu is your challenge. Osomatsu is funny and smart in what to gamble for. He’ll probably grow up to be a gold digger and you have to find the more successful spouse. Together, we can all achieve these goals! We have to show we are the ‘A’ team!” Their father tried to inspire them but Choromatsu had to question the blunt honesty of it all.

The middle brother was more than happy to finish dinner and head to the bath house. It gave a breath of fresh air even if he had to go with his brothers. At least they could agree that it was nice to end the day with a bath. Though, none expected them to see the other three there, too. It felt odd and out of place as the three watched their other brothers bicker in front of the bath house.

“Big brother, I can't believe you ate so much! What happened to leaving some of it for lunch tomorrow?” Todomatsu whined as the three brothers were walking up to the bath house.

“Relax, we can have some more tomorrow if we ask Mom!” Osomatsu shrugged, giving a casual shrug as he opened the door to the bath house.

“Hey… Isn't that…?” Ichimatsu spoke up, pointing to Choromatsu and the other two brothers who stood awkwardly. The eldest and youngest brother glanced over to where he pointed and made a split moment decision to pull themselves inside quickly along with Ichimatsu.

“Those pricks…” Choromatsu mumbled and pulled Jyushimatsu and Karamatsu inside the bath house quickly after.

“My little brother, I think we shouldn't let them bother us. We should enjoy ourselves tonight and bask in the comfort of the waters to celebrate our successful new beginnings,” Karamatsu spoke up as the trio moved to the locker room.

“You know what, Karamatsu, you're right. Let's completely ignore them and enjoy a good bath,” Choromatsu decided, looking back at his older brother briefly. It was an odd thought to put Karamatsu as now the eldest brother in their house but there he was, pulling himself to take charge. Choromatsu forgot how often the second eldest just followed the lead of the eldest sextuplet.

The three of them got changed out of their clothes and secured them away with ease as they ignored the pestering voices on the other aisle of the lockers. It felt like it was a challenge to ignore the other three’s existence completely. Choromatsu at least to joy in relaxing in the bath waters. It felt nice and spacious to only share with two others rather than five others; Jyushimatsu had room to swim back and forth with his big smile and Karamatsu didn't sit so close to him.

Though, that peace ended quickly when the devilish trio entered the same bath waters as them. However, there was a clear margin between the two houses now.

“Osomatsu, didn't you think mother’s cooking was spectacular today? She made such a nice chicken meal for us tonight!” Todomatsu started, speaking up to be sure the other three heard him perfectly.

“Oh yeah, I loved it! She made us chicken, vegetables, and rice! It was so warm and nice! She's such a master chef!” Osomatsu joined him in the egging on. It was so painfully obvious that they were hoping to get the other trio jealous.

“Jyushimatsu,” Choromatsu refused to look at the devilish trio, “Dad is really inspirational on making sure we become better people, right?”

“Yeah! Dad said you can get a job that makes more than Totty!” Jyushimatsu nodded, making Choromatsu proud that Jyushimatsu went for a direct hit, he could practically hear Todomatsu grind his teeth.

“Ichimatsu, didn't Mom say that you can get a pet cat now that we don't have as much high maintenanced deadweight as we used to?” Osomatsu spoke nonchalantly, making a direct stab that Choromatsu knew hit Karamatsu hard.

“Karamatsu, I agree with that dad you can find yourself a hot and successful spouse. You don't even need to make lame and tactless jokes like most gold diggers. You can actually play an instrument and dress like you care about your appearance. You don't have a beer belly or anything,” Choromatsu spoke, feeling odd that he was now having to talk up his brother who usually was a pretty good punching bag.

“I think I won't murder you two in your sleep,” Ichimatsu spoke bluntly as though that was a compliment.

“My dear brothers, as your big brother you can feel assured that I will make sure you both achieve your dreams because I believe in you,” Karamatsu spoke confidently, giving Choromatsu and Jyushimatsu a thumbs up till Ichimatsu finally broke the barrier to grab the second eldest by the shoulders tightly to glare directly at him.

“Ichimatsu! Quit that! You can't murder in front of witnesses!” Todomatsu huffed and splashed bath water at Ichimatsu to get his attention. This prompted Jyushimatsu to splash Todomatsu right back with a gleeful laughter. It did get Ichimatsu to let go but that didn't stop Osomatsu from flicking water Choromatsu’s way, either.

“Hey! Why are you splashing at me? I'm trying to enjoy myself here!” Choromatsu huffed at him.

“Yeah with that stick up your ass. Come on, Fappymatsu, you've been digging at us this entire time! I'm just giving your a small reminder I'm still older than you!” Osomatsu laughed as though nothing he was saying was insulting or threatening.

“You're only older by a few hours! That's literally nothing, you know! Besides, Karamatsu is my eldest brother now in our house so you don't scare me,” Choromatsu huffed, trying to not let that tactless insult get to him.

“Oh? How's that going for you guys? Has big brother Karamatsu been any good for you all? He still looks painful like before,” Todomatsu butted in with a smug smile.

“Big brother said he's going to play baseball with me tomorrow!” Jyushimatsu nodded quickly. Choromatsu could see out of the corner of his eyes Ichimatsu glaring daggers at a painfully happy Karamatsu. It's like the man hasn't gotten defended once in his life before or something. Oh…

“Tch, let's go home. I'm not in the mood to be around Shittymatsu, Fappymatsu, and Jyushimatsu,” Ichimatsu scoffed, moving out of the bath, catching the other’s attention. The devilish trio left the bath together and left Choromatsu and the other two alone.

It was a full minute before Karamatsu finally spoke up, “You brothers really look up to me?” Choromatsu glanced at him to see a big dopey smile on his face with thankful tears swelling in his eyes. Oh boy, how did their father think this man could honestly be a gold digger when he was so sensitive like this?

It was also the first time Choromatsu looked at his brothers as the ones he would be stuck with for a while. He'd actually need to defend Jyushimatsu and Karamatsu from that devilish trio if they were going to help their dad prove a point. They only “won” this round because Ichimatsu probably was close to murdering Karamatsu for taking the baseball partner slot Ichimatsu usually had.

That's when it hit Choromatsu, they'd have to actually fill in roles for the others. Karamatsu would have to take on Osomatsu’s role of being a big brother and play baseball with Jyushimatsu for Ichimatsu. Choromatsu would have to go fishing with Karamatsu time to time like Todomatsu and Osomatsu usually did and also help take on tabs for food for Osomatsu. Jyushimatsu … Well he's the youngest now instead of Todomatsu, he can be as carefree as he wants ideally with no responsibilities of taking on a younger brother or taking on a depressed brother. They were truly going to have to make changes to keep the functioning life they used to have. Was it functioning? Well, they'd have to find out soon enough.

Chapter Text

Osomatsu hummed as he sat in the back of the taxi. He felt like the luckiest guy on earth next to Todomatsu and Ichimatsu since he got to live with his mother. It clearly showed who the best sons were and Osomatsu drank it up in pride. Todomatsu was easy to live with as he was still the baby brother and Ichimatsu was at least quiet, he can deal with them far better than the other three. True, he was going to miss teasing Fappymatsu and he did miss the high antics of Jyushimatsu and Karamatsu always did what he said but that's stuff he was sure Todomatsu and Ichimatsu could fill in with him.

Upon reaching the apartment, the boys shared the master bedroom while their mother enjoyed a cozy smaller room for herself. The kitchen was fair size and the living room was a dominant room in size. It was going to be very easy for a family of four to fit in.

Osomatsu was quick to take a corner for himself to put his bags down while Ichimatsu took the window area for his bags. Todomatsu was left putting his stuff off to the side for now but it was near an outlet at least for his phone charger.

“Alright guys! Time to enjoy the high life!” Osomatsu sighed blissfully as he laid on the floor and rested his head on his backpack. He'd unpack later, he figured.

“Geeze, you're already going to do nothing? You really don't change,” Todomatsu teased but laid next to him on his own bag. Ichimatsu already was on the floor but seemed to just let his head rest on the cold floor.

“Today is such a good day, let's just lay here and enjoy it,” Osomatsu hummed.

“Heh, that's not that bad of an idea,” Todomatsu nodded, staring at the ceiling, “We can finally get some peace and quiet without those three. I wonder who's going to replace them for us.”

“What do you mean?” Osomatsu glanced at the youngest curiously.

“Well I mean, it's not going to be long now till someone is the new ‘Shittymatsu’. The one who's the most ‘painful’ in comparison to the rest! Oh and who's going to be the new Fappymatsu? I know you already fap enough, Osomatsu, who's going to catch you in the act of it?” Todomatsu shrugged casually, “It's just nature for someone to fill in these gaps, right?”

“Then you're Shittymatsu,” Ichimatsu spoke up from behind his mask, not bothering to look at Todomatsu, “It's so painful to see you flirt with those girls yet you're still a virgin?”

“Huh?! No way! I'm not Shittymatsu! You are! It's so painful to see you try to be all scary when we all know you're such a Normie!” Todomatsu shot up with an angry expression on his face.

“Hey! Guys! Quit arguing! No one is going to be Shittymatsu! That's why we got chosen and not them,” Osomatsu scolded them, giving them a frustrated huff.

“Osomatsu is Fappymatsu,” Ichimatsu mumbled, “Next he's going to rise and tell us to get a job…”

“What? No way! I totally plan to just enjoy having no responsibilities! I mean, this is all literally why we wanted to live with Mom,” Osomatsu sighed.

“What about Jyushimatsu, then? Who's going to be the one who's ‘cute’ and a ‘ray of sunshine’?” Todomatsu hummed innocently, obviously fishing for compliments.

“Not you, Disgustingmatsu,” Ichimatsu mumbled and rolled to lay on his side, “You hate sports.”

“Guys, what did I just say? Quit this talk about those guys! It's so stupid to think of. None of us will be like them, it's why we are here! Because we aren't them!” Osomatsu scolded them again, “We’re here because Todomatsu is cunning, Ichimatsu is scary, and Mom thinks I'm a cute needy son! End of story.”

The trio fell into silence as they laid around. Todomatsu played games on his phone, Osomatsu eventually dug out a comic, and Ichimatsu stared out the window. They really tried to enjoy the peace and quiet.

