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The weather was cold and frosty, enough that as Ji-yeong walked down the street her breath was turning into fog. Her fingers were turning blue from the cold and the only thing keeping them from falling off were the two coffees she had gotten after her shift ended at the coffee shop in downtown Seoul.
She was on her way to Sae-byeok’s place. They hadn’t seen each other all week and Ji-yeong had missed her terribly. Part of the reason was because it had been exam season, and another part was because Sae-byeok had recently doubled her shifts to be able to properly handle living with her mother and her brother, Cheol.
The two had been officially dating a few days after Ji-yeong had turned twenty, which meant that they had been together for almost seven months. Not to mention their stubborn homoerotic friendship that lasted a year before that. Ji-yeong always laughs thinking of that time of their relationship while Sae-byeok usually grimaces and comments on how oblivious both of them had been.
Snow crunched underneath Ji-yeong’s shoes as she walked. Sae-byeok lived in the outskirts of Seoul, so she had to take the subway and then walk twenty minutes. She wasn’t going to complain though, she enjoyed walking whenever winter came around. It was her favourite time of the year. The snow, the cold. God, Ji-yeong loved the cold. She didn’t know why, but something about crawling into bed intertwined with a particular warm body after being out in the cold all day really was something she found herself looking forward to.
(Ji-yeong guesses this is a revelation that had been discovered in the last year.)
She just loved the way her hands would turn to ice and all different sorts of dull colours in reaction to the cold. The feeling of pain in her fingers, quite literally freezing, was something she, weirdly enough, liked. Sae-byeok, on the other hand, would always shove her gloves onto Ji-yeong’s and tell her off for being so careless.
It was dark out, too. The only light saving Ji-yeong from tripping and falling flat on her face was that of the streetlamps that were found every few meters. Sae-byeok lived in a small, quiet town. It wasn’t surprising that there wasn’t much care to lighting around the area. Ji-yeong’s circumstances were somewhat similar though she lived closer to everything than Sae-byeok did.
Ji-yeong carefully stepped closer to Sae-byeok’s home and almost slipped, quickly grabbing onto her front fence with one hand as the coffee holder almost tumbled out of her other hand. Letting out a little breath of relief as she steadied herself, she opened the gate leading up to their front door.
Ji-yeong was about to knock on the front door when she stopped herself. Since she had worked the night shift and had been in charge of closing up shop, it was almost one in the morning by the time she was standing in front of the Kangs front door. Mrs. Kang and Cheol were most probably fast asleep, and she wouldn’t want to disturb them. Hell, even Sae-byeok could be asleep. She hadn’t exactly told her girlfriend she would be coming over, which might’ve been stupid but she wanted to make a gesture.
She was about to take out her phone and call Sae-byeok to come down and open the door until she glanced up at the house. She told herself she should probably check to see if Sae-byeok was awake. What if she was fast asleep and got annoyed at the fact that Ji-yeong had woken her up? It had happened before. Sae-byeok, surprisingly, valued her sleep just as much as she valued breathing. On top of that, she was awfully on edge when being woken up abruptly. Then again, knowing of her past endeavours, Ji-yeong couldn’t really blame Sae-byeok for that.
✦
It was at the beginning of their friendship. Ji-yeong had just finished her classes when she skipped over to the Kang home to pay a visit to Sae-byeok. The taller had told her she could come by at any time of the day so that they could share the bungeoppang ice cream the two had bought two days before and had stored in Ji-yeong’s fridge.
Ji-yeong hopped over the gate and walked up to the front door. She sent Sae-byeok a message that she was out front and waited a few minutes. When no response came, Ji-yeong frowned at her phone. Maybe Sae-byeok was just busy and couldn’t share bungeoppang with her today. She felt her chest swirl with an emotion of disappointment and turned around, ready to retreat home and store the ice cream for another day.
Just as she was about to leave, the door clicked open and a voice sounded out behind her.
“Ah, Ji-yeong? Is that you?”
Ji-yeong quickly swirled around and felt her heart beat ten times faster. She had met Mrs. Kang a handful of times before, but Sae-byeok had always been right next to her. She had no idea why she felt so nervous to be alone with her friend's mother. She clutched the box of ice cream and smiled.
