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Mother always said that memories are fragile like snow; they can melt and disappear just like that. But Ice would try to make his memories like ice, capable of preserving something forever by freezing it. He didn’t want to lose his precious memories.
Ice tiptoed toward the kitchen. Occasionally, he glanced behind him to make sure no one was around. Once he reached his destination, Ice quickly opened the fridge to grab the cake his mother had made earlier that day. Unfortunately, Ice became confused. There was nothing around that he could use to cut it, and there was no way he could take it with his hands—Mother would know.
Amid his dilemma, Ice heard footsteps approaching. He was terrified. Was it Mother? She would definitely scold him.
The kitchen light, which he had intentionally left off, suddenly flicked on, forcing Ice to squint his eyes to adjust to the sudden brightness. At the doorway stood an older boy, his blue eyes filled with curiosity. A small smile soon appeared on his lips.
“What are you doing up at this hour, Ice?” the boy asked. He approached Ice, who was still frozen in place in front of the open fridge. His eyes darted to the cake inside before he chuckled softly.
Taufan, the boy, took the cake out of the fridge and placed it on the table, standing on tiptoes a little. He then searched for the cake knife their mother usually used. Taufan did all of this in a silence that surprised Ice. After all, his second brother was known to be quite noisy.
He handed Ice a slice of cake before putting the rest back into the fridge. Taufan pressed his index finger to his lips and chuckled quietly. “Keep it a secret, okay?”
Ice simply nodded.
He let Taufan escort him back to his room and Blaze’s. Once Ice was safely back in his room, Taufan left. Staring at the cake in his hands, Ice finally smiled a little. Taufan was kind.
...
Ice hated the feeling of being sick. His body was hot, but he felt cold. His head was dizzy, and his stomach was nauseous. He couldn’t eat his favorite cake or drink the ice choco he loved. His throat hurt, and his eyes felt too heavy to keep open for long. While Ice preferred spending time lying in bed, he liked doing so when he was healthy, not when he was sick like this. Even sleeping couldn’t bring him peace.
His twin brother, Blaze, had to sleep in a separate room to avoid catching the illness. Blaze had protested about being apart, saying he was afraid Ice would feel lonely—which wasn’t wrong. But Father and Mother forbade them from sleeping together. Ice didn’t like it and cried because of it. But that only made things worse; he struggled to breathe, his eyes became swollen, and his head throbbed even more after crying. Mother scolded him and Blaze for being stubborn, but why? Ice just didn’t like being left alone.
When night came, Ice grew more restless. He was afraid of being alone. The dark, silent room without Blaze’s presence felt terrifying to him.
Hiding his face under the blanket only made it harder for Ice to breathe, but if he didn’t do it, he felt like something terrifying was watching him.
When the door to his room creaked open, Ice feared one of the monsters from his dreams had become real and was now coming for him.
But it turned out to be just Taufan. He came in carrying a glass of water and a pillow. Taufan tiptoed into the room and gently closed the door behind him. Ice just watched as Taufan stood by his bedside.
“Ice, are you awake?” Taufan asked.
Ice only responded with an unclear mumble because his throat hurt too much to speak. Not long after, he felt a cold palm on his forehead, and without realizing it, Ice leaned into the source of the cold. It felt so comforting. It seemed like Taufan mumbled something about how hot he was, but Ice didn’t really pay attention. When the cold hand that was his source of comfort pulled away, Ice started searching for it again.
Ice was truly caught between being awake and asleep because the next thing he felt was his body pressed against something cold. When he glanced to his side, there was Taufan hugging him. Ice was honestly confused about how Taufan’s skin could feel so cold, but he decided not to care. Ice moved closer to the source of his comfort, falling asleep peacefully in Taufan’s embrace.
Of course, a few days later, when Ice had recovered, Taufan ended up falling ill from catching Ice’s fever.
...
“Brother, it hurts,” Ice cried. Blood was pouring heavily from the wound on his knee. Blaze, beside him, was crying even harder than Ice, even though Ice was the one injured.
“I know, Ice. Just hold on a little longer,” Taufan said.
