Work Text:
“Cheers!”
The four clinked their drinks together, coffee and tea sloshing in their glass cups. An and Akito both went to take a swig of their drinks and immediately regretted it as the hot liquid burned their tongues and throats. Kohane giggled at the sight while Toya simply sighed with a fond look. Around them, the VIRTUAL SINGERS struck up conversation with the other three and each other, bringing crase cafe to life.
They had done it. RAD WEEKEND had been surpassed with the new legendary night RAD BLAST, a new sight like no other. Now, Vivid BAD SQUAD was the talk of the town—the underdogs, having risen up from the ashes to a blazing flame that burned hotter like never before, to the new legends of Vivid Street.
Toya couldn't help the small smile that reached his eyes as he raised his mug of coffee—black, as always—to his lips. Everyone around them had put them down, said they couldn't do it—even Toya himself doubted time and time again in his composing journey, can I really do this? Can I pull this off? Can we really surpass that legendary night? But here they were, the day after RAD BLAST, relaxing and chatting with the VIRTUAL SINGERS.
Now, if Toya focused on the conversations a little harder... Rin-chan, Len-kun, and KAITO-san were chatting with Shiraishi about what was next after they'd surpassed RAD WEEKEND (that was simple, they were going to take on the world); MEIKO-san and Luka-san were talking with Akito about his assignment from before, and how he felt about it still (that's right, they both played a part in helping Akito overcome that obstacle, right?); Miku and Azusawa were discussing something a little further from the rest of the group, something Toya couldn't make out (Azusawa mentioned in passing about Miku visiting her just before their event; was that it?).
As for the composer himself, he was much more content to simply sit back and watch his friends and teammates enjoy their brief break before they picked their stride back up again. To take on the world—that was their true goal. RAD WEEKEND had simply been a stepping stone in all of it; an important one, yes, but the stone that would launch them into the international stage. But then, his phone buzzed; Toya pulled it out of his pocket and watched as the screen lit up with a new notification. His eyes widened—when had they last spoken? Not since beginning training with Ken-san, he was pretty sure. So what, a couple of months?
... Right, she was busy with...
Toya stood up and exited the cafe, opening Nightcord to stare at his newest DM. It was barely anything, only two lines, but nostalgia rose up in Toya again at the sight of the person's curtness. The smile on his face grew just a little as he began unconsciously pacing in the small plaza outside the cafe.
Yuki (9:22am)
> Willow. Let's meet up again before you begin running to a new world.
Willow (9:22am)
> Of course. How does this Saturday at 4 sound? We can go to that cafe from before.
Yuki (9:23am)
> 4:30. Cram school.
Willow (9:23am)
> Got it. See you then.
...No further reply. Toya quietly chuckled; he expected very little else from her. A hand landed on Toya's shoulder, so he looked behind him to see his partner grinning at him. His energy was infectious; Toya couldn't help but smile at him in reply.
"Who was that?" Akito asked, trying to peer over his shoulder at Toya's phone. Toya quickly closed his phone and stuffed it back in his pocket.
"Nothing to worry about, just an old friend."
Akito wrinkled his nose. Ah, Toya chuckled internally, he probably thought he was talking about Tsukasa-senpai or Saki-san.
Perhaps that's for the best. Toya mused as Akito dragged him back inside to join the singing battle about to begin. It seemed to be Shiraishi, Azsuawa, Rin-chan, and Len-kun versus them, Miku, and Luka-san. MEIKO-san smiled at them, then swiftly moved to cut KAITO-san from abducting the ice cream. I don't think my eardrums would come out intact if they found out one of my childhood friends is Asahina Mafuyu.
They met over a decade ago. When Toya was four, he attended one of his brother's recitals with his father stuck right by his side. Toya doesn't remember the specific details of before the recital, or even really the recital itself—only the beautiful sound of classical ringing through the air and striking Toya right to his very soul—but after the recital he remembers quite vividly.
His father had told him to stay put in his seat while he and mother went to congratulate onii-san on winning the recital, and so the small child waited patiently, swinging his legs back and forth. He wasn't tall enough to reach the floor yet, but he would grow soon! His mother had told him so! Just a few more years, she had said, patting his head. Nii-san was supposed to keep an eye on him, but he went to the bathroom a little while ago...
But that's okay. Toya was good with staying put in a crowd, and there was a crowd; a ton of people were standing around, chatting with each other. Toya didn't understand why they didn't go out into the lobby—Father always said it was impolite to stand around in the hall unless you were going to see someone in the recital. But it was only a couple of minutes before it happened.
While he was sitting there, swinging his legs back and forth, someone climbed into the seat next to him. It was a little girl, her hair a plum purple falling to her shoulders. Her twilight-colored eyes were sparkling with a brightness Toya had never really seen before. She was dressed in a nice light blue dress as she hefted herself into the seat beside her.
"Hi there," she smiled at Toya, "are you lost?"
Toya shook his head. "I'm waiting for my family."
"Where are they?" She cocked her head, a curious look on her face.
"Oh, nii-san went to the bathroom, and father, mother, and onii-san are backstage. Onii-san performed today."
"Wow! Who is he?"