But… Osomatsu was bored. He could annoy Todomatsu somehow by trying to peek at his phone over the shoulder and criticize any little thing… But Todomatsu wasn't Choromatsu who got annoyed easily. At most, Todomatsu would lock his phone and leave the room. The youngest really didn't like putting up with bull shit. He could piss off Ichimatsu by messing with him physically with pokes and prods but he honestly preferred to keep his hands attached to him.

Maybe he did get unlucky with these two. Choromatsu was far more hilarious to piss off whenever he got bored. But that's why he didn't get picked, because he wasn't as cool as Osomatsu. How boring…

Though, a glance around the room made him realize that he wasn't the only one separated from his usual battle buddy. Osomatsu couldn't picture how Ichimatsu was feeling separated from Jyushimatsu. It was because of Jyushimatsu that Osomatsu even thought Ichimatsu had a shot in hell in society. That bouncing yellow ball of energy always made sure Ichimatsu stayed in line somewhat.

Todomatsu… Well he wouldn't call Karamatsu and Todomatsu battle buddies as Todomatsu literally always wanted to be individual and Karamatsu always clung to whoever but they were always crunched together. He knew Todomatsu slept next to Karamatsu, went fishing with Karamatsu, and at least put up with sitting next to the painful man.

Now… It seemed it'd be harder to do battle buddies. If two were to go somewhere now, one would be left behind. Osomatsu wasn't the best older brother but he did care enough to make sure no one was alone. It didn't help he was now with the most singular people ever. Todomatsu’s life was a mystery to him just due to Todomatsu’s lack of care while Ichimatsu was just singular because he was too scary to put up with.

Osomatsu was not a singular person, he loved having someone to pick on. That was the only joy of being the eldest! What was the point of being the biggest brother if his younger brothers weren't under him to bully and tease? Actually take care of them? Fuck that, that's what parents are for. Yet now, he was stuck with the two brothers who would never put up with his teasing. How unlucky was that?

He swallowed hard and took matters into his own hands. He had to assert dominance still. He looked over at Todomatsu who was scrolling through what seemed to be his Twitter feed, giving Osomatsu the perfect opportunity. He inched closer and leaned his head onto Todomatsu’s bag so he could look at the screen, too.

“I'm not playing a game or watching a video so you can go back to your own bag,” Todomatsu spoke bluntly as he locked his screen and stared at Osomatsu.

“Yeah but I want to see what my little brother is doing! You never tell me about your life so I wanna see what hot chicks are sending you tit shots!” Osomatsu smiled, earning a hard elbow to his side from Todomatsu.

“Pervert,” Todomatsu grumbled and rolled on his side so his back was to Osomatsu, trying to hide his screen as he continued scrolling. This made the eldest try harder as he sat up just enough to put his chin on Todomatsu’s shoulder to look at his screen.

“Stop! You didn't pay for this phone, did you? So stop being annoying and get back on your bag!” Todomatsu huffed as he shot up to glare down at Osomatsu.

“Come on, Totty! I just wanna see what you're doing!” Osomatsu pouted, “I'm bored!”

“Then go jerk off in the bathroom if you're so bored,” Todomatsu dismissed him bluntly, not looking at him as he leaned forward to rest his head on his knees.

“So mean! That takes too much work right now,” Osomatsu sighed wistfully as he rolled back over to lay on his bag.

Eventually the day passed on and dinner came fast. Osomatsu was more than pleased to eat up his mother’s cooking. He was thankful the grocery store was down the street and he was thankful that she got most of the cooking supplies from the divorce.

It was also nice to have three less people fighting for food, too. No Karamatsu making painful lines, no Jyushimatsu bouncing everywhere to steal a bite, and no Choromatsu making a fuss at him for taking most of the food. Though, that didn't stop Todomatsu from fussing at him. Ichimatsu was silent for the most part but was quick to snatch food for himself--has he always been that fast?

“My adorable NEETS, I hope you three can adjust to this all easily. It breaks my heart to think of you all getting sad about this. If it helps, I wouldn't even mind if Ichimatsu got a pet cat to help,” their mothers spoke between her own small bites. That was another thing Osomatsu had to get used to, their mother actually sitting with them for dinner since there was actual room to do so.

“Don't worry, Mom! We’re strong little men!” Todomatsu assured her with a sweet smile, “We’re very thankful you picked us!”

“I'm glad to hear,” she nodded before her look turned serious, “I want you three to show me I made the best decision. You are my sons and I want you three to make me proud. I know your father, he's going to try to get the other three to become better than you three to prove he's the better parent. Prove him wrong. I know you three, you're cunning, sneaky, and downright devilish deep down so nothing should stop you three from showing that we are better than him!”

Osomatsu nearly choked on his food as he realized what their mother had said. It was if she were a mob boss now! But he couldn't lie, he had to admire her admitting they were the devilish half of the brothers. After all, honest and nice guys never make the cut to the end of the movie. It's always the huge asshole who can make it to the end.

“What do you want us to do?” Ichimatsu was the one to speak first, almost seeming to hold back a smile.

“I don't need to know how you do it. I just want to see you boys make me proud. I gave an intelligent son, a strong son, and a musical son so I could take you three in because I care for you three,” she gave a small shrug and took a bite of her food.

“Well they are the more ‘honest’ half of us. I bet Choromatsu will try to get a job!” Todomatsu gave a shrug and a sweet smile despite the venom in his tone.

“Yeah, but you already have a job, Todomatsu. You've got him beat, there!” Osomatsu finally chimed in reassuringly, “I can't see any of those three ‘proving us wrong’. They're the kinds who will stay as NEETS! It's just who they are!”

“Very true,” their mother shrugged bluntly, “Which is why I'm assuming you're going to try to be better than a NEET? I'm getting old, you know. I do hope my precious sons can make sure those NEETS don't become better than you three. I would hate to have to make a trade out…”

Osomatsu screamed internally as he realized how cold their mother could be sometimes. But he couldn't blame her, divorce can really tear a family apart.

“Of course! Do you really think Shittymatsu, Fappymatsu, and Jyushimatsu can show us up! Look at us! We’re your dream team, Mom,” Todomatsu hummed confidently, “Don't you worry!”

“Good! I hope dinner is good for you three. Tomorrow I'm thinking of maybe doing a cool pork dish since that's also simple. It's going to be a little hard with that small kitchen but it should be fine!” Their mother’s tone had lifted back to a pleased one.

Dinner went on smoothly after that. No one seemed to return back to the topic of the other half of the family. Osomatsu was honestly impressed, he didn't think such a small old woman could seem so powerful but there she was. He was glad to have such a cool mother.

After dinner the trio of brothers left for the bath house, ready to just enjoy a good end to the night.

“Big brother, I can't believe you ate so much! What happened to leaving some of it for lunch tomorrow?” Todomatsu whined as the three brothers were walking up to the bath house.

“Relax, we can have some more tomorrow if we ask Mom!” Osomatsu shrugged, giving a casual shrug as he opened the door to the bath house. It was true, their mother was more than happy to spoil her sons so easily.

“Hey… Isn't that…?” Ichimatsu spoke up, pointing off to the other side of the street. Osomatsu followed his gaze to see Choromatsu there with Karamatsu and Jyushimatsu. Just his luck to kill his good mood. Osomatsu exchanged a look with Todomatsu and three pushed themselves inside quickly.

Once inside and in the locker rooms, Osomatsu took a moment to compose his good mood. He looked to see Todomatsu and Ichimatsu doing the same as they got changed out of their clothes.

“Hey guys, remember what Mom said. She doesn't need to know how, we just gotta make her proud,” the eldest gave them a devilish smile.

“Are we going to drown them?” Ichimatsu looked to Osomatsu with a sick smile.

“Ichimatsu you can't murder in public,” Todomatsu scolded him.

The three of them got changed out of their clothes and secured them away with ease as they were plotting among themselves. It was agreed upon to get the trio so mad that they'd want to leave the bathhouse to the better half. It'd be easy! Pure bragging alone was a good first step to make their mother proud, they figured.

The devilish trio spotted the other half of them in the bath waters quickly. It was clear they were attempting to ignore them but that wouldn't pass for the eldest. Osomatsu easily led Todomatsu and Ichimatsu to remind the other three who was in charge.

“Osomatsu, didn't you think mother’s cooking was spectacular today? She made such a nice chicken meal for us tonight!” Todomatsu started, speaking up to be sure the other three heard him perfectly with a sickeningly sweet tone.

“Oh yeah, I loved it! She made us chicken, vegetables, and rice! It was so warm and nice! She's such a master chef!” Osomatsu joined him in the egging on. Osomatsu could see the vein popping out of Choromatsu in his attempt to ignore them.

“Jyushimatsu,” Choromatsu refused to look at the devilish trio, “Dad is really inspirational on making sure we become better people, right?”

“Yeah! Dad said you can get a job that makes more than Totty!” Jyushimatsu nodded, proving their mother right in their father’s attempt of an attack. However, one glance over and he could see Todomatsu grind his teeth bitterly.

“Ichimatsu, didn't Mom say that you can get a pet cat now that we don't have as much high maintenanced deadweight as we used to?” Osomatsu spoke nonchalantly, adding a bit of a small half lie to it just to make a jab at them. He knew Karamatsu would take that to heart but he had to be ruthless.

“Karamatsu, I agree with that dad you can find yourself a hot and successful spouse. You don't even need to make lame and tactless jokes like most gold diggers. You can actually play an instrument and dress like you care about your appearance. You don't have a beer belly or anything,” Choromatsu spoke, making Osomatsu unconsciously put a hand on his own beer belly. Well if they were going to play dirty, then so be it.

“I think I won't murder you two in your sleep,” Ichimatsu spoke bluntly as though that was a compliment. Osomatsu accepted it as such.

“My dear brothers, as your big brother you can feel assured that I will make sure you both achieve your dreams because I believe in you,” Karamatsu spoke confidently, giving Choromatsu and Jyushimatsu a thumbs up till Ichimatsu finally broke the barrier to grab the second eldest by the shoulders tightly to glare directly at him. Damn Ichimatsu for being so easy to piss off.

