Work Text:
It was just another work session for N25.Mafuyu had clocked out early. It was a weekday, after all. Kanade was silent, either lost in composition or having fallen asleep in the process. Either way, the only ones left in the call who could actually communicate were Mizuki and Ena.
Still, neither spoke. Not because there was nothing to say, but because they were focused.
The editor was busy picturing effects for the MV, carefully considering which would suit the song’s atmosphere best. The artist was steadily drawing assets, her pen strokes bringing the visuals to life.
Then, a voice cut through the silence like a brushstroke across an empty canvas. "Amia, what do you want to do in the future?"
The question hit Mizuki like a "could not compile video" screen for a project they had not saved. Their mouse froze mid-motion, and their thoughts came to a halt. The MV scene they'd been visualising flickered away.
"...Huh?" Mizuki blinked. "What do you mean by that? Like what kind of job I want to work as?"
Ena replied, "Well, yeah, something like that."
The Future... A complicated topic.
Ever since they had joined N25, Mizuki had a feeling that this couldn't last forever. The things and people that made Mizuki happy would end eventually.
It was like a birthday cake. No matter how sweet it tasted, no matter how beloved Mizuki felt when those around them sang celebrations, the candle was meant to be blown out, and only darkness would remain.
If that was going to be the case, Mizuki figured that they might as well enjoy the party while it lasted. So they remained living in the moment, not looking forwards. They let themselves be fleeting and ephemeral. They let themselves be fleeing from those who wanted to make them look ahead.
And yet, lately, they wanted to believe, that somethings could last.
Ever since Ena reached out to them, Mizuki found themselves less pessimistic than before. They could go to school more often without being tired of the gaze of others. They could accept the kindness of others without getting hurt much better now.
But the creeping anxiety over what lies ahead never quite disappeared.
And considering the person who asked the question, who was always clear about her future, of enrolling into an art school and become an artist, who was working so hard to make her dream a reality.
Even though they were so close. Even though they knew neither wanted to be apart from each other, Mizuki couldn't help but notice a infinitely wide gap between Ena and themselves. It made Mizuki feel pathetic.
"....Amia?" Mizuki flinched, suddenly aware of how long they had been silent.
"Eh... Ah, sorry I was spacing out." A short pause, then Ena spoke again.
"Well, I don't think it would be an issue if you hadn't thought of anything yet," Mizuki tensed. "You can always think of what you want from now on."
How did she know? Mizuki couldn't help but wonder when they had become so transparent.
But what Ena said... It wasn't a dismissal, nor pity. It was a reminder.
A reminder that Mizuki had a "from now on" to look forward to.
Because Ena, Kanade, Mafuyu, everyone, would continue to be on their side.
It felt obvious in hindsight, but it took so long for Mizuki to accept that it was okay to think of what lies ahead.
And that acceptance made Mizuki's heart warm.
A soft sniffle escaped before Mizuki could stop it. They quickly rubbed away a stray tear before Ena could notice.
Then, with a familiar, teasing lilt, Mizuki answered Ena. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Oh, I know! I'd be happy if you would help me think of the future, Enanan~"
"Eh? I mean, I can give you some advice, but this is your future you're supposed to think for yourself you know?" Ena groaned, but Mizuki could hear the smile in her voice from beyond the screen.
"I know that~" Mizuki grinned, leaning back in their chair.
As Mizuki noticed that Ena had become much more soft on Mizuki, they pushed the thought away as they focused on their future.
The first thing that came to mind was being a fashion designer, just like their sister, Yuuki. It wasn't hard to understand that it would be a rather thorny road ahead, considering Yuuki had complained to Mizuki when she was in University of how hard her studies were, but then again, the look on Yuuki's face when they video-called, and the look on her face when Mizuki had told her how much they love wearing clothers Yuuki made for her, she looked so happy.
And Mizuki thought it would be fun to create the "Cuteness" they had in mnd, and it would certainly be rewarding to do what they loved as a job.
After placing Fashion Design on a priority list, Mizuki thought of other things they could try. The more options they had, the merrier. Mizuki could use their part-time work experience to pursue a career in customer service, or try their hands on video production with the experience they had from N25.