"Onii-san? He's the guy who won."
The girl made an amazed sound, one Toya wasn't sure how to reply to. So he just ran through the "stranger script" in his head.
"I'm Aoyagi Toya." He held out his hand to the girl. The girl blinked, then shook it.
"I'm Mafuyu!"
"What's your last name?" Toya copied the head movement she made earlier.
"Oops!" Her hands flew to her mouth, but a smile was hidden under it. "Asahina. Asahina Mafuyu."
"Well... it's nice to meet you, Mafuyu-chan."
"And you as well, Toya-kun!"
An adult appeared behind Mafuyu-chan, with the same color hair and dressed just as nice—if not nicer—as Mafuyu-chan.
"Oh, Mafuyu, there you are." The woman smiled. "Who are you talking to?"
"This is Toya-kun! He's waiting for his family, but I thought he was lost, so I went to say hi."
The woman smiled and greeted him; he nodded in reply, putting up his defenses against an adult. Mafuyu-chan was one thing, she seemed to be the same age as him. But this woman...?
"Are you ready, Mafuyu?" The woman asked. Mafuyu-chan nodded.
"I am, mommy! Bye Toya-kun!" Mafuyu-chan waved bye with lots of energy as she and her mother departed. Toya waved back, his wave slowly dying off as he was left alone again. Even as the rest of his family returned, he wasn't quite sure what he was feeling.
"Mother?" Toya asked quietly, sitting at the counter as he watched his mom cut up some apple slices for him. Father, nii-san, and onii-san were in the other room, talking about something he didn't know about.
"Yes, Toya-kun?" Mother gave him a smile.
"A girl my age came up to me after the recital and asked if I was lost. I told her I wasn't, but she didn't leave. She stayed and talked with me until her mother came and got her." Mother was giving him a weird look, so Toya sped up. "But after Mafuyu-chan, I got this weird feeling in my chest. Like... I didn't want her to leave?"
Mother's weird look faded and was replaced with a smile. "I get it now. You just wanted to talk with her longer. That's normal—that just means the two of you became friends."
"Is that okay...?" Father always said that such relationships weren't good for him, that he should spend more time practicing classical. But Mother nodded.
"Making relationships is okay. As long as it doesn't get in the way of your practice."
"Okay." Toya nodded. He wasn't sure if he would see Mafuyu-chan again, but if he did, he wanted to talk with her just a little longer this time.
Over the following months and years, Toya's life became increasingly crowded with classical practice; the overwhelming feelings grew slowly, drop by drop, but he still held onto the beautiful sound throughout it all. And, surprisingly, Asahina Mafuyu became an unusual constant in his life. Time after time, he would run into her at recitals and the like, always her mother with her, but sometimes her father too. Her father was a very quiet and respectful man; her mother, a bit overbearing when it came to his parents, but seemed nice enough. With enough meetings, he and Mafuyu-chan got to know each other, like how Mafuyu-chan wanted to be a nurse when she grew up.
They never met up outside of coincidental meetings—Toya busy with practice and Mafuyu-chan busy with schoolwork—but what time they had together, Toya cherished greatly. And later down the road, Toya would be eternally grateful he did so.
No, this bar should be moved up one... maybe a little more synth here...
Toya sighed, leaning back in his chair. He stared at his room's ceiling as he ran a hand through his hair. Just because Vivid BAD SQUAD was taking a tiny, little break before taking over the world didn't mean Toya could slouch in composing. In fact, he had reasoned at the time, now was the best time for him to compose—the explosive feeling of RAD BLAST fresh in his mind, perfect for creating just as explosive songs to propel them forward into the international stage.
But that wasn't to say composer's block wasn't definitely setting in. The feeling was still there, still burning bright, but the ability to translate it properly into music that everyone could understand... It wasn't leaving him, but it was definitely hiding from him. And that was just as annoying.
He let out an audible groan, resisting the urge to slam his head on his desk. That just left him with his head hurting from the force of impact. He saved his current work-in-progress and went to close the program altogether, but stopped. The conversation he had with Mafuyu a day prior suddenly popped into his head again. Did he still have—?
Still there. He blinked in surprise at the sight of the untitled file before him. It wasn't a SEKAI song—not a podcast disguised as a song that transported someone to SEKAI—but it still held a ton of feelings within it.
"I thought I finished this...?" He breathed, opening the file and hitting play. Old feelings creeped in the longer he listened—all the feelings of sorrow, anger, desperation, and despair he had poured into this song and many others like that. Underneath these feelings, he had found, was the heart of the raging fire for RAD WEEKEND he had inside. But he couldn't find those feelings before removing the layers on top. So he wrote, song after song, trying to claw his way to the fire hidden underneath the feelings he'd built up after running away. But he did it, and all of the songs he wrote from digging his way down had already been uploaded and deleted from his computer—or so he thought.
"I guess one slipped through the cracks," he murmured aloud. The song cut off suddenly; Toya jolted in surprise. He didn't even finish the melody, huh? The lyrics and music video were all complete, though, and his notes were still there. He thought for a moment, then shrugged. I need a break, anyways. He began reading over his notes, Mafuyu's lyrics, and their joint music video to try and get into the headspace for finishing this song.
