Archive of Our Own

Yoongi is in a bit of a predicament.

Actually, predicament is an understatement. He has huge fucking problem.

Well, for most it is not that big of a deal. Some people will even say he's over complicating it. That he will get over it soon. That he doesn't need to worry too much.

But these people just don't get it.

Maybe if he realized sooner what he was feeling before it was too big to deny it or to keep it under control without anybody noticing it. Maybe if he knew sooner, he could've stopped these interactions so this wouldn't grow as big as it is right now.

So yeah, It is a big deal. It's a huge deal actually. So enormous that he doesn't know what to do with all of this. And with all of this, he means:

He's in love. Head over heels. Weak in the knees. Helplessly and pathetically and totally smitten.

With Jung Hoseok. With his best friend, out of all people.

Ok maybe, maybe he's exaggerating ("you are being a little dramatic, hyung" had said Namjoon when he told him). It's not as bad as he's making it seem. He reckons that he chose the best person in the world to fall for. The most selfless, loving, sweetest angel. The person who probably animals will follow around (and actually ducks followed him around! That one time when they went to the park and Hoseok wanted to feed some little ducks and when he succeeded with the biggest smile "Look hyung! They're following me!" Yoongi could not stop himself from falling if he wanted to. He didn't want to). The prettiest man he's ever seen. For real though, who the hell has a heart for a smile? And cute little dimples? And man his laugh. He's sure that every time Hoseok laughs, a fairy is born (and he doesn't even believe in fairies).

Still, Yoongi thinks he failed him. That he betrayed his trust. That he mistakenly took his friendly words and touches and fell for him.

Yoongi wasn't touch starved. He knows Jimin and Taehyung. You can't really avoid contact if they're in the same room as you. But you see, he wasn't that much of a touchy person to begin with. He always showed how much he cared through actions. He would give some words of encouragement and a pat on the back at last and that would be it.

Does this all mean that he hates when people touch him? Or hug him? Or hold his hand? Well, not really (read: Not all actually). He secretly loves it. He even craves it. Will he ever admit that out loud though? Never.

Does this mean he hates when Hoseok specifically is touchy with him? A big and bold No. He loves it. He would never ever in a million years deny his friend's touch. He thinks he could never deny Hoseok anything actually.

That's probably why he's like this in the first place. Touches. Sweet, sweet touches. Lovely and warm arms around his shoulders, around his waist. Delicate fingers making shapeless forms on his skin. Long and fleeting ones. Tight, so tight that even after some time he still feels breathless. Or loose, quick ones that he feels like he imagined them. Some so safe he probably shaped a place in Hoseok's arms, only for him to stay. Hands finding each other without them noticing, without their permission. Interlocking and staying as close as possible, no letting even the wind go through their union.

At first, they weren't as noticeable. Just quick hellos and goodbyes arms. Fleeting and brief. Sometimes they lasted a little bit more.

Like that one at the party Seokjin had in his apartment, where he invited all of them to celebrate him getting his first job after graduation or some shit. You don't really question Seokjin's decision, you just follow them.

"You have to come, Yoongi-ya, everyone is coming" had say Seokjin on the phone, putting a strange emphasis on the word. Yoongi narrowed his eyes.

"Why did you say it like that?" Yoongi asked, confused. "Also, who on earth does a party on a wednesday?"

"Details" He exclaimed dismissively. Yoongi sighs loudly. "Don't worry though, your boyfriend will be there so you don't get too lonely"

"Hoseok is not my boyfriend," He adds quickly.

"Funny thing, i didn't even say his name but you immediately thought it was Hoseok-ah"

"Shut up." He could hear Seokjin's laugh and then a quick Don't be late and the sound of the end of the call. He sighs again looking at his black screen. His friends kept teasing him about his crush. He always hoped they weren't too obvious in front of Hoseok when all of them were together, but luckily, Hoseok never seems to notice.

The party is nothing big. It's actually pretty chill, just the seven of them and some of Seokjin's classmates he is closest to. And of course there is food and beer.

"By the way, did you know Hyung wrote another love song for Hoseok-hyung?" says Jungkook. Him, Jimin and Yoongi were in a small circle catching up while drinking a bottle each.

Yoongi almost chokes on his drink.

"Really?" asks Jimin, wiggling his eyebrows at him.

"It's not-"

"I couldn't really see the lyrics well because hyung catched me before i could look at it,"Jungkook interrupts him, also wiggling his eyebrows with a knowing smile.

"It's not really done yet. It was barely a draft" says Yoongi glaring jokingly at Jungkook. He could never really get mad at Jungkook if he's completely honest.

"Wow, not even denying it anymore. He has accepted his crush." Jimin says with a knowing smile. They both giggle and try to hide it behind their hands just like they were some kind of characters in a cartoon. It's endearing and annoying at the same time.

