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Eddie is so fucked. Eddie is so incredibly fucked.
Why, one might ask? Because he just is, is the answer. Eddie is hanging out at Buck’s loft, and they’re not alone. Jee is there with them, since they had offered to babysit for the day while Maddie and Chimney were at doctor’s appointments and running errands.
Or, more accurately, Buck offered to look after Jee, but forgot he and Eddie had plans, so now, here they are, babysitting together. Which, in theory, is great—Eddie loves spending time with Buck, and he absolutely adores Jee, so it’s a win-win. But that is also the problem.
Buck and Jee are so adorable together that Eddie feels like he might get a sugar rush just from looking at them. His best friend is so effortlessly good with kids, with that soft voice he uses when he talks to them, or the way he gently holds Jee. His curls fall perfectly around his face, and today, his birthmark seems a shade of pink even brighter than usual. All of it makes Eddie wish, just for a moment, to have Buck’s babies.
That’s the problem.
Eddie had gone through some major realizations over the past few months. Christopher being away had left a gaping hole in his life, one that he couldn’t ignore. He was determined to get his life back together, to rebuild it, so his son would want to come back. Come home.
One day, he picked up his phone, his thumb hovering over his therapist’s number. He hesitated for a moment, but then, with a deep breath, he clicked on it. It wasn’t an easy decision, and it wasn’t an easy time, but he knew it was for the best.
He was unpacking things that had been locked away in his mind for far too long, and bringing them to the surface hurt. A lot. But he was doing it—for himself, for Christopher, and for their future. Working on himself and maintaining a long-distance relationship with his son was challenging at first, but now, things were better. Still not great, but at least better . Plans to see each other were already made.
There was a sense of healing in his life, even if he needed to put in some more effort.
And slowly, as Eddie’s life started to come back together, he realized something else. His feelings for Buck had always been there , and he couldn’t deny it any longer. Or not anymore. He just didn’t realise what type of feelings they were.
Eddie had come to terms with the fact that he was gay. It wasn’t a sudden revelation; it had been there all along, quietly waiting for him to see it. When he finally said ‘I’m gay ’ out loud in front of a mirror, a sense of peace washed over him. He had always felt like something was wrong, but coming to the conclusion that— no, he wasn’t broken, that he didn’t need fixing—was liberating. He simply needed to understand who he truly was, and that it was okay. And now, he was learning how to live with that truth.
That’s the juice I’ve been denying myself.
So, this is why he’s fucked .
Right now, Buck and Jee are in the kitchen, making a cake together. There’s flour on their faces, smudged across their cheeks, and when they laugh, Eddie swears it’s the best sound in the world.
“Now we take this funny looking spoon,” Buck takes Jee’s hand, guiding it to the whisk. “So we can mix our cake mayonnaise!”
Eddie can’t help but smile at how Buck always uses Jee’s playful misnaming of things. He asked her what those things looked like, and she came up with the funniest names.
“Mix!” Jee repeats with so much joy, one would think mixing is the best thing in the world.
They’re the best thing in the world.
Buck’s hands are a little clumsy—on purpose—as he mixes the batter, just so he makes Jee giggle harder, her small fingers trying to help stir. Their smiles are so wide, so genuine, that Eddie feels his heart squeeze, as if it’s been wrapped in warm, fluffy cake batter itself. He leans back, resting his chin in his palm, utterly transfixed by the sight of them.
I want to have his babies. I need to give him babies.
Oh, God. What?
“What? You don’t like it?” Buck’s hand is firm but soft on Jee’s, as they mixed together. There is a beautiful frown decorating his face, and Eddie wants to kiss it away.
“Huh?” It’s the only response Eddie is capable of giving, voice barely a whisper, tender, while a smile is appearing on his face—he didn’t quite understand what his friend was talking about, Eddie was too busy admiring the way Buck was moving, or how he was looking at him. He’s just so beautiful.
