Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

For a long time, I lived a normal life. But things happened that changed it forever. Let me explain.

  Here are some things about me. My name is Caitlyn. My pronouns are she/they. I would have changed my name since I came out as nonbinary when I was fifteen, but I couldn’t decide on a name. I also like girls. My parents are also divorced.

   I don’t exactly know why they got divorced. All I know is, when I was four, my parents got divorced and I had to spend every other weekend with my dad. When I was about eight, he met my stepmom and she gave birth to my little half brother. They got married not long after that. 

   My life after they got married slowly went downhill. By the time I turned 17, I wasn’t doing well mentally. I wanted to end it, but there was one thing keeping me from doing it. Well, two things.

   My little siblings were amazing. I loved them so much. I didn’t kill myself because I didn’t want to leave them. If their mom was a bitch to them, I wanted to protect them. I felt like I raised them more than she did because she wasn’t a great parent to begin with. She hurt me in the past and I wanted to make sure that she never hurt my little siblings. They were sweet kids and didn’t deserve that trauma.

   When I turned 18 and graduated high school, I moved into the dorm room at my college and was happy. I thought that I could finally be happy (and maybe get in a relationship). But that didn’t end up happening. 

   One day, I went for a walk outside near my college. Someone came up from behind me and killed me. It happened so fast I didn’t know who it was or why they did it. 

   Eventually, my consciousness started to fade away and I died.

I woke up in a void of nothing. I felt nothing and couldn’t see anything. I walked forward and saw a light. I went to it and touched it.

   I was suddenly in what looked like an office. I went to a desk. I asked the woman, “Hello? Where am I?”

   “You’re in the Afterlife.” She said, “You died and made it here.”
   “What?” I exclaimed. “I can’t be dead!” Then I remembered what happened before I entered this place. “Oh no.”

   “Do you remember now?” The woman asked. When I nodded, she said, “I’ll take you to where you need to go. Were you religious in your life at all?”

   “No, not really.” I said. “I believed that there was a place for people after they died, but I didn’t know what exactly.”

   The woman typed something on her computer, grabbed a folder with my name on it, and got up from her seat. “Okay. Follow me.”

   I followed the woman down a long hallway. I looked around. There were many people here. There were also some demons there. All of them were different. Some had wings and others didn’t. Some had tails and others didn’t. Every demon’s skin were a different color. 

   “Where am I going?” I asked.

   “You’re going to Universal Judgement and they’ll decide where you go.” The woman said. She smiled and added, “But I’m sure you’ll go somewhere good.”

   Nervous, I asked, “Where would I go?”

   “You have a few options.” The woman said. “I saw your file and saw you’re a good person. You can go to the Void, which basically means you won’t exist anymore. You can go to Universal Judgement and see if you can get a Paradise. Or you can be reincarnated. What do you want to choose?”

   “I want to see if I can get a Paradise.” I said. “If I can’t, I’ll pick something else.”

   The woman nodded.

   As we walked, I asked the woman, “What’s your name?”
   “My name is Melody.” She said, “What’s yours?”
   “Caitlyn.” I said.

   We walked into another hallway and into a room that vaguely resembled a courtroom. There were three figures sitting there. I couldn’t see their faces. Melody handed them the folder with my name on it and they looked at it. They whispered something to each other and then seemed to nod in agreement. The figure in the middle spoke.

   “Caitlyn,” They said, “You have earned Paradise.”

   I knew what that meant. It was good. I wasn’t being sent to Hell.

   We left the room and I felt a tear fall down my cheek. When I went to church, people always told me that I would go to Hell for being nonbinary. But this proved that that wasn’t true. 

   “Are you okay?” Melody asked me.

   I wiped the tears away. “I’m fine. Better than fine, really. I always thought I would go to Hell for being in the LGTBQ community. That’s what people in my hometown told me would happen. That’s one of the reasons I never went to church. But I now know they’re wrong.”
   “Of course they’re wrong.” Melody said. “Why would someone go to Hell for changing their pronouns or loving who they want? That’s stupid.”

   I smiled. “So, where do I go?”

   “The hall for Paradise is down the hall. Your Paradise is ready for you when you're ready. But, if you aren’t ready to see it yet, you can help out in the Hellp Desk if you want.” Melody suggested.

   “Okay.” I said. “Where is that?”
   “Follow the sign that says Hell.” Melody instructed. “There’s a bit of a line. But tell the woman named Lily that Melody sent you and I’m sure Lily will let you work there.”

   “Okay.” I said. “Thank you!”

   I walked in the direction Melody said and waited in the line. 

   “Hi!” A woman with red hair and a black and white hood greeted me when I got to a desk. “Welcome to Hell. This is the Hellp Desk. How can I help you?”

   “Hello,” I said, “I just died and I heard about this place. I was wondering if I could maybe work here. I-It’s okay if you say no. I was just wondering because I have a Paradise but I’m not ready to see it yet.”   

   “Yes, of course you can.” An old woman said. She had a southern accent. “You can work here as long as you want.”
   “Thank you.” I said. “What are all your names?”

   The redhead pointed to a kid in a shark onesie. “That’s Sharkie. They aren’t a kid. They are just really short. I’m Lily.”

   A woman in a red hoodie walked over to me. “I’m Penny. It’s nice to meet you.”

   “I’m Judy.” The southern woman said. “There are two other people who help out here but they’re on break. Their names are Ruggy and Angel.”

   Sharkie walked over to me and hugged me. “You’re now in our work family. Congrats. There’s no getting out of it.”
   I chuckled. “I don’t want to leave. You guys seem really cool.”

   “Good.” Sharkie said. “We won’t let you leave anyway.”
   I looked around and asked, “Is there a break room?”

   “Yes,” Penny said, pointing. “It’s down that hall.”
   I nodded and started walking. When I got there, I saw a demon. She had black hair, brownish skin, red horns and tail. She wore a red shirt and a black skirt. She also wore black combat boots. She turned around and I saw she had red eyes. I guessed she was a demon.

   “Hello,” She said. “What’s your name?”

   “I’m Caitlyn.” I said. “What’s yours?”

   “I’m Nixie.” She told me. “It’s nice to meet you.”

   “It’s nice to meet you, too.” I said. “Do you work at the Hellp Desk?”

   “Sometimes.” Nixie said. “But I mainly help on the therapy levels.”
   “There are therapy levels?” I asked, surprised.
   “Yeah.” Nixie nodded. “Sometimes a soul just needs help. When they are done with those levels, they have a chance to be reincarnated and earn a Paradise. It’s nice.”

   “It sounds like it is.” I said. 

   “Want to be friends?” Nixie asked.

   “Why?” I asked. “You just met me.”
   “Yeah,” The demon said, “But you seem cool. So, what do you say?”
   “Sure.” I smiled. “You seem cool, too. Let’s be friends.”
   Nixie smiled at that. Then she asked, “How are you here? What happened?”
   I told her, “Someone attacked me while I was on a walk outside my college and killed me.”
   “Holy shit.” Nixie breathed. Then she asked, “Did you get a good place in the Afterlife? Where did you end up?”
   “I made it to Paradise.” I said. “But I haven’t seen it yet.”

   “Why?” 

   I took a deep breath. “I’m scared. I’m scared that, if I see it, I’ll have to acknowledge that I’m actually dead.” Suddenly a thought struck me. “Oh shit. My parents! They don’t know I’m dead! How will they react? Oh, and my little siblings! They’ll be devastated!”

   “Hey.” Nixie said gently. “It’s going to be okay.”

   “You don’t know that.” I said with tears in my eyes.

   “I do.” Nixie said. She looked around. “I want to show you something.”

   She took me into the break room and opened a computer. She typed something and a screen popped up. It read, ‘MortalTube.’

   “What is this?” I asked.

   “You can watch your siblings’ lives from this website. It’s like YouTube, but you can watch a human’s entire life from it.” Nixie explained.

   “Huh.” I said. “Cool.”

   I took the computer and typed my little brother’s name.

   My little brother, Ryan, appeared on the screen. He was playing on his tablet. My dad was on the phone in the same room. He suddenly burst into tears. I had never seen him cry before. I realized he found out I died.

   “Dad?” Ryan asked. “What’s wrong?”

   “Your older sister, Caitlyn,” My dad managed to say, “is dead.”

   “What?” Ryan exclaimed. “How?”

   “I don’t know.” My dad grabbed her coat. “Get Kayla. We’re going to the hospital.”

   I closed the computer, not able to watch any more. 

   “Are you okay?” Nixie asked.

   “I-I wish I didn’t leave them.” I said, my voice cracking.

   Nixie hugged me. 

   We stayed like that for a while. When we finally let go, I went out of the break room and to the Hellp Desk. 

   “Um, guys?” I asked.

   “What is it, Caitlyn?” Judy asked. “Are you okay?”

   I took a deep breath. “I want to see my Paradise now.”

   “Want us to come with?” Sharkie asked. 

   I nodded. We walked out of Hell and into the lobby area where I first woke up. There was a big white door. We entered it and, when I opened my eyes, I was in my Paradise.

   It looked exactly like some of my fantasy worlds in one place. It was amazing. There was a house that looked like the house I grew up in for the first four years of my life. The rest of it looked exactly how I imagined it would look in my head. There were mountains, a beach, and I could see a small cave that resembled a place from my Wolves of Power story that I created. There was even a body of water (I wasn’t sure if it was a lake or an ocean. I decided I would figure it out if I decided to go in the water). There were even some creatures from Greek mythology there too. From where I stood, I could see pegasi in the sky and a centaur in the woods. 

   I walked around and found the house and decided on a room where I would sleep. I smiled because the house reminded me of the fun I had when I was a kid.

   I earned this. I thought with a smile on my face. 

   I looked around and saw some weapons in a corner in the living room. Not questioning why they were there, I grabbed a dagger and decided that it would be perfect for the Hellp Desk.

   I explored my Paradise more. By the time the sun set, I had explored half of it.

   I went back to the house, my house, and laid down on a bed. I closed my eyes and fell asleep.

Chapter Text

I explored the rest of the camp when I woke up. When I was done, I went down to the Hellp Desk. 

   “Hey, Caitlyn.” Sharkie greeted me when I got there. “How is your Paradise? What does it look like?”

   “We all made bets on what it would be.” Lily said. “I said it would be something from a book. Sharkie said nature theme. Judy and Penny guessed it would be your house.”
   “Does money have a value here?” I asked. “Since we’re dead?”

   “Not really.” Penny said. “We just use it for fun like betting.”

   “Nice.” I said.

   “Who won?” Sharkie asked eagerly. “Did I get it right?”

   I smiled. “Well, as cool as it would be to have a nature themed Paradise, Lily got it right.”

   “Yes!” Lily exclaimed. “Pay up!”

   “What is it?” Judy asked.

   “It’s a mix of my stories and my life.” I said. “The land is like parts from my stories, and my house is the house I grew up in for the first four years of my life. I found a library in a secret room and found all my Greek mythology books. I also found books about other mythologies, too. It’s awesome.”

   “You could meet Athena, you know.” Sharkie said as she ate a cookie.

   “Wait. Seriously?” I asked in disbelief.

   “Yeah. All pantheons and gods from all religions are here.” Lily said. “That includes Greek gods.”
   “This is awesome.” I breathed.

   “Are there any creatures in it?” Sharkie asked. “Penny’s has dragons.”

   “Yeah.” I said. “I saw a Pegasus in the sky.”

  “Cool!” Sharkie said. “You should try riding it! You can’t die if you fall since you’re already dead!”

   “That is a good idea.” I started. “But I won’t try that yet. I want to get used to it before I do.”

   “Good idea.” Lily commented.

   “Hey! Excuse me?” A soul slammed her hand down on Lily’s desk.

   “Oh shit.” Sharkie muttered. “Caitlyn, you’re gonna want to watch this.”

   “Don’t slam your hand on my desk.” Lily said coldly. “Now what do you want?”

   “I shouldn’t be here.” The soul said.

   “Yes, you should.” Lily said, looking at the soul’s file. “You were a homophobic and transphobic asshole. You were racist, and you also yelled at employees when they didn’t do what you wanted even though they literally couldn’t do what you asked or they would have gotten fired.”

   “That was their problem, not mine.” The soul, who I decided to call Karen, said. “They should have been better at their job.”

   “Or,” Lily said, “You could have not been a dick.”

   Karen gasped. “How dare you! I want to speak to your manager.”

   “Oh, here it is.” Sharkie muttered. I raised an eyebrow. Sharkiee looked at me and smiled. “Watch this.”

   Lily took out a metal baseball bat with the work ‘manager’ written on it in sharpie. Lily smiled and said, “Say hi to Manager.”

   Then she hit Karen in the face with the bat. The soul’s face was a bloody mess after that. When Lily was done hitting Karen with the bat, one of the demons took Karen to her level.

   “Wow.” I said. “That was badass.”

   Lily smiled. “Thanks.” Lily’s phone started to ring and she answered it. She looked at us and said, “I got to go. Bel needs me.”

   “Who’s Bel?” I asked.

   “Her demon husband.” Penny said. “I’m married to a demon, too. His name is Greg.”

   “Wait. Can we actually date the demons?” I asked, shocked.

   “Yeah.” Penny said. “And they’re really good as partners. For starters, they’re big on consent and respect boundaries.”

   “That’s cool.” I said.

   “Are you thinking about dating one, Caitlyn?” Lily asked.

   I blushed a bit. “No. I don’t even have a crush on anyone.” I looked down. “Besides, even if I did like someone, it’s not like they’ll like me back.”

   “Why would you think that?” Lily asked.

   I bit my lip. “I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

   “Alright.” Lily said. “But we’re all here to listen if you want to talk about it. Okay?”

   “Yeah. We’re your work family.” Sharkie said. “We’ll support you in whatever you decide.” 

   I smiled. “Thanks, guys.”

   “No problem.” Sharkie said. “What are friends for, am I right?”

   After that, I talked with a few more people who just had questions about the Afterlife before heading back to my Paradise.

   I went into the house and looked inside. It looked exactly how it looked in the past. The only difference was that there were some weapons in it.

   I decided to cook something. I made French toast and bacon. I went outside with my food and sat down on a chair on the deck. As I ate, I noticed someone walking toward me. It was Nixie.

   “Hey, Nix.” I said. “How are you?”

   “I’m good.” Nixie replied. “So, this is your Paradise, huh?”

   I nodded and smiled. “Yeah.” I looked down at my plate. “I made some French toast and some bacon if you want some.”

   Nixie smiled. “I’d like that.”

   We went inside and I made my friend some French toast and gave her some bacon. Then, we sat on a couch and ate our food.

   “Your Paradise is really nice.” Nixie said.

   “Thanks.” I said. “It feels like a dream. Like I shouldn’t be here and yet I am. It’s awesome.”

   “Yeah, it might take a bit to get used to being here.” Nixie said. “Especially if your Paradise looks like a place from a fantasy world.”

   “Do the others at the Hellp Desk have a Paradise?” I asked.

   Nixie nodded. “Yeah. Sharkie’s is an aquarium and there are some prehistoric animals like the Megalodon in it. Lily has Hobbiton. I think Judy just had her old house that she lives in with her husband James. Penny has dragons, but I’m not sure if it's from a fantasy thing or not. All of them look really cool.”

   “Where do you live?” I asked. “I’m guessing demons have homes, too.”

   “Yeah.” Nixie said. “But it’s not crazy. It looks like…” She paused a moment before continuing. “Well, it kinda looks like this. Just bigger and more rooms.”

   “Cool.” I said. “I would love to see it sometime.”

   “Okay.” Nixie smiled. “Let me know when you want to come over and I’ll show you.”

   “Okay.” I smiled back. “I can’t wait.”

   After that, we played a few rounds of Cards Against Humanity. By the time we were done, the sun had set and it was nighttime.

   “You could stay over here for tonight.” I offered. “You don’t have to go home in the dark.”

   “It’s okay, Caitlyn.” Nixie told me. “Unlike in the mortal world, no idiot is going to try anything like hurting me on my way home. I’ll be okay, don’t worry.”

   I felt something and reached into my pocket. It was a phone. I didn’t even realize I had one here.

   “Oh, you have a phone.” Nixie said. “Can I take it real quick? I need to do something.”

   I gave it to her. After about three minutes of looking back at her phone and mine, Nixie handed it back. I opened it and I was in a group chat. The names were even labeled. Lily, Sharkie, Penny, Judy, Nixie and two other people who I didn’t know were in it.

   “Who are the other two people?” I asked.

   “They’re Lily and Penny’s partners.” Nixie replied. “One of them is Beleth but we all call him Bel. The other one is named Gregorith, but we call him Greg.”

   “Okay. Thanks for adding me.” I said.

   Nixie smiled. “No problem. You’re a part of the group now. So, you deserve to be in the group chat.”

   “Do I really belong in it though?” I asked, self doubt hitting me like a truck. “I mean, you don’t really know a lot about me. We just met not too long ago. So, why do you think I belong with you guys?”

   Nixie gave me a soft smile. “You belong with us, Caitlyn. Don’t worry about that. We let you join our friend group because you’re a good person. You belong, don’t worry. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”

   I felt like I was on the verge of tears. No one had ever told me before that I belonged, and I never felt like I belonged anywhere in life. 

   It took death for me to feel like I fit in somewhere. I thought. I’m glad I met them.

   “Well, I should get going.” Nixie said. “See you tomorrow at the Hellp Desk?”

   I nodded. “You bet.”

   “Okay. Bye.” With that, Nixie left. 

   I took a deep breath. Then, I decided to stay in the house for the night. I took care of the dishes and went to the bedroom. Then, I fell asleep.

Chapter Text

In the morning, I went to the Hellp Desk. When I got there, I could hear a lot of noise coming from one of the tunnels.

   “What is going on?” I asked Lily.

   “Oh, a bunch of succubi are visiting.” Lily explained. “Most of them are down that tunnel, which is the Employee Dungeon.”
   “What’s that?” I asked innocently.

   Sharkie gagged. “You do not want to know.”
   Lily chuckled. “Relax, Sharkie. Caitlyn, it’s basically where some of the employees go if they want to have some… spicy fun.” 

   I blushed. “Oh.”
   “Yeah, and I think Ruggy is there now with Angel.” Sharkie said. “Or they’re in the break room talking to other demons. I’m not sure.”

   “Who are they?” I asked.

   “Ruggy is another worker here.” Lily said. “She was sent here, but she’s a recovering Karen who uses her Karen abilities for good. Angel is her succubus girlfriend.”

   “Okay.” I said. “Nice.”
   “They’re in the break room.” Judy said, scaring me. “I was just there. The succubi there are lovely people. You should meet them, Caitlyn. I bet you’ll like them.”

   “Yeah.” Lily said. “It’ll be good for you to meet more demons here. It’s not wrong to have more friends.”
   “But…” I paused. “But what if they don’t like me?”

   Judy put a hand on my shoulder. “They’ll like you. I promise.”

   “Yeah,” Lily said, “You are a good person. I can’t think of a reason why they wouldn’t like you.”

   “Okay.” I took a deep breath. “I’ll meet them.”
   I walked to the break room and saw some succubi. I saw someone who I guessed was Ruggy and two other demons I didn’t know. I noticed those two demons didn’t have tails.

