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It’s late at night and Hinata is making his first set of rounds. He leaves the patient in room 109 until the end. The poor guy, he seems really confused and is probably going to want to talk for a while. Hinata shakes his head a little and smiles. “They always do” he thinks.
He finishes up with everyone else and heads off to room 109, Kageyama Tobio’s room. As he enters the room he sees some slight movement in the corner but nothing really stands out. He goes over and checks Kageyama’s vitals and makes sure no wires or tubes have been disturbed. He changes the bandages around where he was shot and makes sure everything still looks like it’s healing properly. He looks down at Kageyama for a minute and then reaches out and runs his fingers through his hair, it’s softer than it looks and a beautiful inky black. From the corner he hears “Why can I feel it when you touch me?”
Hinata looks up and sees Kageyama standing there, or sees his spirit sort of hovering in the standing position. “I’ve always been receptive to seeing spirits and such. That’s probably why you can feel me.” He answers.
“Is that why nobody else can see me? Am I dead?” Kageyama asks.
“No, you are not dead, only in a coma. And yes, since you are a spirit right now nobody else will be able to see you. Well there might be others like me but I’ve never met one.” Hinata answers.
“So what happened to me?” Kageyama asks. “Why am I in the hospital and why am I not in my body anymore?”
Hinata looks a little concerned at these questions. “What is the most recent thing you remember?”
Kageyama furrows his brows and says. “It was after practice and I was walking back to the dorms. Everyone else had left, I was working on my serve. Something hurt, and then I woke up here in this room.”
“Ok” Hinata says. “Well, you were shot.” He points at the bandage just below his left pec.
“You were actually really lucky, the bullet missed your heart. You have a punctured lung and several of your ribs are broken. You should make a full recovery, but it will take time. We’re going to need to figure out how to get your spirit back into your body though.” Hinata says.
“I was shot, why?” Kageyama asks.
“They caught the shooter, he was hired by someone to kill you. He won’t say who though.” Hinata answers. “That’s about all I know.”
“Oh” Kageyama says. “So somebody hates me enough to kill me. I shouldn’t be surprised.”
Hinata looks a little closer and notices that Kageyama looks really sad. He reaches out and holds the hand that does not have an IV in it. Kageyama looks up and pauses before saying “That’s really weird. I’m over here and it feels like you are standing here holding my hand.”
“You just looked kind of sad. I would think you would be mad.” Hinata says.
“Yeah, well, I am, but I don’t have many friends and now someone dislikes me enough to kill me. So, yeah…..” Kageyama sighs out.
“Well, I’m here now so let’s see what we can do to get you back to your body and woken up.” Hinata says.
Kageyama looks surprised and says “You want to help me? Why?”
“Why wouldn’t I, you are kind of stuck here and I want to help you.” Hinata says a bit confusedly.
“Most people don’t want to be around me, so I just figured you wouldn’t want to either.” Kageyama shrugged.
“One day I’m going to have you tell me why you think everyone hates you. But first let’s get you back to your body. It’s much easier to go get coffee that way.” Hinata says smiling at Kageyama.
Kageyama’s not sure but he feels his heart flutter ever so slightly. “Weird” he thinks. “Hey, can you leave the room or are you tied here?” Hinata asks while he’s thinking.
“I can pretty much roam wherever I want. I don’t seem tied to the room.” Kageyama answers.
“That’s great, you can come home and stay with me. You won’t be so bored and we can talk about getting you reattached to your body. I need to go take care of more patients and do some paperwork. I’ll be back in a few hours.” Hinata says as he starts walking out of the room.
Kageyama stares at him wonderingly and reaches out a hand to try to hold him back before he realizes Hinata is no longer in the room. “What the hell is going on?” he thinks “And why is my heart fluttering?”
Just as Hinata stated he came back in a few hours. They spent some time talking about random things. Hinata admitted that he had seen him play volleyball before. They were going to different colleges, but Kageyama was the hometown hero, and since Hinata loved volleyball he couldn’t help but go watch a few matches. (Ok it was almost all of them, but Kageyama didn’t need to know that.) Kageyama made sure that Hinata really wanted to let him stay at his house to which Hinata’s response was “Of course.”
After Hinata’s shift was over he went in and told Kageyama it was time to go home. “Let me try something, ok?” Hinata said.
“Ok” Kageyama answered.
Hinata reached out and tried to touch the spirit Kageyama’s hand. “Can you feel that?” he asked.
“Sort of, it’s just kind of a warm feeling.” He responds.
“Ok, good, now reach out and try to touch me.” Hinata says.