“You look funny, Eddie.” Jee’s voice graces his ears, and Eddie’s gaze shifts to her. He notices how she’s leaning against Buck’s chest—so small in comparison to him. There’s something incredibly endearing about it. Watching such a big, strong man be so delicate and gentle with the tiny, wild little human in his arms is overwhelming in the best way.
He’s so good with kids.
And suddenly, a thought hits his mind.
I bet he’d be good with our kids, too. If only I could have them—
A little laugh escapes his mouth. He does not only blush, he also feels ridiculous.
Eddie is over 30, only recently realizing he’s gay—and, apparently, crazy in love with his best friend. He’s still working on mending his relationship with his son, who’s currently in another state, too far away from him. And now—now , of all times—he’s watching his best friend and his niece being tremendously and annoyingly cute, wishing, for the first time in his life, that he could get pregnant. So he could give the most precious, wonderful, beautiful man on earth a baby.
God, what the hell is wrong with me?
“Hello? Earth to Eddie?” Buck waves his hands in front of Eddie’s face, trying to get his attention.
Jee’s laughter fills the room, she looks up at Buck like he’s his favourite toy, and Eddie is sure he would look back at her like she’s the most special person in the world. He knows that because Buck gives Eddie the same look. Even now, with confusion written all over his face, he feels the warmth in Buck’s eyes, the fondness that’s always there.
“Earth to Eddie?” Jee repeats, her voice playful. She leans across the counter, gently poking Eddie’s nose before squeezing it hard.
“Ouch!” He exaggerates the way he flinches, just to make her giggle.
“Uncle Buck! I fixed Eddie!” Her voice is sparkling with mischief.
“Haha! I don’t think he can be fixed, let’s see, do you still think Attack of the Clones is one of the best movies of the saga?”
“It is, you just don’t get it.” Eddie protests, fondly shaking his head.
“Sorry Jee, I don’t think you fixed him.” Buck says, his voice light and teasing, but with that underlying softness Eddie loves.
Jee’s hands fly up to her mouth in mock surprise, her eyes wide with amusement.
Buck chuckles, continuing to speak to her in that playful, affectionate tone. Eddie can’t help but smile at the sight.
So cute.
“Are you just gonna stand there and look pretty or are you gonna help us, Eddie?”
Eddie rolls his eyes as he moves around the counter, glancing down at the dirty bowls before taking them to the sink to rinse. He purposely avoids meeting Buck’s gaze, hoping he wouldn’t notice the rosy color painting his cheeks.
“I thought you didn’t want me near your kitchen,” Eddie says, his focus on the cold water running over his hands, his tone soft but teasing.
“That was years ago,” Buck responds, grinning as he carefully lowers Jee back onto her stool. He steps up behind Eddie, his playful smile tugging at his lips. “You’re a great cook now! You just brought that up because you want me and Jee to do all the work. Tell the truth.”
“Maybe I do,” Eddie shrugs, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. “So, what about it?” He suddenly splashes water in Buck’s face, laughing as Buck sputters in surprise.
Buck wipes his face and makes a face of mock offense. “You’re such a diva.”
Eddie raises an eyebrow, playing tough, but the small grin spreading across his lips betrays his act. “Excuse me?”
Buck steps even closer, now mere inches away from Eddie. “I said,” His hands suddenly dart to Eddie’s waist, so he starts tickling him. “You’re such a diva, Eddie.”
Eddie bursts into uncontrollable laughter, loud and genuine, and Buck can’t help but laugh too. The sound of their laughter, so carefree, fills the room. They continue the tickle war, both of them laughing so hard that it feels like the world could disappear around them and they wouldn’t care. The simple joy of being together—so effortless, so pure—grows between them with every giggle.
“Jee, come help me!” Buck calls, his voice barely audible through his laughter. Jee races to them, a grin on her face as she starts to pat Eddie’s leg, giggling herself.
“Tickles!” she says gleefully, her eyes sparkling with excitement.