“Ichimatsu! Quit that! You can't murder in front of witnesses!” Todomatsu huffed and splashed bath water at Ichimatsu to get his attention. This prompted Jyushimatsu to splash Todomatsu right back with a gleeful laughter. It did get Ichimatsu to let go but that didn't stop Osomatsu from flicking water Choromatsu’s way, either. The barrier of water splashing was broken, of course he was going to have fun.

“Hey! Why are you splashing at me? I'm trying to enjoy myself here!” Choromatsu huffed at him.

“Yeah with that stick up your ass. Come on, Fappymatsu, you've been digging at us this entire time! I'm just giving you a small reminder I'm still older than you!” Osomatsu laughed as though nothing he was saying was insulting or threatening. He was honestly starting to get pissed at how the three weren't faltering yet.

“You're only older by a few hours! That's literally nothing, you know! Besides, Karamatsu is my eldest brother now in our house so you don't scare me,” Choromatsu huffed, trying to not let that tactless insult get to him. Osomatsu felt the direct jab as he was booted from being the “eldest brother” and felt his blood boil now.

“Oh? How's that going for you guys? Has big brother Karamatsu been any good for you all? He still looks painful like before,” Todomatsu butted in with a smug smile. Making Osomatsu glad since he was one jab away from just dunking Choromatsu under the water.

“Big brother said he's going to play baseball with me tomorrow!” Jyushimatsu nodded quickly. Oh no. Osomatsu’s frustration could be compared as nothing to Ichimatsu’s rage. What was with this guy? He could see Ichimatsu fuming with rage as he was replaced for a baseball partner. That was about as bad as being booted from being the eldest, in Osomatsu’s opinion.

“Tch, let's go home. I'm not in the mood to be around Shittymatsu, Fappymatsu, and Jyushimatsu,” Ichimatsu scoffed, moving out of the bath, catching the other’s attention. Osomatsu was surprised, honestly, as he expected worst from Ichimatsu. He almost felt proud for not attempting murder. However, the three did leave together, feeling a loss on their hands.

“This is going to be harder than I expected…” Osomatsu mumbled as he walked home.

“Well like, I thought they'd step down faster! How come they're so confident?” Todomatsu huffed.

“Because they are actually nice to each other,” Ichimatsu spoke bluntly from behind his mask, “They actually believe they can fill in our roles with each other and that it'd be a good thing. Karamatsu is the big brother, Choromatsu will be the one with the job, and Jyushimatsu… I don't know. He’ll probably be the same.”

“Boo! So boring and lame!” Osomatsu whined childishly, “Why do they have to be so weird? I mean at least we are the better half! We’re smart enough to think of a way to get them to quit this! I know we can! We just underestimated them, is all!”

“No kidding… But that just means we have to step up our game! I wonder how many tweets it can take to ruin Choromatsu’s chance to get a job through reputation!” Todomatsu hummed, taking pleasure in this game.

“Go for it! And Ichimatsu, how about you get your cats to scratch the shit out of Karamatsu’s painful clothes! I bet there’s a cat or two by their home!” Osomatsu encouraged, “Hey, also, I'm proud of you today! I was so scared you'd kill one of them but you pulled through instead! I'm so proud of you!” He gave Ichimatsu’s hair a loving petting and wondered if he was glaring or hiding a smile behind the mask.

“Don't worry guys, we can do this,” Osomatsu hummed, wrapping his arms around his two younger siblings as they walked home.

Chapter Text

He tried hard to get sleep that first night. However, he felt it was useless as he had to get used to not just a new sleeping arrangement, but also the new home. It wasn’t the same as their old home and he missed it terribly. Before he could just fixate his gaze on the small swinging light’s pull-chain when he couldn’t sleep since it helped him focus on something other than his own thoughts at night, but now their light turned on and off with just a switch at the door. Before he could relax as his two younger siblings were side-by-side to him and he could enjoy their warmth if one got a bad dream and snuggled closer to him, but now he slept on the edge. Before he could feel assured that no matter what fights happened during the day would just be forgotten by morning with everything resolved, but now he wasn’t sure anything could fix a divide in the house like this.

Karamatsu felt like shit by the time morning finally crept up on him. He was tired and groggy from lack of sleep. Jyushimatsu tossed and turned all night, disturbing Choromatsu and making the idol fan complain throughout the night. Did Osomatsu always put up with this? He could remember sleeping so far on the opposite side of the futon that Jyushimatsu wasn’t ever a problem for him. If anything, he only had to deal with Ichimatsu fighting him occasionally through the night. Still though, morning came whether he wanted it to or not and he honestly didn’t want to. However, he was the big brother and he had to be up when the sun was up so he could make sure he didn’t inconvenience his brothers when it’s time to put the futon away.

Surprisingly, he didn’t realize that Jyushimatsu and Choromatsu were decent at being up early. Jyushimatsu was like a bullet to wake up only a half hour after he did to go practice swinging outside their building. Choromatsu was awake only a half hour after Jyushimatsu mostly because he wasn’t one to sleep in past 8am. Together Karamatsu and Choromatsu put the futon away with responsible ease. Breakfast was hard, the four men of the house realized that none of them had anything to eat for breakfast as no one considered that yesterday. They decided instead to have a big lunch later to make up for it and just have some toast for now.

Karamatsu found the rest of day easy going considering he didn’t have to do anything other than help unpack. He was able to find a window that took him to the roof of the apartment building so he could still happily play his guitar. He wanted to finish the song he was working on but felt himself loose the words as he realized it’d be pretty hard now to write a song about “six same faces”. Nonetheless, he was happy to play the tune still since it was pretty fun to practice.

He didn’t expect Jyushimatsu to climb up and join him after a few minutes of playing but he was secretly glad to see Jyushimatsu. The youngest of the three of them was his biggest concern from all of this, honestly. Jyushimatsu was close to Ichimatsu and was the one who preferred the six to stick together the most. He feared this divorce would take a toll on the bouncing ball of energy no matter how wide he smiled. Karamatsu wasn’t dumb, he knew his little brother hid his emotions better than anyone and it hurt his heart to think of Jyushimatsu trying to handle his emotions alone. If Ichimatsu wasn’t going to be here with Jyushimatsu, then Karamatsu was more than happy to step in and take care of his younger brother.

“Are you doing ok?” Karamatsu decided to ask, giving a reassuring smile to Jyushimatsu as he played the chords on his guitar.

“Yeah! I'm fine! Muscle muscle! Hustle hustle!” Jyushimatsu cheered before humming to the tune of the song.

Karamatsu studied him for a moment, looking at Jyushimatsu’s body more than his smile. He can see his leg bounce nervously and he can see the small bags under his eyes. He wondered how much sleep Jyushimatsu got considering it was their first night in the apartment. Karamatsu idly worried about the youngest of their trio but wondered if he had to directly address this yet.

“Jyushimatsu, how about later we go to the batting cages? I'm no expert in baseball like you but perhaps you can show me!” Karamatsu offered, feeling he needed to support the younger brother the best way he could offer.

“Yeah! Baseball is so much fun! Boyeeeh!” Jyushimatsu cheered loudly, pumping his fists up from his sleeves to the sky.

“I'm glad to hear, my brother! That is great!” Karamatsu smiled, moving a hand from the guitar to Jyushimatsu’s hair to give a light tousle.

He continued playing, switching to a tune he heard on the radio. It was just a time passer for now as he tried to watch Jyushimatsu out of the corner of his eyes. He was thankful his sunglasses hid his eyes. However Choromatsu joined them on the roof soon after, moving to sit next to Jyushimatsu so the youngest of the trio would be in the middle.

“It's so quiet inside, I thought it'd be nice for some fresh air,” Choromatsu explained, “It really sucks being alone in the apartment.”

“Yeah? It certainly is smaller… But father said it's temporary!” Karamatsu tried to reassure his brothers to keep up the good mood.

“Yeah but I think it's temporary for us to live with him, too. He wants us to grow up and move out since we’re adults,” Choromatsu stated slightly bluntly, “I don't blame him, really. We shouldn't be NEETS our entire life.”

“I’m going to find a family heirloom!” Jyushimatsu added in, raising his hand eagerly as if he were called on in class.

“And it will be the best family heirloom,” Karamatsu encouraged, giving a proud smile to Jyushimatsu before looking at Choromatsu, “Well, I believe in you, my brothers. We are powerful Matsuno brothers who can show the world that we can do anything! I think I may even strive to find a job of my own, Choromatsu. Do you think there is a place where they hire musical artists?”

He was met with a surprised expression from the green clad man, “Wait, you're not going to call me Risingmatsu? You're actually thinking of getting a job, too?”

“Uh?” Karamatsu wasn't sure why Choromatsu was surprised since it was Osomatsu and Todomatsu who started that “rising” joke, “No? I think it may be worth it to better ourselves like father said. It's clear he can't take care of us our entire lives. Besides! We should be proud of ourselves and keep making ourselves proud! If you love something, you must take care of it! So you must love yourself and take care of it!”

“Not painful! Home run!” Jyushimatsu called out, raising both arms to show the home run “passed”. Karamatsu gave a prideful smile when he was giving the praise even though internally he was screaming in glee. It's been awhile since someone said he's not painful. However he saw Choromatsu’s baffled look out of the corner of his eyes still.

“Heh, well I guess you have a point,” Choromatsu let loose a smile and looked out to the sight of the city before them, “Hey guys, how do you think the others are doing?”

At this, Karamatsu saw the falter of Jyushimatsu’s forced smile for a fraction of a second before it fixed itself back up. He could feel a tense air come on all three of them and he had to think of what to say. He was the eldest now, he had to take care of his younger brothers. As the eldest he had to take the lead to set the tone.

“They are probably enjoying a carefree life with mother. However that isn't to say they don't miss us! Last night was probably them having good brotherly fun of small bickering!” He tried to say in a way he hoped didn't sound bad. He knew the other trio too well, though. He knew he, personally, wasn't going to be missed too much. Ichimatsu probably missed Jyushimatsu for sure and Osomatsu may miss his battle buddy Choromatsu but he knew his fishing partner probably replaced him already.