Ice’s wound throbbed painfully, but it hurt even more to hear his usually cheerful brother’s voice trembling with fear. The look in Taufan’s eyes was a mix of guilt and panic. This was all Ice’s fault for not listening to Taufan. If only he hadn’t been jealous of Blaze, who could already ride his bike, they wouldn’t have had to go through this. It was because Ice wanted to race Blaze without considering that he wasn’t yet skilled at riding a two-wheeled bike like his twin. Taufan had warned him to be careful, but he didn’t listen. As a result, he veered off the path, onto a rocky road, and fell. His knee hit a sharp rock, tearing his skin and flesh, leaving a large wound that bled profusely.
Of course, there were other scrapes, but Ice didn’t care about those.
Taufan calmed Blaze down and convinced Ice’s twin to lead both his bike and Ice’s back home. Meanwhile, Taufan left his bike by the roadside, saying it didn’t matter because their father would retrieve it later. Taufan carried Ice on his back, walking quickly but still ensuring Blaze was following them.
Ice kept crying because of his throbbing wound, but he calmed down a bit when Taufan began singing a song from his favorite cartoon movie.
Their mother panicked when she saw Ice and Taufan covered in blood, but Taufan explained what had happened, which eased her worry slightly, though she still seemed very concerned. She immediately took Ice to the hospital, where his wound required several stitches. The scar is still there to this day, and Ice isn’t ashamed to show it. To him, it’s a special scar.
...
Ice felt that Taufan had started to distance himself from them recently. His second brother still often played with Blaze and Duri, occasionally pranking Halilintar or Solar. But somehow, Ice felt that Taufan did these things out of obligation rather than genuine desire.
Ice didn’t know the right word for it. He was only in his first year of middle school and too lazy to think about complicated vocabulary.
Taufan also rarely baked cakes for them, claiming he was tired because high school took up so much of his time. Moreover, he was about to enter his final year and had to prepare for graduation exams and college entrance tests. But Ice still felt that Taufan was slowly pulling away from them.
Or maybe it was just Ice’s imagination? After all, the other five brothers seemed fine. Even Halilintar and Gempa, who were closest to Taufan, didn’t notice any changes. So Ice decided not to think too much about it.
Still, he regretted not paying more attention to the small changes in Taufan’s behavior.
By the time Ice was in his second year of middle school, Taufan started acting strangely, in Ice’s opinion. He said he wanted to create a flower garden, stopped pursuing his hobby of baking, spent less time playing pranks with Blaze and Duri, and began reading books about plants.
At first, everyone thought Taufan just wanted to try a new hobby. No one took his changes seriously. They all assumed Taufan would eventually go back to being his old self. But they were wrong. Taufan never returned to the way he used to be.
He became dedicated to his garden, watering the flowers, weeding, replacing wilted or damaged plants, and so on. The result was a beautiful garden that looked like it came straight out of a storybook. Ice began to think that this was the new Taufan and that he had to accept it, even though he missed the old Taufan.
Ice didn’t realize something was wrong with Taufan until he heard his brother crying in his room.
The house was quiet at the time. Their father was still at work, Halilintar and Gempa were at their university, Blaze was out playing soccer with his friends, and Duri and Solar had extra classes and wouldn’t be home until the evening. Only their mother and Taufan were home with Ice. At the time, Ice thought everything was fine until he heard the sound of banging on a door and something falling over.
Ice thought someone was trying to break into their house. He hurriedly grabbed Blaze's baseball bat and stepped out of his room. However, to his surprise, the banging sound came from the third eldest brother's room. Ice was confused why their mother hadn't come to check, as she was always concerned about their well-being.
First, Ice chose to peek and see if their mother was out. But instead, he found her sitting in the living room, lost in thought.
Ice's internal alarm went off, signaling that something was wrong.
He approached the third eldest brother's room, where the sound of banging on the door still echoed. Amidst the loud banging, Ice could hear Taufan's sobs.
"Mom... I'm not crazy. I'm not crazy. I'm not crazy. I'm not crazy. I'm not crazy... I'm... not crazy.."
That was what Ice kept hearing. Ice could only stand still in front of the door. The sound of banging shifted to scratching, and Taufan's cries continued, insisting that he was fine, even though it was clear that he was not fine at all.
...
Ice often saw Taufan asleep on a park bench or daydreaming while staring at the sky. When asked what he was thinking about, Taufan would reply that the sky was so beautiful, so vast, and limitless. That he loved the sky so much and wanted to fly to reach it. Taufan said the same thing about the ocean. That the ocean was so vast and seemed boundless, so majestic and grand that he wanted to embrace it.
