Chapter Text
November 28, 2187
Elphelt eyed the bullet in her hand. It was still warm from its hiding spot in her bosom, as close to her heart as she could get it. This, surely, was where the magic that made people fall in love with her came from. Probably.
A smile plastered on her face, she eagerly loaded Ms. Confille with the bullet before getting into a ready position. The building she was perched on had a wonderful vantage point for the bullet’s eventual target, and the railing on the edge of the deck was the perfect spot to keep her hidden while giving her tons of room to make her shot. Elphelt giggled at her good fortune.
Humming to herself, she eyed the ground beneath her in search of a potential target. Excitement overcame her as she eyed a shady but suave-looking man standing in an alley, just barely in sight. Her pulse quickened as he very cooly took out a cigarette and lit it.
“Oohhhhmygosh!!” Elphelt cried, much louder than she realized.
“If he was my husband, I’d probably be getting in trouble with the law! I’d get roped into a big crime family that would put my life in danger! He’d try to push me away, not wanting to get me involved in that life, but that would only reinforce my resolve! Eventually, he’d let his guard down, thanking me for never giving up on him.” She smiled softly to herself. “Oh, it would be so romantic!”
Just as she made sure her shot was perfectly lined up, another man walked in front of her view. She was momentarily annoyed at him getting in the way, only to have her breath stolen when she got a good look at him. Appearing to be some sort of businessman, he was very sharply dressed and well groomed. He was also arguing loudly with someone on the phone. For whatever reason, this left a positive impression on Elphelt.
“If he was my husband, he would probably be away on business trips a lot,'' Elphelt mused. “I’d put up with the lack of attention until, deciding that I’ve finally had enough, scream at him ‘you married me, not your job!’ We’d argue and sleep in separate beds that night, but the next morning he’d apologize to me, and promise to spend less time away. The cycle would continue until, all of a sudden, his company goes under! We’d struggle and struggle to get through it, until one day he would tell me I was the only thing keeping him strong enough to make ends meet!” Elphelt put a hand against her flushed cheek, sighing loudly. “How romantiiic!”
Elphelt pulled herself from her daydream, her focus returning to her mission with deadly seriousness. With her resolve strengthened, she began to line up her shot with her new target when she was suddenly taken aback by yet another potential suitor. This man was not like the others. This man’s face was so kind. Warm. Inviting. There was a soft and calming, yet powerful air about him. A heat began to rise in her chest. She knew, even from this distance, that this was the man for her.
“He’s… perfect!!” This time, Elphelt had to take a moment to recollect herself as she swooned, too lost in her thoughts to notice her nose starting to bleed. “If he was my husband, I’m sure we would have a very quiet and peaceful life together. The type of marriage that others would certainly be jealous of! We’d live in a small and cozy cottage in the woods, and spend as much time in each other’s arms as possible! We’d go on like that for many, happy years, until one fateful night when he finds signs of some kind of alien invader in our home! Oh no! He panickingly worries for my safety, but when he finds me in our bedroom he's shocked to discover that I--!”
“Whatcha doing there, El?”
Elphelt shrieked in horror, whipping her head around to see Sin standing over her with a huge grin plastered on his face. She quickly tried to hide Ms. Confille out of sight before turning towards Sin, trying her best to play cool. She did not succeed at this.
“H-howdy, Sin!” Elpehlt managed to fumble out of her mouth. “I, um… really like the sights from up here!”
“The sights?” Sin shot her a puzzled look, walking over to the edge of the railing to peek over. “It’s just a boring little shopping area. If you want sights, you should really check out the areas by the Orange Tree Garden!”
“Right, silly me,” Elphelt said, nervously twiddling her thumbs. “Uh… how did you even find me up here?”
“Oh, that’s easy!” Sin said with enthusiasm. “We could hear you talking to yourself from a ways away!”
Elphelt’s blood ran cold. “You… could hear me?” Wait, did he say “we?”