The light at the end of the tunnel—that was what he had written months ago. The last song written for their duo, the finale in sudden comeback. Unfinished until he reached the top of the mountain—this was the moment he'd been waiting for, wasn't it? Even Mafuyu's lyrics reflected the growing light as the song went on. He shook his head with a smile and began finding the tracks he'd used for this song.
After an hour (maybe? Toya wasn't sure, he had a bad habit of losing track of time when caught in something), a little notification pop-up in the corner startled him out of his train of thought. A ping from Shiraishi—Toya opened up Vivid BAD SQUAD's Nightcord server, wondering what she'd poked them all about this time.
Ananananana (2:49pm)
> @Vivid BAD DORKS
> GUYS
> WINTERSTORM POSTED
Daybreaker (2:50pm)
> WHAT
Kohammy (2:50pm)
> Winterstorm's still around??
Daybreaker (2:50pm)
> i mean, they did post like
> 8 songs a couple of months ago
Ananananana (2:50pm)
> well thats bc willow went on a rampage in composing suddenly
> i remember yuki posting that she was barely catching up
> TOYA
> TOYA HAVE YOU SEEN THE NEW WINTERSTORM POST
Toya barely held back a snort. Oh, he forgot no one else knew about that—more importantly, he hadn't told any of them. His little secret.
Plushie Master (2:51pm)
> Shiraishi, you've lost me. Who's Winterstorm?
Daybreaker (2:51pm)
> oh hell no man
> we've had this conversation before
Plushie Master (2:51pm)
> ???
> Have we?
Kohammy (2:51pm)
> "Winterstorm" mentioned in server: 251 times.
Ananananana (2:52pm)
> THAT MUCH???
> man i thought we were sane
Daybreaker (2:52pm)
> you mf we just spent weeks trying to surpass a music event
> we have a pocket dimension with hatsune miku in it
> we are NOT sane
Plushie Master (2:52pm)
> Moving back: Winterstorm?
Kohammy (2:53pm)
> Winterstorm is a musical duo! They use VIRTUAL SINGER voicebanks, primarily Miku and Luka.
> They were super popular around when Vivid BAD SQUAD formed, but kind of died off a little while after.
Ananananana (2:53pm)
> their music is really similar to ours but like
> upbeat music + depressing lyrics = bangers
Kohammy (2:54pm)
> The group consists of Willow on music and art and Yuki on lyrics and video.
> They're very vague about their true identities, but people have some theories.
> But we'll never know until they come out and tell us.
Daybreaker (2:54pm)
> actually
> a couple of songs i wrote were uh
> inspired by them
Ananananana (2:55pm)
> WHICH ONES????
Kohammy (2:55pm)
> Was Kashika one of them...
Daybreaker (2:55pm)
> uh
> no comment.
Plushie Master (2:55pm)
> So, what did Winterstorm post?
Ananananana (2:55pm)
> OH YEAH
> so it's from willow
> [image.png uploaded]
I forgot this for a few months. Please tune in for the finale of Winterstorm's second season. 06:00 JST. —Willow
Toya smiled as he watched the rest of his group animatedly discuss Winterstorm's newest publication. He actually did know about Winterstorm and their entire career; it was a little hard for him not to. And he knew what the post said, he'd already seen it even before Shiraishi did.
He minimized Nightcord and opened it on his phone, passively reading the trio's flurry of messages as he continued working on Winterstorm's self-proclaimed second finale.
Middle school rolled around; Toya squeezed the strap of his bag a little tighter, his stomach turning sour and heavy as he stared at the large building in front of him. It was more time away from home, which he was grateful for now, and the larger homework load meant he spent less time practicing, but he still couldn't get rid of the despair he felt having to return home every afternoon.
He took a deep breath and approached the board full of class lists. There he was: Aoyagi Toya, Class 2-A. He nodded to himself, then scanned the higher year lists, shifting to the right a little bit to see all five sheets of names better. Where was she—?
"Toya-kun?"
Toya whipped around to come face-to-face with twilight eyes. They weren't quite as bright as when they were kids, but the sparkle was still there. Purple hair had grown out, now held in a ponytail on the back of her head. Dressed in the familiar middle school attire, Asahina Mafuyu gave him a curious look.
Toya had been surprised to learn that Mafuyu was attending the same middle school as him, but took it in stride—although they were a year apart, Toya would always hunt Mafuyu down for lunch or to walk her home from school and, towards the end of last year, walk with her to school as well. The conversation flowed back and forth between them, and sometimes didn't flow at all, but that was okay—Toya was used to the silence at this point, being the last child in the Aoyagi household.
"Have you found your class yet?" Mafuyu asked, stepping backwards out of the crowd of new students and returning students as Toya moved towards her.
"Mhm," Toya nodded. "I'm in Class 2-A this year. You're 3-B, right?"
Mafuyu's eyes widened for a moment, looking at him like a deer in headlights. "Y-yes, I am."
"Sorry, I already went and looked for you as well." Toya grabbed his right wrist—flare ups were common, but hiding his nervous tics under the guise of sudden pain was a trait he'd been forced to learn to survive. "Keeping up the Class B streak, huh?"
