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2025-02-19
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2025-10-05
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Letters in a Locker

Summary:

Reaching her locker, she spun the dial to her combination and pulled it open. Just as she reached for her books, something caught her eye—a small envelope sticking out from the side of the locker door. It was plain white, sealed with a small red heart sticker. No name. No indication of who it was from.

Uzi blinked. 𝘐𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴… 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦?

Chapter 1: Important info & Notes

Summary:

This is MUST READ stuff if you want to understand this universe and everything. If you want, though, you can go ahead and read the prologue then come back if you wanna understand this AU more. Thanks!

Chapter Text

This is an explanation of the AU:

  • Still takes place on copper-9, but if the absolute solver didn’t exist, and wasn’t post-apocalyptic. Instead, it’s just a normal, functioning society.  

  • Everyone are drones! Not humans! But they have more human-like characteristics than in the show. Like for example, they don’t eat or have food in the show, but in this AU they eat and js again are more human-like. I don’t really talk abt their “systems shutting down” and shit like that, and also I’m not gonna use words like “optics” for eyes that’s js extra 💀. 

  • NOTE instead of the word “person,” the word “drone/drones” is used. And instead of blood, it’s oil. But again since the characters are more human-like ig I do use the word “skin,” but like I’m assuming they have “synthetic skin” cuz that js makes sense.  

  • One thing though is the murder drones are basically vampires in this universe. Honestly I’m trying to think of a better word than “murder drones” and I don’t wanna use the word vampires. If yall have any ideas that’d be great, but for now I’ll js call them ‘disassembly drones.’ EDIT: (7/1/25) I decided to just call them disassembly drones throughout the story. It’ll make more sense as you read it, jsyk.

  • NOTE the fact that the murder drones are well, murder drones, isn’t relevant until later. But trust me it IS important!   

  • Some background on Uzi - her mom’s dead, but like actually. And her dad has his door business, but had to travel a lot cuz of it, so Uzi constantly changed schools and stuff. I’m gonna be blunt though, I’m not gonna make her have to move schools halfway through cuz I feel like that’s stupid and atp I might as well restart it, so no way am I doing that.  

  • N kinda has more trust issues in this AU compared to the show. But again not changing his whole character - he’s js way too trusting when first meeting people in the show (like when he believes Uzi isn’t a worker drone and he js immediately believes her when she says that js so he won’t kill her 💀) and I js don’t think that’d work for this AU. When he gets to know people (or drones ig) he lets his guard down a lot more than he maybe should.   

  • I’m really big on character development so this story is kinda “slow” paced ig. But it’s also a Nuzi slow burn and there def will be moments throughout it  

  • I love headcannons so if I include any I’ll be sure to note. But I don’t mean like I’m changing the characters entirely that’s stupid. May make a whole page or a separate work js for headcannons too so if you wanna read it go ahead.

 


You can js skim over this next part idrc, not important to the story, js some ‘author's notes’ ig:

I couldn’t find any Nuzi fics that weren’t either poorly written (sounds like a 13 year old wrote them 😭🤚), completely changed the characters/the species of them (like I’m trying to read it for Murderdrones, not humans or dragons. What’s with all the dragon fics btw??), js completely smutty (like bro I don’t wanna read smut of minors that’s so weird 💀), or had extremely poor grammar with typos. Some of the AU ones weren’t bad stories necessarily, they js changed the characters, like making Uzi shy or making N some type of “bad boy” 😭 also I really don’t like the OC inserts. I JUST WANNA READ IT FOR THE ACTUAL CHARACTERS 💀💀.  Ok I probably js sound really picky tbh.

So I decided I was gonna write my own. Pretty excited for how this is gonna turn out.

ALSO I wrote a bunch of it while I was waiting for my ao3 account to get approved, so they’ll be super fast and frequent updates. I won’t js disappear halfway through the story and never come back I promise 😭🤚

Chapter 2: Prologue

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The school was eerily silent at this hour, long after the last bell had rung and the students and staff had gone home. The dim, flickering hallway lights cast long shadows against the lockers, the usual hum of activity replaced by an unsettling stillness. The only sound was the faint buzz of electricity in the walls and the occasional creak of the building settling in the night.

 

A lone drone moved cautiously through the empty corridors, as quick and as silently as possible. His posture was tense, his eyes darting from side to side as he scanned for any sign of movement. Every step he took was deliberate, each footfall as quiet as he could make it against the tile floor. He was hyper-aware of the quiet, of the way even the softest noise seemed amplified in the emptiness of the school.

 

Reaching a classroom door, he paused, glancing around one final time before gripping the handle. Slowly, carefully, he turned it, pushing the door open just enough to slip inside without making a sound. The room was dark, the only illumination coming from the faint glow of the hallway lights through the small window on the door. Rows of empty desks stood like silent sentinels, the teacher’s desk sitting at the front of the room, an authoritative presence even in the absence of its owner.

 

His eyes locked onto the desk as he crept forward, his movements precise and calculated. He reached out, fingers curling around the drawer handle before sliding it open. The wood groaned slightly, and he froze, his breath catching as he listened. Nothing. Exhaling a quiet sigh of relief, he continued his search, rifling through the contents with growing urgency. Papers, office supplies, lesson plans—none of it was what he needed.

 

“Where is it…” he muttered under his breath, his voice barely above a whisper.

 

His fingers brushed against something thick, a bound book. He pulled it out and quickly flipped it open, his eyes rapidly scanning the pages. The attendance and grade book.

 

A small smirk tugged at the corner of his expression. Found it.

 

Wasting no time, he placed it on the desk and grabbed a pen from a nearby cup. He flipped through the pages rapidly, looking for his name. There it was—his attendance records, littered with absences, and his grades, a sea of zeros and failing marks. Unacceptable.

 

With practiced ease, he pressed the pen to the page and began altering the records. His absences became presents, his zeros transformed into passing—no, excellent—grades. The ink bled onto the paper smoothly, blending seamlessly with the original writing. He knew they wouldn’t notice. Not now. Not this late in the year.

 

The smirk deepened as he leaned back slightly, surveying his handiwork. Perfect.

 

A quiet satisfaction settled over him as he admired his work. Every mark, every alteration, seamless. No one would ever suspect a thing. With careful precision, he returned the attendance book to its place, smoothing out any disturbed papers and ensuring the drawer slid back exactly as it had been. No detail could be overlooked. It had to be perfect.

 

He picked up the pen and placed it back in its holder, aligning it just as it was before. Taking one last look around, he confirmed that nothing seemed out of place. A pleased smirk lingered on his face as he turned away from the desk.

 

Moving toward the door, he stepped lightly, but this time with a bit more confidence. The hardest part was over. He had done it. Now, all that was left was to leave the way he had come, slipping back into the night unnoticed.

 

The school remained silent, the dim lights casting long shadows across the walls and floors as he retraced his path. But just as he neared the exit, something moved.

 

A blur—quick, almost imperceptible—darted past the edge of his vision, swallowed by the darkness before he could register what it was.

 

He froze.

 

His breath caught in his throat, his body stiffening instinctively. His eyes darted to the spot where the movement had been, but the hallway was empty. The silence pressed in on him, heavier now, suffocating.

 

His fingers curled into his palms as he forced himself to move. He turned sharply, choosing to head in the opposite direction. His footsteps, still quiet, had lost their careful ease. Now, they were quicker, more urgent.

 

His mind raced.

 

I’m just imagining things. It’s nothing. Just the dark playing tricks on me.

 

Then he heard it.

 

Footsteps.

 

Not his own.

 

A second pair, just behind him, keeping perfect pace with his own.

 

His heart pounded. His breath quickened. Every instinct screamed at him to run, but he refused to break into a sprint. That would mean admitting something was really there. That would make it real.

 

Calm down. You’re being paranoid.

 

He swallowed hard and glanced over his shoulder.

 

Nothing.

 

The hallway was empty, the same as before.

 

A shaky exhale left him, tension slowly easing from his shoulders. He had worked himself up for nothing. Just nerves. He’d get out of here, go home, and laugh about this later.

 

But just as he turned forward again, movement stirred in the darkness ahead.

 

A figure stepped out from the shadows, into the pale moonlight streaming through a nearby window.

 

Tall. Unmoving. Featureless in the dim glow, save for one thing.

 

A wide grin, sharp fangs glinting in the cold light.

 

His breath hitched. His entire body locked in place.

 

He could see nothing else—just that gleaming, eerie smile.

 

There was no way he was sticking around to find out what the hell that thing was.

 

Without hesitation, he spun on his heel and bolted, his legs carrying him as fast as they possibly could. Panic surged through him, drowning out every rational thought except one: Run.

 

Behind him, he could hear it—metal scraping against the floor, sprinting footsteps pounding in pursuit. It was chasing him.

 

His mind raced just as fast as his feet. What the hell is that thing?! It looked like a normal drone, but those teeth—no drone had teeth like that. No one should have teeth like that. Maybe—maybe this was a prank. Some sick joke. Maybe it was just some idiot messing with him, trying to scare him.

 

But he wasn’t about to take that chance.

 

His breath came in sharp, shallow gasps, he felt like he was overheating from the exertion. He had to get out. He needed to get out.

 

Then, up ahead—an exit.

 

An emergency door stood at the end of the hall, a beacon of salvation in the dimly lit corridor. His body surged forward, pushing every ounce of energy he had left into reaching it. The thing behind him wasn’t slowing down. If anything, it was getting closer.

 

He slammed into the door, shoving it open with all his strength.

 

The emergency alarm didn’t go off.

 

For half a second, his mind blanked.

 

What?

 

That wasn’t right. Emergency doors were supposed to trigger an alarm. That’s how they worked. But then again—it was after school hours. Maybe the system was shut off?

 

Ridiculous.

 

Not that he was about to complain. He stumbled outside into the cool night air, his breath coming in heavy, ragged gulps. His legs trembled from the adrenaline, but he was safe now. It was over.

 

Or so he thought.

 

Something was wrong.

 

The door never slammed shut behind him.

 

A sinking feeling twisted in his gut.

 

Slowly, hesitantly, he turned his head.

 

His eyes widened in horror.

 

A claw—long, razor-sharp—had curled around the edge of the door, holding it open. Metal scraped against metal as it dug into the frame, anchoring the figure in place. The alleyway was dim, but the courtyard beyond was bathed in pale moonlight. If he could just—

 

Before he could move, before he could even think to move, the figure lunged.

 

A blur of shadow and fangs collided with him, slamming him to the ground. He barely had time to scream before a piercing pain shot through his body.

 

Teeth sank into metal and synthetic flesh alike, puncturing deep.

 

His scream was cut off, choked out by the sickening sound of steel tearing, of wires snapping, of artificial sinew being ripped apart by a monstrous bite.

 

The sounds of struggle lasted only a moment.

 

Then, silence.

 

The night swallowed everything whole.

Notes:

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 3: The Letter

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The crowded hallway buzzed with chatter and the occasional sound of slamming locker doors. Uzi sighed, adjusting the strap of her backpack as she weaved her way through the swarm of students. She wasn’t exactly used to this school yet—new hallways, unfamiliar faces, and the general feeling of being an outsider still clung to her like an awkward weight. She wished that her Dad didn’t have to make them move all the time for his stupid job - she was so tired of this. The constant moving was exhausting, and having to make new friends every time made it feel like a chore - a burden even.

 

She hadn’t made any real friends so far, just a few drones who would give her a nod in passing or sit next to her when there were no other seats.

 

  Reaching her locker, she spun the dial to her combination and pulled it open. Just as she reached for her books, something caught her eye—a small envelope sticking out from the side of the locker door. It was plain white, sealed with a small red heart sticker. No name. No indication of who it was from.

 

Uzi blinked. Is this… for me?

 

She looked around, as if expecting someone to be watching, waiting for her reaction. But no one seemed to be paying her any mind. Cautiously, she pulled the envelope free and turned it over in her hands. She wasn’t exactly the type to get love letters—scratch that, she wasn’t even the type to get any letters. She barely knew anyone here. So who in their right mind would be writing something like this for her?

 

Curiosity gnawed at her. Tearing the envelope open, she unfolded the letter inside, her eyes scanning the neat, well thought out handwriting.

 

-

 

Dear V,

   I don’t know if I’ll ever have the courage to tell you this in person, but I think you should know—you're amazing. You’re strong, confident, and you have this way of carrying yourself that I can’t stop admiring. You make everything seem effortless, even when I know it’s not. I love the way you smirk when you think no one’s looking. I love the fire in your eyes when you get competitive.

 

I know we don’t talk much (or at all, really), but you make my day every time I see you. Maybe this is cheesy, maybe you’ll laugh and throw this away, but I just wanted you to know—someone out there thinks you're incredible.

 

Love,

Your Secret Admirer

 

-

 

Uzi felt a warmth creep up her neck as she finished reading, her heart doing some weird, awkward flip in her chest.

 

Wait…

 

Her eyes flicked back to the beginning of the letter.

 

Dear V

 

Her stomach dropped.

 

"This isn’t for me," she muttered under her breath, rereading the name again just to make sure she wasn’t imagining things.

 

V. Whoever that was.

 

She felt a mix of emotions all at once—relief, embarrassment, secondhand giddiness from how sweet the letter was, and mostly the crushing realization that she had just been holding onto a love letter that wasn’t even meant for her.

 

Uzi groaned internally, gripping the paper in her hands as she debated what to do. Should she put it back? Track down whoever “V” is? Ignore it and pretend this never happened?

 

Before she could think of a plan, the shrill ring of the bell jolted her back to reality.

 

"Ugh—seriously?" she huffed, stuffing the letter into her pocket and slamming her locker shut. No time to figure it out now.

 

Pushing the thoughts aside for the moment, she turned on her heel and rushed off to her next class.

 

-

 

Uzi skidded into the classroom just as the door was swinging shut behind her, the weight of her backpack nearly dragging her backward. The teacher, Mr. Calloway, a lanky man with perpetually tired eyes, had already begun speaking when he stopped mid-sentence, glancing over at her.

 

"Miss Doorman," he said, raising an eyebrow. "You're late."

 

Uzi winced. Great. Just what I needed.

 

"Uh—yeah. Sorry. Won't happen again," she said quickly, ducking her head and making her way toward her seat before he could press further.

 

A few students snickered. Others barely looked up from their desks.

 

"See that it doesn’t," Mr. Calloway replied dryly before continuing his lecture.

 

Uzi let out a quiet sigh of relief as she dropped into her seat. She barely had time to dwell on the whole love-letter-that-wasn’t-for-her thing before the teacher clapped his hands together.

 

"Alright, class. Today, you'll be working in pairs," he announced, grabbing a stack of papers from his desk. "You'll be answering some discussion questions on the book we’ve been reading the past week: The Scarlet Letter. Your responses should be thoughtful and well-supported. This will count toward your participation grade." His tone of voice was unamused, each word feeling drawn out as he spoke.

 

Uzi barely held in a groan. Partners?

 

Mr. Calloway started rattling off names, pairing students up. Uzi only half-listened until she heard—

 

"Uzi Doorman and Lizzy Summers."

 

She turned her head toward the front of the room. Lizzy?

 

Sitting a few rows ahead of her, Lizzy Summers flipped her blonde hair over her shoulder before standing up gracefully, smoothing out her cheerleading uniform in the process. She was the kind of girl who always had a bright, polished appearance—hair done, nails perfect, makeup flawless, even at school. She had this air of effortless popularity, the kind of girl who was always surrounded by other drones.

 

But… maybe that wasn’t such a bad thing. Since Lizzy was so popular, maybe she knew who V was. She knew practically everyone in the school, or at least drones that stood out, so it wasn’t such a far fetched idea. Plus, this so called ‘V’ was popular enough to get a literal love letter, so it only made sense.

 

As Uzi approached, Lizzy gave her a once-over, a slight smirk tugging at the corner of her lips.

 

"Well, this should be interesting," she mused.

 

Uzi plopped down into the chair beside her. "Yeah. Riveting."

 

Lizzy giggled and flipped through the worksheet. "Okay, let’s see… First question: ‘What is the significance of the letter A in The Scarlet Letter ?’" She glanced up. "You read the book, right?"

 

"Enough to pass the quiz," Uzi said with a shrug.

 

Lizzy rolled her eyes but didn’t seem too annoyed. As she started writing, Uzi hesitated. This might be my only chance to ask.

 

Clearing her throat, she leaned slightly toward Lizzy. "Hey, uh… do you know someone named V?"

 

Lizzy stopped writing mid-sentence, her pencil hovering over the paper. Then, she turned her head to look at Uzi, one perfectly shaped eyebrow raised.

 

"V?" she repeated.

 

Uzi shrugged. “Yeah…?” She sounded unsure.

 

Lizzy’s smirk returned. "Yeah, I know her. She’s one of my best friends."

 

That caught Uzi off guard. "Really?"

 

"Mhmm." Lizzy twirled her pencil between her fingers. "She’s kind of a big deal. She's on the volleyball team, super confident, kinda scary when she wants to be, but drones love her. Definitely not someone you'd forget." She finished her sentence with a soft giggle.

 

Uzi absorbed this information, nodding slowly. So, V was another popular girl. That tracked.

 

“…So what does she look like?” Uzi prodded.

 

Lizzy continued,” She has a silver bob cut- super pretty. Always wears a black headband. Wait…” Lizzy tilts her head, scrutinizing her. "Why are you asking?"

 

Uzi stiffened. "No reason. Just… wondering."

 

Lizzy’s smirk widened, like she didn’t quite believe her. "Uh-huh. Sure."

 

Uzi quickly looked back down at the worksheet. "We should probably finish this."

 

Lizzy chuckled but let it go, returning to the assignment.

 

-

 

By the time class ended, Uzi was still lost in thought. She barely remembered what they had written on the worksheet, too distracted by what she had just learned.

 

So, this “V” girl—was popular, athletic, and apparently well-liked. And now, Uzi had a general idea of what this girl might look like, thanks to Lizzy’s description.

 

She still wasn’t sure what to do with the letter. Should she try to find V and give it to her? Would that be weird? What if instead she just ignored it? Pretended she never found it in the first place? No, this V girl had a right to know. Besides, if someone else received a letter meant for Uzi, obviously she’d want to know. It wouldn’t be fair to not give it to V, just because she felt awkward.

 

Uzi sighed, adjusting her bag as she made her way to the cafeteria. She figured there was only one way to deal with this—find V at lunch. She didn’t know what she’d say yet, but at the very least, she needed to see who she was dealing with.

 

With that thought in mind, she entered the cafeteria, scanning the sea of students.

 

Time to find V.

 

Uzi wove through the crowded cafeteria, gripping the strap of her backpack tightly. The noise was overwhelming—laughter, conversation, the occasional shout from across the room. The smell of reheated cafeteria food clung to the air, mixing with the general chaos of lunchtime.

 

Her heart thumped in her chest as her eyes landed on Lizzy, sitting at one of the more exclusive lunch tables near the middle of the room. And next to her, lounging with an air of casual indifference, was a girl Uzi could only assume was V.

 

She had the confidence of someone who knew she didn’t need to try to stand out. Shiny, silver, slightly messy hair framed sharp features, and her amber eyes were half-lidded as if she were perpetually unimpressed with the world around her. She wore the school’s volleyball team jacket, lazily draped over her shoulders. Even sitting down, there was something about her that felt imposing—like she was constantly sizing up the room, deciding if anyone was worth her attention.


Yup. That’s definitely her.

 

Uzi swallowed. Okay. Just walk up and do this. Simple. No reason to be nervous.

 

Her legs didn’t seem to get the memo, though, because with every step closer, a creeping sense of anticipation crawled up her spine.

 

Finally, she reached the table. Lizzy was the first to notice her, looking up with a curious tilt of her head.

 

“Oh, hey,” Lizzy said, smiling. “Did you need something?”

 

Uzi cleared her throat, suddenly feeling very aware of the fact that she was now standing in front of V, who had slowly turned her gaze toward her. Those sharp, piercing eyes looked her up and down, unreadable.

 

“Uh… yeah.” Uzi shifted awkwardly. “I was just wondering… you’re V, right?”

 

V, who had been lazily poking at her food, sighed and leaned back in her chair, arms crossed. “Okay, you’ve got my name. Now what?” Her voice was flat, unimpressed.

 

Uzi bristled slightly at the bluntness. Geez. Okay. Not a people person. Got it.

 

“I—uh—well, I actually found something earlier, and I think it was meant for you,” she said, reaching into her pocket. “It’s this letter, and—”

 

Her fingers met empty fabric.

 

Her stomach dropped.


Wait—where is it?

 

Panic shot through her as she patted her pocket, then the other one. She knew she had put it there. She was sure of it. But now—nothing.

 

Her face paled.

 

V raised an eyebrow. “Are you gonna keep standing there, or…?”

 

Uzi forced herself to swallow down the rising panic. “I—um—I must’ve dropped it,” she admitted, internally screaming at herself.

 

Lizzy blinked. “Dropped what?”

 

“The letter,” Uzi said quickly, trying to compose herself. “It was a love letter. I found it in my locker, but it was actually meant for V.” She hesitated, glancing at her. “It was from a… secret admirer or something.”

 

Lizzy’s smile widened knowingly. “Ohhh, so that’s why you were asking about her earlier.”

 

V, on the other hand, didn’t react right away. She just stared at Uzi, then exhaled through her nose and shrugged. “Huh.”

 

That was it. No shock, no curiosity. Just… complete indifference.


Uzi frowned. “That’s it? Huh?”

 

V leaned on one arm, poking at her food again with her fork. “Yeah. Not really my problem if you lost it.”

 

Uzi blinked. “You’re not even a little curious about who wrote it?”

 

V shrugged again. “Drones like me. Not exactly shocking.”

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes. Wow. Okay. Humble, much?

 

Uzi crossed her arms. “So you really don’t care?”

 

V finally looked at her again, expression unreadable. “Do you care?”

 

Uzi opened her mouth, then closed it. Did she? It wasn’t her letter. It had nothing to do with her, really. She had just found it by accident. But for some reason, the fact that V was this uninterested made her bristle.

 

“…I mean, I just thought you should know about it,” Uzi muttered, feeling slightly defeated.

 

V hummed. “Noted.”

 

Uzi stared at her for a second longer, then sighed. “Alright. Well. That’s all I wanted to say, I guess.”

 

V gave her a lazy wave. “Cool.”

 

Lizzy smiled. “See you around, Uzi.”

 

Uzi turned and walked away, shaking her head.

 

-

 

As she weaved back through the cafeteria, Uzi let out a long sigh.

 

Okay. That was… something.

 

She hadn’t really known what to expect from V, but that wasn’t it. The total lack of reaction, the bluntness, the general couldn’t-care-less attitude. It was weird. Someone had written this whole heartfelt letter, pouring out their feelings, and V acted like it was just another Tuesday.

 

Who even likes a girl like that?

 

Not that V was terrible or anything, but she wasn’t exactly giving “romance material” vibes. She was cold, distant, and had the social grace of a brick wall.

 

Uzi shook her head. Whatever. Not my problem. I did what I could.

 

Still, she couldn’t help but wonder.

 

Who was this secret admirer? And why were they so into V, of all drones?

 

Uzi continued walking through the cafeteria, finding a seat to eat her lunch… by herself. Again. Her thoughts circled like vultures over a particularly confusing meal.

 

She didn’t get it.

 

The letter wasn’t even for her. She had just found it. It had nothing to do with her, and yet…

 

That feeling. That weird, fluttery warmth she’d felt when she first read it.

 

She hadn’t even realized how nice it was to be spoken to like that—well, almost spoken to like that. The way the words had been written, the admiration in them, the sheer sweetness of it… it was like getting a glimpse into someone’s most vulnerable feelings. And for a brief moment, as her mind wandered, she thought—

 

She shook her head violently. Nope. Stupid. Doesn’t matter.

 

But why did it bother her so much? Why did V’s total disinterest irritate her?

 

Maybe because it felt… wasted.

 

Someone had put themselves out there, had written this whole heartfelt thing, and V just shrugged it off like it was nothing. Like she had drones throwing themselves at her all the time. Like it wasn’t a big deal.

 

Uzi scowled to herself. Maybe it isn’t a big deal to her.

 

She didn’t know why that fact annoyed her so much. Maybe because, deep down, she couldn’t imagine someone ever writing something like that for her. She barely had friends, let alone admirers.

 

She sighed, forcing herself to straighten up and push those thoughts away. Who cares? Not my problem. I should just forget about it.

 

And she tried.

 

Really, she did.

 

But for the rest of the day, that strange warmth lingered at the back of her mind, like an itch she couldn’t scratch.

 

The letter. The words. The idea of someone caring about another drone that much.

 

And the fact that, even though it wasn’t for her, even though she knew she shouldn’t have felt anything—

 

For a split second, it had made her feel wanted.

 

Uzi clenched her jaw and shook her head again. Forget it. Doesn’t matter.

 

So she did what she did best.

 

She ignored it.

 

Or at least, she tried to.

Notes:

Ok first legit chapter is done!! Or like, edited and posted finally ig after it’s been rotting away in my notes app 💀

One note: I used the words “people person” at one point cuz I was describing how V isn’t one (at least in Uzi’s point of view, but she’s not wrong) because I wasn’t gonna say “drones drone.” That didn’t make sense, so just pretend it means the same thing ig. Wanted to clarify that they aren’t humans, just used that one phrase I swear 😭

Also ik this chapter is like a HUGE contrast to the prologue, but js keep in mind that the prologue becomes relevant later, but not in the way you think 🫢

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 4: Another one?!

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

By the time Uzi stepped onto the school grounds the next morning, she had completely convinced herself that she did not care about the letter.

 

It was stupid.

 

She had overthought everything.

 

She had gotten wrapped up in something that wasn’t even hers, and for what? Some dumb, cheesy love note that wasn’t even meant for her? The whole thing was ridiculous.

 

So what if V had brushed it off? So what if Uzi had felt weirdly warm when she read it? She was just being weird, that was all.

 

She was done thinking about it.

 

With that firm decision in mind, she adjusted her backpack and made her way down the hall toward her locker, weaving past other students who were still waking up for the day. The morning chatter buzzed around her, a familiar hum of half-asleep conversations and slamming lockers.

 

Everything was normal. Everything was fine.

 

Until she got to her locker.

 

She stopped in her tracks, staring.

 

There, sticking out from the edge of the metal door, was a small envelope—identical to the one from yesterday.

 

Her heart did not skip a beat. Nope. Not at all.

 

She just… wasn’t expecting it, that’s all.

 

Swallowing, she slowly reached for the envelope, peeling it out from where it was wedged. It had the same little heart sticker sealing it shut. And just as before… No name. No indication of who it was from.

 

Her fingers hesitated before she opened it, unfolding the letter inside.

 

This time, instead of a long heartfelt message, it was a poem.

 

A really corny one.

 

---

 

The moon shines bright, but not like you,

Your light is warm, your heart is true.

Though distance keeps my words at bay,

My thoughts of you don’t fade away.

 

One day, I hope you’ll finally see,

The way my heart beats endlessly.

 

Love,

Your secret admirer

 

---

 

Uzi blinked.

 

Then blinked again.

 

Then let out a short, incredulous laugh.

 

"Oh my gosh," she muttered under her breath, shaking her head.

 

It was so cheesy. So over-the-top dramatic. It was like something ripped straight out of a bad romance movie.

 

And yet…

 

Her fingers tightened around the paper slightly.

 

Despite the overwhelming corniness of it all… it was still sweet.

 

Someone had actually sat down and written this for V. They were really putting their feelings out there. Even though it wasn’t meant for her, she couldn’t help but feel… something.

 

But that brought her to the question— W hat was she supposed to do with it?

 

Her eyes flicked down the hall toward where she knew V’s locker actually was.

 

She should give it to her. It was her letter, after all.

 

But then she thought about yesterday.

 

The way V had just shrugged it off. The way she hadn’t even cared.

 

Uzi pursed her lips, conflicted.

 

It wasn’t her letter. It wasn’t her business.

 

And yet…

 

She folded the letter carefully, stuffing it into her pocket.

 

I’ll just… hang onto it for now.

 

A tiny voice in the back of her mind whispered that she knew she was being selfish, but she shoved that thought aside. It wasn’t like V even wanted the letter. If anything, she was doing the admirer a favor by keeping it out of the hands of someone who didn’t appreciate it.

 

Still, she knew she couldn’t just let this keep happening. If this mystery drone kept slipping letters into her locker, she was going to have a whole collection by the end of the month.

 

Maybe she should just… write something back?

 

Nothing dramatic. Just a quick note, something simple, like:

 

"Hey, this isn’t V’s locker. You’ve got the wrong person."

 

Then whoever was writing these would stop, and that would be the end of it.

 

Decision made, she reached for her backpack to grab a piece of paper—

 

RRRIIIINNNGGG!!

 

Her head snapped up.

 

The bell—

 

"Crap!"

 

She bolted down the hall, shoving past confused students as she sprinted to class. Her heart pounded as she skidded around the corner, nearly tripping over her own feet in the process.

 

By the time she crashed through the classroom door, all eyes were already on her.

 

Mr. Calloway sighed, rubbing his temples.

 

"Miss Doorman."

 

Uzi winced. "Yeah?"

 

"You’re late." His voice was completely monotone, as if he had already accepted that this was going to be a recurring thing.

 

"Yeah…" she panted, trying to catch her breath. "Sorry."

 

Mr. Calloway looked at her, unimpressed. Then, in the same tired, deadpan voice, he said, "Detention after school."

 

Uzi groaned. "Seriously?"

 

He gestured vaguely. "Rules are rules."

 

Slumping in defeat, she dragged herself to her seat, dropping her bag onto the floor.

 

As she flopped into her chair, she rested her forehead against her desk with a quiet groan.

 

This day was not off to a good start.

 

-

 

Uzi sat slouched in her chair, resting her chin in her hand as the teacher rambled endlessly about something she should probably be paying attention to. But her mind was elsewhere, completely tangled up in the mess of thoughts she had been trying to ignore since she found that second letter.

 

She had to put an end to this.

 

She wasn’t about to become the middleman for some lovesick mystery writer who couldn’t even figure out the right locker. It was a simple misunderstanding, and she just needed to correct it.

 

So, while everyone else was scribbling notes from the lesson, she casually tore a small piece of paper from her notebook and started writing.


"Hey, this isn’t V’s locker. You’ve got the wrong person."

 

She stared at the words for a moment, tapping her pencil against her desk.

 

That was good enough, right? Short. Direct. No extra details.

 

And yet…

 

Before she could stop herself, she pressed her pencil back to the paper and, underneath the first message, added:

 

"By the way, it’s not really worth your time to write to V. She doesn’t seem to care about these letters. They’re too nice for her, I guess."

 

The moment she lifted her pencil, she froze.

 

Then immediately scowled at herself.

 

What the hell was that?!

Why did she write that? That wasn’t her business! This whole thing wasn’t her business! What did she care if this admirer kept writing letters? It wasn’t her job to judge whether someone’s feelings were wasted or not.

 

Her fingers twitched as she glared at the words.

 

You’re so stupid, she scolded herself, flipping her pencil around and furiously erasing the last part.

 

When she finished, all that remained was the original short message.

 

She sighed, rubbing her temple.

 

What is wrong with me?

 

This whole thing had gotten under her skin in a way she couldn’t understand. Maybe she was just annoyed. Maybe it just bothered her to see someone’s feelings dismissed so easily.

 

Or maybe…

 

She shook her head. Nope. Not going there. Doesn’t matter.

 

Stuffing the note into her pocket, she let out a quiet exhale and forced herself to focus back on the lesson.

 

She just needed to leave the note on her locker and move on. Simple.

 

No more thinking about this. No more feeling weird about it.

 

She was done.

 

-

 

As soon as the bell rang, Uzi was out of her seat, making her way down the crowded hall toward her locker.

 

She wasn’t in a rush or anything. Definitely not.

 

It wasn’t like she was expecting another letter. That would be ridiculous.

 

…But still.

 

The thought did cross her mind.

 

It was just a passing curiosity, that’s all. A normal thought. Like, if there was another note, she’d just shake her head and roll her eyes, because obviously this admirer hadn’t figured it out yet.

 

But if there wasn’t one, then—well, whatever.

 

It didn’t matter.

 

She shoved her hands into her pockets, keeping her expression neutral as she weaved through the sea of students. The closer she got, the more she could feel something strange bubbling in her chest.

 

Not anticipation. Definitely not that.

 

Just… curiosity.

 

Yeah. That was it.

 

She turned the final corner, her locker coming into view.

 

Nothing was there.

 

No little envelope sticking out. No heart sticker. No letter.

 

Just an empty metal door staring back at her.

 

Uzi blinked.

 

Then, to her absolute horror, she felt a tiny, annoying pang of disappointment deep down in her gut.

 

She clenched her jaw immediately. No. Nope. We are NOT doing this.

 

Why should she care if there wasn’t another note? If anything, this was a good thing. It meant the admirer had either found the right locker or finally given up. 

 

That was what she wanted, right?

 

Swallowing the weird, unwanted feeling, she pulled out the note she had written and carefully placed it on her locker, sticking it right where the other letters had been left.

 

There. Done.

 

She took a step back, staring at the little piece of paper, letting out a breath.

 

That’s it. No more letters. No more dumb feelings. Moving on.

 

Without another thought, she turned and walked away, blending into the crowd of students heading to their next class.

 

But despite everything, that tiny feeling of disappointment lingered, stubborn and unshakable.

 

And for the life of her, she couldn’t understand why.

 

-

 

The day had dragged.

 

By the time the final bell rang, Uzi was more than ready to grab her stuff and get out of there—well, at least, she would have been if she didn’t have detention.

 

With an annoyed sigh, she made her way down the hall toward her locker, weaving through the crowd of students eager to escape for the day. As she approached, her eyes flicked to where she had left the note earlier.

 

It was gone.

 

Her fingers hovered over the locker door for a second, just taking that in.


Huh.

 

She wasn’t sure what she had expected. Maybe for it to still be there, untouched. Or crumpled up on the floor. Maybe even another letter in its place—

 

No. Nope. Not going there.

 

What mattered was that it was gone, which meant whoever had been leaving the letters had gotten the message.

 

A strange sense of relief settled in her chest.

 

Good. That’s… good. It’s over now.

 

She should’ve felt nothing about it. Maybe even satisfaction. But the fact that she had to tell herself it was a good thing made something itch in the back of her mind.

 

Whatever. Doesn’t matter.

 

She quickly shoved her books into her locker, slamming it shut. Just as she was about to leave, a new wave of irritation hit her as she remembered where she actually had to go.

 

Detention.

 

She groaned. Right.

 

As if this day hadn’t already been long enough.

 

Dragging her feet, she turned and started making her way toward the detention room, hands stuffed in her pockets, already dreading the next hour of pure boredom.

 

-

 

Uzi pushed open the door to the detention room, fully expecting to see a tired, middle-aged teacher glaring at her from behind a desk.

 

Instead, she was met with… absolutely nothing.

 

The desk at the front of the room was empty. No teacher in sight.

 

The students, however, were there. And none of them looked particularly concerned about the lack of supervision.

 

A group of kids had taken over the back of the room, chatting loudly and laughing at something on one of their phones. One guy leaned back in his chair, lazily exhaling a puff of vape smoke, completely unconcerned. The faint scent of artificial watermelon filled the air, and Uzi wrinkled her nose.

 

Nobody was even pretending to do detention things.

 

Well—almost nobody.

 

Toward the front of the room, a girl sat hunched over her desk, her arms crossed as she aggressively scribbled into a notebook. She looked mildly annoyed, as if she despised the fact that she was here but was determined to make use of her time anyway.

 

Then there was the other out-of-place kid.

 

A boy sat near the window, completely absorbed in a book, flipping the pages with practiced ease. Unlike the rest of the room, he seemed totally detached from the chaos around him, almost like he didn’t even register it.

 

Uzi stood there for a moment, taking it all in.

 

This… was not what she had expected.

 

Wasn’t there supposed to be some semblance of authority? Someone watching them? Keeping them in check?

 

Apparently not.

 

Before she could pick a seat, a paper airplane soared through the air, barely missing her head before smacking into the whiteboard at the front of the room. A few kids laughed.

 

Uzi sighed.

 

With the only real options being awkward loner girl and quiet book guy, she opted for the latter, heading toward the seat near the window.

 

It wasn’t because she cared to sit next to him or anything—she just liked the window. It made her feel less trapped.

 

She slid into the chair and dropped her bag onto the desk, letting out a quiet exhale as she leaned back.

 

At least if no one was actually enforcing detention rules, she wouldn’t have to suffer through some lecture about responsibility.

 

Uzi slumped further into her seat, staring blankly at the scratched-up surface of her desk.

 

Her options were simple:

 

A) Be productive and do schoolwork.

B) Sleep.

 

Obviously, B was the superior choice.

 

With a sigh, she folded her arms and rested her head against them, letting her eyes drift shut. Maybe if she ignored everything long enough, the hour would pass faster.

 

Unfortunately, the other kids in the room had different plans.

 

The loud chatter, obnoxious laughter, and the occasional thud of something hitting the walls made it painfully difficult to tune out. The guy in the back was still vaping, making a big show of blowing smoke rings while his friends egged him on. Someone was smacking a pen against their desk, rapid and erratic, like they were doing it just to be annoying.

 

Uzi clenched her jaw, trying to block it all out.

 

Just ignore it. Just sleep. Just—

 

A sudden crash made her eyes snap open.

 

Right next to her, a book had hit the floor with a heavy thud, followed by the sharp clatter of pens and pencils scattering in every direction.

 

She lifted her head just in time to see someone casually stepping away from the scene, not even bothering to look back.

 

“Whoops,” the guy said, his voice dripping with fake apology. He barely even paused before continuing on, laughing under his breath as he rejoined his group at the back of the room.

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed.

 

Yeah, that wasn’t an accident.

 

The boy next to her, the one who had been absorbed in his book, was now sitting tensely in his seat, his hands clenched into fists on the desk. His jaw was tight, and for a second, he just stared at the mess on the floor, like he was trying to keep himself from reacting.

 

Then, without a word, he bent down to start gathering his things, his movements stiff and a little too controlled.

 

Uzi watched him for a second, then exhaled through her nose.

 

That was rude.

 

She didn’t know this guy, didn’t even know his name, but seeing someone deliberately mess with him for no reason just annoyed her.

 

For a brief moment, she debated whether to do anything. She could just sit back and let him deal with it himself—he didn’t ask for help, after all.

 

But as she glanced at the pencils scattered across the floor, something about the situation sat wrong with her.

 

With a quiet sigh, she pushed back her chair and got up.

 

Guess I’m doing this.

Notes:

Yay new chapter

Did yall like this chapter? I can’t wait to post the next one - the story starts picking up from there

Oh yeah also just so you know, the random girl in detention I talked abt is like completely irrelevant. Js wanted to add that for detail ig.

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 5: A friend

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

As Uzi crouched down to help, the boy finally looked at her.

 

He had messy, platinum blond hair that fell slightly over his forehead, and sharp golden eyes that flickered with a strange mix of exhaustion and irritation. Even as he reached for his scattered things, his movements were stiff, tense—like he was trying not to let the whole situation get to him.

 

His expression, though? It was the part that stood out the most.

 

He looked pissed, sure, but beneath the frustration, there was something else. Something heavier.

 

Resignation.

 

Like he had already expected something like this to happen.

 

Still, when he spoke, his voice wasn’t harsh or bitter. If anything, it held the opposite—a quiet sort of appreciation. Maybe even a little sadness.

 

“…You don’t have to do that,” he said, glancing at her briefly before looking back down at the mess.

 

Uzi shrugged, grabbing a few stray pencils. “It’s no problem, really.”

 

She kept her tone casual, like this situation was just some random inconvenience and not an obvious case of someone being a complete jerk to him.

 

For a second, he hesitated, like he wasn’t sure what to say. Then he sighed, reaching for more of his things.

 

“…Thank you,” he murmured.

 

They worked in silence after that, gathering up the pens and pencils. It didn’t take long—most of them had landed in the same general area.

 

Once Uzi had picked up all the ones near her, she held them out. “Here.”

 

The boy took them, his expression softening, even if only slightly.

 

“Thanks,” he said again. “You… really didn’t have to do that. I appreciate it.”

 

She waved it off. “It’s whatever.”

 

He hesitated, then gave her a small nod before organizing the things back into his pencil case.

 

A beat passed.

 

Figuring it was as good a time as any, Uzi leaned back slightly and said, “I’m Uzi, by the way.”

 

He paused for half a second, then met her gaze.

 

“…N.”

 

That was all he gave—just his name, short and simple. But his tone didn’t come off as shy or uncomfortable. Just… careful. Like he was used to keeping people at arm’s length.

 

She studied him for a second, debating whether or not to say what was on her mind.

 

It wasn’t really her business, but…

 

Eh, screw it.

 

“…Why’d that guy do that?” she asked, nodding toward where the jerk from earlier had gone.

 

N let out a quiet breath, looking vaguely annoyed. “That group’s been messing with me for a while,” he admitted. “Not all the time, but enough to be annoying.”

 

His fingers absentmindedly adjusted the book on his desk as he continued.

 

“I think it’s because we share a class, and the teacher really likes me.” He said it plainly, like he’d already thought about it before. “They think I’m some kind of teacher’s pet or something.”

 

He frowned slightly. “Which is stupid, by the way. The teacher likes me because I’m polite. Meanwhile, they’re loud, disruptive, obnoxious—” He stopped himself, shaking his head. “I dunno. Maybe they’re just looking for an excuse to be jerks.”

 

Uzi absorbed this, her thoughts flickering between what he’d just said and what she’d already observed.

 

Figures.

 

It wasn’t exactly surprising. Some people just hated when someone else got along with authority figures, especially if they didn’t. It was an easy excuse to single someone out.

 

But even knowing that, something about it still bugged her.

 

She glanced at N again, his expression neutral but his posture still a little too tense.

 

For some reason, she felt a weird twinge of frustration on his behalf.

 

Uzi hesitated for a moment before glancing back at N, curiosity getting the better of her.

 

“So…” she started, tilting her head. “Why are you even in detention?”

 

N stiffened—just for a second. His fingers twitched slightly where they rested on his book, his posture going rigid.

 

But then, almost as quickly as the tension appeared, he forced a small, awkward smile and rubbed the back of his neck.

 

“Uh… well…” He chuckled nervously. “I was late to class. Three days in a row.”

 

Uzi raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. “That’s it?”

 

“Apparently, that’s all it takes,” he replied, letting out a small sigh before slumping slightly in his seat. “I mean, I get it—I was late. But detention seems a little extreme, don’t you think?”

 

She huffed in amusement. “Yeah, kinda.”

 

A brief silence passed before Uzi, still feeling just a little nosy, asked, “So why were you late?”

 

N blinked at her, caught off guard by the question.

 

“Oh—uh…” He shifted, looking down at his desk for a second before answering. “I was just… really busy with something before class. I don’t usually run late, and I definitely don’t plan on doing it again.” He shook his head, almost like he was scolding himself. “Three times is already way too many.”

 

Uzi noted his tone—it was firm, certain. Whatever had been keeping him busy must’ve been important to him.

 

She debated pressing further, but ultimately decided against it. They had just met, and it really wasn’t her business.

 

Instead, she shrugged. “Well, I’m here for the same reason. I was late too.”

 

N perked up slightly, looking at her with mild surprise. “Oh. Really?”

 

“Yep,” she said, resting her chin on her palm. “I just lose track of time, I guess. It’s not that abnormal for me, but I don’t get detention too often.”

 

N hummed thoughtfully. “Huh. Guess that makes you more of a repeat offender than me.”

 

Uzi smirked. “Guess so.”


For a moment, things were… oddly comfortable. They weren’t exactly friends, but this conversation felt easy, which was kind of surprising.

 

After a brief pause, Uzi figured she might as well mention something else about herself. “I’m still kinda new here, by the way.”

 

N tilted his head. “Oh? How new?”

 

“A few weeks,” she said. “I move around a lot. My dad’s job makes it hard to stay in one place.”

 

N blinked. “What does he do?”

 

“He owns a company. Builds doors all over the country.”

 

N’s brows lifted slightly, seeming impressed. “Oh, cool.”

 

Uzi scoffed lightly. “Sure, if you’re really into doors.”

 

N chuckled. “Fair point.” He then paused, his expression shifting slightly. “Still, that must be tough—moving all the time.”

 

She hesitated, then shrugged. “It’s whatever. I’m used to it.”

 

But the truth was… it did kind of suck.

 

Never really settling in, never having a place that truly felt like home—it got exhausting.

 

N didn’t push, though. He just nodded, his expression softening with something that almost looked like empathy.

 

Uzi wasn’t sure why that stood out to her.

 

But before she could think too much about it, the background noise of detention dragged her back to reality, reminding her of where she was.

 

And, more importantly, how much time they still had left to sit here.

 

Great.

 

Uzi wasn’t sure how it happened, but somehow, talking to N felt… easy.

 

Like, weirdly easy.

 

She had fully expected their conversation to fizzle out after a few minutes, but instead, it kept flowing, neither of them running out of things to say.

 

They talked about dumb school rules, the weirdest things they had seen in the hallways, and how half the vending machines never worked. N had a particular rant about how unfair it was to see his favorite snack get stuck right at the edge, just out of reach.

 

“Like, I paid for it, you know?” he huffed, arms crossed. “And the machine just decides I don’t get it?”

 

Uzi smirked. “Did you shake it?”

 

“Yes. It didn’t help.”

 

“That’s tragic.”

 

“I know.”

 

It was stupid, meaningless conversation, but… it was fun. Uzi didn’t even realize how much time had passed until—

 

“Ahem.”

 

Both she and N stiffened as a voice cut through the room.

 

Slowly, they turned to see the detention teacher—some old, balding guy who looked like he’d rather be anywhere but here—standing at his desk with an unimpressed expression.

 

“You two done?” he asked, his tone dripping with disinterest.

 

Uzi immediately felt annoyance rise in her chest, but before she could say anything, N spoke first.

 

“Sorry, sir,” he said sincerely, sitting up a little straighter.

 

Uzi bit back a groan, knowing there was no point in arguing. “Yeah. Won’t happen again.”

 

The teacher squinted at them, like he was debating whether or not to believe them.

 

“You’re lucky I don’t feel like dealing with paperwork,” he muttered. “Otherwise, I’d be giving both of you another detention.”

 

Uzi barely kept herself from rolling her eyes. Oh no, not another sentence in this lawless wasteland.

 

Still, she and N both nodded, falling silent.

 

Seemingly satisfied, the teacher let out a long sigh and sat down at his desk, immediately pulling out his phone like he had already forgotten about them.

 

The room, now under actual supervision, grew quiet.

 

There were still small sounds here and there—the soft scratching of pencils, the occasional crumpling of paper as notes were passed under desks, the faint whispers of students who were definitely not working.

 

But overall, detention had finally settled into its usual dull, suffocating boredom.

 

Uzi sighed, slumping against her desk. *Great. Back to this.*

 

Her eyelids felt heavy. She hadn’t realized how much energy talking to N had actually taken.

 

…Might as well sleep.

 

She rested her head on her folded arms, blocking out the dim lights and distant murmurs.

 

The sounds of detention slowly faded, and before she knew it, she was asleep.

 

Uzi shifted slightly in her seat, adjusting her arms to make them more comfortable as a pillow. The dull hum of the classroom filled her ears—the faint scratching of pencils, the occasional muffled cough, the quiet clicking of the detention teacher’s phone as he mindlessly scrolled.

 

Despite all of that, she felt oddly… content.

 

Not because of detention, obviously. Detention sucked. But…

 

Her conversation with N had actually been nice.

 

Like, genuinely nice.

 

It was stupid to feel happy about something as simple as talking to someone, but for once, it didn’t feel like she was forcing small talk with another random classmate she’d never see again after this school year.

 

N was different.

 

He actually listened when she spoke. He wasn’t just waiting for his turn to talk. He wasn’t fake.

 

And for the first time since transferring, Uzi felt like she might actually be making a friend.

 

Not just another casual acquaintance she occasionally talked to in class—an actual friend.

 

That thought alone made her feel warm inside, but it didn’t last long. Reality sank back in just as quickly, and the warmth was replaced with exhaustion.

 

She already hated this school.

 

Every day was the same tiring routine of dragging herself out of bed, barely making it to class on time, zoning out during lectures, and avoiding people in the hallways.

 

She was drained.

 

And the worst part? She had to do it all again tomorrow.

 

Great.

 

She exhaled, shifting her head to the side. At least detention was almost over.

 

…But maybe tomorrow wouldn’t be so bad if N was around.

 

She could ask him where he sat at lunch—maybe they could hang out? It’d be way better than eating by herself again.

 

She was about to let herself sink into sleep when a sudden thought crossed her mind—

 

Oh.

 

The letter.

 

She had been so absorbed in talking to N that she completely forgot about it.

 

That realization should’ve made her feel relieved, and in a way, it did. It was nice not to have that stupid envelope constantly floating in the back of her mind.

 

But now that she was thinking about it again… ugh.

 

Annoyed, she shifted again, feeling the crinkle of paper in her pocket—the cheesy poem, still folded neatly inside. At least she had made sure not to lose it this time.

 

She sighed through her nose.

 

Why was this still bothering her?

 

It wasn’t her letter. It had never been her letter.

 

And yet, the words had stuck with her. The way they had made her feel—warm, flustered, wanted—was stupid.

 

She shut the her current train of thought down immediately. Not worth thinking about.

 

Instead, she focused on the soft sounds of the classroom, the faint tick of the clock on the wall.

 

A few more minutes, and detention would be over.

 

She let her eyes slip shut.

 

Then—

 

A sudden poke to her arm.

 

She tensed, her eyes snapping open as she flinched away from the unexpected touch.

 

“What the—”

 

She turned to see N standing beside her desk, looking down at her with a somewhat amused expression.

 

“Sorry,” he said, not looking that sorry. “Didn’t mean to startle you.”

 

Uzi blinked groggily, rubbing her eyes before looking around.

 

The room was empty.

 

The other students were gone. Even the teacher was nowhere to be seen.

 

“How long was I out?” she muttered, sitting up.

 

“Not too long,” N shrugged. “Detention just ended, and I figured I’d wake you up before I left. Didn’t want you accidentally spending the night here.”

 

Uzi stared at him for a second, still processing.

 

He didn’t have to do that. He could’ve just left, like everyone else.

 

“…Oh.” She stretched her arms, still shaking off sleep. “Uh, thanks, I guess.”

 

“No problem,” N said, grabbing his bag and slinging it over his shoulder. “See you around, Uzi.”

 

And with that, he turned and left.

 

Uzi sat there for a moment, watching as the door swung shut behind him.

 

Then, with a sigh, she grabbed her own bag and stood up, heading for the exit.

 

Maybe tomorrow won’t be so bad after all.

 

-

 

Uzi lay flat on her back, staring at the ceiling.

 

Her room was dark, the only light coming from the dim glow of her alarm clock on the nightstand. The numbers blinked back at her—1:47 AM.

 

She was so tired. She wanted to sleep. But her brain had other plans.

 

With a frustrated sigh, she turned over, facing the other side of the room. Her eyes landed on her nightstand.

 

The note was still sitting there.

 

She scowled at it.

 

She hadn’t known where else to put it when she changed out of her school clothes earlier, so she just left it there. But now, seeing it again, it was like it was mocking her.

 

She should just throw it away.

 

But instead, she hesitated.

 

Her fingers twitched slightly before she groaned and snatched it off the nightstand, unfolding it with more force than necessary.

 

She told herself she was just making sure she hadn’t imagined how cheesy it was.

 

That was all.

 

But as she read the words again, her heart still did that stupid little flutter thing she hated.

 

It was dumb. It was corny. And yet, it was sweet.

 

Whoever wrote this really liked V.

 

And yet—

 

That warmth settled in her chest again, and suddenly, realization hit her like a train.

 

Oh.

 

Oh.

 

Her face immediately burned.

 

She felt embarrassed.

 

This wasn’t even her letter, and yet she had let herself feel something over it. She had let herself pretend, for just a second, that someone had written this for her.

 

Uzi groaned loudly, crumpling the note into a ball and chucking it across the room.

 

It hit the wall with a soft thud before rolling to a stop on the floor.

 

She exhaled sharply and flopped onto her back again, glaring up at the ceiling.

 

That was so stupid.

 

She squeezed her eyes shut, willing her brain to just shut up for once.

 

It took a while, but eventually, the exhaustion won.

 

And as her breathing evened out and her thoughts faded, Uzi finally drifted off to sleep.

Notes:

Finallyyy posted again

Mb for ghosting yall for like three days, was really busy. I’m gonna try and post a bunch of chapters today, at least 2 more after this one!!

So, N and Uzi finally have met 🫢
And the story is gonna pick up ALOT within the next few chapters

Not gonna spoil anything though 🤭

Ok that’s abt it, bye for now

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 6: Is it really you?

Notes:

Ok quick note before you read - there’s a part where Uzi’s listening to a song. If you want, I put a link to it where it talks abt it (like, when she first starts it) so you could play it, and then stop it when she stops it. I love interactive stuff like that, thought it’d be fun 🤭

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The morning air was crisp as Uzi stepped onto the bus, gnawing on a piece of toast. It was a lazy, last-minute breakfast—she hadn’t felt like making anything more complicated.

 

The bus was already half full, the chaotic energy of sleep-deprived students filling the air. Some were talking loudly, their conversations overlapping into a jumbled mess of words. Others were slouched in their seats, headphones in, staring blankly at their phones, trying to will themselves awake. A few were engaged in an intense debate about some video game near the front.

 

A couple of seats down, a guy was snoring so obnoxiously loud that Uzi wondered how no one had smacked him awake yet.

 

Typical.

 

She adjusted the strap of her bag and walked toward the back of the bus.

 

This was her spot.

 

The back window seat.

 

It was one of the only perks of being antisocial—no one ever bothered to sit next to her. Either drones assumed she didn’t want to talk, thought she was weird, or they were just too busy fighting for seats closer to their friends. Regardless, it worked in her favor.

 

She sat down, exhaling as she leaned against the window, feeling the familiar cold press against her temple. Her fingers instinctively went to her pocket, pulling out her phone and her wire headphones. She untangled them with practiced ease, popping them into her ears.

 

She tapped the screen a few times, then hit shuffle on her playlist.

 

“Is It Really You?” by Loathe started playing.

 

A small smile tugged at the corner of her lips.

 

Good song.

 

The bus lurched forward, and she turned her gaze to the window, watching as the streets blurred past. Houses, trees, the occasional car—everything melted into a steady, moving landscape.

 

This was the only part of the morning she actually enjoyed.

 

There was something about watching the world go by, feeling the gentle vibrations of the bus beneath her, the cool glass against her skin, and the music drowning out the noise of everything else—it was relaxing.

 

She let herself get lost in it, her eyes half-lidded, fingers lightly tapping against her knee to the beat of the song.


For a brief moment, everything was quiet in her head.

 

Then, the bus slowed.

 

She barely registered it at first, only noticing when the motion came to a halt.

 

Another stop. Another set of students climbing aboard.

 

Uzi sighed, shifting slightly but keeping her eyes closed, hoping whoever got on would just find their seat and leave her alone.

 

The bus doors hissed shut, and the ride continued.

 

She let herself drift again.

 

But, Uzi’s half-drowsy reverie was abruptly interrupted by a gentle tap on her shoulder. Startled, she jerked her head slightly and glanced toward the aisle, irritation flickering across her face. For a split second, she braced herself against another interruption in her quiet morning ritual. But as her eyes adjusted, she recognized that familiar face—N.

 

Her annoyance melted away, replaced by a reluctant smile as memories of their previous conversation resurfaced. Still, the loud music pumping through her headphones made it hard to catch what he was saying. Uzi frowned and pulled out one earbud.

 

“What?” she called softly, a trace of exasperation in her tone as she tried to make out his words over the blaring music.

 

N repeated his words, this time a little louder, his voice carrying an easy, tentative quality. “Hey, can I sit here?” he asked, nodding toward the seat next to her.

 

Uzi considered the question for a heartbeat. The window seat was her sanctuary—a bubble of calm amid the bus’s chaos—but the idea of sharing it with someone she’d only just begun to know didn’t seem too bad. “Sure,” she replied casually, her tone light as she offered a small, welcoming smile.

 

N’s eyes brightened at her acceptance. Settling into the seat beside her, he gave her a shy nod.

 

As the bus lurched forward and rolled onto the road, N shifted slightly in his seat before turning to Uzi. His expression was friendly, if a little hesitant, as if testing the waters before diving into conversation.

 

“So,” he started, voice light, “how’s your morning been so far?”

 

Uzi, who had already begun retreating into her usual morning solitude, blinked at him. She wasn’t a morning person—at all. Small talk before noon was practically a foreign language to her. Still, she didn’t want to be rude.

 

“…Fine,” she answered, her voice flat but not unfriendly.

 

N nodded, seemingly unbothered. “That’s good! Uh, did you finish the reading for English? You were telling me yesterday about how you’ve been procrastinating a little…-“ he grinned softly as he finished his sentence.

 

Uzi squinted at him slightly, half-processing his words. “Yeah.”

 

There was a small pause. N, still determined, tried again. “Cool, cool. I thought the ending of that last chapter was kinda crazy, didn’t expect—”

 

Uzi let out a quiet sigh through her nose, shifting her gaze back out the window. “Mhm.”

 

N trailed off, finally picking up on the fact that Uzi wasn’t much for conversation right now. His smile faltered just a little, and he looked down at his hands, rubbing his thumb along the strap of his backpack. “Uh—right, I’ll shut up now,” he said with a quiet chuckle, more to himself than to her.

 

Uzi barely registered his shift in demeanor, already halfway to putting her earbud back in when something clicked in her mind— oh, right. Lunch.

 

She hesitated for a split second before turning to him again. “Hey, where do you usually sit for lunch?”

 

At this, N visibly perked up. His eyes brightened, and he straightened in his seat, as if he hadn’t expected her to ask anything.

 

“Oh! Uh—” he began, but the bus hit a bump, making them both jolt slightly.

 

The moment lingered, anticipation hanging in the air as Uzi waited for his answer.

 

N continued, “Oh, I usually sit at the table near the vending machines. You know, the one kinda in the back but not all the way in the corner?” He glanced at her to see if she was following.

 

Uzi nodded slightly, taking mental notes.

 

“I sit with Thad, Rebecca, Darren, and Emily. Do you know any of them?”

 

At the mention of Thad, something in Uzi’s brain clicked. Thad? She knew that name. Her thoughts flickered back to middle school, to a boy she used to know—someone she had actually been close with. He was goofy, always cracking jokes, and had a habit of rambling about random things. Could it be the same guy?

 

“I think I might know Thad,” Uzi said, furrowing her brows slightly. “I used to know a guy with that name back in middle school. We were kinda close, but I moved before the year ended.”

 

N tilted his head slightly, intrigued. “Really?“

 

Uzi hummed in agreement, but as her mind lingered on that memory, a heavier thought settled in. The reason I moved.

 

Her chest tightened slightly. It wasn’t just because of her dad’s job. It was because of Mom.

 

Her dad couldn’t bear to live in the house where her mother once existed, where memories of her still lingered in every room, in every small detail of their daily lives. Moving wasn’t just about work—it was about escaping the pain. And for Uzi, it had been a dark time. She had fallen into a deep depression back then, mourning the loss while adjusting to a new place where no one knew her, where she felt completely alone.

 

She was better now. She had moved on, at least mostly. But thinking about it still made her feel… hollow.

 

She kept her expression neutral, not letting any of those emotions show. No way I’m dumping that on him. I literally just met the guy.

 

Instead, she simply nodded to herself, brushing off the ache in her chest. If it’s the same Thad, that’d be kinda nice.

 

N’s eyebrows furrowed slightly as he watched Uzi’s expression shift. She had gone quiet, her gaze distant. It was subtle, but he noticed.

 

“Hey,” he said, tilting his head slightly. “Did something happen?”

 

Uzi blinked, startled. She turned to him with a look of confusion. “What do you mean?”

 

N paused, studying her for a moment more before clarifying. “I mean… between you and Thad. You got kinda quiet when you mentioned him.”

 

Crap. Uzi hadn’t expected him to pick up on that. She quickly shook her head. “No, nothing happened,” she said, forcing her voice to stay steady. “I was just… sad that I had to move. That’s all.”

 

It wasn’t technically a lie—just a withholding of the full truth. But it still made Uzi feel a bit uneasy as she spoke.

 

N nodded slowly, accepting her answer. “Yeah, that makes sense. Moving sucks. I hope it’s the same Thad so you guys can catch up.” His voice was sincere, kind.

 

Uzi glanced at him, feeling something strange stir in her chest. Why is he so nice? She wasn’t used to this— it made her feel weird, uncomfortable even. Not a bad weird, though. Just… weird.

 

She pushed the thought aside and forced a small smile. “Yeah. I hope so too.”

 

Without another word, she put her earbud back in and turned to stare out the window again, letting the music drown out the noise of the bus.

 

In the reflection of the glass, she caught a glimpse of N. He was still looking at her, his expression unreadable, before he finally pulled out his phone and looked down at the screen.

 

She wasn’t sure why, but that made her feel even weirder.

 

Before she could dwell on it, the bus slowed to a stop. The hum of voices around her grew louder as students stood up, shuffling toward the front. They had arrived at school.

 

Uzi sighed, slinging her bag over her shoulder and standing up, preparing for yet another long day.

 

Notes:

See, I told you I’d post another chapter today 😩

I feel like Uzi def listens to like alternative kinda music, like not anything specific js generally music under the alternative umbrella. (Also nightcore obvi -)

I thought that song would fit for this part. She def listens to loathe, it js makes sense. Ik that’s like they’re most popular song but I js thought it fit. Also like I don’t think even something like “A sad cartoon” or “two-way mirror” fit this part. Yeah anyways I js hope you liked that whole interactive bit 😭🤚

Another thing is ik obvi drones didn’t make any of the music, and this universe isn’t js replacing real life with drones or wtv. I’m assuming, in this AU at least (it makes sense for cannon too) that since they have phones, they have access to everything that was on the internet before humans basically extinct-ed (is that a word? Idgaf now it is) themselves. And like that includes music too. That’s valid, right? I hope that makes sense, lol

And like this whole AU is basically js if copper-9 became a fully functional society instead of being post-apocalyptic. So that’s another thing

Ok that’s all I have to say

Can’t wait to post the next chapter, the story is starting to get good!!

Also is the lore lore-ing or not?? I love this AU sm and there’s gonna be so much more lore to it, so excited!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 7: A familiar face

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The day dragged on endlessly, each class stretching into what felt like an eternity. Uzi found herself growing increasingly irritated, tapping her fingers impatiently on her desk as she watched the clock tick by at an agonizing pace. It wasn’t like she even cared about school, but today felt especially unbearable. Maybe it was because, for once, she actually had something to look forward to—lunch.

 

It was a strange feeling, almost unfamiliar. The thought of sitting with someone instead of eating alone in the corner for the first time in weeks made her feel something that she wasn’t quite used to—anticipation. And underneath that, a quiet, creeping nervousness.   

 

Thad.

 

N had said he sat with him. Could it really be the same Thad she used to know? It had been what, five? Six years? She had lost count.

 

She thought back to middle school, to the memories that had long since faded to the back of her mind. Thad had been one of the only people she genuinely got along with back then. They weren’t inseparable or anything, but she remembered laughing with him in class, sharing dumb inside jokes, and just… existing together without it feeling forced. He had been a good friend.

 

And then she moved.

 

Everything had happened so fast. Her mom died. Her dad uprooted their entire life overnight, and before she even had time to process it all, she was gone. At first, she told herself she’d stay in touch. Maybe call him, maybe text.

 

She wanted to reach out. She really did. But her mental state back then had been… bad. She convinced herself he probably forgot about her, or worse, that he didn’t care. That trying would be pointless. And the longer she waited, the more awkward it felt, until eventually, she just let it go.

 

But now? Now she wasn’t so sure.

 

What if he does hate me? The thought crept in before she could stop it. What if he thinks I abandoned him?

 

She tried to shake it off. Nothing even happened between us. I just moved away. That’s it.

 

Still, the worry lingered.   

 

Taking a deep breath, she started making her way to the cafeteria, her heartbeat just a little too fast.

 

As she approached the spot N had told her about, her stomach twisted into an uneasy knot. She wasn’t just nervous—it was more than that. It was an odd, jittery sensation clawing at her chest, making her feel restless and on edge.

 

She swallowed hard, forcing herself to keep walking. Well, here goes nothing.

 

N was sitting on the floor, cross-legged, his back resting against the wall. Three other drones were sitting with him in a loose circle, chatting casually as they ate. When he spotted Uzi, his face lit up, and he quickly waved her over, grinning. His enthusiasm caught her off guard for a second, but she shook it off and made her way toward them.

 

“Hey! You actually came,” N greeted as she approached, sounding genuinely happy about it.

 

“Yeah, well, figured I’d mix up the whole ‘brooding in the corner alone’ thing,” Uzi replied dryly, shoving her hands into her hoodie pocket.

 

N chuckled before gesturing toward the others. “These are my friends. Maybe you’ll kinda know who they are already, since you’ve been here for a bit, but just in case—” He pointed first to a girl with short, blue hair that had a pink streak, neon cyan eyes, and a confident smirk plastered on her face. “This is Rebecca.”

 

Rebecca gave Uzi a once-over before nodding. “Hey. You’re the new girl, right?”

 

“Uh, yeah. Been here a few weeks,” Uzi replied.

 

Rebecca hummed, taking a bite of her sandwich. “Cool.”

 

N moved on, pointing to a guy with dark grey and green beanie and vibrant green eyes. He had a laid-back posture, and was currently eating what looked like the saddest school lunch pizza Uzi had ever seen. “That’s Darren.”

 

Darren gave a lazy wave. “Sup.”

 

“Sup,” Uzi echoed.

 

“And this,” N gestured to the last person, a girl with black hair tied up into two pigtails, bright blue eyes, and half-oval shaped glasses. Her expression was friendly, if not welcoming,“is Emily.”

 

Emily smiled warmly. “Nice to meet you, Uzi.”

 

“…Yeah, you too,” Uzi said, feeling a little awkward with all the sudden attention.

 

As she took a moment to glance at the group, her mind drifted for a second. Thad isn’t here. She didn’t even know why she was expecting him to be, but after what N said earlier, she had thought—hoped?—he would be.   

 

She considered asking about it, just to confirm if he was the same Thad she used to know, but immediately decided against it. That would be weird, right? Asking about someone she wasn’t even sure was the same person? Besides, for all she knew, he just wasn’t here today. No point overthinking it.

 

“So,” N’s playful voice pulled her out of her thoughts. “Are you gonna sit, or are you just gonna stand there looking all broody?”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes. “Yeah, yeah, I’m sitting.” She moved to lower herself to the floor—

 

But then—

 

“Uzi…?”

 

A voice from behind her.

 

Unfamiliar.

 

But somehow, not.

 

She froze.

 

Uzi turned around, her heartbeat stuttering for just a second as she took in the person standing behind her.

 

A boy, a little taller than her, with shaggy, dirty blonde hair and familiar green eyes that widened the moment they met hers. He was wearing a backwards baseball cap—just like how she remembered—and in his hands was a lunch tray that tilted precariously in his shock.

 

For a split second, it looked like he was about to drop it, his fingers slipping against the plastic, but at the last second, he caught his balance and tightened his grip. His mouth opened slightly, as if trying to process what he was seeing, before he finally managed to speak.

 

“Uzi?” He repeated.

 

Uzi felt like she had just been smacked with a wave of nostalgia so strong it nearly knocked the breath out of her. She tried—really tried—to keep her cool, but her voice betrayed her as she said, “Thad?”

 

A moment of silence stretched between them.

 

Then, suddenly, his entire expression burst into sheer excitement, his face lighting up as if he couldn’t believe his eyes. “No way—NO WAY! It’s actually you! Holy crap!”

 

Uzi felt her nervous energy dissolve, replaced by an overwhelming sense of joy. A grin spread across her face, unable to be contained. “Dude, what the hell?! It’s been years!

 

Thad was practically bouncing on his feet, his hands still gripping his tray for dear life. “I know! I—what—how—when did you—?! What are you doing here?!

 

Uzi let out a breathless laugh, running a hand through her hair as if that would help her process this. “It’s a long story! I just—oh my god, I’m sorry! I never reached out, I swear it wasn’t personal, I just—”

 

Thad immediately shook his head, cutting her off, his voice full of reassurance. “No, no, don’t even worry about it! Seriously! I—man, I thought I was never gonna see you again! This is insane!”

 

They both started talking over each other, excitement spilling out too fast to keep up with. Words rushed between them—Uzi apologizing furiously, Thad asking rapid-fire questions, neither of them pausing to take a breath.

 

Then, almost at the exact same time, they both blurted out:

 

“I’m just glad you’re okay.”

 

A beat of silence. They both stared at each other for a moment before bursting into laughter, the overwhelming emotions simmering into something warm and familiar.

 

N, who had been sitting quietly, watching the interaction with an amused but patient expression, finally cleared his throat and spoke up. “Uh, hey, so—maybe we should all sit down?” He gestured to Thad’s tray. “Y’know, before someone drops their lunch?”

 

Thad blinked, looking down as if just now remembering he was holding food. “Oh—oh! Yeah, uh, good idea.”

 

Uzi nodded quickly. “Yeah, we’re gonna be talking forever if we just stand here.”

 

With that, the two of them finally sat down, the weight of the moment still buzzing between them.

 

Before Uzi or Thad could speak again, Darren suddenly cut in, raising an eyebrow as he looked between them. “Wait—you two know each other?”

 

Thad turned to him so quickly he nearly knocked his tray over. “Dude. You don’t know Uzi Doorman?” he said, as if it was absurd that someone could not know her.

 

Darren gave him a flat look. “Clearly not, since I just asked.”

 

Rebecca snorted at that, while Emily simply looked between them, mildly intrigued.

 

Darren gestured vaguely. “Okay, hold on, take a step back and explain. How do you two know each other?”

 

Thad leaned back against the wall, grinning. “We were in sixth grade together. We used to hang out all the time—like, all the time. She was, like, my best friend back then.”

 

Darren nodded slowly, as if piecing together some kind of mystery. “Huh. Okay, that makes more sense now.”

 

Uzi, watching all of this, couldn’t help but smirk. “Was I really that popular in sixth grade, or are you just hyping me up?”

 

Thad scoffed, waving a hand. “Nah, you were legendary.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes with a small laugh before Thad turned his full attention back to her, eyes bright with excitement.

 

“Okay, but seriously, what the hell have you been up to? Where’d you even move?”

 

The two of them started catching up, the conversation flowing easily as they reminisced on the past. They recalled stupid inside jokes, old teachers they both hated, and random moments from sixth grade that still stuck with them.

 

But then, as Thad was laughing about something, he suddenly added, “Oh! And then there was that one field trip where we all got caught sneaking snacks on the bus—

 

Uzi blinked. “What?” She sounded confused, like she had no idea what he was talking about.

 

His grin faltered.

 

Oh wait.”

 

Thad’s excitement dimmed just a little, and he rubbed the back of his neck. “That must’ve happened after you left.”

 

The air shifted, the joy of nostalgia cooling into something quieter.

 

Uzi’s smile faded slightly, her shoulders unconsciously tensing. She hadn’t even considered that—that while she was gone, life kept going without her. There were parts of Thad’s life, parts of this school, that she had missed completely.

 

For a moment, neither of them said anything.

 

The brief silence was just barely bordering on awkward when N suddenly spoke up, his voice cutting through with a gentle, almost optimistic tone. “Well… at least you guys are back together now, right?”

 

Thad looked at him, then at Uzi. Slowly, a softer smile formed on his face. “Yeah. That’s what matters.”

 

Uzi nodded, feeling the weight in her chest ease a little. “I missed you,” she admitted, avoiding eye contact. Her voice was quieter now.

 

Thad’s smile turned a little more serious, a little more genuine. “I missed you too.”

 

“I really am sorry, by the way. For never reaching out.”

 

Thad shook his head. “It’s okay. You’re here now.”

 

There was another pause, but this time, it wasn’t heavy. It was understanding.

 

Then Emily, who had been sitting there watching this entire exchange, suddenly clapped her hands lightly. “Sooo.” She dragged out the word just a bit, not in an impatient way, but in a clear attempt to shift the mood. “Uzi, how are you liking the school so far?”

 

The change of topic was subtle, but effective.

 

Uzi let out a small breath and shrugged. “Eh, it’s a school. Not the worst one I’ve been to.”

 

Not exactly a glowing review,” Darren muttered.

 

Uzi smirked. “Didn’t say it was.”

 

Rebecca chuckled. “You’ll fit right in.”

 

The previous sadness faded as the conversation shifted, everyone falling into easy chatter. It was… nice. Even if Uzi wasn’t completely sure how she felt about being back in Thad’s life just yet, one thing was certain.

 

Lunch felt a lot less lonely today.

Notes:

Whoa look at that reunion, that was great wasn’t it?

LOL ok anyways

Ik this might seem OOC for Thad ig, but like imagine it if him and Uzi were like, best friends, but a while ago, lost contact, then met again (which is what literally happened -)

This is how I would imagine that kind of interaction. Ik Thad wasn’t that important of a character in the actual show, he was js kinda there and Uzi had a crush on him in like the first episode. That was abt it

I can promise that Uzi doesn’t have a crush on him here though 😭🤚

I really like the way I characterized him in this, he’s like a comedic relief, but can be serious when he needs to… kind of. You’ll understand more later ig (foreshadowing?🤔)

So excited for yall to see how this story goes, and all the character development everyone is gonna have *insert maniacal laughter here*

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 8: Facetime Conversations

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

After school, Uzi found herself lying on her bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking back on the day. It was weird—good weird, but still weird. She hadn’t expected to reconnect with someone from her past, let alone Thad. And now? Now, they actually had each other’s numbers. This time, she wasn’t going to let them lose touch.

 

Throughout the day, she had made an effort to talk to him whenever she could between classes. It was easy—like no time had passed at all. But it was also strange how she had never even noticed him before. Then again, why would she have? It wasn’t like she had been actively thinking about him all these years. He had just been one of those people she used to know, someone who had been important then.

 

And now… he was back.

 

She grabbed her phone and checked the time. 9:15 PM.

 

Not too late, but not exactly early either. She debated for a second, but Thad never struck her as the type to go to bed early. He was probably up doing something stupid like watching conspiracy theory videos or playing some game until his eyes burned.

 

Screw it.

 

She tapped his contact and hit FaceTime. The ringing felt like it went on forever, but just as she started to think he wouldn’t pick up, the screen shifted—and there he was.

 

Yo.” His face filled the screen, his backwards cap still on. “Wasn’t expecting a call, but hey.”

 

Hope I didn’t interrupt anything important,” Uzi said, smirking slightly.

 

Nah, just debating whether birds are government spies.

 

Uzi snorted. “That’s what you were doing?

 

Listen, there’s proof, okay?

 

And just like that, they started talking.

 

The conversation flowed naturally. They talked about anything and everything—old memories, random things about their lives, stupid inside jokes from middle school that somehow still made them laugh. There was so much to catch up on, so much time to fill in. And for once, Uzi wasn’t overthinking it. She was just talking.

 

But then, in the middle of the conversation, her eyes flicked to something on the floor.

 

That stupid crumpled-up note.

 

She had completely forgotten about it since last night.

 

Without really thinking, she sighed and leaned over to pick it up. “Oh, right. I kinda wanted to talk to you about something.

 

Thad tilted his head. “Yeah?

 

Uzi hesitated for a second, then exhaled. “Okay, so. This weird thing happened two days ago. Someone left a love letter on my locker.

 

Thad immediately made a dramatic face, his mouth forming an exaggerated O. “Oooh. Secret admirer?

 

She groaned. “That’s what I thought, but it’s just so corny, man. Like, I don’t even know who left it- It was a really cheesy confession. And then yesterday, I found another one.

 

Thad leaned in, looking genuinely intrigued. “Wait, another? What’d it say?”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes. “Same kinda thing. This time it was a dumb poem.

 

Thad hummed, then smirked. “Okay, but what if this is, like, some big romantic mystery?

 

I really don’t care enough to find out.

 

He snorted. “Fair. Did you tell anyone about it?

 

Well, the thing is, it wasn’t even for me. It was for some girl named V. I was gonna tell her, and I did. Or at least i tried…” Uzi groaned, flopping back on her bed.

 

And so the mystery unravels…” Thad stated ominously,

 

She was standing right there—but she just didn’t care. Like, she full-on ignored me.

 

Thad laughed. “Yeah, that sounds like her.

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes at the screen. “Wait—you know her?

 

Kinda.” Thad shrugged. “Rebecca and N are friends with her.

 

That made Uzi pause. She frowned slightly, considering this. “N? Friends with V?”

 

Yeah.”

 

“…How?

 

Thad chuckled. “Right? That dude’s, like, the definition of nice.

 

Exactly! He’s too polite and, like… caring to be hanging around someone like her.

 

Thad laughed. “You’re not wrong.

 

Uzi shook her head, still trying to wrap her head around it. The idea of N willingly being friends with V was just bizarre. She knew, obviously, drones could have different kinds of friends, but that? That was a weird mix.

 

And now, she kinda wanted to know more about it.

 

Thad leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms. “Yeah, so, N and V? They’re actually childhood best friends.

 

Uzi blinked. “No way.”

 

Way.”

 

That doesn’t make sense.

 

Thad chuckled. “I know, right? But apparently, they’ve been close since they were kids. And like, yeah, V’s a jerk most of the time, but I think she does actually care about him.”

 

Uzi scoffed. “Doubt it.

 

Thad shrugged. “I get why you’d think that, but—okay, so there’s also this girl, J.

 

Uzi tilted her head. “J?”

 

Yeah, she’s… uh, kind of the worst.” Thad scratched the back of his neck. “She’s a huge influence on V. Like, whenever they’re together, J just eggs her on and basically encourages her to mess with N. And she does.

 

Uzi frowned. “What do you mean ‘mess with’?”

 

Like, making fun of him, teasing him, basically treating him like a joke.” Thad sighed. “And the crazy part? N just kinda takes it. He never gets mad, never tells them to stop. It’s like he just cares about V too much to be upset by it.

 

Uzi was silent for a moment, processing this. The more she thought about it, the more it made sense. N seemed like the type to be way too forgiving. She had already noticed how naturally kind he was—almost too kind.

 

But the fact that he let himself be treated like that? Just because he cared about V?

 

That pissed her off.

 

That’s not fair,” she muttered.

 

Thad hummed. “Yeah.”

 

He just lets them walk all over him?

 

Pretty much.”

 

Uzi clenched her jaw. That was stupid. N deserved better than that. She wasn’t exactly an expert on friendship, but even she knew that wasn’t what friends were supposed to do.

 

She shook her head. “That’s messed up.”

 

Thad sighed. “Yeah, well, it’s been like that for a while.

 

Uzi made a mental note to keep an eye on this whole situation. N might not care about how he was treated, but she did.

 

They talked for a little while longer, but when Uzi checked the time, she realized it was getting late. Too late.

 

Crap,” she muttered, sitting up. “We should probably go to bed. School’s tomorrow.

 

Thad groaned dramatically. “Ugh, don’t remind me.

 

Trust me, I don’t want to.

 

He chuckled but didn’t argue. “Alright, fine. Guess I should at least try to be a functional drone tomorrow.

 

Good luck with that.”

 

Gee, thanks.”

 

They both laughed before settling into a comfortable silence.

 

Then, right as Uzi was about to hang up, Thad spoke again—his voice quieter this time. “Hey, uh… I just wanna say I’m really glad we’re talking again.”

 

Uzi paused, caught off guard by the sincerity in his voice. She felt a small smile tug at her lips.

 

Yeah,” she said, just as sincerely. “Me too.”

 

There was a brief silence, not awkward but… something.

 

Then, almost at the same time, they both said, “Alright. Bye.”

 

Uzi hung up, staring at her screen for a second before setting her phone down and exhaling.

 

Today had been weird. But for once, good weird.

Notes:

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 9: An Invitation

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi lay sprawled out on her bed, phone held above her face as she lazily scrolled through social media. The sound of a cat meowing played from her screen, followed by a quiet chuckle from her. Cat videos never got old. She was just about to scroll to the next one when her phone vibrated in her hand, a notification popping up at the top of her screen. A text message.

 

From N.

 

She blinked, momentarily surprised. N had never texted her before—granted, they’d only exchanged numbers a few days ago. Amused, she swiped up on the notification to open the message.

 

N: [1:33 PM] Hey, Uzi. A few of us are going to the bowling alley and arcade later. I wanted to see if you’d like to come along. I don’t want to leave you out.

 

She raised an eyebrow, rereading the message. Something about N’s way of texting made her smile. Full sentences, proper grammar, not a single abbreviation or unnecessary emoji in sight. It was so… him. Polite, considerate, and just a little awkward. She found it funny but in a way that made her feel oddly fond of him.

 

Her eyes briefly flickered to the unfinished homework sitting on her desk. She *could* use this weekend to catch up and be productive… or she could ignore her responsibilities and go have fun instead. It wasn’t a difficult decision.

 

She smirked slightly and typed a response.

 

Uzi: [4:34 PM] sure

 

A second later, she sent another message.

 

Uzi: [4:34 PM] what time

 

The reply came almost instantly.

 

N: [4:34 PM] We’re meeting at 6.

 

Uzi: [4:35 PM] sounds good

 

Satisfied, she put her phone down on her nightstand and exhaled, staring at the ceiling.

 

This felt… nice. Being included. She wasn’t used to drones reaching out to her like this, inviting her to things without her having to awkwardly hover and hope for an invitation. It made her feel warm inside—something she wasn’t used to feeling, but she wasn’t complaining.

 

She pushed herself off her bed, stretching. If she was going to be out later, she might as well start getting ready now. Maybe pick out something decent to wear, something comfortable for bowling.

 

With that thought in mind, she headed toward her closet.

 

-

 

Uzi sat slouched in her seat near the back of the public bus, headphones in, the low hum of the vehicle mixing with the distant chatter of other passengers. The city lights blurred past the window beside her, and she absentmindedly traced patterns on the fogged-up glass with her fingertip.

 

She was used to taking the bus everywhere. Not having a car wasn’t exactly fun, and her dad—well, he was always too busy with work to drive her around. Not that she blamed him entirely, but it did get annoying. At least tonight, she had somewhere to go.

 

As the bus slowed to a stop, she pulled her earphones out and shoved her phone into her pocket, standing up just as the doors hissed open. She stepped off and onto the sidewalk, the cool evening air brushing against her face. Looking ahead, she spotted the bowling alley in the distance—its giant neon sign glowing obnoxiously against the night sky. The name of the place was plastered across the front in bold, colorful letters, and next to it, comically oversized bowling pins stood tall, as if demanding attention from everyone passing by.

 

Uzi let out a small breath, shifting her hands into her hoodie pocket as she started walking toward the entrance.

 

She wasn’t used to this. Being excited to hang out with people. It had been so long since she’d had an actual group to be part of. The constant moving had made it difficult to keep any lasting friendships, and eventually, she just stopped trying. It was easier that way—no disappointments, no forced goodbyes.

 

But now… she was trying again.

 

And, so far, it didn’t seem like a mistake.

 

She thought about how her last “friend group” had always conveniently forgotten to invite her places. They’d make inside jokes without her, have conversations that made it obvious she wasn’t really part of them. It had sucked. Made her feel like there was something wrong with her.

 

But these people? N, Thad, Rebecca, Darren, Emily? They weren’t like that. At least, not yet. And Uzi really hoped it stayed that way.

 

She reached the entrance, and the automatic doors slid open with a quiet whoosh.

 

Stepping inside, the first thing that hit her was the noise.

 

Laughter, conversation, the thunk of bowling balls hitting pins, the electronic beeps and jingles from arcade machines. The air smelled like artificial butter and fried food, mixing with the faint scent of disinfectant. To her left, the main bowling lanes stretched out, each one glowing under dim neon lights. Groups of drones were gathered around tables, some waiting their turn, others too busy eating to care about the game. To her right, the arcade was packed with people—kids and teenagers hunched over machines, aggressively pressing buttons in hopes of winning tickets.

 

The place was alive.

 

Uzi took it all in for a moment before heading toward the front desk. She stepped up, paid for her rental shoes, and accepted the pair the bored-looking employee handed her.

 

Now, all she had to do was find the others.

 

Uzi weaved her way through the crowded bowling alley, holding her rental shoes against her side as she scanned the area. The ambient hum of conversation mixed with the steady crashes of bowling balls striking pins. The neon glow of the place bathed everything in electric hues of pink, blue, and green, all amplified under the ever-present black light. The whole scene had an undeniable 80s aesthetic—bold geometric patterns on the floor, arcade machines with pixelated graphics flashing in the distance, and retro music humming softly from overhead speakers. It was a little overwhelming but in a way that made Uzi actually like it. It felt fun, energetic—like the kind of place where you wanted to hang out.   

 

Finally, she spotted them.

 

Thad was the first to notice her, immediately waving her over. Uzi grinned and waved back, picking up her pace as she approached. The group was gathered around a round booth, the kind that curved in a semi-circle with a round table in the middle. A small gap in the seating led out to the bowling lanes, where Emily had just finished her turn.

 

Uzi watched as Emily turned around after knocking down the last few pins, clapping her hands together in victory. She spun on her heel and held up a hand, which Rebecca smacked in an enthusiastic high five. The scoreboard above flickered, updating the scores. Uzi glanced up at it, briefly scanning the names, though she didn’t focus on them too much.

 

When she finally reached the group, she was met with a chorus of greetings.

 

“Uzi!” N’s voice was bright and cheerful, his usual enthusiasm shining through. “I’m so glad you made it!”

 

Uzi felt a peculiar, warm flicker in her chest at that. It was… nice, knowing he actually *cared* whether she showed up or not. But she didn’t want to seem too pleased, so she shrugged, trying to play it cool. “Yeah, well, figured I’d give you guys the honor of my presence,” she joked, though the small smile that briefly flickered across her face gave away her actual emotions.

 

Before N could respond, Thad grinned. “Dude, same! Was kinda worried you wouldn’t show.”

 

Uzi huffed out a quiet laugh. “What, and miss watching you all embarrass yourselves? No way.”

 

Thad laughed defiantly,”Oh, don’t worry, you get to embarrass yourself too.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes but smirked. “Bite me.

 

She set her shoes down by the booth, her gaze briefly flicking back to the scene around her. The neon glow, the energetic atmosphere, the sound of drones having fun—it had been a while since she’d been somewhere like this with friends. And though she wouldn’t admit it out loud, she was actually pretty glad she came.

 

Uzi crossed her arms and leaned slightly against the booth, glancing up at the scoreboard. “So, how many rounds have you guys played without me?” she asked.

 

“Only two,” N responded easily.

 

Her eyes flicked over the screen, scanning the names and scores. When she found her own, she did a slight double take—there was already a score under her name. A spare and then a four. She raised an eyebrow. “Wait, who the hell bowled for me?”

 

Thad smirked, lifting a hand as if to take credit for a great achievement. “That’d be me. My turn’s right before yours, so I figured I’d just do it for you so you wouldn’t be behind.”

 

Uzi turned to him, deadpan. “And four was the best you could do?”

 

Thad scoffed. “Hey, at least I got you a spare first! You’re welcome, by the way.”

 

She let out a quiet laugh before her gaze drifted back to the scoreboard. As she looked at the others’ scores, she took note of something. Her brow furrowed slightly in thought. “Huh… N, you have a strike and a spare?”

 

N rubbed the back of his head with an awkward chuckle. “Uh, yeah.”

 

“That’s actually kind of impressive,” Uzi admitted, crossing her arms again. “Didn’t take you as the secretly-skilled-at-bowling type.”

 

N grinned. “I don’t know if I’d say skilled, but I guess I’m decent at it?” He shrugged.

 

Thad scoffed. “He’s totally being modest. He’s, like, way too good at this for some reason.”

 

Before Uzi could respond, Thad glanced up at the screen and made a face. “Oh, it’s my turn.” He stood up and stretched dramatically, rolling his shoulders as he walked toward the lane.

 

Uzi smirked. “I’m praying on your downfall.”

 

Thad shot her a glare over his shoulder. “Wow, thanks for the support.”

 

She shrugged. “Anytime.”

 

Thad picked up his ball, giving it a little test swing before stepping up to the lane. He took a breath, focused, and—

 

The ball rolled directly into the gutter.

 

Thad froze, standing there for a second as if he couldn’t believe what just happened.

 

Uzi grinned. “Nice one.”

 

Scowling, Thad grabbed another ball and threw it again. This time, he managed to knock down a single pin before the ball veered off into the gutter again.

 

He groaned in frustration, face palming before stomping back toward the booth. “Okay, no, that was your fault,” he said, pointing an accusatory finger at Uzi. “You jinxed me.”

 

Uzi smirked. “Or maybe you just suck.”

 

Thad gasped dramatically. “The betrayal!”

 

They went back and forth for a few moments, exchanging playful banter until Uzi glanced up and saw the screen flash with her name. Her smirk widened. “Oh, finally. Time to show you all how it’s done.”

 

She stood up, stretching her arms as she made her way to the bowling balls. As she picked one up, she examined it with feigned confidence, trying to act like she knew exactly what she was doing.

 

But the moment she actually held the ball, reality hit her like a truck.

 

She had no idea how to bowl.

 

Her fingers fumbled against the holes, and she suddenly realized she couldn’t even remember the last time she had been to a bowling alley. If she had to guess, she was probably too young to even remember it. And since she never really had constant friends, she never had many opportunities to go out. Which meant she never really got out of the house.

 

Which meant… she had never actually bowled before.

 

Great.

 

Still, it seemed simple enough. Just roll the ball down the lane, right?

 

Uzi tentatively placed her fingers into the holes—unknowingly using the wrong ones—and stepped up to the lane. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a few drones in the neighboring lane throwing their balls, so she quickly decided to copy what they were doing.

 

She took a breath, swung her arm back, and—

 

She launched the ball.

 

It didn’t roll. It didn’t glide smoothly down the lane. It flew.

 

The heavy bowling ball soared through the air for an agonizing second before landing with a loud THUD straight into the gutter.

 

Uzi froze. Her face instantly burned with embarrassment. Oh my robo-god. What the hell was that?

 

Slowly, she turned back to the group, expecting looks of disappointment or second-hand embarrassment.

 

Instead, Thad looked like he had just witnessed the funniest thing in his entire life. His laughter erupted, full-bodied and absolutely relentless, as he clutched his sides like he was in actual pain from how hard he was laughing.

 

Darren and Rebecca were clearly trying not to laugh as well, their faces scrunched in barely-contained amusement.

 

Emily, bless her, at least tried to look sympathetic, but even she had to press her lips together to keep from smiling too much.

 

N, on the other hand, simply looked confused. His head tilted slightly, brows furrowed, but there was also a trace of sympathy in his expression—like he was trying to figure out whether to reassure her or just let her process what just happened.

 

Uzi swallowed thickly, her mortification growing by the second. She had never wanted to disappear more in her life.

 

Thad, still laughing so hard he was practically wheezing, leaned forward against the table for support. “Oh my gosh, Uzi—what was that? Were you trying to throw it into orbit?”

 

Uzi groaned, dragging a hand down her face. “Shut up, dude.”

 

“I mean, seriously, I’ve seen some bad throws, but that was, like, next-level bad,” Thad continued, grinning at her. “You could’ve taken someone out with that thing.”

 

Uzi huffed, crossing her arms. She knew he wasn’t trying to be mean—this was just how Thad was—but that didn’t make her feel any less embarrassed. The worst part was that she had no idea what to do next.

 

Okay, think. What’s the play here?

 

She could laugh it off, pretend she did it on purpose, own the ridiculousness of it. But would that just make it worse? Would it seem like she was trying too hard?

 

Or maybe she should just act like nothing happened. Just go pick up another ball, roll it like a normal drone, and move on. But what if she messed up again? What if she did something even stupider?

 

Why didn’t I just say no to coming here?

 

Before she could spiral any further, she noticed movement from the corner of her eye.

 

N had stood up from his seat and was now walking over to her.

 

Uzi felt immediate relief. The attention wasn’t entirely on her anymore, and she didn’t have to figure out a way to play this off on her own. Thank you, N.

 

When he reached her, he stopped just beside her, hands tucked into the pockets of his jeans. He tilted his head slightly, offering her a small, reassuring smile. “Need some help?”

 

Uzi let out a dramatic sigh, putting a hand on her hip. “Yes, please.”

 

N chuckled. “Alright. When’s the last time you actually went bowling?”

 

Uzi hesitated. “Uhhh…” She frowned, trying to think.

 

N picked up on her hesitation almost immediately. His eyebrows raised slightly. “Wait… do you even know how to bowl?”

 

Uzi sighed again, this time more defeatedly, and looked away. “Not… exactly.”

 

N blinked, then nodded, like that suddenly made everything make sense.

 

Uzi turned back to him. “Since you seem, like, weirdly good at this, do you think you could teach me? Preferably fast, so I don’t have to stand here feeling like an idiot for too long?”

 

N smiled, giving a small nod. “Yeah, of course. It’s not too hard once you get the hang of it.”

 

She exhaled, relieved. “Good. Because I really don’t want to make a fool of myself again.”

 

N nodded. “Alright, first, grab another ball.”

 

Uzi walked over to the ball return, scanning the selection before picking up one that seemed to be the right size. She adjusted her grip, sliding her fingers into the holes, ready to prove she could at least hold the thing correctly.

 

But then she heard N inhale sharply through his teeth. “Uh, not like that.”

 

She looked at him, then down at her hand. “…What’s wrong with it?”

 

N pointed. “Your fingers are in the wrong holes. That grip’s gonna mess up your throw.”

 

Uzi frowned and readjusted, slipping her fingers into a different set of holes. She looked back at N for confirmation.

 

He didn’t say anything right away. Instead, his lips pressed together, and his brows knit slightly.

 

“…Still wrong?” she guessed.

 

“Yeah,” he admitted, looking almost guilty for correcting her again.

 

Uzi huffed. “Okay, well, how am I supposed to—”

 

Before she could finish, N reached out and gently took her hand.

 

Uzi froze.

 

His fingers were careful, guiding hers into the correct placement with ease, adjusting her grip so naturally it was like he’d done this a thousand times before.

 

She knew he wasn’t trying to be weird or anything. He was just trying to help. But still, the sudden contact caught her completely off guard.

 

It had been forever since anyone had touched her like this—so casually, like it was normal. Because for most drones, it was normal.

 

For her, though, it wasn’t.

 

Physical touch wasn’t something she was used to. And, to be blunt, she just… never received it.

 

It wasn’t bad, not in the slightest. Just foreign.

 

Still, she didn’t want to seem like a weirdo by reacting to something as simple as this, so she forced herself to act natural, schooling her expression as he finished adjusting her grip.

 

Once he was done, she cleared her throat and straightened up a bit. “Okay, so… what’s next?”

 

N didn’t seem to notice her momentary awkwardness, thankfully. He stepped back slightly, nodding toward the lane. “Alright, now step up.”

 

She did so, taking a place at the starting point of the lane.

 

N stood beside her, giving her space but still staying close enough to instruct. “So, when you throw the ball, you want to swing your arm forward and release it just before it reaches the lowest point of your swing,” he explained, mimicking the motion himself for her to see. “Like this.”

 

Uzi mimicked him, swinging her arm experimentally. It didn’t feel too complicated.

 

“Yeah, just like that,” N encouraged. “Now, before you actually throw it, you want to step into it. I usually take three steps before I let go of the ball. That way, it gives the throw some momentum.”

 

Uzi nodded, absorbing everything he was saying. “So, put all that together, and that’s it?”

 

“Basically,” N confirmed.

 

Uzi took a breath, refocusing. “Alright. I got this.”

 

She adjusted her stance, gripping the ball properly this time. She took a deep breath, exhaling slowly.

 

Then, with determination, she took three steps forward, swung her arm, and released.

 

The ball rolled down the lane, heading straight for the center. Uzi watched, heart racing slightly—

 

Crash!

 

Seven pins went flying.

 

For a second, she just stood there, processing the fact that she hadn’t thrown it into the gutter again.

 

Then, excitement surged through her.

 

“Oh my gosh!” she exclaimed, spinning around with a triumphant grin. “Did you see that?!

 

N smiled. “Nice! That was a solid hit.”

 

Uzi beamed. “Thank you!”

 

“Hey, no problem,” N said, looking genuinely happy that she was happy. “Glad I could help.”

 

Feeling victorious, Uzi marched back to the seating area, her confidence sky-high now.

 

The second she reached Thad, she crossed her arms and smirked at him. “See that? That was seven whole pins, thank you very much.”

 

Thad snorted, unimpressed. “Oh wow, seven? What an iconic display of skill.”

 

“Hey, that’s more than you got last time,” she shot back.

 

Thad narrowed his eyes, then sighed dramatically. “Touche.”

 

Uzi smirked. “That’s what I thought.”

 

-

 

The rest of the game passed quickly, a blur of neon lights, laughter, and the clatter of bowling pins. Uzi found herself enjoying it more than she expected. At first, she had been hyper-aware of her every move, worried about embarrassing herself again, but as the game progressed, she relaxed into it. It wasn’t about skill— It was about having fun. Even though she wasn’t the best, she still managed a few decent shots, and each time she knocked down more than a couple of pins, she felt a small surge of accomplishment. The energy of the group made it all the more enjoyable, with everyone reacting dramatically to both victories and failures. Emily, in particular, got really into it, hyping people up when they did well and groaning loudly whenever she missed a shot. Meanwhile, N remained consistently good, effortlessly racking up points while the rest of them struggled to keep up.   

 

Eventually, Darren took the final turn, rolling the last ball of the game. A moment later, the scores flashed on the screen.

 

As expected, N had completely dominated, his score ridiculously high compared to the rest. Second place went to Emily, who had apparently been holding out on them with her secret bowling skills. Darren came in third, while Rebecca and Thad were somewhere in the middle.

 

Then Uzi’s eyes landed on the scores again, and she noticed something.

 

She had beaten Thad.

 

By one single pin.

 

A slow, satisfied grin spread across her face. “Well, well, welll,” she said, dragging out the words dramatically as she turned to Thad. “Looks like I beat you.”

 

Thad, who had been casually slipping off his bowling shoes, looked up. “Huh?”

 

“I beat you,” Uzi repeated smugly, pointing at the screen. “One. Single. Pin.”

 

Thad’s eyes snapped to the scoreboard, scanning the numbers. The second he saw it, his expression twisted into one of immediate betrayal.

 

“…Are you kidding me?”

 

Uzi cackled. “This is the best day of my life.”

 

Thad groaned, running a hand down his face. “No. No, this is so dumb. You jinxed me earlier, that’s the only reason you won.”

 

“Oh, I jinxed you?” Uzi repeated mockingly. “Sounds like excuses to me.”

 

Thad huffed, standing up. “Fine. You know what? I’m about to destroy you in the arcade.”

 

Uzi blinked. “Wait, what?”

 

“I’ll get more tickets than you,” Thad declared. “And when I do, I’m gonna rub it in your face just like you’re doing to me right now.


Uzi crossed her arms. “Oh, you think you’re gonna win?”

 

“Oh, I know I’m gonna win,” Thad said, smirking.

 

She scoffed. “That’s funny, ‘cause you also thought you were gonna win this game, and look how that turned out.”

 

Thad narrowed his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up now. Just wait till I get the high score on, like, every game in there.”

 

Uzi was about to respond when she processed what he had said, and remembered—the arcade.

 

She had been so focused on bowling that she had completely forgotten about the fact that this place had an arcade attached to it.

 

And now that she thought about it, she hadn’t been to an arcade in forever.

 

A wave of excitement rushed through her. This night just kept getting better.

 

With a renewed sense of determination, she met Thad’s challenging gaze. “Alright, deal. But just so you know? You’re so losing again.”

 

Thad let out an exaggerated laugh. “We’ll see about that.”

 

At this point, the rest of the group was starting to stand up, slipping back into their normal shoes.

 

“What are you two bickering about now?” Emily asked, raising a brow as she stretched.

 

“Thad’s claims he’ll try to redeem himself in the arcade,” Uzi answered smugly.

 

“I am going to redeem myself in the arcade,” Thad corrected.

 

“Oh, this is gonna be fun,” Darren said, amused.

 

“We should all keep track of tickets,” Rebecca suggested. “Make it a competition.”

 

Emily grinned. “I like that idea.”

 

N, ever the peacemaker, simply smiled. “Either way, it should be fun.”

 

With that, they all gathered their stuff and made their way toward the arcade entrance. The glow of flashing game screens grew brighter as they approached, the sounds of electronic music and beeping machines filling the air.

 

As they reached the counter to purchase credits, Uzi smirked to herself, already plotting which games she was going to dominate.

 

She was not about to let Thad win.

Notes:

This chapter was loooongggg

Love it still though - these next few chapters are gonna focus on like, character building as well as other stuff. They’re gonna be great!

How do yall feel abt Thad and Uzi’s character dynamic? I love writing their interactions and stuff, it’s so fun.

Also like, touch-starved Uzi confirmed? 😭
LMAO that’s a headcannon I have for her so obvi am gonna include it. It only makes sense for her right??

Ok that’s all I have to say for now. See yall in the next chapter!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 10: Claw Machine

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

At the counter, the cashier handed each of them a card, the plastic gleaming under the neon glow of the arcade. Uzi turned hers over in her hands, feeling the smooth surface as she read the name of the place printed in bold letters. It was basically a prepaid credit card, but instead of money, it was loaded with the power to absolutely crush Thad in this challenge.

 

They all stepped away from the counter, forming a small huddle as they considered their next move.

 

Thad, naturally, was the first to throw out an idea. “Alright, here’s the plan—we all split up, hit as many games as we can, and rack up as many tickets as possible. Then, when we meet back up, we’ll see who’s got the most.”

 

Uzi tapped the edge of her card against her palm, considering it. “So we’re basically just running around doing whatever?”

 

“Pretty much,” Thad confirmed with a shrug.

 

“I feel like you just don’t want anyone to get in the way of your ticket count,” Emily accused playfully.

 

Thad smirked. “You caught me.”

 

Darren nodded. “Honestly, it makes sense. More games, more chances for tickets.”

 

Rebecca crossed her arms. “I mean, unless some of us wanted to team up…”

 

They talked it over for a minute, throwing around some different ideas. In the end, though, everyone agreed—splitting up would be the best way to maximize their chances of winning.

 

Thad, now satisfied, turned back to Uzi with a smirk. “You sure you wanna go through with this? You can always back out if you don’t think you can handle losing.”

 

Uzi scoffed. “Oh, please. I’ll have so many tickets, they’re gonna have to sweep me out of here at closing time.”

 

Thad let out a dramatic laugh. “Big words. Let’s see if you can back ‘em up.” Then, before she could come up with a comeback, he bolted in the opposite direction.

 

“Oh, you coward!” Uzi called after him, cupping her hands around her mouth.

 

She grinned, shaking her head as she turned back to the group.

 

“Well,” Emily said, adjusting her bag over her shoulder. “See you all in, what, an hour?”

 

“Guess so,” N said.

 

“Alright, later,” Rebecca said, and with that, everyone exchanged quick goodbyes before heading off in different directions.

 

As Uzi walked forward, she caught sight of Rebecca and Darren leaving together, talking in hushed voices. She raised a brow. “Teaming up, huh?” she muttered to herself.

 

She didn’t think too hard about it, though. Right now, she had one goal.

 

Win.

 

She scanned the arcade floor, taking in the rows of glowing screens, flashing lights, and the chaotic sounds of whirring machines. She grinned, gripping her card tighter.

 

Time to get to work.

 

-

 

Uzi moved from game to game, completely absorbed in the flashing lights and the challenge each one presented. Her reflexes, honed from years of video games, proved to be a huge advantage—she nailed the timing on the basketball hoop game, dominated the reaction-based light-up button challenges, and absolutely obliterated the classic whack-a-mole. Every successful game added tickets to her card, unseen but definitely there, building up her total.

 

She could already imagine the look on Thad’s face when she crushed him.

 

Eventually, her card ran out of credits. With a deep breath, she rolled her shoulders, satisfied with her progress. Now, it was time to meet up with everyone and see where she stood.

 

As she walked through the arcade, something caught her eye—a familiar figure standing in front of a claw machine.

 

N.

 

Curious, she changed course, weaving past other players until she was a few feet behind him. He was standing completely still, eyes locked on the glass, one hand hovering over the joystick. The machine whirred as the claw descended, aiming for a stuffed animal wedged between two others.

 

At the last second, the claw missed entirely, closing around nothing before weakly lifting back up.

 

Uzi, amused, decided to speak up. “Wow, you’re really out here losing to a rigged machine?”

 

N barely reacted at first, just exhaling through his nose as he continued staring at the stuffed animals. His usual calm demeanor was there, but there was a tiny bit of frustration in his expression—eyebrows drawn slightly together, lips pressed in a thin line.

 

“Not losing,” he muttered, glancing at her for a brief second before looking back at the game. “Just... strategizing.”

 

“Right.” Uzi folded her arms, watching as he adjusted his stance and scanned the machine again. “So, you out of credits yet?”

 

“Almost,” N admitted. “I wanted to use the last of them here.”

 

Uzi smirked. “Not giving up, huh?”

 

“Nope.”

 

Uzi eyed the machine for a moment, then shrugged. “Can I try?”

 

N looked at her, then nodded. “Sure. Maybe you’ll have better luck.”

 

N swiped his card for Uzi as she cracked her knuckles, stepping up to the machine. She placed her hands on the joystick and carefully maneuvered the claw, eyes scanning the pile of stuffed animals.

 

One, in particular, stood out—a small, plush, purple cat, slightly off to the side but grabbable.

 

She lined up the claw, took a breath, and pressed the button.

 

The claw descended, its metal pincers closing around the stuffed animal. It lifted, pulling the plush upwards—Uzi could already feel the victory—

 

And then, just before it reached the drop box, the plush slipped right out of the claw’s grip.

 

Uzi’s stomach dropped as she watched the toy fall back into the pile.

 

“You have to be kidding me,” she groaned, slumping slightly.

 

N sighed. “Yeah, that keeps happening.”

 

Frustrated but not willing to let it go just yet, N pulled out his card again and scanned it.

 

When the scan registered, the small screen displayed "0 CREDITS REMAINING."

 

This was it—his last chance.

 

Determined, he placed both hands on the machine, eyes narrowing as he carefully maneuvered the claw. Instead of rushing, he took his time, examining the glass from the side to ensure his aim was just right. A purple cat plushie, the same one Uzi was going for earlier, sat slightly tilted among the others, its soft fabric reflecting the arcade lights. He needed precision.

 

Uzi watched as N made a few final adjustments, barely blinking. Then, with a sharp breath in, he pressed the button.

 

The claw whirred as it descended, its three metal pincers opening wide before closing around the plushie’s middle. For a second, it didn’t move.

 

Then, miraculously, it lifted.

 

N’s posture tensed as the claw slowly carried the plush toward the prize chute. Uzi’s heartbeat quickened with anticipation—she had seen this exact moment go wrong before. Any second now, the stuffed animal would slip free, tumbling back into the heap of prizes below.

 

But this time… it didn’t.

 

The claw reached its destination, hovered briefly, then released.

 

The purple cat plush landed safely in the collection bin.

 

For a second, there was silence.

 

Then N practically exploded with joy.

 

“Yes! Finally!” He pumped his fist into the air, grinning wide.

 

Uzi, though still caught off guard, couldn’t help but laugh. “Okay, I did not think you were gonna get that.”

 

N quickly crouched down, pushing open the small prize flap and pulling the plushie free. He held it up in both hands, inspecting his prize.

 

Now that Uzi had a proper look at it, the stuffed animal was cuter than she expected. It was a round, soft-bodied purple cat with slightly oversized ears, tiny embroidered whiskers, and an expression that was somewhere between sleepy and smug. It wasn’t the highest quality—she could tell the stitching wasn’t perfect, and the fur looked a little synthetic—but yet still fluffy and had an undeniable charm to it.

 

Uzi glanced at N, who was still smiling down at it like he’d just won the lottery. Something about the whole moment made her grin, too.

 

N held onto the plush for a moment longer, his fingers idly brushing over the soft fabric. Then, without hesitation, he turned to Uzi and held it out to her.

 

“Here,” he said simply. “You take it.”

 

Uzi blinked. She looked at the plush, then at him, then back at the plush.

 

“…Huh?”

 

“You were trying to get this one earlier, right?” N tilted his head. “So, you should keep it.”

 

Uzi didn’t take it. Instead, she crossed her arms, giving him a skeptical look. “No way. You literally earned that thing. I’m not just gonna take it from you.”

 

N shook his head, still holding it out. “I don’t really need it,” he said with a light shrug. “Besides, you almost won it before me, so it makes sense you should have it.”

 

Uzi didn’t know what to say to that.

 

This didn’t make sense. She hadn’t almost won it—she had failed. He was the one who had used his last credits, the one who spent all that time trying, and now he was just… *giving* it away? Like it was nothing?

 

Her gut reaction was to refuse again. Because if she took it, she’d owe him something—right? That’s how things usually worked. Drones didn’t just give you things without expecting something in return. That was just… basic logic, to Uzi at least.

 

And yet, there was no catch here.

 

N wasn’t waiting for her to offer something back. He wasn’t teasing her, wasn’t holding it over her head, wasn’t asking for a favor. He was just standing there, smiling, offering her the plush like it was the most normal thing in the world.

 

It made her feel weirdly off balance.

 

After a moment, she let out a short breath. He was probably just going to keep insisting until she gave in, so there was no point in arguing.

 

“F…Fine,” she mumbled. Then, as she reached out to take it, she cursed herself for hesitating. Her fingers barely brushed the fabric before she realized, too late, that her voice had stuttered.

 

She forced herself to clear her throat and straighten up, gripping the plush tighter as she pulled it to her chest. “I mean—uh. Thanks. Or whatever.”

 

For a second, she thought she saw something in N’s expression—like he’d noticed that small slip-up. But if he did, he didn’t comment on it.

 

Instead, he just nodded, then stretched his arms behind his head. “We should probably go find the others,” he said. “They’re probably waiting for us.”

 

“Yeah. Sure,” Uzi said quickly, eager to move on from whatever *that* was.

 

As she followed N through the arcade, she absentmindedly squeezed the plush in her hands, still trying to process what had just happened.

Notes:

Gonna try and post like 2-3 chapters today

I’ve been so busy omfg, I’m so tired bro 😩

I do have a lot pre-written, but I js have like zero time to edit and post it yk

Today I finally have some time though which is great, and like next week I have a lotta free time so hopefully I can post a lot

I haven’t told yall exactly how much I’ve pre-written yet, but ig I’ll say now. I have like, 30 chapters total (including the already posted ones) made 😭 but still gotta go through and edit it yk

And I have a confession… tbh sometimes I js write more cuz like istg in these later chapters im absolutely cooking, like rn I’m writing chapter 29 (30?) and there’s so much going on and it’s really progressing 🤭

And I have a great idea of where to go next after that part, there’s like little arcs in this story ig so like I’m almost to the 3rd one?

What I mean by arcs is like, you can break it down. This chapter as well as the next few detail the hang out of Uzi’s new friend group, so this is like the first arc. But, after that shit goes downnnn… but no spoilers 🤭🫣

And then now I’m js so excited where it’s going next cuz I have like the best idea ever and I love it

Ok I’m gonna stop rambling and like really sorry for being so vague, js don’t wanna ‘ruin the surprise’ of the story yk 😭🤚

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 11: Tickets

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi and N were the first to reach the ticket counter, standing near the machine that scanned their cards. The machine had a bright screen, flashing colorful animations as it waited for someone to scan their balance. Not long after, Thad arrived, immediately eyeing Uzi with a smug expression.

 

“Hope you’re ready to lose,” he quipped, crossing his arms.

 

Uzi scoffed. “You wish. You’re just trying to act tough before your inevitable loss.”

 

Before Thad could fire back, Emily strolled up, looking relaxed and content, as if she wasn’t concerned about the results at all. Shortly after, Darren and Rebecca arrived together, hands loosely intertwined. The second they saw the rest of the group, though, they tentatively let go.

 

Uzi noticed that. She wasn’t about to say anything, but yeah—that was suspicious.

 

Everyone talked for a moment, joking and making small talk before they had to decide who was scanning first. Uzi smirked, nudging Thad.

 

“You should go first,” she suggested, faux sweetly. “Get it over with so you can accept your loss early.”

 

Thad rolled his eyes, flipping his card between his fingers. “Nah, I’m saving the best for last. I don’t want to set the bar *too* high this soon.”

 

N chuckled and stepped forward. “I’ll go first, then.”

 

He scanned his card, and after a short beep, his total appeared on the screen. A solid 1,200 tickets.  Not bad—not crazy high, but not the lowest either.

 

Darren went next, followed by Rebecca. When their numbers flashed onto the screen, it was noticeably lower than N’s.

 

Thad snorted. “That’s all you guys got? What, were you playing games wrong or something?”

 

Emily, without missing a beat, rolled her eyes and spoke up, “Maybe if they hadn’t left to have an immoral make-out session, they’d have more tickets.”

 

Darren and Rebecca exchanged glances, and instead of denying it, they just shrugged like they didn’t really care.

 

Yeah. They’re definitely dating, Uzi thought. It made sense—they’d been flirting the entire time they were here.

 

Thad, never one to miss an opportunity, grinned. “Wow. Priorities, huh?”

 

N just shook his head with a knowing sigh.

 

Uzi stepped forward next, swiping her card confidently. The number popped up:1,650 tickets. More than N, Darren, and Rebecca.

 

She silently celebrated, smirking at Thad. This was her win.

 

Thad raised an eyebrow. “Alright, alright. Not bad. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves here.”

 

Then Emily went up. She scanned her card, and—

 

2,200 tickets.

 

Uzi’s confidence immediately wavered.

 

Thad, despite looking mildly concerned, crossed his arms and scoffed. “Pfft. That’s nothing. I definitely got more.”

 

Uzi side-eyed him. “You sound pretty unsure for someone who’s ‘saving the best for last.’”

 

Darren raised an eyebrow at Emily, looking mildly impressed. “Didn’t take you for the gamer type.”

 

Emily shrugged, completely unbothered. “I’ve got a lot of free time when I’m not studying or doing homework, so I play video games.”

 

Uzi hummed internally at that. Yeah… same. Except I play video games regardless of whether I should be studying or not. She frowned slightly at her own thought. I should probably work on that. Eventually.

 

Meanwhile, Thad strolled up to the machine, practically radiating confidence. “Alright, prepare to witness greatness.” He swiped his card, standing tall as he awaited the results.

 

The machine beeped. The number appeared on the screen.

 

1,650 tickets.

 

Thad froze, his grin slowly fading as he stared at the screen in disbelief. He turned to Uzi, looking personally offended.

 

Uzi burst out laughing. “No way! You were talking so much crap, just to tie with me? All that confidence for this?”

 

Thad scowled. “Okay, first of all , neither of us won anyway, so it doesn’t even matter.” His voice held a distinct note of defeat.

 

Uzi smirked. “Uh-huh. Sounds like an excuse to me.”

 

Before Thad could come up with a comeback, N cut in. “Well, Emily’s the actual winner here.”

 

Emily crossed her arms, looking very satisfied with herself. “What can I say? Skill issue.”

 

Thad rolled his eyes, and Uzi snorted.

 

Then Emily clapped her hands together. “Alright, since I am the undisputed champion, I declare that we all go spend our tickets. No point in hoarding them.”

 

No one argued with that. It was time to hit the ticket shop.

 

-

 

The prize counter stretched before them, lit by cheap fluorescent lights that only seemed to emphasize just how underwhelming the selection was. Rows of plastic bins were filled with the kind of prizes that screamed bought in bulk from the lowest bidder—tiny plastic figurines, flimsy yo-yos, rubber bouncy balls that looked like they’d roll under a couch and never be seen again. The candy selection wasn’t much better. If the faded wrappers and slightly melted appearance were anything to go by, these had probably been sitting here way past their expiration date.

 

Uzi glanced past it all, scanning the shelves in mild disappointment. Okay, yeah, these prizes suck. She wasn’t sure what she had expected—maybe something slightly worth all the effort they put into those games? But then again, it wasn’t really about the prizes, was it? It was about the experience. The fun of the challenge. That’s what she told herself, at least.

 

Around her, the others were already picking out their prizes—Emily grabbed a handful of candy, Darren and Rebecca were going for some ridiculous plastic sunglasses, and Thad, naturally, was stockpiling as many random trinkets as his tickets would allow. Uzi could already tell half this stuff was going to be lost or forgotten within a week.

 

Just as she was about to settle on something small just for the sake of spending her tickets, something else caught her eye.

 

A small, green plush dog sat on the shelf, positioned just a little higher than the rest of the cheap stuffed animals. It wasn’t great quality, but compared to the other plush toys, it was practically luxury. It had floppy ears, a round little nose, and soft-looking fur that actually seemed worth touching. A quick glance at the price told her why—this one was 1,500 tickets, three times the cost of the smaller, bulk-quality ones.

 

She hesitated for a moment, debating if she really wanted to spend her hard-earned tickets on this—until an idea clicked into place.

 

N.

 

He had given her the purple cat plushie without hesitation, despite having used the last of his credits to win it. The memory of that moment flashed through her mind, and she instinctively looked down at the cat plush in her arms. She clutched it a little tighter, her fingers pressing into its soft fur. He gave this to me without expecting anything in return. So… wouldn’t it only be fair to do the same for him?

 

The thought of handing the plush dog to N, watching his reaction, seeing if he’d be surprised—or happy—it made something flutter in her chest.

 

That was it, then. Decision made.

 

Uzi stepped forward, nodding to the drone at the counter. “That one,” she said, pointing to the green dog. She swiped her card, the machine beeped, and just like that—1,500 tickets gone.

 

As she picked it up, she turned it over in her hands, examining it closely. It was lighter than she expected, but soft. The floppy ears dangled slightly as she shifted it, and despite how cheap it probably was, she was oddly pleased with it.

 

Now, all she had to do was give it to him.

 

Uzi approached N, clutching the green dog plush tightly in her hands. N, standing near the counter, was shoving the last of his ticket-bought candy into his pocket. When he noticed her approaching, he turned to her with his usual bright-eyed expression.

 

“What’s up?” he asked casually.

 

Uzi didn’t answer right away. Instead, she thrust the stuffed animal forward, offering it to him without much explanation.

 

N blinked, clearly confused. He looked at the plush, then at her, tilting his head slightly. “Uh… what’s this?”

 

Uzi felt heat creep up her neck, and suddenly, this whole thing felt way more embarrassing than it had in her head. She quickly averted her gaze, mumbling under her breath. “Just—just take it.”

 

N didn’t move to grab it. His confused expression deepened. “But—why?”

 

Uzi tightened her grip on the plush for a moment, pressing her lips together. Why am I doing this? She knew the answer—because he had given her the cat. Because it only felt fair. But at the same time, this felt weird. Like she was making a big deal out of something that should’ve been simple. Why does this feel so embarrassing? It’s just a dumb stuffed animal. It’s not like I’m confessing some deep secret. And yet, standing here, waiting for him to just take it, she felt… vulnerable.

 

She swallowed, forcing herself to speak. “You gave me the cat, so… I figured I’d get you something too,” she muttered, still not looking at him.

 

N hesitated, staring at her as if trying to figure out if she was serious. “You didn’t have to do that,” he said, sounding genuinely surprised.

 

Uzi cut him off before he could say anything else, pushing the plush into his hands. “Just take it,” she insisted, her voice coming out sharper than intended.

 

N barely had time to react before the stuffed dog was shoved into his arms. He looked down at it, then back at her, his expression shifting into something softer.

 

“…Thanks, Uzi,” he said sincerely.

 

Uzi’s face burned. She crossed her arms, looking away sharply. “Yeah, whatever,” she replied, trying to sound indifferent. She rubbed her cheek as if that would somehow cool the heat spreading across her face.

 

Before N could say anything else, a voice interrupted.

 

“There you two slowpokes done yet?”

 

Thad stood a few feet away, holding an armful of random prizes and munching on a piece of candy. His tone was casual, but Uzi caught the brief flicker of something on his face when he glanced between her and N—a split-second shift in his expression, like mild disgust or irritation. It was so quick that most wouldn’t have noticed. But Uzi did.

 

What was that? 

 

The moment passed as fast as it came, and Thad was back to his usual self, rolling his eyes. “C’mon, you’re taking forever,” he said, popping another piece of candy into his mouth.

 

Uzi quickly shoved her thoughts aside, assuming he was just annoyed at how long she was dragging this out. She smirked. “Oh, I’m so sorry, Thad, am I interrupting your very important  candy consumption?”

 

Thad scoffed, then spoke with his mouth full,”Hey, this is premium-grade, arcade-quality sugar, and I intend to enjoy every bit of it.”

 

Uzi snorted. “Yeah, enjoy that stomachache later.”

 

As she started walking, N followed behind them, still holding the plush dog. Thad rolled his eyes at her but didn’t argue, leading the way as they all headed out.

 

As they walked toward the exit, Emily, who was a few steps ahead, suddenly turned around. “Hey, Uzi, are you coming to hang out with us after this?”

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard. “Uh… we’re doing something after?”

 

“Yeah, we’re all going to Rebecca’s place,” Emily said casually.

 

Uzi pulled out her phone and checked the time—almost 9 p.m. She thought about it for a second. It could be fun, but there was one issue. “I don’t have a ride,” she admitted.

 

Emily tilted her head. “How’d you even get here if you didn’t have a ride?”

 

“I took the bus,” Uzi said simply. “I don’t have a car.”

 

Emily hummed in understanding, but then frowned. “Yeah… that’d be a problem. Rebecca lives in a gated neighborhood.”

 

Uzi made a mental note of that—she hadn’t known Rebecca was wealthy, but now that she thought about it, it made sense. The designer handbag she always carried, the pristine condition of her expensive-looking clothes, the way she never seemed concerned about money—it all fit together now.

 

Uzi glanced down at her own outfit. All my clothes are either thrifted or gifts, she thought. Not that I care. I like the way I dress. Fashion trends and fast fashion never really mattered much to her anyway.

 

She must have zoned out because Emily suddenly called her name. “Uzi?”

 

Uzi blinked and looked back at her.

 

Emily gave a small smile. “It sucks that you can’t go, but it was fun hanging out with you today.”

 

Uzi nodded, stuffing her phone back into her pocket. “Yeah… it was.”

 

As Emily turned back around, N suddenly spoke up. "Uh, sorry for eavesdropping, but… I could drive you if you want."

 

Uzi turned to him, surprised. “Wait, really?”

 

N nodded. “Yeah, I don’t mind. I was going anyway.”

 

For a moment, she just stared at him. It wasn’t like she was going to refuse—this was the best possible outcome—but still, the offer caught her off guard. She hadn’t even considered the possibility. “That’d be great, actually,” she said, and her excitement bled through her voice before she could stop it.

 

It had been so long since she’d gone to someone’s house just to hang out. Everything about today had gone so well, better than she ever expected. But that thought made her overthink. Things don’t just go this well. Something has to go wrong, right? It didn’t make sense, but it nagged at the back of her mind. Still, she pushed it aside. Whatever. No point in ruining it with paranoia.

 

Emily beamed. “That’s perfect, then!”

 

They chatted for a bit longer as they crossed the parking lot. Eventually, Emily waved as she headed toward Rebecca’s car, and Uzi waved back.

 

Thad, who had been off in his own world, finally seemed to register the conversation. “Wait—you’re coming?”

 

“Yeah,” Uzi said. “N’s driving me.”

 

Thad’s expression barely flickered, but Uzi caught it—just a brief moment of something, like he was thrown off. It was subtle enough that she almost ignored it. Huh. Weird.

 

He recovered quickly, shrugging. “Well, guess I’ll see you there, then.”

 

“Guess so.”

 

Thad muttered something about calling shotgun before jogging off toward Rebecca’s car, Darren trailing behind. Uzi turned toward N, and the two started walking toward his.

Notes:

Ofc I had to make Rebecca and Darren dating, it’s *basically* cannon after all. I don’t remember if it’s js implied or if it’s 100% confirmed. I don’t feel like checking the wiki rn 😭

Also if you noticed, I kind of referenced the cabin fever episode in the beginning of this chapter 🤭 like where Rebecca and Darren are going to find a place to make out, and Emily makes a comment abt it

But instead of it being a whole, happy kinda thing, they both get brutally murdered and eaten by Uzi so yeah 😃👍 LMAO

And lowkey abt Rebecca’s character, she’s like, what could be considered a lot nicer in this story ig. Cuz she’s basically one of those bitchy “gossip girls” in the show, but here she’s not as fake ig. Js wanted to expand on her character

Ik Lizzy is super bitchy to her in the show through, but even then Rebecca tried to be included ig, but it’s really minor cuz like it’s not relevant and the parts abt that are usually for comedic purposes if u remember (like when Lizzy tells everyone to insult Rebecca instead of V during prom 😭)

Speaking of Lizzy, for her, ik she was kinda nice to Uzi in the first/second chapter of my story, but I see her as one of those girls that’s nice to you in person, but then talks shit and makes comments abt u as soon as you leave the room. Ugh I can’t stand people like that 😩

Do you agree with that? Ig it could be considered a headcannon cuz Lizzy is like, directly rude to Uzi in the show and doesn’t gaf abt comments. Ig I js wanted to expand on that yk, cuz it js makes sense to me personally.

Ok lastly, did u notice that one thing? Ik that’s very vague, but I'm kinda hinting at something that will be relevant later 🤭 feel free to leave theories abt what I’m talking abt 😍

Oh and it’s not abt N and Uzi, it’s abt someone else 🫢

I wanna add sm lore/layers to this story, I already have a whole thing going yk but it’s technically too early rn to be able to establish it in a way that makes sense without spoilers

So ig you’ll js have to wait and see 😈 *insert evil laughing*

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 12: Car Ride

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi slid into the passenger seat, adjusting herself as she reached for her seatbelt. A second passed, and she realized N hadn't entered the driver’s side yet.

 

She turned her head slightly, catching sight of him in the rearview mirror. He had gone to the back instead, carefully setting the green stuffed dog onto the seat. She watched as he hesitated for a second, then gave the plush a small, almost affectionate pat on the head before gently closing the door.

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard. Huh. That was… kind of sweet. He didn’t just toss it carelessly like it was nothing—he actually took care placing it there.

 

She felt a smile creeping onto her face before she even realized it. She quickly wiped it away, straightening up and looking straight ahead. No need to be weird about it. It’s just a stuffed animal. Nothing to overthink.

 

A moment later, N finally got into the driver’s seat, turning the key in the ignition. As he backed out of the parking space, Uzi spoke up. “Thanks for driving me, by the way. I appreciate it.”

 

N glanced at her briefly before focusing back on the road. “No problem. I’m happy to help.” His voice was light, casual, as like it was no big deal at all.

 

As they pulled onto the main road, Uzi leaned back into the seat. “So… what are we even doing at Rebecca’s house?”

 

N shrugged. “Same thing we always do. Just hanging out.”

 

“Her place is the go-to spot or something?”

 

“Pretty much.”

 

Uzi raised an eyebrow. “Why hers, though?”

 

“She’s got a big house,” N said simply. “And her parents are rich, so there’s, like, tons of space.”

 

“Yeah, I kind of figured she had money,” Uzi muttered, thinking back to Rebecca’s expensive-looking handbag and the pristine designer clothes she always wore. Meanwhile, I’m rocking my thrift store special, but whatever. “What do her parents do?”

 

N hummed in thought. “Not really sure. I think they own a business or something. Whatever it is, it makes a lot.”

 

Uzi nodded, looking out the window. She hadn’t been paying much attention before, but now she noticed tiny droplets forming against the glass. Within seconds, the light drizzle turned into a steady rain.

 

She watched as the water blurred the city lights outside, the world beyond the car taking on a softer, more dreamlike quality. “Oh, nice,” she murmured. “I love the rain.”

 

N glanced at her, seeming mildly surprised. “Really?”

 

“Yeah,” Uzi said, still looking outside. “It’s nice. The way it sounds, the way everything looks... it’s kinda peaceful.”

 

N chuckled, resting his arm against the window as he drove. “Huh. I guess I’m the opposite. I like sunny days way more.”

 

Uzi turned her head toward him. “Why?”

 

“Sunny weather just makes me happy, I guess,” N said, a small smile tugging at his lips. “Rain feels kinda… sad to me. Like the sky is crying or something.”

 

Uzi huffed, amused. “That’s dramatic.”

 

N laughed, his grip on the steering wheel relaxing slightly. “Maybe.”

 

The car ride was quiet, aside from the sound of rain pattering against the windows and the steady hum of the engine. The occasional streetlight cast fleeting shadows across the dashboard as they passed through the dimly lit streets.

 

Uzi absentmindedly reached into her pocket, pulling out her phone and wire headphones. She scrolled through her playlist, her thumb hovering over the screen as she decided what to listen to.

 

But before she could put her headphones in, she hesitated.

 

She stole a glance at N, who was focused on the road, his expression relaxed. Something about the calmness of the moment made her want to say something—something real.

 

“…Hey, uh.” She paused, gripping her phone a little tighter. “I just wanted to say that I really appreciate this. All of this.”

 

N glanced at her, a little curious but listening.

 

“It’s been a long time since I’ve hung out with anyone,” Uzi admitted. “Like, an actual group of drones. I kinda forgot what that was even like.”

 

She exhaled, almost laughing at herself. It was strange, being this open, but at the same time… it wasn’t uncomfortable. Maybe because she was starting to trust N, even though they’d only known each other for a short time. It felt weird, sure, but in a way that was almost nice.

 

N’s expression softened. “I’m really glad you came,” he said sincerely. “I had a lot of fun hanging out with you. And everyone else, of course.” He chuckled.

 

Uzi smirked slightly, but said nothing, letting him continue.