“Oh, yeah!” Sin said, oblivious to the nightmare Elphelt was in. “You were pretty loud so it wasn’t all that difficult.” He stopped suddenly, staring at Elphelt’s face. One moment that felt like a lifetime for her. What was he looking at? Why was he looking? Was this part of some Illyrian guard tactic for interrogation?
As the panic began to rise within Elphelt, Sin lazily scratched the back of his face. “I think you got some blood coming out of your nose,” he said nonchalantly. "Might wanna wipe that off."
“I do?” Elphelt hurriedly wiped her nose with the back of her hand. “I guess I do,” she said with a nervous laugh. “Oh well, not a big deal.”
“Come to think of it, you get nosebleeds a lot, don’t you?”
“N-no, I think you’re mistaken,” she replied in a shaky voice.
“No, you definitely do.” Sin said. “The air isn’t even that dry now so I wonder what that’s all about? Maybe it’s worth looking into.”
“We don’t need to worry about this,” Elphelt said, hoping to die on the spot.
“But you don't want blood to stain your nice clothes.” Sin gave her an oh-so-naive grin. “But don't worry, I think I know just the person I can ask for help!”
Elphelt was ready to run away in tears before another voice spoke up.
“El… Why were you aiming your rifle at those people?”
Her blood now ice, Elphelt strained to turn her head, seeing her sister standing a little further from where Sin was moments ago. Ramlethal’s body language and tone of voice would appear neutral to most people--robotic, even--but Elphelt could read her sister well enough to notice the deep concern on her face that put a pit in her stomach. In that moment, she couldn’t bring herself to form words no matter how much she tried. Instead she just kept her head down, unable to look Ramlethal in the eyes.
Sin turned to Ramlethal incredulously. “Wait, are you sure that’s what you saw, Ram? I mean, this is El we’re talking about! She’d never hurt innocent people!”
“You are correct,” Ramlethal said, pausing for a moment before turning back to Elphelt. “But I can only think of one other reason you would aim your rifle at civilians.” There wasn’t a hint of malice or judgment in her words, only concern. Somehow that made it worse.
“I-I’m just looking for… you know… a husband…” Elphelt trailed off in shame. She cautiously looked up to meet Ramlethal's gaze. The pity behind her sister's eyes made her wish she hadn’t.
“El, you can’t force people to love you.”
“Oh no. Nonono,” Elphelt said, hands quickly shaking in a panic. “I’m not forcing them into anything! The Magnum Wedding only lasts for a little while.”
Ramlethal raised an eyebrow. “Then why use it at all?”
The amount of shame bubbling inside of Elphelt was overwhelming. What could she even say? She wasn't able to admit how difficult it was for her to connect with people because they thought she was too intense. She didn’t want to talk about how her anxiety made it difficult for her to not throw every emotion of hers at people. She didn’t want to talk about the void of loneliness within her, or how it compelled her to find someone who could fill it. She especially didn’t want to talk about how these facts constantly put her at war within herself. All she wanted was to put her sister at ease and be done with this conversation.
“It’s… an easy way to break the ice?” Elphelt said sheepishly.
Oh great, now Sin was giving her those sad eyes—er, eye.
“But El," he said, "won’t it just hurt you when it wears off and they don’t feel that way anymore?”
“Oh, it’s fine,” Elphelt said with a sullen smile. “I’m…pretty used to the rejection at this point.”
Sin and Ramlethal glanced at one another with mutual concern. Ramlethal leaned over and took out a handkerchief to wipe the blood from Elphelt's nose. It made Elphelt feel small and weak. Standing back up, Ramlethal held out a hand to her sister.
“C’mon,” she said with a soft smile. “Let’s head home.”
Elphelt took a look at Ramlethal's hand for a moment before shamefully accepting it, pulling herself to her feet. She dusted herself off--neither sister letting go of the other's hand–and looked at Ramlethal with a small smile.
"I'm glad you're back."
Ramlethal returned Elphelt's smile. "I am too."