A regular office job, however, was out of the question. While it wasn't that Mizuki thought they'd be bad at it in terms of performing what's required, in fact, they were slightly confident in handling menial tasks. but it was menial at its core. Mizuki couldn't see themselves commuting to work each time for that, considering that they only meet the bare minimum for school attendance.
With all the cards having been laid out, Mizuki formulated an answer.
"I've given it a thought, and maybe a Fashion Designer might work out for me. What do you think? Enanan?"
Ena hummed, considering it.
"I think it suits you. It feels like something you'd do. Yeah, I can easily imagine you being one in the future."
Suits you. Did she know how much those words mean for me?
It was such a simple thing, but the moment Mizuki heard Ena say that, their future was set in stone.
There's nothing better than being able to do what you love for a living. To be able to create something that felt like them. It was the best possible thing Mizuki could imagine.
Mizuki was sure Ena felt the same. And feeling the same way as Ena made their heart flutter.
Mizuki let out a small, soft, laugh, still smiling.
"Though if you become a designer, are you going to go overseas like your sister?"
Mizuki blinked at the question, tilting their head in thought. Working with Yuuki would certainly be nice. But...
"Hmm.... I wonder? I mean it's a possibility."
"..... I see." Somethng in Ena's tone shifted. The energy in her voiced dimmed. Mizuki could catch it immediately.
Come to think of it, An and Lil Bro was also going overseas more often, something about expanding their group. Mizuki couldn't help but wonder if Ena was feeling left behind a the people close to her go further and further away.
That feeling.
It's unpleasant. I would know.
Mizuki's mouth opened to give an answer, but nothing came out. How could they say anything for Ena, when they themselves didn't know what to do when facing that unpleasantness?
Mizuki thought of all the times that those they cherished drifted away from them. Rui had graduated, when MIzuki needed his presence the most. Yuuki had left them so far behind in life. If Ena had not found Mizuki, she would be in those painful memories too.
"Ena, would you feel lonely if I go abroad?" Mizuki blurted out, their mind unable to stop those words from coming out.
"I-Not really! I was just wondering if you wanted to-" Ena stutters and stammers, tripping over her words in a way that only made the answer painfully obvious.
Mizuki softened. "...I'd feel lonely if I did."
"Eh?"
Ena would feel sad, that was one thing, but Mizuki themselves couldn't help but think they'd break down from loneliness.
Being so far away from Ena, from everyone in N25. It was impossible to even consider, and MIzuki didn't want to even think about it.
Sure, it would be possible to continue talking with each other through Nightcord, even listen to their voices through voice call.
Heck, maybe Mizuki could see them in person via Sekai. But, there were some things that would undoubtedly be lost.
Going shopping together, Celebrating at a Family Restaurant for another job well done. Those small, happy parts of everyday life.
Mizuki couldn't bear losing any of it.
"I think... Yeah, I don't think I'd go abroad." Mizuki exhaled, a breath of relief they hadn't realised they were holding. "I really, really hate to think of not being able to meet you and the others."
A pause, broken by, "..... I see." Ena's tone once more shifted. It felt lighter, as if Mizuki's words eased something inside her. At least, eased her enough for Mizuki to start teasing her again.
"Yknow, but it makes me sad that you wouldn't feel lonely for me."
"Ah... I... well..." Ena once more fumbled her words, "....I got lonely just thinking about it... sorry for lying..."
Mizuki was ecstatic hearing this, so satisfied with the reaction, but they couldn't stop just yet. They had to deal the final blow.
"Aha! I knew it! Another Tsundere moment from Enanan!"
"Oh come on! Shut up!"
Mizuki couldn't help but wonder if Kanade was hearing this. What would this interaction look like to her? Exchanging embarassing words through the digital world.
Mizuki finds themselves moving the mouse cursor around aimlessly, unaware that the corners of their mouth were turning up into a smile.
In the circle drawn by the mouse cursor is an illustration of a fragile girl that Mizuki used for the music video.
Depite the pained expression, she was staring right ahead at whatever was in front of her. Teeth clenched, eyes filled with a quiet, unbreakable determination.
It reminded Mizuki of the person who had drawn it.
"So, Ena, you want to be an artist right?"
"Well... Yeah, what else do I have?"
What else do I have. That phrase again. It was a mantra Ena started repeating ever since a certain point.
Mizuki vaguely remembers it was around the time she helped out her father in his exhibition. Back then, it sounded like determination and ambition, a firm resolve to carve her own path. But over time, the way she said it began to shift.
