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“We have to be downstairs in twenty minutes, would you please get dressed?”
“I said I’m not going.”
“You’re being ridiculous. We’ve talked about this, you-”
“I’m not going.”
Tenya just sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose, staring down at the blonde sprawled out on his bed. Neither one of them was anywhere near close to looking presentable, and he was growing quite stressed.
“It’s our graduation dance, Katsuki. I’m the class representative. I have to be there.”
He spoke sternly before walking to his wardrobe and looking through clothes, trying to find his suit. Tenya had dealt with a fair share of his boyfriend’s stubbornness over the years, and his apprehension wasn’t shocking in the slightest, but something still felt off.
“Okay? Go by yourself.”
Katsuki grunted, thumb flicking across his phone screen as he scrolled Instagram. It was mostly posts from all their friends about the grad dance and that only annoyed him even more. The taller man just stood quietly for a moment, pulling off his shirt to change and clearing his throat before speaking.
“I would appreciate it if you joined me.”
He started slowly, not wanting to betray too much emotion in his voice. In truth, he was sort of desperate. It was a big night and he was supposed to be the face of it. What was he to do if his own boyfriend wouldn’t even accompany him? It was a precursor for disaster, and one tiny deviation from his plan would make Tenya start to spiral.
“Is something wrong? I even made sure to get you a suit... I assumed you would come along, I didn’t believe you were serious.”
“Nothing’s wrong. I just don’t want to.”
They weren’t necessarily the most emotional couple. It was usually only Tenya’s incessant coaxing that got anything out of Katsuki, and even then he wasn’t exactly an open book. No matter how much the blonde protested, Iida knew something was up. Katsuki wasn’t one to flake out on things like this, especially not when his boyfriend was so insistent on needing him there.
“Katsuki.”
Tenya sighed and walked over to settle on the bed beside him. He was quiet.
“Please. Talk to me.”
The taller begged, scooting closer to wrap his arms around the other. Bakugo stiffened at first, but as Iida latched on, strong biceps settled across his body, he couldn’t help but relax. There was so much he wanted to say, but no part of him was brave enough to say it. Everything about the dance, about graduation as a whole, scared him in ways he wasn’t prepared to address.
“It’s stupid.” He started, because in his heart he knew it was. “It’s just-... I don’t wanna ruin your night.”
“It is not stupid. My night is only good if you’re part of it.”
Tenya chided immediately, clearly displeased as he squeezed the other close against his chest. He was worried. This wasn’t like him, and he could feel the young hero growing restless in his hold.
“I just.. don’t want to graduate.”
A brief pause.
“I mean, you don’t seriously think this relationship is making it past high school, do you?”
His words felt like a slap to the face—like Katsuki Bakugo had just ripped out his heart and stomped on it.
“What?”
Iida practically choked out, his arms instantly loosening around his boyfriend as he sat up in bed. What was he saying? Did he want to break up? The idea sent a desperate sort of panic pooling in Tenya’s gut, and it must’ve been obvious, because even Katsuki himself seemed startled. Iida wasn’t one to show pain or express blatant emotion. It just wasn’t how he operated, and the blonde knew that. The raw look that crossed Tenya’s face when he spoke made Bakugo want to curl up and die.
“I didn’t mean- Not like that… Tenya, hey. I didn’t-.. I just don’t even know how to-... Shit. I’m sorry.”
He had gotten up next to the other, deeply uncomfortable and trying his damndest to even begin to explain what he meant. It was never his intention to... God, he fucked this up all the time, didn’t he? He looked up at his boyfriend with an exhausted, defeated expression, silently begging him to understand.
“You want to break up after we graduate?”
Iida asked softly, trying to hide the waver in his voice. It wasn’t like him to be so emotional, but he had grown shamelessly attached to Katsuki during their time together. The thought of losing him hadn’t even crossed his mind once; the fact that it seemed to cross Bakugo’s so intensely was unnerving.
“That’s not what I’m saying.”
“Then what are you trying to insinuate? I don’t understand.”
“Will you even want to be with me?”
He blurted, letting the silliest of worries fall from his lips in an instant. Iida looked at him incredulously, and Bakugo couldn’t help but feel something akin to embarrassment as the taller man’s hand settled on his back.
“That’s a ridiculous question. Why wouldn’t I?”
"I don't know."
Bakugo shrugged dismissively and tried to pry himself away, but Iida wasn't having it. Something was clearly wrong beyond what Katsuki was insisting, and chalking it up to him wanting to end things didn't feel right. His fidgeting hands, darting eyes (which generally seemed to fall upon anything other than Iida), and general aversion towards the situation as a whole made that clear.
"I believe you do know, you just don't want to talk about it."
"Not everything has to be something, Tenya, can you just-"
"I love you."
The blonde fell instantly silent, guilt eating at his heart.