Elphelt turned to Sin. "I'm happy you're here too."
"Always happy to see you, El," Sin said, shooting her a thumbs up.
The trio took a moment to appreciate the fact that they were all together before beginning to walk home. The Valentines could have flown back to the castle, and with Sin being a Gear he could keep pace easily enough. But they didn't. Instead, there was a mutual understanding that they were taking their time. Together they walked through quaint Roman neighborhoods, with Ramlethal never letting go of Elphelt’s hand, and Sin walking closely next to her on the opposite side.
They didn’t say much, but they were all thinking of how nice it was for the three of them to hang out like this. It didn’t seem to happen often enough.
But Ramlethal couldn’t stop thinking about how concerned she was for Elphelt’s wellbeing. She wanted her to be happy, but what Elphelt was doing was only going to end badly for her. Ramlethal kept her grip tight on Elphelt’s hand.
Worries lurked in the back of Elphelt’s mind as well, and she couldn’t stop thinking about how strong Ramlethal’s grip was. She felt as though she was being guided along like a small child instead of an adult woman. It was then when Elphelt noticed that she wished she was as strong as her older sister.
* * * * *
Between world saving missions and royal duties, family dinners had become rare for the Kiske family. Everyone, aside from Elphelt, was so busy that having the five of them together for one meal was something to be savored. They did, however, seem to make up for lost time by being quite energetic. Aside from the fancy decor of the dining room and the expensive meals, it would be hard to guess that this was the family of the First King of Illyria.
“Sin, please stop eating so fast,” Ky groaned, a weary expression on his face.
Sin looked up at his father with a mouth stuffed full of meat. “But I’m a growing Gear,” he said between mouthfuls, “so I gotta eat!”
“You’re five years old now, Sin,” said Dizzy, politely cutting her food. “You know full well that Gears are done growing before then. You’re no longer a boy.”
“Though you’ve still been growing despite that,” Ky muttered, almost too quiet for anyone else to hear.
“Oh yeah! Training with the old man really paid off, huh?” Sin flexed his biceps for everyone to see. “I mean, look at these things! Pretty impressive, right?”
Ramlethal’s eyes widened in awe and wonder. Dizzy's face glowed in astonished pride. Even Ky looked very impressed.
“Oh my,” said Dizzy with a smile. “You’ve really grown into such a man. I’m so proud!”
Sin smiled bashfully. “Aw shucks, thanks Mom!”
Elphelt hardly paid attention to the antics happening at the dinner table. She felt a million miles away from her own body, quietly taking small bites of her food with eyes unfocused. Usually she would be matching Sin’s energy and talkativeness, but ever since rescuing her from their mother, her mood had been alternating between her usual self and moods like this. She didn’t even react when Sin started flexing his muscles. Mentally she wasn't even there, at least not until a voice dragged her back from the void.
“Is everything alright?” Ramlethal quietly asked Elphelt. Her face was ripe with concern, immediately snapping Elphelt out of whatever trance she was in. She mentally kicked herself for making her sister worry.
Elphelt turned to Ramlethal with a sheepish grin. “Oh, I guess I just got lost in one of my daydreams again.”
It wasn’t a very good lie, but Ramlethal didn't press her further. She simply nodded to Elphelt. “You can tell me if you need anything at all.”
Elphelt's smile warmed into something genuine. It hadn't been long since Ramlethal believed herself to be nothing more than an emotionless tool. Elphelt and Sin were the ones to teach her about emotions in the first place, and now here she was offering emotional support. Elphelt was incredibly proud of her growth. However, Elphelt couldn't bear to burden her sister when she was only just starting to understand emotional depth. “I’ll keep it in mind,” was all she said.
Ramlethal smiled back, and then returned to her plate of food. A quiet sigh escaped from Elphelt. If anyone could understand at least some of what she went through, it would be Ramlethal. And yet, Elphelt wasn’t even sure what she could say to her.