   Ruggy turned her head and saw me. She wore a red shirt that said ‘Hellp Desk Trainee.’ She waved her hand, signaling for me to come over. I walked over to them.

   “Hey, Caitlyn. I heard about you from the others.” Ruggy said. “How are you?”
   “I’m good.” I said. I looked at the two demons. “Who are they?”

   “This is Angel,” Ruggy held the demon with pinkish skin and white and black hair. Her horns were black. She wore a crop top and black leggings with black combat boots. “My girlfriend.”

   “It’s nice to meet you.” I said. “I’m Caitlyn. What are your pronouns? Mine are she/they.”

   Angel smiled. “She/her. It’s nice to meet you.”

   “Nice to meet you, too.” I said. I looked at the other demon. “What’s your name?”

   “I’m Meg.” She said. She extended her hand. “She/her pronouns for me. It’s nice to meet you, Caitlyn.”
   “Nice to meet you, too.” I said, blushing a bit. I shook her hand.

   She’s so pretty. I thought. And her voice is so cute and hot! I blinked. I am so gay.

   Meg had light purple skin. She had a tail that was the same color as her skin. Meg’s hair was white and faded to pink for most of it except her bangs. Her bangs were white faded to light blue. She had light pink horns and purple eyes. To me, it looked like Meg worked out because her arms looked muscular. It made me wonder what she did in the Afterlife. She wore a sky blue dress with the sleeves cut a bit to show her shoulders. Her tail stuck out from her skirt.The skirt was a bit darker shade of blue. She wore gray boots.

   Ruggy smiled and looked at Angel. “We’ll let you two talk a bit. Let’s go, Angel.”

   Angel smiled back at her girlfriend and they both left, leaving me and Meg alone.

   “So,” I said, trying to think of what to say. “How are you?”

   Meg chuckled. “I’m good.” She paused as if unsure what to say. Meg asked, “So, when did you get to the Afterlife?”
   “Not long ago.” I said. I wasn’t ready to tell her how I died.

   I think Meg noticed that I didn’t say how I died, but she didn’t mention it. Instead she asked, “Did you see how your family reacted on MortalTube?”
   I nodded sadly. “Yeah. I saw my dad on the phone and he told my siblings to come with him. But I stopped watching after that. He looked so… so distraught. I couldn’t bear to see my family like that. So, I stopped watching. I might check up on them someday, but not right now.”

   “That’s understandable.” Meg said. “I hope your family is okay now.”
   “I hope so, too.” I muttered.

   “So, do you have a Paradise?” Meg asked, trying to change the subject.

   I nodded. “Yeah. It’s my house from when I was a kid and parts of my stories that I made.”
   “That’s cool.” Meg said. “I just live with Nixie.”
   “Are you two a couple?” I asked, afraid of the answer but not sure why.

   Meg shook her head. “No. She’s my cousin and she stays over at my place sometimes.”

   “Oh.” I said, embarrassed. “I’m sorry I assumed you were a couple when you said that.”

   “Don’t be.” Meg assured me. “Most people think that when I say that because Nix and I don’t look anything alike. I’m not offended, don’t worry.”

   “Okay.” I let out a sigh of relief. “Good.”

   Meg smiled. “And besides,” She leaned in and whispered into my ear, “If I was in a relationship, I wouldn’t be able to flirt with a cute person like yourself right now.”

   I blushed. “Y-You think I’m cute?”

   Meg smiled. “Of course. Do you not think that?”

   “No hot girls have ever told me that before.” I said, “Besides you.”

   There was a minute of silence between us.

   As soon as I said that, my face turned red. “I did not mean to say that.”

   Meg laughed. “I’m glad I’m not the only one who is flirting here, or trying to.”

   I blushed. “I’ve never flirted with anyone before or had a girlfriend.”
   “What’s your sexuality?” Meg asked. “I’m pansexual.”
   “I don’t know what I am.” I admitted. “I only ever figured out my gender identity. I knew I liked girls. But I always wondered if that made me a lesbian or neptunic. I could never decide which one I was.”

   “That’s okay.” Meg said. “You don’t need to put a label on it. You know what you like, so it doesn’t matter. As long as you’re happy with who you are, that’s what matters.”

   I smiled. “Thanks.”

   “No problem.” She said. Then she reached into her skirt (Wow, I thought. It has pockets!) and took out her phone. Meg looked at me and asked, “Can I get your number? You seem really interesting and I want to get to know you more.”

   “Sure.” I said. I could feel my face blush a bit and a big smile appeared on my face. I took out my phone and gave Meg my number.

   “Thanks.” Meg said. “We should hang out sometime.”
   “I would love that.” I said. “Where?”
   Meg looked thoughtful for a moment. “Maybe Morning Starbucks?”

   I gasped. “There’s a Starbucks here?”

   Meg smiled. “Then it’s settled. Let’s go there tomorrow and hang out. I’ll get you at the Hellp Desk, okay?”

   “Okay!” I said. “I can’t wait.”

   We separated and I went back to the Hellp Desk. I was really happy. Finally a date with a cute girl!
   I shook my head. No. It’s not a date. We are just hanging out. I am not developing a crush on her. Not after what happened with my last crush. I am not going through that again. Never again. Besides, why would anyone love me like that?

   “You okay, Caitlyn?” Lily asked.

   “Yeah.” I said.

   “How was your conversation with Meg?” Penny asked. “It seemed like you two were having a good conversation.”
   “It was good.” I said. “We’re going to go to Morning Starbucks tomorrow and hang out. She’s coming here to get me since I didn’t know there was a Starbuck here until she mentioned it.”
   “Cool!” Lily said. “That sounds fun.”
   “So it’s a date?” Penny asked smugly.

   “No.” I said quickly. “It’s… It’s not a date. We aren’t dating. I don’t have a crush on her. I can’t. We are just becoming friends. That’s all.”
   “Okay.” Penny said, backing off. “Okay.”

   “You okay?” Lily asked. “Like actually okay?”
   Even though I wanted to tell them, I was worried about how they would react. So, I decided I would pretend that everything was fine. I said, “I’m okay. I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

   “Alright.” Lily sighed. “If you insist. But, if you want to talk, I’m here to listen.”

   “We all are.” Sharkie cut in.

   I smiled. “I know. Thanks, guys.”
   “Anytime.” Lily said,

   I took a deep breath. “I’m going to go to my Paradise. See you guys tomorrow.”
   “Bye!” Sharkie and Penny said at the same time.

   I went to my Paradise and went into the house. I went into my room and collapsed onto the bed and started to cry. The memories of my past flooded my mind. 

   I remembered my first crush and what she did. I hated her. She was the reason I was afraid to love. Because of what she did to me, I couldn’t let myself love again. 

   Now that I met Meg, for some reason, that just made that old fear resurface. 

Chapter Text

The next day was chaos at the Hellp Desk. There were so many souls that my friends and I had to deal with. Luckily, we dealt with most of them before Meg showed up to pick me up.

   “Hey, Meg.” I said. I blushed a bit at her outfit and I noticed, at the corner of my eye, Lily smirked. I glared at her.

   Meg was wearing a white crop top and a black leather jacket. She also wore ripped  jeans with black boots.

   “Hey, Caitlyn.” She said, “Are you ready to go?”

   I nodded. “Yup.”

   “Have fun, you two.” Lily told us.

   Meg took me to Morning Starbucks and it looked exactly like one from the mortal world. The only big difference was that there were demons and people of the Afterlife there. 

   We talked and we had a lot of fun together. I started to feel feelings I hadn’t felt in a long time. But I pushed them aside in fear of being hurt. 

   When we were done, we said goodbye and planned to do it again sometime. I went back to the Hellp Desk and sat at my desk, lost in thought.

   “Are you okay, Caitlyn?” Judy asked me.

   I looked up. “No, not really.”

   “Did you hang out with Meg end badly?” Judy asked.

   “No,” I said, “it went great. But… I realized something and I’m scared to confront it.”

   “Do you want to talk about it?” Judy asked.

   I thought about it for a moment. I was tempted to stay silent and deal with it on my own and bottle up my feelings. But I knew that that wasn’t a good idea. So, I took a deep breath and said, “That… That probably would be a good idea.”

   “Okay.” Judy stood up from her desk. “Come with me. Let’s go to my Paradise and we can talk.”

   I stood up. Lily walked over and asked, “Where are you two going?”

   “Caitlyn here needs help with something.” Judy said. “We’re going to my Paradise to talk about it.”

   “Can I come with you?” Lily asked. “I might be able to help.”

   I thought about it for a moment. Then I said, “Sure.”

   We all walked to Judy’s Paradise. Her house looked amazing. It looked like a log cabin.

   “This place is beautiful.” I told her.

   “Thanks, sweetie.” Judy said. “It’s what my house with my husband looked like.”

   We walked to the porch and sat down at a table. The chairs were comfy.

   “So, what did you want to talk about?” Judy asked me.

   I took a breath. “We were talking about family and I remembered my grandpas. They died when I was young; one before I was born and the other when I was four. I barely know anything about them.”

   “If they died,” Lily said, “They might be in Paradise.”

   “They might,” I said, “but I’m scared. I barely know them outside of stories told from my grandmas and other family members. I don’t know if they’ll support me liking girls or being nonbinary. I’m scared of what will happen when I meet them.”

   “From the stories you’ve heard,” Judy asked, “Did they seem like bad people?”

   I shook my head. “No.” 

   “Then I’m sure they’ll like you.” Judy told me.

   I took a deep breath, trying to not freak out. “Okay. I’ll see them. I know where their Paradise is. Well, one of them, anyway.”

   “Then I think you should go see them.” Judy said. “From my experience, I think your grandpas are waiting to meet you.”
   A thought struck me. “If they want to meet me, then why not see me as soon as I died and came here?”
   “Maybe they didn’t know.” Lily suggested. “Not all souls that live in the Afterlife watch MortalTube. So, it’s possible they just didn’t know you were here.”

   “Maybe.” I said. I took a deep breath. “Okay. I’ll try to meet them.”
   “Awesome. When will you go?” Judy asked.

   I stood up. “Now.”
   “Okay.” Judy said. Lily and her both stood up.

   “Good luck.” Lily said. 

   “Thanks.” I said as I left Judy’s Paradise.

   I walked to my Paradise. From what I figured out, my grandpa’s Paradise was next to mine. I took a deep breath, silently telling myself everything would be okay. Then, I knocked on the door.

   “Hello?” A man opened the door. He had gray hair with a few brown strands of hair poking through. His face looked thin but healthy at the same time. He wore a white shirt with a blue and black flannel over it. He wore jeans and brown boots. His eyes were blue like my mom’s.

   “Hello.” I said. “Are you Richard Cramer?” 

   “Yes,” Grandpa said. “Who is this?”

   “I’m Caitlyn.” I said. “Your grandkid.”
   “I’m a grandpa?” He asked. Then his face lit up with realization. “Oh, I remember watching on MortalTube when you were born. Bill and I watched your entire life. But we didn’t know you were here because we were busy.”
   “What were you doing?” I asked.

   Grandpa smiled. “I’ll show you.”

    He let me inside his Paradise. It looked like the house he and my grandma lived in when my mom and uncle were growing up. There was a small deck in the front of the house. I remembered a story that Grandma told me that Grandpa made the deck while he was sick with cancer.

   We went inside the house and, sitting on the couch, was Papa. 

   He had messy brown hair with gray streaks and bangs that went to his eyes. His eyes were brown. Papa wore a white shirt and a black jacket. He wore jeans and black boots.

   “Who’s this, Rich?” Papa asked. Before Grandpa could answer, Papa said, “Wait. I remember you. Caitlyn, is that you?”

   I nodded with tears in my eyes. I was afraid that Papa would deadname me. But he had been watching my life. So he knew my pronouns and what my name was.

   “Y-You've been watching my life?” I said.

   “Yes,” Papa said. “We have. We wanted to make sure you were okay. When you came out to your parents, we decided that, when you came here, we would support you no matter what.”

   At that, I burst into tears and hugged both my grandpas. I could have sworn they cried a bit, too. When we were done, we all sat on the couch.

   “So, how did you come here?” Grandpa asked.

   “Denise, my stepmom, killed me.” I said quietly. “I don’t want to give details.”

   “Well, when she comes here,” Grandpa said, “I’ll kick her ass.”

   “Yeah.” Papa agreed. “No one hurts my grandkid.”

   I smiled. “Thanks. You're in line with a few other people for that.”

   “Who?” Grandpa asked.

   “My friends at the Hellp Desk.” I said. “I help out there.” 

   I talked about my friends there and what I’ve done at the Hellp Desk. I told them about my Paradise. 

   When I was done, I asked my grandpas, “What were your lives like?”

   “Who do you want to know more about?” Papa asked.

   “Well, Mom, Gram, and Uncle Ray told me some stories about Grandpa. But I was barely able to ask Grandma and Dad about Papa. So, can he go first?”

   “Gram,” Grandpa muttered. “Is that a nickname for my wife?”

   I nodded. “Yeah.”

   “So, Caitlyn,” Papa looked at me. “What would you like to know first?”

   I looked back at him and smiled. “Everything.”

The surprise they were working on was the Cramer Casserole. It was an egg, sausage, and cheese casserole that my dad made on special occasions. While we ate, Papa told me a lot about himself and his life. He told me about his childhood, how he met my grandma, what it was like living with the disease that killed him, how he felt before he died. 

   It was really interesting to me. I was really happy that I could meet them. I was happy that I finally knew what their voices sounded like. My mom showed me and my siblings some videos featuring Grandpa, but I barely remembered them. I barely remembered what Grandpa’s voice sounded like in them. 

   For Papa, I did get to meet him. But he died when I was four. So, by the time I met Papa in the Afterlife, I didn’t remember what his voice sounded like. What’s worse, I didn’t even remember what Papa looked like. But, now that I got to meet them, I finally knew what Papa’s and Grandpa’s voices sounded like. I also finally knew what they looked like. I finally knew who they were outside of stories.

   By the time Papa had finished, the sun had gone down. But we weren’t done talking and we did not feel tired. So, we kept telling stories. Grandpa told his life story and I listened intently. Some of the stories he told I remembered Mom, Gram, and Uncle Scott told me. But I let him tell them. It was nice to hear the stories come out of his mouth rather than other people.

   When we were done, the sky was dark. Grandpa suggested that I stay with them for the night, but I declined. My Paradise was close to Grandpa’s, so I would be fine.

   I left Grandpa’s Paradise and started walking to my own. But something strange happened. The hallway started turning black and I could see anything. Then, I found myself in some throne room.

   There were two thrones in it. One was bigger than the other. The bigger throne had skulls and bones on it. The other also had skulls but it also had some flowery vines wrapping around it. Two people were sitting in the chairs.

   The man in the big throne wore a dark blue shirt with a black cape and a little skull holding it around his neck. He had black hair and dark eyes. He wore black pants and dark gray boots. He had a black metal helmet on his head. 

   The other throne had a woman sitting on it. She didn’t look as intimidating as the man. She had red hair and green eyes. She wore a crown with flowers and bones as decorations. She wore a dark green dress with flowers of different colors on it. She wore dark green heels.

   “Hello, Caitlyn.” The man said. “We’ve been expecting you.”

Chapter Text

“Expecting me?” I asked, confused. “What do you mean? And who even are you?”

   “How rude of me.” The man said. “Let us introduce ourselves. I’m Hades, the god of the Underworld. This is my wife Persephone.”

   “Wait.” I said. “Like the Hades and Persephone in Greek Mythology?”

   The woman, Persephone, nodded. “Yes.”

   Holy shit. I thought. 

   “So, why did you want to see me?” I asked.

   “Hades and I think we’ll be able to help each other.” Persephone said. “We want to help you find the person who killed you, and we want you to help us.”

   “How?” I asked. “What do I have to do?”

   “We want you to help us deal with some souls down here.” Hades said. “It’ll be like the Hellp Desk in Hell, but in the Underworld. By working there, we think we’ll  be able to find the person who killed you.”

   “Why do you want me to help?” I asked. “I’m not special. So, why?”

   “Well, we agreed that you seem interesting.” Hades said. “You also know a lot about Greek mythology, so we think you would be a perfect fit here. But you don’t have to accept it if you don’t want to. If you do decline, we’ll still help you find your killer. We’ll just figure out another way for you to pay us back.”

   “I’ll accept.” I told them. 

   “Really?” Persephone said excitedly. She got up from her seat and hugged me. “Thank you! We know you’ll do great.”

   “We’ll set everything up for you.” Hades said. “You can go back to your home and we’ll contact you when your setup here is ready.”
   “Alright.” I said. I turned to leave but stopped. “Two things. One: How did you make me come here? And two: How do I get out of here?”

   “I used my powers.” Hades said. “And I’ll take you out of here. When you come back, there’s a staircase in the lobby to this place. You’ll know where it is. It has the same theme and vibe as this place.”

   “Also, if you can’t find it, “Persephone added, “You can always ask the secretaries there. They’re lovely. If they ask why, tell them you’re working for us. They’ll show you the way in no time.”
   “Okay.” I smiled. “Thank you.”
   “One last thing.” Hades said. “You can work and leave whenever you want. You don’t have a schedule here. You can work here and at the Hellp Desk on the same day. You could work here one day and the Hellp Desk the next. Your choice. We won’t be mad.”
   “Okay.” I said. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

   Then, I was surrounded by darkness again. When it disappeared, I was in my Paradise. 

   I took a deep breath. My phone buzzed and I looked at it. Two new people messaged me. It was Persephone and Hades.

   They must have gotten my number from the secretaries. I thought. I think I heard one of the souls there say they have everyone’s number if someone needs it. So, that’s helpful, I guess.

   I heard a knock at my door to my Paradise. I opened it and I saw Meg.

   “Hey,” she said. “Is this a bad time?”

   “No, not at all.” I told her. “What’s up? I didn’t realize you knew where my Paradise is.”

   “Oh, I didn’t.” Meg said. “I asked Nixie and she told me where it was.”

   “So, why are you visiting me?” I asked. Realizing that might sound bad, I added, “I mean, I'm not going to make you leave. I'm just wondering.”

   “I just wondered where your Paradise is.” Meg explained. “When I got here, I wondered if you were here.”

   “And here I am.” I smiled. “I just got back from the Underworld.”

   “The Underworld?” Meg asked. “Why were you there?”

   “Hades and Persephone asked me if I could help them deal with some souls there.” I said. “In exchange for my help, they’ll help me find the person who killed me.”

   “That’s cool.” Meg said. “I heard Hades and Persephone seem intimidating but are really nice. Is that true?”

   “Yeah, that’s true.” I said. “You’ve never met them?”

   Meg shook her head. “I’ve seen them, but I’ve been too scared to confront them.”

   “I could introduce you to them sometime.” I offered. 

   Meg smiled. “That would be great.”

   I felt my phone vibrate and took it out of my pocket. “Holy shit.”
   “What is it?” Meg asked.

   “A soul that I have been waiting for is at the Hellp Desk.” I said.

   “Who is it?” Meg asked.

   I looked at her and smiled. “You’ll see.”

   We walked to the Hellp Desk and I saw the soul yelling at Sharkie.

