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Gordon gazed at him. Longingly.
Desperation hit him like a truck. Ingrained, he knew. He knew this was the last time he would see Barney. How he wished he hadn’t boarded.
What he would give to stop that train, to run up to him, and meet his lips. If only.
It had been years since the Black Mesa incident… since he was locked away and imprisoned. That desolate, horrible day marked the beginning of humanity’s fall.
Barney looks different now; they all do.
No matter how many decades pass. The trauma and PTSD remain. Always is. It always will be. It’s a constant weight he can’t let go of. Barney remembers it too- he wishes he didn’t have to. He was so young, just joined the academy.
Yet… Barney’s still reminiscent of their first day—the day they met at Black Mesa. He recalls seeing a new scientist in the building—a new face—an awkward, nerdy guy with glasses. Something was captivating about him—he was kind and didn’t speak, but he had those striking emerald eyes in which he caught himself getting lost in. How he wished he could relive that moment again.
How he loved him… Gordon was his only good memory of that wretched, hellish place, the place where they all lost their innocence. Now, their eyes lock for one final time. a silent farewell heavy with everything they couldn’t say.
Deep down, he wanted to hold onto this- hold onto him. To burn it into his mind- he didn’t want to forget, because he knew: this was the bitter end.
Whatever future lay ahead, it wouldn’t include Gordon.
For once, Gordon wished Barney could stop avoiding conversation. All he did was talk about remembrance and nostalgia- what once was. He never liked addressing the past; kept things bottled up. Made a habit of it.
So many questions remained unanswered.
Gordon is different now. Though he looks the same, he can't tell how. Yet he doesn’t recognize his once-old friend.
Neither of them do.
Barney wishes he didn’t have to leave. He just got Gordon back for Christ’s sake. Please, just one more minute- the words repeated endlessly in both their heads. Although the words in their minds screamed to be released, they lingered in silence as they fixed their gazes at one another.
Love is a peculiar thing in this new, twisted world. War prevents love. The Combine never liked it, they succeeded in eradicating it.
Barney was never good at goodbyes.
20 years ago, he watched Gordon get taken- dragged away by HECU soldiers. He watched as the blood slowly seeped down his head, unconscious. Atleast, that’s what he hoped- that he was merely unconscious.
Before he could do something- anything, run up to him, save him for God's sake something-
He was back outside, abruptly.
He left Black Mesa, believing his best friend was dead.
Now, present day, he stands atop the train. Leaving Gordon once again, like all those years ago. Oh, how history repeats itself.
Barney was never good at goodbyes. Still isn’t.
He would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about Gordon, even once all this time. Barney desperately wants to utter something sentimental for this final moment, except nothing comes out of his mouth nor to mind. He’s never been good at acting all buddy-buddy when he has the Resistance to lead. Everyone depends on him.
A glass wall sits between them after a treacherous battle no different from the ones they’ve faced beforehand, saving everyone. Saving everyone, but themselves. The echoes of gunfire still linger in the air, heavy with the cost of their victories.
Gordon’s once-vibrant emerald eyes grew weary and dulled. Barney's gaze mirrored his, a reflection of exhaustion. It’s as if everything’s coming to a close between them.
The seconds pass by.
’’I’ll see ya when I see ya…’’
The only thing Barney said. The words hung in the air, a bittersweet promise.
Gordon watched in awe as the man he loved whisked away into the mist. Every instinct urged him to reach out, to smash through the wall that separated them, to close the distance just once more. But that was the reality of their lives now—they were separated by more than just glass.
But the reality was cruel.
He’s Gone now.