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© March 2001, monkee
Seven settled back against the holographic Chakotay's chest and closed her eyes. He was in a pre-programmed sleep cycle. She was not entirely comfortable on the edge of the couch, but she enjoyed the sensation of his rhythmic breathing against her back. She understood, now, why humans liked to sleep with each other. It was...peaceful.
After a while, she began to relax and feel a bit drowsy. She sighed without entirely understanding why, then drifted off to sleep.
~*~
"Seven."
She stirred, then gradually began to awaken. She was always a bit disoriented when she awoke after sleeping. Regenerating was much more efficient. When her regeneration cycles were complete, she was instantly alert.
"Seven."
A voice. Chakotay's voice, but...different. Cold. Angry. She was confused for just a moment, for she knew she had not yet programmed him to have an argument with her. Then, abruptly, she understood. It was true, what she'd read. There really was the sensation of sinking in her stomach. Her eyes flew open.
Chakotay – the real Chakotay – was standing before her. She could still feel the programmed one behind her, beginning to stir awake as well. She struggled to her feet, evading the possessive grasp of her holographic love interest. "Don't go," it said, drowsily. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a flash of red. The dress. She looked down at it, and suddenly felt as if it exposed more of her body than it actually did.
"Computer," she said, "End program." Her voice was shaking, for some reason, but she decided it was irrelevant at the moment.
The dimly lit quarters, the couch, and the other Chakotay shimmered away. Mercifully, the dress did as well, replaced by her regular dermal suit. The starkness of the holo-grid was a jarring contrast to the softness of her quarters. And then there was Chakotay. She observed that his hands were clenched into fists at his side, but looking at his face, she found that she could not read his expression at all. "I tried to hail you," he said, flatly. "You didn't respond."
"Commander," she said, anguished, "I..."
"Seven," he interrupted, shortly. "I can't talk to you about this right now."
She could read his expression now. She might have before, but she had never seen him this furious. She thought, perhaps, that she had never seen anyone this furious. His nostrils were flared, and he was breathing rapidly. He slapped his communicator with more force than was necessary.
"Chakotay to Janeway," he said.
"Janeway here," she responded. At the sound of the Captain's voice, Seven felt a wave of something. Guilt? Regret?
"Seven of Nine needs to speak to you right away in your quarters," Chakotay said. She noticed, absently, that his voice was shaking, too.
"In my...what's wrong with her?" The Captain sounded confused, then concerned. "Chakotay, I can't leave the bridge right now. The missiles..."
"I'm returning to the bridge right now. Send Harry to astrometrics," he said, tersely. "Captain, it's important."
"All right," she said, with no hesitation. "I'm on my way. Janeway out."
Chakotay turned his attention, and his cold gaze, back to her. "I want you to go tell the Captain what you've been doing here. She'll be able to talk to you about it, and explain to you why it's WRONG." He was speaking in an odd way, with his teeth clenched together, and his volume level was beginning to rise. He stopped, and struggled to regain control. "I will speak to you later," he said. "You're dismissed."
She nodded, because she could not speak. She turned and left the holodeck without even seeing the arch. Her eyes were wet, but she knew that her optical implants were not malfunctioning. She wanted, badly, to run, but that would draw attention to herself, and that was the last thing she wanted. She passed a small conference room and considered locking herself inside. She felt an almost overwhelming urge to curl up in a ball and sit under a table. But the Captain was expecting her, so it was not an option.
She arrived at the Captain's door at the same time the Captain did. She tried to control her facial muscles, and keep her expression even and professional, but found that it was impossible. Her face was twisted almost painfully, and she had to squeeze her eyes shut to keep the tears from falling. The Captain quickly keyed in her code and pulled her inside. As the doors closed behind them, she turned and stumbled into the Captain's arms. A sound emerged from her own throat that she had never heard before, but she recognized it as a sob. The sound upset her almost as much as everything else that had happened in the last five minutes.
The Captain held her tightly and rubbed her back. "God, Seven," she said, and oddly enough, she seemed to be crying, too. "What's wrong? What's wrong?"
~*~
Chakotay pressed the door chime and waited for a response. Agitated, he bounced on the balls of his feet. He'd done what needed to be done on the bridge, and now Tuvok had command and Harry and Icheb were manning astrometrics. Everything was under control but him. It occurred to him that he had no idea what he was going to say to Seven. What the hell could he say?
The door opened and Kathryn stood there, looking distracted and distressed.
"Where is she?" he asked, without preamble.
She didn't move aside to let him in. Instead, she glanced over her shoulder and stood in the doorway, blocking his entrance. "She's in my bathroom," she said, quietly. "And I don't think she'll be out anytime soon."
"I have to talk to her," he said. He kept his voice low, too, so that no one passing by would overhear him, but he knew he still sounded angry. "We need to clear the air."
"Not now, Chakotay," she said, firmly.
"Kathryn..." he started to argue.
She stopped him. "Have you ever been a teen-age girl, Chakotay?" she asked.
"Uh...no," he was forced to admit. "But..."
"Well I have," she said. "Trust me, Chakotay. Leave it until tomorrow. She needs time."