"What crush?" And speaking of the devil.

Looking as gorgeous as ever with the most lovely smile, Hoseok comes and stands beside Yoongi. He puts his arm around Yoongi's shoulder and squeezes gently. He gives him a softer version of his usual smile. He keeps giving him those, with a touch of sparkle in his eyes. A smile reserved only for him.

"It's nothing, don't worry," Yoongi says before any of those say anything about the song and he gives Jungkook a look to shut him up. Jungkook gives him his biggest bunny smile and giggles. "Hobah, do you want a drink? Jungkook will bring you something" He says trying to change the subject but could still see Hoseok looking hesitant.

"Oh, that will be great actually, thanks JK," Hoseok says smiling at the younger of their group. Jungkook sighs, makes some type of salute to Hoseok and goes to the kitchen.

"I'll go with him to bring more food, by the way, nice to see you, hyung!" says Jimin while winking at Yoongi and then goes towards the direction that Jungkook went. Hoseok waves at him.

"Did I interrupt something?" asks Hoseok. He looks at Yoongi but he looks down trying to hide his smile.

"No, you saved me actually. They were being annoying" says Yoongi with no real bite. He doesn't know how but he can feel Hoseok smiling at him in his next words.

"You're welcome, hyungie"

He can still feel Hoseok's arm around his shoulder even after some time. Actually, he never let go of him. Whenever he changes the circle of people he was talking to, he keeps bringing Yoongi with him like he was some sort of extension of him.

And Yoongi? Well, he doesn't mind one bit.

He loves that he could feel him like this. The warmth that only Hoseok radiates. Even though he keeps dragging him around Seokjin's house, his touch is soft like he was a delicate vase that if you were too rough with it, you could break it. He is always like this with him. Soft touches, soft eyes looking at him with a soft smile adorning his face.

Thanks to the closeness, he can smell Hoseok's cologne, like he was breathing in Hoseok. It was so addicting, he feels like he is getting drunk off of Hoseok rather than the beer long forgotten in his hand.

He spends the whole night beside him, trying to hide the blush on his cheeks and the knowing looks from his friends he hopes Hoseok doesn't pay attention to.

"We need to take photos!" Seokjin calls everyone sometime close to midnight. First it was the turn of his college friends. He makes them take more than one photo to remember this night. After taking some, then they started saying their goodbyes. "You guys too, you're not getting away" He said while looking at Yoongi, who just rolls his eyes and goes to his right side.

Of course, Hoseok is still there holding him.

At the last second of the countdown, Hoseok looked at him and then kissed his cheek softly. His lips barely touched the skin but that didn't prevent the warmth that spread, without his permission, all over his face, down his neck and lastly to his chest, bringing warm all over him.

His face on the photos must've looked ridiculous (And it did, with his eyes wide open and red face when he later checked out).

After the photos were taken, he could not look Hoseok in the eye. He could feel his eyes looking for him, trying to catch his reaction but he quickly excused himself and went to the bathroom and closed the door.

He tried to calm down, pouring water on his cheeks and neck and breath in and out.

Holy shit.

The part of his face where he kissed him was still tingling with the ghost of Hoseok's lips. He touched his cheek softly where Hoseok's lips were not even 5 minutes ago. It was hardly a kiss, a mere peck on the right side of his face, very close to his ear. But still.

If I'm reacting like this over some peck, what will happen when he kisses me for real.

Like that will happen. Sure. It was just for the photo.

Yeah, just the photo. Right.

He can't really forget the incident. Even after some time has passed, he still feels the lips that made contact with his skin, like they were tattooed on his face with some kind of clear ink. He embarrassedly sometimes touches his cheek like he's some 12 year old who just got a kiss from his crush.

Sadly after that happened, Hoseok doesn't try to kiss him again. Or do anything of that sort. He goes to the quick side hugs again, which of course doesn't go unnoticed by Yoongi.

He thinks he made you uncomfortable, which is not exactly what happened. It took him by surprise, that's all. But at the same time, he doesn't think he can get used to the kisses. Whether they're a prank or just for a pose, he just can't. That would be too much for his poor heart.

Next time where he feels like their dynamic changed a little was during their trip to Pyeongchang.

The seven of them went together to have some rest time with nature. The place was nice and got everything for the seven of them to enjoy their stay and not worry about anything. They all got their own rooms, which was great.

The very few first days were lazy and everyone was doing their own thing really. They always tried to eat lunch or dinner together though. And it was fun and easy. Yoongi really really really loved his friends. He felt very thankful he found this loving family.

On their third night, he made them dinner and served it. All of them were together outside, since the weather was pretty nice and without the pollution light that the city provided, you could see the sky full of stars.