   “I do not deserve to be down here!” She yelled. She had light brown hair and wore a red and black hoodie. I recognized her immediately even though I only saw her a handful of times when I was in the mortal world.

   “Yes, you do.” I said calmly. I walked to the desk and told Sharkie, “I got this, Sharkie. I have been waiting for this one.”
   “Alright.” Sharkie said. I heard them whisper to Meg, “I have never seen them be this calm. It’s kinda scary.”
   “Yeah,” Meg said. “I’m kinda interested to see how this goes.”

   “So, are you going to try to get me out of here?” The soul asked.

   “No.” I said. “I have heard enough of what you’ve done from your son.”
   “Son?” The soul scoffed. “I had a daughter. She was just confused.”
   “Caitlyn,” Sharkie asked, “Do you want me to get Judy? I sense a homophobic bitch.”

   “Oh, she is.” I said. “And go ahead. She’ll enjoy this.”

   “What?” The soul asked. “I am not a bitch. I was just trying to help my daghter.”
   “Helping him by almost hurting him?” I asked. “Yeah, I heard what you’ve done. For example, you son told me that, after one of the drama club cast parties, he didn’t come home at the exact time so you threatened to hit him. That made him almost just out of his window to get away.”
   “She was just being dramatic.” The soul said. 

   “Liar.” I told her. I heard footsteps coming closer to me and I immediately knew who it was.

   “So, is this the bitch Sharkie told me about?” Judy asked.

   I nodded. “Yeah.”
   “Who is this?” The soul asked. “Will you actually help me instead of this bitch?”
   “I am not a bitch.” I said. “I am awesome. So, what other excuses do you have?”

   “You are supposed to help me.” The soul said. 

   “No, that isn’t the job here, honey.” Judy said. “Our job is to make fun of you until you decide to go where you’re supposed to go. We’re only really nice to the souls who actually need help or have questions. You are just trying to get out of your punishment.” Judy looked at me. “So, what did she do?”
   “So, she was an abusive asshole. She threatened to hurt my friend when he was a little late home from a cast party. She was homophobic and transphobic. There is probably more, but that is the main thing. I think my friend said she also had bipolar disorder but didn’t do anything to help with that.”
   “Oh, I will not stand for transphobia.” Judy said. “My son was trans and I, unlike you, supported him.”

   “I did nothing wrong.” My friend’s bitchy mom said. “I was trying to make sure my daughter was corrupted by those LGBTQ freaks.”
   “I’m LGBTQ.” I said. “I use she/they pronouns. Karmen was my friend. When he comes here, I will make sure he kicks your ass… if he wants to.  If and when he does, I’ll help him. Until then,” I looked at Sharkie, “Sharkie, do you have a metal baseball bat?”

   Sharkie smiled and grabbed one from their desk. “Here you go. By the way, you won’t get in trouble for this.”

   I looked at the bat and smiled. “Batter up.”
   I hit my friend’s bitchy mom in the face with the bat. I kept hitting her until her face was a bloody mess. With every hit, I got happier. When I was done, I asked Sharkie to pull the lever to the trapdoor to her level.

   “With pleasure.” Sharkie said. Then they pulled the lever. 

   “That was fun.” I said. “I had been wanting to do that ever since Karmen told me what she did to him. Now one person is off my shit list. Now I have a few more to go.”
   “Who else is on your shit list?” Sharkie asked.

   I thought for a second. “Let's see. My first crush, Karmen’s dad, Karmen’s grandpas… and the rest of Karmen’s shitty family. Oh, and my stepmom.”
   “What did Karmen’s family do?” Judy asked.

   “Well, from what I know, most of them were homophobic and transphobic. His grandpa molested him. I think someone else in his family —I think it was either his other grandpa or the same one who molested him— was a pedophile. There is probably more that I either forgot or he didn’t tell me.”

   “Damn.” Lily said. “His family is shit.”
   “Yeah,” I said. “I will enjoy doing what I did to his mom to the rest of his family. I won’t do it to him, but the rest of his family is an exception.”

   “I’ll help you with that.” Judy said. 

   “Thank you.” I told her.

   “What did your stepmom do?” Penny asked.

   “Well, I’m pretty sure she’s homophobic.” I started. “Also, she’s just a general bitch. She didn’t help take care of my little brother and sister —my half siblings— and made Dad do all the work. She shaved my legs without my consent. She told my brother when he was six that he was ‘too old for toys’ and then said it was a joke, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t. She said that me and my sister weren’t hanging out with my little siblings even though we hung out with them more than she did. She yelled at the Littles —That’s the nickname for my little siblings— for crying even though that would make them cry more. There’s probably more that I’m aware of and more that happened after I died, but you get the idea on why I don’t like her.”

   “Yeah, I can see why she’s on your shit list.” Penny said.

   “Totally.” Sharkie said.

   Lily looked at my shirt and said, “You should get that blood off your shirt. The blood might stain it.”

   “Good idea.” I started to talk away but paused. “How do you get blood out of a shirt?”

   “I’ll show you.” Meg said.

   Sharkie said, “I didn’t know you knew how to do that.”

   “I am a demon of many skills.” Meg told them. Looking at me and extending her hand,  she said, “Let’s go.”

   “O-Okay.” I said as I took her hand. Then we walked to my Paradise. We went into the house and went to my room.

   “I’ll take this shirt off and give it to you.” I said. “But I'll put a new one on so I’m not half naked in front of you.”

   “I’m sure you’d look cute half naked.” Meg paused. “Or naked.”

   I took off the shirt and threw it at her, my face red. “Shut up!”

   I put on a white shirt with a pink and white flannel over it. I walked out of my room and saw Meg scrubbing my shirt in the sink.

   “Thanks for doing this.” I told her.

   “No problem.” Meg said. “What are friends for, am I right?”

   “True.” I said. 

   I then got a text from Hades. I looked at my phone and read it.

   I think I have an idea who killed you. Hades said.

   I responded, Okay. I’ll be in the Underworld in a minute.

   With an okay from Hades and Persephone, I looked up from my phone. I told Meg, “I have to go. Hades just texted that he thinks he might know who killed me.”

   “Okay.” Meg said. “Good luck. Before you go, I have one question.”

   “What is it?” I asked.

   “Will your punishment for your killer be the same or worse than what you did to your friend’s mom?” Meg asked.

   I smiled. “I’ll decide later. But it will most likely be worse.”

   With that, I headed to the Underworld. I saw some souls walk down the hall with me. Some looked scared. Some looked numb. And others looked happy.

   I walked and found a desk and chair waiting for me. It read ‘Underworld Help Desk’ and was painted with different shades of blue and black. Behind the two gods, there was a river. I guessed it was the River Styx. Sitting on the river, there was a boat with a hooded figure on it. I guessed it was Charon. Hades and Persephone were waiting for me.

   “Hello, Caitlyn.” Hades said. “Welcome back. How are you?”

   “I’m good.” I said. “What is all this?”

   “Well, we couldn’t think of a fun name for this setup like the Hellp Desk in Hell, but we tried.” Persephone told me. “Your job here is to mainly listen to a soul’s complaints until they either give up or be bitchy to them until they give up and go where they’re supposed to go. If you have to, there’s a baseball bat just in case you need it. They’ll already have their punishment set up or be told where they’re supposed to go by the time they get here.”

   “Okay. Cool.” I said. 

   “When they are done here, Charon will take them to where they need to go.” Hades said.

   “Okay.” I said.

   Hades smiled. “If you need any help, let us know.”

   I nodded and began to work. Thankfully, I didn’t need to use the bat.  When I was done and about to head to the Hellp Desk, I went to Hades and asked, “Before I came here, you said you had an idea who killed me. Can you explain?”

   “Oh, yeah.” Hades said. “So, we looked at your file and figured out that whoever killed you isn’t going to go here. When they die, they’ll most likely go to Hell.”

   “Okay, that’s good.” I said. “I guess. At least I might find them easier since I work there.”

   “True.” Hades said. “Okay, you can go now.”

   With that, I went to the Hellp Desk.

   “Hey, Caitlyn.” Lily greeted me. “How was working in the Underworld?”

   “It was interesting.” I said. “Luckily, I knew stuff about the Underworld from my Greek Mythology phase when I was alive.” I paused. “Okay. I guess it was just a mythology phase and it hasn’t ended yet.”

   “That’s nice.” Penny said. “Do you like it down there?”

   “Yeah.” I said. “The souls there aren’t as… shitty as the ones here, but it’s still nice. I like hearing the soul’s stories and it feels like a dream that I actually get to help out down there.”

   “Did anything interesting happen while you were there?” Sharkie asked.

   “Not really.” I said. “But Hades did give me some information about my death and who killed me.”

   “What did he say?” Ruggy asked.

   “He said that, whoever did it, most likely won’t go to the Underworld.” I told them. “He said that they will most likely go to Hell. So, that kinda helps. But that doesn’t tell me who it was or why they did it.”

   “Maybe they were homophobic and knew you were nonbinary so they killed you.” Sharkie said. “It would make sense. Yes, it’s fucked up, but it makes sense for a person like that.”

   “I have to agree with the shark.” Penny said. “That kinda makes sense for someone like that to do that, as fucked up as it is.”
   “I guess you’re right.” I said. “I don’t know if that makes me feel better about my death, but I guess it helps a bit.”
   “You’ll accept that you're dead eventually.” Lily told me. “It just takes some time to get used to all this.”
   I gave her a little smile. “Thanks.” I took a deep breath. “I’m going to go to my Paradise. I’ll see you guys later.”
   “Okay, bye!” Sharkie and Penny said at the same time as I left Hell and went to my Paradise.

   When I got there, I went into my house and into my room. I laid down and fell asleep.

Chapter Text

The next day, I woke up and smelled something good. Rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I went downstairs and saw Meg in my kitchen. 

   “What are you doing here?” I asked.

   “Oh, I felt like you needed this after what happened yesterday.” Meg said. “I was going to give you breakfast in bed but, since you’re awake, you can wait here until food is done.”

   “Oh.” I said. “Thank you.”
   I sat down at the kitchen table and Meg put a plate of waffles, bacon, and syrup in front of me. She made some food for herself and sat down next to me.

   “Are you okay after what happened yesterday? It was a lot.” Meg asked me.

   I thought for a second. “I’m okay. I feel happy that I was able to avenge my friend against his mom and I’m glad that I have a clue about where the person who killed me will go after she dies.”
   “But?” Meg asked.

   I took a deep breath. “But I’m scared. What if I don't make her pay for what she did? What if my afterlife isn’t as great as it should be? I mean, it’s been great so far. You, Lily, and everyone at the Hellp Desk have been great friends. But I’m scared that that happiness is temporary and that it will end.” A lump formed in my throat as I felt like I was on the verge of tears. “I’m scared that you’ll all decide that I’m a freak like everyone told me when I was in school and leave me and…”

   “Caitlyn,” Meg said, “We will never leave you. We don’t think you’re a freak or a weirdo or whatever the shitty people in your life called you. You are awesome just the way you are and we love that. We’ll never leave you.”

   I sniffled. “Can I get a hug?”
   Meg nodded and gave me a hug. 

   “Thank you.” I muttered.

   “You’re welcome.” Meg said.

   After that, Meg left and I started thinking about my mortal life. I knew I was nonbinary since I was in eighth grade but never thought about changing my name. I didn’t think I could at the time. But, since I was dead, I had the option to do that. I had a feeling that Sharkie changed her name when she died, so I probably could do that, too. 

   But what if my friends don’t accept? I wondered. Then I started overthinking it. Eventually, I decided to ask someone if they could talk.

   Lily? I texted her. Can you come to my Paradise? I need to talk to you about something.

    She got there in about ten minutes. Her hair was a mess. “Sorry,” Lily said as we went to the couch in my house. “A soul was being annoying. So, what’s up?”

   I took a deep breath. “So, you know how I’m nonbinary, right?”

   “Yeah.” Lily said.

   “Well,” I said slowly, trying to gather my thoughts. “I was thinking I should change my name. But I started to overthink it because I was scared to do it when I was alive because I thought I would get in trouble. I think my name is pretty, but it isn’t exactly me. Does that make sense?”

   Lily put a hand on my shoulder. “It makes perfect sense. So, what do you want to be called?” 

   “I was thinking about Charlie.” I said. “But I think I’m also okay with being called Caitlyn, too.”

   “Charlie.” Lily echoed. “I like it.” She smirked. “I’m sure Meg will like it, too.”

   I perked up. “You think so?” I paused. “Wait. I mean…”
   “Do you have a crush on her, Charlie?” Lily asked, saying my new name. 

   I thought about it for a moment. “I don’t know. If I do, I’m scared.”

   “Why?” Lily asked. “Being in love is an awesome feeling. There’s no need to be afraid of it.”

   “It was the first time,” I admitted. “But, after what my first crush did, I’m scared it will happen again.”
   “What did they do?” Lily asked.

   “She ghosted me.” I explained. “I hate her. I hate her so much. She broke my heart and made me afraid to love again. I thought that fear was gone but, after I met Meg, that made those fears come back. I don’t…” I took a deep breath, trying to not cry. “I don’t want to feel that hurt again.” I paused. “I just realized I may have abandonment issues.”

   “I don’t think that will ever happen.” Lily told me. “Meg’s a good person. Besides, I doubt any of the demons would ever do that. They’re good people.”

   “But what if she doesn’t like me back?” I said quietly.

   “I don’t think you’ll have a problem with that.” Lily said.

   “Huh?” I asked, not entirely hearing her.

   Lily shrugged. “I’m not telling. But I can tell you that everything will be okay. You’ll see. Take your time. Tell her when you’re ready. It’ll be scary, but it will be worth it once you get your feelings out.”

   “You think so?” I said.

   “I know so.” Lily replied.

   We talked a bit more. Then I decided to head back to the Hellp Desk with Lily. When we got there, we told the group that I wanted to try being called Charlie now. Thankfully, they were supportive.

   “So, Charlie,” Judy said. “Why did you pick that name? Did you just pick it out because it sounds nice?”

   “I heard it in a show I watched and liked it.” I explained. “I also thought it sounded kinda nice with my middle name.”

   “What was your middle name?” Penny asked.

   “Jean.” I said.

   Sharkie snickered. “Like the pants?”

   Lily elbowed them in the ribs. “Sharkie.”

   “Sorry.” Sharkie said, rubbing her side.

   “The name kinda ran in my family. From what I remember, my great grandma, my great aunt, my mom, and I all had that name somewhere in our name. Mom, my great aunt, and I all had it as a middle name and my great grandma had it as her first name.” I explained.

   “If you had kids in the mortal world,” Penny asked, “would you give them that name?”

   “If I wanted kids, yes.” I said. “But, after having to take care of two little kids because of a shitty stepmom and because I simply don’t want to be a mom, I don’t want them.”

   “That’s understandable.” Sharkie said.

   “Would you rather just be in a relationship and have a pet instead of a kid?” Lily asked.

   “Maybe.” I said. “But I’ve never had a pet before. My parents never really let me or my siblings have a pet and I never thought I would have been mentally okay enough to take care of one. But, now that I’m dead and don’t have many mental health issues anymore, maybe someday.”

   “Cool.” A very attractive voice said. I looked up and saw Meg.

   “H-Hey Meg.” I stammered. She looked so pretty that day. She wore a white dress with a rainbow of colors on it. It looked like someone splattered rainbow paint on it and it was a bunch of blobs on her dress. It was really cute.

   “Hey Caitlyn.” Meg said. “What are you guys talking about?”

   “I kinda changed my name.” I told her. A strange anxiety filled my mind. Part of me was scared she wouldn’t accept the change. “I-I’m still okay with being called Caitlyn, but I also want to try the name Charlie.”

   “Okay.” Meg said simply. “I’ll change your name in my phone to that now so I don’t forget.”

   True to her word, Meg pulled out her phone and started typing. I smiled, happy that she accepted my new name.

   Lily gave me a weird look that looked like it said ‘Tell her that you like her.’ I ignored it.

   “Do you guys need any help at the desk?” Meg asked.

   “Sure.” Lily said. “You can help out. You can sit by Charlie if you want.”

   “Awesome.” Meg said. “I’ll grab a chair from the break room. I’ll be back in a minute.”

   When Meg was gone, I asked Lily, “Seriously? You didn’t have to do that.”

   “What?” Lily asked innocently. “I didn’t do anything.”

   I rolled my eyes and looked at the direction where Meg walked. When I looked back, I was alone at the desk.

   Great. I thought, annoyed. They did this on purpose.

   “Hey.” Meg said, making me jump. She laughed. “Sorry. Where did the others go?”

   “I don’t know.” I replied. “I’m guessing they went to see their partners and probably fuck. And Sharkie probably went to their Paradise to avoid that.”

   “Okay.” Meg said. “Is it still okay if I help you out here?”

   “Yeah.” I said. “Thank you.”

   Meg smiled. “You’re welcome.”

   We sat quietly at the desk for a few minutes, waiting for a soul to come. Then a man came. He looked pissed.

   “Hi, welcome to Hell. This is the Hellp Desk.” I said. “What can I do for you?”

   “I shouldn’t be here.” He said. “I didn’t do anything wrong. I didn’t hurt my wife or kids.”

   “Just because you didn’t do those things doesn’t mean you weren’t a dick.” Meg said as the man’s file appeared on my desk. “And look at that. You do belong here.”

   I touched the file and saw what the man did. He didn’t hurt his family, but he was homophobic and racist. He was also an animal abuser. He hurt the dog his kids got for one of their birthdays so much that it died. After that, he was on a walk and got mauled by a pack of wild dogs.

   “You definitely belong here.” I said. “But, based on what I saw, you got what you deserved in the end. Go down to level six or else I’ll be forced to use my bat.”
   The man muttered something under his breath, but he walked away. 

   Meg looked at me and said, “You’re getting good at this.”

   I blushed. “You think so?”

   She nodded. “Yeah. You’re doing great even though you basically just started working here. Yes, this job is easy, but still. You’re doing better than I did when I first started doing my job.”

   “What do you do?” I asked.

   “I work with Bel’s legions.” Meg told me. “I’m a soldier. It’s not terrible work, but it can be exhausting.”

   “That’s really cool.” I commented. 

   “Thank you.” Meg said. 

   “Does anyone else in your family do stuff like that?” I asked.

   “My dad did, but he decided to stop after an incident where he got really hurt and do something else. He now helps the people in the Front Desk.” Meg explained. “I don’t know if my little siblings will do it when they’re old enough, but I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.”

   “How old are your siblings?” I asked.

   “My little sister is fourteen and my brother is ten.” Meg replied.

   I could help but ask, “How old are you?”

   “About twentyish.” Meg said. “Time here isn’t like in the mortal world. So, I’m twenty here, but I have no idea how old I would be in the mortal world.”

   “Interesting.” I said. “I died when I was nineteen.”

   “How did you die?” Meg asked.

   For some reason, I was afraid to tell her. Would she think it as dumb? Would she think it was stupid for me to not fight back and survive? I didn’t even know it would happen. I was just trying to go on a walk and then… BOOM! Someone attacked me from behind and I ended up in the Afterlife.

   “I’m not ready to talk about it yet.” I told her.