“Maybe…I wonder if mom is putting them up to pressure to prove to Dad she's the better parent, too. It could explain them bothering us like that last night,” Choromatsu shrugged, also glancing at Jyushimatsu out of the corner of his eyes.

“Wrestling tag out! Can we go play baseball, big brother?” Jyushimatsu stood up straight, looking to Karamatsu now. Karamatsu gave a nod and moved to stand as well but exchanged a look with Choromatsu.

“Would you like to join us, brother? You don't have to play, you can just watch if you want. You said the apartment isn't fun by yourself…” Karamatsu offered, not wanting Choromatsu to be lonely.

“Huh? Oh, yeah sure. I'm going to fill job applications while you guys play. We’re going to the park I'm guessing?” Choromatsu stood slowly, letting Jyushimatsu pull him up.

“Yeah! Baseball in the park!” Jyushimatsu nodded eagerly. Together the trio moved inside together to change into some more relaxing clothes for the park. Choromatsu chose to wear his plaid flannel since he didn't really plan to do much playing as much as he wanted to watch them. Jyushimatsu had his baseball uniform quickly thrown on so he could grab his baseball bat and his bag of baseballs quickly. Karamatsu didn't have much clothes he minded getting dirty so he settled on the plain tank top he usually wore under his hoodie along with just some old jeans that were a bit too loose on himself.

Together the kinder trio went to the park with high hopes for an easy time. They only got a little lost once or twice as they got used to taking new roads to find the park but they found their way nonetheless. It wasn't a packed day as most were at work or school during this time. The only ones at the park was maybe just some spouses with their toddlers. Choromatsu found an empty bench where he could watch Karamatsu and Jyushimatsu play in a clear spot.

“Ok so… I haven't played in a while so do you want me to pitch or bat?” Karamatsu asked as he helped Jyushimatsu put the bag of baseballs aside.

“Bat! I need to practice pitching!” Jyushimatsu handed him the metal bat. Karamatsu nodded and moved to stand a distance from Jyushimatsu, anticipating already that Jyushimatsu had a long throwing range.

Karamatsu prepared himself mentally as Jyushimatsu moved to get ready to throw the ball. 79 meters was what he remembered the max distance Jyushimatsu could throw and he wondered if he was far enough still. It was a fast instant when the ball was shot towards him. He felt worried suddenly about the ball directly hitting his face and for a split second didn't put it past Jyushimatsu to aim at his face. However, in an attempt of defense and support to Jyushimatsu, he swung the bat when he thought the ball was close enough and was surprised when he felt the connection of metal to ball. He knew that he couldn't hit it far and wasn't surprised when he watched the ball land midway between himself and Jyushimatsu.

“Wow! First base big brother!” Jyushimatsu cheered, eagerly grinning and moving to grab another ball from the bag.

“Wow… Oh man! I can't believe I did it! Choromatsu! Did you see that?” Karamatsu took a second to cheer for himself, releasing a huge smile to both his brothers, “That was so cool, Jyushimatsu! You really are powerful!”

“Good job, Karamatsu, just don't forget that he's got another ten balls to go through,” Choromatsu gave him a thumbs up from the bench.

Karamatsu glanced back to Jyushimatsu and eagerly got back into batting position. He felt more ready this time. This time he was confident in both himself and Jyushimatsu. He could clearly see why Ichimatsu played baseball with Jyushimatsu so much.

He kept his eyes on Jyushimatsu’s hands, taking a mental note to watch how he throws just incase they swapped positions. It was another fast instant. Jyushimatsu reeled back his arm before the ball was shot forward quickly. Karamatsu watched the ball now, preparing himself to swing. It was also a fast instant that he heard someone call out, “Shittymatsu!” He jumped out of his skin in surprise and missed his chance to swing as he looked to the source. It was a fast instant of seeing Osomatsu before he also saw the sky and then darkness.

He opened his eyes to look up at Jyushimatsu and Choromatsu above him. He felt woozy but forced a smile for his brothers.

“You moved! Are you ok?” Jyushimatsu spoke quickly, “You can pitch next time!”

“O-Oh man he's going to have a nasty bruise from this… Jyushimatsu, I have water at the bench if you can grab it for me,” Choromatsu spoke.

As Jyushimatsu ran off, Karamatsu looked over to see Osomatsu and Ichimatsu standing off to the side snickering amongst themselves. It stung but he kept his smile on nonetheless to show his brothers he was ok. He forced himself to sit up but he felt a hand push him back down onto something softer than the ground. He tried to look over and guessed he was on the now empty bag that held the baseballs. How long was he out for?

“Take it easy, I don’t know for sure how bad this is yet. Jyushimatsu threw that ball pretty hard…” Choromatsu mumbled before looking towards Osomatsu and Ichimatsu, “What do you two want? You could have waited for him to hit the ball. You guys know he’s easily startled when he’s focused!”

“What? I was cheering him on!” Osomatsu snickered, “I can’t help he can’t keep it together!”

“Choromatsu, don’t worry, I’m fine…!” Karamatsu insisted as he forced himself to sit up again, delicately moving a hand up to feel for the spot he got hit. He felt like shit but kept on a cool smile. If Osomatsu was cheering for him, then he had no reason to blame him. He figured that he should’ve tried to keep it together better. After all, he’s the big brother, he can’t let himself be startled so easily.

“Is that how far you hit the ball before?” Ichimatsu finally spoke up and pointed to the ball that Karamatsu hit earlier, “Lame… you only got it that far? What is that? First base? I at least get second base…”

“Well, my brother, do not fret, I am still practicing! As beginner's’ luck, I was able to hit it that far thanks to Jyushimatsu’s amazing throw. Truly, our brother throws from the heart with his power,” Karamatsu played it off, patting himself off of dirt as Jyushimatsu came back with the water bottle.

“Big brother! Are you going to be ok?” Jyushimatsu looked to Karamatsu as Choromatsu took the bottle and held it to Karamatsu’s head. Karamatsu looked up at Jyushimatsu and saw his worried look in his eyes and chose to give him a smile and a thumbs up, “Of course, my brother, I will be better after a small break!”

“Jyushimatsu, what kind of throw did you give him? The Curveball or the Knuckle curve?” Ichimatsu looked to Jyushimatsu casually.

“Curveball! I wanted to get better at it while still making it fast!” Jyushimatsu nodded and bounced in his spot.

“Nice, nice, you're getting better at it,” Ichimatsu nodded, giving an encouraging smile.

Karamatsu took this moment to take the bottle for Choromatsu to hold to his head, thanking the cool feeling on his pained forehead. Nothing he wasn't used to, honestly. Choromatsu was collecting the baseballs and putting them in the bag again to clean up while Osomatsu seemed to try to pester him to stall him.

“Is...Is Todomatsu not with you two?” Karamatsu tried to get his bearings back as he stood to do a headcount on who was here and who wasn't.

“He's at the gym I guess,” Osomatsu shrugged, “He insisted that just because Mom and Dad got a divorce, doesn't mean the rest of his life stops or whatever!”

“Oh… Isn't he lonely though?” Karamatsu vocalized his concern. Honestly, the youngest of his brothers always had a soft--spoiled rotten--spot to him.

“Lonely? I guess not… But he insisted it, himself,” Osomatsu tried to brush it off.

“What's it matter to you? You're not part of our house,” Ichimatsu hissed at him, making Karamatsu want to cringe at the reminder of how his brothers were split down the middle.

“No, but he's still my brother and he's my youngest brother, at that,” Karamatsu explained, “I'm just making sure all of my brothers are safe whether we share a roof or not.”

“Geeze, you're so painful! I'm kind of seriously glad you're with Choromatsu and Jyushimatsu! Ichimatsu is at least quiet and Todomatsu does his own thing! It's way less painful that way!” Osomatsu winced out loud.

“Strike one, Osomatsu!” Jyushimatsu spoke up.

Karamatsu forced himself to not take Osomatsu’s words to heart. This had to be just his brothers continuing the petty contest for their parents to prove who's better. Instead he stayed quiet to help Choromatsu clean up.

“Big brother! Can we have oden for dinner tonight?” Jyushimatsu looked to Karamatsu eagerly as he bounced around the older brother.

“Oden? Uuh… Maybe if Dad doesn't have a plan for dinner, ok? Maybe we can see if he wants oden, too,” Karamatsu reasoned, not liking the idea of their father eating alone.

“First base, Karamatsu!” Jyushimatsu nodded, giving his usual smile of excitement.

“Oh yeah, you're trying this “oldest brother” act, right? Boy! That must be hard since you got Jyushimatsu!” Osomatsu snickered, patting Karamatsu’s back.

“Strike two, Osomatsu!” Jyushimatsu spoke up, seeming to keep an imaginary score in his head.

“Oh yeah, did Totty ask you guys last night to walk him to the bathroom like he usually does? He used to bother me but I figure now he's gotta bother you two, right?” Choromatsu spoke up, giving Karamatsu a brief glance before looking to Osomatsu. Karamatsu wondered if this was Choromatsu defending him.

“Yeah! What a pain! 12 at night and he starts bothering me to take him to the bathroom! 20 years old and he is still scared of the dark! What gives?” Osomatsu huffed loudly, “Did he always do that?”

“Yup. How's playing “eldest brother” going for you?” Choromatsu gave a smug smile of his own, earning a bitter look from Osomatsu.

“First base! Choromatsu!” Jyushimatsu spoke up, giving the older brother praise.

“You find a job yet? Totty told me someone on Twitter posted an old picture of you in your Nyaa-chan merchandise last night,” Osomatsu gave a smug smile.

“Strike three, Osomatsu! You're out!” Jyushimatsu spoke up, stepping between the eldest and Choromatsu as the otaku seemed speechless at the new information.

“Hey, let's go then,” Ichimatsu spoke up as he pulled the eldest a few steps back away from Jyushimatsu, seeming to read Jyushimatsu like a book. None of the other brothers were entirely sure what Jyushimatsu would do if this continued but Karamatsu was honestly glad to have the strongest brother on his side. Ichimatsu led Osomatsu out of the park and the kinder trio was left to grab their stuff and head home.

