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The first time Stacey saw her, she was mesmerized.
She had gone out to buy a few ingredients her mother needed for the tinola she was cooking that night.
The evening air felt cool against her skin, the gentle breeze running goosebumps along her body. It was a nice night out; not a cloud in sight, and the moon a beautiful yellow shade.
She passed by the plaza, always so full of life. The constant chatter of crowds, the sounds of children squealing, the whisper of gossip. It was a sound Stacey had gotten used to all her life. A kind of music that evoked nostalgia; a melody that spoke of home.
So when Stacey had heard her voice for the first time, it stood out from all the background noise, like a trumpet announcing someone’s arrival.
That might be a little bit OA, she admits. But considering her stomach didn’t just do flips, but rather shook with the percussion of an entire orchestra, her reaction is probably warranted.
There in the middle of the plaza stood a girl, wearing a guitar around her neck, singing into the microphone for everyone to hear. Her leather jacket paired well with her long skirt, probably to keep her warm from the evening breeze. She had a relaxed look on her face as she sang, eyes closed and hair loose. Her smile is wide as she sways along to the melody.
It was mesmerizing really, but Stacey only allowed herself to glance from the corner of her eyes, not wanting to be caught staring.
The girl opened her eyes and for a moment Stacey swore she was looking in her direction, but her sideways glance offered limited visibility. She didn’t want to stick around to find out, so she quickly made her way home, the girl’s voice still playing in her ears even from a distance.
Stacey doesn’t really like going out all that much. She’d run a few errands for her mother, and go to church on Sundays. She worked from home which meant she didn’t need to bother stressing about traffic. It was a dream.
It’s not that she had any problems about going out; she just preferred not to. She’s perfectly content and at peace being at home, relaxing with her cats and her care bears.
Which is why her mother found it strange when she started going out every night.
“San ba punta mo Staku?”
“Sa plaza lang po mommy. Gusto ko kase maglakad-lakad. Sabi ni Ate Aiah maganda daw nakakapag 10,000 steps araw araw.”
“Sige. Ingat ka lang at wag masyado magpagabi”
True to her word, Stacey would walk around the plaza, trying to get her steps in. And that proved to be an effective strategy because it allowed her to crosspaths where the pretty girl was busking.
She never made a move, never took a chance to openly look directly at the other girl. She was just too shy to do it, not knowing what to say.
For now she’s happy to simply steal glances wherever she walks by. She’s done it so many times that she’s been able to piece together what the girl looks like more and more, every night focusing on a different aspect from a different angle.
One night, she was out with her friends and they caught her subtle staring.
“Grabe ka naman makatitig beh. Baka matunaw yan.” Sheena jokes.
“H-huh?” she stammered, darting her eyes away from the pretty girl singing in the middle. “Anong pinagsasasabi mo?”
Maloi snorted in amusement at her response. “Hindi ganung ka-subtle ang mga pa-sulyap sulyap mo beh.”
“Ang sulyap? Wala naman akong ginagawa?” she continued to deny.
Aiah laughed “Staku my dear, you’re so obvious. Bakit hindi mo nalang kausapin pagkatapos nya kumanta?”
“Onga teh parang ako napapagod sa ginagawa mo. Hindi ba sumasakit mata mo sa kakatingin ng ganung kalayo sa side?” Sheena grimaced. “Kung ako yan malulula siguro ako.”
“Wala akong sinusulyapan. Mga gawa gawa nyo nanaman talaga.”
“Ah so okay lang kung tawagin ko–” Maloi stood up, raising her hand to gesture at the busking singer.
“ATE MALOI!” Stacey squeaked, grabbing the older girl’s raised hand and pulling her back down. “Nakakahiya!”
“Kanino? Tatawagin ko lang naman si kuyang nagbebenta ng taho.” Maloi grinned, eyebrows raised teasingly.
All her friends laughed as she blushed, rolling her eyes at their jabs.
“Bakit kase hindi mo nalang tignan ng straight? Para you don’t have to keep glancing at her from the side.” Aiah asked
“Ate Aiah hindi naman kase yan straight.” Sheena responded, earning a smack from Stacey.
“Alam nyo, ewan ko sa inyo.” Stacey huffed, face flushed from embarrassment.
Even when they were walking out of the plaza, Stacey would still steal glances at the girl serenading the crowd.
Mustering up her courage and figuring the girl would be distracted by all the onlookers, she quickly turned her to look at the girl fully.
And felt her heart drop when she realized the girl was staring straight at her.
Stacey yelped and faced forward again, her cheeks reddening considerably at the fact that she got caught.
“Huy! Anyare sayo? Okay ka lang?” Maloi asked.