   Instead of being judgemental, Meg just nodded. “Will you tell me when you’re ready?”

   I nodded. Meg smiled. Then another soul came to the Hellp Desk. We dealt with him together and, after five more souls, the rest of the Hellp Desk crew came back.

  “Hey, guys.” Penny said. A tall demon with red skin and black hair was next to her. “How are you?”

   “Good.” I said. “Who’s that?”
   “This is Greg.” Penny said. “My husband.”

   “Nice to meet you.” I said. “I’m Charlie.”
   Greg nodded. “It’s nice to meet you, too.”

   “Where is Lily?” I asked.

   “With Bel.” Penny said. “I think they went to her Paradise.”

   “We’re right here.” A deep, male voice said. I saw a purplish demon with black hair next to Lily. 

   “Hey.” Lily said. “How were things at the Desk today?”

   “Good.” I said. I looked at the demon next to Lily. “Who’s that?”

   “This is Bel, my husband.” Lily said.

   “And my boss.” Meg said. Looking at Bel, she said, “Hey, Bel.”

   “Hey, Meg.” Bel said. “It’s nice to meet you, Charlie. Lily’s told me about you.”

   “Cool.” I said. “It’s nice to meet you, too.”

   Bel smiled and looked at Lily. They looked so cute together. Same with Penny and Greg. It made me wish that I had something like that.

   Would that be here or in the mortal world? I wondered. Do I even want to go back? 

   I decided that I would figure out the answers to those questions later. 

   “It’s nice to meet you both.” I said to Bel and Greg. “I would stay, but I kinda want to go home.”

   “Want me to walk you there?” Meg asked.

   “I’ll be fine.” I said. After a moment of silence, I said, “actually, sure.”

   Then, I said goodbye and Meg and I left Hell. But, as we were about to leave, I saw a face I did not expect to see.

   “Ryan?”

Chapter Text

My little brother ran over to me and gave me a big hug. I crouched down and hugged him back. He was a bit taller than my waist and he had brown hair and a little birthmark on his forehead that Dad used to call his ‘Harry Potter mark’ when he was a baby. He wore a gray shirt with black pants. He hugged me tighter.

   “What’s wrong, little dude?” I asked him as I rubbed his head. I had always touched his hair ever since he was a baby. “What happened?”

   My brother sniffed and muttered, “Mom happened.”
   At first, I didn’t understand. Then I realized my worst fear came true. 

   I had always known my stepmom was a bitch. I had known that ever since we met. But I never expected she would actually kill her own kids. I had daydreams where she did and she got arrested, but I never thought she would actually do it. Hearing Ryan say was proof to me that my hate for her was accurate. 

   “S-She also said something before she…” Ryan didn’t say the last word but I knew what he meant. “She said t-that she was the reason you died. S-She said t-that you were a f-freak who liked girls an deserve to die s-so she…”

   “She killed me.” I guessed the end of his sentence. 

   Ryan nodded. “She… she said she had someone kill you.”

   Oh course she did. I thought bitterly. Couldn’t be bothered to kill me herself. That asshole.

   I shook my head and kissed his forehead. “How is Kayla?” 

   “I think she got away and got help,” Ryan looked at a lady behind a desk. “Right?”

   “Yes,” The lady said. “Your sister got the neighbors, told them what happened, and they called the police. The husband was also a cop, so he was able to stop her before she did any more damage.”

   I let out a sigh of relief. “Good.”

   But that didn’t stop her from killing my brother. Or me. I thought bitterly. I looked at my brother.

   “Are you okay?” I asked him.

   He was silent for a moment before replying. “I don’t know.”
   I kissed his forehead. “It’s okay. It’s a lot to take in. It took me a while to accept the fact I was dead. But I was lucky enough to make some great friends here that helped me. Do you want to meet them, or do you need some time before that happens?”

   Ryan was silent for a moment before quietly saying, “Can I stay with you for a bit until I’m ready?”

   I nodded. “Of course.” I looked at Meg. “You can go back to the Hellp Desk. I’m going to take Ryan home with me.”
   Meg nodded. “Alright. Text me if you need anything.”

   With that, I took Ryan to my Paradise. He looked around and muttered something about it looking cool. I smiled at that comment.

   There were three bedrooms in the house. I let Ryan pick the one he wanted to have. When he claimed it, the house automatically made it look how he wanted. It had Transformers merchandise everywhere and the walls were painted blue.

   Ryan jumped onto his bed. I told him, “Get some rest, kid. I’ll be here when you wake up. We could explore this place if you want when you wake up. You just say the word.”

   Ryan nodded. “Okay.” After a moment of silence, he quietly asked, “Can you stay here with me? I don’t want to be alone.”

   I looked at him and anger filled my mind. He must have been scared that Denise would try to hurt him here. So, I walked over to his bed and sat down next to him.

   “Ryan,” I told him, “Your mom will never be able to hurt you ever again. I won’t ever let her or anyone else hurt you. You’re safe here. I promise.” 

   Ryan smiled a bit. “Thank you, sis.”

   I held him. “You’re welcome.”

   With that, we both fell asleep. When we woke up, it was the next day so I made breakfast for us. Then we explored my Paradise and Ryan made fun of me for wearing gym shoes and socks to the beach.

   “I hate sand when it touches my feet.” I said. “I have some sensory issues and that hasn't gone away in death. So, I wear socks all the time to help with it.”

   “Is that why you keep your hair short?” Ryan asked.

   “Yeah,” I said. “If my hair, or anything else, touches the back of my neck,” I shuddered. “Nope.”

   “Are you autistic?” Ryan asked. “One of my friends at school was autistic and he told me he had sensory issues, too.”

   I thought for a moment. “Maybe. But I was never diagnosed, so I don’t know for sure. What I do know is that my body and mind are different from other people and I’m okay with that. Being different can be cool.”

   “What if people make fun of you for being different?” Ryan asked.

   “I just don’t care.” I said. A thought struck me. “Well, it depends on the person. If it’s someone I don’t like, then I don’t care about their opinion of me. But, if it’s someone I do like…” I paused, trying to find the right words.

   “You care about what they think about you.” Ryan continued the sentence for me. “You care if they hate you when you don’t hate them.”

   I nodded. “Yeah. How did you guess?”

   Ryan shrugged. “I’ve known you my whole life. I think I know you by now.”

   “Not everything.” I muttered.

   “What do you mean?” Ryan asked.

   I said nothing for a moment. After taking a deep breath, I asked my brother, “Do you support people who like the same gender?”

   Ryan nodded. “Yeah. They just want to be happy with the person they love like everyone else. Why does it matter what gender they are?” Ryan looked at me. “Why do you ask?”

   “I’m gay.” I said. “I like girls. I also want to use she/they pronouns and be called Charlie. I thought you should know since you’re family.”

   Ryan was silent for a minute before saying, “Is that pink person your partner?”

   I blushed. “No! We’re just friends.”

   Ryan looked at me and made a face. “Suuuure.”

   I threw sand at him. He laughed. I asked, “So you support me?”

   Ryan looked at me and smiled. “Of course I do, Charlie. You’re my sister. My older sibling. And I love you. I don’t care who you date as long as you’re happy and they are a good person to you.”

   I felt like I was about to cry. Hearing my brother say this was really nice. I hugged him. “Thank you.”

   He hugged back. “You’re welcome, Charlie.”

   When I pulled away, I said, “Just so you know, my parents don’t know. Denise doesn’t either. I don’t want her to know. When they come here, let me say it, okay?”

   Ryan nodded. “Alright. It’s your secret to tell.”

   “Thanks, kiddo.” I kissed his forehead.

   We stayed in my Paradise for a few days. We explored my Paradise together and caught up on what happened after I died and I told Ryan parts of my past that he didn’t know about (which was a lot). He was accepting and understanding of it all and I was happy about it. Knowing he didn’t hate or judge me for what happened in my past, it made me happy. When I told him about what his mom did to me, Ryan did not look happy.

   “So she wasn’t a good person way before she killed us?” Ryan asked.

   “Yeah.” I said. “I had a bad feeling about her from the moment Dad introduced her to me and my twin. But I just ignored it because I thought she made him happy, and I wanted Dad to be happy. But, after she shaved my legs without my consent, I knew she was bad news. As she did more and more shitty things, I knew Denise was a bitch. I wanted to protect you and Kayla from her, but I wasn’t around often enough to stop her from doing stuff while I wasn’t there.”

   “Dad helped Kayla and me.” Ryan said. “He made sure she wasn’t a complete jerk to us.”

   “That’s good.” I said. “I don’t know how I would feel if she physically hurt you. She was already neglectful of you and Kayla. I knew that would cause some mental problems for you and her. I wanted to help, but I already had mental issues of my own.”

   “What were they?” Ryan asked. 

   “I used to daydream a lot.” I said. “I had something called Maladaptive Daydreaming. It basically meant I was stuck in a fantasy world in my head. My Paradise has places from my daydreams. I wanted to be a writer and the daydreams helped me come up with stories and I liked that part. But it also was bad because it made me not do much. It made me stuck in my room and not be with you littles or anyone else in my family. It sucked, but there wasn’t anything I could do. I couldn’t tell my mom because she probably wouldn’t have believed me. I would never tell Denise, and Dad already had enough going on. He didn’t need to have that to deal with, too. I tried to stop, but it was hard. It wasn’t until I died and came here that I realized it was finally gone.”

   “You said issues.” Ryan said. “What is the other one?”

   “I have anxiety.” I said. “I’m pretty sure I still have that. I used to pick at my skin and nails when I was anxious.”

   Ryan’s face lit up in realization. “That’s why you had wounds on your fingers sometimes!”

   I nodded. “Yeah.”

   My brother looked at me, his expression serious. “Why did you lie and say you were fine when I noticed them?”

   I looked down at my hands. “You were so young. You didn’t need to know about my mental health problems. I thought I could deal with it on my own.”

   “Doing stuff like that alone isn’t good.” Ryan said. “You could have asked for help.”
   I looked at him and gave him a little smile. “I know that now. I’m trying to ask for help when I need it.”

   “Good.” Ryan said. “And, if you need help or anyone to talk to, I’m here. We’re family. We help each other. So, if you need to talk or vent about anything, let me know.”

   I smiled at him. “Okay. Thank you. You can do the same thing with me.”

   “I know.” Ryan said. He hugged me. “I love you, Charlie.”

   I hugged him back and closed my eyes. “I love you, too, kiddo.”

Chapter Text

The next day, Grandpa and Papa visited my Paradise. Ryan was playing by the house when they came over. At first, my brother was confused as to who they were. When I explained they were my grandpas, he understood.

   “Are they both my grandpas, too?” Ryan asked.

   “Well, Papa is Dad’s dad.” I said. “Grandpa is my mom’s dad. So, he isn’t your grandpa.”

   “But I’ll still consider you my grandkid.” Grandpa said. “You seem fun. Want to play a game?”

   “What game?” Ryan asked.

   “Oh my god, Richard.” Papa sighed. “Don’t teach the eight year old how to gamble. Not yet.”
   “What’s gambling?” Ryan asked.

   “An older kid thing.” I told him.

   “Charlie learned when she was a kid.” Grandpa said. “So did my kids. He’s old enough. He can count. So, he can play.”

   “What’s the game?” Ryan asked, sounding frustrated. 

   Grandpa said, “It’s a card game called 31. Basically, you have three one dollar bills and a deck of cards. You need to get as close to 31 points as you can to win. The person with the lowest amount of points in a hand has to pay a dollar. The last person with a dollar left wins. If you get 31, everyone has to pay a dollar. Aces are 11 points and kings, queens, and jacks are all 10 points.”

   “Cool.” Ryan said. “Does the winner get to keep the money that was given up?”
   Grandpa nodded. “Yup.”
   Ryan’s eyes lit up and looked at me. “Can we play?”

   I sighed and said, “Fine. But I don’t want to sit next to Grandpa.”
   “Why?” Grandpa asked, sounding offended.

   I looked at him. “Mom, Gram, and Uncle Ray all told me a story where you kept giving people who sat next to you 2s. I do not want to have an endless amount of 2s, thank you very much.”

   Grandpa chuckled. “Yeah, I did do that. Still do.”

   As I walked into the house, I said, “That’s why I’m not sitting next to you. Papa, you can take that spot.”

   “Hell no!” Papa said. “Not it!”

   “I’ll do it.” Ryan said with a smile.

   “You better not do it to the kid.” I whispered to Grandpa as we asked inside. “It’s his first time playing. Don’t give him a lot of 2s.”
   Grandpa shrugged and said, “Can’t make any promises.”

   To my surprise, Grandpa only gave Ryan two 2 cards. Papa was the first to be eliminated and lost all his money. Grandpa was next. By the end, it was just me against Ryan. Even if he was my little brother, I did not go easy on him. But, surprisingly, Ryan won the game. He cheered and took the money to his room.

   “That’ll boost his confidence for a while.” Grandpa said.

   “Ya think?” Papa said a bit sarcastically. He added, “It was his first time playing and he won. So, he’s definitely going to get a confidence boost from that.”

   “Did you guys go easy on him?” I asked.

   “A little.” Grandpa said. Papa nodded in agreement.

   After that, Ryan stayed with my grandpas and went to Papa’s Paradise. I stayed in mine and went to my room to sleep.

It was like a nightmare I had when I was in the mortal world. I kinda knew what was going to happen, and yet it still scared me. As I sat on the floor in a dark room, I looked up and saw her.

   She was my first crush. She had light brown hair and blue eyes. She wore a white shirt and black pants. She was so cute and definitely my type. But I hated her. She ruined my love life.

   “Why would anyone ever love a freak like you?” My nightmare crush asked. “You're nobody. You’ve done nothing good. You couldn’t even save your brother from your stepmom. Why would anyone ever love you if they knew what your past really is?”

   I put my hands over my ears. I shouted, “Shut up!”

   But my first crush didn’t listen. “You’ll never find love. You’ll be alone forever. You will never find a person willing to love you. Even if that somehow happens, when you tell them your past, they’ll leave you. You will be alone and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

   Meg appeared in the nightmare. I was shocked. She had never appeared in my dreams before. 

   No. I thought. Please go away. Not now.

   “Why would I love a mortal soul like you?” Meg asked. “You are so weird and annoying. Just go to the Void and disappear. No one will miss you.”

   I had heard of the Void. Lily said that you could go there permanently or temporarily. It’s where you simply stop existing. 

   Meg and my first crush continued to say horrible things about me while I just sat in the dark room and cried.

I woke up with tears in my eyes. I did not move in my bed for thirty minutes after I woke up. I just sat there and cried. Those things that were said in the nightmare hurt. Even though I was over my first crush and I knew that Meg would never say things like that, it still hurt. 

   When I was done crying, I got up and ate. I texted Lily that I probably was going to the Hellp Desk that day. She responded and told me that it was okay and to take care of myself. I told her I would.

   Ryan went to the demon school that day. Lily and Sharkie suggested that it would be good for him to have something familiar like school while he was in the Afterlife. Sharkie took him to the school since they went there and knew where it was. 

   While Ryan was at school, I ate breakfast and tried to ignore the memories that were triggered by the nightmare. I took a deep breath and grabbed my phone.

   Hey. I texted Meg. The scared part of my  brain told me that she actually believed the stuff the nightmare version of Meg said, but the logical part of my brain told me that it was just a nightmare and that didn’t mean Meg thought those things about me. I asked her, Want to hang out today?

   Sure. Meg replied almost immediately. Where?

   Could I go to your house? I asked. 

   After a moment, Meg replied. Sure.

   She sent me directions to it and I went immediately. I knocked on the door and Meg answered. She wore a red, white, and black flannel shirt with ripped jeans. I was in a pink and purple hoodie with black leggings and black boots.

   “Hey,” Meg said. “Are you okay?” I bit my lip and shook my head. Meg asked, “Want to come inside?” I nodded.

   We went inside and I sat on the couch. Meg asked if I wanted hot chocolate and I agreed. After she got us both a cup and sat down next to me, I told her about the dream.

   I didn’t tell her that I possibly had a crush on her. I didn’t know if she felt the same way, and I wanted to be sure if she liked me back before I said anything. Also, I needed to figure out if I did love her in a romantic way or as just a friend.

   While we drank our hot chocolate, I told Meg that I had a nightmare where someone from my past told me that I was worthless and unlovable. Then, I said she showed up and told me that she didn’t actually care about me and that she hated me. By the time I was done talking, our hot chocolate was gone. Tears started to form in my eyes as I said this.

   “Can I hold you?” Meg asked. I nodded. She wrapped her arms around me. “I would never hate you. You are my friend. Why would anyone tell you you’re unlovable?”

   “Because I am.” I muttered. I took a deep breath. “When I was alive, I wasn’t the best person. I wasn’t so bad that I ended up in Hell, but I wasn’t great. Mainly because I was struggling with my mental health. I would lash out to my family and friends. The more shit I had to deal with, the worse it got. I hated myself every time. But I couldn’t open up to anyone about it.”

   “Why?” Meg asked, hugging me tighter.

   I wrapped my arms around her. My head rested in her chest and I blushed. I could hear her heartbeat. “Because my mom wouldn’t believe me if I said I was struggling. I tried to tell her I needed therapy but she didn’t let me go. To be fair, I never exactly told her why I wanted to go. But I was anxious almost all the time and I had something called Maladaptive Daydreaming which meant I daydreamed constantly. I hated that. It made me ignore my life. Whenever I tried to make it stop, it came back worse.”

   “That sounds awful.” Meg commented.

   “It was.” I said. “But a part of me liked it. I wanted to be a writer and it helped me create stories. That was probably why I didn’t try to stop it as hard as I probably should have. I was scared that, without it, I wouldn’t be able to make stories anymore. Looking back, it was kinda dumb, but I honestly thought that.”

   “Were there times it got better?” Meg asked.

   I chewed on my lip, wondering if I should tell her.

   Meg said, “You don’t need to tell me if you don’t want to. It’s your story to tell.”

   I took a deep breath. “It kinda got better when I met… the friend I told you about that was in my nightmare. She… she was my first crush. I really liked her. She was pretty, funny, and I liked talking to her. We met in a theater camp that lasted a week. When it ended, we exchanged phone numbers and went on our way. I texted her almost every day and my feelings grew stronger. But, at one point, she stopped replying to my messages.”

   “Why?” Meg asked.

   I shook my head slightly and closed my eyes. “Once school started again, I still had a crush on her and foolishly hoped she would reply to my messages. I hoped she would respond to them so I could tell her how I felt. That day never came. One day in health class in 8th grade, we were learning about relationships. Healthy ones, toxic ones, stuff like that. When the teacher was talking about toxic relationships and mentioned ghosting, I knew what my first crush had done. She ghosted me.”

   I continued by saying, “When I got home, I cried. I had never cried that hard for anyone ever. Not even when my great aunt and uncle died. The things that were said in the nightmare were playing in my head on loop. When I had basically finished crying, my mom walked in.” 

   “What did she do?” Meg asked.