“Jyushimatsu, thank you for stepping up like that. What were you planning to do to him?” Choromatsu spoke up on the walk home.

“Octopus hold!” Jyushimatsu answered loud and proud with a bounce in his step.

Chapter Text

Ichimatsu was learning things he didn't want to learn. For one, he learned that Todomatsu was scared of the dark. Todomatsu specifically demanded to sleep between Osomatsu and him so that he was protected and safe. However, Osomatsu fought in his sleep. Punches, kicks, you name it, and because Todomatsu was in the middle, he got all of it. It was useless to tell Osomatsu to quit as the eldest was utterly useless.

This got Ichimatsu thinking. What was Todomatsu so scared of? Who was Osomatsu fighting? It really bothered Ichimatsu. He realized then and there that while he was used to the usual stress and anxiety of Choromatsu, the narcissism and possible depression of Karamatsu, and the ADHD and fears of Jyushimatsu, Todomatsu and Osomatsu always seemed too normal till it came down to the wire.

Realizing this put him way too far on edge the next morning. He tried to think back on when Choromatsu first started complaining about Osomatsu’s sleep habits. He pushed it all the way back to when they were kids when Osomatsu used to toss and turn too much at night with the occasional scream of the boogeyman. He tried to think on how far back Todomatsu was scared of the dark and pushed it back that far, as well, at the idea that it was from when they were kids. Back then Karamatsu usually walked Todomatsu to the restroom at night, if he recalled correctly.

So much for being “normies”.

Ichimatsu was honestly confused on how he missed noticing this till now. This shit seemed obvious! But what gives? He tried to think of what could've scared them but came up with nothing except maybe that one robber from when they were kids or maybe a prank gone too far but was that really it? He realized he knew very little about these two brothers.

“Ichimatsu, what are your plans today?” Osomatsu snapped him out of his thoughts over breakfast.

“U-Uh… I don't know… Probably nothing,” he mumbled and looked away. He didn't honestly ever have specific plans so he wondered why he was being questioned now about it.

“Well, I'm going to the gym today. Just because this divorce happened, doesn't mean my life stops. I've gotta keep my figure,” Todomatsu spoke up, picking at his food briefly.

“Geeze, you guys are both so boring! Ichimatsu, how about you come play panchiko with me!” Osomatsu grinned his way and he wanted to cringe at the idea of being forced to gamble away his money. He'd rather spend towards cat food.

“No thanks. I'm busy,” blatant lie and the entire table knew it. He didn't care, he was more interested in taking it easy today. What else would someone with no purpose do? Or at least, that was his reasoning.

The other two brothers continued eating with as little or much grace they could. Ichimatsu learned that Osomatsu was gross when he eats, it's as if he's a bottomless pit with no brakes. Todomatsu tried way too hard to be cute when he ate, always making sure he ate with subtle grace but kept on a smile the whole time. Only one person should keep on a smile when they chew and it should've been Jyushimatsu.

Speaking of the hyperactive brother, Ichimatsu was learning that he really honestly had nothing to do if he didn't have his younger brother there. Jyushimatsu always checked up on him to make sure he didn't fall like he did in high school and always gave him something to keep his mind busy.

After breakfast he at least forced himself to pull his hoodie on and his sweat pants. He had to at least pretend that he had a day to get started. He nearly forgot to take his anti-depressants till Todomatsu mentioned his pill bottle being in the way of his hair straightener. He moved the bottle to the kitchen for now and took his dose with water.

After that… Well, he had shit luck coming up with a solution to boredom. Just because he was in a new home with three less brothers, it didn't mean he had anything new to do with his day. In fact, it gave him less to do. At least before it was a game to count how many times Karamatsu made a shit comment. At least before it was a game to see how many hours he could sleep in till Choromatsu would force him up. At least before life was a game to play with Jyushimatsu.

Now he had even less to do other than just sprawl out on the floor. He could unpack, he could set the room up the way he wanted till Todomatsu got home. But he chose not to. Instead, he felt more comfort laying there and just waiting for something to call upon him to work. He was content with just barely needing to exist.

Sadly, that phrase of “something to call upon him to work” and “barely needing to exist” came into play faster than Ichimatsu wanted. Osomatsu was looming above his head for a solid moment with a shit-eating grin on his face as the eldest waited till Ichimatsu acknowledged him.

“Want to go hang with me? I’m really bored and this place is too stuffy! Let's go to the park or grab some food! Oh! Better! Let's do both!” Osomatsu spoke up, making Ichimatsu want to cringe.

“Fuck… fine,” Ichimatsu gave in, figuring he had no excuse not to go. He wondered if this was for the best since Jyushimatsu can’t force him to do anything anymore.

He was quickly pulled up and out of the apartment by the eldest. He didn’t really have much say on where they were going but kept with it anyways. He followed Osomatsu like he did his whole life. This did, however, draw his mind back to his curiosities about the eldest. Out of all his brothers, he really only knew vague things about the eldest. How? This shit head did nothing but lay around all day.

“Hey, Osomatsu-niisan,” he had to pull the ‘nii-san’ card if he was going to get a decent answer, “Can I ask about something?”

“Huh? You want to ask your dear oldest brother something? What is it?” Osomatsu’s eyes shined and he had a big dumb smile like he always did when someone addressed him with the honorific.

“How come you fight in your sleep? Todomatsu seemed pissed by the morning,” Ichimatsu asked bluntly, hoping that bringing up Todomatsu would ease the blow. He guessed right when he saw that shine in Osomatsu’s eyes dim a bit.

“What are you talking about? I don’t remember my dreams last night, sorry,” Osomatsu brushed him off easily, looking ahead with his hands in his pockets. Ichimatsu watched him for a moment before looking ahead at the bridge they were crossing.

“Ok, I guess. I was just curious. I’m not used to sleeping close to you so I hope Totty doesn’t change the order up just because you give him bruises…” Ichimatsu shrugged, hoping to backpedal out of this. He still had the rest of the day to fuck up, anyways.

“Nah, Todomatsu will probably just have to put up with it. He’s the youngest, he’ll handle it,” Osomatsu shrugged, “He’s no better trying to bother us so late at night about needing to go to the bathroom!”

Ichimatsu gave a grunt of aggreeance as they aimlessly wandered around the city. Was there really nothing better to do? Then he saw it in the distance. The park. The god damn park with god damn shittymatsu in it. Not only that, but shittymatsu was playing god damn baseball with Jyushimatsu. Was that some weak attempt to hit the ball? It made connection but at what cost? For it to uselessly fall between them. Ichimatsu knew it could be done better. Jyushimatsu can do far better. Sure, he, himself, was not the best, but he knew at least how to hold the bat right.

He elbowed Osomatsu to get his attention towards the park. He knew the eldest wouldn’t hesitate at an opportunity like this.

“Shittymatsu!” Osomatsu called when Jyushimatsu threw the next ball. It was a fast instance of Karamatsu jumping out of his skin and the ball connecting with his ugly face. He felt a swell of pride as they walked up to approach the scene they caused. It was a fun game to him, after all.

Of course, Karamatsu took forever to wake up (seriously, 2 whole minutes? Give the world a break…). And of course he gave everyone a big ugly smile. Ichimatsu felt his stomach twist in annoyance. How could he smile when he was in pain? It made no sense to him and he hated that.

Choromatsu rushed to Karamatsu’s side quickly, grabbing Jyushimatsu’s bag full of baseballs and emptied it quickly along the ground. Ichimatsu gave a small ‘tsk’ at the mess. He watched Choromatsu turn the bag into a makeshift pillow for the second eldest and felt like he was going to vomit. What’s with the sudden concern for Karamatsu?

“You moved! Are you ok?” Jyushimatsu spoke quickly, “You can pitch next time!”

“O-Oh man he's going to have a nasty bruise from this… Jyushimatsu, I have water at the bench if you can grab it for me,” Choromatsu spoke.

As Jyushimatsu ran off, Osomatsu let out a snicker and Ichimatsu followed suit. He had to to keep his ground. He watch Karamatsu sit up but Choromatsu pushed him back down onto the makeshift pillow. What a mess…

“Take it easy, I don’t know for sure how bad this is yet. Jyushimatsu threw that ball pretty hard…” Choromatsu mumbled before looking towards Osomatsu and Ichimatsu, “What do you two want? You could have waited for him to hit the ball. You guys know he’s easily startled when he’s focused!”

“What? I was cheering him on!” Osomatsu snickered, “I can’t help he can’t keep it together!”

“Choromatsu, don’t worry, I’m fine…!” Karamatsu insisted as he sat up again, moving a hand up to feel for the spot he got hit. He kept on a cool smile and Ichimatsu wanted to punch it out. Who the hell smiles after being hit with a fucking baseball from Jyushimatsu?

He then glanced down the way at the baseballs and spotted the one Karamatsu hit earlier. How lame…

“Is that how far you hit the ball before?” Ichimatsu finally spoke up and pointed to the ball that Karamatsu hit earlier, “Lame… you only got it that far? What is that? First base? I at least get second base…”

“Well, my brother, do not fret, I am still practicing! As beginner's’ luck, I was able to hit it that far thanks to Jyushimatsu’s amazing throw. Truly, our brother throws from the heart with his power,” Karamatsu spoke with that narcissistic charm in his voice, patting himself off of dirt as Jyushimatsu came back with the water bottle.

“Big brother! Are you going to be ok?” Jyushimatsu looked to Karamatsu as Choromatsu took the bottle and held it to Karamatsu’s head. Karamatsu looked up at Jyushimatsu and saw his worried look in his eyes and chose to give him a smile and a thumbs up, “Of course, my brother, I will be better after a small break!”

Ichimatsu hated how Jyushimatsu hadn’t even said “hello” to him yet. What the fuck? He was supposed to be Jyushimatsu’s best friend. He was supposed to be his baseball partner. He was supposed to be the closest brother to Jyushimatsu.

“Jyushimatsu, what kind of throw did you give him? The Curveball or the Knuckle curve?” Ichimatsu looked to Jyushimatsu casually, holding back his annoyance.