 

“I dunno, I just… I would’ve felt bad not inviting you,” N admitted. “Even though we just met the other day, leaving you out didn’t really sit right with me.”

 

His hands tightened a bit on the steering wheel, and his voice grew quieter. “When I was younger, drones used to exclude me from everything. I never really understood why.”

 

There was a brief silence between them, filled only by the sound of rain.

 

N exhaled, shaking his head. “I just don’t want anyone else to feel like that. The idea of someone going through that too, feeling like they’re not wanted, like they don’t belong— it just —…”

 

Uzi felt something deep in her chest tighten.

 

She knew exactly how that felt.

 

“I get it,” she said after a pause, her voice quieter than before. “I’ve been there too.”

 

N looked at her, as if sensing there was more to it. But Uzi didn’t go into detail, and he didn’t push her to.

 

It still felt strange to talk about—dredging up old wounds she’d spent so long ignoring—but, for once, it didn’t feel bad.

 

The rain had started to come down heavier, droplets streaking across the car windows and blurring the glow of the passing streetlights. Uzi rested her head against the cool glass, her headphones in, music filling her ears as she took in the scene outside. The cityscape was alive in the night, despite the late hour—neon signs from gas stations and fast-food restaurants flickered in the distance, their colors bleeding into the wet pavement. Billboards loomed over the road, advertising things she didn't care enough to read. The glow of passing headlights reflected off the raindrops clinging to the window, making the world outside look like a moving painting, shifting and warping with each drop that trailed down the glass.

 

The rhythmic swish of the windshield wipers grew faster as the rain intensified. Through the glass, Uzi could faintly see N’s reflection, his features slightly distorted. His usual relaxed demeanor was gone—his expression was focused, eyes locked on the road, hands gripping the wheel just a little tighter as he navigated through the rain-slick streets.

 

Minutes passed, the car rolling steadily forward through the quiet roads. Eventually, the speed limit dropped, and N eased his foot off the gas. The car slowed as they reached a turn, the road curving toward an entrance lined with tall iron gates. The automatic gate mechanism blinked red for a moment before flashing green, and the heavy gates groaned as they parted.

 

As they pulled in, Uzi’s eyes widened.

 

Rebecca’s house was big— no, massive was a better word for it. The place looked like a mansion. It stood tall with sleek, modern architecture, all sharp angles and huge windows that reflected the rain-streaked night. The exterior was a mix of dark stone and smooth white paneling, looking more like something from a high-end magazine than an actual home. Large, evenly spaced lights lined the driveway, illuminating the perfectly manicured lawn. A grand staircase led up to a towering front entrance, complete with a polished wooden door that looked more expensive than her entire wardrobe.

 

Uzi had expected Rebecca to be rich, but this? This was another level. Rich almost felt like an understatement.

 

N pulled into the driveway, the tires crunching softly against the wet pavement before the car rolled to a stop.

 

Outside, the rain hadn’t let up—it pounded against the car roof, filling the silence between them. Uzi sighed, realizing they’d have to make a run for it unless they wanted to be soaked by the time they reached the door.

 

Uzi quickly yanked the headphones out of her ears, wrapping the cords tightly around her phone before stuffing it into her pocket. It was time. N glanced over at her with a half-smile, his eyes gleaming with that familiar relaxed energy.

 

"You ready?" he asked, his voice light despite the downpour outside.

 

Uzi pulled the hood of her hoodie up, a small nod accompanying her response. "Ready," she said with a grin.

 

Without another word, they both sprang out of the car, the cold rush of rain soaking them almost instantly. Uzi’s feet hit the pavement with a soft splash, the wet ground sucking at her sneakers as they sprinted toward the front steps. The rain came down in sheets, drenching them within moments. Uzi could barely see ahead as the water blurred her vision, but she couldn’t help but laugh when she noticed N in front of her, his hands over his head in a futile attempt to shield himself.

 

She chuckled, her voice almost drowned out by the sound of the rain, “Nice try, N.”

 

He glanced back at her, shaking his head with a mock glare before laughing lightly.

 

The two of them continued to run up the slick stairs, each of them slipping slightly on the wet steps, struggling to keep their balance as they made their way to the front door. The rain hit harder now, a steady drumming on their clothes. Uzi almost lost her footing completely at one point, but she caught herself with a quick grab on the railing.

 

Finally, they reached the door. Uzi let out a sigh of relief as she pushed the doorbell several times in quick succession. The last thing she needed was to be caught out in this rain for longer.

 

She looked at N, who was drenched from head to toe, his hair sticking to his forehead, his shirt plastered to his frame. She was about to make a joke, to call him out on how ridiculous he looked, but then she noticed the weight of her own drenched clothes. The hoodie clung to her like a second skin, her sleeves heavy with water that dripped steadily onto the porch.

 

For a moment, she just stared at him, both of them equally soaked, the realization making her stop in her tracks. She couldn’t say anything, though, because she felt just as ridiculous as he did.

 

Before either of them could comment on their soaked states, the door opened. It was Darren, looking unphased as he greeted them with a friendly smile.

 

"Looks like you two took your time," he said, amused.

 

Without waiting for a response, the two of them hurried inside, shaking off the worst of the water as they shut the door behind them. They were finally out of the rain.

Notes:

Hiiiii

Gonna try and post a bunch of chapters today. Can’t wait! There’s gonna be a lot going on soon… *subtle foreshadowing*

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 13: Lightning and Thunder

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

As soon as Uzi stepped inside, she stretched out her arms slightly, grimacing as the cold, damp fabric of her hoodie clung uncomfortably to her skin. Water dripped from the hem of her sleeves, forming a small puddle at her feet. She shifted, trying to shake some of the moisture off, but it was useless—she was completely drenched.

 

Darren, taking one look at the two of them, gave a quick nod. “Be right back,” he said before darting up the massive staircase.

 

Now that she wasn’t focused on running through the rain, Uzi had a chance to actually take in her surroundings. The house was… again, massive. Directly in front of her was a grand staircase, polished and elegant, leading up to what she could only assume was the second floor. The walls were a soft cream color, accented with ornate moldings that looked expensive—because, obviously, they were. A large chandelier hung above them, its crystals shimmering under the warm glow of the light. The floors, sleek and marble, reflected the light, making the already massive foyer feel even larger.

 

Everything about this place screamed luxury, from the subtle gold accents on the furniture to the perfectly arranged decor pieces that looked more like art displays than actual things drones used. It was surreal.

 

She couldn’t help but compare it to her own home—her cramped but familiar living space, decorated with cheap furniture without much thought. Compared to this, she might as well have been living in some run-down shack. That thought made her feel a little weird, but at the same time, she couldn’t deny how stunning the house was. As over-the-top as it seemed, she had to respect it.

 

Before she could dwell on it too much, Rebecca came rushing down the stairs, holding a stack of towels in her arms. “Here, take these,” she said, out of breath but moving quickly. She handed one to N, then another to Uzi, before immediately dropping to the floor and frantically wiping up the water they had tracked in.

 

Uzi took the towel, quickly wrapping it around herself in an attempt to stop any more water from dripping onto the pristine floor. “I don’t think this is gonna help much,” she muttered, pulling at her soaked sleeves.

 

Rebecca, still scrubbing at the floor, looked up. “I could grab you a change of clothes,” she offered.

 

Uzi paused. “Oh, uh—”

 

Rebecca barely gave her time to think before turning to N. “You too. I doubt you want to sit around in wet clothes all night.”

 

N, already patting his hair down with the towel, gave an appreciative smile. “Yeah, that’d be great. Thanks, Rebecca.”

 

Uzi pulled the towel tighter around herself, taking a step forward. “Where should I—?”

 

Rebecca, already anticipating the question, stood up and dusted off her hands. “You guys can change down here in the guest bathroom. No offense, but I don’t want you dripping all over the carpet upstairs.” She gestured toward a hallway near the staircase. “Just wait here, I’ll grab you both something dry.”

 

And with that, she spun around and hurried back up the stairs, leaving Uzi and N standing there, still drenched, towels in hand.

 

-

 

Uzi followed Rebecca up the wide staircase, her bare feet sinking slightly into the plush carpet with each step. The oversized graphic T-shirt she was wearing—featuring the face of a well-known pop singer—hung loosely on her frame, the fabric soft but unfamiliar. Not exactly her style, but a shirt was a shirt. At least the pajama shorts were nice, deep purple and incredibly comfortable. She had to admit, Rebecca had good taste when it came to loungewear.

 

As she walked, she glanced up at N, who was a few steps ahead of her. He had been given a dark gray zip-up hoodie, the sleeves slightly long on him, and black sweatpants with a subtle brand logo stitched into the side. They looked absurdly comfortable. Uzi quickly looked away before she found herself thinking about that too much.

 

Rebecca led them to a doorway at the end of the hall, pushing it open to reveal the media room. The space was massive, just like everything else in this house. The walls were painted in warm neutral tones, and the floor was fully carpeted, matching the aesthetic of the rest of the home. A full reclining sofa set was arranged in a semi-circle facing the far wall, where a projector was mounted near the back of the room. A large, blank screen took up most of the wall opposite the seating area, waiting for a movie to be played. The lighting was dim but cozy, casting a soft glow over the room.

 

The place was already occupied—Thad was sprawled lazily across one of the reclining chairs, one arm hanging over the side as he lazily popped pieces of popcorn into his mouth. On the floor, Emily and Darren sat cross-legged, engaged in what looked like a card game, their conversation filling the quiet space.

 

As soon as Uzi and N entered, the others took notice.

 

“Oh, finally,” Thad drawled, sitting up slightly with an exaggerated sigh. “I thought you drowned in the bathroom or something. Took you forever.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes, unfazed. “Wow. Hilarious,” she deadpanned, walking past him.

 

Thad just laughed, shaking his head as he went back to his popcorn.

 

Rebecca led them further into the room. N plopped down onto the couch, looking relaxed as he leaned back into the cushions. Meanwhile, Uzi stuck close to Rebecca, deciding to sit with her instead.

 

Uzi turned to Rebecca, shifting her weight slightly as she asked, "So, what exactly are we going to do?" She hesitated for a second before adding, "It’s been a while since I’ve hung out with a group like this."

 

Rebecca grinned. "We’re thinking of watching a movie and maybe playing a board game or two. Nothing crazy, just chilling."

 

Uzi nodded, satisfied with the answer. "Sounds good."

 

As the conversation continued around her, she pulled out her phone, noticing the time—almost 10. A slight pang of guilt hit her. She’d completely forgotten to text her dad. Quickly, she typed out a message, letting him know she’d be home late and was at a friend’s house. She didn’t want him worrying about where she was. With that done, she put her phone back in her pocket and relaxed, feeling a bit more at ease.

 

Looking over at Emily and Darren, who were still engaged in their card game, she leaned in slightly. "Mind if I join?" she asked. They nodded, welcoming her in, and she grabbed a spot on the floor with them.

 

-

 

The night carried on with lighthearted fun. The group played a few rounds of different games, ranging from cards to a board game that got way too competitive way too fast. Laughter filled the room as Thad accused Darren of cheating, while Rebecca playfully told him to stop being a sore loser.

 

After a while, the group started debating over what movie to watch. Suggestions flew around, but the conversation ultimately leaned toward horror. N and Emily were the only ones hesitant, clearly not fans of the genre, but the majority vote won out.

 

Once the decision was made, everyone settled into their spots. The lights went off, and the movie began. The only sources of light were the glow from the projector and the occasional flashes of lightning outside. The sound of rain pelting the roof above only added to the eerie atmosphere.

 

Uzi couldn’t help but love it. Horror movies were her favorite, and something about the storm outside made it even better. It felt… cinematic, in a way. Everything about tonight had been going so well, and for once, she wasn’t overthinking it. She leaned back, fully immersing herself in the moment, the faintest smile tugging at her lips.

 

A deafening clap of thunder suddenly roared through the sky, shaking the walls ever so slightly. Almost immediately, the entire house was plunged into darkness. The projector flickered off, leaving the group in complete blackness.

 

Thad let out an overly dramatic gasp. "Oh my gosh! We're gonna die!"

 

Uzi, unimpressed, rolled her eyes even though no one could see it. "Shut up, Thad," she said flatly.

 

Before anyone could say anything else, a small beam of light cut through the darkness—Darren had turned on the flashlight on his phone. Taking his cue, the rest of them did the same, the room slowly becoming illuminated by several dim, bluish-white beams. The shifting lights cast long, eerie shadows across the walls and furniture.

 

Emily, squinting in the sudden brightness, turned to Rebecca. "Is there anything we can do to turn the power back on?"

 

Rebecca sighed, pulling out her own phone. "No clue," she admitted. "My parents aren’t even home—they’re on some work trip. And…" She frowned at her screen, tapping at it a few times before groaning. "Great. WiFi’s out, too. So I can’t even message them to ask."

 

Thad groaned dramatically. "How long is this gonna last?"

 

Rebecca shot him an unimpressed look, exasperation clear in her tone. "I don’t know, Thad. Do I look like I control the weather?"

 

Thad grumbled something under his breath but didn’t push further.

 

A brief silence fell over the group, the only sounds being the rain drumming against the house and the occasional distant rumble of thunder. N glanced over at Rebecca. "So… what now?"

 

Rebecca hesitated, glancing around at the group. Then, with a small shrug, she said, "I mean… we could play a game?"

 

Uzi raised a brow. "A game? What kind of game?"

 

Rebecca smirked slightly, tilting her head. "I dunno yet. But we might as well do something while we wait for the power to come back."

 

Darren leaned forward, the glow of his phone flashlight casting shadows across his face. "Alright, how about we play Paranoia?"

 

Emily furrowed her brow. "What’s that?"

 

Darren grinned. "I played it at a party once. It’s pretty fun—basically, we all sit in a circle. The person who goes first whispers a question to the person on their right. It’s usually something like, ‘Who here would be most likely to blank?’ or ‘Who would you blank with?’—you get the idea." He waved his hand vaguely. "The person who gets asked has to say a name out loud, answering the question, but no one else knows what the question actually was except for the two people involved."

 

Thad blinked. "Wait, so the rest of us are just sitting here confused while people randomly call each other out?"

 

"Pretty much," Darren confirmed. "But then we flip a coin—or, like, a flip-flop or whatever if we don’t have one. If it lands face up, whoever who asked the question has to say it out loud. If it lands face down, the question stays a mystery forever."

 

Emily raised an eyebrow. "That sounds so sketchy."

 

"Yeah, but that’s what makes it fun," Darren countered with a smirk. "At the party I went to, we played it with a truth-or-dare twist. Some drones added dares instead of just questions, like ‘Go do blank to whoever’ or ‘Tell whoever a secret.’ Kept things interesting."

 

Uzi crossed her arms. "Sounds like a good way to start fights."

 

"Only if you’re a sore loser," Darren shot back. "Besides, the point isn’t to mess with others—it’s just fun seeing everyone get paranoid about what was asked."

 

N tilted his head. "So... we just guess what the question could have been?"

 

"Exactly," Darren said. "And if you’re really desperate to know, you can bribe other drones for answers. Not that it’ll work."

 

Uzi considered it for a moment, then shrugged. "Alright, I’m in."

 

Rebecca smirked. "Me too. This could be interesting."

 

One by one, everyone else agreed. Darren clapped his hands together. "Sweet. Now, who’s got something we can flip?"

Notes:

So, Ik in the show they can’t touch water or like, they’ll literally die cuz they’re robots, and the show makes a bunch of jokes abt it 😭🤚 But, in this AU, ig they’re js waterproof or som. Also it makes more sense that they’d have to be since they actually experience rain, since the planet isn’t apocalyptic yk?

Or at least that makes sense to me

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 14: Paranoia

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Thad immediately lifted his foot, slipping off his Croc and holding it up. "We don’t have a flip-flop, but this is close enough, right?"

 

Darren burst out laughing. "Dude, are we really about to use your Croc as fate’s ultimate decision-maker?"

 

Thad grinned. "Yeah. Unless you have a better idea."

 

Darren shrugged. "Nope, Croc it is."

 

With that settled, everyone shifted to sit in a loose circle on the floor. The thunder outside cracked loudly, making it feel as if the ground was rumbling. Emily flinched but quickly composed herself. "Okay, so who’s going first?"

 

Thad stretched out his legs and smirked. "You should, since you were the first one to ask."

 

Emily shot him a flat look. "That’s the dumbest reason I’ve ever heard."

 

Thad shrugged. "It makes sense.”

 

Emily let out an exasperated sigh. "Fine, whatever." She turned to her right, where Darren sat, and leaned in, cupping a hand around her mouth to whisper something. Darren listened, then smirked slightly before sitting back up.

 

Without hesitation, he looked across the circle and said, "Thad."

 

Thad’s eyes widened in shock. "Me? What? Why?!" He placed a hand on his chest as if Darren had just insulted his entire existence.

 

Darren burst out laughing. "Relax, dude, the question wasn’t even bad!"

 

Thad narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "That’s exactly what someone would say if the question was bad." He reached over and grabbed his Croc, holding it like it was some sacred artifact. "Only one way to find out."

 

Everyone watched as he tossed it into the air. It spun awkwardly before landing on the floor with the sole facing down.

 

There was a brief silence before Thad groaned dramatically, grabbing his head. "NOOO, COME ON. I NEED TO KNOW."

 

Darren smirked, leaning back on his hands. "Tough luck, dude. Guess you’ll never know."

 

Thad clasped his hands together in mock desperation. "Please. I’ll do anything."

 

Darren tapped his chin, pretending to consider. "Hmm... Nope."

 

Thad groaned again, flopping backward onto the carpet. "This game is so unfair."

 

Rebecca rolled her eyes. "That’s literally the point."

 

Still grumbling, Thad sat back up. Now it was Darren’s turn. He turned to his right, where Thad sat next to him, and leaned in to whisper his question.

 

Thad furrowed his brow, deep in thought, his fingers drumming against his knee as he considered his options. After a moment, he nodded to himself, decision made.

 

“Uzi,” he said.

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Should I be concerned?” she asked, tilting her head with an amused yet wary look.

 

Thad just smirked, leaning back on his hands. “I dunno, should you?”

 

Uzi crossed her arms, giving him a mock glare. “You better hope I don’t find out what the question was.”

 

Thad rolled his eyes. “Well, good luck with that, ‘cause you probably won’t.”

 

Uzi smirked. “Not if I can help it.” Without hesitation, she snatched the Croc from the middle of the circle and flipped it. It tumbled awkwardly before landing face up—though slightly tilted to the side.

 

Thad’s eyes widened. “Cheater! That was totally rigged.”

 

Uzi scoffed. “Oh, please.” She gestured to the Croc with both hands. “It’s clearly face up. You just don’t want me to know.”

 

Thad crossed his arms, still unconvinced. “It’s, like, kind of face up. It’s leaning.”

 

“Sounds like a ‘you’ problem.” Uzi grinned. “And guess what? That means I do get to know.” She gestured at Darren. “Alright, let’s hear it.”

 

Darren, barely holding back a laugh, finally revealed the question. “I asked, ‘Who in this group would be most likely to get into a fight with a wild animal and win?’”

 

Uzi blinked. Then slowly turned her gaze toward Thad. “That was it?” she deadpanned.

 

Thad burst out laughing. “I knew you’d react like that.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes. “Dude, you made it sound like some deep dark secret.”

 

“I mean,” Thad shrugged, “it is a pretty high honor. I just figured if anyone could take on a bear or something and walk away, it’d be you.”

 

Uzi smirked. “Damn right it would be.”

 

Rebecca sighed, shaking her head. “Can we all agree that no one here is fighting a bear?”

 

Emily raised a brow. “I mean… I could see Uzi taking on, like, a rabid raccoon or something.”

 

Uzi shrugged. “Sounds about right.”

 

They laughed for a moment before settling down. The game continued, the next turn about to begin.

 

Thad leaned toward Uzi, cupping his hand around his mouth to whisper.

 

“I dare you to stand outside in the rain for fifteen seconds,” he said, voice smug. “And you have to bring someone with you. Oh, and it can’t be me.”

 

Uzi recoiled slightly, narrowing her eyes. “Are you serious?” she muttered.

 

Thad grinned. “Yep.”

 

“No way.” She shook her head, crossing her arms. “Not happening.”

 

Thad sat back up, holding his hands up. “Hey, hey. Rules are rules. If the Croc says so, you have to.”

 

Uzi exhaled sharply, glaring at the Croc sitting in the center of the circle like it had personally wronged her. She hated how smug Thad sounded. Why did she have to bring someone else? If she was going to be miserable, she preferred to suffer alone.

 

Still, she had to pick someone. She glanced around the group, quickly eliminating options in her head. It would make her feel bad if she picked Emily. Rebecca? No way. She was literally hosting them at her house. And N—well, actually, she didn’t even want to consider that.

 

Her gaze landed on Darren. He met her eyes, instantly looking suspicious.

 

“…Darren,” she said reluctantly.

 

He narrowed his eyes. “Why do I feel like I should be concerned?”

 

“Don’t worry about it,” she muttered, feeling a little guilty for dragging him into this hypothetical misery. Not that it mattered, since she was determined for this question to remain hypothetical.

 

Thad smirked and grabbed the Croc, flipping it with little fanfare. It tumbled through the air and landed face down.

 

Uzi blinked. Then grinned.

 

“Yes!” she whispered, pumping her fist slightly in victory.

 

Thad groaned dramatically. “Lame! That would’ve been hilarious.”

 

Uzi shoved his shoulder playfully. “Oh, I’m so sorry for not waiting to do that.”

 

Thad shook his head. “You know it would’ve been funny.”

 

“Yeah, for you,” Uzi retorted.

 

Darren, still looking skeptical, leaned in slightly. “So… are you gonna tell me what the question was?”

 

Uzi smirked. “Nope.”

 

Darren exhaled through his nose, clearly debating whether to push for an answer. Eventually, he just sat back and crossed his arms, muttering something about how this game was stupid anyway.

 

Uzi chuckled before turning toward Rebecca, who sat beside her. It was her turn to ask a question. She leaned in, thinking for a moment before whispering her choice.

 

Uzi leaned slightly toward Rebecca, thinking for a moment before whispering, "Who is the biggest flirt in the group?"

 

Rebecca barely took a second to consider before answering, loud and clear, “Darren.”

 

Darren blinked, then scoffed. “Okay, seriously, what did I do?”

 

Rebecca laughed, giving him an exaggeratedly apologetic look. “Nothing! You’re just… a little obvious sometimes.”

 

“I am not!” Darren protested, looking around for support. No one jumped to his defense. “Wow. Okay. I see how it is.”

 

Rebecca, still grinning, picked up the Croc and flipped it effortlessly. It landed face down.

 

“Well, guess I don’t have to say it,” she said with a teasing shrug.

 

Darren narrowed his eyes. “What does that mean?”

 

Rebecca smiled innocently. “Nothing~

 

“Uh-huh. Sure.”

 

Rebecca giggles to herself “I’ll tell you later if you really wanna know.”

 

Darren exhaled, scoffing before he eventually just muttered, “Fine. Thanks, I guess.”

 

Thad, who had been watching with a grin, finally spoke up. “I dunno, man. That was way too nice. You should be worried.”

 

Darren rolled his eyes. “Oh, be quiet.

 

Rebecca giggled before turning her attention to the next drone in line. N.

 

She smirked. “Alright, N. Your turn.”

 

N visibly tensed as Rebecca leaned in to whisper the question. His expression shifted from anticipation to pure embarrassment within seconds, his face lighting up in a deep, unmistakable red.

 

Uzi immediately took note of this, her curiosity spiking. What did she even ask him?

 

Rebecca, watching his reaction, smirked. “Come on, N. You gotta answer.”

 

N hesitated, looking like he wanted nothing more than to disappear into the floor. He nervously scratched the back of his head, his gaze darting around the room before finally muttering, barely above a whisper, “…Uzi.”

 

Rebecca raised an eyebrow, genuinely surprised. “Oh? Interesting.”

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. “Okay, what was that?” she asked, turning to N.

 

N instantly looked away, waving his hands frantically. “It’s nothing! Don’t worry about it!” His voice cracked slightly, making it all the more unconvincing.

 

Uzi crossed her arms. “Yeah, sure. Super convincing. Totally not making me want to know more.”

 

Rebecca, still grinning, picked up the Croc and tossed it in the air. Everyone watched as it landed—face down.

 

“Aww, bummer,” Rebecca sighed dramatically. “I was really looking forward to that one.”

 

N let out a breath of relief, shoulders sagging. “Oh, thank goodness.”

 

Uzi, however, was left staring at the Croc, completely unsatisfied. She glanced back at N, still looking flustered, and her mind raced. What the hell did she ask him? And why did he look so embarrassed when he said my name?

 

She tried to brush it off, but the curiosity still gnawed at her. I’m so going to figure this out later.

 

N leaned toward Emily, cupping his hand around his mouth to whisper a question. Emily furrowed her brows, thinking for a moment before saying, “Rebecca.”

 

Rebecca’s eyes immediately flicked to her, intrigued. She didn’t say anything, but Uzi could tell she was itching to know what had just been asked. She sat back slightly, arms crossed, waiting for the outcome.

 

Emily picked up the Croc and flipped it. It spun in the air before landing face up.

 

Rebecca smirked. “Alright, spill. What was it?”

 

N smiled sheepishly. “It was a dare,” he admitted. “I dared Emily to give someone the most dramatic, over-the-top compliment she can think of.”

 

Rebecca blinked before laughing. “Wow. Terrifying.”

 

Emily turned to Rebecca, flipping her hair for effect. “Rebecca, you absolute queen. Your presence alone is like the sun breaking through storm clouds, a beacon of radiance and charm in this cold, dark world. Your fashion sense? Impeccable. Your wit? Razor-sharp. Your vibes? Immaculate.” She took Rebecca’s hands in hers, staring into her eyes dramatically. “Frankly, it is an honor to exist in the same room as you.”

 

The group burst out laughing.

 

Rebecca feigned wiping a nonexistent tear from her eye. “That was… beautiful.”

 

Emily placed a hand on her chest. “I meant every word.”

 

Rebecca rolled her eyes but grinned. “Alright, alright. Dare complete.”

 

With that, Emily and Rebecca sat back down, still chuckling, as the game continued.

 

-

 

The rest of the game was filled with laughter, playful accusations, and dramatic reactions. Some dares had the group howling with laughter, while others made them squirm in secondhand embarrassment. The paranoia of not knowing the questions only added to the fun, and even though no one took it too seriously, there was still that slight edge of curiosity lingering in the air. The occasional thunder outside would shake the house, momentarily startling some of them, but it only added to the atmosphere.

 

After a while, the excitement started to fade, and one by one, they all grew tired of the game. Emily checked the time on her phone, stretching her arms over her head before suggesting they should all get some sleep and wait for the rain to let up before heading home. Rebecca agreed, saying that was probably the best idea. She stood up, using her phone flashlight to guide her through the dark room. “I’ll be right back. Going to grab some blankets and pillows for everyone.” With that, she disappeared through the doorway.

 

Thad wasted no time claiming his spot, immediately flopping onto the couch with a satisfied sigh. “Dibs on this spot,” he announced, kicking his feet up dramatically.

 

The others followed suit. Emily dropped down onto the floor in front of the couch, leaning against it as she got comfortable. N settled on the other end of the couch, sitting cross-legged for the time being, while Darren found a spot nearby, stretching out his legs.

 

Uzi opted for the floor. It just felt right—something about lying on a carpeted surface with the distant sound of rain tapping against the house was oddly comfortable. She stretched her arms behind her head, letting her mind wander.

 

Tonight had been fun. Really fun. She couldn’t even remember the last time she had laughed so much. She never really thought of herself as someone who would enjoy hanging out in a big group, but now, she was already thinking about how exciting it would be to do it again. The idea of having friends—actual friends—to spend time with, to joke around with, and to experience nights like this with… it felt nice. And as she lay there, listening to the rain and the quiet shuffling of her friends getting comfortable, she couldn’t help but feel genuinely happy.

 

For once, she was looking forward to what the future had in store.

 

Notes:

I wonder what Rebecca said to N 🤔

Maybe we’ll find out eventually…? Who knows?

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 15: Inquiry

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

It had probably been about twenty minutes since Rebecca had brought the blankets and pillows. Everyone else seemed to have dozed off, but Uzi was still awake, lying on her side and staring at nothing in particular. She had always had trouble sleeping—her mind never wanted to shut up long enough to let her rest, and it was beyond frustrating. Right now, she was exhausted, her body practically begging for sleep, but no matter how much she tried, it just wasn’t happening.

 

The worst part? She was freezing.

 

When the power had gone out, so had the AC, which meant the house had gotten unbearably cold. The rain outside wasn’t helping, and the occasional gusts of wind against the windows made it even worse. She had bundled herself up as much as she could in her blanket, but it wasn’t enough. A shiver ran through her, her body tensing in response, and she let out a quiet sigh, trying to pull the blanket tighter around herself. Her teeth chattered, her fingers cold against her arms. At this rate, she doubted she’d get any sleep at all. She was just starting to accept that when—

 

“Uzi?”

 

A soft voice broke through the silence.

 

She blinked, turning slightly at the sound. It was N. He was on the couch just behind her, close enough that his voice didn’t carry too far in the dark room. His voice was barely above a whisper, like he wasn’t sure if she was actually awake or not.

 

“…Are you awake?”

 

Uzi hesitated before rolling onto her back, still shivering. “No, I’m asleep,” she muttered sarcastically, her words coming out choppy from the way her teeth chattered.

 

Even in the dim lighting, she could see him tilt his head slightly, concerned. “Are you cold?” he asked, though it was obvious from the way she was shivering that the answer was yes.

 

Uzi shot him a look. “What do you think?” she deadpanned, voice still shaking from the cold.

 

N paused for a moment, then sat up slightly. “Do you… want my jacket?” he offered. “I’m not that cold, and you could probably use it more than me.”

 

Uzi blinked at him, surprised by the offer. She wasn’t exactly the type to accept help easily, but right now? She wasn’t about to be stubborn. “…Yeah. That’d be great, actually.”

 

N didn’t hesitate—he shrugged off his jacket and leaned over, handing it to her. She took it quickly, mumbling, “Thanks,” before slipping it on. The warmth from his body heat still lingered in the fabric, and she instinctively pulled it tighter around herself. It was way warmer than the blanket alone, and for the first time that night, she actually felt comfortable.

 

N settled back into his spot on the couch, adjusting his blanket around himself. There was a brief silence before he spoke again,“Goodnight, Uzi.”

 

Uzi shifted slightly, the warmth of the jacket already making her eyelids feel heavier.“Night, N.”

 

She lay there for a moment, feeling more at ease than before. It was… nice, in a way. She wasn’t used to others looking out for her like that. The thought made her stomach feel weird—she wasn’t sure why. But, she didn’t have the energy to dwell on it too much.

 

Instead, she let herself relax, the warmth lulling her into sleep at last.

 

-

 

A sudden brightness pierced through Uzi’s closed eyes, dragging her out of sleep. She groaned, immediately throwing an arm over her face in protest. The lights were back on, and after spending so long in the dark, it felt like she was staring directly into the sun. Blinking a few times, she slowly uncovered her eyes, waiting for them to adjust.

 

When her vision cleared, she glanced toward the window. The sky was still a deep, inky black, but the rain had finally calmed to a soft drizzle, barely audible against the glass. The worst of the storm had passed.

 

Somewhere across the room, Thad let out a tired groan. “Ugh… What time is it?” His voice was heavy with sleep.

 

Uzi instinctively reached for her phone, her eyes still feeling sluggish as she powered it on. When the time popped up on the screen, her stomach dropped.

 

1:17 AM

 

Oh, crap.

 

She had told her dad she’d be out late, but not this late. He was probably asleep by now, but that didn’t make her feel any less anxious about it. She hadn’t meant to stay out this long—how had time passed so quickly?

 

Before she could say anything, Emily’s voice cut through the quiet. “It’s 1:17,” she answered, her voice a little groggy.

 

Uzi hesitated, locking her phone again as she tried to push down the rising panic. What was she supposed to do now? It wasn’t like she could just walk home at this hour—she had no way to get there on her own. Taking the bus obviously wasn’t an option, and calling her dad? Yeah, right. She’d rather die than deal with that conversation.

 

That only left one real choice.

 

She sighed, sitting up slightly and stretching her arms over her head before pushing herself up onto her feet. She felt weirdly awkward about it, but there wasn’t really another option—she had to ask N.

 

Glancing around, she spotted him still on the couch, sitting up as he seemed to idly scrolled through his phone for a moment. He was probably checking the time, too.

 

As he went to put his phone away, he lifted his head and immediately noticed Uzi walking toward him.

 

Uzi tugged at the sleeves of the oversized jacket she was wearing—his jacket—as she hesitated for a moment before speaking. She felt awkward even asking, but what choice did she have?

 

"Hey, uh..." she started, her voice quieter than usual. "Would you mind driving me home?"

 

She tried to sound casual, but the guilt was obvious in her tone. She hated having to ask him for a favor like this, especially in the middle of the night. He had already been nice enough to give her his jacket—now she was making him go out of his way even more.

 

She braced herself for some kind of protest. Not that she thought he’d say no, but she expected at least some hesitation. Maybe a tired sigh or a ‘You sure you can't just stay?’ Something.

 

Instead, N barely even blinked before nodding. "Yeah, of course!" His tone was as easygoing as ever, completely unbothered.

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard by how quickly he agreed. "Wait, really?”

 

He smiled at her, standing up and stretching before beginning to fold  his blanket neatly on the couch. "Yeah! I don’t mind."

 

That… made sense, actually. N had been nothing but nice since she’s met him—of course he wouldn’t have a problem with this. Still, Uzi had kind of expected some pushback. She didn't dwell on it too much, though.

 

As he started toward the door, he glanced back at her. "C'mon."

 

She hadn’t expected to leave this second, but at least they were able to. It was better than sitting around stressing about it.

 

Wanting to be at least a little polite, she turned to fix her blanket, making sure it wasn’t just sprawled messily on the floor. She wasn’t exactly an expert in folding blankets, but she did her best before quickly hurrying after N.

 

The media room was still dark, and as she made her way toward the door, she nearly tripped over her own feet. Catching herself, she huffed in annoyance before pulling out her phone, switching on the flashlight to guide her way.

 

The soft glow illuminated the stairs as she followed N down, the house eerily quiet except for the faint sound of soft rain still pattering against the windows.

 

When they reached the front door, N pulled it open and stepped aside, holding it for her without a second thought. The cool night air rushed in, carrying the scent of damp pavement and rain-soaked grass.

 

Uzi glanced at him and gave a small nod of thanks. "Appreciate it," she said, her voice casual, though she was still slightly groggy from sleep.

 

N just smiled. "No problem."

 

She stepped outside, immediately feeling the light drizzle against her face. It was barely raining now—more of a mist than actual raindrops—but the air was still damp and cool. With a quiet sigh, she pulled the hood of her hoodie over her head.

 

Behind her, she heard the soft click of the front door shutting as N followed. The driveway glistened under the streetlights, rainwater pooling in small dips along the pavement. Their footsteps were quiet against the wet ground, the world around them eerily still. The storm had left the neighborhood in a hushed calm, the only sounds being the distant hum of crickets and the occasional drip of water falling from the roof.

 

As she reached the car, Uzi grabbed the handle and pulled open the passenger door, slipping inside. The interior was cold as the chill from outside followed her. She exhaled softly, watching as N got in on the other side, shaking a few stray droplets from his hair before pulling the door shut.

 

The soft chime of the car starting filled the quiet as he pressed the ignition. The dashboard lights flickered to life, casting a faint glow over the dark interior. The rain-speckled windshield reflected the occasional flash of lightning in the distance, but the worst of the storm had passed.

 

Without a word, N shifted into drive, and they pulled away from the house, the tires rolling over the slick pavement. The glow of streetlights passed over them in intervals, stretching their shadows across the dashboard.

 

The night stretched ahead, quiet and open, as they drove through the empty streets.

 

Uzi’s eyelids felt impossibly heavy. The hum of the car engine and the rhythmic patter of rain against the windshield made it all the more tempting to just let herself drift off. She thought about grabbing her phone, maybe putting on some music to keep herself awake, but even that felt like too much effort.

 

Her drowsy thoughts were interrupted when N spoke up. “Hey, uh—what’s your address?”

 

She blinked, forcing herself to focus as he handed her his phone. The screen glowed softly in the dim car, illuminating his slightly outstretched hand.

 

Wordlessly, she took it, quickly typing in her address before handing it back. “Here,” she mumbled, suppressing a yawn.

 

N glanced at the GPS for a second before nodding. “Thanks.”

 

“No problem,” she replied, her voice quiet as she rested her head against the window, watching the blur of streetlights and darkened houses pass by. She wasn’t thinking about much—just letting her brain float in the space between awake and asleep—when, out of nowhere, a thought surfaced.

 

Rebecca’s question.

 

Uzi’s eyes opened a little more, her mind suddenly a lot more awake. She had completely forgotten about it until now, but the moment she remembered N’s embarrassed reaction, her curiosity kicked in full force.

 

She turned her head slightly toward him. “Hey,” she started, her voice cutting through the soft hum of the car. “Back during paranoia—what did Rebecca ask you?”

 

N stiffened just slightly, his grip on the wheel adjusting. He didn’t answer right away.

 

Uzi raised an eyebrow. “...What?”

 

He let out a small, nervous chuckle, avoiding her gaze. “Uh—nothing. It was nothing.”

 

That wasn’t convincing in the slightest.

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes at him, sitting up a little more. “Oh, come on. You can tell me. It’s just us, no one else is here to listen.” She leaned in slightly, watching him carefully. “What, was it that bad?”

 

N’s face heated up as he shook his head quickly. “No! No, it wasn’t bad, it was just—” He hesitated, gripping the wheel a little tighter. “I-It’s not important.”

 

Uzi smirked, now really curious. “Oh, this is weird,” she teased. “I’ve never seen you get this flustered before. That just makes me wanna know even more.”

 

N let out a groan, visibly shrinking in his seat. “Uzi…”

 

She grinned. “N…”

 

His expression was a mixture of amusement and panic, and Uzi was loving this. Whatever Rebecca had asked, it was clearly something that got to him.

 

She leaned back against her seat, crossing her arms. “C’mon, just tell me,” she prodded, her smirk widening. “I will find out one way or another.”

 

N groaned again, running a hand down his face, still avoiding looking at her. Uzi waited expectantly, eyes gleaming with intrigue.

 

N opened his mouth like he was about to say something—then quickly shut it again, his fingers tapping anxiously on the steering wheel. He seemed to be struggling to get the words out, and Uzi could practically see the gears turning in his head.

 

Finally, after a few seconds of hesitation, he let out a nervous breath. “I, uh—I promise I’ll tell you another time,” he mumbled, still not looking at her. “It’s just… late, and this probably isn’t the best time for it.” His voice wasn’t irritated or dismissive—just awkward and still obviously flustered.

 

Uzi tilted her head slightly, watching him with amusement. “Huh.” She hummed in consideration before shrugging. “Alright, I’ll hold you to that, then. You did promise, so now you have to tell me.”

 

N let out a stiff, awkward laugh, gripping the wheel a little tighter. “Y-Yeah… I guess I did.”

 

Uzi smirked, shaking her head as she leaned back into her seat. “Man, you’re acting real suspicious right now,” she teased, raising an eyebrow at him.

 

N chuckled under his breath, but it was nervous, and he very obviously kept his eyes locked on the road, resisting the urge to look her way.

 

Uzi could tell he probably felt bad for not telling her—because that was just the kind of drone he was—but she didn’t push him. She knew he’d keep his word.

 

With a quiet scoff, she watched him for a second longer before turning back to the window, watching the blurred shapes of buildings and streetlights pass by. Her thoughts lingered on the whole thing for a little longer, trying to piece together what kind of question could have possibly made N react that way.

 

But before she could think too much about it, sleep began to pull her under. The warmth of the car, the steady hum of the engine, the faint sound of rain tapping against the windshield—it was too much to fight against.

 

Her eyelids grew heavy again, and this time, she didn’t resist. Within moments, she was fast asleep.

Notes:

AHHH I LOVE THIS CHAPTER

Also this is like the end of this whole little “arc” or wtv, if you’ve been reading my authors notes, I think I said (a few chapters ago) that the story is composed of a bunch of arcs, if that makes sense. So like this previous part of the group hanging out was basically establishing the friend group, character dynamics, the characters themselves and their personalities, js character building/development overall and etc. And also all of it is like, super positive and nothing bad is really happening, js super wholesome. But just you wait 😈 *dun dun dun*

LMAO ok anyways, a few more notes. There’s a few details I left out, wasn’t necessarily on purpose, I js feel like if I detailed it it’d be dragging this chapter out too much yk. For one - if you’re observant, u might be like “what happened to Uzi’s and N’s clothes?” Cuz like they got soaked by the rain and they changed. I’m assuming they js left them by the front door and grabbed them on the way out.

Then there’s the stuffed cat that N gave Uzi. I didn’t mention it cuz I didn’t see a reason to, Uzi probably js left it in the passenger seat and grabbed it again when she got in the car.

Then there’s what was N wearing under the hoodie? I’m gonna assume he was wearing either some sort of tank top or like a tshirt. Rebecca probably has like, an older brother or som, so that’s where she got N’s clothes. Or like, she js had a comfy pair of baggy sweatpants and an oversized hoodie that she wears as pajamas idk. This is js like, overall super detailed stuff that’s not too relevant to mention

I think that’s all I had to say? I’ll see yall in the next chapter! 🫶

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 16: Assembly

Summary:

This is a time skip of about 2 days - it’s Tuesday now. (The last chapter and previous parts took place on a Saturday, going into Sunday.)

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi absentmindedly tapped her pencil against her notebook, barely paying attention as the teacher rambled on about something she wasn’t remotely interested in. Her mind kept drifting—mostly to lunch.

 

She’d realized recently just how much she looked forward to it now. It was nice having drones to sit with, drones she was actually getting to know. It was a weird adjustment, sure—she wasn’t used to this whole “friend group” thing—but she had to admit, she liked it.

 

She was pulled from her thoughts when she suddenly heard her name—sharp, cutting through the haze of her zoning out.

 

“Uzi,” the teacher called, his tone laced with irritation. “If you’d kindly start paying attention instead of daydreaming, that’d be great.”

 

Uzi snapped her head up, quickly straightening in her seat. “Oh—uh, sorry,” she muttered, forcing herself to refocus as the teacher shot her a brief, unimpressed look before continuing his lecture.

 

She sighed quietly, gripping her pencil tighter as she started taking notes again. Seriously, it wasn’t her fault class was so boring.

 

A few minutes later, the teacher finally shut his book with a dull thud, glancing around the room. “Alright,” he started, sounding just as uninterested as he did when lecturing. “Before lunch, the whole school is going to meet in the gym for an assembly.”

 

Mild chatter rose across the classroom at that, some students exchanging confused glances.

 

The teacher sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Look, just pay attention when you’re there. It’s important.” His tone was serious now, though still carrying a hint of boredom.

 

A student in the back raised their hand. “Is it a pep rally or something?” they asked, sounding genuinely confused. “We didn’t hear anything about this.”

 

The teacher shook his head. “No, it’s not a pep rally,” he said, then hesitated for a second before adding, “And I’m not allowed to talk about it right now.”

 

That sent a ripple of unease through the room.

 

Uzi furrowed her brow, gripping her pencil a little tighter. Not allowed to talk about it? What the hell did that mean?

 

Now she was curious. And, honestly? A little unsettled.

 

What could possibly be serious enough that the entire school had to meet in the gym without warning?

 

Something about this didn’t sit right with her. She had a bad feeling.

 

-

 

The uneasy feeling in Uzi’s gut didn’t go away. If anything, it only got worse as the next two class periods dragged on.

 

She wasn’t the only one feeling that way, either. The whole school was buzzing with speculation, students whispering between classes, tossing out theories about what this mysterious assembly could be about.

 

Some thought the principal was resigning—maybe something dramatic had happened behind the scenes. Others believed it had to do with a teacher getting fired, or some kind of scandal involving the staff. There were even wilder rumors floating around, like a fight so bad that police had to be called, or that someone got caught cheating on a major exam and was about to be made an example of.

 

But the one thing most people seemed to agree on? It had to be about the staff—because what could possibly be so serious about a student or group of students that the entire school needed to assemble?

 

That thought stuck with Uzi the most.

 

By the time the bell rang, signaling the transition to the assembly, she was on edge. The halls were packed, bodies pressing against her from all directions as everyone funneled toward the gym. She gritted her teeth, trying to navigate through the sea of students without losing her patience.

 

Her mind raced as she walked. What if something happened to a student? The school would have to acknowledge it if something serious went down, right? But then, wouldn’t they have just sent a message home? Why all this secrecy?

 

She didn’t like this. At all.

 

The pit in her stomach grew heavier as she neared the gym doors, pushing forward through the crowd. Something wasn’t right.

 

And she had a feeling she wasn’t going to like whatever they were about to hear.

 

As Uzi weaved through the crowd, trying not to get shoved around too much, her eyes landed on a familiar face just ahead—Darren. He was walking alongside Rebecca, their hands intertwined as they moved through the swarm of students. They stayed close, leaning toward each other slightly, as if the sheer mass of people made them instinctively stick together.

 

Uzi hesitated for only a second before pushing forward, squeezing between students until she reached them. She tapped Darren on the shoulder, causing him to turn around with a raised brow. His usual laid-back demeanor was still there, but there was something else in his expression too—mild unease.

 

“Hey,” Uzi said, glancing between him and Rebecca. “Do you have any clue what’s going on?”

 

Darren exhaled sharply, shaking his head. “Not a clue. But I don’t like it. It’s freaking me out.” His tone wasn’t panicked, but there was an edge to it, like he was actively trying not to think too much about it.

 

Rebecca turned her head slightly, giving Uzi a small smile. “Oh, hey, Uzi,” she greeted, her voice lighter despite the tension surrounding them. “We were just about to go find the others—N, Thad, and Emily. You wanna come with?”

 

Uzi didn’t even need to think about it. “Yeah, of course.”

 

She fell into step beside them, her arms crossed as she kept her gaze ahead. The noise of the crowded hallway felt even louder now, students chattering all around them, everyone equally confused. But despite the chaos, sticking with Darren and Rebecca made her feel slightly less tense.

 

Still, that uneasy feeling wouldn’t go away. If anything, it only grew.

 

As they finally pushed their way into the gym, the noise of a few hundred students all talking at once filled the air. Uzi scanned the room, looking through the crowd until she spotted two familiar figures—Thad and Emily—standing off to the side near the bleachers.

 

“Hey, there they are,” Rebecca said, nudging Darren lightly before the three of them made their way over.

 

Thad looked perfectly at ease, arms crossed as he glanced around the room with mild curiosity. Emily, on the other hand, had her arms tucked tightly around herself, her expression tense.

 

“So what do you guys think this is about?” Uzi asked as they approached.

 

Emily frowned. “I have no idea, but I don’t like it. Something about this feels… off.”

 

Thad, on the other hand, shrugged. “C’mon, it’s probably something dumb. Maybe the principal got tired of people using AI to write their essays and decided to call a school-wide intervention,” he joked.

 

Emily shot him a sharp look. “Thad, this is serious.”

 

Thad held up his hands. “Okay, okay, but—” He gestured around them. “Look at everyone. The whole school is freaking out, and for what? I bet we’re all stressing for no reason, and this is just gonna turn out to be something really stupid.”

 

Emily rolled her eyes but didn’t argue further.

 

They continued talking for another minute, throwing out theories and trying to make sense of everything, when Darren suddenly glanced around and frowned. “Wait… where’s N?”

 

The group fell silent for a second before Thad piped up. “Oh, he’s over there.” He pointed toward a section of the bleachers near the back. “Sitting with J and V.”

 

At the mention of that name, Uzi instinctively turned her head in the direction Thad was pointing.

 

There, sitting near the top of the bleachers, was N—situated between V and another girl she could only assume was J. V was slouched lazily beside him, looking incredibly uninterested in whatever was happening, while J sat upright, her sharp eyes scanning the room like she was evaluating everything.

 

J was similar in stature to V. She had silver hair tied up into pigtails by dainty black ribbons, her sharp yellow eyes a stark contrast to her hair. Her expression was nothing short of smug, a knowing smirk tugging at the corner of her mouth as she leaned slightly toward N, speaking in a way that made it seem like she was making some kind of comment about the situation—or maybe even about him.

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed.

 

She hadn’t met J yet, but Thad had mentioned her before—how she was not a great drone and how she encouraged V to pick on N. And looking at her now, Uzi could already tell she wasn’t going to like her. Something about the way she carried herself, the way she seemed so comfortable with making N sit with them, immediately put Uzi on edge.

 

Her stomach twisted slightly as she thought about what kind of things J had probably said to N before. She wasn’t sure what exactly J’s deal was, but if she was anything like V, then Uzi already knew she wasn’t someone she wanted to be around.

 

She glanced back at the rest of the group, forcing herself to shake off her irritation. Whatever this assembly was about, that was the real issue here. But still… she couldn’t ignore the way N looked like he was just enduring sitting there, and that bothered her more than she wanted to admit.

 

Rebecca glanced around at the crowd slowly filling up the gym and gestured toward the bleachers. “We should probably find seats before they’re all taken.”

 

Everyone nodded in agreement, and they started making their way toward the seating area. They climbed up to the lower-middle section, settling into place. From here, Uzi had a good view of the gym floor and everything set up in the center.

 

As she sat down, her eyes instinctively flickered toward N. He was sitting toward the bottom-left row, not too far from her, with V and J still beside him. He wasn’t talking much, just idly glancing around as if lost in thought while J whispered something to V, who chuckled in response. Uzi wasn’t sure if she was imagining it, but N looked slightly uncomfortable.

 

Shaking the thought away, she turned her attention to the center of the gym. A microphone stood in the middle of the polished floor, its stand adjusted and ready for whoever would be speaking. Behind it, slightly off to the side, was a large screen connected to a projector mounted on a cart. The projector was off for now, its blank screen giving away nothing about what they were about to see.

 

Uzi furrowed her brow. The setup felt… ominous. What kind of announcement required a full visual presentation? The whole thing seemed big—bigger than just a simple policy change or some new school rule. She drummed her fingers against her knee absentmindedly, trying to piece together what could possibly be serious enough to require the entire school to be here for it.

 

Then, the room slowly started to quiet down. The noise of hundreds of students talking at once dimmed into murmurs before settling into silence.

 

Uzi glanced toward the front of the gym and immediately understood why.

 

The principal was walking toward the microphone, his expression unreadable, his posture rigid. He wasn’t carrying any papers or notes, which meant whatever he was about to say, he either had memorized or was speaking from experience.

 

A weird, uneasy feeling settled in Uzi’s stomach.

 

This isn’t going to be good.

 

The principal stepped up to the microphone, clearing his throat before speaking. “I’m sure many of you are wondering why we’ve gathered you all here today.”

 

Uzi barely held back an eye roll. Gee, you think? That’s literally all anyone had been talking about all morning. The way he said it, like he was revealing some grand mystery, only made her more impatient. If this turned out to be something dumb, she was going to be so  annoyed.

 

Before she could dwell on it further, the lights dimmed slightly, and a faint hum filled the air as the projector flickered to life. A large image appeared on the screen— a student. Just a normal-looking guy. He had short, slightly messy hair, a neutral expression, and wore a typical school hoodie. There was nothing particularly remarkable about him, nothing that screamed this is an important person you should know about.

 

The principal gestured to the screen. “Does anyone recognize this student?”

 

A few people in the crowd nodded, murmuring among themselves, but most remained silent.

 

Uzi frowned slightly before leaning toward Thad, who was sitting beside her. Keeping her voice low, she asked, “Do you know who that is?”

 

Thad barely spared the screen a glance before shrugging. “Nope. And honestly? I still think this whole thing is stupid.” He crossed his arms, slouching slightly in his seat. “They’re making a big deal out of nothing.”

 

Uzi raised an eyebrow. Thad looked utterly unimpressed, like he was already mentally checked out of whatever this was supposed to be. Maybe he was right, and this was just another overblown school announcement—but something about the principal’s serious tone and the way the room had gone so quiet made her doubt it.

 

The principal continued, his voice calm but carrying an unmistakable weight. “Some of you may have noticed that he hasn’t been in school so far this week.” He let that sentence linger in the air for a moment, as if giving students time to process it.

 

Uzi exhaled sharply, resisting the urge to tap her fingers against her leg in impatience. Okay, great, but why does that matter? Every second of dragging this out only made the whole thing more frustrating. Why couldn’t he just say what happened instead of dancing around it?

 

Then, without warning, the screen shut off, leaving only the dim lighting of the gym. The principal’s posture straightened, his expression shifting from serious to downright uncomfortable. His hands rested tensely on the podium as he took a breath before continuing.

 

“I regret to inform you all that this student…” he paused, glancing over the room as if bracing for the reaction. “…passed away this past weekend.”

Notes:

FINALLYYYY posted. I’m gonna try to post another one today too, if I don’t, then something happened 😭

Omg also, I js realized that like the dates I post chapters don’t automatically update, or at least I don’t think they do. I posted this initial story on February 19th, and the date has not changed. So from now on I’m gonna do that 💀 it’s March 15th rn btw, also coincidentally the same day covid started omg 😭 “yall have 3 weeks of school off but that’s it 🤓☝️” ended up turning into a year and a half 😭

ANYWAYSSS ik this chapter wasn’t that good, or at least personally I don’t think it was, but js BARE WITH ME I promised it’s gonna get better :,)

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 17: Melancholy

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The moment the words left his mouth, the gym erupted into hushed whispers. A ripple of reactions spread through the students—some gasped, their faces twisting in shock, while others exchanged uncertain glances. A few looked completely indifferent, as if this news barely registered as important to them.

 

Uzi’s mind reeled. What?! This wasn’t at all what she expected. He died? Her stomach twisted as her thoughts raced. What could’ve happened? Was it an accident? Something worse? This was serious—horrible, even.

 

She glanced at her friends. Rebecca had a hand over her mouth, brows furrowed in concern. Darren and Emily were exchanging a tense glance. Thad, despite his earlier indifference, looked a little less smug now, though he still didn’t say anything.

 

Uzi’s eyes flicked back to the principal. He looked grim, like even he didn’t want to be the one delivering this news. The atmosphere in the gym had completely shifted, and Uzi couldn’t shake the feeling that whatever came next was only going to make this worse.

 

The principal cleared his throat, his fingers briefly adjusting his tie in a nervous tic before he spoke again. His voice, though steady, carried a noticeable strain.

 

“I’m going to be incredibly blunt with you all.” His eyes scanned the room, making brief contact with different students before settling back on the microphone. “This student didn’t just pass, but he was murdered.”

 

A sharp, collective inhale rippled through the gym. The whispers from before turned into something quieter, heavier.

 

The principal continued, his voice more deliberate now. “I was informed by the police that I had to make this announcement today. We didn’t say anything yesterday because, frankly, we weren’t sure if we could. The details of the situation are…” He hesitated for the briefest moment, exhaling sharply. “…graphic.”

 

Uzi barely processed the next few seconds. Murdered? Her mind latched onto the word like a vice, repeating it over and over again. This wasn’t just some freak accident or medical emergency—this was a murder. A crime. Something deliberate. Someone had done this.

 

The principal went on, his expression unreadable, though his grip on the podium had tightened. “The student was staying after school for reasons unknown when they were attacked. At first, authorities believed it was an animal attack due to the, um…” He swallowed. “…nature of the scene. However, finger prints as well as other evidence were found —not belonging to the student, but belonging to an unknown individual.”

 

The silence that followed was suffocating.

 

Uzi’s stomach twisted uncomfortably. This wasn’t some horrific accident or the doings of a wild animal slipping into the building. There were only two possibilities for who could’ve done this: an intruder… or another student.

 

The room felt impossibly still. Even the students who had looked indifferent before were now sitting tensely, as if the weight of the revelation had finally settled in.

 

Then, after what felt like forever, the projector screen flickered back on, cutting through the silence. A new slide appeared—a phone number, bold and clear against a blank background.

 

“If anyone has any information,” the principal said, his tone firm yet pleading, “please contact this number or the police directly.”

 

Uzi barely registered the words. She was still stuck on that single, horrifying thought.

 

There’s a murderer in this school.

 

The principal paused, giving everyone a moment to absorb the weight of what had just been said. A few students hesitantly pulled out their phones, snapping pictures of the number displayed on the screen. The quiet hum of notifications and camera shutters filled the otherwise silent gym, but it was overshadowed by the heavy atmosphere that hung over the crowd like a storm cloud.

 

Uzi’s thoughts swirled. This felt unreal. A student had been murdered—not in some far-off city, not in a late-night alley, but here. In their school. A place that was supposed to be safe. The reality of it all settled uncomfortably in her chest.

 

Her gaze shifted to the drones sitting beside her.

 

Thad, for once, wasn’t making some offhand joke or dismissing the situation as dumb. He was staring straight ahead, his usual smug confidence wiped away. His brows were slightly furrowed, lips pressed together in a tight line, fingers idly tapping against his knee as if trying to process everything.

 

Emily looked far worse. Her hand covered her mouth, eyes wide with a sort of horror Uzi had never seen in her before. Her shoulders were tense, her whole posture rigid like she was frozen in place. She didn’t say anything—she just stared at the screen, like she was waiting for the principal to say, Just kidding! This was all just a social experiment! But no such words came.

 

Rebecca and Darren sat huddled together, Darren’s arm wrapped protectively around her shoulders. Rebecca had leaned into him, gripping his sleeve tightly, her expression twisted with unease. Darren, normally so laid-back, had a deep frown on his face, his usual carefree energy completely gone.

 

Uzi swallowed hard, tearing her eyes away from them and letting her gaze wander across the rest of the gym.

 

The room was a mess of reactions. Some students sat completely frozen, staring in shock at the screen or the principal as if waiting for more details, some kind of explanation. Others weren’t as composed—she caught sight of a few students crying, covering their faces as their friends tried to console them. Then there were the ones who still tried to act indifferent, leaning back in their seats with crossed arms, pretending not to care—but the tension in their bodies, the occasional darting glances at each other, gave them away.

 

Then her eyes landed on N.

 

He was still sitting on one of the lower rows, his entire body wound tight with tension. His arms were wrapped around himself, fingers gripping his sleeves. She watched as his thumb rubbed small, repetitive circles into his arm—self-soothing, like he was trying to hold himself together.

 

Next to him, J and V were whispering to each other, their voices too low to hear over the murmurs in the gym. They weren’t whispering like they were gossiping or joking about something—no, their expressions were serious, their postures stiff. They were obviously discussing something important. But as much as they seemed invested in their conversation, they weren’t paying attention to N

 

They didn’t look at him, didn’t say a word to him. It was like he wasn’t even there.

 

Uzi felt something simmer in her chest—frustration, maybe even anger. Why weren’t they comforting him? N clearly wasn’t okay. His supposed closest friends were right there, and yet they were too wrapped up in their own conversation to even acknowledge him.

 

That wasn’t fair.

 

She clenched her jaw, turning her attention back to the principal. There was still more to hear, more to process. But even as she tried to focus, a part of her still lingered on N.

 

The principal cleared his throat, his gaze sweeping over the sea of students before him. His voice, though steady, carried an unmistakable weight.

 

"I know this is a lot to take in," he began, his usual composed tone laced with something more somber. "I want to thank you all for being here today and for listening. I understand that this news is shocking, and for some of you, it may even be difficult to process."

 

He paused, exhaling slightly before continuing. "The school will have counselors available for anyone who needs to talk. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, please don’t hesitate to reach out—to a teacher, a friend, a staff member. No one should have to go through this alone."

 

His eyes briefly scanned the students again, as if assessing the overall atmosphere in the room. Then, with a small nod, he concluded, "That being said, you are all dismissed. You may head to lunch now."

 

A heavy silence settled over the gym for a few seconds—no one moved right away. Then, slowly, the crowd began to stir. Chairs scraped against the floor, murmurs and hushed conversations started up again as students hesitantly began to make their way toward the exits. The once-packed bleachers shifted as people stood, some moving sluggishly, still processing everything, while others whispered to their friends, their voices filled with urgency and confusion.

 

-

 

The group sat at their usual spot in the cafeteria, their trays mostly untouched as they processed everything they had just heard. The usual chatter of lunchtime felt subdued, the weight of the assembly still hanging in the air.

 

Darren was the first to speak. “So… that was insane.” His voice was quiet, thoughtful. “I mean, a murder? At school?” He shook his head, pushing his food around on his tray with his fork. “I don’t even know what to think.”

 

Rebecca sighed, leaning on her hand. “I don’t either. I keep trying to come up with some kind of explanation, but nothing makes sense. How does something like that even happen?”

 

Thad, who had been uncharacteristically quiet up until now, scoffed. “I still don’t get why they waited until today to tell us. Like, why not yesterday?” He crossed his arms. “The fact that they had to ‘check if they were even allowed’ makes it sound even worse.”

 

Emily frowned. “That’s because it is worse. I don’t know how anyone’s supposed to just… carry on like normal after hearing that.” She glanced around the cafeteria. “Look at everyone. Half the people in here aren’t even eating. It’s like the entire school is on edge.”

 

Uzi wasn’t really listening to the rest of the conversation at this point. She was lost in her own thoughts, absently picking at the corner of her tray.

 

Out of all the schools she had gone to, never had something like this happened. Sure, she had transferred to places where drama happened, fights broke out, and there was the occasional school lockdown for some minor incident. But this? A murder? And not just anywhere—inside the school itself? That was a whole different level of terrifying.

 

Her thoughts were interrupted by a sudden realization.

 

N.

 

She glanced around their table. He wasn’t here.

 

She thought back to when they had left the gym—she hadn’t really been paying attention to where he had gone, but now that she was thinking about it, he must have gone with J and V instead of coming with the rest of them.

 

Her mind lingered on the memory of him sitting in the bleachers, tense, withdrawn, while J and V whispered to each other, barely even acknowledging him. The way he had hugged himself, how his body language practically screamed discomfort.

 

She frowned.

 

After debating for a moment, she spoke up. “Hey,” she said, glancing at the others, “does anyone wanna come with me to check on N? See if he wants to sit with us?”

 

Rebecca raised a brow. “You don’t think he’d rather stay with J and V?”

 

Uzi shrugged. “Maybe. But I still wanna check.”

 

There was a brief pause before Emily perked up. “I’ll go!” she said, pushing her tray aside. “Honestly, I was kinda wondering about him too.”

 

Uzi nodded, relieved that she didn’t have to go by herself. She didn’t know why, but something about walking up to N alone while he was with them felt… weird. Like she’d be intruding.

 

She stood up, and Emily followed suit. “Let’s go, then.”

 

As they weaved through the crowded cafeteria, Uzi scanned the tables, searching for N among the sea of students.

 

“Hey, over there,” Emily called, nudging Uzi and pointing toward a table near the far side of the room.

 

Uzi followed her gaze and spotted him. N was sitting with J, V, Lizzy, and a couple of other students she didn’t recognize. From a distance, she could already tell that the energy at their table was different—low murmurs, a sharp contrast to the usual cafeteria chatter.

 

As they approached, N’s eyes flicked up, and the moment he saw them, his expression shifted. His tense posture loosened slightly, and he gave a small smile, lifting a hand in a subtle wave. He wasn’t his usual bright, cheerful self, but compared to how he had looked in the gym, there was at least a little relief in his eyes.

 

Lizzy, who had also noticed them, gave a casual wave to Uzi before returning to whatever conversation she was having.

 

Just as Uzi parted her lips to speak, a voice cut through the moment.

 

“Oh, aren’t you the letter girl?

 

Uzi blinked, momentarily thrown off. She turned her head to see V, who had her elbow lazily propped on the table, chin resting on her palm as she looked at her with mild interest.

 

It took Uzi a second to process what she meant before it clicked—the note. The one she had found in her locker. The one that had been addressed to V, only for her to blow her off entirely when she tried to return it.

 

Uzi’s face twisted into an unimpressed scowl. “Wow,” she muttered dryly, crossing her arms, “what a fond memory.”

 

V smirked slightly but didn’t say anything else, clearly pleased that Uzi had remembered.

 

Before Uzi could even get to why she was here, J suddenly leaned forward, eyeing her with interest. She hadn’t spoken during the interaction, because there had been no reason to. But now that Uzi was in front of her, she seemed more intrigued.

 

“So,” J said bluntly, her tone sharp and to the point. “What do you want?”

 

Uzi’s irritation spiked. She hadn’t even been here for a full minute and was already being cut off twice before she could even talk to N. It was aggravating. She didn’t care about whatever weird game V was trying to play, and she definitely didn’t care for J’s attitude. She just wanted to ask N if he wanted to sit with them, but apparently, that was too much to ask.

 

She inhaled through her nose, exhaling sharply. Don’t lose your patience yet.

 

Uzi didn’t waste any time. She turned her gaze to J and said flatly, “I’m not here to talk to you.”

 

J’s eyebrows twitched upward ever so slightly, clearly not expecting that level of bluntness. For a brief second, she looked almost offended, but Uzi didn’t give her a chance to respond.

 

She turned to N instead. “Anyway,” she continued, her tone shifting to something much more casual, “I was just wondering if you wanted to sit with us.”

 

She could feel J’s glare burning into the side of her head, but she ignored it.

 

N blinked, pausing just for a fraction of a second—so subtle that most drones wouldn’t have caught it. But Uzi did. It wasn’t hesitation in the sense that he didn’t want to go. It was more like… something was holding him back.

 

Still, after that brief moment, he nodded. “Yeah,” he said with a small smile. It wasn’t as bright as usual, but it was warm and genuine as he looked at Uzi. He started pushing his chair back to stand.

 

“See you guys,” he said as he turned to J and V.

 

J’s scowl deepened as she stared at Uzi, but N either didn’t notice or chose not to acknowledge it.

 

V, meanwhile, gave an exaggerated, lazy wave. “Later, N,” she said, as if she couldn’t care less.

 

J’s expression flickered with something unreadable as she looked at him, almost like she wanted to say something—but instead, she made a face before quickly masking it and half-heartedly raising a hand in a barely-there wave.

 

Uzi didn’t look back at either of them. Instead, she turned and started walking with N and Emily back toward their table, though that odd moment of hesitation from him still lingered in the back of her mind.

 

As they weaved through the crowded cafeteria, Emily glanced at N with a look of concern. “Hey,” she asked gently, “how are you holding up?”

 

N still looked tense, his shoulders slightly raised, fingers fidgeting at his sides. But he answered regardless. “Oh, uh—yeah, this whole thing kinda threw me off,” he admitted, his voice light but edged with something unshakable. “I mean, it just feels… wrong, you know? The way it happened, and in the school of all places.” He exhaled a shaky laugh, trying to keep up his usual cheery tone. “But, uh, at least it wasn’t more than one drone? That’s—something, I guess?”

 

The attempt at optimism didn’t land. His words carried an uneasy weight, and despite the small, forced chuckle at the end, his discomfort was obvious.

 

Uzi walked beside him in silence for a moment, processing his response. A strange feeling settled in her chest—something close to sympathy, or maybe even sadness. The way he was forcing himself to sound okay, even when he clearly wasn’t… it made her want to do something about it. Comfort him, maybe… Give him a hug or something.

 

The thought immediately made her internally cringe. What? No. That’s weird. She wasn’t about to get all soft like that.

 

Before she could dwell on it any further, they reached their spot.

 

Thad, Rebecca, and Darren turned their attention to them, their conversation pausing as they looked up.

 

“Oh, hey, you guys are back,” Thad said casually, nodding at N.

 

“Hey, N,” Darren greeted with a small smile.

 

Rebecca gave a polite nod. “Glad you came to sit with us.”

 

N offered them a small, appreciative smile as he took a seat. Uzi and Emily followed, sitting down beside him as the conversation picked up again.

Notes:

Okokok so I was able to post a chapter after all, that’s great. I got a few things to say -

So ik like, irl I don’t think a school would make an announcement abt a murder in their school right, cuz that’d be a police issue, and they’d probably realistically shut down the whole school cuz it’d be a bio-hazard or wtv 😭

But who gives af abt realism in this very specific context, plus it would probably throw off the story cuz the next few chapters would be Uzi bored asf in her room trying to figure out what happened, since school would be closed 💀

Ik some schools do make announcements about deaths though, but I don’t think they’d make one if it was a murder, right? And also like, I feel like it adds to the story cuz it’s messed up that the whole school finds out someone died, are told to come to police with any info, and are expected to carry on as normal yk? But the public school system is kinda like that in a way tbh, like they do not gaf istg 😭 in America, at least lol

Oh and ok, I got something different to say - this is a spoiler for the story technically, so js skip to the next chapter if you don’t wanna read this. I can’t figure out how to write it with a strike through so I’m js gonna write it connected to this paragraph - Basically, remember the prologue? Yeah, that was a completely different person (or drone ig.) The prologue takes place like, the end of the last school year, before Uzi even transferred to this school. Again, this is a spoiler, but wanted to say it now cuz this will not be explained until wayyyyyy later, and like if I were yall I’d want context too 😭 If I had to guess, most of yall probably chose to read it cuz ik I would 💀 (assuming anyone is even reading my author’s notes 💔🥀)

OK THANK YOU BYE I’ll post again soon

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 18: Epiphany

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Over the next few days, no matter how much she tried to shake it, Uzi couldn’t stop thinking about the murder.

 

It lingered in the air like a shadow, always present even when drones pretended it wasn’t. Every day at school, she watched as students forced smiles, carried on with their routines, and laughed in the hallways like nothing had happened. But it was all fake. A performance.

 

She could see the cracks in it—the way some drones flinched at sudden noises, the uneasy glances exchanged when someone brought up staying after school, the hushed whispers that died out the moment a teacher walked by. And then there were the ones who stopped showing up altogether. Maybe they were grieving. Maybe they were too scared to step foot in the building, afraid they’d be next.

 

Her own group of friends had, for the most part, moved on. Not in a way that meant they didn’t care—they all had their own ways of processing it. Rebecca and Darren stuck close to each other more than ever, Emily seemed a little more tense, and even Thad, who usually shrugged off serious things, wasn’t cracking jokes about this. But still, life went on. The group joked, hung out, and went about their days as if things were normal.

 

But normal felt wrong.

 

No matter how much everyone tried to pretend, there was something different in the air now, a weight that hadn’t been there before. A quiet, lingering unease that Uzi couldn’t ignore, even when she tried.

 

Uzi lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, the glow of her digital clock casting faint numbers onto the walls. The house was silent, the kind of deep, heavy quiet that only came late at night. Normally, she would have appreciated it. But tonight, it just made her thoughts louder.

 

No matter how much she tried to push them away, the revelation of the murder kept replaying in her head. The announcement, the principal’s grim expression, the gasps from the crowd. The way the entire school had tried to pretend like nothing happened. It made her sick. A student was dead—brutally murdered—and within days, drones were already acting like it was some ghost story, some distant, abstract event that had nothing to do with them.

 

She turned onto her side, gripping the blanket tighter.

 

None of this made sense. Who would do something like this? Why? And how the hell had it happened inside the school without anyone noticing? The whole thing felt too bizarre, too impossible. But it wasn’t impossible. It was real. Someone had died, and the police didn’t even seem to have a lead. If they did, she hadn’t heard about it.

 

That thought made frustration burn in her chest. How could there be nothing? No suspect, no motive, no real answers? It was like everyone was just waiting for this to blow over. The school, the cops, the students. As if ignoring it long enough would make it go away. But it wasn’t going away.

 

Uzi clenched her jaw, sitting up slightly.

 

If no one else was going to do anything, then maybe she should.

 

The thought came suddenly, and at first, she almost laughed at herself. But the more she considered it, the more it made sense. She had listened to enough true crime podcasts, watched enough crime documentaries—she knew how these things worked. Sure, she wasn’t a detective or anything, but she knew what to look for. Clues. Patterns. Inconsistencies.

 

And she was good at putting pieces together.

 

The police didn’t seem to be getting anywhere, but maybe she could. Maybe she could find out what really happened. Someone at school had to know something. A secret they weren’t sharing, something that didn’t add up. And Uzi was determined to figure it out.

 

Lying back down, she exhaled sharply, staring up at the ceiling again.

 

This was her school. Her classmates. And someone had gotten away with murder.

 

She wasn’t going to let that slide.

 

Uzi sat up with a huff, frustration and restlessness making it impossible to stay still. She threw her blankets off and swung her legs over the edge of the bed, the cool air nipping at her. Sleep clearly wasn’t happening anytime soon. Maybe if she distracted herself, did something, she could settle her mind enough to actually get some rest.

 

She moved to her desk, the chair creaking slightly as she sat down. With a quick press of the power button, her computer whirred to life. The sudden brightness of the screen was almost blinding in the dark room, and she winced, squinting as her eyes adjusted. After a few seconds, she typed in her password and pulled up her browser.

 

Her fingers hovered over the keyboard for a moment.

 

What exactly was she looking for?

 

She hesitated before finally typing something along the lines of murder at high school. Almost immediately, results flooded the screen. News articles, forum discussions, social media posts. She scrolled past a few, scanning the dates, until one caught her attention. It was from Monday, just a day after the incident.

 

That was the closest thing to real, immediate information she’d get.

 

Clicking on the link, she leaned forward, eyes darting across the screen as she took in the article.

 

The first few paragraphs summarized what she already knew: a student had been found murdered at school, and the police were still investigating. No suspects had been named. No new information had been released. It was all frustratingly vague.

 

Then, a content warning popped up before the next section. Uzi’s grip on the mouse tightened.

 

It was a written interview—an account from the person who had discovered the body.

 

Her heart rate picked up slightly as she read further.

 

The witness explained that they had been in the school after hours, needing to grab something from the  janitors closet. It was supposed to be a quick, simple task. But when they opened the door, they found themselves in a scene straight out of a nightmare.

 

The victim had been so mutilated they were barely recognizable. The wounds—deep, jagged, unnatural—made it look like they had been attacked by a wild animal. There was so much oil, staining the floor, the walls, pooling beneath the body. The sight was so horrific that the witness admitted they barely had time to process it before their stomach lurched and they had to run out, vomiting from the sheer shock.

 

After that, they immediately called the police.

 

The interview ended there.

 

Uzi stared at the screen, her hands clenched into fists on the desk.

 

Honestly, it was kind of surprising that the police hadn’t flagged this article and taken it down yet. That’s just how reporters are, she assumed, always trying to milk information from witnesses, even if it interfered with the investigation.

 

Even so, this helped her gain a better understanding of the situation. This wasn’t just some simple murder. The brutality, the sheer violence of it—it wasn’t normal. This wasn’t something she could just ignore.

 

And now, more than ever, she needed to find out the truth.

 

There was a little bit more to the article. The next part made Uzi’s stomach churn as she scanned over the words -

 

“It was shocking to investigators when they discovered that this wasn’t an animal attack. DNA testing revealed that this seemingly unmotivated attack was cause by none other than another drone. And…”

 

The article continued on a bit longer about this. Even though in hindsight Uzi already knew that another drone was the murder, just hearing it again didn’t help to calm her nerves.

 

Uzi exhaled sharply, running a hand down her face as she shut her computer. The room was silent again, save for the faint hum of the cooling fans winding down. The glow of the screen disappeared, leaving her alone in the dim light of her desk lamp.

 

Her mind was racing, trying to piece everything together. Everything she had just read swirled around in her head, making it impossible to think about anything else. This wasn’t just some random tragedy that people would eventually forget about—this was brutal. And what made it worse was that no one seemed to have any real answers.

 

She needed more information.

 

All she had right now were scattered details from secondhand sources, half-formed theories, and way too many unanswered questions. If she wanted to get anywhere with this, she needed something real. Something concrete.

 

And the best way to do that?

 

Go to the scene itself.

 

That part of the school had been sealed off since the incident. No one went near it. The hallway was practically cursed in the eyes of the students—just walking past it was enough to send shivers down people’s spines. The crime scene tape, the eerie silence that hung in the air whenever the topic was brought up, the unspoken rule that no one so much as acknowledged what had happened there… it all made the area completely off-limits in everyone's minds.

 

But not for Uzi.

 

If anything, that just made it all the more important to check out.

 

That was where everything started. It only made sense to start there.

 

The thought sent a wave of adrenaline through her, her fingers gripping the edge of her desk. This was insane. She knew that. But there was no way she was just going to sit back and let this whole thing get swept under the rug.

 

Uzi leaned back in her chair, staring up at the ceiling, her mind still buzzing. The plan was solid—sneak into the closed-off hallway, get a firsthand look at the scene, gather whatever clues she could. But then, another thought crept into her mind, one she hadn’t considered before.

 

What if she didn’t do this alone?

 

Her first instinct was to dismiss it. She had always handled things on her own. That was just how she operated. Depending on others only led to disappointment, and she never saw the point in letting anyone in. But… things were different now, weren’t they?

 

She actually had friends.

 

Uzi physically cringed at the thought, groaning as she covered her face with her hands. That sounded so corny. Gross, even. She hated how it made her feel—almost sentimental . She wasn’t some soft, emotional sap who needed a support system. She was fine on her own.

 

…Right?

 

But the more she tried to shake the thought, the more it lingered. She did have drones who cared about her now. Drones she cared about in return, as much as she hated to admit it. And logically speaking, having more than one set of eyes on this investigation could be useful. Different perspectives, different skills—there was no denying that working as a team would be more efficient.

 

She exhaled sharply, gripping the arms of her chair. Fine. Maybe bringing someone in wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world. But that led to another question—who?

 

She had to be smart about this. Not everyone would be up for something like this, and she needed people she could actually trust. The wrong choice could slow her down—or worse, ruin everything.

 

Uzi drummed her fingers against the desk, thinking hard. Who in her friend group would actually be useful in solving a murder?

 

Uzi leaned forward, resting her elbows on her desk as she mulled over her options. If she was really going to do this, she needed the right drones—drones she could trust, who wouldn’t freak out or try to talk her out of it.

 

Darren was the first to come to mind, but she quickly dismissed the idea. Sure, he wasn’t an idiot, and he could probably be useful in some capacity, but she wasn’t exactly close with him. And more importantly, the second she told him anything, he’d tell Rebecca. No question about it. Those two were practically glued together, and if there was one thing she knew, it was that Darren didn’t keep secrets from her.

 

And Rebecca? Yeah, there was no way she’d want any part of this. She just seemed like the type who’d immediately shut it down, telling Uzi it was dangerous or reckless or whatever. And if she got involved, it wouldn’t be to help—it’d be to convince Darren not to do it.

 

So that was a dead end.

 

Then there was Emily. Uzi frowned, drumming her fingers against her desk. Emily had been really shaken up by the whole thing, even days later. Every time the murder was mentioned, she got this wide-eyed, unsettled look, like she couldn’t get it out of her head. Honestly, Uzi was a little surprised she even agreed to come with her to check on N the other day.

 

Yeah… no way was she getting involved in this. Emily was too emotional about it—too scared. If Uzi even brought this up, Emily would probably just tell her she was crazy for even thinking about investigating. And Uzi wasn’t in the mood for that conversation.

 

So that left two drones.

 

Uzi sighed, leaning back in her chair as she thought about Thad. Their friendship was still in this weird in-between state—not quite like it used to be, but not unfamiliar either. There were moments when it felt like no time had passed at all, when he cracked a dumb joke or teased her like they were still in middle school. But then there were other times, like now, when she was painfully aware of how much time they’d spent apart.

 

She hated thinking about it. How she’d moved away, how they lost touch. How years went by without a single word between them until recently. It wasn’t anyone’s fault, really—things just happened. But that didn’t make the sting of it any less real.

 

Still, now that she was back, it was like they were picking up where they left off. And the more she thought about it, the more it made sense—Thad would be the perfect drone to help her. They weren’t as close as they used to be, but she still trusted him. And more importantly, she knew he wouldn’t shut her down. He wasn’t like Emily, too shaken by the murder to even consider digging deeper. If anything, Thad seemed more annoyed by how much drones were talking about it rather than scared.

 

He’d probably think this whole thing was ridiculous, sure. But he wouldn’t say no.

 

And really, that was all she needed.

 

The thought of bringing N into this made Uzi hesitate, a feeling creeping up in her that she didn’t really want to acknowledge. Guilt.

 

N had taken the news of the murder harder than most, even though he tried to act like it didn’t affect him that much. He still smiled, still acted like his usual self, still tried to be positive. But Uzi noticed the small things—the way he tensed up when the topic came up, how he hugged himself a little too tightly when he thought no one was looking, how his usual warmth felt just a little forced.

 

She didn’t pity him. That wasn’t it. But she did feel for him, even if she didn’t know why. Maybe it was because she knew what it was like to put on a front, to pretend things didn’t bother you when they really did.

 

Before that train of thought could go any further, Uzi shut it down, pushing away whatever strange emotions had started bubbling up. None of that mattered right now.

 

What did matter was that, out of everyone, N seemed like the most willing to help. Not in the way Thad would—Thad would probably agree just because he had nothing better to do, or because it sounded like a fun distraction. But N? N would do it because he cared.

 

And that made a difference.

 

Thad might be helpful, sure, but he had a habit of goofing off or not taking things seriously, whether he meant to or not. That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it could be frustrating. N, on the other hand, wouldn’t get distracted. He’d actually try his best, would genuinely want to help. That was just how he was—or at least, that was how Uzi saw him.

 

And if she was really going to do this, she needed someone like that on her side.

 

And with that, Uzi made up her mind.

 

Tomorrow, she would tell Thad and N about her plan. She would ask them to help, lay out what she was thinking, and see if they were on board. It wasn’t like she needed anyone’s approval—if they said no, she’d still go through with it—but having them with her would make a difference. Thad, with his carefree attitude, would make things feel a little less heavy. And N… well, N would actually take it seriously. He would help because he wanted to, because that’s just the kind of drone he was.

 

It felt strange, relying on others like this. She was used to doing things alone, always assuming no one would really get her. But now, for the first time in a long time, she had people she trusted. Drones who, despite everything, cared.

 

Uzi cringed again at that thought. Ugh, that sounded so sentimental. Gross.

 

Shaking her head, she let out a sigh and shut her eyes, forcing herself to push all these thoughts away. What mattered now was tomorrow. She had a plan, a purpose, something to focus on.

 

Now all she had to do was get some sleep and wait for morning to come.

 

Easier said than done.

Notes:

Ofcccc Uzi’s into true crime stuff - like I feel like that fits her character yk 😭🤚
It’s funny to me though that like, she was so bothered by this whole thing that she wanted to figure out what happened - Correct me if I’m wrong but I feel like that’d be really in-character of her, cuz she’s js bold like that
And tbh it’s like, in her mind, she has nothing better to do, so might as well. And like, maybe even if she figures this out, everyone at school will stop being so tense and it’ll be better

Another thing is like, the whole article she was reading. Tbh it’s pretty realistic that reporters will try their hardest to get inside stories or wtv abt a crime, even if it interferes with the investigation. Like they don’t gaf istg 😭 kinda like the whole shoe thing with the night stalker case, if you know what that is. Only difference is this is completely fictional 💀

Idk if I’m gonna post another chapter today im tired ash 💔 I might go drink an energy drink and see how I feel after

Can’t wait to post the next chapters, there’s so much in store, and a lot of lore, if that makes sense

Lastly, thanks for the comments, I really appreciate it 😭😭 Ik I didn’t respond but I promise I’m reading them. Ugh I wish ao3 had a feature where you could like comments, if they do I haven’t figured it out yet ripp, but I don’t think so

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 19: A Favor

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

As Uzi walked into school, she ran through her plan again in her mind. Step one: find N and Thad. Step two: tell them she wanted to investigate the murder. Step three: ask if they’d help. Simple.

 

Or at least, it should be.

 

The more she thought about it, though, the more she realized she had no idea how to bring it up. It wasn’t exactly the kind of thing you just blurted out in the middle of casual conversation. Hey, so I was thinking about sneaking into a crime scene. You in? Yeah, no. That would get her nothing but weird looks.

 

She needed a strategy. Maybe she could pull them aside the next time she saw them—find a quiet spot, away from nosy classmates and teachers. The last thing she wanted was someone overhearing and thinking she was crazy. If she was lucky, she’d get the chance to talk to both of them at once, saving her the trouble of explaining it twice. But if not, she could tell them separately first, then bring them together later.

 

That seemed like the best approach. It would give her time to gauge their reactions, make sure they were actually on board before committing to anything. If one of them said no—though she doubted they would—she’d still have the other. Either way, she wasn’t backing down.

 

Now, she just had to figure out when and where to do it.

 

Before Uzi could dwell on her plan any longer, she instinctively checked her phone—and her stomach dropped. One minute until class started.

 

Her thoughts screeched to a halt, panic kicking in as she shoved her phone back into her pocket and bolted down the hallway. Her boots clanked loudly against the floor as she weaved between students who were still lingering by their lockers, completely oblivious to her crisis.

 

She cursed under her breath, pushing herself to move faster. If she was late, that would only make her day more annoying than it already promised to be. The last thing she needed was a teacher lecturing her while she was trying to figure out how to recruit her ‘investigation team.’

 

Just as the final bell was about to ring, she slipped into the classroom, breathless but victorious.

 

-

 

Third period. Finally.

 

Uzi had never given much thought to this class before—just another period to suffer through—but ever since she actually met N, she realized he’d been here the whole time. It was weird to think about. Before, he had just been another background character in the blur of students she ignored. Now? He was someone she actually knew. Someone who, for better or worse, she actually noticed.

 

As she walked into the classroom, she made her way to her assigned seat. That was probably why they hadn’t met earlier—her seat was all the way across the room from his. If they’d been sitting anywhere near each other, maybe she would’ve known him sooner. Maybe.

 

When she passed by, N caught sight of her and immediately perked up. He shot her a small smile and a wave—nothing over-the-top, just a casual, friendly gesture. Without thinking much about it, Uzi waved back just as easily before settling into her seat.

 

Then the teacher started talking, and Uzi immediately checked out.

 

Tuning out the dull, muttering voice at the front of the room, she flipped open her notebook—not to take notes, obviously, but to start aimlessly doodling in the margins. Her mind drifted, her pencil skimming across the paper as she filled the page with meaningless shapes and patterns. She could already tell this was going to be another long, boring lecture.

 

After about 10 minutes of what seemed like mindless rambling, the teacher, a middle-aged woman with a habit of talking way too much, suddenly clapped her hands together, snapping Uzi out of her daze. The sharp sound made her flinch just a little—not enough for anyone to notice, but enough to pull her back into the present. She barely had time to process her irritation before the teacher launched into her next announcement.

 

“Alright, everyone, listen up! For the next part of today’s lesson, you’ll be working in pairs.”

 

A collective groan rippled through the classroom. No one liked partner work—not because it was hard, but because it was work. Uzi herself would normally be among the ones grumbling. The idea of being forced to collaborate with someone, making small talk and pretending to care, was always a nightmare.

 

But then—

 

“—and since I’m feeling generous today, you can pick your own partners.”

 

The atmosphere of the room instantly changed. The previously unmotivated students suddenly perked up, murmuring excitedly as they scanned the room for their friends.

 

And Uzi?

 

For once, she actually felt relieved.

 

This was perfect. Way too perfect.

 

She could ask N to be her partner, and in doing so, she’d have the perfect opportunity to tell him about her plan. She wouldn’t have to wait, or awkwardly pull him aside later—this had just handed her the chance she needed on a silver platter.

 

She was so caught off guard by how well this worked out that she almost didn’t move right away. It wasn’t often the universe actually helped her. Normally, things went out of their way to be inconvenient. But now, for the first time in a while, things were actually in her favor.

 

She wasn’t about to waste it.

 

The classroom quickly descended into chaotic chatter as students moved around, finding their friends and claiming spots to work. Some stayed at their desks, while others perched on countertops or leaned against walls, making themselves comfortable wherever they could. The teacher, who had long since given up on enforcing any real order during partner work, didn’t seem to mind as long as everyone at least pretended to be productive.

 

Uzi wasted no time. She pushed back her chair and maneuvered through the clusters of students, heading straight for the other side of the room. N had been mid-conversation with someone sitting nearby, but when he caught sight of her approaching, his expression brightened.

 

“Oh! Hey, Uzi,” he greeted, his usual upbeat energy shining through.

 

“Hey,” she replied casually. “Wanna partner up?”

 

If she had any concerns about him hesitating, they were gone in an instant. N immediately nodded, his smile widening. “Yeah, totally!” He sounded genuinely happy about it, like he would’ve said yes even if she hadn’t been his only option.

 

Uzi glanced at the desks around him. The drones nearby were already getting a little too chatty for her liking. It was the perfect excuse to get N away from them—not that she actually cared about distractions. The real issue was making sure no one overheard what she wanted to talk to him about.

 

“This spot’s kinda crowded,” she said, keeping her tone neutral. “Wanna move somewhere quieter?”

 

N didn’t seem to pick up on the real reason behind her suggestion. He just nodded enthusiastically, already pushing his chair back. “Good idea. It’d be way easier to focus.”

 

As he got up, Uzi scanned the room for a better spot. There were students sitting just about everywhere—some on counters, some sprawled out against walls—but then, she spotted it. A corner of the room, tucked away behind a desk, completely unoccupied.

 

Perfect.

 

She gestured toward it. “Over there. No one’s around.”

 

N followed her gaze and gave an approving nod. “Looks good to me.”

 

With that, the two of them made their way across the room, slipping past other students who were too preoccupied with their own conversations to pay them any attention. As they walked, Uzi’s mind raced. This was her chance—she just had to find the right moment to bring it up.

 

As soon as they reached the spot, Uzi slid down against the wall, stretching her legs out in front of her. N followed suit, settling beside her with an easy motion. He crossed his legs and pulled out the worksheet, propping it against a folder as he grabbed his pencil.

 

Uzi immediately saw where this was going. He was actually going to do the assignment. That wasn’t going to work for her. She needed to speak up before he got too focused—or worse, before she lost her nerve entirely.

 

Without giving herself a chance to overthink it, she blurted out, “Hey, I need to talk to you about something important.”

 

N’s pencil paused just above the paper. He blinked, glancing over at her with mild confusion. “Oh? What’s up?” His expression wasn’t concerned, just curious.

 

Uzi hesitated for a fraction of a second, still figuring out how to approach this. She knew she couldn’t just come right out and say, Hey, wanna help me investigate a murder? That was a guaranteed way to make him either panic or think she was insane.

 

“I need help with something,” she started carefully, keeping her voice low. “And… I think you’re the best drone to ask.”

 

That seemed to catch his interest. He tilted his head slightly, pencil still poised between his fingers. “Really?”

 

Uzi nodded, her tone matter-of-fact. “Yeah. I trust you.” She said it plainly, without any sentimental weight, just as a statement of fact.

 

At that, N’s expression shifted slightly. He straightened up a bit, clearly intrigued now. “Okay… I’m listening.”

 

Good. She had his attention. Now came the hard part—actually explaining what she wanted from him.

 

Uzi took a careful breath, choosing her words with precision. “…Obviously, you know about what happened the other day,” she began, keeping her tone as steady as possible.

 

At that, N’s curiosity wavered for just a second. His expression flickered—just a brief change, like something heavy had settled in his mind—but he didn’t interrupt or look away. He just listened, his focus entirely on her. That, at least, was reassuring.

 

Encouraged, she continued, “It’s been bothering me. I mean, I’m sure it’s been bothering everyone.” She glanced at him pointedly. “Probably you, too.”

 

N didn’t react strongly, but there was something in the way he held himself—like he was bracing for whatever she was leading up to.

 

Uzi pressed on. “I’ve been thinking a lot about it. No one talks about it, but it’s still there—hanging over everyone’s heads. And it’s not like the police are making any big progress. No breakthroughs, no answers.” She paused, gauging his reaction. N nodded slightly, his brows knitting together just a little. He looked mildly confused, like he wasn’t sure where she was going with this, but he kept listening nonetheless.

 

Now came the real moment.

 

Uzi hesitated for a fraction of a second before forcing herself to push forward. “So… I want to figure it out. Solve it.” She locked eyes with him, making sure her words carried weight. “I want to find out what really happened. Who did it. And get justice for the victim.”

 

N blinked. His posture straightened slightly, as if trying to fully process what she’d just said.

 

“If we do that,” she added, “then maybe everyone can stop looking over their shoulders, wondering if they’re next.”

 

She let those words settle between them, watching closely for his reaction.

 

N's expression shifted almost imperceptibly at first, his usual bright and easygoing demeanor replaced by something more guarded and serious. The kind of serious Uzi didn’t often see from him. He leaned back slightly, his posture stiffening as he processed what she had just proposed. His gaze lingered on her for a moment, searching her face as if he wasn’t entirely sure whether to take her seriously or not.

 

After a brief, uncomfortable pause, his words tumbled out, a little hesitantly. “Wait... are you… asking me to help you with this?” His voice was softer, but the edge of disbelief was evident.

 

Uzi nodded, her expression steady, but she could sense the weight of the situation finally settling on him. He stared at her for a moment, lips parted, as though trying to find the right words—words that could somehow convey what was going through his head.

 

Then, with a deep exhale, N seemed to zone out for a moment, lost in his own thoughts, his eyes unfocused. The seriousness didn’t quite fade, but the initial shock seemed to settle into concern.

 

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, he spoke again, his tone much softer, but filled with a distinct edge of worry. “Uzi, whoever did this… they’re not just some regular drone. They're dangerous. And if you actually find out who it is...” He swallowed, his hands fidgeting slightly, betraying his nervousness. “What if they find out you’re on to them? What if they hurt you?”

 

His expression grew even more troubled as he leaned in slightly, his voice quieter. “I— I wouldn’t want that. I care about you. A lot.” His eyes flickered with something deeper for a second, but the vulnerability in his voice remained. “I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you.”

 

Uzi could see the earnestness in his eyes, the way his entire demeanor was wrapped in concern. He was worried for her, and she could feel it—he wasn’t just saying words to be comforting, but because he genuinely cared.

 

Uzi felt a strange, almost inexplicable warmth spread across her chest after N's words. It was like something soft and unfamiliar settled inside her—a feeling she wasn’t used to. His concern for her, the genuine care in his voice, stirred something in her that made her feel almost... fuzzy? She didn’t know what to make of it. It made her feel strange, maybe even a little flustered. It wasn’t exactly discomforting, but it was definitely something she hadn’t anticipated.

 

Her face flushed slightly, the warmth creeping up her neck as she tried to shake off the feelings that followed his words. She brushed her fingers over her cheek, attempting to distract herself from the odd sensation. It wasn’t that she disliked the warmth of his care—it was just that it felt too much, too real for her to process right now.

 

Before she could say anything in response, N spoke again, his voice cutting through her thoughts. “So... what if I said no? What would you do? Would you still go after this on your own?”

 

Uzi blinked at him, her mind temporarily pulled away from the swirl of emotions she was trying to make sense of. She quickly wiped her hand over her face, feeling the warmth in her cheeks again as she rubbed it away. She cleared her throat, a little self-conscious, and then met his gaze as she spoke, her voice hesitating slightly.

 

“I… I would still do it,” she said slowly, her gaze steady. “I’ve already made up my mind. Even if you don’t help me, I’m not backing down.” Her voice was quieter now, the conviction clearer in her words than before. She wasn’t going to let anything stop her from finding out the truth. “But… I was also going to see if Thad would help.” She added, a small, sheepish smile spreading on her face as she spoke.

 

N didn’t respond immediately, but there was a flicker of something in his eyes—uncertainty, maybe? He furrowed his brow slightly, clearly processing her words. After a beat, he asked, “Okay, but... what if Thad says no? What then?”

 

Uzi paused at that, the question hanging in the air as she thought it over. The possibility of Thad not agreeing to help hadn’t crossed her mind in that way. She didn’t even let herself entertain it for too long.

 

“No,” she replied, after a moment’s consideration. “If Thad says no, it won’t change anything. I’m doing this, whether I have help or not.”

 

Her tone was firm now, more sure of herself than she’d felt in the conversation up to that point. It wasn’t about the help—if they helped, great. If not, she’d still find a way. She wasn’t going to back down from this investigation. Not now.

 

N remained quiet for a moment, his eyes scanning her face as if searching for any sign that she might be wavering. But Uzi’s resolve remained firm. Despite the uncertainty and the vulnerability that N had shown, Uzi was more determined than ever to see this through—on her own, or with help.

 

N’s gaze lingered on her for a moment longer, his brow furrowed slightly as he weighed her words. He let out a slow breath and gave a small nod, his tone more steady now, though there was a trace of hesitation lingering in his voice. “Alright... I’ll help you. You’re right—I can’t just let you do this on your own.” His words were deliberate, more certain than before. He was still clearly processing the gravity of the situation, but the decision was made, and Uzi could feel the shift in him.

 

The relief that washed over Uzi was immediate and almost overwhelming. A weight she hadn’t realized she was carrying seemed to lift from her chest. She exhaled, her shoulders relaxing as she felt a renewed sense of confidence. A slight smile tugged at her lips, though it was tempered by the seriousness of their conversation. “Thanks, N,” she said softly, genuinely grateful. “I’ve already gathered a lot of info about the situation. I’ve been looking into it for a while now.”

 

The words flowed naturally, the relief in her voice clear as she spoke. For a brief moment, she allowed herself to savor the fact that N had agreed to help. But even as she said it, a thought crept into her mind.

 

N had been right. The danger of doing this alone hadn’t truly hit her until now. She hadn’t even thought about the risks involved—what if the drone behind all this was dangerous? What if she put herself in harm’s way trying to uncover the truth? Uzi felt a pang of unease, but it was quickly replaced by a renewed sense of determination. With N agreeing to be by her side, she wouldn’t have to carry the burden alone.

 

Now that the decision had been made, she couldn’t help but feel more certain than ever. The weight of uncertainty that had hung over her was now replaced with a clearer path ahead. She wasn’t alone in this anymore. Together, they would solve the mystery—and that sense of solidarity filled her with a quiet strength.

Notes:

Wowoowwo another chapter

Ok so, ik no one asked, but like if you were wondering how long had passed so far in the story, here’s a timeline thing: it’s probably been abt 2-3 weeks since the beginning.

- The first week was when Uzi found the letter, next day found another one, got a detention, next day met N’s friend group, and then the next day was invited to hang out with them.

- The same day she was invited (Saturday) she went to the hang out. Then, the hang out went into the middle of the night of the next day (Sunday) which was also when the murder took place (according to the news and stuff from Uzi’s pov. But I’m gonna confirm is true, it did happen on Sunday.)

- Monday passed without incident, but I didn’t detail it in the story. It was just a normal day, and no one knew because the somehow the school kept it secret. Maybe the victim didn’t have a lot of friends or som, or the ones he did have assumed he was sick yk, had no idea he was dead.

- Tuesday was the actual announcement and then everyone was like absolutely traumatized 😭

- Then, it’s not specified how many days took place after that. Let’s assume when Uzi was thinking alone in her room, it was the beginning of the next week. That brings us to modern day in the story so far, this chapter.

There will be another specified date later in this week, but not gonna say cuz don’t wanna spoil it yk 🫢

ALSO THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE COMMENTS IT MEANS ALOT 😭😭😭😭😭 tbh I thought no one was gonna really interact with this story and I js wanted to post it cuz why not. But since people actually seem to be interested, I’m gonna try and have a consistent posting schedule of at LEAST one chapter a day. I’m usually really busy the, but there will be times where I post 2-5 in a day if I literally have nothing else to do. Pretty sure I mentioned before that I wrote a shit ton while I was waiting for my ao3 acc to be activated, istg like it was ridiculous it took them a month 😭

And then when I’m not posting, I’m writing later chapters which I’m ABSOLUTELY cooking in I swear, I’m literally so happy with what I have this is so fun. Fuck writers block, can’t get to me ho 🙄🤚

Ok that’s all I have to say bye

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 20: Demurral

Summary:

For context, this takes place after school, the same day as the last chapter.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi sat slouched at her desk, eyes locked onto her computer screen as she mashed the controls, immersed in the fast-paced chaos of her game. Each click and movement felt almost mechanical—muscle memory guiding her through the motions. She had long since tuned out the world around her, fully absorbed in the gameplay. But as the match concluded and the victory screen flashed across her monitor, the sense of satisfaction was fleeting. Letting out a quiet sigh, she exited the game, her cursor hovering over the shut-down option for a second before finally clicking it. The hum of the PC fans slowed, then faded into silence as the screen went black.

 

Leaning back in her chair, she grabbed her phone from the desk and checked the time—8:36 PM.

 

For a moment, she just stared at the numbers, her mind shifting gears as she recalled what she had meant to do. The realization hit her quickly: she never got around to talking to Thad. They didn’t share any classes, and lunch had been just as chaotic as ever, leaving no real opportunity to pull him aside. But she did remember mentioning it to him in passing, telling him she needed to talk to him about something important in private.

 

That, of course, had only made him suspicious.

 

Thad had immediately started pestering her, demanding to know what it was about. His curiosity had been relentless, and he hadn’t exactly been subtle about it either. She could practically hear his exasperated tone in her head, recalling how he had kept pressing her for answers. But she had stood her ground, refusing to tell him right then and there. Eventually, he had given up—but not without some grumbling, clearly annoyed that she was making him wait.

 

Uzi sighed, tapping her fingers against the side of her phone as she mulled over what to do next. It wasn’t like she could just leave this conversation for another day—she needed to talk to him. And sooner rather than later.

 

Uzi exhaled through her nose, gripping her phone a little tighter as she made up her mind. She’d FaceTime Thad. It was the quickest way to get this over with—assuming he even picked up. If he didn’t, well, that would be a whole other problem. She really didn’t want to wait until tomorrow to do this.

 

Tapping over to his contact, she hesitated for only a second before pressing the call button. The screen displayed the ringing animation, and she braced herself, half-expecting him to ignore it. But after the third ring, the screen flickered, and Thad’s face appeared.

 

He was lounging in bed, propped up against his pillows, looking completely at ease. His hoodie was slightly rumpled, and his posture screamed relaxation. The way he answered was just as nonchalant—his tone cool and casual. “Yo.”

 

Uzi felt a small wave of relief that he had actually picked up. “Hey.”

 

Thad raised an eyebrow. “So? What’s up?”

 

She didn’t waste time getting to the point. “You remember earlier? When I said I needed to talk to you in private?”

 

At that, his interest visibly piqued. His expression shifted from indifferent to intrigued, and he leaned slightly closer to the camera. “Ohhh, yeah. The super ‘secret’ thing you wouldn’t tell me at lunch.”

 

She could already tell where this was going. He started prodding at her. “So are you going to tell me or what?” He stated eagerly. “You were being so dramatic about it - is it really that important?” He exaggerated his words as he spoke.

 

Uzi rolled her eyes, cutting him off. “Okay, shut up. I’m literally about to tell you.”

 

Thad huffed, clearly unimpressed with her attitude, but still leaned back against his pillows with a resigned look. “Fine, fine. Go ahead.”

 

Uzi leaned back in her chair, gripping her phone with both hands as she exhaled. “Alright, I’m just gonna be blunt with you.”

 

Thad raised an eyebrow, waiting.

 

Unlike with N, she didn’t feel the need to dance around her words. She knew Thad well enough to know that sugarcoating things wasn’t necessary—he could handle straightforwardness. It wasn’t that N was weak or anything, but he was definitely more sensitive, more inclined to worry. Thad, on the other hand, wasn’t like that.

 

She met his gaze through the screen. “You remember what happened recently? The announcement. The student that was—”  She didn’t even have to finish the sentence.

 

Thad’s easygoing demeanor flickered for just a second. It wasn’t a huge reaction, but she caught it—a brief tensing of his shoulders, the way his fingers curled slightly where they rested on his blanket.

 

There was a beat of hesitation before he responded, his voice measured. “Yeah… what about it?”

 

He wasn’t exactly nervous, not the way N had been. But there was something there—something guarded, cautious. His expression wasn’t tense, but his usual laid-back air felt just a little forced now, like he was trying to read where she was going with this before giving away too much himself.

 

Uzi exhaled, leaning forward slightly. "Look, I’ve been thinking about this a lot. The police aren’t doing anything—or if they are, they’re being way too quiet about it. Meanwhile, everyone at school is just sitting around, waiting to see if they’re next. So I figured… why not try to figure it out myself? Find out who did it and stop them."

 

Thad blinked. Then, after a brief pause, he let out an awkward laugh. "Okay, yeah, sure. Funny. You got me. Now quit messing around."

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed. "I’m not joking, Thad."

 

That made him stop. His grin faltered slightly, his head tilting as he gave her a more scrutinizing look.

 

"...Wait. You're serious?" His tone was different now—less amused, more incredulous.

 

Uzi folded her arms. "Yes, I’m serious." She then cut straight to the point. "I want your help. I don’t wanna do this alone. And I trust you."

 

Thad didn’t respond immediately. He just stared at her through the screen, like he was waiting for her to suddenly crack a smile and say Gotcha! or something. But she didn’t.

 

After a few seconds, he let out a slow breath, running a hand down his face. "You’re actually being for real right now?"

 

Uzi’s patience was running thin. She scoffed, her voice sharper now. “Yes, Thad. I just said that."

 

Thad rubbed the back of his head, looking uncomfortable. He took a moment before sighing. “Look, Uzi… I’m sorry, but I don’t want to get involved in all that.” His voice was firm, but there was no hostility in it. Just honesty.

 

Uzi blinked. She wasn’t sure what she had expected, but it wasn’t this. She figured he might hesitate or need some convincing, but outright refusing? That caught her off guard.

 

Thad continued, his expression serious. “No hard feelings or anything. I just… I don’t think it’s a good idea, and I don’t wanna be part of it.”

 

Uzi sat there in silence for a moment, processing. She wasn’t upset—she got it. It wasn’t exactly a low-stakes situation. But still, something in her pushed her to ask, “Why?”

 

She wasn’t demanding, wasn’t trying to guilt him into changing his mind. She just genuinely wanted to know.

 

Thad exhaled sharply, shifting slightly in his bed before speaking bluntly. “Uzi, it’s obviously dangerous. You know that, right?” His tone wasn’t condescending, just straightforward. “And, no offense, but you’re being impulsive about this.”

 

Uzi tensed. That stung more than she wanted to admit. She had expected reluctance from him, sure, but outright calling her impulsive? That hit a nerve. She felt the urge to snap back, to argue, but before she could, she hesitated. Because… as much as she hated to admit it, he wasn’t entirely wrong. She had jumped headfirst into this investigation without fully thinking through how dangerous it could actually be.

 

She sighed, her frustration deflating into something more resigned. “Yeah… I guess I can understand why you said no.” She leaned back against her chair, running a hand through her hair. It wasn’t what she wanted to hear, but at least he wasn’t sugarcoating it.

 

Thad nodded, his expression lightening just a bit. “Good luck, then. Not that you need it. I already know you’re gonna do this anyway.”

 

Uzi let out a small laugh, shaking her head. “You know me too well.”

 

Thad smirked slightly, then shifted in his bed. “Speaking of you being impulsive—did you see that ridiculous stunt someone pulled in gym today? I swear, it was almost as reckless as something you’d do.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes but couldn’t help but smirk as the conversation drifted into something more casual.

 

-

 

Their conversation carried on for about an hour, shifting between random topics, inside jokes, and occasional sarcastic remarks. It was easy, familiar—just the usual back-and-forth that made time slip by without either of them noticing. But eventually, the conversation wound down, and with a few final words, they both said goodbye and hung up.

 

As the call ended, Uzi let out a deep breath, sinking back into her chair. The room was quiet again, save for the distant hum of her computer’s fan. Her mind drifted back to their conversation, but more than that, she kept circling back to the part that lingered the most—Thad outright refusing to help. She had half-expected him to joke about it, maybe even hesitate before eventually giving in, but instead, he’d called her impulsive and shut the idea down completely.

 

And yeah, maybe she was impulsive. She could admit that much to herself. But so what? What was wrong with wanting to do something about this? A student had been murdered, and no one seemed to be doing anything. If she could figure out who was responsible, she could stop it from happening again. That was the only thing that mattered.

 

Her fingers drummed against her desk as she thought about how differently N had reacted. Unlike Thad, N hadn’t shut her down or called her impulsive. He had hesitated, sure, but in the end, he had agreed to help. Maybe if she had told Thad that N was on board, he would’ve reacted differently. Maybe he would’ve felt more inclined to say yes. Or maybe not. Either way, she chose not to dwell on it too much. She had a goal, and with or without Thad, she was going to see it through.

Notes:

Did you expect that?

I didn’t want to make it like,’oh, everything’s gonna go her way and it’ll be super predictable’ yk

Personally, I don’t want this story to be predictable at all cuz like, that’ll js add so much to it

I barely had any time to post this but I promised that I was gonna post at least once a day so here you go 😭

Again, though, thanks for the support!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 21: Plan

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The morning sun filtered through the bus windows, casting streaks of light across the worn seats. Uzi sat in her usual spot, near the back, resting her head against the cool glass. She slipped her headphones in, drowning out the distant chatter of other students as she stared out at the passing streets. The usual routine. The world outside blurred into streaks of color, but her mind was sharp, already mapping out her next steps.

 

She had spent the night thinking—too much, probably. There was no doubt in her mind that she needed to move forward with the investigation. And now, with N officially on board, it was time to loop him in on her plan. The timing couldn’t be better. He’d be getting on the bus soon, and that meant they could talk before school started.

 

As the bus made its usual stops, Uzi subtly glanced toward the front, keeping an eye on the students boarding. Her anticipation built with each stop, and just as she was beginning to grow impatient, she finally spotted a familiar figure stepping onto the bus. Sure enough, there was N, his bright yellow eyes scanning the rows of seats.

 

Uzi tugged out one of her earbuds, making a point to catch his eye. She gave him a small wave—not too obvious, but enough to get his attention. N’s expression lit up when he saw her, and he waved back enthusiastically before making his way over. Sliding into the seat beside her, he grinned.

 

“Morning, Uzi!” he greeted cheerfully. “How’d you sleep?”

 

She sighed, rubbing her eyes. “Terribly,” she admitted bluntly.

 

N’s cheerful expression softened, his brows knitting together slightly. It wasn’t pity—Uzi could tell he wasn’t the type to pity others—but there was an unmistakable empathy in his eyes.

 

“That sucks,” he said, his voice quieter now. “I hope you get better sleep soon.”

 

She let out a tired chuckle. “Yeah, me too.”

 

As the bus continued down the road, she found herself lost in thought again. Sleep had felt impossible lately—mentally, she was drained, but physically, her body refused to shut down. Every night, her mind ran in circles, replaying whatever was on her mind over and over, refusing to let her rest. It was exhausting. But now wasn’t the time to dwell on that. She had a plan, and she needed to tell N about it.

 

Uzi pulled out her other earbud, wrapping the cords around her fingers before tucking them into her bag. Normally, she wouldn’t bother—her music was a lifeline, especially on the bus—but right now, she needed to focus. This conversation was too important to be half-listening.

 

She turned to N, exhaling slightly before getting straight to the point. “You remember what I asked you yesterday?” she started, keeping her voice low. “About helping me figure out who’s behind the murder?”

 

N didn’t seem particularly surprised, but there was a brief flicker of something in his expression—hesitation, maybe. He stiffened ever so slightly before nodding. “Yeah…?” he said. “What about it?”

 

Uzi leaned in a bit, lowering her voice even more. “I’ve got a plan now. A real plan.”

 

At that, N straightened, his usual relaxed posture shifting as he gave her his full attention. “Alright,” he said, sounding genuinely interested. “What’s the plan?”

 

She glanced around the bus quickly before continuing. “I want to go to the crime scene. The janitor’s closet—the one that’s still marked off with caution tape.”

 

N blinked, tilting his head slightly. “Wait, hold on. You mean actually go in there?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

He raised a brow, looking skeptical. “You do realize they have the place blocked off for a reason, right?” He gestured vaguely. “Like you just said, it’s literally marked. No one’s gonna just let us waltz in.”

 

Uzi smirked slightly. “I know. But hear me out—I have an idea.”

 

N watched her carefully, his expression somewhere between intrigued and concerned, but he didn’t interrupt. He just waited, ready to hear whatever crazy plan she was about to suggest.

 

Uzi leaned in just a bit more, her voice steady but laced with excitement. “We go in after hours,” she said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Once everyone’s gone.”

 

N blinked, looking at her like he wasn’t sure he heard her right. “Wait… Are you saying we should break into the school?”

 

Uzi shrugged, unfazed. “I guess so.”

 

N stared at her for a second before leaning back slightly, processing her words. His initial surprise faded into something more uneasy. “Uzi… I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” he said slowly. “If we get caught, we could get into serious trouble. And isn’t, like… interfering with a crime scene illegal?”

 

Uzi made a face, unimpressed. “It’s only illegal if we get caught.”

 

N scoffed at that, letting out a breath of disbelief before laughing lightly. “Oh yeah, because that makes it better.”

 

Uzi smirked slightly, undeterred. “I’m serious. As long as we’re smart about it, we should be fine.”

 

N still didn’t look convinced, but the hesitation in his expression was now mixed with reluctant intrigue. He wasn’t saying no… at least, not yet.

 

N let out a slow breath, rubbing the back of his head as he finally gave in. “Alright… fine. But now we need to figure out the best way to actually do this.” His eyes flicked toward her, uncertain but willing. “How are we even getting inside after school ends?”

 

At that, Uzi’s lips curled into a smirk. “We don’t leave.”

 

N furrowed his brows slightly. “Wait—what?”

 

“We stay after,” Uzi clarified, leaning forward slightly as if she was letting him in on some grand secret. “We just wait it out until the evening.”

 

N frowned, his fingers tapping idly against his knee as he considered it. “How? Drones would notice if we stuck around for no reason. Teachers, staff… someone’s bound to get suspicious.”

 

Uzi waved a hand dismissively. “Easy. We go to the library. If anyone asks, we’re studying.” She paused before adding, “And besides, there are places in there that are pretty well hidden. If we time it right and lay low, no one’s going to find us.”

 

N was silent for a moment, processing her plan. He nodded slowly, then repeated it back to her in a brief summary to make sure he had it right. “So, after school, we meet in the library like we’re just studying. Then we wait it out and hide until it’s empty, and once it’s late enough, we sneak out and head to the crime scene.”

 

Uzi gave him an approving nod. “Exactly.”

 

N still looked a little uneasy, but there was a determined glint in his eyes now. “Alright,” he said with a sigh, “I’ll meet you there after school.”

 

Uzi leaned back, satisfied. “Good. Just don’t be late.”

 

N let out a small, nervous chuckle, but there was a hint of a smile behind it. “Yeah… wouldn’t want to miss our ‘study session.’

Notes:

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 22: Library

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

All throughout the day, a gnawing feeling settled in Uzi’s stomach—an anxious, restless energy that she couldn’t quite shake. Was it nerves? Excitement? Some strange, tangled mix of both? Either way, it made it impossible to focus.

 

Her classes blurred together, the words of her teachers fading into background noise as her mind wandered. Every so often, she’d snap herself back to attention, only to get lost in thought again moments later. What if this actually worked? What if she and N really uncovered something—exposed the murderer lurking in plain sight? It was a thrilling, almost cinematic idea, but reality wasn’t a movie. There was a very real chance they wouldn’t find anything at all. Or worse… that they’d find something they weren’t prepared to handle.

 

And yet, despite the uncertainty, her determination didn’t waver. Reckless? Maybe. But she wasn’t going to just sit back and do nothing.

 

By the time the final bell rang, the weight in her chest hadn’t eased. If anything, it had only grown heavier. Adjusting her backpack straps, she took a steadying breath and headed toward the library. This was it—the beginning of everything.

 

Uzi pushed open the heavy library doors, and a wave of cool, conditioned air met her, prickling against her metal frame. She shivered slightly, stepping inside and letting the door shut softly behind her.

 

The school’s library was more expansive than most, stretching wide with towering bookshelves lining the back half of the room, forming a labyrinth of knowledge. The front was more open, filled with neatly arranged tables and study areas where students sat hunched over textbooks or quietly whispering among themselves. The lighting was soft, a mix of warm overhead fixtures and the natural glow filtering through large windows near the entrance. The scent of aged paper and ink lingered in the air, a subtle contrast to the faint hum of the air conditioning.

 

Uzi’s sharp eyes scanned the room, searching for the perfect spot—somewhere secluded, yet not too far from the entrance to the dense rows of bookshelves. Her gaze landed on a table positioned near the middle of the open area, just on the edge of where the organized space dissolved into a maze of towering shelves. It was tucked away enough to avoid prying eyes, but still within reach of an easy escape if needed.

 

Without hesitation, she strode toward it, her footsteps muffled by the thick carpet. The quiet atmosphere of the library was only occasionally interrupted by the faint rustle of pages turning or hushed conversations from students working together. She pulled out a chair, the legs scraping softly against the floor, and sat down. Sliding her bag off her shoulder, she set it beside her and pulled out a few books—props to sell the illusion that she was here to study.

 

Now, all she had to do was wait for N to show up.

 

As if on cue, the library doors swung open again, and Uzi glanced up just in time to see N step inside. He paused for a moment, scanning the room, his eyes flicking over the various tables and rows of bookshelves until they landed on her. Spotting her, he perked up slightly and gave a small, friendly wave before weaving his way through the tables toward her.

 

When he reached the table, he let his bag slip off his shoulder, setting it down with a soft thud before pulling out the chair beside her and sitting down. Uzi leaned back slightly, arms crossed, a smirk tugging at her lips. “Look who finally decided to show up,” she remarked, her tone teasing.

 

N chuckled, shaking his head. “Hey, I wasn’t trying to be late,” he defended lightly. “Some of us actually had to get through the hall traffic.” His expression was amused, his usual cheerful demeanor as present as ever.

 

As he spoke, his eyes drifted to the books Uzi had spread out on the table, and taking the hint, he reached into his bag. He pulled out a notebook, a couple of pencils, and a slightly worn folder before placing them neatly in front of him. He shuffled them absentmindedly, tapping one of the pencils against the edge of the table as he leaned in slightly toward Uzi.

 

“So,” he murmured, keeping his voice low, “what’s the plan now?”

 

Uzi didn’t look up from the book she had flipped open, turning a page idly. “We wait,” she answered simply.

 

N raised a brow. “Wait for what, exactly?”

 

She finally glanced up at him, tilting her head slightly. “For most of the students to clear out,” she explained. “Once the place is empty enough, we go hide and wait for the building to close.”

 

N frowned thoughtfully, tapping the eraser of his pencil against the table. “And where exactly are we supposed to hide?”

 

Uzi turned slightly in her seat and subtly gestured toward the entrance of the vast bookshelves behind them. “There,” she said. “It’s like a maze back there—tons of places no one would bother checking.”

 

N followed her gaze, his expression shifting as he considered her words. After a moment, he nodded, a small look of approval crossing his face. “Yeah… that could work,” he agreed. “That’s actually a solid plan.”

 

Uzi smirked, satisfied. “Of course it is.”

 

N flipped open his folder, pulling out a slightly crumpled sheet of paper and smoothing it out on the table. He grabbed a pencil and, without hesitation, started writing.

 

Uzi glanced over, raising a brow. “What are you doing?” she asked, tilting her head slightly.

 

N didn’t look up as he continued jotting something down. “Homework,” he replied casually. “Might as well get it out of the way while we wait.”

 

Uzi scoffed, leaning back in her chair. “Yeah, no thanks. I think I’ll just take a nap instead.” She folded her arms, already getting comfortable.

 

N let out an exaggerated sigh, finally lifting his head to look at her. “Uzi,” he said, giving her a knowing look, “you shouldn’t procrastinate. Especially when you have nothing else to do.” His voice wasn’t scolding in a harsh way, more like someone offering genuine advice.

 

Uzi rolled her eyes, a smirk tugging at the corner of her mouth. “Do you even know me?” she shot back. “Procrastination is, like, my favorite pastime.”

 

N shook his head with a quiet laugh. “Yeah, I figured.” He didn’t push the subject further, just turning his attention back to his paper and continuing his work.

 

For a moment, Uzi simply watched him, then stared down at her own bag, debating silently. The idea of getting ahead on homework was definitely unappealing, but… maybe he had a point. It wasn’t like she had anything better to do until the library cleared out.

 

With a resigned sigh, she grabbed her bag, pulled out a pencil, and flipped open one of her workbooks. Reluctantly, she turned to the page she had been avoiding and started writing.

 

Out of the corner of her eye, she caught N glancing up. When he noticed her actually working, he smiled softly, just for a second, before going back to his paper.

 

Uzi blinked at that, surprised by how oddly contagious that small gesture was. Before she knew it, she found herself smiling, too.

 

-

 

The next hour passed in an oddly peaceful rhythm. More and more students filtered out of the library, some leaving in pairs, others alone, until only a handful remained. Uzi kept herself occupied with her homework, occasionally nudging N for help when a question stumped her. Sometimes, the two of them would lapse into quiet conversation, exchanging the occasional sarcastic remark or joke to pass the time. For once, everything felt strangely normal—almost like they were just two students staying late to study.

 

As Uzi worked, she absentmindedly glanced out the window. The sky had darkened slightly—not quite sunset, but the daylight was starting to fade. It was a subtle but clear reminder that time was moving forward, and soon, the school would be empty.

 

That was when she noticed a teacher moving about the library, stopping by tables to speak with the remaining students. Uzi observed as, one by one, the students packed up their things and made their way to the exit. It didn’t take long for her to piece together what was happening—whoever this teacher was, probably the librarian, she was telling people to leave.

 

Uzi tensed slightly and, as quietly as possible, began sliding her books back into her bag.

 

N, noticing her sudden movement, furrowed his brow. “What’s up?” he asked, keeping his voice low.

 

Uzi leaned in slightly, whispering, “That teacher—she’s making people leave. I think the school’s about to close.” She subtly nodded in the librarian’s direction as the woman spoke to another student.

 

N followed her gaze, watching for a moment before nodding in understanding. Without further question, he started packing up his things as well, though there was a hint of tension in his movements now.

 

Once his bag was packed, N glanced at Uzi again. “Alright, so what now?” he murmured.

 

Uzi’s eyes flicked toward the rows of bookshelves behind them, then back to N. Keeping her voice low, she said, “We wait until she’s distracted, then we slip into the shelves. If we time it right, she won’t even notice we’re still here.”

 

N exhaled quietly and gave a small nod, shifting slightly in his seat. “Alright… let’s hope this works.”

 

Uzi smirked slightly, eyes glinting with anticipation. “It will.”

 

Uzi pulled the zipper of her bag closed with painstaking care, ensuring it didn’t make a sound. She turned to N, eyes sharp with focus. “Next time she stops to talk to a student, that’s when we move,” she whispered.

 

N gave a small nod, his expression serious. The two of them fell silent, their attention fixed on the librarian as she slowly made her way around the room. Uzi’s heart pounded in her chest, the tension almost suffocating. Every second felt stretched out, agonizingly slow, as they waited for the right moment. She tightened her grip on her bag strap, fingers clenching instinctively.

 

Then—finally—the opportunity came.

 

The librarian stopped beside a student lounging on a beanbag chair, bending slightly to speak with them. Her back was fully turned, her attention elsewhere. It was now or never.

 

Uzi and N locked eyes, exchanging a silent understanding. Uzi barely moved her lips as she mouthed the word: Now.

 

In perfect sync, they both rose from their chairs with practiced quiet, careful not to scrape the legs against the floor. They moved quickly but soundlessly, their footsteps deliberate as they navigated toward the entrance of the towering bookshelves. Uzi’s gaze remained locked on the librarian, her pulse racing with every step. She was hyper-aware of every small sound—the distant rustle of pages, the murmur of a student finishing a conversation, the soft hum of the overhead lights.

 

The moment they stepped into the labyrinth of shelves, vanishing from view, Uzi let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. She inhaled deeply, then exhaled in quiet relief before turning to N with a small, triumphant smirk.

 

“We made it,” she whispered.

 

N let out a breath of his own, his expression relaxing slightly. For a brief moment, they shared a silent victory, the tension easing just enough to let a flicker of excitement take its place.

 

Uzi moved forward, her steps light against the floor as she navigated deeper into the maze of bookshelves. The towering cases loomed over her, packed tightly with books of all sizes, their spines forming a wall of muted colors. The air was thick with the scent of paper, and the further she walked, the quieter everything seemed. The occasional muffled sound of a page turning or a chair shifting in the distance was the only indication of life outside their secluded path.

 

Behind her, N quickened his pace to catch up. “Uh—where exactly are we going?” he asked in a hushed voice, glancing around the seemingly endless rows of books.

 

Uzi turned her head slightly but didn’t stop walking. “Just looking for a good place to stay put until the school's completely closed,” she replied casually.

 

N gave a small nod, still trailing behind her. “Sounds good,” he murmured, glancing at the shelves around them.

 

They wandered further into the labyrinth, the distant hum of the school growing fainter with every turn they took. Eventually, Uzi came to a halt at a dead end, where the shelves boxed them in on three sides, creating a small, hidden alcove. She gestured for N to follow her as she slid down to sit on the floor, resting her back against the cool surface of the bookshelf. With a quiet thump, she set her bag down beside her.

 

N followed suit, settling down next to her and placing his own bag at his side. He shifted slightly, adjusting to the hard floor before letting out a soft exhale.

 

Uzi wasted no time digging into her bag, rustling through its contents for a moment before pulling out a bag of chips. She tore it open with a quiet pop, the faint scent of salt and seasoning filling the air.

 

N glanced at her, his expression softening with mild amusement as he shook his head. “Of course,” he murmured with a small chuckle.

 

Uzi smirked and, without hesitation, held the bag out toward him. “Want one?”

 

N gave a grateful nod. “Yeah, thanks,” he said, reaching in and taking a chip.

 

“No problem,” Uzi responded as she tossed one into her mouth, the satisfying crunch breaking the otherwise quiet atmosphere.

 

Time dragged on in the quiet corner of the library. Uzi had long since finished her chips, crumpling the empty bag and stuffing it back into her backpack. The initial excitement of sneaking around had dulled into boredom, the minutes stretching endlessly as she and N made idle conversation before eventually resorting to scrolling through their phones.

 

She wasn’t really paying attention to what she was looking at—just mindlessly flicking her thumb across the screen, anything to pass the time. Every now and then, she would glance up, watching as N sat beside her, just as absorbed in his own screen. The silence between them wasn’t uncomfortable, but it made her restless.

 

It didn’t help that she was starting to feel tired. The stillness of the library, combined with the low hum of the building’s ventilation, lulled her into a sense of relaxation. Her body felt heavier, her eyelids drooping despite her best efforts to stay alert. She shifted slightly, rubbing her eyes in an attempt to fight off the drowsiness.

 

Then, without warning, the lights shut off.

 

Uzi barely reacted, only blinking at the sudden darkness. The shift didn’t faze her—she had been expecting it. But beside her, N glanced up from his phone, his eyes flicking to her.

 

"Should we go now?" he asked, keeping his voice low, as if worried someone might still hear them.

 

Uzi shook her head, adjusting her posture slightly. “Not yet. It’s too early,” she murmured. “We should wait at least another thirty minutes—maybe an hour—just to be sure everyone’s gone.”

 

N exhaled through his nose, nodding in understanding. “Guess we’re lucky we even made it this far without getting caught.”

 

Uzi gave a small smirk but didn’t respond. Instead, a new thought crossed her mind, one that made her expression falter.

 

She wondered what N had told his parents about being out this late. She hadn’t even considered it before, too focused on her own cover story.

 

Her dad hadn’t questioned her at all when she told him she was staying over at a friend’s house. In fact, he barely even acknowledged it, just giving a distracted nod before going back to whatever work he was buried in.

 

She’d known he wouldn’t care—he never did. Maybe it was even a relief for him, not having her around. Less responsibility, less to deal with.

 

The thought made something tighten in her chest. Annoyance. Frustration. Maybe even something closer to hurt, though she quickly shoved that feeling down.

 

Typical.

 

Uzi turned her head toward N, breaking the quiet between them. “So,” she started, her voice light with curiosity, “what excuse did you come up with for staying out this late?”

 

She expected him to answer casually, maybe even joke about it. But instead, she saw something shift in his expression. His posture stiffened slightly, and there was a noticeable hesitation before he finally spoke.

 

“I, uh… I didn’t tell them anything,” he admitted, his voice coming out uncharacteristically uneasy, words slightly stumbling over each other.

 

That caught Uzi off guard. She blinked at him, momentarily thrown by his reaction. That wasn’t like him at all. “What do you mean?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

 

N exhaled, his shoulders sinking as he fidgeted with his hands. “They’re always out of town,” he said finally, voice quieter now. “Work trips… or, I think that’s what they do.” He gave a short, humorless chuckle, but there was no real amusement behind it. “I don’t really know. They don’t tell me much.”

 

Uzi just stared at him for a moment, processing what he’d said. She hadn’t expected that. Not from him.

 

N was always so upbeat, so unfailingly kind. She had just assumed that meant he had a supportive family—parents who were just as warm as he was. But now? She wasn’t sure what to think.

 

Her mind briefly flicked to her own dad. He might’ve been distant, buried in his work, but at least he acknowledged her existence every once in a while. Even then, she still resented him for how little he seemed to care, and she knew, whether she wanted to admit it or not, that her frustrations with him bled into the way she treated others. The way she didn’t care what drones thought about her, how blunt she was, even rude. She had just… stopped caring.

 

But N? If his parents ignored him just as much—maybe even more—then how was he so nice? How could someone who grew up with so little attention still be so open, so kind to everyone around him? It didn’t make sense. And for some reason, that realization made something uneasy settle in her chest.

 

Uzi hesitated for a moment before speaking again, her voice softer this time. “Then… who takes care of you?” She didn’t mean it as an insult or an accusation—just an honest question laced with genuine curiosity and an underlying sense of concern. The thought of him just… being alone made something in her chest twist uncomfortably.

 

N froze for a beat, his fingers tightening slightly around the fabric of his sleeve. He dropped his gaze, his usual brightness dimming into something more distant. When he finally answered, his voice was quieter than before, almost like he was pulling the words from a place he didn’t often visit.

