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I don't own anything. I wish I did but I don't. I hope you all enjoy. The song is In the Lonely Hour by Sam Smith. And the characters are from Star Trek. Which I hope you all know if you are reading this. ;)
I huffed as I flopped face down onto Bones’ bed. I had finished all the homework I felt was relevant to me, which wasn’t much of it, and was currently waiting for Bones to finish up at Medical and come back to his dorm room. I was planning on dragging him to a bar with me or hanging out at his dorm. This past week I hadn’t been able to spend any time with Bones. We had both been so busy with classes and work that we didn’t have a moment to hand out.
I flipped over and stared at the ceiling for a moment, debating what to do while I waited. Bones’ padd went off at that moment, causing me to jump a little before I sat up and looked over to where his padd was sitting. I glanced around guiltily before shrugging and grabbing it. He had received a new message, an invite of some sort to a bar. It was an invite to an open mic night, sent to what I assumed were people who had visited the bar before.
Something no one knew about me was that I wrote songs. Writing had been something I would do when everything became too much. Writing is what I did before I started getting into fights. Since Bones more or less put a stop to my fighting I had started writing more again. This was my chance to actually play some of my songs in front of people.
Even though it meant not hanging out with Bones tonight I decided to go. I tossed the padd onto Bones’ bed before grabbing my jacket and heading out the door. The invite said it started in less than a half hour so I had just enough time to get there.
The bar had a little old fashion feel to it, something I could see Bones enjoying. As I sat down at the bar I couldn’t help wondering why he didn’t come here more often. I felt kind of stupid after thinking that because I knew why he didn’t come. I was constantly dragging him to other bars where all the crowds tended to be.
Before I could think on that much more someone climbed on stage, grabbing the mic. He introduced himself as the owner of the bar before calling up the first of the open micers. I signed up to play near the end so I got to listen to the others play before me.
I sat at the bar for almost an hour listening to the others play. They were all pretty good and the crowd seemed to enjoy them. I relaxed as I listened to them, sipping my drink and trying not to think about what I was going to do. My songs were what I poured my heart into, it was my thoughts and feelings, something I barely ever shared with anyone yet here I was about to share them with a crowd of people I didn’t know.
When it was finally my turn I downed the rest of the drink and stood up, walking onto the stage. As I looked out over the crowd I couldn’t help swallowing in nervousness. I was slightly petrified. Just like any other time I was scared of doing something I refused to let that stop me. I sat down on the stool and picked up the guitar that was beside it before looking out over the crowd.
I made myself relax, taking a few deep breaths before closing my eyes. I started to strum, letting myself fall into the song.
I need someone, that I'll look to,
In the lonely hour, that we all go through
To give me comfort, and love me through
In the lonely hour, I need you
I need you
I need you
Growing up I used to think I didn’t need anyone. I never imagined that I would come to rely so heavily on anyone like I have come to rely on Bones in the last few months. I needed him more than I ever thought I would need anyone or anything.
I don't need diamonds, I don't need jewels
No amount of riches will cover up these blues
I don't need suggestions, on how to start anew
In the lonely hour, I need you
There's nothing I can do
I'm helpless without you
If Bones was there for me I didn’t need anything else. I didn’t even need to be a captain of a Starship, I didn’t need to go into space as long as Bones was in my life. I didn’t know how I ever functioned without him in my life.
It's a lonesome point of view
When there's a wishful silence, in an empty room
These other voices, they don't cut through
In the lonely hour, I need you
I need you
And I need you
Since Bones came into my life I no longer heard the other voices in my life, the ones that were constantly telling me I was worthless and a failure. I only heard Bones’ voice, supporting me and telling me I could do anything.
I need someone, that I'll look to,
In the lonely hour, I need you
I need you
As I sang the final lines I opened my eyes and looked out across the crowd. Standing in the middle of the crowd, staring at me with wide eyes and a hurt expression was the one person I never wanted to hear this song. Bones.
The crowd broke into applause but it fell on deaf ears because all I could focus on was Bones and the beating of my heart, the panic I was feeling as he turned away and started pushing through the crowd.
I swore as I saw him leaving, jumping off the stage and running after him. I reached him just as he exited the bar, grabbing his arm and trying to stop him. “Bones?! Bones please stop.” I pleaded with him as he kept walking despite me holding onto him.
After a few steps Bones finally turned around and glared at me, the pain in his eyes causing me to flinch back. I didn’t know what to say to get that hurt look off his face.
He didn’t say anything as he stared at me for a moment before turning away and walking off again. I followed behind him as he stalked back towards campus, trailing behind him quietly till we got to his dorm building. He didn’t look back at me as walked into his room but he left the door open so I assumed he wanted me to follow him.
I closed the door and glanced up at Bones before glancing down at the floor. I couldn’t take the look on his face, the hurt and anger I saw.
“Why didn’t you tell me… anything?” He asked, his voice soft.
I walked towards him nervously before sitting down beside him. “I thought that if I told you I would lose you.” I mumbled quietly, glancing up at him for a moment before looking away.
Bones huffed and rolled his eyes. “What part of it made you think you would lose me?” I raised an eyebrow at that.
“Which part? How about the part where I was confessing my feelings?” I asked, throwing my hands into the air.
Bones frowned and glanced at me. “I was actually talking about the fact you sing, play the guitar, you write songs. But lets skip those and go straight to the confessing part.” He looked at me, raising an eyebrow. “Who were you confessing about?”
I looked at him for a minute, trying to figure out how serious he was and if he was teasing me. He looked serious though, which made my heart start beating faster. I glanced down at my hands which were twisting into knots in my lap.
I took a deep breath, holding it in for a minute as I steeled myself for what I was about to do. I pressed my lips against his briefly before pulling away and glancing down nervously, waiting for him to yell at me or hit me.
I jumped when I felt hands cupping my cheeks, tilting my face upwards. I found myself looking into a pair of warm, brown eyes and a blinding smile.
“That’s what I was hoping for.” He muttered quietly before kissing me gently, a warm hand moving to cup the back of my neck. I sighed happily as I kissed him back eagerly, wrapping my arms around his shoulders as I kissed back with everything I had.
He pulled away slowly, resting his forehead against mine as he smiled gently. I smiled back, pressing forward to brush my lips against his again. I couldn’t believe this was happening, that I had confessed, though inadvertently, and Bones felt the same about me. I couldn’t believe that I finally got a chance to kiss the lips I dreamed about every night.
I hummed happily as I pulled away again before murmuring “So how did you end up down at the bar?”
Bones pulled away with a laugh. “Well Mr. Genius you left the invite open on MY padd.” He grinned and pulled me closer. “You would think that as a genius you would have realized that I would see it when I got back since it was on my padd.” He shrugged. “You had to be the one who opened it and since you weren’t there I figured you would be there.”
I grinned and cuddled against him a little. “So you went to find me?” I chuckled a little. “I’m glad you came to find me.”
“Of course I did. Whats a Saturday night without you kid?” He murmured quietly before kissing me again. I knew as he pulled me down to lay against his chest on the couch that I had the person who would see me through my lonely hour. I had found the person who would always be with me, the only one I needed.