Mafuyu gave him a little smile; Toya wasn't sure what was wrong with it, but something— "Hehe, I guess so. Are you joining any clubs this year?"
Toya found the packed tan dirt ground much more interesting than Mafuyu's twilight slightly-alive eyes. The silence said everything for the both of them.
"Can I walk you to your class?" Toya murmured, squeezing his wrist a little tighter—actual pain shot through it this time. He cursed himself mentally; of all the days to forget his wrist brace! And it was a gift from Tsukasa-senpai, too...
"Sure," Mafuyu nodded. But then she grabbed his upper arm (distantly, Toya remembered, that she used to grab his wrist before the flare ups began. Now she avoids his wrists altogether) and tugged on the sleeve a little. Toya watched with pensive curiosity as Mafuyu rummaged through her bag; his eyes widened and his heart swelled when he saw a black accessory to the one he tried to carry with him at all times.
"I noticed that sometimes you don't have it when you have a flare up. Since you haven't pulled it out by now, you don't have it." Her voice was more hollow than normal as she handed the wrist brace to him. He took it gingerly, avoiding her eyes once more, and began adjusting the straps before sliding it over his right hand.
"Thank you," he flexed his fingers, staring down at the brace for a few moments longer before turning his gaze to her again. She nodded, and— there it was again, something flickered in her eyes. But it was gone before Toya could say anything. She smiled (it was off) at him again before moving to the other side of him; she extended her right arm to him. He couldn't help but laugh a little, hooking his arm with hers before they began off into the school.
Toya would look fondly on this moment later in life, as from here things only began to spiral.
Two weeks later, he ran away—pushed back against classical and his destiny, throwing it all to the ground with a declaration of "I can't do it anymore!" He didn't know what to do anymore, there was no guidance in what was next for him in his life, so he simply tried to do things that would make his father mad and upset. Street music seemed to be the logical choice—his father had expressed disgust in their style and music, and it almost seemed to be the dead opposite of classical. Classical was structured, binding, caging. Street music was wild, explosive, free. Toya began singing, not knowing what to do when it came to singing—he'd never trained his voice—until a couple of guys came along and helped him out.
They were nice enough, especially flattering when it came to Toya's "perfect pitch" (he didn't even realize he had that until they told him) but Toya needed to be alone for the time being, so he denied their offer to team up. He took the microphone the two guys had given him, plugged it into the speaker outside the shop, and began singing until his voice was hoarse and he couldn't think of the frozen wasteland awaiting him back home.
Throughout all of this, Toya continued to escort Mafuyu to school, to classes, and from school. They talked, but there was much less to talk about now—Toya didn't want to talk to her about street music just yet, he knew her own parents were just as strict as his own. If he were to "corrupt" their daughter, Toya would lose one of the three friends left in his life. Mafuyu, too, had become a lot quieter since Toya began singing on the streets; he assumed she also had something unspeakable going on in her life.
A few weeks later, the two of them were at Toya's house studying for their upcoming midterms. Both were star students in their classes, but literature continuously went over Toya's head and Mafuyu hadn't had to use English as a primary language for extended periods of time. They traded notes and tips, often pausing their own work to help their friend with whatever they were struggling with. But past that, their time together was spent in tentative silence, only the hum of the A/C, the scratch of their pencils, and the tap-tap of their keyboards filling the room.
Toya stretched his arms over his head, quietly groaning at all the pops and cracks echoing through his body. He took off his brace and carefully flexed his wrist; nothing hurt except for the dull ache, so he set the brace down beside his computer.
"I'm going to get a cup of coffee," he declared, ignoring the fact that the time was past dinner. He caught her gaze before continuing. "Do you want anything?"
Ah. He was right. For a brief moment, something flashed in Mafuyu's eyes, but it was gone a second later. "I'll just have a cup of coffee as well."
Toya nodded. "As you usually like it?"
A moment of silence. Minute pieces of her visage flashed through different emotions. Then her smile was back and she nodded. Toya pressed a little further: "Two sugars and a splash of milk?"
"...Yes." Okay, something was up. Toya nodded and left his room, heading downstairs to the kitchen again. Neither of his parents were around—off at some recital of some sorts—so the house was even more quiet than his room. He grabbed the bottle of instant coffee and began heating up some water, leaning against the counter and staring off into space as he thought.
Something was wrong with Asahina Mafuyu, but he couldn't figure out what it was. He began to lay down the facts: it most likely had to do with her quieter attitude as of recently, beginning around the time Toya began street music. Could they be related? —No, he shook his head. She had no idea about that, he was sure. But could she be reflecting Toya's own quiet attitude? Maybe, he thought. But Mafuyu was no copycat.
He dragged himself back on the original train of thought; what else was different? ...She had paused when Toya had asked her "as you usually like it," almost as if she didn't remember. And this wasn't the first time, he realized—it happened other times when they were together. He just thought she was thinking, but maybe she wasn't thinking about whether or not she wanted that—she was thinking about if she remembered.
