Chapter Text
Shen Qingqiu could safely say that he hadn’t expected his day to go this way. He could say with absolute and utter security, in the privacy of his own thoughts, that he certainly didn’t mind how is day was going, however.
Which was to say that apparently this Peak Lord meeting was going to be taking a break because the universe, or more likely, a wife plot had decided to visit Liu Qingge and opted to divest him of his clothing. Honestly, he didn’t understand how he could have missed the lead up to this. His poor shidi’s clothes had definitely never just fallen apart before, no matter how ruffled he was when he showed up!
He didn’t even realize he was staring, rather unabashedly, until Luo Binghe, his poor, maidenly husband, made a pained noise and threw himself at the man to cover him up. Ah. Well. He tipped his head slowly to stare at him instead, cheeks flushed and gaze a bit apologetic, only to get a wobbly pout for his efforts. He’d definitely noticed then. Hello fan, he loves you, please protect his tattered dignity because he clearly had no face left.
Liu Qingge had no such grace, and while red with embarrassment everywhere still visible, immediately shoved at poor Luo Binghe anyway. “Get off me!”
Luo Binghe, for his part, was far more determined to cover him up, and worked around the shoving to stuff him into his robe. It made the other man look dainty. “Liu-shishu shouldn’t be so shameless!”
“I wasn’t- Fine! Just get off! I can do it myself.” With a last hard shove to get the taller man to release him, Liu Qingge yanked the robe properly into place, scowling all the while. “Happy? Why are you even here?”
“Why is Liu-shishu wandering around half dressed?”
“I was entirely dressed when I came in here!” There was a beat of intense eye contact between them, something which he was following with avid interest when he had to jerk his attention to his side upon feeling a sharp elbow in his ribs.
Of course it was Shang Qinghua. Why the man was interrupting though, he had no idea. He kept his voice down as the bickering near the door started to pick up a familiar cadence, though it might have sounded more like a hiss than a whisper. “What?”
Clearly seeing his irritation on his face, the smaller man quickly held up his hands in placation before scooting in closer and speaking quietly, low enough to not be overheard. “Wife plots? That new or...?”
He peeked over at the argument, which Yue Qingyuan had apparently joined, then looked away again, back at Shang Qinghua. “No, I don’t think so. There was that succubus thing back when Binghe was gone, and several other things between then and now. I honestly hadn’t thought much of it given it was, well.” He waved his hand to encompass the world.
“Ah, yeah. So. If it’s gotten to this point you might want to do something about it before things go the other way and he, you know. Ends up at death’s door?”
Shen Qingqiu could feel his eyes widen and he leaned in, alarmed. “What? Why would he?”
“Yes, why would he?” What neither of them was expecting was for Mu Qingfang to lean over Shang Qinghua’s shoulder and join the conversation. Which apparently they’d either not been quiet enough about or, well. He didn’t know what or. It was enough that they immediately gave the man their full attention either way.
“Um. Mu-shidi, I wasn’t expecting you to jump in there. Ah ha so. Nothing important! Really, no big deal!”
Mu Qingfang, far from the apologies of that long ago day when they’d met, now had a serene intensity about him instead. Shen Qingqiu couldn’t even imagine when that had happened. It suited the man though. “I think you’ll find, Shang-shixiong, that anything that involves one of you ending up at death’s door to be a very big deal.”
Still, the argument at the door seemed to be winding down, which meant this conversation should too. Frantically searching for the nearest excuse that made sense, he opted for something that sounded like it could be reasonable, raising his voice a little to stress the point. It was no big deal, believe him! “We just think that Liu Qingge might have a marriage curse on him.”
He just could have timed it better. “What? You think I have a what on me?”
“Shizun! When did Shizun start to think that about Liu-shishu?”
Namely, when the other three hadn’t just fallen quiet, essentially.
Nope, absolutely not.
Before anyone could say anything else, he was on his feet and heading out the other door. Opting to go through the little adjoining kitchen to the meeting space and escape that way. He was not going to subject himself to explaining that to the rest of the Peak Lords at this meeting. No way, no sir, no how.
It was a good choice. He could hear Shang Qinghua quickly attempting to explain as noise exploded in the room behind him, but when he heard footsteps following he just made his own go more quickly. He was still not above running away from his problems, thank you very much!
Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, he’d married one of said problems and when he felt a familiar hand on his back, he just sighed, hiding his face in his fan. “Shizun didn’t have to run away and leave this Binghe behind, he would have helped him go through the normal door!”
“It wasn’t you this master was worried about.” He peeked over, cautious, only to squeak when he realized that Luo Binghe hadn’t come alone, and had Liu Qingge at his other side. “Binghe!”
“He’s wearing this one’s clothes, Shizun! If he just left him behind there he never would have seen them again!”
That made the man in question scoff, but he didn’t disagree, which was it’s own issue. “The curse?”
“Ah... I’m sure that Shang-shidi is explaining that right now...?”
“I would rather hear it from you.”
A glance at Luo Binghe showed that no help would be coming from that corner, strangely enough, and the man actually looked solemnly serious. Was he worried? Were these two friends after all? It was enough to make him soften over the whole thing. “Liu-shidi knows that he often ends up with aphrodisiacs and in situations that might be awkward?” He flicked his fan at him to indicate his current state.