“Tickles!” Eddie echoes, though he’s quickly distracted by Buck picking her up and holding her close.
Buck continues the tickle assault on her, his hands gently squeezing her cheeks and running up and down her stomach to make her laugh harder. Her giggles are so pure, so innocent, that Eddie can’t help but smile at the sight—at how happy they all are. He watches as Jee tries to tickle Buck in return, poking at his chest while Buck continues to laugh, his voice warm with affection.
The moment is so simple, so beautiful.
I love you.
I love you and I want a family with you.
Eddie’s heart swells as his mind begins to drift, thoughts flashing through him like snapshots of memories. He recalls all the nights spent with Buck and Christopher—movie nights, board games, sleepovers, all of it. A family .
We already have a family together.
The realization hits him, warm and sure. What they’ve built over time, the love they share growing stronger with each passing day. And for a brief moment, he lets himself picture a future where it all continues: a house with a fence, Christopher talking about colleges, Buck helping him research options, Eddie with a ring shining on his finger. And a tiny voice, calling for “Dad.”
He’s pulled back to the present by Buck’s voice, louder now.
“What do you say we team up against Eddie?” Buck asks, his grin wicked and wide.
“Yes! Let’s tickle Eddie!” Jee squeals, her little hands clapping excitedly.
Eddie looks between them, a smile creeping onto his face. Yeah, that’s the man I want to spend my life with.
Buck looks down at his niece, a soft smile gracing his face as he whispers the countdown. They both turn to look at Eddie as they begin their playful assault. Jee laughs in Eddie’s face, trying to poke his neck, while Buck holds her tightly between them. With his other hand, he tickles Eddie’s waist.
The sound of Jee’s laughter fills the air, and Eddie looks up at Buck, his blue eyes twinkling with a special glint. He can’t help but laugh—genuinely, from the heart. It’s a laugh full of happiness.
Beautiful.
And maybe happiness isn’t so bad after all.
Maybe Eddie can allow himself to have something. Maybe the future holds something good for him. Maybe he doesn’t have to punish himself any longer, and maybe it’s okay. Maybe, like a soul being freed from its penance, he can let go of his guilt and embrace the possibility of joy. He doesn’t have to fear that it will be taken away from him, because, maybe—just maybe—he can allow himself the purest form of joy: a life spent with his best friend and the family they’ve built together.
Life feels beautiful right now. It will be even more beautiful, one day with their house, their jobs, their son, and their new children.
“Okay, okay, that’s enough,” Jee declares, her voice a bit dramatic but her tone is still cheerful as she gestures at Buck to let her down. She adjusts her hair and looks up at them, while pointing to the kitchen table. “I’m hungry. Can we eat something?”
Buck raises an eyebrow, clearly amused at the sudden change of topic. Eddie thinks it’s funny how a little human can be so bossy. Just like her uncle.
“Oh, now you’re the boss of us?” he teases, his hand still hovering in the air as if he’s ready to continue the tickle war.
Jee nods firmly, crossing her arms. “Yes!” she states, then runs off toward the table. Buck watches her for a moment, chuckling, before turning back to Eddie.
Eddie notices how Buck’s eyes light up whenever he’s with Jee—or with kids in general. It’s a look that softens Buck’s entire face, leaving him with the most tender smile. Eddie can’t help but adore that smile, the kind that seems to hold everything warm and good in the world.
Buck makes Eddie feel warm and good.
That smile almost made Eddie—for the hundredth time today—imagine something more, something deeper. It’s so beautiful, so perfect, that Eddie found himself thinking about the possibility of a little one with that same smile, those same blue eyes, and wild curls. For a moment, he even lets himself wish he could give Buck a child. And he curses himself for not being able to. But if he could, he would in a heartbeat.
God must be mocking me from up there.
“I guess I’d better start making dinner soon,” Buck says, glancing over his shoulder as he heads back toward the counter.