 

“No one, really.” He swallowed, shifting slightly where he sat. “I mean… my grandma used to take care of me when I was younger.” There was something almost wistful in his tone, but beneath it was a weight that hadn’t been there a moment ago—something heavier, something deeply stricken. “She was always there for me. Made sure I was okay. But… she passed away a few years ago.” His voice faltered just slightly at the end, and for a moment, he didn’t say anything else.

 

Uzi didn’t respond immediately. She wasn’t sure what to say.

 

But then N straightened up a little, forcing a small, almost sheepish smile onto his face. “It’s fine, though! I’ve just been doing everything myself since then.” He gave a small, dismissive shrug, as if trying to make it seem like it wasn’t a big deal. “I’m working really hard in school right now. Keeping my grades up, trying to get into a good college.”

 

He paused, glancing away, then mumbled something barely audible under his breath.

 

Uzi barely caught it, but she heard it.

 

“Maybe then they’ll notice me.”

 

The words were spoken so quietly, as if he hadn’t meant to say them out loud at all. He kept his gaze lowered, his fingers idly picking at his hands.

 

Uzi didn’t know what to say to that. There was an ache in her chest that she couldn’t quite describe, an anger she couldn’t quite place. It wasn’t fair. None of this was fair.

 

Uzi struggled to find the right words. She knew she should probably say something comforting, something reassuring—but the problem was, she wasn’t exactly good at that. In fact, she sucked at it.

 

She cringed internally at the thought of past attempts to console friends when they were upset. Usually, she’d either blurt out something unintentionally awkward and pitying or just… stand there like an idiot, completely useless. Emotional support was not her strong suit. It never had been.

 

And yet, here she was, faced with N—someone who was always so cheerful, so bright—now looking more vulnerable than she’d ever seen him. And for once, she actually wanted to do something about it.

 

Uzi hesitated, exhaling sharply through her nose. She couldn’t believe she was about to do this.

 

Slowly, almost uncertainly, she reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder. It was a bit awkward at first, but she lightly brushed her thumb in a small, soothing motion, hoping it came across as reassuring rather than weird.

 

What the hell am I doing? she thought. But she didn’t pull away.

 

Instead, she just said the first thing that came to mind. “Hey… I’m proud of you.” Her voice was softer than usual, lacking its usual sarcasm or bite. “I see how hard you work. Like, genuinely. You could’ve just given up, but you didn’t.” She let out a short, self-deprecating laugh. “Meanwhile, I’m dealing with a similar situation and barely keeping my head above water. Honestly? I wish I had even half of your determination.”

 

For a moment, N didn’t react. He had been staring down at his hands, avoiding eye contact, but at her words, his head lifted. His eyes locked onto hers, wide with something she couldn’t quite place.

 

“Really?” His voice was quiet, but there was no sarcasm, no disbelief—just a raw, almost hesitant sincerity, like he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to believe her. Like no one had ever said that to him before.

 

Uzi felt something tighten in her chest.

 

She gave a small nod, her expression steady despite the uncertainty bubbling inside her. She wasn’t exactly used to this kind of sincerity, but she held his gaze, refusing to look away in fear of making things awkward.

 

Then, to her surprise, N reached out, his hand gently resting on top of hers. His touch was light, almost hesitant, as though he wasn’t sure if this was okay. His fingers curled slightly, not gripping but grounding, as if he wanted to hold onto the moment for just a second longer.

 

His voice was soft, barely above a whisper. “Thanks… I really appreciate that. A lot.”

 

Uzi didn’t move. She wasn’t sure she even could. The weight of the moment settled between them—quiet, fragile, and far too real for her comfort.

 

And then, all at once, it hit her.

 

She got the ick.

 

A sudden wave of secondhand embarrassment, an overwhelming awareness of what she had just done.

 

What was she doing? Since when did she comfort others like this? Since when did she—did she hold hands?

 

Panic shot through her, and before she could stop herself, she yanked her hand back as if she had just touched a hot stove.

 

“Oh, uh—” The words tumbled out in a flurry. “I—sorry, I didn’t mean to be weird. That was weird, wasn’t it? Yeah, that was definitely weird.” She rubbed the back of her head, staring determinedly at the floor, feeling the heat rise to her face.

 

N blinked, startled for a moment before quickly waving his hands. “No, no, it’s fine! I didn’t think it was weird at all.” He gave a reassuring smile, his tone warm and genuine, trying to ease whatever internal crisis she was having.

 

Uzi wasn’t convinced. The awkwardness clawed at her like an itch she had to scratch, and she desperately needed an escape. Without thinking, she grabbed her phone and checked the time.

 

Oh. Perfect. A distraction.

 

“It’s been almost an hour since the lights shut off,” she announced, her voice slightly strained as she latched onto the change in subject.

 

N, sensing her need to move on, nodded immediately, slipping back into his usual self. “Right. Guess that means it’s time to go.”

 

Uzi cleared her throat, regaining her composure, and stood up, grabbing her bag. N followed suit, adjusting the strap of his own bag over his shoulder.

 

And just like that, the moment was gone.

 

Now, they had something more important to focus on.

 

The crime scene awaited.

 

Notes:

Yuhhh we’re finally getting somewhere

Js u wait for the next chapters, I really like the way they turned out

Also, did u like the backstory I came up with for N? Cuz obviously he doesn’t have parents or anything, but in the AU ig he does, cuz like it’s a normal society. He wasn’t sent by JC Jensen to kill drones, he has an actual family and stuff yk, like all the other characters

And I feel like this would make sense in a way - cuz like I feel like he’s really insecure, even if he doesn’t act like it at all. He’s like, someone who’s good at hiding it yk. He’s not pretending to be happy all the time, don’t get me wrong, cuz he’s genuinely caring and innocent. He js has his own issues, also like everyone else. Ig that would be considered a headcannon, or like characterization for this AU. It’s valid though, right? It js adds so much depth to his character in my opinion.

Also LMAO Uzi’s attempt at comforting him going horribly wrong, in her eyes at least 💀

She def seems like someone who would be terrible at comforting people - idk if I’m js projecting but like, whenever someone’s crying next to me or whatever I’m just kind of there like what 😭 The difference is though when someone’s upset, I wanna js be there to listen, cuz yk not everyone needs advice, they js need someone to talk to or vent. But I feel like Uzi is straight up awkward and had absolutely no idea what to do if someone’s crying by her, so she’s gonna try her best, even if unintentionally she makes it worse, in a way 💀 that’s another headcannon ig

OK that’s all I have to say, posting the next chapter tomorrow 🤭

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 23: Ambush

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The school halls were eerily silent as Uzi and N navigated through the darkness. The only light came from the full moon outside, its silvery glow occasionally spilling through the tall windows, casting long shadows across the floor. The stillness of the building made every footstep sound louder than it should have, and the weight of what they were about to do settled heavily in the air between them.

 

They moved quickly yet cautiously, the anticipation growing with each turn they took. Finally, they reached their destination.

 

The crime scene stood before them, cordoned off with bright yellow tape stretched tightly across the door and surrounding area. The bold black letters screamed DO NOT CROSS , serving as an obvious warning, but neither of them had any intention of following it. The scene felt frozen in time, untouched since whatever incident had taken place.

 

Uzi exhaled quietly, her eyes locked on the door. “We made it,” she muttered under her breath.

 

She should’ve felt triumphant, but instead, a gnawing uncertainty crept up her spine. She hadn’t exactly thought this far ahead. It was one thing to want to investigate, but another thing entirely to actually do it. Where was she supposed to start? What was she even looking for? A clue? Evidence? Did drones just know how to investigate crime scenes, or was she just making this up as she went?

 

N, standing beside her, leaned in slightly and whispered, “So… do we just go in and check it out?” His voice was barely audible, but there was an unmistakable eagerness to it.

 

Uzi nodded, forcing confidence into her expression. “Yeah.”

 

She did not admit that she had absolutely no plan.

 

Without another word, they stepped over the tape, careful not to disturb anything too much. The caution signs supporting the tape wobbled slightly but remained standing. As they reached the door, Uzi hesitated. She didn’t want to just rip the tape down—that felt reckless, like it would leave behind too much evidence of their intrusion.

 

Instead, she slowly peeled the section wrapped around the handle and the doorframe, wincing as the adhesive made a faint peeling sound in the silence. Once it was loose enough, she carefully eased the door open.

 

A weight settled in her stomach, an anxious pit forming as she braced herself for whatever was inside. Oil? A destroyed room? Some kind of horrific scene? She had no idea what to expect.

 

But when the door creaked open just enough to see inside—

 

Nothing.

 

Just pure, suffocating darkness.

 

Uzi blinked, her eyes straining against the void. She couldn’t see a single thing.

 

Beside her, N frowned, equally perplexed. He glanced at her, lowering his voice. “Uh… so what now? We can’t exactly turn the lights on. That’d be kinda obvious.”

 

Uzi pressed her lips into a thin line, contemplating their next move.

 

Uzi reached into her backpack without a word, her fingers blindly rummaging through its contents until they closed around exactly what she was looking for. A flashlight.

 

She had thrown it in last minute that morning before school, just in case. It was one of those random thoughts she had—what if I need this later? —and for once, that instinct had paid off.

 

She pulled it out, holding it up as she smirked.

 

N raised a brow, impressed. “That was smart.”

 

Uzi’s smirk widened, tilting her head slightly. “I know.”

 

Without another word, she clicked the flashlight on.

 

The beam of light cut through the darkness instantly, illuminating the small, confined space in front of them.

 

The closet was a disaster.

 

Minimal effort had been made to clean up whatever had happened here. The most jarring thing was the deep black stains smeared across the wall, unmistakably dried oil. It wasn’t just splattered randomly—it was concentrated in a single area, staining the wall in a way that suggested someone had been sitting there, leaning against it before slowly sliding down. The trail of dried oil told the story of that slow descent.

 

On the floor, beneath the stain, was a small, darkened puddle. Long since dried, but still deeply unsettling.

 

And then there was the mess. The shelves, which had likely once been neatly stocked with cleaning supplies, were in complete disarray. Bottles, cleaning rags, and brooms littered the floor, mixed with toilet paper rolls and overturned boxes. It looked less like a crime scene and more like a place where someone had fought desperately, or where chaos had erupted all at once.

 

Uzi swallowed, suppressing a sharp inhale. Beside her, N had lifted a hand to his mouth, eyes wide. His fingers trembled slightly, caught between shock and disgust.

 

Trying to steady herself, Uzi adjusted her grip on the flashlight and carefully moved the beam around, searching the scene for anything else.

 

Uzi exhaled slowly, her breath steady but laced with unease. Her eyes flickered across the scene, taking it all in.

 

“This…” she started, her voice quiet but firm, “this wasn’t quick. There was a struggle.” She gestured toward the scattered supplies and the oil stains on the wall. “Whoever the victim was, they fought back. And then—” she hesitated, processing the gruesome details before continuing, “—they were thrown against the wall before they were killed.”

 

N swallowed hard, his hands fidgeting slightly as he took another uneasy glance around the room.

 

Uzi frowned. Something still wasn’t adding up. The articles had said it wasn’t a normal murder—it wasn’t a stabbing, and it wasn’t a shooting. It was something far worse.

 

Her eyes darkened as she muttered, “It’s like… they were mauled.” She turned to N, watching his expression shift. “By something.”

 

N tensed, his nervous energy palpable. “Y-Yeah,” he said, his voice slightly shaky. “That’s what it looks like.”

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes slightly, thoughts racing. “But why? What was the motive?”

 

N hesitated at that, his brows furrowing as if he was debating something internally. His fingers tapped anxiously against his leg before he finally spoke. “I think—”

 

But before he could finish, a sharp sound cut through the silence.

 

Footsteps.

 

Fast, deliberate, and coming from just outside the closet.

 

N’s words died in his throat, his entire body going rigid as his head snapped toward the noise. Uzi felt her stomach drop, her grip tightening around the flashlight as adrenaline spiked through her circuits.

 

Someone was here.

 

Uzi whipped around, her grip tightening on the flashlight as she quickly swept its beam across the dark hallway. Her heart pounded, but her voice remained steady, controlled.

 

“If someone’s out there,” she said lowly, her tone sharp with warning, “you better not be messing with us.” Her eyes darted between the dimly lit corners, trying to catch even the slightest movement.

 

N had turned fully as well, his posture stiff, his eyes wide as he scanned the hallway. He leaned slightly toward Uzi, whispering frantically, “I really think we should leave. Now.”

 

Uzi didn’t argue—she didn’t need to. She nodded once, but there was a catch. They couldn’t just bolt and leave the crime scene looking like someone had been snooping around. That would be reckless.

 

“We can’t just run,” she muttered quickly, shifting slightly closer to N as she explained. “I have to put everything back exactly how we found it—the tape, the door—everything.”

 

N swallowed hard, his jaw tightening as he processed her words. He exhaled through his nose, his nervous energy clear, but he gave a firm nod. “Okay. I’ll watch your back. Just be fast.”

 

Uzi barely acknowledged his response as she turned back to the closet, her hands moving swiftly but carefully. Every second felt agonizingly long. They needed to get out of here—now.

 

With meticulous precision, Uzi pressed the door shut, careful not to make a sound. The tape had lost some of its adhesive from when she had peeled it off earlier, so she worked slowly, smoothing it back into place as best as she could. Every movement felt agonizingly slow, her fingers deliberate as she ensured nothing looked out of place—if someone noticed even the slightest difference, it could raise suspicion.

 

As she worked, the silence settled heavily around them. No more footsteps. No movement. No indication that anyone else was there. It gnawed at her, making her second-guess what they’d heard earlier. Maybe their nerves were just getting to them? Paranoia had a way of twisting reality, making every shadow seem sinister, every distant sound feel closer than it really was. Besides, who would even be here this late? A security guard, at most—but even then, if someone had truly rushed past them, it couldn’t have been a guard. They wouldn’t be sneaking around.

 

Finally, the last piece of tape was back in place. Uzi took a small step back, inspecting her work before exhaling softly. She turned to N and gave him a quick nod. “Alright. Let’s go,” she whispered.

 

N, who had been keeping watch, instantly fell into step with her as they silently maneuvered back over the caution tape. He shot her a glance, his expression still laced with unease, but he didn’t say anything. Uzi didn’t either. They both knew lingering here any longer wasn’t an option.

 

As they moved swiftly through the dimly lit hallway, their steps fell in sync, quick but controlled—there was no need to run, not yet. The silence between them was thick, but N eventually broke it, his voice low and uncertain.

 

"Do you know where the exit is?" he asked, glancing sideways at Uzi.

 

She nodded without hesitation. "Yeah. End of the hall, to the right."

 

N gave a small nod of acknowledgment but didn’t say anything more. He trusted her.

 

Uzi had made sure of this part of the plan. Even before she figured out all the details, she knew they needed a reliable escape route. She had scouted this exit in advance, slipping through it the previous day just to make sure it wasn’t locked. It functioned like an emergency exit, but there were no signs above it to indicate that. That had irritated her at the time—what kind of school didn’t bother labeling an emergency exit? It was reckless, another sign of the place’s carelessness. She shook off the thought. That wasn’t important right now. All that mattered was getting out.

 

Their footsteps echoed softly as they moved through the darkened hallways. They had been walking for about a minute now—almost at their destination. The only downside was that the exit was on the complete opposite side of the school, forcing them to navigate a long stretch of empty corridors. Still, they had made it this far without any trouble.

 

Gradually, their pace slowed. The initial tension that had driven them forward began to ease, and they allowed themselves to relax, if only slightly.

 

Uzi glanced at N, her voice quieter now, almost casual. “You think we were just being paranoid? Maybe it was just a mouse or something.”

 

N gave a slight shrug, but his expression remained uncertain. “Maybe. But we should still hurry. Just in case.”

 

At this point, their guard was slipping. Uzi supposed it made sense—whatever had spooked them earlier was probably nothing. With that thought, her mind drifted back to what they had uncovered. She started mentally piecing things together, running through ideas for her next move. More research was the obvious step. She needed to look deeper into the school itself—its history, any other incidents, anything that might connect the dots. There had to be more out there, more than just vague news reports.

 

Just as Uzi’s guard had nearly faded, the sound of hurried footsteps echoed behind them—quick, fleeting, like someone had just sprinted past.

 

Both she and N instinctively froze, their bodies tensing as they snapped their heads over their shoulders. The hallway behind them was shrouded in darkness, empty at first glance, but something about it felt off.

 

“You heard that, right?” Uzi asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

 

“Yeah,” N responded immediately, his tone edged with anxiety. His eyes darted around, searching for movement.

 

Just as they were about to turn forward again, a sudden noise—like something heavy shifting—broke the silence. Before either of them could react, a shadowy figure dropped from the ceiling with a dull thud, landing in the middle of the hallway.

 

The dim lighting barely revealed anything, the darkness concealing the figure’s face and features, but Uzi could tell one thing—it wasn’t an animal, but looked like… Another drone? Maybe. But whoever it was, she had no intention of sticking around to find out.

 

“Run,” N said urgently, and without hesitation, they both took off sprinting toward the exit.

 

Their footsteps pounded against the floor, nearly drowned out by the rapid, relentless steps closing in behind them. Uzi’s chest tightened, panic clawing at her insides as adrenaline surged through her. Whoever—or whatever—was chasing them was gaining.

 

Her thoughts raced just as fast as her feet. What the hell do they want? If this was just some random person, why had they come out of nowhere? And why were they chasing them? Nothing about this was normal.

 

The exit was just ahead. A sharp turn to the right, and they’d be free. Almost there—

 

Before she could make it, something heavy crashed into her from behind.

 

A sharp gasp was ripped from her throat as she was forced to the ground, her body slamming against the cold floor. A sharp, stinging pain flared in her shoulder as something—claws?—dug into her, pinning her down. Uzi grimaced, gritting her teeth as she struggled beneath the weight of her attacker.

 

Her gaze snapped up, and her breath hitched. She couldn’t make out their face clearly, but there was no mistaking the grin. A wide, unnatural smile, baring teeth that were eerily sharp. The dim lighting cast eerie shadows over their features, making the expression even more unsettling.

 

Her heart pounded harder as she saw them raise their other hand—or more accurately, a set of gleaming, razor-sharp claws—high above her, poised to strike.

 

Uzi braced herself, squeezing her eyes shut, struggling against their grip but knowing she wouldn’t be able to stop them. She waited for the inevitable—

 

Then, a voice rang out.

 

“Stop!” N’s voice, loud and desperate, cut through the moment like a blade.

 

Uzi hadn’t expected it to do anything. But to her shock, the attacker hesitated. Their grip slackened for just a second as they turned their head, distracted.

Notes:

How was that?

Who (or what) do you think the attacker is? 🫢

I wanna hear theories 😫

Next chapter will be posted tomorrow, so stay tuned! 🤭

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 24: Twist

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

It wasn’t much. But it was enough.

 

The weight pressing down on Uzi vanished in an instant. She barely had time to register what had happened before she saw N tackle the attacker, yanking them off of her with surprising force.

 

Uzi instinctively clutched her shoulder, wincing as pain flared through it. Her fingers came away wet—she didn’t even need to look to know it was oil. Her mind barely had the chance to process that before she glanced up—and what she saw made her breath catch.

 

N had the attacker pinned against the wall, his arm pressing firmly against their neck. But that wasn’t what shocked her the most. His hands—his fingers—weren’t normal anymore. They had sharpened into deadly, gleaming claws. What the hell?

 

The attacker glared at N, their voice dripping with fury as they spat out his name. “What the hell do you think you’re doing, N?”

 

Uzi’s mind reeled. They know each other?

 

N didn’t waver. His claws remained at the attacker’s throat as he met their gaze with an unwavering, almost unreadable expression. “I told you to stop, V.” His voice was low, firm.

 

The attacker—V—narrowed her eyes, her lips curling into a sneer. “You’re no fun,” she scoffed, her voice filled with disdain.

 

Before Uzi could react, V suddenly lashed out, her claws slashing across N’s face in one swift, merciless strike.

 

N recoiled, staggering backward with a sharp gasp, his hands immediately flying to his face as he crumpled to the ground. Uzi could see thin streaks of oil starting to drip between his fingers.

 

V stood over him, her expression twisted in disgust. “I never liked you anyway,” she muttered. “You always got in the way.”

 

With that, she turned on her heel and sprinted off, her laughter echoing down the dark hallway as she disappeared into the shadows. Within seconds, she was gone.

 

Uzi’s breath hitched as she stumbled forward, pushing through the pain in her shoulder. “N!” she called, her voice urgent. She barely had time to process what had just happened—her mind was still reeling, adrenaline rushing through her. She had to make sure he was okay.

 

She moved to help him, but the moment she reached out, a sharp, searing pain shot through her shoulder. A hiss escaped her, and she instinctively clutched at the wound, her fingers pressing into the slick oil seeping from the gash. She grimaced, her posture stiffening, but she forced herself to refocus.

 

Meanwhile, N was still on the ground, eerily still. His eyes—usually so expressive—seemed distant, unfocused, as if his mind had been yanked into another time entirely. The only movement was his hand lifting to his face, smearing away the streaks of oil running down his cheek. He stared at it, his fingers trembling slightly, as if seeing it for the first time.

 

“N?” Uzi called again, her voice sharper this time, laced with something close to panic.

 

N flinched, like he’d just been shaken out of a trance. His eyes snapped back to her, and just like that, he was himself again—his usual warmth and concern flooding back. He scrambled to his feet, eyes scanning her frantically. “Are you okay?” His voice was urgent, thick with worry.

 

Uzi recoiled.

 

Something inside her twisted, anger bubbling up and overtaking the lingering fear. She clenched her jaw, her fingers tightening around her injured shoulder. If N had known something about this all along—if he knew what was going on—why hadn’t he said anything?

 

She scowled, her glare sharp enough to cut through metal. “Obviously not!” she snapped, her voice unsteady, a tremor betraying the emotion welling in her chest. “What’s wrong with you?! Why—” Her throat tightened, but she pushed through it. “Why have you been lying to me this whole time?”

 

Her vision blurred for a second—whether from pain, frustration, or the sting of tears threatening to fall, she wasn’t sure. All she knew was that she wanted answers.

 

Uzi noticed the slight flinch in N’s posture as her words hit him. For a brief moment, his expression softened, eyes briefly flickering with what looked like hurt, but it was gone before she could fully process it. He quickly steadied himself, his usual calm returning to his features as he exhaled sharply. His voice, though slightly shaky, was still quiet and measured as he spoke, each word carefully chosen.

 

“I promise... I’ll explain, Uzi. Just, please… calm down for now,” N said, his hands raised slightly in a gesture of appeasement. His tone was gentle, almost pleading, as he tried to ease the tension in the air, though it was clear he was still shaken by her outburst.

 

Uzi’s frustration only grew. Her jaw clenched, and her eyes narrowed in anger. She took a step back, arms crossing defensively over her chest. “Calm down? Why the hell should I calm down?” Her voice was sharp, her words biting. “For all I know, you’ve been lying to me this entire time. Maybe you’ve been planning to kill me, for all I know.”

 

The accusation hung in the air, heavy with suspicion. Uzi’s mind was racing, her heart pounding. She couldn’t understand why N had kept so many secrets from her, why everything felt so off now. She had trusted him—hell, she’d even started to rely on him. But now… now it felt like that trust had been shattered, and the pieces were too complicated to put back together.

 

N’s shoulders tensed, his eyes darting around the hallway, but his voice remained steady, even though it held an edge of urgency. “Uzi… listen, there could still be other drones in the building. We need to move before someone hears us,” he said, his words firm but quiet, his gaze flickering nervously at the surrounding darkness. Despite the tension in his tone, his posture wasn’t threatening, but he was clearly on edge.

 

Uzi glanced at him, irritation still bubbling within her, but the sense of danger in his voice caught her attention. She wanted to snap back, to push him further, but the thought of staying here any longer made her uneasy. There was too much unknown, and her instincts were telling her to get the hell out. She didn’t say anything, but the silence between them carried a thousand unspoken thoughts as she reluctantly nodded, not trusting her voice just yet.

 

With that, the two of them headed for the door. Ironically, it was only a few feet away - just within arms reach, even. Uzi’s realization of this only made her more annoyed.

 

Yet, she felt an immense sense of relief at the thought that she’d finally be out of this hell hole.

Notes:

Wowowoowwo

What a shocking turn of events 🫢

Gonna post another chapter today cuz I’m feeling generous :3

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 25: Debrief

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

As Uzi and N stepped through the door, a cool gust of night air greeted them. Uzi’s gaze immediately lifted to the sky, where the full moon hung high, its pale light filtering through shifting clouds. The beams of the moon were intermittent, obscured by the thick, slow-moving clouds, casting a strange, shifting glow over the landscape. The world felt quiet—eerily so—but the weight of the night and their escape still pressed on Uzi’s shoulders.

 

She glanced over at N, her mind a whirlwind of confusion and anger. Her words came out short and clipped. “What do we do now?”

 

N rubbed the wound on his cheek absentmindedly, the motion slow and careful, almost as if he were trying to ground himself. After a moment, he spoke, his voice soft. “We could go to my car,” he suggested. “We need a minute to gather ourselves.”

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes, her wariness still lingering like a cloud around her. Her voice took on a sharp, challenging tone. “You better not be planning anything, N. I swear.”

 

N exhaled slowly, as if the weight of the night was catching up to him. He didn’t react with frustration, though; instead, his tone softened slightly, tinged with fatigue. “I’m not planning anything, Uzi,” he assured her, his words slow but genuine. “I promise.”

 

There was no edge to his voice, no defensiveness, just a tired sincerity that made Uzi pause for a moment. She didn’t entirely trust him yet, but for now, the quiet moonlight seemed to ease the tension, just a little.

 

Uzi’s footsteps were slow and heavy as she walked beside N, the silence between them stretched thin and uncomfortable. Every part of her was tense, filled with frustration and a growing sense of confusion. She wasn’t sure what to make of anything anymore. She couldn’t shake the image of V’s wild grin and sharp claws, or the disturbing thought that V had likely killed that student. Her heart pounded in her chest. What if that could’ve been her? What if N hadn’t intervened in time? The thought made her shiver involuntarily. She wasn’t sure if it was from the cold or from fear.

 

The more she thought about V, the stranger it all seemed. What reason did she have to kill? It didn’t make sense. And then there were the claws... and her teeth. They weren’t just sharp, they looked unnatural— almost animalistic. Uzi’s mind swirled as she tried to make sense of it all, but every theory felt even more ridiculous than the last. It was like something out of a horror show—something impossible.

 

Uzi couldn’t stop herself from glancing at N out of the corner of her eye. Something was off with him, too. His behavior earlier had been... strange. He wasn’t acting like himself. The claws she had seen in the dark—they weren’t just a hallucination, right? She didn’t want to believe it, but the more she thought about it, the more she questioned what she had really seen. And now, as they walked side by side, his hands looked... normal. There were no claws. Her head felt dizzy as her thoughts spiraled further into confusion. Could she have imagined it all? Maybe she was just exhausted, or maybe the stress was getting to her.

 

The overwhelming weight of everything pressing down on her made her feel lightheaded. Was she even seeing things correctly anymore? The sensation of dizziness worsened, and Uzi could feel her vision beginning to blur at the edges. She tried to focus, but the dark spots in her sight kept growing. Her heartbeat quickened in panic as she stumbled slightly, the world feeling like it was slipping from her grasp.

 

“Uzi!” N’s voice cut through the haze of her thoughts, sounding frantic and sharp. His hand reached out, but the last thing Uzi heard before the world went black was his desperate call of her name.

 

The darkness swallowed her whole, and she collapsed into unconsciousness.

 

-

 

Uzi slowly blinked her eyes open, the dim light inside a car casting an unnatural, almost eerie glow over her surroundings. The world around her felt hazy, and her head throbbed with a dull ache that refused to subside. It took her a moment to adjust to the faint illumination, and only then did she realize where she was. Her gaze shifted, the familiar interior of N’s car coming into focus. The sleek dashboard, the leather seats, everything felt oddly comforting in its familiarity, but she couldn’t shake the knot in her stomach.

 

The events of the night rushed back to her in a flash—V’s savage attack, N’s strange behavior, the panic, the dizziness. A cold, panicked breath caught in her chest, and she quickly turned her head to her side, her eyes darting to the driver's seat. There he was—N, sitting quietly, absorbed in his phone. He wasn’t driving, though. Uzi could tell by the way the car was stationary that they were parked.

 

Before the panic could overwhelm her, N looked up from his screen, noticing the shift in her movement. His gaze immediately softened, and a trace of concern crossed his features. "You awake?" he asked, his voice laced with worry. “How do you feel?”

 

Uzi grimaced, feeling the weight of exhaustion settle into her bones. Her head pounded, and her body felt heavy, like she had just run a marathon in her sleep. She barely registered the question before her mind snapped back to more pressing matters. She couldn’t just sit here. She had to know what happened.

 

“Where… where are we?” Uzi’s voice was rough, and her throat burned slightly as she tried to sit up straighter. She could still feel the aftermath of everything that had gone wrong. She didn’t even wait for him to answer, her mind already racing. “What happened? Why am I here?”

 

N sighed softly, setting his phone down. He looked at her, his eyes a mix of exhaustion and concern, before answering, "You passed out. From oil loss, probably." His tone was calm, but there was a hint of something unsaid in the way he spoke, like there was something else he wanted to say.

 

Uzi’s hand instinctively went to her shoulder, and the sharp twinge of pain reminded her of the wound she had gotten earlier. She winced as she felt the bandaged area. The discomfort was undeniable, but something was different. Her arm wasn’t just injured; it was wrapped in clean, careful bandages. Her eyes flickered to N, and she felt a knot form in her stomach.

 

She looked at him, narrowing her gaze. “Did you do this?” Her tone was cautious, her suspicion obvious.

 

N met her gaze with a soft nod. "Yeah," he said, his voice steady but low,"I didn’t want it getting worse." He didn’t move much, but there was a quiet sincerity in his words that made Uzi pause for a moment. Despite the tension, he had taken care of her. The gesture, however small, didn’t erase everything she was still trying to process, but it made her thoughts falter for a second.

 

Uzi’s expression hardened as she continued to search his face for any sign of something more—something she hadn’t figured out yet. Her mind was too clouded, too full of questions to let go of her doubts, but his actions kept poking at the edge of her thoughts.

 

Before Uzi could muster another word, N reached down into the cup holder embedded in the side of the car door, grabbing a water bottle. He pulled it out smoothly, twisting the cap off with ease before holding it out to her. "You should drink something," he said gently, his voice unexpectedly soft. "Stay hydrated."

 

Uzi’s gaze lingered on the water bottle, her eyes narrowing as she contemplated her options. She could easily refuse it, or better yet, grab it and throw at him, but the dry, parched feeling in her throat overpowered her pride. The exhaustion gnawed at her, making it hard to resist. She glared at him, but the thirst was too strong to ignore. Without a word, she snatched the bottle from his hand and began drinking in long, desperate gulps, still keeping an eye on him through narrowed eyes, her guard firmly in place.

 

The cool water flowed down her throat, soothing the raw dryness, but it didn’t erase the anger or confusion festering in her chest. She kept her gaze trained on N, her hand gripping the bottle a little too tightly as if ready to throw it if things turned sour.

 

When she finally pulled the bottle away, her mouth slick with the water, she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. Her eyes flicked back at N again, and a glare settled on her face, sharp and unwavering. Her mind raced, but she refused to let go of her suspicions.

 

He didn’t seem intimidated by her glare—if anything, he looked even more concerned, a trace of unease passing over his features. That only irritated her more.

 

“You gonna tell me everything, or what?” Uzi’s voice came out blunt, the edge of frustration clear. She wasn’t going to let him dance around it any longer. Not now, not after everything.

 

N blinked, caught off guard for a moment, as if her words had taken him by surprise. His face softened as he seemingly processed the anger in her tone and the way she held herself. He nodded slowly, then exhaled, his shoulders sagging with a quiet sigh. “I promised I will,” he said, his words measured and deliberate, though there was an air of hesitation. “I just… I need to explain.”

 

He offered her a faint, half-hearted smile, but it faltered almost immediately under the weight of her glare. Uzi didn’t even respond to the attempt. She just scoffed, clearly unamused by the gesture.

 

Her arms crossed, her posture stiff as she waited for him to finally break down whatever wall he was holding up.

 

N spoke cautiously, his words slipping out with a nervous edge. "I... I guess I should’ve told you sooner," he began, his hands fidgeting uncomfortably in his lap. "But... me, V, and J—we’re disassembly drones."

Notes:

Oh em geee finally this is being brought up 😩

Ik it probably js seemed like he was completely ‘normal’, like everyone else obvi, but if u read the tags for my story I said som abt how they’re basically vampires but like there’s more too it 😭

I would explain it more, but pretty much everything will be clarified in the next chapter, and also I’m probably gonna write some author's notes on it obvi 🙄🤚

NEXT CHAPTER IS BEING POSTED TOMORROW see yall then 🤭

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 26: Discovery

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi's brow furrowed, her face contorting with confusion. She blinked a few times, unsure if she had heard him right. "Disassembly drones?" she echoed, skeptical, clearly taken off guard. "What does that even mean?"

 

N exhaled sharply, clearly uncomfortable as he shifted in his seat. “We’re like… normal drones, really,” he began, his voice hesitant. "But to survive, we need to consume oil. Other drones’ oil." He looked up at her as if waiting for her to catch on, but Uzi’s expression only became more confused.

 

She paused, her lips twisting into a wry, unamused grin. "So, let me get this straight," she said, raising an eyebrow. "You’re basically saying you’re a vampire, but instead of calling it that, you’ve gone with ‘disassembly drones’?“

 

N shifted uncomfortably in his seat, his eyes downcast, clearly sheepish. He nodded slowly, almost reluctantly. "Kind of," he muttered, glancing up at her. "But it’s still... different." His voice trailed off, as if he wasn’t quite sure how to explain the rest of it.

 

Uzi studied his face, and despite the frustration she felt, a trace of curiosity lingered. "Who came up with that name? That sounds tacky." she asked, unamused yet still incredulous.

 

He let out a small, awkward chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck. "I didn’t pick it," he said quickly. "Honestly, I don’t know where it came from." His expression softened, but there was still something unsettled in the way he spoke, as if the whole situation was just as bizarre to him as it was to her.

 

Uzi’s questioning tone didn’t waver as she pressed him further. "Okay, but how is that any different from a vampire?" she asked, her curiosity beginning to show, though her annoyance still lingered.

 

N paused for a moment, his brow furrowing as he tried to formulate an answer. "Well, I guess we do have some differences," he muttered, though it didn’t sound like he believed it entirely himself. Then, without thinking, he held out his hand. "Like this," he said. In an instant, his hands changed into razor-sharp metal claws. The sound of them scraping faintly against the air made Uzi flinch back in her seat, eyes wide.

 

"Put that away!" Uzi snapped, her voice sharp and annoyed, a slight tremor in her tone as she instinctively recoiled. "What the hell, N?"

 

N’s eyes widened at her reaction, and immediately, he apologized profusely, his face flushed with embarrassment. "Sorry, sorry! I didn’t mean to freak you out!" With a hurried motion, he closed his hand into a fist, and the claws retracted, his hand returning to its normal state.

 

Uzi took a few calming breaths, still a bit shaken, but her eyes were now narrowed in exasperation. N gave her a moment, then cautiously continued. "We also have enhanced hearing and sight," he said, his voice tentative. "Night vision, better athletic abilities, quicker healing. Stuff like that."

 

Uzi tilted her head slightly, intrigued despite herself. "So, basically you just described a vampire," she said, dryly.

 

N chuckled sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah, I guess," he muttered, his voice uncertain. "But, uh, still—I didn’t come up with the name," he added quickly, as if that somehow made everything less strange.

 

A heavy silence settled between them, thick with unspoken words. Uzi’s mind raced, trying to piece together everything she had just learned. There were so many questions fighting for space in her head, but when she tried to form them into actual words, they all tangled together into a mess of confusion. The thought crossed her mind—maybe she should just leave. Just get out of the car, take the bus home, and pretend this night had never happened. Maybe even pretend N had never happened.

 

Everything felt different now. Like the floor had been ripped out from under her, and she was left floundering in freefall. How was she supposed to trust him after this? He had been hiding so much. For all she knew, this could still be a trick. A game. Maybe she was just another meal, and this was all some elaborate way to lull her into a false sense of security.

 

But then, amidst the whirlwind of paranoia and uncertainty, a single thought surfaced. One that made her hesitate.

 

She swallowed, her fingers curling into the fabric of her hoodie as she finally broke the silence. "...Why did you save me?" Her voice was quieter than she expected, but the weight behind her words was anything but.

 

N blinked, taken aback by the question.

 

"You could’ve just let V kill me," Uzi continued, her tone hardening. "Would’ve been easy. No fighting, no getting involved. But you didn’t. Why?" She hesitated, eyes narrowing slightly. "Or are you just saving me for later?"

 

The question came out harsher than she intended, but she didn’t take it back. She needed to know.

 

N’s expression faltered as he searched for the right words. He looked almost... hurt. Like the thought of her believing that actually stung. After a moment, he exhaled, shoulders slumping slightly.

 

"Because you’re my friend, Uzi." His voice was quiet but certain. "I couldn’t just... stand there and let that happen to you. I wouldn’t.” His he glanced down at his hands, fidgeting with them in his lap. His tone lowered slightly,"...I care about you, Uzi… a lot."

 

Uzi didn’t know how to respond to that. She felt something in her chest tighten—a warmth she wasn’t expecting. She quickly shoved it down, refusing to acknowledge it.

 

She should be angry. Suspicious. She was suspicious. But now, tangled somewhere in all of that was something else. Something she wasn’t ready to name.

 

Before Uzi could even think of what to say next, N suddenly spoke up, his voice softer than before. “Can I… tell you something?”

 

The way he said it—almost like he was asking for permission—caught Uzi off guard. Since when did N ever sound so hesitant? The way he looked at her, almost as if he was bracing himself for her reaction, made it even weirder.

 

Uzi scoffed, keeping her arms crossed. “Yeah, sure. Whatever.” She was still trying to act mad, still trying to hold onto the anger from before. But if she was being honest with herself… she didn’t feel as angry anymore. At least, not at him. Not that she’d ever admit that.

 

N took in a slow breath before continuing. “I don’t know what’s gonna happen now.” His voice was unusually quiet, most likely still processing everything himself. “V and I… we’re really close. We basically grew up together, y’know? And, um…” He hesitated, rubbing the back of his neck. “I liked her. A lot. I’ve wanted to tell her for a while now, but I didn’t know how.”

 

Uzi blinked, not expecting that. She vaguely recalled the look on his face when V had turned on him—the raw, unfiltered hurt in his expression when she lashed out.

 

N swallowed hard, his voice lowering. “But back there… when I—” He shook his head, like he didn’t want to say threatened her out loud. “When I stood up to her, she just—” He instinctively brought his hand up to his face, gentle rubbing the scratched,“She told me she never liked me. That I always got in the way.”

 

Uzi frowned, the words replaying in her head. She remembered the way V had sneered at him, her voice dripping with venom when she said it.

 

N let out a shaky sigh. “I think she might try to kill me now.” He brought his hand back down to his lap, interlocking his fingers. “And if she tells J about this, it’ll be even worse. J would definitely make sure of it.”

 

His voice grew even quieter. “…And even worse than that… they might come after you, too.” He turned to Uzi, his expression deadly serious. “Because now you know about us.”

 

Uzi completely blanked, her mind stalling as she tried to process everything N had just said.

 

N? Having a crush on V? The idea alone made her head spin. She never would’ve guessed it—not in a million years. V was harsh, unfiltered, and completely unapologetic about it. And N… N was the opposite. He was polite, caring, and oddly sentimental, especially for a guy. Heck, he seemed like he’d probably be the romantic type.

 

Uzi suddenly stiffened.

 

That sounded familiar. Way too familiar.

 

A horrible thought formed in her mind, one she almost didn’t want to acknowledge. But before she could stop herself, she hesitated and asked, "Did you ever, uh… write letters to V and put them in her locker?"

 

N blinked at her, clearly caught off guard. “Huh?” He tilted his head slightly, looking genuinely confused. “Wait—how do you know about that?”

 

Uzi’s stomach dropped.

 

It was him.

 

It had to have been.

 

He was the one who had written those letters—those letters. The ones Uzi had found in her locker, addressed to V. The ones she had read, the ones that had been so ridiculously heartfelt it almost made her feel sick. The ones V hadn’t even cared about when Uzi tried to return them.

 

She still had one of them. The second letter. It was crumpled into a ball, stuffed away in the back of a drawer. She hadn’t been able to throw it away, though she never really knew why.

 

N, still oblivious to her realization, looked at her expectantly.

 

Uzi swallowed, then admitted, “Because… I was the one who got them.”

 

N’s confusion deepened, his brow furrowing—until suddenly, the realization hit him like a truck. His entire posture stiffened, his eyes widening. And then, just as quickly, his expression shifted into pure embarrassment.

 

“Oh,” he mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck. His voice dropped to a sheepish mutter. “Oh no.”

 

Uzi watched as he grimaced, as if just now understanding the full weight of what had happened.

 

“Wow, uh—sorry you saw that.” He winced, clearly flustered. “I, um—I really thought that was V’s locker…”

 

N let out a nervous laugh, rubbing his arm as he fumbled for the right words. “Yeah, uh… wow. That’s… really embarrassing.” His voice trailed off into an awkward chuckle. “I mean, seriously, I’m so sorry you had to read all that. I never meant for—”

 

“N, it’s fine.”

 

Uzi didn’t mean to interrupt him, but she couldn’t let him keep spiraling like this. Her voice came out sharper than she expected, but she quickly looked away, her face heating up.

 

What was she even doing?

 

She crossed her arms, trying to play it off like this wasn’t a big deal. “I mean, yeah, they were really cheesy,” she muttered. “But… I kinda liked them.”

 

The second the words left her mouth, she regretted them.

 

There was a long, awkward silence.

 

N just blanked. His mouth opened slightly, but no words came out. He stared at her like she had just spoken in an entirely different language.

 

Uzi groaned internally. Great. What if he thought she liked him like that.

 

“I—uh—” N stammered, blinking rapidly. “Wait, what?”

 

Uzi forced herself to keep going, even as her stomach twisted with secondhand embarrassment. “I mean, not like that,” she clarified quickly, waving her hand as if to push the words away. “Just— I dunno. I never would’ve guessed you wrote them.” She hesitated, then added under her breath, “Or that they were about V.”

 

N was still staring at her like his brain had short-circuited.

 

Uzi sighed, rubbing the side of her head. “I just don’t get it. How could you have liked her?” She glanced at him, searching his expression for some kind of explanation. “Like, seriously. You? And V?

 

N’s gaze dropped to his hands, his fingers fidgeting slightly against the fabric of his sleeves. His voice was quieter when he spoke again, like he was trying to piece together something that no longer fit.

 

“She wasn’t always like this,” he murmured. “V… she’s different when you really know her.” His brows furrowed, as if searching for the right words. “I mean, yeah, she’s always been… intense, but before, it wasn’t like—” He stopped himself, exhaling sharply. “I don’t know. It’s hard to explain.”

 

Uzi didn’t say anything, just watching him carefully.

 

N hesitated before continuing, his voice carrying something bitter, something almost resentful. “It was when she met J. That’s when things changed.” His jaw tensed. “After that, it was like she didn’t even care anymore. Like none of it mattered.” He shook his head, forcing out a small, hollow laugh. “But I guess that never stopped me from caring about her, anyway…

 

His words hung in the air, the weight of them settling between them like something unspoken.

 

Uzi sat still, the questions swirling in her mind, but none of them seemed to bring any satisfaction. She thought that knowing why whoever had written the letters to V would have somehow brought some sense of closure, a way to finally understand the confusion that had gnawed at her for so long. But instead, now knowing that it was N—it only left her with more questions, a deep, unsettling emptiness in her chest. It wasn’t relief. It was... something else. A sense of loss, maybe? She didn’t know.

 

Her gaze shifted to N, who was lost in thought, and Uzi quickly pushed her feelings aside. She couldn’t keep sitting in this uncomfortable silence, so she shifted gears, her voice slightly more abrupt as she spoke.

 

“So, how’d you even become a disassembly drone, anyway?” she asked, the words almost slipping out before she could stop herself. It was one of the questions that had been on her mind since this conversation started, and right now, it seemed like a good way to get away from the heavy weight of V’s memory.

 

N looked up, staring off into the distance for a moment, his eyes slightly unfocused as if trying to pull the words from some distant place. He sighed, the sound heavy with years of memories that seemed to weigh him down.

 

“I wasn’t always like this…” he started, his voice uncharacteristically quiet. “When I was younger, I was attacked by one of them—one of the disassembly drones.” His fingers twitched slightly at the memory, but he didn’t seem to notice. “It wasn’t something I wanted. I didn’t choose  to be this way. But once it happened, there wasn’t much I could do to stop it.”

 

Uzi stayed silent, her eyes narrowed in thought. There was a certain sorrow in his voice, something far older than anything she had expected to hear from him. She couldn’t help but feel a little sympathy for him, even though it felt strange.

 

But then, the curiosity resurfaced, and she asked the next logical question. “But if that’s how it works, how did V become one too?” She leaned slightly forward, her eyes still fixed on him, trying to gauge his reaction.

 

N’s expression softened, his lips pressing together as though the question was one he had asked himself many times. He seemed reluctant to answer, the corners of his mouth pulling into a faint frown.

 

“That’s a bit of a different story…” he began, his voice uncertain, before he glanced back at Uzi. “I don’t really know the full story. All I know is, V... she didn’t have the same kind of accident that I did. She was turned, I guess.” He paused, his gaze drifting again. “Maybe she was born that way? I don’t know the details. But... yeah, she’s one of them too.”

 

Uzi absorbed his words, her eyes still locked on his. She couldn’t shake the feeling that N wasn’t telling her everything, but his discomfort was clear. His shoulders were tense, his lips pressed tight, as if he were holding something back.

 

N took a slow breath before continuing, his tone reflective as he thought back to the beginning. "When I first met V," he began, his voice soft, "I didn’t know what she was. I didn’t know about... any of this." He shifted slightly, his hands fidgeting in his lap as if the memories were weighing on him more than he let on. "But once we both figured out we were... the same, I guess, we kind of started bonding over it. Over everything, really. It was nice to know there was someone else who understood what we were going through."

 

Uzi listened carefully, her mind swirling with everything he was saying. There was so much that didn’t make sense, but for some reason, she found herself wanting to trust him. Maybe it was the way he spoke so genuinely, or maybe it was just because she had no other choice but to go along with this strange, new reality he was revealing to her.

 

Then, a question slipped out, one that had been hovering in her mind for a while. "What about J?" she asked, her voice tinged with suspicion. "Is she one too?"

 

She’d picked up on the way N had mentioned J earlier, and it seemed like he was implying something, but she needed confirmation. She couldn’t afford to be in the dark any longer.

 

N paused, his eyes darting to the side for a moment, and then he nodded, a reluctant acceptance in his gaze. "Yeah, J’s one too." His voice was quieter now, as if he was trying to soften the weight of his words. "We’re the only ones I know of, though."

 

Uzi felt a strange mix of confusion and wariness flood through her. J, too? So they were all... this way. All of them. But that only raised more questions. How many others were there? How deep did this go? She couldn’t shake the unease gnawing at her stomach.

 

“So, is there anyone else?” she asked, her voice careful as she studied N’s expression.

 

N shrugged slightly, the movement casual, but there was a certain wariness in his eyes. "No, just us three," he answered. "At least, that’s all I know about. Could be more out there, but I’m not sure."

 

Uzi sat back, her eyes narrowing slightly. She wanted to push more, to question him further, but for the moment, his answer made sense. She didn’t get the feeling that he was lying to her—at least, not about this. Still, the idea of there being others lurking out there, hidden in the shadows, unsettled her.

 

Her mind was still trying to process it all, trying to piece together a puzzle that felt like it was missing too many pieces. But for now, she let it go. At least she had the answers she needed—for now.

 

"Okay," Uzi muttered under her breath, her eyes flickering away from N for a moment. She didn’t quite know what to think anymore, but she tried to push the doubt aside. She’d take N at his word. For now.

 

N noticed the shift in her, and for the first time in a bit, there was a tentative smile tugging at his lips. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to make Uzi’s eyes flick back to him.

 

"Thanks," he said quietly, almost sheepish. "For listening. I know this... this isn’t easy to hear."

 

Uzi crossed her arms tightly, leaning back slightly as she stared at N. She tried to appear unaffected, like the same old, irritated Uzi, but something was different now. She felt that familiar pressure in her chest again, the one that made her heart race in a way she didn't want to acknowledge. She pouted and muttered, "It's whatever," her voice a little softer than intended. Her attempt to keep the distance between them didn’t feel as convincing as before.

 

Then, trying to regain some semblance of control, she added with more force, "I’m the one that’s supposed to be asking questions, remember?" Her words weren’t as sharp as she wanted them to be.

 

The truth was, Uzi didn’t feel as angry as she thought she would. She wanted to hold onto the fury she’d built up, the betrayal. But something about the way N was looking at her now, his expressions open and maybe even a little vulnerable, made it harder to keep the act up. She couldn’t remember the last time someone had looked at her like that.

 

But no. She wasn’t going to let him off the hook just yet. She had to be mad. She should be mad. Her thoughts churned, but none of it made sense. Her head felt so mixed up, like one moment she was boiling with frustration and the next, she was questioning if it was all worth holding onto.

 

N, on the other hand, didn’t seem hurt or offended. Instead, his expression was… calmer. A little relieved, maybe? Maybe even a little content. His shoulders had relaxed slightly, and he had this small, almost hesitant smile.

 

Uzi’s chest tightened. No. No way. She wasn’t going to let him read her so easily. She wasn’t going to let him see how much his apology, or his words, or even just him being here, were starting to chip away at her walls. She gritted her teeth and focused on the last bit of anger she could muster, but the thought of him catching onto her weakness gnawed at her, and she pushed it down hard.

 

She wasn’t ready to admit anything. Not yet.

Notes:

FINALLY IT’S BEEN REVEALED

That N was the one who wrote the letters

Who would’ve guessed? 😭

It’s so funny to me though that like, it was completely unintentional that he put them in Uzi’s locker. He probably had wondered for a while what happened to them, then eventually forgot yk 💀

And also, I love how Uzi kept the second one cuz she felt too bad abt throwing it away. And like, js hates to admit *anything* and *everything* abt her feelings, she’s so stubborn omfg 😭

It’s like, she can’t even admit to herself that she’s not even mad at N either, or that she appreciates that he saved her life. This girl -

A lot more things will be explained soon on, so js hold on a little longer guys 😭🤚 esp within the next few chapters.

Oh and kind of but not at all off topic, but like I literally couldn’t think of anything better than to just call them disassembly drones tbh. In this AU, I think I mentioned before but like, they obviously weren't made js to kill drones, and they’re basically vampires but a bit different. More abt that will be explained too in the upcoming chapters I swear 😭

OH and also, if anyone has a better idea at what to call them and I like it, I will literally go back and change all of the times I used that word to wtv sounds better, and I’ll credit the person too. I don’t wanna call them vampires but also don’t wanna call them disassembly drones, yk? But if I can’t think of anything else ig it’s js gonna stay like that, it makes enough sense but personally I don’t really like it, but I’m completely stumped.

OK looking forward to posting the next chapters :3 also may write more notes on this one, I js forgot what else I had to say

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 27: Drive

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi glanced at the time on her phone, the glowing digits nearly making her groan. It was almost midnight. She wasn’t just physically drained; her mind felt like it was about to short-circuit. As much as she was ready to just disappear and bury herself in sleep, she couldn’t bring herself to leave without saying something to N. Not after everything that had happened.

 

She cleared her throat, trying to shake the exhaustion from her voice, and told him, “I should probably head out. It's late.”

 

Her smile was stiff, forced—she wasn’t quite ready to leave things unsaid but didn’t know how to fix it either. As she opened the car door, though, N stopped her, his voice softer this time.

 

“Wait,” he said, hesitation lingering in the air. “How are you getting home?”

 

Uzi paused, looking at him over her shoulder with a raised brow. “Bus. I’ll be fine.”

 

Before she could take another step, N spoke again. “I can drive you,” he offered, sounding somewhat reluctant. “It’s probably safer, anyway.”

 

Uzi eyed him carefully, suspicion knitting her brow. While part of her still bristled at the thought of him being too close after everything that had happened, she couldn’t ignore the point he made. The bus at this hour wasn’t exactly the safest choice.

 

With a heavy sigh, she gave in. “Fine. But if you’re planning anything, I swear—”

 

“I’m not planning anything,” N said, shaking his head with an expression of mild exasperation. He looked genuinely annoyed at her doubt, but there was no edge to it, just exhaustion.

 

Uzi didn’t know whether to believe him or not, but she said nothing more. Instead, she slid back into the passenger seat, glancing out the window, trying to push down the uneasy feeling that still lingered.

 

N started the car, the engine humming to life as he drove them out of the parking lot. The low sound of the tires against the road was the only noise in the air, the silence stretching between them like an unspoken barrier. Uzi gave him her address when he asked, her voice quiet, just enough to break the stillness. But beyond that, neither of them said anything.

 

The drive was long. At least, it felt that way to Uzi. The minutes seemed to drag on endlessly, every second weighed down by the silence and the swirling thoughts in her head. Twenty minutes felt like a lifetime. She stared out the window, eyes unfocused, her mind still trying to piece everything together—N, V, whatever the hell disassembly drones were, and all the things she hadn’t asked him yet. The more she thought about it, the more overwhelming it became.

 

It wasn’t until she noticed her reflection in the glass that her attention was pulled away. Her face looked tired, the exhaustion clear in the dark circles under her eyes. But what really caught her attention was the bandage on her arm. The injury from earlier—the deep, painful scratch from V's claws—came rushing back to her. A shiver ran down her spine, and she instinctively winced at the memory. She reached up with her other hand, her fingers brushing softly over the bandage.

 

As her fingers grazed the wrap, she realized something that stopped her. It was done with care—neat, precise, like someone who knew what they were doing. Someone who took their time to make sure it was right. It wasn’t just a hurried, thrown-together job. It was deliberate, thoughtful. She glanced at N, but he was focused on the road, his expression unreadable.

 

For a moment, she just sat there, letting the silence wrap around her again. It was strange—how could she feel so calm and unsettled at the same time?

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed slightly as she glanced at N. She couldn’t help but ask, her voice laced with curiosity but edged with skepticism, “…Why did you even bother bandaging my arm?” She then muttered under her breath, “And why the hell do you have bandages in your car anyway?”

 

N took a quick glance at her, as though caught slightly off guard by the question. “Well,” he began, “I didn’t want you to keep losing oil.” He paused, giving a small shrug. “I had to do something about it. Plus, I keep a medical kit in here. You never know when something could come up.”

 

Uzi raised an eyebrow, intrigued. She let out a small, almost amused scoff, but not with any malice. It was more like she found it oddly fitting. “Of course you do,” she muttered, shaking her head slightly.

 

It wasn’t like she was upset by it—more like she had to admit it suited him. Of course N, of all drones, would have a med kit in his car.

 

Uzi felt the words almost slip out—thank you. She caught herself, though, and swallowed the impulse. She wasn’t sure why it felt so difficult to express gratitude, especially for something as simple as a bandage, but she just couldn’t bring herself to say it. Maybe it was the situation, or maybe she was just too conflicted with everything happening.

 

Her eyes drifted to N’s face as he drove, her mind still racing. But something caught her attention—his face. The marks, the scratches that had been there only a short while ago, were gone. Not even a trace of oil. It was like nothing had ever happened.

 

Confused, Uzi blurted out, “How is your face already healed?” Her voice was laced with disbelief, her mind trying to piece together what she was seeing.

 

N glanced over at her, unfazed, and offered a simple reply. “I heal really fast. I think I mentioned that earlier.”

 

Uzi blinked, still processing. He said it like it was the most casual thing in the world. As if rapid healing was something every drone could do, like it wasn’t at all strange. She couldn’t wrap her mind around it.

 

The car slowly rumbled to a stop, the gentle bump as it rolled into the driveway familiar to Uzi. The moment the car ceased moving, a small sense of relief washed over her, as if the distance between the chaos and her home was finally closing in. She hadn’t realized how much tension had been building up until now, but now that they were here, it felt like she could exhale for the first time.

 

“We’re here,” N’s voice cut through the stillness, the words simple but carrying an undercurrent of something Uzi couldn’t quite place.

 

She nodded, relief seeping through her circuits. Without a word, Uzi opened the car door a little too quickly, as if she couldn’t get away fast enough. She stepped out, the cool night air immediately greeting her skin. But as her hand moved to close the door, she caught the reflection of N in the car window. His gaze was fixed on her, a somber expression etched across his face.

 

A strange feeling stirred deep in her chest, something she couldn’t identify. It wasn’t anger, and it wasn’t quite sympathy either. Uzi tried to convince herself it was just that—a fleeting moment of empathy for the mess he was in, but it felt more complicated than that. She brushed it off, not wanting to delve deeper into whatever it was.

 

Instead of slamming the door behind her, she paused, looking back at N. For a moment, she hesitated, before speaking. “Thanks… for saving me,” she muttered, the words reluctant but sincere. She didn’t think she’d ever say it, but the gratitude was there—she couldn’t deny it.

 

N’s expression softened, just the faintest of smiles playing at his lips. It wasn’t much, but it made something inside Uzi warm in spite of herself.

 

“I’m just glad you’re okay,” he replied, his voice quieter, as though he wasn’t sure how to respond to her admission.

 

She bit her lip and nodded. “I owe you one.”

 

N gave a small nod, a quiet acknowledgment of her words. “No need to worry about it. Just—take care of yourself, alright?”

 

Uzi felt a shift in the air, something unspoken, before she turned toward the door. She hesitated again, her hand on the car door, feeling the weight of the moment.

 

“Goodbye, Uzi.” N spoke lowly, almost as if he was speaking aloud to himself.

 

Uzi answered, her tone soft, almost reluctant. “Bye.”

 

With a final glance at him, she closed the door gently, the soft click of it echoing in the still night. She turned toward her front door, her hand already reaching for the handle, but she didn’t look back. The silence of the night wrapped around her like a heavy blanket.

 

As she entered the house, the door shutting softly behind her, Uzi finally allowed herself to exhale fully, the weight of the evening settling in.

Notes:

Ofc N would have a whole ass medical kit in his car. He seems like someone with the mentality of “It’s better to be over prepared than underprepared 🤓☝️”

That’s a valid headcannon, right? 😭🤚

LMAO anyways see u in the next chapter, posting it today as well.

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 28: Murky

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The night had been a blur of exhaustion, a haze that seemed to blanket Uzi the moment her head hit the pillow. She hadn’t even bothered to change out of her clothes before collapsing into bed. By the time she hit the sheets, the weariness had overtaken her entirely. She didn’t remember closing her eyes; one moment, she was still processing the events of the night, and the next, sleep had claimed her.

 

When the morning arrived, it did so with a vengeance. The sunlight sliced through the thin gap in the blinds, casting sharp beams that stabbed directly into her face. Uzi groaned in irritation, pulling her pillow over her head in a half-hearted attempt to block out the intrusive light. It didn’t work.

 

She rolled over, burrowing deeper into the warmth of her blanket, her body still craving the comfort of sleep. A slight headache throbbed at her temples, and she groggily reached up to rub her face. Her eyelids felt heavy—too heavy to keep open. She wanted nothing more than to drift back into the quiet, dreamless oblivion of sleep.

 

As she shifted lazily, her eyes landed on the clock beside her bed. The numbers blinked back at her in a quiet, almost mocking rhythm: 1:34 PM. Uzi blinked, momentarily surprised that it was so late, but the thought barely registered. She didn’t care. Not now. She hadn’t gotten enough rest, and her body screamed for more.

 

Without much thought, Uzi let out a deep sigh and sank further into the mattress, her limbs feeling like lead. She closed her eyes again, her mind flickering between awareness and the pull of sleep, desperately trying to hold onto the rest she still craved. The world outside seemed so far away, and she longed to return to that soft, blissful nothingness.

 

-

 

Uzi jolted awake, a sharp gasp tearing from her throat as if she had just surfaced from drowning. Her chest heaved, her breaths shallow and unsteady. Her entire frame felt tense, like she had just woken from a fall that never ended. A strange chill clung to her, feeling like she had been drenched in cold sweat.

 

Her mind raced, grasping for fragments of the dream that had startled her awake. A nightmare. She knew that much. But of what? The details were murky, slipping away the harder she tried to remember. Shadows, a creeping sense of dread—something had terrified her enough to rip her from sleep, but she couldn’t recall what. That was somehow worse.

 

Letting out a tired, frustrated sigh, she rubbed her eyes with the heels of her hands, trying to shake off the lingering unease. The dream didn’t matter. It was just a dream. That’s what she told herself, anyway. But the tight knot in her chest refused to ease.

 

She exhaled heavily and let herself fall back against the pillow, hands covering her face for a brief moment before dropping limply to her sides. Staring blankly at the ceiling, she tried to process everything—the events of last night, the confusing emotions swirling inside her, and now, whatever this was. Her mind felt like a tangled mess of thoughts she didn’t have the energy to sort through.

 

After what felt like forever, Uzi sucked in a slow breath, steeling herself. She didn’t want to get up, but staying in bed wouldn’t change anything. Begrudgingly, she forced herself to move, throwing off the blanket and swinging her legs over the side of the bed. The cold air against her frame made her shiver slightly.

 

With a tired groan, she pushed herself up and trudged toward the bathroom.

 

Uzi stopped in front of the mirror, gripping the edge of the sink as she took in her reflection. She looked awful. Her usually sharp, messy hair was even more disheveled than usual, sticking up in random places like she had been through a wind tunnel. Her eyes were dull, heavy with exhaustion, and framed by dark smudges that only made her look more drained. She felt gross, like she hadn’t properly cleaned herself in days, even though she knew that wasn’t true. The events of last night still clung to her like a layer of grime, weighing her down.

 

With a tired sigh, she turned the faucet on, letting the cold water rush over her hand for a moment before cupping it and splashing it onto her face. The chill sent a small jolt through her system, waking her up slightly. As she blinked the excess water away, she noticed the way the water swirling down the drain looked murky at first before clearing up. Probably just dried oil from last night. At least she was getting it off now. The thought didn’t bring much comfort, though.

 

Not wanting to dwell on it, Uzi grabbed her toothbrush and quickly ran through her routine, brushing her teeth with little care for how hastily she was doing it. She just wanted to get it over with. After rinsing her mouth, she reached for a hairbrush and worked through the knots in her hair, wincing as the bristles caught on particularly stubborn tangles. Eventually, she managed to get it to look somewhat presentable—not perfect, but she didn’t care enough to try harder.

 

She glanced at her reflection again and forced a smile, testing how it looked. It didn’t suit her. The expression fell almost immediately, replaced by a frown as she heard the unmistakable sound of her stomach growling. Great. Not only did she still feel like crap, but now she was starving too.

 

Uzi stepped back into her room, her eyes landing on her nightstand. Her alarm clock’s glowing red numbers read 2:31 PM. She rolled her eyes, unimpressed with herself. Sleeping in this late was nothing new, but it was still kind of ridiculous. Not that she cared enough to actually do anything about it.

 

Without thinking, her hand reached for her phone, fingers instinctively wrapping around the device. She turned it on and, out of habit, lazily scrolled through her social media feeds. Nothing interesting. Just the usual mix of pointless drama and memes. She switched over to her DMs, skimming through them with mild disinterest. As expected, Thad had spammed her with a bunch of dumb videos. Stuff like drones slipping on ice or weird conspiracy theories about Copper-9’s government being run by “lizard-drones”. She would never admit to him that some of them were actually kind of funny. But right now? She didn’t have the energy to watch them.

 

With a sigh, she backed out and tapped on her messages. The second she did, a strange, uncomfortable feeling settled in her stomach. N had messaged her.

 

She hesitated, staring at his name on the screen, her thumb hovering over the conversation. She wasn’t sure why this made her so tense—maybe because last night still didn’t feel entirely real, like some weird dream she hadn’t fully processed yet.

 

Finally, she forced herself to open the message. She hadn’t known what to expect, but the second she saw what he sent, she couldn’t help but smirk slightly.

 

N [10:45 AM]: Hey Uzi, are you awake?

 

That was so him. She could even imagine how he’d say it—probably way too enthusiastically for such a simple message. Uzi let out a small breath of amusement as she remembered their conversation about how he was a morning drone. She still didn’t get it. Who actually liked mornings? She hated them. But that was beside the point.

 

Uzi’s eyes drifted down to the second message, her curiosity piqued.

 

N [1:26 PM]:  Just checking in. Are you okay? How’s your shoulder? Does it still hurt?

 

She blinked at the screen, caught off guard. She had completely forgotten about the wound—hadn’t even thought to check on it since waking up. Instinctively, she glanced down at her shoulder, her fingers lightly brushing over the bandages. A dull ache pulsed beneath the layers of gauze, a reminder of what had happened the night before. The thought of peeling it back to see what was underneath made her wince. Yeah… not dealing with that right now.

 

But then, another thought crept in—something different. Something weird. Not in a bad way, though.

 

She stared at N’s messages, re-reading them once, twice. He was worried. About her. That wasn’t something she was used to. Most of the time, it felt like she was just there—just some drone existing in the background, with no one really giving much thought to how she was feeling. But here was N, checking in on her, making sure she was okay. And the way he worded it—it wasn’t just polite concern. It was genuine. Like he actually cared.

 

Uzi shifted uncomfortably as a strange, twisting sensation coiled in her stomach. She wanted to blame it on hunger, but she knew better. Her face felt warmer than it should, and she quickly shook her head, pushing the feeling away. Nope. Not dealing with that right now. She had enough on her plate already.

 

For a moment, she debated whether she should even respond. But before she could talk herself out of it, her fingers were already typing.

 

Uzi [2:34 PM]: im up now

 

Almost the second Uzi sent her message, the familiar three-dot typing bubble appeared at the bottom of the screen.

 


N [2:34 PM]: Oh hey!! Glad you’re up! How are you feeling?

 

She stared at his message for a second, hesitating. That was fast.

 

Maybe he had just happened to be on his phone at the exact moment she texted. Or maybe… he had been waiting. The thought sent an uneasy flutter through her chest—something she wasn’t in the mood to unpack right now. Instead, she quickly shook it off and typed out a simple response.

 

Uzi [2:35 PM]: fine

 

She hovered over the send button for a second before tapping it. She hoped it didn’t come off as dismissive, but there wasn’t much she could do about it now. She just… wasn’t sure how to respond to him. Or to this.

 

N’s reply came just as quickly as before.

 

N [2:35 PM]: That’s good!! I’m really glad you’re okay :)

 

Before she could even think of something to say back, another message popped up.

 

N [2:36 PM]: Make sure you drink lots of water and eat something, okay?? And rest up too, so you can heal faster!!

 

Uzi stared at the message longer than she probably should have. It wasn’t like he was ordering her to take care of herself—there was no nagging, no bossy tone. Just genuine concern.

 

She could feel warmth creeping up her neck, and she quickly looked away from her phone, exhaling through her nose. Why does he have to be like this?

 

Shoving whatever that feeling was aside, she typed out a short response.

 

Uzi [2:37 PM]: ok

 

The second she sent it, she groaned internally. Wow. Riveting conversation skills, Uzi.

 

She wasn’t trying to be cold, but what was she even supposed to say to all of this? No one had ever checked in on her like this before, or at least not in a long time. She wasn’t used to it. It made her feel… weird. Not bad. Just—weird. And she had no idea what to do with that.

 

Uzi stared at her phone, debating whether to just put it away and move on with her day. Part of her wanted to—after all, the conversation seemed to have reached its natural end. But another part nagged at her, telling her that after how dry her responses had been, she should at least say something more.

 

He was just being nice, she reasoned. The least I can do is ask him how he’s doing.

 

With that thought, she quickly typed out a message.

 

Uzi [2:39 PM]: how abt u? u good?

 

It didn’t take long for N to reply.

 

N [2:40 PM]: Yep!! i’m doing fine :D Thanks for asking!!

 

Even through text, his response had a certain energy to it—like he genuinely meant it, like he was happy she had asked at all. Uzi felt the corners of her mouth tug upward before she caught herself and quickly schooled her expression. What am I doing?

 

As she mulled over her own reaction, she noticed the familiar typing bubble appear at the bottom of the screen. But before she could see what he was about to say, it vanished.

 

Maybe he had decided that was the end of the conversation.

 

With a small shrug, she was about to shove her phone into her pocket when it suddenly buzzed in her hand. She blinked down at the screen.

 

N [2:42 PM]: By the way, I need to talk to you about something. It’s important.

 

Uzi’s stomach twisted uncomfortably. What?

 

Her fingers hovered over the keyboard for a second before she sent a simple response.

 

Uzi [2:43 PM]: when?

 

N’s reply came almost instantly.

 

N [2:43 PM]: Next time I see you face to face. Probably at school.

 

Her stomach dropped. That was… unsettlingly vague.

 

Uzi exhaled slowly, then gave his message a thumbs-up before locking her phone and shoving it into her pocket. She ran a hand down her face, trying to shake the uneasy feeling creeping into her chest.

 

What could be so important that he couldn’t just text it?

 

Her mind raced with possibilities, but none of them gave her any comfort. Whatever it was, she’d have to wait until school to find out.

 

Uzi let out a slow, heavy sigh, dragging her hand down her face as if that would somehow wipe away the uneasy feeling settling in her chest. Whatever. It’s probably nothing. She told herself that, but her gut refused to let it go.

 

Shaking her head, she turned away from her nightstand and made her way to the door, stepping out into the hallway. Her movements felt sluggish, like her body was still catching up from the exhaustion of last night. She was too tired to think too deeply about… whatever that conversation with N had been. Right now, she just needed food.

 

Cereal, probably, she thought absently. It was easy, it didn’t require much effort, and right now, that was all she could really handle. She barely had the energy to think, let alone cook anything. Besides, she wasn’t even sure if she was actually hungry or if she just needed to eat something.

 

As she padded down the hall toward the kitchen, she tried to push aside the nagging thoughts about N, about what he could possibly want to tell her. It could wait. Right now, she just needed to eat.

 

-

 

Now that she had eaten and spent some time out of her room, Uzi felt a little more like herself—less sluggish, less weighed down by whatever weird emotions had been gnawing at her all day. But as she stood in the middle of her room, she glanced down at herself and sighed. She hadn’t even bothered to change clothes since yesterday.

 

Without wasting much more thought on it, she headed to her dresser, pulling open a drawer and rummaging through it until she found something comfortable—an oversized grey hoodie and a pair of black pajama pants patterned with little skulls. Perfect. With her clothes in hand, she made her way to the bathroom, shutting the door behind her before placing them on the sink.

 

Catching sight of her reflection, she hesitated. She knew she needed to take off her bandage, but something about seeing what was underneath made her pause. It’s just a scratch,  she reminded herself, but the memory of how she got it still made her shoulders tense.

 

Taking a slow breath, she began unwrapping the bandage, careful not to rush. It was surprisingly easy to remove, probably because of how neatly it had been wrapped in the first place. She briefly thought about that—how N had taken the time to make sure it was done properly. Typical, she mused, shaking her head slightly.

 

Once the last of the bandage came off, her eyes flickered down to her zip-up hoodie. Jagged scratch marks ran through the fabric, the material torn from where V’s claws had sunk in. Great. That was just another thing she had to deal with. She made a mental note to sew the layer later before tugging it off and tossing it onto the floor.

 

Beneath it, she had been wearing a graphic tank top, and now she could clearly see her shoulder. The dried oil smeared across the wound made her grimace. She needed to wash it off. At least it doesn’t hurt as much anymore. That was the only good thing she could say about it.

 

Letting out a quiet sigh, she turned on the faucet.

 

Uzi leaned over the sink, turning the faucet on and letting the cold water rush over her hand for a moment before she cupped it and splashed it onto her shoulder. A dull sting accompanied the sensation, but it was nothing compared to what she had expected. Murky water, darkened by the dried oil that had clung to her wound, swirled down the drain. She kept rinsing it, running her fingers gently over the scratches to help clear away the last remnants, until the water ran clean.

 

Finally, she straightened, taking a good look at the wound now that it was fully visible. Her eyes widened. The scratches—jagged and deep the last time she’d seen them—were nearly gone. Instead of the torn, messy gashes she had braced herself for, all that remained were faint marks, like an old scrape that was already in its final stages of healing.

Notes:

I couldn’t think of a better way to say “morning person” so I js put “morning drone.” Idk if that even confused anyone but might as say something yk

I wonder what N has to tell Uzi 🤔 ((I say this as if I don’t know))

I loved writing all the details of Uzi js going abt her daily routine kinda stuff - but in this specific instance, she feels like shit the whole time 😭

I debated on whether I should make her like, go take a shower ig cuz like, tbh if I was in her shoes that would’ve been the first thing I did when I woke up. But I feel like, for one, she probably js doesn’t have the motivation at that point in time, and two, the ending part of this is like, extremely important, when she sees her wound (this will be explained in the next chapter 🫢) and like if she took a shower she probably wouldn’t have even noticed until she got out. So I js thought it was unnecessary yk, and js writing this like this is way better.

And one more thing - LMAO I love how dry of a texter Uzi is 😭🤚 it’s like she physically cannot help it. And then N is js being polite and using proper grammar and stuff 💔🥀
I feel like, if someone knew her really personally (like probably Thad ig) she’s better at messaging him, but at this point she hasn’t texted N all that much tbh.

Oh yeah and also I thought it’d be funny to make Thad that one friend who spams you Instagram reels or all day 😭 Then Uzi will reply to like 2 of them and Thad won’t really give a fuck and will js send her more videos 💀

That’s all I had to say - posting the next chapter tomorrow!!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 29: Discontent

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

She blinked. Then rubbed her eyes. What…? That couldn’t be right. There’s no way. Tentatively, she reached up and pressed her fingers against the wound. It was tender, sure, but barely. If anything, it felt more like a bruise than anything serious. How was this even possible? She had only gotten the injury yesterday. It should still be raw, painful, not… this.

 

A sense of unease crawled up her spine as she racked her brain for any logical explanation. Had she healed fast before? No, that had never been a thing. She wasn’t a disassembly drone—she didn’t have any sort of advanced regeneration like them. This wasn’t normal.

 

Then, another thought crept into her mind. N. Could he have had something to do with this? But how? It wasn’t like ‘vampires’ had some kind of healing power… right? At least, she didn’t think they did. And even if they did, why would it affect her? Unless—

 

Her breath hitched slightly as a new, more unsettling thought surfaced. Swallowing, she hesitantly glanced at her reflection and pulled down the collar of her tank top just enough to check her neck. Smooth, unmarked metal. No bite.

 

She let out a quiet sigh, relieved—but still unnerved. She hadn’t been… turned or anything. If she had, wouldn’t she be craving oil by now? Wouldn’t she feel different?

 

Pushing the thought aside, she exhaled sharply and shook her head. She wasn’t going to spiral over this. Not now. But still, no matter how much she tried to dismiss it, a nagging feeling remained at the back of her mind. Something about this wasn’t right.

 

Uzi’s first instinct was to message N and demand an explanation. He had to know something. Without wasting another second, she yanked her phone from her pocket, navigated straight to her messages, and hastily typed out a text.

 

Uzi: [3:38]: why is my wound already healed? did u do something?

 

She hit send and stared at the screen, watching for the typing indicator. It appeared after a few moments, those three little dots flickering in and out as N formulated his response. But unlike before, he was taking longer this time. That alone made her uneasy.

 

Finally, his reply came through.

 

N [3:39 PM]: I’ll explain when I can talk to you in person.

 

 

Uzi’s fingers tightened around her phone. Seriously? That was not the answer she wanted. Her irritation flared as she quickly fired back a response, her frustration evident in her typing.

 

Uzi [3:39 PM]: Why cant u js tell me now? why r u being so difficult?

 

Another pause. It was shorter this time, but still long enough to make her feel like he was hesitating. Then his reply came through.

 

N [3:39 PM]: I’m sorry, Uzi. I just can’t.

 

That was it. That was all he gave her. No real answer, no further explanation—just an apology that did nothing to satisfy her growing frustration. Her grip on the phone tightened for a moment before she let out a sharp breath and shut it off, setting it down on the bathroom counter with more force than necessary.

 

She needed a second to cool off before she responded again. Her mind was racing, irritation mixing with something more unsettling. Why couldn’t he just tell her? The way he was avoiding the question only made her more suspicious. It wasn’t like N to keep secrets—or at least, she had thought it wasn’t.

 

Crossing her arms, she stared at her reflection in the mirror, jaw clenched. She would get answers. Whether N liked it or not.

 

Uzi exhaled sharply, forcing herself to push her frustration to the side. Getting worked up wasn’t going to do her any good right now. She needed to reset—clear her mind, even if just a little.

 

She turned away from the counter and peeled off her old clothes, barely sparing the torn hoodie another glance before letting it drop to the floor. Reaching for the fresh set of pajamas she had placed on the counter earlier, she pulled on the oversized hoodie and the familiar black pajama pants patterned with skulls. The soft fabric was a welcomed change, but it didn’t do much to ease the tight knot of emotions in her chest.

 

With one last glance at herself in the mirror—messy hair, tired eyes, a scowl that wouldn’t quite leave—she grabbed her phone and exited the bathroom.

 

Back in her room, she flopped onto her bed, sinking into the soft warmth of her blankets. For a moment, she just lay there, staring blankly at the ceiling, trying to let the comfort of her bed lull her into a calmer state of mind.

 

Her gaze shifted to the side, scanning the assortment of stuffed animals scattered along her bed. Most were the same ones that had always been there, but one in particular caught her attention—the small, purple cat plush.

 

The one N had given her.

 

Her fingers twitched slightly at the sight of it. Ever since that day at the arcade, it had just stayed in her bed. She had never considered throwing it in the closet or stashing it away somewhere. Maybe it was because she hadn’t wanted to; maybe she just hadn’t cared enough to move it. Either way, it had remained there, nestled among the rest of her plushies.

 

Without thinking, she reached out and grabbed it, placing it in her lap. Sitting up against the headboard, she absentmindedly adjusted the plush in her grasp before picking up her phone once more. Propping it up against the stuffed animal, she powered it on, the screen’s glow illuminating her face in the dim light of her room.

 

Uzi’s eyes locked onto the last message N had sent, her glare burning into the screen. She scrolled back up, rereading it as if doing so would suddenly reveal something new—some hidden meaning that would make everything click. But it didn’t. It was still just as vague and frustrating as before.

 

She exhaled sharply, gripping her phone tighter. The longer she stared at his words, the more her irritation mixed with an unbearable curiosity. She needed to know what he was hiding. Why was he being so cryptic? Why couldn’t he just tell her? The fact that he was making her wait—keeping her in the dark like this—only made her more restless.

 

Her mind raced through her options. She could wait until school, like he had suggested, but that meant waiting an entire day before she got any answers. And patience was not one of her strong suits.

 

Maybe she could call him? Or even FaceTime him? But if he wanted to talk over the phone, he would’ve already told her. He was the one who insisted they had to talk face-to-face. He wouldn’t just suddenly change his mind because she was too impatient to wait.

 

That left only one option.

 

If she wanted answers now, she’d have to meet him in person—just like he said.

 

Her eyes flicked back to his message, scrolling up to reread it.

 

N [2:43 PM]: Next time I see you in person. Probably at school.  

 

Her gaze narrowed slightly. Probably at school.

 

He hadn’t said only at school. He hadn’t even confirmed that it had to be there. That meant, technically, they could meet somewhere else—today.

 

Uzi scrolled back down to the most recent message from N, her eyes barely skimming over his words.

 

N [3:39 PM]: I’m sorry, Uzi. I just can’t. 

 

The words lingered in her mind, gnawing at her frustration.

 

Her fingers hovered over the keyboard. She hesitated, staring at the empty text box as doubt crept into her mind. What am I even doing? She wasn’t the type to push for answers—normally, she’d rather figure things out on her own. But this time was different. This time, she needed to know. She couldn’t just let this go.

 

Taking a slow breath, she forced herself to type out a message.

 

Uzi [3:43 PM]: then can we meet today?

 

The moment she pressed send, she regretted it.

 

Uzi’s eyes locked onto the screen, her pulse quickening as she waited. Then, almost immediately, the speech bubble appeared—N was typing.

 

Panic flared in her chest. Without thinking, she flipped her phone face down onto her bed, as if that would somehow lessen the anxiety bubbling up inside her. She tightened her grip on the stuffed cat in her lap, pressing her fingers into its soft fabric as she tried to steady herself. Why am I so nervous? This was stupid. It was just a conversation. And yet, her stomach twisted with anticipation.

 

Her phone vibrated against the blanket.

 

Uzi squeezed her eyes shut for a second before exhaling sharply. Stop being dramatic. She reached for the phone, flipping it over with a reluctant sigh, bracing herself for whatever excuse N would probably come up. Maybe he’d ask why she was so insistent. Maybe he’d tell her no outright. Or maybe, worst of all, he just wouldn’t respond.

 

But when she saw his reply, her breath caught.

 

N [3:43 PM]: Where and what time?

 

No hesitation. No confusion. Just… agreement.

 

Uzi stared at the message, her grip on her phone tightening. She had expected resistance, not immediate compliance. He hadn’t even asked why she suddenly wanted to meet. He was just… willing. Almost too willing.

 

That only made her more uneasy.

 

Uzi hesitated, her fingers hovering over the screen. She hadn't expected him to agree so quickly—if anything, she had braced herself for resistance, or at least a little pushback. But now that she actually had the opportunity to meet him, she realized she hadn't thought ahead. Where were they even supposed to go?

 

Feeling pressured to respond, she hastily typed out the first thing that came to mind.

 

Uzi [3:44 PM]: idk

 

The moment she hit send, she regretted it… again. Seriously? That was the best she could come up with? Not only did she sound unprepared, but she felt like an idiot for even asking in the first place without a plan. Great going, Uzi. Now she was stuck waiting, unsure if he’d even take her seriously after that.

 

Before she could spiral any further, N responded.

 

N [3:45 PM]: We could meet at a coffee shop? And does 4:00 pm sound good?

 

Uzi blinked at the message, mulling over the idea. That… wasn’t a bad suggestion. She didn’t particularly like coffee—energy drinks were more her thing—but she wasn’t about to be picky about something so trivial. This wasn’t about what they were going to drink; this was about finally getting some answers.

 

She quickly typed back.

 

Uzi [3:45 PM]: sure

 

Without wasting time, she opened her maps app and searched for coffee shops nearby. It didn’t take long to find one just down the street from her house. Perfect. She copied the location and sent it to N.

 

Uzi [3:47 PM]: this one

 

A moment later, his response came in.

 

N [3:47 PM] Got it! See you there!

Notes:

I couldn’t think of a different word to use when I said “in person” cuz “in drone” did not make sense 😭🤚 so like ignore the fact that I used that word, u get the point. Idek if anyone even thought anything abt that, I’m probably js overthinking.

Uzi’s texting skills are still so funny to me - “idk” 💔 girl literally asked him to meet up without even having an idea of where

At least N doesn’t gaf abt that LMAO 😭😭😭 he’s literally js going with it ig. He probably didn’t even think twice abt the fact that she said ‘idk’ to begin with 💀

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 30: Coffee

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

As Uzi stepped off the bus, her breath hitched, her systems working overtime to process the sheer weight of anticipation pressing down on her. She wasn’t even sure why she was so nervous—this was just N. And yet, the thought of finally hearing what he had to say, of getting answers, made her core feel like it was twisting in on itself. Her movements were stiff, her hands curling into fists before she forced herself to relax.

 

With a deep breath, she started down the sidewalk, her boots tapping lightly against the pavement as she approached the coffee shop to her left. When she reached the door, she hesitated only for a second before pushing it open.

 

The moment she stepped inside, a wave of warmth greeted her, along with the unmistakable scent of coffee, faintly burnt and bitter, mingling with something sweet—probably pastries. The hum of quiet conversation filled the space, blending with the gentle whir of machines behind the counter. The place was nothing fancy, just an average little café with wooden tables, cushioned booths, and a few barstools lining the counter. The lighting was soft, giving everything a slightly dim, almost cozy atmosphere.

 

Uzi had never been inside before, though she had passed it countless times on her way to school. She had always wondered what it looked like in here, but now that she was seeing it, she didn’t have the time to care. She had to focus.

 

Her eyes scanned the seating area, searching for N. Booths tucked into the corners, high-top tables scattered around, a small line at the register—but no sign of him.

 

Her stomach twisted. What now? She wasn’t about to order anything—she doubted she could even drink anything right now with how anxious she felt. She figured her best option was just to take a seat and wait.

 

Choosing an empty table near the window, she walked over and sank into the chair, crossing her arms as she leaned back slightly. She tapped her fingers against her arm, her eyes flicking toward the entrance every few seconds, waiting.

 

As she sat there, her fingers drumming lightly against her arm, Uzi’s mind spiraled into uneasy thoughts. What if N didn’t show up? The idea sent an unexpected pang of something through her—was it disappointment or just frustration? She didn’t know. What if this was some kind of setup? What if he brought her all the way out here just to tell her something completely insignificant? What if—

 

She cut herself off with a quiet, irritated sigh. No. Stop overthinking. It wasn’t going to do her any good to sit here making up worst-case scenarios in her head. The fact was, N had agreed to meet her. That meant something, right? She had so many questions for him, and she still didn’t understand why this conversation had to be in person. If it was that serious, why not just tell her over text? What was he so insistent about?

 

Just as she was about to lose herself in another wave of anxious speculation, a voice cut through her thoughts, quiet yet unmistakably familiar.

 

“Uzi?”

 

She nearly jolted in her seat. Blinking, she snapped her gaze upward—N was standing in front of her, his usual bright-eyed expression softened by something unreadable. He raised a hand in a small wave, looking almost hesitant.

 

“Uh… mind if I sit here?”

 

For a moment, she just stared at him, still caught between surprise and the lingering embers of irritation. Seeing him in front of her only reignited her frustration—he had been dodging her questions all afternoon, and now he was just standing there, acting like nothing was wrong?

 

Her expression darkened slightly, but she wasn’t about to make a scene. He came all the way here, after all. With a small sigh, she shrugged.

 

“Yeah. Sure.”

 

N took the seat across from her, settling in with a careful sort of energy, as if he could sense the tension rolling off of her. Uzi crossed her arms and leaned back slightly, watching him expectantly, waiting for him to speak first.

 

N offered a small, apologetic smile as he settled into his seat. "Sorry I’m late. I, uh… ran into a little traffic." His voice was light, casual, but there was a slight nervous edge to it, like he was testing the waters.

 

Uzi, however, didn’t care in the slightest. Traffic? That was the last thing on her mind. She had been waiting all day for this conversation, and she wasn’t about to waste any more time on small talk. Her fingers tapped impatiently against the table as she leaned forward, eyes sharp.

 

"Just tell me already," she demanded. "What was so important that you had to talk to me face-to-face? Why couldn’t you just say it over text?"

 

The bluntness of her words made N exhale softly—not an annoyed sigh, but one that seemed more like he was steadying himself. He lowered his gaze for a moment before looking back up at her, his usual brightness dimmed by something more serious.

 

"Because," he said, voice softer now, "if we talked over the phone… I was worried you’d hang up on me."

 

Uzi’s irritation flared instantly, her lips parting as if she was about to snap at him. How dare he say that? Did he really think she was that unreasonable? That she’d just hang up the second she didn’t like what she was hearing?

 

But then, before she could spit out her retort, the realization hit her.

 

He was right.

 

If she had gotten mad enough, she would’ve hung up. And she probably would’ve ignored him for the rest of the day just out of spite. Meeting in person forced her to stay. Forced her to listen.

 

She hated that he had outmaneuvered her like this. She hated even more that, in a way, she was trapped. Cornered. And there was nothing she could do about it.

 

Her fingers curled slightly against the table, jaw tightening. "Fine," she muttered, her voice quieter now, but still laced with frustration. "Then talk."

 

N hesitated before speaking, his fingers fidgeting slightly against the table. His usual bright demeanor was subdued, a rare hesitancy lingering in his expression. “I, uh… I talked to V after what happened last night,” he finally admitted.

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed, her head tilting slightly as she processed his words. “You what?” she asked, completely taken aback. “Why the hell would you do that?”

 

N shifted in his seat, looking almost sheepish. “She… reached out to me first,” he explained carefully.

 

Uzi folded her arms, her suspicion growing. “And you didn’t just ignore her?” she asked, assuming V had messaged or called him. “Why even entertain her after what she did?”

 

N let out a short, humorless chuckle and rubbed the back of his head. “Yeah, well… it wasn’t exactly that easy,” he muttered. “She, uh… came into my house. Through my bedroom window.”

 

Uzi’s expression twisted in disbelief. “What?”

 

N sighed, resting his chin in his palm. “Yeah. She does that a lot.” He paused for a moment, a flicker of something unreadable crossing his face. “Or… she used to, at least. Before she started hanging around J.” His voice was quieter now, and his brows knitted slightly, as if that realization had just fully sunk in.

 

Uzi wasn’t about to let this derail the conversation, though. She leaned forward, tapping her fingers against the table impatiently. “Okay, fine, whatever. What happened after that?”

 

N straightened a little, exhaling before continuing. “At first, she threatened to kill me,” he admitted, his tone almost matter-of-fact—though his expression showed anything but indifference. A flicker of guilt crossed his face, his eyes darting away momentarily. “I mean… to be fair, I did kind of threaten her first…” He trailed off, clearly regretting that part.

 

Uzi scoffed. “Gee, wonder why she was mad,” she said dryly, though her expression remained tense. “Then what? You two just talked after that?”

 

N nodded, though he looked uneasy. “Yeah… once she calmed down, we actually talked.”

 

Uzi wasn’t convinced. She shot him a sharp look. “About what?” she demanded bluntly, cutting straight to the point.

 

N hesitated, rubbing his hands together anxiously before speaking. “At first… V threatened to tell J.” His tone was uneasy, as if he still wasn’t sure where he stood on the matter. “But I— I think I convinced her not to.”

 

Uzi’s expression twisted with concern. “You think?” she echoed, feeling an uneasy pit form in her stomach. That wasn’t exactly reassuring.

 

N winced slightly at her tone, but quickly continued. “She… started talking about what they were supposed to do with you now that you knew everything.” His voice lowered slightly, as if just saying the words out loud made them more dangerous.

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed, suspicion creeping into her gaze. “What do you mean by that?” she asked, her voice sharp.

 

N swallowed hard, looking reluctant to answer. He finally sighed and admitted, “At first… V said we should just—” He hesitated, before exhaling sharply and forcing the words out. “She said we should kill you.”

 

Uzi’s body tensed, an immediate surge of anger flaring up in her expression. She opened her mouth to snap at him, but before she could get a single word out, N quickly waved his hands in front of him, shaking his head. “No— we’re not doing that!” he assured her, his voice urgent.

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes further, arms crossing tightly over her chest. She still looked skeptical, but she remained silent, watching him intently.

 

N’s usual nervous energy faded slightly as his expression grew more serious. His golden eyes locked onto hers with an intensity she wasn’t used to seeing from him. It made her uncomfortable, but she forced herself to hold his gaze.

 

His voice was steady when he spoke again. “But you have to promise me something, Uzi,” he said. “You can’t tell anyone else. If you do…” He hesitated, his fingers clenching slightly against the table. “I know V will kill you. No hesitation.”

 

Uzi clenched her jaw, her first instinct to snap back at him, to tell him he had no right to tell her what she could and couldn’t do. But… she couldn’t bring herself to say it.

 

Because deep down, she knew N wasn’t threatening her—he was warning her.

 

He had already saved her life once, and now, in his own way, he was doing it again.

 

Her expression softened for just a second, but she quickly forced it back into something more neutral, trying to keep up her angry front. She exhaled sharply, her arms still crossed as she leaned back slightly. “Fine,” she muttered. “I promise.”

 

N studied her for a moment, then nodded, seemingly satisfied with her response. The tension in his shoulders eased, and the serious edge to his expression faded. A flicker of relief crossed his face, like he had been expecting her to argue.

 

For a moment, the conversation seemed to settle. Uzi sat in silence, trying to collect her thoughts, before finally breaking it. “That’s it, then?” she asked, her tone flat.

 

N hesitated before shaking his head. “Not exactly.”

 

Uzi raised a brow, waiting.

 

N shifted in his seat, looking slightly uncomfortable again. “I need you to know that… V might talk to you.” His voice was careful, like he was trying to break the news gently. “Now that you know, she’s probably going to feel like she has to keep an eye on you.”

 

Uzi frowned. “You’re saying she’s gonna be watching me?”

 

N nodded. “Not all the time,” he reassured quickly. “She’s not going to be suffocating you or anything. But… she’ll definitely be keeping tabs.”

 

Uzi sat back, processing this. Great. Just what I needed—V looming over my shoulder. Like that was supposed to make her feel any better.

 

Still, she understood why N was telling her. It  again, wasn’t a threat—it was a warning. Just like before. And no matter how much she hated it, she knew he was just trying to prepare her for what came next.

 

Uzi exhaled through her nose, unfolding her arms and leaning forward slightly. “Got it,” she muttered, acknowledging what he had said. But before N could think the conversation was over, she continued, her tone sharper now. “But now, it’s my turn to ask questions.”

 

N straightened up, his expression shifting to something more attentive. He gave a small nod, signaling for her to go on.

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed slightly. The whole reason she had insisted on meeting him today was because she wanted answers—real answers. Not half-explanations or dodged questions. The wound on her shoulder had almost completely healed in less than a day. That wasn’t normal. Something had to have caused it, and she had a very strong suspicion that N was involved.

 

She folded her hands together on the table, her fingers gripping each other tightly as she fixed him with a scrutinizing stare. “Why is my arm already healed?” she asked, voice edged with suspicion. “Did you do something?”

 

Her tone wasn’t just questioning—it was accusatory, almost like she had already decided he was guilty of something. She wanted to see his reaction, to gauge whether or not he was going to try and lie to her.

 

Because if he thought he could dodge this question, he had another thing coming.

Notes:

Did u really think I was js gonna leave yall with the last chapter and not post another one today? Hopefully not 💔

Also gonna post the one after this too! So three chapters total are being posted today!

Whenever I’m not posting a chapter and not busy, I’m usually writing, but rn I’m at a part where I’m js tryna figure out how to continue it yk? Obvi not gonna give context cuz u have to wait and see 😈

But yeah while I'm brainstorming I decided that I might as well post a few chapters today

AND ALSO so like, I really didn’t wanna leave yall with an unanswered question abt what’s happening cuz these chapters that I’m posting are like super important and explain a lot. And like, another note, I don’t think I’ve had a dialogue heavy chapter for a while, so this is pretty nice -

If I was a reader and an author js left me at this major unanswered question for a bit I would literally die like omfg 😭💔

Next chapter is gonna be a doozy istg 💀 I almost died when I was writing it

Ok I’m not gonna say anything else abt it, go read it 🤬

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you

Chapter 31: Ignominy

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi was prepared for a lot of different reactions—defensiveness, hesitation, maybe even some pathetic excuse—but this? This was not what she expected.

 

The moment her words sank in, N’s entire demeanor shifted. His eyes widened briefly in surprise before his expression contorted into something completely different. Embarrassment. Genuine embarrassment. His face, already pale, took on a noticeable reddish tint, and he immediately dropped his gaze to his hands, fiddling with his fingers as if suddenly finding them fascinating.

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes. What was this reaction supposed to mean?

 

“I… uh…” N stammered, his voice cracking slightly before he forced himself to continue. “S-So…”

 

Uzi drummed her fingers impatiently on the table. “So what?” she pressed, her tone irritated and confused.

 

N took a breath, clearly trying to compose himself, but his flustered expression remained. He hesitated, then finally spoke. “Like I, uh… mentioned last night,” he started awkwardly, still unable to meet her eyes, “Disassembly Drones… we have healing abilities.”

 

He still looked completely flustered, his hands now gripping each other tightly on the table. Before he could explain further, Uzi cut him off, her voice sharp with accusation. “Does that mean you turned me into one?!”

 

N’s head shot up, eyes wide in sheer panic. “No!” he blurted out, shaking his hands frantically in front of him. “No, no, no—I promise! You’re not—I didn’t—

 

Uzi wasn’t convinced. Her suspicion only grew as she folded her arms tightly across her chest, eyes narrowing. “Then what did happen?” she demanded. “What do you mean?”

 

N swallowed hard, his flustered panic not fading in the slightest. He looked like he was trying to form the right words, but Uzi wasn’t sure if she was ready for whatever he was about to say next.

 

N hesitated, shifting in his seat as if dreading what he had to say next. “It’s not just that Disassembly Drones heal faster,” he started carefully, still avoiding eye contact. “We… also have healing properties in our saliva.”

 

Uzi stared at him, the words slowly sinking in. Healing properties in their saliva? What was he getting at? She blinked, letting that thought turn over in her mind before her expression twisted in realization. She met his eyes sharply, suspicion creeping into her voice. “Are you saying that you…”

 

Before she could even finish the sentence, N gave a small, guilty nod, confirming her worst fear.

 

Uzi jerked back in horror, her chair screeching slightly against the floor. “Did you LICK my shoulder?!” she demanded, her voice pitching up in shock.

 

N let out a sharp, embarrassed hiss through his teeth, his entire posture collapsing in on itself. His face, already flustered, somehow turned an even darker shade of red. “I-It’s…really hard to control myself when there’s—when there’s oil—” he babbled, his voice frantic, as if trying to justify his actions.

 

Uzi recoiled further, instinctively clutching her shoulder as if that would somehow undo what had already happened. It didn’t hurt in the slightest—actually, it felt perfectly fine. Too fine. The realization that N had actually done that made her stomach twist uncomfortably. Heat rushed to her face, a mortifying mix of embarrassment and… no. No, she was not even going to go there.

 

“What the hell, N?!” she sputtered, her voice caught between disgust and something she refused to name.

 

N winced at her reaction, “I-I know! I’m sorry! I didn’t tell you because—because I didn’t want to be weird…” he blurted out, clearly panicking. His hands gripped the edge of the table as he practically shrank into himself. “I swear, I-I was just trying to help, and—”

 

He groaned and buried his face in his hands. “Oh, this is so bad,” he muttered under his breath.

 

Uzi exhaled sharply, forcing herself to calm down despite the heat creeping up her neck. This whole thing was humiliating. And weird. And… well. At least she wasn’t dead.

 

She grumbled, shifting uncomfortably in her seat. “I mean… at least I’m healed now,” she muttered, not entirely sure if she was saying it for his sake or for her own. Probably for herself. Definitely for herself.

 

N peeked up at her through his fingers, still looking completely mortified.

 

Though, he suddenly latched onto Uzi’s reluctant acceptance like it was a lifeline. “Right! Y-Yeah, exactly,” he agreed quickly, his voice a little too eager to smooth things over. His tense posture softened as he seemingly forced himself to relax. “I-I really am sorry, though—”

 

Uzi, still trying to regain her own composure, cut him off with a sharp wave of her hand. “It’s fine. Really.” She exhaled through her nose, forcing herself to push past the humiliation of the whole situation. This wasn’t something she should dwell on. It didn’t matter. She just had to be logical about this.

 

But despite telling herself that, one last question nagged at the back of her mind.

 

She glanced at N, her expression hardening slightly. “You’re sure I haven’t been turned into one of those… things?” she asked, her voice lined with wary suspicion.

 

N immediately shook his head. “Positive,” he reassured her. He hesitated, then clarified, “The only way that would happen is if you got bitten in a vital area. Like your neck.” He made a vague motion with his hands before quickly dropping them, as if realizing that wasn’t helping. “Which I didn’t do. Promise.” His face, though still tinged with embarrassment, had finally started to settle into something calmer, more composed.

 

Uzi studied him for a moment, searching his face for any sign of dishonesty. But, as usual, N wasn’t lying. He was many things—annoying, overly cheerful, a complete weirdo—but he wasn’t a liar.

 

She gave him a small nod, letting that final piece of tension slip from her shoulders. “Alright. Good.” A quiet sigh left her, relief washing over her in full. At least she wouldn’t have to worry about that.

 

A thick silence settled between them, heavy with everything that had just been said. It wasn’t necessarily awkward, but there was a weight to it—an unspoken understanding that neither of them really knew how to respond to what had just been revealed. Uzi found herself absently gripping her own arm, staring at the table without really seeing it, her mind running in circles.   

 

The quiet stretched on until N finally broke it. “Hey, um… do you mind if I grab some coffee real quick?” His voice was softer than usual, like he was still treading carefully after everything.   

 

Uzi blinked, snapping out of her thoughts. “Oh—yeah, go ahead,” she said, waving a hand dismissively.   

 

Honestly? She didn’t mind at all. If anything, a few minutes alone was exactly what she needed right now. Just some time to process—to let all of this sink in without N sitting there, fidgeting and making things more complicated.   

 

N, oblivious to her inner relief, smiled faintly. “Thanks.” He pushed himself up from his seat and turned toward the counter, leaving Uzi alone at the table.

 

Uzi leaned back in her chair, exhaling sharply as she pressed her fingers against her temples. As if that would somehow help clear her racing thoughts.

 

N wasn’t avoiding the situation. If anything, he was handling it far better than she would have. If their roles were reversed, she wouldn’t have just left to get coffee—she would’ve bolted out the door and never looked back. But N? He was still here. Not trying to run, not trying to make excuses, not even getting defensive. He was just… genuine. In everything he said.

 

That was what unsettled her the most. How could someone be like that? So patient, so forgiving, so sincere, even after everything? It didn’t make sense to her. It felt almost unnatural—like something out of a movie rather than real life.

 

And the way it made her feel? She didn’t want to deal with it. She wanted to shove it down, lock it away, and pretend it wasn’t happening. But it was impossible to ignore the lingering heat on her face, the restless, twisting feeling in her chest.

 

With a frustrated sigh, she dropped her hands to the table, gripping the edge slightly as if grounding herself. She needed to snap out of it. This wasn’t the time to start overanalyzing emotions she didn’t even want to acknowledge.

 

Without thinking, Uzi’s hand slipped into her pocket, pulling out her phone. The screen flickered to life under her touch, and she quickly navigated to her music app, the familiar comfort of it already easing some of the tension in her chest. Music had always been her escape, her anchor in moments of chaos.

 

She dug around in her other pocket for her wire headphones, untangling them absentmindedly as her fingers brushed over the cords. The simple, almost ritualistic act of plugging them into her phone brought her a small sense of relief, a momentary distraction from the swirl of thoughts that had been clawing at her mind.

 

As she pressed play, the shuffle feature kicked in, and a familiar song began to play. She let the music flow into her ears, the beat filling the silence around her and giving her a brief respite from everything. It was a relief—just the idea of the music seemed to settle her nerves, the sound swallowing up the noise in her head.

 

Uzi leaned back in her seat, her eyes closing for a moment as she let herself just be. She had nothing else to focus on right now, nothing else to think about except the calming rhythm of the track in her ears. She could deal with the rest when N came back. For now, she just had to wait.

Notes:

BAHHAHAHAHAHA LMAOOO 😭😭😭

Did u think that Uzi had been turned into one of the disassembly drones? I feel like this is worse 💔

No but like, on a real note, I didn’t want to js turn her into one, yk? I feel like that would’ve been so predictable and like tbh I feel like I would’ve lost interest in reading (if I were the reader ig) cuz that’s js so like - 😕

Am I making sense? I mean don’t get me wrong, that isn’t a bad plot point whatsoever, but in the *specific* context of *this* story at this *specific* point in time, personally I feel like there hasn’t been enough world building and other stuff for that to actually be good.

Regardless of if I’m making sense or not, I got other things to say

So, ik canonically in Murder Drones, the disassembly drones don’t have healing saliva *overall* - it’s specifically to neutralizes the poison in their tail things just incase they accidentally sting themselves. (Ik, I’m great at explaining things 😎)

But, in this Universe, I thought ‘why not js have them have healing saliva in general?’ I had already thought abt that when I was js planning what Disassembly drones were gonna be like in this AU also. Who knew that it would come in handy ig 😭

Also I love the fact that they’re basically on a date but like, not at all - of all places N decided to suggest a coffee shop?? I’m not saying that was his intention because 100% it was *not*, but he couldn’t have js suggested a park or something? Idfk 😭🤚

OH AND ONE LAST THING, SUPER IMPORTANT. Abt the last chapter - the part when N told Uzi about his conversation with V (when she basically broke into his house 😭) — Would anyone want me to write like, a mini-in between chapter from N’s POV of that interaction? I’ve been considering it, but I’m really fucking lazy LMAO. So if more than 5 people request it, I’ll do it. Just wanted to let yall know.

Ok, that’s all I have to say - see yall tomorrow!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you

Chapter 32: Cake pop

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Eventually, movement at the edge of her vision caught Uzi’s attention. A small, brown paper bag slid across the table toward her. Blinking in surprise, she reached up to pull out her headphones, wrapping them around her fingers before shoving them into her pocket. When she finally looked up, she found N sitting across from her again, his usual, somewhat awkward smile on his face. She hadn’t even noticed him return.

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly as she eyed the bag. “What is this?” she asked, suspicion lacing her tone.

 

N leaned forward slightly, still smiling, though there was a shyness to it. “Just open it,” he urged, his voice light but sincere.

 

Uzi let out an exaggerated sigh and rolled her eyes, feigning disinterest as she reached into the bag. Her fingers curled around something small and smooth, and as she pulled it out, she was met with the sight of a cake pop—shaped like a dog. Its design was simple but undeniably cute, the little chocolate features forming an expression that almost seemed too cheerful.

 

Before she could say anything, N spoke again, shifting slightly in his seat. “I didn’t want to not get you anything,” he admitted, glancing down at his coffee cup before taking a quick sip. “I mean, you came all this way, so… yeah.” His tone was genuine, almost bashful, as if he wasn’t entirely sure whether this was the right thing to do.

 

Uzi turned the cake pop between her fingers, studying it. She wasn’t sure why, but something about the gesture made her chest feel strangely tight. Her eyes flicked back up to N, and in that instant, the heat from earlier returned, creeping up her neck and into her face. Was she embarrassed?That didn’t make any sense—why would she be embarrassed? It was just a dumb cake pop.

 

She quickly looked away, breaking eye contact before the warmth in her face could betray her. “You didn’t have to,” she muttered, still staring at the little dog-shaped treat in her hands. “You bought it, not me.” Her voice came out a little quieter than intended, her usual sharpness slightly dulled.

 

She told herself it was just the unexpectedness of it all that threw her off—not anything else. Definitely not.

 

N insisted gently, his voice calm and polite, without even a hint of pressure. “Nah, I got it for you,” he said simply, as if that was reason enough. “You should have it.”

 

Uzi clenched her jaw slightly, determined not to let this whole situation get to her. She wasn’t going to let N see any kind of reaction—especially not the one she was actually having internally. Forcing herself to exhale in an exaggerated sigh, she feigned reluctance, doing her best to ignore the way her face still felt uncomfortably warm. “Fine,” she muttered, pausing briefly before tacking on, “Thanks, I guess.” She made sure her tone sounded indifferent, but the smile threatening to creep onto her face was much harder to suppress.

 

As she glanced back up at him, N was still smiling at her—genuinely, effortlessly, like this was just natural for him. Then, without a word, he lifted his coffee cup to take another sip, still looking at her with that same stupidly sincere expression.

 

Uzi immediately averted her gaze, her grip tightening slightly around the cake pop as she stared down at it like it suddenly held the answers to all her problems. She was not going to let this get to her.

 

In an attempt to ground herself, she let her mind slip into its usual defensive mode. What if he was just trying to manipulate her? It would make sense, wouldn’t it? Butter her up, make her drop her guard—but even as the thought crossed her mind, she knew it wasn’t true. N didn’t have it in him. That kind of deception wasn’t who he was.

 

Still, she refused to dwell on that. Instead, she simply took a small, hesitant bite of the cake pop.

 

The flavor hit her immediately—cookies and cream. One of her favorites.

 

Her fingers curled slightly around the stick as she processed that realization. Of course it had to be a flavor she liked. Because that just made this whole situation even harder to ignore.

 

A quiet lull settled between them, but for once, it didn’t feel tense or heavy. There was no lingering hostility, no unspoken accusations hanging in the air. Just silence—one that, strangely enough, felt… peaceful. Maybe it was the relief of finally getting answers, of clearing the confusion that had been weighing on them both. Maybe it was just exhaustion. Either way, for the first time since last night, Uzi didn’t feel like she was seconds away from snapping.

 

She finished the last bite of her cake pop, her fingers idly twisting the empty stick before slipping it back into the paper bag. She could still taste the lingering sweetness, but she forced herself not to dwell on it. Instead, she stared down at the table, refusing to let her eyes wander back toward N. She wasn’t sure why she was avoiding eye contact—only that she was—and she wasn’t about to waste time figuring it out.

 

Needing something to do, she reached into her pocket and pulled out her phone. The screen lit up, displaying the time: 4:35 PM.

 

Her gaze flickered toward N, and after a brief moment of hesitation, she spoke up. “I should probably get going,” she said, keeping her tone neutral. “It’s getting kind of late.”

 

N gave a small nod, not looking surprised. “Yeah, makes sense,” he said simply.

 

Taking that as her cue, Uzi pushed herself up from her seat, gathering her things and steeling herself to leave. But just as she turned, ready to walk away, she heard N’s voice.

 

“Uzi.”

 

She stopped.

 

For a split second, she debated ignoring him—just leaving, acting like she didn’t hear—but instead, she found herself glancing back. Her eyes met his again, and despite herself, she stayed put.

 

“…What?” she asked, watching him carefully.

 

N hesitated, his mouth opening slightly before closing again, as if weighing his words carefully. His fingers curled slightly around the coffee cup in his hands, and he exhaled softly before finally speaking.

 

“…I just—I just wanted to say that I’m really sorry,” he said, his voice quieter than before. His gaze dropped for a moment before flicking back up to meet hers, sincerity written all over his expression. “I know that saying sorry isn’t going to magically fix anything. I know that. But I still mean it, Uzi. I really do.”

 

There was a pause—brief, almost fragile—but before Uzi could even begin to form a response, N pushed forward.

 

“I get it,” he continued, his voice steady despite the clear apprehension in his eyes. “Everything I told you—it’s a lot. It’s confusing. And you should be mad at me. I wouldn’t blame you if you were.” His fingers drummed once against the side of his cup before stopping. “But… if I can, I want to make it up to you. I don’t want this to—” he exhaled sharply, as if frustrated with himself, then tried again. “I don’t want this to ruin our friendship.”

 

Silence settled between them once more, but this time, it felt heavier.

 

Uzi felt something twist uncomfortably in her chest, though she wasn’t sure if it was guilt, frustration, or something else entirely. He looked so earnest—so completely genuine—that it almost made her feel worse. How was she even supposed to respond to this?

 

She clenched her jaw slightly, her thoughts racing in a direction she didn’t want them to. She should still be mad. She had every reason to be. And yet… she wasn’t sure if she could be anymore.

 

N’s expression shifted subtly—just enough for Uzi to notice, though she still couldn’t quite place what it meant. His eyes held something unspoken, something laced with a weight she didn’t recognize. He hesitated, his fingers tapping against his coffee cup before stilling completely. It seemed like he was debating whether or not to continue, but eventually, his voice broke through the silence again, softer this time.

 

“I… I just—I’m really glad you’re okay.” His tone was so genuine, so unguarded, that it caught Uzi off guard. He wasn’t just saying it to fill the silence; he meant it, completely and wholeheartedly.

 

There was another pause, but this time, N didn’t speak again. He just sat there, his expression unreadable, though there was a flicker of emotion in his gaze that Uzi couldn’t decipher. It unsettled her—not because it was threatening, but because she didn’t understand it.

 

Her fingers clenched slightly at her side, and she felt something unfamiliar twist deep in her core. She didn’t even know what she was feeling right now. Was it tension? Stress? Something else entirely? She wasn’t sure. It was like there was a weight in her chest, not painful, but heavy—something she couldn’t ignore, no matter how much she wanted to.

 

It didn’t make sense. It was frustrating. It was foreign.

 

And worst of all, she didn’t know what to do with it.

 

Uzi refused to let the silence stretch any longer. Just standing there, staring at him, made something in her chest tighten uncomfortably. She needed to say something—anything—before this moment became unbearable.

 

“I, uh—” she hesitated for just a second before blurting out the first thing that came to mind. “I’m… glad you’re okay too.”

 

The words left her mouth quicker than she could process them, but once they were out, she felt some of the tension ease—only to be replaced by something else when she realized she was smiling. Not a smirk, not an amused scoff—an actual, small, sheepish smile. And when she looked at N, he was mirroring it, his own expression soft, sincere.

 

The moment stretched between them, lingering far longer than she was prepared for. Eye contact locked, unmoving. Uzi felt trapped, but not in the way she usually did when she was stuck in an interaction she didn’t want to be in. This was different. It was undeniable, yet not entirely unwelcome.

 

Still, it was too much. Too strange.

 

Her gaze snapped away, breaking the moment as she forced herself to look down and to the side, her expression resetting as her smile faded. She didn’t give him the chance to respond—not that he seemed like he was going to—but she turned on her heel and walked away, her pace brisk but not hurried.

 

Reaching the door of the coffee shop, she hesitated. Something made her glance over her shoulder one last time.

 

N was still watching her.

 

As soon as their eyes met again, he lifted his hand in a small, almost hesitant wave. It wasn’t overly eager, nor was it awkward—just simple. Uzi found herself lifting her own hand in return, waving goodbye herself before finally stepping outside.

 

The door shut behind her with a quiet click, but the feeling from that moment lingered. She couldn’t shake it.

 

-

 

Lying on her back, Uzi stared blankly at the ceiling, her mind refusing to let her rest. No matter how much she tried to push it away, the conversation from earlier kept looping in her head like a broken record.

 

"I’m… glad you’re okay too."

 

The words echoed, over and over, taunting her. What did that even mean? Why did she say that? N hadn’t not been okay… right? Well, maybe for a moment—when V scratched him—but he healed fast. It wasn’t like he had been the one in danger. She was the one freaking out, the one who got mad, the one who basically yelled at him, even after he literally saved her life.

 

And yet, despite everything, N was still protecting her. He had convinced V not to kill her. Even after all the accusations, the frustration, the suspicion—he still wanted to make things right. To make sure she was safe.

 

Why?

 

Uzi squeezed her eyes shut, frustration bubbling in her chest. Why did this feel so complicated? Why couldn’t she just stop thinking about it?

 

With an exasperated groan, she rolled onto her side, curling in on herself. The blankets felt heavier than usual, but they didn’t bring her any comfort. Her mind was still racing, still tangled up in a mess of thoughts and feelings she didn’t understand.

 

Why did feelings have to be so complicated?

 

Just as she was about to shut her eyes, a flicker of color caught her attention from the corner of her vision. A soft, muted purple.

 

Her gaze shifted.

 

The stuffed cat.

 

The one N had given her.

 

For a moment, frustration flared in her chest. She hated this. Hated everything. The way her emotions were tangled up in a mess she couldn’t unravel. The way N had somehow managed to wedge himself so deeply into her mind that she couldn’t even sleep without thinking about him. It was infuriating.

 

Her fingers twitched. She wanted to throw it—hurl it across the room, watch it hit the wall and land in some forgotten corner where she wouldn’t have to look at it anymore. Maybe then, it wouldn’t feel like a reminder. Of him. Of everything.

 

But…

 

Uzi hesitated.

 

Slowly, almost reluctantly, she reached for it instead. The soft synthetic fur met her fingers as she pulled it close, clutching it against her chest. It was warm. Lighter than she expected.

 

She exhaled shakily, her grip tightening for a moment before loosening. The weight in her chest didn’t vanish, but it dulled just a little. As if holding something tangible—something real—made it easier to breathe.

 

She was so tired.

 

The exhaustion settled over her like a heavy fog, thick and consuming. Her body ached, not from physical strain, but from the sheer weight of everything. The overthinking. The emotions. The constant battle raging in her own head.

 

Absentmindedly, she brushed her thumb back and forth over the stuffed cat’s fur, the repetitive motion oddly soothing. Her eyes grew heavier with each passing second.

 

She didn’t even realize she was slipping into sleep until the thoughts stopped. Until everything faded into a quiet peace.

 

 

Notes:

OH EM GEEE this is like, one of my most favorite chapters that I’ve written so far.

And also this concludes the end of this arc! I don’t really have names for them ig, but like there was the first one, and then this is the second one. The third one is gonna start next chapter

I think a few chapters back, I wrote in my author’s notes a timeline of events. I’m gonna copy and paste it, then add to it below:

- The first week was when Uzi found the letter, next day found another one, got a detention, next day met N’s friend group, and then the next day was invited to hang out with them.

- The same day she was invited (Saturday) she went to the hang out. Then, the hang out went into the middle of the night of the next day (Sunday) which was also when the murder took place (according to the news and stuff from Uzi’s pov. But I’m gonna confirm is true, it did happen on Sunday.)

- Monday passed without incident, but I didn’t detail it in the story. It was just a normal day, and no one knew because the somehow the school kept it secret. Maybe the victim didn’t have a lot of friends or som, or the ones he did have assumed he was sick yk, had no idea he was dead.

- Tuesday was the actual announcement and then everyone was like absolutely traumatized 😭

- Then, it’s not specified how many days took place after that. Let’s assume when Uzi was thinking alone in her room, it was the beginning of the next week.

- Uzi convinces N to help her investigate the murder. Later that evening, she asks Thad, but he declines. This is probably around Tuesday-Wednesday-Thursday. Don’t really have anything specified, cuz js know that in between the time before she asked them she had been planing for a bit.

- Friday is the day when Uzi and N stay after school. The whole incident with V happens. When Uzi gets home, she’s exhausted, falls asleep immediately.

- Next day (Saturday) around 2:00pm Uzi is up. Discovers her arm was healed somehow around 3:30, then N and her agree to meet at 4:00

- They meet at the coffee shop, the past few chapters happen (mostly js dialogue ig) then Uzi leaves around 4:35-40

Next day is Sunday, and the next chapter will take place on Monday I believe. I’ll edit this if I’m wrong, but I should be right.

AND THAT’S ITTTT I can’t believe how much time has passed in the story, I didn’t even realize

Should post the next chapter today or tomorrow, js depends on how I’m feeling ig

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you

Chapter 33: Monotony

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The weekend had felt agonizingly slow, dragging on like it was deliberately trying to test her patience. Now, finally, Monday had arrived. Back to routine. Back to the monotony of school.

 

Yet, as Uzi sat in third period, her chin resting on her hand, she found herself just as restless as before.

 

The lesson spieled on, but she wasn’t absorbing a single word of it. Her eyes flickered between the clock and her desk, silently willing time to move faster. She hadn’t even talked to her friends yet today—hadn’t had the chance. The morning had been a rushed blur after she nearly overslept.

 

She sighed, slouching further into her seat. She really needed to stop staying up so late playing video games. Every time she told herself, just one more match, she somehow ended up awake until an hour she definitely shouldn’t have been.

 

Note to self: Get. More. Sleep.

 

Not that she’d actually listen.

 

Uzi scoffed lightly at herself, shaking her head as if dismissing her own thoughts. With a quiet sigh, she picked up the pencil lying idly on her desk and started sketching in the margins of her notebook.

 

At the beginning of class, she had actually tried to take notes—tried to be productive. That effort had lasted all of five minutes before her thoughts had completely derailed her focus.

 

And now, her mind was stuck on him.

 

Lunch was coming up soon. She’d see N again. Would it be weird? Would he act differently? No—probably not. She’d be the one making it weird, if anything. The very idea made her cringe internally.

 

But it wasn’t worth stressing over something that hadn’t even happened yet. It’d be a waste of time to keep overthinking— right? 

 

Still, her mind refused to let it go.

 

Then there was V. N had warned her that V would be ‘watching’ her now, whatever that meant. But how? Would V be constantly around? Just keeping tabs from a distance? The ambiguity of it all unsettled her more than she wanted to admit.

 

Before her thoughts could spiral any further, the sharp ring of the bell jolted her back to reality.

 

Almost instantly, the quiet hum of the classroom erupted into the chaotic shuffle of students rushing to leave—some walking, others practically sprinting to escape the lesson.

 

Uzi exhaled, shaking off the remnants of her thoughts as she gathered her things. She slung her backpack over her shoulders and began to walk towards the door.

 

Just one more period until lunch.

 

-

 

Uzi stood at her locker, swiftly unzipping her backpack and shoving a few books inside with little care for organization. Her movements were quick and practiced, switching out textbooks from the shelf and stuffing them into her bag without much thought. Finally, with an exasperated sigh, she yanked the zipper shut and slammed her locker door closed—

 

Only to nearly jump out of her frame when she was immediately met with someone standing behind it.

 

She flinched, eyes widening slightly before quickly narrowing in irritation.

 

Thad.

 

He was leaning casually against the locker beside hers, one foot propped up against it, arms crossed over his chest. The instant he saw her reaction, his face split into a wide grin, and a laugh bubbled out of him.

 

"Whoa! Did I scare you?" he asked, voice dripping with amusement.

 

Uzi’s expression immediately flattened, unamused. “What do you think?” she shot back sarcastically.

 

Still chuckling to himself, Thad pushed off the locker and faced her directly. “Man, you should’ve seen your face,” he grinned. “I wish I had been recording.”

 

Uzi groaned, rolling her eyes before shoving his shoulder in annoyance. “Shut up,” she said bluntly.

 

Thad, still smirking, didn’t seem fazed in the slightest.

 

Letting out an irritated sigh, Uzi crossed her arms. “What do you want?” Her tone was unimpressed, already over whatever nonsense he was about to pull.

 

Thad gave a nonchalant shrug, a lazy grin still lingering on his face. “Dunno,” he admitted, sounding entirely unbothered. “I was bored, figured I’d see what you were up to.”

 

Uzi exhaled sharply, rolling her eyes. “You do know lunch exists, right? You could’ve just waited until then.” Her tone was dry, unimpressed.

 

Thad opened his mouth to respond, but before he could, the sharp ring of the bell cut through the hallway.

 

Uzi tensed, eyes widening slightly before snapping toward Thad with an accusatory glare. “Oh, great,” she huffed sarcastically, throwing her arms up. “Now I’m gonna be late—thanks for that.”

 

Thad blinked, startled by the bell, before giving an awkward chuckle. “Uh—oops?” he offered, rubbing the back of his head. “My bad.”

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes at him, unimpressed.

 

Taking that as his cue to leave, Thad threw up a quick wave. “Anyway—see ya later!” he called, before spinning on his heel and bolting down the hall.

 

Uzi took a sharp breath through her teeth. Yeah, you better run.

 

Not wasting another second, she turned  and sprinted toward her next class, silently cursing herself for getting distracted.

 

Uzi skidded to a stop in front of the classroom door, reaching for the handle—only to find it locked. Damn it.

 

Jaw tightening, she knocked, shifting impatiently on her feet. A few seconds later, the door creaked open, revealing her teacher’s unimpressed face. He stared at her with the kind of exhaustion that came from years of dealing with late students, his sigh heavy with disappointment.

 

“You’re late,” he stated flatly, his expression unreadable.

 

Uzi crossed her arms, already bracing herself for whatever was coming next.

 

The teacher exhaled sharply. “That’ll be a  detention.” His tone was tired, like he had neither the energy nor the patience to deal with this today.

 

Uzi clenched her jaw, a spark of irritation flaring in her chest. Seriously? It wasn’t her fault Thad had wasted her time. But she knew arguing wouldn’t get her anywhere—it’d probably just make things worse. So, instead of snapping back like she wanted to, she forced her voice to stay neutral.

 

“Okay,” she said simply, biting back the urge to roll her eyes.

 

Her teacher gave her one last look before stepping aside, motioning for her to take her seat. Suppressing a frustrated sigh, Uzi stalked to her desk, dropping into her chair with a little more force than necessary.

 

The moment she sat down, the teacher resumed his lesson—something about history, or whatever. Uzi didn’t care. She wasn’t listening.

 

Detention. Great. Just what she needed.

 

-

 

The agonizing monotony of the last period had finally come to an end, and Uzi couldn’t have been more relieved. As the lunch bell rang, signaling freedom—at least temporarily—she gathered her things and made her way toward the cafeteria.

 

There was a faint, almost unnoticeable sense of anticipation creeping at the edges of her thoughts, though she quickly dismissed it. I’m just hungry. That’s all. Yeah, that had to be it. Nothing more.

 

As soon as she entered the cafeteria, the chaotic energy hit her like a wall. The place was as loud and unruly as ever—drones talking over each other, laughing, some yelling across tables. The distant hum of vending machines, the clatter of trays, the occasional screech of a chair dragging across the floor. It was just another typical, noisy lunch period.

 

She navigated through the crowd, heading straight for the usual spot by the vending machines. That’s where her group always sat—a little corner, somewhat out of the way, but still close enough to watch the rest of the cafeteria from a distance. As she approached, she quickly took note of who was already there.

 

Thad. Darren. …And N.

 

The second Thad noticed her, he waved enthusiastically, grinning like he hadn’t just been the reason she was now stuck with a detention. Uzi shot him a glare, still feeling justified in holding onto her annoyance. He only laughed in response, unfazed.

 

Darren simply gave her a nod of acknowledgment. And then there was N.

 

He met her gaze, his expression soft as he lifted a hand in a small, friendly wave. His smile was warm, casual—like nothing about today was different. Like there wasn’t anything weird or awkward between them.

 

Uzi forced herself to return the wave, but her movements felt mechanical, stiff. She wasn’t even sure why.

 

There was no reason for this weird feeling bubbling inside her. No reason at all.

 

As Uzi finally reached the group, Thad was, unsurprisingly, the first to speak up. With a bright, almost too-innocent grin, he greeted her casually before tilting his head and asking, “So, how was your last class?”

 

Uzi shot him a sharp look, grimacing as she crossed her arms. “Oh, wonderful,” she replied sarcastically. “Got a detention. Because someone made me late.”

 

Thad smirked, completely unfazed by her irritation. “Oof. That sucks.” His tone held absolutely zero remorse.

 

Uzi’s glare deepened. “Shouldn’t you have gotten one too?”

 

At this, Thad dramatically averted his gaze, his expression shifting into one of exaggerated innocence. “Hmm. Maybe I did. Maybe I didn’t.”

 

Uzi didn’t even hesitate. “So, you did get one.”

 

Thad merely shrugged, still keeping up the act. “Maybe.”

 

Uzi groaned and rolled her eyes in annoyance, resisting the urge to shove him again.

 

Thad only chuckled, looking far too pleased with himself, while Darren—who had been quietly watching—shook his head with mild amusement. Meanwhile, N had been silent, sipping from a juice box, his expression unreadable.

 

Uzi turned toward her usual spot within the circle and slid down against the wall, stretching her legs out slightly as she set her bag beside her. With a quick zip, she opened it and pulled out her lunch box, flipping it open to grab Cheese-its and a juice box. She absentmindedly crinkled the bag in her hands before glancing around at the group.

 

“Where are Emily and Rebecca?” she asked, looking between them.

 

N was the one to answer. “They went to grab lunch,” he said simply, his tone casual.

 

Uzi gave a short nod, but something about how normal he sounded rubbed her the wrong way. So… he wasn’t feeling awkward about anything? At all? Meanwhile, she’d spent way too much time thinking about this. She scolded herself internally, feeling irritation creep in—not at him, but at herself. This was stupid.

 

As if on cue, Emily and Rebecca appeared, balancing lunch trays in their hands as they approached the group.

 

“Hey, losers,” Rebecca greeted, smirking as she set her tray down.

 

Emily sighed, giving her a side-eye. “Rebecca, please.”

 

Thad grinned. “She’s got a point, though.”

 

“Yeah, yeah,” Uzi muttered, shaking her head before taking a sip from her juice.

 

N, still sipping from his own, gave a small wave. “Hey, guys.”

 

With a few more exchanged greetings, the two sat down, settling into their usual spots.

 

The group naturally slipped into conversation, the kind of effortless back-and-forth that came with spending so much time together.

 

“So,” Thad started, leaning back against the wall, “I finally finished that stupid history project last night. Thought I was gonna have to pull an all-nighter.”

 

Darren snorted. “Dude, that thing was due this morning.”

 

“Exactly!” Thad exclaimed, throwing his hands up. “I’m running on, like, three hours of sleep.”

 

Rebecca smirked. “And that’s different from usual how?

 

Thad placed a hand over his chest dramatically. “Wow. The disrespect.”

 

Emily sighed, shaking her head. “You seriously need to stop procrastinating.”

 

“Yeah, yeah,” Thad waved her off. “I got it done, didn’t I?”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes but didn’t say anything, munching on a cheese-it as the conversation shifted.

 

Rebecca turned to N, tilting her head. “What about you? How was your weekend?”

 

N blinked at the sudden attention but quickly smiled. “Oh! It was, uh… eventful?” He rubbed the back of his neck. “But good! I think.”

 

Uzi shot him a glance, her expression unreadable. Eventful was definitely one way to put it.

 

Emily raised a brow. “That’s… vague.”

 

N let out a nervous chuckle, clearly not planning to elaborate.

 

Before anyone could press further, Rebecca looked over at Uzi. “What about you?”

 

Uzi stiffened for a fraction of a second before responding, “Eh, same as always. Just played video games and, y’know, existed.”

 

Thad snickered. “So basically, you wasted the entire weekend.”

 

Uzi glared at him. “It’s not like you don’t do the same.”

 

He only grinned wider, and Darren chuckled at their usual banter.

 

The conversation continued, jumping from topic to topic—complaints about school, weekend plans that never actually happened, and general nonsense. It was easy. Normal. And for a while, Uzi let herself get lost in it, pushing aside the lingering thoughts that had been bothering her all day.