“I’ve noticed. My cultivation is high enough to ignore it.”
“I know. But it’s been going on for years now, and it’s only getting worse, right?” When the shorter man looked away, flushing, Shen Qingqiu nodded to himself. Right. Okay. “Well, that’s the kind of thing that indicates a curse, doesn’t it?”
“Mu-shidi would have noticed.”
“Not all curses are the kind that can be noticed that easily.”
“Shizun?” Something about Luo Binghe’s tone had him turning his gaze back to him, curious. “What makes it marriage and not just, ah.”
“Right. If it was just sex, then it would only be things like passion flowers, not things like this.” He flicked his fan at his shidi again, and the man’s gaze finally returned to him. “This is more about vulnerability than sex.”
“I’m not vulnerable right now.”
“You’re only dressed because Binghe gave you his robe. It’s the appearance of it, if not the truth. But, my point. What me and Shang-shidi were talking about was the fact that curses like this tend to just intensify over time until the person ends up married, or in a situation that’s so direly sex or death that they just, well, die. It probably won’t come to that. We could be misreading the signs entirely.”
“But Shizun doesn’t think he is. He thinks Liu-shishu might die from this?” Given the way the two fought Shen Qingqiu thought that Luo Binghe would have been happy about this! But no, never happy, this man. Instead, he sounded almost upset! Make up your mind!
“Ah... that’s…” He trailed off, at a loss, as the two made eye contact, staring at each other in tense silence for several long moments before the older of the two looked at him instead, searching his face for something, though he had no idea what.
“Fine.”
Shen Qingqiu thought he could be forgiven for his confusion, and alarm, given the last question that had been asked. “What?”
“I said fine. If that’s what’s going on.” He turned his head and made eye contact with Luo Binghe again, lips pressed into a line. “Demon.”
Luo Binghe looked no more pleased than his shishu, though he also looked relieved. “Liu-shishu.”
“Fine?”
“Yes, fine.”
“What’s fine?” Had his Shidi just resolved himself to death? He hadn’t agreed to that! He hadn’t been expecting him to do that at all! He didn’t understand how anyone could be relieved about it!
Luo Binghe saved him from his rising concern, at least, and turned his attention to him, rubbing his back where his hand was resting. “Does Shizun agree too? His agreement is most important.”
“What am I even agreeing to right now?”
Looking away from them both with a warm flush over his face, Liu Qingge stared off the side of the bridge with fixed intensity. “This. If I have to, then you two are... fine.”
He really was tragically pretty, wasn’t he? He’d thought so before, and he would think so again, he was sure. Of course, then what he was saying trickled in and he felt a moment of absolute confusion. “Wait. Did I miss something?” Had Liu Qingge just chosen his death?!
“He’s offering to be a wife in this marriage to satisfy the curse, Shizun.”
Jerking his gaze to his husband and feeling wildly wrong footed about all this, he felt his eyebrows raise high. That wasn’t at all what he thought was happening! “And you’re fine with this?” Was his stallion blood finally coming to the fore? After so long?
“This Binghe would not wish to see Liu Qingge dead, and he knows Shizun cares about him... a great deal.” Something about the way he said that made him squint, but his husband didn’t give him a chance to question him on it, instead hurrying to continue. “If it would set Shizun’s heart at ease, and ensure someone that this Binghe understands is not endangered by untraceable things, then this is what he is willing to do.”
“Well? Yes or no. If it’s no we can just forget we ever spoke about this.”
Reminded of the cause for this topic, and feeling weirdly rushed, he looked at his shidi, the man who was here because he’d saved him all those years ago. “Liu-shidi, are you sure? What if you meet someone and fall in love in the future? Is it worth not waiting? You have time.”
“It’s fine like this.” Liu Qingge looked between them and huffed out a sharp breath, lifting his chin. “I’m not going to change my mind. It’s you or no one.”
How did he keep ending up in these situations? Shen Qingqiu looked at Liu Qingge, who appeared resolved but also weirdly peaceful about this, then at his husband, at his beautiful, perfect Luo Binghe, and saw a steely determination, but no conflict. He didn’t seem upset about this, had agreed. Just what had been going on lately?
What had he missed?
He looked back at Liu Qingge after studying his husband’s face for several more long, quiet moments. “If you’re really sure.”
“I am.”
“Then I suppose we all have some planning to do. I’d be honored to welcome you into our family, Liu-shidi.”
“Qingge.”
Somehow, this was what made Shen Qingqiu finally blush, rather than remaining unphased due to his confusion. “...Qingge.”
Luo Binghe, clearly having had enough of the whole thing, just pushed with the hand at the small of his back, grabbed the sleeve of the robe that Liu Qingge was wearing, and started walking, steering them both to Qing Jing. His poor lamb, so stressed, so self sacrificing.
At least your Shishu is beautiful, Binghe! You could have really done much worse for a second wife!
He just had to resolve himself to make sure that his poor husband didn’t end up falling into the bad habit of quantity over quality in the future if this was the start of something. He was sure Liu Qingge would help!
Especially given why he was agreeing in the first place.