Maybe it was better not to say anything. She needed to stop wasting her limited time with her sister, as well as with her new family. Ky was always so busy running Illyria, and Sin and Ramlethal were always away on missions. Even Dizzy didn’t have as much time for her anymore, as she was beginning to take on the duties of a queen. Soon the whole Kiske family would be out in the open, and preparations needed to be made. That meant a lot of extra work for the king and queen. It was rare that everyone in the Kiske household could be together like this. She shouldn’t waste this opportunity by focusing on the negatives.
And so Elphelt joined in on the conversations at the dinner table with all of the energy and cheerfulness that everyone had come to expect from her. It took a considerable amount of effort to maintain her usual sunny disposition, but she tried not to worry about that. The whole family was having a great time together, so she was going to have a great time too!
After dinner, Elphelt volunteered herself, Sin, and Ramlethal to help clean the dishes. Sin did complain a bit that they shouldn't have to wash dishes since they were royalty. Dizzy and Ky wanted the family to contribute to chores so that being in a royal family didn’t go to their head, but it didn’t stop Sin from going on about how roughing it with “the old man” taught him that dishes were useless anyways. Elphelt couldn’t help but giggle at both Sin’s remarks and Ramlethal’s textbook responses as to why dishes actually were, in fact, necessary.
Elphelt was just happy to be around Sin and Ramlethal. With Sin being the first person to ever consider her a friend, and Ramlethal being her dear sister who she had gone through so much with, they were without a doubt the two people closest to her heart. It was such a shame that they were never around much, but it didn’t matter in that moment. Elphelt was enjoying the company of her two favorite people in the world, and she was thankful for that.
After dishes, the three took a walk to the nearby bakery for some sweets. Ramlethal worried it would be too soon after they had such a big meal for them to have dessert, but Sin and Elphelt were too excited for sugar that her words fell on deaf ears. She figured if they weren’t worried about it, she wasn’t either.
Between the baked goods, playing fetch with Ramlethal’s dog, and what they called “Lucifero Ball,” Elphelt had exactly the kind of fun she was hoping for--stomachaches aside, at least. (How Sin never got them was anyone's guess.) Elphelt was so caught up in the moment that she forgot her time with them was limited, but it had to end at some point. She just didn't think it would be so soon.
The sun began to set over the horizon, and laughter echoed as the trio stepped foot on the castle grounds. Seemingly in tandem with their arrival, Ramlethal received a call.
“Yes?” she said into the sigil against her ear.
The laughter died down into a gut wrenching silence. Only a few moments passed, and yet Elphelt could feel her heart sinking further and further for an agonizing minute. She knew what was coming.
Ramlethal ended the call and turned to Sin. “It’s time for us to go” Elphelt tried not to let the despair show on her face. Sin merely frowned.
“Oh shoot,” he said. “Is it that time already?”
“W-wait!” Elphelt nearly shrieked, unable to stop her anxiety from spiking. “You both just got back. Do you really have to leave so soon?”
“Sorry,” Ramlethal said softly, giving her sister an apologetic look.
“Why don’t you join us, El?” Sin said, his trademark grin not faltering. “We could totally use your help!”
Elphelt looked down at her feet little too quickly. “That’s okay,” she said quietly. “I don’t think I’m ready to get back out there yet…” Sin and Ramlethal nodded in grim understanding.
Ramlethal walked up to her sister and took both of her hands in hers. “If you would like, I could stay here with you.”
Elphelt shook her head. “No, I couldn’t make you do that. I know how much being out there helping people means to you.” Elphelt forced a big smile that never reached her eyes. “I’ll be fine. I just need a little time is all.”
Ramlethal was still filled with unease, but she nodded. She took another step towards Elphelt and carefully wrapped her arms around her. “I’ll try not to be gone too long.”
Elphelt hugged her sister right back, pulling her in with a tight grip. “Don’t worry about me,” she said softly. “Take as much time as you need to.” The Valentines continued to hold each other for several moments, silently fearful about what would happen when they parted ways. Finding it useless to prolong the inevitable, Ramlethal apprehensively pulled away from Elphelt, walking over to Sin’s side.