 

As the lunch period went on, the conversation naturally split into smaller discussions. Emily and Rebecca had shifted their focus to something about getting their nails done, excitedly debating over colors and styles. Meanwhile, Thad and Darren were deep in discussion about some new show they had started watching, tossing around theories and arguing over their favorite characters.

 

Uzi, meanwhile, took a bite of her sandwich, savoring the taste as she leaned back slightly, letting the noise of the cafeteria fade into background chatter. It was nice—just existing in the moment without having to think too hard about anything.

 

But then, N’s voice cut through the comfortable haze.

 

“So,” he said casually, “how’re you doing?”

 

Uzi blinked, caught slightly off guard by the question. She hadn’t really expected N to start a conversation, though she supposed she should’ve. It wasn’t like he was acting weird or anything. Just… normal.

 

Still chewing, she lifted a hand over her mouth before answering, her voice slightly muffled. “I’m fine. Just tired.”

 

N gave a sympathetic look, his usual warmth present in his expression. “Did you not sleep well?”

 

Uzi swallowed before responding, shrugging slightly. “Stayed up playing video games. Lost track of time.”

 

N laughed softly, shaking his head. “Of course you did.” His tone wasn’t teasing—just fond amusement. But then he tilted his head slightly, his voice carrying that natural kindness he always had. “You should probably work on that, though.”

 

Uzi didn’t hear any hint of scolding in his voice, just genuine concern. He wasn’t wrong, but still. She merely huffed, before she took another bite of her sandwich.

 

Uzi’s gaze lingered on N’s face as he sat there, looking like he was about to say something. But before the words left his mouth, her thoughts started to drift.

 

There was just something about him, something in the way his eyes shone with warmth, how his smile—just a little shy, just a little uncertain—felt so real. It wasn’t like usual; usually, she didn’t think twice about it. He always had that calm, genuine energy, the kind of presence that felt like the world was just a little lighter when he was around.

 

But today? Today, something about the way he was looking at her was making her stomach twist. It wasn’t a sense of awkwardness — No, this was different. It felt almost… warm. Like the kind of warmth that comes when you’re around someone who cares, someone who really sees  you. Uzi couldn’t pinpoint exactly what this feeling was, but it was there, settling deep in her chest, making her heart beat just a little bit faster.

 

She shifted slightly, trying to shake the sensation off, but it clung to her, a gentle discomfort she didn’t quite understand. She couldn’t remember the last time she felt like this… or if she ever had. That sudden realization only made it worse.

 

And then, just as the moment stretched on, N spoke again, calling her name softly, pulling her out of her thoughts.

 

“Uzi?”

 

She blinked, quickly refocusing as N repeated himself, the question hanging in the air.

 

“Has V talked to you yet?”

 

Uzi snapped back to reality, forcing herself to concentrate, unsure of how to respond.

 

She paused, her mind still processing N's words. Furrowing her brows in confusion and turned to him, asking, “What do you mean?”

 

N, sensing her confusion, nodded slightly, his gaze thoughtful as he explained further. “I mean, like, in general. I’m just wondering if she’s tried to talk to you about anything... you know, about everything that’s been going on.”

 

She hesitated for a moment, thinking before she continued, “No… not really,” she replied, her voice almost a question. “Should I be expecting her to?”

 

N shrugged, his expression somewhat relaxed yet serious. “Probably. Knowing V, she’s not one to just sit back and let things happen without understanding them first.” He glanced around briefly before meeting her eyes again, a small, knowing smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “She’ll probably try to talk to you, maybe... scope things out, I guess. Figure out who you are, where you stand.”

 

Uzi’s brow furrowed even deeper, uncertainty creeping into her thoughts. The idea of V approaching her, especially with everything that had happened recently, didn’t sit well with her. “That sounds... kinda weird,” she muttered, shifting slightly, her thoughts racing. She then paused, her voice quiet but laced with concern. “Is that a bad thing?”

 

N met her gaze, his eyes soft, and he shook his head slowly. “No, not at all,” he reassured her, his tone sincere. “V’s not going to do anything other than talk to you. I know her, she just wants to understand things better.”

 

Uzi let out a long sigh, the weight of everything pressing down on her. She leaned her head back against the wall, her eyes briefly closing in frustration. “This is so annoying,” she muttered, barely loud enough for him to hear. “I just wish I could forget all of it... forget everything that happened.”

 

N’s gaze softened further, his expression quiet and empathetic. He seemed to understand what she was feeling, but there was a subtle hesitation in the way he looked at her, like he was unsure how to respond. It was clear that he wanted to offer comfort or say something reassuring, but the words didn’t come. Instead, he remained silent, just sitting there with her, offering his presence without pushing her any further.

 

Uzi felt the weight of his unspoken support, and it was enough—though not entirely comforting, it was a reminder that she wasn’t entirely alone in this. But she couldn’t quite shake the frustration, nor the strange warmth that had lingered since their earlier exchange.

Notes:

Ok, so decided I was gonna post another one today

Tomorrow I’m only gonna post one chapter, though. I’ve been posting a bunch recently cuz like, where I am in the story rn that I’m writing, I’m *really* tryna figure out where to go from there

Obvi not gonna say a single thing abt the actual context, but I’m js at a point where the story can go in a million different ways, and I’m js trying to figure out what

So yeah basically I js need to lock in and focus on that 😭 Updates won’t be slowed or anything, I js don’t wanna catch up to where I am and now (like, I have about 10 chapters I haven’t posted? They’re completed, but not edited.) and then once I start writing more I’ll post a bit more in a day, yk?

Sorry for rambling, don’t really have anyone to tell so might as well js write it here 🥲

OK so back on topic of this actual chapter, this is the start to the 3rd arc! I’m debating on whether I wanna name them. When I finish this story in who knows how long from now, I’m gonna make like, a table of contents at the end with a timeline and bunch of summaries cuz like why not.

Also I feel so bad for Uzi - her chronic overthinking is so bad 😭🤚 The way I see Uzi, not only is she an overthinker, but she’s also dramatic asf so like when any small thing happens she’s gonna over analyze it and feel like it’s the end of the world, but then literally nothing is wrong and she’s fine. And when she realizes that she’s overthinking she feels stupid 💀 — She probably needs someone to call her out on this, but she’s so in her head all the time that she doesn’t even talk abt it.
What do yall think abt that characterization of her? Personally, I feel like that fits her, and idk if *that* specific aspect abt her is cannon or not.

Ok, that’s all. Byeee

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you

Chapter 34: Deviation

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi made her way through the bustling hallway, her steps more purposeful than usual as the end of lunch gave way the usual quick passing period. She wasn’t exactly in a hurry to get to her next class—not yet, at least. Her mind still buzzed from the lunch conversation, and there was this lingering sensation in the pit of her stomach that she couldn’t quite shake. She needed a moment to herself, a break from everything. She didn’t have to go to the bathroom, but the opportunity for a brief escape was too good to pass up.

 

The thought of taking a breath, of stepping away from the usual pressure, felt like a small but necessary relief. The teacher in her next class was pretty laid-back about tardies, so why not take advantage of that? There was no harm in it, right? A chance to reset, gather her thoughts, and give herself a moment before the next stretch of classes. Uzi sighed, letting the tension in her shoulders ease as she reached the bathroom door.

 

With a quick glance around to make sure no one was in the hall at the moment, she pushed the door open, stepping inside. The cool, somewhat sterile air of the bathroom greeted her, and Uzi immediately felt the tension in her chest ease just a little more. This was just a quick pit stop—just a small break from the constant rush. And for now, that was all she needed.

 

As Uzi stepped into the bathroom, she was relieved to find it empty, save for one other student finishing up by the sinks. The girl quickly washed her hands and walked past Uzi without a word, leaving her with the quiet solitude she’d been craving. Uzi couldn’t help but sigh in relief. Finally, some space to breathe, away from the constant noise and tension.

 

She walked up to the mirror, setting her bag down on the counter beside her. She gazed at her reflection for a moment, feeling the weight of the past few hours settle on her shoulders. Her hair had had became messier than usual— there were stands sticking up in odd places, and the bone hairclips she had on were now crooked, one of them half-falling out.

 

With a quiet groan, Uzi pulled the clips out, tossing them gently on the counter. Her fingers ran through her hair, ruffling it to give it a bit more freedom, and tame the loose strands. She studied her reflection again, the messiness oddly comforting. Much better, she thought to herself, before carefully putting the clips back in place. It wasn’t much, but it felt like a small step toward getting her bearings again. Just one more thing to do, one more way to re-center herself before heading back into the chaos of the day.

 

Uzi's brief moment of peace was abruptly shattered as the bathroom door swung open with a loud bang, a group of girls crowding in. The sound of their chatter filled the space, and Uzi's body stiffened. She froze, not entirely sure how to respond or where to go. Her thoughts immediately flitted to the fact that this was supposed to be her quiet time, her moment to reset before the next period. But that illusion of calm was gone in an instant.

 

The girls, clearly in a rush, headed straight to the largest stall at the far end, their voices growing muffled as they squeezed into the small space and slammed the door behind them. Uzi noticed the way they crowded in, immediately feeling a twinge of discomfort. Then came the unmistakable scent of synthetic mango, followed by a thick, acrid haze of smoke rising up from the stall, dissipating into the air. Great. Vaping, of course. It was always the same crowd. Uzi’s jaw clenched, the irritation bubbling up quickly. She hated this. It was a violation of the one place she could claim as her own.

 

But before she could let herself get too angry about it, the rest of the group was already making their way toward her. Her stomach twisted in response, knowing she was going to be caught in whatever nonsense was coming her way. And that was when she felt it—an arm, heavy and overbearing, sliding across her shoulders with far more force than necessary.

 

Uzi stilled, muscles tensing, the urge to flinch almost unbearable. She swallowed her reaction, determined not to show weakness, but it was hard to keep her composure when the arm wasn’t exactly a comfort. Her heart dropped into her stomach when she realized who it was. The weight on her shoulder didn’t feel friendly or accidental. It was V.

 

V’s voice broke through Uzi’s thoughts, and she glanced up, trying to mask her annoyance. "Hey," V said, her tone dripping with false cheer. She didn’t sound like someone who had tried to kill Uzi just a few days ago. In fact, she made it sound like they were the best of friends. "What’s up? What are you up to?"

 

Uzi blinked, disoriented for a moment. V was smiling like she had no idea what had happened between them, as if their brief history hadn’t been marked with aggression and tension. Uzi couldn’t help the instinctive grimace that tugged at her features. This is… weird, she thought, desperately trying to process the situation. What was this about? What did V want from her?

 

Uzi’s stomach twisted as V’s arm still lingered around her shoulder. It wasn’t gentle or comforting, just heavy and uncomfortably close. The way it was wrapped around her felt too possessive, too in control. Uzi forced herself to breathe deeply, trying not to let the tension leak into her voice. She turned her head slightly, meeting V’s eyes, and spoke as nonchalantly as she could manage.

 

“I was about to go to class,” she said, trying to sound like this was just another mundane detail of her day.

 

She moved, slowly, purposefully, trying not to make a big deal of pulling away from V’s grasp. The motion was subtle, but V’s grip stayed firm for just a moment longer, as though she were testing her—testing Uzi’s reaction. Uzi’s heart skipped in her chest as she felt V's fingers flex briefly before they finally loosened. It wasn’t a smooth release; it was more like V had allowed her to move, but the lingering pressure was still there, like a quiet threat. The silence between them was thick, but Uzi bit back anything else she might have wanted to say, because the last thing she needed was to provoke V any further.

 

Before she could leave, one of the other girls there, Lizzy, broke the tension with a sharp voice.

 

“You two are friends now?” Lizzy’s tone was playful but edged with curiosity. She tilted her head, raising an eyebrow as she glanced between the two of them. “When did that happen?”

 

Uzi froze, her heart still racing in her chest, as V immediately responded, crossing her arms with an exaggerated smirk that made Uzi’s skin crawl.

 

“We’ve been getting to know each other better recently,” V said, her voice dripping with that same, unsettling sweetness.

 

As if to emphasize her point, V lightly nudged Uzi with her foot. It wasn’t exactly a casual tap. No, it felt more like a warning, a push, a command to play along. Uzi could feel her oil run cold at the pressure. For a split second, she considered resisting, glaring at V, but she quickly squashed that thought down.

 

Uzi’s lips pulled into a small, forced smile, one that didn’t reach her eyes, and she nodded slightly. "Yeah, guess we’ve talked more," she muttered, barely above a whisper, keeping her tone neutral, her voice tight.

 

Her words hung in the air, as false as the smile she wore, but the last thing she wanted was to make things worse. V’s eyes were locked on her, like she was daring her to act out. Uzi’s gaze flickered away from her, trying to focus on the ground, then back to Lizzy, who was looking at her with an unreadable expression. The situation felt suffocating, like she was caught in the middle of something she didn’t want to be a part of.

 

Lizzy’s gaze lingered on Uzi, her expression unreadable at first—something between curiosity and suspicion. Uzi felt her pulse quicken, a tightness settling in her chest as she held her breath, waiting for whatever Lizzy might say next. Had she sounded unnatural? Was her hesitation too obvious?

 

Then, Lizzy’s lips curved into a relaxed smile, her suspicion melting away in an instant. “Huh. Yeah, that makes sense,” she said lightly, nodding as if the whole thing was completely reasonable.

 

Uzi resisted the urge to let out a breath of relief. Somehow, Lizzy had bought it—completely.

 

Steeling herself, Uzi flicked a glance toward V, who was watching the exchange with a smug look, like a queen satisfied with the way her game was playing out. Uzi felt a deep, crawling discomfort settle in her gut. She was desperate to get out of here, to be anywhere but stuck in this suffocating exchange.

 

Forcing a small, strained laugh, Uzi shifted her bag over her shoulder. “Well, I should probably get going,” she said, trying to sound casual, even as tension gripped her body. “Wouldn’t want to be more late than I already am.”

 

The second the words left her mouth, she felt the weight of V’s gaze on her again. There was something unsettling about the way V smiled—too polite, too composed, like she was playing along with some joke only she was in on.

 

“Of course,” V said smoothly, tilting her head ever so slightly. “I’ll see you later then, Uzi.”

 

She lifted a hand in a small wave, the motion deceptively friendly.

 

Uzi gave the barest nod in response, before turning toward the door, forcing herself to keep her pace controlled. The last thing she wanted was to look like she was running away—even if that’s exactly what she wanted to do.

 

The moment she stepped out into the hallway, she felt like she could finally breathe again

 

-

 

The rest of the day crawled by at a painfully slow pace, each class blurring together into the same dull routine. Uzi tried to push her earlier encounter with V out of her mind, but it lingered like an itch she couldn’t scratch. There was something about the way V had looked at her—like she was sizing her up, like Uzi couldn’t remotely compare to her.

 

Of course, V’s sudden interest in her had nothing to do with actually wanting to be friends. That much was obvious. The only reason she was even acknowledging Uzi was because of what she knew—because she was aware of whatever the hell was going on with these so-called ‘Disassembly Drones.’ And even though Uzi had been trying to make sense of the whole situation, none of it felt real. Just a few days ago, this had been nothing more than a normal, boring school life. Now? She was suddenly tangled up in something way bigger than herself, something she didn’t fully understand, and the worst part was that she had no idea what to expect next.

 

Then, finally, the last bell rang, signaling the end of the day.

 

For a split second, relief flooded her system. She was free. She could go home, put on some music, maybe play a few games and—

 

Oh.

 

The realization hit her like a brick.

 

Detention.

 

Any ounce of relief she had felt instantly drained away, leaving behind nothing but exhaustion and defeat. She had no way out of it; skipping would only get her into more trouble, and knowing her luck, she’d end up with a lunch detention instead—arguably worse.

 

With a heavy sigh, she gathered her things, her movements sluggish and reluctant. It was like she could already feel the dull, agonizing boredom of the next hour creeping up on her. Just great. Absolutely fantastic.

 

Dragging her feet, she trudged toward her inevitable fate—detention.

 

Notes:

I’m so excited to post the next few chapters, this whole arc is my favorite so far I can promise u it’s gonna get so good

I think this chapter is the most V has spoken in this fic so far. She’s gonna have a lot more dialogue soon, so that’s fun (no spoilers though 🤭)

This is random, but I feel like V would hang around the ‘vape girls’ in high school, yk? Like, yk how irl there’s always *that* group of girls who will go into the big stall in the bathroom and vape 😭🤚

But V isn’t obnoxious or annoying abt it though like some people are, she’s js kind of there chilling and hangs around people like that. Lizzy, though, on the other hand doesn’t vape and is in the group of more *popular girls*, but they mingle with that other group ig and like V and Lizzy are super close as well. ((To describe what I mean by popular girls, I mean like the people who make fun of “emo” people, if that makes sense. Like, they’re not directly rude or anything, but they ask u weird ass questions like you’re from some other planet (speaking from experience 😭) And god forbid that they think you’re pretty, cuz they’ll talk major shit abt you just because.)) Ik she hasn’t been mentioned much, but as for J, she seems like someone who would have being associated with people like that (specifically the vape girls) but she’s friends with V so like it’s kinda impossible to not be around those people (or drones ig.) J will be more relevant soon and also *spoilers* but we’re gonna meet V’s whole friend group and you’ll js get a better idea of how those character dynamics are yk. I can promise u thought that her main friend group isn’t a bunch of vape girls though 💀

V is js like, overall chill and kind of hangs out with anyone who’s kinda considered popular, not because she’s trying to stand out and be all that, but js because she’s trying does what she wants and doesn’t gaf abt what anyone says. People def respect her for that and that’s why she’s so ‘popular.’ This girl has major aura for literally no reason 😭🤚

Ok enough of me rambling abt stereotypes - next chapter is gonna be published tomorrow. Super excited! Oh and also I finally figured out where I’m gonna go with the story (in the much later chapters) so for the next 2 days, I’m gonna post just 1 chapter, but after that I’ll probably post 2 or more a day again, depending on if I have the time. Can 100% promise though that at *least* one will be posted a day

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 35: RSVP

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi stepped into the detention room, immediately noticing the stark contrast to her last experience here. This time, there was no absent teacher, no whispered conversations or distractions—just quiet. The kind of stiff, enforced silence that made the room feel heavier than it was.

 

Her eyes scanned the room, taking in the handful of students scattered around. That was when she spotted a familiar face—Thad.

 

He was hunched over a book, holding it up as if he were deeply engrossed in whatever it was about. But it only took Uzi half a second to realize what he was actually doing. Behind the book, partially hidden from sight, was his phone. Classic.

 

Thad’s eyes flicked up, meeting hers. The moment he recognized her, his face lit up, and he sent her a small, overly enthusiastic wave—one that felt way too cheerful given the circumstances.

 

Uzi rolled her eyes. Idiot. She wasn’t exactly in the mood to be greeted like that, especially by the same drone who got her into this mess. Still, as she scanned the room for an empty seat, her options weren’t great.

 

One choice was that group—the kids who basically had a permanent residency in detention. The ones who either didn’t care or just liked getting in trouble. Sitting with them would be a nightmare.

 

The other choice? Thad.

 

Uzi sighed internally. As irritated as she was at him, she’d rather sit with him than subject herself to whatever chaos that group had going on. Begrudgingly, she started toward Thad’s table, accepting her fate.

 

As soon as Uzi dropped into the seat beside him, Thad turned to her with a smirk, his expression practically dripping with amusement.

 

“Well, well, well,”  he murmured, leaning slightly toward her. “Look who decided to join me.” His tone was cocky, like he’d been expecting her all along.

 

Before Uzi could even think of a response, a loud, sharp shh! cut through the quiet.

 

Both of them snapped their heads toward the teacher at the front of the room, who was now glaring directly at Thad. His expression carried the kind of tired exasperation that suggested he dealt with drones like Thad way too often.

 

Thad blinked, looking like a kid caught red-handed, and quickly muttered, “Sorry.” But the second the teacher turned his attention elsewhere, Thad rolled his eyes, clearly unfazed.

 

Uzi just stared at him, unamused. Why is he like this?

 

Deciding it was best to just ignore him, she pulled her bag onto her lap and unzipped it. There was no way she was actually going to do any work—she wasn’t in the mood, and it wasn’t like she had anything urgent to finish. Instead, she pulled out her sketchbook and flipped it open, letting her pencil glide across the paper. It was mindless, relaxing.

 

Minutes passed in near silence, only the faint scratching of pencils and the occasional shifting of drones in their seats filling the air.

 

Then, about fifteen minutes in, the teacher stood up from his desk with a sigh.

 

“I’ll be back in a few minutes,” he announced, his voice firm as he scanned the room. “And I better not hear about anyone doing anything other than their assigned work.”

 

Without waiting for a response, he turned and walked out, the door clicking shut behind him.

 

The second he was gone, the atmosphere in the room changed.

 

As soon as the door shut behind the teacher, a quiet but noticeable shift spread through the room. The tension of forced silence eased, and most of the drones, save for a handful, wasted no time abandoning their seats. They gathered toward the back of the room in a loose huddle, some pulling out their phones while others whispered and laughed amongst themselves. A few were more brazen, shoving each other playfully or tapping out quick messages on their screens, clearly not concerned about being caught. The hum of hushed conversation and the occasional muffled snicker filled the air.

 

Meanwhile, Thad stayed put, leaning back in his chair with a lazy stretch. He locked his hands behind his head and shot Uzi a sideways glance, smirking.

 

“So,” he said casually, his voice carrying an unmistakable teasing edge. “How are you enjoying detention so far?”

 

Uzi, still focused on her sketchbook, let out a sharp exhale through her nose. She could tell he was just trying to get under her plating for the fun of it. Without looking up, she responded with dry sarcasm.

 

“Oh, fantastic," she deadpanned. "Best part of my day, really.” Then she flicked her gaze toward him and added with an exaggerated sweetness, “I really appreciate you getting me this detention, by the way.”

 

Thad grinned, unfazed. “Anytime.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes, turning back to her sketchbook. Of course he’d say that.

 

After a brief lull in their conversation, Thad broke the silence again, his tone casual but carrying just enough curiosity to show he was actually interested.

 

"So, you going to the party this weekend?"

 

Uzi didn’t even bother looking up from her sketchbook. She blinked, her pencil hovering mid-stroke. Party?

 

She gave him a flat glance. "What party?"

 

Thad looked at her like she had just said something incomprehensible. His eyes widened in exaggerated disbelief.

 

"Wait—you  haven’t heard?" he asked, completely floored.

 

Uzi, unimpressed by his reaction, simply raised a brow. "Gee, Thad. It’s almost like I’m not the most popular drone in school," she shot back dryly.

 

Still looking mildly baffled, Thad leaned forward, resting his elbows on the desk. "Lizzy’s Sweet Seventeen. She’s throwing this huge party at her place."

 

Uzi furrowed her brows. Sweet Seventeen?That didn’t sound right.

 

"Don’t you mean Sweet Sixteen?" she asked skeptically.

 

Thad shook his head, looking amused now. "Nope. She’s turning seventeen." He leaned back in his seat again, shrugging. "She had a Sweet Sixteen last year, and I guess since it was such a blast, she figured—why not do it again?"

 

Uzi exhaled sharply, not even trying to hide her unimpressed expression. " That sounds cheesy," she muttered, twirling her pencil between her fingers.

 

Thad just smirked, undeterred. "Nah, it’s gonna be great." He leaned toward her slightly, as if trying to convince her. "Trust me, Uzi, you don’t wanna miss it."

 

Thad leaned back in his chair, a grin creeping onto his face as he reminisced.

 

"I went to her party last year," he said, sounding almost proud of it. "It was insane. Like, at one point, some idiot tried to do a backflip off the couch and completely wiped out, took a whole coffee table down with him." He laughed at the memory, shaking his head. "Then, later, some dude started freestyle rapping horribly in the kitchen, and somehow it turned into an all-out rap battle. It was actually kinda legendary."

 

Uzi remained unimpressed, though she had to admit the mental image was at least mildly amusing.

 

"And this year?" Thad continued, his tone gaining a hint of excitement. "Even better. Lizzy’s parents won’t be home this time."

 

That made Uzi pause. She tilted her head slightly, still skeptical but now at least a little curious. "How does that make it better?" she asked, arms crossing loosely. "If they’re already letting her throw a party in the first place, why does it matter if they’re home or not?"

 

Thad smirked, as if she had just walked right into his point. "Because," he said, drawing out the word. "There’s gonna be booze."

 

Uzi blinked, then scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Oh, wow. Yeah, ‘underage drinking’—totally my thing," she deadpanned, sarcasm clear in her tone.

 

Thad just shrugged, completely unfazed. "Hey, you do you," he said, leaning back again. "But I’m telling you, it’s gonna be fun."

 

Uzi sat in silence for a moment, weighing her options. This whole thing sounded ridiculous. But then again… what else did she have to do? It wasn’t like she had any grand weekend plans lined up. And if nothing else, it could at least be interesting.

 

She exhaled through her nose, tilting her head slightly as she looked at Thad. "I’ll… consider it," she said, keeping her tone neutral, not wanting to sound too eager. What she didn’t say was that she had already made up her mind—she was going.

 

Thad, catching onto her hesitation, grinned. "You totally should," he encouraged.

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes slightly. "But like… everyone’s invited? For sure?" she clarified. If she was walking into some exclusive, drama-filled mess, she wanted to know in advance.

 

Thad nodded confidently. "Yep. That’s the best part," he said, leaning forward slightly. "Lizzy doesn’t do those lame, ‘invite-only’ kind of things. If you know about it, you can show up."

 

Before Uzi could reply, movement from the door caught her attention. A shadow flickered across the frosted glass window, and in an instant, the entire room reacted.

 

Drones who had been slouched over their desks suddenly sat up straight. The group in the back scattered like roaches, diving into their seats in record time. Phones vanished into pockets. It was almost comical how fast the energy in the room shifted.

 

The door handle turned, and the teacher stepped inside. His eyes swept over the room with thinly veiled suspicion, like he knew exactly what had been going on but didn’t have the energy to care. With a tired sigh, he muttered something under his breath—something that sounded an awful lot like unbelievable—before making his way back to his desk. He clicked on his computer, the faint hum of the monitor filling the otherwise silent room.

 

And just like that, detention resumed.

 

As Uzi continued to sketch, her thoughts wandered. A party. It wasn’t something she would have even considered before. Before, it would’ve just been another social event where she’d linger awkwardly on the sidelines, counting the minutes until she could leave, then spend the rest of the night overanalyzing everything she did or said.

 

But… things were different now.

 

She had friends—actual, real friends. Thad, N, Rebecca, Darren, Emily… somehow, they had all become a part of her life. And with them, the idea of going to a party didn’t seem miserable anymore. It didn’t seem like something she had to survive—it actually sounded… fun. Maybe even exciting.

 

She thought back to Thad’s enthusiasm, the way he had described last year’s party as an absolute blast. For once, she didn’t doubt that he was right.

 

A small, almost subconscious smile crept onto her face as she kept drawing. Yeah… this was going to be great.

Notes:

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 36: Intrusion

Notes:

Tbh couldn’t think of what else to do for the rest of the week in the story (cuz that would probably all end up being filler ig.) so here’s a time skip. But I’m gonna add some flashbacks this chapter so that’ll be great

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The week had been a strange contradiction—dragging on endlessly in the moment but somehow slipping away the second she stopped to think about it. Monday felt like a lifetime ago, yet here she was, already at the end of Friday, lying in bed as if the days had just blurred together. It was exhausting in a way she couldn't quite explain, like her brain hadn’t fully caught up with how fast everything was moving.

 

With a quiet sigh, Uzi set her phone down on the nightstand, suddenly tired of mindlessly scrolling. She had been staring at it for way too long, doing nothing of real importance, and the dull ache in her head told her it was time to stop. She pushed herself upright, stretching her stiff joints before swinging her legs over the side of the bed. Might as well get up—brush her teeth, wash her face, actually do something productive before calling it a night.

 

Padding over to the bathroom, she flicked on the light and was met with her reflection in the mirror. She studied herself for a moment, tilting her head slightly. Not terrible, but the longer she looked, the more she noticed—the tiredness in her eyes, the slight messiness of her hair underneath her beanie. She pulled it off, only to be met with the absolute disaster that was hat hair. Great.

 

Shaking her head, she reached for her brush, quickly running it through her hair to fix the flattened, uneven strands. The repetitive motion was almost soothing, giving her a moment to gather her thoughts. This week had been… a lot. And tomorrow? That party? She still wasn’t sure how she felt about it.

 

Uzi grabbed her toothbrush, squeezing a line of toothpaste onto the bristles before bringing it to her mouth. As she brushed, the rhythmic motion of it did little to quiet her thoughts. Her mind drifted back over the past week—nothing too eventful, just the usual routine of classes, boredom, and dealing with the occasional annoyance. But what stood out most was how quickly everyone else seemed to have moved on. The talk of the murdered student had faded, replaced by the usual school gossip, as if it had never even happened.

 

Uzi swallowed hard, her grip tightening slightly around the toothbrush. But it did happen. And she knew who was responsible. The memory of V’s smug face in that bathroom, acting like they were friends, sent a flicker of anger through her. How was she just supposed to ignore that? How was she supposed to stay quiet, knowing V had gotten away with it? Maybe she should go to the authorities—turn V in, maybe even J too. J had to be guilty of something as well, right? They were both Disassembly Drones. It wasn’t hard to put two and two together.

 

But then, another thought crept in, one that made her pause. N.

 

The anger drained from her as quickly as it had come. N was one of them too. And yeah… she was pretty much certain that he had killed drones before. He did mention that he needed to drink oil to literally survive. But could she really bring herself to turn him in? To watch him get locked away alongside the others?

 

She nearly shuddered at the thought. It was ridiculous in a way—N, in jail? It didn’t feel right. She tried to picture it, but it just didn’t fit. But that was the problem, wasn’t it? Because if she exposed V and J, there was no way N would be left out of it. He would go down with them, whether he deserved to or not.

 

Uzi exhaled sharply through her nose, shaking her head as if that would clear the thoughts away. It was frustrating, knowing what V did but feeling powerless to do anything about it. But for now… she pushed the thought aside. She just needed to get through the night without overthinking everything.

 

Uzi could feel the sharp sting of mint coating her tongue, the sensation growing almost unbearable. She quickly leaned over the sink, spitting out the foam before cupping water into her hands and rinsing her mouth. The sharp coolness lingered, but at least it wasn’t burning anymore. She straightened, placing her toothbrush and toothpaste back in their spot before reaching for her face wash.

 

Her thoughts, however, didn’t stray from V.

 

Monday wasn’t the only time she had spoken to her that week. No, V had made a point of approaching her again—and not just once. Uzi wasn’t sure what was worse: V’s presence itself or the fact that she had no idea what V wanted from her. That interaction in the bathroom had been unsettling enough, but things only got weirder from there.

 

She thought back to Wednesday.

 

 

Uzi had been heading to the cafeteria, her usual route leading her straight to her group. Before, lunch had just been another one of those periods she dreaded - sitting by herself, feeling like an outcast. But now, lunchtime was the one part of the day she actually looked forward to.

 

But just as she was about to make her way over, someone stepped directly into her path, forcing her to stop short.

 

V.

 

Uzi blinked, taking a moment to process why V was just standing there, alone, in her way. Her first instinct was suspicion. Whatever this was, it definitely wasn’t just a friendly chat. Raising an eyebrow, Uzi folded her arms, eyeing her warily. “Can I help you with something?” she asked, making no effort to hide her confusion—or her irritation.

 

V let out an exaggerated sigh, shaking her head as if this whole thing annoyed her just as much. “Look,” she started, her tone blunt and to the point, “I don’t want to talk to you any more than you want to talk to me.”

 

Uzi’s glare deepened. “Then don’t?”

 

V ignored that, continuing, “But since you know about us, I have to ‘monitor’ you.” Her voice dripped with boredom, as if this was nothing more than a chore she was being forced to do.

 

Uzi clenched her teeth, but she didn’t need to ask what ‘us’ meant. She already knew.

 

V, J, and N.

 

Frustration flared up inside her. This was ridiculous. “Why can’t you just leave me alone?” she snapped, already exhausted by the conversation.

 

V rolled her eyes, crossing her arms. “You think I want to be doing this?” she shot back. “I don’t have much of a choice.”

 

Uzi wasn’t sure what pissed her off more—the fact that V was suddenly monitoring her, or the fact that she acted like this was some huge inconvenience for her.

 

Uzi scoffed, shifting her weight to one side as she folded her arms. “Yeah, clearly you’re not thrilled about this,” she muttered, eyeing V with thinly veiled annoyance. She could sort of understand why V was acting this way—it wasn’t like either of them wanted to be in this situation. But still, this whole thing was getting ridiculous. “Look,” Uzi continued, her tone firm but exasperated, “I’m not going to tell anyone. I haven’t. And I’m not planning to—ever. So maybe, I don’t know, relax?

 

V exhaled sharply through her nose, tilting her head slightly. “Yeah, I get that,” she admitted, though her voice carried the same dismissive edge as before. She eyed Uzi, almost as if assessing her, then gave a small shrug. “And I kind of believe you.”

 

That only made Uzi’s irritation spike further. She let out an incredulous laugh, shaking her head. “Then why—”

 

Before she could finish, V cut her off. “Because of J.”

 

Uzi’s mouth shut. For a second, she was caught off guard, but before she could ask what that even meant, V continued, already anticipating her reaction.

 

“I have to make sure J doesn’t find out,” she said, her smirk fading slightly, her tone turning more serious. “Because if she does…” V’s expression darkened just a little as she looked Uzi directly in the eye. “She’ll kill you.”

 

The words hit Uzi like a gut punch, her irritation instantly draining into something heavier.

 

Fear.

 

She didn’t show it—she refused to show it. Instead, she kept her expression blank, eyes narrowing slightly, lips pressed into a thin, unamused line. But inside, her mind was racing.

 

She’d figured J wasn’t exactly a good drone, but hearing that outright—that J would kill her, without hesitation, if she knew Uzi had this information—was something else entirely.

 

V exhaled sharply, her expression twisting into something that was equal parts irritation and indifference. “Honestly? I would’ve gladly just killed you myself.”

 

Uzi’s eyes flickered with unease, but before she could react, V continued, rolling her eyes with a begrudging sigh. “But, I promised that babbling idiot N I wouldn’t.”

 

A dry, humorless laugh escaped Uzi’s mouth,“Wow. That’s… so comforting.” Her voice dripped with sarcasm, but V didn’t even acknowledge it.

 

Instead, V dragged a hand down her face in frustration, shaking her head. “Just hear me out, okay?” she said, her tone a little more serious now. She let her hand fall back to her side before folding her arms. “All you have to do is pretend we’re friends for a little while—until this whole thing blows over.”

 

She hesitated for a brief moment, as if debating how much to say next, then exhaled. “J’s been suspicious.” V’s usual smug expression faded slightly, replaced with something more calculating. “She’s got pretty good intuition—too good, honestly. She knows something’s up.”

 

Uzi’s stomach twisted, but she stayed silent, listening.

 

V leaned in slightly, lowering her voice. “And she’s noticed you hanging around N a lot. A lot.” She arched an eyebrow. “So, she might start assuming things. And that? That would be bad for both of us.”

 

Uzi swallowed hard but masked her nerves, simply narrowing her eyes.

 

“That’s why we have to act like nothing is out of the ordinary,” V continued, tilting her head slightly. “Just… play along. Be ‘friends’ for a bit. Once J moves on to something else, we drop the act, and pretend that this whole thing never happened.”

 

She stepped back, giving Uzi an expectant look, as if daring her to protest.

 

Uzi hesitated, her thoughts spinning. As much as she hated to admit it, V had a point. This wasn’t just some unnecessary power move—there was logic behind it. Uzi knew V wasn’t doing this because she wanted to, and in some weird, frustrating way, she could appreciate that. If V really wanted to, she could’ve just eliminated the problem—eliminated her—but instead, she was making an effort to keep things under control.

 

Uzi sighed, crossing her arms. “Ugh… Fine.” Her tone was begrudging, but there was no real fight behind it. “I guess you do have a point.”

 

V gave her a knowing smirk, as if she had already expected Uzi to come around.

 

Uzi sighed again, rubbing the back of her head. “But how exactly are we supposed to pull this off?” She narrowed her eyes. “What, do we just suddenly act buddy-buddy out of nowhere?”

 

V shrugged. “First things first, you’re sitting with us at lunch.”

 

Uzi’s expression immediately soured. “Oh, no. I agreed to this whole ‘pretend friends’ thing, not to changing my entire routine.”

 

V rolled her eyes, already looking exasperated. “It’s one lunch, calm down.”

 

Before Uzi could argue further, V suddenly grabbed her wrist and started walking, pulling her along.

 

Uzi stumbled slightly, eyes widening in surprise. “Hey—!”

 

V didn’t even glance back. “Relax, it’s one time. You need to meet J anyway, or this isn’t going to look convincing.”

 

Uzi yanked her wrist out of V’s grip—not aggressively, just firmly enough to get her point across. She half-expected V to retaliate by grabbing her harder, but to her relief, V simply let go.

 

Still annoyed but knowing she had no real way out of this, Uzi huffed. “Fine.” She trailed slightly behind V, arms crossed, trying to suppress the irritation still lingering in her chest.

 

As V led her closer to the table, Uzi felt the weight of several pairs of eyes shifting onto her. Sitting there were Lizzy, J, and three other drones Uzi didn’t recognize. The way they all looked up at her, slightly puzzled, made her instantly self-conscious.

 

Uzi forced a casual smile, lifting her hand in a halfhearted wave. Just act normal. First impressions matter. She had no idea how long she’d have to keep up this whole “friend” act, but if she was going to be around these drones, she at least wanted to start off on the right foot.

 

V, completely unbothered, gestured vaguely toward Uzi as she spoke. “This is Uzi. She’s sitting with us today.”

 

No one objected, which was a relief. At least she wasn’t being immediately interrogated.

 

Taking that as her cue, Uzi pulled out a chair and sat down. Almost immediately, the others began introducing themselves.

 

The first to speak was J. She leaned back slightly, arms crossed, expression unreadable. “J.” That was all she said—just her name. No extra words, no effort to be friendly.

 

Uzi studied her for a moment, realizing that, despite everything, she had never actually met J in person before. And even though J came off as casual, Uzi could tell she was watching her carefully, sizing her up. Was she trying to read her?

 

Yeah. Probably.

 

Uzi quickly pushed the thought aside and looked to the next drone who spoke—Lizzy.

 

“Hey,” Lizzy greeted with a small smile. “I mean, I already know you.”

 

Uzi nodded. That was true. She and Lizzy had talked a few times, but they weren’t friends—more like casual acquaintances. Still, Uzi knew better than to let her guard down around her. She’d heard the rumors. Lizzy was the kind of drone who could be sweet to your face but would talk about you the second you turned your back.

 

Even so, Uzi wasn’t about to start anything. She just needed to play along and not draw any unnecessary attention to herself.

 

The next drone to speak was a boy sitting across from her. He leaned back in his chair, looking entirely at ease, as if he had no care in the world. His beanie sat low over his head, completely covering his hair, and he wore an oversized sweater that looked like it had come straight from a thrift store—loose, slightly faded, but undeniably comfortable.

 

He gave Uzi a lazy nod, his expression relaxed, almost dazed. “Yo. I’m Sam.” His voice was slow and unhurried, like he was perpetually on the verge of either falling asleep or saying something profound.

 

Uzi wasn’t sure what to make of him yet, but he seemed easygoing. Maybe a little too easygoing.

 

Before she could dwell on it, her attention shifted to the next drone at the table—a girl who hadn’t spoken yet. She had long, sleek blue hair that cascaded past her shoulders and striking orange eyes that seemed to glow slightly under the cafeteria lights. She was wearing a fitted maroon zip up hoodie, a muted-orange shirt partially visible underneath it. She had on a black skirt and sheer stockings, paired with back boots. She also has a few silver necklaces on to complete the outfit.

 

When she finally spoke, it wasn’t in English, but in Russian.”Привет.” her voice soft was and measured.

 

Uzi hesitated for a second, processing. She didn’t know any Russian, but from the context, she assumed it was just a greeting.

 

The girl didn’t say anything else after that, her attention already shifting away as if she had fulfilled her obligation to acknowledge Uzi’s presence. From the way she carried herself—reserved, distant—it was clear she wasn’t the type to engage in conversation unless absolutely necessary. Uzi took note of that.

 

The last drone at the table finally spoke up, leaning forward slightly with an easygoing grin.

 

“Name’s Braidon,” he said, his tone confident—maybe a little too confident, like he expected his introduction to be more impressive than it actually was.

 

Uzi took a quick glance at him. He had messy black hair that looked like he had barely run a hand through it before showing up, and striking blue eyes that held a certain cocky energy. His posture was relaxed but assertive, like he was used to being the center of attention. The school’s football jersey clung to his frame, the team’s logo emblazoned on the front like a badge of honor.

 

With all the introductions finally out of the way, an inevitable silence settled over the table. The first to break it was J.

 

“So,” she started, tilting her head slightly as her sharp crimson eyes settled on Uzi. “How did you and V meet?”

 

Her voice was casual, but there was something beneath it—something subtle. A near-imperceptible suspicion. It wasn’t blatant, just a slight shift in the way she watched Uzi, like she was studying her reactions carefully. It was barely noticeable, but Uzi caught onto it.

 

Then again, she was expecting this. V had already warned her that J was intuitive, that she would pick up on even the smallest inconsistencies.

 

Uzi hesitated for a fraction of a second, then went with the first thing that came to mind.

 

“Through Lizzy,” she said, keeping her tone as nonchalant as possible.

 

Technically, it wasn’t a lie. In fact, the first time they had met was because of Lizzy. Uzi thought back to that moment—when she had found that love letter in her locker, addressed to V. She had just wanted to return it, but when she finally tracked V down, the other drone had barely cared.

 

Thinking about that now, Uzi felt a small flicker of irritation. Especially after learning that the one who had written the letter had been N.

 

She shoved the thought aside. She wasn’t about to relive that awkward revelation right now.

 

J’s electric yellow eyes narrowed slightly, her gaze unwavering as she studied Uzi. It was almost suffocating—like she was peeling back every layer, searching for something hidden beneath the surface. Uzi could feel the weight of her stare pressing down on her, and for a second, she thought she might crack under it.

 

But then, Lizzy spoke up, her voice cutting through the tension like a knife.

 

“Oh, yeah! I remember that,” Lizzy said with a light giggle, her eyes lighting up with amusement. She turned to Uzi with a curious smile. “So, what—did you two just hit it off after that?”

 

Uzi barely had time to register the question before V nodded, seamlessly picking up the conversation.

 

“Yeah, pretty much,” V said smoothly, leaning back in her seat with a simple shrug. “We exchanged numbers after that, started talking more, and, well… turns out we have a lot in common.”

 

Uzi nearly choked at how blatant the lie was, but she wasn’t about to correct her. Instead, she kept her expression carefully neutral, giving a slight nod as if confirming V’s words.

 

J lingered on them for a moment longer, her gaze sharp and calculating. But then, just as suddenly as it had come, the suspicion in her expression faded. She sat back, as if the explanation made perfect sense to her.

 

Uzi resisted the urge to sigh in relief, the tension slowly easing from her shoulders.

 

Lizzy leaned forward slightly, her usual smug smirk plastered across her face. “So, where’d you get your outfit? The Hot Topic bargain bin?” she asked, her tone dripping with amusement.

 

Uzi barely reacted, refusing to take the bait. Instead, she glanced down at her clothes, running a quick mental inventory of her outfit.

 

She was wearing a black and white band tee featuring Hole, the slightly faded graphic suggesting it had been well-worn. Over it, she had thrown on an oversized black hoodie, the fabric splattered with hand-painted bleach designs across the sleeves— which were a few abstract shapes and symbols. Her dark blue jeans were baggy and loose-fitting, one pocket adorned with a spiderweb she had drawn in pen when she had nothing better to do. Her shoes were black Converse, scuffed and worn down from years of use, covered in various pen sketches and tiny scribbles. Her fingers were adorned with rings—some still silver, some rusted. Around her neck hung a beaded necklace, simple but noticeable, with a small rabbit bone dangling from the end.

 

Without acknowledging Lizzy’s backhanded tone, Uzi simply responded, “Most of it’s thrifted. Jewelry’s from some shop online.” She kept her tone flat, uninterested in entertaining whatever game Lizzy was playing.

 

Before Lizzy could reply, Sam perked up, his expression lighting up with interest. “Oh, sick, I love thrifting,” he said, adjusting his beanie slightly. “Thrifted this whole outfit, actually.” He gestured vaguely at himself before leaning forward slightly. “Yo, we should go thrifting sometime.”

 

Uzi blinked, caught slightly off guard by how quickly he had thrown that out there. It felt like he had just said the first thing that popped into his head. She barely knew him—why was he already making plans?

 

She shrugged, playing it cool. “Maybe,” she said simply, not committing to anything.

 

Sam just grinned lazily, as if satisfied with that answer, and leaned back in his chair again.

 

Uzi wasn’t sure what to make of him yet.

 

Uzi flicked her gaze toward Lizzy, catching the subtle shift in her expression. There was a hint of something—embarrassment? Not the kind that came from regret, though. No, Lizzy wasn’t the type to feel bad about what she said. It was more like secondhand embarrassment, like she thought Uzi should feel ashamed of her outfit.

 

Uzi forced herself not to react. She had long since learned that giving drones like Lizzy the satisfaction of a response was a mistake. Instead, she let it roll off her back, acting like she hadn’t noticed.

 

Before the silence could stretch too long, Braidon spoke up, his tone casual but carrying an almost lazy curiosity. “Are you new here or something? Never seen you before.”

 

Uzi resisted the urge to scoff. Technically, he wasn’t wrong—she was new, but considering that half the school year had already passed, it felt like an odd observation. Besides, she had been around this group before, at least in passing. Braidon had definitely been sitting at this table the few times she had approached it in the past. He just hadn’t paid enough attention to actually register her existence until now.

 

She rubbed the back of her neck, shrugging slightly. “Yeah. Transferred here at the start of the year.” Her voice was even, but she couldn’t help but feel mildly irritated at the implication that she was invisible.

 

Braidon simply nodded, as if that answer made perfect sense, before casually taking a bite of his sandwich, looking entirely unbothered.

 

Uzi’s gaze shifted toward the quietest member of the group—Doll. She hadn’t said a word, but there was an amused look in her orange eyes, as if she were watching all of this unfold like it was some sort of entertainment. She was observing, taking everything in, but staying on the sidelines.

 

Uzi wasn’t sure whether that was a good or bad thing.

 

The conversation around the table picked up again, but Uzi found herself more of a bystander than a participant. Braidon and Sam were deep in a discussion about football—something about last week’s game and whether or not their team had gotten cheated. Lizzy, meanwhile, was subtly (or maybe not so subtly) flirting with Braidon, tossing in playful remarks and laughing a little too hard at his jokes. Across from them, J and V were murmuring about some English assignment, exchanging notes and halfhearted complaints about their teacher.

 

Uzi was just… there. Eating her food, listening but not engaging. She didn’t mind too much, though—it wasn’t like she had anything to add to any of these conversations. Every now and then, her eyes flickered to Doll, who was similarly quiet, seemingly content with just observing. Uzi felt a faint sense of empathy toward her. It was strange, sitting here with all these drones she barely knew, trying to blend in when she had no real reason to be here in the first place.

 

She was mid-bite into a grape when J’s voice cut through the chatter.

 

“So, how do you know N?” J asked, her tone casual but just sharp enough to carry an edge of curiosity. “I was just wondering since, y’know… I’m pretty good friends with him. But he’s never mentioned you before.”

 

Uzi almost choked on the grape.

 

She forced herself to swallow, resisting the immediate urge to scoff or narrow her eyes. J was testing her, that much was obvious. But despite knowing that, Uzi couldn’t ignore the slight sting in her words. Never mentioned me? That couldn’t be true… right? N didn’t seem like the type to just pretend she didn’t exist.

 

Uzi quickly shoved the thought aside, pushing away the tinge of hurt creeping in. She wasn’t going to let J get under her skin. If J was looking for a reaction, she wasn’t going to get one.

 

Uzi cleared her throat, keeping her expression neutral as she answered, "Oh, N? We met in detention a while ago. Just kind of happened, I guess. We've been friends since then." She kept her tone casual, as if it wasn’t a big deal, though she could still feel J’s stare lingering on her.

 

As she spoke, a realization settled in. She hadn’t actually thought about how long she and N had known each other—had it really been over a month? Maybe even two? Time had moved faster than she’d noticed. And not just with N—her whole current friend group, the one N had introduced her to, hadn’t been in her life for that long either. Yet somehow, they felt familiar now, like they had been there forever.

 

Her thoughts were cut short when J spoke again, her voice laced with suspicion. "N? In detention?" She raised an eyebrow, the doubt in her tone clear. "I don’t buy it."

 

Uzi glanced at her, feeling a small flicker of irritation. "He was late to class," she clarified. "If you don’t believe me, you can ask him yourself."

 

J went quiet for a moment, studying her with an unreadable expression. Then, tilting her head slightly, she asked, "Why do you think I don’t believe you?"

 

That threw Uzi off.

 

For just a second, she hesitated, feeling an unexpected pang of stress. J was picking apart her words, twisting them back on her, and Uzi wasn’t sure how to respond without making herself seem even more suspicious. She just said the first thing that came to mind.

 

"You just looked like you didn’t," she said with a shrug, forcing herself to stay casual.

 

For a split second, J’s expression shifted—mild confusion, maybe even a hint of offense. But then, her lips curled into a smirk, and she leaned back in her seat, laughing dryly.

 

"Yeah," J said, shaking her head slightly. "I get that a lot."

 

Just like that, the group’s conversations resumed, flowing naturally between them as if nothing had happened. Braidon and Sam went back to their easygoing chatter, Lizzy continued subtly flirting, and J and V even joined their conversation. It was effortless for them—like they had an unspoken rhythm, a familiarity that kept them all engaged.

 

Uzi, however, was once again left out. She just sat there, eating quietly, not sure if she should try to join in or if it was better to stay silent. She couldn’t tell if it was intentional or if she just didn’t fit in with them. Either way, it left her feeling awkward, like she was a background character in a scene she wasn’t really meant to be part of. And there wasn’t much she could do about it.

 

 

Uzi finally finished washing her face, patting it dry with a towel before looking up at herself in the mirror.

 

Her reflection stared back, her expression neutral, but she could still feel the lingering awkwardness from that memory, like it hadn’t fully left her yet. Shaking her head slightly, she pushed it aside. That was over. Done. No use thinking about it now.

 

Finishing up the last steps of her nightly routine, Uzi flicked off the bathroom light and stepped into the dimly lit comfort of her room. The cool air was a stark contrast to the warmth of the bathroom, making her shiver slightly as she made her way to her bed.

 

She should get some sleep—tomorrow was going to be a long day. A big day. Even if she hated to admit it, she was looking forward to going to Lizzy’s party. Maybe it was because her friends would be there. That’s what made it worth going, right? A small part of her felt an odd sense of anticipation, though she wasn’t sure if it was for the party itself or just the fact that something out of the ordinary was happening. Either way, it was enough to make her restless.

 

Sliding under the blankets, Uzi pulled them tightly around herself, cocooning in their warmth. The familiar weight of them settled over her, grounding her thoughts just enough to let exhaustion take over. As her mind drifted, her eyelids grew heavy, and within moments, she was slipping into unconsciousness, her thoughts fading into the quiet pull of sleep.

Notes:

Yuhh finally V is getting more dialogue

I love her character, she’s probably one of my favorites, but I js haven’t had much reason to include her until now

What do you think about her main friend group? If you don’t know who Sam and Braidon are, they’re like, *very* minor side characters that were mostly in the camp episode. I’m expanding on their characters a little bit, but they have enough dialogue that shows their personality and stuff, if that makes sense.

Doll is another character that’s one of my favorites, and it’s really nice that I can include her, especially considering that canonically in the show she was Lizzy’s best friend for a bit.

I loved describing Uzi’s outfit - I feel like she would dress like that. I lowkey kinda based her fit off the stuff I wear, but like not cuz I’m trying be *included* or wtv I js genuinely think her style would be similar to mine 😭 — I didn’t wanna be one of those authors who js put the characters in the same exact clothes they wear in the show cuz I’m not lazy like that. Plus I’m really big into clothes and fashion and stuff irl so it would def bother me 💔

I had to post this chapter like last minute cuz I literally have been busy asf all day. Didn’t wanna disappoint yall though 🥲

Next chapter is being coming out tomorrow!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 37: Entrant

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi sat cross-legged on her bed, eyes narrowed in concentration as she worked through a particularly frustrating level in her game. Just as she was about to make a crucial move, the sharp vibration of her phone beside her pulled her out of focus. With a sigh, she grabbed it, quickly glancing at the screen. It was a message in the group chat with her friends.



Stupid idiot robot (Thad 🤢) [4:57 PM]: R u guys all going 2 the party?? 

 

Before Uzi could even type out a response, a few messages popped up in rapid succession.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [4:57 PM]: Yeah! I’m so excited :D

 

His enthusiasm was obvious, practically radiating through the screen.

 

Rebecca 🌺 [4:58 PM]: Yuhh

 

Darrennn 𖦹ᯅ𖦹 [4:58 PM]: Same here

 

Uzi hovered her fingers over the keyboard for a second before simply typing out:

 

Uzi [4:58 PM]: yep

 

As she hit send, a thought crossed her mind—what time was the party even starting? She hadn’t paid much attention when Lizzy invited them. Figuring it was better to ask now than show up too early or too late, she quickly followed up with another message:

 

Uzi [4:59 PM] what time does it start

 

A few seconds passed before Thad responded.

 

Stupid idiot robot (Thad 🤢) [4:59 PM]: 7:30 tonight, u better be there

 

Uzi rolled her eyes, before tapping the thumbs-up emoji on his message. She then locked her phone and tossed it onto the bed beside her. She had a little over two hours until the party. Plenty of time. Still, the thought of going made her feel… weird. She had never actually been to a party like this before, now that she thought about it. That was probably why she felt so nervous…

 

Yeah. That makes sense.

 

Shaking off the thought, she turned her attention back to her game, trying to focus, though the anticipation of the night ahead lingered at the back of her mind.

 

-

 

Uzi let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding as the victory screen flashed across her game. Finally. She had been stuck on that level for what felt like forever, and it was about time she got past it. Stretching her arms above her head, she grabbed her phone from where it rested beside her and tapped the screen.

 

6:15 PM.

 

She blinked. Time had slipped away from her faster than she expected. If she wanted to make it to the party on time, she needed to start getting ready now—especially since she’d be taking the bus. The thought made her sigh. Public transportation wasn’t exactly her favorite thing in the world, but it wasn’t like she had any other way to get there.

 

Shoving her game controller aside, she swung her legs over the edge of her bed and stood up, rolling her shoulders. A small part of her still questioned whether going to this party was really worth it. But backing out now would be pointless—her friends were expecting her, and honestly, she’d rather deal with a crowded party than the boredom of staying home all night.

 

With that, she exhaled sharply and made her way toward her closet, mentally running through what she should wear. If she was going to be stuck at some over-the-top birthday party, she might as well look decent doing it.

 

Uzi sifted through her closet, eyes skimming over her options before settling on a sage green tank top. It was cropped just enough to sit comfortably above her waist, with delicate lace trim lining the edges. The back of the top had an intricate lace design that formed the shape of a bat, which added a subtle detail that she appreciated.

 

She pulled it off the hanger and grabbed a pair of dark gray cargo pants—oversized, loose-fitting, and perfect for both comfort and practicality. The deep pockets would come in handy, and the muted color balanced out the softness of her top. To finish it off, she reached for a black BB belt, the silver buckle tying the outfit together.

 

After slipping into her clothes, she hesitated by her closet for a moment before pulling out a camo-patterned zip-up hoodie. It wasn’t something she planned on wearing right away, but if it got cold later, she’d be glad to have it. She slung it over her arm before heading to her nightstand, where her jewelry box sat.

 

Flipping open the lid, Uzi quickly found what she was looking for—simple silver stud earrings and her usual collection of rings. The cool metal felt familiar against her fingers as she slid the rings into place, each one comfortably settled in its usual spot.

 

With her outfit now complete, she stepped over to the full-length mirror hanging on her door, taking in her reflection. Her gaze flickered down to her feet. What shoes should she wear? The black boots she usually wore would work just fine, probably. No need to overthink it.

 

She smirked slightly at her own reflection before doing a quick spin, admiring how everything came together. Not bad. She could care less what anyone else thought - she was content with what she was wearing.

 

But she still had some time to kill. With a small sigh, Uzi made her way back to her bed, grabbing her controller again. One more round of her game wouldn’t hurt before she had to leave.

 

-

 

Uzi sighed, adjusting the strap of her black handbag as the bus came to a halt. The dim interior lights flickered slightly as she glanced down at her phone, the screen glowing back at her with the time: 7:46 PM.

 

Great. She was late.

 

She hadn’t meant to be—she just lost track of time while playing her game, and now she was paying for it. As if on cue, her phone buzzed in her hand. Uzi rolled her eyes, already knowing who it was before she even looked.

 

Sure enough, it was Thad. His message was straightforward:

 

Stupid idiot robot (Thad 🤢) [7:46 PM]: Yo wru??

 

Uzi exhaled sharply through her nose, thumbs flying over her keyboard as she typed out a quick response.

 

Uzi: here

 

She barely hit send before stuffing her phone back into her bag and pushing herself up from her seat. The bus doors hissed open, and as she stepped down onto the pavement, a rush of cold air hit her immediately. She shivered, feeling the bite of the night air against her arms as the bus rumbled away.

 

Without thinking twice, she reached down, untying the camo hoodie from around her waist before slipping it on. It wasn’t much, but it helped.

 

The house wasn’t far—just a short walk down the street. As she started forward, the rhythmic steps of her boots against the pavement was the only sound accompanying her. The streetlights cast a dim glow, stretching her shadow out long in front of her.

 

She felt a pit forming in her stomach as her anticipation built. She was almost there - but she was having her doubts. Maybe she could just turn back, go home, and pretend she was sick or something.

 

She shook off the thought, picking up her pace. It wasn’t like she could turn back now - the bus was gone.

 

As Uzi walked, the unease settled deeper in her chest. Each step closer to the house made her more restless, though she couldn’t quite figure out why. It wasn’t like this was a big deal—just a party, nothing more. She had been to gatherings before, and she had no real reason to feel so worked up about this one.

 

Taking a deep breath, she tried to shake off the nerves.

 

Up ahead, the house finally came into view, standing tall against the backdrop of the dusky sky. The sun had nearly disappeared below the horizon, leaving streaks of deep blue and orange fading into darkness. Uzi glanced at her phone out of habit, flicking back to her messages. It was the same one Thad had sent earlier—the one confirming the time and place.

 

She stuffed her phone into her pocket and kept walking.

 

The closer she got, the more the scene unfolded before her. The low, steady pulse of music thrummed in the distance, growing louder with every step. Bright, colorful lights flashed intermittently through the closed blinds, casting fragmented hues onto the front porch. Even from outside, the energy of the party was palpable—laughter, muffled voices, the occasional shout over the music.

 

Uzi slowed for just a second, looking up at the house, taking it all in. A party like this should be fun, right? Her friends would be there. It wasn’t like she was walking into a room full of strangers. So why did she still feel like an outsider?

 

Brushing the thought aside, she took the last few steps toward the door. Whatever this night had in store for her, she was about to find out.

 

Uzi stood at the front door, hesitating for a moment before pressing the doorbell. She waited, shifting her weight slightly, listening for any movement inside. Nothing.

 

Frowning, she raised a fist and knocked firmly against the door. Still nothing.

 

A quiet groan of frustration left her lips. Was this a sign that she should just leave? She wanted to take it as one. But she knew she couldn’t—not when she had already come all this way. Sighing, she pulled out her phone, ready to message Thad and tell him to open the door.

 

Before she could even type a word, the door swung open.

 

A wave of noise crashed over her immediately—music blasting from inside, muffled voices overlapping, and the occasional sound of laughter and shouting. The flashing lights from inside cast shifting shadows over the doorway. Standing there, drink in hand, was Braidon.

 

He squinted at her, eyes scanning her from head to toe, before tilting his head slightly in confusion. “Uh… who are you?”

 

Uzi stared at him flatly, unimpressed. “Uzi.”

 

For a moment, Braidon just looked at her, brows furrowed, before realization finally dawned on his face. His expression shifted, and he let out a short, amused laugh. “Ohhh. The emo girl.” He grinned. “That’s what Lizzy calls you, at least.”

 

Uzi let out a dry, unamused chuckle. Of course Lizzy called her that. It wasn’t exactly an insult, but it was seemed like something she’d say.

 

Braidon didn’t seem to pick up on her lack of amusement. Instead, he pushed the door open wider, stepping aside. “Well, come on in.”

 

His posture was relaxed, casual, as if he had already settled well into the party’s atmosphere. His expression, while friendly enough, held that same clueless air that made Uzi wonder just how much he had been drinking already.

 

Shaking off the brief irritation, she took a breath and stepped inside.

 

The moment Uzi stepped inside, she was met with a chaotic blur of flashing lights, moving figures, and a pulsing bass that reverberated through the floors. The only proper lighting came from the hallway leading further into the house, casting a dim glow against the walls. The rest of the space was swallowed in darkness, illuminated only by the shifting neon colors of glow sticks clutched in every other drone’s hand.

 

The living room, now transformed into the heart of the party, was packed with drones. Some swayed and bobbed to the beat of the music, dancing with exaggerated movements under the flickering LED strips that had been haphazardly strung across the ceiling. Most, however, stood in small clusters, deep in conversation, their voices barely audible over the pounding music. The furniture had been pushed against the walls, clearing space for the impromptu dance floor, though a few drones had claimed the couches, their glow sticks resting lazily against their laps.

 

Uzi hovered in the doorway, her gaze scanning the crowd. A flicker of familiarity caught her attention—Darren, standing near the edge of the room, his usual laid-back posture unchanged despite the party atmosphere. Beside him was Rebecca, who looked engaged in whatever conversation they were having. Relief settled in Uzi’s chest.

 

Without hesitation, she pushed her way through the crowd, weaving between drones swaying to the music and stepping over the occasional discarded glow stick. The overwhelming energy of the room made her uneasy, but she ignored the feeling. At least now, she had a destination.

 

As Uzi finally broke through the sea of drones, Darren was the first to spot her. His expression brightened, and he raised a hand in greeting.

 

“Hey, you made it,” he called over the music, his tone genuinely pleased.

 

Rebecca turned at his words, her face lighting up with recognition. She gave a small wave as well. Uzi returned the gesture, stepping up to them.

 

“Glad you could come,” Darren continued.

 

Rebecca nodded in agreement. “Yeah, I didn’t think you’d actually show.”

 

Uzi let out a dry chuckle, crossing her arms. “Yeah, well, I guess I’m glad I did… maybe.” She glanced around the room, before shaking her head. “I can’t believe I let Thad talk me into this.”

 

As she spoke, something clicked in her mind—Thad wasn’t here. She furrowed her brow slightly and turned back to Darren.

 

“Where even is he, anyway?” she asked.

 

As if summoned by the mere mention of his name, a voice piped up from behind her.

 

“Yes?”

 

Uzi turned, already rolling her eyes as she came face-to-face with Thad, who was grinning like he had been expecting her reaction.

 

“Hey,” she greeted flatly.

 

Thad laughed, crossing his arms. “I was starting to think you weren’t gonna show.”

 

Uzi shrugged nonchalantly. “Got sidetracked with more important things.”

 

Thad raised a skeptical brow, smirking. “Oh yeah? What could possibly be more important? Lemme guess—you were playing video games.” His voice dripped with teasing sarcasm.

 

Uzi wasn’t about to give him the satisfaction of knowing he was right. Keeping her expression deadpan, she looked him straight in the eyes and lied.

 

“Homework.”

 

Thad immediately scoffed, clearly unconvinced, but before he could call her out, Uzi added, “Idiot.”

 

Her words made Darren chuckle, and Rebecca smirked, while Thad just shook his head with a knowing grin.

 

Thad held up the drinks he had brought, his grin widening as he turned toward Darren and Rebecca.

 

“Brought you guys something,” he said, handing each of them a colorful party cup.

 

Darren accepted his with a nod of appreciation, while Rebecca took hers with a smirk. “Nice. Thanks, Thad.”

 

Thad merely shrugged, clearly pleased with himself, before shifting his attention to Uzi. “Don’t think I forgot about you,” he said, holding out a neon orange cup.

 

Uzi eyed it warily, not making a move to take it. “Yeah, no way I’m accepting some mystery drink from you.”

 

Thad scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Relax. It’s just punch.”

 

Uzi sighed, still skeptical, but reached for the cup anyway. “Fine.”

 

Bringing the drink to her lips, she took a sip. The taste of artificial fruit punch hit her tongue immediately—but beneath the sugary sweetness, there was something else. A distinct, bitter undertone that she recognized instantly.

 

Her eyes widened slightly, her grip on the cup tightening as irritation flared up inside her. She swallowed the sip and barely resisted the urge to throw the entire drink in Thad’s face. Instead, she shot him an incredulous glare.

 

“What the hell, Thad?” she snapped. “You didn’t think to mention that this was spiked?”

 

Thad just chuckled, completely unbothered. “What’s the big deal? You can barely even taste it.”

 

Uzi exhaled sharply through her nose, her patience running dangerously thin. Without a word, she set the cup down on the nearest table and fixed Thad with a glare sharp enough to cut through steel.

 

“I’m not trying to get drunk, and I’m definitely not into the whole ‘underage drinking’ thing,” she said, her voice flat but laced with annoyance. “And you should consider yourself lucky there’s a table here—because otherwise, that would’ve been in your face.”

 

Thad merely laughed, unfazed, and to Uzi’s further annoyance, Darren and Rebecca chuckled along with him. She rolled her eyes, crossing her arms. If this was what the night was going to be like, she was going to need a lot more patience.

 

Rebecca shifted her weight slightly, glancing around before turning her attention to Thad. “So, when’s N gonna come over here?” she asked casually, taking a sip from her drink.

 

Uzi blinked, momentarily thrown off. She hadn’t even thought about N. Now that Rebecca mentioned him, she realized she had no idea where he was.

 

Thad gave a lazy shrug. “Last I saw, he was talking to V or something.”

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed slightly. V? She hadn’t expected that. Not that it was weird—N and V were friends, after all—but still, it caught her off guard. She pushed the thought aside. Why did it even matter? It wasn’t like N had to stick by her side the entire night.

 

Before she could dwell on it any longer, another thought struck her. There was someone missing. Someone who should’ve been here.

 

“Wait,” Uzi spoke up, glancing between them. “Where’s Emily?”

 

Rebecca gave a small shrug. “She wasn’t allowed to come.”

 

Uzi frowned slightly. “Why?”

 

Rebecca sighed, tilting her cup in her hand absentmindedly. “Something about her parents being religious. She is too, honestly. And even if they did let her, she probably wouldn’t have come anyway—she’s not really into... well, this crowd.”

 

Uzi processed that for a moment before nodding. “Yeah, that makes sense.”

 

She couldn’t say she was too surprised. Emily wasn’t exactly the party type, and with her strict parents, it checked out that she wouldn’t be here. Still, it felt a little odd not having her around. But at the end of the day, it wasn’t really her business.

 

Uzi broke the brief silence with a shrug. “So... what now?”

 

Thad, ever the laid-back one, smirked. “I dunno, we could go find N, talk to some more drones, just do whatever.” He waved a hand vaguely, as if the possibilities were endless.

 

Rebecca and Darren exchanged glances, both giving indifferent shrugs. They didn’t seem to have any strong opinions either way.

 

Uzi sighed, stuffing her hands into her pockets. “Sure, whatever.”

 

With that, Thad took the lead, guiding them further into the packed living room. Uzi followed closely, doing her best to weave through the dense crowd without bumping into anyone. The air was thick with the artificial scent of overly sweet drinks and cheap perfume, and the bass of the music pulsed through the walls, vibrating in her chest.

 

Glow sticks in every neon color imaginable flashed in drones’ hands, casting shifting hues of green, blue, and purple across their metal frames. Some danced—though ‘danced’ might’ve been a generous term for the chaotic, jerky movements a few of them were making—while others were still locked in conversation, huddled in their own groups. The air buzzed with a mix of laughter, shouted conversations barely audible over the music, and the occasional clatter of a cup being knocked over.

 

Eventually, Thad slowed as they approached another group. Uzi immediately recognized most of them.

 

There was N, standing next to V, who was smirking at something he had just said. Lizzy was there too, looking every bit the host, drink in hand as she chatted with Sam and Braidon. And then there was Doll, standing slightly apart from the group, her expression unreadable as always.

 

Uzi’s gaze lingered on N for a second longer than she meant to. She hadn’t even realized she’d been wondering where he was until she saw him. Something about seeing him with V, though—it made her stomach twist in a way she didn’t entirely understand. But she shook it off. It wasn’t like it mattered.

 

Pushing the thought aside, she refocused. Whether she liked it or not, this was her night now.

 

As they reached the group, conversations momentarily quieted as heads turned toward the newcomers. A chorus of greetings filled the air, casual waves and nods exchanged between drones. Uzi glanced around, offering a small, polite wave in return—until her gaze landed on N.

 

The moment their eyes met, his entire expression brightened, as if her presence alone had made his night infinitely better. “Uzi!” he beamed, his hands twitching slightly at his sides as if resisting the urge to wave more excitedly. “I’m so glad you made it!”

 

His enthusiasm was almost overwhelming, and Uzi wasn’t entirely sure how to respond. She wasn’t not glad to see him, but she could never quite match his energy—not that she ever tried. So, instead, she settled for a simple, “Yeah, good to see you too. Glad to be here.” Her tone was even, not disinterested, but definitely lacking his excitement. It wasn’t intentional; she just wasn’t like that.

 

Still, something about the way his expression lit up made something weird twist in her chest. She quickly shoved the feeling aside, barely acknowledging it before Lizzy’s voice cut in.

 

“Wow, Uzi, hi!” Lizzy grinned, tilting her head. “I thought you totally flaked.”

 

Uzi shrugged, offering the simplest explanation. “Lost track of time.”

 

Lizzy giggled, seeming unbothered, before shifting her attention back to a conversation with N, V, Darren, Rebecca, and Thad. The group naturally fell into chatter, discussing something Uzi wasn’t particularly interested in—until a movement caught her eye.

 

Someone was waving at her from the side. She turned her head to see Sam, his usual lazy smirk plastered across his face. “Hey,” he greeted, his voice slow and drawn out. “How you doin’?”

 

Uzi immediately took note of his way too laid-back demeanor. His words slurred slightly, though he wasn’t stumbling or anything—just moving with an odd sluggishness. Then there were his eyes—noticeably hazy, with a strong pink tinge to them. And just like that, everything clicked.

 

This guy was high.

 

Uzi barely resisted the urge to roll her eyes. She really didn’t care enough to entertain whatever conversation he was trying to start. Instead, she kept it brief. “Hey. I’m fine.”

 

Sam just grinned, clearly vibing in his own world, while Uzi turned her attention elsewhere. She wasn’t about to waste her time on whatever this was.

 

Uzi’s eyes drifted to Braidon, standing next to Sam. The moment their gazes met, a flicker of confusion passed across his face before he turned away, as if dismissing her presence entirely. She didn’t need to guess. Braidon had clearly forgotten who she was, again. And to be honest, Uzi didn’t particularly care for him, or to even waste her thoughts on this.

 

Shaking off the unpleasant feeling, Uzi turned her attention back to the group. With a deep breath, she stepped closer, preparing to join in, but instead found herself listening more than speaking. The conversation wasn’t exactly riveting, but she didn’t mind just observing for the moment.

 

Thad was talking about some ridiculous prank idea he had seen online, his voice growing more animated by the second. “Seriously, you guys, imagine it: we fill someone’s locker with confetti—like, tons of it—so when they open it, they’re buried alive in it. It’d be hilarious.”

 

Rebecca snorted, clearly entertained by the thought. “Yeah, and definitely not a complete waste of time. Sounds like a great idea, Thad.”

 

Darren leaned in with a teasing grin. “What, you too scared to do it?”

 

Thad feigned offense, clutching his chest. “Scared? Me? Please. I just think we should go bigger. Like, a whole room filled with balloons instead of confetti. We’d need a serious plan for that one.”

 

V, who had been mostly quiet and just observing until then, raised an eyebrow. “You’re not actually planning on doing this, are you? Sounds like a nightmare.”

 

Thad waved him off, not the least bit discouraged. “Don’t worry, it’ll be legendary. Just wait until we actually pull it off.”

 

Uzi let their chatter wash over her, tuning in and out of their words. It was the usual banter, nothing too out of the ordinary.

 

Uzi’s mind drifted in and out of focus as the conversation swirled around her. This party was so much like she expected, yet so different at the same time.

 

There was an odd sense of detachment as she observed everything around her.

 

Nothing catastrophic had happened, and everyone seemed to be having a good time—if you could ignore the underaged drinking happening right under everyone’s noses. Honestly, though, she didn’t care much about that. Teenagers were going to do what they were going to do.

 

For a brief moment, the idea of letting go, of just being at a party like this, slipped into her thoughts. No parents around, no rules to follow. The concept of losing herself in the chaos, of being swept away by the freedom, was almost tempting. But then the reality hit her. What would happen if she got drunk? What if, when she got home, her dad saw her—would he even notice? Not that they talked all that often, but coming home smelling of alcohol would definitely get his attention.

 

Uzi cringed at the idea of a forced “talk” with him. The thought alone made her skin crawl. He’d probably bring up her mother.

 

She quickly pushed the uncomfortable thought aside, focusing on the present again, but the unease lingered, a quiet knot in her chest. The buzz of music and chatter continued around her, but in that moment, she felt worlds apart from it all.

 

Uzi snapped out of her thoughts when she noticed the group moving away. Thad had just passed her, but instead of continuing on, he turned back with an expectant look.

 

"You coming?" he asked, tilting his head.

Notes:

Yurrr finally we’re at the party

This arc overall has been my favorite to write. You’ll see why soon 🤭

Plus I js generally love the concept of like, a high school party being incorporated into a story like this. There’s so many different things you can make happen, good or bad, and it’s like the opportunities are literally endless

I feel like Uzi would have pretty solid self control when being in a place like this. Like she’s not gonna drink js cuz everyone else is, or she thinks it’ll make her look ‘cool’. She literally doesn’t gaf what anyone thinks, and I love that for her 😭

Even if she is deeply self conscious in different ways, she’s not when it comes to ‘impressing her peers’ cuz like, she js doesn’t care since she’s used to not being the center of attention, yk?

Another thing - obviously the drones aren’t human, so it’s like, how can they get drunk or high? Well, in this AU, they consume food and stuff (in the show they don’t) so like it would only make sense that they have alcohol. And canonically, Sam is depicted as like, a stoner, cuz he’s always high on ‘magnets’ (he mentions that in the camp episode.) But like in this AU I’m gonna assume they have drugs and stuff, right? Maybe it works a little differently, but like internally for them it’s gonna mess with their cpu or wtv idfk 😭 Maybe it’s kinda like, a temporary virus, or it js clouds it and makes them act in ‘strange’/see strange things, or forget memories (like drugs irl obvi) so yeah idk.

Who really gives a fuck abt logic and realism in this context though, it’s a fictional story so I’m gonna do wtv I want 😭🤚

**OH ALSO SUPER SUPER IMPORTANT**
I’m gonna take a break for a day. I seriously need to catch up on future chapters so there’s no long hold up in the story. I’ve been so busy the past few days that I’ve only been able to focus on editing and posting, which I do in the little amount of free time I have 😭 so like, I’ve only gotten literally 2 or 3 chapters done the past week. If I take a break though from posting I could probably get like, 3 done in just one day, if I only focus on that. SO YEAH, THIS IS ONLY FOR 1 DAY!!! DONT WORRY, THE POSTING SCHEDULE WILL RESUME AS NORMAL AFTER THAT.

I think that’s everything I have to say. Byeee

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 38: Oops

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi blinked in confusion, glancing around before meeting his gaze. "Where exactly are we going?" she asked, her tone skeptical.

 

Thad chuckled, as if the answer was obvious. "We’re gonna play some games. Everyone’s heading to the couch." He gestured toward the center of the living room, where the group was already gathering.

 

Before Uzi could respond, a flicker of movement caught her eye. She turned her head just in time to see Lizzy approaching, a board game tucked under one arm. Walking beside her was J, her usual detached expression in place. Uzi was momentarily surprised—she hadn't even realized J was here. Then again, with how chaotic everything had been, it wasn’t too shocking that she’d overlooked her.

 

Shrugging, Uzi decided there was nothing better to do. Without much thought, she stepped forward, following the group toward the couch, though part of her still wasn’t sure if she was actually looking forward to whatever this game was going to be.

 

By the time Uzi made it over, she quickly realized the couch was already packed. Darren and Rebecca were comfortably nestled together, Darren’s arm lazily draped around Rebecca’s shoulders. Nearby, Braidon was chatting animatedly with another drone Uzi didn’t recognize, but judging by their easy conversation and shared laughter, she figured they were friends. With no available space left on the couch, she opted for the floor, settling in front of it with a sigh.

 

Just as she sat down, Thad dropped himself beside her—way too close for comfort. Uzi immediately shoved him, forcing some distance between them.

 

“Move over,” she said flatly, not in the mood to deal with his antics.

 

Thad wobbled slightly from the push, nearly spilling the drink in his hand. “Hey, careful!” he exclaimed before breaking into a laugh. “Alright, my bad.” He scooted an inch away—not much, but enough that Uzi decided to let it slide.

 

As he took a sip from his drink, Uzi’s attention drifted forward, drawn by movement near the couch. Lizzy had crouched down and was spreading out a large plastic tarp onto the floor. It didn’t take long for Uzi to realize what it was—Twister.

 

She let out an exasperated sigh, already deciding she wanted no part in this. The thought of tangling herself up with a bunch of uncoordinated, possibly tipsy drones sounded like a disaster waiting to happen. Instead, she leaned back slightly, watching with mild disinterest as Lizzy finished setting up. This was bound to be entertaining, at least—so long as she wasn’t the one playing.

 

Uzi’s gaze wandered across the room, taking in the various drones scattered around. To her far right, V lounged against the arm of the couch, legs stretched out and drink in hand, sipping absentmindedly as if she had all the time in the world. Beside her, J sat with a relaxed yet composed demeanor, amusement flickering in her expression, though she still carried that calculated sharpness she always did. A couple of drones Uzi didn’t recognize sat alongside them, engaged in quiet conversation.

 

Above them, perched on the actual armrest of the couch, was N. He swung his legs idly, watching the scene with his usual bright-eyed enthusiasm, looking content just to be there. Behind the couch, Doll stood with her arms crossed, her sharp gaze scanning the room like she was taking mental notes on everything happening. A few other drones Uzi didn’t recognize stood near her, leaning lazily against the back of the couch.

 

Before Uzi could take in anything else, Lizzy’s voice cut through the low murmur of conversation. “Alright! Who’s up first?” she called, a playful lilt to her tone as she looked around expectantly.

 

A few drones Uzi didn’t know stepped forward, moving toward the plastic mat Lizzy had set up. Just as she was thinking about how she wanted no part in this, Thad nudged her with his elbow.

 

“You should totally play,” he teased, grinning at her.

 

Uzi didn’t even hesitate. With a roll of her eyes, she reached up and knocked the brim of his backwards cap, shoving it down over his face. “Shut up,” she muttered, watching in satisfaction as he fumbled to fix it.

 

Thad just laughed, pushing his cap back into place. “Alright, alright, geez,” he said, still grinning. Uzi shook her head, smirking slightly despite herself. There was no way she was playing, but at least she could sit back and enjoy watching the chaos unfold.

 

As the game kicked off, Lizzy made her way over to the couch, positioning herself behind N but beside Doll. She stood with her arms crossed, watching as the first player spun the wheel. A mischievous glint sparkled in her eyes as she glanced at Doll.

 

“You should totally play the next round,” Lizzy suggested, her tone playful, as if daring Doll to say yes.

 

Doll, however, looked thoroughly unamused. Without missing a beat, shot back,”Ад Нет.” she muttered, her voice flat and unenthusiastic.

 

Lizzy smirked but wasn’t ready to give up just yet. “Come on, it’ll be fun,” she urged, leaning slightly closer.

 

Doll merely rolled her eye, the gesture making it clear she had no intention of entertaining the idea.

 

Realizing she wasn’t getting anywhere, Lizzy shifted her attention to N instead. “So, are you enjoying my party so far?” she asked, raising an eyebrow expectantly.

 

N, sitting comfortably on the armrest, perked up at being addressed. “Yeah! I’m having fun,” he replied with his usual enthusiasm.

 

Lizzy blinked, as if his simple response had somehow personally offended her. “That’s it?” she teased, feigning disbelief.

 

N tilted his head slightly, thinking for a moment before adding, “Well… the punch tastes kinda weird. But other than that, it’s been great! I’m really glad I came.” He flashed a bright smile, his sincerity evident.

 

Uzi, who had been casually eavesdropping, couldn’t help but smirk slightly herself. Watching the way Lizzy interacted with everyone was entertaining in its own way.

 

Uzi exhaled a quiet chuckle, shaking her head slightly. Of course N didn’t realize the punch was spiked. It shouldn’t have surprised her—he didn’t seem like the type to drink. Still, the fact that he seemed so genuinely oblivious to it was almost amusing.

 

She found herself wondering if he had truly never tried alcohol before. Most drones had at least some experience with it, even if just out of curiosity. But N? He acted like he hadn’t even considered the possibility. The thought was oddly endearing.

 

She stifled another laugh, a smirk tugging at the corners of her mouth. For someone who was always so eager to be included, he really was completely out of his depth in certain situations. It was almost… innocent. Uzi wasn’t sure why that stood out to her so much, but it did. Shrugging off the thought, she returned her focus to the game.

 

Uzi barely had time to process her amusement over N’s obliviousness before Lizzy’s giggling cut through her thoughts. She glanced over again just in time to see Lizzy playfully shove N’s shoulder, her usual smug grin on full display.

 

“You’re cute,” Lizzy teased, her tone light and almost sing-song.

 

N, to absolutely no one’s surprise, didn’t react in any way Lizzy was probably hoping for. He just blinked and smiled, offering a casual, “Thanks, I guess,” as if she had just complimented his shoes instead of his appearance.

 

Lizzy didn’t seem deterred. Instead, she leaned in slightly, still smirking. “How long are you staying at the party?” she asked, her voice carrying a faux innocence.

 

N paused, looking up in thought before responding. “I dunno, probably until my friends leave.”

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes. She wasn’t sure where Lizzy was going with this, but something about the way she was talking made her uneasy.

 

Lizzy’s smile widened just slightly. “You should stay after,” she suggested, her tone laced with something Uzi couldn’t quite place—but she didn’t like it.

 

N, being N, completely missed whatever very obvious  implication Lizzy was trying to make. He simply shrugged. “It really just depends on how late my friends stay,” he said with a simple shrug, sounding genuinely thoughtful.

 

Lizzy giggled again, her gaze lingering on him. “We’ll see,” she hummed.

 

Uzi felt a weird, prickling sensation crawl up her spine. Was Lizzy flirting with him?

 

Horror settled into her circuits. She totally was. And worse—N wasn’t even picking up on it.

 

Uzi’s hands clenched slightly where they rested on her lap. She wasn’t sure why she was suddenly so irritated, but the feeling gnawed at her. Lizzy was obviously up to something. She didn’t want to let this slide -  N was her friend, and Lizzy wasn’t exactly known for her good intentions. That’s why this was bothering her.

 

…Right?

 

Uzi inhaled sharply and forced herself to look away, trying to shake the weird tension in her chest. It wasn’t her business. It wasn’t her problem. And yet, she couldn’t seem to ignore it.

 

 

Uzi shifted her gaze back toward the center of the room, willing herself to ignore the lingering irritation clawing at her. The game had progressed far more than she’d realized, and now the drones playing were so tangled together they looked like a mess of limbs and metal. It was a wonder anyone was still holding themselves up.

 

Then, with a loud thud, one of them lost their balance, collapsing onto the mat. The fall set off a chain reaction, sending the rest of them toppling over in a chaotic heap. Laughter erupted from the group, the sound filling the room. Even Uzi had to repress a chuckle, shaking her head at the ridiculous scene.

 

Lizzy, looking thoroughly entertained, strolled back to the front of the room and smoothed out the mat, straightening any wrinkles from the pileup. “Alright, who’s up next?” she called out, scanning the room with a grin.

 

Uzi glanced to her side, her smirk sharpening as she eyed Thad. “You should go now, while you have the chance,” she said, her tone almost teasing.

 

To her surprise, he didn’t even argue. “Sure,” he said with a lopsided grin, chuckling as he pushed himself up.

 

Uzi immediately took note of how unsteady he was. Yeah, he was definitely tipsy. Of course he was.

 

As he straightened, he turned back to her, holding out his drink. “Hold this for me?” he asked.

 

Uzi shrugged, taking the cup from him. “Yeah, sure.”

 

As soon as his back was turned, she quickly shoved the cup under the couch, making sure it was far enough out of sight that he wouldn’t immediately find it. Hopefully, this would keep him from drinking more—at least for a little while.

 

She settled back, watching him approach the mat, and exhaled. She didn’t know why she cared enough to do that, but whatever. It wasn’t like she wanted to deal with him getting even more drunk—who knows how he’d even act fully drunk. She didn’t want to find out.

 

The game had begun, the first drone spinning the wheel as the others waited for their turn. Uzi watched with mild interest, her attention locked onto the unfolding match—until she felt a sudden tap on her shoulder.

 

She scowled instantly, her amusement cut short, and turned to see who had dared to interrupt her. It was Sam.

 

He was standing beside her, bending slightly to meet her eye level, a lazy grin plastered across his face. In his hands was a plate of brownies—thick, rich, and clearly  homemade, not the dry, crumbly kind from a store-bought mix. They had that perfectly fudgy texture, dense and dark, and the warm scent of chocolate was enough to make her stomach tighten in hunger.

 

“Want one?” Sam asked, his voice slow and relaxed, like he had all the time in the world.

 

Uzi was about to say yes immediately. She was a little hungry, and they looked ridiculously good. But just as she was about to reach out, something clicked in her head.

 

Wait.

 

Brownies. At a house party.

 

Her curious expression dropped into a deadpan stare. She didn’t even hesitate before asking bluntly, “Are they normal brownies?”

 

Sam just shrugged, clearly unfazed. “Dunno,” he said, dragging out the syllables in a way that made it obvious he definitely knew. His condescending tone only confirmed her suspicions.

 

Uzi withdrew her hand, unimpressed. Sam, seeing her lack of interest, just chuckled to himself. “More for me, then,” he mused, plucking one off the plate and taking a bite as he wandered off, looking entirely too pleased with himself.

 

Uzi exhaled through her nose, shaking her head. Seriously? Not only was there alcohol, but of course there were weed brownies too. She wasn’t even surprised at this point. It was a high school party—this was practically inevitable.

 

Still, she couldn’t help but feel mildly exasperated. Drones really couldn’t just have a normal party, could they?

 

Uzi turned her attention back to the game, relieved that she could finally watch without being interrupted. It was entertaining enough—drones awkwardly maneuvering around each other, contorting into increasingly ridiculous positions—but after a while, the repetition started to dull her interest. Spin, move a hand or foot, struggle to stay balanced, repeat.

 

Her mind started to wander, and out of instinct, she let her gaze drift around the room. Most of the drones were still engaged in their own conversations, sipping on their drinks or absentmindedly watching the game. A few were snacking on brownies—those brownies, the ones Sam had just offered her. Uzi wasn’t surprised that some of them had taken the bait. What did catch her completely off guard, though, was when her eyes landed on one particular drone.

 

N.

 

He was sitting there, looking as carefree as ever, casually eating a brownie.

 

Uzi felt her mind short-circuit for a moment, her thoughts screeching to a halt.

 

What the hell is he doing?!

 

Her first instinct was to assume he knew exactly what he was eating, but then reality hit her like a freight train. No. Of course he doesn’t know.

 

Just like with the punch, N had no clue what he was actually consuming. He’d already admitted the drink tasted weird, and now he was just munching away on that brownie, completely oblivious to the fact that he was ingesting an edible.

 

A cold sense of dread settled into Uzi’s system, her oil running cold as she processed what this meant.

 

Oh, this is bad.

 

If she called him out on it now, she’d cause a whole scene, and considering how quiet the room was while everyone focused on the game, that was the last thing she wanted. But if she did nothing… who knew how this was going to affect him?

 

Uzi clenched her jaw, forcing herself to stay calm, but internally, she was panicking. How the hell do I fix this without making things worse? 

 

Uzi forced herself to push aside her internal crisis about N as best as she could, focusing back on the game just in time for the round to finally end. As the last of the drones in the center untangled themselves from the heap they’d collapsed into, Thad trudged back over to his spot beside her and flopped down with a sigh.

 

"Man, I was so close," he complained, running a hand through his messy cap-covered head. "If I hadn’t fallen at the last second, I totally would’ve won."

 

Uzi gave him a flat look, arms crossed. “Maybe next time you’ll actually be sober and stand a chance.”

 

Thad scoffed, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth like he was about to throw back some witty remark—but before he could, Lizzy’s voice rang out again from the front of the room.

 

"Alright, everyone!" she called out, her ever-present grin widening. “We’re switching things up!”

 

Uzi immediately felt a prickle of unease at the excitement in her tone. Lizzy was holding something in her hands—a bottle.

 

Oh no.

 

Lizzy dramatically held it up for everyone to see. "We’re playing Seven Minutes in Heaven !"

 

Uzi stiffened, every part of her rejecting those words on instinct. Oh, hell no.

 

Her immediate thought was to get up and walk away before she could get dragged into this mess, but before she even had the chance, the entire room shifted. Everyone—everyone—was already moving, settling down in a circle on the floor.

 

Uzi sat frozen, her horror settling in fully.

 

She was trapped.

 

Before Uzi could even process an escape plan, Lizzy was already setting the game in motion. She placed the bottle in the center of the circle and gave it a swift spin, the room going quiet with anticipation.

 

Uzi tensed, watching it twirl, dreading the possibility of it pointing at her.

 

The bottle finally slowed, wobbling slightly before stopping on some drone she didn’t even recognize. Immediately, the room erupted with exaggerated oooohs, a few of the guy’s friends laughing and nudging him teasingly. The drone himself looked flustered but didn’t protest.

 

Uzi exhaled, relieved—at least for a moment. But then Lizzy, grinning like she was having the time of her life, spun the bottle again.

 

Uzi’s breath hitched as she followed its movement, her nerves spiking when it started to slow. It crept dangerously close to her, the narrow end almost settling in her direction—

 

But then, at the last second, it passed her entirely, stopping on another drone. A girl.

 

Uzi barely had time to feel relieved before she noticed the girl’s expression. She was petrified. Eyes wide, body stiff as if she were silently pleading for a way out. But before she could even think to protest, her so-called friends were already pushing her towards the hallway, practically forcing her into the game.

 

Uzi let out a slow breath. That was way too close for comfort. But at least she was safe… for now.

 

As the room shifted with movement, drones either trailed after the pair heading toward the closet or lingered behind, chatting amongst themselves. Uzi, wanting no part in the spectacle, stood up and made her way to the now-vacant couch. She sank into the cushions with a quiet sigh, her disinterest in the game solidified.

 

This whole thing felt stupid. It wasn’t even just the concept—it was the way everyone got so into it, as if it were some huge, exciting event. She just didn’t see the appeal.

 

Thad, who had been getting up himself, turned back to look at her. "You coming?" he asked, his tone casual, but his stance just slightly unsteady.

 

Uzi shook her head. “Yeah, no. I think I’ll pass,” she replied flatly.

 

Thad just shrugged, unbothered. “Suit yourself.” Then, without another word, he turned and wandered off, his steps slightly wobbly as he made his way toward the growing crowd.

 

Left in relative quiet, Uzi took in her surroundings. A small group of drones she didn’t know had gathered in the middle of the room, joking and laughing amongst themselves. They seemed absorbed in their own world, their conversation lively but not obnoxious. By the doorway leading to the hallway, Doll leaned against the wall, arms crossed, expression blank—clearly not entertained by the situation either. A few others stood nearby, looking just as disinterested, likely just waiting for things to resume.

 

For the first time all night, Uzi felt like she had some space. She exhaled, allowing herself to relax, even if only a little.

 

But just as she settled into that brief moment of peace, she noticed movement in her periphery—someone approaching her.

 

Her gaze flicked up, and a sinking feeling settled in her chest.

 

It was N.

 

Oh no…

Notes:

I’m backkkk

I got like 2 chapters done yesterday so that’s great

Anyways LMAOOOO poor N 😭💔

I feel like he’d be someone who’s *completely* oblivious abt things like drugs or wtv cuz he doesn’t or has never hung around people like that, and also isn’t remotely interested in it either. He’s so innocent and sweet I love him 😭

Uzi doesn’t hang around people like that either cuz she doesn’t really care for it, but like I feel like she’d understand more abt it yk? Like maybe at one point she had a friend into that stuff who would talk abt it, cuz it’s not that hard to come across people like that tbh— that’s kinda sad now that I think abt it. But regardless, basically Uzi js knows abt shit ig, one way or another

At first, when I was writing this chapter, it was js intended to be filler and stuff as well as pacing, but then I had that idea that N would accidentally eat a fucking weed brownie, and I thought it was hilarious

It kinda reminds me of perks of being a wallflower, if you’ve seen that, when Charlie accidentally eats a weed brownie at a house party 💀 that wasn’t my inspiration or anything, I literally js now rememberd that 💔

Oh yeah and btw u can promise u that N isn’t crossed 😭🤚 (if you don’t know what that means, it means being drunk and high at the same time.)

No way was I gonna do that to him— he probably js took a sip of the punch and thought it was nasty so he didn’t keep drinking it, and obvi one sip of that stuff isn’t enough to make u drunk 💀

I can’t wait to post the next chapters omg so much shit is gonna happen 😖

Next chapter is coming out tomorrow, the posting schedule will resume as normal. Idk if anyone is even reading this anymore, or like has stuck with it this long, cuz there’s so many chapters, but idrc cuz like im js kinda posting this for me since I’ve been writing it and might as well, yk? 💔 For anyone who is though, I hope you’re enjoying my silly story 😭

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 39: 7 Minutes (in hell)

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

N approached with his usual friendly energy, waving casually as he greeted her. "Hey," he said before settling onto the couch beside her.

 

Uzi blinked at him, caught off guard by how normal he seemed. She had been expecting… something different, but maybe the affect of the ‘brownie’ he ate hadn’t kicked in yet. Pushing aside her confusion, she hesitantly responded, “H-…Hey,” She immediately regretted how uncertain she sounded, silently scolding herself for the slight stutter in her voice.

 

N didn’t seem to notice. He smiled warmly and tilted his head. “How are you liking the party so far?”

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes slightly, studying him without making it obvious. He looked completely fine—no signs of anything unusual. Maybe Sam had just been messing with her. Maybe there wasn’t anything in the brownies.

 

…But who was she kidding? Of course that guy hadn’t been lying.

 

She shrugged. “It’s been… alright. Fun, I guess. But now?” She sighed. “I’m kinda bored.”

 

N nodded as if that made perfect sense. But before the conversation could shift, Uzi hesitated, then gave him a cautious look. “Are you, uh… feeling okay?”

 

N looked puzzled at the question, his expression softening in slight confusion. He shook his head, brushing off her concern with an easygoing grin. “I mean, I do feel a little lightheaded, but it’s probably just the lights in here. Why?”

 

Uzi’s grip on her own arm tightened slightly. Oh boy.

 

Uzi sighed, deciding to just rip the bandage off. "Remember that brownie you ate earlier?"

 

N blinked, tilting his head as he thought for a moment. "Yeah," he said, nodding. "A really nice guy gave it to me."he finished his sentence with a warm smile.

 

Uzi stared at him blankly, completely unamused. "That nice guy gave you an edible brownie."

 

N still looked utterly clueless. "Well, obviously it was edible. You can’t eat something that isn’t—"

 

Uzi cut him off with a sharp exhale, resisting the overwhelming urge to facepalm. "Not that kind of edible," she said flatly. She paused before adding, voice laced with dry irritation, "It was a weed brownie, N. You ate the whole thing."

 

At first, N just stared at her, his usual cheerfulness faltering into confusion. It was as if she had just spoken an entirely different language. But then, very slowly, realization dawned.

 

His face paled.

 

His eyes widened.

 

“Oh,” he muttered, his voice barely above a whisper. Then, with growing horror, he cursed under his breath. “Are… Are you serious?”

 

Uzi just nodded, watching as his face twisted into sheer panic.

 

N’s voice wavered slightly, a hint of panic creeping in as he asked, “What… what do I do?”

 

Uzi shrugged, offering the only advice she could think of. “Drink some water or something,” she said, not sounding particularly concerned. “You just have to wait it out.”

 

That was the truth—there wasn’t much else he could do.

 

N let out a nervous laugh, rubbing the back of his head. “Huh. That… actually explains a lot. I was wondering why everything looked so weird.”

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes slightly. “What do you mean?” she asked, curiosity piqued.

 

N glanced around the room, his gaze drifting upward to the ceiling as if it was suddenly the most fascinating thing in existence. Then, after a moment, he spoke. “I dunno, everything just looks brighter. More colorful. And…” He squinted, tilting his head slightly. “It’s like everything’s moving.”

 

Uzi frowned. “Moving?” she repeated, hesitant.

 

Instead of elaborating immediately, N slowly lifted his hand in front of his face and waved it back and forth. His movements were sluggish, deliberate, like he was testing something out. “Like this,” he said, watching his own hand with open fascination.

 

A small, almost childlike grin spread across his face, as if he had just discovered something incredible.

 

Uzi groaned, exhaling sharply as she laid her head back, resting it against the couch cushion. “Yeah. You’re definitely high,” she muttered, closing her eyes for a second as if she could just will this situation away.

 

As Uzi mulled over what else to say to N, a sudden rush of footsteps caught her attention. She turned her head toward the hallway just in time to see the group of drones who had previously left spilling back into the living room. A few of them laughed and teased the two unfortunate drones who had been shoved into the closet, with Lizzy and Braidon leading the playful jeering.

 

The room buzzed with energy, everyone talking, laughing, and appearing to have the time of their lives. Eventually, the group settled back down, finding their spots on the floor or couch to reform the circle for the next round.

 

Thad made his way over to Uzi, but with her sitting at the edge of the couch and N occupying the space beside her, he opted for the armrest instead. Uzi gave him an unimpressed look before raising an eyebrow. “So? How was it?” she asked dryly.

 

Thad chuckled, shaking his head. “You should’ve seen their faces when we opened the door,” he said, still grinning at the memory. “Priceless.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes. “Right. Sounds thrilling.”

 

Thad smirked, then leaned slightly toward her. “Next round, you’re coming with me.”

 

Uzi let out a sharp exhale, already expecting this. She could argue, but she knew Thad well enough to realize that if she refused, he’d keep pestering her until she gave in.

 

“Fine,” she muttered, giving him a sideways glance. “But only because I don’t feel like dealing with you whining about it all night.”

 

Thad only laughed, brushing off Uzi’s remark as if he hadn’t just strong-armed her into playing along.

 

Before Uzi could think too much about it, Lizzy’s voice rang out over the chatter. “Alright, who’s ready for another round?” she called, her usual enthusiasm amplified.

 

A few drones whooped in excitement, some clapping as Lizzy placed the bottle at the center of the circle once again. Without hesitation, she gave it a spin, and the room seemed to collectively lean in, watching as the bottle twirled rapidly.

 

Uzi swallowed, that same uneasy feeling from before creeping up her spine. Her eyes stayed locked on the spinning bottle, silently pleading for it to land on someone—anyone—else. She crossed her fingers, hoping it would glide right past her like last time.

 

But as the momentum slowed, her breath hitched. The bottle’s tip inched closer to her, creeping along its final few rotations in what felt like an agonizing eternity. Come on, keep going… just a little more—

 

Her stomach plummeted as the bottle came to an abrupt stop.

 

The room burst into dramatic oooohs, drones grinning and nudging each other. Thad let out an exaggerated gasp, clutching his chest as if this was the most shocking twist of the night.

 

“Well, well, well,” he teased, nudging her with his elbow. “Look who’s finally in the hot seat. This is huge, Uzi. A monumental moment.”

 

Uzi clenched her jaw, her hands tightening into fists in her lap. She turned to glare at Thad, her voice low and strained. “You have no idea the sheer dread I’m feeling right now,” she muttered through gritted teeth.

 

Thad only grinned wider. “Oh, I can assume. And I gotta say, this is way more fun from my perspective.”

 

Uzi barely restrained herself from smacking him upside the head. But before she could dwell on it, Lizzy spun the bottle again, and the next wave of tension hit her like a truck.

 

She barely breathed as she watched it twirl, knowing that whoever it landed on… she’d be stuck in a closet with them for seven agonizing minutes.

 

The bottle spun, whirling so fast it became nothing more than a blur against the floor. The hum of conversation around the room quieted slightly as everyone watched, anticipation thick in the air.

 

Uzi, however, sat rigidly, barely even blinking. It didn’t matter who the bottle landed on—this was already a nightmare scenario. Every single possible outcome was equally terrible.

 

The bottle began to slow, its rotations becoming lazier, its movements more deliberate. Uzi’s pulse picked up when she realized the tip was pointing her way again. No way.

 

For a split second, she entertained the idea of what would happen if it did land on her. Would she just get a free pass? Would they spin again? Could she slip away before anyone noticed?

 

But to her absolute horror, the bottle didn’t stop on her—it stopped right next to her.

 

N.

 

Uzi stared at it, her mind blank for a moment as the realization settled in like a weight on her shoulders. No.

 

Of all the drones in this stupid game, it had to be him? Honestly, at this point, she might have preferred Thad.

 

She slowly turned her head toward N, only to find him looking back at her, his expression completely neutral—maybe a little puzzled. He clearly had no idea what was about to happen. Given the circumstances, he might not even know what game they were playing at all.

 

The room erupted in laughter and teasing once again, voices overlapping with exaggerated gasps and whistles. Uzi barely registered any of it, her brain still buffering.

 

Then, before she could say anything, she felt hands pressing against her back—someone from behind her was shoving her off the couch.

 

She stumbled forward slightly, catching herself with a glare over her shoulder. “Are you serious right now?” she snapped.

 

Thad was laughing, completely unfazed. “Oh, come on, Uzi,” he grinned. “You have to go. Those are the rules.”

 

Uzi recoiled slightly, shaking her head. “I don’t have to. I don’t want to.” Her voice was strained, her posture stiff.

 

Thad only leaned forward, resting his chin on his hand. “Well, too bad,” he said, a smug lilt in his tone. “Because you’re going.

 

Uzi gritted her teeth, her hands clenching into fists at her sides. This couldn’t be happening.

 

Uzi barely had time to protest before the drones around her were ushering her forward, their excitement outweighing her resistance. She dug her heels in for a moment, but it was useless—if she refused to move, she was pretty sure someone would just pick her up and carry her there instead.

 

Defeated, she let herself be pushed along, her feet moving stiffly down the hallway. Every step felt like she was marching toward some impending doom.

 

She stole a glance over her shoulder at N. He trailed just behind her, looking slightly dazed, though there was a flicker of concern in his expression when their eyes met. He gave a small shrug, as if to say, What are we supposed to do? 

 

Uzi didn’t have an answer to that.

 

The narrow hallway felt suffocating, drones pressing in from both sides, blocking off any possible escape routes. Uzi swallowed hard, her mind racing. Could she make a run for it? If she shoved past Thad and bolted—would they really chase her?

 

But as she subtly scanned for an opening, she realized the answer was yes. There was no way out of this.

 

Lizzy stood at the end of the hallway, right in front of a slightly ajar closet door, a smirk tugging at her lips. She glanced between Uzi and N, clearly reveling in the situation.

 

Uzi’s pulse pounded in her head as Lizzy grabbed the closet handle. The door creaked open.

 

Just as Uzi braced herself for whatever was coming next, a teasing voice called out, “See you in seven minutes!” She barely had time to register it before a sudden force shoved her forward.

 

"Hey!" she snapped, her temper flaring at the audacity of anyone putting their hands on her. But before she could whirl around to confront whoever had done it, her focus shifted to something far more pressing—the fact that she was now inside the closet.

 

The small space was dimly lit, the overhead bulb casting a harsh glow over the cramped interior. Uzi barely managed to catch herself, her palms smacking against the wall as she stumbled. She scowled, her pulse racing with frustration.

 

Instinct kicked in, and she spun toward the door, her last chance at making a break for it. But before she could so much as reach for the handle, A another body was shoved in after her—N—and the door slammed shut with a finality that made her stomach drop.

 

Uzi exhaled sharply, dragging a hand down her face. Of course.

 

She cast a quick glance around the tiny space. Against one of the walls sat a suitcase—just big enough to sit on, though it wasn’t exactly the most comfortable option. With a sigh, she dropped onto it, her knees brushing against the wall in front of her. The limited space only made the situation worse, pressing in around her like a physical weight.

 

This was ridiculous. She wasn’t actually supposed to sit in here for seven whole minutes, was she? Seven? She clenched her jaw, barely resisting the urge to groan aloud. This night just kept getting worse.

 

Notes:

I feel so bad for N 🥲

Like, who knows how much cannabutter Sam put in those brownies - I’m assuming his tolerance is like, relatively high, considering he smokes and does shit like that all the time.

And this is N’s first (and probably last) trip too, and the first trip is usually fucking insane 😭💔 he js wanted a brownie bro and had no idea what he was getting himself into 🥲

On a different topic, I feel like it was pretty predictable that Uzi and N were gonna get chosen for the next game, but like that was kinda the point yk. Who knows what’s gonna happen, though 🫢

Uzi is like, freaking the fuck out, and she’s dramatic asf so that doesn’t help 😭 this situation probably makes her feel like she’s *dying,* and it’s the end of the world for her (in her pov at least)

Then N is over here js kinda vibing LMAO 😭

This whole situation is insane, I wonder what’s gonna happen 🤷

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 40: Or not

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

N sat down beside her on a second suitcase, shifting slightly to get comfortable. The limited space made it impossible to avoid contact, and Uzi immediately tensed as she felt his thigh press against hers.

 

She exhaled sharply, muttering under her breath, “Guess this is actually happening…” Her voice was low, laced with resignation.

 

For a moment, she focused on steadying her breathing, trying to ignore the unbearable awareness of just how small this closet really was. The walls felt closer now, suffocating in a way they hadn’t before. Her face grew warm, and she clenched her jaw, refusing to look at the drone beside her. This is fine. Totally fine. Just seven minutes. Then I can pretend this never happened.

 

She raised her hands, covering her face in pure secondhand embarrassment. But just as she tried to collect herself, N’s voice broke the silence.

 

“Uh…” He hesitated, sounding genuinely puzzled. “Why… exactly did they shove us in here?”

 

Uzi dragged a hand down her face before gritting out, “Because this is some dumb party game they forced us into.” The frustration in her tone was unmistakable, though beneath it was a layer of sheer mortification she was doing her best to suppress.

 

N blinked, looking around as if finally processing the situation. Uzi, meanwhile, was still internally screaming. This was easily the worst possible thing that could’ve happened tonight.

 

Uzi desperately wanted to put some distance between them—any distance—but she knew the limited space made that nearly impossible. Still, the idea of sitting this close for the next seven minutes made her skin crawl with even more secondhand embarrassment, so she decided to at least try shifting away. If she moved slowly, maybe N wouldn’t notice.

 

With painstaking care, she adjusted her posture, attempting to subtly inch to the side. It was barely anything, but even the slightest bit of space would make her feel less like she was suffocating.

 

But just as she thought she was in the clear, N’s voice cut through the silence.

 

“Uh…” He hesitated, his tone uncertain. “Am I… making you uncomfortable?”

 

Uzi froze, her heart lurching in surprise. Crap— he noticed her movement.

 

But then, her mind began to race at his question. Was she uncomfortable? She hadn't really thought about it like that. It wasn’t like she felt unsafe—if it were anyone else in this situation, she probably would’ve just complained and gotten it over with. If it had been a girl, she wouldn’t have cared at all. If it were another guy—hell, even Thad—it would have been weird, sure, but not to this extent.

 

So why did this feel so different? Why did he make her feel so hyperaware, so flustered?

 

Uzi tensed, her fingers twitching slightly as she tried to piece together an answer.

 

Maybe it wasn’t him. Maybe it was just this.

 

The entire situation was humiliating, being shoved into a cramped closet with no say in the matter. It was frustrating, degrading even. That was the only reason she felt this way—why her face was warm, why her nerves were on edge. It had to be. There was no other explanation. She was just pissed off, and her emotions were acting up because of it. Yeah. That made sense.

 

…At least, that’s what she’d keep telling herself.

 

Uzi let out a quiet breath, hesitantly parting her fingers just enough to steal a glance at N. He was looking at her, concern flickering in his glowing eyes. She swallowed, then finally muttered, “Not necessarily…”

 

N’s expression shifted slightly, confusion evident. His brows furrowed like he wanted to ask something, but Uzi spoke up before he could.

 

“It’s not you,” she clarified, lowering her hands and looking away again. “I just hate… all of this. I hate being forced into this stupid game.”

 

N remained quiet for a second, his face unreadable. Then, to her surprise, he let out a small sigh and said, “I’m sorry—….”

 

His voice was soft, laced with guilt—like he had been the one to shove her in here.

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard. That was… not what she expected.

 

She shook her head, exhaling through her nose. “It’s not your fault,” she muttered, arms crossing over her chest. “We didn’t ask for this.”

 

N nodded slightly, but the guilty look didn’t fully leave his face.

 

The silence between them grew heavier with each passing second, pressing down on Uzi like a weight. It wasn’t like the usual silences she had with N—those never felt this thick, this suffocating . No, this was something different. Something awkward and tense, something she hated.

 

And the worst part? The nagging fear that it wouldn’t just end when they stepped out of this closet.

 

What if things stayed weird between them after this? What if this stupid party game ruined their friendship? N was one of the few drones she actually enjoyed being around—losing him over something so ridiculous wasn’t an option.

 

Uzi clenched her jaw, a quiet determination settling over her. If she had to be stuck in here, she refused to let it be like this. If she acted normal, kept things casual, maybe N would follow suit. Maybe they could both pretend this never happened and move on.

 

But… what was she even supposed to say?

 

She wasn’t about to ask something idiotic like ’So… come here often?’ No way.

 

Her mind scrambled for anything, any topic that wouldn’t make her want to crawl out of her own metal casing. What had even been happening lately? Not much, really. Nothing significant in their friend group, no big events—nothing. Actually, now that she thought about it… she and N hadn’t really talked much recently. Sure, they still saw each other at school, but their conversations had been brief—just passing comments, small talk during lunch.

 

Not like before.

 

Not like the usual, where they actually talked.

 

When did that even start? And why?

 

Uzi’s gaze drifted absently to the floor, her processors whirring sluggishly beneath the storm of thoughts clouding her mind. She barely even registered the faint hum of the closet’s dim light overhead or the subtle creak of the door as it settled against its frame. Her thoughts were moving far too fast, pulling her into memories she hadn’t meant to revisit.

 

She vaguely recalled N texting her a few times over the past week—simple messages. Just checking in, asking how she was doing. And yet, for some inexplicable reason, every time she saw his name flash across her screen, she found herself making excuses. She’d glance at the message, tell herself she was busy—even when she wasn’t—and leave it sitting there. She always responded eventually, but not right away. Never right away. Hours would pass before she typed out some halfhearted reply, brushing it off with casual indifference.

 

But why?

 

A flicker of guilt sparked in her chest. She hadn’t realized how much she’d been keeping him at arm’s length until now. She’d been distant. Too distant.

 

And she knew exactly when it started.

 

Last Friday night… at the school. After her attempted and miserably failed‘investigation.’

 

Her core sank slightly, just remembering it. Everything had been fine—fun, even—until it wasn’t. Until everything came crashing down. The sudden attack from V. The horrifying revelation about N and V being ‘disassembly drones.’ The twisted truth about the student’s murder—that N had known all along and never said a word. The realization that, in a way, he had lied to her. It had left her disoriented, betrayed, and completely disarmed.

 

She had been upset at first, but couldn’t stay angry at him. N had ended up saving her life—more than once, technically. She knew he wasn’t cruel or malicious. He wasn’t like V. He was just… N. Kind and stupidly selfless. She knew that.

 

But still… she couldn’t shake the raw, fractured feeling she had after everything. The confusion, the emotional whiplash—it was too much. And instead of dealing with it, she had instinctively withdrawn. Without even realizing it, she’d been shutting him out.

 

And now, sitting here, thigh pressed against his in this cramped closet, she was forced to face that awful realization head-on. She felt like a complete jerk. N didn’t deserve that. He had only ever tried to help her—to protect her. And she’d just left him in the dark. Alone.

 

Uzi’s spark twisted painfully in her chest. She couldn’t not say something. Not anymore.

 

Uzi’s fingers tightened subtly around the edge of the suitcase beneath her, the cold metal frame biting against her palm. She willed herself to speak, but her voice caught somewhere in her throat. For a brief moment, she hesitated, her circuits buzzing with indecision. The last thing she wanted was to be vulnerable—especially now. Her instincts begged her to just stay quiet, to let the tension linger in the silence until the seven minutes were over.

 

But she couldn’t.

 

She drew in a slow, shallow breath, forcing her voice to come out steady, even if it was a little softer than she intended. With a quick glance at the wall, avoiding his eyes, she began to speak,”Hey– N… I’m sorry that I’ve been distant the past week.” she muttered, her voice wavering slightly at the end, the words unexpectedly heavy now that she was actually saying them out loud.

 

At first, N didn’t react. He turned his head slightly in her direction, his expression vaguely curious but unreadable. He didn’t speak—didn’t push her for an explanation. He just waited, giving her the space to continue.

 

Uzi swallowed hard, exhaling through her nose. She forced herself to turn to meet his eyes, even though it made her stomach twist uncomfortably. Her voice was low and uneven as she continued,“It’s not you, it’s—“

 

Her words snagged halfway through, and she froze. She nearly winced at herself, realizing too late the sentence she had started. Oh, hell no. She was not about to say, ‘It’s not you, it’s me.’ That was the most overused, cliché, garbage line in existence. She would sooner rip out her own voice modulator.

 

But she was already mid-sentence—no turning back now.

 

Uzi’s fingers curled into a light fist on her knee as she hastily corrected herself. ”It’s just… everything that’s been going on.” Her shoulders tensed as she spoke, eyes casting downward briefly before meeting his again. “I guess I’ve just been—…struggling to process it all. I didn’t mean to shut you out, but that’s what ended up happening. Again, I’m sorry…”

 

Her words fell into the space between them, raw and quiet.

 

And as they did, something sharp and unpleasant twisted inside her chest. Resentment.

 

Uzi’s fingers clenched slightly on the metal edge beneath her. She hated this. Hated admitting when she was wrong. It made her feel small, exposed. Like she was peeling away her skin piece by piece, leaving her core open and vulnerable. She wanted nothing more than to just shut down and brush it all off with some sarcastic deflection.

 

But she couldn’t.

 

Because if she didn’t say it now, when would she ever?

 

N’s head tilted slightly, his expression softening as he looked at her. The flicker of sadness in his eyes made Uzi’s chest tighten, and she braced herself, unsure of what he was about to say. His voice was quiet—barely above a whisper—as he spoke, the vulnerability in his tone catching her off guard.

 

“Really?” he murmured, almost disbelieving. His eyes flicked downward for a moment, and when they lifted back to hers, there was a rawness to them that made her throat clench. His voice wavered slightly as he admitted, “I… I thought you hated me.”

 

Uzi’s eyes widened slightly, completely unprepared for those words. She stared at him, stunned, her breath catching in her throat. That was not what she had expected. She had braced herself for the usual—the easy forgiveness he always gave, maybe a casual ‘it’s okay’ like he always said. She had been ready for him to let her off the hook, like he always did, no matter what. But this?

 

Her hands tightened into fists in her lap, a dull ache settling in her chest. She didn’t know if it was the confusion on his face, the softness in his voice, or the fact that he genuinely believed she could feel that way about him—but something about it made her stomach twist with guilt.

 

But then, it hit her. He was still high. Of course he was—she could see the slight red haze lingering behind his eyes. That meant he was probably saying exactly what he felt—completely unfiltered, raw, and genuine. That realization made her heart sink even further. Had he actually been thinking that this entire time?

 

For a moment, Uzi didn’t know what to say. She simply stared at him, her mouth slightly parted but no words came out. She was shocked that she had made him feel that way—her. The one drone in this godforsaken school who probably trusted him more than anyone. And she had made him think she hated him?

 

Her throat tightened, but she forced herself to push through it. She slowly shook her head, her eyes softening as she met his gaze. She didn’t want him to question this for even a second.

 

“No,” she whispered firmly, her voice steady despite the knot building in her chest. She shook her head again, more emphatically this time. “No, I don’t hate you.” Her words came out with quiet conviction, her eyes fixed on his with unwavering sincerity.

 

She hesitated for the briefest moment, then added, her voice barely above a murmur, “I care about you. A lot.”

 

Her tone was so earnest that it made N blink, as if unsure he had heard her right. His eyes searched hers, and for once, she didn’t look away. She let him see the sincerity in her expression—the way her eyes softened at the edges, the subtle parting of her lips as she caught her breath.

 

The weight in her chest only grew heavier, but she didn’t falter. She needed him to know the truth—even if she didn’t know how to say it perfectly, she needed him to know this.

 

N’s eyes softened as he processed her words, but instead of brightening, his expression grew strangely solemn. His lips pressed into a faint pout, a shadow of melancholy flickering behind his eyes. It was a small shift—barely noticeable—but it made Uzi’s chest tighten all the same. He didn’t look relieved by her reassurance. If anything, he looked… sad. Like he hadn’t expected her to say that at all.

 

After a lingering moment of silence, he finally spoke again, his voice low and quiet. At first, his words seemed to veer off in a completely different direction, catching Uzi off guard.

 

“It’s been kinda hard recently, you know…” he muttered softly, trailing off. His eyes drifted downward, as if he were speaking more to himself than to her. His tone was casual—like an offhanded comment—but Uzi could hear the weight behind it. His voice was thinner, more fragile than before. Then, as if suddenly realizing how that might sound, he quickly added, “Not because of you. Because of everything else—”

 

Uzi’s gaze lingered on him, her brow furrowing slightly. She didn’t know what he meant by everything else, frankly, she had no idea what he was talking about period. But she kept quiet, listening intently.

 

N exhaled softly through his nose and gave a small shrug, trying to make his voice sound lighter than it was. He glanced briefly at the wall, avoiding her eyes. “My parents were home recently,” he admitted quietly. “They come back, like… once a month. For a day or two.”

 

His voice wavered slightly, and he shifted where he sat, his hands loosely clasped together in his lap. His thumbs rubbed absently over each other, a nervous fidget he probably didn’t even realize he was doing.

 

The words came out slowly, almost as if he were testing them, seeing how they felt out loud. “But they still don’t really… notice me. They’re just kinda… there.” His voice grew fainter with each word, like he was retreating into himself.

 

He trailed off for a moment, staring distantly at the floor as a pensive silence fell over him. Uzi’s eyes remained fixed on him, watching the way his jaw subtly tightened, the way his gaze grew duller. She could feel the faint pang of sympathy stirring in her chest, but she stayed silent, giving him space to speak.

 

After a beat, he exhaled slowly, shakily, as if forcing himself to continue. His eyes shifted back to hers, hesitant and vulnerable, and his voice was barely above a murmur.

 

“When you stopped talking to me,” he confessed softly, his tone uncertain, “it kinda made me think of that.”

 

His eyes searched hers, almost cautiously, as if he was bracing himself for her reaction. The slight waver in his voice made Uzi’s stomach twist. It wasn’t an accusation—there was no bitterness in his words. Just quiet honesty. A simple admittance of how it had made him feel.

 

And that was somehow worse.

 

For a fleeting moment, Uzi didn’t know how to respond. She sat there, completely still, as her mind twisted into knots. The weight of N’s words lingered heavily in the air, sinking into her chest like a stone. It rattled her—really rattled her. She had expected to feel guilty, sure, but this was worse. His voice had been so soft, so quietly hurt, and it made her stomach churn uncomfortably.

 

A part of her wanted to apologize again—to just say sorry and try to move past it. But the thought made her hesitate. She didn’t know if another apology would even mean anything right now. Would it make him feel any better? Or would it just seem… hollow? Distant? She suddenly feared that saying the wrong thing might make it worse—that her words would come off as disingenuous, like she was just apologizing to placate him, not because she meant it.

 

Her eyes flicked to him again. He was looking down slightly, his expression unreadable, but there was a faint vulnerability in the way his hands rested in his lap—still loosely fidgeting, his fingers picking faintly at his own palm. A nervous tic, subtle and barely noticeable, but it struck her.

 

Before she even fully processed the thought, Uzi moved—hesitant, unsure, but instinctive. Slowly, she shifted ever so slightly closer to him, closing the already small gap between them. She hesitated only briefly before reaching out, her hands trembling faintly with the smallest bit of uncertainty. Gently, she took his hand in hers.

 

His hand was warm, his skin slightly rough against her own, but she held it carefully, as though afraid it might break. Her thumbs lightly brushed over the back of his hand, tracing slow, comforting circles. She kept her touch featherlight, unsure of whether she was being reassuring or just… awkward. She wasn’t used to this—she didn’t do this. But right now, she didn’t care. She just wanted him to feel better.

 

For a second, N didn’t react. His eyes remained downcast, and his hand was limp in hers. But when she softly stroked her thumb over his knuckles again, she felt the faintest shift—his fingers twitched slightly against hers, almost like he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to hold on.

 

Her voice was soft when she finally spoke, gentle but firm—trying her best to sound calm, even if her heart was hammering against her chest.

 

“Hey…” she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper. “You’re still high, N,” She forced a small, reassuring smile, despite the lump forming in her throat. “Don’t… Don’t get yourself worked up, okay?”

 

Her tone was careful—light, almost teasing, but she was earnestly trying to keep him grounded. She gave his hand the faintest squeeze, her thumbs still slowly brushing over his skin. “It’s gonna be okay. I promise.”

 

For a moment, she worried she had overstepped. That maybe this was too much—that maybe he would pull back or laugh it off awkwardly. But to her surprise, she felt his grip tighten slightly around her hands. It was tentative at first, almost shy, but then a bit firmer—a quiet, wordless gesture that said I don’t want to let go.

 

And then, slowly, he leaned into her.

 

The movement was subtle, but Uzi could feel the gradual weight as he shifted closer, his shoulder lightly brushing hers before dipping slightly against it. His frame pressed faintly into her side, and without a second thought, she instinctively adjusted to let him rest against her.

 

The height difference made it a little awkward—his head tilted slightly downward due to his taller frame—but strangely, she didn’t feel embarrassed. Not even a little. In fact, she barely noticed. Any self-consciousness she might have felt was buried under the quiet, almost protective impulse that kept her hand firmly clasped around his.

 

She stayed perfectly still, her breathing slow and steady, the warmth of his hand pulsing faintly against hers. She could feel the slight tremor still lingering in his fingers—a faint shakiness he probably didn’t even realize was there.

 

But she didn’t let go.

 

For a moment, Uzi kept her gaze downward, her eyes half-lidded as she focused on the rhythmic sensation of his hand in hers. She could feel the subtle, steady brush of his fingers against her skin—the faint pressure where he held on just a little tighter than before. She had been so focused on staying still, on keeping calm, that she didn’t even register the way her eyes gradually drifted upward.

 

And that was when she realized just how close they were.

 

She turned her head slightly, only to find her eyes meeting his—immediately locking with his softened, half-lidded gaze. Her breath caught faintly in her throat.

 

He was right there. Close enough that she could clearly see the dim reflection of the closet’s small light in his eyes, close enough that she could catch every slight shift in his expression—the faint crease of his brows, the gentle part of his lips. She could even feel the faintest brush of his breath against her, warm and steady.

 

The sudden closeness caught her completely off guard. Her pulse quickened slightly, and she felt an involuntary heat creep up her neck and into her face. Why is it so hot in here all of a sudden? she thought, feeling the way her face flushed with warmth.

 

Her mind scrambled to make sense of the feeling—was she flustered? Embarrassed? She wasn’t sure. Her stomach flipped uneasily, and her hand twitched faintly in his grasp, her fingers trembling slightly despite herself.

 

And then, just as she was trying to regain her composure, she heard him murmur softly under his breath.

 

“So pretty…”

 

The words were so quiet, so faint, that for a second, she wasn’t sure she had heard them at all. But then his eyes lingered on her, distant and slightly hazy with that same dreamy, half-conscious look.

 

Her breath hitched.

 

Her entire body stiffened slightly, her fingers involuntarily tightening around his hand as her thoughts immediately spiraled. Wait…

 

Had she… had she just heard him right?

 

No. No, she had to be imagining things. Maybe she had misheard him. Maybe she was so caught up in the moment that she was just assuming she had heard what she wanted to hear. There was no way he had just said that—about her.

 

But her stomach still knotted uncomfortably. What if he did?

 

Her mind reeled, scrambling for a rational explanation. He was still high, obviously. That had to be it. He probably didn’t even realize what he was saying. His filter was completely gone—he was just babbling random nonsense, and she was overthinking it. That had to be it. It had to.

 

But regardless of whatever mental gymnastics she was trying to pull, none of it did anything to cool the sudden heat rising in her chest. Her face was practically burning now, and the dull, twisting sensation in her stomach refused to settle.

 

Her heart was hammering. She could hear it in her own ears, pulsing faintly behind the rush of her thoughts.

 

She kept her face carefully still, trying desperately not to let her expression betray the absolute freak out she was having internally. But her fingers subtly twitched in his grasp, and she could feel her hand growing slightly clammy against his.

 

Her eyes dropped for a moment, unable to meet his, but no matter how she tried to rationalize it, the words still rang in her ears, soft and unshaken.

 

So pretty…

 

The moment felt like it stretched on forever.

 

Uzi was frozen, completely and utterly paralyzed. Her breath caught sharply in her throat, the air suddenly feeling too thick, too heavy to pull in. Her limbs were rigid, her hands still loosely tangled with his, but she couldn’t even feel them anymore—her entire body was numb, save for the feverish warmth pulsing in her chest.

 

Her thoughts were barely coherent, frantically skipping from one fleeting, disjointed notion to the next. Just pull away, her mind half-whispered. Just move. She could end this. She could pull back, break away from the moment. That would be the sensible thing to do.

 

But… she didn’t move.

 

And then, just as she was on the verge of making herself do it—of pulling away and scrambling for distance—she felt the gentle, sudden warmth of him leaning in.

 

And before she could even register what was happening, his lips were on hers.

Notes:

AHHHHHHHHH posting the next chapter is tomorrow

You’ll js have to wait and see what happens 😈

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 41: Close

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Soft. Gentle. Featherlight.

 

It wasn’t rough or desperate—it was slow, tender, and utterly deliberate. There was no uncertainty in the way he kissed her—no hesitation, despite how tentative the motion was. It was meaningful. Intentional.

 

Uzi’s eyes widened ever so slightly, a sharp gasp catching in her throat, but her body betrayed her. Without thinking—without even processing—she instinctively leaned into it.

 

Her hands, once trembling, stilled against his. Her fingers subtly curled into his palm, clutching faintly as if afraid to let go.

 

But then she did let go.

 

Because she felt him shift slightly, his hand slipping free from hers, only to rise slowly toward her face.

 

Her heart slammed violently in her chest when she felt the faint, barely-there brush of his knuckles along her cheek. His touch was light—hesitant at first, as if unsure. But then his palm slowly, carefully, cupped the side of her face, cradling her jawline with a reverence so delicate it made her chest tighten.

 

Her breath hitched faintly when she felt the soft drag of his index finger, barely grazing against her skin as he tucked a stray strand of her hair behind her ear. His touch was so light—so painstakingly gentle—that it left a dull tingling in its wake.

 

Their mouths moved slowly, tentatively, falling into an unhurried rhythm. Each press of their lips was delicate, almost shy—like they were both testing the waters, unsure of how far to go, but unable to stop. The warmth of his breath fanned against her face with each slow exhale, and her chest tightened further with every soft, lingering brush of his lips against hers.

 

Her fingers, trembling ever so slightly, curled faintly into the fabric of the sleeve of her jacket, gripping it without even realizing.

 

But suddenly, she couldn’t take it anymore.

 

Without warning, the reality of the situation slammed into her, sharp and unrelenting. Her stomach dropped violently, and she recoiled, jerking back as though she had just touched a live wire.

 

Her hands shot up, covering her face with trembling fingers as she drew in a sharp, shallow breath. Her chest heaved slightly, rising and falling far too quickly, and her entire face was practically on fire. Her palms pressed over her cheeks, but she could still feel the heat burning beneath her hands, her skin feverish to the touch.

 

I—I can’t…” she stammered hoarsely, her voice uneven and cracking slightly with embarrassment. She forced the words out through her hands, her face still buried against them.

 

Her entire body was trembling faintly, and her throat tightened with the weight of her voice. “I…” she tried again, her voice quieter this time—breathless, disbelieving. “I can’t do this. This feels—”

 

Her voice caught slightly, and she cursed under her breath, the words barely audible. “Damn it…” She shook her head subtly, as if trying to physically shake off the moment—the heat, the sudden wave of conflicted emotions threatening to overwhelm her.

 

Her entire chest felt tight, and her face was still burning with residual heat. She could barely breathe.

 

What the hell just happened?

 

N’s hand had lingered in the empty space where her face had been for a moment, his fingers still slightly curled as though waiting to brush against her cheek again. But when he finally realized she was no longer there, his expression flickered with a faint, stunned confusion.

