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Earth loves Mix. He doesn't know when it started. He doesn’t know how. And he certainly doesn't know why he fell for Mix. But that's just how it is, right? Some things come unexpectedly and all you can do is accept them. Just like how Earth feels about Mix. He never saw it coming but he embraced it wholeheartedly, loving Mix even without any certainty.
They’ve been close friends and BL partners for years now. They’ve faced highs and lows together, and each shared experience only strengthened their bond. Yet, with every laugh, every stolen glance, and every moment spent together, Earth felt himself falling deeper.
He would often find himself stealing glances at Mix, his heart racing with just a smile or a playful nudge. When Mix laughed, his eyes crinkling at the corners, Earth couldn't help but adore the younger.
But with every heartbeat that raced for Mix, there was an ache that came with it—a fear that his feelings would remain unsaid and unreciprocated.
This ache began as a small feeling, harmless and easy to ignore. But then, one incident changed everything.
"You're leaving already? Not joining us for lunch?" Earth asked as he sat before the mirror, his makeup artist carefully wiping off the remnants from the shoot. They had just wrapped up filming a video for the promotion of their new series, Ossan's Love Thailand.
Mix had already finished removing his makeup and was hurriedly packing his things, which Earth immediately noticed.
"No. I’m meeting someone for lunch," Mix answered nonchalantly, zipping his bag before pulling out his phone. He didn’t even glance in Earth’s direction.
Earth’s brows furrowed as he took a deep breath, closing his eyes momentarily to quell the familiar ache in his chest. When he looked back at the mirror, he saw Mix's reflection. The younger man was smiling, eyes gleaming as he looked at his phone.
"Who are you having lunch with?" Earth asked, his voice tinged with hurt but Mix didn't notice.
"Uhh..." Mix looked up, their eyes meeting through the mirror’s reflection. He flashed a bright smile, one that made Earth’s heart skip a beat. "It’s Ter. He just got back from abroad."
Time seemed to slow down for Earth. His breath hitched as he stared at Mix’s face, his expression radiating genuine happiness. There was a different sparkle in his eyes, one that Earth hadn’t seen before when they are together.
Before Earth could respond, Mix had already left, the room feeling emptier than it did just moments ago. Even the makeup artist who was attending to him had quietly slipped out, leaving Earth alone with his thoughts.
Earth's chest tightened as his hand instinctively moved to clutch it. It felt as if someone had reached past his ribs and grabbed his heart, squeezing it until he could barely breathe. His vision blurred, and he took in a shaky breath, struggling to steady himself as he walked towards the bathroom.
He wanted to be happy for Mix. He really did. But seeing Mix light up like that for someone else hurt more than he could’ve ever imagined. It was a harsh reminder that no matter how close they were, Mix’s heart was never his to begin with.
Earth gripped the edge of the sink, his knuckles turning white as he struggled to keep himself upright. His body trembled, every breath feeling like shattered glass scraping against his lungs. He squeezed his eyes shut, forcing himself to breathe through the pain, but it did little to ease the burning ache in his chest.
His reflection stared back at him, pale and broken.
His voice was barely a whisper, "When did it start hurting this much?"
Tears slipped down his face, mixing with the smeared makeup on his skin. The pain throbbed, sharp and unforgiving, echoing the words he could never bring himself to say. Words that stayed trapped inside, clawing at his throat.
His chest tightened, the familiar pressure growing unbearable. He coughed, once, twice, then again, each convulsion more violent than the last. His fingers pressed against his chest, desperate to ease the suffocating weight, but it was useless.
Something was lodged in his throat, scratching, tearing.
Earth choked, doubling over as he coughed again, this time covering his mouth with his hand. His breathing was ragged, shallow gasps echoing in the empty bathroom. When he finally pulled his hand away, his eyes widened in horror.
There, resting on his trembling palm, was a delicate daisy petal, its soft white edges stained with crimson blood.