Kageyama does and Hinata starts to giggle. Kageyama pulls his hand back quickly and pouts. “Why are you laughing at me?” he asks.
“No, no, I’m not laughing at you. When you touch me it feels sort of like a feather and it tickles. It’s ok, really.” Hinata answers.
Kageyama looks relieved at this and then asks why they needed to touch. “Well.” Hinata starts. “It makes it easier for you to find me. Now that you know what I feel like you should be able to sense me nearby. I can also do the same thing now. Try it, feel around for me.”
Kageyama looks at him disbelievingly. “Feel for you……are you some kind of idiot?”
“Says the spirit who can’t get back into his own body.” Hinata retorts. “Just do it and stop being stupid.”
“Fine.” Kageyama huffs out. He starts to “feel” around for Hinata when a familiar warmth reaches him. He looks up in surprise to see Hinata staring at him with a brow raised.
“Worked, didn’t it?” he says.
Kageyama blushes and says “Yeah. Fine. Let’s go then.”
“Follow me then, I’m parked in the basement.” Hinata says.
Kageyama follows that warmth down to the basement, into Hinata’s car. It’s weird how comforting that feeling is to Kageyama and he doesn’t really want to explore that any further at the moment.
Hinata drives them home talking about his day and shares what he can about his job. He talks about how he wanted to be able to help people get well and make it easier for them to get better. He talks about playing volleyball in high school and that they should play together when Kageyama is well. He talks about how he really likes meat buns and then stops to pick up a few at the drive through.
They reach Hinata’s apartment and head inside. It’s a bit of a mess but not too bad. There is a big room that has the living room, dining room and a portioned off kitchen in it. Down a short hall beside the kitchen is the bedroom and bathroom. “So I need to get some sleep. Do you want me to put on a movie for your or something?” Hinata asks.
“Umm, ok.” Kageyama answers. “I thought you were going to tell me how to get back to my body?”
That catches Hinata in the middle of a yawn. “I will, but I’m really sleepy, that was a twelve hour shift. I promise we’ll talk about it tomorrow after I sleep.” He says as another yawn overcomes him.
“Alright.” Kageyama says. He wanders over to Hinata’s shelves and points at an action movie. Could you put this in for me?”
“Sure.” Hinata answers. After the movie is in and started Hinata heads to bed after checking to see if there is anything else Kageyama needs.
Over breakfast the next morning Hinata starts to tell him about remerging with his body. “The thing is” He says while finishing his coffee. “You need to find something you want to live for.”
“What do you mean, of course I want to live. I still want to play volleyball.” Kageyama snorts.
“True.” Hinata says “But that is obviously not enough for you to join back up with your body. You really have to find something you can’t live without, something that is strong enough to pull you back to your body and make you want to get up.”
“Humm, I would have thought volleyball would have been enough.” Kageyama mumbled.
“We’ll find something.” Hinata says. “Now, I have the next few days off, is there anything you want to do?”
Kageyama shakes his head. “I pretty much only go to school and play volleyball. What else is there to do?”
Hinata laughs and says “Ok, it’s time to get you out and give you some new experiences. Maybe you’ll find what you are looking for.”
Hinata decides to take him to the Fair, which is in town for a few more days. As they start to walk around, Kageyama notices that people are staring at Hinata weirdly. Then he remembers that they can’t see him. When he brings that up to Hinata he just laugh and says “Oops, I forgot.”
He pulls out a Bluetooth ear bud and pops it in his ear and tucks his phone in his pocket. “There, now everyone will think I’m on the phone.” He says.
“That’s a really good idea.” Kageyama says impressed. “Do you do this a lot?”
Hinata looks over “Well, I see spirits all the time, but I’ve never taken one home with me before.” He says.
Kageyama blushes (how can he blush? He’s a spirit he thinks) and Hinata can see a tiny grin. “Now come on, what do you want to go on first?” he asks.
“I’ve never been to one of these before, why don’t you pick.” Kageyama says.
“Ok, let’s hit the big roller coaster first.” Hinata says. “Remember how to feel for me?”
Kageyama “reaches” out and finds him. “Yeah” he answers.
“Ok, keep ahold of me when we’re on rides and you’ll come along.” Hinata tells him.
“Ok” Kageyama says.
They spend the rest of the day riding everything that they lay their eyes on. Kageyama notices that he is starting to not “let go” of Hinata between rides. It just feels natural to be touching him. He shakes his head when Hinata turns to him and says “Hey, let’s ride that next.” And points at what looks like a large pink swan.