“Mrs. Kang!” She quickly bowed.
“I thought that was you, your little blonde colourings have grown out a little since the last time I saw you,” Mrs. Kang smiled warmly, saying that as if she hadn’t just seen Ji-yeong last week.
“Have they? Ah, I guess I have to fix that soon, then.” Ji-yeong laughed a little, the nerves in her body settling as she touched the tips of her hair.
“Are you going somewhere?” Ji-yeong asked, glancing down at the plastic bags in Mrs. Kang’s hands.
“Oh, just the market. It’s quite warm out, so I thought I’d make a day of it.” She smiled and stepped aside from the door. “Sae-byeok is upstairs. Come in and make yourself at home.
“Ah,” Ji-yeong opened her mouth and closed it, hesitating. “I wouldn’t want to intrude–”
“Nonsense. You’re her good friend, I’m sure she’ll be okay with you going up to her room.”
Ji-yeong scratched her neck and once she decided she might as well go in, she bowed once again and entered the house. She waved goodbye to Mrs. Kang and turned back around, looking around. It felt weird not having anyone in her line of sight, Cheol was usually playing video games on the couch whenever she came over, but he must be at school at this time of day.
Oh well, she might as well go inform Sae-byeok that she’s here. She treads up the stairs, her hand sliding over the railing, wondering why Sae-byeok hadn’t responded to her message. Sure, she was a dry texter, but she usually answered within five minutes.
She knocked on Sae-byeok’s door two times and waited for an answer.
After a few seconds of nothing, Ji-yeong tilted her head. “Sae-byeok? It’s me, Ji-yeong,” She said into the door.
Still no response.
“I’m coming in, okay?” She said again, pushing the door open.
Ji-yeong looked around the room until her eyes landed on the bed. Sae-byeok was fast asleep, curled onto her side with a thick blanket pulled around her. Ji-yeong stared for a few seconds and swore her heart was about to melt.
For once, Sae-byeok looked at peace. Even though she still had that crease between her eyebrows while she slept, she looked so…secure. It was different from the times Ji-yeong had seen her awake, her usual stone-faced expression that gave away nothing but disdain and lack of interest in anything around her.
She stepped closer to the bed, admiring the taller, noticing how her chest slowly rose with her sleepy breaths. Ji-yeong had never seen Sae-byeok asleep, and she wasn’t sure if what she was feeling was normal considering all she was doing was looking at one of her closest friends sleep.
After a good minute of watching her, she realised just staring at her friend was a little way-too-weird to do.
“Sae-byeok…?”
Nothing.
So, naturally, Ji-yeong walked closer, towering over the girl. She thought of what to do, how to wake her up if her voice wasn’t enough. She’d figured that Sae-byeok would be a light sleeper considering she was always so damn alert, but she had guessed wrong it seemed.
Ji-yeong stuck out a hand and carefully lowered it onto Sae-byeok’s shoulder. The moment her fingertips touched her skin, the taller immediately woke up. She grabbed Ji-yeong by her shoulder and smashed her into the bed, and not in the way Ji-yeong had spent nights daydreaming about.
It happened in the blink of an eye really. One moment she was standing up, gazing at her friend who was deep in sleep and the next she was pinned underneath her, her forearm pressing into her ribcage with a small knife to her throat.
“Woah, woah,” Ji-yeong gasped out, staring at Sae-byeok. “I know you hate how I bother you all the time but c'mon, cutting my throat isn’t going to do us any good.” She joked, her initial surprise being swept away.
“What are you doing here?” She asked, not moving from Ji-yeong.
“You told me I could come over whenever to eat the bungeoppang, remember?” The shorter replied, struggling a little under the tight hold. She shook the bag of ice cream that was still dangling from her fingers as proof.
Another minute passed. Perhaps Sae-byeok was trying to recall when exactly she had told Ji-yeong she could come over. To be fair, most of the time Ji-yeong just announced that they would do things without letting the taller have any input, but this time she had made sure Sae-byeok was the one to invite her over.