Between them all eating and laughing, he couldn't really take his eyes off of his biggest and most shining star.

The sky is a mere sketch besides the work of art that is Hoseok's smile. He firmly believes that everyone should see his framed smile in a museum.

He knows he is staring, can anyone blame him?

Can someone really not look at the light that is Hoseok?

He tries to look somewhere else, but it is a damn hard task. He tries worrying about his food but the second the sound of his giggles hit his ears, he can't help but stare at him. He hopes everyone else is more engaged in their conversation and not in the heart eyes he knows damn well he is making.

He's glad when Taehyung brings beer and he can actually distract himself with his drink.

Yoongi felt relaxed after that, like he was on a cloud in the sky. Everything seemed easy and uncomplicated. Perhaps this trip is what he needed.

After dinner, he went to do the dishes but Taehyung was already putting his gloves on.

"Do you want some help with that?" he asks.

"Nope. You already made dinner for us," He starts cleaning the plates. "I can do this."

"I can dry while you wash then" He suggests instead. He didn't feel like going to bed yet. Taehyung pouts but ends up nodding.

"If you insist, okay," They start their respective tasks in silence with Taehyung humming from time to time. He smiles. It reminded him of a certain someone.

He always liked Hoseok's little cute sounds.

"You could tell him, you know" Taehyung interrupts his thoughts. He stops drying the plate he was holding for a moment but then continues.

"Tell who what?" He feigns ignorance.

"That you like him, he wouldn't be mad at you or something" Taehyung says softly. He gives him a sad smile. He didn't think Hoseok would get mad at him, but it could damage their friendship and he didn't want that. He didn't want to lose what they have.

"I don't want him to hate me" He answers honestly.

Taehyung raises an eyebrow at that.

"Please, Hoseok-hyung is incapable of hating anyone," Taehyung replies while giving him a 'Are you being for real right now?' look. "And we are talking about you, you're literally his favorite hyung, he would never hate you"

While he has to admit Taehyung is right, Hoseok wouldn't hate him, especially him, he is afraid of what can happen if he ever confesses. He doesn't think he can take the rejection even though he knows Hoseok would be nice about it. It would break him.

"Why are we even talking about this?" he asks.

"Fine, but you should tell him one day, i think he will like that" Taehyung gives him a soft smile and gives him a hug. Yoongi wiggles in his hug but chuckles.

"Maybe" Taehyung lets him go and goes back to his task of washing the dishes. They work in silence again but it's not uncomfortable, it's nice.

When they're done with the dishes, he bids his goodbye and goes to his room.

While he brushes his teeth, he goes back to their conversation. I think he would like that. What did he even mean by that? He would like what? Him confessing? Please.

He can't go there. He can't get his hopes up like that. He knows getting in that headspace would only make him hurt more once the inevitable comes.

He shakes his head and finishes brushing and then washes his face and maybe because he wasn't that tired to go to bed yet, he puts on one of the sheet masks that was there for them to use. He took the moisturizing avocado one. It sounded nice. Then, he goes to bed to wait for it to work while he watches some cat videos.

He was almost asleep, when a knock woke him up. It wasn't a loud one so it probably wasn't any of the younger ones. Maybe it was Namjoon. Namjoon would just text you, though. Right. Maybe his hyung wanted something.

"Hyung, i swear i don't-" Yoongi stopped in his words when the sight of one distressed Jung Hoseok was revealed. Hoseok tried to smile but it looked weird.

"Hi, hyung. Oh, doing facials? Do you mind if i join you? If that's okay with you, of course" This time his smile looked more genuine.

"Right, I almost forgot I had this on," He touched his face and then saw Hoseok was still at the door, so he opened it wider. "Come on in, and yes we can do the masks, of course. Like old times" Hoseok giggled and entered the room. "They're in the bathroom, by the way. Pick whichever you like, I'll wait for you here" He told him while closing the door and went back to bed.

"Okayyy" Hoseok said in a cute tone and went to the bathroom.

Now that he was in his room he felt a little bit more awake. He didn't tell him why he was here, but knowing him he would know sooner or later. It was always the former, Hoseok is someone that doesn't keep something up for long.

He didn't think he looked so bad, but decided to check on the camera app. He looked fine besides some hairs on the back. He hoped it was cute because no amount of trying to flatten it out worked right now and he couldn't really go to the bathroom to fix it.

"I'm doneee" Hoseok came back sliding and with a shy version of jazz hands. He looked really cute with the sheet mask on. "Now we're matching!" He gave him his pretty heart smile.

Well, maybe Yoongi just thought every little thing Hoseok did was adorable. And who would blame him? He's sure if you looked at the definition of the word cute, a photo of Hoseok would be there next to it.