   “Nothing.” I said. “She didn’t realize I had been crying. I tried to sound like I was okay and had just been bawling my eyes out. After that day, my mental health got worse. That December, I told my twin what happened and he texted her. He told her that she was a bitch for doing that and that she should apologize and text me back. But she said that she ‘didn’t text much’ and ‘forgot to tell me.’ I didn’t text her again, and she didn’t either, but that conversation made me feel a bit better. But I didn’t delete her number for a few months after.”

   “Why?” Meg asked me.

   I sighed. “I guess some part of me still felt feelings for her and hoped she would text me. But that never happened. I eventually moved on but never fully recovered from that. Now I’m scared to fall in love or develop a crush again. But I think it’s getting better.”

   “You sure?” Meg moved some hair out of my eyes.

   I looked at her face. It was full of concern. I gave her a small smile and said, “Yeah.”

   We stayed in each other’s arms for a while. After what felt like forever, Meg finally spoke.

   “It wasn’t your fault.” Meg said.

   “Hm?” I asked.

   “What your first crush did wasn’t your fault.” Meg said. “You aren’t unlovable. I remember Lily told Sharkie that someone’s inability to love you doesn’t make you unlovable. I think you’re afraid that you are unlovable so you’re afraid to fall in love. But that’s not true, Charlie. You are loved. Whether that be your family, friends, or by your future partner. You are loved. I just want you to know that.”

   “Thank you, Meg.” I nuzzled my head into her chest. “I needed that.”

   Then I realized I should pick up Ryan from school.

   “I should go.” I said, getting up from the couch. “I need to get Ryan from school.”

   “Okay.” Meg said, standing up. She looked at me and I felt like she was staring into my eyes. “Will you be okay?”

   I nodded. “I will be. I promise.”

   “If you need anyone to talk to, call me. I don’t care what time it is. Okay?” Meg told me.

   I smiled, happiness and an unfamiliar feeling fluttering in my chest. “Okay.”

   Then I walked out of Meg’s house and went to my brother.

Chapter Text

After I picked Ryan up from school, I dropped him off at Papa’s Paradise. I was going to go to Hell and work at the Hellp Desk and I didn’t want him to see the violence that happened there.

   When I got there, I saw Judy, Penny, and Lily. I waved and walked over to them.

   “Hey, guys.” I said. “How are you guys?”

   “We’re good,” Judy said. “How are you?”

   “I’m okay.” I said. “Could be better.”

   “What happened?” Penny asked. 

   “I just had a nightmare last night and had to deal with that.” I said. “Meg helped calm me down though. So that was nice.”

   “Meg went over to your house?” Lily asked. 

   “No, I went to her house today.” I told her. “That’s why I didn’t come here immediately.”

   “What was the nightmare?” Judy asked.

   “Just about an old friend.” I said. “I’m okay though.”

   “You sure?” Penny asked. “You could take the day off. You don’t have to go here every day if you don’t feel like it or want to.”

   “I’m fine, guys. Really.” I told them. “I think the best thing for me right now is to deal with shitty people and give them what they deserve.”

   Lily shrugged. “Your choice. Just know that you can leave or go to the break room whenever you need to.” 

   I nodded. “Alright.”

   Then I got to work. Luckily, I mostly got souls who had questions about the Afterlife or were confused why they were down there. Not in a malicious way, but in a ‘I’m curious what I did wrong and how I can fix it so I can be a better person’ kind of way. 

   When I was done, I left and got Ryan from Papa’s Paradise and went home. 

   Later that day, I got a text from Meg.

   Hey. She said, I know this might be sudden and you don’t have to agree to this. But my family is having a little get together in a few days and they said I could bring a friend. Would you like to go? There will be some kids there so, if you bring Ryan, he’ll have some kids to play with.

   Okay. I said. I’m in.

   I asked Ryan if he wanted to go and he agreed. So, when the day came, I went to the house Meg told me about. It looked like a mansion. 

   “Are you sure you want to come, kiddo?” I asked Ryan. “You don’t need to come with me.”

   “I want to.” Ryan insisted. He held my hand. 

   I sighed. “Alright. Let’s go.”

   I walked to the front door and knocked. Meg answered it.

   “Hey.” She said to us. She looked at my outfit up and down. I blushed. I was wearing a white shirt with a black jean jacket. I also wore jeans with combat boots. “You look great.”

   “Thanks.” I said. “You too.”

   I meant it. Instead of the feminine clothing she usually wore, Meg wore a button up white shirt with black pants and tennis shoes. Her hair was in a ponytail. She looked so hot in my opinion.

   “Can we go inside now?” Ryan asked. I agreed, not realizing I was staring at Meg.

   We walked in and there were many demons. Some looked a bit like Meg. Others looked mostly different. But they all felt similar in their own way.

   I guess that’s what happens in big families. I thought, remembering my own family. 

   Meg took me and we walked over to a tall demon. He was about 7 feet tall  and had white hair and reddish skin with some scars on his arms. His eyes were the same color as Meg’s. I guessed this was her dad.

   “Hello.” I said.

   “Hey,” he said. “You must be Charlie. Meg has told us a lot about you.” 

   I looked at her. “You have?”

   “Yeah.” She said, her face making her seem like she was a bit shy at that moment. Like she was afraid that I would be mad if she talked about me to other people.

    Meg’s dad said, “My name is Zornoth. Nice to meet you, Charlie.” 

   “It’s nice to meet you, too.” I said. 

   We talked for a bit and then Meg’s mom showed up. Meg introduced us and I learned that her mom, Mor, knew how to cut hair. That made me remember something that I wanted to do when I was alive but could never do. But, since the person who prevented me from doing that wasn’t there, I had an idea.

   “Could you give me a haircut?”  I asked Mor. I showed her the picture on my phone. The sides of the head and the back were shaved and there were wavy bangs that swept to the side. 

   “Of course.” She said, “It would look great on you.”

   “Really?” I was shocked she would agree to it. “You don’t think it would make me look like a boy?”

   “I don’t think that matters.” Mor told me. “If you like it, then you can have it. I would gladly give you that haircut.”
   “Thank you!” I said, getting excited.

   After that, Mor took me and Meg (who insisted on watching) to her office. She got out her tools and started cutting. As she cut, I told her about my sensory issues that I had and she brushed the cut hair away from my neck when she was done cutting. When she was done, I looked amazing. I felt like I looked like me.

   “Thank you so much!” I said as I gave her a hug.

   “You’re welcome.” Mor said. “If you want to change it or need to recut, let me know. I’ll happily do it.”

   I nodded and we left the room. I looked around and saw my brother. He was playing with some of the other demon kids. 

   Mor looked at me and asked, “Is that your kid?”

   I knew she was talking about Ryan. “No, he’s my little brother. Well, he’s technically my half brother but I don't care. He’s still my brother, even if we have different moms.”

   “That’s a nice mindset to have.” Mor commented.

   “Agreed.” Zornoth said, startling me. I had forgotten he was there.

   As if he heard me talking about him, Ryan ran over to me. “Hey, sis!”

   “Hey, buddy.” I said, rubbing his hair. “Are you having fun?”

   He nodded. “Yep!”

   “Good.” I said. Then one of the demon kids called his name and Ryan ran right back over to them. I smiled, happy that he was having fun.

   As time passed and it got later, I spent most of my time talking to Meg. We laughed, made jokes, and had a good time together.

   The party ended and Meg walked us back to my Paradise. I thanked her and put Ryan to bed. I stayed up, thinking. Then I got an idea.

   In the morning, I found what my idea included. Ignoring my overthinking and anxious  thoughts, I put it on and went to the Hellp Desk.

   “Hey, guys!” I greeted the employees of the Hellp Desk.

   Sharkie looked at me up and down. Then they smiled. “You’re wearing a onesie.”
   “Yep!” I said. I was wearing a zebra onesie and holding my favorite stuffed animal, a zebra named ZZ.

   “Can I ask why you’re wearing it or are you wearing it just because you can?” Judy asked.

   “I was thinking last night and I remembered that Sharkie wears her’s all the time and I wanted to try it. I also have my zebra stuffed animal because she’s my favorite and it matches the pajamas.” I explained.

   “Nice.” Lily said.

   “I think it looks stupid.” A soul behind Lily’s desk said. “Put something else on that makes you look professional. You look like a child.”
   “Let me have fun, asshole.” I said. “I’ll wear what I want. You can’t tell me what to do. If I want, I can wear and do things that might be ‘childish.’ As my dad always said, ‘you can grow old, but you don’t have to grow up.’ I live by that statement.”

   “Your dad sounds cool.” Sharkie commented.

   I smiled sadly. “Yeah, he was.”

   Then I heard footsteps coming toward my desk. I looked behind me, my hood falling. Behind me was Meg. She looked almost as amazing as the day before.

   She wore a white shirt, a black leather jacket, and black pants with combat boots. She looked amazing.

   “Hey.” I said, feeling a bit flustered.

   “Hey.” She replied. She looked at me up and down. I blushed, suddenly feeling embarrassed. 

   Is she going to make fun of me? I wondered even though I had a feeling she wouldn’t.

   “Nice onesie.” Meg said. She touched ZZ’s head. “Nice stuffed animal, too.”

   “Thanks.” I held ZZ tighter. “I got this stuffed animal a long time ago when I was either two or three. I kinda stole it, but my mom could have gone back to the store and paid for it. But, from what she said, it was cold out and she didn’t feel like walking from the car all the way back to the store to pay for them. So, she let me and my twin keep them.”

   “Your twin got one, too?” Meg asked.

   “Yeah.” I said. “I got a zebra and he got a llama. He kinda forgot about the one he got as we got older. But ZZ has always been special to me. I don’t know why, but I don't care.” 

   “That’s cool.” Meg said. She looked at my desk and said, “I see a few souls at your desk so I think I should leave you alone for now.” She waved and started to walk away. “See you later.”

   I nodded, mesmerized at my pretty demon friend. I shook my head and decided to focus on work.

   “You okay?” Penny asked.

   “Yeah.” I said.

   Lily smiled. “I think our friend has a crush.”

   I blushed. “What? No, I don’t!”

   “Charlie,” Lily said in a serious tone. “Are you just saying that because you don’t actually have a crush? Or are you in denial and don’t want to say anything?”

   I paused to think for a second. I quietly said, “Maybe a mix of both.”

   “Why are you in denial?” Penny asked muttered. 

   “Because, last time I liked someone, they ghosted me.” I said, holding ZZ closer to my chest. “Also, why would a badass demon like her ever have a crush or love me?”

   “You seriously need to work on your self esteem and confidence.” Sharkie commented.

   “Probably.” I said. 

   “Are you going to tell Meg?” Sharkie asked.

   “Not yet.” I said.

   “Yeah, she should tell her when she’s ready.” Lily said.

   “Alright.” Sharkie said.

   Soon, the day ended and I went home. Then I got a text from Lily in the group chat.

   Hey everybody. Lily texted. There’s going to be a trivia night tomorrow night. How many of you are interested? I’ll send the directions to the people who are.

   I thought about it. I wasn’t great at trivia. But it would probably be fun to do it with friends. Then I saw a reply. Meg agreed to it. I decided I would do it if it was with her.

   That is probably one of the gayest things I’ve done. I thought. I am very gay.

   I texted, I’ll do it.

Chapter Text

Before I went to trivia night, the girls (to my disappointment, minus Meg) and I went to Lily’s Paradise to get ready. I had no idea what to wear. I hated dresses and had never tried wearing a suit before. I wasn’t sure if they would affect my sensory issues so I never tried them. 

   I also never tried them because, if my mom ever found me wearing a suit, she would get mad and I didn’t want to deal with that. But this was the afterlife and my mom couldn’t tell me what to do anymore. So I decided it was time to try something new.

   “So, what do you guys want to wear to this?” Lily asked.

   “Do we have to be fancy?” I asked. 

   “You don’t have to if you don’t want to.” Lily said. “But, if you do, it’ll work for the plan.”
   Confused, I asked, “What do you mean?”

   “You see,” Lily said, “When the guys see us in kinda suggestive and sexy outfits, they’ll be too busy looking at us that they’ll mess up. Then we have a better shot at winning if they are distracted.”
   “But I'm gay.” I said. “I don’t like any guys.”

   “Then you can dress to distract Meg.” Lily said.

   I blushed. “It won’t work if she isn't attracted or has no feelings for me.”
   Lily smiled. “It’ll work. Trust me.”
   I took a deep breath. “Fine. But no dresses please. I’m really picky when it comes to picking out dresses.”
   “What do you mean?” Penny asked.

   “I have a birthmark on my shoulder and I was kinda insecure about it when I was alive. So I wanted it covered when I had a dress on so no one made fun of me for it.” I explained. “I also have sensory issues due to possible autism so nothing can touch my neck. I don’t like the pattern to be very chaotic. Something that’s just one color is fine. I also don’t want it to be very long because I might trip over it.”

   “I think we can make that work.” Lily said. 

   So, they picked out a dress for me. I hesitantly tried it on. It was perfect. It was red and had a bit of hot pink at the bottom. It didn’t have any uncomfortable fabrics. It covered my shoulders. It didn’t touch my neck. It was perfect.

   “Thank you so much!” I exclaimed. “It’s perfect!”

   “Keep it if you want.” Penny said. “I’ll never wear it.”

   Once everyone was ready, we headed to the place where the trivia night was being held. It was at a restaurant that I didn’t remember the name of. A lot of creatures were there. I saw some gods and goddesses, some demons, some angels, and other creatures that I didn’t recognize. 

   I saw Meg on the other side of the table and waved. She saw me, blushed, and waved back.

   “Still think she doesn’t have any feelings for you?” Lily whispered in my ear. I elbowed her. 

   My team consisted of Lily, Penny, Angel, me, and a demon woman named Sariah who Lily told me was Bel’s friend Asmodeus’s wife.

   When it started, my team went first. Luckily for us, the first question was a Greek mythology question and I knew it immediately.

   “What god or goddess turned Medusa into a monster in Greek mythology?” The question asked.

   “The answer is Athena.” I said. It was right.

   “Good job.” Lily said. 

   “Thank you.” I said. “Mythology has always been interesting to me. So I got a lot of books about Greek mythology, Norse mythology, and some Egyptian mythology.”

   “That’ll be helpful for this.” Lily said.

   I looked at Meg and she had a look on her face. She looked so pretty that I couldn’t help but blush. She had a more masculine outfit today. She was wearing a button up white shirt and black dress pants. I didn’t know what shoes she had on because I couldn’t see them because of the table.

   Meg caught me looking at her and winked. I blushed even harder.

   “Don’t you dare get distracted now.” Lily warned. “We’re winning.”
   “Sorry.” I shook my head. “Meg’s really hot.”
   “Okay, little lesbian.” Angel said. “Focus. Only a few more questions and then we win. Then you can make out with Meg or something.”

   “I won’t do… that with her.” I started to get flustered. “She might not ever like me like that. She’s probably just messing with me.”

   “Uh huh.” Angel rolled her eyes. “Sure.”
   Soon, the game was over. We had won. I smiled. I had gotten all the mythology questions right. It was fun.

   Suddenly, Meg appeared next to me as I stood up. I blushed. She smiled and said, “Let’s go.”
   Angel winked at me and Lily gave me a smug look. I ignored them and followed Meg.

   The pretty demon held my hand as we walked. I asked, “Um, where are we going?”

   “You’ll see.” She said. Her voice was so beautiful. I could listen to it all day.

   She took us to her house and pinned me against the wall in the living room. My face was red and I was unable to speak. I had never experienced this before. Well, I had never even dated a girl before so this was all new to me.

   “You are so cute when you’re blushing like that.” Meg whispered in my ear. I didn’t say anything because I had no idea how to respond. Meg whispered, “You okay, kitten?”

   I felt like my face got even redder at that nickname. I managed to say, “Y-Yeah. I just… um, I’ve never experienced this before. I haven’t even had my first kiss yet.”

   Meg lifted my chin up so I looked up at her face. “Want to change that?”

   I nodded. I was definitely okay with Meg being my first kiss. “Yes.”

  Meg smiled. Her smile was really pretty. She was really pretty. “Alright then. Let me know if you want to stop. Okay?”

   “Okay.” I said, nervous but excited for what was about to happen.

   I closed my eyes and we kissed. It was amazing. I felt her tail start to curl around my leg. I wrapped my arms around Meg’s neck and she put her hands on my waist.

   Meg asked me, “Is it okay if my tail touches your leg?”

   “Yes,” I said.

   “Good.” Meg smiled. “Shall we continue?”

   I said, “Yes.”

   We continued kissing for a while. But then we heard something. The front door had opened.

   “Shit.” I muttered. “Should we go somewhere else?”

   Meg was quiet for a moment. Then she said, “Sure. Let’s go to my room.”

   I blushed. “Okay.”

   Meg picked me up and carried me to her room. When we got there, I was thrown gently on the bed and Meg sat on my lap.

   “Let’s have some fun.” Meg said, her lips moving to my neck.

In the morning, I woke up to me holding Meg. She was already awake.

   “Good morning.” Meg said. “How did you sleep?”

   “Good.” I said. I looked down and realized I was still in my dress. We must have fallen asleep after we made out the night before.

   Meg kissed my forehead. “You are so cute.”

   I blushed. “No, you are.”

   We laughed a bit and then decided to get up to eat breakfast. Meg told me that I could wear some of her clothes. So I decided to borrow a red hoodie and a pair of black leggings. When I was done changing, I went down the stairs and smelled waffles. 

   I stopped next to Meg. “Waffles?”

   “Waffles.” Meg agreed. “And I have some strawberries, too. There are a few waffles that are done on that plate over there,” Meg pointed to a plate on the counter that had about five waffles on it.

   “Thank you!” I was tempted to kiss her cheek but my anxiety decided not to in case she wouldn’t like it. So I walked over to the waffles and put some on a plate. I also grabbed some strawberries and put them on the plate.

   Meg walked over to the table with a plate and maple syrup. She sat next to me and said, “Forgetting something?” 

   I grabbed the bottle of syrup. “Thank you.”

   Meg smiled. “You’re welcome.”

   We sat in silence as we ate for a while. When we were done, Meg asked, “Can I ask you something?”

   “Sure.” I replied. “What is it?”

   “Do you have feelings for me?” Meg asked.

   I froze, not sure how to answer it. In the end, I said, “I don’t know. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. I don’t know what my feelings are. I know I like you. But in love? I don’t know.”

   Meg just nodded. “Okay.”

   “Are you mad?” I asked, getting worried. “I’m sorry if that upset you. I-I thought I should be honest.”

   “I’m not upset.” Meg reassured me. “It’s okay. We don’t have to date or anything. We can just continue as we are.” She paused. “With some possible make out sessions like that sometimes. Only if you want to. Last night was fun.”

   I blushed and muttered, “Yeah, it was. I never did anything like that before. You were my first kiss.”

   “Well,” Meg smiled. “I say you did great for your first time.”

   I smiled a bit and started to fidget with my fingers. “Thank you.”

   We finished eating and I helped Meg with the dishes. Then I went home. I was happy. I felt like everything would be okay in the end.

Chapter Text

I went to work at the Hello Desk after that. Half the group wasn’t there because, from what Judy told me, they got drunk and were hungover. The members that were there were Judy, Sharkie, and Lily.

   “How was last night for you guys?” I asked them. “After the trivia game.”