 

Slowly, as if on autopilot, he drew his hand back toward himself, trembling slightly. His fingers hovered uncertainly for a brief moment before he pressed them against his lips. The motion was almost unconscious, like he was trying to physically stifle the breathless disbelief spilling from his mouth.

 

“I—” His voice was low, shaking faintly. His words caught in his throat, clumsy and disjointed as they tumbled out too quickly.

 

“I—I'm sorry.” His eyes widened slightly, and his voice became more frantic, spilling out in a nervous rush. “I—I didn’t mean to—” he stammered, shaking his head faintly as he fumbled for words, his voice cracking slightly with desperation. “I wasn’t— I wasn’t thinking. I—”

 

He cut himself off sharply, squeezing his eyes shut for a brief moment as if trying to block out the sudden, suffocating weight of mortification pressing down on him. His voice fell quieter, barely more than a breath. “I’m sorry…” he murmured again, the words breaking unevenly at the edges, thick with guilt.

 

His hand fell slowly from his mouth, and his eyes dropped to the floor. His voice was barely audible when he muttered under his breath, the words almost lost in the shallow breath he exhaled.

 

I ruined everything…

 

Uzi’s chest tightened faintly at the self-loathing in his voice. She could practically feel the sharp pang of regret hanging in the heavy silence between them, as if he genuinely believed that everything—their friendship, their trust—had just shattered beyond repair.

 

Her own hands were still pressed against her face, but they were trembling slightly. She was still reeling—her heart pounding violently in her chest, her thoughts still clouded by the residual heat thrumming through her circuits. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, inhaling shakily, trying to steady herself.

 

When she exhaled, her voice came out quiet and slightly hoarse, but steady enough. “It’s fine…”

 

The words were blunt—matter-of-fact, but not cold. Just… honest.

 

Her hands slowly lowered from her face, her fingers still slightly unsteady. She let out a slow, uneven breath, willing her chest to loosen, but it remained tight. Still, she pressed on.

 

“I’m not… mad.” Her voice softened slightly, her tone firm, but not unkind. She glanced down briefly, struggling to form the right words. “I just—” She exhaled sharply, her voice growing quieter with the admission. “I just… don’t know how to process this right now.”

 

Her voice faltered at the end, the words slipping out breathlessly, but she meant them. It wasn’t a lie. She wasn’t angry. She wasn’t upset. She was just… disoriented. Like the ground had been ripped out from under her feet.

 

As her voice faded, she finally glanced at him.

 

Her chest clenched at the sight of him.

 

N was staring down at the floor, his posture slightly hunched in on itself. His hands were loosely clasped together in his lap, but she could see the faintest tremor in his fingers. His jaw was subtly clenched, but his eyes were wide—filled with a quiet, desperate uncertainty.

 

But it was the look in his eyes that made her stomach twist.

 

He looked worried. Not just anxious or embarrassed—but genuinely distressed, as if he were convinced he had just made some unforgivable mistake. As if he were bracing himself for her to push him away entirely.

 

And that… hurt.

 

Why did he look like that?

 

Like he had just lost something he could never get back.

 

And in that moment, despite the lingering confusion, despite the swirling mess of emotions twisting in her chest, Uzi felt a sharp pang of guilt settle heavily in her stomach.

 

She couldn’t let him think that.

 

Uzi’s mind was still reeling—her thoughts a swirling, tangled mess of guilt, confusion, and lingering heat in her chest—when, suddenly, the room was plunged into darkness.

 

Her breath caught sharply.

 

For a split second, she was startled, unsure if her mind was playing tricks on her. But then she heard it—a faint, muffled snicker from the other side of the door.

 

She felt a sharp jolt of anger rise up within her.

 

Her stunned confusion quickly snapped into something far more visceral—seething frustration, boiling up in her chest like a white-hot spark.

 

Are you kidding me?!

 

Her eyes narrowed in the darkness, though it was useless—she couldn’t see anything. Though, she could hear them—the faint, stifled laughter that made her oil simmer.

 

Were they listening the entire time?

 

The thought sent a heated flush through her face, but this time, it wasn’t from embarrassment—it was fury.

 

Her fists curled at her sides, trembling. She felt a sharp, overwhelming urge to slam her fist against the door, to send a message. To let them know just how not funny this was.

 

Without thinking, she raised her hand.

 

But just as she was about to strike, her knuckles brushed lightly against something.

 

Something warm.

 

Her breath stilled.

 

For a fraction of a second, she froze, her hand lingering midair. It took her brain a moment to register what had just happened—what she had just touched.

 

His hand.

 

Even though she couldn’t see him clearly anymore, she knew. She had felt the shape of his fingers—the slight tremor still lingering in them. The warmth of his palm was fleeting, barely there, but it was enough to make her stomach twist.

 

Her hand instinctively recoiled slightly, but the momentary contact was all it took.

 

The crackling frustration boiling in her chest suddenly flickered, faltering slightly.

 

Damn it…

 

Uzi slowly drew her hand back to herself, clenching her fingers slightly against her palm. Her knuckles pressed lightly against her leg, silently grounding herself.

 

She swallowed thickly, her throat dry.

 

Her anger didn’t disappear entirely, but the sharp edge of it somewhat dulled. The room was still dark, the laughter still faintly audible through the door, but her attention was no longer on it.

 

Instead, she found herself focusing on the faint silhouette of the drone beside her.

 

Even in the pitch blackness, her eyes instinctively sought him out.

 

The faintest trace of light slipped through the tiny gap beneath the door, casting a dim, hazy outline around him. She could barely see his features, but she could make out enough—the vague shape of his frame, the soft curve of his head, the gentle rise and fall of his chest.

 

And she could feel his eyes on her.

 

She couldn’t see them, not really, but she felt them. The way his faint silhouette seemed to still slightly, subtly facing toward her.

 

Her breath caught in her throat.

 

He’s looking at me…

 

She didn’t know why that made her chest feel suddenly so tight.

 

There was a lingering, almost palpable tension in the dark—a heavy stillness that seemed to fill the tiny space between them. The silence pressed against her ears, thick and suffocating.

 

And it made her stomach twist.

 

What do I do?

 

Her fists loosened slightly, her fingers twitching faintly against her leg.

 

She could feel the residual heat still clinging to her face—her skin was burning, her circuits practically buzzing. She felt the uneven hitch in her breath, the way her fingers curled faintly against her lap, restless, unsure.

 

Say something.

 

Do something.

 

But what?

 

She was painfully aware of the closeness between them—the way she could still faintly feel the lingering warmth of his hand against hers, the barely-there space that separated their bodies.

 

She didn’t know if she could trust her own voice in that moment, afraid that if she spoke, it would crack or betray her flustered state.

 

But at the same time, again she knew she had to say something—do somethinganything—to break the tension.

 

Her hands clenched faintly against her lap, her heart pounding against her chest.

 

She just… didn’t know what.

 

For a fleeting moment, Uzi remained perfectly still, her body rigid with tension, her hands faintly trembling against her lap. Her heart was pounding so violently in her chest she could feel it reverberating in her throat.

 

But then, suddenly—she couldn’t take it anymore.

 

Fuck it.

 

A sharp, reckless surge of determination coursed through her, overwhelming the hesitation that had been suffocating her moments ago.

 

Why am I just sitting here?

 

Her fingers twitched faintly against her leg. She felt the faint, electric pull in her chest—the heavy thrumming that made her throat tighten and her limbs feel restless.

 

She inhaled sharply, and before she could second-guess herself, she reached out.

 

Her hand moved cautiously at first, blindly searching in the dark until her fingertips brushed against something solid—him.

 

She felt him flinch slightly at the unexpected contact. His body stiffened, caught off guard, but he didn’t recoil.

 

Her palm found his face—cool metal beneath her fingertips, a faint tremor lingering in his frame.

 

Her thumb traced a slow, deliberate path along the smooth surface of his cheek, then drifted downward, brushing faintly over the edge of his jaw. Without thinking, her fingers moved further, finding his lips.

 

Her breath hitched slightly when she felt the soft, barely-there warmth of his mouth beneath her touch.

 

What am I doing?

 

Her heart stuttered violently in her chest.

 

Her thumb brushed slowly, tentatively over his bottom lip—a fleeting, delicate stroke—and she felt his breath catch faintly.

 

“Uzi…” His voice was barely above a whisper.

 

Her circuits were practically buzzing, her nerves raw and frayed, but she didn’t pull back. She didn’t want to.

 

She exhaled shakily, and with a sudden, impulsive resolve, she leaned in.

 

The space between them vanished.

 

Her lips pressed softly against his.

 

For a fraction of a second, everything stilled.

 

The world seemed to fall completely, utterly silent—the faint laughter from the other side of the door, the distant muffled sounds of the party, the static hum in the back of her mind—it all faded into nothing.

 

There was only this.

 

Him.

 

Her chest tightened faintly, her breath still caught in her throat.

 

But then, instead of stiffening or pulling away, N’s frame softened. Slowly but surely, he melted into the kiss.

 

The tension in his body eased. She felt the faintest exhale brush against her cheek, felt the subtle tremor in his lips as he kissed her back.

 

And just like that, the hesitance that had been clinging to her slipped away.

 

Her grip on his face loosened slightly, but her lips remained pressed softly to his. She tilted her head faintly, instinctively adjusting as their mouths moved in a slow, searching rhythm—uncertain but increasingly familiar.

 

His lips were soft, hesitant at first—a gentle, fleeting pressure—but with each tentative exchange, the kiss deepened slightly.

 

Without thinking, Uzi shifted closer.

 

The space between them narrowed until there was hardly anything left. She felt his body brush faintly against hers—a barely-there contact that sent a faint shiver through her frame.

 

And then, slowly, his arms moved.

 

She didn’t realize it at first—her thoughts were too scattered, her chest too tight—but gradually, she became aware of the subtle pressure against her waist.

 

His hands, trembling slightly, drifted forward.

 

They moved tentatively at first, hovering faintly at her sides before slowly, delicately, winding around her.

 

And then he pulled her in.

 

Her chest met his, her frame pressed lightly against him as he enveloped her in his arms.

 

The shift was so seamless, so natural, it was as if neither of them realized it was happening—it simply did.

 

She felt his arms tighten faintly, holding her close, and she felt herself sinking into it.

 

Her hands slipped from his face and instinctively curled around his frame, gripping faintly at the back of his shirt.

 

The kiss deepened faintly with the closeness, the soft, unhurried rhythm growing warmer.

 

And slowly—so slowly—she felt herself begin to relax.

 

The raw-edged nerves that had been screaming in her head moments ago, gradually dulled to a faint, quiet hum.

 

The haze in her chest eased slightly.

 

She allowed herself to lean into him.

 

Her grip on his shirt loosened slightly, her fingers curling faintly against the fabric as she exhaled softly against his lips.

 

For once, she wasn’t overthinking.

 

Her mind, usually loud and restless, was quiet.

 

For once, she wasn’t agonizing over what to say next, or worrying about what might happen, or drowning herself in self-doubt.

 

For once, she wasn’t thinking at all.

 

She was simply… feeling.

 

The way his arms tightened around her waist with a faint, almost protective hold. The way his lips moved slowly but deliberately against hers, hesitant but again increasingly familiar. The way his warmth lingered faintly on her skin.

 

For once, she didn’t want to think about anything else.

 

She just wanted to think about him.

 

Uzi’s breathing was uneven, her chest rising and falling rapidly as she pressed herself into him. She couldn’t think, couldn’t focus on anything else—her head was spinning, clouded with the intoxicating rush of this moment, but she didn’t care.

 

Her hand moved on instinct.

 

Without breaking the kiss, her fingers drifted upward. Slowly, she trailed her hand behind his head, feeling the cool edges of his frame beneath her fingertips before burying them into his hair.

 

The strands were surprisingly soft, with a silkiness that slipped through her fingers.

 

Her breath hitched slightly as she curled her hand, gripping faintly at the back of his head. And then—without fully realizing it—she gave a gentle tug.

 

She felt him jolt faintly at the sudden sensation.

 

His frame stiffened beneath her, his lips parting briefly in surprise—but the soft, staggered breath he exhaled against her mouth wasn’t one of discomfort.

 

If anything, she felt him melt into her even further.

 

A faint, barely perceptible tremor coursed through him, but instead of faltering, his hold on her tightened.

 

His hands—once loosely settled around her waist—drifted upward, slipping higher along her back.

 

His arms pressed firmly around her, his hands splaying softly against her spine as he clutched her closer—desperate to close what little space was left between them.

 

The shift made the kiss deepen further.

 

The soft, tentative rhythm they’d begun with grew bolder—more assured.

 

His lips moved slowly but deliberately against hers, no longer as hesitant, the quiet uncertainty giving way to something warmer, something needier.

 

And Uzi was lost in it.

 

Her fingers tightened faintly in his hair, clinging to him.

 

She was engulfed by the feeling of his arms around her—the warmth of his hold, the subtle tremor in his grip that made her knees feel weak.

 

Her chest pressed against his as she leaned further in, blindly chasing after the warmth of his mouth.

 

The faint brush of their lips, the slow, deliberate tug of her hand against his hair, the possessive way his arms clutched her closer—it all made her head spin.

 

She didn’t even know how to describe this feeling.

 

It was a muddled blur of confusion and desperation and want.

 

Whatever this was—this disorienting, heart-pounding, overwhelming sensation—it made her limbs feel shaky, made her frame buzz faintly with a strange, unplaceable heat.

 

But she didn’t want it to stop.

 

She wanted more of it.

 

She leaned further into him, chasing after his mouth with a slow, seeking press of her lips, blindly closing any remaining distance between them.

 

In the faint shift of their movements, she felt his back softly thud against the wall.

 

He let out a faint, staggered breath against her mouth, but he didn’t stop.

 

Uzi paused to breathe for a mere moment, muttering into his mouth,”Fuck—…” she swallowed, before hastily leaning back in.

 

His grip on her tightened, his hands moving faintly along her back—exploring without fully realizing it—his arms winding her closer, as if he physically couldn’t bear the distance.

 

She felt the faint vibration of his breath against her lips, uneven and slightly shaky.

 

Her frame pressed further against him, the faintest, subtle friction of their bodies meeting sending a quiet shiver down her spine.

 

And she didn’t care about anything else.

 

Her free hand drifted downward, her arm winding loosely around his waist.

 

Her fingers once more curled faintly against the fabric of his shirt, gripping the material softly, keeping him close.

 

She barely even realized she was moving.

 

She barely even realized she was thinking.

 

She just wanted to be close to him—closer.

 

And she would have stayed there for however long she could, clinging to him, if it weren’t for the sudden, piercing sound that shattered the moment.

 

A voice. Loud, slurred, and far too close.

 

It echoed sharply from the other side of the door, jarring her from her haze.

 

Her eyes shot open.

 

The warmth of N’s lips was instantly replaced by the disorienting crash of reality.

 

Her heart stuttered violently, then plummeted.

 

Her entire frame jolted in startled alarm, the faint buzz in her circuits instantly cutting out.

 

She snapped her attention toward the door, panic flooding through her.

 

She could hear faint, breathy snickering just beyond the thin barrier—a cruel, teasing sound that made her stomach twist violently.

 

Oh no.

 

Her heart was pounding erratically, the remnants of adrenaline from the kiss still racing through her veins, now tangled with the sharp, frantic pulse of panic.

 

She froze.

 

Her lips parted faintly in alarm, her frame going still for a fraction of a second.

 

And then—before she could even think—she shoved herself away from him.

 

Her limbs moved purely on instinct, snapping back to the wall she’d originally been pressed against.

 

Her hands uncurled from his shirt, falling limply into her lap, her fingers faintly trembling as she forced herself to retreat.

 

Her breath was still uneven—sharp and shallow—but she willed herself to stay still.

 

To act as if nothing had happened.

 

Her face burned violently, her circuits still buzzing faintly from the contact, but she clamped down on it.

 

Her eyes were wide, frantic, but she hastily lowered her head, desperately trying to keep her expression neutral.

 

Her gaze flicked toward the door, her chest heaving slightly as she tried to compose herself.

 

And then, she saw the faint sliver of light creeping in from the corner.

 

The door was opening.

Notes:

……………

AHHHHH

Sorry for giving you guys blue balls, it’s gonna be ok 🤕

LMAO anyways

At long last, here’s a kiss scene ig 😭 ik it took forever, hopefully it was worth the wait 💔

Oh yeah also I’m js gonna put it out there— I’m *not* gonna be writing smut at any point and I’m not even gonna consider it (cuz they’re literally minors, or like I imagine Uzi as 17 and N as newly 18, but still it’s js weird to me. And being like “they’re both basically 18 so they’re adults 🤓☝️” doesn’t justify writing that, in my opinion 💀) BUT like, Im obvi still gonna be writing like, super “passionate” shit ig, cuz intimacy doesn’t *need* to be inherently sexual! I wish people could understand that 😭 you can still make out with som1 and do ‘other stuff’ ig without touching them “inappropriately” 💀 (like, what I mean by other stuff is, idfk, things like biting and pinning. Doesn’t *have* to be a sexual thing.)
And for me personally, I really dislike when I’m trying to read a fic, it ends up being super well written, then it ends up being super smutty 😭 like it js ‘corrupts’ my image of the characters for some reason, like I don’t wanna look at characters I consider minors (or even characters I like period tbh) and be reminded abt sexual shit someone wrote abt them — it js weirds me out and makes me feel second hand embarrassment cuz like ew 🫤
And this is off topic technically, but worst of all, every time there’s smut that’s in a fic that had been good up to that point, they always give the characters weird ass kinks like wtf 😭 I don’t understand why people are so freaky LMAO - also don’t get me wrong, though. Idgaf what anyone is writing, I get the “if you don’t like it then don’t read it” thing cuz like, duh why would I complain abt something that I don’t even have to read. Other people can do wtv they want idc it’s not my business and doesn’t affect me 😭-I’m js saying in general it’s js my opinion. Just realized that I’m also kinda rambling my thoughts rn tbh ill stop now 💔

That might js be me, and I might js be rambling, but idgaf it’s js my opinion 💔 idk if it’s controversial or not, but like generally anyone can agree that smut of literal minors shouldn’t be normalized right??

All of that is besides the point though, I have more important things to talk abt

Ok so **SUPER IMPORTANT** I’m gonna post the next chapter TODAYYYYY cuz I’m super busy tomorrow and probably won’t have the time. I’m going to see the Minecraft movie LMAOOO 😭🤚 and js am gonna be busy all day tomorrow. Ik that’s really random but I might as well just say that. I’m actually so excited though idgaf what anyone says, it looks like it’s gonna be so horrible that it’ll end up being good 😭💀

Basically to sum everything up, gonna get to work on posting the next chapter now—

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 42: Back to the Old House

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi sat stiffly, her hands pressed neatly into her lap, her frame rigid with forced composure.

 

She didn’t move, didn’t glance around, didn’t even breathe too heavily.

 

Her eyes were locked ahead, her expression carefully blank, forcing herself into a stillness so convincing that, if anyone had walked in just then, they would’ve assumed she hadn’t moved an inch since the moment she’d been shoved in here.

 

But despite her practiced calm, she could still feel the faint tremor in her hands—the residual adrenaline from what they had just done still pulsing through her frame.

 

She could feel the lingering warmth on her lips—the ghost of his mouth still imprinted on hers.

 

She fought the overwhelming urge to press her fingers against her lips, to wipe the sensation away—or maybe to savor it—she wasn’t sure which.

 

But she kept her hands firmly in her lap, clenching them faintly together to keep herself still.

 

Out of the corner of her eye, she glanced at N.

 

For a brief, fleeting moment, she almost worried he would give them away somehow—fidget, flinch, or even look at her.

 

But to her relief, he sat completely still.

 

He had the same idea.

 

His frame was just as stiff, his posture tense but carefully neutral.

 

His hands were in his lap, mirroring her own, and he stared vaguely ahead with a blank, composed expression, as if he were doing his absolute best to feign casual boredom.

 

Good.

 

If anyone walked in, they wouldn’t suspect a thing.

 

And then—the door creaked open.

 

The dim light from the hallway spilled into the cramped closet, flooding over both of them in a blinding streak of relief and dread.

 

Uzi’s breath caught faintly, her hands twitching slightly, but she stayed still.

 

The first thing she saw was Lizzy.

 

The girl stood in the doorway, her smug, self-satisfied grin practically beaming with anticipation.

 

But as soon as she took in the scene before her, her expression immediately dropped. Her shoulders slumped slightly, her grin vanishing into a disappointed frown.

 

Boo,” she deadpanned, her voice flat with exaggerated dismay. “You guys are boring.”

 

Her tone was laced with playful mockery, but the genuine disappointment was clear in her voice.

 

Uzi didn’t need to read Lizzy’s expression to know exactly what she was expecting.

 

She wanted to catch us.

 

She wanted to walk in on something she could gossip about later—something scandalous, something to tease them over.

 

She was expecting to find us kissing.

 

Uzi could practically see it written all over Lizzy’s face—the unmistakable flicker of frustration, as if she’d just been robbed of the perfect opportunity for new drama material.

 

But instead, she was left with nothing.


Just two drones, sitting stiffly apart like they hadn’t spoken a word to each other.

 

Uzi’s fingers tightened faintly in her lap, fighting the urge to glance at N. Her chest heaved softly with a quiet, imperceptible breath.

 

Thank robo-god.

 

Her limbs were still shaky with adrenaline, but she slowly exhaled through her nose, forcing her expression into something calm, almost vaguely annoyed. She played it off, masking the heavy relief surging through her circuits.

 

With a subtle roll of her eyes, she exhaled sharply, somewhat leaning forward as she threw her hands against her knees with exaggerated impatience. “Finally,” she huffed, her voice flat and disinterested, dripping with feigned exasperation.

 

Without sparing Lizzy—or anyone else—a glance, she pushed herself off the suitcase and swiftly made her way through the door. Her movements were curt and sharp, deliberate but not rushed. She shoved past Lizzy with a firm but controlled push, attempting to move through the crowd without hesitation.

 

And she didn’t look back.

 

She didn’t dare look back.

 

Not at the closet, not at the crowd, and especially not at N.

 

Her hands curled faintly into her sleeves as she walked, knuckles stiff from how tightly she clenched them. Her face was warm—too warm—and she knew it had nothing to do with the stuffy closet. Her chest still felt heavy, her circuits still buzzing faintly with an unfocused, disoriented heat… and her lips still tingled with the ghost of a sensation she couldn’t get rid of.

 

And she hated it.

 

Not the kiss itself.

 

No.

 

But the fact that she still felt it.

 

And that realization made her stomach twist.

 

Uzi had barely taken a few steps out of the closet, when she was suddenly met with a swarm of drones. They closed in around her almost instantly, blocking any easy escape route. Their voices were loud, overlapping, and teasing, filling the hallway with a cacophony of excited snickering and playful jeers. Eyes gleaming with mischief, their faces were alight with wide, amused smirks—far too entertained by the situation.

 

Uzi’s fists tightened faintly at her sides.

 

Her circuits were already frayed, her mind still reeling from the kiss, and now she had to deal with this.

 

Lizzy, of course, was at the front of the group.

 

She sidled up next to Uzi with a smug grin and gave her a playful nudge with her elbow, her expression brimming with expectation.


“So?” Lizzy drawled, her voice lilting with suggestive curiosity.

 

Her tone was casual, but Uzi could hear the unmistakable implication behind it—the barely contained giddiness in her voice, as if she were on the verge of giggling just thinking about what might have happened.

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed sharply, her patience already thin.

 

Her gaze snapped toward Lizzy with an unamused glare, her expression hardening into a flat, pointed stare.

 

“So what?” she shot back, her words clipped, and her tone laced with unmasked irritation.

 

She kept her expression deliberately unreadable—calm and disinterested, as if the entire situation was beneath her attention. But Lizzy was undeterred—if anything, her grin only widened.

 

She let out a mischievous giggle, her eyes glimmering with faux innocence, leaning in slightly as her voice dropped into a conspiratorial murmur. “Did you guys… do anything in there?” Lizzy asked teasingly, her voice slow and deliberately suggestive.

 

The emphasis she placed on the word anything made Uzi’s circuits tighten with barely restrained annoyance. Her hands curled into loose fists at her sides, her grip tightening slightly.

 

Of course she was asking that.

 

Uzi felt her frame stiffen, her shoulders squaring as she exhaled sharply through her nose. She had no interest in entertaining Lizzy’s questions.

 

None.

 

Of course not,” she snapped, her tone exasperated, her words carrying a faint edge of disdain. She forced her voice to remain steady, leveling Lizzy with a glare. She made no effort to hide her irritation—Uzi wanted to let her know she was pissing her off.

 

But still—despite the clear hostility in her voice—Lizzy’s expression didn’t falter. She didn’t look the least bit convinced. Her smirk remained intact, unfazed by Uzi’s sharp tone, as if she saw right through it.

 

Though, Uzi wasn’t even technically lying.

 

Not really.

 

Lizzy was clearly implying something far more nefarious, than what had actually happened in the closet.

 

Her teasing tone and mischievous smirk made it painfully obvious that she was hinting at something more, something salacious.

 

Still, in a way, Uzi was telling the truth, because nothing that bad took place.

 

Because what had happened wasn’t that bad.

 

…Right?

 

The voices around her faded into the background as her thoughts clouded over with a sudden, suffocating weight. Her chest tightened faintly, her mind suddenly replaying what had just happened in vivid detail.

 

The feeling of his lips against hers.

 

The warmth of his hand cupping her face.

 


His ragged breaths against her mouth. 

 

The way she had instinctively melted into the kiss.

 

The way she didn’t pull away.

 

The memories surged back in sharp, visceral flashes, making her throat constrict slightly. Her limbs suddenly felt heavy—her legs stiff and unsteady, like they were too aware of his presence beside her.  Her face still felt warm—too warm—and she couldn’t shake the lingering tingle on her lips. Her stomach twisted, her frame coiling with uncertainty.

 

Why did she do that?

 

What had come over her?

 

The impulsiveness of it all—the heat, the sudden, reckless surrender—it wasn’t like her. And the worst part was—she didn’t even know how she felt about it.

 

Was it wrong?

 

Was she stupid for doing it?

 

She didn’t know.

 

She didn’t know.

 

And the more she thought about it, the more she realized—what she was feeling right now… wasn’t embarrassment.

 

It wasn’t guilt.

 

It was something else.

 

Something heavier.

 

Something messier.

 

And it terrified her.

 

Because she couldn’t deny the truth.

 

No matter how much she wanted to.

 

No matter how much she tried to convince herself otherwise.

 

She had wanted it.

 

She had wanted him.

 

And she still did.

 

And that realization hit her like a gut-punch.

 

Because she didn’t even know what that meant.

 

Did she even like N like that? Was it just some fleeting, impulsive mistake? Or was it more?

 

What did this even make them?

 

Her head suddenly felt too heavy, her thoughts weighing it down. Her chest ached with the unfamiliar weight of it all.  And despite herself, she felt a small, nagging voice in the back of her mind—a quiet, conflicted whisper she didn’t want to listen to.

 

You liked it.

 

She suppresses the thought—though she knew it was the undeniable, gnawing truth. Her throat tighten and her hands clench slightly at her sides. She kept walking, her face hard and unreadable, forcing her expression into one of impassive irritation.

 

But beneath the surface—she was anything but calm.

 

When she entered the living room, Uzi made her way behind the couch, and leaned against it. She let out a sigh as eyes drifted lazily across the room, scanning the sea of drones as they began filtering into it once more. Her gaze flickered disinterestedly from one familiar face to the next, barely registering the faces of the partygoers—until her eyes suddenly landed on him.

 

N.

 

He had entered at some point, and was now standing near the far side of the room, slightly separated from the crowd, talking to V and J.

 

Uzi’s entire frame stiffened faintly, her circuits locking up as a surge of panic shot through her. Her eyes narrowed slightly, honing in on him with sharp, suspicious precision.

 

Her chest tightened subtly.

 

Was he—?

 

No, he couldn’t be. 

 

What if he was telling them?

 

Her mind raced with the intrusive thought, the very notion making her insides twist unpleasantly. She could already picture it—N casually dropping some offhand comment, blurting out what had happened without even realizing the weight of his words. Her stomach knotted at the mental image of V and J’s faces—V’s eyes narrowing with devilish glee, her lips pulling into a taunting smirk, while J’s sharp, mocking snicker cut through the room like a blade. Her fists clenched subtly at the thought, her fingers faintly pressing into the fabric of her pants.

 

She couldn’t do anything about it either.

 

What was she gonna do—march over there and tell him to shut up?

 

That would only make it obvious.

 

Her teeth pressed faintly into her bottom lip, a faint prickle of heat sparking beneath her frame. Though, as she stared, her eyes lingering on the three of them, she gradually noticed something that made the sharp pang of panic in her chest falter slightly.

 

N wasn’t acting any differently.

 

In fact, he looked perfectly normal.

 

He stood with a casual slouch, his hands tucked loosely in his pockets, his posture completely relaxed. His expression was calm, his eyes bright and easygoing as he spoke to V and J without the slightest trace of awkwardness or hesitation.

 

He didn’t look remotely flustered or uneasy.

 

No downcast glances.

 

No nervous fidgeting.

 

No subtle hints of embarrassment or lingering tension in his voice or body language.

 

If anything, he seemed… fine.

 

Completely at ease.

 

In fact, V let out a sudden burst of laughter, tossing her head back with a wide, playful grin at something he had just said. Her shoulder bumped into his as she leaned toward him slightly, giggling under her breath.

 

Then, with her usual teasing boldness, she shoved him lightly in the chest, giving him a playful push that made him stumble half a step back. But N only let out an easygoing chuckle, flashing a goofy grin as he let himself be shoved, as if he didn’t have a care in the world.

 

And just like that, Uzi felt the tension in her chest slowly begin to unravel. Her shoulders, which had been subtly rigid with tension, loosened slightly. Her fingers relaxed, and she released her grip of the fabric of her pants.

 

Maybe… he wasn’t telling them after all.

 

The realization made her chest ease more, her core releasing some of the pressure it had been holding.

 

Of course he wasn’t telling them.

 

Why would he?

 

He wasn’t a complete idiot.

 

The relief was faint but palpable, gently loosening the knot in her stomach. But even as her circuits slowly unwound, a lingering trace of wariness still tugged faintly at the edge of her mind—a stubborn, lingering prickle of uncertainty that she just couldn’t quite shake. She kept her eyes on him a moment longer, her gaze narrowed slightly, still watching him carefully from her spot against the couch.

 

Just… to be sure.

 

Just as Uzi’s gaze subtly lingered on N for a moment longer, she suddenly caught sight of movement from the corner of her eye. Her focus flickered over toward Lizzy, who had rejoined the crowd, her eyes bright with mischievous delight.

 

A wide, giddy smile stretched across her face, and in her hand, she held yet another bottle, clutching it with the same wicked enthusiasm she’d had before.

 

Uzi’s chest sank.

 

Oh, great.

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly in disbelief.

 

They were seriously going to play again?

 

Of course they were—clearly, two rounds of social torture wasn’t enough.

 

No, apparently everyone at this party was having the time of their lives—so much fun, in fact, that they weren’t even considering putting a stop to this awful game.

 

Her lips pulled into a scowl, and she let out a low, irritated huff under her breath. She didn’t stick around to watch the crowd gather for round two. With an exasperated groan, she stopped leaning against the couch and took a step forward.

 

She was vaguely relieved when no one called out to her or asked where she was going. Not that she thought anyone would— but still. She didn’t want to draw attention to herself—didn’t want to have to deal with anyone right now.

 

She just needed a second to breathe—to think—somewhere away from the suffocating press of the party.

 

Without giving it a second thought, she turned toward the kitchen, slipping through the doorway directly behind the couch. As she crossed the threshold, the noise of the party dulled faintly behind her, creating a small but noticeable buffer from the chaos. Her eyes swept the room absently, taking in the space.

 

The kitchen was fairly large—typical of houses meant for entertaining. Warm, ambient lighting illuminated the sleek countertops and tiled backsplash. The appliances were modern, their metal finishes sleek and reflective, gleaming slightly beneath the overhead lights. There was a large island in the center of the room, its dark granite surface almost entirely covered with party supplies. Assorted food platters were scattered across it—half-empty bowls of chips, grease-stained pizza boxes, and a few trays of questionably room-temperature appetizers. Crumpled napkins and discarded plates were strewn lazily along the edges. There were drinks, too—a colorful assortment of bottles, solo cups, and a few half-drank sodas lined haphazardly across the surface, some tipped slightly at odd angles. The faint scent of artificially sweet punch, stale pizza grease, and something vaguely fruity lingered faintly in the air.

 

Her eyes flicked over to a single stool, pushed up against the far end of the island. It sat unoccupied, slightly crooked, as if the last drone to sit there had left in a hurry.

 

Without hesitation, Uzi made her way over to it, eager to put some distance between herself and the rest of the party. She dropped down onto the stool, slouching slightly forward as she sat. With a long, exhausted sigh, she leaned forward, resting her arms on the edge of the island.

 

Her shoulders sagged slightly, and she let her frame relax against the cool granite surface, feeling the tension in her body slowly melt into it.

 

Her fingers instinctively reached into her pocket, pulling out her phone. Without much thought, she unlocked it, her thumb flicking over to her music app.

 

Maybe music would help.

 

She needed something to drown out the noise still faintly buzzing from the other room. But more than that, she needed a distraction—anything to occupy her mind and keep her from spiraling into the tangled mess of thoughts still lingering at the forefront of her mind. Her eyes locked onto the screen for a moment, unfocused, her mind still far too cloudy to even register what playlist she was about to pick.

 

Her thoughts were still too tangled—too raw.

 

Even here, tucked away from the chaos of the party, she could still feel the faint, lingering heat on her face.

 

Her lips still tingled faintly from where N’s had been pressed against them.

 

And no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t push the feeling away.

 

Uzi’s fingers brushed absently over the surface of her phone, her eyes barely registering the screen as she scrolled through her playlist. With a slow, deliberate motion, she reached into her jacket pocket, fishing out her old, slightly tangled wire headphones. Her hands were still a little shaky—whether from leftover adrenaline or exhaustion, she wasn’t sure. She worked the knot loose with her thumb, straightening the cord with a tired flick of her wrist. Without much thought, she plugged the headphones into her phone, then brought them up to her ears, sliding the cool, familiar buds into place.

 

There was a brief moment of quiet static as the connection settled.

 

Then, with a muted tap, she pressed shuffle.

 

A low hum of music poured into her ears, the familiar melody instantly creating a thin but noticeable barrier between her and the outside world.

 

The faint thrum of the party dulled even further, becoming nothing more than a muffled drone somewhere far in the distance. She clicked the volume button up on her phone a few times for good measure—wanting to completely distract herself from the party, from her thoughts,  if only for a moment.

 

Her shoulders relaxed, the tension she hadn’t even realized she was still holding slowly bleeding from her frame. Her eyes flicked tiredly toward the cool, stone countertop beneath her arms. She stared at it for a moment, then slowly let her body slouch forward, lowering herself slightly.

 

Her arms folded on the counter, creating a makeshift pillow. Without much hesitation, she rested her head against them, pressing her cheek into the smooth granite surface.  The coolness of the stone instantly soothed the lingering warmth still clinging faintly to her skin, offering a brief but much-needed relief. She let out a slow, heavy sigh, her breath fanning softly over her sleeve.

 

The rhythmic thump of the bass in her headphones filled her ears, the sound gently pulsing through her skull like a steady heartbeat. The weight of exhaustion gradually pulled at her limbs, making her body feel heavier—so heavy. The longer she laid there, the more she felt herself slipping, her mind slowly unraveling at the edges.

 

Her eyes grew heavy, her lids drooping slightly with each slow blink. The world around her began to blur, the sounds dulling into a low, steady hum.

 

The faint throb still lingering in her chest began to ease—fading into the background with the music.

 

And with one last, weary exhale, she let her eyes close, allowing herself to drift into a light, hazy sleep.

Notes:

Yuhhh 2 chapters in a day

Their won’t be one tomorrow though since I’m basically posting it early ig

Ofc Uzi would be someone that would take a nap at a house party, of all places 😭💔

I think she js *really* needed a distraction cuz she’s absolute shit at processing her feelings

Oh also hopefully you noticed, but I put a link to the song she was listening to during the part when she put it on 🥹

U could listen to it with her ig, I’ve mentioned it before but I love immersive story telling, I js haven’t had another chance to add a song until now, if that makes sense. Did the same thing in one of the wayyyy earlier chapters

Ofc Uzi listens to the smiths 😭🤚 I don’t think she’d be a *huge* fan tbh, but like she def knows her music. She js put shuffle on her playlist and that was the first song that played, I thought it fit that specific scene.

Also that’s why the chapter is named that, incase u didn’t know the song and u were confused 💔

Also really random, but when I had initially wrote this chapter I was like, on the verge of major writers block, so it really sucked at first (in my opinion) so I js finished heavily editing it for like an hour 😭

I still kinda don’t like the way it’s written, but I think it’s good enough now to be posted. Tell me if you have any critiques though cuz like I might go back and fix anything if it was too bad or poorly explained/worded 💔

SOME CLARIFICATIONS:

- Earlier in this chapter, when Uzi responded to Lizzy saying ‘of course,’ I def could’ve added a response that Lizzy would have said, but didn’t. Uzi got really lost in thought, but I didn’t clarify that she just kind of ignored whatever Lizzy was going to say and walked away.

- When I said Uzi leaned against the couch, she was like, basically sitting on the back of it turned away from it (does that make sense?) she was just leaning against it, and right behind the couch is the doorway to the kitchen. I hope that makes sense

Idk if anyone even thought abt either if those things, I’m probably js overthinking, but might as well say something yk 😭

Next chapter will be released Sunday (central time)!! Stay tuned :3

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 43: Concise

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi stirred faintly at the sensation of a gentle tap on her shoulder.

 

For a brief moment, she barely registered it, her mind still heavy with sleep. Her eyes remained closed, reluctant to let go of the haze of rest she had just barely slipped into.

 

The tap came again—a little more insistent this time, but still careful. With a slow, lethargic breath, she finally peeled her eyes open, blinking sluggishly.

 

Her vision was slightly blurry with sleep at first, but as she lazily glanced up, her gaze landed on the figure in front of her.

 

N.

 

Her heart gave an involuntary skip, but she quickly suppressed it, forcing her sluggish mind to catch up. For the briefest moment, she almost forgot where she was—her groggy mind clouding over the memories of the party, the closet, the kiss.

 

But the second her eyes met his, the haze instantly evaporated.

 

Her chest tightened as her mind slammed back to the present, all the prior events rushing to the forefront. Her body stiffened, but only for half a second—a barely perceptible hitch in her posture.

 

She quickly sat up, pulling herself from the counter with a casual stretch, feigning nonchalance. Her movements were slightly stiff, though, and she could feel her pulse picking up—a little faster than it should have been. Still, she forced herself to maintain her composure, giving her shoulders a lazy roll, as if she had simply been roused from a deep, undisturbed nap.

 

When she finally spoke, her voice came out smooth, albeit slightly raspy with sleep.

 

“Yeah?” she muttered, drawing out the word slightly, as though she was only mildly inconvenienced by being woken up.

 

Her tone was deliberately casual, bordering on disinterested, but she could feel the faintest crack of tension behind it.

 

N smiled faintly when she looked at him—his lips quirking into a soft, slightly sheepish grin.

 

The corners of his eyes softened, the hazy warmth in his gaze making her stomach do a barely noticeable flip.

 

Damn it.

 

She tried—tried—to ignore the flutter she felt, pushing it down as quickly as it surfaced.

 

He rubbed the back of his neck with one hand, his voice light but a little unsure. “Hey,” he murmured softly, his eyes flicking to hers before glancing away briefly, as if testing the waters. “Just… wanted to see what you were doing.”

 

His tone was easygoing—simple, almost playful—but his smile was still a little unsure, like he wasn’t certain if she was going to be annoyed with him.

 

Uzi, despite herself, rolled her eyes. She exhaled sharply through her nose, making a show of her exasperation.

 

A dry smirk tugged at her lips, masking the slightly conflicted thrum in her chest.

 

“Well, obviously taking a nap,” she muttered, her voice laced with deliberate sarcasm, though she was careful not to let it sound too harsh. She turned her eyes back to him with a slightly deadpan stare, as if daring him to state the obvious again.

 

But despite her mock annoyance, she couldn’t bring herself to be actually mad at him—not really.

 

N blinked at her for a second, looking slightly puzzled, as though he wasn’t sure whether she was genuinely irritated or just messing with him.

 

His expression turned a little sheepish again, and he opened his mouth slightly as if to say something, but before he could, Uzi beat him to it.

 

She raised an eyebrow and tilted her head, her tone still feigning dry indifference. “What time is it?” she asked, trying to keep her voice level.

 

N blinked again, momentarily thrown off by the question. After a brief pause, he slipped his hand into his pocket, pulling out his phone.

 

The faint glow of the screen illuminated his face, casting a soft light against his features. He squinted slightly at the screen, then glanced back at her, his voice casual but slightly warm.

 

“Uh… 9:32,” he murmured, flicking his eyes back up to hers.

 

His tone was even, but the way his gaze lingered on her was almost hesitant—like he was trying to read her expression, unsure of where they stood after everything.

 

Uzi’s gaze lingered on N for a moment longer, her eyes narrowing slightly as she studied him. At first glance, he didn’t seem nervous—not in the usual, obvious way, at least. His posture was relaxed enough, his expression still carrying that soft, uncertain smile.

 

But the more she looked, the more she noticed the subtle signs beneath the surface—the tiny cracks in his composure.

 

His voice had been just a little bit off when he spoke—a faint unsteadiness clinging to his words, as though he was having to deliberately focus on them.

 

And then, her eyes caught the way his hands were faintly trembling at his sides. It was subtle—barely noticeable—but it was there.

 

Her eyes traced upward, landing on the lingering red haze in his eyes.

 

Oh.

 

Her stomach sank faintly as the realization hit her.

 

He was still high.

 

Of course he was.

 

She internally cursed, remembering just how much of that brownie he had eaten. He had practically devoured the whole thing without the slightest clue of what was in it.

 

Uzi felt an irritated flare in her chest, frustration bubbling up. She clenched her jaw slightly, her teeth grinding faintly against each other.

 

That stupid idiot Sam.

 

Why wouldn’t he tell N they weren’t just regular brownies?

 

The thought made her scowl slightly.

 

But as her thoughts lingered, the heat of her anger slowly cooled, replaced by something else—a reluctant realization.

 

Her expression softened slightly as she exhaled sharply through her nose.

 

No… Sam probably hadn’t even thought twice about it.

 

It was common sense, wasn’t it? Brownies at a high school party—of course they weren’t normal.

 

Sam had likely just assumed that N knew what he was getting into, not realizing how oblivious he actually was.

 

Uzi’s anger faded further, giving way to something far less sharp—pity.

 

A small twinge of sympathy pulled at her chest as she glanced at him again.

 

He was still blinking at her, that slightly unsure smile lingering on his face, but the faint haze in his eyes made him look so… unguarded.

 

So helplessly, frustratingly innocent.

 

And for whatever reason, that made her stomach twist.

 

He was barely even aware of what was happening to him, probably just trying his best to keep it together.. The sight of him like this—cluelessly caught in the effects of something he hadn’t meant to consume—made her heart ache just a little.

 

Without really thinking, she exhaled softly through her nose and spoke, her voice casual but slightly quiet. “Yeah… I’m probably gonna head home soon,” she murmured. Her tone was light, almost offhand, as though she was simply making an idle observation.

 

But there was a gentle edge of tiredness in her voice—the kind that came not just from physical exhaustion, but from a long, draining night.

 

She didn’t miss the faint flicker in N’s expression at her words—his eyes briefly lowering, the corners of his mouth tugging ever so slightly downward.

 

But before either of them could say anything else, Uzi let out a quiet breath and turned away.

 

She rested her head back down against the counter, the coolness of the granite pressing against her cheek.

 

Her eyes slid shut, savoring the contrast of the cold surface against her warm skin.

 

It wasn’t that she was trying to ignore N—not at all.

 

She was just… tired.

 

The weight of the evening was finally settling into her limbs—a slow, heavy fatigue pulling at her.

 

Her arms folded loosely beneath her head, and she exhaled softly, letting herself sink into the stillness for a moment.

 

She wasn’t drifting off—just resting.

 

But even as her eyes remained shut, her mind refused to quiet completely.

 

Her thoughts still drifted toward N—toward his trembling hands, his slightly off-kilter voice, and that dazed look in his eyes.

 

And as much as she wanted to sink into the brief stillness, she couldn’t entirely shake the faint pull of concern gnawing at her chest.

 

N’s voice pulled Uzi from the haze of her thoughts, his soft tone breaking the faint stillness that had settled between them.

 

“Yeah… I probably will too,” he murmured. There was an offhand casualness to his voice—a sleepy, slightly sluggish warmth.

 

“Besides,” he added lightly, “a few drones have already started leaving anyway.” The words were so unremarkable in themselves—a simple, matter-of-fact observation.

 

But something about the way he said them made Uzi’s stomach twist slightly. It was the easy, throwaway tone he used—so casual, so oblivious.

 

She felt a prickle of unease skitter down her spine. For a fleeting moment, she considered just brushing it off—but then, her brows knit together faintly as the weight of his words finally settled in her mind.

 

Wait.

 

If he was planning on heading home…

 

How the hell was he going to get there?

 

Her eyes snapped open, and she slowly lifted her head from the counter, glancing at him. Her gaze drifted over him carefully—his faintly relaxed expression, the sleepy edge in his eyes, the slight sluggishness in his movements.

 

He was still high.

 

There was no way he could drive himself home.

 

Her stomach tightened at the thought.

 

Before she could think better of it, the words slipped from her lips.

 

“How are you gonna drive yourself home?” she asked, her voice slow, slightly disbelieving.

 

She didn’t bother trying to mask the flatness in her tone—the faint edge of exasperation slipping through.

 

At the sound of her voice, N’s eyes flickered toward her, and to her faint disbelief, a slow smile began spreading across his face. The corners of his mouth curled upward into a small, relaxed grin—a genuine, almost amused expression, as though she had just said something mildly funny.

 

Then, with an almost drowsy nonchalance, he responded.

 

“…With my car,” he said plainly, the words lilting slightly as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

 

Uzi blinked once.

 

For a moment, she simply stared at him, completely dumbfounded.

 

He wasn’t joking.

 

He actually thought she was joking.

 

She slowly closed her eyes for half a second, exhaling sharply through her nose as she tried to fight back the flare of irritation rising in her chest. With a low groan, she ran a hand slowly down her face, dragging her palm over her eyes and letting her fingers briefly pinch the bridge of her nose. She sighed, before she opened her eyes again, turning to face him directly.

 

Her gaze was flat but firm as she gave him a look—a deadpan, unimpressed stare that she hoped would at least make him think for half a second.

 

“N,” she said, her voice sharp but low with controlled exasperation, “you’re still high.” Her eyes narrowed, her tone flat but insistent. “There is no way you’re driving yourself home right now.”

 

Her words were pointed—calm but deliberate—each one slightly clipped as she fought to keep her annoyance in check. She stared at him, waiting for the reality of her words to sink in.

 

But to her dismay, the faint, sleepy smile remained on his face—completely unfazed.  The obliviousness in his eyes made her want to slam her head against the counter. For a brief moment, N simply stared at her, blinking slowly.

 

Then, like a switch had been flipped, a slow wave of realization washed over his face.

 

His eyes widened slightly, and his mouth parted faintly as the truth finally dawned on him.

 

“Ohhh…” he mumbled, drawing out the word slightly, as though he had just remembered something he had carelessly forgotten. There was no alarm in his voice—just mild, sluggish surprise, as if she had reminded him that he left his keys on the counter.

 

He stared at her for a beat longer, his head tilting slightly to the side, before his expression grew mildly thoughtful.

 

Then, with a slight shrug, he spoke again. “So… what should I do then?” he asked simply, his voice still carrying that same faint, drowsy innocence. The words were casual—almost childlike in their simplicity.

 

There was no trace of concern or urgency in his tone—just the gentle, earnest cadence of someone who genuinely didn’t know what to do next.

 

Uzi stared at him for a moment, the corners of her lips pressing into a thin line.

 

What should he do?

 

Her mind whirred faintly, sorting through the possible options. The most obvious solution would be for him to just stay at Lizzy’s house until his high wore off.

 

But…

 

Her brows knit faintly.

 

Who knows how long that would take?

 

Besides, he would probably be better off sleeping it off somewhere comfortable instead of sitting around, half-dazed at some party.

 

And more importantly…

 

Her gaze lowered slightly, eyes narrowing faintly in thought.

 

Would Lizzy even let him sleep at her house?

 

Her stomach twisted faintly at the consideration.

 

For a brief moment, her mind flickered back to earlier in the night.

 

Lizzy.

 

Uzi’s lips pressed into a thin, displeased line. She recalled, with perfect clarity, the way Lizzy had been flirting with N—her oil simmered at the memory. N had been sober then—completely clear-minded.

 

And still, he hadn’t flirted back.

 

In fact, he hadn’t even seemed to realize that Lizzy was flirting with him.

 

Her stomach knotted at the thought.

 

She could still hear Lizzy’s voice, lilting with playful suggestion—the teasing glimmer in her eyes. And then, like a splinter slipping beneath her plating, she remembered the comment Lizzy had made.

 

The offhand, seemingly innocuous question.

 

She had asked N if he could stay over after everyone left.

 

Uzi’s fingers curled against the edge of the counter—and jaw clenched, teeth grinding together ever so slightly. The tight, complicated feeling in her chest coiled like a spring—hot, sharp, and suffocating.

 

Wait— was she… jealous?

 

Her throat tightened faintly at the thought, and her face prickled with heat. 

No.

 

No.

 

She shoved the notion down—deep, where she couldn’t acknowledge it. She would not admit that to herself.

 

She was just… looking out for him.

 

Right?

 

Her fists clenched faintly against the counter, her knuckles stiffening slightly.

 

Her jaw set.

 

Because now, with that memory fresh in her mind, she realized something else.

 

Lizzy had clearly been implying something bad.

 

Something N—oblivious and trusting as he was—wouldn’t even realize was happening.

 

Her oil flashed hot in her circuits, and a sharp, protective edge sliced through her chest.

 

What if Lizzy tried to take advantage of him?

 

The thought alone made her enraged.

 

Her fingers twitched slightly against the granite.

 

There was no way in hell she was suggesting he stay at Lizzy’s house.

 

Uzi exhaled slowly through her nose, willing herself to keep her expression neutral. Her eyes remained fixed on the counter, but her mind churned.

 

What else could he do?

 

She had no answer—not yet.

 

But there was no way she was leaving him to the mercy of Lizzy’s “hospitality.”

 

Out of nowhere, a thought struck her suddenly—flickering into her mind with sharp, spontaneous clarity.

 

What if… he came home with her?

 

For a brief moment, she blinked, the thought lingering, hovering uncertainly.

 

Could he?

 

Her mind raced through the logistics.

 

She didn’t have a car—she rode the bus.

 

Her eyes somewhat narrowed in thought.

 

That was probably the best option for him anyway.

 

Letting N be driven somewhere by someone else—somewhere safe—was infinitely better than risking him trying to drive himself home. And also, he could ride the bus back tomorrow to pick up his car. That would work perfectly, wouldn’t it?

 

Her fingers relaxed faintly against the counter.

 

It was practical.

 

Reasonable.

 

And—most importantly—it was safe.

 

But as the idea settled in her mind, she felt a faint, nervous pang press against her chest.

 

Would he think it was weird?

 

She frowned slightly, her brows knitting.

 

Her stomach knotted faintly at the memory of Lizzy’s earlier, shameless implications—the suggestive look in her eyes.

 

Just the thought of it pissed her off. Yet, her expression hardened slightly, shaking the thought away.

 

But I’m not like that.

 

The very idea of bringing N to her house made her feel vaguely nauseous.

 

She hated the implication—despised it, even. But what other option did she have? Leave N at Lizzy’s house and hope she wouldn’t take advantage of him? No way, she didn’t even want to chance it.

 

Besides, there was nothing remotely weird or inappropriate about what she was thinking about suggesting—she had no ill intentions whatsoever. When she got home, she could easily just tell N to sleep on the couch or something.

 

Simple.

 

Her dad wouldn’t care—he probably wouldn’t even blink.

 

She had guy friends before, and she’s had sleepovers with them, too—on the couch, with no questions asked.

 

Her mind flickered back briefly to a memory of a sleepover with Thad back in middle school. Her lips tugged faintly at the corners as the memory surfaced. It was nothing—just an innocent, fleeting recollection. But for a brief moment, it eased the tension in her chest. But before she could linger on the thought, a soft, hesitant voice cut through the faint haze of her thoughts.

 

“Uzi…?”

 

Her eyes lifted.

 

She turned slightly at the sound of her name, blinking as her gaze fell on N.

 

He was watching her, his eyes wide and expectant, his expression quietly inquisitive. His voice was still gentle, slightly dazed, but brimming with that same familiar softness.

 

The way he was looking at her—gentle, trusting, almost hopeful—sent a sharp flutter through her chest.

 

She swallowed faintly, ignoring the warmth prickling at the back of her neck.

 

Don’t be weird about this.

 

Forcing her voice to remain steady, she shifted slightly in her seat, aiming for a casual tone.

 

“Hey… um…” she began, glancing at him briefly before turning her eyes back to the counter, willing herself to sound as nonchalant as possible.

 

Her fingers tapped idly against the granite as she shrugged faintly.

 

“Why don’t you just… ride the bus with me?” she suggested, her voice light and even, as though she were mentioning it in passing.

 

She turned her gaze back toward him, her eyes carefully neutral.

 

“You can come back to my place and sleep off your high,” she added with a slight, deliberate indifference.

 

Her tone was even—casual.

 

As though she were suggesting nothing more significant than offering him a ride… which she was.

 

But internally, her circuits buzzed beneath her plating, heart thudding just a fraction faster than it should have been. For a brief moment, she braced herself—half-expecting him to ask why, or to hesitate, or even seem confused.

 

But instead—

 

To her mild surprise—

 

N’s face brightened.

 

The corners of his lips lifted into a soft, easy smile, his eyes blinking slowly, warmly.

 

Without missing a beat, he nodded slightly.

 

“Okay,” he answered simply, his voice still slow and gentle with residual drowsiness.

 

There was no hesitation.

 

No confusion.

 

Just a soft, effortless acceptance—genuine and without question.

 

He didn’t even seem to think twice about it.

 

His smile lingered, soft and content, as though she had just suggested something perfectly ordinary and familiar.

 

For a moment, Uzi simply stared at him.

 

Her eyes flickered, caught off guard by how easily he had agreed. She almost expected herself to feel flustered at his quick, unguarded acceptance—her stomach coiling with faint nervousness.

 

But instead, she felt a strange, unexplainable warmth settle faintly in her chest. His lack of hesitation—his quiet, easy trust—steadied something in her.

 

…And though she wouldn’t admit it, part of her was grateful for how effortlessly he had said yes.

 

N’s voice cut softly through the hum of her thoughts, pulling her eyes back toward him.

 

“Hey, um…” he murmured quietly, his voice still slow and hazy with lingering drowsiness. His eyes blinked softly, slightly heavy-lidded, but gentle as ever.  “When should we… you know—head out?” His voice was quiet, his words light, almost unsure, as if he wasn’t entirely certain he should be the one to ask. His head tilted slightly to the side, his eyes blinking slowly, expectantly.

 

Uzi stilled, her eyes lingering on his. She briefly glanced down at her phone screen, the time flashing faintly in the corner.

 

9:46 PM.

 

Her gaze flicked briefly toward the distant sounds of the party—the laughter, the music, the faint clatter of bottles.

 

Even without looking, she could tell the party was still going strong.

 

It was close to ten now—

 

Relatively late.

 

And if she knew anything about the kind of drones who threw parties like this, most of them would probably be staying until at least midnight—if not later.

 

Her eyes narrowed faintly in thought.

 

The thought of hanging around any longer, of enduring Lizzy’s teasing or Thad’s drunken nonsense, made her shoulders tense faintly—and she didn’t exactly feel like sticking around until the party became more so of a drunken disaster than it already was. She averted her gaze back to N.

 

Maybe they should just go now.

 

Her eyes lingered on him for a moment.

 

He was still watching her with soft, unfocused eyes—dazed but expectant, waiting patiently for her answer. Her chest gave a small, involuntary flutter at the quiet look of trust in his eyes. Her fingers drummed idly against the counter as she gave a slight shrug.

 

“Eh… what about now?” she suggested lightly, her voice deliberately casual, almost nonchalant. She cast him a brief glance, as if the suggestion was barely worth a second thought.

 

For a moment, she expected him to hesitate. Instead, though, N’s lips curved into a faint, lopsided smile. He gave a small, easy nod. “Sure,” he answered simply, his voice still warm and unguarded, carrying the same soft, agreeable gentleness it always did.

 

The simple, relaxed acceptance in his tone made something in her chest loosen faintly.

The corner of her mouth twitched slightly—just barely.

 

Without saying anything else, she slowly pushed herself up from her seat.

 

She stretched her arms above her head, her posture flexing as she arched slightly, her limbs stiff from sitting so long.

 

She inhaled softly, taking a slow, steady breath.

 

Guess this was really happening.

 

Her hands lowered, and she exhaled slowly. She began to walk forward silently. She cast him a glance over her shoulder, her voice quiet but firm.

 

“C’mon,” she muttered softly.

 

Her tone was brisk but steady, almost matter-of-fact, leaving no room for hesitation.

 

“Let’s go.”

 

Without waiting for a response, she turned back, her steps continuing to be slow but deliberate as she started toward the doorway.

Notes:

Ughhh I really don’t like this chapter

I think I mentioned previously but I was fighting writers block like real hard when I was writing this 😭 the next like, 1 and a half chapters are shitty too, but I promise it’ll get better!!!

Bear with me please 💔

There’s a pretty good chapter coming up soon (like, 2 chapters away? Idk I’d have to look) so I’m excited for that.

More on topic abt the actual chapter, I feel like Uzi is js like, a *major* problem solver. Like, even if it’s not her issue whatsoever, she’s gonna try to fix it because she feels like she has to. So, when she realized that N couldn’t exactly drive himself home (cuz imagine if he got in a horrible accident 💀) her solution was for him to go with her to her house 😭😭 and she’s not even trying to come onto him or anything, she’s genuinely tryna look out for him cuz she cares a lot abt him (even if she hates admitting it. She js hates “sappy” feelings overall 💔)

I thought it was funny though that she wasn’t js like “you could ride the bus with me and then go to your house” and instead immediately offered that he go with her 😭🤚

But at the same time, it’d make sense, cuz I’m gonna assume he doesn’t ride the bus that often, and probably would have no idea how to even get back to his house, even if he was sober

And speaking of that, ik it’s been a hot minute since he ate that brownie, but like I’m telling u edibles will fuck u up if there’s enough mg’s of weed in them so he’s probably gonna be stoned for a while 💔 I don’t think it was enough to make him green out though, it’s js hitting him kind of hard since this is literally his first trip 😭

OK I gotta go, I’m gonna js post 2 chapters tomorrow but like actually cuz I was busy again today, sorry 🥲

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 44: Rumination

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The night air was sharp against Uzi’s plating, the cold sinking into her limbs, leaving a faint, prickling numbness where it touched. A faint shiver ran through her frame, making her plating bristle slightly.  She exhaled softly, the chill clinging to her vents, making the breath feel heavier as it left her.

 

Her eyes drifted upward, her gaze idly tracing the sky.  The moon hung high and pale, its half-lit face casting a faint silver glow over the landscape. Stars were scattered faintly across the darkness, their light quiet and steady, indifferent to the world below.

 

The bus stop itself was still and quiet, except for the faint buzz of a nearby streetlamp hummed softly in the distance, barely cutting through the thick silence.

 

She sat on the cold metal bench, her arms tucked slightly around herself. Her joints tensed slightly against the chill, and after a moment, she gave a quiet sigh of resignation. Her hands fumbled at her waist, untying the jacket still knotted around her. The fabric was still faintly warm from being pressed against her frame.

 

She then slipped her arms into the sleeves, tugging it tightly around herself. As the warmth pressed  against her chest, dulling the cold ever so slightly. Her hands tugged the sleeves tighter around her wrists, before her eyes drifted idly to her side.

 

N sat quietly beside her, his seemingly relaxed, almost slouched against the bench. His hands were tucked loosely into his pockets, his elbows slack.

 

His shoulders were faintly hunched, and his eyes were cast slightly downward, blinking slowly, almost tiredly. The faint red haze still lingered in his irises, though softer now, his expression drowsy and unfocused.

 

He looked so casual, so untroubled—so entirely unaffected by everything that had happened.

 

Meanwhile, Uzi could feel her thoughts fraying faintly at the edges.

 

They sat in silence.

 

No words were exchanged—just the steady hum of the streetlamp and the occasional distant whistle of the wind.

 

Her eyes lowered faintly, her gaze falling toward the ground—but her thoughts didn’t stay there.

 

Her mind wandered.

 

Her thoughts drifted—backward.

 

Back to the party.

 

Her chest tightened at the memory.

 

She regretted going. At the thought, a thin prickle of annoyance tightening in her chest.

 

She should have never let Thad convince her—it was a stupid idea, and should have known better. She should have thought ahead, thought about the bad things that could and would happen rather than the good that might have happened, but didn't

 

And if she had just stayed home—

 

Her fingers tightened around the edges of her sleeves.

 

—then none of it would have happened.

 

But…

 

Her hands stilled, her breath catching in her throat.

 

But if she hadn’t gone…

 

Her eyes flickered briefly to her side.

 

Her gaze lingered on N’s profile—the faint tired slouch of his shoulders, the soft red haze still blurring the edges of his eyes.

 

—then none of it would have happened.

 

Her fingers curling subtly against the fabric of her jacket at the thought.

 

No.

 

She forcefully pushed the thought from her mind, wrenching it away, refusing to let herself linger on it.

 

Not now.

 

She didn’t want to think about that.

 

She couldn’t.

 

She couldn’t let herself make things weird.

 

Not here.

 

Not right now.

 

She turned her eyes deliberately forward, her gaze hardening faintly. But despite herself, her thoughts kept stirring, restless and unyielding. Uzi’s mind began to drift once more.

 

If she hadn’t gone, what would have happened then? Would she have just continued to ignore him at school without even realizing it? And when she would have eventually realized it, would that have made a difference? It wasn’t like there would be any other possibility that they were thrown in a closet or a room together and basically forced to talk or interact in some sort of way. And because of that, there never would have been any chance that they…

 

She suppressed the thought, internally changing the subject.

 

She still felt bad about ignoring him before the party, to be honest, especially after what N had said to her in the closet. If she hadn’t gone to the party, she never would’ve known. And if she hadn’t gone, she would’ve have realized that she was ignoring him… and never would’ve realized the full extent of why.

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly.

 

Then, her chest gave a subtle, involuntary shiver, but this time, it wasn’t from the cold.

 

Now that she’s thought about it… She still hadn’t fully processed any of it. Everything with N and V—the whole disassembly drone thing—The realization that she could be in danger if J ever found out that she knew.

 

The weight of it still clung faintly to her chest, heavy and unrelenting.

 

Her fingers flexed faintly against the fabric of her jacket.

 

She wasn’t ready for any of this.

 

She wasn’t ready for the danger—the uncertainty—the looming threat of what was to come.

 

And she sure as hell wasn’t ready for—

 

She caught herself taking a quick glance at N, her eyes lingering on him briefly.

 

She turned her eyes quickly forward again.

 

—for whatever the hell tonight had been. 

 

Her lips pressed into a faint, hard line as her arms pulled subtly tighter around herself.

 

She just wanted to go home.

 

The faint, low hum of an approaching engine cut softly through the stillness, pulling Uzi’s attention from her thoughts.

 

Her eyes flickered toward the road.

 

The bus rumbled toward the stop, its headlights cutting faint, flickering streaks of yellow light across the pavement. Its large, boxy frame slowed with a soft hiss of the brakes, and the door creaked open with a tired groan. Uzi gave a faint sigh, the breath catching slightly against the coolness of the night air.

 

Her eyes shifted toward N, who was still seated quietly beside her. She only held her gaze on him for a brief moment, then exhaled softly, nudging her head faintly toward the bus.

 

“Come on,” she muttered, her voice low and casual.

 

Her tone was neither cold nor distant—just soft, almost tired.

 

N blinked faintly, the haze in his eyes momentarily breaking as he registered her voice.

 

For a brief moment, his tired eyes met hers.

 

And then, without a word, he gave a faint nod and pushed himself to his feet.. The movement was slow, almost lazy—his limbs still slack from the lingering haze in his system.

 

Uzi stood as well, turning away without another glance. Her boots scuffed faintly against the pavement as she walked toward the bus, N following quietly behind her.

 

The bus door let out another faint creak as she stepped up, the interior lights casting a dim, artificial glow over the rows of seats.

 

Her eyes scanned the cabin as she made her way in.

Notes:

Js a short chapter abt her overthinking before getting on the bus

Her chronic overthinking is so funny to me😭🤚

Like, she’s js mentally dying and being dramatic asf while N is beside her chilling in his own world 💀

I feel bad for her but like at the same time, she’s kinda doing this to herself. It sucks cuz like, she needs someone to call her out, but how can she be called out if she doesn’t tell anyone abt her thoughts? 😭💔

Ok that’s pretty much all I have to say, see u in the next chapter :3

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 45: Indifference

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Most of the seats at the front of the bus were already occupied.

 

Uzi’s gaze briefly flickered over the drones closest to her—most of them adults. They sat slumped faintly against the windows or the backs of their seats, their eyes half-lidded and heavy with fatigue. Some stared blankly out the window, their gazes vacant and unfocused.

 

A few leaned faintly against the poles or rested their heads against their hands, looking thoroughly spent. They were probably just getting off late shifts—their frames slack with exhaustion, their limbs dull with the weight of the day.

 

Her eyes drifted briefly toward the side of the bus, where a few teenagers sat huddled together, talking softly.

 

They looked more awake—more lively.

 

One leaned casually against the window, a skateboard propped against their knee. Another sat sideways in their seat, their legs draped lazily over the side as they gestured animatedly mid-conversation. Their voices were soft, almost hushed, but occasionally punctuated with faint, breathy laughter.

 

Just some kids hanging out late.

 

Uzi’s gaze lingered only for a moment before shifting forward again. It didn’t matter. She wasn’t here to drone-watch, she needed to find a place to sit before the bus started moving again.

 

Her eyes scanned further back, quickly spotting a few empty seats near the rear, including a spot right next to the window. Perfect. Without a word, she began walking down the aisle, making her way toward them.

 

Her boots clunked faintly against the floor with each step, the sound dull and rhythmic against the quiet murmur of voices and the faint rumble of the bus engine.

 

She slipped into one of the empty seats, dropping down with a faint, tired sigh. The plastic of the seat felt cool against her, the material etched with lines and engravings form previous passengers. N slid into the seat beside her, quietly settling next to hers.

 

Uzi exhaled softly, her eyes lowering slightly. Her hands absently rested against her lap, her fingers loosely curled. She stared down at them for a brief moment, her eyes unfocused.

 

Finally.

 

For the first time all night, she felt a faint flicker of relief settle in her chest.

 

The noise of the party was gone—the buzz of voices, the music pounding faintly in her head—the constant, prickling awareness of the eyes on her. All of it was behind her now—just the low hum of the bus engine and the quiet murmur of voices remained.

 

She let her eyes drift slightly, turning faintly toward the window. The cool glass pressed against her cheek, faintly soothing any of the lingering heat still clinging to her frame. Her reflection stared faintly back at her, half-obscured by the dim, flickering streetlights outside.

 

Her eyes were tired, slightly heavy-lidded with fatigue, but beneath the dullness of her reflection, her thoughts continued to stir—relentless.

 

She still couldn’t fully process everything that had happened tonight.

 

Her chest tightened, and her fingers twitched slightly against her lap, her hands subtly curling into her sleeves.

 

Her eyes flickered briefly to her side.

 

N sat beside her, looking the same as he did when they were sitting outside. His posture was casual—his arms loose at his sides, his legs slightly apart, his shoulders slack. His head was faintly tilted, resting slightly against the back of the seat.

 

His eyes blinked slowly, heavily, the faint haze still softening the edges of his gaze. He looked tired—exhausted, but at the same time, completely at ease, as though everything that had happened earlier was already miles behind him.

 

Uzi exhaled softly, turning her gaze forward again.

 

She closed her eyes for a moment, savoring the brief stillness.

 

I’m finally going home.

 

Uzi’s eyes had only just begun to slip closed, her frame slowly sinking further into the seat. The dull rumble of the bus beneath her and the faint, rhythmic sway of the vehicle made it all too easy to let her thoughts drift into a comfortable haze.

 

Maybe I can just doze off for a bit.

 

But just as she felt herself slipping into that peaceful, heavy-lidded state, a sharp thought snapped her out of it.

 

Wait.

 

Her eyes shot open, blinking blearily.

 

She immediately sat up a bit straighter, her joints stiff from the sudden movement. She couldn’t fall asleep—she had to be alert. The bus driver wasn’t going to make a special announcement just for her, and it wasn’t like N would know when they reached her stop—he didn’t even know where she lived, or at least what the bus stop near her house looked like. If she wasn’t paying attention, they could both miss it.

 

She exhaled sharply through her nose, annoyed at herself for nearly dozing off. Her arms crossed briefly over her chest in mild frustration before she gave a faint huff and leaned forward slightly.

 

With a lazy motion, she slipped her hand into her pocket, pulling out her phone.

 

Fine. She’d just keep herself awake somehow.

 

She absently unlocked the screen with a dull swipe of her thumb, her eyes briefly squinting against the faint glow. She scrolled through her home screen, deciding on what app to click on. Should she go on a social media or listen to something? The latter sounded more appealing.

 

Her hand slipped into her pocket again, fishing out her wire headphones. She untangled the knotted cord with a few lazy tugs, then plugged them into her phone. The faint click of the jack seating into place was oddly satisfying. She was just about to place the earbuds into her ears, ready to drown herself in music or a random podcast to pass the time—

 

When she heard a soft voice cut through the low murmur of the bus.

 

“Uzi?”

 

Her name was spoken gently, almost uncertainly.

 

The sound of it was barely louder than the low hum of the bus engine, but it still caught her attention.

 

She blinked slightly, the familiar voice tugging her gaze to her side.

 

Her eyes landed on N.

 

When her eyes met his, he blinked once—slowly—his irises faintly reflective in the dim light. He stared at her for a beat, almost as if unsure whether or not to continue.

 

She blinked faintly, tilting her head slightly with a flat, casual look. “Yeah?” she muttered softly, her voice low and unbothered. She held his gaze, unsure what he was about to say.

 

For a moment, he was quiet.

 

Then, with a faint tilt of his head, he spoke up again.

 

“How long is the bus ride?” His tone was casual—his voice light and almost offhanded, as if he were just asking out of idle curiosity. His expression was still faintly tired, but not troubled.

 

Uzi gave a slight shrug, leaning back against the seat slightly. “About fifteen minutes,” she answered simply, her tone flat and matter-of-fact.

 

N gave a small, sluggish nod of acknowledgment, not seeming to mind the short wait.

 

He didn’t say anything else.

 

Uzi’s eyes lingered on him for a moment, then she exhaled faintly and turned back toward her phone.

 

She raised the earbuds slightly, ready to place them in—

 

But before she could, she heard his voice again.

 

It was softer this time.

 

Almost hesitant.

 

“Hey… Uzi?”

 

Her hands stilled slightly, and she glanced back at him.

 

The way he said her name was quieter now—softer. When she met his eyes, he was already looking at her. His expression had shifted—no longer idle or sluggish, but more genuine. There was a faint, tired softness to his eyes—a vulnerable sincerity that caught her off guard.

 

For a brief moment, he seemed to hesitate again.

 

But then he gave a faint, lopsided smile—slightly sheepish, shy, even. “Thanks,” he murmured softly, his voice low and sincere. The word was quiet, almost barely audible over the distant hum of the engine—but there was no mistaking the genuine warmth behind it.

 

Uzi blinked, momentarily caught off guard.

 

Her fingers slackened around the headphones, her hands still.

 

She didn’t say anything.

 

She simply stared at him, unsure if he was about to say anything else.

 

And then he did.

 

His eyes lowered slightly, his fingers absently fiddling with the hem of his sleeve as he exhaled softly. “I mean… for this,” he added, his voice barely above a murmur. He kept his eyes down as he spoke, his tone subdued.

 

His lips parted slightly, as though unsure how to phrase it.

 

But then, with a faint, awkward chuckle, he shrugged slightly. “I just… I really appreciate you looking out for me.” His voice was soft—barely more than a murmur.

 

But it was so genuine—so quietly grateful—it made Uzi’s chest tighten.

 

For a brief moment, she simply stared at him.

 

Her eyes lingered on his face, on the faint, tired softness of his expression. She could see the small, half-sheepish smile tugging faintly at the corner of his lips—the way his eyes softened slightly, as though quietly grateful simply for her presence.

 

And for some reason, that made her stomach flutter.

 

But she ignored the feeling.

 

Instead, she quickly exhaled through her nose, brushing off the unexpected warmth stirring in her chest. She forced her voice to remain casual—calm. “No problem,” she muttered, her tone deliberately flat, as though the entire thing was barely worth acknowledging.

 

Her eyes shifted away from him, her gaze returning toward her phone, as though the conversation hadn’t even affected her.

 

But the faint warmth still lingered softly in her chest—the feeling lingering just beneath her steady expression.

 

-

 

The bus gave a long, mechanical hiss as it slowed to a stop, the air brakes releasing with a faint exhale. The soft lurch of the vehicle coming to a halt stirred Uzi faintly from her thoughts.

 

She blinked once, then glanced out the window.

 

The dim streetlights flickered faintly through the fogged glass, casting a dull amber glow over the familiar stretch of road.

 

Her stop.

 

Finally. 

 

She exhaled sharply, feeling faint relief as she quickly pushed herself to her feet. But, as she turned toward N, ready to tell him it was time to go—

 

She froze.

 

He was fast asleep.

 

His frame was slumped faintly against the back of the seat, his head slightly tilted to the side. One of his arms was loosely draped over his lap, while the other rested faintly against his chest.His face was so slack and peaceful—his expression calm, almost childlike. The slight part of his lips and the slow, steady rise and fall of his chest made him look completely at ease.

 

He looks so… calm.

 

For a brief moment, Uzi’s expression softened faintly, her eyes lingering on him.

 

Her chest tightened slightly with that same, familiar warmth—the one she had been so desperately trying to ignore all night.

 

There was something about seeing him like this that made her heart flutter faintly, suddenly feeling light headed.

 

He just looked so—

 

She quickly shoved the thought aside, ignoring the way her throat tightened slightly.

 

No. Don’t even go there.

 

That wasn’t important right now.

 

She needed to wake him up before the bus started moving again.

 

Her eyes flicked toward the front, glancing at the driver—then back to N.

 

Come on, wake up.

 

“Hey… N,” she called softly, her voice barely louder than a murmur. She leaned toward him slightly, her voice quiet but firm.

 

But he didn’t stir.

 

His chest rose and fell steadily, his face still slack with sleep.

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly. “N,” she called again—this time louder. Her voice was more insistent now, with a faint edge of irritation.

 

That did the trick.

 

N stirred faintly, his eyes sluggishly blinking open.

 

For a brief moment, he simply squinted sleepily at her, his gaze dazed and confused. “Huh?” he mumbled softly, his voice low and disoriented, still heavy with sleep. His eyes were bleary, unfocused, barely registering where he was.

 

Uzi exhaled sharply through her nose, her frustration mounting.

 

Ugh. Seriously?

 

Her eyes flicked toward the driver again, watching the faint flicker of motion as he glanced in the rearview mirror.

 

The bus was going to start moving again soon.

 

She didn’t have time for this.

 

She groaned faintly under her breath, her hands clenching into fists at her sides as she briefly debated what to do.

 

But she didn’t have time to argue with herself.

 

Without giving herself the chance to overthink it, she reached down and grabbed his hand. Her fingers loosely curled around his, her grip firm but not forceful.

 

She gave him a light tug.

 

The contact was brief, fleeting.

 

But her face instantly burned.

 

A sharp, involuntary jolt of warmth shot through her at the realization.

 

Was she really doing this?

 

…It’s not like she had another choice.

 

Her hand curled slightly around his, holding him with just enough firmness to urge him forward. The texture of his hand was warm against hers, his fingers slightly limp in his half-asleep daze.

 

And for a split second, she was irrationally aware of it. Why does this even bother me? she scolded herself internally, heat prickling faintly at the back of her neck.

 

I’m just waking him up, that’s it. Don’t be weird about it.

 

Thankfully, N finally stirred. His eyes blinked open a bit wider, gradually focusing. He let out a soft, sleepy murmur of recognition.“Oh,” he mumbled softly, his voice low and groggy. He sluggishly pushed himself to his feet, still mostly disoriented, his movements loose and heavy with sleep.

 

His hand remained in hers briefly as he rose, letting her guide him forward slightly.

 

He was still slightly groggy, but he followed her without resistance, allowing himself to be pulled forward.

 

But after a few paces, she quickly realized he was walking on his own now—his footing steady.

 

Without thinking, she let go.

 

Her hand slipped away from his, falling back at her side.

 

She shoved it into her pocket, trying to ignore the faint, lingering warmth still prickling her palm.

 

She didn’t look at him.

 

Didn’t even bother glancing over her shoulder.

 

She just kept her eyes forward, her expression as steady and disinterested as ever.

 

She wasn’t thinking about it. She wasn’t. 

 

Without another word, the two of them descended the steps of the bus and stepped out onto the street, the night air cool against her heated skin.

 

-

 

The walk back to Uzi’s house was steeped in a heavy silence.

 

The soft crunch of gravel beneath their feet and the occasional distant hum of passing cars were the only sounds filling the quiet stretch of road.

 

N walked beside her, his pace casual but steady, his hands loosely tucked into his jacket pockets.

 

He didn’t say anything.

 

And neither did she.

 

Uzi kept her eyes fixed straight ahead, forcing herself not to glance in his direction. She was hyper-aware of him, though—far more than she wanted to be. She could feel the warmth of his presence beside her, the faint sound of his footsteps syncing with her own.

 

But she didn’t dare look at him.

 

She kept her gaze on the cracked pavement beneath her feet, silently willing herself to stay focused.

 

Just keep walking. You’re almost there.

 

Finally, the familiar outline of her house came into view, the dark silhouette of the modest one-story structure standing faintly against the dim backdrop of the night sky.

 

Relief washed over her.

 

She barely slowed her pace as they reached the front porch, eager to get inside.

 

Without a word, she slipped her hand into her jacket pocket, fishing out her keys.

 

Her fingers were slightly clumsy from the cold, fumbling briefly with the small metal ring before she pinched the right one between her thumb and forefinger. As she slipped the key into the lock, she decided this was probably a good time to speak up.

 

“You can just crash on the couch,” she said offhandedly, her voice light and flat. She kept her voice was casual—too casual—feigning an air of easy indifference, like this was just a regular sleepover and not a wildly complicated situation.

 

Her eyes remained fixed on the key as she twisted it, not daring to look at him.

 

“My dad won’t care or anything. I’ve had guys sleep over before.”  She quickly added. She kept her voice steady, nonchalant, as if she were stating something as simple as the weather.

 

She wasn’t lying.

 

She had had guy friends sleep over before—mostly back in middle school.

 

Like she was thinking about earlier, one time Thad had stayed over after they had both passed out playing video games all night.

 

It wasn’t a big deal.

 

This wasn’t any different.

 

Her words were meant to be reassuring—calm, offhand, and unassuming—she didn’t want to make things weird. Though, for whatever reason, her stomach briefly tightened with nerves as she waited for his reaction.

 

To her relief, N didn’t seem to think anything of it. He simply nodded once, his expression relaxed, and offered her a small, easy smile. “Okay,” he said softly, his voice low and unbothered. There was no hesitation in his tone—no awkwardness or uncertainty.

 

He was entirely unfazed.

 

Uzi exhaled faintly, relieved.

 

She finally turned the key, unlocking the door with a faint click. As she pushed it open, she glanced over her shoulder at him, her voice soft but even. “You can just leave in the morning. Ride the bus back and get your car,” she added. She continued to keep her tone deliberately flat—businesslike, almost.

 

She didn’t want it to feel like she was making some big deal out of it. N nodded once again, his expression still relaxed and easy. “Got it,” he replied simply, his voice light. There was no tension in his words—just easy acceptance, as if they were simply discussing plans for the next day… because they were.

 

With that, she finally pushed the door open and stepped inside, the hinges giving a faint creak as she swung it inward. The familiar warmth of her home greeted her, the subtle scent of wood polish and faint lingering smell from whatever dinner her dad ate still clinging faintly to the air.

 

As she walked in, she felt N quietly step in behind her.

 

For a brief moment, she kept her eyes forward, still avoiding looking at him entirely. Her fingers instinctively curled slightly into the fabric of her jacket pocket, her knuckles faintly tense. Her chest still felt annoyingly tight, and she didn’t understand why.

 

She needed to stop overthinking this.

 

It was fine. He was fine. She was fine.

 

She just had to keep it together.

 

As Uzi stepped further into the house, she barely registered the familiar warmth of the entryway or the faint creak of the wooden floor beneath their feet. Her mind was already preoccupied—she was focused on one thing: getting to her room, changing into her pajamas, and bringing N a blanket and pillow so he could sleep comfortably on the couch.

 

That was it.

 

Nothing more.

 

She was going to keep this simple.

 

But then, as they entered the living room, her stomach suddenly dropped.

 

The soft, flickering glow of the television illuminated the room in a muted haze, the screen displaying some tacky late-night infomercial about a multipurpose kitchen gadget.

 

…And sprawled out on the couch, arm slung haphazardly over his chest, was her dad—fast asleep.His head was tilted awkwardly against the couch cushion, his mouth slightly open, and he was snoring.

 

Loudly.  

 

Uzi froze in place, her eyes locking onto the couch.

 

Her stomach twisted uncomfortably.

 

No… no, no, no.

 

She stared at her dad’s sleeping form, her mind already racing.

 

Of course he would be sleeping there.

 

She had completely forgotten he sometimes conked out in the living room when he stayed up too late watching TV.

 

And now, N didn’t have anywhere to sleep.

 

There was no way she could let him crash on the same couch her dad was snoring on.

 

That would be beyond weird.

 

And the thought of having to explain it all to her dad?

 

Nope.

 

Absolutely not.

 

The idea of that awkward conversation alone made her throat tighten with dread.

 

Her pulse quickened slightly, and she could feel the weight of rising panic gnawing faintly at her chest.

 

What was she supposed to do now?

 

Forcing her breathing to stay steady, she flicked her gaze toward N. He was staring at the couch, his eyes hazy, his daze still noticeable.

 

But he was definitely aware enough to notice the situation.

 

Great. Just great.

 

Uzi’s stomach knotted further.

 

She wanted nothing more than to just vanish into thin air.

 

Why couldn’t she catch a break tonight?

 

Before she could stop herself, she blurted out the first thing that came to her mind. She forced a breathy, awkward laugh, her voice coming out slightly strained and stilted, clearly betraying her discomfort. “Ha—uh, yeah… just ignore him,” she muttered, cringing inwardly at how forced she sounded.

 

Her eyes flicked toward the couch again, and she quickly glanced back at N, offering him a feeble, slightly stiff smile.

 

“Sorry,” she added, trying to make it sound casual, but it came out far too tight, her voice cracking slightly on the word. She barely gave him a chance to respond before she quickly tacked on another suggestion, her voice rushed and almost too eager to smooth over the situation.

 

“Uh—y-you can just come in my room or whatever until I can get him off the couch.”

 

Her words came out too quickly, too unceremoniously, and she instantly regretted the clumsy phrasing.

 

Jeez, why did she have to say it like that?*

 

Her throat tightened further.

 

It wasn’t like she was implying anything, obviously, but still—it sounded weird in her head the second she said it.

 

Just come in my room or whatever.

 

Her face heated slightly, but she fought to keep her expression neutral, plastering on a stiff, strained smile in some feeble attempt to seem composed.

 

For a moment, she braced herself for N to look confused or weirded out or even question the suggestion.

 

But he didn’t.

 

He simply blinked once, his expression still hazy and sluggish, then gave her a small, sleepy nod.

 

“Okay,” he mumbled softly, his voice barely above a murmur.

 

There was no hesitation in his tone—no second thought or awkwardness. Just simply easy indifference

 

His tired, dazed eyes barely lingered on her for more than a second before he started to follow her again without question.

 

That was it.

 

No reaction.

 

No weirdness.

 

No awkwardness.

 

Just… okay.

 

And somehow, that made Uzi’s heart stutter slightly in her chest.

 

She wasn’t sure why.

 

But she quickly shoved the feeling down, turning sharply on her heel as she started walking toward her room, barely daring to look at him. Her hands curled faintly into the fabric of her jacket pockets as she forced her feet to keep moving, her breath faintly unsteady. She kept her gaze ahead, her expression carefully schooled into something flat and unreadable.

 

Just keep walking. Don’t overthink it.

 

It’s fine.

 

Everything’s fine.

 

As they reached her room, Uzi slowed her steps slightly, then turned to face N.

 

When she spoke, her voice came out a little too tight at first, but she quickly smoothed it over, forcing herself to sound casual. “Uh—just gimme a sec,” she muttered, flashing him a quick, faintly strained smile.

 

She had tried to make her tone sound light—offhanded, even—but she was very aware of the slight crack in her voice and the way her words came out just a little too fast.

 

N simply blinked at her sluggishly. His expression was still relaxed—dazed and faintly sleepy, his eyes heavy-lidded but calm. He just gave her a slow, easy nod, then casually leaned back against the wall beside the door, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets without a word.

 

No questions. No confusion. Just… patient.

 

Uzi forced herself not to linger on how easily he trusted her and quickly turned away. She slipped into her room, gently closing the door behind her. The second it clicked shut, she exhaled sharply.

 

Her eyes immediately scanned over the room.

 

And her stomach plummeted.

 

Oh no.

 

It was a complete disaster.

 

Clothes were scattered haphazardly across the floor, creating an unsightly trail of rumpled hoodies and mismatched socks leading toward her bed. Her sheets were tangled and messy, the blanket halfway sliding off the mattress, looking like she had wrestled a tornado in her sleep. Crumpled pieces of sketchbook paper littered the carpet—half-finished drawings and discarded doodles from earlier that week.

 

And her stuffed animals—ones she definitely should have retired years ago—were still out in the open, nestled near the corner of her bed like she was some kind of toddler. Uzi stared at the chaos for half a second, feeling her face instantly flush with embarrassment.

 

Oh robo-god.

 

Her entire body went rigid.

 

Of all drones…

 

Of course it had to be N who was about to see this mess.

 

Her mind instantly spiraled into a mild state of internal panic.

 

He’s gonna think I’m a total slob.

 

Her chest tightened, and before she could think twice, she launched into action. Her movements were frantic but efficient, running entirely on impulse and mortified determination.

 

She dashed across the room, grabbing armfuls of clothes, barely bothering to check if they were clean or dirty, and shoved them haphazardly into her closet. When the closet started to overflow, she frantically kicked a few stray socks and shirts under her bed, shoving them as far back as she could. Next, she threw herself at her bed, yanking the sheets and blanket into some semblance of order, smoothing them over with swift, clumsy motions.

 

Her hands trembled slightly from rushing, but she didn’t slow down—tucking, smoothing, flattening—making it look somewhat presentable. It was probably the fastest she had ever made her bed in her life.

 

Then, with barely a moment to breathe, she lunged for the stuffed animals. Her fingers curled around them, and she unceremoniously flung them over the far side of her bed, completely out of sight.

 

Her face burned hotter.

 

Why do I even still have those?!

 

Finally, she turned her attention to the scattered sketchbook paper. She grabbed handfuls of it, crumpling the more embarrassing, unfinished doodles and shoving them into her desk drawers with frantic, jerky movements. The rest she tossed into the trash can, not even bothering to sort through them.

 

Her breaths were quick and shallow by the time she finished, her chest rising and falling slightly. She whipped her head around, scanning the room one last time, searching for any sign of remaining mess.

 

Miraculously, it looked… halfway decent.

 

Still lived-in, but not completely disastrous.

 

She exhaled sharply, placing her hands on her hips for a moment as she stared at the results of her lightning-fast clean-up job. Her heart was still beating a little too fast, and her hands felt faintly clammy, but she quickly ran them down her jacket, trying to shake off the nervous energy. She took a slow, measured breath, closing her eyes briefly, forcing herself to regain her composure. Her fingers curled briefly into her pockets, squeezing the fabric lightly.

 

It’s fine. He won’t even notice. Just be casual.

 

She smoothed her expression into something neutral, forcing her features into practiced nonchalance. Then, she turned back toward the door, exhaling quietly once more before opening it.

 

When she did, she was met with the sight of N, still leaning against the wall. His head was tilted slightly to the side, eyes half-lidded, and he looked completely casual—utterly unfazed, as if he had no concept of how chaotic her mini cleaning spree had just been.

 

He glanced over at her slowly, blinking once.

 

His posture was so relaxed, so unbothered, that it made Uzi’s earlier frenzy feel even *more* ridiculous. She barely suppressed the urge to groan at herself. Instead, she forced a breathy laugh, hoping it sounded casual instead of nervous.

 

“Sorry—uh… just had to, y’know, tidy up real quick,” she muttered, rubbing the back of her neck slightly, trying to make her tone sound light and unconcerned. Her voice cracked faintly on the word “tidy.”

 

Smooth.

 

N didn’t seem to notice—or if he did, he didn’t care. He simply blinked once, then offered her a small, easy smile. “It’s fine,” he said softly, his voice still warm and a little sleepy.

 

The words came out gentle and unhurried, like he meant them.

 

“I get it.”  He added with a faint nod, Then, without a second thought, he walked inside.

 

Uzi quickly stepped aside to let him in, trying not to think too hard about the way her chest tightened slightly at how casual he was. No teasing—no questioning why she was suddenly flustered.

 

Just calm, easy-going indifference.

 

And somehow, that made her feel even more flustered.

 

She barely managed to keep her expression neutral as she quietly shut the door behind them. Uzi forced herself to ignore the rapid thudding of her heart as she shifted slightly, pulling in a slow breath through her nose.

 

She turned toward N, her voice deliberately light and casual.

 

“You can, uh… sit wherever,” she offered with a small, nonchalant wave of her hand, gesturing vaguely toward the bed, the desk chair, or the floor—wherever he felt like.

 

Her voice was steady, but she felt the words catch slightly in her throat.

 

She shoved her hands into her jacket pockets to keep them from fidgeting and added a little too quickly, “I’m just gonna change real quick.” Her tone was deliberately offhanded, like it was no big deal—like she wasn’t at all hyper-aware of the way her pulse was pounding beneath her skin.

 

N glanced at her briefly, his expression still relaxed, unfazed. He simply gave an easy nod. “Okay,” he murmured softly. His voice was so calm that Uzi almost felt silly for being so wound up.

 

She turned slightly toward her closet, but then paused, hesitating. She glanced over her shoulder at him again, biting the inside of her cheek briefly before deciding to just say it.

 

“Hey,” she started, her tone still light, trying not to make a big deal of it. “You wanna, like… borrow some clothes or something?” She arched a brow slightly, her voice deliberately casual—as if the offer were purely practical and nothing else.

 

N blinked once.

 

For a second, he looked faintly surprised.

 

Then, he gave her a slightly confused, lopsided smile, raising an eyebrow.. “You even have anything that would fit me?” he asked with a hint of playful skepticism, his voice still low and quiet, but teasing ever so slightly.

 

Uzi huffed softly, rolling her eyes in mock exasperation. “Yeah, for sure,” she replied breezily, flashing him a brief, confident smirk. She shrugged, as if it were obvious. “Half my closet’s basically oversized and half of its men’s clothes anyway,” she added with a casual wave of her hand.

 

She was never the type to fuss over the latest trends or obsess over looking perfectly feminine. If it suited her style—or if it was comfortable—she wore it. Simple as that. Without waiting for his response, she turned and headed toward her closet. She pulled the door open and scanned the rows of hanging clothes for a moment, briefly sorting through them with swift, practiced motions.

 

Eventually, her fingers landed on a navy blue hoodie with a graphic design on the front. It was comfortably oversized and worn in just the right way—the kind of hoodie that practically swallowed you whole. She tugged it from the hanger, holding it briefly before heading to her dresser. Pulling open the drawer, she rifled through the neatly folded clothes and grabbed a pair of plain grey pajama pants for him.

 

As she held the hoodie and pants together, she gave a brief nod of approval. They’d fit him fine. Maybe a little baggy, but definitely comfortable. Satisfied, she quickly grabbed her own clothes: a zip-up black hoodie, her usual forest green plaid pajama pants, and a black tank top.

 

She turned back to N, holding the spare clothes in her hands, then with a casual toss, she flung the hoodie and pants toward him. “Here,” she said simply, her voice deliberately even. N barely had time to blink before catching the bundle clumsily against his chest. He glanced down at the clothes, then back up at her with a slightly puzzled, almost amused look—but he didn’t question it.

 

Uzi didn’t stick around for his reaction. Without another word, she grabbed her own set of clothes and turned, heading toward the bathroom. As she walked, she felt the heat creep faintly up the back of her neck.

 

She exhaled slowly, trying to steady her pulse, but her fingers still tightened slightly around the fabric in her hands.

 

Why did that feel so weird?

 

It wasn’t like she hadn’t loaned clothes to friends before. This was completely normal.

 

Totally normal.

 

Still, she could feel her chest tightening slightly as she shut the bathroom door behind her. She leaned back against it for a brief second, closing her eyes. Her heart was still beating too fast.

 

Get it together.

 

She exhaled sharply through her nose, shook her head faintly, then pushed off the door. Tearing her jacket off, she tossed it aside. She moved quickly, changing into her pajamas with fast, efficient motions, trying to distract herself from how strangely jittery she felt. As she tugged her hoodie over her tank top and pulled the drawstrings into place, she inhaled slowly, trying to slow her breathing. The cool fabric against her skin helped ground her slightly.

 

By the time she finished, she stared at herself briefly in the mirror, smoothing her hair down once before forcing herself to relax her shoulders.

 

Just act normal.

 

With that final thought, she turned, unlocked the door, and walked out, her expression carefully schooled into casual indifference.

Notes:

I love this chapter it’s so silly

Uzi’s still internally panicking the whole time while N is just chilling

Then, Uzi gets to her house, and her plans of having N sleep on the couch are ruined cuz her dad is sleeping there and he’s snoring loud asf 😭

She feels really awkward already, then it’s even worse when she gets in her room and it’s an absolute *mess* like a tornado blew through it 😭

She def never cleans her room unless she’s expecting guest, and this is like the worst case scenario for her cuz she wasn’t expecting N to go into her house, nonetheless her room 😭

Anyways

I can’t wait to post the next few chapters, I like them way more than I liked the last 2-3

See u then

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 46: A Scary Movie

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

When Uzi walked back into her room, she froze briefly, blinking in mild surprise.

 

N was already changed.

 

Her eyes flicked toward the clothes she’d given him—her hoodie and pajama pants fitting him a little loosely but comfortably. The navy fabric slouched slightly over his frame, and the sleeves hung just a bit past his wrists, giving him an unintentionally cozy look.

 

Her gaze lowered slightly, catching sight of his old clothes, now neatly folded and placed beside her desk.

 

She exhaled softly in relief.

 

Thank robo-god, she thought.

 

Had she walked in even a minute earlier and caught him still changing, she was pretty sure she would have self-destructed on the spot.

 

Her face grew warm just thinking about it, and she quickly shoved the thought into the furthest corner of her mind.

 

She didn’t dwell on it. Didn’t even let herself dwell on it.

 

Without giving her brain a chance to overthink, she shifted her weight slightly and forced herself to speak. “Hey,” she started, her voice deliberately casual, but with a slight, almost awkward hesitation.

 

N turned toward her, blinking softly as he met her eyes.

 

She opened her mouth slightly, but for half a second, she faltered. The words caught in her throat, and she almost bailed entirely—but instead, she pushed through, blurting the first thing that came to mind.

 

“You, uh… wanna watch a movie or something?” Her voice was just a little too quick, a little too casual, but she masked it with a forced shrug, as if the idea was entirely on a whim.

 

It wasn’t like she was particularly energetic—she was still exhausted from the night’s events. But after the walk and the bus ride, she felt just awake enough that the idea of lying down and watching a movie didn’t sound half bad.

 

Besides, it gave her some time to think.

 

Where the hell am I gonna put him for the night?

 

Her stomach twisted at the thought.

 

She really didn’t want to wake her dad, not unless she absolutely had to. It wasn’t that her dad would care that N was a guy—Uzi had crashed with guy friends before.

 

But this was different.

 

It was almost 11 at night, and she hadn’t mentioned anything about having someone stay over. Her dad would definitely ask questions. And given how much of a train wreck tonight had been, the last thing she wanted was to explain herself. She felt her throat tighten slightly at the thought, the weight of the situation pressing in.

 

What the hell was I thinking?

 

She almost winced at herself.

 

It wasn’t like she regretted helping N—no, not at all. She’d do it again in a heartbeat. At least this way, she knew he was safe. She knew he wasn’t out there driving home while still hazy from the effects of the weed brownie.

 

But still… she hadn’t exactly thought things through.

 

Her chest tightened faintly at the realization, and she inhaled sharply through her nose.

 

Too late now.

 

She exhaled softly, her shoulders sinking slightly with a quiet, defeated sigh.

 

But before she could spiral further into her thoughts, N’s voice pulled her back to the present. When she glanced back at him, she was met with a warm, genuine smile.

 

“Yeah,” he said softly, his voice low and gentle. “That sounds great.” His eyes crinkled slightly at the corners, and the sincerity in his tone made her stomach flip unexpectedly.

 

He didn’t question her suggestion. Didn’t hesitate.

 

He just… agreed. Easily. Naturally.

 

Uzi stared at him for half a second longer than she meant to, before quickly averting her gaze. Her heart gave a subtle, treacherous flutter in her chest, but she ignored it. Instead, she exhaled slowly, her throat still a little tight, and turned toward her bed, walking over to grab the remote.

 

Her fingers brushed over the buttons, her mind momentarily fuzzy as she scanned through the streaming services. She tried to focus on finding something to watch, but she was keenly aware of N still standing nearby, waiting patiently.

 

Her face warmed faintly again.

 

Just act normal.

 

Uzi kept her eyes fixed on the TV, her fingers mindlessly scrolling through the menu as she browsed the endless, familiar wall of streaming options. Her gaze was locked on the screen, but her focus? Completely fractured. Every few seconds, her attention flickered—drawn by the faint presence at the edge of her peripheral vision.

 

She glanced over at N, almost involuntarily.

 

He was still standing there, a few steps from her bed, hands tucked loosely in the pockets of the pajama pants she’d given him.

 

He looked… hesitant.

 

Not uncomfortable, just unsure—like he didn’t quite know what he was supposed to do with himself. Her eyes trailed over his uncertain expression, the slight crease of confusion at his brow, the subtle downward twitch at the corners of his mouth.

 

She let out a quiet, tired sigh through her nose.  Without giving herself a chance to overthink, she shifted slightly, scooting over to the side of the bed and sitting up against the headboard.

 

The pillows sank slightly beneath her weight as she adjusted, leaning back against them with a lazy slump.

 

Then, she turned her head and spoke.

 

“Hey,” she said, her voice soft but casual, “You can, uh… sit here if you want.” She gestured toward the open space beside her with a small tilt of her head, doing her best to sound nonchalant—as if the offer wasn’t that big of a deal.

 

And it wasn’t, right?

 

They were just going to watch a movie. It wasn’t weird. It was fine.

 

Her heart was absolutely not racing.

 

…Right?

 

For half a second, N’s eyes widened slightly, as if surprised by the invitation—but then his expression softened. A faint, genuine smile spread across his face, gentle and unguarded. “Thank you,” he said softly, his voice quiet but warm. Without hesitation, he crawled onto the bed, moving with an almost fluid, easygoing motion.

 

He sat down beside her, mirroring her position—his back leaning comfortably against the headboard, arms resting loosely at his sides.

 

But despite the closeness, he left a respectful amount of space between them. Not far enough to be distant, but just enough that it didn’t feel too familiar.

 

Uzi caught herself glancing at him from the corner of her eye. Her gaze drifted to his face—the relaxed set of his features, the way his eyes were slightly lidded, tired but at ease.

 

He looked… comfortable.

 

At peace, even.

 

Her chest tightened unexpectedly, a strange, warm pressure settling just beneath her ribs.

 

Before she could think too much about it, she forced herself to speak. “So, uh…” she started, her voice slightly uneven. Her throat suddenly felt annoyingly tight, and she cleared it softly before finishing. “W-what do you wanna watch?” She winced inwardly at how her words stumbled slightly over each other.

 

Smooth.

 

But N didn’t seem to notice. He merely turned to her, blinking slowly, before offering a small shrug. “I don’t mind,” he said, his tone light and easy. “Whatever you wanna watch is fine with me.” His voice was calm, almost absent of preference, like he genuinely didn’t care what they put on.

 

Uzi stared at him for a half second longer than she meant to. His expression was soft, completely free of judgment. Just… relaxed. Trusting. And somehow, that only made her stomach flutter worse.

 

She tore her eyes away, exhaling softly through her nose.

 

Great.

 

Now she had to actually pick something.

 

Her thumb mindlessly scrolled the remote’s wheel as she skimmed over the endless options—titles she barely registered. Her eyes moved over the list, but her brain refused to focus.

 

She could feel the subtle presence of N sitting beside her, close enough that she could feel him shifting beside her, getting comfortable in his spot.

 

Her stomach knotted subtly.

 

It’s fine. Just pick something.

 

She inhaled slowly, hoping that focusing on the movie would help drown out the confusing pressure building behind her ribs. But no matter how many titles she passed, she wasn’t really paying attention. Her brain was far too preoccupied with the steady presence at her side.

 

Uzi’s thumb lazily flicked the remote, scrolling through the endless sea of movie options. The longer she searched, the more restless she became—her patience thinning by the second.

 

Finally, she paused on a horror movie.

 

Without much thought, she clicked on it.

 

Her eyes briefly flicked over to N, expecting to see the same relaxed, easygoing expression he’d worn all night.

 

But instead… he looked somewhat uneasy.

 

Not nervous exactly—there was nothing severe about it—but his brow furrowed slightly, and his mouth pressed into a faint, uncertain line. She caught the brief flicker of hesitation in his eyes before he murmured softly, his voice quiet and slightly unsure.

 

“...That one?” His tone wasn’t accusatory, just vaguely apprehensive—like he was trying not to sound reluctant.

 

Uzi blinked, caught slightly off guard by the subtle shift in his demeanor. Her head tilted slightly in confusion. “Yeah?” she replied, her voice tinged with mild curiosity. Her eyes narrowed faintly, scanning his face. “Why? Something wrong with it?”

 

N’s eyes widened slightly, as if startled by the directness of her question. He let out a soft, slightly awkward laugh, his hand lifting instinctively to rub the back of his neck. “No, it’s just, uh…” he trailed off for a second, his gaze briefly darting to the side before landing back on her. He offered a sheepish smile, his tone light but noticeably unconvincing. “I just… don’t really like horror movies.” His voice was quiet, almost hesitant—like he was downplaying it, trying not to make a big deal out of it.

 

Uzi’s eyes widened faintly in realization.

 

Oh.

 

Right.

 

She suddenly remembered—he had mentioned that before. When they were at Rebecca’s house with the group, N and Emily had been the only ones opposed to watching a horror movie, and opted for something more light-hearted. She hadn’t thought much of it at the time, but…

 

Now that she thought about it, she felt a faint pang of guilt in her chest. Without thinking, she spoke up, her tone casual but genuinely offering, trying to backpedal slightly. “Oh—uh, we can watch something else, then,” she said quickly, her voice lighter than she felt.

 

She was already moving to back out of the movie when N shook his head slightly, offering her a reassuring, albeit slightly forced smile. “No, no—it’s fine,” he said quickly, holding up a hand slightly as if to wave off the suggestion.

 

His eyes softened slightly as he glanced at her, his voice gentle, reassuring. “Really—it’s okay. We can watch it if you want to.” But even as he spoke, she could hear the faint hesitation in his voice—the slight tightness in his tone.

 

He was trying to be polite.

 

Trying to let her have her way, even if he wasn’t entirely comfortable. For a split second, Uzi hesitated, glancing at him uncertainly. Her fingers hovered over the remote, torn between hitting back or just letting the movie play.

 

She briefly considered switching it to something else entirely—but the idea of spending several more minutes awkwardly scrolling through movies, all while N reassured her that he didn’t care and whatever was fine, felt even more uncomfortable. Not to mention, the awkward silence would only stretch longer.

 

It’s fine, she told herself, though the pang of guilt didn’t subside. If N was really that uncomfortable, he would’ve insisted. Right?

 

She exhaled softly, then shrugged. “Alright,” she muttered quietly, almost as much to herself as to him. With a click of the remote, the movie began to play.

 

But as the opening credits rolled, she felt a slight weight settle in her chest.

 

The longer she sat there, the more she couldn’t help but feel a little bad. Of course he would say it was fine—he was too considerate to make a big deal out of it. She should’ve remembered he didn’t like horror. She did remember, too late.

 

Her gaze flickered to him subtly from the corner of her eye. His face was calm, but she could see the slight stiffness in his posture—the faint tension in his shoulders. He wasn’t trembling or fidgeting, just… subtly rigid.

 

Her stomach twisted with guilt. But she said nothing, forcing herself to focus on the movie. She didn’t want to make things more awkward by asking him again.

 

As the movie flickered across the screen, painting shifting shapes of light against the walls, Uzi tugged a blanket over her legs, letting its warmth settle around her.

 

Without thinking, she shifted slightly, drawing her knees up to her chest. She loosely wrapped her arms around her legs, hugging them to herself in a familiar, comforting posture. The soft fabric of the blanket bunched around her, and she rested her chin lightly against her knees, settling in.

 

But as her eyes drifted back to the screen, she couldn’t help but glance sideways at N. Her gaze lingered on him for a moment, taking in his posture.

 

That was when she noticed it—his slight shiver. It was faint, almost imperceptible—the subtle tremor in his frame, the brief way his shoulders gave a minuscule twitch. It was the kind of shiver a drone might unconsciously suppress when trying to not make a big deal out of being cold.

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed faintly in realization.

 

Right… she reminded herself.

 

Her room was probably freezing.

 

She was used to it—it was how she liked it. The chill was almost soothing to her. She preferred her room borderline cold, kept her fan on even when it wasn’t necessary, and never bothered turning the heat up.

 

But she hadn’t considered that N, who was already tired, probably still a little disoriented, and clearly too polite to say anything, was sitting there shivering. The realization made something tug sharply in her chest—a small, unexpected pang of guilt mixed with empathy.

 

Why didn’t he say anything? she wondered.

 

Did he feel like it would be rude?

 

The thought made her chest tighten slightly.

 

Without hesitating, she spoke up, her voice soft but casual, cutting through the faint hum of the movie’s audio. “Hey… you want a blanket?” she asked lightly, keeping her tone as nonchalant as possible. Even though her voice was quiet, but the sound of it made N glance toward her.

 

And before she could fully prepare herself, their eyes met. For a split second, Uzi felt her breath catch slightly in her throat.

 

Her heart stuttered in her chest—just once—an irritatingly involuntary reaction she immediately ignored. She forced herself to maintain the eye contact, even as the warmth she could feel rising to her face made her ears burn faintly.

 

But to her relief, N’s gaze shifted away after only a brief moment. He blinked once, then let his eyes drift downward slightly, his voice quiet and low when he finally answered. “…Yeah,” he murmured softly. His tone was almost a little sheepish, as if mildly reluctant to admit it. “I’d appreciate that.” There was a faint trace of gratitude in his voice—almost embarrassed by the fact that she had noticed, but still clearly relieved.

 

Uzi didn’t say anything—simply shifted forward slightly, leaning toward the edge of her bed. She reached out, fingers brushing over the soft, thick material of the blanket she had messily folded earlier when she hastily cleaned her room. Pulling it into her arms, she turned back and handed it to him. N’s eyes softened slightly with quiet gratitude as he took it from her, offering her a small nod.

 

“Thanks,” he murmured softly, his voice low and genuine. Without another word, he unfolded the blanket and draped it over his shoulders. The fabric pooled around him slightly, and he tucked it closer, wrapping himself in its warmth.

 

For a brief moment, Uzi’s eyes lingered on him. She watched as the slight shiver that had been running through his frame gradually eased, his shoulders relaxing slightly beneath the blanket’s weight.

 

Her chest felt warmer than she expected.

 

She could feel the corner of her mouth twitch faintly, almost forming a small smile—but she quickly looked away before it could.

 

At least he’s comfortable now, she told herself, ignoring the strange, unfamiliar flutter in her chest.

 

Turning her attention back to the screen, she focused on the movie.

 

Or at least she tried to.

 

As the movie continued play, it casted a dim, eerie light across the room. Shadows from the TV moved faintly against the walls, stretching and shifting with each sudden cut and sharp flash of color. The surround sound filled the space with unsettling creaks, ominous music, and the occasional jagged swell of suspenseful strings.

 

Uzi remained relatively quiet, her eyes fixed on the screen, but she wasn’t really watching. She was too aware of N beside her—the faint warmth of his presence at her side and the subtle movements she kept catching in her peripheral vision.

 

He hadn’t spoken, not once, but she could feel his discomfort.

 

She noticed the way he subtly tensed during the heavier moments of suspense—the scenes that built up an almost unbearable anticipation. His posture stiffened slightly, and when the inevitable jump scare hit, he jolted just faintly. It wasn’t exaggerated, but it was there—a quick, startled flinch.

 

And when the tension in the movie grew too thick, she saw how he pulled the blanket up a little higher, almost like a shield.

 

There were moments where he even dipped his head slightly, sinking deeper into the fabric, and she caught the brief way his fingers curled, grasping the edge of the blanket tightly.

 

Once, during a particularly abrupt scare, he quickly raised the blanket just high enough to shield part of his face, as if instinctively trying to block it out.

 

Uzi’s chest tightened faintly.

 

He’s really not enjoying this…

 

The realization made her stomach twist with guilt.

 

Why didn’t I just pick something else?

 

Her fingers curled slightly against the edge of her blanket, gripping it with quiet self-reproach. She knew if she offered to stop the movie, N would probably just shake his head, brushing it off like it was nothing. He’d insist he was fine—say he didn’t mind. He’d give her that easygoing smile and probably tell her she could keep watching whatever she wanted.

 

But clearly, he wasn’t having a good time.

 

She could see it in the way he occasionally glanced at the screen with reluctant apprehension, as if bracing for whatever was coming next. She noticed how he shrank slightly into the blanket with every sharp noise.

 

Her chest ached faintly with sympathy.

 

She wasn’t even sure why it bothered her so much. Maybe it was just because she knew he was too considerate to say anything about it—too kind to tell her he didn’t want to watch something that made him uncomfortable.

 

The guilt gnawed at her.

 

For twenty long minutes, she sat there, trying to focus on the movie, but she couldn’t. She kept catching herself glancing at N every few seconds—her gaze lingering on the way his fingers nervously fidgeted with the edge of the blanket or how he subtly shifted when the music built with tension.

 

It was getting to her.

 

Her stomach twisted uncomfortably, the guilt slowly pooling into an ache she couldn’t ignore.

 

She wanted to do something.

 

But she didn’t know what.

 

She was still debating with herself—trying to figure out if she should just shut the movie off entirely—when her eyes lowered slightly and caught sight of N’s hand. It rested on the bed beside him, partially on the blanket but still visible.

 

Close.

 

Within reach.

 

She stared at it for a moment, her gaze fixated on the subtle curve of his fingers. His hand lay there, relaxed but slightly fidgeting—his thumb occasionally brushing faintly over the fabric beneath it.

 

Without fully processing what she was doing, her eyes lingered on it, and the faintest trace of an idea flickered into her mind.

 

Her chest tightened slightly.

 

No…

 

No way.

 

Her heart thudded once, heavy and sharp.

 

She stared at his hand.

 

Was she seriously about to…?

 

Her fingers curled slightly under the blanket, a hesitant tremor running through them. She could feel her pulse pick up faintly in her ears.

 

What if he pulled away?

 

What if he looked at her weird?

 

What if he asked her what she was doing?

 

The rapid swirl of thoughts made her chest tighten—but before she could overthink herself into paralysis, her hand was already moving.

 

Slow. Tentative.

 

Barely even breathing, she slipped her hand out from under the blanket, feeling the cool air nip at her exposed fingers. Her movements were sluggish, hesitant, as though her body still wasn’t fully convinced this was a good idea.

 

Her heart was beating faster than it should’ve been.

 

Her hand hovered just a breath away from his—close enough that she could feel the faint heat radiating from him.

 

She stared at the space between their hands for a fraction of a second too long, hesitating so much she nearly lost her nerve.

 

But then, before she could talk herself out of it, she gently—very gently—let her fingers brush against his.

 

At the initial contact, N startled faintly.

 

She felt him flinch ever so slightly—his fingers twitching just briefly, as though caught off guard. For a split second, he turned and glanced at her, clearly puzzled by the sudden touch.

 

The moment his eyes met hers, Uzi’s stomach immediately dropped.

 

Her throat tightened.

 

Her hand nearly jerked back on reflex, panic threatening to take over.

 

Oh no.

 

What am I doing?!

 

Her fingers tensed slightly, her pulse drumming in her ears.

 

Was this weird?

 

Was he going to ask her what she was doing?

 

What if he thought she was being creepy?

 

Her thoughts stumbled over themselves, spiraling faster than she could control.

 

But then—before she could overthink herself into oblivion—she felt it.

 

A faint shift beneath her fingertips.

 

N’s hand, after that brief flicker of surprise, slowly—hesitantly—moved beneath hers.

 

Without saying a word, his fingers tentatively curled around hers, gentle and unsure. His grip was faint at first—almost as if he was half-expecting her to pull away.

 

But when she didn’t, he gradually let his hand settle around hers. His palm was warm against her fingers, his touch light, almost uncertain.

 

There was no awkwardness in his expression—no confusion or discomfort. Just a faint, subtle softness in his gaze, almost as if he was surprised but… grateful.

 

Her chest tightened, her breath catching slightly.

 

Her stomach was still knotted with nerves, but the warmth of his hand around hers gradually eased the sharpness of it.

 

Her heart was still pounding, her face faintly warm, but somehow, it didn’t feel as terrifying as she thought it would.

 

She didn’t look at him, not fully. She couldn’t.

 

But she didn’t let go, either.

 

And neither did he.

Notes:

AHHHH

Finally I posted two chapters in one day

Ik I’ve been saying this but I finally had the chance to to

BYE next chapter is tomorrow

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 47: Shut Up

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The small space between them was barely noticeable at first—just enough to make their handhold feel slightly awkward.

 

Uzi’s arm was stretched out ever so slightly, the angle a bit uncomfortable. Her wrist bent at an odd angle, and her fingers strained faintly with the distance.

 

She sat like that for a moment, feeling the subtle tug in her arm, before gradually shifting her weight. She hesitated briefly, her breath catching faintly in her throat.

 

But then, slowly—carefully—she inched herself closer to him. Bit by bit, she moved, barely breathing, as if terrified that the smallest misstep would shatter the fragile sense of ease between them. Her heart hammered steadily against her chest, thudding with sharp, jittery beats.

 

What am I doing?

 

Her entire body felt too warm—her internal temperature climbing as if she were standing too close to an open flame.

 

Why am I doing this?

 

Every inch she closed only made the heat rise further, and for a brief moment, she considered backing off entirely. But then—against her better judgment—she forced herself to stay.

 

Just go with it…

 

Her breath was tight and uneven, and her pulse thudded sharply in her ears. Her movements were subtle but deliberate, gradually shrinking the space between them. By the time she was close enough to ease the strain in her arm, she hesitated again. Her fingers twitched faintly against his, and she could feel how warm his hand was—his palm still lightly curled around hers.

 

The gentle weight of his fingers against her own made her throat tighten slightly, and for a brief second, she second-guessed herself.

 

Should I say something?

 

Is this weird?

 

The thought lingered in her mind—persistent, nagging—and before she could convince herself otherwise, she quietly, hesitantly, broke the silence.

 

“…Is this… okay—?” Her voice was soft, barely audible beneath the sounds of the movie playing. Her words had fumbled slightly as they slipped out, her tongue feeling clumsy and stiff in her mouth.

 

Without thinking, she turned her head ever so slightly, peeking at him through her peripheral vision.

 

And then—before she could process it fully—her eyes met his.

 

Her stomach flipped violently.

 

Her breath hitched faintly in her throat, and she immediately felt the heat rushing to her face. The warm, subtle glow from the TV illuminated the side of N’s face, casting a faint light over the edges of his features.

 

His eyes were calm—soft, even. There was no trace of confusion or discomfort in his expression. No awkwardness. Just a gentle look of quiet surprise—a brief flicker of uncertainty—before his face gradually softened. Her fingers tensed faintly in his grasp, bracing herself.

 

But then, instead of showing any sign of unease, N’s lips parted slightly—and he gave her a soft, sheepish smile. The corners of his mouth lifted ever so faintly, and he nodded once, a light dip of his head.

 

His voice was quiet, breathy even,“Yeah.”

 

His tone was soft—sincere.

 

Uzi’s chest tightened.

 

Her fingers remained loosely curled around his, and she barely managed to suppress the sharp exhale threatening to slip from her lips.

 

Her shoulders sagged faintly in relief.

 

Oh thank robo-god.

 

She wasn’t sure what she had been expecting—maybe for him to look at her weird, or to pull away slightly, or for the moment to become unbearably awkward.

 

But he didn’t.

 

Instead, N glanced away, his eyes shifting quickly back to the movie—his gaze almost a little too fast, like he was suddenly very aware of how long they’d made eye contact. His attention flicked back to the screen, but the sheepish smile lingered faintly on his face.

 

Uzi let out a slow, quiet breath, shifting her gaze back to the TV as well. The slight tension in her chest gradually eased, but her face still felt too warm. Her fingers were trembling faintly from the adrenaline still simmering in her system.

 

That was fine. That was okay.

 

The swirling panic she’d felt moments ago slowly subsided, melting into something softer—he brief tension that had come with the sudden eye contact was gone. Replaced by something gentler—easier.

 

And despite the heat still lingering on her face, she was grateful for it. Without even fully realizing it, Uzi shifted ever so slightly. Her movements were slow and subtle, almost imperceptible.

 

And then—naturally, almost instinctively—she leaned in. Her head dipped gently toward him, the side of her temple softly brushing against his shoulder.

 

And then, with a slow, barely noticeable exhale, she rested her head there. The weight of it pressed lightly against him, and her hair tickled faintly against the fabric of his hoodie. It was effortless—the height difference between them making the gesture fit almost perfectly.

 

She could feel the subtle rise and fall of his breathing beneath her, steady and calm. Physically, there was nothing awkward about it.

 

If anything, the gentle way their frames fit against each other felt almost… natural.

 

Too natural.

 

Uzi’s eyes remained fixed on the screen, unblinking, her expression composed—but internally, she was falling apart. Her entire brain short-circuited the second her head touched his shoulder. Panic slammed into her like a freight train—her entire body stiffening for half a second, the momentary urge to pull back flashing through her limbs.

 

What the hell am I doing?!

 

Her face was on fire. Her hands were clammy, her fingers still faintly curled in his. Her breathing—now painfully aware of itself—became shallow and uneven, making her chest tighten. It was like every warning signal in her mind was flashing at once, red flags flaring violently in her head.

 

Why am I doing this?

 

She didn’t do this kind of thing.

 

She never had.

 

She wasn’t like this. She wasn’t touchy or affectionate. She wasn’t one of those drones who casually leaned on others or rested against them.

 

So why—why—was she doing this now?

 

The very idea of it made her stomach twist violently. Her throat felt tight, and for a fleeting moment, she genuinely thought she might throw up from how overwhelmed she felt.

 

But despite the suffocating swarm of thoughts rushing through her, she didn’t stir.

 

She didn’t move a muscle.

 

She didn’t so much as flinch.

 

Her head remained perfectly still, resting gently against his shoulder. And even though every nerve in her body was screaming at her to recoil, she stayed.

 

Don’t move. Don’t ruin it.

 

Her heart pounded hard against her ribs, practically reverberating in her ears.

 

What if he pulls away?

 

What if he thinks I’m weird?

 

What if he changes his mind?

 

Her throat tightened painfully.

 

She squeezed her eyes shut briefly, silently scolding herself.

 

Stop overthinking it.

 

Her mind was practically spinning in circles, overanalyzing every possible outcome, when suddenly—she felt it.

 

The faintest shift.

 

The subtlest weight.

 

A gentle pressure resting softly against the top of her head.

 

Warm and light.

 

It took her a second to realize what it was.

 

N…

 

Without a word, he had tilted his head, leaning it against hers. The weight was soft—barely there—just the faintest, feathery touch. But the sensation was unmistakable.   It wasn’t heavy or intentional, nor was it hesitant.

 

It was natural—fluid.

 

The motion was so easy, so seamless, it was as if it had simply happened rather than been a conscious choice. Uzi’s breath caught faintly in her throat. Her eyes widened slightly. And suddenly, her internal panic somehow intensified.

 

Her thoughts scrambled and blurred together—everything colliding into a chaotic mess of overanalysis. Her mind spiraled into a rapid series of contradictory thoughts.

 

Wait, what?

 

Oh robo-god.

 

Why does this feel so natural?

 

Why is he doing this?

 

Is this normal?

 

Her face burned hotter, her internal temperature rising again, and she swallowed thickly, her throat feeling unbearably tight. And yet—despite the emotional turmoil practically eating her alive from the inside—her body remained utterly still.

 

She didn’t move.

 

She didn’t flinch.

 

Her muscles remained soft and loose, her head still pressed against his shoulder, perfectly unmoving. Because as disorienting and nerve-wracking as the whole situation was, she knew one thing for certain:

 

She didn’t want to ruin this.

 

Her eyes flicked back toward the movie, her gaze slightly unfocused, barely registering what was happening on the screen. The only thing she was aware of was the subtle warmth of N’s head leaning softly against hers.

 

And despite the fact that her mind was still spiraling in disarray, a small part of her clung tightly to the hope that he wouldn’t move away.

 

Uzi’s breath faltered slightly, her chest tightening as she let out a slow, shaky exhale.

 

She was trying to ground herself—to steady the swirling mess of emotions buzzing relentlessly inside her. Her lungs felt stiff, and the subtle tremor in her breath was barely perceptible—but it was there.

 

She shut her eyes for a fleeting moment, willing herself to settle, her fingers faintly flexing in N’s hand as she struggled to regulate her erratic pulse.

 

But then—suddenly—

 

The warmth was gone.

 

The soft weight of N’s head, which had been so gently resting against hers only seconds before, disappeared.. The absence was immediate—leaving behind nothing but the faintest, ghostly sensation where he’d once been.

 

Uzi’s eyes snapped open.

 

What…?

 

Without even thinking, she stirred slightly, lifting her head as a wave of confusion swept over her. Her gaze drifted toward N, brow furrowing faintly as she glanced at him.

 

He had pulled back.

 

His head no longer rested against hers—and now, he was looking at her.

 

His expression was soft, but tinged with concern. His eyes, which only moments ago had been relaxed and unfocused on the screen, were now searching hers carefully.

 

He parted his lips slightly, then spoke. “…Is something wrong?” His voice was quiet, the words cautious but sincere—a gentle question. His tone was laced with genuine concern, and the subtle crease between his brows only made it more evident.

 

Uzi’s stomach lurched violently, heat flooding her chest.

 

Her throat tightened painfully.

 

Oh no.

 

She felt her hands go clammy, and a wave of lightheadedness washed over her.

 

He noticed.

 

Her breath caught slightly, and before she could fully register what she was doing, she stammered out a response.

 

“N—No…! I’m fine, really—!” She insisted, clumsily, unintentionally sounding unconvincing. Her the words were rushed and uneven, her tone slightly strained—a dead giveaway that she wasn’t fine.

 

And somehow, she knew N could tell.

 

His expression softened faintly—but instead of easing, he looked slightly more unsure. And then—without saying a word—she felt it. The warmth of his fingers began to slip away.

 

Wait—

 

Her heart sank the second she realized what was happening. Slowly, hesitantly, N’s grasp on her hand loosened.

 

His touch—once so steady and warm—began to pull back. Her stomach twisted violently as he moved slightly away from her. And then he spoke again—his voice low and soft, slightly apologetic.

 

“…I can move it you want me to.” The words were gentle and unassuming—spoken with genuine consideration. He wasn’t upset. He wasn’t offended—he was simply giving her the option.

 

An easy out.

 

Uzi’s throat clenched.

 

Her chest tightened so suddenly it nearly took her breath away.

 

No, no, no.

 

Her mind scrambled, frantically searching for a way to fix the moment before it slipped through her fingers completely.

 

And without even thinking, she reacted.

 

Her voice rushed out, far too fast.

 

She cut him off mid-sentence, her words clumsy and uneven.

 

“Seriously— it’s fine…!”

 

In a split second, she forced a smile—a poor attempt at reassurance—but her expression was strained, her lips curving awkwardly. Her voice had come out slightly higher-pitched than she intended, laced with a palpable edge of nervousness.

 

She insisted—far too quickly—that it was fine.

 

Really.

 

She was fine.

 

He didn’t need to move.

 

Her voice sounded more forceful than she meant it to—borderline desperate. The words spilled out in a rushed attempt to stop him from pulling away.

 

She felt a wave of heat crawl up her neck, her entire face burning.

 

And then—before she could overthink it—she moved. Her fingers, still loosely holding his, tightened ever so slightly.

 

And then—impulsively—she shifted closer.

 

Slow and uncertain, she inched toward him by mere inches. The motion was small—barely noticeable—but she felt it. The subtle proximity closed the tiny space between them again.

 

Her hand squeezed his faintly—reassuringly—desperately.

 

As if trying to silently say, Don’t pull away.

 

Her throat was bone dry.

 

Her face was sweltering.

 

Her breath was uneven, but she tried her hardest to mask it. For a fleeting, mortifying moment, she was utterly certain that her entire body language screamed awkward—because it was. Every movement filled with hesitance and second-guessing.

 

Her fingers were trembling faintly in his.

 

I’m such an idiot.

 

She felt exposed—embarrassingly obvious in her flustered state. But despite the awkwardness practically seeping from her every motion, she didn’t move away.

 

She didn’t loosen her grip.

 

Her hand remained in his.

 

Clammy. Unsteady. Anxious.

 

But still there.

 

The space between them—what little of it there was—felt smaller than ever. The gap had slowly but surely dwindled away, reduced to barely a sliver of distance.

 

Too close.

 

Not close enough.

 

She wasn’t sure which thought came first.

 

Her heart was pounding so violently she could feel it in her fingertips—a wild, erratic rhythm thrumming beneath her skin. Her throat was unbearably dry, but she couldn’t swallow. She didn’t dare, because she knew if she did, he would hear it. He would hear how uneven her breathing was—how shaky it had become. How utterly ruined she was by the tension suffocating the space between them.

 

Her eyes—wide and unblinking—were locked with his.

 

And he was still looking at her.

 

He was still looking at her.

 

N’s gaze was soft but unwavering, his eyes steady and gentle, holding hers without the slightest hesitation.

 

He didn’t look away.

 

Not once.

 

And that only made it worse.

 

Uzi could feel it now—could practically feel the warmth of his breath faintly fanning against her face. It was subtle—barely there—but somehow it made the whole thing infinitely more unbearable. Her chest tightened further, suffocatingly so. The subtle shift in the distance—the slight lean—was almost imperceptible at first.

 

But she felt it.

 

The faint pull, drawing her forward.

 

She wasn’t even sure if it was her own doing.

 

Or if N was leaning in too.

 

Or maybe they both were.

 

She didn’t know.

 

All she knew was that she was moving—slowly, thoughtlessly—without even realizing it. The space between them was dwindling rapidly. Her eyes were half-lidded, her breath shallow.

 

Am I actually going to—

 

But she couldn’t.

 

She couldn’t do this.

 

The realization slammed into her like a cold, unforgiving wave.

 

Her stomach dropped violently, and before she could even register the impulse, she jerked back. She turned her head away abruptly, her breath trembling.

 

Her hands shot up instinctively, grasping the edges of the blanket still draped over her. She yanked it up and over her face, burying herself beneath the fabric.

 

Her voice slipped out before she could stop it—a strained, exasperated groan of defeat.

 

“I can’t do this.” The words came out slightly muffled from behind the blanket, but the frustration in her tone was unmistakable. Her voice was barely above a murmur—frayed at the edges—unsteady.

 

But it was there.

 

And it was pathetic.

 

N shifted slightly, and Uzi felt him draw in a faint, shallow breath next to her. Her eyes squeezed shut tighter, already bracing herself. She could feel it coming—the subtle intake of air that signaled he was about to say something. His voice started softly—a hesitant murmur, barely more than a breath.

 

“Uzi, I—”

 

But she didn’t let him finish. Her voice cut through his instantly—low, strained, and hoarse from the knot tightening in her throat.

 

“Shut up.”

Notes:

I edited this chapter like really fast so let me know if there’s any typos or anything that doesn’t make sense 😭🤚

Next chapter is tomorrowwww stay tuned for then

EDIT: I changed up some of the wording at the end cuz it didn’t make sense for what’s gonna happen next. Js reread the last part, if that’s alright- mb 😭

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 48: Sweltering

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The words came out sharper than she intended—firm and sudden, a little too loud in the hushed stillness of the room. The moment they left her lips, she felt her stomach plummet slightly.