“Don’t worry El,” Sin said energetically, shooting her a grin. “We’ll be back before you even know it!”
Elphelt crossed her arms and huffed. “You’d better not be making empty promises to a lady, mister! I remember the last time you said that.”
Sin scratched the back of his head in embarrassment, his smile faltering slightly. “Oh yeah, that’s right.” Just as soon as it left, his grin came right back. “Then I’ll be sure to get you a souvenir to make up for it! That’s a promise I can keep easy.”
"Hmm, I guess…” Elphelt trailed off, her arms still crossed. She shot Sin a mischievous smirk. “But only if it’s something really cute!”
Sin responded with a salute. “Yes ma’am, one cute souvenir coming up!”
Elphelt giggled as she waved the two goodbye. Ramlethal took one last look at Elphelt, her worry for her sister’s well-being no less palpable.
Noticing her apprehension, Sin leaned over and whispered to her, “Trust me, it’ll all work out fine.”
Ramlethal looked back at Elphelt, who waved with a smile on her face. Ramlethal responded to her sister with a small smile and wave of her own. She and Sin turned away from Elphelt to face the open sky, Ramlethal holding her arms tight around Sin’s waist. “Ready?” she asked him.
“Always am,” Sin said with enthusiasm. “Let ‘er rip, Ram!”
Suddenly, Ramlethal took off into the sky with startling speed, carrying Sin with her. Sin’s cries of excitement echoed off of the castle’s outer walls, startling a flock of birds on their way up. The commotion died down quick, and Sin's shouts of jubilation were turning fainter and fainter. Soon enough they were nothing more then a tiny spec in the sky, and then nothing at all. Elphelt’s face dropped. Suddenly she felt all of the energy drain from her body. Since when was trying to be happy this much work? She despised the idea of sleeping these days--especially so early--but she knew her body wouldn’t let her say no.
She slowly walked her way down the castle halls, fighting to stay awake long enough to reach her bedroom. Trying to remember which of the many halls in the castle led to her room was incredibly difficult. She nearly stopped and asked a guard for directions, but figured conversation would be too tiring. How did she not notice she was this tired until now? How could she be this exhausted in the first place? These were questions she didn't have the energy to answer, so she decided to ignore them in favor of her single minded goal of finding her bed.
Finally she turned the corner to see her familiar bedroom door, and she was relieved of her fear of blacking out in the hallway in a very unladylike way. She barely had it in herself to open the door, but alas she had made her way to the holy land. Unable to do much else, she fell on top of her bed, hardly having the time to get herself under the covers before sleep overtook her. Hopefully tonight's dream was a peaceful one.
* * * * *
Strings.
Nothing but strings.
All around are strings.
Trying to get her.
To latch on to her.
Control her.
Panic.
Fight them off.
Get them off!
Get.
Them.
OFF!
She fought and she fought, but no amount of struggling was enough.
A scream. She didn’t remember screaming. It was as if she were forced to against her will.
Will.
She hated that word. It reminded her of having none.
As if on cue, a sinister laugh echoed. It froze her in place, more effective than restraints ever could be. The strings avoided her mother as she walked closer and closer.
“Hello there my darling daughter.” Each word that she spoke made Elphelt’s brain scream. With each syllable, her mother’s face twisted into uncanny expressions that proved just how far from human she really was.
Elphelt wanted to run away. She could not.
She wanted to plug her ears. She could not.
She wanted to look away, yet she was powerless to do even that. Her mother smirked in that devilish way that only she could.
“Well you’re not exactly my daughter, are you?” She said, playfully tugging a string with her finger. “You’re more like my puppet.”
That was right, this woman was no mother--not to Elphelt nor Ramlethal. Elphelt’s stomach lurched at the knowledge she could agree with this woman on something.