“Nagulat lang ako.” Stacey excused, increasing her pace going home.
Despite that little incident, she continued to walk the plaza every night for a free show from the ‘pretty busking girl’.
It’s become a part of her daily routine, and she can’t bring herself to stop. While the sounds of the plaza reminded her of the home she has been living in all her life, the busking girl’s voice made her feel like she was on a journey she hasn’t figured out yet.
Each song she sings just brings Stacey closer and closer to the girl’s gravity, until without even realizing it, she had begun sitting on the nearest park bench to the singer.
She’d keep herself busy, like reading a few chapters of a book, or doing some work on her laptop. Hell, she even brought a rubik's cube and spent the next hour figuring out how to solve it. Anything, anything just to stop her eyes from lifting up and obsessively staring at the singer.
It’s crazy how magnetizing the girl’s presence is. Stacey could feel every cell in her body begging her to look up, because just maybe, she’ll find the other girl staring back at her again. But she stops herself because the last time it had happened, her nerve-endings lit up all at once and she was a crazy mess.
No. She’s content with her little glances for now, happy to be in the other girl’s presence to admire her and listen to her music.
One Sunday morning, Stacey found herself walking behind her mother, dragging their foldable cart full of food. There were so many groceries, way more than necessary for two people. Why her mother needed so much food? She didn’t know
But she found out her answer later that day when her mother announced that she was bringing some of the morcon she had just finished cooking to their new neighbors.
“May bagong kapitbahay mommy? Kailan pa?”
“Nako mag two weeks na din. Ang tagal ko na silang gusto dalhan ng pagkain pero alam mo naman nabusy ako. Tara Staku ihatid natin toh.”
Her mother always insisted on being friendly with everyone in the neighborhood. It was a small community after all. So Stacey isn’t so surprised that she’d insist on visiting any newcomers.
She went along of course, even though she really wished she was just at home relaxing.
“Ay good afternoon kumare!” Her mom greeted them as soon as their new neighbors answered the door. “Gusto lang sana namin i-welcome kayo dito sa aming lugar. Eto may dala kaming pagkain.”
“Hala nako salamat at nag-abala ka pa–”
Stacey sort of tuned out from that point, mind drifting to the girl busking in the plaza again. She wonders what the girl will sing later tonight? Hopefully she gets to stay longer to make up for lost time, considering she’d been too busy to visit for a few nights.
She misses the other girl’s voice already.
Her eyes catch sight of something on the porch, a familiar guitar sitting on the outdoor chair, pieces of paper strewn across the coffee table.
“Anak halika dito! Ipapakilala kita sa mga kapitbahay natin!”
She’s been so used to viewing things from an angle that she immediately noticed the arrival of one more person at the door; a figure that’s all too familiar to her. Her breath gets caught in her throat as she realizes who it was.
After all, she’d been listening to her sing for the last 2 weeks.
“Ito nga pala ang anak ko, si Jhoanna. Jhoanna ito ang mga Sevilleja. Kapitbahay natin dyan lang sa malapit.”
“Hello po” the newcomer said, her voice melodic and bright.
Stacey couldn’t help herself from looking. From this distance, the pull was so strong that she couldn’t stop herself from facing forward, eyes locking immediately with that of the other girl’s.
The same girl she’s been watching perform for weeks.
Jhoanna
So that’s her name.
“Nice to meet you Jhoanna!” her mother greeted. “Eto nga pala ang anak ko. Tingin ko ka-edad mo lang din. Si Stacey.”
“Hi Stacey,” Jhoanna smiles at her, extending her hand out.
Stacey remains frozen, eyes wide, mouth slightly agape, as she tries to process what’s happening. She finds herself caught in a trap as she stares down into Jhoanna’s deep doe-like eyes, which shine with joy, gentleness, and maybe even a little bit of amusement?
“Staku,” her mother nudges her. Stacey snaps out of it, shaking her head as she blushes, before taking the other girl’s hand to return the offer.
“Hi. Nice to meet you.” she said shyly, clearing her throat, embarrassed at the way she had malfunctioned in front of the other girl.
As they walk back home, her mother looks at her with a glint in her eyes and a knowing smile that irked her to no end.
“What?” she huffed, cheeks still tainted with lingering redness.
“Cute nung Jhoanna noh?”
“MA!”
Her mother laughs, “bakit? Mali ba ako? May itsura yung bata. Matangkad. And tulad ng sabi ni kumare, kumakanta daw. Parang sa pagkakaalam ko ganung yung type m–”
“Oo na mommy gets ko na.” Stacey blushed, hands covering her face. “Baka marinig ka pa ma,” she whined.