Ice didn’t know how to respond when Taufan said those things; he could only sit silently beside him. Their parents said Taufan was unwell whenever Ice asked about his words. But Blaze said Taufan was scared. That’s why, when it was just the two of them, Ice would hold Taufan’s hand—just like Taufan used to do for him when he was sick or scared.
He wished there was more he could do to help Taufan. But he was just a middle schooler in his third year, someone who didn’t even have friends. How could he offer help to Taufan?
...
"Why is my flower a forget-me-not?" Ice asked his brother.
Taufan smiled faintly, ruffling Ice’s hair before pointing to the small, pale blue flowers. "The color matches you."
Ice shook his head. Marigolds, which Taufan said matched Blaze’s color, were often called 'Sun Elixir' believed to bring courage. Ice vividly remembered that when they were kids, Taufan would always say Blaze was his source of courage. The flowers that represented them weren’t just similar in color but also held deep meaning for Taufan.
"Is there another reason?"
Taufan was stunned, seemingly surprised by Ice’s question. But then a smile formed on his lips. "I shouldn’t be surprised anymore. Yes, because Ice will always remember."
Taufan’s words were strange and confusing, yet somehow Ice understood what he meant. Unfortunately, Ice’s mouth seemed tightly sealed, even though there were countless words he wanted to say to his brother.
After Ice asked about the flower that represented him, Taufan slowly started to return to the Taufan Ice missed. He baked cakes for them again, played pranks with Blaze and Duri on their other brothers, and laughed and talked endlessly.
He truly came back.
Ice should’ve been happy, but he couldn’t deny the constant fear lingering in his heart. A fear he couldn’t explain because he didn’t understand why he felt scared.
When Ice was in his first year of high school, Taufan invited him to pick some flowers. He wanted to make crafts because he was bored, he said. Ice easily agreed, even though the fear in his heart only grew day by day.
Taufan picked a red rose, an orange gladiolus, a marigold, several forget-me-nots, two small chrysanthemums, and a white climbing rose. He dried them first with the help of their mother, who loved making crafts with dried flowers.
Taufan said he wanted to preserve the flowers so they would never wither or disappear. He wanted to keep them frozen in ice to make them eternal.
Ice helped Taufan a lot in realizing his wish. He even often accompanied Taufan to buy whatever he needed.
What Taufan meant by freezing the flowers was using resin to make it look as if the flowers were frozen in ice. Ice’s forget-me-not flowers were placed in a ball-shaped mold. Taufan joked about it being a wizard’s crystal ball used for fortune-telling, but he said it was a memory ball to be used for remembering.
Taufan called all his creations Ice Flower Memories.
"Now, everything is stored in here," Taufan said, proudly showing off his work to Ice and their mother. Taufan looked so proud of his creations. He said he would give them one by one to his brothers after preparing other gifts. This time, Taufan didn’t want help from Ice or their mother, saying he could do it all on his own.
Ice thought the other gift was the cake Taufan baked in the afternoon. But that wasn’t the gift Taufan meant. And the crafts they made did not share as Taufan had promised.
Ice asked why Taufan didn’t share them despite working so hard to make them.
“The memory isn’t complete yet,” Taufan said with a grin. Ice thought he was just joking. Perhaps the truth was that Taufan had changed his mind and didn’t want to share them anymore.
...
A year later, Ice started to forget that he had once created something with Taufan, which his brother had claimed to be a gift.
Ice had been busy with his life as a second-year high school student. He made friends who accepted his quiet nature, and he learned to open up and socialize as Gempa and Taufan had encouraged him to do. His social circle wasn’t as wide as his twin Blaze’s and probably never would be. But Ice felt he was finally starting to enjoy his teenage years. Slowly, he let go of the things that had consumed his attention.
However, one day, after returning home from school, Ice found a piece of paper on his bed that read:
"Everything is stored in the Ice Flower Memories."
Ice was confused. What did it mean?
Blaze—who was also in the room with him—called out that he had found a similar piece of paper on his bed. However, the words on Blaze’s paper were different. His read, "Let’s reach for courage with the sun’s radiance."
Ice’s unease grew. He hurried out of his room, finding Duri and Solar arguing in the living room. When asked what was wrong, both said they had received a piece of paper with Taufan’s handwriting—just like Ice and Blaze—but they didn’t understand the meaning of the words.
Duri’s paper read, "A touch of magic with a little help from the fairies."
Solar’s paper read, "The wind will carry its meaning."