“Curveball! I wanted to get better at it while still making it fast!” Jyushimatsu nodded and bounced in his spot.

“Nice, nice, you're getting better at it,” Ichimatsu nodded, giving an encouraging smile. He had to if he wanted to stay on Jyushimatsu’s good side.

Choromatsu was collecting the baseballs and putting them in the bag again to clean up while Osomatsu seemed to try to pester him to stall him. Good, distract the only brother with a brain so Ichimatsu can try to reign in this shitfest while he could.

“Is...Is Todomatsu not with you two?” Karamatsu stood slowly with the bottle to his head. Ichimatsu felt gross at how concerned Karamatsu was about everyone else. This would’ve been the time he tried to butt in with something about his own talent at baseball. Not do headcounts and try to be concerned about others. Ichimatsu felt gross in his stomach. Was it jealousy? Fuck that, he was too exhausted for something like that to stir in him.  

“He's at the gym I guess,” Osomatsu shrugged, “He insisted that just because Mom and Dad got a divorce, doesn't mean the rest of his life stops or whatever!”

“Oh… Isn't he lonely though?” Karamatsu vocalized his concern. Ichimatsu wanted to punch him in the face. Great, now he and Osomatsu looked like pricks for letting their baby brother go on their own.

“Lonely? I guess not… But he insisted it, himself,” Osomatsu tried to brush it off.

“What's it matter to you? You're not part of our house,” Ichimatsu hissed at him, making sure Shittymatsu remembered the division in the family.

“No, but he's still my brother and he's my youngest brother, at that,” Karamatsu explained, “I'm just making sure all of my brothers are safe whether we share a roof or not.”

“Geeze, you're so painful! I'm kind of seriously glad you're with Choromatsu and Jyushimatsu! Ichimatsu is at least quiet and Todomatsu does his own thing! It's way less painful that way!” Osomatsu winced out loud.

“Strike one, Osomatsu!” Jyushimatsu spoke up. Not good. Ichimatsu looked straight to Jyushimatsu to read him. He was mad? Ichimatsu decided to see if the eldest would push this too far or not.

Was Karamatsu trying to clean up the baseball mess with a fucking head injury? Who does that? Ichimatsu wished a giant hole would open from the ground and swallow him whole.

“Big brother! Can we have oden for dinner tonight?” Jyushimatsu looked to Karamatsu eagerly as he bounced around the older brother.

“Oden? Uuh… Maybe if Dad doesn't have a plan for dinner, ok? Maybe we can see if he wants oden, too,” Karamatsu reasoned. What’s with the weird normal talking? He actually sounded human! Ichimatsu wanted to tear him apart.

“First base, Karamatsu!” Jyushimatsu nodded, giving his usual smile of excitement. Again, what the fuck? How come Jyushimatsu suddenly gave a shit about Karamatsu? Jyushimatsu always used to join in on the games Ichimatsu played on Karamatsu.

“Oh yeah, you're trying this “oldest brother” act, right? Boy! That must be hard since you got Jyushimatsu!” Osomatsu snickered, patting Karamatsu’s back.

“Strike two, Osomatsu!” Jyushimatsu spoke up, seeming to keep an imaginary score in his head. Fan-fucking-tastic. Ichimatsu had a feeling Osomatsu would push this more.

“Oh yeah, did Totty ask you guys last night to walk him to the bathroom like he usually does? He used to bother me but I figure now he's gotta bother you two, right?” Choromatsu spoke up, giving Karamatsu a brief glance before looking to Osomatsu. Was this a defense to Karamatsu? Gross…  

“Yeah! What a pain! 12 at night and he starts bothering me to take him to the bathroom! 20 years old and he is still scared of the dark! What gives?” Osomatsu huffed loudly, “Did he always do that?”

“Yup. How's playing “eldest brother” going for you?” Choromatsu gave a smug smile of his own, earning a bitter look from Osomatsu.

“First base! Choromatsu!” Jyushimatsu spoke up, giving the older brother praise. Ichimatsu felt like he should speak up about his concerns about Todomatsu’s fear of the dark but he knew now was not the time to do it if Jyushimatsu was counting strikes and bases.

“You find a job yet? Totty told me someone on Twitter posted an old picture of you in your Nyaa-chan merchandise last night,” Osomatsu gave a smug smile. Did he? That must’ve been discussed over breakfast when he wasn’t paying attention… Or was it a lie? That wouldn’t surprise him, either. Osomatsu was too competitive.

“Strike three, Osomatsu! You're out!” Jyushimatsu spoke up, stepping between the eldest and Choromatsu. Oh yeah he was supposed to be stopping Osomatsu from going too far. That’s just fucking great. Now Jyushimatsu was mad at them… Ichimatsu wanted to vomit again.  

“Hey, let's go then,” Ichimatsu spoke up as he pulled the eldest a few steps back away from Osomatsu, reading Jyushimatus like a book. None of the other brothers were entirely sure what Jyushimatsu would do if this continued but Ichimatsu knew it’d end in pain and punishment. Ichimatsu led Osomatsu out of the park and insisted on going home. He felt too sick to keep shitting around with Osomatsu.

“What’s his deal? Does Jyushimatsu always do that?” Osomatsu huffed on the way home.

“Only when he’s mad at someone who’s a threat…” Ichimatsu mumbled, looking away. What an awful feeling he felt tug into his stomach.

“What? Seriously? He thinks I’m a threat and was mad at me? I didn’t think he had it in him!” Osomatsu made a surprised noise.

“Yeah, well, it happened. Just gotta make it up to him next time you see him. Maybe then he’ll forget about being mad at you,” Ichimatsu sighed.

“Man, what a pain…” Osomatsu sighed and put his hands behind his neck.

“Is… Is this the best idea? To piss them off to the point that even Jyushimatsu is mad? It’s kind of… not a good idea if you ask me,” Ichimatsu didn’t realize he needed to ask this. Yet there it was, being blurt out before he could stop it.

“What? Of course! We gotta remind them how great we are so they’ll want to beg to come back to us! Easy peasy with those three!” Osomatsu snickered.

“You want them back, then?” Ichimatsu glanced at the eldest curiously.

“Well, it’s hard to play the “sextuplet” card to hot chicks if you’ve got only two twins to show for it!” Osomatsu played it off but Ichimatsu was able to see through the lie. Did Osomatsu miss them that badly? He thought back on what he did know about Osomatsu for sure. Osomatsu never liked the idea of them deterring off to do their own thing without his consent. He remembered how much of a fit at first Osomatsu threw when Todomatsu first went to the gym. Ichimatsu wondered how long Osomatsu was going to act this way till he would be forced to accept the divide in the family.

What a mess this family is.

Chapter Text

“1,258…” Swing, “1,259…” Swing, “1,260!”

Jyushimatsu put the bat down, letting Karamatsu take a breather. The older matsu felt sick and dizzy, face going green as he attempted to keep his balance on his feet. Jyushimatsu untied the elder from the bat and gave him a wide grin.

“Thank you, Nii-san!” Jyushimatsu hummed eagerly, flexing his muscles for his brother to see, “Muscle! Muscle! Hustle! Hustle!”

“Yeah… Anything for you… Brother,” Karamatsu leaned against the wall of the apartment complex.

“Are you still coming with me to the park?” Jyushimatsu asked curiously, bouncing in front of his brother.

“Uuh… Maybe not… I'm a little uh… Sick I think,” Karamatsu put his hand to his face.

“Ok! That's ok! Ichimatsu-niisan usually takes a nap after practice!” Jyushimatsu nodded.

“Yeah… A nap sounds perfect right now,” Karamatsu nodded before pushing himself forward to ruffle the younger’s hair affectionately, “I'll see you later then, ok? Try not to cause too much trouble.”

“Will do!” Jyushimatsu gave a salute as the elder made his way inside. Jyushimatsu adjusted his baseball hat before marching his way to the park. From there he went to do his usual routine of practice.

Thankfully by lunch time, he was able to take a break and grab food. He didn't have much money on hand and chose to go to the one place he knew would have sweets.

“Totty!” Jyushimatsu cheered as he entered the Sutabaa. He could see the younger matsu cringe and shoo his coworkers to the break room as fast as he could manage.

“Jyushimatsu-niisan…! What are you doing here?” Todomatsu fumbled quickly to move anything that could spill out of the older’s way on the counter.

“Sweets! I want sweets!” Jyushimatsu nodded with a wide grin, “Please?”

“Alright but it's going to cost you…” Todomatsu sighed, moving to ring him up, “How's things at home?”

“Fun! Karamatsu-niisan helps me practice now! And Choromatsu-niisan is trying to find me a team to play on!” Jyushimatsu nodded, “But it's kinda too quiet at home!”

“Well, you do have those two jerks there. They're not as loud as Osomatsu-niisan…” Todomatsu sighed, “But at least they're helpful it sounds like. Sadly, as loud as Osomatsu-niisan can be, it's still kinda boring. No one comes through with all their loud baseball equipment! Osomatsu-niisan usually goes gambling and Ichimatsu sleeps a lot…”

“You gotta wake him up so he doesn't loose his hustle hustle!” Jyushimatsu flexed his arms for Todomatsu, “You gotta!”

“No way! He’s such a pain for me…” Todomatsu sighed, “I'll get you your sweets, though, ok?”

“S-S-S-Sweets!” Jyushimatsu bounced around the the front of the counter.

“Yes, yes, now pay up,” Todomatsu gave a small laugh. Jyushimatsu pulled out a ball of bills and clattered some coins on the table before giving Todomatsu his usual smile. With a sigh, Todomatsu sorted through the money before handing him his change.

Jyushimatsu waited as patiently as he could manage for his sweets. This included bouncing back and forth between the tables and the counter. There were only a few customers seated off to the side so he didn't care much if he disturbed them or not.

“Jyushimatsu!” Todomatsu called to him when his treat was finished, “Here, niisan! Please don't make a mess.”

“Will do! Will do!” Jyushimatsu gave a salute as he grabbed the glass that held his sweet delight.

“Uh… Actually, nii-san, I was wondering… You're the only decent one among us and I'm tired of fighting for my food over Osomatsu-niisan. I know everyone is taking sides and all but would you be ok meeting me at Chibita’s stand for dinner?”