His heart sank, fear twisting in his gut as the realization slowly dawned on him. The pain, the petals... it couldn’t be.
But deep down, Earth knew. Even if he refused to admit it, even if he tried to deny the truth, he knew exactly what this meant.
He was in love—so deeply, so hopelessly... that it was killing him from the inside out.
And there's no cure to it.
Earth had noticed how Mix frequently declined his invitations to go out. Mix always had an excuse—something he needed to do or somewhere he needed to be. Yet, Earth couldn't help but notice that Mix always seemed to be available whenever Ter asked him out.
And every time Earth saw the same location posted on both their stories, his chest would tighten, and an uncontrollable cough would escape his lips. It had become routine for him—the coughing that always brought with a petal of daisy.
At first, it was just one petal at a time. But gradually, it worsened... the petals multiplied.
One afternoon, Earth and Mix were strolling through the mall, looking to buy Valentine’s gifts. As they walked side by side, Mix’s attention was fixed on the displays, his eyes shining with curiosity. Earth, however, couldn’t keep his gaze from wandering to Mix, who walked just a step beside him.
A smile played on Earth’s lips. It had been so long since they last hung out like this. Mix was finally free today, so Earth made up an excuse, asking if Mix could help him shop. Earth’s eyes sparkled with joy, his fingers tightly clutching his disney princess pouch as his heart raced in his chest just from being near Mix.
He liked this moments of calmness, with no tightness in his chest or struggle to breathe.
"Shall we check out the shirts over there?" Earth asked, his voice light as he turned to Mix. But his smile faltered when he realized Mix was no longer walking beside him. He looked back and saw Mix lagging behind, eyes glued to his phone.
Earth walked toward Mix, his steps heavy. "Who are you talking to?" he softly asked as he smiled.
Mix looked up, and Earth’s heart did that familiar flip, his heart racing just from the way Mix looked at him.
"Earth... can I leave now?" Mix asked hesitantly.
Earth’s shoulders dropped at the question and his smile faded. "Huh? Why?"
"We barely looked around... we haven’t bought anything yet." Earth’s confusion was evident in his voice.
"Ter needs me."
Earth was speechless. A lump formed in his throat as he felt the familiar pain in his chest. It was getting harder to breathe.
"Why?" Earth forced himself to speak, even as the words struggled to come out, blocked by something lodged in his throat.
"He seems mad, Earth." Mix’s eyes were restless, his worry palpable. "I don’t really know, but... he said he needs me."
Their eyes met, and Earth saw the anxiety and fear in Mix’s gaze. It was clear that Mix was concerned about Ter—so much so that he couldn’t stand the thought of upsetting him.
Earth placed a hand over his chest as he forced himself to smile. He swallowed the petal, the blood, the agony of being rejected once again.
He swallowed the feelings he could never express.
Earth’s voice cracked. "Go to him."
Mix’s face brightened, his eyes sparkling with relief. "Thank you, Earth. I’ll make it up to you. I promise."
With that, Mix turned his back and walked away, leaving Earth standing alone.
Earth remained rooted to the spot, clutching his pouch tightly as he watched Mix walk further and further away. He didn’t dare blink, enduring the urge to cough as the petals threatened to spill out.
He watched as his love slowly slipped from his grasp.
His body felt heavy as he made his way out of the mall, dragging his feet until he reached his car. Once inside, the tears finally fell. His body shook with sobs as his coughs grew more violent.
But this time, it wasn’t just petals that came out. Whole daisies tumbled from his mouth, their delicate white petals stained with blood.
He clutched his chest, his breathing ragged as each cough tore at his heart. The flowers kept coming, each one a cruel reminder of the love he could never have.
Earth squeezed his eyes shut, tears flowing freely. The pain was overwhelming.
And with every petal he coughed up, Earth felt his own heart slowly withering away, just like the daisies stained with his blood.
He knew he was running out of time.