   “Bel and I had some adult fun.” Lily said. “Then we drank and passed out. I felt good enough to be here today. Bel is still recovering.”

   “I played some games with Loki.” Sharkie said.

   “What happened with that?” I asked, remembering Loki was the trickster god in Norse mythology.

   “He cheated and I bit.” Sharkie replied. “It was fun.”
   “I didn’t go to the trivia night.” Judy said. “I just had a peaceful night with my husband.”

   “What did you do, Charlie?” Lily asked. “It looked like Meg dragged you out of there really fast.”

   I blushed. “Well, I may or may not have had my first kiss last night. And my first ever make out session.”

   “Aw!” Lily exclaimed. “That’s amazing. Did anything else happen?”

   Sharkie gagged. “Please, no details.”

   I chuckled. “We didn’t have sex. I’m not ready for that. We agreed the next day that we would stay as friends unless feelings developed.” I felt my face turn a bit red. “But we did agree that there may be more make out sessions in the future.”
   “That’s good.” Lily said. “Looks like you will have some more fun in the future.”

   “We aren’t dating.” I said. “It’s just a… friends with benefits kind of thing.”

   “Still,” Lily said. “Good for you. At least you’re happy. Right?”

   I smiled. “I am.”

   Lily smiled back. “That’s all that matters.”

   Most of the day was peaceful until I heard a familiar voice from Judy’s desk. I looked over and saw a familiar face. 

   “I was a good mom.” She said, “I don’t deserve to be here.” 

   Judy was about to say something when I walked over. “Judy,” I said, “I got this one.”

   “You sure?” Judy asked. She looked at the file for the woman and then looked at me. She took a deep breath and said, “Alright. We’re here if you need anything.”

   I looked at the woman and said, “Hey, Mom.”

   “Caitlyn,” My mom said. “What are you doing here? Did you get sent here, too? I wouldn’t be surprised. You weren’t a great daughter. I mean, trying to fake mental illnesses? That’s just wrong.”

   “I wasn’t faking.” I said. “I was mentally ill. I was stuck in my own brain because of all the shit I had to deal with in life. Here’s a list of stuff you’re aware of: Uncle Ray going to the hospital for the first time, almost losing everyone in my friend group in 7th grade, Grandma’s stroke in 6th grade. Here’s the stuff you aren’t aware of: My sexuality and gender crisis, my first crush ghosting me, me being afraid to have a crush because of that.”

   “You aren’t gay or any other gender.” My mom said. “You’re too young to know.”

   “I’m old enough to know you’re a bitch.” I said. I could hear Sharkie going “OOOOH!” in the background. I added, “Also, I am a lesbian. I like girls. I have never and will never be attracted to guys.”

   “I am not a bitch.” My mom said, “You’re just an ungrateful little brat who’s confused. I raised you better than that. I raised you to be respectful. If it weren’t for me and what I did, you would have died as a baby.”

   “I’m not a brat.” I said. “Also, taking care of me as a baby is something you have to do as a parent. I know I was a lot as a baby because of my brain bullshit. But that doesn’t give you the right to be a shit parent.”

   “I was not a shit parent.” My mom protested.

   “If I may,” Judy said, “I have your file here, Dianna, and you were a bad parent. In addition to the shit that Charlie here listed, you treated both your kids differently. You basically gave most of the attention to Charlie and not her twin.”
   “I did not enjoy that a lot.” I told my mom. “I would have rather enjoyed being left to be independent. Yes, my dumb brain wouldn’t have allowed it most of the time due to being trapped in a daydream a lot of the time. Daydreaming also didn’t let me process emotions much. But it would have helped. Mars also told me that he wanted some of the attention I got from you and Grandma. It’s why we fought sometimes. You caused us to fight because one of us got more attention because of something I had no say in. It made me feel different and I hated that. I just wanted to be treated like a normal person.”

   “You weren’t normal.” My mom said, “You never were.”
   “Maybe.” I said. “But I would have liked to pretend I was. That’s one of the reasons I developed Maladaptive Daydreaming. I wanted to be normal and, in the world I created in my mind, I was normal. At least, by the rules of the world I made, I was normal. But it took until I died to realize being normal is okay. I mean, I learned I am autistic and possibly have ADHD, too. So, normal would never happen.” 

   “You weren’t autistic,” My mom said. “Or have ADHD.”

   “Yes, I was.” I said. “Everyone in my friend group when I was alive agreed. I mean, some of my special interests were writing and mythology. I had sensory issues. I was uncomfortable at loud sounds. I stimmed by tapping my fingers. For the ADHD, I was forgetful a lot —although that could have been because of my Maladaptive Daydreaming and my hydrocephalus. I had problems paying attention —but, again, my Maladaptive daydreaming could also cause this. I fidgeted a lot. I acted without thinking sometimes. Do you want me to keep going or do you get the idea?”

   “But you acted fine.” MY mom said, “You didn’t seem mentally ill.”

   “I didn’t.” I agreed. “But that’s because I hid it. Whenever I tried to ask for therapy, you always compared me to other kids at the school you worked at. You said I was fine and that ‘other people have it worse.’ That didn’t help. So, I hid it from. Because you ignored my problems, I developed a fear that no one would care if I told them I was struggling. You didn’t, so why would anyone? What you said made me afraid to tell people I’m struggling or how I really feel. It took my death to unlearn all that. I’m still trying to unlearn all that. But I now have a support system and people who actually care. They’ve helped me and will continue to help me because that’s what friends and people who actually care are supposed to do. You’re lucky I didn’t kill myself back then because of all this shit. Also, I was depressed and had anxiety. You didn’t help with it when I picked at my own skin and nails. Therapy would have helped me but you refused to believe me. I hate you because of that.”

   I took a deep breath, trying to calm down. I then told my mom, “Knowing all of that, I hope you become a better person from your time here. You’re my mom and I still somehow care. If you do get reincarnated, be a better person. Trust your kids when they say they are struggling. If not, you’ll just end up with either a dead kid or the kid cutting contact with you.”

   My mom looked upset. It looked like she was about to say something, but I pulled the lever to the trapdoor. My shitty mom fell to her level.

   I let go of it and realized I was shaking. Judy hugged me. The southern woman said, “You did good, kid. I’m proud of you.” 

   “Thanks.” I said. “It felt good telling her what I felt.”

   “Aw, man!” Sharkie groaned. “Why did you pull the lever? I was going to use my chainsaw on her!”

   “You could go to her level, Sharkie.” Lily suggested. “I’m sure the employees there would enjoy that. Only if Charlie is okay with it though.”

   I shrugged. “Go ahead. I don’t care.”
   Sharkie smiled and ran to the trapdoor. “Pull the lever.”
   “Okay,” I pulled it and Sharkie went down to my mom’s level.

   “Are you okay, sweetie?” Judy asked. “You can go now if you want.”

   “Actually, I might do that.” I said. I got out my phone and texted Meg.

   Can I come over? I asked. Just saw my mom and it was a lot. Is it okay if we hang out for a bit?

   Meg texted back almost immediately. You can come over anytime, kitten. I read the nickname and blushed, remembering the night before. Meg texted again and said, You can come over anytime you want. You don’t have to ask.

   Thanks. I texted back. Turning to Lily and Judy, I said, “I’m going to go to Meg’s. Bye.”
   “Have fun.” Lily said. I nodded and left the Hellp Desk.

I knocked on the door when I got to Meg’s house. She was in a white shirt and a red and black flannel. She also wore jeans and black boots that looked really comfortable.

   “Hey,” I said, my voice filled with emotion. I felt fine after I made my mom go down to her level. But, for some reason, unloading all the shit I felt about my mom to her made me feel emotional now.

   “Are you okay?” Meg asked, her voice filled with concern. I shook my head and my demon friend told me to go inside. We sat on the couch and Meg held me as I cried. When I was done, I told Meg what happened.

   “It felt good telling Mom all that.” I said, wiping away the tears. “But it was a lot. I hoped she would be a better person after I died. But I was wrong.”

   “You can’t force people to change.” Meg said. “You did what you could. She knows what she did now. She knows now what to change if she wants to be a better person.”

   I cuddled closer to Meg. “I wish I had better parents. My dad was the best I had and yet I barely saw him.”

   “You have him.” Meg said. “That’s good enough.”

   “I guess.” I mumbled. 

   We stayed cuddling on the couch for a while. Then I realized I should check on my brother. 

   “Shit.” I muttered.

   “What?” Meg asked. 

   “I just remembered I left my brother at my grandpas’.” I said. “I should probably check in on him.”

   “Okay.” Meg said. “Go ahead. If you need anything, let me know.”

   “Alright.” I said, getting up from the couch. 

   Then I left and went to Grandpa’s Paradise. 

   When I got there, I was greeted with Ryan tackling me and giving me a big hug. “Hi, big sis!”
   “Hey, buddy.” I said. “Sorry I just left you here. I got busy.”
   “I don’t mind.” Ryan said. “It was fun hanging out with Grandpa Bill and Grandpa Richard.”
   I looked at Grandpa. “Grandpa Richard?”

   My grandpa shrugged. “He insisted. But I’m fine with having another grandchild even though he’s not technically related to me.”

   Papa walked into the room. He asked me, “Kiddo, are you okay?”

   I started fidgeting with my fingers. “Not really.” 

   Grandpa looked at me with concern and gestured for me to sit down on the couch. “What’s wrong?”
   “Can I stay?” Ryan asked. “I can go if you want.”

   I thought for a moment. “You can stay.”

   “What’s wrong, Charlie?” Papa asked me.

   “I saw Mom at the Hellp Desk.” I said.

   “Really?” Grandpa sounded shocked. “I honestly thought that your grandma would go before her. I’m shocked.”
   “Yeah,” I said. “She said some… not nice stuff.”
   “What did my daughter say?” Grandpa asked in a serious tone.

   Ryan looked at him. “I didn’t know you could be this serious.”
   “Oh, he can be.” Papa said. “It’s kinda scary. Same with my son.”

   I then explained to them what my mom said. With every second, my grandpa looked angrier. When I was done, he stood up.

   “Would it be possible for me to have… a little chat with Dianna?” He asked.

   “Maybe.” I said, getting a little nervous for whoever will see what he does to my mom. “I’ll see what I can do.”

   “Good.” Grandpa said. “Let me know.”

   I stood up and said, “I should get going. I’m tired and it’s been a long day.”

   “Okay.” Grandpa said. “Let me know about that. I really want to talk to my daughter.”

   Then, I left with my brother. I made food and then fell asleep.

Chapter Text

In the morning, I went back to work. Luckily, that day was peaceful and I didn’t see any more family members that had recently died. 

   When the day was over, I went over to Meg’s house. Nixie was there and we all played some video games. When Nixie left, Meg and I kissed a few times. When we were done, I went home. 

   In the morning, I dropped Ryan off at school and went to work. Most of the day was nice. Until I saw someone I knew.

   “Hey, Lyla.” I said. “I would say I’m surprised to see you here in Hell, but I’m not.”

   “I'm not supposed to be here.” The soul, Lyla, said. 

   “You are.” I said. “You were transphobic and an asshole.”

   “Well, people can’t just change their gender.” Lyla said. “We aren’t frogs. We are people. That’s not possible. Whoever thinks they’re the opposite gender are crazy and need to be put into a mental asylum.”

   “What the fuck?” I heard Judy ask. She walked over and she said, “Are you crazy? Being trans or gay doesn’t mean you’re mentally ill. While someone can be trans and have a mental illness, being trans isn’t a mental illness. They are perfectly fine the way they are.”

   “Also,” I told Lyla, “People can change their gender with surgery. My twin recently got top surgery and I’m proud of him. My twin is happy and I’m happy for him. He also is taking testosterone so now he has a more masculine face and voice.”

   “Your twin is a girl.” Lyla said. “She always is and always will be a girl.”

   “Maybe his DNA will say he’s a girl,” I said, “But the people who care will know who he really is. You are not one of those people. You are a bitch. Also, off topic of LGBTQ+ people, you weren’t a good person in general. When we were friends as kids, you would hang out with one twin and ignore the other. So that’s why we were friends on and off during elementary school. We eventually realized you aren’t a good person and decided to stop trying to be your friend.”

   “Well, you were always a freak.” Lyla said. “I mean, you were gay from what I heard. You were a theater kid. You always talked about your stories. No sane person would talk that much about something that isn’t real.”

   “So you’re mad I did stuff I enjoyed?” I asked. “That’s dumb. I liked doing theater. I liked making stories. I didn’t talk about them all the time, but I did like telling people about it. Also, I do like girls. Not you though. You have never and will never be my type.” Lyla opened her mouth and tried to say something. But I said, “See you never, bitch.” 

   I then sent her to the level she had to go to. 

   “She was a bitch.” Judy said. “Why did you ever be friends with her?”

   “I was a kid and dumb.” I said. “I didn’t realize she wasn’t a good person back then. As I got older, I realized what kind of person she really was and stopped trying to be friends with her. I wasn’t going to try to be friends with someone like that.”

   “Good for you.” Judy said. “Do you want to take a break or are you okay with staying here?”

   “I’ll stay here.” I said.

   “Alright.” Judy said. Then she walked back over to her desk and started talking to the souls there.

   After a while, I started to get bored. But my boredom ended when I decided to watch MortalTube.

   I looked up my stepmom’s name. I saw something I did not expect. 

   “Holy shit.” I muttered.

   “What?” Lily asked. “What happened?”
   “Denise got caught.” I said, still in shock.

   “Who’s Denise?” Sharkie asked.

   “My stepmom.” I said. “The one who killed me and my brother.”

   “Oh shit.” Sharkie said. “Are you okay?”

   “I… I never thought…” I tried to speak but I didn’t have the words. So, I stood up and went into the break room. I leaned against a wall. Relief washed over me. 

   Finally, I thought. She can’t hurt anyone anymore. We’re free.

   I didn’t know how long I sat on the floor. Eventually, Meg walked in.

   “Hey,” Meg said. “Are you okay?”

   “Yeah,” I said. “Yeah. I’m okay. I just saw on MortalTube that my stepmom got caught and is going to jail.”

   “Damn.” Meg said. “Are you okay?”
   “I’m relieved.” I finally said after a minute. “She finally won’t be able to hurt anyone anymore. Now I just need to wait until she’s here to get my own justice.”

   “That’s good.” Meg said. “Are you going to go home now or are you going to stay?”
   “I’m going to go home.” I said. 

   “Want me to come with you?” Meg asked. 

   I thought about it. I decided that I didn’t want to be alone at the moment so I agreed and we went to my Paradise house. When we got inside, I laid on the couch.

   “Want some food?” Meg asked me. “I can make something.”

   “Waffles please.” I muttered, burying my face in the pillow on the couch.

   “Alright.” Meg said, walking into the kitchen. 

   After a few minutes, I decided to get moving and changed clothes. I showered and put a purple hoodie and jeans on. I had socks on and didn’t feel like putting on shoes. I walked into the kitchen. The food smelled good.

    “So, are you sure you’re okay after that?” Meg asked. 

   I was silent for a moment. Then I muttered, “I don’t know. I don’t know how I feel about what just happened.”

   “That’s okay.” Meg said. “Can I ask why?”

   “I mean,” I said, “I’m happy she got what she deserved in the end. She’s in jail now and will face consequences for those actions. But I’m upset that she did what she did. I know some stuff that she did that my little siblings don’t know. If they ever find out about those things, how will they react? I don’t know how to explain to my siblings that she’s now in jail and she cheated on my dad.”

   “That’s fair.” Meg said. “Where is Ryan by the way?” 

   “I think he’s at school.” I said. “He doesn’t know yet.”
   “Will you tell him she’s in jail?” Meg asked.

   “Should I?” I asked in return. 

   “It’s up to you.” Meg said. “You’re taking care of the kid. You get to decide if you tell him or not.”

   After thinking about it for a moment, I asked Meg, “Can you be with me when I tell him? I feel comfortable with you and you being there might make it easier to say.” I paused, my brain making me feel anxious about this. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. I’m just wondering.”

   Meg grabbed my hand. “I’ll stay if you want me to stay.”
   I blushed and smiled. “Thank you.”

   “Is there anything else on your mind?” Meg asked.

   “I wish she wasn’t such a terrible person.” I said. “I wish she never did those things to my family. I hate her so much for that. I wish my siblings had a good mom instead of her.”

   “You can’t change who she is.” Meg said. “What you can do is be there for your family. Well, the family members you have in the afterlife. When the others arrive, you can be there for them. But remember to take time for yourself, too.”

   “I will,” I said. “thanks.”

   Meg stayed with me for a while until it was time for Ryan to come home from school. I decided to tell him what happened.

   “How was your day, buddy?” I asked my brother.

   “It was good.” Ryan said. “We started using clay in art class. It’s fun. But I don’t like how the clay gets on my hands.”

   “Yeah, I don’t like it either.” I said. “But it’ll be worth it in the end.”

   Ryan nodded. “Are you okay? You look upset.”

   I took a deep breath. “Ryan, can you sit down? We need to talk about something.”

   “Okay?” Ryan sounded confused but he sat down next to me. “What’s wrong?”

   Meg was staying in my room. I didn’t want her to go but I also thought my brother and I should talk about this alone. Meg was there if I needed comfort afterwards.

   “Your mom is now in jail.” I finally said. 

   “What?” Ryan looked sad. He added quietly, “I thought she would change after she…”

   I hugged him. “I know, bud. I know. I thought so, too. But she did a lot of bad things in her life. Do you want to know some of it, or do you want to wait?”

   “I already know she killed us.” Ryan said. “What else did she do?”

   I was silent for a moment. Then I muttered, “She cheated on Dad a few times. And more stuff to me and my twin but I’m not ready to say anything yet.”

   Ryan nodded. We were silent for a few minutes. We just sat there and held each other. Finally, Ryan said, “She deserves it. I know it might be mean to say because she is my mom. But…”

   “I know, buddy.” I said. “It’s okay.”

   Ryan then went to his room after that. Meg came back down.

   “Did it go well?” The demon asked.

   “I think so.” I said. 

   Meg smiled. “Good.”

   Meg stayed over for dinner. Once that was done, she left and I went into my basement. I had a secret door that led to a secret library. It had all my favorite books (which were a lot). I found a corner with stuffed animals. I went into the pile with my computer. I stayed there and wrote one of my stories until I fell asleep in the pile.

Chapter Text

The next day, I decided to visit the Underworld to chat with Hades and Persephone. We had been texting on and off ever since they asked me to make a version of the Hellp Desk in the Underworld. I had been so busy I hadn’t done any work there. But, luckily, Hades and Persephone had hired other people to work there while I was gone. 

   “Hey,” I said. “How has it been here?”
   “Pretty nice.” Persephone said. “Most of the souls have been nice. Most have been asking about their families. So, it’s been nice.”
   “Good.” I said.

   “How have you been?” Hades asked. “It’s been a while since you came here.”

   “It’s been chaotic.” I said. Then, I explained everything that had happened since I was last there.

   “Damn.” Hades said. “Are you okay? You don’t have to work here today if you don’t want to.”

   “I do.” I said. “It’ll be a nice distraction. Also, I haven’t worked here since you suggested it. So, I wanted to actually do something here. Also, since you hired other people to work here while I was gone, I could make some new friends.”