As he moves past Jee, he crouches down to her level. “What do you want for a snack, kiddo? We’re almost done with the cake, so you’ve gotta pick something to hold you over.”
Jee looks up at him, her face scrunched in thought. “Umm, grapes, please! And some cheese!”
Buck grins and ruffles her hair. “Grapes and cheese it is.” He stands up and starts pulling things from the fridge, talking to Jee like she’s the most important person in the room. There’s something effortlessly warm in his tone, like he’s truly listening to her, even in the simplest moments.
Eddie watches them, admiring the way Buck interacts with her. There’s so much patience, so much care in his voice. It’s like he has all the time in the world just to make sure Jee feels heard, even when it’s about something as small as choosing a snack. Eddie thinks he does that because that’s how he wanted to be treated as a child. He notices the way Buck takes pictures of her, always careful to keep a special album on his phone. He has one for Christopher, too. Eddie remembers when Buck once told him that it was like a “baby box” and that “everyone deserves one so they feel special.”
Eddie wonders how many albums Buck would make for their family. Albums filled with pictures of him, Buck, Christopher, and their future kids, all carefully kept in his phone, divided by trips, events, or activities.
He really is great with kids. I want to see him with our kids.
Eddie smiles to himself, touched by the quiet tenderness Buck has with her. It’s one of the many things that makes Buck… well, Buck.
Why does he have to be so beautiful? Why is it that everything Buck does makes Eddie find it so endearing, so undeniably attractive? Why does he feel this explosion within himself every time he looks at his best friend, like the universe itself is shifting—worlds colliding or, better yet, aligning?
Every time Buck locks eyes with him, Eddie’s world fills with color, sharp and overwhelming, like everything he’s ever known falls into place, even though it feels like a sin to want it so badly. It’s like Buck is a prayer Eddie whispers to himself, even though he’s been taught to fear that very kind of longing.
And yet, in those moments, Eddie can’t escape it. Buck is everything Eddie’s been taught to resist and yet everything he can’t help but believe in—like a blessing he can’t absolve himself of, even though he knows it might never be enough to atone for the guilt that tightens in his chest. He’s drawn to him the way a sinner is drawn to the light, even if it’s blinding.
Eddie is too far gone for his best friend, his heart isn’t capable of not loving Buck’s soul for how amazingly beautiful he is. With people, with kids, with words, with actions, with his blue eyes, with his curls running wild, with his teasing voice, his caring tone—just with everything .
I love you, Buck. So much.
So much, I want to have your kids, as many as you want. I’d be pregnant and walk around carrying your babies and I’d be the happiest person on this planet.
It can’t be so wrong to love someone so purely, so deeply, right?
Eddie can’t help his mind, as it frees itself of any wall that was built over the years, holding it back.
God, I sound so stupid. But I don’t care.
As Jee finishes her snack, Buck and Eddie work to finish the cake. They occasionally bump shoulders, and their hands touch for a few seconds while passing ingredients, Eddie could feel the electricity coming from it. Giving him life. And he finds the little blush that would appear on Buck’s cheek adorable , as if he didn’t have a matching one on his own face.
“What movie do you want to watch later?” Buck hums as he wipes down the counter, his movements slow and relaxed. The atmosphere is calm, the kind of peace that feels like everything’s in its right place.
Jee, sitting in her chair, looks up with excitement. “How about Rapunzel?” she suggests, her grin wide.
Eddie raises an eyebrow, a smirk tugging at his lips. “A princess movie?” he says, half-amused. “Really?”
Buck, always up for a bit of fun, grins. “You’re my favorite princess, Jee. We should definitely watch that.”
Her smile grows even bigger, her eyes sparkling with joy. “Can you be my prince, Uncle Buck?”
Buck softly pokes her cheeks. “Of course! I’ll be your prince.”
Jee’s eyes light up. “Yes! Is Uncle Eddie my prince too?”
Buck glances at Eddie with a teasing grin. “I think Eddie would make another beautiful princess.”