"I love you quite a lot. And I would hope you'd know that by now, but for some reason you don't seem to." Iida paused and slid his hand into Bakugo's. "Please let me help you. Let me listen; let me understand. The last thing I want is for you to doubt what I feel."
Bakugo hated all of this. No part of him would ever get used to opening up or talking about his emotions. Everything had been much better since the war ended, sure. Since he had recovered and made a conscious effort to be more open with the people he cared about, things had been easier. He had been in better spirits; less angry, less guilty, less full of spite and animosity towards himself and others. (What happened to Izuku still ate at him, though, and it was one of several things he wasn't too keen on opening up about.)
Despite all of his efforts, it would never be easy with Iida. Iida pushed him to his absolute limit no matter the context, yet never seemed to go past it. Always teetering on the edge. Bakugo knew he would always have something of a rough exterior because, let's be honest, that's just how he was as a person, but he always found himself trying to be better for Iida. He fought harder, became softer, grew stronger, loved more gently; whether it was conscious or not, he always tried.
They fought for similar achievements in life, but Bakugo knew Iida was destined to soar beyond the stars. Bakugo wanted to be something great, of course, but Iida would be something great, far above wherever the blonde inevitably fell. Iida was kind where he was critical; Iida was disciplined where he was spontaneous; Iida was a powerhouse of utter perfection whereas he was a brash, loud-mouthed asshole whose general outlook on life would only cause issues for everyone else.
Bakugo knew it, but he didn't understand why Iida didn't. It was so violently obvious it should've smacked him in the face the day they started dating; Bakugo only dragged him down.
"You don't need me." He couldn't stand how weak he sounded. "The older we get, the more I'll hold you back."
Iida's grip on his hand tightened almost imperceptibly, and he couldn't bear to meet his eyes. He already knew just what look he would be giving him. It was the same one he gave him every time; the one that seemed to rip open the very depths of his soul and grasp its most profound vulnerabilities. The one that seemed to say: 'How could you possibly be so insecure?'
"I don't want to break up, that's not what I'm trying to say… That's the last thing I want. I just think you should, and I think you will. I think you're going to realize I'm only going to fuck you over in the future. I can't stay out of trouble—it's fucking impossible for some reason—and I'm just so-.. reactive, it's how I am, and I can't-.. I can't just stop. I'm always going to be that way, and I swear to God I try so hard to make things easier for you, but I just- I can't do that forever. I can't just put all my shit to rest no matter how hard I try. I'm going to end up getting you in trouble and I know it's going to happen and I can't let myself ruin your life when I see how fucking hard you work every single day and I can't-.. do that to you, I can't, I-"
"Katsuki-"
"I'm going to make you hate me and I know I will, you're-.. You're going to figure me out one day and you're going to realize that you made the worst mistake of your entire fucking life and you're going to think back and wonder why you didn't listen to everyone around you when they told you-.. when I told you what I would do, Tenya, you don't-.."
"Katsuki. Hey, hey… Please."
Bakugo's eyes were watering, body shaking like a leaf as Iida took his face in his hands. His chest rose and fell rapidly and he wasn't completely aware of what had just come out of his mouth; only that he was losing it.
"Look at me."
His words were gentle, and Bakugo's glassy gaze jerked upwards in an instant. He wasn't angry.
"You will never hold me back, I promise. I value us both too much to let that happen, and I honestly doubt it's possible. You are relentlessly strong. If anything, I'll be the one holding you back. I've gotten in much more trouble during my time here than you have."
Iida smiled, and despite all the stern, angular features of his face, he looked soft.
"Remember our first year? I was young, foolish, and I believed I could end the hero killer's reign of terror by myself. I was reckless and irresponsible; I put people I care about in harm's way. Nothing you've done has ever surpassed such levels of imprudence. The way you feel—the way you experience emotion in here," Iida paused to press a finger to Bakugo's forehead. "—will never make me love you any less. I'm not much better myself, and you of all people should know that. You're so strong—I could never do the half of what you do—and I aspire to be what you are to the world. People look to you in times of need because they know you will pull through and save them. No matter how harshly you present yourself, you are a good person, Katsuki. You're a hero, and you will never drag me down."
As a single tear rolled down Bakugo's face, Iida's thumb was quick to wipe it away. The former merely took a deep, shuddering breath and wrapped his arms around his lover, burying his face in his shoulder and breathing him in. He felt warm, safe, and he wasn't sure what to say, but the way Iida held him told him he didn't need to say anything at all. They understood each other in silence, understood each other in uncertainty, and they were prepared to handle anything together.
"I love you."
Bakugo muttered against his boyfriend's skin. It would take years of convincing to make Katsuki understand even a fraction of what he saw, but Iida was determined to make it happen.
"…Help me out with my suit."