 

Jeez, why did I say it like that?!

 

Her voice had cracked faintly over the words—unsteady but unintentionally forceful. It wasn’t meant to be demanding—it wasn’t meant to be cruel.

 

But she didn’t care—she couldn’t care.

 

Not right now.

 

She just needed him to be quiet.

 

Just for a moment.

 

Because if she heard his voice—if he spoke even a single word—she was going to break. She wasn’t ready to process it, not yet. She could still feel the erratic thudding of her heart, violently slamming against her chest.

 

But then, he shifted again. Her entire body tensed under the blanket, silently pleading that he would say nothing, and just act like everything was fine. Like she wasn’t being  completely and totally awkward right now.

 

Yet, sure enough—

 

He spoke up.

 

Her heart clenched violently when she heard his voice.

 

Soft. Worried.

 

Immediately apologetic.

 

“I-I’m sorry—”

 

His words came out in a breathless rush, slightly frantic, voice breaking slightly at the start. His hand, which had still been loosely resting beneath the blanket with hers, pulled back slightly. His entire body shifted as if he were already preparing to move.

 

“It’s my fault—I’ll just—” His voice was tight with guilt, flustered and breathless as he fumbled to pull away. “I’ll move—”

 

No.

 

Her breath hitched sharply. Her stomach plummeted violently, a knee-jerk pang of dread seizing her chest.

 

No, no, no.

 

I don’t want you to move.

 

Her thoughts were practically screaming at her, frantic and clawing against the inside of her skull. Her hands twitched slightly beneath the blanket, fingers trembling violently with the sudden surge of emotion. Her entire body was practically thrumming with the urge to reach for him.

 

Do something.

 

Don’t let him move.

 

And then—impulsively, almost desperately—she did.

 

The moment she felt him begin to shift further away, she bolted. Her hands shot out from beneath the blanket without thinking. Fingers trembling, she lunged forward. Her hands found his shoulders—gripping them with far more urgency than she intended. Her knuckles turned faintly white, clutching at the fabric of his hoodie with an almost desperate hold.

 

And before she could even process what she was doing— She buried herself against him. Without hesitation, she pressed herself forward—tucking her face into the soft fabric of his hoodie. Her forehead brushed against the hollow of his neck, and the side of her face pressed faintly against his collarbone.

 

The motion was hasty—impulsive—and trembling with vulnerability. She clung to him, her breath uneven and sharp, fingers still bunched in the material of his hoodie.

 

She spoke up, and her voice was muffled against his chest—quiet, slightly hoarse, but unmistakably pleading.

 

“Don’t move.”

 

The words slipped out in a breathless murmur, her voice still trembling faintly. There was a slight, unsteady crack in her tone—almost imperceptible, but there. The vulnerability clung to her tone, soft and pleading.

 

She squeezed her eyes shut tightly, as though willing herself to disappear. Her throat was dry—her face was practically sweltering—her entire body stiff with mortification.

 

What am I doing?!

 

Her hands trembled ever so slightly, clinging to him as though letting go would shatter her completely. Her breath was uneven, slightly shaky against the fabric of his hoodie.

 

She wanted to pull away.

 

She wanted to retreat—to backpedal from her impulsive, reckless display of emotion.

 

But she didn’t.

 

Her limbs felt leaden, her grip unmoving—she couldn’t bring herself to let go.

 

And even though her thoughts were screaming—telling her that she was being irrational, that she was going to make this so much worse—she still didn’t move. Her fingers only tightened further against the fabric of his hoodie.

 

And she stayed.

 

Her hands, still clutching the fabric of his hoodie, continued to tremble faintly from the sheer adrenaline flooding her system.

 

Her face was still buried against his collarbone, and she pressed herself against him tighter, as though trying to drown herself in the fabric—to disappear.

 

What is happening. Why is this happening?

 

Her thoughts spiraled violently, clawing at the edges of her mind, disjointed and frantic.

 

And what the actual hell do I think I’m doing?!

 

What if he thinks I’m a complete psychopath?

 

Her stomach twisted violently with the wave of uncertainty crashing over her. Her breath was slightly uneven, still shaky against the fabric of his hoodie.

 

What happens now?

 

What do I even do after this?

 

What if I just ruined everything?

 

Her limbs felt weak with the weight of her own spiraling thoughts, still clutching at his hoodie with trembling fingers. But before she could plummet deeper into the sinking pit of overthinking—

 

She felt him shift slightly. The subtle motion was faint but unmistakable.

 

Her breath caught violently in her throat. For a brief, suffocating moment—she was convinced he was about to pull away—to push her off of him.

 

And why wouldn’t he?

 

If their positions were reversed, she probably, no, definitely would’ve shoved him off by now.

 

But he didn’t.

 

He didn’t. 

 

Instead—slowly, cautiously—she felt him lean in ever so slightly.

 

Then, she felt it.

 

A pair of arms—tentative and slow—hesitantly wrapping around her. Her breath hitched faintly, heart lodging itself in her throat. His movements were uncertain, slow and searching, as though bracing for rejection, as though he wasn’t sure if it was okay.

 

The embrace was loose at first—unsteady and unsure—like he was half-expecting her to pull away at any moment.

 

But she didn’t.

 

She couldn’t.

 

Her entire body stilled, breath catching faintly against his chest. Then—gradually—she felt his hold on her tighten. With a slow, cautious motion, his arms drew her in fully. He pulled her against him, encircling her in a proper embrace.

 

The warmth of his frame enveloped her completely—the faint hum of his internal systems barely perceptible beneath the fabric of his hoodie. Her face was still buried against his collarbone, and she could feel the subtle shift of his chest with each slow, steady breath he took.

 

And then—

 

Without warning—

 

She felt his hand slowly lift.

 

For a brief moment, she stiffened, unsure of what he was doing. But then—gently—she felt the weight of his palm settle against the back of her head. The touch was delicate—light and tender.

 

His fingers brushed against her hair with a featherlight caress, barely skimming over the strands at first. But then—slowly—his fingers began to move.

 

Soft.

 

Unhurried.

 

Tentative.

 

They slid gently through her hair, fingertips gliding down in a slow, languid motion.

 

He was stroking her hair.

 

Uzi’s breath stilled.

 

Her entire body went rigid for a moment—completely blindsided by the gesture. Her heart clenched violently in her chest, fingers trembling slightly in the fabric of his hoodie. She was stunned—momentarily frozen in disbelief.

 

He’s actually—

 

Is he seriously—

 

But the moment the initial shock passed—her entire body slackened. She exhaled faintly against his chest, the tension bleeding from her limbs. The warm, rhythmic motion of his fingers running through her hair was disarming—soothing in a way she hadn’t expected. It was so gentle—delicate and reverent—as though he were afraid he might somehow hurt her.

 

She couldn’t help but melt slightly at the sensation, her fingers unclenching from his hoodie. Her face remained hidden in the fabric, her breath still uneven but gradually slowing, gradually calming.

 

She didn’t dare move.

 

Didn’t dare breathe too deeply.

 

Didn’t dare do anything that might make him stop.

 

And as he continued the slow, deliberate motion—threading his fingers through her hair with that same gentle reverence—she closed her eyes.

 

And she stayed there.

 

Pressed against him.

 

Listening to the faint, steady hum of his systems. Feeling the warmth of his frame against hers. And melting into the gentle rhythm of his fingers combing slowly through her hair.

 

Uzi exhaled slowly, a faint shudder in her breath as it slipped out unevenly. Then, her hands slid back, drifting from his shoulders—though she didn’t pull away.

 

Not even for a second.

 

Instead—without thinking—she let herself give in fully. She allowed her arms to slip over his shoulders behind him. And before she could even second-guess the action, she wrapped them around him.

 

Fully.

 

Completely.

 

Her arms circled his frame, holding him in a proper embrace.

 

She shifted slightly, leaning into him further, and without hesitation, she let her chin come to rest lightly on his shoulder.

 

Her eyes fluttered shut.

 

She released a slow, silent breath against the fabric of his hoodie, and for the first time since this entire night began—she let herself relax.

 

Just for a moment.

 

Just for a little longer.

 

She didn’t want to think anymore—didn’t want to feel the tightness in her chest or the mess in her head—didn’t want to wrestle with the disorienting confusion swirling inside her.

 

She just wanted to stay like this.

 

Just for a while.

 

The warmth of his frame pressed against hers, the faint hum of his internal systems purring softly, the steady rhythm of his breathing—it was soothing.

 

It was grounding.

 

She could stay like this forever.

 

But then—

 

Her fleeting moment of peace was broken. N’s voice sounded softly beside her, low and uncertain.

 

“Are you… okay with this?”

 

The words were gentle—a careful murmur, unsure, almost fragile. There was no weight in them, no pressure—just a tentative, genuine uncertainty.

 

Uzi stilled faintly, her breath halting slightly at the question. For a brief moment, she didn’t answer.

 

Didn’t move.

 

Didn’t breathe.

 

The only sound between them was the faint sounds of the TV still playing in the background, long since ignored.

 

Finally, she exhaled softly against his shoulder. Her voice was barely above a murmur—low and quiet.

 

“I guess.”

 

The words scraped roughly against her throat, dry and gravelly from the rawness still lingering there. There was a brief silence after her answer—a heavy pause that stretched between them.

 

And then, she spoke again.

 

Her voice came out softer this time—a low, uneven whisper.

 

“I don’t…” She hesitated, eyes unfocused against the fabric of his hoodie. “…I don’t know how to feel.”

 

The admission slipped out before she could stop it. Her fingers unconsciously tightened slightly against the fabric of his hoodie as the words lingered faintly in the air.

 

And then, silence again.

 

For a long moment, neither of them spoke. She remained still against him, unmoving, unsure of whether she even wanted him to respond.

 

And then, finally—

 

His voice returned, quiet but steady.

 

“You don’t have to.”

 

Her brow furrowed. Her arms remained draped around him, but her grip slackened slightly. Her eyes blinked open, confused, though she still didn’t pull away.

 

She tilted her head faintly, voice barely a breath.

 

“…What?”

 

N exhaled softly—a slow, measured breath against her shoulder. And then, gently—reassuringly—he repeated himself.

 

“You don’t have to know how to feel.”

 

His voice was quieter this time, almost a whisper.

 

“You just have to… feel.”

 

The words lingered in the space between them, gentle and unassuming. There was no push, no pressure, no expectation. Just a simple, honest reassurance.

 

Uzi didn’t respond.

 

She didn’t need to.

 

Because she understood.

 

In a strange, unspoken way—she understood what he meant. She didn’t have to make sense of this. Didn’t have to pick it apart and analyze it. Didn’t have to hold it up to the light and inspect it for flaws.

 

She didn’t have to make it logical—or coherent—or even understandable.

 

She just had to let herself feel it.

 

Even if it was confusing.

 

Even if it was messy.

 

Even if it made no sense at all.

 

She didn’t have to figure it out tonight. She could just… let herself be. So—without a word—she simply hugged him a little tighter. Her arms, still wrapped around him, pulled him in a fraction closer.

 

Her eyes fluttered shut once more, and she pressed herself into him slightly, feeling the faint warmth of his frame seep into hers.

 

And she let herself feel it.

 

Fully.

 

Completely.

 

Without thinking.

 

Without questioning.

 

Without needing to understand it.

 

Just for now.

 

Just for this moment.

 

She simply stayed there—holding him a little closer—letting the warmth settle into her chest and ease the ache, even if only for a little while.

 

For a long, quiet minute, Uzi remained still—pressed against N’s frame, her arms still loosely draped around him, she simply… stayed.

 

She didn’t move.

 

Didn’t stir.

 

She just savored the moment.

 

Letting herself sink into it.

 

Letting herself feel the warmth of him against her.

 

Letting herself breathe.

 

Her eyes remained shut as she clung to the rare stillness—the strange comfort of simply existing in this fleeting space with him. But gradually—slowly—a quiet tension began to rise in her chest.

 

It was faint at first—a subtle, nagging weight tightening just beneath her sternum. But the longer she stayed still—the longer she remained pressed against him—the more it grew.

 

Her thoughts drifted back to his words.

 

You just have to… feel.

 

She exhaled softly, her breath feathering faintly against him.

 

She understood what he meant—at least, in theory. But how? How was she supposed to just feel? How was she supposed to turn off the noise in her head and just be?

 

Her throat tightened faintly.

 

She released another slow, quiet sigh against his shoulder, the tension lingering stubbornly in her chest.

 

Her eyes fluttered open slightly. And then—slowly, tentatively—she shifted. Without pulling away, she tilted her head faintly to the side, her cheek now resting against his shoulder. Her movements were slow—careful—almost hesitant.

 

Her gaze lowered slightly, her eyes half-lidded as she found herself staring at the space where her face rested near his neck.

 

Close.

 

Very close.

 

She could feel the faint warmth radiating off of him. The heat of his frame seemed to bleed into her skin—seeping into her face, her chest, her entire being.

 

Without meaning to, her eyes flickered shut again, and she released a slow, uneven breath against him. Her lips parted faintly, her breathing shallow as she hovered there, the warmth of his neck practically right against her mouth.

 

You just have to… feel.

 

The words continued to echo faintly in her mind.

 

Soft.

 

Steady.

 

Undemanding.

 

She hesitated.

 

Her hands tightened against his back, the fabric of his hoodie subtly bunching beneath her grip. Her heart stuttered slightly.

 

And then—

 

Without giving herself a chance to overthink it—

 

She leaned in.

 

Slow.

 

Soft.

 

Barely even there.

 

And she pressed a gentle kiss to the side of his neck.

 

For a fleeting moment, nothing happened.

 

But then—

 

She felt N’s breath catch faintly.

 

His frame stilled slightly beneath her.

 

His chest briefly halted in its steady rise and fall, the slight intake of breath sharp and audible. He froze beneath her touch—not stiffly, not tensely—but with a faint, startled stillness.

 

She remained there for a brief second, her lips still barely brushing against the smooth plating of his neck. Then, slowly, she pulled back just slightly, letting the faintest smile tug at her lips.

 

The subtle hitch in his breath, the way his chest had stilled ever so briefly—it sent an amused warmth curling faintly in her chest. The corners of her mouth lifted slightly.

 

And before she could stop herself, she leaned in again. Once more, her lips brushed softly against the side of his neck.

 

Another featherlight kiss.

 

Then another.

 

And another.

 

The motions were slow—gentle and unhurried—deliberately drawn out, as if she was carefully savoring each one. Each time her lips pressed against his neck, she could feel the faintest tensing of his frame beneath her.

 

Not from discomfort—

 

But from something far softer.

 

He was warm against her, his breath uneven in the faintest, most subtle way—and he wasn’t pulling away.

 

So—slowly, gradually—she let her lips drift.

 

Trailing upward.

 

Slow and languid.

 

Her mouth brushed softly against the line of his jaw, lingering there for a moment. She felt him exhale quietly—a faint, shaky breath against her hair—and she smiled softly against his skin. She pressed another soft kiss to his jaw.

 

And then, gently, she let her lips trace along the edge of it—slowly, subtly—until she reached his cheek. Without pausing, she pressed another soft kiss there.

 

And then—finally—she stilled.

 

She didn’t kiss him on the lips.

 

Didn’t push further.

 

Instead, she shifted slightly, letting her forehead softly press against his. Her movements slowed—still and gentle. Her lips parted ever so slightly, her breath still shaky and uneven as it ghosted softly against his face.

 

And then—hesitantly—she opened her eyes.

 

And she found his waiting there.

 

She was close enough to see the softness in his gaze—the gentle warmth lingering faintly in his eyes.

 

And then—slowly, softly—he smiled.

 

A quiet, genuine smile.

 

Warm.

 

Soft.

 

Slightly breathless.

 

The faintest quirk of his lips, subtle and tender. And just like that—she felt her own smile widen faintly in response. He shut his eyes again, and she took this as a cue to closed her eyes, too. But instead of forcibly squeezing them shut, wanting to disappear like before, she closed them softly, savoring the moment.

 

Her chest softened, her breathing slowed slightly, and the tension that had been coiling in her chest eased just a little.

 

Because in that moment—she didn’t have to think. She didn’t have to question, didn’t have to figure out how she felt.

 

She simply let herself feel it.

 

And for once—she let herself hold onto it.

 

Without warning, Uzi slowly pulled back.

 

Her arms, which had been loosely draped around N, began to slip away, her grip on him loosening.

 

The warmth of him—the steady pressure of his frame pressed against hers—gradually fell away as she eased herself back, creating a faint space between them. Her breathing was still uneven, her chest subtly rising and falling, but she forced herself to steady it.

 

When she finally opened her eyes, she was met with his.

 

For a brief moment, N’s expression was continuing to be soft—his gaze still warm and slightly dazed, his lips faintly parted.

 

But then, she caught it—the almost imperceptible shift.

 

The slight faltering of his smile.

 

The faint dip in his expression.

 

Subtle.

 

Barely there.

 

But she noticed.

 

His eyes flickered open fully, the sleepy haze in his eyes sharpening slightly with quiet uncertainty.

 

Still holding eye contact, Uzi felt her throat tighten. Without even thinking, she spoke, the words forming before she could fully process them.

 

“Do you… like me?”

 

She barely registered the trembling uncertainty in her tone, yet still she spoke softly, hesitantly. Her voice was barely above a whisper, her words fragile and unsure.

 

The moment they left her lips, she wasn’t even certain where they had come from. The question seemed to spill out of her almost impulsively—unplanned, unfiltered—her own thoughts barely able to keep pace with it.

 

Her hands, which had fallen to her lap, curled faintly into the fabric of her pajama pants, her fingers tightening subtly.

 

The room felt impossibly still.

 

N’s eyes widened faintly at her question.

 

He blinked once, then again, the warmth in his expression subtly giving way to uncertainty. For a fleeting moment, he seemed caught off guard—his gaze flickering slightly, lips parting as if to speak.

 

But no words came.

 

Instead, he hesitated.

 

Stumbled slightly.

 

Then, with a faint, uneven breath, he answered.

 

“…I—I think so.”

 

His voice was low—quiet and uncertain, barely above a murmur. It wavered faintly, the words coming out haltingly, unsure of themselves. His brows knit slightly, and his eyes flickered away briefly, seeming as if he wasn’t sure there was a right answer. The quiet vulnerability in his voice lingered in the air—unsteady but sincere.

 

Uzi’s gaze lingered on him. Her eyes narrowed, and she tilted her head slightly. When she spoke up, her voice was softer this time—but still laced with a faint edge of skepticism.

 

“…Don’t you like V?”

 

Her tone was quiet, but the question came with a slight weight—a subtle challenge behind her words. Her gaze remained fixed on him, watching him carefully.

 

At the mention of V, N stilled slightly. For a brief moment, his expression was unreadable—a faint flicker of something unfamiliar crossing his face.

 

He didn’t answer right away.

 

Instead, he seemed to be mulling over her words—his eyes drifting downward slightly, brows knitting. The brief pause hung between them—heavy, but fleeting.

 

And then—without much thought—he answered.

 

“…I did.”

 

His voice was quiet, steady—but barely above a whisper. He exhaled softly, as if forcing the words out—his eyes still lowered slightly. But after a brief pause, he continued. His voice came slower this time—softer, more hesitant.

 

“…I just… I’m not so sure anymore.”

 

The confession was barely audible—a faint, quiet murmur, as though he wasn’t certain he should be saying it out loud.

 

His eyes flickered back to hers, faint uncertainty lingering in his gaze. The room was still, the only sound continuing to be the faint, low hum of the TV in the background.

 

And yet—to Uzi—it felt deafening.

 

Her chest tightened, her hands still lightly curled in the fabric of her pants. As much as her mind wanted to keep racing—grasping for answers, for certainty—there was nothing left to say.

 

There was only the quiet weight of his voice lingering in the space between them.   

Notes:

AHIHSBENTOAJNEOW

posting the next chapter today 🤭

They’re actually so sweet I love it like I wanna cry

Literally situationship goals (in this very specific instance cuz usually it’s not this good ig 💔)

AHHHH ok I don’t have anything else to say BYE

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 49: Just feel

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

You just have to… feel.

 

The words continued to echo faintly in Uzi’s mind, their weight lingering in the back of her thoughts.

 

And for once—she listened.

 

She let her breath steady—slow and measured.

 

Let the tension in her chest ease—just slightly.

 

And without another thought, she lifted her hand.

 

Slowly.

 

Deliberately.

 

Her fingers hovered for only a brief moment before she pressed her palm softly against the side of N’s face, cupping his cheek with a featherlight touch.

 

She could feel the faint warmth of him against her skin—the delicate sensation of smooth plating meeting the gentleness of her fingertips.

 

N blinked once, caught off guard by the sudden contact. But then—his eyes softened. His lips parted faintly, and a small, bashful smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.

 

The soft amber glow of his eyes lowered slightly, his gaze briefly flickering downward in a sheepish glance. The subtle shift in his expression—the faint curve of his smile—was unmistakable.

 

He was blushing.

 

Without a word, he slowly leaned into her palm. The motion was gentle, almost instinctive—the subtle weight of him melting into her touch. The warmth of him pressing lightly against her hand was grounding—tangible and real.

 

Uzi’s eyes softened. Her thumb—almost without thinking—began to move. She slowly brushed it back and forth against his cheek, drawing slow, deliberate strokes over the smooth surface.

 

Soft.

 

Tender.

 

The gentle motion was almost absentminded—her hand moving entirely on instinct. And as she did, she could feel the tension that had once clung to him—frail and fragile—begin to ease.

 

The slight tension in his frame slowly melted away as he pressed further into her palm, eyes half-lidded. The small, bashful smile remained—soft and genuine.

 

And in that moment, Uzi didn’t want to think. Didn’t want to analyze. Didn’t want to overthink every word and every action.

 

She just wanted to feel.

 

Before she could stop herself—before her thoughts could catch up—she leaned in.

 

Her eyes flickered briefly to his lips—just once—before she closed the distance. And with the faintest intake of breath, she pressed a gentle, fleeting kiss against him.

 

Soft.

 

Tentative.

 

Barely there.

 

But she felt the slight intake of breath from him—the subtle hitch of surprise in his chest. N responded instinctively—his lips parting faintly, leaning into her.

 

But before he could deepen it—before he could follow—she was already pulling back.

 

The kiss barely lingered.

 

Like a soft brush of warmth before it was gone—leaving only the faint impression in its place. Uzi’s eyes slowly opened again, her gaze meeting his.

 

For a moment, she just looked at him. He seemed confused, his brows furrowing, as if he thought he did something wrong. But then—with her voice barely above a whisper—she spoke.

 

“I think… I like you too.”

 

Her voice was soft—slightly hoarse, as though the words caught faintly in her throat.

 

But there was no hesitation.

 

No overthinking.

 

Just honesty.

 

N’s eyes widened slightly at her words—a faint, stunned blink. But then, the corners of his lips slowly curled upward. The faintest breathless laugh fell from him—a disbelieving but utterly genuine sound.

 

The warmth in his expression softened, and he smiled—broad and unmistakably genuine, eyes practically gleaming. And then—before she could fully register it—he was leaning in.

 

Slow and steady.

 

No hesitation.

 

And this time—it was him who kissed her.

 

The contact was soft—tentative but certain. And for the briefest moment, she could feel it—the faintest curve of his lips against hers.

 

Smiling.

 

But the gentle, amused warmth quickly melted into something softer. The kiss lingered, slow and unhurried—delicate and steady, with no trace of urgency.

 

Like they had all the time in the world.

 

Uzi’s chest tightened—the warmth spreading through her threatening to overwhelm her.

 

But she didn’t pull away.

 

Instead, she moved.

 

Her other hand lifted slowly, almost instinctively. And with delicate care, she placed it against his other cheek, cupping his face fully. Her fingers gently traced along the subtle curve of his jawline, holding him with faint, deliberate pressure.

 

And then—slowly—she pulled him closer.

 

N responded without hesitation, leaning into her hands, his frame melting against hers. The warmth of him—the way he fit against her—felt impossibly natural.

 

Familiar.

 

Her hands trembled faintly against his skin, but she didn’t loosen her grip. Instead, she deepened the kiss ever so slightly—her lips moving softly against his, slow and gentle.

 

No thoughts.

 

No hesitation.

 

Just feeling.

 

And for once—Uzi didn’t want it to stop.

 

Slowly—so slowly that Uzi barely registered the shift at first—she felt N’s arm move. The slightest, subtle shift in his weight as his hand brushed along her side.

 

And then—tentatively—she felt it.

 

The gentle, steady warmth of his arm wrapping securely around her waist.

 

Careful.

 

Measured.

 

He didn’t pull—didn’t tug her closer—he simply rested his arm there, holding her with a delicate, almost protective stillness. The sensation was grounding—the faint weight of his arm over her waist bringing her back into the moment.

 

Just like last time.

 

The thought flickered in her mind—the memory of that moment flashing briefly behind her eyes.

 

But unlike before, they weren’t pressed together in a cramped, suffocating closet. There was no disorienting darkness—no paranoia weighing heavily on her chest—no lingering tension threatening to choke the air from her lungs.

 

Here—it was warm.

 

Soft.

 

Safe.

 

The difference settled in her chest—a faint warmth replacing what had once been gnawing dread.

 

And with that realization—something in her eased. She slowly—deliberately—scooted closer to him.

 

Bit by bit.

 

Closing the subtle distance between them until her frame was pressed softly against his. The warmth of him bled through his hoodie—the faint, tangible heat settling against her chest. The steady, rhythmic rise and fall of his breathing pressed against her own, their movements falling into the same slow, unhurried rhythm.

 

Without a word, she let her hand slip from his face. Her fingertips glided softly downward—skimming along his jawline before settling on his shoulder.

 

And with delicate, almost instinctive ease, she shifted her arm, draping it loosely around his back. Her palm pressed softly against him—a half-embrace.

 

Loose.

 

Comfortable.

 

Familiar.

 

But she kept her other hand where it was—still holding his face with gentle, steady warmth. Her thumb moved of its own accord, brushing faint, aimless shapes against his skin. Soft, absentminded strokes traced along the sharp edge of his jawline—small, slow patterns drawn with a featherlight touch.

 

And she felt it.

 

The way his breath stuttered faintly against her lips. His chest rose slightly more sharply against hers—the sudden intake of breath barely perceptible but undeniable.

 

For a brief moment—he froze.

 

A faint, breathless tremor caught in his throat. But then—after a beat—he inhaled softly, drawing in a steady, grounding breath.

 

And he kept going.

 

Neither of them pulled away.

 

Neither of them hesitated.

 

They simply melted further into each other—kissing slow and deliberate, savoring every lingering brush of their lips.

 

There was no urgency—no rush.

 

Just warmth.

 

Soft and unhurried.

 

Their hands slowly roamed in quiet exploration—hands tracing over fabric with a gentle but reverent pressure. Like they were still memorizing each other—soft and steady, as though again, they had all the time in the world. And with each fleeting press of their lips, Uzi felt herself sink further and further into him.

 

Into the steady warmth of his hold.

 

Into the faint shiver in his breath.

 

Into the quiet, trembling softness of the way he kissed her back—like he never wanted it to end.

 

Without warning, N slowly pulled away. The sudden shift made Uzi blink, momentarily disoriented. For a brief, breathless moment, she simply stared at him—her expression barely masked with confusion.

 

But before she could say anything—before she could even process the loss of warmth—she felt it. The faintest brush of his lips against her jawline.

 

Featherlight.

 

Barely there.

 

But unmistakable.

 

Her breath caught.

 

Her heart lurched into her throat as he lingered there, his lips grazing softly over the sharp edge of her jaw. And then—slowly—he began trailing downward, moving with a careful, deliberate reverence. His lips brushed along the soft curve beneath her jaw, then skimmed over the faint slope of her neck.

 

Unhurried.

 

Gentle.

 

Each kiss was slow and lingering—the warmth of his breath caressing her skin with every subtle exhale.

 

Oh.

 

Uzi’s thoughts slammed to a stuttering halt—her mind hazy and unfocused. She had just done this to him mere moments ago—had pressed her lips along his neck, her heart pounding the entire time.

 

But now that the roles were reversed—

 

She was melting.

 

Melting.

 

Her entire frame felt warm—her chest tightening with a strange, unfamiliar pressure she couldn’t name.

 

She couldn’t breathe.

 

Literally.

 

Without realizing it, she had held her breath the moment his lips made contact with her neck. Her lungs seized, refusing to expand—her body tensing slightly under his touch.

 

She didn’t know how to react—didn’t know how to handle this. It was different when she was the one leading—when she was the one kissing him.

 

But this—

 

This was something else entirely.

 

Her fingers twitched faintly against the fabric of his hoodie—grasping at it as though trying to ground herself.

 

But it wasn’t enough.

 

Because then—

 

She felt the faintest press of his teeth against her skin.

 

Not painful.

 

Not even remotely.

 

But just firm enough that she felt it.

 

A soft, fleeting bite near the crook of her neck and shoulder.

 

And Uzi shivered.

 

Hard.

 

The sensation shot through her spine like a spark—the slightest, fleeting shock that had her breath leaving her in a ragged, startled exhale. Her throat clenched slightly as she gasped—her breath shuddering faintly as it left her lips.

 

She stilled.

 

Eyes wide.

 

Pulse thundering violently in her chest.

 

It wasn’t the bite itself—it was the fact that he had done it.

 

So unprompted.

 

So natural.

 

Like it was instinct.

 

Like he couldn’t not do it.

 

Her entire body flushed with heat, the warmth pooling in her chest and rising rapidly to her face. The sensation burned under her plating—slow and spreading, like molten metal beneath her skin.

 

And then he kissed her again.

 

Soft.

 

Slow.

 

Tender.

 

The warm press of his lips trailed faintly along her neck, punctuated by the occasional, teasing scrape of his teeth. Every now and then—he would repeat the motion.

 

A soft bite.

 

Then a kiss.

 

And she could feel his breath with every exhale—faint puffs of warmth against her skin—his breathing slow and steady, rhythmic and measured. And somehow—that was what made it worse.

 

Because he wasn’t hurried.

 

He wasn’t rushed or reckless.

 

He was calm.

 

Deliberate.

 

Steady.

 

And it drove her insane.

 

She squeezed her eyes shut, biting back a shaky exhale as she tried—and failed—to contain the overwhelming heat flooding through her chest. Her fingers flexed slightly where they gripped the fabric of his hoodie.

 

And without thinking—her hands clutched at the material. Her grip tightened faintly—clinging to him in an unspoken plea.

 

And without a word, she pulled him closer.

 

A soft tug.

 

Subtle—but firm.

 

Her arms instinctively cinched around him in a tighter hug—desperate to feel him closer, to anchor herself against him as the heat continued to build.

 

And he didn’t resist.

 

He let her pull him in.

 

Let her cling to him with trembling fingers. Let her grip at him like she was afraid he might slip away. And as he pressed another slow, deliberate kiss to her neck, Uzi couldn’t hold back the faint shiver that ran through her—her entire frame trembling faintly in his hold.

 

Her thoughts were nothing but static.

 

No words.

 

No coherent processing.

 

Just heat.

 

Faint, featherlight sensations against her skin. And the steady, grounding warmth of N pressed against her in her arms. Her throat tightened. She needed to say something—anything—just to ground herself, just to remind herself that she still could.

 

So she did.

 

“…N.”

 

His name slipped past her lips—a faint, fragile murmur.

 

Barely audible.

 

Soft.

 

Shaky.

 

Her voice was unsteady—slightly breathless, barely more than a whisper.

 

But the moment he heard it, he stilled. Immediately, she felt the slow, deliberate press of his lips against her neck halt—the warmth of his breath lingering faintly in its place.

 

Slowly, N brought his head back up. His movements were gradual, almost cautious—like he was hesitant to break the contact entirely.

 

And then—he made eye contact with her again. His golden eyes, half-lidded and unfocused only moments ago, now sharpened faintly with a flicker of concern.

 

Subtle—but there.

 

His brow creased ever so slightly.

 

His gaze softened.

 

And the moment his eyes met hers, his lips parted faintly.

 

“Hmm?” His voice was low—breathy and quiet. Barely above a murmur. Still warm from the haze of moments prior, but noticeably gentler now.

 

A subtle, questioning hum.

 

Then, after a brief pause, he asked softly,

 

“…What’s up?” The concern was barely noticeable in his tone—but Uzi caught it immediately.

 

The slight edge of uncertainty, as if he was quietly wondering if he had done something wrong.

 

If she was okay.

 

If this was still okay.

 

Her throat tightened slightly at the realization. But she shook her head faintly, her eyes lowering slightly. She was quick to dismiss the silent worry in his voice.

 

“It’s nothing…” she murmured softly, her voice barely louder than a breath. And without giving him time to respond, she leaned forward again—closing the small distance between them.

 

She pressed her lips to his in a slow, deliberate kiss. And just like that—she felt his lips curve faintly into a soft smile against hers once more. It was subtle—just the faintest upward tug. But she felt it.

 

She lingered there—just for a moment.

 

And then, just as gently, she pulled back. Her eyes fluttered open, only to find him smiling softly at her—his expression relaxed, soft, and quietly content. A warmth pooled in her chest at the sight.

 

But she didn’t speak—not immediately. Instead, she simply pressed her forehead against his—her movements slow and tentative. Her eyes softened as she leaned into him.

 

And then, in a quiet murmur, she finally whispered, “…I’m tired.”

 

Her voice was soft.

 

Hushed.

 

Low and breathless—barely louder than a tired exhale. But she didn’t sound reluctant or disappointed.

 

Just calm.

 

Steady.

 

Almost… relieved.

 

And at her words, N let out a faint breath of his own—a soft, low chuckle slipping past his lips.

 

It wasn’t loud.

 

Barely louder than a sigh.

 

But it was warm.

 

And fond.

 

And tired.

 

“…Me too.” His voice was still slightly hushed—low and soft, as if he were sharing a secret.

 

There was no hesitation in his words.

 

Just quiet contentment.

 

A soft smile tugged faintly at the corners of his lips—a weary, breathless grin that made his eyes crease faintly with warmth.

 

And then, after a brief pause, Uzi slowly pulled away. The shift was subtle—unhurried. She let her arms slip from around him, her hands falling away from his hoodie as she moved.

 

Then—without a word—she shifted herself beside him. Her back pressed against the headboard of her bed as she settled into place.

 

The blanket she had discarded moments ago now lay rumpled and bunched around her waist. Her fingers instinctively curled around the fabric, tugging it upward again.

 

Slowly, she draped the blanket back over herself—tucking it loosely around her frame. The soft weight of it was familiar—comfortable.

 

But it wasn’t enough.

 

Because the moment she pulled the blanket over herself, she hesitated. Her eyes drifted toward N, still seated beside her.

 

Without thinking—without second-guessing—she moved. Slowly, she turned toward him. And—almost cautiously—she wrapped her arms around him.

 

Her hands slipped around his back in a loose, lazy half-embrace.

 

No hesitation.

 

No overthinking.

 

Just… feeling.

 

Her chin came to rest softly against his shoulder—the fabric of his hoodie brushing faintly against her face. And as she let her weight lean into him slightly, she felt it.

 

The warmth of his arms wrapping around her in return. Gentle and grounding. His movements were just as unhurried. There was no rush—no uncertainty. Just a quiet, steady embrace.

 

And then—softly, almost hesitantly—he took her hand. One of her arms remained loosely wrapped around him, but the other—he carefully lifted her hand from his back, cradling it in his own.

 

Slow.

 

Tender.

 

His fingers curled gently around hers—his thumb brushing faintly over her knuckles.

 

Reassuring.

 

Grounding.

 

And the moment their hands intertwined, Uzi felt her entire frame slowly begin to relax—her tense limbs softening slightly under his touch. Her breaths, once shallow and uneven, slowly steadied into a calm, even rhythm.

 

And as she closed her eyes, she let herself sink into the warmth of him—the steady, reassuring presence of his arms around her and his hand in hers.

 

And for the first time in a long while—

 

She let herself breathe.

 

Her eyes grew heavy. Gradually—slowly but surely—the soft haze of sleep began to weigh down on her.

 

Her limbs felt looser.

 

Heavier.

 

Sluggish.

 

Her body softened faintly against N’s—her frame sinking ever so slightly into his embrace. And with each slow, steady breath she took, she could feel her awareness fading little by little.

 

The room around her blurred faintly at the edges—the low flicker of the TV screen and the faint hum of the speakers fading into the background. The sound of the movie was nothing more than a dull, distant murmur—background noise, hazy and insignificant.

 

Instead, all she felt was him.

 

The steady warmth of his arms around her. The faint, almost absentminded brush of his thumb over her knuckles. The gentle, rhythmic rise and fall of his chest beneath her touch.

 

It was warm.

 

Steady.

 

And oddly… safe.

 

Safe.

 

The realization was subtle, barely even a conscious thought—just a distant, fleeting feeling that lingered faintly in the back of her mind.

 

But it was there.

 

The quiet, unfamiliar warmth of comfort.

 

Of being at ease.

 

Of being… safe.

 

And for the first time in what felt like forever—she didn’t feel the need to be on edge. She didn’t feel the faint hum of restlessness in her chest. She didn’t feel that ever-present knot of tension she was so used to carrying.

 

She just… felt.

 

Warm.

 

And heavy.

 

And tired.

 

Her fingers, still loosely entwined with his, slackened faintly. Her grip softened ever so slightly as her breathing slowed—her chest rising and falling in a calm, steady rhythm. And she was moments—seconds—from dozing off completely when she suddenly heard it.

 

A voice.

 

Low.

 

Soft.

 

Hushed.

 

Barely above a whisper.

 

“Goodnight…” N’s voice was warm—breathless and slightly weary, but gentle—barely more than an exhale.

 

Quiet.

 

And almost… reverent.

 

Like he was speaking softly on purpose.

 

Like he was afraid to disturb her.

 

Or maybe—like he was quietly savoring the words themselves.

 

Savoring the moment.

 

And for a second, she stirred faintly at the sound. Her eyes fluttered open slightly—a hazy blur of blue light and muted shadows filling her vision. She blinked slowly, her eyelids heavy with sleep, before tilting her head slightly. And—still half-lidded and foggy with exhaustion—she murmured softly in return,

 

“…Goodnight.” Her voice was faint—slurred slightly with drowsiness.

 

Quiet.

 

And barely coherent.

 

But warm.

 

Soft.

 

And the moment the word left her lips, she shifted slightly—her limbs moving sluggishly under the weight of sleep. Her arms tightened slightly around N. A slow, lazy squeeze—her arms drawing him a bit closer.

 

Instinctively.

 

Unconsciously.

 

She barely even registered the movement—her mind too foggy with sleep to process it.

 

But she did it anyway.

 

Clutching onto him just a little tighter.

 

Holding him just a little closer.

 

As if she were hugging something familiar.

 

Something warm.

 

Something… safe.

 

And slowly, she shifted her head against his shoulder—nuzzling slightly into the fabric of his hoodie. Trying to get just a bit more comfortable. Her breath left her in a slow, heavy exhale against the fabric—a long, tired sigh that she hadn’t realized she’d been holding in. And as she stilled—her head tucked against him, her fingers lightly curled around the fabric of his hoodie—she felt it.

 

The warmth of him.

 

The steady, rhythmic thrum of his frame.

 

The calm, quiet rise and fall of his chest.

 

And with that—the last faint threads of wakefulness slipped away entirely.

 

Slowly.

 

Gently.

 

Quietly.

 

And before she could even fully register the warmth of his arms or the steady beat of his pulse—

 

She drifted off.

 

Into a soft, dreamless sleep.

Notes:

OH EM GEEEEE

FINALLY

A good kiss scene where neither of them have to stress abt anything 💔 this is so fluffy and intimate I love it

Idk if this is tmi abt my personal life, but I haven’t been intimate with someone like this in almost a year now and I’m actually gonna die 😭🥲 IT’S SO BAD LIKE WHAT even robots have more game than me ig 💔🥀

LMAO ANYWAYS enough abt me, I have actual news

VERY IMPORTANT from now on, I’m not gonna post on Sundays. I js need at least one day of the week where I can catch up on writing, this was I don’t gotta stress abt the possibility of having my posting schedule be halted. Ik it’s been kinda weird recently but like I saw the Minecraft movie twice and have js been busy with school so I didn’t have the chance to post LMAO 💀💀

Oh and also spoilers but not spoilers (subtle foreshadowing?) but who knows if this is gonna last and everything’s gonna turn out fine? Maybe it will, maybe it won’t, who knows 🤔 not me apparently

We’ll js have to wait till the next chapter(s) 😈

Can’t have it all js be fluff, right?

ANYWAYS next chapter is being posted Monday. Stay tuned!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 50: Morning

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

When Uzi’s eyes fluttered open, the soft haze of morning light filtered faintly through the slats of her blinds, casting thin, pale streaks of gold and white across her room.

 

For a moment, she simply laid there—her body heavy with the sluggishness of sleep, still cocooned in the warmth of her blankets. Her face was partially buried into the fabric of her pillow, her limbs tangled lazily beneath the layers of covers.

 

She exhaled slowly—a groggy, faintly muffled sound—before shifting slightly, rolling onto her side. Her eyes—half-lidded with exhaustion—landed on the faint green glow of her alarm clock.

 

10:48 AM.

 

Uzi groaned softly.

 

Too early.

 

Way too early.

 

Her eyelids drooped once more—slowly slipping shut as her breath left her in a slow, heavy sigh. She let herself sink deeper into the warmth of her blankets, tugging them a bit higher around her shoulders.

 

Her mind was foggy—still clouded with the haze of sleep. And for a fleeting moment, she was content to simply drift back off—back into the heavy, quiet embrace of slumber.

 

But then—

 

It hit her.

 

Suddenly, without warning, a surge of clarity jolted through her chest. Her eyes snapped open—wide, sharp, and alert.

 

And before she even had time to fully register why—her thoughts were already racing.

 

Last night.

 

Her breath caught in her throat.

 

Last night.

 

With N.

 

The warmth of his arms around her.

 

The gentle weight of his head against hers.

 

The soft brush of his lips against her skin.

 

The warmth of his breath as he held her close.

 

The sound of his voice—low, soft, and breathless—wishing her goodnight.

 

It all flooded back at once.

 

All of it.

 

Clear and vivid.

 

As if it had just happened moments ago.

 

Her stomach twisted.

 

Her chest fluttered slightly.

 

And before she even realized what she was doing, she was pushing herself up—her hands gripping the blanket loosely as she sat up in bed. Her gaze darted across the room.

 

Searching.

 

Looking.

 

But—

 

Nothing.

 

No sign of him.

 

Her bed was empty.

 

No lingering warmth beside her.

 

No trace of him.

 

As if he had never been there at all.

 

Her brows furrowed.

 

…What?

 

Her gaze shifted around the room once more. Her nightstand—her chair—her desk—her floor.

 

Yet, there was nothing.

 

No sign of him anywhere.

 

And slowly, a creeping, hollow weight settled in her chest. Her fingers curled subtly around the blanket, gripping the fabric loosely as her breath stilled.

 

Was… was that just a dream?

 

Her stomach clenched at the thought. The warmth—the tenderness of his touch—the soft sound of his voice—

 

Had none of it been real?   

 

The hollow weight in her chest expanded slightly. She slowly drew her arms around herself, pulling her knees toward her chest.

 

Her limbs felt heavier.

 

Her skin was cold.

 

A strange, dull sense of unease settled faintly in her gut—a quiet, hollow ache that she couldn’t quite place.

 

Had she just imagined it?

 

Had her mind just conjured up some strange, fleeting fantasy—some half-formed illusion born of exhaustion and longing?

 

For a brief, fleeting moment—she felt a strange, creeping disappointment stirring faintly in her chest.

 

But then—

 

A faint, familiar sound.

 

Soft.

 

Rhythmic.

 

Running water.

 

Uzi’s breath caught. Her head snapped up, her eyes wide. And suddenly—she noticed the faint glow of warm light filtering through the narrow gap at the bottom of her bathroom door. Her gaze locked onto the thin sliver of golden light.

 

She stared.

 

The faint, steady sound of the faucet running filled the quiet—the faint, muffled shift of movement just beyond the door. And slowly—just barely visible—she caught sight of it.

 

A shadow.

 

Dark and blurred beneath the crack of the door.

 

Shifting.

 

Moving faintly.

 

A figure.

 

Him.

 

Her breath left her in a slow, shaky exhale. Her arms, still loosely wrapped around herself, slackened slightly. And she blinked slowly—once, twice—her mind catching up with reality.

 

Oh.

 

He’s still here.

 

The tension in her chest unraveled slightly, and her shoulders somewhat sank in relief, fingers loosening their grip on the blanket. And gradually, her breathing steadied once more.

 

Her stomach still felt twisted—her limbs still felt a bit heavy—her chest still fluttered with the residual haze of confusion. But the weight of uncertainty—the faint, hollow ache—slowly ebbed away. And instead, a quiet warmth stirred faintly in its place.

 

Soft.

 

Subtle.

 

And barely noticeable.

 

But there.

 

And slowly—steadily—her gaze remained fixed on the faint shadow beyond the door.

 

And she waited.

 

Her breath slow.

 

Her limbs heavy.

 

And her heart—quiet.

 

But steady.

 

Uzi slowly uncurled her arms from around herself, the tension in her chest loosening slightly as she exhaled. Her limbs still felt a bit heavy—sluggish from sleep and the lingering haze of confusion—but she forced herself to move.

 

With a soft shuffle, she scooted back slightly on the mattress, pressing her back against the headboard. The cold surface sent a faint shiver down her spine, but she ignored it.

 

Instead, she focused on getting comfortable, shifting slightly beneath the tangle of blankets. Her hand absently tugged one of the thicker blankets around her shoulders, wrapping herself in it like a cocoon.

 

The fabric was soft and heavy, pressing warmly against her skin. She burrowed into it slightly, tucking her chin into the blanket’s folds, letting the residual warmth linger against her cheeks.

 

Her eyes remained fixed on the faint sliver of golden light glowing from beneath the bathroom door. The sound of water was still running—a steady, rhythmic trickle against the porcelain sink. Her breathing slowed. There wasn’t much else to do but wait.

 

So she did.

 

The faint hum of the faucet filled the quiet.

 

And she waited.

 

Seconds ticked by slowly—her chest tightening faintly with the anticipation that she couldn’t quite seem to shake. Her fingers curled loosely around the edge of her blanket, her thumb absently brushing along the fabric.

 

Then—

 

The faucet turned off, and t he sound of running water stilled.   

 

And she stared.

 

Her eyes remained locked on the door.

 

Her pulse quickened slightly.

 

Then—

 

The knob shifted.

 

Slowly.

 

Her breath stilled.

 

And she watched as the door eased open with a faint, barely audible click. The warm light of the bathroom spilled softly into the room.

 

And N stepped out.

 

He didn’t look at her at first. His gaze was distant—unfocused. He seemed lost in thought, his brows faintly furrowed, his eyes downcast as he absently dried his hands on the hem of his hoodie.

 

Uzi stared at him. Her breath still held in her chest. Her fingers tightened around the blanket.

 

She didn’t move.

 

Then—

 

He looked up.

 

And their eyes met. For a brief, fleeting moment—everything seemed to still. Her breath hitched slightly.

 

But then—

 

N smiled. A soft—shy—almost sheepish smile. It was subtle—the faintest upward curve of his lips, barely there—but unmistakably genuine.

 

And despite the warmth suddenly flooding her chest, Uzi barely noticed the sharp breath that slipped softly from her lips.

 

“Good morning.”

 

His voice was low, quiet—still slightly rough from sleep. Gentle—unassuming—but warm. And somehow, impossibly, that made her chest tighten even more.

 

Her head was still somewhat spinning from everything that had happened. But somehow—her lips parted slightly, her voice barely above a breath.

 

“…Good morning.” Her tone was soft, almost dazed—barely audible as she spoke. Her voice caught faintly at the end, breathless and unsteady.

 

She was still processing everything. Still trying to make sense of the lingering warmth in her chest—the ghost of his touch still faintly lingering against her skin. And yet—she couldn’t tear her eyes away from him.

 

N stayed for a moment, his gaze flickering softly over her. And for a brief second, she thought he might climb back onto the bed.

 

That he might pull her into his arms again.

 

That they might simply settle back into the warmth they’d shared last night.

 

But instead—

 

He hesitated.

 

And then he quietly crossed the room, moving toward the swivel chair positioned near the desk that was next to her bed. Without a word, he sat down. His movements were slow—almost cautious—as if unsure whether he should keep his distance. He turned toward her slightly in the chair, his hands loosely resting against his lap.

 

And then—neither of them spoke.

 

An unmistakable silence filled the room.

 

Yet, Uzi’s gaze held onto him. Even though her mind still foggy, her eyes remained locked on him.

 

N kept his gaze low, his eyes occasionally flickering toward hers—only to glance away again just as quickly. Until finally, his gaze settled on hers.

 

And neither of them broke the silence in that moment.

 

But despite the quiet—despite the strange tension that lingered in the space between them—neither of them seemed to wanted to fully look away.

 

And Uzi…

 

She wasn’t sure what she was supposed to feel. Her chest still felt heavy with a strange, lingering warmth. And somehow, despite everything, she still felt like she was floating—half caught in the haze of last night, half anchored to the present.

 

But she didn’t look away.

 

And neither did he.

 

And for now…

 

That was enough.

 

N was the first to break the heavy, lingering silence between them. When he spoke, his voice was quiet, slightly raspy—still rough from sleep—but unmistakably uncertain.

 

At first, he stammered slightly over his words, as if struggling to figure out how to phrase what he wanted to say. His eyes that had been locked with hers quickly flicked away again, his gaze dropping slightly. His hand absently fidgeted with the hem of his hoodie, nervously toying with the fabric.

 

Finally, after a brief pause, he spoke.

 

“…Did all of that actually happen?”

Notes:

Wowowoowowowo

I wonder what’s gonna happen next 🤔

AHH anyways, this was great. I don’t like the writing in this chapter as much as the last one, but it’s gonna get better soon.

Next chapter will be posted tomorrow 🫶

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 51: Recollection

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

N’s voice was hesitant—almost disbelieving—as if he wasn’t entirely sure he could trust his own memory. His brows furrowed slightly as he glanced at her, his eyes searching hers for some sort of confirmation.

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard by the question. She stared at him for a moment, feeling her stomach drop.

 

What?

 

Her lips parted slightly, but she didn’t respond right away, her eyes narrowing in confusion.

 

How could he have forgotten?

 

But then, suddenly, realization struck.

 

Oh…

 

Her breath caught softly in her throat.

 

He had been high…

 

Her heart sank—the warmth in her chest, the lingering haze of last night—the tenderness they had shared—it all suddenly felt as though it was being yanked out from under her.

 

Her fingers curled slightly into the blanket, clutching the fabric a little tighter. She suddenly felt… small. Uzi’s eyes lowered slightly as a faint, sinking weight pressed against her chest.

 

Did he only do any of that because he was high?

 

Her stomach twisted sharply at the thought.

 

Did he not actually like her?

 

Was it all just some stupid, drug-fueled mistake?

 

Her lips pressed together, deep in thought. She could feel the heat rushing to her face—not the pleasant warmth from last night, but something heavier, duller.

 

Her pulse fluttered faintly in her ears as she exhaled softly through her nose, trying to keep her voice steady.

 

Then, cautiously, she finally spoke. “Do you…” Her voice was quiet—faintly hoarse, barely above a breath. She swallowed subtly. “Do you remember anything?” Her words were hesitant, and she hated the faint vulnerability in her tone. Her fingers tightened slightly around the edge of the blanket, her knuckles subtly tensing.

 

N’s eyes lingered on hers for a moment, his gaze faintly flickering with uncertainty. He furrowed his brows slightly, as if trying to think.

 

His lips parted, but no words came at first. She could see the faint creases forming between his eyes—the way his hand absently rubbed at the back of his neck, as though trying to pull at some distant, hazy memory.

 

Finally, he answered.

 

“…I think so.” His voice was quiet—slightly unsure. He glanced at her briefly, but his eyes didn’t linger long before lowering slightly, almost sheepishly.

 

Uzi’s heart skipped faintly in her chest. Her breath stilled slightly as she hesitated for a moment. Her fingers curled tighter around the fabric of her blanket, the weight in her chest slightly heavier.

 

Then, her voice barely above a whisper, she asked.

 

“…What do you remember?”

 

Her words were soft—cautious—barely above a breath. Her eyes remained locked on him, watching carefully as he processed her question.

 

N’s gaze drifted slightly, his brows furrowed faintly in concentration. She could see the subtle creases in his forehead as he tried to pull the hazy fragments of memory from the fog clouding his thoughts.

 

He glanced away slightly, staring somewhere near the floor, his lips parting as he slowly began to speak. “I…” He trailed off, his voice low, thoughtful. “…I remember at the party… everyone was playing ‘7 minutes in heaven.’”

 

His eyes flickered slightly as he spoke, as though visualizing the scene in his mind. His voice was slow, deliberate—carefully recalling each vague detail.

 

“Then… I ate a brownie,” he added, his voice quiet, slightly uncertain. His eyes narrowed faintly, his brows drawing slightly as he searched for the next piece of the memory.

 

“…And then everything just kinda… started looking weird.” His voice trailed off at the end, his expression clouding slightly with confusion. He shifted subtly in his chair, his hand fidgeting faintly with the hem of his hoodie again.

 

Uzi said nothing—her eyes remaining locked on him, listening carefully, intently. Her fingers clutched the blanket a little tighter, holding her breath slightly without realizing it.

 

N was quiet for a moment, his eyes flickering in thought.

 

Then—slowly—he continued.

 

“…I remember being in a closet next,” he admitted, his voice softer this time, slightly cautious. His eyes glanced at her faintly, as if uncertain whether he was remembering that part right.

 

But then he hesitated, his lips pressing together slightly. “…I don’t remember if I… said anything,” he added, his voice trailing off slightly. His brows furrowed again, his eyes lowering slightly.

 

Uzi’s breath caught softly in her chest. Her hands remained still—slightly tense—against the fabric of her blanket. And for a moment, she wasn’t sure whether she wanted to ask him the next question.

 

But she did.

 

Her voice was hesitant, barely above a whisper. “…Do you remember anything that happened in the closet?”

 

Her throat was dry. Her words were faint—careful, uncertain. Her heart was pounding faintly against her ribs, though she did her best to ignore it. She held her breath slightly as she waited for his answer.

 

N’s gaze lowered slightly. He was quiet for a moment, his eyes distant. Then, slowly, he shook his head.

 

“…Not really,” he admitted softly, his voice quiet—almost apologetic.

 

His eyes lingered on the floor, his hand fidgeting slightly with the fabric of his hoodie again. Then, after a brief pause, he added cautiously, “I… vaguely do.”

 

His voice was low, uncertain—as though unsure whether the scattered fragments of memory he was clinging to were real or imagined.

 

His eyes flickered slightly, glancing at her—uncertain, searching. And despite herself, she wasn’t entirely sure if she wanted to hear what he would say next.

 

Uzi hesitated briefly before speaking, her voice quiet, uncertain. Her fingers subtly tightened around the blanket in her lap, gripping the fabric lightly.

 

Her throat was still faintly dry, and she had to clear it softly before asking,“…What about after that?”

 

Her voice was soft—hesitant—laced with a faint, nervous edge. She kept her eyes on him, carefully watching his face.

 

N blinked once, slowly, as though her question had caught him slightly off guard. His brows furrowed again, and he lowered his gaze slightly, his eyes distant.

 

She could see the subtle crease forming between his brows as he tried to think—tried to remember. His lips parted slightly, but no words came at first.

 

For a moment, his fingers fidgeted faintly with the fabric of his hoodie again, absently rubbing the hem between his thumb and forefinger. Then, after a brief pause, he finally spoke.

 

“…I remember…” he trailed off faintly, his voice slow, thoughtful.

 

He glanced at her briefly, but his eyes quickly drifted away again, as if trying to piece together the blurry fragments in his mind.

 

“…I think I wanted to drive home,” he admitted softly, his tone laced with faint uncertainty.

 

His eyes lowered slightly, his expression subtly clouding.

 

“But…” His brows knit faintly as he stared distantly at nothing in particular, searching for the next memory.

 

“Somehow I… ended up on a bus?” His voice lilted upward slightly at the end, as if unsure whether he was remembering that part correctly. He glanced at her briefly, his eyes subtly questioning—uncertain.

 

Uzi’s lips parted slightly. Her fingers curled faintly into the fabric of her blanket, her chest tightening faintly at his words. For a brief moment, she was surprised that he hadn’t remembered how he ended up on the bus.

 

But then she realized…

 

Of course he wouldn’t remember that part.

 

She drew in a subtle breath and exhaled softly. Her voice was quiet, almost cautious, as she slowly explained. “…I asked you if you wanted to stay the night at my place.” Her words were soft—deliberate—slightly hesitant.

 

She glanced at him, her voice careful. “You were high,” she added softly, her tone laced with quiet concern. Her fingers subtly tightened around the fabric in her lap.

 

“I didn’t want you to drive, so… you agreed. Her voice trailed off faintly, almost unsure, her eyes flickering over him carefully.

 

For a moment, N was quiet.

 

His brows furrowed, his eyes subtly narrowing in thought. And then, slowly, she saw the subtle shift in his expression. The faint crease in his forehead eased slightly as his eyes widened faintly with realization.

 

His lips parted slightly, as though the hazy memory was gradually clicking into place. She could see it in his face—the faint flicker of familiarity.

 

A soft, almost sheepish smile tugged at the corner of his lips. “…Oh,” he muttered softly, almost under his breath. His voice was quiet, slightly dazed, as though only now fully registering what had happened.

 

He let out a soft, faintly disbelieving breath,“Yeah…” he added quietly, his voice slightly sheepish. “I remember that.” His eyes lifted to hers, and he smiled faintly, albeit a bit awkwardly. But then, slowly, the faint smile faded. He hesitated for a brief moment, his eyes lowering subtly.

 

When he spoke, his voice was softer this time, more subdued. “…Thank you.” His tone was quiet—sincere. He glanced at her again, his eyes subtly flickering with faint gratitude. “For… not letting me drive,” he added softly.

 

His voice was faint—slightly tentative, as though the weight of the realization was just now fully settling in.

 

He let out a soft, uneven breath. “I…” His voice faltered faintly, trailing off slightly. His eyes drifted downward, his expression subtly clouding. His voice lowered faintly, almost a whisper. “…I don’t even know what could’ve happened if I did.”

 

His words were quiet—slightly shaken. His fingers subtly tightened around the hem of his hoodie, fidgeting. He exhaled softly through his nose, his eyes lowering slightly. For a brief moment, he seemed to lose himself in the thought, his expression faintly clouded.

 

Uzi’s breath stilled slightly. She felt a dull ache in her chest at his words—a subtle, sinking weight. The mere thought of him driving home in the state he had been in made her stomach twist.

 

What if she hadn’t asked him to come with her?

 

What if he had actually driven home?

 

What if he had crashed?

 

What if…

 

She shut her eyes for a brief moment, forcing the thought away. Her lips pressed together in thought. She drew in a slow, steady breath, trying to ground herself.

 

Then, a faint wave of relief settled in her chest. She was grateful—so, so grateful—that he was here.

 

Safe.

 

Beside her.

 

She swallowed softly, exhaling quietly through her nose. For a moment, she was quiet, letting the lingering tension in her chest slowly fade.

 

Then, softly, she spoke.

 

Her voice was low—cautious, careful.

 

“…What do you remember next?” Her eyes lingered on him, watching carefully, intently. Her voice was faint—steady, but subtly laced with a quiet, cautious anticipation.

 

N’s eyes narrowed faintly in thought. For a moment, he was silent, his expression slightly distant as he tried to sift through the haze of his memories.

 

He exhaled softly through his nose, his lips parting faintly. Then, after a brief pause, he finally spoke.

 

“…I remember getting off the bus,” he murmured softly, his voice slow—thoughtful. His eyes flickered slightly upward, as though mentally retracing his steps.

 

“And… walking with you,” he added quietly. His voice remained low, slightly tentative—almost as if he was still piecing it together as he spoke.

 

His eyes drifted back to her, meeting hers briefly. “To your house,” he clarified softly, his voice steady but faintly uncertain, as though still confirming the accuracy of his recollection.

 

His gaze lingered on her for a beat, searching her expression, but then he glanced away slightly, his eyes lowering subtly. His brows knit faintly once again, and he pressed his lips together in thought.

 

“…After that,” he continued softly, his voice trailing slightly. He paused briefly, his eyes lowering in contemplation.

 

Then, quietly, he added, “…It’s… a bit clearer.” His voice was faint—slightly hesitant, but more certain now. He lifted his eyes to her again, his gaze softer now. There was a brief moment of stillness.

 

Then, almost imperceptibly, Uzi’s breath hitched faintly in her chest.

 

“…clearer .”

 

Her pulse quickened faintly.

 

Did that mean…

 

Her throat tightened slightly. Her fingers curled subtly into the blanket, gripping it lightly.

 

Did he…

 

Did he remember all of it? Or the rest, at least?

 

She stared at him carefully, intently, watching his face for any subtle signs—for any indication of what exactly he remembered.


For a moment, her throat was dry, and she couldn’t seem to form any words. Her lips parted faintly, but she hesitated. Then, slowly, cautiously, she forced herself to speak. Her voice was soft—tentative. “…Then what?” She kept her words were barely above a whisper. Her eyes remained on him, watching carefully, searching his face.

 

N’s eyes lingered on her for a beat. But then, slowly, his expression subtly shifted. His lips parted faintly, but he didn’t speak right away. Instead, his eyes lowered slightly.

 

He exhaled softly through his nose, and for a brief moment, he seemed to be lost in thought again—sifting carefully through the foggy remnants of the night before.

 

But then…

 

She saw it.

 

The faintest, fleeting flicker in his eyes.

 

A subtle tension in his posture.

 

His expression grew slightly rigid, and he glanced away quickly, as if on instinct. A faint, almost imperceptible flush spread across his face. It wasn’t dramatic—barely noticeable at first—but it was definitely there. The pale glow of his faceplate subtly darkened near his cheeks.

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed faintly, her breath catching subtly.

 

That reaction.

 

He definitely remembered.

 

He let out a faint, uneven breath. His hand absently reached up, rubbing at the back of his neck, his fingers brushing through his slightly tousled hair.

 

He still wasn’t looking at her. When he finally spoke, his voice was quieter—slightly uneven. “…I, um…” His words were slow, stilted—slightly awkward. He cleared his throat.

 

Then, his hand fell back to his lap, and his fingers fidgeted slightly, lightly tugging at the hem of his hoodie. “…I remember…” He hesitated as he spoke.

 

Then, slowly, his eyes flickered back toward her. “…A lot more after that.” His voice was barely above a murmur. His eyes lingered on hers for only a fleeting moment before quickly averting again.

 

His face was slightly redder now, the faint flush deepening subtly. He rubbed the back of his neck again, his fingers brushing absently against the edge of his hairline.

 

His lips pressed together faintly, and he swallowed softly. There was a subtle tension in his shoulders, and he avoided meeting her eyes for too long, his gaze flickering downward slightly.

 

Uzi’s breath stilled faintly in her chest. Her fingers tightened around the blanket again, the fabric bunching slightly in her grip. A faint warmth crept up her neck, and she felt her face heat slightly.

 

Her eyes lowered briefly.

 

He remembered.

 

He had to.

 

Most, if not all of it.

 

Her grip subtly loosened on the blanket as she lowered her hands slightly, her fingers lightly grazing the fabric. Her chest felt oddly light and heavy at the same time—an unfamiliar weightlessness clashing with a faint twinge of apprehension.

 

She could feel her face growing warmer, heat pooling in her cheeks.

 

And suddenly… Her thoughts began to spiral.

 

Wait.

 

Her chest tightened.

 

He was flustered.

 

Her breath caught slightly.

 

Was he… embarrassed?

 

Her fingers fidgeted subtly against the blanket.

 

Was he uncomfortable with all of it?

 

Her throat grew dry.

 

Did he not want any of it?

 

Was it only because he was high?

 

Her stomach twisted with anxiety.

 

Was that why he had gone along with it?

 

Her lips pressed together slightly and she swallowed softly. Her chest felt slightly heavier now, the weight sinking into her ribs.

 

Her breath faltered subtly.

 

What if he hadn’t actually wanted any of that?

 

She stared at him for a brief moment, her eyes searching his face, but he still wasn’t looking at her. Her fingers curled slightly against the fabric in her lap.

 

A faint knot tightened in her chest. Her throat was dryer now, and she had to clear it quietly before she spoke. Her voice was soft—slightly unsure, almost reluctant.

 

“…Was that…”

 

The words caught in her throat. She glanced away faintly, swallowing softly. Then, softly—cautiously—she tried again.

 

“…Was that okay?”

 

Her voice was barely above a whisper. Her eyes lingered on him cautiously, her breath faintly still in her chest. She could feel her pulse quickening as she waited for him to respond.

 

For a long, drawn-out moment, the room was utterly still.

 

N kept his eyes lowered for several beats, his gaze fixed somewhere near the edge of Uzi’s blanket, his fingers lightly fidgeting with the fabric of his hoodie. The subtle flush lingering on his face was still present—his expression slightly unsure, almost timid.

 

But then… slowly, hesitantly, his eyes lifted. His gaze flickered back to hers.

 

His lips parted, and for a brief moment, he seemed to hesitate—his voice seemingly catching in his throat.

 

Then, quietly, he exhaled. With a small, almost imperceptible nod, he spoke.

 

“Y–…Yeah…”

 

His voice was soft—barely above a whisper. It was slightly uneven, the faintest trace of nervousness still clinging to it, but it was steady.

 

He gave a small, almost sheepish nod as if reassuring her. His lips parted again faintly, but he hesitated for a brief moment, his eyes lingering on hers.

 

Then, softly, he added,

 

“…It was okay.”

 

His voice was quiet—slightly breathless, almost like he was still processing the weight of his own words. But there was no uncertainty in them.

 

The faintest, almost bashful smile tugged at the corner of his mouth—subtle, but genuine. His eyes lingered on hers for a moment longer before lowering slightly once again, his fingers intertwining with each other.

 

The subtle warmth in his voice—the gentle softness—made Uzi’s breath catch in her chest. Her eyes widened slightly, just for a fleeting second.

 

And then, without realizing it, she let out a faint, shaky breath she hadn’t even known she’d been holding.

 

Her shoulders subtly relaxed, and she felt her chest loosen slightly, as if some invisible weight she hadn’t even been aware of was suddenly lifted.

 

It was strange—it wasn’t like she had been actively expecting him to say otherwise… But now that she knew—now that she had heard him confirm it with his own voice—she felt an unfamiliar wave of relief wash over her.

 

The faintest, unsteady exhale slipped from her lips, barely audible. She stared at him for a moment longer, unsure of what to say. Her throat felt oddly tight—her chest light and heavy all at once.

 

He was okay with it.

 

He was okay with everything that happened.   

 

Just then, she was painfully aware of just how much she had been needing to hear that.

 

For a brief moment, she didn’t say anything. She simply watched him quietly, her eyes lingering on his face. The room was still again—the faint hum of the air around them filling the quiet.

 

Then, after a long moment…

 

N’s voice cut through the silence again. Soft—slightly hesitant.

 

“…I should probably get going now.” His voice was gentle—calm, but slightly subdued. There was no trace of reluctance or discomfort in his tone. No indication that he was deflecting or trying to avoid anything.

 

It was simply… matter-of-fact.

 

A natural end to the conversation.

 

He gave a small, almost apologetic smile, his eyes soft, but he didn’t move right away. For a brief moment, Uzi remained still.

 

She didn’t say anything at first, her chest feeling oddly tight again, but not in a painful way—it was just… there. The sudden, inevitable sense of finality to the moment made her feel just a bit more tense.

 

She blinked slowly, processing his words. Then, finally, she gave a small, subtle nod.

 

Her movements were slow and deliberate as she carefully untangled herself from the blanket, letting the fabric fall from her shoulders. She shifted her legs over the side of the bed and slowly pushed herself up.

 

Her limbs felt slightly stiff from sitting for so long, and she exhaled faintly, steadying herself. As she stood, she let out a small, steady breath, almost as if she were trying to ground herself.

 

Her eyes flickered briefly toward N, who was still seated in her desk chair, his gaze slightly lowered. Her chest still felt light—strangely warm, but slightly unsteady.

 

He was leaving.

 

There was no reason for it to feel so significant, but somehow, it did. Her fingers lightly brushed over the fabric of her hoodie sleeves as she shifted her weight slightly from one foot to the other.

 

Her thoughts were still slightly scattered, her chest still slightly tight, but…

 

She wasn’t worried anymore.

 

He remembered.

 

And he was okay with it.

 

That was enough.

Notes:

Finallyyy an answer to if he remembered or not

Idk if anyone’s thinking this but like, if anyone’s wondering how tf that lasted so long *and* he forgot some of his memory, I think I’ve mentioned it before but if it’s a high enough ‘dose’ of that shit, it’s gonna actually fuck u up sm like it’s actually so bad 😭

It’s like, right after u take it, it feels like nothings happening right? Then it’s like u fell asleep and only remember fragments of stuff that happened, like it was a dream. But the stuff that was like a dream was literally real life and u don’t remember shit 😭🤚

But when it starts wearing off it’s better ig, and u remember way more. That’s the best way I can think to explain what happened, and considering this was literally his first trip and it wasn’t a small amount, it was like, right on the border of being a bad trip but he got lucky ig 💔

LMAO anyways, super excited to post the next chapters cuz I have a lot of ideas on where to go. I had writers block like the past week but it’s finally getting better, so I don’t think I’ll have any issues with the posting schedule (since I’m not behind on future chapters?) and I’m trying to post these earlier in the day so I actually have the time to.

I’m gonna be so honest, I really wanna get this fic done cuz I have a great idea for a different one I wanna do (it’s not gonna be another murder drones fic, I’ve been really wanting to make a TBHK fic with my otp 😫 not gonna say what it is though cuz yeah 🤭) BUT just cuz of that, that doesn’t mean I’m gonna slack off or rush this fic. I honestly don’t know when this one is gonna end cuz I have a lot more planned, like one *major* thing I want to happen hasn’t even happened yet, and I can’t js skip to it cuz pacing is important!! UGHH idk. So ig overall I’m js ‘going with the flow’ or wtv tf. This one will end eventually but idk if that’ll be soon

I’m kinda js rambling but I mean I might as well cuz that has been on my mind a lot recently

Next chapter will be posted tomorrow like usual. Bye!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 52: Door

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi glanced at N once more, feeling the faintest tug of a bittersweet warmth in her chest. Quietly, she waited for him to stand.

 

N slowly pushed himself up from the desk chair. The faint scrape of the legs against the wooden floor was the only sound that broke the heavy, weighted silence.

 

Without saying a word, he turned and walked toward the bedroom door, his footsteps soft but deliberate.

 

Uzi quietly followed him.

 

Neither of them spoke.

 

The silence that filled the space wasn’t uncomfortable—there was no tension, no lingering awkwardness between them.

 

But still… Uzi felt it gnawing at her. The quiet, heavy absence of words made her chest feel oddly tight. The weight of it pressed against her ribs—not suffocating, but still… constricting. There was nothing wrong with the silence itself—it was natural, almost peaceful.

 

But the part of her that didn’t want this moment to end—didn’t want him to leave—made it feel heavier.

 

More hollow.

 

More final.

 

Her arms hung loosely at her sides, her footsteps slow and slightly hesitant as she trailed a step or two behind him.

 

When they reached the front door of her house, she quietly stepped past him, moving ahead to unlock it. Her hand brushed against the cool metal of the lock, her fingers curling around it.

 

But before she turned it, she paused.

 

She glanced at him over her shoulder.

 

Her throat felt oddly tight again. For a brief moment, she opened her mouth slightly—then hesitated. The words for whatever reason became caught in her throat.

 

But the moment stretched on just long enough for her to push through it. When she spoke, her voice came out slightly softer than she intended. “…Do you know where the bus stop is?”

 

Her eyes flickered to his briefly, hesitant but hopeful. “…And… do you know which stop you need to get off at to go back to Lizzy’s house? Y’know… to get your car?” Her voice was quiet—slightly subdued, but casual.

 

She knew the question was mostly unnecessary. The bus stop wasn’t hard to find, and he could easily look up the route.

 

But she asked anyway.

 

She didn’t want to say nothing.

 

N blinked once, seeming slightly surprised by her sudden question, but then he gave a small, reassuring nod. “Yeah… I think so,” he answered softly. His voice was calm, casual—slightly breathless, but steady.

 

He gestured faintly with his hand, almost dismissively, before adding, “...I can check my phone just in case, though.” His voice had a quiet, easygoing warmth to it—unaffected by the subtle tension lingering beneath Uzi’s own.

 

And somehow… that made her chest tighten even more. She gave a small, almost absentminded nod, not trusting herself to say anything else.

 

Her hand somewhat tightened around the lock. Then, slowly, she turned it and pulled the door open.

 

A gentle gust of morning air swept in, faintly cool against her face. The golden morning sunlight spilled in through the doorway, painting soft streaks of light against the hardwood floor.

 

N stepped through the threshold without hesitation, his movements relaxed and easy. He turned slightly, giving her a faint, almost bashful smile as he passed.

 

And just like that—he was leaving.

 

Her eyes followed him as he walked through the doorway, and as she watched his frame move further from her, she suddenly felt something stir inside her.

 

A sharp, unfamiliar twinge deep in her chest. She couldn’t place it at first—it was faint, almost fleeting. But as he took another step, it lingered—it sank a little deeper. And before she could stop herself, she recognized it.

 

She felt… hurt.

 

Not painfully so.

 

But the weight of it was there nonetheless—a strange, empty ache that settled somewhere beneath her ribs.

 

She didn’t want to feel this way. It wasn’t his fault—of course it wasn’t. He had to go, obviously, he couldn’t stay here forever. That was ridiculous. He had his own life—his own things to do.

 

And she was being dramatic.

 

Ridiculously so.

 

But that logic did nothing to quiet the faint, disappointed ache gnawing at her. No matter how hard she tried to reason with herself, she still felt it clinging stubbornly to her chest.

 

The hollow, sinking sensation of watching him leave. Her fingers lightly brushed against the doorframe, and she stared after him.

 

And in that split second—without thinking, without considering why—her hand suddenly shot out. Before she could even register the motion, her fingers gently closed around his.

 

N froze mid-step.

 

The sudden tug against his hand made him stop in his tracks, and he turned slightly, glancing over his shoulder. His eyes were wide with slight confusion, brows subtly raised.

 

His lips parted slightly, his expression softening as his eyes dropped briefly to where their hands were joined. His fingers were warm beneath hers—faintly stiff with surprise, but unmoving.

 

And then, slowly, he lifted his gaze back to hers. His eyes were searching—uncertain, but not wary. The faint glimmer of confusion in his expression was laced with something gentler—softer.

 

As if silently asking her why.

 

But he didn’t say anything.

 

He simply… waited.

 

His hand, still caught in hers, remained perfectly still. Uzi’s fingers tightened faintly, as if afraid he might pull away.

 

But he didn’t.

 

His grip stayed there—soft, steady, and unmoving. And for a brief moment, the two of them simply stood there in the doorway, eyes locked.

 

Neither of them saying a word.

 

Just… holding on.

 

Before N could say anything—before he could even so much as part his lips—Uzi moved.

 

Without thinking—without stopping herself— without considering why she was doing it.

 

Her arms suddenly lifted, and she threw them around him. Her body pressed into his as she pulled him into an abrupt hug. She squeezed her eyes shut. Her fingers curled slightly against the back of his hoodie, gripping the fabric faintly, almost reflexively.

 

The sudden motion caught N off guard. His body stiffened slightly with surprise, but she didn’t let go. She didn’t know why she was doing this. She shouldn’t have been doing this—she should’ve just let him go—let him walk away without another word.

 

That would’ve been the normal thing to do.

 

The right thing.

 

But she just… couldn’t bring herself to.

 

Her grip around him tightened slightly, her arms clinging to him as if the simple act of holding on would somehow keep him from walking out that door.

 

She knew it wouldn’t.

 

But she hugged him tighter anyway.

 

And in a voice barely above a whisper, she murmured softly against his shoulder,

 

“Bye…” Her voice was quiet—frail and thin, but steady. The simple word lingered in the still morning air, far softer than she meant for it to be. Her throat felt tight when she said it. And with it, her arms tightened ever so slightly around him—almost instinctively—subtle, but noticeable.

 

As if she didn’t want to let go.

 

For a fleeting second, she almost expected him to push her away—to recoil and awkwardly call her weird—to shift back, glance at her with mild confusion, and brush the whole thing off with a joking remark.

 

That would’ve been easier.

 

That would’ve made sense.

 

But instead…

 

She felt his arms slowly—tentatively—rise. The movement was hesitant at first, uncertain. But then, with gentle, deliberate care, they slowly draped around her. His hands lightly rested against her back, his hold faint and delicate.

 

As if he was unsure whether he was supposed to hold her at all.

 

But he did.

 

And then—gradually, softly—his arms tightened. His hands pressed into her back ever so slightly, his embrace becoming a bit more secure. Without thinking, without hesitation, he leaned into the hold.

 

And in a soft, quiet voice, he murmured against the side of her head, “Goodbye.” His voice was low and hushed, barely above a breath. There was no reluctance in his tone—no awkwardness—no uncertainty. Just the same quiet, steady warmth that she had felt from him all morning.

 

And that warmth made her chest tighten all over again.

 

For a long, drawn-out moment, neither of them moved. The two simply stayed there, standing in the doorway with their arms wrapped around each other.

 

Her face lightly pressed into his shoulder.

 

His hands resting gently against her back.

 

Neither of them letting go.

 

Neither of them speaking.

 

The faint morning breeze brushed lightly against them, warm and fleeting, stirring the fabric of their clothes ever so slightly. The soft glow of the sun painted their faces with its golden light.

 

And for that moment—just that moment—it felt like the whole world had stilled.

 

But slowly—hesitantly—Uzi’s grip loosened.

 

Her arms slackened faintly, and she slowly pulled back, her movements reluctant and unhurried. Her eyes lifted slightly, and when she glanced up at him, she found him already looking at her.

 

His eyes were soft—steady.

 

Calm.

 

And faintly—so faintly—a small, gentle smile flickered across his lips. The corners of his mouth barely lifted, but it was there.

 

And she felt herself mirror it.

 

Her lips curved into a small, fleeting smile of her own—a barely perceptible expression, but genuine. Without saying anything, N took a half-step back, releasing her from his hold.

 

He lingered for a brief moment, as if unsure whether he should say something else.

 

But instead, he simply gave her a small, faint wave.

 

Soft and almost shy.

 

Her eyes followed him as he turned away. She stood in the doorway, watching him step out into the golden morning light. Her fingers lightly brushed against the doorframe as her eyes lingered on his retreating figure.

 

And then—slowly, reluctantly—she reached for the door. Her hand closed lightly around the edge, and with a gentle, deliberate motion, she pushed it shut. The door clicked softly into place, the faint sound barely audible.

 

And when it did, she simply stood there.

 

Her hand lingering against the wood.

 

Her eyes faintly lowered.

 

And her chest—still faintly tight with the lingering ache of watching him leave—rose and fell with a slow, measured breath.

Notes:

Uzi is such a drama queen omg 😭🤚

She’s literally js telling N bye but has to have a whole ass y/n moment abt it

Like any normal person even if they felt awkward would still try to be casual abt it ig cuz they don’t wanna make things weird

Or at least that’s what I’d do ig, even if I was overthinking it internally 💔

But Uzi takes that to a whole other level. At the same time, though, ig I can get it. She’s never had an experience with someone like that before and doesn’t really know how to process it, or maybe even can’t process it. And then she *kinda* has attachment issues so it’s like “omg I think I really like you but I don’t I hate you, no I don’t hate you I hate these weird feelings cuz I’ve never felt them. Leave, but I don’t want you to leave cuz this is the first time I’ve felt this way and AHHHHH I hate feelings. So can you just stay?” That’s basically her train of thought in a nutshell 😭😭💔 poor Uzi

And then I feel like N is kinda overthinking it but kinda not, if that makes sense? Like, he thinks he likes her now, and is js kinda going with it. It’s weird and kinda new cuz he js got over his fat crush on V, but even then he never would’ve suspected that what happened with Uzi would’ve *happened*, but it did, and he’s still trying to remember it all and process it himself. But he’s not in the mindset of “oh does she hate me 🥺 maybe I’m not good enough” cuz NO 😭 he’s js internally trying to figure out how he feels, and is patient enough to wait for Uzi to figure out her own feelings.

 

Gosh, I love them, they’re so cute together 😭 it’s so complicated too but mostly cuz of a lack of communication, so hopefully they figure that out cuz that would literally fix so much. Too bad Uzi’s least favorite thing to do it talk about her feelings to others, let alone N 💀🤚

Ok that’s all I have to say. Next chapter tomorrow!

Oh also the next chapter is gonna feature Khan so that’ll be fun 💔 BYE

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 53: Ugh

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi lingered by the door for a moment longer.

 

Her hand remained lightly pressed against the wood, her fingers faintly brushing the surface.  She could still feel the subtle warmth of the morning sun that lingered on her face from where it had filtered through the doorway.

 

But now, with the door shut and the light cut off, the warmth seemed to vanish almost instantly.  Leaving only the dull coolness of the house in its place.

 

She blinked slowly, her gaze distant and unfocused, before finally lowering her hand. Her fingers slipped away from the wood with a faint, absent motion, and she turned around, her legs moving on autopilot as she made her way back toward her room.

 

Her feet moved without thought—slow, unhurried steps carrying her down the hallway, her arms loosely crossed over herself.

 

She barely registered the faint creak of her bedroom door as she pushed it open. The room was exactly as she had left it—the blankets still slightly rumpled, the faint indentation on the pillow where N had rested still there.

 

But the moment she stepped fully inside, she felt it.

 

The absence.

 

The room felt... heavier now.

 

As if it had been drained of something subtle but vital.

 

For a brief moment, her mind felt blank—a muted haze settling over her thoughts.

 

But then, the questions started—spiraling through her head—turning over themselves again and again.

 

What happens now?

 

She fidgeted with the fabric of her sleeves between her fingers absentmindedly.

 

Would things be different now?

 

She thought about seeing him again.

 

At school.

 

In the hallways.

 

At lunch.

 

Would he be the same? Would they be the same?

 

Or… would it be awkward now?

 

She bit the inside of her cheek faintly, the faintest sting grounding her.

 

Would he look at her differently? Would he avoid her?

 

Would he regret it?

 

The thought made something sharp twist in her chest, and she let out a slow, unsteady breath.  She shook her head slightly, trying to brush the thought aside. She didn’t know why she was overthinking it. She shouldn’t have been—She had no reason to feel this... hollow.

 

He didn’t do anything wrong.

 

He didn’t say anything wrong.

 

And yet…

 

She still felt it.

 

That quiet, lingering weight gnawing faintly at her chest. That uneasy ache of uncertainty she couldn’t quite shake.

 

Just as Uzi was about to make her way to her bed, she suddenly paused. Her eyes caught on something near her desk—the faintest blur of color against the floor. Her gaze narrowed slightly, and she slowly turned toward it.

 

And then she saw them—the neatly folded clothes.

 

N’s clothes.

 

The ones he’d worn to the party—the ones he’d changed out of last night when she lent him the spare outfit.

 

For a moment, she simply stared. Her eyes lingered on the fabric, taking in the familiar shapes and colors—the slightly rumpled hoodie, the shirt, and the jeans stacked carefully on top of one another. Right where he’d left them.

 

Her chest tightened with a strange, unexpected pang—something she couldn’t quite place. She slowly walked over, her footsteps light and measured, and crouched down. Reaching out, she carefully picked up the folded bundle. Her fingers somewhat curled around the fabric, feeling the slight weight of it in her hands. The clothes were cool to the touch from sitting in the unheated room all night. She stared down at them, her grip tightening slightly.

 

For a brief moment, the thought flickered through her mind.

 

Should I run after him?

 

Her legs tensed slightly at the impulse.

 

It would only take a second.

 

She could still catch him, maybe. Maybe he hadn’t made it to the bus stop yet. Maybe he was still walking down the street.

 

But then, just as quickly, her thoughts stilled.

 

And she slowly exhaled.

 

No…

 

That would be weird. She knew it would.

 

And besides…

 

He was probably already gone by now.

 

Knowing her luck, he’d probably boarded the bus the second he walked down the block. And even if she wasn’t and she saw him, if she ran after him she’d just look stupid. She’d be out of breath, standing there like an idiot, holding his hoodie out awkwardly while he was halfway across the block.

 

No.

 

She wasn’t going to do that.

 

She shook her head slightly, brushing the thought aside. Her fingers smoothed over the fabric absentmindedly, and she slowly turned away from the door.

 

With a faint sigh, she crossed the room, walking toward the corner where her backpack had been carelessly discarded last time she came home from school.  She knelt down and carefully set the folded clothes beside it, making a mental note to bring them with her tomorrow.

 

She’d just give them back to him at school.

 

That was normal.

 

That was fine.

 

That was how it should be.

 

But as she lingered there for a moment, her fingers lightly brushing over the edge of the clothes, she couldn’t quite ignore the faint, hollow ache still curling at the edges of her chest. The way her eyes lingered on the clothes just a second longer than necessary.

 

And she couldn’t quite shake the thought of running after him from the back of her mind—No matter how much she tried to push it away.

 

Uzi let out a slow, weary breath as she made her way over to her bed, her movements sluggish and aimless. Without bothering to straighten the rumpled blankets, she slumped down onto the mattress, her limbs heavy against the soft fabric.

 

For a brief moment, she simply stared up at the ceiling, her eyes tracing the faint, uneven lines of the plaster.

 

But the stillness was suffocating.

 

She could feel the weight of her thoughts pressing down on her chest again—the memories, the uncertainty, the lingering warmth of N’s touch still ghosting faintly across her skin.

 

With a frustrated sigh, she turned her head to the side, her gaze falling on the small nightstand beside her bed. Her eyes landed on the slightly cracked drawer, and after a moment’s hesitation, she reached out.

 

Her fingers lightly hooked around the handle, and she slowly pulled it open. Inside, half-buried beneath a few stray wires and random odds and ends, she spotted the familiar shape of her gaming controller.

 

Her fingers curled around it, and she pulled it out. She stared at it in her hands for a beat longer than necessary, running her thumb slowly over the smooth surface of the buttons.

 

Maybe this would help.

 

Maybe she just needed a distraction.

 

She pressed the power button, and with a faint, synthetic chime, the controller flickered to life. A moment later, the TV screen illuminated her dim room, filling it with the soft glow of the startup menu.

 

She listlessly scrolled through her game library, her thumb absently flicking over the joystick. Title after title flashed by—games she normally would’ve been excited to play, but now they just looked… bland.

 

Her gaze glazed over the bright cover art and flashy animations, barely registering them. Eventually, she settled on one—a familiar game she’d played countless times before.

 

It was good enough.

 

She pressed Play.

 

And the game loaded.

 

The faint background music filled the room, and her character spawned onto the screen. She placed her hands on the controller, her fingers moving automatically over the buttons, and started playing.

 

But she was barely paying attention. Her eyes were on the game, but her mind… wasn’t. Her thoughts kept drifting, no matter how much she tried to focus. She shot down enemy drones on the screen, dodged obstacles, and collected power-ups, but her movements were mechanical—automatic.

 

Her thoughts kept pulling her back.

 

Back to him.

 

Back to last night.

 

Back to the way it felt.

 

And then… her thoughts shifted. Her fingers slowed slightly over the controller as a new worry crept in. The same  pressing thoughts as earlier, coming back to haunt her.

 

What was going to happen when she went back to school?

 

Her grip tightened slightly on the controller.

 

Would N act like nothing happened?

 

Would he just ignore her?

 

Her chest tightened faintly at the thought, her stomach twisting uncomfortably.

 

Or… would she be the one to avoid him?

 

Could she even look at him without thinking about last night?

 

Her fingers stilled slightly on the controller, and her character took a hit on-screen, but she barely noticed. Her thoughts were moving too fast. And then, suddenly, a new, intrusive thought flickered through her mind.

 

What if someone else noticed?

 

Her breath caught faintly.

 

No one knew about any of it, obviously. But what if…

 

What if someone caught on?

 

She could already imagine it.

 

The curious glances.

 

The whispered remarks.

 

The knowing smirks from other drones in the hallway.

 

Her stomach churned at the thought. She knew she was probably overthinking it. She was definitely overthinking it. No one would suspect anything.

 

…Right?

 

And yet, she still couldn’t shake the twisting feeling in her chest. The gnawing uncertainty. The faint, irrational paranoia that somewhere, somehow, someone might figure it out. And she didn’t even know how she felt about that.

 

She tried to push the thought away, forcing her fingers to move again, making her character dodge and fire on-screen. But no matter how much she tried, she couldn’t keep her thoughts from wandering.

 

And she couldn’t shake the faint, anxious flutter curling at the edges of her chest. Uzi let out a slow sigh as she finally set the controller aside, her fingers feeling a bit stiff from gripping it for so long. She stared at the screen for a moment longer, watching as the game’s end menu faded into the background music.

 

But the distraction wasn’t working anymore.

 

She wasn’t even sure if it ever had.

 

The faint, restless ache that had been gnawing at her chest still lingered, and now she was just left feeling sluggish and drained.

 

She grabbed the controller again and clicked the power button. The TV blinked off, leaving her room in a muted, quiet stillness.

 

Pushing herself off the bed, she swung her legs over the edge, slowly standing. Her joints felt stiff from sitting in the same position for so long, and she stretched slightly, rolling her shoulders.

 

Her stomach let out a faint, low growl, and she placed a hand over it.

 

Right… I should eat lunch.

 

She hadn’t eaten anything all morning.

 

She trudged over to the door and slipped out into the hallway, her steps lazy and uneven. The faint creak of the wooden floor beneath her feet followed her as she padded toward the kitchen.

 

Once inside, she made her way to the fridge and pulled it open, the cool air brushing against her face.

 

Her eyes flicked over the shelves, scanning the contents. She wasn’t in the mood to make anything complicated. Her gaze landed on a jar of peanut butter and a container of jelly.

 

Good enough.

 

She grabbed both jars and placed them on the counter, then reached for the bag of bread, pulling out two slices. Her movements were slow and methodical, barely putting any effort into it.

 

She unscrewed the lid of the peanut butter jar first, dipping a knife inside and spreading a thick layer across one slice of bread. Then, she switched to the jelly, smearing a generous amount onto the other slice. But, while she was in the process of making her sandwich, she suddenly heard a voice behind her.

 

“Hey.”

 

The sound was casual, almost disinterested. But Uzi knew it was anything but disinterested.

 

Because it was her dad.

 

Uzi’s hands stilled for the briefest moment, but she didn’t turn around. She simply muttered a flat, “Hey,” under her breath, her tone dull and indifferent.

 

She continued to press the sandwich together, her fingers idly wiping a bit of the excess jelly off the edge with the tip of her finger. But even after a moment, she could still feel it.

 

The weight of his presence.

 

Lingering.

 

Without even needing to glance over her shoulder, she could tell he was still standing there—idle and unmoving.

 

Just… waiting.

 

As if he was anticipating something.

 

Her jaw tensed ever so slightly, and with a quiet, annoyed breath, she finally cast a glance over her shoulder.

 

Sure enough, he was still standing there.

 

Just watching her.

 

He wasn’t saying anything—just loitering in the doorway, his hands loosely in his pockets, his expression casual. Uzi’s eyes narrowed faintly, unimpressed. “...Do you need something?” she asked, her tone flat and impatient. Her voice lacked any real interest—barely meeting the bare minimum for conversation.

 

She didn’t feel like talking.

 

Not to him.

 

Not right now.

 

Her fingers curled slightly against the counter, gripping the edge faintly.

 

Why was he even here?

 

What did he want?

 

And why couldn’t he just say it instead of hovering like some awkward shadow?

 

Her chest tightened faintly with a familiar irritation. She wasn’t in the mood for his small talk or awkward attempts at conversation.

 

Not today.

 

Her mind was still too tangled—still too heavy with everything from last night. And right now, she just wanted to be left alone.

 

Her dad’s voice was casual when he finally spoke. “Just wondering how you’ve been doing.” There was no particular weight behind the words—his tone was even and neutral. Almost offhanded.

 

But Uzi’s hands stilled faintly at the unexpectedness of it. Her brows knit slightly, confused.

 

What?

 

Her dad never asked her how she was doing.

 

Like… ever.

 

In fact, half the time, he barely even acknowledged her existence. He was always too buried in work—wrapped up in whatever projects or repairs he had going on.

 

She could go whole days without seeing him, even when they were in the same house. And now, suddenly, he was asking her how she was?

 

It felt… off.

 

Suspicious, even.

 

But she didn’t let any of that show on her face. Without looking at him, she simply responded with a flat, “Fine.”

 

Her voice was as dull and indifferent as ever, barely pausing in her movements as she kept working on her sandwich. She slathered the last of the jelly onto the bread, carelessly wiping the edge of the knife against the rim of the jar to clean it.

 

Then, she pressed the two halves together, the jelly seeping faintly at the edges from the pressure.

 

She grabbed the lids to both jars, twisting them on with stiff, absentminded motions, ready to put them away. But just as she was reaching for the fridge door, her dad’s voice cut through the stillness again.

 

“So… why’d you have a boy over last night?”

 

Her hands instantly faltered.

 

The jars nearly slipped from her fingers.

 

Her grip tightened reflexively, knuckles tensing around the glass, and she quickly shoved them into the fridge before they could slip. She felt a pit form in her stomach.

 

He knew.

 

Her eyes flicked downward sharply, suddenly very focused on closing the fridge door. Her fingers lingered faintly on the handle before she pulled away, her expression rigid and unreadable.

 

Forcing her voice into an even tone, she muttered, “He’s my friend.” Her eyes stayed fixed on the counter, deliberately not looking at her dad. “We were just hanging out.” Her voice was clipped—curt, even.   

 

Too casual.

 

Too rehearsed.

 

Like she was brushing it off without a second thought—making it clear there was nothing noteworthy or suspicious about it. Because there wasn’t.

 

Even so, her pulse had quickened.

 

Her throat felt tight.

 

How did he know?

 

Had N made too much noise when he left? Or was her dad just assuming? No—there was no way he could actually know anything.

 

Right?

 

Right?

 

Her hands somewhat curled against the edge of the counter. Her voice may have been flat, but her mind was anything but. It was spinning, suddenly tangled with a sharp, buzzing tension she hadn’t expected.

 

But she didn’t look at him.

 

She didn’t dare look at him.

 

Because she knew if she did, she might see some hint of suspicion in his eyes—some glimmer of doubt.And the last thing she needed right now was to give herself away.

 

When he spoke up again, her dad’s voice was casual, but there was an unmistakable trace of teasing laced into it. “Just a friend, eh?” He drawled it lightly—almost sing-song, like he was already prying.

 

Uzi’s jaw immediately clenched. Her eyes snapped toward him, sharp and narrow. Her glare was withering—blunt and warning all at once. “Obviously, Dad,” she shot back, her voice dry and curt.

 

She turned away sharply, snatching her sandwich off the counter. “Don’t make it weird.” Her tone was cutting—biting in that signature, deadpan way of hers. But the slight flare in her voice betrayed the defensive edge curling at the back of her throat. Without another word, she took a firm bite of her sandwich, deciding to stand right where she was rather than sit down.

 

Her eyes remained pointedly averted from her dad. Just go away, she silently willed him.

 

Please, just drop it.

 

But he didn’t.

 

Instead, she heard the faint shift of his stance, and her stomach sank faintly as he spoke again. “You know,” he started, his voice taking on an airy, wistful tone, “I was young and in love once, too.”

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly, her expression flattening.

 

Oh, robo-god.

 

No.

 

No, no, no

 

She immediately knew where this was going, but before she could cut him off, he was already continuing.

 

“Your mother and I—”

 

Ew—gross—

 

She abruptly cut him off mid-sentence, scrunching her face in exaggerated disgust. Her voice was louder now—blunt and exasperated as she waved a hand in the air dismissively, as if physically shooing the words away.

 

“I don’t want to know about that.” Her words were flat and final, leaving zero room for further elaboration.

 

But her dad only paused briefly at her interruption, his eyes squinting faintly with playful amusement. Then, with a slight smirk, he cocked his head to the side.

 

“Oh, really?” he said lightly, arching a brow. There was a deliberate pause—far too deliberate—before he added, with mock innocence:

 

“Are you sure you’re not dating that boy by any chance?”

 

Her whole body immediately stiffened.

 

She stared at him.

 

For a brief second, her breath stalled—caught in her throat.

 

But then her face flushed hot. Her eyes narrowed in a flash of heated embarrassment, glaring daggers at him.  Her grip on the sandwich tightened slightly. Her shoulders squared. She practically snapped—

 

No!” Her voice came out harsher than she intended, crackling with sharp indignation.

 

Her jaw clenched further as she slammed the sandwich back onto the counter with a heavy thud, her eyes flashing with irritation.

 

“He’s just a friend,” she growled through her teeth, her voice flat and clipped, her words emphasized with a hard edge. She turned away from him stiffly, her hands bracing against the edge of the counter, knuckles faintly tense.

 

Her face was practically burning. But it wasn’t just from embarrassment—it was from sheer frustration.

 

Why was he even doing this?!

 

Her eyes narrowed at the counter, her expression twisted into a scowl.

 

What was his problem?

 

She was already in a bad mood, and now he was making it so much worse. Her hands tightened, her fingers curling against the counter’s surface.

 

She didn’t want to explain herself.

 

She didn’t have to explain herself.

 

And she sure as hell didn’t need him making things more complicated than they already were.

 

As Uzi took another bite of her sandwich, she tried to block out her dad’s presence entirely.


Maybe if I just ignore him, he’ll shut up and leave.

 

But—of course—he didn’t.

 

Instead, his voice chimed in once again, annoyingly lighthearted. “So… is he nice?”

 

Uzi paused mid-bite, frustration bubbling up within her once more. Her eyes narrowed as she slowly turned her head toward him, looking over her shoulder.

 

Her dad’s expression was irritatingly genuine, as if he were actually curious. “Is he treating you well?” he added casually, tilting his head slightly with a teasing glint in his eye.

 

She stared at him flatly. Her fingers clenched around the sandwich, her knuckles tightening ever so slightly.

 

Oh my robo-god, she seethed inwardly, already feeling her patience fraying. She inhaled sharply through her nose, steadying herself—silently willing herself not to snap.

 

But the tightness in her chest was suffocating. With a terse exhale, she forced her voice into something steady, but clipped—her words coming out fast and firm.

 

“For the last time,” she bit out, her tone low and stiff with poorly contained irritation, “we’re just friends.” She glanced at him sharply, her eyes narrowing faintly with warning.

 

“We’re not dating,” she added curtly, her voice flat and rigid, her words quick and final. Her glare hardened. “And there’s absolutely nothing going on between us.”Her voice was pointed—cool and razor-sharp with exasperation. Her eyes were practically daring him to keep going.

 

Her dad blinked at her—his brow lifting slightly at her tone. For the first time, he seemed to actually notice how tense she was. A flicker of realization briefly crossed his face, and he hesitated.

 

Then, with a half-hearted chuckle, he lifted his hands in mock surrender. “Alright, alright,” he said lightly, as if placating her.“Got it.” But despite his casual tone, there was still a faint glimmer of suspicion in his eyes.

 

He lingered for a beat longer, peering at her with a squint that was far too playful. And then, with a teasing edge to his voice, he pointed at her faintly. “You better be telling the truth, young lady,” he added in a mock-stern tone, his brow raised slightly.

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed sharply, and she let out an exaggerated, heavy sigh. She rolled her eyes so hard it was practically theatrical.

 

With a deadpan look, she leveled him with a flat, defiant stare. “Nope,” she said dryly, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

 

She shoved another bite of sandwich into her mouth and added, her words muffled,“I’m absolutely lying. You caught me.” Her voice was laced with such exaggerated sarcasm that it was impossible to miss.

 

Her dad opened his mouth slightly, clearly about to retort—

 

But suddenly, the buzzing of his phone cut through the air.

 

He blinked and immediately reached into his pocket, pulling it out. His eyes flicked to the screen, and he squinted at it for a moment before exhaling sharply.

 

“Ah—gotta go,” he said, glancing at Uzi briefly, his tone suddenly distracted. He stuffed the phone against his ear, his voice shifting into a more professional cadence.

 

“Work’s calling,” he added quickly, waving a hand vaguely.

 

As he turned away, he muttered under his breath, almost to himself,“Big sales pitch today… huge door.”

 

There was a flicker of excitement in his eyes, and he briefly glanced back at her, his face brightening with unmistakable enthusiasm. His voice lowered conspiratorially.

 

“Seriously—you should see this thing.” His eyes widened slightly in exaggerated awe. “Top-of-the-line hinges. Practically frictionless swing.” His grin widened faintly, looking a little too excited.

 

Uzi stared at him flatly, unimpressed.

 

He gave her a brief salute with two fingers, still grinning. “Bye, kiddo.” And with that, he spun around and walked out the doorway without another word.

 

The moment he was gone, Uzi let out a sharp exhale, her eyes immediately narrowing. Her fingers clenched faintly around her sandwich, and she dropped it back onto the plate. Her shoulders sagged slightly, a heavy sigh escaping her.

 

Finally.

 

Her hands pressed against the counter, bracing herself slightly. Her eyes hardened as she scowled at the spot where he had been standing.

 

Jeez, she seethed inwardly, he’s so annoying.

 

She stared at the sandwich on the plate, but the appetite she had felt earlier was now practically gone. Uzi set the sandwich down on a napkin and left it on the counter.

 

I’ll just finish it later,  she thought vaguely, suddenly having no real interest in it anymore. Her stomach felt too knotted with irritation for her to even consider eating.

 

She let out a sharp sigh, her breath pushing through her lips in a faint huff. Her hands fell to her sides as she leaned back slightly against the counter, her shoulders sagging under the weight of her lingering frustration.

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly, unfocused, as her mind drifted back to the conversation she’d just had.

 

Why the hell was he asking me about N?

 

Her lips pressed into a thin line.

 

It wasn’t that unusual for her dad to be nosy—he was naturally intrusive without even realizing it—but the way he’d kept poking at the subject, his teasing tone and prodding questions… it left a weird feeling simmering in her chest.

 

Why was he being so weird about it?

 

Her brows furrowed faintly.

 

I’ve had sleepovers with guys before…

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly as she stared at the countertop, her gaze dull and pensive.

 

He didn’t make a big deal about it back then. He just assumed we were being dumb kids.

 

The thought stirred a faint pang of annoyance in her chest. Her fingers tapped idly against the counter once—slow and listless.

 

So why is this suddenly different?

 

The realization hit her sluggishly—gradually piecing itself together in her head.

 

Oh.

 

Her shoulders stiffened slightly.

 

Right.

 

Her stomach gave a faint twist of discomfort.

 

The last time I had a sleepover with a guy…

 

Her eyes hardened faintly, her jaw clenching.

 

Was back in middle school.

 

The faint twinge of frustration in her chest thickened slightly, simmering just beneath the surface. Her fingers lightly curled into her palm, tightening in a slow, agitated motion.

 

Of course he’d think it’s weird now.

 

We’re not little kids anymore.

 

Her lips pressed into a thin line, her teeth faintly gritting behind them.

 

Why didn’t I think of that sooner?

 

Her brow furrowed, her expression darkening slightly with self-reproach. She huffed sharply, irritated with herself.

 

She scowled inwardly, I was so stupid for not even considering that.

 

The tension lingered faintly in her chest—a slow, dull frustration winding through her. She exhaled quietly through her nose, her fingers loosening against the counter.

 

Whatever, she thought curtly, brushing it off with a slow shake of her head.

 

Her fingers pushed off the counter slightly, and she turned away, already trying to shove the entire conversation to the back of her mind.

 

Uzi made her way back to her room, her footsteps heavy and sluggish. Her hand pressed against the door as she opened it, slipping inside and closing it behind her with a dull click. She lingered there for a brief moment, her hand still loosely gripping the doorknob.

 

Her eyes lowered slightly, unfocused. The faint tension in her chest hadn’t eased in the slightest.

 

With a slow exhale, she turned away and trudged over to her bed. She sank onto the mattress with a graceless plop, her body feeling heavier than it should have. Her limbs felt stiff and tired, but her mind wouldn’t slow down.

 

She shifted onto her back, her eyes drifting up to the ceiling. Her gaze was dull and vacant, barely registering the smooth, blank surface above her. But her thoughts were anything but empty. She stared upward, her expression flattening faintly as her dad’s voice echoed in her head.

 

‘Your mother and I—’

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly.

 

Her jaw tightened.

 

Why did he have to bring her up?

 

Her chest gave a faint, uncomfortable clench. Her lips pressed into a thin line, her breath pulling in slow and stiff.

 

I hate it when he does that.

 

Her hand slowly curled into her blanket, gripping it weakly.

 

Why can’t he just let her rest in peace?

 

Her stomach twisted slightly—a bitter knot slowly tightening in her gut.

 

Why does he have to keep bringing her back—just to remind me she’s gone?

 

Her eyes stung slightly, but she quickly blinked away the sensation. Her grip on the blanket subtly tensed.

 

Why did she have to die?

 

Her brows knit, a quiet heaviness pressing against her chest.

 

Why did she have to leave when I was still so young?

 

Her eyes dulled slightly, her gaze losing focus against the ceiling.

 

It wasn’t fair.

 

Her fingers tightened around the fabric in a slow, agitated motion.

 

None of it was fair.

 

Her stomach gave a faint, nauseous twist as the familiar, bitter ache settled in her chest. Her breathing shallowed slightly. Her eyes lowered, dull and tired, and she turned onto her side. Her blanket slipped slightly over her shoulder as she adjusted, but she didn’t bother fixing it. She stared blankly at the wall, her eyes lidded faintly. Her hand loosely clutched at the fabric near her chest.

 

Her mind drifted slowly—listless and bitterly reflective—back to the memory. The day everything changed—she could still picture it. She had been in middle school. She hadn’t understood at first, hadn’t been told the truth. Her dad had just said there was an accident.

 

Some sort of tragic accident.

 

Her fingers faintly tensed against the blanket.

 

That’s what I thought.

 

I believed that for so long.

 

The dull ache in her chest thickened slightly, pulling taut in her ribs.

 

Until the day he finally sat me down.

 

The memory surfaced sluggishly—heavy and cold. She could still picture the moment vividly. Her dad’s expression had been grim.

 

Stiff.

 

Serious.

 

He’d told her the truth.

 

Her mother hadn’t died in an accident.

 

Her fingers gripped the blanket more tightly, her knuckles faintly straining.

 

She’d been murdered.

 

The word struck sharply in her mind, cutting through her like ice.

 

And I didn’t even know.

 

Her stomach gave a slow, uncomfortable twist. Her lips parted slightly, a faint, shaky exhale slipping through them. Her fingers, still clenched around the blanket, gave a faint, tremorous twitch.

 

Her eyes softened momentarily, glimmering with a distant, buried sadness she didn’t want to acknowledge. She swallowed thickly, her throat dry and stiff. Her eyes lowered for a second, unfocused.

 

I didn’t even know.

 

The dull ache lingered heavily in her chest—slow and suffocating. Her fingers slowly loosened their grip on the blanket, her hand going slack. Her breathing slowed slightly—shallow and weary. Her eyes remained heavy and unfocused, staring dimly at the wall. And she let herself fall silent—drowning in the stillness.

 

Uzi’s eyes remained lidded as she lay motionless on her side, her gaze dim and unfocused. Her thoughts lingered heavily on the memory—the old, familiar ache refusing to loosen its hold. Her stomach felt tight, her chest constricted with a dull, suffocating weight.

 

But she didn’t want to think about it.

 

Not now.

 

Not again.

 

Her eyes slowly shut.

 

Just stop.

 

Her brow subtly furrowed, and with a sharp, shaky breath, she shoved the thoughts down.

 

It doesn’t matter anymore.

 

It’s not important.

 

Her grip on the blanket subtly tensed again.

 

That was years ago.

 

Her jaw faintly tightened.

 

And I’ve already processed it.

 

…Right?

 

Her breathing slowed slightly, more deliberate—stiff. She then forced her grip on the blanket to loosen. She willed her muscles to ease, even if they didn’t want to. She took in a slow, steadying breath—drawing it in through her nose—and released it shakily through her lips.

 

She stared vacantly at the wall for a moment longer, her eyes dull and tired. But the stiffness lingered beneath her skin.

 

Her throat still felt tight.

 

Her eyes slightly stung.

 

And that familiar, bitter knot was still curled stiffly in her stomach.

 

I wish I had someone to talk to.

 

The thought surfaced slowly, almost dully, before she could stop it.

 

Someone who could actually listen.

 

The thought lingered sluggishly in her chest—heavy and fleeting at the same time. She’d considered therapy before.—maybe she could consider it again. But her eyes dimmed slightly at the thought, her expression flattening faintly.

 

Last time I tried that…

 

Her lips pressed into a thin line.

 

Her stomach twisted faintly at the memory.

 

I just shut down.

 

She remembered the sessions—the blank stares she’d given the therapist. The silence that had stretched far too long.  She hadn’t said a word to the therapist, hadn’t shared a single thought. She just… sat there.

 

What was the point?

 

Her hand subtly curled against the blanket again.

 

I just wasted everyone’s time.

 

She had only gone because her dad made her. But again, she had refused to open up entirely. After a few appointments, she had just asked her dad to stop making her go.

 

To stop wasting money on me.

 

And he did.

 

No questions. No arguments. He just… stopped.

 

She stared at the wall for a moment longer, eyes heavy and listless.

 

But then, she exhaled sharply through her nose, almost as if she were physically shaking the thoughts off. Her jaw tensed.

 

Stop.

 

Just stop.

 

She didn’t want to think about this—not anymore. It was depressing and pointless.  Her brows faintly furrowed as she forced herself to think of something else.

 

Something—anything—positive.

 

Her mind sifted sluggishly, searching for something brighter. But the first thing that surfaced—the very first thing—

 

—was N.

 

Her eyes widened faintly, startled by her own thoughts. Her breath subtly caught in her throat. A faint, stuttering heat crept up her neck, flushing against her cheeks.

 

Oh, come on.

 

Her lips parted slightly, her breathing shallow.

 

Why him?

 

She exhaled sharply through her nose, almost annoyed with herself. But the heat on her face only grew warmer. And without even thinking, she quickly rolled onto her back again.

 

Her hands shot up and clamped over her face. She squeezed her eyes shut beneath her palms, her face burning. Her fingers pressed faintly against her cheeks, trying—and failing—to will the heat away.

 

Seriously?

 

Just the thought of him does this to me now?

 

Her stomach gave a faint, fluttering twist. She released a breathless, irritated huff against her palms. Her heart was still beating faster than it should have been.

 

After a long, drawn out moment of this, her hands lowered slightly, still loosely covering her face.

 

Why are feelings so damn complicated?

 

Her chest gave a slow, conflicted squeeze. She stared blankly upward, her hands still partially covering her face. Her expression was faintly exasperated—flustered.

 

And she let out a heavy, muffled groan into her palms. Because no matter how hard she tried to push him out of her thoughts—

 

—he was still there.

 

Uzi exhaled sharply through her nose, still sprawled out on her bed. Her eyes were half-lidded, glazed with boredom as she stared listlessly at the ceiling. Her chest lifted with a slow, weary breath.

 

Maybe I should just take a nap.

 

The sluggish thought dragged through her mind, slow and indifferent. Her eyes idly flicked to the alarm clock sitting on her nightstand.

 

12:48 PM.

 

She let out an irritated groan.

 

Seriously?

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly at the numbers, a faint scowl tugging at her lips.

 

How is it still this early?

 

She flopped onto her side, exhaling heavily through her nose. Her expression remained tired and irritable, her brows faintly furrowed. The day was crawling by—painfully slow.

 

Agonizingly slow.

 

And she just wanted it to be over.

 

Her eyes slowly drifted shut as she tugged the blankets over herself. The thick, familiar warmth wrapped around her, and she slowly curled into it, her body half-buried in the folds. She tucked her knees closer, pulling the covers higher until her face was practically hidden.

 

Her eyes shut tighter.

 

Just sleep.

 

Her breathing slowed faintly, and she nestled herself further into the blankets, almost defiantly, as if trying to force herself into unconsciousness. Her arms curled tighter around herself, and she turned her face deeper into the fabric.

 

But then—

 

She suddenly stiffened.

 

And her eyes subtly fluttered open, her breath catching in her throat.

 

Because there was something familiar—

 

—something distinct—

 

—about the scent lingering in the fabric.

 

Her eyes widened slightly. The faint, earthy trace clung subtly to the blankets.

 

Soft. Subtle.

 

But unmistakable.

 

And before she could even stop herself, she slowly inhaled through her nose. Her chest expanded slightly, and she stilled.

 

It was faint—almost elusive. Yet, the scent was still there. It was warm, rich, and faintly rugged—like cedarwood.

 

Her stomach gave a faint, startled flutter. Her breath stilled in her throat.

 

Wait…

 

Her eyes widened faintly, her grip on the blanket loosening.

 

That’s—

 

Her chest tightened with realization.

 

N.

 

Her eyes shot open. She jolted upright with a frustrated huff, shoving the blanket off of her with a sharp, irritated motion. It slumped heavily to the mattress, falling into a tangled heap. She glared down at it, her face burning with flustered agitation.

 

Seriously?

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly—she stared at it, almost accusatorially.

 

Why the hell does it smell like him?

 

When did I even—?

 

She continued eyeing the blanket with an accusatory glare, as if it had done something to personally wrong her.

 

But then, she realized—

 

Of course.

 

He had it on him last night.

 

A slow yet building heat creeped up her neck. She felt like there were butterflies fluttering within her. She exhaled sharply through her nose.

 

She hadn’t even realized that he had a distinct scent—

 

—let alone that she recognized it.

 

But now that it was in her head—

 

—it wouldn’t leave.

 

Her jaw subtly tightened, her expression pulling taut with exasperation. She let out a low, annoyed groan, scrubbing her hands down her face. Her palms lingered over her eyes for a moment, trying to will the heat away. Her face was still flushed—her ears warm.

 

This is so stupid.

 

She swung her legs over the side of the bed, standing abruptly. Her jaw was still clenched, and her lips pressed into a thin, irritated line.

 

I need to get out of here.

 

Her strides were short and stiff, her steps heavier than they needed to be as she made her way to the bathroom door. Her hand pressed firmly against the handle, and she shoved it open with a bit more force than necessary.

 

She walked in, closing the door behind her. For a moment, she just stood there—her hands slowly lowered to her sides—her eyes were half-lidded, faintly dulled.

 

And she stared at her reflection.

 

Her own face stared back at her, eyes slightly tired, brow slightly knit. She could see the faint traces of heat still lingering on her face—

 

—the subtle flush still clinging to her cheeks.

 

Her expression remained dull, almost annoyed. Her gaze slowly narrowed. Her lips pressed into a faint, irritated line.

 

Seriously.

 

Why can’t I get him out of my head?

 

Her hands slowly pressed against the edge of the sink, her fingers faintly curling against the cool porcelain. Her eyes remained locked on her own reflection.

 

One way or another…

 

Her hands gripped the edge of the sink slightly tighter.

 

…I’ll figure out how to stop thinking about him.

 

Her gaze remained steely—defiant—staring herself down. But the faint heat was still lingering in her face.

 

And the weight in her chest wasn’t easing.

Notes:

Ok I have quite a few things to say, I think

So first off, idk if anyone was wondering this, but to clarify the layout of Uzi’s room since I never properly explained it, I think. When you enter her room, the bed faces the door, against the wall on the left side. When you walk in, there’s a TV that also has probably like an Xbox or som with it directly in front of her bed. Then, if you sit on her bed against the backboard, to the left of you (or, if you’re standing in the doorway, it’d be to the right of the bed.) is her nightstand. Next to her nightstand is her desk with her PC, and like there’s a chair with the desk and stuff. Then, back to the room door, on the same wall as that door right beside it is her dresser. Then, a little bit further along the same wall is her bathroom door (it’s connected to her room.) and lastly, place yourself back onto her bed. Look to your left, past the nightstand and her desk on the far wall, is her closet door (one of those folding looking ones. The best way I can explain it is like the closet door in fnaf 4 😭🤚 you get the idea.)

I HOPE THAT ALL MADE SENSEEE I might draw it out digitally and put a photo in the fic somewhere if I feel like it.

Then, next thing I wanted to say is FINALLY Khan has some screen time (or not screen time obvi cuz this isn’t a show but idk a better word to use?? 💀)
I loved writing his character it’s so fun. And it’s so funny to me how much he pisses ofc Uzi without even realizing 💔 poor Uzi

Technically Uzi wasn’t lying when he told her she better not be cuz like, she’s not dating N. So is it really that wrong that she was mad at him 🤷 LMAO she needs to calm tf down though she was getting so worked up 😭

Then LMAOO when Uzi smelled N’s ‘scent’ or wtv on her blankets 💔 I can only imagine the sheer rage she felt in that moment
I wrote that it smelled like cedarwood cuz I felt like that fit him tbh. If you know what that smells like maybe you’ll get what I mean. Personally, I love the smell of cedarwood too so like I js thought why not. It’s like, a pleasant, not super strong, not particularly ‘masculine’ or ‘feminine’ (cuz apparently smells have gender according to pretty much all hygiene product brands 🙄 but that’s besides the point) and overall it is smells nice idk

Ok I need to stop glazing cedarwood LMAO 😭

OH and another thing, we finally found out how Uzi’s mom died!! I mentioned that she died in like, way earlier chapters, but I js haven’t had an actual reason to mention it fully.

I feel like this chapter js gives a bunch more insight on Uzi’s mindset and maybe the reason why she has trouble processing stuff too. I just overall really like the way this chapter turned out.

Ok, that’s all I have to say. WAIT OK ONE MORE THING I’m not gonna post a chapter tomorrow. I wanna take another break day to focus solely on writing cuz I have so much in store. OH AND ALSO this is like, the end of the third ark, so that’s great 😃👍

Next chapter will be posted Saturday. Stay tuned!!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 54: Hands

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi sat slouched in her usual seat on the school bus, her shoulder pressed slightly against the window as she stared out at the blur of passing scenery. Her reflection hovered dimly in the glass, fractured slightly by the faint smudges streaked across the surface. The dull morning light cast her face in a faint, washed-out glow, illuminating the weary lines in her expression.

 

Her head throbbed faintly with each passing second. A dull, pulsing ache pounded at her temples, making her eyes feel heavy and strained. She exhaled quietly through her nose, her breath fogging the glass. With a small wince, she pressed the tips of her fingers against her temples, rubbing them in slow, aimless circles.

 

Her eyes drifted shut for a moment, blocking out the world as she tried to will the headache away. But it lingered—persistent and pounding—splintering through her skull with a dull, rhythmic sting. She exhaled softly, squeezing her eyes shut.

 

She had no idea why she woke up with a headache—it just happened. She hadn’t even stayed up that late last night, and she didn’t feel sick. But now, the ache was slowly drilling into her brain, gnawing behind her eyes, making it hard to focus.

 

She grimaced slightly, her brows knitting together. Her fingers pressed a little harder into her temples.

 

Just ignore it.

 

It’ll pass.

 

She forced her eyes open again, watching the scenery drift by. The world outside was its usual dull palette—the same cracked, winding roads and the same bleak fields stretching on into the distance. The occasional faded billboard or broken fence blurred by in the corner of her vision.

 

It was a normal Monday.

 

Ordinary.

 

Unremarkable.

 

But Uzi felt anything but normal.

 

Her grip subtly tightened on the edge of the seat, her fingers curling faintly into the rough fabric.

 

Because today—

 

Today she was going to see him again.

 

Her stomach twisted at the thought.

 

Her fingers stopped moving against her temples, going still.

 

Her throat tightened slightly.

 

Oh, robo-god.

 

She shifted in her seat, her hands slowly lowering to her lap. She had no idea how to feel about seeing N again.

 

Her mind had been consumed with him all of yesterday—the memory of him tangled in her sheets, the lingering warmth of his arms around her, the quiet rasp of his voice in her ear. The subtle weight of his hand resting against her cheek. The look in his eyes when he told her goodbye.

 

It hadn’t left her alone. Not once.

 

Her stomach gave a subtle, anxious clench. She exhaled slowly, staring out at the road with dull, unfocused eyes.

 

She still hadn’t fully processed the night of the party as well—the way things had shifted so quickly. The way it all felt so natural in the moment, only to leave her stomach twisting with uncertainty after the fact.

 

And now—after everything that happened—she was going to see him at school.

 

Her mind churned with the thought, running through endless possibilities.

 

Would he act like nothing happened?

 

Her chest subtly clenched at the thought.

 

Would he just glance at her in the hallway with that same easy, careless, genuine smile—the one he gave everyone—and walk right past her?

 

Her fingers subtly tensed against her lap, clenching into the fabric of her jeans.

 

Or worse—

 

What if he was weird about it?

 

Her throat tightened.

 

What if things were awkward?

 

Her stomach knotted at the idea of the two of them avoiding eye contact in the hallway, the subtle tension weighing thick and heavy between them.

 

Or—

 

—what if he regretted it?

 

Her fingers clamped tighter against her jeans.

 

What if he thought it was a mistake?

 

Her breath stilled faintly in her throat, and her eyes became dull and unfocused.

 

Her stomach gave a faint, nervous flutter—the kind that prickled faintly against her skin, uncomfortable and restless.

 

She released a slow, shaky breath through her nose, forcing herself to ease the tension in her jaw.

 

She stared out at the scenery, her eyes barely registering the blurred shapes of trees and telephone poles flashing by.

 

Her hands slowly loosened their grip on her jeans.

 

Her fingers uncurled slightly.

 

But the weight in her chest refused to ease.

 

And her headache—relentless and dull—continued to pound behind her eyes.

 

Uzi slipped her hand into her pocket, her fingers curling around the smooth surface of her phone. With a dull sigh, she pulled it out and absently flicked the screen on. She stared at the faint glow for a moment, her eyes still hazy with the heaviness clinging to her skull.

 

Without really thinking, she reached into her other pocket, her fingers brushing over the cool plastic casing of her headphones. She tugged them out, the thin white cord trailing between her fingers. But, as always, they were a tangled mess.

 

Her brows knit together slightly in frustration, and she hastily began to pick apart the knots, her fingers stiff and impatient. The wires looped and twisted stubbornly around each other, refusing to cooperate. Her lips pressed into a thin line, her movements growing more hurried and fidgety.

 

Finally, after a few exasperated tugs, the knots came undone. With a sharp inhale, she quickly plugged the jack into her phone and shoved the earbuds into her ears. She slouched further into her seat, pulling her hood up over her head.

 

Maybe some music would help.

 

Her fingers tapped idly at her screen, scrolling through her playlist until she found something tolerable. She barely even paid attention to what song she picked—she just tapped the first one her thumb landed on. She just needed the noise.

 

A slow, rhythmic melody filled her ears, dulling the edges of her headache slightly. The faint pulse of bass thrummed softly in her skull, and she exhaled a slow breath, letting her head rest lightly against the window.

 

She stared out at the blur of the road, the faint reflection of her face barely visible in the glass. Her eyes felt heavy—so heavy. The steady lull of the bus, the low rumble of the engine, and the faint vibration of the wheels against the road made her limbs feel sluggish and tired.

 

Her eyelids drooped slightly.

 

Her breathing slowed.

 

Just a moment.

 

Just… resting her eyes.

 

The world beyond the window blurred into a smear of muted colors, the faint rhythm of the music dimming into the background. The soft hum of the bus, the steady sway of the ride—it all started to pull her under.

 

Her thoughts stilled.

 

Her mind drifted into a hazy, shallow sleep.

 

Her breathing grew soft and even, her hands resting limply in her lap, her fingers lightly curled around her phone. The gentle hum of the engine was oddly soothing, and for a brief moment, the dull ache in her head felt far away.

 

But then—

 

A faint, hesitant tap on her shoulder.

 

Her brows furrowed. Her sluggish, disoriented mind barely registered the sensation at first.

 

Another tap.

 

She somewhat stirred, her eyes fluttering open with a groggy slowness. Her vision was blurred and hazy with sleep, and her body was stiff with the ache of having dozed off at an awkward angle.

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly, still bleary from the haze of half-sleep, and she groggily turned toward the interruption. Her gaze was drowsy and half-lidded, her expression faintly irritated as she prepared to glare at whoever had dared to wake her.

 

But—

 

Her breath caught in her throat.

 

Him.

 

Her eyes widened slightly, her drowsiness vanishing in an instant.

 

N stood there, his hand still lightly hovering near her shoulder from where he had tapped her. His eyes met hers with a soft, almost hesitant look.

 

Her heart stuttered faintly.

 

Oh.

 

She had… forgotten.

 

How the hell had she forgotten?

 

The haze of her headache and the dull fog of her tiredness had made her oblivious to the most obvious thing—the fact that N rode this bus.

 

Of course he did.

 

She had been so distracted—so caught up in her own swirling thoughts, her pounding head, and the aimless blur of the morning—that it had completely slipped her mind.

 

And now he was here.

 

Her breath stilled faintly.

 

She stared at him, her eyes wide and startled.

 

He stood there in the narrow aisle, his usual, easygoing expression softened. He glanced down at her, his head tilted slightly, a gentle curiosity lingering in his gaze.

 

For a brief, fleeting moment, she almost forgot how to breathe.

 

He sat with her sometimes— every now and then, when the bus wasn’t too crowded, he’d just plop down beside her without a word, flash that familiar crooked smile, and they’d talk.

 

But today—today—she hadn’t expected it.

 

Her stomach gave a faint, involuntary flutter, catching her off guard.

 

Her fingers subtly tensed around the phone still resting in her lap.

 

She didn’t move. She just stared at him, her eyes faintly wide, her breath caught somewhere in her throat.

 

Because today, of all days, she hadn’t been ready to see him.

 

Uzi blinked at N, still disoriented from being pulled so suddenly from sleep. Her eyes were somewhat narrowed with lingering drowsiness, and she stared at him for a brief moment, momentarily caught off guard by his presence.

 

Then, in a low, flat voice, she muttered, “What?”

 

Her tone came out more bluntly than she had intended. She hadn’t meant for it to sound so clipped—it was just that she was irritable. Very irritable. Between her pounding headache, the general misery of morning, and the strange knot of emotions she’d been carrying in her chest since yesterday, she wasn’t exactly in the mood to be friendly.

 

But N didn’t seem the least bit fazed by her shortness.

 

Instead, he offered her a small, easy smile—soft, almost sheepish. His golden eyes held a familiar warmth, quietly undeterred by her grogginess.

 

“Mind if I sit with you?” he asked, his voice light, casual—maybe even a little hopeful.

 

His smile lingered, and his eyes held hers steadily.

 

Uzi’s stomach gave a faint, involuntary flutter.

 

Damn it.

 

Why did he always have to look at her like that?

 

It wasn’t a bad thing—it wasn’t. His expression wasn’t smug or teasing or insincere. It was just… gentle. The soft kind of expression that made her chest feel weirdly tight, like it was twisting in on itself.

 

Her thoughts stammered briefly. She could feel her heartbeat in her ears, a faint, unsteady rhythm beneath the dull throb of her headache.

 

Nope. She wasn’t doing this right now.

 

Before her mind could spiral any further, she shut the thoughts down—slammed them down—and forced herself to speak.

 

With a nonchalant shrug, she muttered, “Sure.”

 

Her voice was flat, intentionally dismissive. She kept her eyes half-lidded, trying to feign disinterest, as if the sight of him standing there didn’t have her stomach flipping.

 

N’s eyes softened in response, and he nodded with a small, appreciative smile before slipping into the seat beside her.

 

As he sat, the weight of his presence settled beside her—his shoulder just barely brushing hers, the warmth of him unexpectedly close.

 

For a brief moment, Uzi stared stiffly ahead, feeling the strange, subtle awareness of how near he was. Her fingers tightened around her phone, still resting in her lap.

 

Then, casually, he glanced at her again. His voice was light, genuine, when he asked, “So… how’re you doing?”

 

He was being polite, or at least she assumed so. Small talk. Normal conversation. That’s all it was.

 

But the question still made a pit form in her stomach

 

Her eyes flicked toward him, watching the way his gaze rested on her with quiet sincerity. There was no teasing edge, no superficial politeness—it was just a simple, honest question.

 

Her chest tightened faintly with a dull, inexplicable frustration.

 

She let out a sharp sigh through her nose and muttered flatly, “Like shit.” Her voice was low and blunt, the words escaping before she could soften them. She didn’t mean to sound so short—it was just that she felt like shit. And she didn’t have the energy to sugarcoat it.

 

N’s brows lifted slightly, the easy smile on his face faltering just a little. His expression softened into something somewhat  concerned, his eyes narrowing slightly with a quiet sort of attentiveness.

 

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice lighter now, but with a distinct gentleness—genuinely curious.

 

Uzi stiffened, feeling an odd heat stir in her chest at the subtle care in his voice.

 

She averted her eyes, unable to hold his gaze. Instead, she brought a hand to her face, rubbing at her temple with slow, weary circles. The dull pounding in her skull was relentless, a slow, heavy ache pressing behind her eyes.

 

She muttered tiredly, “Just have a killer headache. And it’s way too early for this.” Her voice was low and faintly hoarse, weighed down by the lingering drowsiness and discomfort still clinging to her.

 

N’s expression turned to understanding, the faint crease in his brow deepening slightly.

 

“Sorry to hear that,” he murmured sincerely, his voice quiet. “Hope you feel better soon.”

 

His tone was soft, his words simple, but there was a warmth in them that caught her slightly off guard.

 

For a fleeting moment, her chest felt oddly tight—her breath catching faintly at the gentle sincerity in his voice.