   Persephone smiled. “Good point. Alright, go find a desk and get to work.”
    I did and met some people from the Celtic area of the Afterlife. A fae lady was next to me. Her name was Violet. She was really nice.

   When I was done there, I went over to the Hellp Desk. I went to my desk and decided to write.

   “What are you doing?” Lily asked.

   “Writing.” I said, focusing on writing.

   “You okay?” Lily asked.

   “One second.” I muttered. I finished the chapter and looked up. “Okay, done. What’s up?”

   “Nothing. I was just wondering what you were doing.” Lily said. “I didn’t think you would come to work today after what happened yesterday.”

   “I’m okay.” I said. “Ryan knows what she did and seemed okay. I’m just writing one of my stories instead of working. Motivation hit yesterday when I got home and I’ve written about 7 chapters in this story.”

   “You’re a writer?” Lily asked. “Cool. What do you write about?”

   “A lot of stuff.” I said. “This one is about a wolf named Sunny and her family trying to defeat an evil wolf who wants to destroy the world. It’s also gay. I started this story in 4th grade and it’s evolved a lot since then. I love it. I can’t wait to see what happens next. I have an idea but that may change.”

   “Cool.” Lily said. “When you’re done, I want to read it.”
   “Really?” I asked.

   Lily nodded. “Yeah. It looks interesting.”
   “Thanks.” I said. “By the way, it will most likely be a trilogy. This is book 1 and it’s halfway done. I’ve started book 2 and have an idea for book 3. You might have to wait a bit.”

   “That sounds great.” Lily said. “More for me to read when it’s done.”

   I smiled. “Good.”

   “When did you decide to be a writer?” Lily asked.

   “I made my first story in 4th grade. After that, I always liked making stories. But most of the stories came from my daydream world. It was an escape from the not great stuff that happened in my life. It wasn’t a great coping skill, but the daydreams helped me create the stories. I don’t do that anymore, but the stories are still in my head.” I explained.

   “Interesting.” Lily said. She looked over at her desk. “Have fun with that. I need to get back to work.”
   Sharkie then walked over. “You’re a writer? Will this story have any… sticky scenes?”

   “No, not this one.” I said. “Even if it did, I would just skip to the next day since I’ve never had sex before. So, if you want to read this one, you can when it’s done.”

   “Cool. I heard you talking to Lily about the story you’re making and it seems interesting. When it’s published, give me a copy please.” Sharkie said.

   “Will do.” I said.

   I continued writing until I saw Meg. She wore a white shirt, a black leather jacket, and ripped jeans. She looked really cool.

   “Hey, Meg.” I said. “How are you?”

   Meg smiled. “Hey, Charlie. I’m good. How are you? What are you doing?”

   “I’m writing one of my stories.” I said. I then explained to her about the story and showed her some drawings I made on my phone of one of my favorite characters in it. When I was done explaining, I asked, “What do you think?”

   “It sounds really cool.” Meg said. “You’re really good at drawing.”
   I blushed, a bit embarrassed. “Thank you. Digital art is easier for me.I would never be able to make stuff like this on paper.”

   “It’s really good.” Meg said. “Can you send me a picture of one of them? I have an idea.”

   “What idea?” I asked.

   Meg smiled. “It’s a surprise.”

   “Okay?” I was a bit confused but I sent her a picture of my character Sunny. She was my favorite character that I’ve ever made. She was the first character I ever made, so she was special to me. 

   “Thanks.” Meg said. “I have to go. I’m going to train with Bel today.”
   “Nice.” I said. “Be careful.”

   Meg nodded and left.

Chapter Text

After Meg left, anxiety started to fill my mind. Would she be ok? What if something bad happened to her? What if she got hurt? What if…

   I shook my head. I stood up and left the Hellp Desk. 

   To get my mind off of Meg, I decided to visit the Rainbow Bridge. I had heard from Lily and the others that it was a place where pets go when they die. So, I decided to see what animals there were. 

   When I got there, I was amazed. I saw an animal cafe and so. Many. Animals!

   I looked around and saw a familiar dog. It was a chocolate Labrador with gray fur on his muzzle. He ran over to me and barked happily. I remembered who it was.

   I ran over to the dog and he licked my face happily. I laughed. “Hey, Rockie! I missed you, buddy! How are you, old man?”

   The dog, Rockie, barked again. Rockie was my mom’s friend’s dog. Whenever I went over to her house, Rockie would always listen to me when I told him to do tricks but not when my twin did. We were close. I considered him to be my dog. 

   I smiled and petted his fur. I was glad he was here. I had assumed he would die before I did since he was an old dog. But, since time moved differently in the Afterlife and I hadn’t been to the Rainbow Bridge before, Rockie could have died before me and I had never noticed until now.

   I grabbed his leash and stood up. “Let’s go, Rockie. You’re coming home with me.”

   Rockie barked in agreement and followed me home. 

   The next few days weren’t as stressful as I originally thought. I thought that, with Meg leaving to do something dangerous, I would be more anxious. But, with Rockie by my side, he helped me whenever I was feeling anxious.

   Whenever he noticed I wasn’t okay, the old dog walked over to me and put his paw on my leg. Another thing he did to distract me from my anxious thoughts was by bringing a ball over to me so I would be forced to play fetch with him. 

   Sometimes I would be a bit annoyed. But I was eventually grateful for it. I was doing something a bit productive instead of sinking into negative thoughts.

   As the days passed, I got more and more worried. I hoped everything would be okay. Lily even visited me at one point and told me that missions like this happened all the time and most of them went fine. It was rare for something to go wrong.

   I wanted to believe her since she had been in the afterlife longer than I had. But that didn’t help the almost constant anxious feeling in my gut. I had a very bad feeling something was going to go wrong. The problem was that I had no idea what it would be or when it would happen.

   After another night of anxious thought, I tried to take some deep breaths. Rockie was sleeping next to me on the bed so I ran my hand through his fur.

   Everything is going to be okay. I thought. Nothing bad is going to happen. Meg and Bel are going to be fine. Lily said these missions usually take some time and they don’t always end badly. So, I shouldn’t worry… but why is this anxious feeling not going away?

   After two weeks of no updates from Bel, Lily, or Meg, I started getting very worried. At one point, I had an anxiety attack at the Help Desk. Lily made me go home after that and banned me from work until I felt better. I tried to protest but I eventually gave in. I knew she was just trying to help me. 

   So, I tried to do stuff that would help me relax and not think about anything negative. I got some books about sewing from the Universal Library and started making little plushies. At first, they didn’t look that bad. The first one was a tiny toast plushie and I named it Little Toast. I then made a bat named Waffle. I was working on a third tiny plushie when I got a call.

   I quickly reached for my phone and I saw who it was. It was Lily. I immediately answered the phone. “Lily? Hey. What’s going on?”

   “The mission is over.” Lily said. But her tone didn’t sound happy.

   “What’s wrong?” I asked. I started getting worried. Rockie, sensing that something was wrong, nuzzled his head into my hand.

   Lily then told me something awful. I dropped the phone and ran out of my Paradise to Meg’s house; Lily’s words echoing in my head.

   “Meg got seriously hurt. We don’t know if she’ll make it.”

Chapter Text

I ran as fast as I could to Meg’s house. Lily’s words kept repeating in my head but I tried to ignore it and focus on getting to the house.

   Part of me was confused why I cared so much. We hadn’t known each other for very long. So why did I care so much?

   I’m just concerned because she’s my friend. I told myself. I think she’s my best friend here so that’s why I care… right?

   I reached her house and stopped running, trying to catch my breath. I knocked on the door and saw Mor, Meg’s mom.

   “Where is she? Is she okay?” I immediately asked. “Lily told me that she got hurt.”

   “She’s going to be okay.” Mor said. “The healers are helping her right now. She may have some scars but it could be worse.”

   I nodded. “Yeah…”

   She could be dead… a voice in my head said.

   Mor let me come inside and I saw Zornoth and Bel sitting on the couch. Bel looked over at me and stood up. He walked over to me and gave me a sad smile.

   “Hey.” The tall demon prince said.

   “Hey…” I replied. “What happened?”

   “Some monsters from another realm appeared and attacked us.” Bel said. “We were trying to fix the rift when some creatures came out of it and attacked. Meg did her best but got badly hurt. But, thankfully, she should make a full recovery. But…” Bel paused.

   “What?” I asked. “What is it?”

   “She probably won’t be able to work with my legion anymore.” Bel finally said. “Her injuries were too severe and I don’t want her to get too injured. So I’m going to ask Lucifer to transfer her to a safe job. I don’t know what he’ll say, but I hope Meg just understands that this is for her safety.”

   I stood there, trying to process everything Bel had told me. 

   Bel put a hand on my shoulder. “You can visit her. I know you two are close. Her room is upstairs next to the stairs.”

   I nodded and went to the bedroom. I saw Meg laying there. The healers must have just left since I didn’t see them there. I found a chair and moved it so I could sit down next to Meg. Her arms were covered in bandages and there were probably more under the blanket. I hoped it wasn’t as bad as it looked. 

   Tears formed in my eyes. I didn’t understand why I was feeling so emotional right now. We were just friends. Why was I so scared she wouldn’t survive? Why did I feel like this about her? What was this feeling? 

   I held Meg’s hand gently. I was never religious in life or in the afterlife but I prayed to the Universe that it would let Meg live. She didn’t deserve to die like this. She deserved to live.

   I must have fallen asleep at some point because I opened my eyes and felt something on my head. I looked up and saw Meg. She was awake.

   “Hey, Charlie.” Meg said.

   I immediately started crying.

Chapter Text

It took a while for Meg to be completely okay. She had many scars on her arms and legs from the creature that attacked her. Part of me was worried she would hate her scars but she told me otherwise.

   “These scars are a mark that I did something good.” Meg told me one day. “They are a mark that shows I protected my friends. I don’t care if I have scars or not. As long as my friends are okay, then I’m okay.”

   Bel eventually told Meg that she would have to work somewhere else. She surprisingly took it well. It looked to me that she expected this to happen. So, until Lucifer thought of a better job for her, Meg would be working at the Hellp Desk with me. 

   At first, it felt weird working with her since I wasn’t used to it. I had gotten used to my routine of seeing the normal Hellp Desk crew everyday. Seeing Meg all the time felt… weird. Wrong.

   I shook my head. This was for a good reason. Meg would be safer here. 

   Eventually, Lucifer decided Meg should work on one of the levels. She decided to work on level 7. When Meg started working there, I noticed she seemed much happier. That made me happy. I was glad she found something she enjoyed doing that wasn’t as dangerous as working with Bel’s legions.

   But, as time went on, I started to notice my feelings for Meg change. I didn’t start to hate her. It was something else. Something I was scared of happening.

   I was falling in love with her.

   I talked to my grandpas about this once I realized and learned from their love stories that I was in fact falling in love with Meg.

   Part of me was scared. What if she didn’t feel the same? What if she does feel the same but something terrible immediately happens?

   I tried to stay positive but I was still scared. There was still so much from my mortal life that I hadn’t told her. I knew I made many mistakes in my mortal life. Would she judge me? I was trying to do better in my afterlife. But what if…

   I took a deep breath, trying to calm down. I couldn’t constantly think of “what ifs.” That wasn’t a good way to live. I tried to focus on work but my stupid anxious brain kept distracting me. Eventually, Lily noticed what was going on and took me into the break room to talk.

   After hesitating, I eventually told her what I was feeling. When I was done, Lily reacted in a way I didn’t expect.

   “Yes!” She exclaimed. “Finally!”

   “Huh?” I was very confused.

   “No offense, but I think everyone at the Hellp Desk realized how you felt about Meg.” Lily said. “You weren’t very subtle.”

   “Damn it…” I mumbled.

   Lily chuckled. “Don’t worry about it. It’s okay. We aren’t upset.”

   “What do I do?” I asked. “I… I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way about anyone before. I… I don’t know what to do…”

   Lily smiled softly and put a hand on my shoulder. “It’s okay. Just do it when you feel ready. Don’t rush it. Everything is going to be okay. You’ll see.”

   With that, I felt a bit better. But I was still nervous. I was still worried about what could happen if my confession went badly. But I looked at my friends at the Hellp Desk and knew that, if it did go badly, I would have my friends by my side as a good support system. 

   I looked at a soul as they walked up to my desk and smiled, ready to take on whatever the rest of my afterlife brought.

Chapter Text

The next soul that came to my desk I recognized immediately.

   “Hey, Debbie.” I told her. 

   “What am I doing here? I didn’t do anything wrong!” Debbie said.

   “Nothing wrong?” I laughed coldly. “No, you did. Here is a list.” I cleared my throat. “You let someone bring a knife into rehearsal, allowed inappropriate touching to happen backstage, let junior high school kids join a high school musical that was inappropriate, didn’t report any bullying to the dean, and you didn’t deal with any issues that were going on while you were supposed to be watching us. There is probably much more but that’s just the stuff I know happened during drama club while I was there. I haven’t even touched your file yet.”

   “It’s not my fault.” Debbie tried to protest 

   “No, it is.” I said. “You allowed kids to get harassed and bullied. You didn’t do your job as an adult and helped when someone in the club was struggling. You just ignored it. When a cast member’s parents caused a scene that one day, you were more worried about your job as the director than helping us. I saw at least three people crying because of that incident. I was shaking because of that incident.”

   “Maybe if that parent just-“ Debbie started.

   “No.” I interrupted. “If you had just done your job and actually dealt with the issues in the club, you wouldn’t have gotten fired and sued. You are going to level 3 for what you did. Maybe you will eventually learn from your mistakes enough to reincarnate but I’m not sure. Your daughter may join you eventually when she dies but we will just have to wait and see.”

   With that, Debbie reluctantly left and went down the stairs to her level. I sat down and sighed, happy that there would finally be justice for what happened back then.

   “Damn.” Lily said. I looked up and saw her next to me. “Did that really happen?”

   “Yep.” I said. “Drama club during my junior year of high school was a mess. We usually do two shows a year but, because of those incidents, the director was fired and we didn’t have a second show. But we got a new director the next year so that was fine. I finally got a good role for my last year of high school so it wasn’t too bad.”

   “Nice.” Lily said. “I’m glad that the old director isn’t able to hurt anyone anymore.”

   “Agreed.” I said, looking back at the staircase that Debbie disappeared down. “Me too.”

   The rest of the day went by as normal. It was a good distraction to my messy feelings. When I went home later that day, I laid down and sighed. 

   My mind wandered to my time during drama club in high school. It was fun. I made a lot of friends there. There was a lot of drama though. When my junior year of high school ended, I was glad that it was over so I wouldn’t have to deal with so much drama since most of the people who caused the drama graduated and wouldn’t be there the next year.

   I looked at my room and saw the posters of some musicals I liked. I smiled. Even though the drama club was kinda a disaster, I still had fun and I still loved theater. No amount of actual drama would change that. 

Chapter Text

I was in my Paradise house when I heard a knock at the door. I walked over and opened it to see Meg holding a box.

   “Hey.” I said. “What’s that?”

   “It’s a surprise.” Meg replied. “Can I come in?”

   I nodded and she entered my house. We sat down on the couch together. I asked, “So what's in the box?”

   Meg handed it to me. “Here. Open it.”

   I did what she asked and I gasped.

   It was a wolf plushie. It had a yellow body, white belly and paws, green eyes, and a scar-looking mark on its back left leg. It looked exactly like my first oc.

   “Meg…” I whispered. “You remembered…”

   Meg smiled. “Yeah. I heard you always wanted to make this character a plushie and, since you’ve been helping me ever since I got hurt, it’s the least I can do for everything you’ve done to help me. Think of it as a little thank you gift.”

   I put it down and hugged Meg. “Thank you! I love it!”

   I love you. A voice in my head added. I would have said it out loud but I was scared of how she would react if I did confess. So, that part stayed in my head.

   “You’re welcome.” Meg replied, hugging me back. 

   After a few moments, I moved away from the hug and put the plushie on my bed. Then I went back over to Meg. I asked, “Did you make the plushie yourself?”

   Meg nodded. “Yeah. I’ve been practicing sewing recently. I found a good template for a wolf plushie and remembered your wolf oc and decided to try to make it.”

   “Well, it looks amazing.” I said. “I made a few plushies too. When I was alive, my art teacher showed me 2 sewing kits and I worked on a few things from those. The first one I made was a little toast plushie and the sat one I made before I died was a little seal with a top hat.”

   “Nice.” Meg said. “Maybe we can work on stuff together. I can show you where I get all my supplies.”

   “Sounds good to me.” I smiled. “I can’t wait.”

   So, for the next few days, Meg and I made some plushies and other sewing projects together. It was fun. I felt like my feelings for Meg grew a bit stronger as we spent more time together. 

   One day, I went to the Hellp Desk and got to work. As I got there, the group was talking. I went over to them and they immediately became quiet.

   “What’s going on?” I asked, confused.

   Lily looked at the group and then at me. “Are you okay today?”

   “Yeah. Why?” I asked. “I’m fine. Did something happen?”

   Lily took a deep breath. “Remember your stepmom?”

   I nodded.

   “She’s dead.” Lily said. “And she’s in Hell now.”

Chapter Text

I started to panic slightly, remembering how I died. It was terrible. I was so scared. Panic and anxiety rose in my chest.

   Then I felt a hand on my shoulder. I look up and see Meg.

   “It’s going to be okay.” The beautiful demon said. “We will be here so she can’t hurt you.”

   “Yeah.” Sharkie said. “We’ll kick her ass if she even tries.”

   I chuckled at that. “Thanks, guys. You guys are awesome friends.”

   Lily smiled. “Any time, kiddo. So, do you want anything to kick her ass with? Sharkie has a metal bat you can borrow.”

   “Or a chainsaw!” Sharkie added.

   I shook my head. “Not right now. I have a better idea.”

   I took a dagger from my desk. Denise had killed me by cutting my throat open. So, what would be a better punishment than doing what she did to me?

   She then appeared at my desk.

   “Hello, bitch.” I said with a smile.

   “Caitlyn, what are you doing here?” Denise asked. “Well, I shouldn’t be surprised. You always were a f-“

   I punched her. “Don’t call me that. Yes, I’m a lesbian. But you can’t call me that. I can call you a bitch because you are. You have caused so much pain to everyone around you. You hurt me when you forcefully shaved my legs when I was 8! You told a 7 year old child that he was ‘too old for toys’ but then said you were joking when I highly doubt you were. You cheated on Dad with at least three guys. One of them was your friend’s husband. He was our neighbor, for fuck’s sake! Did you really think you wouldn’t be caught when he lived that close by?”

   “Well, I-“ Denise began.

   “Shut up.” I said. “Luckily, your friend beat you up after you did that. So, you got what you deserved. But you still did it. You neglected the Littles. You did take care of your own kids. If you weren’t going to take care of them, why did you even have kids with my dad? You are a shitty person and an even shittier mom. You deserve to be here.”

   “If I was so bad, why are you here?” Denise asked. “You’re just as bad as I am.”

   “Oh, I have a Paradise.” I said. “I just work here. Unlike you, I have never yelled at kids for being kids, neglected kids, or cheated on my husband. You did that. Not me.”

