Work Text:
“Can you PLEASE explain what this is supposed to mean— be?” Croatia’s voice bore a deeply annoyed tone as he gestured towards the large egg that sat neatly in the middle of the bed.
“Ah.. well, it’s… I fou… hm.” Serbia stumbled over his words, making him cross his arms like a fussy child after a long while of attempting to push a full sentence out. “I found it! At the store. I bought it, because it was on sale. Yeah. I put it on the bed because I forgot to take it out of my pocket before getting ready for bed.”
“…pocket? Vuk, please. Don’t fuck with me like this. Why the fuck is there a bird nest under it?” His eyes gained an ominous shade to them as his eyebrows furrowed, glaring into the man’s eyes as he nervously turned from him. His half-shout had brought both of their attention to the bundle of sticks and various clutter from outside that surrounded the egg. He didn’t even know where he got the shit that filled the spaces between the tightly knitted sticks, ranging from food packaging to various feathers. There were even a select few pieces of jewellery that held some of the sticks together, the cold surface of the golden accessories seeming to go directly against the purpose of a nest. Though, he didn’t even need to make a nest. Especially on the bed. Which was already warm. The croat sighed, muffled by the two hands that rubbed at his tired eyes.
“Dražen.. how do i.. like… fuck.” He approached Croatia, carefully placing a hand on his back. “The… the egg. It’s.. like… do you—do you know anything about.. like… eggs?”
“Of course I know about eggs..” his voice stayed muffled, attempting to lightly shake the man’s hand off of him.
“Yeah, but.. like.. you know. Human… eggs. Human eggs. Laid by people.”
“Okay, now you’re just fucking with me. You did not shit that thing out. I wont fucking have it. What do you MEAN you LAID AN EGG? Like a fucking chicken..” He hugged himself as he repeated the last sentence under his breath multiple times over.
“It’s.. it’s not that crazy.” The croat whipped his head around, staring at him completely dumbfounded. “Don’t look at me like that, man. If you actually listened during sex ed, you’d know what happens when we fuck unprotected.” His hand travelled further across his back, pulling them closer. “Which is your fault, by the way.”
Croatia let out a silent cry as his grip on his shoulders tightened. “You’re— that’s… a kid—OUR kid— is gonna come out of that thing? It’s, like.. thrice the size of a ping-pong ball. No kid starts off that small.”
“Well, our kid will—“
“We don’t have the funds for a fucking kid. You don’t even pay rent anymore. Even that 10% from before fell through. I’m not paying for a whole CHILD.” Serbia leaned his head on his shoulder, sighing “come on, please. Please. I.. like… love you, and stuff. Please.”
“I don’t— no. I’ll make the world’s largest omelet with this fucking thing before i even think about letting it hatch. It’s not that important.”
“Just… come on. Come on. I’ll… uh… I’ll like.. I don’t know. I just want to care for this thing. I don’t know why. Please just.. let me keep it. At least for one more day.” The croat let out a tired groan as he nuzzled further into his collarbone, planting a small kiss at the base of his neck. He giggled as he felt the man shiver at this, hands sliding down his biceps. His breathing stuttered at continued pecking, culminating in a handful of his hair helping in pulling his head away.
“…Fine.”