So was she losing her memory? No, she was a brilliant student, and Toya was sure that if he asked her to recite something she wrote a few years ago, she could. But something was wrong, her eyes always flickered whenever he asked something of her. The water boiler clicked off as Toya shot up straight—the look in her eyes he'd never been able to place, he knew what it was now.
He quickly made two cups of coffee (one black, one with two sugars and a splash of milk) and brought them back to his room, being as careful as he could not to spill them in his rush to confirm what he was expecting. Before approaching the door, he took a deep breath and calmed his nerves and steeled his expression, then walked in.
"Here you go, as you like it." He placed the cup of coffee down in front of her. She blinked, then smiled and thanked him. He smiled back and returned to his schoolwork for a few minutes, the same silence filled with minute sounds returning to its rightful place. But Toya had to break it.
"Mafuyu," he began, watching as she looked up at him with an inquisitive expression, "are you okay?"
Oh, there it was. What he expected had come true—for a little more than a moment this time, Mafuyu's eyes flashed with that very same look he'd been seeing for weeks now, and possibly even longer if he looked for it in the depths of his memories. Quickly, her smiling—yet worried now—expression was back on her face.
"I'm fine, but what brought this on, Toya-kun?"
Toya took a sip of his coffee to calm himself for a moment (bit of an oxymoron considering that this had a ton of caffeine in it, but Toya was ignoring that for the moment in favor of not ignoring that momentary look in Mafuyu) then stared Mafuyu down. "Please don't change the subject. For a moment, something flashed in your eyes; it's actually been happening quite a lot lately."
Mafuyu glanced away, a nervous expression exploding into view. Toya continued on: "For a few weeks now, any time I asked you a certain line of questioning... Like when I asked you if you wanted your coffee as you normally like it. You weren't debating if you wanted it, you were trying to see if you still remembered what it was. Am I right?"
No response. Toya waited a beat, and that was all Mafuyu needed. "I'm not sure what you're getting at, Toya-kun."
"You're forgetting things, but you're not forgetting things academically. You're forgetting things about yourself . But if that's the case, then why haven't you changed? ...Because you're wearing a mask to hide the fact that you're forgetting."
Mafuyu glanced down at her lap, her face contorting to something a little more unreadable. Her bangs fell out of where they were tucked away on the side, fully covering her forehead. Toya hated to do this, but he had to. He had to know if he was right, because if he was it could mean that his best friend was going down a slope he narrowly avoided.
"Mafuyu. Please, drop your mask. I want to see the real you."
Mafuyu glanced up at him, that hollow look in her eyes flickering in and out. She glanced away, then back at him, then away again, like a rabbit unable to move in face of a predator.
But Toya wasn't a predator, he was merely a crow who was only just learning how to fly, just as Mafuyu was a rabbit who was only just learning to run. "I won't hate you. I just want to know because I... almost went down that way myself. So if you trust me... I'd like to see the real Asahina Mafuyu."
One beat. Two beats. Three beats. A full measure. Then Toya was greeted with the fleeting look that was now there permanently—the hollow look of a girl who has lost all preferences and become strung up like a marionette, waiting to be danced around.
Here, finally, was the real her—a shell of the girl he'd met years ago, with only despair and crushing expectations to her name.
Oh, how Toya wished his expectations weren't true.
Sometimes, composition inspiration was a struggle to find, taking Toya hours, possibly even days, to even get a rough draft of a melody out to the world. And other times, inspiration came at the snap of his fingers— always at the worst possible times. Every time.
He only had about ten minutes before his next class started, but this melody had been haunting him ever since he woke up that morning. It had sprung into his head while he was getting ready, but he had no time to even write down a rough draft before he had to head out and meet up with Akito. It'd taken such a hold of Toya's conscious thoughts that he was honestly surprised his notes were as legible as they were. If you ignored the random music bars and composition notes scribbled on the side and in the margins, of course.
The sporadic scribbling of pencil on paper echoed in Toya's ears, overpowering the idle chatter of his classmates. Dimly, he wondered if any of them had tried speaking to him or if he simply seemed too focused on his composition notebook (very specifically different from any of his class notebooks. He couldn't stand any of his material mixing across his notebooks). But the thought was quickly shoved away in favor of what could I layer on top of this synth?
A hand lightly slammed Toya's desk, not enough to disrupt his work but enough to catch his attention. Manicured and painted nails attached to a smooth hand, it had to belong to—
"Toya-kun! What'cha doing there?"
—Akiyama Mizuki, his classmate in his second year and MV creator of Mafuyu's online circle. A bright and bubbly second-year like Toya, a good friend of An and Akito's (although his partner would probably deny that), and a close confidant and pillar to Mafuyu. Loves all things cute, a fashionista, and never attends school. Honestly, Toya's always surprised (in a good way!) when they do show up. Seems they're just arriving late today.
"Ah, Akiyama," he smiled up at them, setting his pencil down. He glanced back down at his book of rough music bars and composition notes and even some quick doodles to properly convey the emotions he was pouring into this song. "I'm doing some composing before class starts up again."
"Oh, you write music?" They peered down at his notebook. After a few moments, their face scrunched up with the common emotion of "I have no idea what this means;" Toya quietly chuckled.
"I do. I do most of the composition for Vivid BAD SQUAD nowadays, actually." Mentally, he added: and Winterstorm, when it's active.