Hoseok really makes it hard not to fall for him.

"Yes, we are," Yoongi added lamely. Hoseok got close to the bed and Yoongi made a space to sit next to him, which Hoseok did. The bed wasn't huge but it was big enough for two people to lay down without being too close to each other. But that won't do for Hoseok. He got close enough to him that his shoulders and thighs touched. Hoseok let out a sigh and closed his eyes for a moment. Yoongi took that as his chance to look at him. He looked serene. Peaceful.

"Do i have something on my face?" Hoseok giggled at his little joke and opened one of his eyes to look at Yoongi. "You're staring, you know"

"Sorry" Yoongi diverted his eyes to somewhere else in the room.

"It's fine. I don't mind," He added shyly. What the hell. "And thanks for letting me stay"

"Of course, you're always welcome," He said.

"Careful, i might crash here the rest of our stay," Hoseok gave him a smirk and a wink. He lied. Not everything Hoseok does is cute. Some things are very dangerous for his heart. He let out a sigh. He pushed Hoseok softly for the theatrics and loved the laugh he received from him.

"Don't" He said jokingly. While that idea was tempting, he's not sure his heart could take Hoseok on his bed every night for the rest of the trip. "Would love for you to enlighten me with the reason for you to come crash here and not at Jimin's"

"For starters, he's the reason I'm here" Yoongi quirked an eyebrow at that "i would never trust him again"

"What did he even do?" He tried so hard to contain his giggles but it was in vain.

"Don't laugh at me!" He said with the most adorable pout ever.

"I'm not" He tried to give him an innocent smile, but could see Hoseok looking through him. "Tell me please"

"Him and Jungkook forced me to watch this movie, right? But just forgot to mention the tiny little detail that it was a horror movie" Yoongi couldn't hold his giggles anymore imagining the face Hoseok probably had when he realized what the movie was about. When he looked at Hoseok again, he could see his pout had intensified. He looked very very very cute. "Don't laugh at me" He said, whining.

"I'm sorry"

"Anyways, i thought you would let me stay here with you" He said looking almost shy. His heart started racing; he was afraid Hoseok could feel it thanks to their closeness. "Of course, you can kick me out-"

"You can stay" He's sure that if they weren't so close, Hoseok wouldn't have heard him. "Just don't kick me or something while you're sleeping and we're all good" Hoseok let out a giggle. He grabbed his hand and gave it a soft squeeze.

"I promise i won't" He didn't dare to look at him but he could hear his smile through his words. It sounded breathtaking.

He's sure that if Hoseok couldn't hear his heart before, he could hear it now for how loud it was, like it didn't want to make its presence go unnoticed.

"Do you think we should take these off?" He said trying to change the subject to something safe. The sheet masks were safe.

"I think so" He checked his phone for the time and then looked at Yoongi again, grabbing his hands. "Wait! Let me do it" He slowly removed the sheet mask from Yoongi's face and threw it in the trash can next to the bed. "We're supposed to tap the remaining essence" He began tapping Yoongi's face softly, his fingers barely touching his skin. He had a concentrated face with furrowed eyebrows and a pout on his lips.

Maybe don't look at his lips while he's right in front of you? Right. Maybe he should listen to his brain.

He closed his eyes and let out a hum.

"This is actually nice, we should do this more often" He smiled at Hoseok.

"You're such a baby" He giggled. "A very cute one" Oh, how much his heart loved to hear that and started going crazy making him glow. But in red. His face felt very warm and he's sure Hoseok could feel it. "Ah, you're red. You must like being called baby then"

"Shut up," He pushed a giggling Hoseok off his face. "I changed my mind. You're not welcome anymore"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Don't kick me out" He tried to keep a serious facade but totally failed. It was cute. "I swear I'll stop. I was just kidding!"

"Yeah, right" He furrowed his eyebrows and crossed his arms trying to look angry but seeing Hoseok's smile was what disassembled him completely. Going against his smile was a futile attempt.

"I swear on my mother! no, i swear on my dog, I'll stop" Hoseok placed one of his hands on top of his heart and the other palm open, like he was some kind of president giving his oath during the inauguration ceremony. He sure was the president of Yoongi's heart.

Lame.

He couldn't keep the giggle that escaped him at his sillyness. Hoseok opened one eye at the sound and then gave him his most bright smile yet. "Now do me! Take off my mask. Pleaseeee'' He gave him puppy eyes that he knew worked every single time. Today was no exception.

"Fine" He closed the distance between them, which wasn't that much, that their knees were now touching. Hoseok closed his eyes with a satisfied smile on his face. He carefully removed the mask, folded it and then threw it. He tried to be as gentle as Hoseok was, softly spreading the remaining of the mask all over his face. He too let out a hum like he did earlier.