 

He paused briefly, as if thinking, then tilted his head slightly. His voice was light, almost casual, but still genuinely considerate when he asked, “You, uh… drink any water today?”

 

The question was so simple—so unexpectedly thoughtful—that she blinked at him, puzzled.

 

The warmth in his voice lingered, steady and undemanding, but still genuinely concerned.

 

And for a moment, despite her headache and her lingering exhaustion, she could feel her heart doing that stupid, fluttery thing in her chest again.

 

Uzi stared at N for a brief moment, her eyes slightly narrowed with lingering exhaustion. She could still feel the dull throb behind her temples—a slow, relentless pounding that made her head feel heavy. The last thing she wanted right now was to hold a conversation.

 

Her eyes drifted slightly downward, barely meeting his gaze. Then, with a half-hearted shrug, she muttered, “I dunno.”

 

Her voice was low, distant, barely above a murmur. She didn’t really care enough to think about it, nor did she have the energy to. And honestly? She genuinely couldn’t remember if she’d had any water today—which probably meant she hadn’t.

 

N didn’t seem put off by her lethargic response. Instead, he tilted his head slightly, his expression softening. For a brief second, he seemed to hesitate, his eyes flickering with faint uncertainty. Then, with a small, sheepish smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, he asked lightly, “Want some?”

 

His voice was casual—almost hesitant—but still laced with that same gentle, unassuming sincerity. His eyes lingered on hers, soft and patient, as if quietly offering her the choice without any pressure.

 

That damn smile.

 

Uzi could feel her chest clench faintly, her stomach twisting with something sharp and frustratingly unfamiliar. It wasn’t fair—the way his expression softened with such subtle warmth. The way his voice dipped just slightly when he spoke to her, gentle and considerate.

 

Why did he have to be so—

 

She forced the thought away with an internal scowl, hating the way her pulse stuttered traitorously in her throat.

 

She wasn’t angry at him. She couldn’t be.

 

No, she was angry at herself—for feeling this way.

 

For feeling her chest tighten every time he smiled at her like that. For the heat that kept crawling up her neck whenever she accidentally caught his eyes lingering on hers for a second too long. For the way her entire brain seemed to short-circuit at the smallest display of kindness from him.

 

It wasn’t his fault. It was hers.

 

Her fingers curled faintly into the hem of her hoodie sleeve, gripping the fabric tightly. She willed herself to exhale sharply through her nose, feigning irritation to cover the heat rising in her face.

 

Without looking at him, she shook her head slightly and muttered, “No.”

 

Her voice was flat, dismissive.

 

She kept her eyes averted, as if refusing to meet his gaze would somehow make the tension in her chest dissipate. Then, slowly, she slumped further into her seat and rested her head against the back of it, closing her eyes briefly.

 

From the corner of her vision, she saw N nod. His expression was unreadable—calm, but slightly subdued.

 

He didn’t say anything else.

 

Instead, he simply turned his eyes toward the window, clearly getting the hint. He didn’t press her, didn’t ask any further questions. He just fell into a quiet, unintrusive silence.

 

And somehow, that only made her chest feel heavier.

 

For a brief moment, she hated how considerate he was. How he always seemed to know when to give her space—when to back off.

 

Because it meant that she could feel the warmth of his presence beside her—the subtle, familiar weight of him so close—and still feel the tension simmering quietly beneath her skin.

 

The bus rumbled quietly beneath her, its steady vibrations creating a faint, numbing hum in her chest. Yet, no matter how monotonous the ride was, Uzi couldn’t settle.

 

The silence between her and N, while not unpleasant, was slowly driving her restless. The longer she sat there, the more irritable she felt.

 

Her headache was still continuously pounding at the base of her skull—a dull, throbbing ache that made her temples feel heavy. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, willing the pain away, but it didn’t help. She just felt gross. Stifled. Like the discomfort was pressing down on her from the inside out.

 

And somehow, the presence of N right next to her—the subtle weight of him, the faint warmth of him so close—made it all feel worse. Not because she didn’t want him there. But because she was so frustratingly aware of him, of every tiny movement he made, and she hated that she couldn’t bring herself to say anything.

 

Her fingers toyed idly with the hem of her hoodie sleeve, her grip occasionally tightening around the fabric. She didn’t even know what she wanted to say—just that the quiet felt too heavy.

 

But she couldn’t seem to push the words out.

 

Her jaw tightened slightly in frustration. She swallowed against the dryness in her throat, trying to distract herself. But the silence only seemed to grow louder.

 

Finally, she caved.

 

She told herself she’d just sneak a glance. Just for a second. Just to look at him. She wasn’t going to say anything—she just… needed to see him.

 

Cautiously, she turned her head ever so slightly, peeking out from beneath her hair.

 

N was sitting casually beside her, his phone held loosely in his hand. His thumb lazily scrolled through the screen, flipping through random short videos on social media.

 

She watched him swipe past a couple of unremarkable clips—ones he clearly wasn’t interested in—until he landed on one that made him pause.

 

It was a video of a dog clumsily skidding across a hardwood floor, its legs flailing awkwardly as it struggled to stop. N’s eyes brightened slightly, and the corner of his mouth twitched upward.

 

A light, barely stifled chuckle escaped him.

 

Then, as he swiped to the next video, he smiled again.

 

It was soft, almost absentminded—the kind of genuine, unguarded expression that slipped out without him realizing. The quiet, easy happiness in it made his face seem somehow lighter. Warmer.

 

Uzi’s chest tightened.

 

Even though she didn’t want it to.

 

She didn’t want to feel the small tug in her gut—the involuntary flutter that stirred at the sound of his quiet laugh. She didn’t want to catch herself lingering on the way the corners of his eyes crinkled just slightly when he smiled, or how the dim light from his phone illuminated the side of his face, making the soft curve of his features look almost golden.

 

But she did.

 

And worse, she felt the corner of her own mouth threatening to tug upward.

 

Her lips twitched faintly, almost without her permission, and for a brief, fleeting second, she wanted to smile.

 

But she couldn’t.

 

No. She wouldn’t.

 

Her stomach knotted in defiance, and she bit the inside of her cheek—harshly.

 

The sharp pinch of it kept her face neutral, grounding her. She forced her expression into something flat and unaffected, as if the small, stupid warmth she felt hadn’t been there at all.

 

It was nothing, she told herself firmly.

 

Just him being his usual, dorky self.

 

Nothing more.

 

Uzi was just about to look away—to tear her gaze from N and force herself to stare back out the window, to focus on anything but him—when she noticed it.

 

His hand.

 

It rested loosely in the space between them, palm down, fingers slightly curled against the fabric of his pants. His grip was relaxed, unoccupied. Unintentional.

 

It wasn’t too close to her—just barely near enough to notice—but not far enough that it would’ve felt deliberate. He wasn’t offering it to her. Wasn’t expecting anything.

 

He was just… sitting there. Unaware.

 

Uzi’s breath caught slightly in her throat.

 

For a brief, fleeting moment, she considered looking away. She should look away. She told herself she would.

 

But she didn’t.

 

Instead, her eyes stayed locked on his hand, her gaze flickering to the outline of his fingers—the faint, almost imperceptible shift when he flexed them slightly, as if idly stretching them without thought.

 

Her own hand twitched ever so slightly in her lap.

 

She felt something stir in her chest—some quiet, nagging impulse. Her stomach knotted, and she tried to ignore it. She told herself she was just tired. She wasn’t thinking clearly. The headache was making her stupid.

 

But her hand had already moved before she could convince herself otherwise.

 

Slowly, cautiously, she reached out.

 

Her fingers hovered uncertainly over his for half a second, her movements hesitant and unsure. Her heart fluttered once—hard—against her ribs.

 

And then, before she could stop herself, she closed the distance.

 

Her hand slipped tentatively over his, lightly curling around it.

 

The contact was featherlight at first—uncertain. Her fingers barely brushed against his knuckles, as if testing if he would react. But then, as she exhaled softly through her nose, and grabbed his hand gently. She tightened her grip just slightly, letting her hand settle around his more firmly.

 

She held her breath, bracing herself for something—anything.

 

Maybe he’d look at her in confusion, pulling away without meaning to. Or maybe he’d tense slightly, unsure what to make of it. Maybe he’d—

 

But he didn’t.

 

Instead, without so much as glancing up from his phone, N’s fingers shifted against hers.

 

And then, almost instinctively, he returned her grip.

 

The pads of his fingers pressed gently against the back of her hand, and she felt him lightly grasp her fingers, holding her hand with a natural, easy gentleness.

 

Uzi blinked once, caught slightly off guard.

 

For a split second, she thought maybe he hadn’t noticed what he was doing. Maybe it was just a reflex. Maybe he was so distracted by the video playing on his screen that he hadn’t even registered it.

 

But then, he glanced at her.

 

His eyes flicked softly in her direction, his expression calm and unbothered.

 

And he smiled.

 

A small, subtle smile—barely more than a faint tug at the corner of his mouth—but unmistakably warm. Genuine.

 

Then, without a word, he turned his eyes back to his phone.

 

Her chest tightened.

 

Her fingers twitched faintly in his grip, as if half-expecting him to loosen his hold. But he didn’t.

 

Instead, he did something else.

 

Without looking up, without shifting or fidgeting, he lightly brushed his thumb over the back of her hand.

 

Once.

 

Twice.

 

A slow, soothing back-and-forth motion, absentminded and unhurried.

 

The touch was light—barely more than a faint, idle stroke—but it made her breath catch.

 

Her throat suddenly felt too tight.

 

She stared at him—her eyes wide and unmoving—as though expecting him to glance back at her, to offer some kind of explanation for the way he was so… casual about it.

 

But he didn’t.

 

He just sat there, smiling at his phone, occasionally suppressing a quiet chuckle when another dog video played.

 

Completely unfazed.

 

As though holding her hand was the most natural thing in the world.

 

Uzi’s stomach twisted sharply with something she couldn’t name.

 

Her face felt warm again—embarrassingly so—but she couldn’t bring herself to pull away. She didn’t want to pull away.

 

Instead, she shifted slightly in her seat, leaning just a little closer to him.

 

And quietly, her fingers eased more comfortably into his, letting her hand settle into his grip fully.

 

Her eyes softened faintly, her head lowering slightly as she let her cheek rest lightly against the window.

 

And despite the dull throb of her headache still lingering behind her eyes, she felt herself gradually relax.

 

For the first time that morning, her chest felt a little lighter.

 

The bus rolled to a stop with a low, mechanical groan, the subtle jolt barely registering in Uzi’s dazed state. She didn’t move at first.

 

Her face was still pressed lightly against the cool window, her breath fogging the glass faintly with each exhale. Her eyes were half-lidded, heavy with that strange, dream like exhaustion that made it feel as though she were hovering right on the edge of sleep.

 

But she hadn’t fallen asleep—not quite. She was still awake, still aware of the faint hum of the engine beneath her and the soft murmur of voices from the front of the bus as the other drones shuffled out.

 

Her hand was still in N’s.

 

Her fingers were still loosely intertwined with his, their hands resting comfortably in the space between them. At some point, without either of them acknowledging it, their fingers had naturally interlocked, their grips unconsciously adjusting until they fit together with ease.

 

His thumb was still tracing slow, absentminded strokes over the back of her hand.

 

The touch was so featherlight, so gentle and rhythmic, it was almost lulling. The slow, soothing motion made her stomach twist, fluttering with that unfamiliar warmth—the same one she’d been fighting against all morning.

 

And still, she didn’t let go.

 

She found herself lightly squeezing his hand again, tightening her fingers around his ever so slightly, almost as if seeking some form of reassurance without realizing it.

 

His grip responded in kind, firming slightly against hers, wordless but certain. Steady.

 

Her eyes softened a little, and despite herself, she almost smiled.

 

Her headache was still there, but it had dulled slightly, the sharp, throbbing pangs easing into something more muted, less unbearable. She felt a little more… at ease.

 

For the first time that day, she didn’t feel like her chest was so painfully tight.

 

The other drones shuffled out of the bus in small clusters, their steps clattering lightly against the metal floor as they made their way down the aisle.

 

But Uzi barely noticed.

 

She only glanced up when the flow of movement caught her eye, her gaze flickering toward the front of the bus where the other students were disembarking.

 

She blinked once, disoriented. She hadn’t even realized they’d arrived.

 

Her eyes darted toward N again.

 

And then, slowly, he began to move.

 

Without a word, he gave her hand one last, gentle squeeze—firm enough for her to feel it, brief but lingering—and then, almost reluctantly, he let go.

 

Her fingers twitched faintly in the empty space he left behind, still tingling from the warmth of his hand.

 

She barely had time to process it before he stood, turning toward her with a small, soft smile.

 

“Come on,” he said lightly, his voice low and easy.

 

His tone was casual, as if nothing had happened. As if the entire ride—their hands, the way he’d held hers so effortlessly, so thoughtlessly—wasn’t even worth acknowledging.

 

But his eyes lingered on hers, steady and warm, with that same faint, unspoken gentleness he always had.

 

For half a second, Uzi just stared at him.

 

Her throat tightened slightly, and she found she didn’t have any words to offer him.

 

All she could do was nod slightly, feeling her face flush again.

 

Silently, she reached down and grabbed her backpack off the floor.

 

She slung it around her shoulder with a single, swift motion, the weight settling against her back, then stood up.

 

Her legs felt a little unsteady—not shaky, just… oddly light. The lingering warmth of his hand still clung faintly to her palm, her fingers lightly flexing against the empty space where his had been.

 

Without a word, she followed him down the narrow aisle.

 

Her eyes stayed focused on the floor ahead of her, trailing just slightly behind him, but her thoughts remained entirely on the fleeting, phantom sensation of his hand still wrapped around hers.

 

And she wasn’t sure whether she wanted it to linger… or to fade.

Notes:

AHH this chapter was so cute omg

I feel so bad for Uzi having a headache at 7 in the morning, that’s like the worse thing ever 🥲

Anyways, a *LOT* more stuff is abt to happen within the next few chapters (and a bit of angst too… just you wait 😈)

And finally after like a million chapters they’re gonna be back at school and stuff

Super excited for what’s to come!!!

No chapter tomorrow cuz I don’t post on Sunday 😢 bear with me

Stay tuned for the next chapter on Monday!!!!! Bye for now 🫶

Edit: OH ALSO it’s been officially 2 months since I posted the first chapter. Isn’t that crazy????!!!?! I still don’t know when it’s gonna end. Hopefully before 100 chapters but who knows 😭💔 Once I finish this fic, I have another one already planned (not a murder drones one sadly 💔) but YEAH super excited for that too. But, for now, I gotta focus on finishing this fic!!!

 

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 55: Deadpan

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The first half of the day had dragged on with unbearable slowness, every ticking minute stretching thin like warm tar. Uzi barely remembered what any of her teachers had said. Their voices had blended into a dull, background hum, like static behind glass.

 

Her mind kept drifting—slipping out from under her like a faulty gear, her thoughts pulling her in a direction she stubbornly tried to resist. But no matter how hard she pushed back, no matter how often she told herself to focus, to stop thinking about him, her mind would still find its way back to N.

 

It wasn’t like she wanted to. It just… happened.

 

Flashes of the morning bus ride flooded back at the worst times: the way he’d looked at her, that faint smile that had made her insides twist, the warmth of his hand still ghosting faintly in her palm. She hated how easily she could remember the exact rhythm of his thumb brushing over her skin.

 

It was getting harder to pretend it hadn’t meant anything.

 

By the time lunch finally rolled around, Uzi felt like her brain had been scraped raw. The halls were loud as always, a swarm of students pouring in every direction like a chaotic current, but Uzi knew how to navigate it. She weaved through the crowd with practiced ease, her expression fixed in that usual deadpan focus.

 

As she neared her usual lunch spot, her eyes scanned to the wall close by the vending machines

 

Her group was already there.

 

Thad was leaning back against the wall with his arms crossed, like he owned the place, laughing too loudly at something Darren had said. Rebecca was mid-rant about some teacher, gesturing animatedly while Emily nodded with a knowing grin.

 

And then there was N.

 

He was there, too—sitting quietly with his tray untouched, one hand curled loosely around a water bottle while he listened to the others talk.

 

Everyone was here. No one missing today.

 

Uzi’s steps slowed slightly, and for a moment, she just stood there, watching the scene from a distance.

 

They looked so normal, so comfortably familiar—and yet, the sight of him there, so casual and relaxed, made something flutter sharply in her chest again.

 

She’d arrived late, clearly, but not late enough to skip this part. Not late enough to avoid him.

 

And truthfully, she didn’t know if that made her feel relieved… or more on edge.

 

As Uzi made her way over to the spot, the group was deep in conversation, laughter overlapping with the clatter of plastic trays and crinkling snack wrappers. She caught the tail end of Thad’s animated voice cutting through the chatter—something about the party being “insane in the best way possible,” said with the kind of enthusiasm only Thad could muster.

 

She gave a lazy wave as she slid into her usual spot against the wall next to Thad. It was the spot she always gravitated toward like it was instinct. No one batted an eye at her quiet entrance; they were all close enough now that she didn’t need some big announcement to join in. She belonged here.

 

Emily was just beginning to answer Thad’s remark when Uzi casually cut in, her tone dry but curious. “What’d Emily say?”

 

She had already begun unzipping her lunch bag, not even glancing up as she asked. Her fingers moved on autopilot, pulling out a sandwich and a crumpled packet of chips while Emily turned toward her.

 

“I was just asking how the party went,” Emily said, brushing her bangs from her eyes. “Since I didn’t go.”

 

Uzi let out a quiet scoff, not even trying to hide the smirk tugging at the corner of her mouth. “Consider yourself lucky.”

 

Emily blinked in confusion, brows slightly raised like she was waiting for an explanation—but before she could even get a word out, Thad jumped in.

 

“Oh, please,” he said with a dramatic wave of his hand. “You’re just lame and don’t know how to have fun.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes hard, not even trying to play nice. “Yeah, well, my idea of ‘fun’ doesn’t involve getting so wasted I forget how to speak.”

 

Thad gasped like she’d just slapped him, hand to his chest in mock offense. “Wow. Okay. Rude. I wasn’t that drunk.”

 

Sitting in the small circle the group formed, across from Thad, Rebecca let out a sharp laugh, practically throwing herself into the moment. “Dude. Didn’t you just say you threw up so hard from your hangover you could barely stand yesterday morning?”

 

Thad blinked, then gave a helpless shrug, caught red-handed. “Alright, okay, but it wasn’t that bad.”

 

Uzi gave a flat “Mhm,” not bothering to mask the skepticism in her voice. She took a bite of her sandwich, shaking her head slightly in amusement, while the others snickered and kept the teasing alive.

 

It was moments like these—bickering, jabs passed back and forth with ease—that made the group feel so real. But even as she engaged, part of her still felt aware… like she couldn’t quite relax. Not entirely. Not with N sitting just a few feet away.

 

Uzi leaned forward slightly, sandwich half-forgotten in her hand, and leveled a skeptical look at Thad. “How much of the party do you even remember, anyway?”

 

Thad sucked in a breath through his teeth, eyes widening just a bit, as if the realization had only just hit him. He hesitated, then gave a sheepish shrug. “Not… much, honestly.”

 

Darren let out a short laugh, shaking his head as he leaned on the table with one elbow. “Way to go, champ.”

 

A faint flush crept up Thad’s face—probably from embarrassment. He opened his mouth, tried to defend himself, stammered over the first syllable, and then blurted out, “I remember some stuff! Like—like when everyone was playing seven minutes in heaven!”

 

Uzi froze.

 

Her hand clenched slightly around her sandwich, and for a moment, everything around her felt like static. He better not. Not here. Not in front of everyone. Her thoughts turned sharp, her annoyance flaring as her body went rigid. She was already trying to untangle her thoughts about that night—the last thing she needed was for Thad to remind everyone—to drag it into the open like it was some joke.

 

And then she saw it—that flicker in Thad’s eyes. He was looking right at her.

 

Crap.

 

He had noticed. Her reaction, that slight shift in posture, the tension—he’d picked up on it. And of course, being Thad, he leaned into it.

 

A smug grin stretched across his face like he’d just solved some great mystery. “Didn’t you get picked for a round, Uzi?”

 

Her eyes narrowed, and without a word, she shoved him—hard enough to make him loose his balance and almost fall over, but not quite enough to be considered assault. “Shut up, Thad.”

 

Thad’s grin only widened, because of course it did. “Come on,” he teased, leaning towards her now, “Who was it again? I can’t seem to recall…” He finished his sentence with a smirk.

 

Uzi’s eyes darted—just for a second—involuntarily, stupidly, toward N.

 

He hadn’t said anything yet, but he clearly noticed. His gaze flicked to hers, then away again, and he gave the barest, most helpless shrug. Like he didn’t know what to say, or maybe didn’t want to say anything at all.

 

Before the tension could thicken further, Rebecca spoke, voice perfectly casual as she looked up from her salad. “Wasn’t it N?”

 

Uzi felt her stomach twist.

 

Her fingers tightened around the edge of her lunch bag as her thoughts began to spiral again, heat prickling at the back of her neck. Why now? Why did this have to come up now, when she had finally started to calm down?

 

She didn’t look at N again. She couldn’t.

 

When Rebecca casually dropped N’s name, Uzi’s attention wasn’t on N—or even on herself. It was on Thad. She caught it—a flash, barely a second long. Something subtle crossed his face, like a hiccup in his usual smug confidence. His expression faltered, just briefly—eyes widening a touch, brow twitching. There was confusion there, for sure, but beneath it... was that concern? No, it couldn’t have been. That wasn’t Thad’s style. Still, whatever it was, it flickered across his features and vanished so quickly she almost second-guessed whether she’d even seen it.

 

Before he could say anything, Darren let out a short laugh, amused and oblivious. “Dude. That’s hilarious.”

 

Uzi’s glare snapped to him immediately, sharp and unyielding. “It’s not funny,” she said through her teeth flatly, voice steely.

 

Darren raised an eyebrow, unfazed. He leaned back slightly in his seat with a casual shrug. “Okay, okay—don’t bite my head off. You’re being dramatic.”

 

That did it.

 

Her fingers twitched around her sandwich like she might actually hurl it across the group. It was taking every ounce of her willpower not to. Instead, she clenched her jaw and exhaled through her nose like she was containing an internal explosion.

 

Dramatic? Dramatic?

 

Okay, sure. Maybe she had been reacting a little intensely. She had tensed up like someone had sounded an air raid siren just by mentioning a stupid closet. Maybe she had acted like she was about to be publicly executed. But still—Darren didn’t get it. None of them did.

 

They hadn’t been in that closet. They hadn’t felt what she felt. That strange mix of tension and warmth, that sudden, disarming intimacy she hadn’t expected and still wasn’t ready to name. Darren could laugh all he wanted—he didn’t know a thing. So who was he to talk? Who was he to act like this was all just some funny little moment they could joke about over lunch?

 

Her thoughts boiled, hot and restless, the memory of N’s quiet smile still sitting far too close to the surface. And all the while, she could feel the back of her neck burning again.

 

Before Uzi could open her mouth and fire something scathing back at Darren, Rebecca beat her to it. She gave Darren a playful shove, her expression light, unbothered. “Oh, leave her alone,” she said with a teasing lilt, her voice free of any real bite. “I get why she’s freaked out.”

 

Uzi’s glare shifted, narrowing on Rebecca now—confused, cautious. What do you mean, you get it?

 

Rebecca caught the look and continued, gesturing vaguely with her hands as if laying out an obvious truth. “I’d be worried too if I got picked for something like that,” she said, shrugging. “Especially since Lizzy was the one who set it up.”

 

Darren blinked, brows pulling together in genuine confusion. “Wait—what? What’s Lizzy got to do with it?”

 

Rebecca sighed, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. She leaned forward a bit, “Lizzy picked that game out of everything she could’ve gone with, right? That wasn’t a random choice. She did it to stir the pot—start drama.”

 

Thad arched a brow, folding his arms and leaning back. “Okay, but how would that start drama?” he asked, tone skeptical but curious.

 

Rebecca gave him a deadpan look, unimpressed. “Easy. Rumors.” She tapped the table for emphasis. “It puts drones in a position where everyone’s gonna start whispering about what might’ve happened. And imagine if it was me,” she added, motioning to herself. “Me and Darren are together. What if I got shoved into a closet with some random guy? You really think drones wouldn’t start talking?”

 

Darren leaned back slightly, going quiet for a second before nodding thoughtfully. “Yeah... no, you’re right. That would’ve looked bad.”

 

Uzi watched all of this unfold, unsure whether she felt validated or more paranoid now. Because—yes, okay, that had been her exact fear. And hearing Rebecca voice it so plainly just made it all the more real. This hadn’t just been an overreaction. She wasn’t imagining it. There really were eyes watching her, whispering behind her back. And she hated it.

 

Uzi felt her chest tighten slightly, a low flicker of panic rising in her. What if Rebecca was right? What if that stupid game had planted the perfect seed for gossip, and now her and N’s names were floating around the school hallways, whispered behind cupped hands and smirking faces? The idea made her stomach twist. She didn’t even realize she’d spoken until the words were already out of her mouth.

 

“Do you think drones are gonna start rumors about me?” she asked, her voice a little too quick, a little too sharp.

 

Rebecca looked over at her with a shrug, calm and unbothered. “I wouldn’t stress about it,” she said lightly. “I mean, come on—when the door opened, it’s not like you guys were making out or anything.”

 

Uzi tensed.

 

That wasn’t entirely true. Her memory flashed back to the closet—the dim lighting, the cramped space, N’s hand finding hers in the dark, the quiet, tentative kisses they’d exchanged. The butterflies. The tension. The way her heart had raced like it was trying to leap from her chest. But then… voices. Someone had been walking past the door, and she’d reacted on pure instinct—pushing N away, adjusting herself like nothing had happened. By the time Lizzy swung the door open with that smug smile of hers, it probably looked like the two of them hadn’t even spoken the whole time.

 

That thought, strangely, brought her a bit of relief.

 

Still, she hesitated. “Are you… sure?”

 

Rebecca glanced back at her, taking a bite of a strawberry before answering. “Yeah, Uzi. You’re good. No one’s saying anything. Not that I’ve heard, at least.” Her tone was easygoing, almost dismissive in a comforting way. “Seriously, no one even cares that much. Everyone was probably too busy nursing their hangovers or trying to remember who they texted. If something had actually happened between you two, maybe drones would be talking about it. But, more notable things happened afterwards, obviously not involving you, that are way more interesting to talk about.”

 

Uzi wasn’t sure if she fully believed her—but she wanted to. And on that note… Rebecca, or anyone else for that matter, didn’t know the half of it. No one had caught them, as far as she knew, so then maybe Rebecca was right. She had a point that other things probably happened between other drones after she left the party, so why would anyone be focused on her and N? With that realization, Her shoulders eased just a little, the tension unwinding ever so slightly. Maybe she was overthinking it again. Maybe it didn’t matter. Maybe… no one saw what really happened. Maybe the moment could just stay between her and N.

 

Still, the weight of that memory lingered. A secret tucked neatly beneath her surface—one she wasn’t sure how to carry yet.

 

Emily leaned back, placing her hands on the floor behind her. She raised an eyebrow, “Honestly? I’m glad I didn’t go,” she said with a light scoff, her tone laced with secondhand exhaustion. “That party sounds like it was a total nightmare.”

 

Uzi huffed a dry breath through her nose “Tell me about it,” she muttered, her voice flat but weary. Her thoughts briefly flicked back to the headache, the chaos, the closet—yeah, nightmare was a pretty accurate word.

 

Still, she didn’t feel like lingering in that memory anymore. She shifted in her seat and glanced toward Rebecca. “So,” she started, casually, hoping to steer things into safer waters, “what was it like after I left?”

 

Rebecca blinked, her eyes drifting upward as she thought. “Hmm…” she began, her voice thoughtful, “We played a few more rounds of Seven Minutes in Heaven… until everyone started getting bored of it.” She gave a short laugh, brushing a piece of hair behind her ear. “Honestly, I was pretty tipsy the whole time, so the party probably seemed more fun than it actually was.”

 

Uzi gave a small, distracted nod, the edge of her mouth twitching upward slightly. She could imagine Rebecca laughing at something that wasn’t funny or dancing in the middle of the room like there was music playing even when there wasn’t. That kind of blurry, harmless fun.

 

Rebecca continued after a moment. “After that, it just turned into everyone kinda hanging around. Talking. Wandering. Nothing too exciting.”

 

“Except,” Darren cut in with a grin, “that one guy who passed out on the couch.”

 

Uzi glanced at him, raising a brow.

 

Darren laughed, shoulders shaking as he recalled the moment. “Some drones grabbed a marker and drew all over his face. Like—full-on mustache, unibrow, the works.” He mimed scribbling on his own face, snorting at the memory. “I took a bunch of photos, I gotta show you later.”

 

Rebecca chuckled, shaking her head with amusement, while Emily muttered something like “poor guy” between bites of food.

 

Uzi, however, found herself oddly distant from the laughter. It wasn’t that she didn’t find it amusing—she probably would have laughed right along with them if her head wasn’t still halfway lost in the events of the weekend. Everything still felt like a haze, like the party was happening on some other planet, and she had just dropped in for a short, uncomfortable visit.

 

Darren leaned back in his chair, shifting his gaze toward N with an easy, curious smile. “Hey, where did you disappear to?” he asked, voice light, casual—just one drone to another recounting the events. “You dipped halfway through the party. V was trying to find you.”

 

The words hit Uzi like a punch to the gut.

 

She froze mid-motion, her fingers halting just above her sandwich. A subtle chill crept up her spine. Oh no. Her eyes shot toward N instantly, wide with warning, almost like she could telepathically will him not to say anything. Not now. Not here. If he said even one word about coming back with her—about being in her house overnight—it would sound... really, really bad. Way worse than it actually was.

 

N’s gaze flicked to her for just a second, catching her expression—somewhere between anxious and pleading—and that seemed to be all the cue he needed. He looked back at Darren, stammering briefly. “Uh—yeah, no, I was just really tired,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck with a sheepish smile. “So I left early.”

 

Darren raised an eyebrow, tilting his head in curiosity. “Huh. Then why’d you leave your car in the driveway?” His tone wasn’t suspicious, just genuinely puzzled.

 

Uzi’s stomach twisted.

 

N blinked. For a moment, his mouth parted like he didn’t have a ready answer—like he was scrambling to remember the version of events that didn’t include Uzi. Uzi’s heart was pounding now, each beat feeling loud in her ears. Please don’t mess this up.

 

Then N finally replied, his voice casual but laced with a nervous chuckle. “Oh. Yeah. I, uh, accidentally ate a weed brownie. Didn't wanna risk driving, so I just took the bus home instead.”

 

Uzi nearly sagged in relief. She didn’t show it, but inwardly, she was practically collapsing against the wall behind her. That was what had happened. N hadn’t lied—he’d just... skillfully dodged the rest of the truth. The part that mattered. The part that would've made her crawl under a table nearby and stay there for the rest of lunch.

 

She let out a quiet breath through her nose, finally lowering her gaze back to her food, her nerves still simmering just under her skin. N had her back. He hadn’t said a word about her. Thank robo-god.

 

Thad let out a bark of laughter that practically echoed off the walls. He slapped his knee with one hand, grinning like an idiot. “Dude—how the hell do you accidentally eat a weed brownie?”

 

N shrunk a little under the attention, offering a sheepish smile as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I dunno,” he said, trying not to sound completely ridiculous. “Some drone was passing them out, and they looked good, so I just… grabbed one. I didn’t know they were those kind of brownies.”

 

Thad laughed harder, leaning against the table as if the weight of his own amusement might knock him over. “That’s amazing,” he said, snorting. “That’s, like, straight-up cartoon levels of oblivious.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes, but she wasn’t looking at Thad—she was watching N. He looked flustered, but not upset, like he could laugh at himself even if he was clearly embarrassed by it all.

 

Darren jumped into the conversation, tilting his head thoughtfully. “Wait—was it Sam who gave it to you?”

 

N blinked, clearly trying to remember. “Uh... I have no idea,” he admitted, holding up his hands. “I didn’t catch his name. I’ve seen him a few times a school before—he always wears a beanie. Oh—and he’s friends with V.”

 

“That’s probably Sam,” Darren confirmed, snickering. “And that would track anyways, though. Everyone knows he’s a total stoner. Of course he’d be the one walking around handing out baked edibles like party favors.”

 

Uzi’s jaw clenched ever so slightly at that name.

 

Sam.

 

Even just hearing it made her skin crawl a little. She didn’t like that guy. She hadn’t from the start—there was just something off about him. Smug, lazy, like he never cared about anything but still wanted attention. Even though she already knew he was the one who got N high without warning, it still made her stomach churn.

 

And yet… she didn’t have any solid reason to hate him. He hadn’t done anything directly to her. But maybe that’s what made it worse—he didn’t have to. Just the fact that he’d handed N something like that so casually, not even bothering to mention it to him… it left a bitter taste in her mouth. She didn’t like the thought of N being put in that situation, especially not by someone like that.

 

Uzi stayed quiet, but her glare lingered on the table in front of her, her grip on her water bottle tightening slightly as she stewed in her own quiet resentment.

 

Just as Thad opened his mouth—no doubt to unleash another round of teasing or some half-baked joke—the sharp trill of the bell sliced through the cafeteria, abrupt and unwelcome. A collective groan rippled through the group, and Uzi let out a sigh as she began gathering what little remained of her lunch. She crammed the rest of it back into her bag with a little more force than necessary, irritation from the conversation still lingering faintly in her chest.

 

Around her, everyone else began packing up as well then standing up, chatter fading into the background hum of drones moving on autopilot toward their next class. Emily slung her bag over one shoulder, tossing a quick, “See ya,” to no one in particular. Darren offered a casual nod, while Rebecca waved lazily, already half-turned to go. Even Thad, still grinning, threw up a hand in parting before heading off with his usual unbothered swagger.

 

Uzi rose from her seat, adjusting her backpack and blinking once as the lunchroom lights felt just a bit too bright for her still-tired eyes. No one lingered; they all slipped into the current of the hallway traffic without much thought, their voices quickly absorbed into the rising murmur of returning routine.

Uzi followed suit, her mind still humming—not with the conversations just had, but with the thoughts she hadn’t yet found the words for.

Notes:

SIODBAIFJAHKD I LOVE THIS CHAPTER

Finallyyy the gang is back together

I love writing all of their interactions it’s so fun

Edit: Another thing I never like, js outright said, was how the group sits at lunch. Basically they all sit in a circle on the floor by the vending machines instead of a table. Idk if anyone was confused abt this, but I might as well clarify anyways.

In other news, let’s talk abt the poll I posted yesterday

I’m gonna keep it up until the end of this day to see if anyone else has anymore input, but I made a decision

Incase anyone is reading this chapter in the future: Basically I posted a poll yesterday to see where the story is gonna go. The characters are gonna go on a field trip, and my two options were either a camping trip or a historical city trip where they’re gonna stay in a hotel

You’ll never guess which one got more votes 💔

THE HOTEL ONE like #sorry to the people who wanted the camping thing but for the most part almost everyone who commented liked the hotel idea better

Someone made a really good point that the camping thing is kind of like a trend with the MD fandom cuz like, obvi there’s a whole episode

So a bunch of people said to “shake things up” with them going to the historic city trip thing where they stay in a hotel

AHHHH that’s gonna be so fun. I wrote down like a rough outline on where I want things to go with it, so I’m like super excited.

***ONE QUESTION THOUGH*** here’s like a mini poll ig. I’m debating on weather to have the rooms be 4 to a room, 5 to a room, or 6 to a room. I’m thinking more on 5 since I have a good idea for like, the room set ups, but I still wanna ask cuz I’m really not sure which one would be better. So what do yall wanna see? If more people say 4 or 6 I’ll go with that, I think any one of them would work out.

Ok that’s pretty much all I have to say. If anyone has any more input on this, I’d love to hear y’all’s thoughts.

OK BYE next chapter will be posted tomorrow 🫶

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 56: Warning

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi made her way down the hallway at a steady pace, the shuffle of drones around her fading into white noise as she kept her gaze forward, trying—no, willing—her thoughts to quiet down. She tried to focus on anything but him. She should think about schoolwork, maybe. Yeah, that should’ve been her priority.

 

Oh, who was she kidding?! She never cared about schoolwork, not even when deadlines were looming like dark clouds above her head. She might as well just give up and admit that her mind was hopelessly tangled.

 

A low, silent groan escaped her as she reached her locker. She spun the dial of the lock with muscle memory alone, twisting the combination with practiced apathy. The metal clicked open, and she yanked the door aside. Inside, the usual mess greeted her—loose papers, crammed folders, a few notebooks stacked haphazardly. With a sigh, she started pulling out what she needed for her next class, stuffing it carelessly into her bag.

 

But just as she was reaching for a textbook, a voice called her name from behind.

 

“Uzi.”

 

She froze mid-motion, spine tensing instinctively at the unfamiliar tone. She turned slowly, eyebrows already drawn together in suspicion. “Yes?” she asked curtly.

 

And then she saw who it was.

 

V.

 

Uzi blinked once, expression hardening in an instant. She felt the sting of alarm rise in her chest, sharpening the edges of her voice. “What do you want?”

 

V didn’t flinch at her tone. If anything, she looked unimpressed, arms crossed over her chest, her usual air of disdain practically radiating off her.

 

But after a moment, she exhaled sharply, and spoke.

 

“It’s J.”

 

That was all she said.

 

Uzi went still, her breath caught halfway in her throat. J? Her thoughts reeled instantly, flashing back to the last conversation she'd had with V about her—the tense words, the thinly veiled threat. V had made it clear: if J found out that Uzi knew what she really was—that they were disassembly drones—then she was as good as dead. And V hadn’t sugarcoated it either. She’d said outright she wouldn’t hesitate to kill Uzi herself if not for the inconvenience it would cause her… and the fact that N had begged her not to.

 

So why now? Why bring up J?

 

Uzi's heart ticked upward, her instincts buzzing with unease, even as she tried to keep her face guarded. Something wasn’t right. Something had changed.

 

Uzi didn’t let the flicker of fear show on her face. Instead, she squared her shoulders, gripping the strap of her bag a little tighter. Her voice was cautious, sharp with suspicion. “What about J?”

 

V’s jaw tensed. She glanced briefly over her shoulder, scanning the hallway like she was making sure no one was within earshot. When she finally spoke, her voice was low—quiet, but heavy with tension.

 

“I think she’s catching on.”

 

Uzi’s stomach twisted in an instant. Her breath caught before she could hide it, and her eyes narrowed warily. Catching on? Her thoughts scrambled for meaning. “What do you mean?” she asked, trying to sound collected even as her chest began to tighten.

 

V exhaled slowly, like she didn’t want to say it out loud. “She might have figured out that you know.”

 

That hit Uzi like a slap. Her fingers tightened involuntarily around her bag strap. Her mouth opened, then closed again, like she couldn’t decide what to say first.

 

Finally, she found her voice. “How would she even know that? I’ve kept my distance. I’ve been pretending to be all buddy-buddy with you, just like you wanted.”

 

V groaned under her breath, dragging a hand down her face before pinching the bridge of her nose like she was rapidly running out of patience. “Yeah, well, J saw you leave the party with N.”

 

Uzi went rigid. Her stomach dropped.

 

Oh no.

 

That memory flashed through her mind—offering N to go home with her; N sitting with her at the bus stop, looking completely out of it; the quiet night walk to her house; …Everything that happened after. But what could J know? It’s not like she followed her or something.

 

Uzi swallowed hard, the edges of her thoughts turning jagged. “So? That doesn’t mean I know anything.”

 

“Doesn’t matter,” V snapped under her breath. “J’s not stupid. She knows you and N are getting closer. That’s all it takes for her to assume.”

 

Uzi glared, frustration beginning to simmer beneath the surface. “How does that make a difference?”

 

V turned to face her fully now, arms crossed tightly across her chest. Her eyes narrowed in irritation. “Because N talks. A lot. Especially when he gets close to someone. And the fact that he was high at the time makes it’s even worse.”

 

That made Uzi pause. Her brows furrowed as something clicked sharply into place. Slowly, she asked, “How do you know he was high?”

 

Uzi's expression hardened, thoughts suddenly spinning in another direction entirely. Her wariness wasn’t just for J anymore. Now, it was aimed squarely at V.

 

V barely hesitated before answering, her voice flat and mildly annoyed. “Me and J literally watched him eat the brownie.”

 

Uzi blinked, thrown by how casually she said it. “Oh,” she mumbled, eyes shifting to the side. What else could she even say to that?

 

But V wasn’t done. She tilted her head, irritation creeping into her voice. “What the hell were you two even doing, anyway? Where did you go?

 

Heat exploded across Uzi’s face in an instant. She fought the overwhelming urge to bury her head in her hands. Nope. Not saying a damn word about that. There was no way she was going to tell V that N had stayed over… and that they’d basically spent the rest of that night making out. Anyways, that was not V’s business!

 

V narrowed her eyes, catching the subtle twitch in Uzi’s expression. “Never mind,” she deadpanned. “I don’t wanna know about your love life.”

 

That stung. Embarrassment twisted into frustration, and Uzi’s eyes snapped back up to glare at her. “You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

 

V raised an unimpressed brow, her expression dry and skeptical. “Sure.”

 

Uzi opened her mouth to fire something else back, but V cut her off with a sigh, shaking her head. “What makes it even worse,” she muttered, “is that N talks about you constantly. You’ve gotta get him to stop.”

 

Uzi froze. Her chest gave a small, startled jolt. “Wait—what?”

 

She stared at V, disbelieving, her voice sharp with disbelief. “He talks about me?

 

V gave her a tired look and nodded once, like she was already regretting bringing it up. “All the time. He used to do it before, but it’s gotten worse. Like, way worse. Today especially.”

 

Uzi didn’t respond at first—her thoughts were spinning too fast. Her heart thudded heavily in her chest, and she wasn’t even sure what emotion she was feeling. Confusion? Embarrassment? Guilt? Hope?

 

What did V mean by he was talking about her a lot?

 

And what exactly… was he saying?

 

Uzi’s voice caught slightly in her throat before she managed to speak. “W-What… what does he even say about me?”

 

V rolled her eyes and shrugged, pausing just a second to think. “It’s not anything bad,” she said with a wave of her hand, “just… annoying. If something reminds him of you, he’ll start going off. You’ll come up in literally the most random conversations. It’s like some switch flips in his processor.”

 

That made Uzi’s chest tighten, her fingers curling into the straps of her bag. Her mind was trying to keep up—he talked about her that much? Why?

 

She blinked hard, trying to process, then asked, more firmly this time, “Wait… you said he used to do that? But it’s worse now?”

 

V gave her a dry, pointed look, nodding. “Yeah. Before, it’d be like once in a while—like if your name came up, he’d smile like an idiot or whatever and maybe mention something you said. Now? It’s been non-stop today. Every five minutes he’s bringing you up.”

 

Uzi felt a wave of heat crawl up her neck again, and she shifted uncomfortably, her gaze dropping to the floor. She tried to make sense of it. Did he talk about her to other drones too? Hopefully not… but considering V was probably the only drone he felt totally comfortable around, it made sense that she’d be the one hearing it. And J being constantly near V? Just her luck. That probably explained how she started putting things together.

 

Uzi sighed sharply through her nose, her brow furrowing. She wasn’t even sure what emotion was crawling under her skin—panic, frustration, something in between.

 

Finally, she looked back up at V and asked, quieter now, “What… what do you think I should do?”

 

Her voice wasn’t accusatory or sarcastic. It was genuine, hesitant. Uzi rarely asked for advice, but she was at a loss—and as annoying as V could be, she did know N better than anyone else. Maybe she'd have an answer... one Uzi couldn't find on her own.

 

V offered a nonchalant shrug, her arms crossing lazily over her chest. “I don’t know—just talk to him or something.”

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard. “You want me to talk to N?” Her tone was sharp with disbelief.

 

V gave her a flat, unamused look. “That’s literally what I just said.”

 

Uzi opened her mouth to ask why she had to be the one to deal with this, but V was already plowing ahead.

 

“It has to be you,” V said, her voice clipped with impatience. “I don’t know how to say it in a way that would actually get through to him. I’ve tried. He’ll just smile and nod like he gets it, then keep doing the same thing five seconds later.”

 

Uzi’s brows drew together. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

 

“It means N’s kind of an idiot,” V replied bluntly, throwing her hands up slightly. “And when it comes to you, he’s even more of one. I don’t think he even realizes how obvious he’s being. But if you tell him to knock it off, he’ll probably listen.”

 

Uzi bristled at that. “He’s not an idiot—!

 

V laughed under her breath, a dry little huff of amusement as she leaned back against the lockers. “Aw. You’re even defending him now. That’s adorable.”

 

That did it.

 

What…—? Shut up—,” Uzi snapped, her glare sharp and her cheeks heating up despite herself.

 

V smirked for a second like she’d won something, but the look faded as quickly as it came. Her eyes flicked to the clock down the hall and her posture straightened.

 

“I gotta go,” she said, already stepping away. “Bell’s about to ring. But seriously, Uzi—talk to him. Because if you don’t…” Her tone lowered, more serious now, “you know what could happen.”

 

Without waiting for a reply, she turned and strode off down the hallway, her footsteps echoing faintly behind her.

 

Uzi stared after her, jaw clenched, frustration boiling beneath her skin. She turned back to her locker and slammed it shut with a harsh click just as the bell rang overhead.

 

“Ugh,” she groaned under her breath, shoving her hands into her pockets and breaking into a reluctant jog down the hall toward class. Her mind was racing—great. Now she had this to deal with, too.

Notes:

OH EM GEEE

N is so cute I love him sm

I js love the idea of anytime he has the chance he’ll gush abt Uzi in like, any given conversation 😭🤚

He needs to think before he speaks though sometimes tbh cuz it’s not always a good thing 💀

And Uzi now finding out abt this ofc she’s gonna hella overthink everything and stress. I would say I feel bad for her but she’s kind of doing that to herself 💔

OK ANYWAYS more importantly, there’s not gonna be a chapter posted tomorrow. I really need to catch up on some future writing stuff cuz I’m like super behind, but I’ll be good if I have js one day to focus on writing. Sorry abt the posting being on and off schedule, soon it should balance out completely and like always be on schedule for however long I have left of this- since I started not posting on Sundays it’s been helping, but ig I’ve js gotten behind. It’s not like I’m burnt out of anything though cuz like I literally am so inspired rn- idek how I got behind this time 😭🤚

It’s fine though im js rambling lol

So basically the next chapter will be posted Thursday- see yall then 🤩🫶

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 57: Waiting…

Notes:

Super short chapter, kinda like an intermission before a bunch of stuff happens 🤭

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The numbers and formulas scrawled across the whiteboard might as well have been in a different language. Uzi sat slumped in her seat, elbow on the desk, chin resting in her palm as she stared blankly at the worksheet in front of her. Her pencil hadn’t moved in five minutes, and whatever the teacher was rambling on about had long since faded into meaningless background noise.

 

Her mind was completely elsewhere—fixated, tangled, and spinning around one single problem: How was she supposed to talk to N?

 

V’s warning kept echoing in her head, like an annoying alarm she couldn’t turn off. Uzi knew she couldn’t just brush this off or pretend it wasn’t serious—especially not with J possibly sniffing around, looking for any excuse to act. But how was she supposed to go up to N and have that conversation? It wasn’t like she could casually bring it up like it was nothing.

 

And on top of that, she didn’t even have any more classes with him today.

 

She’d have to catch him after school. Somehow.

 

Her first thought was to just wait by his car, but the second it crossed her mind, she grimaced. That felt… weird. Creepy, even. Like she was lurking.

 

Her gaze drifted down to the corner of her desk, where her phone peeked out of her bag. Then a better idea sparked in her head—why not just text him?

 

It’d be easier. Quieter. Less pressure. She could just ask him to meet somewhere without making a scene or needing to hunt him down. Less risk. Less chance of someone overhearing.

 

Still… her stomach twisted with nerves. Even just messaging him about this made her anxious. But it was the only option that made any sense. And besides—better she bring it up than leave it for J to sniff out.

 

Uzi let out a quiet sigh and reached for her phone.

 

Uzi’s eyes flicked toward the front of the room, watching as the teacher sat engrossed in something on her computer, barely acknowledging the class. Good. With a quiet breath, Uzi slid her phone into her lap, shielding it behind the desk’s edge, and tapped in her password with careful, deliberate swipes of her thumb.

 

Her messaging app opened to a list of contacts, but her attention was locked on just one name—N. Her finger hovered over it for a moment, hesitating.

 

Was this really the best way to go about it?

 

A part of her itched to overthink it, to come up with some backup plan or excuse to push this off until tomorrow. But she didn’t have time for that. She didn’t have any more classes with him. She had one chance, and she had to take it.

 

She tapped his contact and began typing.

 

Uzi [2:15 PM]: hey can u meet me in the library after school?

 

It was simple. Straight to the point. No explanation, no extra fluff. The library felt like the safest option—out of the way, quiet, and definitely not somewhere J would think to check. No one went there unless they absolutely had to.

 

Uzi stared at the screen after sending it, tapping her thumb anxiously against the phone’s edge and scrolling through nothing just to give her hands something to do. Her heart thudded quietly in her chest—faster than it should’ve been. She hated this.

 

Then, after what felt like hours rather than seconds, N replied.

 

N ^- ˕ -^ [2:15 PM]: Okay!

 

That was it. No follow-up question. No demand for why. No hesitation.

 

Uzi blinked at the message. She shouldn’t have been surprised. N was always like that—agreeable, cooperative, and strangely patient. It didn’t matter what she asked of him; he never pushed for more than she gave. And even if she didn’t want to admit it, that part of him… made her chest feel weird. Tight. Warm, somehow.

 

She shook the thought from her head, forcing her expression into something neutral. No time to spiral. She shut her phone off and slipped it back into her bag, staring blankly at her worksheet. Her pencil still hadn’t moved.

 

Now, all she had to do was wait.

Notes:

Omg so yesterday I got my nails done and typing literally anything is actually killing me 💔

And what makes it worse is that when I transfer what I wrote from my notes app to here, anything I have in bold or italics doesn’t transfer, so I js put a * around whatever the word is so I remember to edit it, right? But then I gotta delete the * things and select the word ughh to italicize them ughh 😩
And the my nails are like, kinda long almond/stiletto shaped, so there’s js a whole lot of little tapping on my phone every time I type LMAO
Sorry abt complaining I js had to tell someone abt my struggle - idgaf though fan fiction is more important 💔

ANYWAYS MUCH MORE IMPORTANTLY I HAVE A FEW ANNOUNCEMENTS

I’m gonna post a chapter tomorrow right, but no chapter Saturday 🥲 and I already don’t post Sundays, so the chapter after the one tomorrow will be posted Monday

Ok that was the announcement lol

Super busy Saturday cuz I have prom and I wake up super late (cuz no way am I getting up early on a weekend 💀) so I’ll literally have no time to post 💔

Sorry abt that LMAO 😭🤚

Maybe next week I’ll have enough written in advance that I could post two chapters one day. I really hope so - I’m so inspired rn cuz I have so many ideas on what’s gonna happen next in this fic, so I’m gonna try my best to lock in on writing 😖

That’s pretty much all I had to say - I’ll see yall tomorrow in the next chapter 🫶

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 58: Panic

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi moved quietly down the hallway, her footsteps echoing faintly off the tile floors as the building emptied around her. Lockers clanged in the distance. Doors slammed shut. The usual chaos of dismissal was already thinning out. Still, her nerves felt anything but calm.

 

She was headed for the library—but this time, it wasn’t to stay to investigate a murder, or to dig up secrets. No adrenaline rush of mystery this time. Just… a conversation. One she wasn’t sure how to even begin.

 

Each step toward the library door made her chest feel tighter, like her internal wiring was wound up too tight. Her mind kept trying to convince itself this wasn’t a big deal, that she was just telling N to maybe keep his mouth shut a little more—but her heart clearly hadn’t gotten the message.

 

Because it was a big deal. Not just because of J, or the constant risk of slipping up and getting herself terminated—but because it was him. N. Just the thought of being near him again, of having his full attention, made her feel like her system was overheating. And that was… annoying. And confusing. And maybe kind of nice. Which only made it worse.

 

She kept walking, trying not to let her expression betray how much her thoughts were spiraling.

 

There was no turning back now.

 

Uzi finally made it to the doors right outside the library. She hesitated for a moment, before willing herself to open them. As she did, the quiet hush of the library greeted Uzi the moment she stepped inside, the familiar cold of the room brushing against her like a warning—or a welcome, she couldn’t really tell. She shivered lightly, instinctively pulling her jacket tighter around her frame as the door eased shut behind her with a low creak.

 

Her eyes swept the space, half-expecting to find the room completely empty. Part of her hoped N wasn’t here yet, just to give her a moment longer to breathe, to gather her thoughts before everything spilled out of her too fast, too raw. But the other part of her—some annoyingly eager, fluttering piece buried in her chest—hoped he was already here, waiting.

 

And he was.

 

Her gaze landed on him near the back, leaned casually against a tall bookshelf, hands shoved deep into his coat pockets. He wasn’t pacing or restless, just… standing there. Relaxed. Eyes wandering lazily across the library, like he was just passing time. But there was a quiet kind of focus in him, too—like he was aware of every sound, every footstep, waiting for the exact one he was hoping to hear.

 

Waiting for her.

 

Uzi's breath caught in her throat, and the knot in her stomach only tightened. Seeing him like that—so calm, so there—was like getting punched and hugged at the same time. And she hated that feeling. Or maybe she didn’t. Whatever it was, it sent her thoughts spiraling again, this time faster.

 

What was she even supposed to say to him? ’Hey, maybe tone it down with all the emotional vulnerability before my insides implode and J turns me into scrap metal—‘ Yeah, great opener.

 

Still, she didn’t stop walking. Her legs moved forward like they had a mind of their own, even as her nerves screamed at her to stall, to retreat, to do anything else. But it was too late for that now.

 

She was here. And so was he.

 

Uzi came to a slow stop in front of him, her arms stiff at her sides. N offered another soft smile as she approached, tilting his head just slightly.

 

“Hey,” he greeted, voice as light and easy as ever, like this was just another ordinary moment between them… because it was.

 

…Right?

 

Uzi blinked, heart skipping without permission. “Hey,” she echoed, trying her best to sound just as casual, even though she was anything but.

 

There was a small beat of silence. Not awkward, just… quiet. Then N nodded toward the rest of the library and asked, “Wanna go sit somewhere?”

 

He didn’t sound suspicious. Not curious. Just calm. Waiting. And for some reason, that only made Uzi’s thoughts more chaotic. She gave a short nod, doing her best not to let it show on her face.

 

“Yeah,” she said. “There’s a table over there. That work?”

 

“Sounds good,” N replied, without hesitation.

 

The two of them turned and began walking slowly in the direction of the table. The quiet between them was almost unnerving—not because it was tense, but because it wasn’t. N was calm. Content. Like he was just happy to be there, walking beside her. And that… that made everything so much harder.

 

Uzi stared ahead, eyes fixed on the table they were approaching, but her thoughts were spinning. She had to figure out how to say this. The whole reason she’d asked him here was simple enough—tell him to stop talking about her when J was around. V had made it sound urgent, like J was already starting to put the pieces together, and if she did—Uzi didn’t even want to think about that outcome.

 

And yet, despite the simplicity of the task, her chest still felt tight. Because no matter how she tried to phrase it in her head, it all sounded too blunt. Too awkward. Too revealing. She hadn't even fully processed the fact that N had been talking about her so much. And not in some negative, gossipy way—he’d been saying nice things. Constantly, apparently. The thought sent a strange heat crawling up her spine, pooling somewhere behind her ribs where she couldn’t quite reach.

 

She didn’t feel annoyed. Or creeped out. Or uncomfortable. She just didn’t know how to feel. Or rather, she did—she just didn’t want to name it yet. Didn’t want to look too closely at whatever this was between them.

 

So she kept walking beside him, trying to steel herself for the conversation to come… and desperately trying to keep her own expression from betraying the absolute storm behind her eyes.

 

Just as they reached the table and were about to sit, Uzi felt her pulse thrum in her ears. The anticipation of the conversation alone had her stomach in knots, her fingers twitching slightly at her sides. But then—click.

 

A sharp sound cut through the stillness of the library. The door.

 

Uzi’s gaze snapped instinctively toward the source—just a glance, just a habit. Normally, she would’ve looked away without a second thought—normally, it would just be some random drone she couldn’t care less about. But the second her eyes landed on the figure who entered, her whole body went still. Every wire in her brain seemed to short out in the span of a breath.

 

It was J.

 

She strode in without urgency, a book tucked under one arm, not even glancing around. She didn’t look angry. Or suspicious. She just… walked. Calm. Casual. Like this was normal. Like she had every reason to be there.

 

But Uzi’s heart stopped cold.

 

Why is she here? That wasn’t a coincidence. There was no way. Of all places she could go—why the library? Now?

 

She didn’t know whether to run or hide or pretend like nothing was wrong. Every instinct screamed that this was bad. That she couldn’t be seen sitting here with him.

 

A flicker of movement made Uzi realize N had turned toward her. His brows were drawn together slightly, confused by the sudden stiffness in her posture.

 

Uzi leaned in, barely restraining the wild edge in her voice. “J’s here,” she whispered, the words rushing out, sharp and panicked.

 

N blinked. “Wait—what?”

 

She didn’t answer—she didn’t have to. N’s eyes followed her line of sight. The moment he spotted J, his expression shifted. His usual calm faltered into something far more serious, and she could see the realization hit him like it had hit her.

 

Uzi’s mind raced. She hadn’t thought this far ahead. What was she supposed to do now? Sit there and pretend like nothing was happening? Risk J seeing them together and assuming the worst? Would she even bother assuming—would she just act?

 

Every possible scenario spun violently through her head, and none of them ended well. Her chest tightened, and her throat felt dry. All she could think was—

 

This cannot be happening right now.

 

Uzi didn’t wait. Her thoughts barely had time to form before her body was already moving.

 

Screw it.

 

Without warning, she seized N’s hand—gripping it harder than she meant to—and turned on her heel, pulling him behind her. No plan, no strategy. Just instinct.

 

The shelves.

 

A maze of towering rows, packed so tightly together with forgotten books and dust-coated corners that you could vanish in them if you knew where to go. And she did. Or at least, she hoped she did. All she knew was she needed to be anywhere but out in the open right now.

 

Her steps were fast, light—quick enough to flee, but careful not to draw attention. The muffled clatter of their shoes barely echoed against the carpeted floor. Her grip didn’t loosen even when she heard N stumble behind her, startled by the sudden burst of movement. She spared a glance back—his face said everything. Shock. Confusion. A bit of alarm. But he didn’t fight her. He let her pull him. He followed, no questions asked.

 

He trusts me, the thought flickered through her mind, and she wasn’t sure if it made her feel guilty or something… else.

 

By the time they finally slipped around the last corner, hidden deep between the shelves where the fluorescent lights barely reached, Uzi released his hand. She stood there for a second, chest heaving, heart pounding, as she struggled to catch her breath. Not from the sprint—well, maybe partly—but mostly from the panic still lodged in her ribs.

 

She didn’t say anything right away. Neither did N.

 

Uzi stared at the rows of dusty spines ahead of her, trying to calm the rapid-fire thoughts crashing into each other in her head. Her hand still tingled from where she’d grabbed his. Too tightly, probably. But he hadn’t let go. He hadn’t even hesitated.

 

And now here they were, hidden in the shadows of a place she didn’t even want to be in to begin with.

 

Why the hell did she come up with this idea?

 

Uzi inhaled slowly through her nose, the tight feeling in her chest finally starting to ease as her pulse steadied. She turned to N, her eyes shifting to meet his, though she only held his gaze for a split second before looking away again.

 

“Sorry,” she muttered, voice quiet but laced with a rawness she couldn’t quite hide. “I just… I panicked.”

 

There wasn’t much else she could say. Her face was already burning, though she couldn’t tell if it was from the adrenaline still pumping in her system or the sheer embarrassment of dragging him across the library like some kind of lunatic. Probably both. She resisted the urge to fidget, crossing her arms loosely instead, hoping it made her look more composed than she felt.

 

N blinked at her once, his expression unreadable for a moment—then he gave a light smile, the same soft, understanding one that always somehow made her feel more exposed than comforted.

 

“It’s okay,” he said, his tone gentle and easy. “Honestly, that was pretty smart. Coming back here, I mean.”

 

Uzi gave a stiff nod, the words catching in her throat for a second before she forced out a mumbled, “Thanks, I guess.”

 

What was she supposed to say to that? Thanks for not thinking I’m insane? Thanks for following me without question? She wasn’t sure.

 

A small silence settled between them, not quite awkward, but heavy. Then Uzi spoke up again, her voice quieter this time.

 

“We should probably… keep walking,” she said, glancing toward the twisting rows of shelves ahead. “Just in case.”

 

N nodded once, still no hesitation, and they started walking together—quiet footsteps on the carpet, the occasional creak of an old floorboard beneath them.

 

They walked in silence for a few moments, the only sounds around them being the muffled hum of the lights overhead and the distant clack of the library doors closing again. It was a weird kind of quiet—peaceful, but charged. Or maybe that was just in Uzi’s head. Her thoughts were tangled enough to make everything feel louder than it was.

 

Then, N broke the silence, his voice gentle and without pressure.

 

“Do you… want to talk about it now? Whatever it was you wanted to say?”

 

Uzi’s steps faltered slightly. She didn’t answer right away—her mind was still too scattered. The words weren’t formed yet, not fully. And with everything that had just happened, she needed a second to breathe.

 

“Not yet,” she said finally. “Let’s find a place to sit first.”

 

N didn’t ask why. He just nodded, like always—calm, patient, and way too understanding for her liking.

 

Uzi kept walking, trying to push away the nerves creeping back into her chest, trying to remind herself why they were here.

 

Just tell him to stop talking about you in front of J. That’s it. That’s all.

 

So why was it already starting to feel so much more complicated than that?

 

After a few quiet turns through the rows of bookshelves, they reached the end of the aisle—a quiet, dim-lit corner of the library that was far enough from the main space to be comfortably private. The shelves towered around them like walls, muffling the sounds beyond. Uzi glanced around and gave a small shrug, pretending to be nonchalant despite the tight knot of nerves in her chest.

 

“This seems like a good spot,” she said, carefully keeping her voice steady. She hoped it didn’t come off too strained, but every word felt like it teetered on the edge of something she didn’t want to acknowledge. She avoided looking directly at N as she spoke, afraid her eyes might give her away.

 

N didn’t question it—he just nodded and quietly lowered himself to the floor beside her. Uzi followed, settling with her back against the bookshelf, her knees pulled up loosely, arms resting over them. The carpeted floor was cool beneath her legs, the faint scent of old pages clinging to the air.

 

She stole a glance at him.

 

N was watching her—not in a demanding way, but with the kind of quiet focus that made her skin prickle. He was clearly ready to listen, just like always. That only made things harder. The weight of his attention somehow made her feel more vulnerable, like every word she said might carry more meaning than she intended.

 

Uzi took a breath, trying to quiet the frantic buzzing in her head.

 

“V asked me to talk to you,” she said slowly, the words coming out halting, like she had to drag them up from her throat. She didn’t dare look at him now, eyes fixed somewhere on the floor ahead of her.

 

N tilted his head a little, still listening.

 

Uzi continued, her voice soft. “It’s about J…”

 

She trailed off. Her heart thudded painfully once in her chest.

 

N blinked once and said simply, “Yeah?”

 

His tone was still calm, but she could see the subtle shift in his face—he was intrigued now, maybe even a little concerned, though he hid it well. She could always tell, though. The slight crease in his brow gave him away.

 

Uzi swallowed hard, then forced herself to finish. “V thinks… J might be catching on.”

Notes:

Initially when I was writing this chapter, I was gonna make it a cliff hanger when J walked in, but I decided that it’d make the chapter too short and I don’t see why I shouldn’t add the rest that I included 💀

It would have made the next chapter longer than it already is anyways so it works out ig

OK SO I mentioned in the last chapter that I’m not posting Saturday (and Sunday) so the next chapter will be posted on Monday 🥲 but like that’ll be awesome cuz I absolutely love the next chapter (ik I keep saying that abt like all the chapters but this one is really good… I think 😭)

Spoilers but not, but the next chapter is like, literally the definition of hurt/comfort. Oh yeah— be prepared 💔

And it’s super long too and lots of dialogue which is great

That’s all I’ll say abt it though. I didn’t wanna leave yall with no inkling abt what’s gonna happen for 2 days 💔

Abt this chapter; I thought it was pretty funny that J js coincidentally went to the library at that exact time. I’ll confirm it now though, but she genuinely wasn’t going cuz she thought Uzi was gonna be there or som. I feel like she’d be the type to study a lot cuz she’s so like,,, idk, ‘strict’ with herself any stuff, if that makes sense. So she goes to the library all the time to check out and return books she’s reading and stuff. Going at the end of the day is more convenient for her too cuz during the day, she doesn’t wanna let herself get distracted with anything other than schoolwork. She js seems really smart, but she’s really fucking cocky abt it and it’s annoying. Like, anytime she sees someone else as being a little less smart than her, or maybe even more so, she’ll make it a point to belittle them, but like in a subconscious way. Like, she won’t directly say something, but she’ll js fuck with ur mind. Like, remember when Uzi met J, and J said something like “oh N never talks abt u” or som like that. Well, obviously now we know that he did mention her probably more than once, but J purposely said this cuz she was kinda testing Uzi. And Uzi obviously felt really self conscious abt it afterwards too cuz she was like “has he really never mentioned me?”

J pisses me off sm omfg 😫
But I have to give her credit cuz like, she’s smart ig. But she’s so smart abt things it’s annoying.
Oh and I also imagine her as the kind of person to suck up to adults and want to be the teacher’s favorite in every class. Like, she’d be the one the teacher picks to pass out papers in class, or grab something from the printer literally every time.

Ok enough yapping. I’ll see ya’ll on Monday, have a great weekend ;3

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 59: Bite

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

That finally earned a full reaction from N. His expression turned more serious, his eyes flickering briefly with concern.

 

“Catching on?” he echoed, brows now knitting together. “How?”

 

Uzi clenched her hands together in her lap and shifted uncomfortably. She wasn’t used to this kind of talk—not when it actually mattered.

 

“That’s… what I needed to talk to you about,” she murmured, still trying to summon the rest of the words. Her nerves were crawling under her skin now, the pressure of the moment closing in tighter.

 

Just say it, she told herself. Get it over with.

 

But even as she tried to brace herself, she couldn’t help but feel like this was the beginning of something far bigger than just a simple warning.

 

Uzi’s voice faltered as she began, the words sticking to her throat like tar. “So… basically…” she started, eyes flicking down to her lap before lifting again to meet his. But once they did—once she locked eyes with him—it was like her entire brain short-circuited.

 

Why did he have to look at her like that? With such quiet focus, such undivided attention. It wasn’t intense or overbearing—no, that would’ve been easier to deal with. It was gentle, patient, like he genuinely wanted to understand. Like he cared.

 

And it was killing her.

 

She couldn't take it anymore. Whatever hesitation had been keeping her mouth shut crumbled under the pressure, and the words tumbled out, fast and breathless, like she just needed to get them away from her.

 

“V told me you’ve been talking about me to J—and that J’s starting to get suspicious. Like, really suspicious. Because apparently this isn’t new? Like, you do this a lot? Talk about me a lot? And now she’s kinda starting to catch on that something’s off—” She cut herself off with an awkward, almost panicked laugh and looked away, face burning. She didn’t even want to see his expression.

 

From the corner of her vision, she saw N blink. Then blink again. His posture hadn’t shifted much, but his expression was definitely different—slightly wide-eyed, brows drawing together in that open, almost lost way he got when he was trying to understand something that didn’t immediately click.

 

After a few seconds of stunned silence, he tilted his head slightly and asked, uncertainly, “Wait… could you say that again? I didn’t really get what you meant.”

 

Uzi wanted to sink into the floor and disappear. Right there. Just vanish between the carpet fibers and never be seen again.

 

She exhaled hard through her nose, resisting the urge to smack her own forehead. Her voice was flatter this time, slower, but the irritation at herself bled through. “You need to stop mentioning me when you’re around J. She’s getting suspicious. Like, she might be catching on that I know something.”

 

N just stared at her for a moment, his mouth slightly parted. Then, as if her words finally clicked into place, his gaze unfocused briefly before a deep, visible realization washed over him.

 

“…Mentioning you…?” he muttered, almost to himself, brows slowly lifting.

 

And then it happened.

 

Color flushed into his face, the faint glow in his cheeks betraying everything he didn’t say aloud. His eyes widened just a fraction, and he immediately looked away, lifting a hand to his mouth in quiet, flustered horror. His fingers curled over his lips like he was trying to hide behind them, and he muttered something that was too quiet for her to hear.

 

Uzi watched all of it happen like someone watching a crash in slow motion. Her brain couldn’t keep up with what she was seeing—what it meant.

 

Was he… embarrassed?

 

Robo-god, he was.

 

That weird fluttery feeling in her stomach—the one she’d been trying to ignore for the past fifteen minutes—only got worse.

 

Great, she thought dryly. Just fantastic.

 

N let out a breath that sounded more like a broken hiccup than anything else, still visibly flustered. His hand dropped from his mouth, and he looked at her, eyes soft and uncertain. “I… I didn’t even realize I was doing it,” he admitted, his voice low, filled with an odd mixture of surprise and guilt. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”

 

His words lingered in the space between them, folding into a quiet that felt heavier than it should have been. The air was still, not awkward, exactly—just weighted. Uzi didn’t say anything at first. She sat there, watching her hands in her lap, trying to sort through the mess of emotion bubbling just beneath her skin.

 

Finally, she sighed, almost too softly to hear. “It’s fine,” she said, even though she wasn’t sure if she really meant it.

 

N turned slightly, just enough to face her more directly. “Really?” he asked, voice barely audible, as if the idea that she might not be angry was too fragile to speak aloud.

 

Uzi gave a slow, shallow nod. “Yeah.” She didn’t have the energy to be angry. Not right now. Not when everything felt so close to unraveling.

 

But even if she wasn’t mad, that didn’t mean this wasn’t serious.

 

She glanced sideways, away from him. “You just… need to think more, okay?” she said, quieter now. “You know what J would do if…” Her words trailed off, the weight of them thick in her throat.

 

She didn’t finish the sentence at that point, but it didn’t need to be finished.

 

The moment stretched thin. She could feel him watching her from the corner of her eye, his stare careful—concerned.

 

But Uzi wasn’t focused on that anymore. Not on him. Not even on her own flushed cheeks or the way her chest felt tight in a way she couldn’t explain.

 

All she could think about was how real the danger was.

 

If J found out she knew—really knew—about what they were, what they’d done, what they were still doing… Uzi wouldn’t get a second chance. J didn’t do warnings. She didn’t do mercy. And if she suspected Uzi was a liability, she’d be dead. Just like that.

 

That thought alone sent a cold tremor crawling down her spine. Uzi tightened her arms over her chest, suddenly feeling smaller than she had all day. Her voice was quiet when she finally spoke again, almost to herself.

 

“She’d kill me. And we both know it.”

 

Another long silence settled between them, heavy and still—like the entire world was holding its breath. Uzi had just begun to drift again, thoughts threatening to spiral into darker corners of her mind, when she felt something unexpected.

 

A soft, warm pressure wrapped around her hand.

 

Her eyes lifted, startled out of her haze, and landed on N.

 

He wasn’t looking away this time. Both of his hands gently cradled one of hers, his thumbs brushing faint, soothing strokes over her fingers. The gesture was cautious but deliberate—so tender it caught her completely off guard. Goosebumps crawled up her arms, but she ignored them. Her eyes searched his face, waiting for an explanation, for anything. 

 

And then N spoke, voice quiet but firm, like it had been pulled from the deepest part of him.

 

“I’m not going to let that happen,” he said. “I already promised you, remember? I meant it then—and I still do now.”

 

He hesitated, his grip tightening just slightly, grounding her. His expression was steady—serious, for once, without his usual dorky undertones.

 

“I’ll protect you,” he said, with more conviction this time. “No matter what. I won’t let her touch you. Not even come close.”

 

Uzi blinked, stunned into silence. Her throat was dry. She wanted to say something—anything—but the words just didn’t come. Her heart was pounding against her ribs, and her stomach was doing this annoying flip-flop that made it hard to think straight.

 

She frowned slightly—not from hurt, but confusion. A kind of quiet disbelief that pulled at the corners of her mouth.

 

Why?

 

Why was she worth all this?

 

She appreciated N. Robo-god, she really did. He was risking so much for her—again and again. And it wasn’t that she didn’t want his protection. It was that she didn’t understand it.

 

She wasn’t anything special. Not in the way that should’ve drawn someone like him  in.

 

Her life had been a mess long before he ever showed up. She came with more baggage than she could even carry, and she knew it. She could be snappy, cold, brutally honest when she felt like it. She never cared what anyone thought about her, and maybe that made her strong—but it sure as hell didn’t make her easy to be around.

 

So why her?

 

Why did N—soft, sweet, hopelessly oblivious N—care so much about a drone like her?

 

He deserved better. Kinder. More whole.

 

She looked down at her hand again. His grip was still there, solid and unwavering.

 

She didn’t pull away. But part of her wanted to cry. And she didn’t even know why.

 

Uzi broke.

 

The words pushed their way up from somewhere deep—somewhere she’d kept locked and buried and sealed shut because she had to. Because if she didn’t, she’d drown in it.

 

But this time, she couldn’t hold it back.

 

“…Why?” Her voice cracked—barely more than a whisper, rough and frayed at the edges like a wire stripped bare. “Why do you care so much?”

 

She finally looked at N, really looked at him. There was no wall left behind her eyes now—only raw, unfiltered confusion and pain.

 

“I don’t get it,” she said, the words tumbling out faster, shakier. “What makes me so… so worth it? Why would someone like you—” her voice caught again, “—waste your time on someone like me?

 

She hated how her voice shook, hated that she was falling apart in front of him, but it was too late to take it back. She blinked hard, fast, trying to shove down the burn behind her eyes before it could rise. No tears. Not now.

 

“You don’t deserve this,” she added. “You don’t deserve me.”

 

Her fingers twitched. Her hand began to slip from his—not yanked away, just pulling back like a ghost retreating into the dark. Part of her wanted to disappear completely, crawl back into the hole she always felt she came from. He was too close. Too kind. Too good. And she didn’t belong in the same orbit as him.

 

Why was he still here?

 

She didn’t get it.

 

She couldn’t get it.

 

Because Uzi knew what she was. She carried the weight of her past issues like chains around her frame—everything she’d seen, everything she’d done, everything she was. She wasn’t always like this—it really only started after her mother died… She started acting out, but also becoming more reclusive. She just had so much emotional baggage—no matter how much she tried to ignore it, it always sat just beneath the surface. Then there was that nagging thought that stuck to the back of her skull like gum, whispering that no one who got close to her ever stayed. Why would they? Everyone always leaves in the end, no matter what.

 

And it was either they left… or she pushed them away first.

 

That was safer.

 

That was better.

 

Because how could anyone stay if they really knew her? The real her—the one full of jagged pieces and bitterness and hurt so deep she’d forgotten what it felt like not to carry it?

 

Even now, with friends—drones who’d stuck around longer than she ever expected—she still didn’t believe it would last.

 

Not when they figured her out.

 

Not when they saw everything.

 

She wasn’t the kind of drone others chose.

 

And yet… here N was.

 

Still holding on.

 

And she couldn’t understand why.

 

Uzi began to pull away completely now, curling back into herself as she turned her face away from him. Her jaw clenched, her throat tightening with that familiar ache—the kind that came before the tears. She didn’t want him to see her like this, vulnerable and cracked open. She didn’t want anyone to.

 

But she didn’t get far.

 

Because then—so gently, so carefully—she felt a hand against her face. Not forced. Not demanding. Just… there. A soft, reverent touch cradling her jaw like she might shatter if he wasn’t careful. And somehow, that made it worse.

 

It made her want to cry.

 

Slowly, hesitantly, she turned her face back to him, led by the weight of his hand rather than the will to look. And when her gaze met his—when she saw the way he was looking at her, like she was something precious—her heart twisted in a way she couldn’t name.

 

N was staring at her, steady and unflinching. There was no pity in his eyes. No confusion. Just this quiet, fierce certainty, like what he was about to say wasn’t up for debate.

 

“Don’t talk about yourself like that,” he said, voice soft but firm. “You don’t get to decide you’re not worth something just because you feel that way.”

 

Uzi’s frown deepened, trembling at the corners. She didn’t try to stop the tear that slipped down her cheek this time—what was the point? The moment it fell, N reached up with his thumb, brushing it away with a tenderness that made her chest ache.

 

Her voice broke again, quieter now. “…But why do you care?

 

Those were the only words she could find. Everything else felt too heavy, too messy, too raw.

 

Why care about her?

 

Why would someone so good—so gentle, so kind—waste any of that on her?

 

N’s expression softened even more, if that was possible. His thumb lingered just briefly against her skin, then fell away as he spoke again.

 

“Because I like you, Uzi,” he said, with no hesitation. “I really do.”

 

Uzi blinked at him, something catching in her chest—like she couldn’t breathe for a second.

 

“And even if I didn’t,” he added, his voice low, but still so steady, “you’re still my friend. That matters. You matter. Even when you don’t think so.”

 

He paused, eyes searching hers. “Everyone’s life has value, Uzi. Even when they don’t see it themselves. And you… you have so much value.”

 

Uzi didn’t know what to say. She couldn’t. Her mouth opened, then closed again, and all she could do was feel—the weight of his words crashing over her, unfamiliar and terrifying and warm all at once.

 

No one had ever said anything like that to her before.

 

And deep down, some small, trembling part of her wanted to believe him.

 

For a long, breathless moment, Uzi just stared at him—eyes wide, chest heaving like the weight of what he’d said had left her winded. She didn’t know how to respond. No clever remark, no sarcastic quip, no bitter retort bubbled to the surface. Her mind was quiet, for once. All she could hear was the echo of his voice, and feel the lingering warmth of his touch still burning against her skin.

 

No one had ever said something like that to her. No one had ever seen her like that—like she mattered. Like she wasn’t broken, or a burden, or a ticking time bomb waiting to implode. And he meant it. She knew he meant it.

 

She whispered his name, breath catching in her throat. “N…”

 

That was all she could manage. Just a single syllable, small and fragile and full of something unspoken. And before she could talk herself out of it—before the fear could twist her back into silence—she leaned in, closing the space between them.

 

Her lips met his.

 

It was soft. Uncertain. But the second they touched, something inside her cracked open—like a floodgate she didn’t even realize she’d been holding shut. N didn’t pull away. In fact, he leaned in just slightly, tilting his head, one of his hands curling around the side of her jaw as if she were something precious and breakable. His thumb grazed her cheek in a slow, reverent motion, and he kissed her back with the same gentleness he’d spoken to her with—tender and warm and real.

 

They stayed like that for a few long moments, suspended in a silence that felt almost sacred. No noise but the faint hum of the library’s lights, and each tender exchange that was them kissing.

 

And then, Uzi pulled back.

 

She didn’t go far, just enough to breathe. Her eyes were glossy, and she blinked once, slow and dazed, as if trying to ground herself in reality again.

 

“I…” Her voice trembled. “No one’s ever… said that to me before.”

 

The words cracked at the edges. Raw. Honest. Too vulnerable, but she didn’t care. Not right now. Not when he was looking at her like that—like it meant something that she was still here.

 

N didn’t say anything at first. His gaze softened, growing distant for a second, his brows pinched in a quiet ache. She could see it—how much he wished that hadn’t been true for her.

 

Then, gently, he said, “I’m glad I got to be the first.”

 

That was all. Simple. But it hit her harder than any long-winded speech ever could have.

 

And without thinking, Uzi leaned forward again—this time not to kiss him, but to wrap her arms tightly around him, clinging like he was the only solid thing in a world that constantly felt like it was falling apart. N froze for just a heartbeat, startled, but then his arms came up around her just as fast. He pulled her in, firm but careful, one hand splayed against her back, the other resting lightly against the back of her head.

 

She buried the side of her face into his shirt, right below his shoulder—his warmth, his scent, his presence grounding her. She let herself cry, just a little. Quiet tears that slid down her cheek and soaked into the fabric. And he held her like he wasn’t going to let go. Like he meant every word he’d said. Like she meant something.

 

And for the first time in a long time… Uzi believed it might be true.

 

Uzi remained tucked against him for what felt like both an eternity and a fleeting moment. Part of her never wanted to let go—this was the safest she’d felt in forever. But she knew she had to. Reality would come knocking eventually. With a reluctant breath, she slowly unwrapped her arms from around N, feeling the chill of absence the second his warmth began to fade.

 

N let go too, but not completely. As she pulled away, one of his hands slipped down and found hers, fingers intertwining without a second thought. It wasn’t possessive. Just… grounding. A silent reassurance that he was still there.

 

Uzi sniffled quietly, trying to discreetly wipe the last of her tears with the back of her free hand. “Thanks,” she muttered, her voice rough from the emotion she hadn’t quite finished processing.

 

Surprisingly, she didn’t hate herself for being this open. Normally, she would’ve cringed at how exposed she was—how soft. But right now? She just felt calm. Like she didn’t need to keep every wall up all the time.

 

She gave his hand a firmer squeeze. “We should probably go,” she added, a little steadier this time.

 

N nodded, not saying anything, just smiling faintly. The quiet kind. The genuine kind.

 

They rose to their feet together, still hand-in-hand. Neither of them let go, not even for a second. It was like their bodies had decided before their minds could—don’t break this connection yet.

 

They began to walk, slow steps through the narrow corridor of shelves, the hush of the library wrapping around them like a blanket. A few paces in, Uzi glanced at him, her earlier determination returning. She took a deep breath, her posture stiffening slightly with resolve.

 

“Hey,” she said, firm this time, not shaky. “Just… so we’re clear—you’re not gonna talk about me around J anymore, right? Not even a little.”

 

N looked at her, meeting her eyes with something between seriousness and regret. “Yeah,” he said without hesitation. “I get it now. I’ll be careful. It won’t happen again.”

 

His expression was sincere—no trace of defensiveness, just quiet understanding. Maybe even guilt. He knew what was at stake now, and she didn’t need to say it again.

 

Uzi gave a small nod, satisfied—though her chest still ached with that familiar tension. She didn’t like being afraid of J, or what could happen. But at least now… she wasn’t facing that fear alone.

 

They walked in silence, the soft hum of the library's lights and the distant creak of floorboards the only ambient sound around them. Yet inside Uzi’s head, it was anything but quiet.

 

Her fingers were still wrapped tightly around N’s—she hadn’t let go, and she didn’t want to. But at the same time, her hand was starting to feel clammy, the sensation nagging at her. Not because she was uncomfortable with him—Robo-god, no—but because the longer the silence stretched, the heavier it felt. Like something unspoken was sitting between them, refusing to budge. And that weight was starting to settle in her chest.

 

She snuck a glance at him, pretending to look at something else. He looked so calm, at ease—though she swore, swore, she saw his gaze dart to her for a second too long. Like maybe he was thinking the same thing she was. Or maybe she was just imagining that. She hoped she wasn’t.

 

Still, the air between them felt dense. Not awkward, exactly—just… expectant. And she hated it. Hated not knowing what to say, what to do, how to breathe when it felt like something inside her was about to burst.

 

Then, like a bolt of lightning, a thought hit her: what if she just hugged him again?

 

A real hug, this time. No rushing, no hiding. Just… standing there, arms around him. Holding on, because maybe she could. Because they weren’t about to be interrupted, and because… maybe he wouldn’t mind. Maybe he wanted her to.

 

But then she felt the immediate sting of doubt. Was that weird? Too much? How would she even ask something like that? She couldn’t just blurt it out—‘hey, wanna hug again?’ That was awkward as hell. She could barely get the word thanks out earlier without choking on emotion.

 

Still, her mind circled back to it again and again, no matter how many other options she tried to come up with. Nothing else felt right. Nothing else felt like it would actually help.

 

She pressed her lips together, scolding herself silently. This was dumb. Childish, even. But no matter how much she tried to dismiss it… the idea clung to her like static, stubborn and persistent.

 

And somehow, she already knew she was going to give in to it.

 

Uzi teetered on the edge of uncertainty, the weight of her thoughts almost loud enough to drown out the world around her. She argued with herself for a moment longer—quiet, internal panic clawing at her resolve. But before she could spiral again, her body had already made the choice for her. Her steps had faltered. She’d stopped walking. And, naturally, N had stopped with her.

 

He tilted his head slightly, looking at her with gentle confusion. His hand was still laced with hers, but now he gave her a soft nudge with his shoulder, like he was trying to shake her loose from whatever trance she’d fallen into. “You alright?” he asked, his voice soft, laced with concern—like he didn’t want to startle her, but he was worried.

 

That alone made her panic spike.

 

Her eyes darted away. “No— I mean, yeah, I’m fine. It’s just…” She barely noticed her hand beginning to slip from his, her fingers loosening with nerves. She hated how quickly the heat rose in her cheeks. She could already feel the crimson blooming under her metal plates, prickling and hot. This was such a bad idea. Abort mission, abort—

 

He leaned in slightly, brows pinched with a mixture of worry and curiosity. “Uzi?—” he began.

 

But she cut him off.

 

“Iwasjustwonderingifi…couldhugyouagain,” she blurted.

 

It came out as one frantic breath, the syllables smashed together into one clumsy, runaway sentence. And the moment it left her mouth, she froze. Wide-eyed. Horrified. She’d cut him off. She’d cut him off just to say that? What the hell was wrong with her?!

 

He was going to think she was weird. He was going to think she was too much. Too clingy. Too emotional. Too—

 

And then, before she could finish crumbling, N let out a quiet laugh.

 

Not mocking. Not mean. Just… warm. Light. The kind of laugh that melted tension like snow in the sun.

 

Uzi’s eyes snapped back to his face. He was smiling.

 

A real smile—small and genuine, like she’d said something that had truly made him happy. He looked at her with a softness that made her circuits short out a little.

 

Uzi blinked. The panic in her chest didn’t vanish, but it… shifted. Dulled into something more manageable, more warm than cold. N wasn’t judging her. He wasn’t annoyed or freaked out. In fact, from the look in his eyes… he looked like he might’ve been hoping she’d ask.

 

N’s fingers gently slipped from hers, the warmth of his palm fading with the release—though it was clear now, it wasn’t because he was pulling away. It was just so he could speak properly. He let out another breath of laughter, still light, still amused, and said her name with a fondness that almost made her want to crumble on the spot.

 

“Uzi…” he said, and for a moment his confidence—ever bright and boyish—wavered. He looked away, his brows drawing inward as if searching for the right words. His laugh faded, and the air between them grew softer, quieter. Then, he looked back at her, steady again. “You don’t have to ask.”

 

That simple sentence—spoken so earnestly, so sincerely—hit her like a jolt through the chest. Something about the way he said it, like it was the most obvious thing in the world, left her flushed and breathless. Her face burned hot, her processor practically overheating. She felt like her expression was short-circuiting, twitching somewhere between stunned, flustered, and ready to melt into a puddle.

 

So instead of trying to speak, she acted.

 

Uzi stepped forward in one fluid motion and wrapped her arms around N. Her hands found his back, fingers curling into the fabric of his jacket like they needed to anchor her there. There wasn’t a single second of hesitation from him—his arms moved just as quickly around her waist, pulling her in with a gentle firmness that made her breath catch in her throat.

 

The world dulled around them.

 

Uzi exhaled, slowly, the tension bleeding from her shoulders as she pressed herself into the hug. She tucked her face into the curve of his neck, right where his collar met his skin. The height difference made it awkward to rest her chin on his shoulder—this was better. Closer. More natural. It felt safe, like she could hide here forever.

 

And for the first time in what felt like forever, she caught herself smiling.

 

Not a forced, sarcastic smirk. Not one of those bitter grins she used to wear like armor.

 

A real, soft smile.

 

She felt the subtle shift of N’s posture, then the gentle weight of his chin resting on top of her head. His arms pulled her closer—tight enough to hold her, never enough to hurt. Just enough.

 

Uzi let her eyes drift shut. For this moment, for this quiet second in time, all the fear and doubt in her chest faded to static. She didn’t need to question if she was enough, or wonder if she deserved this. Right now… she just let herself exist. In his arms. And it was enough.

 

Uzi swayed with him ever so slightly, the soft rhythm of their embrace setting a calm tempo to the moment. There was no music—none that either of them could hear—but something about the way they leaned into each other made it feel like there was. The world, for once, wasn’t loud. It didn’t demand her attention or pull her thoughts in ten different directions. For the first time in what felt like ages… she was still.

 

And it felt good.

 

Too good, if she was being honest with herself. Which, unfortunately, she was starting to do more of lately.

 

Everything about this—about him—was unfamiliar. Not in a bad way, just… new. And that newness made her chest ache in ways she didn’t fully understand. She wasn’t used to feeling this safe, this cared for, this wanted. It stirred something warm and bright inside her—something that terrified her just as much as it comforted her.

 

She’d never admit out loud how much she actually liked this. Not without stumbling over her words or making some kind of snarky deflection to cover it up. But come on. How could she deny it anymore? Not when he was holding her like this. Not when her head fit perfectly against his chest, and his arms felt like they were made to pull her closer instead of push her away.

 

It was all strange. Wild. Fast.

 

 

A few days ago, she had been ignoring him. Then the party happened. And her room. She felt her core spike in temperature just thinking about those moments. The memory of his lips on hers, of his hand gently stroking her hair, the lazy grin he’d worn when he was absolutely not sober—it was all still there, tangled up in the recesses of her mind.

 

During that time, she’d overthought everything. Had practically convinced herself that the only reason he was being that soft, that bold, that close… was because he was high. Not his fault, sure, but it left her spiraling anyway. Wondering if any of it actually meant something. Wondering if he even remembered it clearly.

 

But now… he was fully present. Clear-headed. Sober. And yet—he was still here. Still holding her. Still pulling her in like it was the most natural thing in the world.

 

And that realization hit her like a shot to the chest.

 

It wasn’t the weed. It wasn’t the haze. It wasn’t a fluke or some kind of passing whim.

 

He wanted to be close to her. Just because he did.

 

The thought made her chest tighten and her thoughts scatter, her heart stammering in her ribs like it didn’t know what to do with itself. She held him tighter, if only to ground herself—to prove he was still real.

 

Because maybe, just maybe… she didn’t have to be alone in this anymore.

 

Uzi felt… calm. A strange kind of quiet satisfaction lingered in her chest like a soft echo. As much as she wanted to stay in this little pocket of warmth forever, she knew reality was just outside the haze. They had come all this way, down a tucked-away row of library shelves, just so she could tell him one crucial thing—and she had. Mission accomplished.

 

Still, she found herself reluctant to pull away.

 

With a slow breath and a quiet pang of hesitation, Uzi eased her arms back slightly. But before she could fully retreat, her gaze flickered—landing right at the base of his neck. That spot. The way the fabric of his shirt dipped just enough to reveal it, paired with the memory of the other night when he’d done the same thing to her…

 

The idea popped into her head like a spark.

 

She didn’t even think—she just moved. Leaned forward and pressed her lips against his neck, a soft, fleeting kiss. She felt the shiver run through him instantly—his whole frame tensed, stiff beneath her. That alone almost made her stifle a laugh. But instead of pulling back, she lingered for just a moment more, and then, very deliberately, she parted her lips and gave a quick, pointed nip.

 

Not enough to hurt. But definitely enough to mean something.

 

His reaction was immediate.

 

N went rigid, a sharp inhale catching in his throat. Uzi pulled away, an unrepentant smile pulling at her lips—a sheepish kind of smugness flickering in her eyes. When she glanced up at him, his face was an absolute mess of color. His cheeks were burning a deep crimson, his expression completely stunned. He looked like his entire brain had just short-circuited.

 

And frankly? That made it all the better.

 

She briefly recalled how mortified she had been that night when he’d done the same thing—out of nowhere, when her guard was down. Now it felt like karma. Playful, sweet-tasting karma.

 

N opened his mouth, clearly trying to speak, but whatever he was trying to say came out in nothing more than a quiet, flustered stammer.

 

Uzi, unfazed, turned on her heel with practiced nonchalance. “Come on,” she said over her shoulder, voice casual—almost too casual—like she hadn’t just fried his entire nervous system.

 

He blinked, dazed for a second longer before nodding quickly, still looking more pink than his usual white. His feet stumbled slightly as he followed her, as if he was trying to remember how to walk.

 

Uzi, meanwhile, didn’t let the grin leave her face. She was proud of herself, not just for pulling that off, but for owning it. It was bold, it was dumb, and it was so her—and the fact that he reacted like that?

 

Yeah. Totally worth it.

 

With that, the two of them finally stepped out from the maze of bookcases, their little private moment tucked away like a secret between the shelves, and returned to the soft quiet of the library proper—changed, just slightly, in a way only they could feel.

 

Uzi started toward the library doors, her footsteps quiet against the worn floor. Her hand hovered just over the metal push bar when something tugged at her—soft and subtle, but impossible to ignore. She paused. Then, with a faint inhale, she turned back around to face him once more.

 

N was still standing behind her, hands awkwardly stuffed into his jacket pockets, a faint blush still clinging to his cheeks. His eyes met hers, and that same gentle look was there—warm, a little dazed, but unmistakably kind.

 

Uzi shifted on her feet, then finally spoke, her voice a little softer than usual. “I’ll see you tomorrow… at school.”

 

It felt weirdly formal. Like acknowledging the return to routine after something so not routine had just happened. But she wasn’t really sure what else to say. That small goodbye felt like the only thing grounding her in the moment.

 

N blinked, then smiled—slightly crooked, like it came from somewhere honest. “Yeah. Tomorrow,” he replied, his voice quiet but certain. “Bye, Uzi.”

 

The way he said her name—it made something inside her tighten, like the echo of a feeling she couldn’t quite name.

 

She nodded once, quickly. “Bye.”

 

And with that, she finally turned, walking through the door and into the afternoon light beyond the library walls.

 

As she stepped out onto the familiar walkway that led toward the school’s front gates, her thoughts drifted. On the surface, everything felt normal—just another school day, ending like any other. She was going home. Simple. Ordinary.

 

Except… not really.

 

Because everything had shifted. Something between her and N had changed, in a way she could feel in her chest and the tips of her fingers. It wasn’t just what had been said, or what had happened—but the weight of it, the realness of it.

 

And the strangest part was that it didn’t feel scary. Not anymore.

 

She wasn’t sure what tomorrow would bring, but for the first time in a long time, she found herself hoping— actually hoping —that it would bring more moments like this.

 

Even if today had technically been normal… it was a kind of normal she could get used to.

Notes:

I LITERALLY LOVE THIS CHAPTER

I actually cooked with this istg

I really hope the pacing was okay, though. For a hot minute I thought it was too fast-paced, but after reading it like 4 times and editing it, maybe I’m js overthinking it 💔

N is such a sweetheart omfg

And Uzi is such a mess

I think this is the most actual emotion she’s shown in front of someone else out of the entire story 😭🤚

And when I said she cried, I didn’t mean like, messy crying and sobbing. She was more like, crying but not making any noise whatsoever. Have yall ever done that? Like, completely straight face, but you’re crying for whatever reason? That’s exactly what she was doing 💔

And then crying as u kiss someone is like the most heartbreaking thing ever istg ☹️ it really js depends on the circumstances though tbh. I don’t think in this specific situation it was that bad though cuz like, if I’m gonna be completely honest, Uzi is js a drama queen who doesn’t know she’s dramatic LMAO

The attachment issues and abandonment issues are coming in full swing 💔

It’s gonna be okay though (hopefully) since N is nice enough (I guess)

It’s not like Uzi’s gonna go home and over analyze every single thing that happened or anything idk 🤷

LMAO anyways, at least she was genuinely happy for like 5 minutes ig 😭

She’s js so conflicted abt everything and like it’s gonna take her forever to process it. Maybe that’s like a trauma response? Not because of this specific context obvi, but js having a hard time processing things. It def has to do with her moms death too, cuz like before she might have been kind of angsty, but she was js tryna find herself. But then her mom died and it really just fucked with her majorly, especially when she found out her dad basically lied to her abt the way her mom died for so long. Like, she had probably almost processed her moms death, beginning to come to terms with the fact that her mom died in an accident and there was nothing anyone could do, then she comes to find out that her mom was murdered?!?!!? Like I would be pissed too

She’s js overall really conflicted abt everything, not like anything in specific, that’s just how she is. Does that make sense? Like back to the whole having trouble processing things cuz of trauma.
Then constant overthinking causes her to stress tf out. Poor girl 😥

Hopefully one day, she’ll be able to work through everything, but who knows when that’ll be? 💔🥀

OK ANYWAYS IN OTHER NEWS

Idk if there’s gonna be a chapter tomorrow or now. I think I’ve mentioned that I’m kind of behind on writing, but I’m working on it. If updates are kind of slow or sporadic this week, I can 100% promise u that next week I’ll make it up to yall!!! My busy schedule has been killing me but it’s gonna get better soon, with summer and everything. I’m actually so excited istg 😖

So yeah if there’s no chapter tomorrow it’ll either be Wednesday or Thursday. I’ll comment in the comments of this chapter any updates on that if I need to, just so yall know

Ok that’s all I have to say this time. Thanks for reading me tap in my author’s notes 😭🤚

BYE 😵

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 60: Announcement

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The classroom was quiet, filled with the dull hum of early-morning exhaustion. Uzi slouched into her seat, eyes half-lidded as she pulled her notebook from her bag with one hand and fished out her pencil case with the other.

 

She dropped both onto her desk with a soft thud and flipped the notebook open, its pages already half-filled with little sketches, graphite smudges, and half-baked ideas. No way was she going to take notes—she never did, not when the repetition of morning lectures barely registered to begin with.

 

She grabbed a pencil from the case, then rested it against the paper with the faintest hint of purpose, but just before it met the page—

 

Ahem.

 

Uzi flinched, her eyes snapping up toward the front of the room.

 

The teacher stood there, clearing his throat with the usual gravelly tone of someone who had definitely not had enough sleep and had long since stopped trying to pretend otherwise. He adjusted his glasses, gave a tired glance across the room, and said, “Alright, before we begin—quick announcement.”

 

Uzi froze.

 

Her grip on the pencil stiffened, a subtle tightness winding into her shoulders. That sentence—it had weight now.

 

She remembered the last time he’d said something like that, how those words had been the prelude to everything going sideways. How everyone was instructed to meet in the gym during lunch. How the whole school corralled into the gym. How the principal forced himself to be calm. The stunned silence when they heard about the murder.

 

Her thoughts were already starting to spiral, anxiety rising like a slow tide, when the teacher spoke again—this time, in that awkward, half-hearted attempt at sounding upbeat.

 

“There’s going to be a field trip,” he announced, flatly. “It’s next week.” The room barely reacted. A few mutters. Some heads lifted, others stayed down. No one seemed particularly impressed.

 

Uzi stared, unmoving. A field trip? Seriously?

 

She didn’t relax right away. Her thoughts still lingered on the idea of something worse, the ghost of old panic flickering in her chest. But as it settled in that it wasn’t another disaster—just a trip, just another school-mandated event—she slowly let out the breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding.

 

After a moment, Uzi’s pencil hovered over the page again, but her thoughts were now somewhere else entirely.

 

The teacher rubbed his tired eyes before continuing. “Right. So—uh—this trip’s for juniors and seniors only. It’ll be five days total, and it’ll count toward your coursework in history, literature, and science.” He waved his hand vaguely in the air, as though that explained everything. “Basically, we’re combining the curriculum into something a little more… hands-on.”

 

He cleared his throat again, tone still flat. “If cost’s an issue, you can talk to the front office. They’ll figure something out with you. Don’t stress about it. And then, also…”

 

At that point, Uzi tuned the teacher out. Her pencil made a lazy swirl across her page, her thoughts slipping out of focus. Five days away from school? That was kind of a big deal. And it wasn’t just a day trip either. A whole week, off-campus, somewhere unfamiliar—that idea came wrapped in equal parts excitement and dread. What if it was awkward? What if something went wrong? What if she—

 

“Where are we going?” a voice interrupted from across the room.

 

Uzi blinked, barely registering the drone who’d asked. She looked up as the teacher glanced over his glasses and gave a short, unimpressed nod.

 

“New Ore City.”

 

Uzi sat bolt upright.

 

New Ore City?!

 

Her eyes widened a little despite herself, pencil still frozen in her grip. That name hit her like a jolt of static. She’d never been, obviously—but she’d heard stories. She’d seen the videos, the photos, the mess of headlines. It was loud. It was gritty. It was teeming with neon signs, deep alleys, subway stations packed like circuit boards, and barely affordable apartments so tiny they looked like closets. It sounded like absolute chaos.

 

And yet… it always fascinated her.

 

Something about that buzzing, manic city life had a strange kind of charm. She’d imagined walking those sidewalks, dodging between cranky commuters and street performers, maybe getting some greasy street food and wandering through the dense haze of artificial lights. It was ridiculous. Over the top. Practically cinematic.

 

But now she might actually get to see it.

 

Uzi leaned back slowly in her chair, biting the inside of her cheek to keep her expression neutral, though her mind buzzed with anticipation. Five days in New Ore City didn’t sound so bad anymore. In fact… it sounded kind of amazing.

 

-

 

Their usual corner near the humming vending machines had filled up fast, the scuffed floor tiles warmed by the midday light bleeding through the dusty windows. Uzi slid into her spot against the wall with a half-hearted sigh, dropping her lunch bag onto the floor.

 

Everyone around her got settled— Rebecca sat by Darren like usual, Emily across from her… N barely a few feet away beside her, also leaning against the wall. Thad was the last to sit, plopping down with a dramatic thud that shook the foil-wrapped snack in his hand.

 

“So,” Thad said, his voice echoing louder than it needed to, “you guys hear about that field trip thing yet?”

 

His tone was more statement than question, like he was daring someone to say they hadn’t.

 

Rebecca rolled her eyes, one leg casually draped over the other. “Duh. It’s literally all anyone’s been talking about since, like, first period.” She gestured with her soda can, as if the sheer obviousness of it drained her of the energy to elaborate.

 

Emily raised an eyebrow, brushing a stray strand of hair behind her ear, “Are you guys going?”

 

Rebecca answered first with a careless shrug. “Yeah, why not?”

 

Darren nodded. “For sure. Beats sitting through another week of sitting through boring ass lectures for seven hours straight.”

 

Thad grinned. “Obviously. I’d be bummed if I missed it. Five days away from this place? Count me in.”

 

Uzi glanced sideways as N, who shifted slightly where he sat next to her. He smiled softly as he spoke. “Probably,” he said after a beat. He tilted his head slightly, fidgeting with the straw of his juice box,“Just depends on… some personal stuff.”

 

That word stuck. Personal?

 

Uzi’s mind snapped to attention, her appetite forgotten. What personal stuff?  Did it have to do with her? A quiet flicker of panic curled at the edge of her thoughts. Was it about the disassembly drone thing?

 

She clenched her jaw slightly, resisting the sudden urge to shake her head like she could toss the idea out of her mind physically. No—come on. That was ridiculous. It probably had to do with his home life. Maybe his parent situation.

 

Besides, not everything revolved around her. She’s not that important.

 

Still… if he didn’t go, that would kind of suck. Not that it mattered. Not that she cared. But—well—if he wasn’t there, maybe the trip wouldn’t be worth it. Not that she was going for him,  obviously. Just…

 

Uzi realized she’d been quiet a bit too long. She forced herself to speak, casually as she could manage. “Probably,” she said, eyes flicking down to her food, voice even. “Depends how I feel, I guess.”

 

The words came out cooler than she intended, but she kept her tone level, her posture loose—hoping no one could hear the unspoken but only if he goes too lingering behind them.

 

Rebecca leaned forward, resting her chin in her hand as her gaze shifted toward Emily. “What about you?” she asked, her tone more curious than pressing.

 

Emily hummed for a moment, her expression tilting toward uncertain. “Might not be able to,” she admitted, tapping her fingers lightly against her thermos. “My parents are kind of… well, strict.”

 

She gave a small shrug, lips quirking in a resigned smile. “But if I tell them it’s for a grade or something important like that, they’ll probably go for it.”

 

Rebecca gave a nod of approval, smirking. “Smart. Definitely go with that.”

 

Before the thought could linger, Thad jumped in with a dramatic groan. “Yo—have you guys seen the English assignment? It’s insane.”

 

Darren exhaled sharply through his nose, clearly unimpressed, shaking his head, “Tell me about it.“

 

The others groaned in quiet agreement. Then, the group began to fall into a casual conversation. Like usual, it consisted mostly of the back-and-forth of daily complaints and banter, teasing and inside jokes. Just like any other regular day.

 

-

 

Uzi lounged on her bed, a controller loosely gripped in one hand as the glow of her TV lit the darkened room. The screen flashed Game Over , mocking her with blinking red letters.

 

She groaned, flopping back dramatically and muttering under her breath. With a sigh, she paused the game and dropped the controller onto the blanket beside her.

 

Reaching for her phone, she unlocked it with a quick tap, thumbing through her notifications. One unread message caught her eye—it was from the group chat. Curious, she opened it.

 

Stupid idiot robot (Thad 🤢) [4:45]: yo does any1 know wut day the trip is?

 

Uzi frowned slightly. She was about to type something, maybe a casual ‘next week, I think,’ but stopped. She didn’t actually know the exact day—it had just been vaguely mentioned. Before she could stew over it, a reply popped up.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [4:46 PM]: It’s next Monday. The bus will leave at 7:00 am, since it’s a long drive!

 

Uzi’s gaze lingered on his name a second longer than necessary. Monday… she mentally filed it away, trying to picture herself waiting at a bus station during the crack of dawn, still half-asleep.

 

Darrennn 𖦹ᯅ𖦹 [4:46 PM]: how long is the drive?

 

A pause. Then another message from N followed soon after.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [4:46 PM]: Not sure. I’ll check real quick.

 

Uzi stared at the screen, feeling strangely warm despite doing absolutely nothing. Then, a minute later, he responded.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [4:47 PM]: It’s about two and a half hours.

 

Stupid idiot robot (Thad 🤢) [4:47]: ughhh that sucks 🤧

 

Darrennn 𖦹ᯅ𖦹 [4:48 PM]: ikr

 

Uzi stared at her screen, the last few messages replaying in her mind. Two and a half hours on a bus… Well, for New Ore City, that wasn’t that  bad. Honestly, she’d expected worse. Still, the thought of being crammed on a bus that long made her twitch slightly. Who would she even sit with? What if there were assigned seats? The idea filled her with a quiet dread. Robo-god forbid that she didn’t have to sit by someone she didn’t know. That sounded like a total nightmare.

 

Her phone buzzed again, pulling her out of her spiraling thoughts.

 

Stupid idiot robot (Thad 🤢) [4:49]: hey N did u figure out if ur going or not?

 

She blinked, eyes scanning the text just as a new message appeared beneath it.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [4:49 PM]: Yeah, looks like I can go after all! :D

 

Uzi’s chest gave a tiny flutter before she could stop it, and she felt herself smile—just a little. Not the kind of grin she’d show anyone else, but one that crept in without permission. It was just nice, knowing he’d be there too. That… that made things feel a little easier.

 

Then she caught herself.

 

The smile dropped.

 

Ugh. Seriously? Why was she smiling like an idiot over that ? It wasn’t like it meant anything. It shouldn’t mean anything. He should just be another drone in their group. Just because they shared a weird, slightly tragic emotional connection and kissed a few times didn’t mean she had to—

 

Uzi exhaled sharply and dropped her phone onto the bed beside her. Enough of that. She picked up her controller again, squaring her shoulders as if preparing for battle. She could definitely beat that next level now. Probably. Maybe. Whatever—anything to get her mind off of him.

Notes:

Sigh

Ugh I’m so tired of Uzi 😫 IT’S OKAY TO ADMIT THAT YOU LIKE HIM

And like she literally did admit it out loud cuz like she told him she thinks she likes him a few chapters back (in her room 💔)

She’s js like in a deep seated denial atp

Like she knows she likes him but refuses to admit it to herself when she’s thinking about it. She’s like “oh cmon, who am I kidding, I know I like him” but then at the same time she’s just like “no actually I don’t. What am I talking about-“ but then obviously she does

Like girl get a grippp please 😭🙏

I can’t wait for this next arc to go into full swing like it’s gonna be so fun

Technically the last 3-4 chapters were kind of buildup to this part, like right after the party arc ended, but still super important stuff happened. Remember the last 2 chapters too cuz that’s gonna be relevant later, but that’s all I’ll say 🤭

I decided to call it New Ore City (get it? Like New York City 🤓☝️) but obviously none of this takes place on earth, so America doesn’t exist, and New York doesn’t exist. But they live in some sort of country with states or state-like places, idk I don’t think that’s important enough to think out..

But anyways yeah this is gonna be super fun and I have a bunch planned out. A lot of shit is gonna go down too so that’s exciting 😗

That’s pretty much all I have to say. As for when the next chapter is gonna come out - there’s a 50/50 chance that it comes out tomorrow. If I don’t post it tomorrow, I’ll post it Friday!! Still planning all of this through but like soon I’ll have enough written to where I can start posting consistently again.

Also super random, but have yall seen this new emoji? 🫩
I think it’s new and like it’s such a mood. If it’s not new though then I’m js blind LMAO

Okayyy byeee

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 61: Departure

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi’s alarm shrieked into the quiet of her room like a siren, cutting through the darkness with merciless urgency. She groaned, arm flailing out across the blankets toward her nightstand.

 

Her hand slapped the surface once. Missed. Then again. Still nothing. On the third try, her fingers connected with the alarm clock—just enough to send it crashing off the edge and onto the floor with a dull thud.

 

She lay there for a moment, face buried in her pillow, silently debating whether it was worth getting up at all. Maybe if she ignored it long enough, the morning would go away.

 

But the seconds ticked on, and with a groan louder than before, Uzi shoved the covers off and forced herself upright. She winced at the harsh red glow blinking from the floor.

 

6:00 AM.

 

Disgusting.

 

With a sigh, she leaned down, snatched the alarm off the floor, and hit the snooze button harder than necessary before setting it down on the top of her dresser. She stayed there for a second, motionless, rubbing at her tired eyes with the palms of her hands. A long yawn escaped her. Her limbs felt like lead, her brain still fogged with sleep.

 

Why was she even up this early?

 

Dragging herself to her bathroom as if she was on autopilot, she didn’t bother glancing at her reflection. She didn’t need a visual reminder of how wrecked she looked.

 

Instead, she cranked the sink on and splashed cold water over her face, letting the shock of it jolt her into full awareness.

And that’s when it hit her.

 

Right. The field trip.

 

Today.

 

She exhaled through her nose, bracing her hands on the edges of the sink, watching droplets fall from her chin to the porcelain. She had to be at school by 7:00 sharp. Which gave her—she glanced at the time—less than an hour to look alive, pack the last of her stuff, and somehow function as a regular drone in front of her friends.

 

Fantastic.

 

Uzi figured she might as well face the music—and by music, she meant her reflection. With a reluctant sigh, she lifted her gaze to the mirror above the sink.

 

Yikes.

 

She hissed quietly through her teeth, brows drawing together. Rough didn’t begin to cover it. Her hair looked like she’d wrestled with a static-charged blanket and lost. Dark circles hung beneath her eyes like bruises, stark against the pale metal of her face. She didn’t feel terrible—just tired in the way mornings always made her—but the mirror wasn’t doing her any favors.

 

With a small grunt, she reached for her hairbrush and began dragging it through the tangled mess. It snagged once. Twice. She winced, muttering under her breath, before finally wrangling the strands into something passable. Her bangs, at least, cooperated—barely.

 

Next came her toothbrush. She went through the motions out of routine more than anything, eyes half-lidded as the bristles scraped clean the taste of sleep from her mouth. When she finished, she paused, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear, and stared at her reflection again.

 

Still tired. Still a mess.

 

Still her.

 

She leaned forward slightly and cupped her hands under the faucet again, splashing another round of cold water onto her face. The jolt was just as bracing as before. She blinked rapidly, then grabbed a towel off the hook and patted her face dry.

 

This time, when she looked at herself, she didn’t cringe. She looked…awake. Not pretty, not polished—but functional. Presentable enough to survive the day without drawing attention. Probably.

 

She let out another quiet sigh, the kind that came from somewhere between resignation and acceptance, before turning away and stepping back into her room. Time to get dressed. Time to leave. Time to go see everyone.

 

Uzi shuffled toward her closet, rubbing one eye with the heel of her palm as she opened the door. If she was going to be trapped on a bus for nearly three hours, comfort was non-negotiable.

 

Her eyes flicked across the rows of clothes, most of which were varying shades of black, grey, or muted colors, until one piece caught her attention—a dark, worn green zip-up hoodie with a large grey star stitched front and center. Familiar. Soft. Reliable. That would do.

 

She tossed it onto the bed and headed for her dresser. With a practiced motion, she slid open the top drawer and grabbed a plain black tank top.

 

From the second drawer down, she retrieved her favorite pair of grey cargo-style sweatpants—loose, roomy, and lined with just enough fleece to make the cold morning a bit more bearable.

 

She pulled them on fast, teeth gritted slightly as she yanked the tank top over her head and fought with the twisted straps until everything finally sat right.

 

Next came the finishing touches. Uzi walked back to her dresser and opened her small jewelry box, fingers drifting over the metal until she found her usual rings—silver, minimal, slightly mismatched—and slipped them on one by one. She added a coyote claw necklace next, the one she always wore when she needed a little extra nerve. It was nothing fancy, but it felt like hers.

 

With that done, she glanced toward the duffle bag propped against her desk. Thankfully, she’d packed it last night—clothes, notebooks, charger, hygiene stuff, all the basics. She hoisted it up and slung it over one shoulder, then made her way to the door. Halfway there, she froze.

 

Her phone. And headphones.

 

Letting out a quiet, annoyed groan, she dropped the bag with a thud and hurried back to her dresser. Her phone was face down next to her alarm clock. She snatched it up, then fished her tangled headphones out from beside it. Crisis averted.

 

With her gear now fully accounted for, Uzi turned back, scooped up her bag again, and stepped out of her room. It was still too early, still too cold, and she still wasn’t convinced this trip would be anything other than exhausting—but… maybe it wouldn’t be all  bad.

 

-

 

Uzi stepped off the usual drab yellow school bus with a soft thud of her boots against the pavement, her breath catching faintly in the morning chill.

 

But instead of heading toward the main school building like any other day, she turned and walked further down the long stretch of the bus port. The usual morning hum of half-asleep students faded behind her as her eyes locked on something new.

 

A sleek, black-and-grey coach bus sat parked near the end, strikingly out of place among the usual clunky transports. Its polished surface gleamed faintly beneath the overcast sky, and emblazoned on the side was a high-definition image of a cheetah mid-sprint—stylized, wild, and fast. Definitely the bus to New Ore City.

 

Uzi's pace slowed for just a moment as she took it in. Huh. The school actually sprang for something decent. That alone was surprising enough to give her pause—but more than that, the realization hit her again: they were really going.

 

New Ore City.

 

A real trip, a real city, real chaos. The kind of place she’d only seen in movies or imagined while zoning out during class. Now it was just a few hours away.

 

A buzz of nervous energy stirred in her chest—half excitement, half the usual wariness she wore like armor. She adjusted the strap of her bag over her shoulder and walked closer, scanning the gathering crowd for familiar faces.

 

There. Near the front of the line. Emily and Rebecca stood off to the side, deep in conversation, their laughter faintly audible over the low morning noise. Uzi raised a hand in a tentative wave, the movement casual but hopeful.

 

Emily caught sight of her first and returned the wave with an easy smile.

 

Uzi felt her own expression lift in response, just slightly, and picked up her pace.

 

Her fingers tightened on the strap of her bag, pulling it more securely against her shoulder as she weaved through the crowd. The anxiety that had clung to her all morning hadn’t left exactly, but it was being outpaced—for now—by something else.

Something closer to anticipation.

 

When Uzi reached them, Emily turned first with a grin and gave a small wave. “Hey! There you are.”

 

Rebecca added, “Took you long enough,” with a teasing nudge to Uzi’s shoulder.

 

Uzi gave a tired half-smile in return, her voice dry. “Had to convince myself getting out of bed was worth it.”

 

Emily chuckled. “Totally fair. You excited for the trip?”

 

Uzi hesitated at that, her expression tightening for a second as she weighed the question. Was she excited? She hadn't figured that part out entirely. But after a brief pause, she nodded. “Honestly… I was kinda dreading it at first,” she admitted, rubbing the back of her neck, “but now? I actually can’t wait.”

 

Emily’s eyes lit up in recognition. “Yeah, I get that. Same here. I thought it was just gonna be another lame school trip, but since it’s New Ore City …it’s different.”

 

Very different,” Rebecca chimed in, practically bouncing on her heels. “I’ve actually been before, a couple years ago. I’m so stoked to go again.”

 

Uzi raised a brow, mildly surprised. “Wait, really? What was it like?”

 

Rebecca’s eyes gleamed as she waved her hand dramatically. “Exactly like you'd imagine—big, loud, totally overwhelming, but in a good way… though, way more rats than I expected. Like, I swear they run the place.”

 

Uzi let out a scoff of amusement, but the corners of her mouth tugged upward into a smile anyway. “Great. Can’t wait to meet our new rodent overlords.”

 

Despite the sarcasm, her mood had lifted. It felt good to joke around like this, to have the nervous tension in her chest soften—even if only a little—with the easy banter of drones she trusted.

 

A voice broke through their conversation as Darren approached, waving casually with a lazy grin. “Morning, nerds.”

 

Uzi lifted her hand in a half-hearted wave. “Wow, thanks for the warm welcome.”

 

Emily giggled. “Hey, Darren.”

 

Rebecca gave him a mock glare. “Excuse you, some of us are very cool.”

 

“Could’ve fooled me,” he shot back with a smirk, and then stepped in beside Rebecca, slinging an arm lazily around her shoulder.

 

She leaned into him with an easy smile, not missing a beat. “So, how’re you doing?”

 

Fantastic,” he said, dragging out the word like he didn’t fully believe it, but still wore that same laid-back grin. “We’re ditching class for five days, so yeah—can’t complain.”

 

Uzi watched the exchange, arms crossed lightly. There was something oddly grounding about how natural they were together—effortless, even. It made her stomach twist a little, though she didn’t know why.

 

Darren turned his attention back to the group. “So, did you guys throw your stuff on the bus yet?”

 

Rebecca gave a nod. “Yep, already in there. Found a decent spot in the middle section too—shockingly.”

 

Emily nodded as well. “I put mine in with hers. We got here kinda early.”

 

Uzi shifted her weight from one foot to the other and gave a small shrug. “Guess I could go do that now.”

 

Since she had basically just gotten there, she hadn’t quite had the chance to go but her bag away. But, she might as well now, before there were no spots for her bag left.

 

“I’ll be right back,” Uzi said, giving the group a short wave as she adjusted her bag on her shoulder. Her tone was casual, but there was a slight restlessness in her movements as she turned and started walking toward the back of the bus where the luggage compartments were.

 

She kept her eyes low, focused on the pavement beneath her feet—until a familiar shape caught in her periphery. Uzi glanced up, her breath catching for half a second when she saw N making his way toward her.

 

Of course it had to be him.

 

Her heart gave a traitorous little flutter before she quickly forced it down and plastered on a neutral expression.

 

“Hey,” she greeted, stopping mid-step.


N smiled at her, that soft, almost shy smile he always gave when it was just the two of them. “Morning.”

 

There was a brief pause—neither of them spoke right away, and Uzi could feel the awkward air stretching between them like taut string. She didn’t want to just walk away and make it worse, though, so she pushed through the discomfort and said the first thing that came to mind.

 

“You looking forward to the trip?” she asked, feigning a casual tone even though her chest still felt like it was reverberating with the effort of pretending to be chill.

 

N’s smile widened just a little, and he nodded. “Yeah. I can’t wait, actually. I’ve always wanted to go.”

 

Uzi’s eyes lit up at that. “Really? Same. It always looked so… I don’t know. Chaotic, in the best way.” Her voice was more animated now, despite herself.

 

He nodded again. “Exactly. It just seems like one of those places that never stops moving.”

 

Uzi felt a faint smile tug at the corner of her mouth. For a second, she forgot about the weight of her bag on her shoulder or the early hour or the nerves still buzzing beneath her skin.

 

There was something comforting in hearing that they shared the same quiet excitement—something about knowing she wasn’t the only one who felt like this trip might actually be something to look forward to.

 

N tilted his head slightly, eyes flicking up to meet hers. “What’re you most excited to see?” he asked, his voice quiet but curious, genuine.

 

Uzi blinked. The question caught her off guard. She hadn’t exactly thought about specifics—most of her excitement had been a vague hum in the background, not something she’d picked apart. She paused, her brow furrowing slightly in thought as she let out a soft hum.

 

“…Probably the streets at night,” she said at last, her tone a little softer, more honest. “I dunno, I just… hope it rains, honestly. The lights would look amazing in the reflection. It’d be like walking through a painting.”

 

Her voice trailed off as she imagined it—neon signs shimmering in puddles, the sound of distant traffic echoing between wet alleyways. She glanced at N again.

 

He was smiling.

 

“I hope it rains too,” he said quietly, like he was picturing the same thing. “That sounds… really wonderful.”

 

Their eyes met, and for a moment, neither of them said a word. The usual noise around them seemed to fall away, and all Uzi could focus on was the quiet warmth in N’s expression and how close he suddenly felt. Her lips twitched into a small smile, unguarded and fleeting.

 

But then she caught herself—too fast, too vulnerable. She quickly pulled her gaze away, clearing her throat as she shifted her weight.

 

“Anyway,” she muttered, looking down, “I should, uh… go put my stuff away. That’s what I was doing, you know, before I—yeah.” She finished her sentence with a laugh. It came out awkward and a bit rushed, and her eyes fixed anywhere but on N.

 

Just as she started to turn, N’s voice stopped her.

 

“Wait,” he said gently.

 

Uzi turned back, puzzled, a faint crease of confusion between her brows. “What is it?”

 

She could feel her pulse quicken—uncertain, curious, and already bracing herself for whatever was about to come next.

 

N hesitated, his eyes flicking to the side before returning to Uzi with a sheepish grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Hey… I was wondering,” he said, a little unsure, “do you maybe wanna sit with me on the bus?”

 

Uzi didn’t even blink. “Sure.”

 

She said it fast.

 

Too fast.

 

Her response had slipped out before she could control it, far too eager for her own liking. Heat rushed to her face the moment she heard herself— seriously? She was merely saying yes to sitting next to someone, but it was weird how quickly she had said it. Like it wasn’t worth a second thought. Like the answer was obvious.

 

Still, her brain scrambled to explain the sudden embarrassment that burned beneath her wires.

 

Why was  this embarrassing? There was nothing weird about it… except maybe the way he smiled right after, that warm, relaxed kind of smile that made her chest feel tight and fluttery all at once. She hated that it made her feel like this—like her internal processor had skipped a beat.

 

N, luckily, didn’t seem to notice anything off about her reaction. He simply nodded and smiled at her again, completely at ease. “You said you were going to put your bag away, right?”

 

“Yeah,” Uzi replied quickly, relieved to shift focus. She adjusted the strap on her shoulder again.

 

“I could help, if you wa—"

 

“N!”

 

The sudden voice sliced into the moment. Both of them turned toward it instinctively.

 

Uzi followed the sound with her eyes and spotted V standing a short distance away, waving lazily. She called his name again, sharper this time, followed by, “Come here!

 

N blinked, clearly caught a little off guard. He glanced back at Uzi, his smile now slightly apologetic. “Sorry,” he said gently. “I’ll see you in a bit?”

 

He gave her one last quick wave before turning and jogging off in V’s direction.


Uzi lifted her hand in return. “Yeah. See you.”

 

She watched him go, something in her expression softening—though she’d never admit it aloud. There was still a quiet warmth stirring inside her, even as she turned back toward the bus, doing her best to ignore the way her chest still felt tight.

 

Uzi finally reached the rear of the bus, where the storage compartment door stood wide open. Inside was a metal shelving system that looked decently organized—if not already overpacked. The lowest shelf and the one right above it were stuffed to the brim with duffel bags, backpacks, and suitcases crammed together like a puzzle gone wrong.

 

She exhaled sharply through her nose, clearly unimpressed. “Great,” she muttered, irritation pricking at her tone.

 

Shrugging off her backpack, she eyed the remaining top shelf. There was a solid amount of open space, thankfully, but it sat just high enough to be an annoyance. Uzi narrowed her eyes at it like it had personally offended her. She could reach it. Probably. Maybe.

 

Balancing on the tips of her boots, she hoisted her bag over her head with a small grunt of effort. It was heavier than she remembered. Her arms strained as she tried to shove it onto the shelf, her fingers fumbling for a grip. The shelf didn’t budge. The bag didn’t slide. And her patience was thinning.

 

A soft chuckle broke the silence behind her.

 

Uzi froze mid-reach, instantly recognizing the voice. She didn’t even need to turn around to know who it was. She did anyway, scowling over her shoulder.

 

Thad stood a few feet back, grinning like he’d caught her in a crime. “You need some help, or…?” he asked, his tone deliberately amused.

 

Uzi’s glare didn’t falter. “What do you think , genius?”

 

He only laughed again, stepping up beside her with a smug kind of ease. “Step aside, short stack,” he said, gently taking the bag from her hands before she could object. With little effort, he swung it up and onto the top shelf, adjusting it until it was secure.


Then, he exaggeratedly dusted off his hands like he’d just accomplished a grand feat. “There. Crisis averted.”

 

Uzi completely ignored the fact that he had just called her short stack. She just crossed her arms and rolled her eyes, unimpressed. “Thanks, I guess.”

 

Thad shot her a crooked smirk. “Don’t mention it.”

 

For a moment, neither of them said anything. Uzi glanced sideways at him, skeptical.

 

“…Do you need something?” she asked.

 

Thad raised an eyebrow at her tone. “Yikes. Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed.”

 

“Shut u—”

 

“Relax,” he cut in with a casual wave of his hand. “I just saw you struggling and figured I’d be a nice guy. You know, lend a hand.”

 

He flexed an arm with mock pride, giving her a pointed look. “Not every drone is blessed with my height and peak physical performance.”

 

Uzi scoffed, the corner of her mouth twitching into a reluctant smirk. “You wish , Thad.”

 

Still, as annoying as he was, she couldn’t deny the help had come in handy. Not that she’d ever  give him the satisfaction of saying that out loud.

 

Thad gave a dramatic gasp, clutching his chest like Uzi had mortally wounded him. “Wow. The attitude.  And here I was just trying to help a vertically challenged classmate,” he teased, shaking his head like he couldn’t believe her lack of gratitude.

 

Uzi stared at him, jaw slack. “You did not  just say that to me.”

 

But Thad only grinned wider, his eyes glittering with mischief. He reached up and casually slapped his hand against the top of the bus shelf where he’d placed her bag, as if to punctuate his next statement. “What is this, like… five feet?”

 

That was it.

 

Uzi shoved him, hard enough to send him stumbling a few steps back with a startled laugh. “I’m not that short!” she barked, bristling. “I’m five-two and a half, thank you very much—!”

 

Thad caught himself, still laughing as he straightened his jacket. “You sure? That half inch is doing a lot of heavy lifting.”

 

Uzi gave him the deadliest glare she could muster, arms crossed and foot tapping, but the corner of her mouth was twitching despite her best efforts. As annoying as Thad was, it was hard to stay actually mad at him—he just had that obnoxious, chaotic energy that was impossible to fight off completely.

 

“Making you mad never gets old,” he said with a grin, clearly proud of himself.

 

Uzi opened her mouth to fire something back—but paused when Thad suddenly cut in, his voice less smug now, more casual.

 

“Hey,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck briefly before meeting her eyes again. “You, uh… wanna sit with me on the bus ride?”

 

Uzi blinked.

 

What?

 

Of all the things she thought he might say next—some new height joke, some sarcastic quip—that definitel y hadn’t been one of them.

 

Her expression faltered. Not in a bad way—just… surprised. Something in her brain scrambled to catch up to the question. Her mouth opened slightly, but no sound came out for a second. Why was he asking her that? Was he just being nice? Or did he actually want to?

 

Her thoughts tumbled awkwardly into each other, caught off guard and unprepared.

 

Uzi blinked, folding her arms slowly across her chest as she processed what Thad had just asked. Her voice came out steady—maybe a little smug—as she replied, “Yeah… N already asked me, actually. Sorry.”

 

She tried to keep it casual, offhand, like it wasn’t a big deal. Because it wasn’t. But as soon as the words left her mouth, she saw it—Thad’s expression twitched ever so slightly. His brow dipped, and something flickered behind his eyes. Confusion, maybe. Disappointment? And then, when she said N’s name, there was a shadow of something else entirely that passed over his face—something unreadable, quick, but sharp enough to leave Uzi blinking.

 

Huh.

 

She hesitated, then tilted her head a little, squinting at him like she could read his mind if she looked hard enough. When the silence between them began to feel weird, she shrugged and offered, “You could, uh… sit with me on the ride back, though. If you want.”

 

It wasn’t a huge deal. She didn’t know why she said it—maybe to smooth things over, or maybe just because the look on his face threw her off. Either way, it worked. Thad blinked, like snapping out of a daze, and recovered with a lopsided smirk.

 

“Pfft. Of course,” he said, voice light and cocky. “That was totally the plan.”

But it didn’t feel quite right. His usual smugness was there, sure—but his eyes didn’t quite match it. Uzi noticed. She wasn’t going to say anything about it, though. Whatever that  moment was, she didn’t feel like unpacking it. Not now. Maybe not ever.

 

There was a beat of silence before Thad cleared his throat and glanced around. “You seen the others?”