Another ear splitting laugh. Her mother--no, Ariels--placed a hand on her face. It felt like decay against her cheek. Or like if a person’s touch could feel like agonizing emptiness.
“You only exist to become a monster,” Ariels said. “Like I said; you were always destined to be the loneliest creature in the world.”
Lonely. There was that word again. Probably the most painful one Elphelt knew.
"You think you understand pain?" Ariels said as if reading her thoughts. "You have no idea what pain is."
Elphelt’s body twisted. Contorted. Writhing. Her body warped and grew in ways that were wrong.
She looked down at her hand. It didn't look like her hand.
Her hand was a monster’s.
She was Justice.
Her panic only grew as she couldn’t stop the desire to kill rise within her.
(no.)
Eradicate.
(no!)
Decimate.
(please, NO!)
She was not herself, nor did she belong to herself.
“Yes!” Ariels said gleefully. “You have no will. My will is absolute!”
The faces of Justi--Eplhelt’s loved ones all burned to a crisp with each gamma ray she fired. With each death, another fracture in her heart.
Sin.
Sol.
Ky.
Dizzy.
Ram…
Oh god, not Ram too.
Everyone was dead.
She killed them.
She killed every last one of them. And now she was all alone.
Alone.
Alone.
She started to scream.
“No, my puppet,” Ariels’ disembodied voice pierced into her. “You can only scream when I say so.”
She continued to scream. Nothing came out. She could not scream.
She no longer had the freedom to.
She had nothing and she had no one.
Not even herself.
Alone.
* * * * *
Elphelt shot awake in a cold sweat, a silent scream desperately trying to claw its way out of her throat. Her body shook as she wrapped her arms around herself, barely noticing the tears rolling down her cheeks. A nightmare, she reminded herself. It was just a nightmare. Calm down. Ariels was locked away for good, and Elphelt was safe in her bedroom in Illyria castle. It took some time for her to believe any of it, but slowly she started coming back to reality.
She waited it out until she had calmed down enough to stop crying and shaking. Whether it lasted a few minutes or a few hours, Elphelt had no way of knowing. When she eventually convinced herself that she was ready, Elphelt cautiously shifted to the end of the bed and planted her feet firmly on the ground. Her legs trembled as she pulled herself upright, and they didn't stop trembling after taking a few steps. She didn't like that. She tried forcing herself to move normally. The nightmare was over, so it was better if she got over it as soon as possible.
Walking over to the vanity on the other side of her room, she freshened up her makeup, trying her best not to think of how much it hurt to lose the color in her hair. She used to be so proud of her pink hair. The white made her feel empty. But not if she could push those thoughts away. She didn’t need to think about that.
She was just fine, of course. There was no reason for her to worry anyone. She just needed to chase away the bad thoughts with happy ones! And what was more happy than finding love? So she has to find love, because she has to be happy. She was fine, because that’s what she promised Ramlethal. Because she didn’t want to burden anyone by making them worry about her.
She was fine. Everything was fine.
Elphelt looked at herself in the mirror and smiled as brightly as she could. She tried not to think about the fact that her smile looked forced. Fake, even.
Like a doll’s smile.
Elphelt Valentine was not fine.
* * * * *
Elphelt fought hard to not let the horrors of last night ruin a brand new day, and she knew the best way to do that was to socialize to forget her troubles. She spent the early morning hanging around every person in the castle she came across. The poor chambermaids were finally rescued from Elphelt's never-ending rambles about bush dogs when Dizzy found her. The soon-to-be queen's invitation to spend time with her sent Elphelt over the moon, and she joined Dizzy for the rest of the morning and some of the afternoon in the castle's family room. The dreadful night was barely a thought in Elphelt's mind during this period, and being able to help Dizzy made her feel less lonely. Sometime in the early afternoon, Elphelt was standing behind a seated Dizzy, brushing her hair with an abundance of glee.
“You’re always so helpful, Elphelt,” Dizzy said warmly. “It grows so fast. It can be difficult to maintain.”