It was Valentine’s Day. Earth stood outside Mix’s condo, a cake in his hands and his heart pounding in his chest. He knew Mix’s passcode, a small privilege from all the years of friendship they shared. He smiled softly, imagining the surprise on Mix’s face.
After all, Mix had promised to make it up to him, right?
Earth took a deep breath, steadying his racing heartbeat. Today, he would finally confess. Maybe—just maybe—Mix would finally see him, finally understand how deeply Earth cared for him... Before it's too late.
He punched in the passcode, the door unlocking with a soft click. Carefully, he nudged it open, his smile widening as he stepped inside.
"Mix, Happy Val—"
The words died in his throat.
The cake slipped from his trembling fingers, landing with a dull thud on the floor, splattering frosting across his shoes.
There, just a few feet away, stood Ter and Mix, locked in a kiss.
Mix’s arms were around Ter’s neck, their bodies close, faces inches apart as their lips met. Earth’s heart shattered into a million pieces.
His chest tightened, the pain so intense that he couldn’t breathe. His vision blurred as his knees wobbled beneath him. The familiar itch in his throat grew unbearable, and before he could stop it, a violent cough escaped his lips.
Petals flew from his mouth, pale white daisies splattered with bright red blood, falling onto the floor beside the ruined cake.
The sound caught their attention. Mix’s eyes widened in shock as he pulled away from Ter, his face paling as he turned to see Earth standing at the doorway, broken and trembling.
"Earth..." Mix’s voice wavered, eyes flicking to the petals and blood at Earth’s feet. "What... what’s happening?"
But Earth didn’t stay to explain. He turned on his heel and ran.
His vision was clouded by tears, his breath coming out in ragged gasps. He didn’t care where he was going, he just needed to get away.
Away from the image of Mix and Ter.
Away from the pain tearing his heart apart.
He stumbled down the stairs, barely able to see through the tears that refused to stop. His chest burned, every breath feeling like shards of glass slicing through him.
Reaching his car, he fumbled with the keys before finally getting in. His hands shook as he gripped the steering wheel, his heart racing. He slammed his foot on the gas, the tires screeching as he sped away.
The world around him blurred. All he could see was Mix kissing Ter. He heard Mix’s voice echoing in his head. "Ter needs me."
A strangled sob escaped his lips, his vision swimming as more tears fell. The pain was unbearable, his chest so tight he could barely breathe. Another cough wracked his body, more bloodied petals falling onto his lap.
He didn’t see the red light. He didn’t see the truck speeding through the intersection.
All he heard was the deafening crash. Metal crumpled, glass shattered, and Earth’s body was thrown forward, his head slamming against the steering wheel.
His vision went black.
The world around him faded, the pain slowly numbing as his body grew cold. His fingers went limp.
His last thought was of Mix’s smile.
And then, everything went silent.
The daisy petals on his lap fluttered, stained crimson with his blood.
Earth remembered waking up in the hospital, his body aching and weak. The first thing he saw was Mix’s worried face hovering over him, eyes red and swollen with tears. The sight made Earth’s chest tighten.
They never talked about that day—about the kiss he saw, about the bloodied daisies that fell from his mouth, about why he ran. Instead, they pretended as if nothing happened. Mix stayed by his side. They remained casual, acting as if nothing had changed between them.
But it only made things worse.
The more Mix acted like everything was normal, the more Earth’s disease grew worse. The petals multiplied, and the pain in his chest became unbearable. Earth knew that if he continued to stay near Mix, it would eventually kill him.
And there was no cure for Hanahaki disease.
If he were going to die, he didn’t want Mix to see it. He didn’t want Mix to cry because of him.
If he were to disappear, he wanted to do it quietly, without causing the people around him any more pain.
So before he could fully recover, Earth told Mix that he was breaching his contract and going abroad. Mix protested but Earth remained firm. Eventually, Mix gave in but the look of hurt in his eyes haunted Earth long after.
Earth never went abroad.
Instead, he went to Suphan, his hometown. He bought a house far from his relatives so no one would know he was there.