"I didn't know that!" Akiyama looked back at him with a sparkling expression. "I have a friend who writes songs for a living, but I could never figure out how to do that..."
"You could with some training and practice. Even with my background in classical, I didn't know how composition worked."
"You were raised in classical? No, wait, back on topic! Who taught you?"
Toya thought for a moment, idly holding his long-injured hand. It very rarely seriously flared-up nowadays, after years of not re-injuring it in that way, but the habit remained throughout his middle- and high-school years. There were two people who taught Toya how to compose, giving him a foundation to build on top of to make his style his own. One of these he was loath to reveal to his classmate, but the other—
“A regular from Vivid Street. His name is Souma, and he and I ended up connecting through his partner Tono. He’s a composer as well, but he’s stuck in the hospital.” Akiyama’s face fell to one of sympathy. “I wanted to contribute to Vivid BAD SQUAD in a more meaningful way—at the time, Akito and Shiraishi were joint-composing all our music—and Souma offered to teach me.”
“That’s pretty cool, Toya-kun!” Akiyama grinned. “Hey, one of these days, if you want a really cool video for your music, just hit me up!”
“I’ll keep that in mind; thank you, Akiyama.” Toya couldn’t help but smile. Akiyama winked and moved back to their desk; Toya looked at the time to see it was only two minutes until class.
…Mafuyu played a great role in helping me learn to compose, he thought wistfully. He had met the girl one day after school at the start of his final year in middle school—just before Winterstorm creeped onto the music scene—and asked her to teach him how to compose.
“I’m not going to get far in the street music scene just covering songs,” he had explained at the time, scowling at a cup of black coffee served to him just moments before. “I need to be able to pour my own feelings into the music I sing.”
“My kind of music…” Mafuyu thought for a moment, her twilight eyes dead with her mask down. “I don’t think it’s suitable for your music scene. You’re not going to get your feelings across like that.”
Toya took a long sip of his coffee, mindful of its heat.
“But I’ll still teach you if you want. It’s your decision.” Mafuyu took a bite of her cheesecake, then stared at the pastry blankly.
“…No taste?” Toya watched her closely.
Mafuyu’s brief silence was enough of an answer. Toya sighed.
“Okay. Teach me how to compose, Mafuyu.”
She was right, in the end. Even though Toya knew logically how to compose, and even a little bit how to put his feelings into his music, it wasn’t anything that was worth sharing on Vivid Street, despite his future partner’s words otherwise. Yes, he could compose, but his songs would never be something that Vivid BAD SQUAD could sing. It would be a couple of years before Souma gave him the tools necessary to properly compose in the way he needed.
And time, time to grow confident in his place in Vivid Street. Speaking of time, Toya blinked, it was time for the next class. He stuffed his composition notebook away and pulled out his next period’s notebook.
“How long… has it been like this?”
The two of them were sitting in Toya’s room, a cup of coffee in front of both of them, untouched and ignored in favor of the more pressing issue in the room.
“I don’t know,” Mafuyu shook her head, her tone flat and void of emotion. Just hearing her speak made Toya have to resist donning a truly pitying expression. “It just sort of… happened one day.”
Toya hummed, looking down at the abyss within his coffee.
“So you don’t feel anything? No emotions?”
“Nothing.” Her eyes fell to her lap. “Everything tastes bland now, too. Even Mom’s cooking. I’m forgetting what I like too… I don’t know what happened to me, but I found myself faking everything one day.” She shook her head, eyes squinting shut.
“But why? Why did this happen?” Toya felt his stomach twist and turn in guilt and pain and sorrow, feeling helpless no matter what path he went down. His friend, his close childhood best friend, was losing herself and he’d never noticed! He grasped at any straws he could find: “Did someone do this to you? Did something happen that caused this? Why did you never tell me—?!”
Mafuyu shook her head violently, shrinking in on herself. “I don’t know! All I know is that I’m forgetting what happiness and sadness and fear feel like, and what I like to do, and even what my preferred coffee order is! I don’t know anything , Toya, and all I feel is the depths of despair and I can’t take it! I… I want to disappear!!”
Mafuyu’s words stuffed the room to the brim with a black hole of sheer, ultimate despair. As her words echoed off into nothingness, so too did the black hole shrink until only a heart of guilt and a heart of hollowness remained.
“…Mafuyu.” Toya breathed. He reached his hands across the table, laying them face-up as an offering. She peered up at him through her bangs, her eyes empty and hollow. After a few moments of pensive silence, slowly her hands slid across the table and interlocked with his. He brought them up in front of both of them—an unbreakable promise for forever.
“I can’t stop these feelings—or lack thereof—from occurring.” He stared into her eyes with all the hope his scarred self could muster in that moment, for the girl who had no hope left. “I can’t keep the despair away, nor can I help you find your old and true self. I can’t help you with a problem I myself am still working through and don’t know the answer to yet.
“But I can do something. As you stand on this cliff edge looking down into the depths of despair, I can keep you from falling off the edge, keep you from walking off into a place you can never return from. I can’t save you, not when I myself haven’t been saved yet. But I can help you wait for that someone who can and will . Because someone out there will.