“Not a problem!” Elphelt replied, Dizzy’s approval feeding her dopamine high. “You’ve done so much to make me feel welcome here. It’s the least I can do!” Unfortunately for Dizzy, she could feel Elphelt’s enthusiasm a little too well with each brush stroke, but she didn’t have the heart to tell her that.
“It’s nothing at all,” Dizzy said, trying not to wince. “You're family now. And besides, I know what it’s like for society to reject you for who you are. I’d never turn away someone in need of a home.” Elphelt sobered at her words. Much to Dizzy’s relief, this also calmed Elphelt’s brush strokes.
“I can’t imagine anyone ever being able to hate you, Dizzy. You’re the most caring and kind person I've ever met.” She hadn’t known Dizzy for very long, and yet she was very graciously cared for by her from the get go. Elphelt even started to see Dizzy as the positive mother figure that she never had, which was kind of weird considering Elphelt was a genetic copy of Dizzy’s mom. Or maybe that didn’t really matter since every Valentine was pretty unique from Aria? Or was it more accurate to say Dizzy's mom was Justice? Was there a difference?? Maybe it was better not to think about it.
Elphelt was brought back to reality by Dizzy's voice, responding to the comment she already forgot she made.
“Gears are starting to see some kind of acceptance nowadays,” Dizzy mused. “But humanity was afraid of us so soon after the war.” Dizzy started to blush. “It makes Ky all the more incredible for accepting me back then.”
Elphelt squealed in excitement, causing Dizzy’s cheeks to burn brighter. “Sorry,” Elphelt said, bashfully. “I just can’t help but get excited when I hear about you and Mr. Kiske.” She put both hands on her cheeks and sighed deeply. “You two are just so in love! You’re like the perfect power couple!”
Dizzy chuckled lightly at Elphelt’s enthusiasm, trying to hide her embarrassment. “We’re not that special,” Dizzy said, waving her hand as if to shoo the silly little thought away. “I believe that everyone has someone for them. When you find that person, you just need to be willing to put in the work.”
Elphelt’s heart sank. “But I already try so hard,” she said, somberly. Dizzy's eyes met Elphelt's with a look of apology and concern. A pit formed in Elphelt’s stomach at the thought of ruining Dizzy’s positive mood. She quickly brought her smile right back. “S-sorry, I shouldn’t make this about me.” She gleefully clasped her hands together. “Now tell me more about how you two met!”
Dizzy’s expression did not change, and the more Elphelt looked at it, she realized it looked much like the same expression of pity Ramlethal had been giving her the previous day. Elphelt started to feel small from her gaze.
“Elphelt…” Dizzy said, taking her time to carefully choose her words. “It’s not something you can force.” She looked up in concentrated thought. Elphelt leaned in closer, wanting to grasp every single word she said. “I suppose you can think of it like--” she paused in thought for long moment, before suddenly lighting up in realization--“Strings!”
“Eh?” Elphelt’s body became lead as she remembered the dream from last night, but did her best to politely listen without letting Dizzy know of her discomfort.
“Any relationship, not just romantic, can be thought of like a string between yourself and another,” Dizzy said, using her fingers to demonstrate. “The bond needs to be strong on both ends first before you can work on reinforcing the relationship, or the string, as a whole.”
Elphelt tried as hard as she could to listen through the noise in her own head, but she couldn’t make sense of the words coming out of Dizzy’s mouth. They sounded reasonable, and she knew what each word meant, but with every mention of strings Elphelt was further and further away from the conversation, until she suddenly snapped back to reality at the sound of another voice.
“Mrs. First Queen of Illyria, your services are required.”
Ky was standing in the doorway, his face hardly hiding his self-satisfaction at what was probably the most milquetoast attempt at a joke. But his face held something far, far deeper as he stared into the eyes of his wife, who smiled and laughed at his attempt at humor with genuine glee. It was brief, but the smile that the two shared in that one silly little exchange was unlike anything Elphelt had seen before. She wondered if she had ever smiled like that.