He isolated himself, ready to die alone.
But death never came.
Maybe the death people spoke of wasn’t a literal one. Maybe it was the numbness that followed the pain—a heart breaking over and over until it became nothing but a hollow shell.
Because that’s what Earth feels every day. Waking up alone, thinking of Mix, the pain would return, sharp and unrelenting. It felt like his heart was being ripped apart repeatedly, so much that he wished he would just die for real.
He continued to cough up daisies streaked with blood.
But as the days turned into months and the months into years, the coughing became less frequent. Where once he would cough up entire daisies, now only petals would come out.
Until one day… he realized he wasn’t coughing anymore. His chest no longer tightened with pain.
Now, four years have passed. Earth stood on a train, staring at the man he once loved more than life itself. They were face to face, just like the day they had met again after losing contact back when Earth was still in college.
But this time, they weren’t on a train in Thailand. They were now on a train in Japan.
And standing before him was Mix.
They stared at each other, time seeming to freeze as familiarity danced in their eyes.
"Hi, P’Earth. How are you?" Mix’s voice was uncertain.
Earth continued to look at him, memories flashing before his eyes. It was just like that day on the train, all those years ago.
The same words. The same person.
It was like déjà vu.
"You’re alone?" Earth asked, straightening up to mask his surprise.
Mix nodded. "Yeah... Uhh... P’Earth?"
"Hm?" Earth turned his full attention to Mix, his eyes never leaving his face.
Mix bit his lower lip, a habit Earth knew meant he was nervous. "Would you... would you like to grab some coffee? Maybe catch up?" Mix’s eyes were hopeful, his voice wavering.
A slow smile spread across Earth’s face as he looked at Mix. After all these years, nothing about him had changed.
Earth felt his heart race, the familiar thump echoing in his chest. For the first time in a long while, he felt...
Alive.
As they stood there, lost in each other’s eyes, Earth remembered something he once read:
The Meeting Twice Theory...
“If someone is truly meant to be in your life, you'll cross paths with them more than once.
It's life's way of bringing you back together, even after you've gone your separate ways.
You'll meet them twice;
From a different time,
From a different season,
When you're both finally ready.
When the timing is right, the Universe will orchestrate random reunions.
People meant to be in each other’s lives will find their way back.”
And here they were, meeting again.
Mix’s eyes softened, his shoulders relaxing as Earth’s smile grew wider. The years had changed them both, but the connection between them was still there. Unbroken.
Earth nodded. "Sure. I'd like that."
Mix’s face brightened, his smile the same as Earth remembered—warm, genuine, breathtaking.
They walked off the train together, side by side, just like they used to.
As they stepped out into the bustling streets of Tokyo, Earth felt the cold winter breeze against his face. He glanced at Mix beside him, who was looking at the city lights with awe.
Earth’s heart raced again, a familiar warmth spreading through his chest. But there was no pain. No petals. No blood.
Maybe this time, they will get it right.
Because sometimes, love finds its way back. Even after it was lost. Even after it died.
Because even when your love dies, it never truly leaves your heart. It stayed.
The Universe had given them a second chance. The Universe was cruel like that, bringing them together again when Earth least expected it. When he thought he had finally let go.
But had he really?
Or did he just bury his feelings deep enough that he convinced himself they were gone?
He remembered all those days in Suphan, living alone, coughing petals and blood, waiting for death to take him. He remembered the pain, the suffocating ache that gripped his chest every time he thought of Mix.
Maybe he did die, in a way.
Maybe a part of him died when he chose to walk away. When he chose to let Mix go.
But the heart was a stubborn thing.
It kept on beating. Kept on loving. Even when it wasn’t supposed to.
He took a deep breath, letting the cold air fill his lungs. Then he looked at Mix, who was still laughing, his eyes bright and full of life.
At that moment, Earth made a choice.
Maybe this time love was worth the risk.
Maybe love was worth trying again.
Maybe... just maybe... they were meant to find their way back to each other.