He opened his mouth to protest, but she stilled him by putting her hand on his arm. "Please," she entreated him.
He opened his mouth again, then shut it. He sighed. Maybe she was right. He probably needed some time to gather his thoughts, too.
"All right," he said.
She flashed him a quick, sympathetic smile. "Thank you," she said, then retreated back into her quarters.
He stared at the door for several moments before walking away.
~*~
Janeway walked into Chakotay's quarters when the door swished open in response to her chime. It took her eyes several seconds to adjust to the dim lighting, then she saw Chakotay getting up off the floor. The objects from his medicine bundle were spread out on the carpet.
"I'm sorry," she said. "Am I interrupting..."
"No," he replied. "I was just finishing. It's all right."
They stood awkwardly for a moment, then their eyes met, and they both laughed, nervously.
"God, what a mess," she said.
"I know," he agreed. "You were right to stop me from talking to her, earlier. I'm much calmer, now. Still mad as hell, but at least I'm under control. Is she still in your bathroom?"
"No," she sighed. "I imagine she's crying in her own bathroom now." At his expression of confusion, she continued. "I've assigned her quarters. B'Elanna can rig up a regeneration chamber tomorrow. It's past time that she had a place of her own. That much is obvious."
"And have you confined her to those quarters?" he asked, snorting. It came out angrier than he would have liked, but it seemed to him that Seven was being rewarded for her reprehensible behavior.
"No," she said. "I think she's been humiliated enough for one day."
He found himself sputtering with rage, the calm he'd found in his vision quest evaporating instantly. "SHE'S been humiliated? Kathryn, she made a COPY of me to play with on the holodeck!"
"Chakotay..." she began, firmly, but then she stopped. She could certainly understand why he was angry. She sighed. "Let's talk about it, please?" She gestured towards the couch. "Can we sit down?"
He let out a strong, deep breath. "Of course," he said.
They settled in, side by side, on the couch. "It's really the Doctor's fault," she began, "sort of. About two years ago, he started coaching her on her socialization skills. He used holographic representations of the crew and developed scenarios for her to master. Polite professional discourse, party banter – that sort of thing. It actually makes a lot of sense, if you think about it."
"Humph," he said, but nodded reluctantly.
"I actually found out about it, and let it go," she continued. "It violates regulations, but the scenarios were harmless, and Seven's situation is unique. And the lessons seemed to be doing her some good."
"I suppose," he said, wryly. "But how did she get from 'Social Graces' to 'Sleeping with the First Officer?'
"I'm not sure," Janeway sighed. "I think she didn't even realize that what she was doing was inappropriate. I honestly don't think she even considered any alternative options, other than the crew."
"Has she...been intimate with him?" he asked.
"No," she replied. "It hadn't gone that far, yet."
Chakotay sighed, visibly relieved. "Well, THAT'S something, anyway."
"I've explained to her why it's considered unethical," Janeway said. "She understands that what she did was wrong, and she's deleted the character. And Chakotay, she's so sorry, and so embarrassed. I hope when you speak to her, you'll be...kind."
"Of course," he said, sighing. He rolled his eyes. "God," added, "my head's been spinning all day. I don't know WHAT to think."
Janeway considered him from across the couch. "You know," she said, "she's a very attractive woman. I think a lot of men would be flattered."
Chakotay grimaced. "In a sense, I suppose," he said. "But even though I like Seven, and think she's come a hell of a long way – she's still twenty years younger than me, and that's just chronologically. You were right, earlier. She's so much like a teenager, and that's just not what I'm looking for at this stage of my life. It wouldn't be much different than dating Naomi!"
Janeway smirked. "That could be arranged. I've heard Naomi has quite a crush on you..."
Chakotay groaned and rubbed his forehead in despair.
"Well," Janeway amended, "it's between you and Icheb."
Chakotay snorted. "May the better man win." He stood up, and started pacing. He'd calmed down considerably, but she could see that he was still exasperated and edgy. She stood to go, figuring he'd work through it somehow.
As they walked to the door, she speculated, "If you stop to think about it, Chakotay, who else would she choose? You're everything she could have wanted – kind, gentle, easy-going, attractive, non-threatening, yet a little mysterious...I can't really fault her for her taste."
He took her arm and pulled her slightly toward him. "So what you're saying..." he said, angrily...except she could see that he wasn't really angry. He stepped close to her, and brought his face to within inches of hers. "What you're saying," he repeated, his eyes twinkling, "is that you find me attractive."
She had to laugh. He was incorrigible. "Maybe a little," she said, rolling her eyes.
He didn't loosen his hold on her arm, or move away. He fixed her with a smoldering, but amused look. "Good," he said, his voice low.
God, the man was sexy. She suppressed the urge to push him against the wall and kiss the hell out of him. "Good night, Chakotay," she said wryly, extracting herself from his grasp.
He didn't respond, except to nod once, and grin. She forced herself to walk out the door, then shook her head, chuckling, when it closed behind her.
As she headed back to her own quarters, she allowed herself just one flash of sincere regret that she'd made Seven delete the holographic dream Chakotay before she'd gotten a good, long look at him. In a strictly official capacity, of course...
The End