“Oh, hello Elphelt,” Ky said, finally sober enough from his lovestruck stupor to notice the other woman. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything important.”
“Nope!” Elphelt replied too quickly and too enthusiastically to be genuine. “I just finished brushing her hair!”
“Well, that was very kind of you,” Ky said with a smile. “After all these years my brushing skills could use work. I’m always afraid I’ll just pull her hair if I try,” Ky said with a laugh, but stopped when Dizzy got out of her chair to put a hand on his shoulder.
“You do just fine,” Dizzy quietly said through gritted teeth. She looked up at Ky with pleading eyes. “Trust me.”
A wave of horror overcame Ky as he wondered just how bad Elphelt could have been at simply brushing hair. He looked over at the Valentine nervously. How did she brush her own hair? Ky already dreaded the sleepless nights he was going to have over this.
“I-I'm afraid we must be going now,” he said to the Elphelt, his voice wavering. “There’s much for the First King and Queen of Illyria to do.” He waved awkwardly as he led his wife out the door. “Hopefully we won’t be too swamped with work to eat dinner as a family tonight.”
Dizzy waved politely at Elphelt. “Thank you again for helping me with my hair.”
As the door closed behind them, Elphelt stood in momentary confusion. They left in a bit of a hurry, didn’t they? That was weird, right? She was pretty sure that was weird. But they did have important work to do. Oh well, they couldn't have hung out with her forever. No use thinking too hard about it.
…
Silence.
She was alone again, possibly for the rest of the day. The dread crawled its way inside her body once more. She held herself tightly in order to calm down. What was wrong with her? She felt silly reacting this way just for being left by herself. Everyone else could manage being alone for several hours just fine, so why couldn’t she? She was broken, certainly. That must be the case. After all, Dizzy probably gave her the holy grail of love advice and she couldn’t even pay attention to her words.
In moments like these she felt compelled to confide in someone about her issues, but just as soon as the thought would enter her head she’d push it away. All that would do is burden other people needlessly. Everyone had their own issues, and she couldn't bear the idea of making things worse for the people she cared so much for. She just had to wait for everything to work itself out.
She looked over at the mirror hanging to her right. The panicked eyes of the trembling girl looking back sent shivers up her spine. She closed her eyes, breathing deeply, and forced the biggest smile she could before opening her eyes again. Fake. It looked fake. Images splashed in her head of the smiles shared between Dizzy and Ky. Why didn’t her smile look like that? Why did hers look so… so…
…Sad.
Her smile dropped and she realized her eyes never stopped looking scared and hollow. She couldn’t hide this anymore, could she? Soon enough the dam would burst when her family was around and she’d have no choice but to burden them. She couldn’t have that. She refused to cause them any kind of suffering. Though the thought made her heart ache, she knew what she had to do. She couldn’t stay here anymore.
Elphelt slowly started walking towards her bedroom. Each step feeling far too slow, and the many hallways feeling as though they continued farther than they ever have. So she started walking faster. It was still too slow. Her steps became faster. And faster. And suddenly Elphelt was running towards her bedroom. She ran as fast as she could, as though something were chasing her. Skidding down hallways and causing the heads of Illyrian guards to turn in confusion, she ran like her life depended on it. She didn’t know why she ran, but adrenaline pumped through her veins and told her to speed up nonetheless.
Bursting through the door of her bedroom, she quickly packed as many of her belongings as she could. She took a page out of her diary and left a hastily written note so everyone would know she left when they inevitably came to look for her. She then opened the window and took a deep breath, waited for her heartrate to slow, and then exhaled. Her mind was made up. She wouldn’t return to the castle until she was able to become someone who didn’t burden other people. She was going to be happy one way or another, and her best bet was surely to find love. Convinced that she was making the right choice, she leapt from her bedroom window and took off flying into the great expanse. She didn’t know where she was going other than away from Illyria castle. She simply let her heart lead the way as her home became smaller and smaller at her back.