“How’d you get inside?” She further questioned, knife still to Ji-yeong’s throat. Seriously, how long was Sae-byeok going to press the blade to her neck? It was starting to get a little uncomfortable, on top of the fact that she was so close to her face she could lean up and kiss her if she wanted to.
“Your mom, she opened the door as I was at the front,”
“Mom? She’s supposed to be out during the day.” Sae-byeok mumbled, mostly to herself.
“She was just leaving and told me to come in. I wouldn’t have if I had known I was going to get my jugular slashed open by your comfort knife.”
It seemed to register in Sae-byeok’s mind that this was in fact Ji-yeong that had woken her up and not some intruder, and that she was pinning her down and hovering over her body leaving little to no space for them to breathe. Sae-byeok let her go and pulled the knife away, standing up and pulling at her shirt a little, probably out of the awkward feeling that came when she realised what just happened.
“Jeez, Sae,” Ji-yeong teased, a slight nervousness in her voice as she sat up on her elbows. “I’m all for you pinning me down and stuff, but knife play is a big no- for now atleast.”
“Shut up,” Sae-byeok breathed out, her face slightly tinted pink. “I told you not to call me that.”
“As if you control what I do and say,” Ji-yeong mocked, sitting up properly now, splaying her hands on her knees.
Sae-byeok just stared at her. That’s what Sae-byeok does. Stares with that stupid expressionless look on her face. It would be intimidating to anyone else, but to Ji-yeong it had always just been her face. Nothing intimidating about it. Infuriating, maybe.
A beat of silence passed by and Ji-yeong hummed. “So are we just going to stand here or are we going to dig into some delicious bungeoppang?”
✦
She rounded the side of the small house, walking to the corner at which Sae-byeok’s room windows were on the second floor. Ji-yeong squinted for a moment before noticing that Sae-byeok’s small desk lamp was on, meaning she must be awake. She hated sleeping with the lights on.
Ji-yeong could text Sae-byeok that she was around, but what fun was that? The whole point of coming over was to surprise the taller. She thought about yelling out Sae-byeok’s name but that would just wake Mrs. Kang and Cheol up and would result in a very, very not-blindingly-sexy glare from Sae-byeok.
Ji-yeong thought back to the movie she and Sae-byeok had watched with their friends a couple months back. There was a scene in which the main guy, who Ji-yeong thought was way too ugly for the lead girl, held a boombox over his head outside of her window. She remembered how she made a comment about how yuck and basic the scene was and how Sae-byeok had slightly shrugged and said she thought it was thoughtful.
Thoughtful was as close to cute as it could get when Sae-byeok would speak about something other than Ji-yeong.
But, alas, Ji-yeong had no boombox around her. She doubted that she could hold one over her head, her bony arms way too puny. At that thought, she imagined Sae-byeok holding it up. She was incredibly strong.
Ji-yeong snapped herself out of her thoughts and sighed. Maybe she could chuck a pebble or two at her window. That was romantic enough.
She looked down at the snow covering most of her shoes and her shoulders slumped. As much as she liked the freezing feeling of frostbite, she wasn’t going to stick her entire forearm in the snow for some measly pebbles.
An idea took over her.
Ji-yeong carefully crouched down, balancing the coffee holder in one hand and collecting snow in the other. She was wearing gloves, sure, but she had cut off the tips of the fingertips to look cooler when she had bought them some time ago so the snow made her fingertips ache.
No matter. She was trying to be the super cool and kind girlfriend she was by bringing Sae-byeok coffee in a sweet way. That’s all that mattered, even if her fingers fell off.
Sae-byeok did most of the work when it came down to it, anyway.
She shaped the snow into a roundish shape (the best she could with only one hand) and looked up at the window. The lamp was still on. Ji-yeong aimed the ball toward the window and swung.
Apparently Ji-yeong was not only too weak to hold up a boombox, but she was also too weak to throw a snowball.
It landed way off of where she was aiming, not even hitting anything. She blinked a few times, grateful that no one was able to see that. Definitely knocked a few cool points down her radar.
She huffed as she crouched down again, collecting more snow in her palm. At this point, her teeth are clattering out of her jaw. She’d stupidly forgotten her scarf in the shop’s storage room.
This time she’d get it right.