“So please, Mafuyu, let me help you until you find that elpis at the depths of despair.” He begged.
Mafuyu stared at him, and for a moment he saw some sort of spark in her eyes. Not a flicker of a light, nor anything permanent. But something—a flash of hope, determination to wait. Maybe, with Toya’s help, she could hold out just long enough for Toya to pass her on to the someone who could save her and help her find herself again—at least, that was Toya’s wish and hope.
In the stillness of Toya’s room, she gave him her answer: “…Okay. Thank you, Toya.”
Finally, Toya could breathe easy, knowing that even when confronted by despair, there was something he could do for Mafuyu. He wouldn’t save her nor be the hero in her story. But he would keep her waiting on the edge until her hero arrived.
The pitter-patter of the rain, the crackle of the thunder, and the snap of the lightning were her backing tracks the day she broke and ran. Her puddled footfalls acted as her drums, the backbone of her song; her heavy breaths became her harmony to the melody of the echoing biting words of her mother and the echoing spiraling words of herself.
Over the years, all the things she knew about herself had washed away with the rainfall—the rainfall of what? Was it the rainfall of her mother's "guidance?" Or the rainfall of 25ji's "friendship?" Or even the rainfall of those "feelings" in SEKAI? It didn't matter, because she didn't have anything left.
She did what she was told, and she tried everything she could - but all that got her was a fogged mind of fearful futures. She followed her parent's advice, that left her with strings attached to every part of herself. She followed Miku's advice, that left her in an eternal waiting game. She followed Kanade and Ena and Mizuki's advice, now she was sprinting for her life down a street she doesn't know, just trying to escape.
Her footsteps slip through one of the puddles, and she barely catches herself from faceplanting into the soaked asphalt. Suddenly her legs feel too weak, her knees buckle and she collapses to the ground, staring at the black abyss under her. A deep abyss, just like herself, that was what she had become.
She had found that elpis at the depths of despair... she had done it after years of waiting and leaning on her friend. But why did finding it cause her so much pain?
Suddenly the rain above her disappeared; she looked up to see the very pillar she'd reluctantly relied on until she found SEKAI. His silver eyes were full of concern, his casual clothes only slightly wet compared to her soaked-through school uniform. Over her head he held an umbrella, standing close to her. Without any words, he offered her his other hand.
She could only stare for a few moments - why didn't he say anything, why didn't he panic or yell or fret or say anything? Why didn't he push or pull, why didn't he leave her so long ago? - before scrambling to her feet and trying to make a run for it down the adjacent alleyway. She couldn't bear to look at him, not the boy with those eyes who'd been able to do what she couldn't years ago; she couldn't bear to look at the boy who gave so much without asking for an equal amount in return.
"Mafuyu!" He shouted, and halfway down the narrow alleyway something grabbed her upper arm - firm, but not squeezingly so. She whipped around to see him right beside her, looking significantly more panicked. ...That was better, that made more sense in a situation like this.
"...Did you finally tell her?" He asked after the silence had hung between them for too long and the rain had thoroughly soaked him through as well (he was still holding the umbrella, he just left it lowered...).
She looked away; he was... partially aware of what had been going on the last couple of months. Not to the detail that 25ji was, but he knew that things were coming to a head with her family. He offered his home and his presence multiple times to her, even if it meant skipping practice, but she turned him down every time. Slowly, she nodded her head.
He let out a breath; whether of relief or disappointment, she wasn't sure. She knew he nearly walked the same road she did, he had told her so, but running away... it wasn't something she was familiar with. He was; he ran away a lot before his father finally accepted his path in life at the start of his first year in high school. But was that okay? He seemed to regret running away as the years went by - never picking up street music. But running away, yes. She wasn't sure how those two weren't related.
"I'm glad you're okay," was all he said. Then, he added: "I'm happy you were able to tell her."
"Huh...?" She breathed. He shook his head, then looked over her and past her. She wanted to turn around, but not until he told her to—what if it was her father, or worse, her mother? She almost broke down again at the mere thought of her.
He put a hand on her shoulder and turned her around. Her eyes widened a little when she saw Kanade's white hair flowing behind her as she ran away from their little alleyway. Was she looking for her? Had Miku and KAITO contacted the others? Did everyone know what happened now, did they know how it ended in only disappointment?
Suddenly, her feet flew forward, barely catching the ground in time from his shove. She looked behind her to stare at him—she wasn't hurt or afraid of him pushing her away even though she should be; she was only confused at such an action. He nodded to where Kanade had disappeared down a different street.
"Do you remember the promise we made? In middle school?" He asked. She nodded.
"That you couldn't save me, but you would keep me off the cliff's edge until someone came and saved me."
He smiled; sadness ran through it, but relief too, as if he was saying goodbye forever to a beloved companion. "She's the one who will save you."
"How can you be so sure?" She retorted. She'd played this battle with herself, with Miku, even with the rest of 25ji, but she still couldn't accept the answer—there needed to be more results, more data, less bias.
"I've seen the way you two interact. She wants to save you—and I firmly believe you can." He took a deep breath. "Mafuyu. I've done my part. I've kept you off the cliff's edge. But now, that girl will be the one who can save you. I can't tell you how or why... but I just know. She can do it, if you let her."