Todomatsu gave him a hopeful look. Todomatsu was his only little brother and he couldn't help but nod to give him the same brotherly support his other brothers gave him. Besides, he liked Totty! Totty was responsible and funny!

“Good! I'll meet you there around 5!” Todomatsu hummed, “Enjoy your break!”

Jyushimatsu enjoyed his treat before quickly going back to practice. By the time he was done, it was already nearing 3:30. He was home quickly and took a fast shower to get mostly the sweat and dirt off of himself. He was ready to go by 4:30, not being the kind to enjoy Todomatsu’s wrath when he was late. As he tugged his slip-ons on, he was stopped by Choromatsu.

“Where are you going? It's almost dinner time?” Choromatsu gave him a curious look.

“I'm going to dinner at Chibita’s stand!” Jyushimatsu nodded, “I'll be back after dinner!”

“Chibita’s?” Karamatsu’s voice piped up from the couch, “That actually sounds really good right now…”

“No! No! Totty asked if I could go! I think he wants to eat alone! Said everybody else was too annoying!” Jyushimatsu spoke bluntly with a smile, already knowing that Karamatsu never hesitates to tag along for Chibita’s.

“Totty?! You're going to eat with him? It's probably a trap for sure!” Choromatsu yelped, “Let us go, too, just in case!”

“Haha! Nah! Totty is my little brother! I'm just being nice! Besides! I've got MUSCLE MUSCLE!” Jyushimatsu flexed to reassure them.

“Alright but… Try to not let him get into your head, ok? He's the most dangerous of us all and is the most cunning! Be careful!” Choromatsu sighed.

“Don't worry! CR lets go!” Jyushimatsu cheered, turning to leave.

By the time he got to Chibita’s stand, Todomatsu was already there eating away. The youngest gave him a welcoming wave and Chibita began serving Jyushimatsu.

“What did the others say about you coming to eat out?” Todomatsu asked curiously, glancing at him briefly between bites.

“Choromatsu-niisan thinks this is a trap but Karamatsu wanted to come!” Jyushimatsu answered honestly, hoping the callout would fix any sort of ‘trap’ Choromatsu feared.

“Heehee! So lame! I lied and told the others I'm going to eat with some girls. Osomatsu and Ichimatsu were so jealous!” the youngest giggled.

“Can I ask about that? You guys are so troublesome together and seem to be worst separated! What gives?” Chibita questioned curiously.

“Mom and Dad got a divorce and Mom picked who she wanted to take with her! Dad got the leftovers!” Todomatsu sighed, “But it's so annoying! I'm stuck now with Osomatsu and Ichimatsu! They're smelly and gross! At least Karamatsu and Choromatsu were tidy!”

“Haha! They're kind of quiet but they're nice! I miss Ichimatsu-niisan and Osomatsu-niisan, though!” Jyushimatsu nodded between bites.

“I hate to say it but I kind of miss you guys, too… This is so stupid! What did mom and dad fight about, anyways?” Todomatsu huffed with a puff of his cheeks.

“Mom’s flat and Dad’s bad at sex? I don't know!” Jyushimatsu joked bluntly, “It's kind of lame!”

“Have you guys tried to talk your parents into getting together if you hate it so much?” Chibita asked, sitting back to drink his water.

“We tried to talk them out of all of this but they were pretty set!” Todomatsu sighed, “We could try again but… Now that we’re separated, isn't it kind of hard?”

“Well there's a movie out there called uh… Trap Parent? Parent Trap? I don't know, but it's kind of the same as what's going on? These two twin girls were separated at birth and meet at camp. Then they switch places when it's time to go home so that they can see what the other parent is like and then they get their parents back together in some huge plot…” Chibita thought back.

“Oh! Yeah! We’ve seen that! There's only a few good movies out there involving twins and the old one is pretty cool!” Todomatsu nodded.

“Totty! Let's trade then! It's easy! We did it when we were kids!” Jyushimatsu bounced in his spot, “Then I can hang with Ichimatsu-niisan and Osomatsu-niisan!”

“Ok! Sure! It can't be that hard to be you! And then during the day when you go to practice and I go to work we can just be ourselves!” Todomatsu nodded.

“Yeah! You just got to have Muscle Muscle!” Jyushimatsu nodded, feeling excited at this new game, “And then we can think of a way to get everyone together!”

Jyushimatsu and Todomatsu laughed in agreeance together as they hatched up their new plan. Once they finished eating, Todomatsu and Jyushimatsu moved to a public bathroom to switch clothes. Next they took time to fix each other’s hair while practicing each other’s expressions. Jyushimatsu had a small trouble keeping his mouth closed. Honestly, he did break his nose playing too hard as a child and had trouble sometimes breathing through it all the time, but it wasn't impossible. He did notice that Todomatsu’s cheeks seemed to hurt a bit when he held his forced smile on for too long.

“Tomorrow! You can wear my jumpsuit and zip it up so it covers your mouth!” Jyushimatsu offered to help him.

“Thank goodness… Maybe it'll help them not see how I've got cuter cheeks while you're kinda more angular. It's going to take some serious makeup magic to copy you really well,” Todomatsu sighed in relief.

With that, “Todomatsu” and “Jyushimatsu” went “home”. It was a little odd for Jyushimatsu to walk in to smell a home cooked meal compared to ordered pizza. Ichimatsu and Osomatsu didn't seem to notice a difference, it seemed, and Jyushimatsu took pride in sitting with them to watch tv after dinner. He felt happier to sit between his two older brothers and didn't even notice his smile rise up.

“Totty, you ok?” Osomatsu glanced at him.

“O-Oh! Yeah! Totally fine! Just super happy!” Jyushimatsu hoped his voice went high enough to sound like the youngest brother’s voice. He quickly corrected his smile and gave them a wink.

“You get those girl’s numbers?” Ichimatsu grunted as he fidgeted with a cat toy.

“Oh! Yeah, totally! They were so hot!” Jyushimatsu laughed with a nod, looking to Ichimatsu to hold up Todomatsu’s phone. He didn't expect to be turned by Osomatsu so fast so the other could study him.

“Are you really Todomatsu? You're too… Nice?” Osomatsu looked him over. Damn, Osomatsu was the kind to actually know all of his brothers pretty well.

“Of course I am! I am the cutest Prince, after all!” Jyushimatsu stood to get away from Osomatsu, giving a stretch, “I'm kind of tired. Those girls were all over me and everything! I'm going to bed!”

He was thankful that Osomatsu relented and let him go. He had to act harder, it seemed.

Chapter Text

Todomatsu made a huff with a fist connecting to his cheek. Damn his brother for being unable to lay still. He looked to the time on the wall to see he had to get up anyways. He had work today and he honestly had to make sure he was on time. He took time off so that he could help his family move but now he was down in cash.

He got ready quickly and frowned as he got dressed. It was too quiet in the morning. No loud Jyushimatsu getting his baseball gear on or Karamatsu playing guitar on the roof. Not even Choromatsu there to scold Osomatsu and Ichimatsu for sleeping in. He hated this morning stillness. He was stuck with the laziest two of the sextuplets.

By the time he was ready to head out, thankfully Osomatsu and Ichimatsu were somewhat awake. More like Osomatsu was rummaging for food and Ichimatsu moved from the futon to the couch.

“Niisan, you should go out and do something today,” Todomatsu tried to suggest to Ichimatsu as he searched for his coat, “You haven't even fully unpacked.”

“Whatever…” was all Ichimatsu grunted back. He was too tired to argue with him, honestly.

“Totty! Are you going to work? Grab us free food!” Osomatsu called to him as he tugged his shoes on at the door.

“No. Get your own food,” Todomatsu huffed at him.

“So mean! After all we do for you!” Osomatsu whined childishly from their small kitchen.

“Like what?! Punch me in my sleep?!” Todomatsu barked back at him, feeling too agitated already. Was this what it was like to be Choromatsu?

“Boys! Knock it off! It's too early!” Their mother scolded them from her room.

Todomatsu rolled his eyes and left for work. At least there it can feel like everything was still normal. It was fun at first to play war with his brothers but now he just felt like it was too unbalanced. Jyushimatsu got Ichimatsu to look alive, Choromatsu got Osomatsu to not be a total lazy asshole, and… And honestly Karamatsu made him feel inclined to at least be a little gentler to his brothers. He usually wanted to be the nicest out of the brothers and Karamatsu always gave him a run for his money in that department. Not to mention how easy it was to just vent his frustrations through talking to the elder matsuno rather than bicker it out with the others.

At work he could still just be “Totty” who wasn't a total virgin NEET and was cute and sociable. He didn't have his brothers tie him down and he didn't need to fear the idea that his world was coming apart so quickly. He felt more at peace when he was at work. Sure, he had a few annoying customers but he would choose them over his shitty brothers any day.

That is… Except for when Jyushimatsu comes storming in with his loud personality. He usually would be annoyed that any of the brothers showed their faces at his work but this time he honestly felt relieved that it wasn't the same two he's been stuck with.

“Totty!” Jyushimatsu cheered as he entered the Sutabaa. He did visibly cringe and shoo his coworkers away but that was despite the point.

“Jyushimatsu-niisan…! What are you doing here?” Todomatsu fumbled quickly to move anything that could spill out of the older’s way on the counter. Like hell he was going to let the older matsuno ruin his work space.

“Sweets! I want sweets!” Jyushimatsu nodded with a wide grin, “Please?”

“Alright but it's going to cost you…” Todomatsu sighed, moving to ring him up, after a moment of consideration he decided to ask, “How's things at home?”

“Fun! Karamatsu-niisan helps me practice now! And Choromatsu-niisan is trying to find me a team to play on!” Jyushimatsu nodded, “But it's kinda too quiet at home!”

“Well, you do have those two jerks there. They're not as loud as Osomatsu-niisan…” Todomatsu sighed, holding back his jealousy only slightly, “But at least they're helpful it sounds like. Sadly, as loud as Osomatsu-niisan can be, it's still kinda boring. No one comes through with all their loud baseball equipment! Osomatsu-niisan usually goes gambling and Ichimatsu sleeps a lot…”

“You gotta wake him up so he doesn't loose his hustle hustle!” Jyushimatsu flexed his arms for Todomatsu, “You gotta!”