She looked back up at the window and aimed, sticking her tongue out between her teeth with concentration. She’ll be able to hit the window and Sae-byeok’s cute confused expression would come up and smile sweetly down at her and kiss her hello and let her come in. After a moment with some newfound confidence and with all the force her tiny frame could muster, she chucked the snowball.
Not without falling over and landing face-flat and earning a mouthful of frosty snow, of course.
She immediately sat up, sputtering snow out and groaning. Atleast she had kept the coffee steady. Thank god they had lids.
What wasn’t intact, though, glared at her from the window above.
Ji-yeong looked up to see if she had been able to hit her target, and boy did she hit it.
Turns out, Sae-byeok’s window wasn’t closed.
Turns out, Sae-byeok had some sort of fucked up spidey sense and had walked right up to it, probably to close it just as Ji-yeong threw the snow.
Her eyes widened as she saw her girlfriend staring at her from her window, face covered in snow. She looked so stupid that Ji-yeong wanted to kiss her.
The two stared at each other before Sae-byeok wiped some snow away from her face, letting Ji-yeong see the oh-so-cold expression on her face shooting daggers down at her heart. Definitely not the cute, confused look she was looking for. She guessed that the urge to kiss Sae-byeok wasn’t exactly reciprocated.
The taller didn’t say anything and pulled her window shut, walking away.
“Shit,” Ji-yeong let out a nervous laugh escaping her lips as she stood up, brushing the snow off her jeans.
Not even ten minutes into trying to be romantic and Ji-yeong had already fucked up. Great. She doubted Sae-byeok would come down and let her in now. Plus, the surprise had been practically ruined. She probably saw Ji-yeong land on her face, take a mouthful of snow and the coffee she had brought.
Talk about keeping it cool.
She sighed and gathered herself. She walked around the house, ready to leave by the gate and wallow about missing her girlfriend and being basically rejected and having her mad at her. Perfect mood for the weather, really.
Just as she opened the gate, a whistle blew behind her. She glanced behind her and saw Sae-byeok standing at the door, leaning against the frame with arms crossed and looking so fucking cool despite wearing pajamas that Ji-yeong wanted to fall into the snow again and scream into it.
Sae-byeok stepped aside, signalling for Ji-yeong to come in. Okay, maybe she wasn’t in for it.
She graciously walked up the pathway to Sae-byeok’s front door (not without almost falling again. Seriously, what was wrong with her balance today?) and sheepishly pursed her lips up at the girl, trying to look apologetic.
The taller didn’t say a word as she let Ji-yeong in, shutting the door behind her and waiting for her as she took her shoes and coat off. She thought that maybe Sae-byeok would greet her with a hug, or a kiss to a cheek, but nothing.
The two silently walked up the stairs to Sae-byeok’s room. Sae-byeok walked behind her with the silence of a thousand moons. It scared the shit out of Ji-yeong in the best way possible. The feeling of her girlfriend walking behind her felt so fucking protective and scary it made her heart shake.
Although she’s pretty sure Sae-byeok’s feeling anything but protective right now.
They enter the room and Ji-yeong glances at the melting pieces of snow on the floor. She felt a little guilty. As she heard the door softly close behind them, she swivelled around.
“I brought you coffee,” Ji-yeong said, raising the coffee holder toward Sae-byeok. “with a side of ice.” She joked, smiling a little.
Sae-byeok raised a brow, arms crossed once again. She was wearing a t-shirt which let Ji-yeong see just how built she was and she had to stop herself from practically drooling over them in front of her angry girlfriend.
“Okay, that wasn’t really funny,” Ji-yeong’s shoulders slumped and she looked up at Sae-byeok. “But I–”
“What exactly made you come up to my window and attack me with a snowball at one in the morning?” Sae-byeok questioned, her voice steady.
“Um, that was hardly an attack,”
“You’re right. Your throw is mediocre, at best.”
Ji-yeong narrowed her eyes and huffed. “Listen, I was trying to be romantic, okay?”
“ Romantic.” Sae-byeok repeated, expression stoic.
“I was trying to surprise you!”
“With a snowball to my face.”
