Chapter Text
Hunter wasn’t sure what was wrong with him. He’s honestly never noticed anything wrong with him before, he thought he was normal. Well, as normal as the future golden guard could be. But now he’s meeting other people, other people his age, and he’s starting to realize he isn’t as normal as he thought he was.
He’s been living with Luz’s mother, Ms. Noceda, for a few weeks now. Ms. Noceda still insists they call her Camila, which Hunter is trying to do, but it’s hard, especially when he knows she’s a higher rank than him, even if she doesn’t act like it. Even if nobody else seems to respect that.
But regardless, Hunter keeps going into panic mode, and then forgets what happened in panic mode. He honestly didn’t notice he was forgetting it at first, until someone asked him why he was panicking earlier, when he doesn’t remember panicking at all.
Apparently, he’s been panicking fairly often too.
But that’s not it either. Sometimes he’ll say things he didn’t want to say, and not be able to take it back. Sometimes he’ll get startled and react without wanting to. And, he’s starting to realize that there’s a lot more time in the day than he thought there was. He thought at first that that was because the human world had a different time cycle, but when he brought it up with Luz, she had just looked confused, and asked what he was talking about.
He keeps having weird thoughts too, not that that’s unusual, but they’re not fitting the situation anymore. Like, before he would have weird random thoughts, but they’d be helpful and remind him of work he needed to do, or tell him how to act so he didn’t get hurt. Now they’re just telling him random things, things that don’t make sense either. Like telling him not to do things, or talk about things, or think about things.
Like right now.
The thoughts keep telling him that he’s worrying over nothing, and that it’s not in his place to think about this. Which. It’s HIS brain, why can’t he think about it? Because it’s not something he should know. Why, though?
Just stop thinking about it.
… Hunter has never been very good at not thinking about stuff. Which is not good, and he needs to stop. It’s not ok. But like, that’s what led him to figure out that Belos was bad and– no, Uncle was not bad. He was doing what he– what the hell. This is what he means. Why do his thoughts keep betraying him? Betraying his friends? They’re not his friends. Yes they are.
No they are not. Hunter is not going to argue with himself, that’s stupid. Yes it is.
Hunter sighs loudly.
“You good Hunter?”
Hunter startles at the voice and whips around to face Gus. “I- yeah, why do you ask?”
“You've been staring at that corner for ten minutes, and it’s getting concerning.”
“Oh, sorry I didn’t realize.”
“No need to apologize, I’m just worried about you.” Gus stares at Hunter for a few more seconds, before looking away. Hunter isn’t sure how to interpret that, so he leaves the room.
——————
Hunter wakes up. Or maybe he was already awake but just didn’t know it. He’s lying in his sleeping bag. He’s in the basement of Ms Nocedas house. He’s fine. He doesn’t know why he’s freaking out again. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop-
Someone shakes his shoulder.
——————
Hunter wakes up again. Right. Gus is worried about him. He shouldn’t be, no one should care about Hunte- shut up.
He’s not-
“Hey Hunter, are you awake?”
Hunter takes a breath and sits up. “Yeah.” His voice cracks. Has he been crying?
Gus and Willow are sitting by his sleeping bag. It's dark. Probably because it’s the middle of the night. He doesn’t know how he knows it’s the middle of the night, they’re in the basement.
Willow and Gus look at each other with a concerned look, and seem to reach a silent agreement. Gus stands up and goes upstairs.
“So…” Willow starts. “How are you feeling?”
“I’m good.” Hunter responds instinctively. He cringes slightly at his own tone, he sounds annoyed. He’s not annoyed. Well he is. Who? Willow seems to tense more. Crap. He messed up. “Really! I’m fine!” Great now he sounds desperate.
“Hunter…” Willow says softly.
At that moment, Gus returns downstairs with- Oh no. That’s Ms. Noceda. Why did Gus bring Ms. Noceda here? Hunter must have done something bad. Oh Titan.
Ms. Noceda doesn’t seem too upset, but Hunter knows that could be her waiting until the other kids, the good kids, leave.
“Ay- Hunter, you are awake.” Ms. Noceda says while smiling with a strained voice.
“Yes.” Hunter says while looking down.
Ms. Noceda sits down in front of him. She sighs. “Hunter, I know you don’t want to talk about this, but I think we need to talk.”
Oh no. He must have really messed up.
“Hunter, you didn’t do anything wrong, if that’s what you’re thinking.” Ms. Noceda looks over at Willow and Gus. “Do you want Willow and Gus to stay for this?”
Hunter pauses, before shaking his head. He doesn’t want them to be hurt for something he did. Willow and Gus look a little sad, but leave the room.
“So. Can you tell me what led to that?”
Hunter looks down in panic. He doesn’t know what she’s talking about, but he must have done something and just forgotten about it. “I uh, I don’t know, I- what uh, what did I do?”
Ms. Noceda looks confused for a second, before asking, “Do you not remember?”
Hunter racks his brain. “No, I’m sorry, I know I should but-”
“Hunter, it’s okay. Would you like me to remind you?”
Hunter nods.
“About three hours ago, Gus said he woke up to you hyperventilating, so he tried to shake you awake, but that… startled you, apparently, because you started screaming, which led the rest of us to come down. I was the last to arrive, and once I arrived, you stopped screaming immediately, stood up, and started apologizing. I tried to reach out and comfort you, but you flinched away, and started crying. You fell back asleep soon after that.”
Hunter flinches at hearing that he was screaming, especially during the night. It’s not his fault. Yes it is. He shouldn’t have done that. No he shouldn’t have.
“I’m sorry.” Hunter says sincerely.
Ms. Noceda seems even more upset at this though. “Hunter, it’s not your fault,” See, he knew it wasn’t his fault. “We’re worried about you. I’m worried about you. I don’t know what your situation was before you came here, but I think you should talk about it with someone.”
“Talk to someone?” Hunter questions.
“Well, I mean, we can’t set you up with a therapist, but you should talk to your friends, or me.”
Hunter pauses. “I think there’s something wrong with me.”