It was easier like this, to admire him without him catching it or anyone for that matter. He could never get tired of looking at Hoseok. It was as if his sculptor took his sweet time carving, creating him. He knows that the slope of his nose alone must've taken days to make. The hours upon hours that it took him to try to paint his sweet doe eyes, that he knows even with all the colors in the world he couldn't be able to replicate it. And oh, he could go on and on about his lips, all day for the rest of his life. It's actually really unfair. The way the curve of his cupid's bow dips down, almost touching his lower lips, giving him the perfect shape of a heart. A love shaped mouth. And the cherry on top? the most lovely beauty mark, placed perfectly on top of his upper lip. Pure devil temptation.

Without realizing he kept his eyes on that exact beauty mark, the tip of his finger on his lower lips like he was hypnotized by it. It made Hoseok first open his mouth up, just a bit and then his eyes, looking up at Yoongi. He could feel like it was intense, like it wanted to trap him right there so he didn't dare to move.

His throat went dry. He gulped and then tried to clear his throat and resumed his tapping.

The air between them suddenly became tense and he didn't dare to break the silence while he busied himself with the task at hand. That was easier said than done though. He tried not to spend too much time on any piece of his skin and especially very far away from his lips.

"I think it's done" He murmured softly, since they were so close together, after some time has passed. He lastly spread it around his neck and then removed his hands entirely placing them on his own lap.

"Thank you" Hoseok whispered with a smile decorating his face.

A yawn is what broke the tension, making them both chuckle.

"Let's lay down" He suggested and then immediately laid down. Hoseok followed shortly after, getting comfortable in his space. "I think I'm too tired to go turn off the lights"

"Don't worry, baby. I'll do it" He knows Hoseok is saying it to make fun of him and his big smile confirms it but his heart still skips a beat at the word. He is grateful the lights are out once Hoseok comes back to the bed so he can't see the red on his cheeks. He lays down giving Yoongi his back.

They stay like that for a couple of minutes, without saying anything, only the sound of their breathing can be heard. While it is dark, the dim light of the moon shines through the window and it helps him to see the up and down of Hoseok's back. Oddly enough it helps him to get to the arms of sleepiness faster, like it's slowly guiding him. He's almost there when Hoseok speaks again.

"Hyung,'' He hums in acknowledgement. He's too tired for words. "Would you mind… petting me? '' He whispers the last words but his sleepy mind can still catch it. He doesn't say anything for a few seconds but then gets closer and starts caressing his arm. The satisfied hum Hoseok lets out is his reward.

He then lets sleep embrace him peacefully, willingly letting go. Last thing he remembers is getting closer to Hoseok. Then everything is a blur.

Next time he opens up his eyes, he doesn't know where he is. The disoriented feeling that one gets when they open their eyes first thing in the morning, is persistent. He tries to move to another position but realizes he's wrapped up in arms over his torso. The arms tense up when he tries to move and the next thing he knows is that a leg is slinging over him. If he didn't feel caged before, he sure does now.

"Don't go yet, it's too early" Hoseok's raspy voice murmured in his ear. His lips even touched the skin of his neck, right behind ear, waking every hair on that part of his body. Scratch that, every hair stood up when he heard his morning voice. He went stiff in his arms and it felt awkward.

After some time, the arm and leg that were caging him seemed to relax but not enough to go without Hoseok noticing his attempt to escape. He tried to relax but the crazy beating of his heart was making it hard to do so.

Breathe in, breathe out. Inhale, exhale. His mind repeated it over and over like a mantra.

Next to him, he felt Hoseok doing it so easily, exactly what he was trying (and failing!) so hard to do.

So unfair, how does he make it so easy?

Maybe he should enjoy this he tells himself, like when was the last time someone held him? and no one was watching him (not Hoseok at least), and even if he does wake up right now, he is not going to see his face first thing (he hopes).

So he's safe.

Mostly. The insane speed in which his heart is beating will disagree.

Concentrating on his breathing, he tries to go back to sleep. And after what feels like hours, he succeeds.

The next time he regains consciousness is when a constant buzz can be heard on the bedside table on his left.

He feels a groan on his neck, and then the arm that was on his stomach disappears and comes back but a light almost blinds him so he turns his head to his right.

A few minutes later, he hears a sigh from Hoseok.

"Hyung," He mumbles. Yoongi answers with a hum. "Hyung" He repeats against his shoulder. More than hear him, he feels the vibration of the words being said on his shoulder traveling 'till it reaches his ear.

"Yeah?" He replies with his raspy morning voice. He's still between falling asleep or staying awake limbo, trying hard to concentrate on Hoseok's voice.