Eddie laughs, shaking his head. “Well, actually, I’d make an amazing princess. Just not as amazing as Jee.” He strokes her nose, making her giggle.
But Eddie can feel Buck’s gaze, warm and intense, burning into him.
He clears his throat, trying to shift the attention. “Weren’t you supposed to be making dinner?”
Buck tilts his head, his tone playful. “Aren’t you going to help?”
Eddie leans against the counter, crossing his arms. “Nope. I’m going to play with Jee. We expect royal treatment, of course.”
Buck winks at him. “Anything for my princesses.”
He walks toward the fridge, gathering ingredients as he begins making dinner. Jee, her arms open wide, eagerly waits for Eddie to pick her up. She wants to play, either on the couch or on the floor near it, where all her toys are scattered around.
Spending time with Jee really puts things into a new perspective for Eddie. She’s so full of energy, positivity, purity, and joy—it makes him excited for the future, for the thought of one day sharing that with his and Buck’s daughter. Buying her cute outfits, playing with her favorite toys, watching the bond between her and Christopher grow.
As Eddie plays with Jee, enchanted by her smile and infectious cheer, he glances over at Buck, who’s busy in the kitchen. He notices how Buck will occasionally stop, his gaze soft as he watches them from a distance. The expression on his face is hard to read, but it’s clear—it’s full of adoration. Sometimes, their eyes meet, and in those brief moments, something deep inside Eddie shifts, something that heals him a little more.
How is he so lucky? To have someone like Buck in his life? To be surrounded by two of the most adorable people in the world?
He wishes Christopher were here, and then everything would be perfect. But maybe, just maybe, one day it will be. One day, it’ll be Eddie, Buck, Christopher, and their daughter, playing together on the floor of their new house. That thought—that feeling—feels like home .
“Dinner is ready!” Buck’s voice snaps Eddie out of his trance.
Eddie blinks, momentarily disoriented, and then smiles as he sees Buck standing in the kitchen, holding two plates of food, a playful grin on his face. Jee, already at the table, is bouncing in her seat, eagerly awaiting the meal. Eddie chuckles and walks over to pick her up, settling her down at the table.
The three of them sit together, enjoying a simple but delicious dinner. They laugh, talk, and share stories, the atmosphere light and full of warmth. Jee is animated, chattering about her new toys, her new friends, making them both laugh with her wild little observations. Buck is just as engaged, his eyes bright with affection as he listens to her. And Eddie? He can’t stop looking at Buck. Every time their eyes meet, his chest tightens in that familiar, aching way. He’s so in love with him, and it hits him all over again, each time more deeply than the last.
As Buck passes him a plate, their fingers brush for a brief second, sending a spark through Eddie. He swallows hard, wishing, not for the first time, that he could have this life with Buck in the future. He imagines their daughter, a little girl with Buck’s sense of humor. He imagines all of them sitting here, at this table, the four of them—him, Buck, Christopher, and their daughter. The thought fills him with a kind of longing, a hope so deep it almost hurts.
Dinner is over, and Jee, still full of energy, bounds back to the couch, her dolls scattered across the floor as she excitedly prepares for movie night.
Eddie and Buck clear the table together, the kitchen is quiet except for the soft clink of dishes being stacked. Buck moves around, a bit distracted, wiping down the counter while muttering under his breath.
“I bought her a little gift the other day,” he says, his voice warm with affection. “A dress. It’s pink, with little sparkles on it.” He smiles to himself as he gathers the last of the plates. “I think I’ll buy her more. I’m the uncle, so who’s gonna spoil her, if not me?”
Eddie pauses for a moment, his heart swelling at the thought. The way Buck talks about Jee, the love in his voice—it’s everything. There’s something so inherently beautiful about the way he wants to shower her with little treasures. Eddie can see Buck as the kind of dad who would fill their daughter’s closet with the cutest clothes, the most playful accessories, always trying to make her smile.
“I wish I could get pregnant so you could buy our daughter all the clothes and cute things you want.”