Kageyama raises his eyebrows and asks “What the hell is that and why is it so pink?
Hinata laughs and says “It’s supposed to be a “lovers” ride, but I just want to sit down and rest. Most of it is in the dark and it’ll be cooler.”
Kageyama looks hesitant, but agrees. He secretly is glad he’s a spirit at the moment, he doesn’t think he can handle it if anyone he knows saw him on something that …. that…. Pink.
Hinata leads them over and they get into the pink sawn. It starts to move and they are in dim lighting almost instantly. For a few minutes they are both quiet, Hinata because he’s resting and Kageyama because he’s staring at Hinata. “Hey, Hinata?” Kageyama starts.
“Mmmmm” Hinata replies.
“What if I can’t return to my body? What will I do?” Kageyama begins hesitantly.
“Why wouldn’t you be able to get back to your body?” Hinata asks. “There’s got to be something worth living for.”
Kageyama shakes his head “That’s the thing, I have lived for volleyball since I was in elementary school. I love it, but it doesn’t seem to be enough to bring me back. Even though I want to play again.”
“Well, do you have any family, friends, maybe a girlfriend?” Hinata asks.
“I have family, but we’re not very close. I don’t think I have any close friends, just teammates and I don’t have a partner. I have before but usually they just want to be with me because I’m well known.” Kageyama says.
Hinata reaches out and places his hand over where Kageyama’s is on the bench. They can’t actually touch each other, but it’s warm and tingly, for Kageyama. “You’ll find it, I promise.” Hinata says. “But for now, I’m here. They stay just like that for the rest of the ride.
Hinata took him all over town in the following week, they visit museums, the zoo, they go to a popular movie, and Hinata takes him to a volleyball game at his college. The players aren’t in the same league with Kageyama but they both have a good time. Hinata’s glad that Kageyama is a spirit at this moment because he keeps shouting “helpful” hints to the players on the court.
Hinata reaches out and “touches” Kageyama to get his attention. “Hey, sit down and just watch, you are driving me crazy jumping up and down constantly.” He says
Kageyama pouted a little (which made Hinata giggle a little) but sat down. “Sorry, I just miss playing” Kageyama said.
“I know, I thought you might get called back to your body if I took you to a game and felt all the emotions and stuff when you saw them play.” Hinata says.
Kageyama looked at him for a moment before he said “Yeah, but I don’t think volleyball is going to work to fix me.”
Hinata smiled and said “We’ll figure it out.”
“I hope so.” Kageyama sighed.
“So” Hinata started “What do you want to do after this?”
“Let’s just go back to your place, I kind of feel upset.” Kageyama responded.
“Alright” Hinata said and when the game was over led Kageyama back to the car.
Later that night as they were watching a movie in Hinata’s apartment Kageyama turned to him and said “I think you are my only friend. I’m not even alive and it’s the first time I’ve ever hand a friend.”
Hinata reached out and put his hand over where Kageyama’s laid on the couch. The tingle traveled up Kageyama’s arm. “You’re alive, you just need a reason to live. I’m glad I am here to help you.”
Kageyama tried to return the hand hold but his just passed through Hinata’s fingers. A few tears ran out of the corners of his eyes and he felt Hinata move closer and say “I’m here, just reach out and feel.”
Kageyama shuddered and did as Hinata suggested. Warmth spread through him quickly and he didn’t fell so hopeless. “Thanks”
“Anytime” Hinata said. They finished the movie and went to bed for the night, this time with Kageyama staying in Hinata’s room so he wouldn’t feel so alone.
The next Hinata had to return to work and Kageyama found himself reluctant to let him go. He had gotten used to Hinata being around and available. Hinata noticed him pouting on the couch and shook his head at him. “Come with me stupid, it’s not like anyone else can see you.” He said.
Kageyama frowned and said, “Don’t call me stupid. Are you sure it’ll be ok?”
“Yup” Hinata grinned “Let’s go.”
Over the next three weeks their days were the same. Kageyama went to work with Hinata in the mornings, he stayed with Hinata in while he ate lunch (usually in Kageyama’s hospital room) and then went home in the evening together and watched volleyball on TV or rented a different movie.
On the second morning of the fourth week Kageyama realized he was in love with Hinata, and he was terrified. “What if he never woke up? What if he died there in that hospital bed? What if Hinata didn’t love him back?”
He was quiet on the way to Hinata’s work that day. He wanted to tell Hinata how he felt, but somehow he felt lighter and it was harder to make his body do things. He figured he must have stayed up to late worrying about how Hinata might react to Kageyama’s confession.