"Jin-hyung made us breakfast, if you want some" He hums again acknowledging what Hoseok said but too sleepy to understand the proposal. A pair of lips press against his shoulder. "He made Janchi guksu. I can save you some if you don't want to get up yet"

Now that sounds great. He thinks about it. Freshly made food sounds nice. He opens his eyes and starts stretching his limbs. "I'm up, I'm up" He replies even though he stays in bed for a few more minutes. Hoseok chuckles next to him while pressing his face on his neck and letting out a satisfied hum.

"C'mon big baby, let's go then" He sighs while Hoseok chuckles again.

Just moments after Hoseok leaves the bed, he already misses the warmth of his body next to him.

And with that thought in mind he gets up.

He finds Hoseok brushing his teeth and when he sees him, his whole face lights up. He tries to say something but the toothbrush on his mouth makes it hard to understand. His face must show pure confusion because he spits out, finishes cleaning his teeth and goes to him until he's right in front of him. He starts brushing his hair back with his fingers and he lets him. He finishes and gives the most toothpaste commercial smile he has.

"Now go brush your teeth" He lets out a squeak after feeling Hoseok's hand collapsing with his ass, followed by his lovely laugh.

Once he gets food in his stomach and is overall more awake, he remembers how they cuddled and Hoseok kissed him. Again. Kissed him on his neck this time. How Yoongi was wrapped up in his arms like he was his personal pillow. How he didn't want him to go and caged him with his limbs.

Cool cool cool. Great.

He doesn't know what to do with himself the rest of the day. He keeps getting flashbacks of being surrounded by the warm arms (and a leg!!!) of Hoseok. Of him calling him baby. Of his tight embrace, of him asking him to stay a little longer, of them together in bed like they're more.

God, he wishes.

He doesn't remember them being this… touchy with each other. But the memories of them not touching one way or another are sparse. Like if he's honest with himself, Hoseok has always touched him. The arm on his shoulders when they're in a group gathering. Their hands brushing over and over when they're walking side by side, shoulder by shoulder. Hoseok holding his hand when something scares him and doesn't really let go 'till hours and hours later. The rare hugs he gets from Hoseok sometimes when he needs someone to hold him, when they're alone and he opens up about his fears.

Okay, maybe they've always been touchy.

He can't really argue against that.

Hoseok started being more daring after their little cuddling session. If they were in the same room together, he was always all over him. Arm on his shoulder, hand on his waist, greeting hugs that lasted a little bit more than usual, more hand-holding with intertwined fingers. Or just playing with Yoongi's fingers. Hoseok was always touching him and he couldn't stop him even if he wanted to (He didn't).

Deep down he was expecting them now, he craved the contact.

And the worst part was that he wanted more.

For Seokjin's birthday they go to a club, which is weird considering their hyung is a stay-in at heart. At the same time, you never know what to expect with him. They can never say no to him either.

So they go to a club.

He decided to look presentable. He threw a white tee tucked in black ripped jeans, some hoop earrings and two necklaces. Maybe he does his hair and light makeup too. Not that he wanted to impress anyone.

Liar.

When he gets there, Seokjin is already on his second beer judging by the two bottles on the little table in front of him.

"Yoongi-yah, my dear friend" He stands up with his arms up in the air.

"Hyung, happy birthday, have fun or whatever" He says giving him a hug.

"Always so expressive," He replies, patting him on his back. "Almost thought you wouldn't make it" He frowned at that and then pulled apart.

"Of course i will not miss you getting older" He gave him his biggest gummy smile.

"Yah! you're just a few months younger" He then hears Namjoon's chuckles.

"Oh, hey Namjoon-ah" He gives him a side hug too.

"Hi hyung" When he goes back to his seat, Yoongi realizes the two of them are the only ones of their friends group there.

"Where is everyone?" He then asks. Seokjin gives him a glass with something in it, he drinks it and regrets it immediately. "What is this?" He hears Seokjin's distinctive laugh.

"Hyung's special drink, he made me drink it too" Namjoon looks at him apologetically. He sipped from his own drink. "The others are still on their way, i think they're all together" He answered his other question. Yoongi nodded at him.

"I will go to the bar then, " The other two nodded and he went to the bar. The club wasn't really packed yet. Maybe because it was still early. It wasn't too hard to get to the bar and it wasn't full of people yet which was good. He orders a beer and pays for it and then he goes back to where his friends were seated.

Before he gets there he sees four new heads around Seokjin, and judging by the two blondes, brown and black hair colors, he immediately knows it's the youngers of their group and Hoseok.

Taehyung spots him first and wraps his arms around him.

"Ya! We saw each other last week!" He feels his laugh and then he feels Taehyung getting closer to his ear.