The words slip out before he can stop them, and he immediately feels a flush rise to his cheeks. He looks at Buck, expecting some kind of teasing or laughter, but instead, he sees Buck’s gaze soften, taking in the words. For a moment, neither of them speaks.
“You—what?” Buck’s voice is barely a whisper, a beautiful frown settling on his face. His eyes shimmer with something that looks almost like hope, as if he’s afraid to break the moment, terrified he misheard.
“Oh my God. Forget I said anything,” Eddie mutters, already turning to walk away.
“No, no. Eddie, wait,” Buck’s hand is gentle but firm on his arm. “Did you—are you serious? Do you—Eddie…” Buck sighs, running a hand through his hair, trying to collect himself. Eddie can feel him fumbling for words, like he wants to believe it’s true but is afraid to ask.
Buck is speechless, his eyes full of emotion Eddie can’t quite place, but the tenderness in them speaks louder than anything else. A comforting warmth settles over Eddie as he realizes just how much Buck is trying to understand.
“Yes, I’m serious,” Eddie says, his voice soft but certain. “I mean, not serious serious, because—uhm, yeah. I mean it, though.”
There’s a nervous chuckle in Eddie’s words, but underneath it, there’s honesty, and maybe a little bit of hope, too.
“Buck! Eddie! Can we watch the movie now?”
The sound of Jee’s voice startles both of them, pulling them out of their quiet moment. They turn toward her, she’s now standing near the table, smiles immediately spreading across their faces.
“Of course, sweetheart! We’ll be there in just a few minutes,” Buck calls out with a playful grin, his tone warm and inviting. Eddie nods in agreement, his smile reflecting the same joy.
As Buck turns back to Eddie, his hand gently cups Eddie’s face. The gentle touch of his thumb brushes over the mole beneath Eddie’s eye, the heat of his fingers sending a shiver through him.
“We’ll talk about this later, okay?” Buck murmurs, his voice low, soft, and full of something unspoken. The promise in his words feels like a quiet assurance—a reassurance that whatever this is between them, whatever Eddie just said, isn’t something to be rushed or figured out in a moment of chaos.
Eddie meets Buck’s eyes, a smile tugging at his lips. “Okay.”
The warmth in Buck’s gaze settles over him like a comforting blanket, and for a moment, all the uncertainty fades. They’re not rushing anything—they’re here, together, and they’ll figure it out when the time is right. But for now, there’s only the promise of a movie night, and a feeling that, in this moment, everything is exactly as it should be.
They settle on the couch, with Jee nestled comfortably between them. The movie begins, but Jee, already drowsy, rests her head on Buck’s chest. He smiles softly, gently wrapping his arm around her, adjusting her to make sure she’s comfortable. Eddie watches, his heart swelling at the sight of Buck’s tenderness, the easy way he falls into these moments—caring, protective, always so gentle.
As Buck settles back into the couch, he looks up at Eddie. Their eyes meet, and for a heartbeat, the world seems to stop. Eddie’s breath falters, as he realizes just how much he feels for this man sitting beside him. Buck is so beautiful—so effortlessly kind and strong, and in this moment, with his arm around Jee, he’s everything Eddie has ever wanted and more. It feels like a tidal wave of love, crashing through him so suddenly that it almost takes his breath away.
The deep, intense urge to have Buck’s babies is only growing stronger.
Why does he have to be so annoyingly, disgustingly adorable?
Eddie curses his brain as his thoughts run wild for the hundredth time, as if his mind has it out for him. Or maybe it’s just because everything he feels is so true, so real, that he can’t deny it anymore. But for some reason, the sight in front of him feels like a blessing.
He’s always had his struggles with God and religion, but if he had to choose something to believe in—something to put his trust in, something that felt divine—it would be this. Him. Buck.