“That wasn’t part of the plan!” Ji-yeong groaned and set the cups down on Sae-byeok’s desk. She could never decide if Sae-byeok’s sarcasm was appealing or just downright annoying. A mix of both, she thought.
“What exactly was the plan?” The taller questioned, walking over to her desk and taking one of the cups and smelling it, making a face, and then switching to the other cup that was hers.
Ji-yeong watched Sae-byeok bring the cup to her lips and take a sip, all the while keeping her eyes trained on her. “I thought your window was closed . The snowball was just to get your attention to let me in.”
“The window was obviously open.”
“It was not.”
“It was.”
“Was not.”
“It was.”
Ji-yeong glares at the taller who only took another sip, licking her lips. Fuck, Ji-yeong couldn’t even try to be annoyed at Sae-byeok when she looked at her like that.
“Why didn’t you text me to let you in?”
“I already told you I was trying to be romantic and surprise you.” She grumbled, kicking at nothing. She felt embarrassed, like a child being told off. She hated it.
“Texting would have had the effect. I wasn’t expecting you or coffee. I would have been surprised either way”
“Texting doesn’t have any romantic effect. Especially with you.”
Sae-byeok tilts her head forward in a way Ji-yeong can never get over. Strands of her half-assed tied hair fell over her eyes and the questioning look she was giving Ji-yeong was murder-my-fucking-heart worthy.
“Are you going to keep interrogating me or can we just enjoy our drinks while they’re still lukewarm?” She said, annoyance laced in her tone. She was upset her plan hadn’t worked out and the fact that Sae-byeok was acting as if they hadn’t hardly seen each other wasn’t making her mood any better.
“I’m not stopping you from taking your coffee.”
Ji-yeong stared at Sae-byeok defiantly. That stupid face lack of emotion made her want to kick something. She noticed a small glimmer in Sae-byeok’s eye, probably the reflection of the moon.
She let out a sigh and walked over to the table and grabbed the cup. She brought it to her lips and let the flavours of it take over her mouth and replace the taste of snow. It wasn’t warm anymore. If that was a metaphor, Ji-yeong ignored it.
Sae-byeok’s arms found themselves curling around Ji-byeok’s waist and she had to swallow her sip before she spat it out from how Sae-byeok was squeezing her. Her entire body pressed against her behind.
“Your jeans are soaked,” She mumbled into Ji-yeong’s shoulder, leaning her head onto it. “and you smell of snow.”
“Snow doesn’t have a smell.” Ji-yeong replied, taking another sip and ignoring how Sae-byeok was wrapped behind her.
“It does.”
“What does it smell like then?”
“Like snow.”
Ji-yeong rolled her eyes. Sae-byeok’s deadpan nature was fine to her most of the time, and maybe she was trying to be a little funny, but right now? She just wanted to be taken seriously.
Jesus, when did she get so damn sensitive? Definitely not cool.
“I fell, maybe that’s why.”
“Yeah, I saw,” She mumbled into her shoulder. “It was a little funny.”
She felt kind of stupid coming all the way in the freezing snow right after work just to be treated as if they had seen each other hours ago instead of a week ago. Ji-yeong didn’t really understand why she was feeling so upset, Sae-byeok was just teasing her but it felt like a stab to her heart that she was joking around as if she hadn’t missed Ji-yeong as much as she missed her.
Sae-byeok must have sensed how Ji-yeong wasn’t reciprocating the affection and loosened her hold on her. Ji-yeong felt kind of bad. She knew Sae-byeok had difficulties with expressing herself, but come on. It’s not like she hadn’t ever immediately hugged Ji-yeong and given her a kiss after not seeing each other for even just a day. It’s not like Ji-yeong needed words from Sae-byeok. She didn’t expect that. She’d always been bigger on gifts and physical touch than anything else.
She finished her coffee, ignoring how the aftertaste filled her mouth with a disgustingly sweet feeling.
She turned to Sae-byeok, who had removed her arms from her and stared down at her as if expecting Ji-yeong to say anything.
A beat passed.
“Guess I’ll get going now, then.” Ji-yeong finally said before giving Sae-byeok a final look before walking over to her room door.