"What else do I have."
It felt like it was not just an ambition anymore. It sounded like something deeper, something heavier. It made Mizuki uneasy, like they were listening to a rope pulled too tight, fraying at the edges.
A future with no escape route, no fallback lines, no room to breathe.
Mizui wasn't doubting if Ena could make it happen. In fact, Mizuki was 140% certain that Ena could reach her goal. She was one of the hardest workers Mizuki knew. The way she poured everything into her art, pushing forward with sheer determination, no matter how exhausted she got.
And that's what worried Mizuki. To see the flames that fuel Ena burn her up until there is nothing but ash.
Before Mizuki even realised, a new thought had formed in their mind, a desire they had to voice, even if it resulted in dismissal as none of their business.
"Hey Ena, I... I really want to support you. Um. Could I be with you whenever you feel down?"
"Eh? Wha-What do you mean by that? All of a sudden.."
"Ah.. sorry, I should've explained it better."
So Mizuki did. And Ena listened.
They told her about their worries, about how Ena never seemed to give herself a break. About how she carried the weight of her own expectations alone, about what she would do when she crumbled under that weight.
Mizuki wanted to be there, as someone who would catch her if she stumbled.
"... So that's why I want to be by your side."
Ena was quiet for a long moment. Then, softly, "Mizuki... I... You were worried about me..."
There was a waver in her voice. A hint of happiness and a tinge of embarassment was present in the fringes of her soft voice. Not that Mizuki was surprised.
If Mizuki was on the recieving end, if their friend suddenly said all that to them, they'd probably feel overwhelmed too. Then they'd start doubting if they really meant it.
But it seemed Ena wasn't like Mizuki in this regard. She believed every word of what Mizuki just said.
And Mizuki felt relief flood through them, because if Ena believed in them, then Mizuki could believe in themselves as well.
"I'm really happy hearing all this..." Ena paused. There was something in the silence. Like she was hesitating before stepping forward. "But honestly, I am a bit worried about you too."
"Huh?"
"I... Look, I would certainly feel happy for you to be by my side whenever I am in trouble, but what about you? If I involve you way too much, rely on you way too much, it would be a lot of trouble for you as well, wouldn't it?"
Mizuki couldn't answer immediately.
Would you get mad if I said, "It's too late to worry about that." or, "Have I not caused you lot of trouble as well?"
They wanted to say something. but the words got tangled up in their thoughts.
Ah, I should've known. We're in the same boat.
The truth was, they were both already tangled so deeply into each other's lives. Strangers and Acquaintances had long since faded into something deeper.
If it weren't for you, I would've disappeared.
Ena would deny that, of course she would. But Mizuki knew that they'd already leaned on her so much. Made her worry, given her trouble.
If being by her side was a way to repay that kindness, then... No.
That wasn't it. It wasn't about repaying anything. It was about something more than that.
"Well..." Mizuki finally said, voice lighter. "I don't think that'd be too much of an issue."
"But..."
"I... It's kinda embarassing to say it out loud but... I want to support you, because I feel like I'm alive for you."
"Wh-Why are we going that deep?"
"Well... I guess it's because you're that important to me."
I'm not an expert at art. So I can't be of much help there.
Mafuyu knows more than I do, and she's very talented, maybe she can give you better advice.
But that's not what you want, is it?
Mizuki wanted to do anything they could to help Ena. Whether it was waking her up in the morning, Being a punching bag when she got frustrated, Carrying her bags when she was going shopping, Handing her a handkerchief to wipe away her tears.
Whatever it is. If it could help you, I want to do it.
"That's... that sounds like a proposal..."
"Pr- I- Uhhh-" Mizuki short-circuted.
Ena giggled. "I get it, Mizuki. I really do." She paused, as if thinking. "Well, we're still thinking about the future, so it's too early to draw any conclucions but..."
Even through the screen, MIzuki could tell she was smiling. The kind of smile that made everything feel okay.
"I'll definitely put that into consideration." The way Ena said it made it sound more akin to "I'm looking forward to it."
"...Yeah, Thanks, Ena."
"H-Hey! Why are you thanking me?!"
Just like you never gave up on me, I don't want to give up on you.
To be able to laugh with you like this for eternity, that is my simple, selfish wish.