Buck’s gaze softens, a knowing smile tugging at the corner of his lips. Eddie feels his cheeks flush, realizing Buck probably knows exactly what he’s thinking. He doesn’t look away, though. He lets Buck see it—how much he’s loved, how much he wants him. How much Eddie adores him with everything in his soul. He’s not sure he’ll ever find the right words to express just how deep or intense his feelings are for his best friend, so Eddie simply hopes that his eyes are louder than his voice could ever be.
Buck doesn’t look away either, his gaze just as intense. It’s almost like he’s trying to say something too, like he’s pouring his heart out with one simple glance.
I love you.
I love you too.
A sudden noise from the TV jolts them back to reality. Buck quickly shifts his attention back to Jee, brushing her hair gently.
Eddie just smiles, feeling a warmth settle over him. There’s a sense of being welcome, of being home—a love that hugs them both with the gentlest touch. It makes them feel drowsy, on the verge of falling asleep.
The movie continues, and they both close their eyes, their heads naturally leaning against each other. The pull between them is involuntary, but it feels right, as if the universe itself is pulling them closer.
They stay like that, on the couch, for an indefinite amount of time, the end credits rolling across the screen. It’s only when a loud knock at the door jolts them back to consciousness that they finally break the peaceful moment.
Chimney and Maddie arrived to pick up Jee, their voices light and full of affection as they gather her things. Jee, still half asleep, mumbles a few words of protest, but her excitement to see her parents soon takes over. She hugs Buck tightly, then Eddie, giving them both a sleepy kiss on the cheek before running to her parents.
“We’ll see you soon, right?” Maddie asks with a soft smile, her eyes warm as she meets Eddie’s gaze.
“Definitely,” Eddie replies, his smile genuine, though a little wistful.
Once the door closes behind Chim and Maddie, it’s just Buck and Eddie left in the quiet of the house. The silence settles between them, but it’s not uncomfortable. It feels natural—just the two of them, like it always has.
Buck takes a deep breath, breaking the quiet. “So, we need to talk.”
Eddie nods, his stomach flipping slightly. “Yeah.”
Buck hesitates, his voice soft but a little unsteady. “About what you said earlier… about, uh, having my kids…” He pauses, rubbing the back of his neck, clearly nervous. “I liked it. I mean… I want that too. You, having my kids.”
His words tumble out in a rush, and he immediately makes a face, realizing how awkward he sounds. “Oh my God, I’m sorry,” he mutters, mentally cursing himself.
Eddie laughs—sincere and warm, the sound echoing in the quiet room. There’s love in his eyes as he looks at Buck, and for a moment, it’s like the whole world fades away.
“Are you making fun of me?” Buck asks, his brow furrowing slightly, but there’s a playful edge to his voice.
Eddie shakes his head, still chuckling. “I’m sorry, it’s just… it’s funny. I’m the one who said I wanted to be pregnant with your babies, and here you are, fumbling over your words.” He grins, teasing but filled with affection.
Buck looks at him, a sheepish grin pulling at his lips. “Well, I didn’t expect to be having this conversation, okay?” he says, voice a little rough with the unspoken vulnerability between them. “But what I mean is it’s true. I want that, I want you, Eddie.”
The tension that had settled between them eases, and Eddie’s heart warms. This feels right—like they’re finally saying the things that have been waiting in the quiet spaces between them for so long.
“I want that too, Buck,” Eddie says softly, his voice thick with emotion. “What I want… is a family with you.”
Buck’s gaze softens, but Eddie continues, his words coming faster now, as if the weight of everything he’s been holding in can’t wait any longer. “Actually, we already have a family, Buck. I just want it to be forever. I’m sorry, I feel so stupid that the way I’m confessing my love to you started because I couldn’t help myself when I saw you with Jee. I don’t even know what took over me.”
Buck lets out a quiet laugh, the sound light and teasing. “Cuteness aggression. That’s what it’s called.”
Eddie’s face scrunches in disbelief, a smile tugging at his lips despite the overwhelming mix of emotions coursing through him. He can’t believe he’s in love with this idiot— his idiot.