Ice became increasingly confused. Each message was different, and none of them understood what they meant.
“Wait, try flipping the paper over. There’s writing on the back,” Solar suggested.
Ice flipped his paper over. Solar was right; there was more writing, but it was just a single letter written very small, as if it was meant to be hidden.
“What letter did you get?” Solar asked.
“I got ‘F,’” Blaze said.
“Mine is ‘T,’” said Duri.
“I got ‘N,’” Ice said, showing his paper.
Solar did the same and said, “Mine is ‘A.’”
“I think we’re still missing something. We need to find out what Halilintar and Gempa got to figure this out.”
Ice and his brothers agreed with Solar. The letters didn’t form a recognizable word.
Fortunately, as they were discussing, Halilintar and Gempa finally returned home. Solar quickly explained what had happened, and the two older brothers hurried to their rooms to check. Just like Ice and the others, Halilintar and Gempa found a piece of paper on their beds.
Halilintar’s paper read, "There’s a story hidden within the flowers."
Gempa’s paper read, "Shine brightly with the golden spirit."
On the back of their papers were the letters ‘U’ and ‘A.’ Everyone was busy trying to figure out the meaning of the notes. Taufan wasn’t home, nor were their parents. They tried calling Taufan to ask, but he didn’t answer. Their parents didn’t answer either—perhaps they were all busy.
Ice stared at the paper in his hand again, reading the words repeatedly until he realized. Wasn’t it clear what Taufan meant?
“We need to go to the backyard,” Ice said.
Of course, he was met with questions from his brothers about why they needed to go there. Ice didn’t answer and simply told them to hurry to the backyard. He was already on his way there as he said it. Perhaps driven by curiosity or feeling they had no other choice, his five brothers decided to follow him.
“Halilintar, go to the red roses. Gempa, go to the orange gladioli. Blaze, go to the marigolds. Duri, go to the small chrysanthemums. And Solar, go to the white climbing roses,” Ice instructed as he walked toward the row of blue flowers.
“But why?” Blaze asked.
“Just do it.”
Fortunately, no one asked further questions and quickly did as Ice said. They stood in the spots Ice pointed out, unsure of what to do. Meanwhile, Ice began searching among the blue flowers until he found it.
The Ice Flower Memories, just as Taufan had called it.
He held the round object in his hand. When his other brothers saw it, they were shocked but then started searching the spots where they were standing. Of course, they also found something similar to what Ice had discovered.
"This..." Halilintar seemed hesitant to speak.
Ice himself didn’t know what to say when he found the object he thought Taufan had forgotten. The object Taufan had said would be a gift for him and his brothers. Ice had assumed Taufan had forgotten about it, but in reality, he had just kept it for the time being, not yet deciding when to give it to them.
"But, Ice, how did you know this was in the backyard?"
Ice bit his lower lip. He had helped Taufan make this object, had listened to Taufan's ramblings about it, knew which ones Taufan planned to give to each brother, and remembered it all.
"Don’t you realize that the letters written on the back of the papers, when put together, spell out Taufan's name?"
Ice looked at his brothers one by one. "It starts with Duri, who got 'T,' then either Gempa or Solar, who got 'A,' followed by Halilintar, who got 'U,' Blaze, who got 'F,' and then 'A' again. Lastly, I got 'N.' I... I was the one who helped Taufan make these," Ice said, lifting the clear orb in his hand.
"I sat there when he said he wanted to give these to all of us as gifts. I was there when he joked about making you all go on a treasure hunt because he thought it would be funny to see you solving the clues he left. All the words written on your papers... I know you realize they have a special meaning for each of you."
Ice thought he might cry as he held the clear orb containing a forget-me-not flower close to his chest. Why had he never realized until now why Taufan named these objects Ice Flower Memories? His joke about memory orbs was the truth. These really were memory orbs, and Ice’s contained forget-me-nots because Ice would always remember.
...
Taufan was right that the blue sky seemed infinite. He was right that the sky was indeed beautiful.
And perhaps, because it was so beautiful, Taufan longed to reach it.
...
Snow is something beautiful and fragile, so easily melted and gone.
But what about ice?
Taufan said that ice is something beautiful, dangerous, and powerful. It cannot be controlled and is stronger than thousands of people. It freezes everything and makes it eternal. Taufan said Ice was very much like that.
It’s okay.
Ice was ready to be the ice that would freeze Taufan's memories, making them eternal.