   Denise opened her mouth to say something but no sound came out.

   “And, worst of all, you kill me.” I said, my hands gripping the dagger tighter. “I still don’t know why. I’m guessing it was because you found out I’m gay and you’re a shitty homophobe. You also killed Ryan and he did nothing wrong. He’s innocent in all of this. He is just a child. There is nothing you can say that will excuse that.”

   With that, I reached over and cut her throat open. I thought, enjoy choking on your own blood. Just like I did.

   I pulled the lever that sent Denise to her level and sat back in my chair. It was done. She couldn’t hurt anyone anymore. I had finally won.

   I didn’t realize I started crying until Meg hugged me. I hugged back. 

   That night, I told Ryan what happened. He seemed upset she didn’t change but was happy that she couldn’t hurt anyone anymore. I told him that he could tell me anything and, if he needed someone to talk to about this, I would always be there to listen.

   I sat on my bed and looked outside my Paradise house. Rocky walked over to me and put his head in my lap. He barked softly and I put my hand through his fur.

   I can finally be free from her. I thought. Free to not be scared and let what she has said and done affect me. Everything can be okay now. It will be okay now.

   And, with that, I fell asleep with a smile on my face.

Chapter Text

I took a few days off from the Hellp Desk after my ex stepmom entered Hell. I needed a break from that emotional rollercoaster. I got on my computer and turned on MortalTube.

   I first checked on my mom. She was currently hanging out with some friends at a bar. She had said that, when she turned 50, she would cut her hair short since she always had kinda long hair. But she didn’t do it immediately after her 50th birthday. When I checked on her through MortalTube, it looked like she was now 60 years old. So that meant 8 years had passed since I died. She looked happy which made me happy.

   I looked up my dad on MortalTube. My little sister was now 15 and my dad was doing his best to take care of her as a single dad. I could tell that the death of two of his kids affected him, but he was trying his best to raise my little sister in the best way he could. He had stopped drinking (which I was happy about. I had basically only seen him drink beer when I was alive so this was an improvement). My little sister had officially been diagnosed with ADHD and had gotten medication for it so she wasn’t as wild as she was when she was younger. With help from my dad and people at her school, she calmed down and became a better person. Denise dying probably helped with that as well since I didn’t think she was a good influence on my little sister. My dad was still occasionally looking at dating apps but hadn’t officially been with anyone yet. I was glad that he was focusing on raising my little sister instead of getting into another relationship and risking it turning into a bad one like it was with my ex stepmom. 

   I then checked on some of my friends. My friend Anu had become an engineer and was still dating my friend Spencer. Spencer had become a history teacher and was teaching at our high school. He was in our old World History teacher’s classroom. My friend Bella had quit doing theater because there was too much drama going on that she had to deal with and focused on becoming a beautician. 

   My friend Ethan was still dating my twin and had released some video games. He even made one based on a DnD campaign I was a part of. I did some research about that game and discovered that he made a tribute to me in the game. He added my DnD character from the campaign he did in the game. He even added all the story bits as a side quest in the game. I smiled at that. I knew I had to play the game when it eventually came out (and if it was available in the Afterlife).

   I then checked in on my cousins. A few of them had kids. My cousin Logan had adopted 2 kids with his wife. Some of my other cousins had gotten some pets. My cousin Alyssa had finally escaped her family’s pressure of being perfect and had started her own dance studio. All of my cousins had jobs that made them happy. From what I see, their lives were going well.

   Finally, I checked on my twin. He had traveled a lot from the time I died to when I decided to check in. He went to France a few times, Greece (he posted a pic with the caption, “this is for you, Caitlyn.” I had always wanted to go there but I never could since I died), Italy, and many more countries and states. He got a job in a museum and started to work in the National WW2 museum in New Orleans, Louisiana. He moved there with Ethan and they got married. What made me start to cry was he left a seat empty and put my picture in it as a little tribute. I smiled at that (and because of the fact my twin got married). When I checked in, my twin was expecting a baby. I was happy that his life was doing good.

   I closed the computer. Everyone I cared about was doing well. I wished I could’ve been a part of that but I knew that I would be able to hear all about it when they eventually passed away and entered the Afterlife. I stood up and texted Meg, asking to hang out. She agreed. I smiled at that. 

   I wasn’t ready to admit to having feelings for her yet. But just being friends was enough for now. I grabbed a white jacket and left my Paradise.

I walked over to Meg’s house and knocked on the door and, a moment later, it opened.

   Meg was wearing a red jacket over a white shirt and black leggings. “Hey. You okay?”

   “Yeah. I hope I wasn’t interrupting anything.” I said.

   Meg shook her head. “You’re good. I was just catching up on some paperwork. I still have some final stuff to sign after leaving Bel’s legion. I think I’m almost done though. Then I can finally start to enjoy my new job.”

   “That’s good.” I said. 

   “Want to play a game together?” Meg asked.

   “Sure. What game?” I replied.

   “Minecraft?” Meg suggested. “I have two computers in the basement so we could both play.”

   “Good idea.” I said. “Let’s go.”

   So, that’s what we did for 2 hours. We played, talked, laughed, and had a great time. Once it was time for me to leave, Meg led me to the door.

   “I had a lot of fun.” I said. “Thanks for letting me come over.”

   “No problem,” Meg replied. “I had fun too.”

   We stood there in awkward silence for a moment. I didn’t want to leave but it was getting late. I knew I was dead and had no heartbeat, but I could’ve sworn I could feel it pounding in my chest.

   Should I do it? I wondered. Should I tell her?

   Meg smiled and leaned down. She gave me a kiss on the cheek. Stunned, I just froze and stared up at her.

   “Good night, Charlie. I’ll see you tomorrow.” She said.

   “Y-yeah…” I stammered. 

   Meg then walked back inside her house and closed the door.

   Oh my god… I thought. Did that actually happen? Am I dreaming right now? 

   After pinching my arm, I realized it wasn’t a dream. Meg did actually kiss my cheek.

   I started walking away from her house with a smile on my face. I whispered, “Hell yeah…”

Chapter Text

“What’s going on with all the demons?” I asked when I entered the Hellp Desk the next day.

   Lily turned to me and sighed. “So, you know how people in the Mortal world get sick? Well, demons can’t really die or get sick. But, every once in a while, they can. They can’t get stuff like the flu or cancer. But they can get a cold and they are very dramatic about it.” She looked at her husband who was sitting on the ground next to Lily, his head in her lap. “Bel, honey, you aren’t going to die from a cold.”

   Bel sniffled. “You don’t know that though.”

   “Yes, I do. Just drink this.” Lily gave him a cup. “How about you go back home to my Paradise house and rest? I’ll be there in a bit to take care of you.”

   “Okay…” Bel reluctantly got up and left the Hellp Desk.

   “You’re right about the dramatic bit.” I said. “Is that why Penny isn’t here? Is she taking care of Greg?”

   “Yep.” Lily said. “I’ll probably shut down the Hellp Desk for the rest of the day. Unless you think you can work by yourself?”

   “Nope.” I said. “I’ll take the day off.

   Lily shrugged. “Fair enough. See you tomorrow… maybe. Hopefully?

   “I’ll see you whenever the demons are better.” I said.

   “Yeah.” Lily then walked away. After a moment, I left, too. I decided I was going to check on Meg to see how she was doing and if she got the rest of the demons’ cold.

   I got to her house and knocked on the door. “Meg? It’s me. You okay?”

   I then heard a sneeze and a voice mumble, “No.”

   I knew then that Meg also got the demon cold.

   Damn it. I thought. What should I do? I’ve never dealt with this before. Should I text Lily? Would I be bothering her? Fine… I’ll text her. She might have a solution.

   Hey, Lily. I texted her. So, I’m pretty sure Meg got the demon cold. What should I do? I want to help but I don’t know how.

   Lily then explained to me what to do. So, I did what she asked (and silently hoping I didn’t mess any of it up). 

   During the time I took care of her, I wondered if I should mention when Meg kissed me on the cheek. Part of me wanted to see if that meant she felt the same way as I did about her or if I was just imagining it. But I didn’t. She was sick and probably was more focused on getting better. So, I stayed silent about it.

   We'll talk about it once she’s recovered. I decided. 

   After a few days of me helping take care of Meg, she got better. I was glad. But then anxiety started building in my mind. 

   How should I bring it up? What if she doesn’t remember? Or what if she doesn’t feel the same and I embarrass myself? What if this causes us to not be friends anymore? Or- the anxious thoughts spiraled.

But I tried to stay calm. Overthinking wasn’t going to help with this situation. I knew that. But that didn’t stop those thoughts from trying to mess with me.

   She’s going to reject you. A voice in my head said. Why would she feel the same way? She’s a beautiful demon, and you are a mortal soul with mental health issues. 

   First of all, my mental health issues are fine. I told the voice. I’ve been going to the therapy levels in my free time. Secondly, I can’t predict the future. Sure, Meg could reject me. But she could also feel the same way and I’ll finally have a girlfriend. It can go either way.

   It’ll most likely end badly. The voice in my head replied. 

   Shut up. I told the voice.

   I glanced over at Meg, who was currently sleeping in her bed. I yawned, exhausted. I hadn’t slept much since I had gone over to her house to help Meg. 

   Sleeping a bit wouldn’t hurt… I thought. So, I went over to the couch and fell asleep.

Chapter Text

I woke up after about an hour. I stood up and decided to check on Meg. She was awake.

   “Hey. How are you feeling?” I asked her.

   “Much better.” Meg replied. “Though you didn’t have to take care of me.”

   “I know I didn't have to,” I said, “but I wanted to.”

   “Why?” Meg asked. “You could’ve done something else besides taking care of me. You didn’t have to do this.”

   “Yes, I did.” I told her. “Because I care about you. Is that so hard to believe? Also, I'm a soul. I have eternity to do whatever I want. Spending a few days here to help you is nothing.”

   Meg chuckled. “I guess that makes sense.”

   After that, we spent the rest of the day just hanging out and talking. Meg thanked me for taking care of her and I told her it wasn’t a big deal.

   Eventually, after 2 more days, Meg was well enough to go back to work. So, I was able to go back to the Hellp Desk.

   “Hey, guys. What’s going on?” I asked when I got there.

   “Oh, hey.” Lily said. “Nothing much. It’s been pretty boring today so far.”

   “Yeah.” Sharkie sighed. They sounded very bored. “I haven’t even been able to use my new chainsaw yet.”

   “Sharkie, if you want to use it, just go to Level 9. I’m sure Greg won’t mind if you use it on those souls.” I suggested.

   Sharkie stood up. “That’s a good idea. Thanks, Charlie.”

   Sharkie then grabbed a chainsaw and ran to the elevator. 

   I chuckled a little and sat at my desk. Everything is back to normal I guess.

   “How are all the demons?” I asked Lily.

   “Bel and Greg are feeling better after the cold.” Lily replied. “How’s Meg?”

   “Good. She’s going back to work on Level 7 today.” I said.

   Lily nodded. “Good.” 

   A week went by without anything too crazy happening. But then something happened.

   I was on my way to the Hellp Desk and got a text from Meg. 

   Meg texted, Can you come to my place? We need to talk.

   Seeing the words “we need to talk” made me anxious. Why did she want to talk? Was it good news or bad news? What was going on?

   I took a deep breath and replied, okay. I’ll be there soon.

   I got to Meg’s house in a few minutes. I knocked on the door. As I waited for her to open it, I fidgeted with my hoodie nervously.

   Finally, after what felt like forever, the door opened. Meg was there and smiled. “Hey. You came.”

   “Yeah.” I said. “So… what’s going on? Are you okay?”

   “Yeah, I’m okay.” Meg assured me. “It’s just…” she hesitated. “Just some inside, please?”

   “Okay.” I stepped inside her house and sat down on the couch. “What’s going on?”

   “Okay…” Meg took a deep breath. “So, I’ve noticed we’ve been getting… closer recently. If I’m overthinking this, please tell me. But…” Meg hesitated. I noticed she was blushing a little. “But I’ve noticed I have feelings for you. I think I love you. I didn’t notice until I got sick, but I think I’ve been feeling this way for a long time. I just never realized it. Again, if I’m overthinking this or over analyzing our interactions, please tell me so I don’t feel too embarrassed about this. But I-I think you may feel the same way.” Meg looked at me. “Am I right?”

   I blushed. “Yes… I-I love you. I didn’t say anything about it because I was scared you didn’t feel the same way.”

   Meg smiled and hugged me. “Well, I do feel the same way. You don’t need to worry about that.”

   “I guess not.” I said. “So… what happens now? Are you my girlfriend now?”

   Meg replied, “if you want me to be, yes.”

   I smiled. “Then I guess you’re my girlfriend now.”

   “And you’re mine.” Meg replied.

   Then she kissed me. 

   This was the best day I had ever had in my afterlife so far.

Chapter Text

Meg and I had been together for a few weeks. Things had been going great. Everyone at the Hellp Desk was supportive of us. We were happy. 

   One day, I suggested we do a movie date. Meg agreed. I went to her house and we soon got some snacks and got comfy on the couch. I chose the movie: Jurassic Park.

   “Why this movie?” Meg asked.

   I shrug. “It’s my favorite movie. Why’d you ask? Have you not seen it before?”

   “No, I haven’t.” Meg admitted.

   I gasped. “Okay. Is it okay if I infodump a little bit about this movie and the franchise?” 

   “Yes,” Meg chuckled. “But after we watch this movie. Deal?”

   I sighed. “Fine. Deal.”

   And we watched it. I wore my Jurassic Park shirt (it had the original movie logo on it) and some comfy pants. Meg was wearing some red and black pajamas. I enjoyed the movie (even though I had already seen it about 5 times before) and it looked like Meg did too. Once the movie was over, I did infodump about my knowledge of the Jurassic Park/Jurassic World franchise/universe. 

   Meg seemed entertained by my rambling though. I think she liked seeing me talk about something I liked though. I didn’t care. I just wanted to tell someone about what I knew about this series and not be told to shut up or be scared I would be annoying. 

   Once I was done, we made plans to eventually watch the rest of the movies (I tried to not spoil too much while rambling so she wasn’t spoiled when we watched those movies). 

   We cuddled on the couch for a bit, just sitting in silence. Meg had laid down and wrapped her arms around me so I couldn’t really move. I didn’t care though. I liked it. Eventually, I fell asleep.

   Over the next few weeks, we watched the rest of the Jurassic Park/Jurassic World movies. After we watched the first one, I had made Meg a fan of the series. So, I finally had someone I could talk about these movies with and not be scared I would be annoying. 

   Eventually, we had watched all of the Jurassic Park/Jurassic World movies. We even watched the new one and I had opinions about it.

   “You okay?” Meg asked after we watched Jurassic World Rebirth.

   I sighed. “Okay. I’m going to rant about this for a bit. Tell me to shut up if it’s too much.”

   “You can rant about it.” Meg said. “Now I’m curious.”

   I took a deep breath. “The movie was okay. The plot was fine. But remember when one of the characters said the island was full of hybrid dinosaurs and we only see one. I think there was a hybrid in the lab area but I’m not counting that. It doesn’t interact with the humans and doesn’t try to fight anything. I’m pretty sure it was dead so I don’t count it. I wish there were more hybrid dinosaurs and more deaths. But I thought the river raft scene was cool since it reminded me of a scene from one of the books —yes, there are Jurassic Park books. They are called ‘Jurassic Park’ and ‘Lost World’ by Micheal Crichton.”

   “So what’s the problem?” Meg said. “Those sound like good things.”

   I replied, “The main thing I hated is the new hybrid —I think it was called the D-Rex or something stupid like that. It is so fucking ugly and it barely got any screen time to seem intimidating and a threat to the characters. It just showed up a bit in the beginning and some at the end and didn’t even fight any known dinosaurs. I remember in the first Jurassic World movie the hybrid dinosaur in that movie fought the T-Rex and the mosasaur (author’s note: idk how to spell it). But the D-Rex just bothered the humans and scared the kid. That’s it. It barely even killed anyone —and did I mention how ugly it is? Because it’s so damn ugly. Why does it have four large legs and two tiny ones? Why is its face shaped like that? Why does it have a tumor on its face? Anyway, I rate the new Jurassic World movie a 5/10. It gets -5 points mainly because of the stupid D-Rex.”

”damn.” Meg said, shocked. “You really hate that thing.”

“Yep.” I said. “I’ve never hated a fictional creature more than I hate the D-Rex in this movie.”

“Well, it most likely is dead and won’t show up in another movie.” Meg said. “So you won’t have to see it again.”

”good.” I said.

After we watched those movies, Meg decided to show me her favorite movie. I will admit I didn’t love it, but I did enjoy spending time with Meg and listening to her talk about a movie she loves. 

   One day, we decided to set up a little hang out with the group. Lily, Bel, Penny, and Greg agreed to come with. So, when the day came, we dressed up and met up near the Hellp Desk and left to go do a trivia night together. We all had a great time. Lily and Bel got drunk and left early. After that, everyone started to slowly leave. Meg had to carry me back to my Paradise because of how drunk I accidentally got. As soon as she put me into the bed, I fell asleep.

Chapter Text

It had been a year (well, year in the Afterlife. Not sure how long it’s been in the mortal world) since Meg and I started dating. It’s been going great. I’ve never been happier.

   I had thought about reincarnation but I decided to do what Lily and Penny did and give that up. So, I’m now a full resident of the Afterlife. 

   Life in the Afterlife has been great. I’ve been hanging out with my little brother. I’ve been talking to my grandpas about what their lives were like. My grandmas on both sides of my family eventually passed away and I was able to talk to them, too.

   Then something I had been waiting for happened.

   My twin had finally passed away.

   I was waiting for him at the gate. Then I finally saw him.

   I hugged him. “Hey, Mars.”

   “Caitlyn?” He hugged me back. “I’ve missed you. So damn much… I hate that she took your life. But I’m so glad I get to see you again.”

   I smiled. “I’m happy I get to see you too. Denise is in Hell now. You can go down there and beat her up if you want. I already got my revenge on the shit she did to us. But you can still do that if you want.”

   “Okay. Thanks.” Mars said. “I’ll do that after we hang out for a bit. Both sets of our grandparents are in the Afterlife too, right? Where are they?”

   Then we spent a few days catching up. I told him about my demon girlfriend and all my friends at the Hellp Desk. My twin told me about his husband, Ethan, and their kid. I was happy for them. Ethan and Mars had been dating since high school so I was happy they had a good life together.

   “Are you guys going to reincarnate together when Ethan gets here?” I asked Mars.

   “Maybe.” Mars said. “I’ll talk to Ethan about it when he enters the Afterlife. Until then, I'm just happy staying here with my family.”

   “Fair.” I said. “Come on. Let’s get you your Paradise and then I’ll show you mine.”

   I grabbed my twin’s hand and we ran to find each other’s paradises. It made me think.

   My Afterlife has been great. I’ve made many friends. I have a girlfriend now. I’ve talked to my family members who passed away before me and got to know their stories. I’ve written more. I’ve done the things I wanted to do in my life and more. 

   Dying and ending up in the Afterlife may be scary at first. But, in the end, it can be fantastic.