“That…” Eddie starts, his voice cracking slightly, “but seriously, I do wish I could give you a daughter. Or as many kids as you want, Buck. You’re already such a great father to Chris, and a great partner in every way to me. I should’ve put more thought into how I said all of this, but the truth is… I love you. Unconditionally. My heart can’t help but love you.”
He takes a deep breath, his eyes locked on Buck’s, as if trying to convey every feeling inside him without words. “It’s in everything we’ve built, in everything you do for me, in everything I do… everywhere I look. The love I feel for you follows me everywhere. A part of me has always known, but I wasn’t ready. I was scared.”
Eddie’s chest tightens, his voice quieter now but stronger with every word. “But now? Nothing scares me more than spending another minute without telling you how much you mean to me. I want you to know. I want you to see it. I wish I could prove it to you by carrying your child. Believe me, I love you,” Eddie steps closer. “I love you.”
For a long moment, they just look at each other, the world outside falling away. It’s just them now—no more doubts, no more hiding. Only the raw honesty of their feelings, in every glance, in every breath.
Buck stands there, his heart pounding in his chest, at a loss for words. The weight of Eddie’s confession settles over him, too much to process all at once. He opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out—nothing feels big enough or real enough to capture the enormity of what Eddie just shared. For a moment, he’s frozen, caught in the intense gravity of the moment.
Then, without thinking, he steps forward, closing the space between them. His hand reaches up, cupping Eddie’s face, his thumb grazing the stubble on his jaw. He doesn’t need words. He knows what he feels, and in that moment, it’s all-consuming. Leaning in, he kisses Eddie—softly at first, as if testing the waters, then deeper, more sure, as the world around them fades. It’s everything Eddie’s been waiting for, everything he’s dreamed of, and more. A kiss that speaks volumes—of love, of understanding, of everything they’ve shared and everything they’ve yet to explore.
Their lips part, and they rest their foreheads together, savoring each other’s presence. The sound of their hearts beating in sync is the loudest thing in the room, the only noise that matters.
Buck takes Eddie’s hands in his, looking at him with an intensity that seems to reach deep into Eddie’s soul, like he’s trying to communicate everything he feels without saying a word.
“Eddie,” Buck says, his voice thick with emotion. “I love you. I love you so much. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way about anyone. You drive me crazy—I’m absolutely insane in love with you. I think I walk around with it written on my forehead.” He laughs softly, shaking his head, but the seriousness in his eyes doesn’t fade. “You and Chris, you’re the best things that have ever happened to me. You are my family. You’ll always be my boys. I’ve always dreamed of this… of us. A home. A family. And I want our future together, Eddie. There’s nothing I want more than that.”
Tears start to fall down both of their faces as the weight of his words settles between them.
“I promise you,” Buck continues, his voice trembling, “I will love you forever. Because that’s all I know how to do. I’m not capable of living without loving you.” Eddie reaches up, wiping a tear from Buck’s cheek, his heart swelling with everything Buck is saying.
“And trust me,” Buck adds, trying to lighten the moment, “I wish I could get you pregnant. There’s nothing I would want more than to make you feel how much I love you back.”
Eddie laughs, the sound filling the room, feeling his heart ease with the warmth of Buck’s words. “God, I adore you,” he says, his voice full of affection.
Buck grins, his eyes twinkling. Eddie leans in to kiss him softly, a gentle promise in the touch.
“Well, too bad I can’t get pregnant,” Eddie murmurs against his lips.
Buck chuckles, his hands pulling Eddie closer. “I’m sure I can find a way to make that happen.”
Eddie laughs, his voice playful. “What? You’re gonna defy biology?”
Buck smirks, his tone teasing. “Yes, I will defy biology and get you pregnant.”
“Ah, I’m honored,” Eddie says, grinning wide, “I love you.”
Buck kisses him again, deeper this time, as if sealing the promise between them. “I love you too.”