Chapter Text
I had always hated rain.
Cold and damp, the nighttime air blew violently around me, a strong chill seeping past my jacket, through my sweater and into my skin. With each heavy breath, puffs of what looked to be steam shot from my lips and nose, curling up and outwards into the sky before fading into nothing. It had been gloomy the past couple of days, but today? Shit was practically pouring . It was bad to drive in, worse so to walk. But where I was going, I couldn’t let anyone take me.
It wasn’t bad. At least, not to the public eye. People knew about it- like a local secret, kept hidden from the everyday pass-through outsider. I couldn’t be tied to it, though. The city was big, but in this community, news spread like wildfire. The people around here remembered names, faces. On my own, I'd have nothing to worry about, but my family…I could hear them now, one after the other.
“Even if I don’t agree with your choice, just remember we’ll always love and pray for you.”
“You’re still a lesbian?”
“Lezzing it up finally, I see. How was it, girl?”
I grit my teeth, and my feet picked up their pace, my hands shoved deep into my pockets. I wasn’t a damn lesbian . I liked myself some women, sure, but I didn’t only like one thing. And I wasn’t a damn girl . But what else could I be, really? Round babyface, height barely scraping 5’1, and tits so big you could fit ‘em in a pitcher’s glove. I wasn’t shaped much like a man- broad shoulders, sure, but not mannish- and I sure as hell didn’t sound like one. My feet sped up again, my mind flashing through the instructions given to me. Down 17th street, turn into the alley halfway through, then a left, then two rights, and there it was.
The brick building was small and shoddy-looking. A measly two stories- an outlier amongst the towering skyscrapers of metal and glass. There was a lone outward-facing door, bathed in a flickering sea of magenta from the large neon sign above. The plastic and wire bent and turned, curving to form delicate cursive lettering. Fae’s Lounge , it read.
I couldn’t help but stand and stare at the sign. I stared at it for a long time, my fists clenching and unclenching in my pockets. Fae’s was the type of place everyone knew about, but very few people were seen going in and out of. A gay bar– the only one in my area for miles. Even in its proximity, it was still a ways away from my neighborhood. As you can imagine, the business district wasn’t all that known for a bumping nightlife.
Was this that good of an idea? What the hell was I thinking, coming here? I could easily turn back, could swing right around and take the bus back home. With each flicker of the sign, I could feel my resolve crumble. I shouldn’t have come here, It was too risky. I didn’t even like bars, and what was I supposed to do once I got inside? A hookup of any kind was out of the question. I was too woman-ish for the types of fellows I was into, and not woman enough for the ladies I’d be down to hang with. I deliberated more, my brows furrowing.
In hindsight, I wonder if I ever had a choice to begin with.
Just as I turned to leave, the hatch on the upper half of the door slid open, the only thing visible being the smooth, sleek shine of a pair of sunglasses. In the dim night, they stood out like vast seas of black. A passing car briefly illuminated them, the streak of light travelling from one end to another before disappearing in a wink of starlight at the brim. Between us, a long moment of silence stretched, our eyes locked in a quiet battle of wills.
“Name and business.” His voice was deep. Baritone and smooth, it rumbled from behind the door.
“I was just leaving.” Mine wasn’t. High and soft and unbearably weak. It wavered through the air, unsure and unsteady. I winced, pushing myself further into my jacket. Two sizes too big, I was sure it swallowed me up. I looked ridiculous.
“You’ve been standing out there an awful long time.” He fired back.
“Just looking, is all.”
“You look real cold.” A pause. I could see him shift, a smirk just barely visible through the slotted hole, his thick lips quirked up and stretched wide. “Come inside, kid. The rain's not letting up any time soon.”
And with not even a breath from me, the chunky locks of the door slid open one by one, muffled yet oh so clear to me. Before I knew it, I was shuffling inside, my small frame still shuddering from the residual chill. The door slammed behind me, and I winced.
No turning back now.