“Oo na eto na titigil na,” her mother chuckles.
Stacey sighed in relief; her heart still hasn’t recovered from that whole exchange.
“Pero I’m just saying I would totally approve”
“MA!”
Stacey had steered clear of the plaza for a couple more nights. To be fair, she was just so loaded with work that she didn’t have time to go on strolls.
At least, that’s what she told herself.
But one night, after a particularly horrible day, she found herself seeking comfort and needing a break.
Which is how she found herself once again seated on a bench in the plaza.
This time when she arrives, Jhoanna waves at her and gives her that smile– the adorable one where her dimples are on full display. It’s unfair really how one could be so unbelievably attractive and adorable at the same time.
Stacey waves back shyly, before focusing on the book she brought over, all the while stealing glances at the other girl as she performed.
She sat there throughout the girl’s two-hour set, letting herself be immersed in the melodies and the music coming out from Jhoanna; her beautiful voice echoing across the plaza.
Even though she’d seen her like this many times, it’s still a wonder to Stacey how the other girl manages to draw people in. Crowds that were busy with other things, all suddenly stopping to watch and sing along. Children that are playing, all dancing around Jhoanna as she sings. It was a sight to see, like heavenly bodies circling around a center of gravity.
And Stacey was no different, captivated by the other girl, as she continued to watch from the corner of her eyes.
Stacey began to fix her things to leave. With the night getting later, people are starting to go home, the noise in the plaza dying down to mild chatter.
Suddenly, from the corner of her eyes, she sees someone sit on the bench next to her. She freezes as the all too familiar figure places a guitar case on the ground before suddenly speaking.
“Stacey?” Jhoanna calls her.
“Oh Jhoanna. Hello." She smiles timidly.
“Na-enjoy mo ba yung performance ko tonight?”
“Maganda naman oo. Galing mo kumanta.”
“Talaga?” Jhoanna said, smiling wider and leaning closer now.
Jusko ang lapit nya. Wag kang ngumiti ng ganyan sakin please. Stacey gulped before nodding. “Oo naman. Obvious naman sa dami ng mga nakinig.”
“Mas gusto ko pag ikaw nakikinig eh.”
“Ha?”
“Wala sabi ko, ilang araw na kitang hindi nakikita dito.”
“Oh…medyo naging busy kase. Napansin mo pa pala yun." She laughed nervously.
"Oo naman. Nasanay na akong nakikita kang nanonood eh."
"Ah nagkakataon lang kase mahilig talaga ako maglakad dito sa plaza." Stacey excused, trying to keep her voice steady.
“Ah talaga ba? So wala lang yung lagi mong pagtitig sakin?” Jhoanna grins, eyebrows wiggling suggestively.
Stacey’s entire face turns a bright red as she stammers out a response. “A-ano pinagsasasabi mo dyan? Hindi kita tinititigan ah! Feeler neto,” she huffs, looking away to hide her face,
“Ah oo nga pala. Mas mahilig ka dun sa pasulyap sulyap lang na pagtingin.” Jhoanna teased further, her smile widening even more as she scooted closer.
Stacey yelped at the sudden closeness, “alam mo ikaw andami mong alam. Hindi kita tinitignan noh! Guni-guni mo lang yun.” She responded as she tried to slow down her heartbeats; the close proximity making her feel lightheaded.
“Ganun ba?” Stacey nearly flipped when Jhoanna suddenly pouted, eyes shining like pearls as she stared deep into her eyes. “Bakit hindi?”
“H-ha?”
“Bakit hindi ka nakatingin sakin?”
“Anong pinagsa–”
“Gusto ko kase pag nakatingin ka sakin.” Jhoanna looked down, smiling with a blush on her cheeks. “Kase gusto din kitang tignan eh. Kung okay lang.”
Stacey looked at her with wide eyes, mouth parted slightly, as her brain short-circuited. Was this really happening right now?
“I mean kung okay lang naman kase baka ayaw mo pala. Mali ba pagkaintindi ko kase minsan medyo slow talaga ako–”
“Jho,” Stacey reaches out to hold the other girl’s hand, trying to stop her own from shaking. Her heart was thundering loudly. “I— oo, gusto pa kitang makita. Yung hindi pasulyap sulyap lang. Kung okay lang sayo. Baka bigla ka magtago o tumakbo eh," she joked, trying to ease her nerves.
Jhoanna looked up and she was smiling so widely, that it made Stacey mirror it with her own smile. She felt so lightheaded, like she might pass out at any moment.
“Syempre okay lang Stacey. Ikaw na yan eh. Kung may prinsensa ba namang nakatingin, hinding hindi talaga ako magtatago.”