She looked down at her shoes, soaked through by the pouring rain. Thoughts raced through her mind at a million kilometers per hour, rotating his words around in her head. Finally, she turned back around and took a few steps. Then, on the cusp of the beginnings of salvation, she stopped and turned back around.
"Toya."
He gave her an attentive look, acknowledging the use of his name.
"Were you ever saved?"
He smiled.
"...I see."
She turned around and stepped out onto the street. Kanade turned onto it from down the hill, caught her dead stare, and began running up to her. Kanade embraced her as she poured her heart out, her sobs breaking free finally. And as Kanade reassured her, she watched out of the corner of his eye as he raised his umbrella over his head again and smiled, before slinking off into the darkness.
This cafe was pretty out of Toya's way, nowhere along any of his usual routes between places—in fact, it wasn't even in Shibuya at all. But Mafuyu had deemed it sufficient enough for them to hang out without being spotted by a) either of their parents, b) either of their groupmates, and c) honestly just anyone who knew them. Thus, the small little tea and coffee shop had become Winterstorm's meet-up location.
"Ah, and here's the other half," the barista chuckled as Toya walked in. Toya sighed lightheartedly; over Winterstorm's sudden resurgence while Toya was digging for the fire of RAD WEEKEND under his feelings, he and Mafuyu had frequented this place a lot. The staff from then knew them, their orders, and the fact that they composed—but never what they wrote. That, the members of Winterstorm insisted, had to remain 100% anonymous.
"It's been a while since you've come here," the barista continued. "Been busy?"
"Ah, something like that," Toya shrugged, wordlessly sweeping the fact that he had been training to surpass the legendary night known as RAD WEEKEND under the metaphorical rug. The ordinary person never really understood. "But I'm a lot more free now for the time being."
"Well, hopefully you'll be around a lot more!" The barista grinned as he rang up Toya's order without even asking. "Mafuyu-chan's right over there, by the way," he nodded his head towards the tables by the window facing out to the busy street Toya had just come in from. Toya glanced over to see the purple-haired girl already bent over her computer. "I'll let you know when it's ready."
"Thank you," Toya smiled, then moved over to Mafuyu. "Mafuyu."
"Toya," Mafuyu glanced up from her computer to nod at him.
"How's living with your friend going? ...Kanade, right?" He began unpacking his computer and headphones from his messenger bag, setting everything up and plugging the device into the wall.
"Mm. It's alright." At least she was honest, he supposed. "...I went to your show."
Toya nearly dropped the brick of a computer charger in his hands. "Y-you went to RAD BLAST?" Oops. He didn't mean to sound so surprised. But he knew for a fact that Mafuyu didn't... really care for Vivid BAD SQUAD's music. She always tried, for Toya. But there hadn't been anything yet that clicked for her.
She nodded, then looked out the window, idly watching the people walk by. Toya followed her gaze, but found nothing there that might've been noteworthy. "...I still don't understand it. Why did you put so much passion into this music, into a kind of music that didn't seem to help people."
Toya opened his mouth, planning to—not for the first time—explain that the fire of Vivid Street was simply a different kind of music, that the spirit of street music was inherently different from 25ji's music, etc. etc.—but Mafuyu suddenly smiled softly, cutting him off before he could even speak.
"But I felt the heat in that room. The way the entire room took your breath away, burned brighter than the sun. It was an important night, I could tell." Her smile faded as she looked at Toya, who was sitting, wide-eyed and mouth slightly agape. "I think you and your group succeeded in surpassing that night."
Toya closed his mouth and gave her the most genuine smile he could to express his emotions. "Thank you. Really, for supporting us despite... well." He shrugged, giving her a you know look. She hummed, glancing down at her computer again. He opened up his laptop as he continued, "Are you working on our next song already?"
"Mm. I got an idea between your event and when I ran away. I'd like to get this finished before you figure out where you're going next."
"I agree."
"Do you have any ideas for art?"
"Well—" He began, but was cut off by his name being called out. He stood up and shot a really quick "I'll explain it in a second!"—ignoring Mafuyu's quiet huff—before picking up his order from the counter.
Winterstorm (@truewinterstorm)
27min ago
「 Keep your eyes on me, my dearest fatale! 」
Sorry for the delay, I was busy "running to a new world," and Yuki was "as always, in the Night Code." See you soon for the third season, from Winterstorm. —Willow
Fatale—08:00 JST.
[Alt ID: A picture of a window, with bright light shining through, and a wooden table, presumably a coffee shop of some kind. On top of the table sits two computers, both fairly sleek and modern with little-to-no decorating; the one on the right has a RADder and Vivid BAD SQUAD sticker, while the one on the left has only a black cat sticker. Beside the computer on the left is an open notebook, with kanji scrawled in; a cord stretches from the computer on the right to outside the photo off to the right, presumably a set of headphones. Two peace signs extend from the left and right respectively, from who are presumed to be Yuki and Willow. The hand on the left has a white sleeve, while the hand on the right has a dark blue sleeve with some rings on the fingers.]