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Izuku does not have an eating disorder. That’s what he tells himself as he looks down at the plate of well seasoned, homemade food.
“S-Sorry, kacchan. I don’t feel very hungry today.”
“The fuck you don’t, don’t bullshit me De-Izuku. I haven’t seen you eat all day.” Katsuki replied.
“I did eat! I…I ate early in the morning when we weren’t together. Don’t worry.” The slim boy argued.
Bakugo scoffed and began to take both their plates to wash them. Leaving izuku relieved.
It did only start as Izuku realizing he needed to cut down on all the junk food he was eating, it was healthy. He gained self control and he liked it. He liked having control over what, when and where he ate.
But slowly, the more Izuku saw results in his cut backs, the more he felt obligated to keep going. He was getting thinner, thinner was good! His classmates and family began commenting on his newfound body too, “Wow, izuku you look a lot stronger!” his Mum would praise. “Your waist is so small ‘zuku! God, what id do for a body like yours.” Mina would tell him.
Things were better, skinnier meant prettier, skinnier meant healthier. But it went from falling back on sugar to hardly eating a meal a day. He kept tabs on his calorie intake, subtly scanning the qr codes on packs of food to check if they were suited for how much food he’d already ate.
Nobody seemed to notice it either, not really. Only Bakugou would ask him if he’s been eating enough when he’d skip out on another meal.
——————
It was lunch time in the cafeteria at UA, Izuku had already had his one proper meal of the day so he’d had to give up the one snack he’d allow himself per day at lunch so nobody got suspicious.
“Midoriya, is that all you’re going to eat?” Iida asked. The green haired boy froze.
“What? Oh yeah, t-this is all i need for today. Not feeling very well.” He responded.
“If you say so. But you need to remember that it is of the most utmost importance to keep a maintained and balanced diet, if you’re only eating little things like—”
Izuku tuned the rest of what Iida was saying out, he didn’t know what he was talking about. Midoriya doesn’t need balanced meals to be healthy. If he doesn’t eat, then he can’t eat badly. That’s healthy.
——————
As it got dark and as Izuku was heading to his dorm room, Bakugou stopped him while he was walking along the corridor.
“‘Zu, i’m worried about you.” He stated.
“Why? There’s nothing wrong, Kacchan. I’ve told you again and again, i’m fine.”
“I don’t believe you. I stopped believing you a while ago Izuku. I never see you eat anything and when i do it’s one tiny meal and then nothing else, and you barely even finish. Tell me the truth, please.”
Midoriya’s mouth went dry, if people begun to notice his lack of eating then they’d make him stop. They’d make him eat 3 meals a day, they’d make him stop counting.
“I-I do eat. As y-you said you see me eat all the time! Seriously, k-kacchan. I’m fine. Now i’m really tired so can you move away please.” Izuku looked like he was about to cry.
Katsuki allowed Izuku to go into his room but instead of going to his own he followed behind the shorter boy and sat on his bed.
“It’s not just that, Zuku. You look sick. You don’t look healthy and you haven’t for months now. Your skin is so pale it could be registered as an invisibility quirk, your eyes are puffy and you have engraved bags. You look like you haven’t slept properly in days.” Bakugou said, his words harsh but his tone soft.
Izuku’s eyes blinked slowly, he suddenly couldn’t remember if he’d eaten at all that day.. had he had his one meal? He couldn’t remember anymore. He felt dizzy. Really, really dizzy.
“Ka-Kacchn’, i-i think i’m gonna-“
He dropped to the floor and his eyes shut. He could only hear faint shouting from Katsuki as his ears ringed out. His ears had been doing that a lot recently too. Huh. He wondered if that was ‘healthy’.
——————
The next time Izuku woke up he was in his bed, Aizawa was sat on a chair next to him and Bakugou was sat in what looked like a very uncomfortable spot at the end of his bed.
“Hm?…What happened? Kacchan?” Izuku slurred.
“Shh, shh. You shouldn’t talk so quick Midoriya. You fainted from not eating enough. Your blood sugars were dangerously low. Take it easy.” Aizawa answered.
Oh, he fainted. He wasn’t that surprised in all honestly. He had been feeling pretty faint the past few weeks, whenever he stood up too quick or even at all, his vision would blur and his ears would ring loudly. Izuku just dismissed it all as the fasting cutting back working.
Midoriya turned to face Katsuki who had a very depressing look on his face. “Izuku…I’m so happy you’re awake. I was so worried.” He leaned over to izuku to embrace him into a hug, a bit out of character for Katsuki but Izuku accepted it nonetheless.
“Midoriya, i’ve set you up with counseling sessions with one of the eating disorder experts at UA for every few days.” Aizawa let out a sigh. He sounded disappointed. “I’m happy you’re now awake but, Midoriya. Why have you been starving yourself?”
The question felt a little unreal to Izuku. He hadn’t been “starving himself”.. He was just cutting back. He was getting healthier.
At least he thought he was.
“I…I wanted..” Midoriyas breath hitched.
“I wanted t-to look… better. I wanted to be skinnier. I started working out more but it wasn’t enough. I wanted people to comment on how thin i was.” His eyes started to puff up.
“I-I hate how i look! I-I hate it so much! I want to look like the other people i-in our class. I wanna be p-pretty enough for somebody to like me. I just want to be pretty.” Izukus hands clutched at his hair as tears stained his no-longer chubby cheeks.
Bakugou scooted closer to him.
“Izuku, I think you’re pretty. I think you’re the prettiest in the class, in the world. But, this-“
Bakugou scanned izuku up and down.
“this paleness- this sickly look, it isn’t you. It isn’t your true beauty. I loved how you looked long before your ridiculous cutbacks. I always did.”
Izuku didn’t stop crying.
“And i hate it. I hate seeing you want to change yourself so much for others when your honest, true self is perfect. It’s more than perfect. So please, can you tell me that you’ll try to get better? Please. For me.” Katsuki finished.
“hic O-Okay, Kacchan. I-I’ll try for you.”