Sae-byeok’s mouth opened and closed once and again as Ji-yeong walked. She felt her chest cave with a sudden flush of unease as she realised her girlfriend was genuinely annoyed with her.
“Wait,” She said as Ji-yeong put her hand on the handle to leave. “Where are you going?” She stupidly asked.
Where are you going? She was obviously going to go back to her place. Where else would Ji-yeong go if not with Sae-byeok?
Ji-yeong turned her head and looked at Sae-byeok, an utter look of indifference in her eyes. That was the thing with Ji-yeong. She could be the bubbliest and happiest, her smile warming up a room with her sudden surge of excitement, and she could be…well, like this . No emotion in her eyes, in her posture and in her expression. As if nothing mattered whatsoever and everything was just a game she didn’t want to play part in.
“Home.”
Your home is with me.
“Why?” Sae-byeok dully asked, shoving her hands in her shorts pockets.
“You’re obviously not so excited to see me, so,” She tilted her head and Sae-byeok wanted to take two steps forward and kiss her. “I might as well head back and leave you to your devices.”
“What?” Sae-byeok said, her voice wavering in surprise in such a slight way no one would be able to notice. No one except Ji-yeong, she supposed as she saw Ji-yeong’s expression twitch. “Of course I’m happy to see you.”
“Doesn’t seem like it.”
That look on Ji-yeong’s face made Sae-byeok want to get down on her knees and beg for her forgiveness. She hated that.
Why was Ji-yeong acting like Sae-byeok hadn’t hugged her and she was the one to not reciprocate? She felt a twinge of annoyance poke at her chest and swallowed.
“I hugged you.”
“Right,” Ji-yeong nodded. “Perfect welcome to your girlfriend, right? I come over and get you coffee at one in the morning and you act all cold and menacing, and a hug makes everything fine.”
“I’m sorry if being hit in the face with a snowball made me a little less excited to see you,” Sae-byeok said, the words falling out of her mouth. “You can’t expect me to be happy about that.”
An emotion flickered on Ji-yeong’s face. “I was trying to do something nice.”
“Way to go on being extra.”
“Seriously?” Ji-yeong scoffed and took her hand off the door handle.
Sae-byeok inwardly cringed. Ji-yeong was, as much as she’d hate to admit it, somewhat right. Sae-byeok was being harsh, but she couldn’t help it. She always said the wrong things whenever she felt challenged.
Ji-yeong stepped forward, a look of annoyance falling over her indifference. “I wasn’t being extra .” She’s face to face (well, face to chest) with Sae-byeok now, looking up at her. “I was being a decent fucking human by coming to pay you a visit.”
The taller doesn’t say anything. She stands her ground, hands in her pockets. She guesses that Ji-yeong is further infuriated by her displayed nonchalance and scoffs in her face.
“You know how long it’s been since we haven’t seen each other?” Ji-yeong frowned up at Sae-byeok. “Didn’t you feel how long it had been?”
She had felt it.
It had been seven days and an hour and half since she last saw her.
Hell, she had felt it in every single cell of her body. Ji-yeong’s absence made an enormous difference to her life. She wanted to say it, wanted to tell Ji-yeong that she was sorry and that it’s okay that she took a snowball to the face, and that she was grateful for her to be in front of her right now. She wanted to, really.
She just couldn’t find any words to say it. She never could.
Still displaying that unwavering expression, Ji-yeong searched Sae-byeok’s eyes. Despite the taller constantly somehow masking her emotions, remaining stoic and giving nothing but a glare away, it was her eyes that one would have to look at. Ji-yeong had learned that over the course of their relationship. It was the small things, like the twitch at her left eye and the way her pupils dilated, the way her gaze would linger for a moment too long before flickering away, as though she was searching for the right way to feel. The only other thing that gave away any sort of emotion Sae-byeok was feeling was the shake or clench of her hands.
She waits for Sae-byeok to say something. Anything. Literally anything would be better than the way she was staring down at Ji-byeok with those unforgivable lips.
A minute passed and Ji-yeong nodded slowly, letting out a laugh that almost sounded like she was making fun of the taller.
“Don’t,” Sae-byeok let out a breath. “Don’t fucking laugh.”