"You're not ready for this," gets whispered in his ear like some sort of warning but before he can question him, Yoongi feels two more pairs of arms around him while he lets out more whines (accompanied, of course, by the giggles of three brats).

It's when they let go of him, and he can finally understand Taehyung's warning.

Hoseok looks absolutely stunning. Breathtaking. The most beautiful man in this whole bar probably. No, he's sure Hoseok is the prettiest. The prettiest in this whole world.

He is wearing some big boots with baggy jeans, and when his eyes go up and instead of seeing some kind of tee, one of those big Hoseok likes wearing, he sees a bare tummy.

Yes, he is wearing a crop top. A crop top. God have mercy.

And yeah, he is probably staring. But you're not allowed to blame him. Not for this. Jesus Christ. This is not one of those realistic dreams, right? He feels like it might be.

"We should get him a bucket or something" He can hear Jimin say. Or is it Taehyung? He doesn't know. He's sure his brain just short circuited.

He doesn't who elbows him but it somehow helps him to close his mouth, at the very least. Hoseok, beautiful beautiful beautiful Hoseok, turns and gives him a shy smile.

"Hi, hyung!" He comes closer and wraps his arms around his neck, hugging him, like he always does. He feels breathless, even though Hoseok is not even hugging him that hard. He places his free hand a little bit higher than his waist, his hand traveling higher, closer to his shoulder blades. He's afraid that if he touches Hoseok's bare skin he is going to lose it.

"Seok-ah, hello, hi, yeah hi" Hoseok starts giggling in his ear. And what a divine sound that is this close. They part a little but not far, Hoseok keeps his hands on his neck.

"You're good?" His eyes big, his smile softer. Yoongi nods.

"I'm good, you?" He loves his shy smile, he really does but the sight of him going from a soft smile to a bigger where his eyes transform to little crescents and his mouth makes a heart is something you never want to miss. He can't help but smile too.

"Great now" He says without looking away from him. Like he's the only one in this place. Like he can't stop looking at him, too. He almost can't breathe.

Someone clears his throat and the music and people around them come back.Like he was in some kind of trance, a different place, a different dimension just with Hoseok. He looks away at the same time he hears Seokjin says Shots shots shots! saving him, maybe. Hoseok pulls away to grab a drink, but like always he comes back and stays close, never far away. Always touching.

They stay like that for a while. Sometimes just close enough he feels his warm radiating where their arms touch. Sometimes he has his delicate fingers on his thigh. Sometimes he has a whole lot of Hoseok on his lap, when he laughs at something one of their friends had said.

His heart can barely take it anymore. He is going into cardiac arrest from all the touching that is happening. He urgently needs to see a doctor after tonight. If he survives that is.

Some time later, a song that catches the three younger ones brings him a blessing, a divine intervention of sorts, they drag Hoseok by the arm, telling him they have to dance to this. And then, since it's Seokjin's birthday after all, they grab him too to go to the dance floor. He can breathe again.

The relief is short-lived, though, once his eyes follow where they are. He lied before, the three younger ones weren't a blessing. They were evil and wanted to make him suffer.

Good sweetest god. He might actually start praying.

The song that was playing was slow, with a sensual groove and guitar riffs. It was actually good, Yoongi could give them that. What actually made him weak in the kness and start trembling was the star of the show. The shiniest star in Yoongi's universe. If he thought that he couldn't breathe before, now someone needs to find a respirator. Quickly.

He has seen Hoseok dance before, of course he has. He's been to lots of his festivals. He has seen him on various stages, with different choreographies, alone or with other dancers, in different kinds of attire. Now, somehow, it feels different, it feels new. Especially when Hoseok seems to be waiting for him to watch him dance. Like he craves that attention, his eyes on him, only him. Like he could ever look at anyone else when he is in the same room as him. He gives him that, without caring too much that he is staring, admiring his star. He feels a little dizzy trying to catch everything that is Hoseok. His head moving to the rhythm, his eyes closing, his lips up in a smirk, like he knows he is being watched and likes it. His hands touch his body, every corner he can reach with them. The lights of the bar giving him some kind of a halo.

Gooddamn God. Honey evil temptation.

He feels entranced, trapped in the alluring movement of Hoseok's hips, drunk in his eyes.

He doesn't know how or what happens next. How he was just one second ago watching him dance, and next he was in front of him. His legs making his way, without him telling them to, like they had a mind of their own and only wanting, needing to be close to Hoseok. He puts his hands on Hoseok's hips, not putting much pressure. Yet.

He opens his eyes, his smirk turning into a smile when he sees Yoongi, when he feels him close. He puts his arms around his neck, moving closer to him.

"Is this okay?" Hoseok asks, close to his ear. So close, that all Yoongi feels is him.