At lunchtime Hinata asked him if he was feeling alright. He looked at him closely and then gasped “You’re getting lighter.” Hinata said. “That usually means you are starting to merge with your body again.”
Kageyama was hovering in the corner he had been in the first time he had seen Hinata. “Yeah, I was wondering what that feeling was” he said from a faraway sounding voice. “I think I found a reason to live.”
Hinata beamed at him and jumped up “I’m so glad! What finally made you realize it?” he asked.
“I think I’m in love with you.” Kageyama said in the same faraway voice.
Kageyama watched as disbelief flashed over Hinata’s face followed by a blush. “Oh” Hinata said. “Umm, are you sure?”
“Yeah” I’m sure he said in voice that was fading more. “I want to come back so I can actually hold you in my arms”
“Ok” Hinata said walking over to Kageyama’s body lying in bed. Kageyama felt as Hinata ran his hands through his hair and the tug towards his body was almost impossible to resist.
“I’ll be waiting right here when you wake up” Hinata said running one finger down Kageyama’s cheek before looking to the corner where Kageyama’s spirit was just barely visible. Hinata smiled and said “I’m here.” And Kageyama was gone.
Hinata blinked rapidly as tears flowed down his face. He knew what was going to happen and he wasn’t sure he could handle it. But he promised he would be here when Kageyama woke up. So he sat there for the next few hours. He was right there when Kageyama’s hand started to twitch. He was right there when Kageyama’s breathing became more rapid. He was right there when the heart monitor showed Kageyama’s heart speeding up. He was right there when Kageyama opened his eyes after two months in a coma.
And he was right there when Kageyama looked over and asked “Where am I? What happened? Who are you?”
Hinata managed to answer his questions before running out to get the doctors. As soon as he updated them on Kageyama’s condition he ran. Out of the hospital, down the road and far away from the memory of the guy he had fallen in love with. He knew it would happen, it always did. Spirits didn’t retain their memories if they were still tied to a body. But it didn’t help the hurt that Hinata felt in his chest.
The following week the newspaper ran a story on the hometown hero. Back from a coma and regaining strength. The article was filled with quotes about how he wanted to get back to training and play with his teammates again. There was no mention of anything else. Just Kageyama’s determination to overcome the injuries and get back to playing form.
Eighteen days later they found the man who had hired the shooter. He was a rival player who had never won against him before and blamed Kageyama for his defeats. Hinata slept a little easier knowing that Kageyama was safe again.
Four months and three days later on a sunny Saturday Kageyama was playing in his first game back from his recovery. The entire town had turned out to see their hero back in form. The gym was packed and there were reporters everywhere. Hinata purchased a ticket several rows up in the gym. Hopefully out of sight. Kageyama might not remember him but Hinata just couldn’t stay away.
Right from the start it was obvious that Kageyama was not on his game. His timing was off. He kept misconnecting with his teammates. His tosses were off and he seemed a little slow in his movements. The final straw came when he set of his spiker and turned to watch the play and found nobody there. The gym was deadly silent and everyone watched as Kageyama fell to his knees burying his head in his hands in frustration.
Hinata didn’t know why he did it and he can’t remember what made his body move, but he stood up and shouted “Kageyama, I’m here.” At the top of his lungs.
He watched horrified as Kageyama froze and looked towards him. Kageyama stared at him for a while with a confused expression on his face and then a dawning understanding lit in his eyes. “Hinata?” he called out.
“Yeah” Hinata said through tears. “I’m still here.”
Kageyama got up and walked over to the bleachers and motioned him down. Silence followed Hinata down the six bleachers he had to descend until he was standing in front of Kageyama.
“I remember.” Kageyama said wonderingly. “I remember everything”
He reached out and pulled Hinata into his arms and spun him around the gym. Camera flashes almost blinded them but they were too caught up in their own world. “I thought you had forgotten me.” Hinata said holding Kageyama’s face in his hands.
“I had” Kageyama said with his hands cupping Hinata’s on his face. “It all came back when I heard you say I’m here.”
Kageyama leaned down and kissed him there in front of everyone, this time the cameras didn’t stop taking pictures for several minutes. “I love you.” Kageyama said when he pulled back from Hinata.
“I love you too.” Hinata said in a shaky voice. “Now, go back out there and win. I’ll be right here when you’re done.”
Kageyama grinned and kissed him again. “Ok, don’t go far.”
“Nope” Hinata whispered to himself as he watched Kageyama run back onto the court. “I’ll always be here with you.”