“I’m not laughing at you. I’m laughing at how stubborn and absolutely fucking unbelievable you’re being right now.” She said, voice harsh and pushing her finger into Sae-byeok’s chest.
If anyone else spoke to Sae-byeok like this, they’d have been smashed through the window already.
But this was Ji-yeong. Ji-yeong. Her Ji-yeong.
Her Ji-yeong, who had a scowl plastered on her face and who was hurt by something Sae-byeok had done. Sure, she hadn’t exactly fully recognised what she did wrong just yet but she was trying to.
She honestly hadn’t ever seen this anger from Ji-yeong directed to her. It was usually to literally anyone else. Sae-byeok didn’t want to be looked at by Ji-yeong as if she was just anyone else.
She stayed silent far too long which caused Ji-yeong to roll her eyes and shake her head before stepping back and going toward the door again.
Sae-byeok quickly acted and closed the door when Ji-yeong opened it. Ji-yeong stared at the handle, not looking up at Sae-byeok. The taller took the shorter’s hands away from the handle and held them, making them face each other again and brushing her thumbs over her hands.
Ji-yeong still didn’t look up at her.
She didn’t have to.
“I’m sorry I didn’t take you seriously.” She said as softly as she could, hoping that her voice somehow transferred the fact that she really was sorry.
Ji-yeong looked up at her now.
“I am.” Sae-byeok repeated. She doesn’t know what else to say so she stays quiet and pulls Ji-yeong in by her hands for a full hug. She wrapped her arms around her shoulders and leaned down so she could burrow her face into her neck.
After a moment, right when Sae-byeok thinks that she hadn’t been able to fix things and Ji-yeong was just going to leave, Ji-yeong’s arms find their place around Sae-byeok’s waist.
It’s amazing just how perfectly Sae-byeok fits into Ji-yeong’s grasp and how Ji-yeong fits into hers.
The hug seems to last forever, and Sae-byeok wouldn’t mind it actually lasting that long. She never knew she loved being hugged by anyone other than her family until she had met Ji-yeong who apparently loved hugging people she had known for not even a couple hours. It was nice being able to fit into someone like a piece of a puzzle.
They pull away and Sae-byeok almost pouts. Almost. Ji-yeong seemed to notice, though, just as she always has.
“Going soft now, are we, Sae-byeokie?”
“Never.” Sae-byeok smiled down at her.
“Good,” Ji-yeong grinned up at her.
Sae-byeok wanted to take a picture and burn it into her brain. Ji-yeong looked so utterly breathtaking she was sure her heart was going to fall out of her chest. The way the moon highlighted her fading streaks of blonde and the way her hair still had some flecks of snow in them made the taller want to take a hairbrush and brush through her hair until nothing was harming it. Ji-yeong’s eyes were looking up at her, an entire world of attention and affection directed toward Sae-byeok and she swore she could die right now and stay happy.
“Now can we get into bed? It’s really late and I’ve got class in the morning. I could really use a good night's sleep.”
✦
The two were huddled underneath the covers, Ji-yeong under Sae-byeok’s arm and resting her cheek on her chest. She was almost asleep when Sae-byeok whispered something barely audible.
“Hm?” Ji-yeong mumbled into her shirt.
“What was the plan?” Sae-byeok played with her hair a little. “I mean, the romantic one.”
“I was trying to be like that guy in that movie we watched, you know, the one.”
“We watch a lot of movies.”
“The one with the boombox.”
“Oh.”
“I know. Hard to guess that’s what I was trying to replicate when all you saw was me taking a shit ton of snow into the mouth and freezing my ass off.”
Sae-byeok let out a small laugh and brought Ji-yeong closer to herself, fixing the blanket on her shoulder to keep her warm. “You feel better now though, right? Not too cold?”
“Stop fussing over me, I’m not a baby,” Ji-yeong mumbled. “But yes. Thank you.” she pushed herself further into Sae-byeok’s side and sighed.
Taking a snowball to the face was totally worth her being able to hold Ji-yeong close to her. She’d take a million snowballs if it meant spending even just a second more with the shorter.
Sae-byeok was never going to let Ji-yeong go, even when the morning eventually came.