"Yeah" He says with a dry throat. He tries to wet his lips but his tongue is also dry. He watches Hoseok follow the movement with his eyes, with a look he's never seen on him before. Sultry, dark and want. He didn't know what to make out of it, so he looked away and maybe that was a bad idea, because his tipsy brain decided that looking at his lips was a better idea.

Oh, what a terrible, terrible mistake.

Would it be so terrible if I kissed him right now?

He didn't think so. Maybe sober Yoongi would hate him so bad tomorrow, now though? He didn't care about his sober self that much.

He closed the distance, slowly, like if Hoseok was uncomfortable he could pull away. He didn't. Nor he didn't care that much about the slowness, like they had the time of the world, like it didn't matter where they were. The first touch was soft, their lips barely touched, just caressing each other with their lips, somehow waiting for the other to pull out.

"Is this okay?" He asks this time, whispering, which is stupid considering they are in a bar with loud music, full of people. But somehow Hoseok understands him (He always does) and nods.

The second was softer still but more firm, full lips on lips. Just staying there for a moment. He tries moving a little and Hoseok follows instantly, he opens his mouth a little, catches his bottom lip with his lips and nips at bit. Hoseok gasps, and he lets that be an invitation to explore deeper, to go one step further down where he knows he can't come back from.

Hoseok tastes like his drink from earlier and something sweet he's never tried before. Something additive and pure.

They pull apart just a bit to breathe, just for seconds, and Yoongi closes the gap again, this time deeper, with a determination he didn't have before, to taste him over and over. His hands move a little up, touching the bare skin, it makes Hoseok gasp again. He does it again. Yoongi explores his mouth with his tongue, trying every corner. Going deeper and deeper into the addiction that is kissing Hoseok.

He knows he's not the only one feeling this high, when he feels his hair being tugged, making him hiss. Hoseok bites his lips softly, and then a little hard, making him moan from the delicious pain that spreads all over him.

That wakes him up, makes him open up his eyes and look at the person in front of him. This isn't just anyone, this is his star, his best friend, the love of his life. He can't do this without telling him what he feels. He can't treat him like he is just a drunk kiss. He needs to tell him.

He pulls up, Hoseok tries to follow him but he grabs Hoseok's hand, interlocking their fingers and drags him outside, somewhere without too much noise and lights and people.

"I- I'm sorry I just can't keep doing this anymore, I-" He starts but gets interrupted by Hoseok.

"No, no, no. I'm sorry, I know I overstepped. I'm so sorry I've made you uncomfortable I should-" Hoseok tries to explain, looking down.

God, he thinks I'm uncomfortable. Again.

"No. Please. Just let me think a bit, I'm still dizzy. Okay, you did nothing wrong, I'm not uncomfortable. It's quite the opposite actually. God, this is embarrassing" That shuts Hoseok up and he looks at Yoongi again with wide eyes. He groans and grabs his hair, thinking how to make this easier. "Well, okay, I like you, like a lot, more than that even. Probably. And maybe, I'm making a fool of myself and you don't even like me like that, I think. But I need you to know this. You're incredibly infuriating, you know that? So sweet and just perfect? Like who even remembers things I barely mentioned once? And talks with me about stuff no one cares about? And gives me sentimental shit? Oh my god, don't even-" He gets interrupted by lips crashing on his own, hands on his cheeks caressing it softly, it makes him soft instantly, and makes him forget about his ramble. Hoseok kisses him once, twice and then pulls up a little where he can see his eyes.

"You're the cutest, you know? But, please, shut up" He does shut up and nods. Hoseok's eyes soften and he gives him a soft smile, the one only for him. "And no, I don't like you like that" He inhales a bit and then lets out, like he's preparing himself. Yoongi holds his breath. "I love you" Even though Hoseok was kissing and hugging him, hearing those words coming from his mouth was still shocking. He flushes. "I love you, god, I can't believe I didn't do this before and I'm Sorry but I love you so much. I should have told you a long time ago but I was terrified of losing you"

"We really are stupid, oh my god" He chuckles and gives him a peck, because he can. Hoseok smiles and kisses him deeper. Exploring each other a little more, now that they know how they actually feel. "We should probably talk about this a little bit more. Like, I really want to date you and do silly romantic stuff and make up a little" Hoseok giggles and it's a delightful sound. He kisses him again and again and again. Like they can't stop now that it's allowed. Hoseok hums against his lips and pulls up slowly like getting away from his lips is a difficult task.

"Mine's closer, we can watch a movie and cuddle and make out during the whole thing. If that is fine by you, of course" He smiles, big and shiny. Yoongi can only admire him.

"You definitely convinced me at makeout" That definitely makes Hoseok laugh. He lets go of his face and grabs his hand interlocking his fingers, dragging him.

He can 100% get used to this.