“No way! He’s such a pain for me…” Todomatsu sighed, “I'll get you your sweets, though, ok?”

“S-S-S-Sweets!” Jyushimatsu bounced around the the front of the counter.

“Yes, yes, now pay up,” Todomatsu gave a small laugh. Jyushimatsu pulled out a ball of bills and clattered some coins on the table before giving Todomatsu his usual smile. With a sigh, Todomatsu sorted through the money before handing him his change.

Todomatsu got the off menu request made the best he could. He glanced to the older Matsuno as he worked and felt a little disappointed that his time with the other was so short after not seeing him in a while. Then, an idea came to him.

“Jyushimatsu!” Todomatsu called to him when his treat was finished, “Here, niisan! Please don't make a mess.”

“Will do! Will do!” Jyushimatsu gave a salute as he grabbed the glass that held his sweet delight.

“Uh… Actually, nii-san, I was wondering… You're the only decent one among us and I'm tired of fighting for my food over Osomatsu-niisan. I know everyone is taking sides and all but would you be ok meeting me at Chibita’s stand for dinner?” Todomatsu gave him a hopeful look. He hoped and begged internally that those other two jerks of brothers didn't get it in Jyushimatsu’s head that he was the enemy.

Thankfully, Jyushimatsu gave him an eager nod.

“Good! I'll meet you there around 5!” Todomatsu hummed, “Enjoy your break!”

As predicted, Jyushimatsu ate his treat outside (as requested of Todomatsu after everyone found out where he worked) before going back to practice. Todomatsu was sad that the older one was gone so fast but at least looked forward to eating with someone a bit more cheerful and less of an asshole.

Thankfully he finished work around 3:00 and got home to clean himself up. It didn't take much effort to make himself cute and he easily was ready to leave by 4:30. He was grabbing his shoes on when he saw Ichimatsu staring at him from the couch.

“What?” Todomatsu questioned his stare, unpleased that the older matsuno didn't leave his spot all day.

“Where are you going?” Ichimatsu finally asked after another long moment of silence.

“I'm going out for dinner. I'm meeting some girls at work,” Todomatsu huffed out a lie, not wanting them in his business.

“What? Totty is going to eat with some chicks! You aren't trying to bang them, are you?” Osomatsu chimed in as he came to the living room with a bag of chips.

“Oh please, wouldn't you like to know,” Todomatsu rolled his eyes, “I'll probably get their numbers tonight.”

“What? Bullshit! I bet you can't!” Osomatsu laughed, “You're going with more than one, right?”

“Well excuse me for having more social skills than you guys,” Todomatsu crossed his arms, “There's even one girl who's known at work for sending pictures of her boobs out.”

A lie, all lies. But he didn't care. He loved seeing their jealous expressions.

“Fine! If you can't get at least one girl’s number, then I'll let you have the remote on the tv for a week!” Osomatsu crossed his arms confidently.

Todomatsu wanted to scream. 1) Osomatsu always made shitty bets. 2) He wasn't meeting girls tonight. He’d have to just use his manager’s number as a decoy when he got home. “Alright! You're on!” He confidently hummed as he left for Chibita’s.

By the time he got to Chibita’s stand, Todomatsu was already 10 times happier to see Jyushimatsu for dinner. He was early but no matter, he'd get his food first. When he saw Jyushimatsu come over the hill down to Chibita’s stand, he gave him a small wave to welcome him while Chibita served the elder some food.

“What did the others say about you coming to eat out?” Todomatsu asked curiously, glancing at him briefly between bites.

“Choromatsu-niisan thinks this is a trap but Karamatsu wanted to come!” Jyushimatsu answered honestly, making the younger hate this divorce even more.

“Heehee! So lame! I lied and told the others I'm going to eat with some girls. Osomatsu and Ichimatsu were so jealous!” the youngest giggled, hiding his annoyance.

“Can I ask about that? You guys are so troublesome together and seem to be worst separated! What gives?” Chibita questioned curiously.

“Mom and Dad got a divorce and Mom picked who she wanted to take with her! Dad got the leftovers!” Todomatsu sighed, “But it's so annoying! I'm stuck now with Osomatsu and Ichimatsu! They're smelly and gross! At least Karamatsu and Choromatsu were tidy!”

“Haha! They're kind of quiet but they're nice! I miss Ichimatsu-niisan and Osomatsu-niisan, though!” Jyushimatsu nodded between bites.

“I hate to say it but I kind of miss you guys, too… This is so stupid! What did mom and dad fight about, anyways?” Todomatsu huffed with a puff of his cheeks.

“Mom’s flat and Dad’s bad at sex? I don't know!” Jyushimatsu joked bluntly, “It's kind of lame!”

“Have you guys tried to talk your parents into getting together if you hate it so much?” Chibita asked, sitting back to drink his water.

“We tried to talk them out of all of this but they were pretty set!” Todomatsu sighed, “We could try again but… Now that we’re separated, isn't it kind of hard?”

“Well there's a movie out there called uh… Trap Parent? Parent Trap? I don't know, but it's kind of the same as what's going on? These two twin girls were separated at birth and meet at camp. Then they switch places when it's time to go home so that they can see what the other parent is like and then they get their parents back together in some huge plot…” Chibita thought back.

“Oh! Yeah! We’ve seen that! There's only a few good movies out there involving twins and the old one is pretty cool!” Todomatsu nodded eagerly. There honestly were rarely any movies that showed twins nicely.

“Totty! Let's trade then! It's easy! We did it when we were kids!” Jyushimatsu bounced in his spot, “Then I can hang with Ichimatsu-niisan and Osomatsu-niisan!”

“Ok! Sure! It can't be that hard to be you! And then during the day when you go to practice and I go to work we can just be ourselves!” Todomatsu nodded. It was honestly the best idea he's heard in awhile. He was almost too giddy at the idea of seeing the other brothers casually with no worries of this divorce.

“Yeah! You just got to have Muscle Muscle!” Jyushimatsu nodded, “And then we can think of a way to get everyone together!”

Jyushimatsu and Todomatsu laughed in agreeance together as they hatched up their new plan. Once they finished eating, Todomatsu and Jyushimatsu moved to a public bathroom to switch clothes. Next they took time to fix each other’s hair while practicing each other’s expressions. Honestly, it was hard to keep such a wide open smile. It hurt his cheeks to fake a smile for more than necessary, especially when there wasn't ever a direct cause to smile. He was thankful that Jyushimatsu noticed his struggle, at least.

“Tomorrow! You can wear my jumpsuit and zip it up so it covers your mouth!” Jyushimatsu offered to help him.

“Thank goodness… Maybe it'll help them not see how I've got cuter cheeks while you're kinda more angular. It's going to take some serious makeup magic to copy you really well,” Todomatsu sighed in relief. He wasn't excited to have to breathe in the sweaty smells of Jyushimatsu but he knew it'd make life easier in the end.

With that, “Todomatsu” and “Jyushimatsu” went “home”. It was a little odd for Todomatsu to go “home” and smell ordered pizza instead of a home cooked meal. Did none of them know how to cook? He wanted to scrunch his nose up as he realized there was a particular guy smell in the home. He figured it was because Jyushimatsu worker out a lot, Karamatsu covered himself in shit cologne, their father was no better, and Choromatsu barely did any variations to make his appearance a higher standard. He was sourly reminded why he was glad his Mother chose him with her polite feminine hygiene and why he was mad he had to sleep next to Ichimatsu at night.

He was thankfully greeted by the two older Matsunos around the table relaxing while their father was reading the newspaper. Good. No direct glances his way right off the bat when he tried to get his bearings straight.

“Oh! Brother! Welcome home!” Karamatsu smiled as he looked up from his magazine, sticky note in hand.

“What did Todomatsu want?” Choromatsu glanced up from his own book.

“He tried to ask me how you guys were!” He imitated Jyushimatsu’s voice, struggling to keep it at such a low pitch. He hated that Jyushimatsu and Karamatsu both had such low voices. It was too hard to keep it sounding right.

“Oh? That's nice of him,” Karamatsu smiled, “Of course our dearest little brother would miss his big brothers!” Todomatsu wanted to bat at him and remind him he wasn't some baby.

“That's weird… Since when did he care about how we were? Oh well, he didn't try to mess with you much, right?” Choromatsu shrugged Karamatsu off with a concerned look.

“Nope! Just wanted food!” Todomatsu shrugged and took Jyushimatsu’s shoes off. He then moved to sit with the others, honestly enjoying being around them again. They kept him grounded and he was thankful for it.

That is, till Karamatsu grabbed his chin to make him look at the elder. He felt gross as Karamatsu studied him for a solid moment behind his shades.

“What's the matter?” Choromatsu gave a curious look their way.

“Jyushimatsu, you haven't slacked off, right? You look… different?” Karamatsu questioned him. Damn. He was pointing out his baby fat that he still had on his cheeks.

“No way!” Todomatsu stood away from him, flexing his arms with Jyushimatsu’s overly long sleeves, “Muscle! Muscle! Hustle! Hustle!”

“He does look kind of weird…” Choromatsu scrunched his nose, “And are you wearing perfume?”

“Totty hugged me goodbye!” He quickly covered his tracks. Damn these brothers who actually cared about such small details compared to the other two lazy bums.

“I see… Are you really Jyushimatsu, though?” Karamatsu stared up at him.

“What else would I be? I'm not Karamatsu-niisan or Choromatsu-niisan! So I must be Jyushimatsu!” That sounded like something he'd say, right?

“Alright… I guess that makes sense,” Karamatsu nodded, “Well then, welcome home. We’re kind of all trying to read. You can grab one of your comics if you want.”

“Ok! I will!” Todomatsu nodded, quickly moving to the hall to look for their room. Once he found it, he began rummaging for Jyushimatsu’s stuff and found a bug encyclopedia. It wasn't exciting but he could at least pretend to be interested till it was time for bed. He was just happier for a new breath of air.