 

“Yeah,” Uzi nodded, already turning to walk. “I was with Rebecca, Emily, and Darren earlier. Was gonna head back to them.”

 

“Cool,” Thad said simply, falling into step beside her. “I’ll come with.”

 

And just like that, the conversation shifted. They didn’t say anything else for now, both of them walking side by side toward the front of the bus. Uzi’s mind lingered for a moment on Thad’s expression earlier—on that strange flicker when she’d said N’s name—but she shook it off.

 

No point in overthinking it.

 

The walk back to the group was quiet, but in a way that didn’t feel strained. Neither of them had anything to say, and that was fine. The air between them had settled back into something neutral, and Uzi welcomed the moment of calm.

 

When they finally reached the shaded stretch of pavement where they’d left the others, only Emily remained—scrolling through her phone, earbuds loosely dangling from her hoodie’s pocket. She looked up as they approached.

 

“Oh hey,” Emily said, giving a small wave. “What took you so long?”

 

Uzi offered a smirk. “Yeah, we got sidetracked. Where’d Rebecca and Darren go?”

 

“They already got on the bus,” Emily replied, gesturing over her shoulder with a nod. “Didn’t want to lose a good seat, I think.”

 

Thad perked up a little at that. “Are we leaving soon?”

 

“Probably five minutes,” Emily said, checking her phone briefly. “That’s what they said earlier.”

 

“Cool.” Thad stretched slightly, then tilted his head toward her. “Wanna sit with me?”

 

Emily looked mildly surprised for half a second, then shrugged with a small smile. “Sure. I didn’t have anyone to sit with yet anyway.”

 

Uzi caught the way Thad flicked a quick glance sideways at her. It was subtle, just a flicker of motion in the corner of her vision—but she saw it. And then, just as quickly, he looked away, feigning disinterest like he hadn’t just checked to see if she was watching.

 

She rolled her eyes at him, lips quirking. Classic Thad. Always trying to get a reaction. She knew he was just being obnoxious—Right…? And yet, that off-beat flicker from earlier still nudged at the back of her mind. Something about it didn’t sit right.

 

Whatever.

 

Emily pulled her backpack more securely over her shoulder. “Might as well go now, right? Beat the rush.”

 

“Yeah,” Thad agreed, already turning to walk.

 

Uzi moved to follow them, but after a few steps, she slowed and glanced around. “I’m gonna go find N,” she said quickly.

 

Emily looked back and gave a quick wave. “Okay! Good luck.”

 

Thad just tossed a hand up over his shoulder in a lazy, wordless goodbye.

 

And with that, Uzi turned in the opposite direction, her pace picking up. She wasn’t exactly sure where N was, but her feet were already moving, propelled by something that made her heart pick up just a little.

 

Maybe it was anticipation. Maybe it was nerves. Maybe it was both.

 

Uzi’s gaze swept across the lot, scanning the clusters of students still milling about. Then—there. A familiar figure near the edge of the bus line, standing alone, shifting on his feet like he wasn’t quite sure where to go. N. He was looking around, head tilting slightly—searching? For her?

 

She lifted a hand and called out, “Hey!”

 

The moment he saw her, his whole expression lit up. That soft, subtle smile he always wore brightened as he quickly crossed the pavement to meet her, like she was the exact drone he’d been hoping to find.

 

“You wanna go grab a seat now?” Uzi asked as he approached, trying to sound casual. “Before all the decent ones get snatched.”

 

N nodded, a light chuckle in his voice. “I was just about to ask you the same thing.”

 

A traitorous smile tugged at the corners of Uzi’s mouth, and she immediately turned on her heel to hide it. No way. Absolutely not —he was not going to catch her grinning like an idiot just because he was thinking the same thing she was. That was not happening.

 

She strode ahead toward the bus entrance, adjusting the collar of her zip-up hoodie as if to mask her expression, her thoughts scrambling behind her neutral façade.

 

She wasn’t smiling because of him, obviously. It was just… awkward. Even though it wasn’t. Sure. That’s all. A reflex. A defense mechanism, even. She wasn’t going to read into it—nope.

 

Definitely not.

 

Still, as she reached the door and hesitated to glance over her shoulder, she saw him trailing after her, that same quiet, contented look on his face.

 

He looked so at ease it was almost annoying. Almost.

 

They climbed aboard together, the inside of the bus already filling up. The middle seats were mostly taken, of course. Everyone’s favorite neutral zone. Not too close to the front, but not socially dangerous like the back—just safe enough to blend in.

 

Uzi, however, never had much interest in blending in.

 

She slowed as she took in the layout and turned toward N. “Wanna try the back row? If it’s still open.”

 

He glanced toward the rear of the bus and nodded. “Sure. That sounds great.” His voice was light, agreeable. No hesitation. And something about the way he said it—genuine and easy—made her stomach turn in that dumb, fluttery way again.

 

She pretended not to notice.

 

They moved toward the back of the bus together, weaving between the narrow aisle and the hum of idle conversations. When they finally reached the last row, Uzi’s eyes scanned over the seat—and a quiet, victorious breath escaped her.

 

“Perfect,” she muttered under her breath, a subtle grin tugging at her mouth.

 

The entire back row was untouched. She immediately claimed the spot on the left, sliding in and dropping into the seat by the window like it had been waiting for her. That view—the full stretch of the road behind them, nothing in the way—this was exactly what she’d wanted.

 

N sat down beside her, careful to leave a polite bit of space between them. His posture was relaxed but mindful, hands folded in his lap, gaze flicking briefly toward her and then out the window.

 

Uzi rested her hands on the seat in front of her, flexing her fingers once, then again, trying to ease out some of the weird, twitchy energy buzzing in her limbs.

 

“I can’t wait to get going,” she said, glancing sideways at him.

 

N nodded lightly. “Yeah. Me too.”

 

There was a softness to his voice, like he meant it—not just about the trip, maybe, but about sitting here too.

Notes:

Ugh sorry for the long wait 🤧

I think this chapter is like, relatively long, so hopefully that makes up for it. I have so so much planned.

What did u think abt this chapter? This is new - I’m so excited cuz *so much* stuff is gonna go down soon.

On another note, the next 2 (maybe 3? Probably 2) chapters are gonna be of the actual bus ride, so that’s fun

Who knows what’ll happen 🤷

And then abt this chapter -

I wonder why Thad was acting so weird 🤔

Who knows

At least Uzi noticed, but she’d def not really thinking much into it ig cuz like, technically nothing happened. Maybe she’s just overthinking - who knows 🤷

UGH ANYWAYS AGAIN IM SO EXCITED FOR WHAT’S TO COME 😫😫

A solid amount of drama, angst, hurt, and comfort - I hope 🤞

But again, who knows 😈

Ok that’s all I have to say for now

No chapter tomorrow since it’s Sunday. Next chapter will be posted Monday‼️

See yall then 🫶

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 62: Small Talk

Notes:

CW: References to self-harm

(Dw though it’s not abt Uzi or N 😭 - you’ll understand when u read the chapter.)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi let her head tip back against the seat, blinking slowly. “I love long rides. Like—bus rides, car rides. Any of it. Just watching the world go by while you don’t have to do anything.”

 

N laughed, almost apologetically. “I’m kind of the opposite. I like moving around too much. Being stuck in one spot for hours makes me restless.”

 

Uzi snorted. “Yeah, no. Couldn’t be more different. I thrive  in closed-off spaces where no one’s trying to make small talk.”

 

She paused, letting herself lean back more comfortably, arms now resting at her sides. Her gaze wandered to the window beside her, the glass still slightly foggy from the morning chill.

 

“Being around drones all day is exhausting,” she added flatly. “I’ve got like, zero social battery.”

 

Her voice wasn’t bitter, just matter-of-fact, almost a little dry with an edge of humor. But in truth, Uzi meant every word. Talking, maintaining eye contact, reading everyone’s weird little expressions—it was a chore.

 

She had her limits. And this bus ride, ideally, would be her chance to unplug. Sort of.


Except… with N here beside her, she didn’t feel all that drained. Just... hyper-aware.

 

Uzi turned her head, resting her temple against the cool window for just a moment before glancing over at N. “What about you?” she asked. “You seem like... I don’t know. A social butterfly.”

 

N blinked, surprised by the observation, then gave a sheepish shrug. “I guess I kind of am,” he admitted with a light smile. “It’s nice meeting new drones. Talking, learning about them... but I usually stick with a small group of close friends.”

 

There was something gentle in the way he said it—not dismissive or self-important, just honest. Comfortable in his skin, even if he didn’t always know what to do with that ease.

 

Uzi nodded slowly. “Yeah... I get that.”

 

She looked ahead, but her smile lingered faintly. There was a flicker of something behind her expression—something softer, more thoughtful.

 

“It’s been nice,” she said after a beat, voice quieter now, less guarded. “Having an actual friend group again.”

 

She didn’t really mean to say that part out loud. The last part— again. It just kind of slipped out. She added, almost under her breath, “It’s been a while since I had that…”

 

N’s eyes shifted to her fully, and for a moment he didn’t say anything. His features softened, brows tilting just slightly in quiet empathy. He looked like he understood exactly what she meant, even without the details.

 

He parted his lips, like he was about to say something—maybe something meaningful—but the bus jolted under them with a slight mechanical groan.

 

Uzi instinctively braced herself with a hand on the seat in front of her, while N looked up and over.

 

Both of them glanced past the tops of the seats. Drones were filing in now, some laughing, others chatting as they tried to find their seats. The stillness of the bus was quickly swallowed up by the rising din of voices and shifting footsteps.

 

Uzi watched it all unfold with a blank expression, before slowly sinking back into her seat.

 

So much for the quiet moment.

 

She didn’t say anything right away. But in her chest, there was a subtle ache—an awareness that they’d been on the verge of something real, and now it had slipped away just as easily as it had arrived.

 

A low hiss cut through the air as the bus doors sealed shut, the final few drones settling into their seats with last-minute chatter and laughter.

 

The speakers above crackled, and the driver’s voice came through, warm and enthusiastic but distorted just enough to remind everyone it was still a school field trip.

 

“Alright, who’s ready to go to New Ore City?

 

A loud cheer erupted from the students scattered across the bus. Applause followed—not thunderous, but full of genuine excitement. The buzz of anticipation swelled like a wave.

 

N clapped along with the others, smiling easily as he joined in. Uzi, however, stayed quiet. Her hands remained in her lap, and her expression was unreadable.

 

She was excited. She was. But something about the cheer, the sudden rush of noise and movement after that quiet, personal moment with N—it left her feeling strangely disconnected.

 

The engine rumbled to life beneath them, vibrating faintly through the floor of the bus. With a soft lurch, they began to pull away, the scenery outside the windows slowly shifting as the school receded into the distance.

 

Uzi turned to look out the window, her reflection barely visible against the morning light. She rested her head against the glass, cool and slightly foggy. Her shoulders sank with a breath she didn’t quite realize she was holding.

 

So much for having a quiet start to the ride.

 

After a moment, she shifted back in her seat and glanced at N. Her gaze flicked past him—toward the empty seat across the aisle.

 

No one had sat there.

 

Good.

 

It meant they had some privacy—some space to actually talk without some other drones looming nearby, listening in or interrupting. The kind of quiet she craved, where she didn’t have to watch her words or pretend she wasn’t constantly overthinking everything she said around N.

 

She didn’t say anything just yet. But the faint tension in her shoulders eased, if only a little.

 

N was watching her again, quiet and calm, the way he always did when he seemed fully present—no distractions, no mask. His smile was soft, almost absentminded, like he was simply content to be there next to her. It made Uzi’s chest tighten a little, which was annoying. She ignored it.

 

Instead, she shifted slightly in her seat, tilting her head toward him and speaking as casually as she could manage. “Hey… the other day, you mentioned you might not have been able to come on the trip. Why was that?”

 

The moment the words left her mouth, she regretted them. Not because she didn’t mean them—she was curious—but because she hadn’t meant to catch him off guard.

 

And that’s exactly what she did.

 

N’s smile faltered almost immediately. It didn’t fade entirely, but it thinned at the edges, and a flicker of something unreadable passed behind his eyes. Surprise, maybe. Hesitation. Whatever it was, it wasn’t nothing. He blinked once, as if trying to recalibrate, and said, “Oh. Uh, about that…”

 

Uzi instantly felt a pang of guilt. Great. Nice job, idiot.

 

She raised her hands slightly in a peace-offering gesture and gave him a quick shake of her head. “You don’t have to tell me. I shouldn’t have asked—my bad…”

 

But N just shook his head back, a reassuring smile tugging at the corner of his mouth again—gentler this time, though something in it still looked distant. “No, it’s okay. I don’t mind.”

 

She wasn’t fully convinced, but she didn’t push.

 

He paused again, longer this time. Like he was working out how to say what he wanted to say—or whether he should say it at all. His eyes dropped to the floor of the bus, and his fingers lightly fidgeted with the hem of his sleeve before he spoke again.

 

“I have a younger sister.”

 

Uzi blinked. “You do?”

 

That... genuinely surprised her. He’d mentioned bits and pieces about his past before—when they had somewhat deep conversations, but he spoke about it like it didn’t bother him. His parents being absent, his grandma raising him before she passed, and how he’d sort of just handled things on his own after that. But he had never  said anything about a sister.

 

The realization settled over her slowly.

 

He had a sister.

 

That meant it hadn’t just been him  on his own all this time. It meant everything he’d told her before—about figuring things out alone, keeping himself together, somehow always managing to be cheerful—it hadn’t just been for himself.  He’d been doing that while looking after someone else, too.

 

And suddenly, she felt like she’d stepped somewhere she hadn’t meant to.

 

Somewhere private. Fragile.

 

Still, she couldn’t help the way her thoughts tangled up. He didn’t deserve that kind of pressure. He never acted  like he was carrying it. If anything, he was always the one trying to lift the mood, make everyone else feel at ease.

 

He didn’t seem   like someone who’d had to grow up too fast, and yet…

 

Uzi didn’t speak, not yet. She just looked at him, quietly processing.

 

Uzi shifted in her seat, her metal fingers brushing idly against the seams of the vinyl cushion. She hesitated for a second, debating if she should keep going. But curiosity—mixed with a quiet sense of concern—got the better of her.

 

“So… do you take care of her?” she asked, her tone light, trying not to sound like she was prying even though she clearly was.

 

Inwardly, she braced herself. He’d already said it was fine, that he didn’t mind talking about it. But still, part of her couldn’t shake the guilt, like she was dragging him somewhere he didn’t owe her access to.

 

And yet—he didn’t look annoyed or shut-off.

 

If anything, he still looked… open. Relaxed, even. Like talking to her wasn’t a chore.

 

N gave a small shrug, resting his elbow on the side of the seat and leaning into it. “Sort of,” he replied. “It’s complicated.”

 

That answer only raised more questions, but Uzi bit them back. She didn’t want to push—again. If he wanted to explain, he would.

 

And he did.

 

“She came home recently,” he added, glancing at her briefly before looking out at the seat in front of them. “I just… needed to see how things would be before I left.”

 

Uzi blinked. That made her pause.

 

Home recently? That phrasing felt weird. What did he mean, came home ?

 

Curiosity got the better of her again, and this time, she couldn’t ignore it. “Wait—what do you mean she came home recently?”

 

N didn’t answer right away. His posture shifted a little, less casual now, more guarded. But not completely closed off. After a few seconds, he exhaled and replied, quieter this time, “She’s in and out of the hospital a lot. She has… problems.”

 

Uzi’s heart dropped. She lifted her hand to her mouth instinctively, eyes widening just slightly. “Oh. She’s sick?”

 

Was it cancer? Something worse? The thought made her stomach twist. Why had she even asked?

 

“I’m so sorry,” she said quickly, voice softer now. “I didn’t mean to—”

 

But N shook his head before she could finish, brushing off her apology with a faint, tired smile. “It’s okay,” he said again, though there was a different weight to it this time.

 

Then, almost absently, he nodded. “Yeah… it’s bad.”

 

He paused.

 

For a moment, Uzi thought he was done—but then she saw something flicker behind his eyes. A brief blankness. Like a thought dawning on him, and not a pleasant one.

 

Then his expression shifted—gentle, but firm.

 

“I mean—she’s not, like… physically sick,” he clarified, quietly. Then, slowly, he brought his hand up to point at his head,”It’s up here. She’s got issues here.”

 

Uzi’s gaze followed his hand, the gesture hitting harder than any word might’ve.

 

Her mind reeled slightly, trying to piece that together. A sister who needed care.

 

Hospitals. Mental illness. And N had been dealing with all that this whole time—and never once acted like it was dragging him down.

 

No wonder he’d hesitated to talk about it.

 

Uzi caught the flicker in N’s face—just a subtle shift, but enough for her to realize he’d guessed what she’d assumed earlier. That his sister was sick in the way most drones meant when they said someone was sick.

 

But before she could get a word in to apologize again, N spoke. “Her name’s Cyn, by the way,” he said gently, eyes cast downward like the name itself weighed more than it should. “She hasn’t really been getting worse or anything… just… not better.”

 

There was a tired steadiness to his tone, like he’d repeated that same sentence to himself a hundred times before—maybe to friends, maybe just in his own head. Like it had become his standard way of framing something he couldn’t fix.

 

Uzi scratched at the back of her neck, her fingers clumsy. “So… you said she came home recently, right?”

 

N gave a nod. “Yeah.”

 

Uzi hesitated, her voice softer when she asked, “How was that?”

 

Another pause, this one stretched thinner. N finally sighed, long and quiet.

 

“Like usual.”

 

That answer wasn’t what she was expecting, and yet… it made a strange kind of sense. Routine and chaos could coexist in a situation like his, couldn’t they?

 

He went on, his voice more subdued now. “I might not’ve been able to come on the trip if she’d stayed. I was supposed to watch her. But she got sent away again right before.”

 

That phrasing— sent away —stung in a way Uzi didn’t fully understand, but the way he said it made it sound more like a necessary evil than a choice. Her eyes flicked to his expression, and sure enough, his face had gone tight. Guilty. Resentful. Like he hated the very fact that he had to say it out loud.

 

“She comes home sometimes,” N continued, still not meeting her gaze. “But eventually, I have to call my parents. Ask them to get someone to send her back. Again.”

 

Uzi’s frown deepened. That was… awful. And it wasn’t just the situation—it was the fact that he had to be  the one managing it. She couldn’t imagine the pressure, or how alone that had to feel.

 

She opened her mouth to ask what Cyn’s condition actually was, but faltered. He’d been so vague, and she didn’t want to push. But apparently, she didn’t have to.

 

Almost like he could sense her confusion, N leaned in just slightly, lowering his voice.

 

“She hurts herself,” he murmured, barely audible over the hum of the bus. “That’s why she needs help. I can’t… I can’t always be there to stop it.”

 

His gaze didn’t waver from the space between his hands. No dramatics. No tears. Just honesty.

 

Uzi felt something clench in her chest. That wasn’t just heavy—it was haunting. How had he carried that so quietly? And why hadn’t he said anything sooner?

 

She suddenly didn’t know what to say. But whatever she did say… she knew it had to matter.

 

Uzi stayed quiet for a moment, her gaze flicking from N’s hands to his face, watching how he held himself. He didn’t look tense.

 

Just... tired. Like the words were worn smooth from how often he’d had to say them.

 

Still, she hesitated. “Can I ask… how long has this been happening?”

 

Her voice was soft—measured—careful not to prod too hard. She didn’t want it to sound like she was interrogating him. Ugh, what if it did sound like that? What if he thought she was just being nosy? But no—he didn’t flinch. He didn’t shift away. If anything, N looked like he still felt okay, maybe even safe  sharing this with her.

 

That thought made her chest tighten, a warm ache blooming in the center of it.

 

N gave a small shake of his head. “She wasn’t always like this.”

 

His voice was quiet, but not unsure. Just remembering. “When we were younger, we were really close,” he said, and there was a faint, almost invisible smile tugging at his lips—just a ghost of a memory lingering in his expression. “We used to play outside a lot. Go on little adventures. She always followed me everywhere.”

 

Uzi could almost picture it—Cyn as a little kid, trailing behind N, probably bossing him around and laughing way too loud. And N, smiling right back at her.

 

N’s smile faded. “But that was before the accident…”

 

He didn’t wait for her to ask. It was like once he started, he couldn’t stop.

 

“She got hurt one day. Hit her head really hard. Concussion. A bad one.

 

His fingers curled slightly against his leg, and Uzi noticed the way his shoulders slumped just a little.

 

He sighed silently,“She wasn’t the same after that.”

 

Uzi didn’t interrupt. She just listened, heart aching with every word. And even though she wasn’t sure what to say yet, she knew one thing for certain: she was grateful  he trusted her enough to say it.

 

N’s voice stayed low as he continued speaking, nearly being lost beneath the hum of the bus engine and the occasional bursts of laughter or chatter from a few rows ahead. But Uzi didn’t miss a word.

 

“She had to relearn how to walk, for a while,” he said, his tone almost mechanical, like he’d repeated these facts so many times they didn’t feel real anymore. “The concussion messed up her coordination. Her balance was off. She did physical therapy for months. Got better, mostly. But…”

 

He hesitated. Uzi didn’t say anything, didn’t push. She just kept her gaze steady, letting him take his time.

 

“But emotionally,” N went on, quieter now, “it was like she came back… different. Her personality just—shifted. At first it was small stuff. She’d get annoyed more easily, or zone out at weird times. Then it got worse.”

 

He paused again, a flicker of sadness crossing his face like a shadow. “She got mean. Not loud or violent, not like in movies or anything. Just—passive-aggressive. Cold. If something upset her, she’d twist it back on you. Say stuff she knew would hurt. And I guess I didn’t handle it great.”

 

His voice caught slightly at the end, and Uzi felt her fingers twitch in her lap. She wished she knew what to say. Anything that didn’t sound useless.

 

N’s eyes flicked to her, just briefly. He saw she was still listening, still focused— present.  Something in his expression softened at that. Like he felt understood, or maybe just seen.

 

“There was this one time,” he said after a breath. “We got into this fight. A big one. I don’t even remember what started it, but I snapped. I was tired, and angry, and I yelled at her. I asked why she couldn’t just… be normal.”

 

His voice cracked on the last words, barely above a whisper. He looked away, blinking hard. The guilt that flickered across his face was raw, unfiltered.

 

“I didn’t mean it like that. I just— I didn’t know what else to say. I was stupid.”

 

Uzi stayed still, eyes wide but unreadable, her heart thudding. She wanted to tell him it wasn’t his fault, but something told her that right now, what he needed wasn’t comfort. It was space to speak.

 

He turned back to her slowly, something hollow in his gaze.

 

“And that same night… she tried to kill me.”

 

The words hung in the air like a cold draft, settling deep into the silence between them. Uzi’s stomach dropped, and she didn’t even realize she was holding her breath until it escaped in a slow exhale. Her hands curled tighter in her lap.

 

But still—she didn’t look away. And N, despite the tremble in his jaw and the flicker of pain in his eyes, didn’t either.

 

Uzi blinked, just once, but didn’t break eye contact. She held herself still, listening. She’d expected a heavy answer—but not this heavy.

 

Yet N didn’t falter as he went on, his voice low, his posture a little more hunched than usual, like the words weighed more than he wanted to admit.

 

“It has never gotten that bad before,” he murmured, “that whole situation though happened around the time my parents stopped being around as much. And it only got worse. My grandma was the one who helped us through most things. She was there… the night Cyn tried—well.”

 

His lips pressed into a thin line before continuing. “She was the one who called for help. Got Cyn taken to the hospital. I didn’t even get to say goodbye to her properly.”

 

Uzi could see it in his eyes—that distant, flickering look that someone gets when they’re remembering something they wish they weren’t.

 

She didn’t interrupt, just stayed silent, her gaze steady, giving him room.

 

N rubbed the back of his neck, pausing before going on. “She started getting worse there. Not in a loud, dramatic way, just… inward. Apparent she was polite, even sweet, to the nurses. To me too, when she came back home. At first I thought maybe things were improving.”

 

He laughed—quiet, dry, and humorless. “But I figured it out eventually. She wasn’t better. She was just turning everything in on herself. I’d find her bruised or with bandaged wrists, or pacing like she couldn’t get out of her own head. She was still angry—just not at me  anymore.”

 

Another pause. His hands fidgeted slightly in his lap, then stilled. “She’s been in and out of places ever since,” he said, the resignation in his voice almost haunting. “Sometimes she comes home, stays a few days, even a week. Then she starts spiraling again, and I call my parents. They send someone. And it just repeats.”

 

Uzi didn’t know what to say. Her thoughts raced for something useful, something meaningful—but everything she came up with felt cheap. Insincere. Platitudes didn’t belong here.

 

She opened her mouth slightly, unsure if she should try to say something anyway—but then, N smiled.

 

Not a fake, hollow smile. Not the polite kind either. It was… quiet. Small. But real.

 

“What about you?” he asked, his tone shifting, lighter but not forced. “You got any siblings?”

Notes:

Whoa

Finally, Cyn has been mentioned 🤧

So basically for her backstory or whatever, obviously the absolute solved doesn’t exist, so I had to brainstorm on what her character might be like in an AU like this

I actually thought this out a while ago but I finally have the chance to include it - AHH I love lore

I thought like, so she has to have issues, right? It only made sense. Ig in theory I *could* have made her completely ‘normal’ or wtv, but like tbh that’d be kinda boring. So I was like, what if she has balance issues and stuff? She kinda does in the show ig, cuz like the actual drone vessel thing of Cyn that the absolute solver was using was damaged, cuz of the humans throwing her out (I think that’s in like the beginning of episode 2, correct me if I’m wrong.) there’s still way more to it than that though.

Anyways my point was that she has balance issues. And I was like, what if she got a concussion? Irl depending on how bad someone’s concussion is it can really fuck you up, so I’m assuming hers was *really* bad. And also irl there have been reported cases of kids getting a concussion from falling and then their personalities changing entirely too (it’s really interesting actually- I’ve heard of that happening in a lot of true crime cases, and the kid that had the concussion began showing serious issues after that. So that’s where I got that idea from. And note that does not happen to every kid who gets a concussion or wtv, but it also makes sense cuz ur brain is still in a crucial stage of development too.)

Oh and obvi they’re robots and not people so it’s def a bit different since they don’t have legit ‘brains,’ so ig a concussion is like, the equivalent of their cpu or wtv the fuck getting somewhat or permanently damaged idk 😭 oh and like diseases are like computer viruses but with extra steps ig LMAO

Back to Cyn, maybe after whatever happened obvi she had to go through physical therapy, but then mentally she started acting differently too. Like, super passive aggressive. I don’t think she’d be downright aggressive, if that makes sense, but she’d be like extremely manipulative emotionally. Also like super angry, but again she doesn’t show emotions like that in the way someone ‘normal’ should. She’d js be like, very devoid of tone and stuff, like the character is in the show. Hopefully that makes sense

**CW again, gonna be talking about SH, skip the next 2 paragraphs if u don’t wanna read this. Not going into detail though obvi, im js talking abt it**

Then after a bunch of incidents she gets sent to mental hospitals and different programs to see if she can get help, but again she’s very manipulative and keeps to herself, so it seems like she’s getting better, right? But then she started internalizing everything since she couldn’t understand why she wasn’t normal. Maybe she started self-harming since she wanted to feel something, since she felt like she can’t feel anything.

She comes home from the first time after being sent away, and she’s won’t stop SHing, so every time N catches her she has to be sent away again, since he can’t constantly watch her, and he’s worried about her going too far or doing something worse.

I feel so bad for N too cuz it’s like, he literally is powerless to do anything about it. And he def blames himself way more than he should - which he shouldn’t at all. All he wants is for Cyn to be okay and to have a normal relationship with her again, but nothing is helping

And the N is like, hella good at hiding his emotions and always wants to be there for everyone, so he feels like he can’t act upset or hopeless even when he is

Overall, my point is N js hides his emotions really well… or more like represses them. But not in the way that Uzi does - you’ll understand what I mean by that in the chapter after the next one cuz they talk abt it. Yeah, they’re still having a conversation 2 chapters from now 😭😭 IT’S IMPORTANT OKAY

I had more to say but I literally ran out of characters so I can’t keep yapping 💔

Maybe that’s for the better LMAO

OKAY ALSO MORE IMPORTANTLY next chapter is gonna be posted tomorrow, and like the day after that will for sure have a chapter too. Chapter updates should be daily again but I’ll tell u other wise if anything happens

Sorry for yapping sm LMAO see yall tomorrow 😭🫶

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 63: Small Talk (continued)

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi blinked, caught off guard by the sudden shift in tone.

 

Her mind was still reeling a bit from everything N had just shared, so when he asked her—almost casually—if she had any siblings, it took a moment for her to recover. Even after everything he’d said, everything he’d shared, he still wanted to know about her.

 

“I—uh… no,” she stammered, eyes widening slightly. She immediately winced inwardly. Great. She cursed herself for stuttering like an awkward idiot. N had just opened up to her about something incredibly personal, and now she was fumbling over a simple answer.

 

Still, she pressed on, determined not to let the awkwardness sink in. Maybe he wanted a lighter topic now. Maybe he needed it. So she forced herself to relax a little and offered a small, self-deprecating smile.

 

“I’ve always kind of wanted siblings, though,” she admitted. “I mean, being an only child has its perks, but it gets… kinda boring.”

 

N was watching her with that usual open expression, his eyes attentive and focused in a way that made her feel like he wasn’t just listening—he cared. He tilted his head slightly.

 

“Boring how?” he asked, genuinely curious.

 

Uzi leaned back a little in the seat and gave a shrug, glancing toward the seat across from them—which, thankfully, was still empty.

 

“Well, like…” she waved a hand vaguely in the air. “When I’m bored and none of my friends are free, I kind of have to figure stuff out by myself. Like, I’ll play video games or whatever, but it’d be nice to have someone there who’s always around, y’know?”

 

Her voice softened slightly, and she glanced sideways at him. “It’s different from just hanging out with friends. Siblings are, like… built-in company. I don’t know.”

 

As she spoke, she found herself relaxing more than she expected. Maybe it was because N wasn’t judging. Maybe it was because, for once, she felt like someone actually saw her—and not just the sharp-edged version she showed to everyone else.


N gave a small nod, his expression thoughtful. “Yeah… I get that,” he said softly.

 

A brief silence settled between them—not uncomfortable, just still. The kind of quiet that lingered when no one felt the need to rush it.

 

But after a beat, N shifted in his seat, glancing sideways at her with an easy smile. “So… speaking of friends,” he began, voice casual but curious, “how’s school been for you this year? I don’t think I’ve actually asked how you’ve been doing—like, really doing. Recently or, y’know, in general.”

 

Uzi blinked, mildly surprised at the question. A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth, a quiet kind of appreciation welling in her chest. He actually cared enough to ask.

 

She her arms folded over her chest in a relaxed way as she continued. “It’s been… great, actually,” she said, a touch of warmth in her tone. “I think I’ve mentioned it before, but… I haven’t really had a proper friend group in a long time. Let alone actual friends at all.”

 

She paused, glancing toward him with a faint, more genuine smile now. “At least, not until I met you. And you dragged me into your weird little friend circle.”

 

N laughed softly at that, his eyes lighting up as his smile widened. There was something proud in the way he looked at her—pleased, like hearing her say that had genuinely made his day.

 

“I’m really glad I could do that for you,” he said. “Give you a chance to… I dunno. Feel like you belong. I know how rough it can be, going without that kind of connection.”

 

He shrugged lightly, resting one elbow on the back of the seat. “Honestly, before I met everyone else, it was just me and V for the most part.”

 

Uzi let out a dry huff of laughter at that, one brow lifting skeptically. “Seriously? Just  V?”

 

N grinned sheepishly, as if aware of how that sounded.

 

“I have no idea how you survived that,” Uzi muttered, only half-joking, her eyes narrowing in mock disbelief. But behind the teasing, there was something warm in her voice. Something grateful. Because somehow, despite all of that, he’d found her —and he’d brought her into something she never thought she’d have.

 

N let out a quiet chuckle, the sound light and amused. “Oh, come on,” he said, a playful lilt in his voice. “V’s not that bad.”

 

Uzi raised an eyebrow, unconvinced. “Sure. If she likes you,” she shot back with a skeptical tone, crossing her arms. “She’s only just started tolerating me, I think.” She huffed,”Before that? She was so short with literally everything I said. It felt like I was talking to a brick wall.”

 

N gave a knowing nod, his smile turning slightly sheepish. “Yeah… I get that. But if you know her a little more personally, she’s nicer. Sometimes. Depends on the day, really.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes with a quiet scoff and shook her head, lips tugging into a reluctant smirk. “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

 

Deciding to steer the conversation elsewhere, Uzi leaned forward a bit. “So, uh… what do you know about the trip, anyway?” she asked, shifting tone. “Honestly, I don’t really know a lot about what we’re doing.”

 

N tilted his head slightly, eyes drifting upward in thought. “Well,” he said slowly, “first stop is the hotel. I looked it up online last night—it actually looks pretty nice. Kinda fancy.”

 

“Cool,” Uzi replied with a nod. “Do you know if we’re getting our own rooms or…?”

 

At that, N shook his head. “Nah. Rooms of four. Assigned roommates.”

 

Uzi froze. Her posture stiffened slightly, her eyes locking onto his with a flicker of dread. “Wait. You’re not serious… right?”

 

N’s smile widened innocently. “Nope. Totally serious.”

 

Uzi stared at him, her core dropping into metaphorical free fall. Her face said it all—mouth slightly agape, eyes a fraction wider than before, disbelief creeping in like static interference. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to groan, scream, or sink through the floor.

 

And meanwhile, N just sat there, blissfully unaware of the internal crisis he’d just triggered, looking all too pleased with himself for delivering that particular piece of information.

 

Uzi blinked, incredulous. “You’ve gotta be joking. Stop messing with me—”

 

There was a flicker of confusion on N’s face. “No?” he said slowly, brows furrowing. “Why would I joke about that?”

 

Her mouth opened, then closed again. Assigned rooms of four?!  No. No way. She had to have misheard him. But N just looked back at her like he didn’t understand why she looked like her world had just collapsed.

 

“…Something wrong?” he asked, tilting his head.

 

Uzi let out a groan, slumping back into her seat and dragging a hand down her face in despair. “Yes, something is wrong! This is terrible !”

 

N blinked, startled. “Terrible?”

 

“Yes!” Uzi said, her voice rising in exasperation. “What if I don’t know anyone  in my room? What if I get stuck with someone who hates me—or worse, someone weird ?” Her voice dropped into a mutter, more to herself than him now. “I was just starting to actually look forward to this stupid trip…”

 

She turned her gaze toward the window again, lips pressed in a tense line. Her internal excitement from earlier had fizzled into anxiety. But then she heard it—a soft, warm laugh from N. She glanced back at him, almost glaring. What was so funny?

 

He met her look with a gentle smile, voice calm. “Uzi,” he said, her name soft in the air between them. “It’s going to be okay.”

 

She didn’t respond, but she didn’t look away either.

 

“Look at it this way,” N went on. “Either you get lucky and end up with friends—or you get a chance to make new ones. You’re cool enough to get along with anyone, honestly.”

 

Uzi frowned, though the sharp edges of it had dulled. “I guess…” she muttered, still unconvinced, but not arguing. “But still.”

 

Still. It was a disaster. But maybe it was one she could survive—barely.

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes slightly, still reeling from the last revelation. “Okay. What else ?” she asked, crossing her arms with exaggerated suspicion. “You got any other horrible news about this trip I should mentally prepare for?”

 

N gave a little shrug, looking entirely too relaxed for her liking. “Nah, everything else sounds pretty standard. You know, school trip stuff.”

 

His tone was casual, but then something seemed to click in his mind. “Oh—actually,” he added, straightening a little, “I heard we’re going to a museum one of the days.”

 

Uzi tilted her head, half-interested. “A museum, huh?”

 

“Yeah,” N said, nodding. “And I also heard something about a free day. Like, one day where we can just do whatever we want.”

 

That perked Uzi up more than she expected. Her posture straightened, and her expression flickered with curiosity. “A free day?”

 

N nodded. “That’s what other drones are saying, at least. Could be just a rumor, but it sounds like it’s real.”

 

Uzi leaned forward slightly. “Okay, but are there, like, limits? Like, what can we do?”

 

N shrugged again, his eyes drifting upward in thought. “Probably nothing too crazy. Just whatever you can afford—and as long as everyone meets back at the hotel by a set time, I think it’s fine.”

 

Uzi nodded slowly, the gears in her head clearly beginning to turn. “Yeah… that makes sense.”

 

And for the first time since the ‘room assignment disaster,’ her tone didn’t sound purely like doom. The idea of getting to do something  fun on her own terms gave her just enough hope to cling to.

 

Uzi glanced sideways at N, her nerves bubbling under her skin. After a few seconds of quiet deliberation, she finally worked up the courage and asked, her voice just barely louder than a murmur, “Hey… on the free day—do you maybe wanna… hang out?” She tried to sound casual, but the flicker of uncertainty in her tone gave her away.

 

N didn’t even blink before answering, his expression brightening almost instantly. “Yeah. I’d love that.”

 

There was no hesitation in his voice. Just warmth. Sincerity.

 

Uzi felt something flutter in her chest. Her gaze dropped for a second before lifting again, and a shy smile tugged at her lips. She didn’t even have to think about it—it just happened. When she glanced up at him, she found N smiling right back, gentle and genuine. For just a fleeting heartbeat, the world around them seemed to vanish. No bus, no classmates, no noise. Just the two of them, caught in a quiet, weightless moment.

 

Then the bus hit something.

 

A loud thud jolted the entire vehicle, and suddenly everyone—including Uzi—was airborne for half a second. Her body lifted off the seat, and she let out a startled gasp, arms instinctively flying forward to grab the seat in front of her.

 

All around them, drones shrieked in surprise—though none of it sounded particularly terrified. More like shocked amusement. As quickly as the bus had launched them, it dropped them back down, the tires thudding back against the road with a rattle that made the windows vibrate.

 

Uzi exhaled sharply, still clutching the back of the seat with both hands. Her eyes were wide, her posture stiff like she was bracing for aftershocks. “What was that?” she muttered under her breath, clearly more annoyed than alarmed.

 

She turned to look at N—and found that he wasn’t any better off. He was hunched forward slightly, hands gripping the edge of the seat beneath him like it might stop him from being yeeted into the ceiling again. His hair was slightly tousled from the jolt, and his expression was one of bewildered disbelief.

 

Then their eyes met.

 

And instantly, the tension broke.

 

Uzi burst out into laughter, and N quickly followed, the two of them caught in a shared moment of ridiculousness that made the shock of it all feel almost funny.

 

Their laughter echoed with the background chatter and groans of other students recovering from the sudden jolt.

 

“That was…” N started, breathless with amusement, “definitely something.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes, though there was no real irritation in it. She crossed her arms and leaned back in her seat with a dramatic sigh. “Tell me about it.”

 

Still smiling, still a little breathless, she let the laughter taper off—but the warmth between them lingered, maybe even a little stronger than before.

Notes:

I posted this chapter a lot easier than my usual time

Hopefully soon I can start doing that more soon, since like I’m abt to have a lot more free time

This chapter is a lot lighter than the previous one, obviously- I thought it’d js be nice if the two of them have a semi-deep conversation

I mean, they’re literally sitting next to each other for 2 and a half hours

Is it js me or like, when ur in a car or som with someone for a long time u always have the deepest conversations? Might js be me but it’s actually so great, I loving have deep conversations with people

Anyways more abt the actual story, so I’ve been able to write ahead a lot more since I’ve had more free time, and like I thought it’d only be like 2 chapters of them on the bus, right? Well 2 turned into like 4 somehow 😭 (including this one and the last one ig)

Maybe 5 but I’m still working on it 💔

I think it’s important though cuz of like, dialogue and like… other things

LMAO ANYWAYS AGAIN so the next chapter will be posted tomorrow for sure, super excited

OH AND ALSO I HAVE LIKE NEWS SUPER IMPORTANT I’m probably gonna make a discord server soon so if anyone’s interested in joining you’re more than welcome to. Haven’t made it yet but I’m working on it

Someone suggested it to me and I thought it was a great idea. It’d be a server not *solely* abt this fic or like MD and stuff, but js like fics in general ig.

But like since I’d be the one making it obvi it’s gonna be a lot abt my fics and stuff, if that makes sense. Like I’ll have an announcement channel (chat? I forgot what they’re called 😭) for chapters being posted and stuff idk. But then for other people writing fics u can promote yourself, and js generally it’ll be a place everyone can talk abt ur shared interest and wtv. (Oh and also since im currently writing a MD fic ig there will js by default be a lot of MD content and stuff- not a bad thing in any way though, that’ll be great)

Hopefully all of that makes sense 😭🤚 it’ll be more clear once I sort out all the details.

What do yall think abt that? I’d love to hear ideas anyone has or any suggestions too!

That’s all I have to say for now. Again, next chapter will be posted tomorrow!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 64: Jolt

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The next hour drifted by with a quiet sort of ease. Uzi and N remained in their shared little bubble near the back of the bus, chatting idly while the landscape rolled past the window beside them. Their conversation meandered from one topic to the next—shared interests, odd memories involving their friends, dumb things they’d done as kids, random hypotheticals that sparked small debates and laughter. It was comfortable in a way Uzi wasn’t used to. With N, there was never any pressure to keep the conversation going; it just flowed .

 

There were pauses, of course—natural ones—but even those didn’t feel awkward. They were filled with glances out the window, soft smiles, or just the hum of the road beneath the wheels.

 

At one point, N had even mimicked the voice of one of their teachers during a rant about homework, which had made Uzi snort so hard she nearly choked on air. It was easy to forget they were on a crowded school bus. It almost felt like it was just the two of them.

 

Eventually, Uzi pulled out her phone to check the time. The screen lit up:

 

8:36 AM.

 

She blinked and looked over at N. “How much longer do you think we’ve got?”

 

N tilted his head, thoughtful. “Well… we left around 7:30, right?” He did a quick mental calculation, tapping a finger against his chin. “Probably a little before or after ten. Depends on how traffic goes.”

 

Uzi nodded slowly in response, then raised a hand to cover a wide, unrestrained yawn.

 

N noticed immediately. His expression softened, amused. “Tired?”

 

“Yeah,” Uzi mumbled, bringing her hand to her face hand and rubbing at one of her eyes with a knuckle.

 

“Couldn’t sleep?” he asked, shifting slightly in his seat to face her more.

 

“Kind of,” she admitted, exhaling through her nose. Her voice was quieter now, her gaze unfocused as she looked ahead. “Not for any particular reason. Just… I always have trouble sleeping. It’s not really a new thing.”

 

N tilted his head again, a crooked little grin forming on his face. “You sure you weren’t just up all night playing video games again?”

 

Uzi scoffed and gave him a look, though there was a glint of amusement behind her tired eyes. “I wish . Would’ve been a better reason than staring at the ceiling until two in the morning.”

 

She rested her cheek on her hand, elbow propped against the window ledge. She wasn’t entirely sure why she felt comfortable admitting that, but she did.

 

N's expression shifted, losing a bit of its usual brightness as he tilted his head gently toward her. “Why do you think that is?” he asked, his voice soft, lacking even a trace of judgment—just honest curiosity and slight concern.

 

Uzi blinked at him, caught a little off guard by the question. Her first instinct was to brush it off, say something sarcastic or vague, but for some reason, she didn’t want to do that right now. Not with him. She let herself lean back against the seat, eyes flicking toward the window as she thought it over.

 

“I don’t know,” she admitted at last, her tone quieter now, more reflective. “I guess… I just think too much.”

 

It wasn’t a rehearsed answer—it wasn’t even something she’d ever really said out loud before. But it felt true. That constant buzzing in her head, the never-ending stream of thoughts that always seemed louder when everything else was quiet… it made sense.

 

She glanced over at N just in time to see him nod with an understanding look in his eyes. He didn’t look surprised. “Yeah,” he said, resting his elbow on the seat’s edge and leaning slightly toward her. “I get that. I’ve got a big overthinking problem too.”

 

That made Uzi pause.

 

She stared at him, squinting slightly. “Wait… you ? Really?”

 

N laughed slightly at her reaction, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “What, is that so hard to believe?”

 

“I mean, kinda?” she replied, brow raised. “You just always seem so— I don’t know. Confident. Like, in everything. Like nothing ever gets to you.”

 

Her voice trailed off near the end, a hint of disbelief still lingering. But N only smiled, a small, sheepish grin that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Honestly?” he said, voice light but honest, “I don’t think before I speak. Like, at all. Most of the time I just say stuff and then, hours later, I’ll be lying in bed thinking, ‘Why did I say it like that ?’”

 

He let out a short laugh at himself and shook his head. “So yeah. Overthinking? Huge problem.”

 

Uzi blinked, surprised again, but then—slowly—she smiled.

 

It wasn’t just amusement. It was something deeper, a quiet sense of connection. Maybe she wasn’t as weird or broken as she always felt. Maybe even someone like N—bright, easygoing, and confident—had his own mental spirals.

 

That… actually made her feel a little better.

 

Uzi exhaled sharply through her nose, a faint smirk tugging at one corner of her mouth. “I’m like… the opposite. But also not.” She shifted in her seat, resting an elbow against the window’s edge as she glanced sidelong at N. “I think way too much— before and after  I say stuff. Doesn’t even have to be important. I’ll say something totally normal and then spend the next hour wondering if I sounded weird.”

 

N didn’t respond right away, but he didn’t need to. The look on his face—the small, knowing nod and softened gaze—said he understood. There was a silence between them, not awkward or tense, just... comfortable. A kind of mutual understanding that didn’t need to be spelled out. They were different, but somehow cut from the same cloth.

 

After a beat, N’s eyes flicked away for a moment in thought. Then he looked back at her and spoke up gently. “You could take a nap, y’know.”

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard. “Huh?”

 

He smiled, almost sheepishly, like he was offering something simple but meaningful. “I mean, if you’re tired,” he clarified, gesturing loosely. “You should get some sleep while you can. Unpacking’s gonna suck if you’re running on 5 hours of sleep.”

 

That… actually made sense. Uzi gave a small nod, brows raised in reluctant agreement. “You’re not wrong,” she admitted.

 

Besides, she thought, long rides like this always made her drowsy in the best way—cozy, rocked gently by the motion of the road. Honestly, it was sometimes the only kind of rest that didn’t leave her feeling more tired afterward.

 

“Alright, yeah,” she murmured, reaching into her hoodie pocket and pulling out her tangled web of white wire headphones. She spent a moment undoing the knots with a low grumble of frustration, finally plugging them into her phone and slipping the buds into her ears. A thumb press started her playlist—set to shuffle—and soft music began to fill her head, dulling the outside world.

 

She didn’t say anything else. Just leaned her head against the window, the cool glass a welcome contrast to the warmth of the bus. Her eyes stayed open a moment longer, watching the blur of the outside world roll by, then slowly closed.

 

She hoped sleep would come easy. For now, at least, she felt safe.

 

-

 

Uzi jolted awake with a sharp inhale, her body tense and shoulders pulled tight. Her eyes widened immediately, like she’d just surfaced from deep water. Her heart was racing, thudding against her chest like it was trying to escape, and her head ached—heavy and foggy, as if her thoughts hadn’t fully made the trip back with her.

 

For a split second, she didn’t know where she was.

 

Then, it clicked—the dull hum of the road, the quiet murmur of drones chatting across the aisle, the faint rattle of the bus under them. She was still on the trip. Still in her seat. Her eyes flicked to the side.


N was there.

 

He had his phone loosely gripped in one hand, but it was resting idle in his lap now. He wasn’t looking at the screen. He was looking at her—eyebrows creased, mouth set in a soft, concerned line.

 

The moment their eyes met, he leaned in slightly, his voice low and careful. “Hey,” he said gently, “you okay?”

 

Uzi blinked, still shaking the weight of sleep from her vision. Her processors felt scrambled, and her memory of exactly what happened in her dream was already slipping through her fingers like water through a crack.

 

Something about it still clung to her—something tense, something that made her chest feel tight. She’d had this dream before… but she couldn’t quite hold onto the details.

 

She rubbed at her eyes, trying to steady her breathing. Her hands felt clammy. “Yeah,” she said quietly, though the word felt automatic. Unconvincing.

 

She paused. Then looked at N again—really looked—and the concern hadn’t faded.

 

“I… I don’t know,” she added, barely above a whisper, her voice rough around the edges. “I think I had a bad dream.”

 

She wasn’t entirely sure why that felt hard to admit. Maybe it was because she wasn’t used to anyone asking in the first place. Or maybe it was because N was still watching her like he actually cared about the answer.

 

N looked like he had something to say, his mouth parting slightly—then faltering, the words catching on the edge of his tongue. His brows dipped, and he let out a short breath, clearly unsure of what the right thing to say even was .

 

Uzi watched him flounder for a second, then sighed and leaned back into her seat with a faint shake of her head. “It’s fine,” she muttered, trying to smooth the tension in her voice. “Happens a lot, so I’m used to it.”

 

That only made N’s expression shift further, his concern deepening like a hairline crack spreading. “Really?” he asked softly, brows tugging upward. “I—ah, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have suggested you sleep, that’s on me.” He let out a quiet, self-deprecating laugh, lifting a hand and scratching at the side of his head like he was trying to shake off the awkwardness.

 

Uzi turned to glance at him, then rolled her eyes faintly—not out of annoyance, but more at how him that reaction was.

 

“Don’t apologize,” she said with a small shrug, tone dry but not unkind. “It’s not like you manifested the nightmare or something.” Her lips curled into the faintest hint of a smirk at her own sarcasm.

 

N chuckled under his breath, though it still carried the note of hesitation. He shifted slightly in his seat, one hand now gripping the edge as he leaned forward a bit, more relaxed but still watching her carefully.

 

Uzi didn’t want the moment to get too heavy again.

 

She took a breath and kept the words moving.

 

“I kind of remember it now…” she paused briefly before continuing,”It’s always the same dream,” she said, her voice quieter now. “Or close enough. I’m running from something… I don’t know what. I’m completely alone. And right when it feels like it’s gonna catch me, I fall off this cliff.”

 

Her gaze dropped to the floor for a second, like the weight of the words lingered on her shoulders even though she tried to play them off.

 

N furrowed his brow slightly, absorbing her words with more seriousness than she expected. “Do you think it means something?” he asked, curious, not pushing—just gently wondering.

 

Uzi gave a halfhearted shrug. “Probably,” she murmured. “But honestly? I’m not about to start psychoanalyzing myself on a school bus.”

 

She leaned her head against the window again, letting her eyes drift to the blur of trees outside. Her expression was unreadable—half tired, half trying to push her thoughts somewhere else. Not gone, but shelved.

 

Another yawn escaped her before she could stop it, and Uzi blinked hard, her vision blurring slightly at the edges. She was still tired— really  tired. The kind of tired that clung to her like static, heavy and stubborn.

 

But even worse than that was the lingering echo of the dream—the isolation of it. The way it made her chest feel tight. The way it made her feel alone,  like no one else in the world existed.

 

She swallowed and exhaled through her nose, trying to shake the unease off her shoulders.

 

But it lingered.

 

Somewhere in the back of her mind, a quiet thought surfaced.

 

I wish someone could just… be there.

 

Her eyes drifted sideways almost instinctively. N sat beside her, still watching her with that thoughtful concern etched across his face. His fingers were loosely curled around his phone now, resting in his lap, but his attention had never wavered. He looked… calm. Steady.

 

A thought popped up into her head before she could stop it.

 

No,  she told herself quickly. No way. That was a weird  idea. That would be weird. She’d be weird. She barely had the nerve to make eye contact with him half the time—let alone ask for something like that .

 

But another part of her reminded her— he  wouldn’t think it was weird. He told her just the other day that she didn’t even need to ask to hug him.

 

Uzi’s face grew warm at the memory, a slow burn rising from the base of her neck up to her cheeks.

 

The words echoed like a whisper she hadn’t been able to forget.

 

She looked away, biting her lip. But despite herself, her eyes found their way back to him.

 

N was still watching her, his expression open and gentle—just… waiting. And seeing that, it gave her the smallest flicker of courage. Her voice faltered slightly at first, but she pushed through it.

 

“Um… can I—” she paused, hating how her voice cracked. “Could I… rest my head on your shoulder?”

 

N blinked, looking briefly surprised. But then something in his eyes softened, and the confusion melted away as easily as a cloud parting in the sun.

 

“Yeah,” he said, his voice light, unbothered. “Of course.”

 

Even though Uzi already knew he would say yes, it still caught her off guard.

 

Why the hell was he so casual about that?

 

Uzi didn’t even try to stop the thought—it hit her like a slap. She stared straight ahead, blinking slowly, her head still full of static as her heart tried to catch up with her brain. N hadn’t even hesitated. Not a single second of awkwardness. Just that same light, easygoing tone and that familiar, peaceful smile like she hadn’t just asked something personal , something that had taken every ounce of nerve she could muster.

 

She bit the inside of her cheek. Of course he was like this. He was always  like this. That was just… who he was. Friendly. Kind. Unshakably warm in a way she still couldn’t quite understand.

 

But still .

 

How could anyone be so calm—so nonchalant —about something like that? Probably because it wasn’t that deep. He probably didn’t even have a second thought when she asked him to just rest her head on his shoulder.

 

Realizing this made her feel like she was the only one overthinking everything. Which, honestly, she probably was.

 

It’s not a big deal, she told herself bitterly. You’re the one making it a big deal. Just shut up and relax.

 

But her thoughts were like a swarm of static that wouldn’t leave her alone.

 

Uzi let out a breath and tried to push the spiral down, forcing herself to focus on something real . N hadn’t moved—still sitting beside her, calm and content, the corners of his mouth gently curved in that same, serene little smile that made something twist in her chest.

 

It was stupid. He was stupid. Or maybe just weird. Or maybe she was the weird one for feeling so thrown off by something so small. By something that she literally asked. He didn’t have to say yes, but he did.

 

And the worst part was, she didn’t even dislike how okay with this he was. If anything, she felt relieved.

 

She shifted slightly, scooting just a bit closer until her leg brushed against his. He didn’t flinch or even react. That simple lack of tension somehow made everything worse and better at the same time.

 

Uzi pulled out her phone again and plugged in her headphones, wrapping the cord around her fingers out of habit as she untangled it.

 

She suppressed a yawn as she rested her head on his shoulder—tentative at first, as if she expected him to pull away. He didn’t.

 

And despite the noise in her head, despite the lingering fog of the nightmare, despite everything … she felt herself start to relax.

 

The music hummed softly in her ears. His presence beside her was steady and quiet, not asking for anything, not making it weird, just… being there.

 

Maybe that was why she liked him. He was different. And even if she had trouble admitting it… that didn’t stop it from being true.

 

The rhythm of the bus, the low hum of her music, and the quiet warmth against her side all worked together to cradle Uzi toward sleep. She could feel it coming on fast this time—no racing thoughts, no lingering fear from her nightmare—just a slow descent into stillness.

 

Everything around her seemed to blur and fade, like the edges of a dream softening before it even began.

 

But just as she was on the cusp of slipping under, she felt something.

 

A touch—gentle and slow—curling around her fingers. Her heart gave a tiny jolt, though she didn’t open her eyes. She didn’t need to.

 

Of course it was N.

 

She stayed still, breathing soft and steady, but her chest felt warm in a way that made it hard to stay fully detached from her own emotions. His hand was warm, and it seemed like he was being careful, as if he was testing whether it was okay. Like he was trying not to wake her, not to disturb whatever fragile peace she’d found.

 

But she felt  it. She felt all of it.

 

And robo-god, she liked  it.

 

A quiet smile crept across her lips—sleepy, content, and so very real. He hadn’t said anything. He didn’t need to. Just the fact that he’d reached out like that… it said more than words ever could.

 

Uzi shifted just barely, pressing in a little closer, letting her body rest more fully against his.

 

Then, she felt  his head gently lean against hers, like he was anchoring both of them in this quiet space they’d created. She gave his hand a slow, careful squeeze, almost unsure if it was too much, too obvious.

 

But N responded immediately—returning the squeeze just once, then slowly tracing his thumb back and forth over her knuckles. The motion was rhythmic, soothing. It made her chest tighten and soften at the same time.

 

Everything else slipped away.

 

No thoughts. No dreams. Just the steady beat of the road beneath them, the warmth of N beside her, and the soft rhythm of his touch as she let herself be pulled into sleep—this time, a peaceful, dreamless one.

Notes:

Girl.

GIRL.

Bro I’m actually so done with Uzi she needs to MAKE UP HER MIND LIKE WHAT

when she’s thinking about it, she doesn’t wanna smile in front of him, but when she’s not thinking about it, she just doesn’t have a second thought

And then like she’s overthinking every little thing he says or does, or overthinking what *he’d* think about something she’d say, but then he literally does not gaf abt anything and is js like,, casual ig

IT’S NOT THAT DEEP UZI, UR GONNA BE OKAY 😭😭

(I’m saying all of this as if I’m not the one literally writing it LMAO)

I think it’s so silly how N said he has an overthinking problem

Idk if he could even comprehend how bad it is for Uzi 😭🤚 or like, I mean, he probably can, but if that were him he’d def be a lot quieter and less social… like Uzi LMAO

Honestly though like, off topic but not off topic *technically*, for me personally I’m a big over thinker. I’m like, fine now though. Yeah, I still overthink things, but whenever I’m talking to someone I don’t over analyze every single little thing they say or do. I used to be like that when I was younger and it was exhausting, but ig I grew out of it or like learned how to manage it better (kind of - old habits die hard LMAO) but I js don’t really get stressed abt it anymore. I feel like I’m outgoing *enough* especially when I’m around friends, but like if I don’t know someone there’s no way I’m js gonna go up and talk to them unless I have to. If they talk to me that’s fine though idrc but like, no way I’m so bad at talking to new people (but only if I talk to them first) 💔 LIKE OMG I’ve gotten way better at it but like, for example, when I wanna compliment someone, I start overthinking it and get scared, but then I gotta remind myself “what’s the worst that could happen? They don’t say thank you?” LIKE LMFAO I’m so dramatic. I’ve learned that js going for it without thinking too much, or just being logical, is like the best thing, in generally any context (when it comes to talking to people.) Cuz like, also on the overthinking part, absolutely *no one* is so focused on me that they’re gonna analyze and pick apart every single little thing I say. If anything, they’re worried that I might be silently judging them, when in reality I’m scared that they might be judging me. Does that make sense? Like generally everyone’s worried abt themselves and IT’S GONNA BE OKAY like I’m js a little baby sometimes 🥲

But then again now that I think abt it, when it comes to friends it’s way different than someone I’m romantically interested in. OMG IT’S SO BAD like, if my friend says som or I say something to them I literally don’t gaf im gonna say wtv and I joke around a lot so it’s fine. But then when I like someone like that, I’m worried that I might say something and mess things up UGHH I hate it. And ik that person probably isn’t really thinking anything abt wtv I say BUT WHAT IF THEY AREEE-

Enough talking abt me though- my point was I might be projecting js a *tad* bit, but the difference between me and Uzi is that I’m literally fine and I don’t gaf what people think for the most part, and like I don’t really stress abt it. But Uzi, on the other hand, tries acting like she doesn’t gaf but then she actually does and picks apart and overthinks every little thing, and it’s like a really serious problem for her and she stresses herself out constantly 😭🙏

This girl js needs someone to talk to like UGH girl stop bottling your emotions. Way easier said than done though cuz like, even if someone were to tell her that, depending on who it was either she’d consider it or she’d think whoever told her to open up is mad at her and then she’d stress abt it… but then act like she’s not stressing about it and she could care less 💀

Anyways enough rambling cuz like I got way sidetracked for a minute 😭🤚

No chapter tomorrow 😢 there’s not gonna be any crazy delays or anything I js need a day to write more. For sure though there’ will be a chapter on Friday and Saturday that will be posted

OH AND ALSO um so… it’s js 1 1/2 (or more like js 1) chapters more of them being on this bus (I think) and then they’ll finally be off of it. STUFF HAPPENS OKAY sorry that they’ve been on a bus for like 4 chapters but the dialogue is important as well as other things 😭💔

Ok that’s all I have to say. See yall Friday! BYE

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

-

EDIT: (5/9/25) Hey so I can’t post today since I’m super busy, I really underestimated the amount of time I’d have 😭💔 - so 2 chapters will be posted tomorrow instead to make up for it, hopefully

Chapter 65: Caught

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi stirred slowly, blinking against the soft, grayish light filtering in through the bus windows. This time, she didn’t wake up in a panic—no lurching heartbeat, no nightmare clinging to her mind. Just a quiet, almost unfamiliar calm.

 

Her head was still resting against N’s shoulder, warm and steady beneath her, but her hand wasn’t in his anymore. It must’ve slipped away while she slept. Carefully, she shifted, lifting her head from him, but didn’t move far. Something about the closeness still felt comforting.

 

She glanced at him.

 

N was awake, scrolling lazily through his phone with one hand, eyes relaxed and face calm. The corners of his mouth turned up when he noticed her movement, and he looked over at her with a smile that was all warmth and no pressure.

 

“Hey,” he said softly, voice still a little raspy from the early hour. “You’re awake. Sleep okay?”

 

Uzi gave a small nod, stifling a yawn with the back of her hand. Her eyelids were still heavy, but the kind of heavy that felt earned, like her body had finally allowed itself to rest.

 

After a beat, she murmured, “What time is it? Are we almost there?”

 

N glanced back at his screen and tapped it lightly. “It’s 9:16,” he said, flicking his eyes back up to her.

 

Uzi groaned, flopping her head against the back of the seat with dramatic flair. “Seriously? There’s still almost an hour left?”

 

That earned a soft laugh from him—genuine and amused.

 

She narrowed her eyes at him. “What’s so funny?”

 

N grinned, tilting his head slightly. “You’re just kind of contradicting yourself. Weren’t you the one who said you liked bus long rides?”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes, folding her arms across her chest with a huff. “Yeah, yeah, whatever.”

 

Then she glanced sideways at him, a smirk tugging at the corner of her mouth. “I do like long rides. I just want to get to New Ore City already. That has nothing to do with the bus ride itself.”

 

N chuckled again, shaking his head slightly, but didn’t argue. Uzi leaned back in her seat, lips still curved upward as the sleepiness faded. A part of her kind of hated how easy it was to smile around him—and how hard it was to stop.

 

The quiet hum of the bus filled the silence between them. Uzi turned her head to glance at N again. He hadn’t said anything in a while—not in a distant or dismissive way, just… content. Still scrolling lazily through his phone, one knee bouncing slightly.

 

She didn’t know what to say. She wanted to keep talking to him, but her mind came up blank. And now that the peaceful haze of sleep had worn off, boredom was creeping in again, curling restlessly in her chest.

 

Without really thinking—without any thinking, honestly—Uzi leaned over and rested her head back on his shoulder.

 

The reaction was immediate. She felt him tense ever so slightly beneath her—just for a second—before he relaxed again, and he kept scrolling like nothing had happened.

 

But Uzi’s heart plummeted. What had she just done?

 

Panic fluttered in her throat. She couldn’t just sit back up now, that’d make it even weirder. Would that come off as regret? Did it look like she was trying to be flirtatious? She wasn’t—well, maybe not intentionally.

 

She didn’t even know anymore.

 

Think of something. Say something.

 

Anything.

 

Trying to sound as casual as possible, she asked, “What are you watching?” Her voice came out slightly too high, the edge barely noticeable—but she caught it, and she knew he probably did too.

 

N paused mid-scroll. “Oh, uh—” He stammered slightly. “Just… random dog videos.”

 

Uzi blinked. That answer shouldn’t have made her smile. But it did.

 

There was something off in his voice—something she couldn’t quite name. He wasn’t uneasy, exactly. But he didn’t sound normal, either. Like maybe he was caught off guard now at how casual she was suddenly being. Like he hadn’t expected her to do that. Like he was… flustered?

 

No way.

 

Or—maybe? She couldn’t tell. And that not-knowing, that doubt, crept up fast. Maybe he was just being polite. Maybe he didn’t want to say anything because he didn’t want to hurt her feelings. Maybe she was being too much, too close, too—

 

No. Stop it. He doesn’t look uncomfortable.

 

Still, the thought stuck to her like tar. Even though she knew he wouldn’t be weird about something like this. Even though his shoulder felt warm and steady beneath her and he hadn’t pulled away.

 

But doubt didn’t care about logic. Not when it came to this.

 

Uzi stared straight ahead, expression neutral, but inside, her thoughts were racing like a storm behind glass.

 

Uzi stayed still.

 

Minutes ticked by, but she didn’t move.

 

Her head remained on N’s shoulder, her eyes watching idly as his thumb swiped up and down his screen, flipping through endless dog videos—little bursts of barking, tail wagging, chaos, and static laughter.

 

Her eyes drooped, not out of tiredness, but from the sheer weight of stillness. Her mind wasn't quiet, though—far from it. The tension clung to her like static. Thick and invisible and constant. And the longer N stayed silent, the more it built—like pressure behind her eyes.

 

But he hadn’t moved. Not even once.

 

In fact, if anything, he’d shifted closer at some point. Just slightly. Barely enough to notice. But enough that his side pressed gently against hers, closing that tiny sliver of space that had lingered between them. A silent offering of comfort.

 

He clearly wasn’t uncomfortable.

 

So why was she?

 

Uzi forced her racing thoughts to quiet. Please, just shut up for one second. She didn’t want to spiral again. She didn’t want to wonder what this meant or if she was being weird or if she should pull away. She was exhausted— not tired, just drained. Her brain wouldn’t stop chewing on itself, and the silence felt like a scream.

 

Still, she couldn’t move. Not without making it worse.

 

A slow, frustrated breath stayed trapped behind her ribs. She closed her eyes again, holding them shut in a long, deliberate blink. Her whole body felt like it was vibrating—not visibly, but internally, with a twitchy kind of restlessness that had nowhere to go.

 

Then— ow. 

 

She bit the inside of her cheek. Hard.

 

The sharp pain startled her for half a second, but she didn’t wince. She hadn’t meant to bite herself that hard. She just… needed something. Anything to ground her, even if it was dumb. Even if it didn’t make sense. Just to feel something real and not bottled up.

 

Her jaw loosened.

 

Still, she couldn’t shake the coiled tension in her limbs. Her shoulders were too stiff, her back slightly arched like she was still bracing for something to go wrong.

 

So she forced herself to move—not away, but forward.

 

Uzi turned just slightly and pressed her face into the soft fabric of N’s hoodie, letting the faint warmth of him wash over her. She placed her chin on his shoulder, burrowing her face into it by the crook of his neck. She let her forehead rest more fully against him, refusing to let herself back out.

 

N shifted ever so slightly beneath her—just a subtle realignment of posture, the kind that wouldn’t have registered if Uzi hadn’t been so aware of everything right now.

 

His voice followed a moment later, low and tentative. “Hey… are you okay?” It was soft, laced with concern, like he was trying not to push but couldn’t help asking.

 

Uzi froze.

 

Damn it.

 

Of course he noticed. Duh. How could he not? She’d all but shoved her face into his shoulder like she was trying to escape reality through osmosis. She clenched her jaw as a wave of heat surged up her neck.

 

The mortification she felt burned like it had teeth. She mumbled quickly, “Yeah. I’m fine.”

 

Too fast.

 

Too dismissive.

 

She didn’t want to talk. Talking would mean explaining, and explaining meant unraveling all the tangled, ugly knots in her brain that she didn’t even know how to describe. She just needed a minute to get her bearings. To not spiral.

 

But her heart thudded hard when N went quiet.

 

Uzi stared ahead, teeth pressing into the inside of her cheek again. What if he was silently judging her? Or worse, what if he thought she was being weird? Too clingy? Too intense? Should she move away? But no—then he’d think she regretted leaning on him. What if he wanted her to move but didn’t want to say anything?

 

Her thoughts collided violently, tripping over each other in a fast-paced mess until—

 

“I mean… if something is bothering you,” N said slowly, “you can tell me. You know that, right?” His voice was softer this time, careful. Honest.

 

Uzi’s fingers curled slightly in her lap. She didn’t lift her head. She just shook it the smallest bit, blurting out a quiet, “It’s nothing.”

 

But she knew how that sounded. And so did he, probably.

 

A pause.

 

“Are you sur—”

 

Uzi didn’t even give herself time to think—she just shushed him.

 

A quick, breathy “shhh.”

 

The sound escaped before she could stop it. She didn’t lift her head. Didn’t meet his gaze. Her face burned with immediate regret.

 

Why did I do that?!

 

The realization hit her like a jolt. Her stomach twisted itself into a knot so tight it felt like it might strangle her from the inside out. Why was she like this? Why did every response have to be a mess of impulse and miscommunication? She wasn’t trying to be rude.

 

She just… needed quiet. Needed stillness. She needed to breathe.

 

But of course she couldn’t just say that. No, instead she shushed him. Like he was being annoying. Like she couldn’t stand to hear his voice.

 

Uzi winced inwardly.

 

The memory crept back without her permission—this was just like what happened back in her room, after the party… when she told him to shut up. She’d been curled up beside him on her bed, overwhelmed and fraying at the edges. But back then it had made a little more sense. And even if she had been panicked and stressed for a moment, it was easier to calm down. It was quiet—he was comforting her— and that felt safe.

 

But this?

 

This was not her room.

 

This was a cramped bus seat, filled with the low hum of tires on pavement and the faint noise not just random passengers, but literal classmates chatting loudly or laughing. This was public. This was vulnerable. And her head was tucked way too close to the side of his neck.

 

She wasn’t even resting on his shoulder anymore—she was practically curled into the hollow of him, her breath brushing against his collar.

 

And she had shushed him…

 

Uzi’s face went from warm to scorching.

 

Then, not even a moment later, she felt it—N tensing beneath her. Subtle, but unmistakable.

 

Her heart dropped.

 

Oh no.

 

Was this it? The moment she crossed the line? Made him uncomfortable? She wanted to shrink into herself, dissolve into the seams of the bus seat and disappear entirely.

 

But then… something clicked. A second passed. Then another.

 

He didn’t shift away.

 

In fact, he didn’t move at all.

 

He had gone completely still—so still it made Uzi painfully aware of exactly how close she was. Her cheek was practically brushing the side of his neck, and in the silence after her impulsive hush, she realized…

 

He definitely felt that.

 

Her breath. The closeness. Everything.

 

And that tension she felt? It wasn’t recoiling.

 

It was restraint.

 

N was frozen not because he was uncomfortable—but because he didn’t know what to do with what he was feeling.

 

Uzi’s eyes fluttered closed for a second, her mind a storm of panic and confusion and flustered heat. Her body still screamed embarrassment, but deep beneath the embarrassment, something else had begun to stir. A kind of nervous wonder. A whispering curiosity.

 

And yet… all she could really do was stay still and hope she hadn’t just made everything a thousand times worse.

 

The stillness stretched long between them, brittle and uncertain, as though either of them moved too quickly, the entire moment might crack and collapse. Uzi didn’t dare shift. Her thoughts were spiraling, tripping over each other in a frantic scramble to escape the mess she’d made.

 

What do I do?


Should I move? Apologize? Laugh it off?
Say something—anything?

 

But nothing came. Her throat felt tight, her circuits jittering. Her face still flushed with heat she couldn’t will away. Every possible exit from this awkward silence felt worse than the last.

 

And then—just when she was about to suffocate under her own panic—she felt it.

 

For whatever reason…N’s hand, slowly and carefully, slid into hers.

 

Her eyes flicked down, almost reflexively, catching the sight of his fingers curling around hers. Though, he remained perfectly still, other than his hand.

 

What…?

 

Uzi swallowed, her chest suddenly tight for a whole different reason.

 

Almost without thinking—almost like breathing—she gently laced her fingers through his in return.

 

The tension didn’t vanish completely. It still curled in her gut like coiled wire. But it eased. Just a little.

 

She didn’t dare move her head, still nestled in the warm crook of his neck, but her eyes flicked forward again. His scent was subtle—warm, familiar… like cedarwood. She didn’t even realize how intently she was focused on him until—

 

A small, nearly imperceptible squeeze.

 

His fingers tightened just slightly around hers. Not in urgency. Not in discomfort. But something quiet. Reassuring.

 

As if to say: I’m here. You’re okay. We’re okay.

 

Uzi blinked slowly, her eyes softening. Maybe he didn’t think she was being weird. Maybe all the frantic noise in her head was just that—noise. Maybe… she wasn’t ruining this. Maybe he understood.

 

Maybe he didn’t care that she was messy and confused and sometimes a little bit much.

 

In that fragile, flickering moment, Uzi exhaled.

 

A quiet, fluttery sigh—barely audible—but not to N.

 

Because the second her breath brushed against the side of his neck, he shivered.

 

Subtle, but she noticed.

 

The slight flinch of his posture, the tiniest jolt beneath her cheek. It wasn’t rejection. Not even close. He didn’t move away. Didn’t let go.

 

If anything, he stilled again—like he was bracing himself against something far softer than fear.

 

Uzi’s heart was pounding now, not from anxiety, but from something more electric. Unspoken. Close. And real.

 

Too real.

 

She closed her eyes, suddenly unsure whether she wanted time to slow down—or speed up.

 

After a mere moment of debate, Uzi shifted forward—just barely, but just enough for her face to inch closer, lips hovering over the curve of N’s neck. Her breath ghosted across his skin, and for a moment, she simply stayed there, still as a shadow, caught between hesitation and the fierce ache to act.

 

Then, almost on impulse, she tilted forward that last inch and pressed a soft, brief kiss to the side of his neck.

 

She felt him tense immediately. Not in rejection—but in surprise. A full-body stillness overtook him, like he’d been struck with static. His fingers twitched faintly against hers, like he didn’t know what to do with the sudden jolt of contact.

 

Uzi felt something bloom in her chest—a rush of warmth and adrenaline that bordered on giddy disbelief.

 

She wasn’t thinking anymore. Not doubting. Not overanalyzing. Just… going with whatever this was.

 

Her mouth curled into the barest hint of a smile, and she did it again—another light kiss, placed gently against the same spot.

 

This time, though, there was no reaction. Nothing. N stayed utterly still. No flinch, no breath, no shift.

 

And that sudden absence—his refusal to respond—made the warmth in her chest falter.

 

Why wasn’t he reacting? Was he holding back? Trying not to respond?

 

Did he not like it?

 

That thought stung sharper than she expected. But it was fleeting, replaced by something more stubborn. If he was holding back, she didn’t want him to. She wanted him to feel something. To let it show.

 

So, her lips moved again—this time placing a few slower kisses, trailing them down slightly, just beneath the edge of his jaw and toward the collar of his shirt. Her movements were measured, but deliberate.

 

She noticed him inhale—sharply—but still, he didn’t move. It was like he was frozen in place, bracing against her touch as if afraid to react at all.

 

And that? That only pushed her further.

 

She didn’t even pause this time.

 

Without thinking, without warning, she opened her mouth and bit him—lightly, just once. Enough for him to feel it. Enough to make it unmistakable.

 

The reaction was immediate.

 

N sucked in a breath like he’d just been shocked, and his entire frame shivered against her. His fingers spasmed in hers, curling tightly as if instinct had finally kicked in. And then, he leaned closer—barely, subtly, but undeniably seeking her in return.

 

Uzi smirked.

 

There it was.

 

That was the response she wanted. That was real .

 

She didn’t need words. She didn’t even need to see his face. The way his breath hitched, the way he gripped her hand just a little tighter, told her everything she needed to know.

 

He wasn’t unaffected.

 

Far from it.

 

And for the first time in what felt like forever… Uzi felt like she was the one in control.

 

She didn’t stop. She continued, moving  slowly, methodically, letting her lips map the curve of his neck with growing intent. Each kiss she left behind was firmer than the last—nothing lazy or uncertain about it. She wasn’t playing anymore; she was testing him, pressing in with just enough pressure to keep him caught between anticipation and helplessness.

 

And it was working.

 

N’s breath grew uneven, shallow, like he couldn’t quite steady it. Little sounds slipped from him—barely audible, as if he didn’t even realize they were happening.

 

That made her pause for a second, just long enough to savor it.

 

She trailed her mouth lower again, then back up, slow and deliberate, letting the tension pool between each kiss.

 

And then, when she reached the hollow just above his shoulder—right at the base of his neck—she sank her teeth in.

 

Not gently this time.

 

The bite was firm, calculated. Not enough to hurt him, but enough that he felt it, more so that before.

 

The reaction was immediate.

 

N let out a sharp, involuntary sound—somewhere between a gasp and a whimper, far too loud for where they were.

 

Uzi’s reflexes kicked in before her brain could catch up. Her free hand flew up, covering his mouth. Her eyes widened in fear, but only for a second… until she took an inaudible breath and forced herself to calm down. To just be in the moment.

 

She turned in toward him, her lips brushing the shell of his ear. Her voice came out in a whisper, low and drawn out—entirely unlike the rushed panic from earlier.

 

Shhh…

 

Her breath warmed his skin.

 

She let the hush linger in the space between them, then murmured, “You don’t want anyone else to hear… do you?

 

For a beat, he didn’t respond—like the question had short-circuited something in him. Then, barely perceptible, he gave the faintest shake of his head. No.

 

Uzi exhaled slowly, some mixture of satisfaction and disbelief simmering under her skin. She removed her hand from his mouth, already leaning forward to resume where she’d left off, when—

 

“Uzi…”

 

His voice—quiet, trembling, barely more than a breath—froze her in place.

 

Her body stilled, the air catching in her throat. “…Hmm?” she answered, casting her gaze upon at him. Her voice was light, almost teasing—meant to disguise the sudden spike of nerves fluttering in her chest.

 

She didn’t know what he was going to say.

 

Didn’t know why he said her name like that.

 

But she felt something shift in her. A flicker of heat, unease, something unspoken curling low in her stomach.

 

She waited.

 

N didn’t say anything at first. His face was flushed as his eyes searched hers with a quiet intensity. And then—with a gentle, almost reverent motion—he brought his hand up to her face. His touch was warm and featherlight, the pad of his thumb brushing just beneath her eye as he tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

 

His fingers lingered against her skin, and his voice, when it came, was low, unsteady, and barely a whisper.

 

…Please…

 

It was only one word, but Uzi heard everything in it—need, vulnerability, longing.

 

Her breath caught in her throat, and instinctively, she leaned forward, ready to close the distance between them, to answer him with a kiss. But then—

 

She froze.

 

Her mind abruptly snapped back to the present—the world outside this strange, intimate bubble they had created.

 

She wasn’t in her room.

 

She wasn’t in some private, safe place.

 

She was still on the bus .

 

With her friends. With J . With literally everyone. 

 

They were in plain sight.

 

Kissing him on the neck was one thing. It was subtle, concealed by the angle, hidden beneath layers of implication. But this —this would be obvious. All it would take was one nosy glance over a shoulder, one classmate getting up in the aisle for whatever reason—and they’d see.

 

Everything.

 

Uzi’s heart pounded—not from excitement this time, but from the sudden swell of anxious awareness.

 

She saw N start to lean in toward her, his eyes half-lidded, his lips parting ever so slightly. He didn’t even look like he was thinking anymore—just feeling.  Just like she had been, until the moment snapped.

 

Quickly, Uzi brought her index finger up, pressing it softly against his lips before he could close the gap.

 

N stopped immediately, blinking, as though the fog in his mind had cleared just enough to notice something was off. She felt his breath catch beneath her fingertip, and for the briefest second, his eyes flicked to hers—not hurt, exactly, but…

 

Disappointed?

 

His brows pulled together slightly, but not in frustration. It was something more fragile than that—confused, maybe. Or concerned.

 

“…Uzi?” he whispered. His voice was gentle, uncertain. “What’s wrong?”

 

That was the question she didn’t want him to ask—not because she didn’t know the answer, but because the answer was so achingly stupid.

 

She wasn’t pulling away because she didn’t want this. She wasn’t second-guessing the way his touch made her melt, or how badly she wanted to kiss him right now, to taste the tremble in his breath.

 

She just… couldn’t. Not here. Not like this .

 

And yet, looking at him—his expression soft and tentative, so full of worry she didn’t deserve—it made her chest tighten.

 

Because this wasn’t rejection.

 

This was restraint.

 

Uzi parted her lips, but the words caught before they could form.

 

Her voice stuttered in her throat—barely a breath. She swallowed, forcing herself to get a grip, and tried again, this time a little more steady.

 

“…We can’t do this here.”

 

She hated how small her voice sounded. Not ashamed—just… reluctant. Grounded in reality, even if she wished she could ignore it.

 

The shift in N’s expression was immediate.

 

His hand slowly fell away from her face, retreating back to himself like a tide pulling away from shore. He didn’t meet her gaze. Instead, his eyes turned downward, the soft glow dimming, his posture folding in just slightly.

 

The warmth he carried just moments ago cooled into something quiet—something like guilt.

 

“…Sorry,” he murmured. His tone wasn’t defensive. If anything, it was too gentle, like he was afraid that if he spoke any louder, it might make things worse. He still wouldn’t look at her.

 

She didn’t like seeing him like this.

 

Uzi glanced around the bus—quick, casual. Just a flick of her eyes to the seats ahead of them. Everyone seemed preoccupied. No one was turned around. No one was staring.

 

The coast was clear.

 

She turned back to N.

 

Before he had a chance to say anything else, she reached forward and cupped his face with both hands. He blinked, startled—but didn’t pull away. Didn’t resist. And before he could even register the gesture, she kissed him.

 

Just once.

 

But it was slow. Intentional. Her lips lingered on his, long enough to feel him melt into it, his whole body softening. The sadness in his shoulders uncoiled. His fingers—tensed in his lap—unclenched. He leaned into her, having absolutely no hesitation.

 

And then it was over.

 

She pulled back and immediately flicked her eyes around again. Still no attention. Still invisible. She exhaled softly—relieved.

 

“It’s okay,” she said, her voice low, more a hush than a whisper. Not just to comfort him—but herself, too.

 

Then, with a breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding, she added quietly, “I’m just… scared someone might see.”

 

The admission felt small, but true. Honest in a way that made her chest ache. It wasn’t just fear of being seen , but of what that meant . What came after.

 

She wasn’t used to letting things feel this real.

 

A beat.

 

N gave the smallest of nods, his eyes meeting hers, this time with understanding.

 

“I get it,” he said simply, voice sincere.

 

Uzi didn’t smile, not exactly—but her expression softened.

 

Silence settled between them like a blanket, warm and heavy. For a moment, neither spoke—both wrapped in the fragile stillness that followed everything unsaid.

 

But Uzi didn’t want this to be the end.

 

She wasn’t going to kiss him again—not here, not now—but that didn’t mean she had to pull away completely. She didn’t want to.

 

That realization startled her a little.

 

So instead, she reached for his hand.

 

Quietly. Gently.

 

Her fingers brushed against his, then laced between them—and almost instantly, N’s hand closed around hers like it had been waiting. No pause. No doubt. Just a quiet, instinctive gesture that said more than words ever could.

 

Uzi swallowed hard.

 

Her throat felt tight, her chest worse. The words she needed to say stuck like glass on the way out, catching on her nerves. But she made herself speak anyway.

 

“…We don’t—…have to stop,” she murmured, voice barely audible. She glanced up at him, her expression cautious—like the words might sting, like they might fall flat. “I just… I mean, we can’t do more . Not here…”

 

It was clumsy. Unpolished.

 

But it was honest.

 

And saying it— admitting it —felt like peeling off armor she didn’t realize she’d been wearing.

 

She rarely said how she felt. Not about things that mattered. Not when it made her feel this exposed.  There was something inherently vulnerable about it, something raw and deeply uncomfortable. She hated it. But deep down, she also knew that if she kept it bottled, it’d only gnaw at her later. And she couldn’t risk N misunderstanding her silence. She didn’t want to push him away without meaning to.

 

Especially not now. Not after everything they’d just shared.

 

Slowly and carefully, his gaze steadied. His shoulders eased.

 

He looked at her again, and this time, his face softened into something quieter. Calmer.

 

He gave a small, reassuring smile and nodded. “…Okay,” he said simply.

 

There was no trace of disappointment in his voice. No frustration. Just quiet acceptance—and something else, too. That gentle, unwavering kindness he always had around her. Like she could say anything and he’d still stay.

 

There was a brief pause where neither of them moved. Then, from the corner of her eye, Uzi saw N shift slightly. He seemed uncertain—his hand lifted halfway, gesturing vaguely toward himself, like even he wasn’t sure how to word what he wanted to ask.

 

“Is it… uh, is it okay if I…?” His voice trailed off, his tone hesitant, almost sheepish.

 

He didn’t finish the sentence. Before she could answer, he moved—slowly, gently, as if giving her time to pull away if she wanted to.

 

One of his arms wrapped around her waist, the movement tentative, and then the other joined it, pulling her in just a bit closer. It wasn’t clingy, or possessive—just secure. Protective. Like he was afraid that if he didn’t hold her, she might slip away.

 

Uzi didn’t resist. She leaned into him instead, exhaling a quiet breath as her body relaxed into the warmth of his side. Her arms found their way around his torso in return, wrapping around him with soft familiarity. And when she rested her head on his shoulder, it felt like it belonged there. In return, N tucked his chin on top of her head.

 

“…Yeah,” Uzi murmured, finally responding to his unfinished question. Her voice came out soft and low, almost drowsy. “It’s okay.”

 

And it was. More than okay.

 

For the first time in what felt like ages, she wasn’t overthinking. She wasn’t drowning in spirals of doubt or trying to decode every shift in the air between them. She just was.  Here. With him.

 

Warmth settled over her—heavy, calming. She felt tired, but not the kind that begged for sleep. The kind that made her want to stay exactly where she was, still and safe.

 

Then, without a word, N pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head.

 

It was barely there, just the gentlest brush of contact—but Uzi felt it like a pulse. Her face warmed instantly, heat rushing to her cheeks in a way that once would’ve made her panic.

 

But now… she didn’t feel panicked at all.

 

She just smiled—shy, unsteady, but real.

 

And she hugged him tighter.

 

Not because she needed to, but because she wanted to.

 

-

 

Uzi stirred at the faint sensation of something tapping against her hand. Her eyes fluttered open sluggishly, her mind swimming in the thick haze of sleep. For a second, she didn’t know where she was.

 

Everything felt too quiet. Too warm. Her head was cradled against something solid and comforting—and she realized, with a slow, dawning awareness, that N’s arms were still around her. His chin rested gently on top of her head, unmoving. He was asleep too.

 

She blinked, trying to collect herself. How long had she been out? She barely remembered closing her eyes.

 

Then she felt it again—another tap on her hand.

 

Her eyes slid sideways, still groggy, and that was when she saw someone standing in the aisle beside their seat.

 

Rebecca.

 

She looked down at Uzi with a raised brow, her expression a perfect cocktail of mild amusement and barely restrained curiosity. There was no malice—just the wide-eyed, slow-spreading smirk of someone who had definitely just walked in on something.

 

Their eyes met.

 

And Uzi nearly self destructed.

 

A surge of panic slammed into her so hard she could practically hear her heartbeat.

 

Her body went cold. The horror that struck her in that moment was not just embarrassment—it was nuclear. As if every terrible social fear she’d ever had chose now to manifest at once.

 

“Uzi,” Rebecca said softly, almost teasing. Her voice danced with the kind of tone that said oh, I’m going to remember this forever.

 

Uzi reacted before she could think. She jolted upright, instinctively tearing herself out of N’s hold like she’d been burned. In her frantic haste, she accidentally shoved him to the side.

 

N let out a startled noise as he was abruptly dislodged—and then tumbled right into the aisle with a clatter.

 

Uzi whipped around in a panic. “It’s not what it looks like!” she blurted, wildly waving her hands in front of her like that might somehow undo what had just happened.

 

Rebecca raised both eyebrows, a laugh clearly threatening at the edges of her face.

 

Uzi turned her attention to N, who sat dazed on the bus floor, blinking blearily like he didn’t even know what year it was. His expression was a mix of confusion and sleepy shock.

 

“Oh no…” Uzi whispered under her breath, feeling the heat flood to her face again.

 

She turned back to Rebecca, slowly, dreading what she’d see.

 

Rebecca was biting her lip now, her shoulders trembling with the effort of not laughing.

 

Uzi wanted to implode. Or maybe turn invisible. Or maybe reverse time and never get on the bus in the first place.

Notes:

Sorry abt not posting yesterday like I said I would - or Friday 😭

I like, edited the authors notes in the previous chapter to say “oh I can’t post today but I can post Saturday 🤓☝️” and then I didn’t post 💔

And then yesterday I was gonna edit the author’s notes again since I had like 5 minutes and be like “so actually I can’t post today 💔” BUT I RAN OUT OF CHARACTERS WHAT (or like, letters, as in word count or wtv tf)

Anyways. I really hope this chapter was worth the wait 🤧

And even better news - I’m gonna post the next chapter like right after I post this one! The next one isn’t as long I don’t think but they finally get off this fucking bus 😭💔

It’s been like 4 chapters LMFAO sorry, idrc though I enjoyed writing it and there was important lore stuff (specifically abt N ig)

Ok I’m gonna go post the next chapter now, I’ll probably have more notes and it too. See u then!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 66: New Ore City

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Rebecca crouched ever so slightly, extending a hand down toward N as a snort nearly escaped her. She was clearly struggling to keep a straight face, her lips twitching in amusement. “Need a hand?” she asked lightly, the corners of her mouth betraying her growing grin.

 

N just blinked at her for a second. His eyes were unfocused, like his systems were still rebooting from the fall—and then, all at once, the memory must’ve slammed back into place.

 

His eyes widened, and a bright flush of color rushed across his face, spreading like a spotlight over his entire expression. He stiffened, shoulders jerking slightly as though the sheer embarrassment physically hit him.

 

His gaze darted away instantly, and he visibly hesitated—like he wasn’t sure whether to reach for her hand or curl up and vanish instead. But after an awkward half-second, he gave a small, mechanical-sounding cough, clearing his throat, and managed, “Y—Yeah. That’d be great.”

 

He finally took her hand, carefully avoiding her eyes. The tips of his fingers trembled slightly. He might have been trying to appear casual, but the fact that he was deliberately not looking at her made his awkwardness all the more obvious.

 

Once she pulled him to his feet, he muttered a barely audible, “Thanks…”

 

Rebecca just gave him a breezy smile. “Don’t mention it,” she said, brushing imaginary dust off her hands like it was no big deal at all.

 

And then… silence.

 

Uzi and N both stood completely still, not speaking, barely breathing, just… staring at Rebecca. Neither of them had any idea what to say. The air around them felt impossibly heavy—thick with embarrassment, confusion, and unsaid questions.

 

Uzi’s thoughts were spinning too fast to catch.

 

Okay. Breathe. Just—breathe.

 

Rebecca had seen them. Really seen them. Not just holding hands. Not just leaning close. But curled up together, asleep, tangled together like a couple from one of those painfully cheesy romance dramas Uzi would rather delete her own memory than be caught watching.

 

And yet… out of all the drones who could’ve caught them, at least it was Rebecca. Not J. Not V. Not Thad , thank robo-god.

 

But still.

 

Her face burned. Her joints felt stiff. Her thoughts kept looping over the same phrase: I’m going to die.

 

Rebecca finally broke the tension with an offhand, casual tone that didn’t match the intensity of the moment for Uzi at all. “Everyone’s getting off the bus now,” she said, glancing down the aisle. “We’re here.”

 

Uzi blinked. Her systems kicked back into awareness as she looked out the window. The bus was still—parked. And now that she noticed it, the once loud hum of conversation and laughter had gone eerily quiet. Most of the seats were empty, and the few remaining students were gathering their things, stretching, and stepping off one by one.

 

The realization hit her hard—how long had they been curled up like that?

 

She turned just in time to see N nodding, as if Rebecca’s words had just registered with him too. “Alright,” he said gently, eyes flicking to Uzi. His gaze lingered a second longer than necessary. Then, with a slight, uncertain smile, he added, “See you outside?”

 

It sounded more like a question than a farewell. Like he wasn’t entirely sure if she wanted to see him outside.

 

Uzi gave the faintest nod back, too flustered to form words. He hesitated, then turned and stepped past Rebecca, quickly disappearing down the aisle.

 

Rebecca, however, didn’t follow him.

 

Instead, she planted her hands on her hips and shifted her weight to one leg, eyeing Uzi with that same smirk that made Uzi instantly regret every decision she’d made today.

 

“I didn’t know you and N were dating,” Rebecca said casually, voice laced with faux innocence.

 

Uzi’s internal temperature spiked like a pressure gauge about to burst. Her expression twisted—half panic, half defensive frustration. “We’re not! she blurted, a little too loudly, hands raising as if to physically push the implication away.

 

Rebecca didn’t even flinch. She just kept staring at her, head tilted slightly, one brow lifted. Uzi could feel herself unraveling under the silence.

 

“I—we must’ve just… fallen asleep like that,” she stammered, crossing her arms in a clumsy effort to look composed.

 

“Seriously?” Rebecca asked, arching her eyebrow a little higher, voice thick with sarcasm.

 

Uzi’s jaw tensed. Her eye twitched. “Okay—okay maybe it wasn’t… an accident exactly,” she muttered, gesturing vaguely at the empty seat beside her, “but that doesn’t mean we’re dating!

 

Rebecca only shook her head, her smirk never fading. “Uh-huh.” She turned, waving over her shoulder. “C’mon. Let’s go.”

 

Uzi stayed frozen for a second, still fuming, before reluctantly pushing herself up from the seat. Her movements were stiff with residual embarrassment as she followed Rebecca down the aisle, still very much wishing she could evaporate into thin air.

 

Uzi followed Rebecca off the bus as if she was on autopilot, each step down the aisle echoing her internal monologue of pure humiliation. The pit in her stomach hadn’t lessened—if anything, it had only grown heavier. The memory of waking up like that, in his arms, with Rebecca looming over her… she wanted to shut down and reboot.

 

But the second her boots hit the pavement outside, all her thoughts seemed to scatter.

 

A rush of cool air swept against her chassis, the wind threading through her hair, tugging at her jacket. It was crisp and sharp with city smells—damp concrete, motor-oil fumes, and something oddly floral from the landscaped edges of the sidewalk. For a rare moment, her brain quieted.

 

In front of her loomed the hotel.

 

It wasn’t just big.  It was enormous. Towering windows gleamed under the overcast sky, reflecting the shifting gray clouds and blinking city lights. The entire building was coated in sleek, dark paneling, with glowing accent lights that trailed up the vertical corners like veins of neon. A massive circular fountain dominated the entrance plaza, water cascading from sculpted metal petals at its center, mist curling gently into the air. The pavement below it shimmered from the light rainfall earlier, reflecting the muted skyline like a blurred mirror.

 

Uzi found herself staring.

 

Then she turned slightly—and froze.

 

To her right, stretching far beyond the hotel grounds, were the unmistakable signs of a city alive. New Ore City wasn’t just big—it was sprawling.

 

Towering skyscrapers pierced the clouds in the distance, their edges sharp and flickering with hundreds of tiny lights. Between them, narrow streets weaved like veins, packed with storefronts, kiosks, cafes, neon signs flickering in every shade imaginable, so bright that they were visible even in the early-morning light. Drones bustled everywhere—crossing streets, stepping off transit shuttles, swarming the sidewalks like ants in motion. It was fast-paced, loud, cluttered, and chaotic in a way that was totally foreign to her—she’d never seen anything like it.

 

And then it hit her.

 

They really were here. New Ore City.

 

Something heavy and awestruck sank in her chest. This wasn’t a trip anymore—it was real. She was far from home, in the heart of a city she’d only seen in pictures, with skyscrapers so tall they disappeared into clouds and lights that didn’t seem to sleep. It was overwhelming. It was incredible.

 

Uzi turned slowly back to Rebecca, her eyes wide and unreadable. For a long moment, she didn’t say anything—she just stood there, shoulders slightly hunched, her expression caught somewhere between quiet awe and the residual traces of earlier embarrassment.

 

She had no idea what she was supposed to feel right now. But whatever it was… it was big.

 

Uzi was yanked out of her thoughts like a switch had been flipped when Rebecca’s voice cut through the ambient city noise beside her.

 

“So,” Rebecca said, a little too casually, her tone laced with feigned innocence, “you and N aren’t actually dating?”

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes instantly, her face still flushed from earlier, but now her embarrassment had begun to sour into irritation. She leveled Rebecca with a glare sharp enough to cut steel. “I literally  told you we’re not,” she snapped, arms crossed.

 

Rebecca didn’t flinch—if anything, she just looked even more amused. “Okay, then,” she replied, raising a brow, “so you’re just… talking?”

 

Uzi’s posture stiffened. “Just… talking?” she echoed aloud, blinking. The phrase hung there for a moment like a glitch she couldn’t quite parse. She’d never even thought about putting a label on whatever this was between her and N. It wasn’t like she had planned any of it. The handholding, the flirting, the party, her house after the party, the library, the neck thing on the bus—it had all just happened.

 

Was that what ‘talking’ was?

 

Did she even like him?

 

Her thoughts felt like they lagged for a second as she tried to sort it all out. She was pretty sure she liked him now… right? Maybe. Probably? At least, she felt something. Something real. Something that made her nervous and warm and kind of excited and deeply uncomfortable, all at once. Feelings were stupid. And loud. And impossible to file neatly into any mental folder.

 

“I don’t know,” Uzi finally muttered, scratching the back of her head and avoiding Rebecca’s gaze.

 

Rebecca gave her a look. Skeptical. Amused. Eyebrow arched like a challenge. “How do you not  know?” she asked, half-laughing. “You two were literally cuddled up together on the back of the bus—it was like something out of a romance novel.”

 

Uzi groaned under her breath and looked away, “I haven’t… brought it up,” she admitted after a beat. “The whole, you know—‘what are we’ thing.” She vaguely gestured in the air with her hands.

 

Rebecca tilted her head, intrigued now. “How long has this been going on?”

 

Uzi’s brow furrowed, clearly confused by the question. “What do you mean?”

 

Rebecca shrugged like it was obvious. “Whatever this… thing  is between you and N. How long’s it been a thing?

 

Uzi stared at her, silent for a moment. That was the question, wasn’t it? When had it started?

 

Uzi fell quiet, brows knitting together as she actually thought about it. When had  she and N become like… this? So close that she fell asleep in his arms without even realizing it? So close that she almost forgot they weren’t alone?

 

Her thoughts drifted—uninvited—back to the party. That first kiss. The look in his eyes. The way she had practically short-circuited from what happened in that closet. Just remembering it made her entire face heat up again.

 

But the thing was… it had started before  that, hadn’t it?

 

No one else had noticed it, not even her—not then. She just remembered feeling something unfamiliar when he smiled at her, something that made her nervous and irritated and kind of… curious. But now, in hindsight, it was like watching an avalanche roll toward her in slow motion. The signs were all there. She just hadn’t understood them.

 

How was she just now figuring this out? Why had she never thought about this before? …Probably because she wouldn’t let herself think about it.

 

Still barely meeting Rebecca’s gaze, Uzi rubbed the back of her neck and mumbled, “About a week ago, I guess. At the party…” Her voice trailed off, almost in disbelief. Only a week? Less than, even. The party had been two Saturday’s ago. That was barely  any time at all—and yet, so much had happened.

 

Rebecca seemed to turn that over in her mind for a moment, her expression unusually unreadable. “The party, huh?” she murmured, mostly to herself. Then her eyes widened just slightly, like something clicked.

 

“Wait,” she said aloud, squinting at Uzi with renewed interest. “So you and N actually did do something during Seven Minutes in Heaven?”

 

The reaction was instant. Uzi choked on nothing—completely blindsided. Her hand flew up instinctively like she was trying to physically block the question from hitting her. Her face turned a deeper shade of red than it had all morning.

 

“I—!” she snapped her head away, refusing to make eye contact. “No—! Well… maybe, but—”

 

It was the only answer she could manage, voice stiff and clipped with a quiet sort of panic that betrayed her cool exterior.

 

Her mind spiraled.

 

How does she know about that?! Did someone somehow see?! Did someone hear?! How could she possibly know—

 

The worst-case scenarios launched into freefall as she stared hard at a crack in the pavement, pretending like she hadn’t just relived the kiss in vivid, mortifying detail.

 

Rebecca's expression turned sharp with mischief, her arms folding as she tilted her head ever so slightly. There was a glint behind her eyes now—one of realization, maybe satisfaction—as if she'd just solved a puzzle she didn’t even know she’d been working on.

 

“Well, that would make sense,” she said, voice smooth with teasing. “You two looked like complete strangers when they opened the closet. Like you hadn't said a single  word to each other.”

 

Then, with mock sincerity, she clapped her hands together once. “Really committed to the act. Congrats on the performance, Uzi. Fooled just about everyone—“ She smirked knowingly.

 

Uzi turned her head slowly, glare sharp as broken glass. Her eyes narrowed, and if looks could kill, Rebecca would’ve been disassembled on the spot. “Shut up,” she snapped, her voice clipped and unamused.

 

Rebecca just smiled back at her, all innocence, clearly unfazed. “Okay, okay,” she said lightly, lifting her hands in mock surrender. “Let’s go get our luggage. Everyone else is probably already done, so we won’t have to elbow our way through a mob.”

 

Uzi let out a low sigh, mostly to mask how red her face still was. “Fine,” she muttered, not even bothering to hide the grumble in her voice.

 

She followed Rebecca, dragging her feet a little as they headed toward the bus’s rear. Her thoughts were a jumbled mess of heat and mortification. Part of her wanted to crawl into one of the suitcases and disappear.

 

Another part—small, quiet—wondered if she was making this more embarrassing than it had to be. Rebecca wasn’t exactly mean about it. Annoying, yes. Invasive, definitely . But cruel? Not really.

 

Still, the thought of anyone knowing even a fraction of what had happened in that closet—or on the bus—or any other time—made her want to short out from sheer secondhand horror.

 

Their footsteps echoed lightly on the pavement as they rounded the bus, the hum of the city low and distant around them.

 

Uzi kept her arms folded and her gaze low, watching the tips of her boots move with each step. Her mind wasn’t really on where they were going, though. It was still tangled up in the mess of thoughts she’d been juggling for the past few minutes.

 

Of all drones… at least it was Rebecca. She had thought about it earlier—but now that she thinks about it more, maybe this isn’t the worst thing to happen. Even if she didn’t know Rebecca on a deep, personal level, she knew her well enough to know that she wouldn’t blab to other drones about this. About her. About N.

 

And now, she had someone to talk to. She didn’t have to keep her thoughts in her mind, constantly rolling over to each other with no definitive end. Now, she could get a second opinion. An opinion from someone she trust. An opinion from someone who also knows N, maybe even better than her.

 

Maybe this was a good thing.

 

She sighed, and after a second, turned her head toward Rebecca.

 

Uzi’s expression was hesitant—uncertain in a way she rarely let anyone see. But she had a question for Rebecca. A question she had been asking herself for a while now. The silence around them was starting to feel heavier than just saying the words—so, without giving herself a chance to overthink it too much, she spoke.

 

“…Do you think N actually likes me?” she asked softly. The words came out slowly, almost cautiously, like she was afraid of what might follow.

 

Rebecca blinked and glanced over at her, caught a bit off-guard. She didn’t immediately respond, which only made Uzi regret asking in the first place.

 

She nearly opened her mouth again—maybe to take it back, maybe to say never mind—but before she could, Rebecca raised a hand, signaling that she was thinking.

 

“Huh,” she murmured, tapping a finger against her chin. “Well… I don’t know .” She gave Uzi a look that was more thoughtful than teasing this time. “I mean, I don’t really have much to go off of here.”

 

Uzi grimaced slightly, looking away again. She felt like an idiot for asking. Of course Rebecca didn’t know. How could she ? Uzi had admitted basically nothing.

 

Rebecca shrugged, more casual now. “You’d have to tell me more. Like… what’s really going on between you two?”

 

Uzi gave Rebecca a flat, unamused look, her expression almost unreadable—but the subtle twitch of her eye said enough. She wasn’t annoyed at  Rebecca, necessarily… just at the whole situation.

 

She could tell Rebecca wasn’t just being nosy for the sake of it; she wasn’t teasing anymore. But still, the idea of saying anything more felt like peeling off a layer of skin. And Uzi wasn’t sure she was ready for that.

 

Rebecca caught her silence and raised an eyebrow in response, her expression flickering with a mixture of curiosity and expectation. It was clear she was waiting for some kind of answer—but when none came, she simply rolled with it.

 

“Anyways,” Rebecca said casually, “I don’t know  for sure, obviously. But…” She tilted her head and gave a light shrug, “from the way he was holding you on the bus? I’d say he probably does.”

 

Uzi’s scowl deepened instantly. Her voice sharpened as she snapped back, “What’s that supposed to mean? Is that bad?!”

 

Rebecca snorted with laughter, clearly amused by the panic that had crept into Uzi’s voice. “Calm down, drama queen,” she said, waving her hand dismissively. “No, it’s not bad. I just mean…” She looked at Uzi again, this time a little more gently, “it seems like he cares about you. A lot. If he didn’t like you? He wouldn’t have held you like that. And did you see the way he was looking at you? Again, if he didn’t like you, why would he look at you like that?”

 

She offered Uzi a small, knowing smile before turning away and continuing toward the bus trunk without another word.

 

Uzi didn’t respond. She just stared ahead, the chill of the air doing little to cool the heat still lingering in her face. What was she supposed to say? There was no good response to that. Rebecca wasn’t wrong, and that almost made it worse.

 

Her boots hit the pavement with a heavier rhythm now. Her thoughts spun with no clear direction—just a blur of everything that had happened.

 

And then she realized.

 

And this was just the first  hour of the trip.

 

They still had five days left.

 

Uzi swallowed and glanced toward the hotel again, its towering presence looming like some ominous promise of more chaos to come. All she could do now was hope things didn’t get any worse than this…

Notes:

AHHH

So, finally someone else finds out

Honestly I really like Rebecca, and I’m so glad that I can do more with her character. In the show, she’s basically there for like, comedic relief cuz Lizzy always tells her to shut up or tells everyone else to target her 😭 (like in the promening 💔 def spelled the name of that episode wrong but I don’t feel like looking it up)

And then in the camp episode she literally js gets gruesomely murdered by none other than Uzi 💔🥀

So here I’m not tryna make her OOC necessarily, but like I’m expanding on her character and imagining her like “what if she was friends with Uzi?”

So I’m portraying her as more chill and a little less judgy ig, but she still doesn’t like Lizzy (I don’t think it’s specifically stated in the show that she doesn’t like Lizzy, but one can assume) and is still like, snarky and stuff ig. But she doesn’t have bad intentions like Lizzy does, if that makes sense.

I also imagine her to be like, in but also not in drama, if that makes sense. Like, she wants to *know* everything about everything that’s happening at school, and always finds out somehow, but isn’t deep in it. So basically she’s always in the know abt everything since she’s hella nosy 😭🤚

Can’t say anything though cuz I’m lowkey nosy too 🤧 not to that extent though tbh cuz Rebecca like, cares way more *to* know. Personally idgaf abt *everyone,* but if someone I’m friends with has tea I wanna hear it yk??

Rebecca also seems to me like, even if she *is* hella nosy, she’s smart about it. Cuz like, she’s not gonna be telling everyone all the shit she knows abt them 😭🤚

If she absolutely needed to maybe she’d expose someone, but that’d be in the case of if someone severely pissed her off. And like, even if she knows all the drama, she’s trying to find out what *really* happened and not js rumors that may or may not be true.

So basically overall, she’s js a real one. Good for her 😌🤚

That’s pretty much all I have to say abt that

In other news, idk when I’m posting the next chapter. I’m gonna still be busy asf the next three days 🤕

It’s my last week of school UGH I’m so excited. Wednesday’s my last day IM SO CLOSEEEEE

I’m gonna try and post a chapter within the next 3 days, but if nothing comes out, then 100% there will be one on Thursday, but like actually 😭🤚 I pinkie swear

And also this chapter kinda kicks off the New Ore City arc but like, fr this time 🤩

And it’s not js gonna be like, “five chapters, one for each day” or wtv. Idk how many it’ll be but there will be way more than js one for one day of the trip. If there was for chapters for a 2 and a half hour bus ride, then who knows how may there’ll be 🤷

Should be worth it though cuz I have SO much planned. I’m so stoked—the drama is gonna be crazy 😈

And since I’m abt to be outta school I’ll have way more time to write and post too so that’s fun 🤭 should have a consistent once-a-day posting schedule too, or that’s the plan at least.

Ok that’s everything I have to say. Idk when the next chapter will be posted, so I’ll js say see u Thursday! (Hopefully I can get one out before that 😭) BYEEE

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 67: Lucky

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi stood quietly, her duffle bag slung over one shoulder and her arms crossed stiffly as she scanned the bustling hotel lobby.

 

The tall marble columns and polished floors reflected a soft golden light spilling from the ornate chandeliers above. It was too clean, too shiny—too fancy  for her taste. Around her was a sea of familiar-yet-unknown faces: drones from her grade, all huddled into small friend groups, some chattering excitedly, others checking their phones, a few already slumped on suitcases like they’d been waiting forever.

 

She didn’t recognize most of them. Not really. Sure, she knew names, the occasional voice—but seeing them all like this, away from the rusted walls of their school and out of context, made her realize just how much of an outsider she usually was.

 

Beside her, Rebecca shifted her weight and finally broke the silence. “You see anyone we know?”

 

Uzi blinked, pulled from her thoughts, and turned toward her. She glanced at the crowd again and shook her head, brow furrowed. “There’s too many drones. Everyone’s kinda blending together.”

 

Rebecca gave a low hum of agreement, glancing around as well. Her expression stayed relaxed, but Uzi could tell she was scanning the crowd more intentionally.

 

After a brief pause, Uzi leaned in slightly and lowered her voice. “Do you even know what we’re waiting for?”

 

Rebecca shrugged, looking nonchalant. “Probably just waiting on room assignments or whatever.” She stood on her tiptoes for a second, craning her neck over the crowd.

 

“Yep—there.” She pointed somewhere near the front of the lobby where a few drones stood apart from the others, clipboards in hand and mildly harassed expressions on their faces.

 

“Looks like some of the staff,” she said, glancing sideways at Uzi. “You see ‘em?”

 

Uzi followed her gaze, spotting the teachers immediately. They definitely looked like they were organizing something—talking to one another, scribbling things down, checking lists.

 

Uzi gave a faint nod, then let her gaze wander over the crowded lobby again. Yet, she couldn’t help but feel disconnected. Her mind was elsewhere—on the one miserable detail N had mentioned earlier: the rooms were assigned, and there would be four drones in each.

 

Four.

 


Five days, four roommates, one hotel room.

 

No say in who, no escape.

 

A pit of unease formed in her core, heavy and sinking. She tried not to show it outwardly, but her grip on her duffle bag subtly tightened, fingers curling around the strap. She hated the thought of being stuck with random drones she barely knew—or worse, actively disliked.

 

This whole trip was already enough of a headache.

 

She shot a quick glance at Rebecca beside her and exhaled through her nose. “…You think they’ll room us together?”

 

Rebecca turned her head, blinking like the thought hadn’t crossed her mind until now. “Mm, maybe,” she said, voice casual. “Depends on how they’re assigning it, I guess.”

 

Then, after a brief pause, she looked thoughtful. “If I had to guess, probably alphabetical by last name or something. Makes it easier for the staff to sort everyone.”

 

Uzi made a quiet noise of dismay, already suspecting what that meant for her.

 

Rebecca tilted her head, curious now. “Wait—what is your last name, anyway?”

 

Uzi didn’t even hesitate, just sighed and muttered flatly, “Doorman.”

 

Rebecca's brow furrowed slightly as she turned toward Uzi, clearly processing something. “Wait… Doorman —as in Doorman Enterprises ?

 

Uzi let out a groan through gritted teeth, dragging a hand down her face in exasperation. “Yeah,” she muttered bitterly. “Unfortunately.”

 

Her voice dipped in irritation as she added, “My dad helped start the company or whatever. He never shuts up about it.” She mumbled the next part under her breath with a sigh. “I hate  it.”

 

Rebecca blinked, then gave a small shrug and a half-smile. “Could be worse. At least it’s, like… a door company. Imagine if it was something actually weird.”

 

Uzi gave a dry snort, arms folding across her chest. “I guess. But my dad makes it weird. He acts like doors are some kind of… mechanical miracles. He’s obsessed. Talks about hinges and craftsmanship like they’re his kids.”

 

Rebecca let out a short, amused huff, clearly picturing it. “Yikes. Yeah, that sounds kinda awful.”

 

Uzi pressed her lips into a thin line and muttered, “Tell me about it.

 

There was a pause before Rebecca perked up slightly. “Oh—meant to say earlier, but my last name’s Dosser. ” She smiled, a little brighter now. “So… we’ll probably end up roomed together, right?”

 

For a second, Uzi just stared at her, caught off guard. Then—like a break in the tension that had been dragging her down all day—a small, reluctant smile crept across her face. For the first time since they'd stepped off the bus, she felt the weight in her chest lighten a little.

 

Maybe… just maybe, this trip wouldn’t be completely terrible—so long as Rebecca was her roommate. Which she was going to be. For sure. Probably. Hopefully.

 

From the shifting crowd of drones, a familiar shape broke through the blur—Emily, her eyes scanning until they landed on Uzi and Rebecca. Uzi instinctively lifted her hand in a wave, and Rebecca did the same with an easy smile.

 

“Hey!” Emily called as she walked up to them, her steps quick with relief. “There you guys are!”

 

Uzi gave a slight smile. “Hey, Emily.”

 

Rebecca added with a nod, “What’s up?”

 

Emily stopped in front of them, placing her hands on her hips. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you two,” she said, sounding mildly exasperated.

 

Rebecca gave a careless shrug. “Uzi passed out on the bus. I went back to wake her up before everyone left.”

 

Uzi shot Rebecca a sharp look from the side, brow twitching slightly. The last thing she needed was any hint  of N being mentioned right now. She didn’t think Rebecca would say anything dumb… probably. But still.

 

Rebecca caught Uzi’s expression out of the corner of her eye and smirked faintly, tilting her head in a subtle nod—as if to say Relax, I’ve got you.

 

Uzi exhaled quietly through her nose and shifted her focus back to Emily, trying to smooth over the spike of tension she’d just felt.

 

“So,” Emily said, tilting her head curiously, “how was the ride?”

 

Uzi nearly choked on air. Her mind short-circuited, flashing back to N’s arm around her and—

 

No, no. Not thinking about that right now—

 

Rebecca answered first, lifting one shoulder in a nonchalant shrug. “Eh. It was alright. Long.”

 

Emily turned to Uzi, expectant. Uzi forced her shoulders to stay relaxed and casually replied, “I was asleep, like, the whole time, so—uh—it was fine.”

 

She winced inwardly at how fast the words came out. Too fast. Definitely not casual.

 

She bit her tongue, resisting the urge to grimace.

 

Emily didn’t seem to notice—or at least didn’t comment. Uzi was thankful for that.

 

Still, her cheeks burned ever so slightly, and she suddenly became very interested in the floor tiles.

 

Before Emily had the chance to press Uzi with any more questions, Rebecca cut in smoothly, her tone level. “What about you?” she asked, nudging Emily lightly with her elbow. “How was the ride?”

 

Emily let out a short, dry laugh, her shoulders lifting in a nonchalant shrug. “Honestly? Pretty mediocre.” She smiled, though—not irritated, just resigned. “I talked to Thad the whole time, but like… what else was I supposed to do?”

 

Uzi hissed through her teeth and grimaced in sympathy. “Yikes.” A smirk tugged at her lips as she added, “I don’t know how you survived that long without jumping out the window.”

 

Emily laughed and shook her head, her expression one of mock defeat. “Yeah, I don’t know either. Still recovering, probably.”

 

Uzi’s smirk lingered for a moment, but her eyes soon drifted past the two of them, catching something in the crowd. Small clusters of drones were beginning to split off from the main group, some heading toward the elevators, others chatting as they moved toward the edge of the lobby.

 

She furrowed her brow slightly and nodded in that direction. “Hey… what do you think’s going on?” she asked both of them, her voice curious.

 

Emily followed her gaze, and after a beat, her face lit with understanding. “Oh,” she said, “The staff are telling everyone who’s bunking with who.”

 

She gave an offhand shrug, continuing, “I guess since some groups already know where they’re headed, they’re either going to their rooms… or sneaking off with friends.”

 

Rebecca turned her head slightly toward Emily. “Think we should go figure out who we’re stuck with?” she asked, brushing a strand of hair from her face.

 

Emily nodded. “Yeah, probably a good idea.”

 

Uzi shifted the duffel bag on her shoulder, heart giving a soft thud as she fell into step beside them. She still wasn’t sure who she was hoping for—but as long as it wasn’t someone awful, she figured she could survive the next few days.

 

Maybe.

 

The three of them made their way toward the thickest part of the crowd, weaving between students, all the while with Uzi’s thoughts already jumping ahead.

 

As they walked through the shifting crowd, weaving past classmates and the occasional exhausted chaperone, Uzi glanced over at Emily. Her tone was casual, but there was a thread of curiosity behind it—maybe even hope. “Hey, did you find out who you’re rooming with?”

 

Emily nodded. “Yeah, I found out earlier.”

 

Before Uzi could say anything else, Rebecca perked up beside her. “Ooh, who’d you get? Is it one of us?”

 

Emily’s eyes lit up, and she turned to Rebecca with a spark of excitement. “Oh! I completely  forgot to say—but yeah, it’s you!”

 

Rebecca’s expression burst into delight. She let out a small squeal, hands clapping together with a grin. “No way! That’s gonna be so fun!”

 

Emily laughed, feeding off the energy, “Right? We can do each other’s hair, paint our nails, stay up all night talking about random stuff—”

 

“Wait—” Uzi cut in, her voice firmer than she’d meant it to be. Both of them turned toward her. She hesitated, folding her arms and trying to sound more neutral than nervous. “What about me?” Her voice dipped slightly, the question clumsy as it slipped out. “Am I… in your room too?”

 

Emily’s excitement faltered. Her smile dropped, and she gave Uzi an apologetic look, shaking her head slowly. “No. You’re not.”

 

Uzi didn’t move, didn’t blink. She kept her face blank, forcing her expression to stay unreadable, but her mind was starting to spiral.

 

No?  That didn’t make sense.

 

Her last name was Doorman , Rebecca’s was Dosser.

 

They were right next to each other alphabetically. Why wouldn’t the they be put together? There had to be some sort of oversight. Some dumb glitch in the way names were sorted. Something.

 

She could already feel that unpleasant, tight coil forming in her chest. Uzi bit the inside of her cheek, trying not to let any of it show—not the disappointment, not the confusion, and definitely not the surge of dread.

 

Rebecca glanced over at her, maybe sensing the sudden shift. Emily looked unsure now, clearly wishing she had a different answer.

 

Uzi just nodded once, short and sharp, as if that might somehow convince her body to stay calm. But inside, she was already bracing for the worst.

 

Rebecca’s smile faltered into a soft frown as she glanced over at Uzi. “That really sucks,” she said, arms folding loosely. “I would’ve looked forward to rooming with you.”

 

Uzi gave a small shrug, trying to keep her voice even despite the low hum of anxiety rising in her chest. “Yeah… same.” She hesitated before adding,”I’m kinda freaking out right now, not gonna lie.”

 

Emily looked at her with sympathy and reached out to lightly tap Uzi’s arm. “Don’t worry,” she said reassuringly. “Even if your roommates are weird or annoying, you’re really just there to sleep. You don’t have to hang out with them or anything.”

 

Uzi nodded along as if she agreed, lips pressed together, but the reassurance barely reached her. No matter how much she told herself it wasn’t a big deal, the gnawing unease still clawed at her thoughts. The idea of being stuck for five days in a room with strangers—ones she probably didn’t like—made her want to bolt.

 

They finally reached the edge of the crowd and approached one of the staff members—a middle-aged drone with rimless glasses and a clipboard tucked in the crook of one arm. She glanced up when she saw them, offering a small, polite smile as they came to a stop.

 

“Do you girls already know where you're staying?” she asked, her tone friendly, if slightly tired.

 

Rebecca looked at Emily, then back at the woman with a shrug. “I guess I do now.”

 

Uzi hesitated for a breath before stepping forward slightly, hands shoved deep into her jacket pockets. “Not yet,” she said, her voice steady, but only just.

 

The staff member gave a little nod and adjusted the clipboard in her hand.

 

“Name?”

 

“Uzi Doorman.”

 

The woman’s eyes scanned the sheet in front of her, finger trailing slowly down the list. Uzi’s eyes flicked between the clipboard and the ground, her chest feeling like it was tied in a knot. Every second the woman spent searching made her stomach twist a little tighter.

 

She could already feel her heart crawling its way into her throat.

 

The staff drone skimmed the list, murmuring softly to herself, “Let’s see…” Her eyes traced a line, then she glanced up. “Looks like you’re roomed with Veronica Seral, Jessica Hartman, and Lizzy Summers.”

 

Uzi’s brow furrowed slightly. Veronica and Jessica didn’t ring any bells—but Lizzy Summers definitely did. She knew Lizzy… kind of. All she actually knew about her is that she was close friends with V, and that she probably talked bad about Uzi behind her back. Obviously, she wasn’t a fan, but… at least Lizzy was tolerable. And considering the circumstances, tolerable was practically a gift.

 

Before she could dwell on it, Rebecca lightly bumped her shoulder. “Good luck,” she whispered with a smirk just as Lizzy’s name was mentioned.

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes, then glanced at the staff member. “Wait—” she cut in, puzzled. “Why aren’t the rooms in alphabetical order? These last names aren’t even remotely close.”

 

The woman let out a soft sigh, already sounding like she’d explained this a few times today. “Yeah, I know. The school decided to switch things up this year. Last few trips, a lot of students ended up in the same groups as the year before, so…” she gave a half-hearted shrug, “they randomized the room assignments. They thought it’d be a nice opportunity to, you know, make some new friends.”

 

She smiled brightly, as though the idea were inspiring.

 

Uzi, meanwhile, was dying inside.

 

New friends?!  That wasn’t what she’d signed up for. She didn’t want  new friends—she wanted familiar, predictable company. She’d been clinging to the hope that she and Rebecca would be paired up somehow. And now, because  of this brilliant plan to ‘change things up,’ that possibility had been ripped out from under her.

 

Of course they had to try something new the year she went on this trip.

 

Her jaw tightened. She forced a smile—stiff and dry as sand—and muttered, “Thanks,” before turning on her heel and walking off, eyes cast low, expression unreadable. But inside, she was seething.

 

Just my luck.

Notes:

Ugh *finally* a new chapter 😫

I thought it’d be funny that Uzi’s last name is super recognizable cuz of her dad’s business or wtv. Might seem weird cuz like,’why does everyone know abt a door business?’ But like maybe all the doors from the business have a small watermark kinda thing in one of the corners, and since they specialize in doors that are more heavy-duty it js stronger, it’d be common to see those kinds of doors in schools and stuff

Poor Uzi though cuz ik she absolutely hates the attention from it 💔

Anyways in other news, sorry I didn’t post earlier or wtv, but I promised I was gonna post today at the latest so here 🫟

Honestly I lwky have writers block rn I’m actually gonna die 😫 but the best way to get rid of it is to force yourself to write anyways ig

I think it’s cuz I’m kinda bored rn (THAT DOESNT MEAN IM CANCELING THE STORY DW 😭) it’s js cuz nothings really happening currently in the story. But I couldn’t js fast forward to stuff that’s gonna happen later cuz this chapter was super important, and not including it would js be lazy

I like how it turned out to, I don’t think it’s poorly written, I’m js bored 😭

But like within the next 2-3 chapters some stuff is kinda gonna happen I think

I wonder who Uzi’s roommates could possibly be 🤔

It’s not like I know or anyways 🤷

ANYWAYS idk when the next chapter will be posted. Either tomorrow, Saturday, or Monday. If it’s not tomorrow or Saturday there will 100% be one on Monday, I promiseeee

I need to rip myself out of this brief writers block cuz ugh I hate it

OH ALSO updates abt that discord server thing since I haven’t mentioned it again - basically, it’s probably gonna take a while to make (like way over two weeks, maybe over a month), but it’ll so be worth it. If you’re wondering ‘oh why would it take that long it’s js text channels’ basically - I’m making it look all fancy and aesthetic ig (with fonts), gotta program all the bots, write descriptions for every channel, I’m making like banners for some of the channels ig (cuz I do digital art- what I mean by banners though is like, in the rules channel for example, right above the text that contains the rules they’ll be a photo with a cute background and a font that says ‘rules’. They won’t be super intricate but I still wanna make them), set the permissions and roles, and js a shit tone of other stuff. Oh and I gotta figure out how to use discord again cuz it’s been over two years since I last used it 🥲 - OH and I’m a perfectionist too so keep that in mind 💔

And also I’m not constantly working on it everyday, it’s js kinda a side thing in my free time

Super fun though and I absolutely love the process and js overall organizing things. My plans for it is it’s gonna be a multi-fandom server for not only fic writers/enjoyers, but also it will generally be a place to talk to other people with similar interests (media wise, as in games, tv shows, movies, series in general - all of the above) There will obviously be the general chat as well as chats for each individual fandom too. Oh and if you’re an artist and/or animator (like me :3) there will be channels for that!!

I’m so excited to get it done but again I’m gonna take my time since I don’t wanna get ahead of myself or stress abt it whatsoever. AHH I can’t wait 😖

Ok that’s abt it. Again, the next chapter will be posted either within the next two days or Monday at the latest. See u then!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 68: Sheesh

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi stormed off without a word, her boots hitting the polished tile a little harder than necessary. She wasn’t headed anywhere in particular—just away.

 

Away from the clipboard lady with the fake optimism, away from the dumb room assignments, and away from the very loud realization that she would be spending the next five nights surrounded by strangers.

 

Behind her, she could hear the hurried patter of footsteps trying to catch up. She slowed slightly when she noticed Rebecca and Emily falling behind, letting them close the gap without having to jog.

 

“Where are you even going?” Rebecca finally asked, her tone more curious than critical.

 

Uzi came to a stop with a frustrated breath, her shoulders sinking a little as she turned halfway toward them. “I don’t know,” she admitted, running both hands down her face. Her voice wasn’t angry anymore—it was tired. “I just… I don’t know what I’m supposed to do now.”

 

Emily stepped forward without hesitation and placed a light hand on Uzi’s shoulder.

 

“It’s just five days,” she said gently. “You won’t even be in your room most of the time—we’ve got stuff planned the entire trip.”

 

Uzi let out a shaky sigh, her expression softening, but not by much. Her gaze drifted toward Rebecca, who gave her a warm, reassuring smile.

 

“If it gets that bad with Lizzy,” Rebecca added with a conspiratorial tone, “you can just sneak into our room.”

 

Emily grinned. “Seriously, you know we’ve got your back.”

 

A small smile tugged at Uzi’s lips, reluctant but real. She didn’t look up—her eyes stayed fixed on her feet—but her posture eased.

 

Her hands found her pockets again, fingers curling into the fabric like a lifeline. The weight in her chest didn’t lift, but it shifted—just enough to breathe.

 

“…Thanks,” she muttered, barely above a whisper. It wasn’t much. But she meant it.

 

Uzi hesitated, glancing at the floor as she tried to think of something else to say—but a voice suddenly echoed above the hum of the lobby, sharp and clear.

 

“Alright everyone! Please head to your assigned rooms and get settled in. We’ll reconvene here in about an hour for the orientation!”

 

The crowd began to break apart in waves, drones peeling off in small groups, some laughing, others picking up their duffel bags or dragging their suitcases behind them. Uzi looked up, instinctively scanning for the source of the voice. It sounded like one of the staff members who’d come on the trip—someone trying to act more cheerful than they felt.

 

She turned back toward Rebecca and Emily.“So… what do we do now?” she asked, her voice unsure.

 

Rebecca shrugged and adjusted the strap on her duffel. “Guess we should find our rooms before someone yells at us.”

 

Uzi’s posture slumped slightly, the weight of reality settling again. “And what about me? Where do I go?” Her tone wasn’t desperate, exactly, but there was a sharp unease behind it she couldn’t hide.

 

Emily gave her a sympathetic look and touched her arm lightly. “You should try finding Lizzy. If she’s not already in the room, she’s probably heading up now.”

 

Uzi bit the inside of her cheek, chewing nervously. That didn’t exactly make her feel better.

 

Emily, catching the flicker of doubt in her expression, smiled gently. “Seriously, don’t stress. It’ll be fine. And if it sucks, just come find us.”

 

Uzi took a slow breath, trying to quiet the anxious static in her head. After a moment, she nodded stiffly and straightened her shoulders. “Okay. Right. Yeah.”

 

She paused again, looking between them. “…Where should I even start?”

 

Rebecca scanned the room quickly, then pointed toward the elevators. “Try over there. You’ll probably run into her—or one of her friends at least.”

 

Uzi nodded again, this time forcing a strained smile. It didn’t quite reach her eyes, but it was something.

 

Emily spoke up before Uzi could turn away. “Let’s meet back here once everyone’s down again, yeah?”

 

“Yeah,” Uzi said, more quietly. Rebecca gave a confirming nod as well.

 

With that, a round of quick, quiet goodbyes passed between them, and they finally split—Emily and Rebecca heading off in one direction, and Uzi, with a small lump of dread lodged in her throat, walking toward the elevators on her own.

 

When Uzi finally reached the elevator, she was met with the low buzz of idle chatter and the occasional sound of a notification going off.

 

A small cluster of drones loitered nearby, scrolling through their phones or chatting aimlessly with friends. The elevator doors remained closed, a soft ding echoing every so often—probably too full to open again just yet.

 

Uzi scanned the group, her gaze flicking from face to face until it landed on one that made her stomach drop.

 

V.

 

She was leaned back slightly against the wall, arms folded across her chest, her expression flat and unreadable. Her posture screamed disinterest, like she’d rather be anywhere else but was too indifferent to care enough to leave.

 

Uzi instinctively bristled, her first impulse to turn around and pretend she hadn’t seen her—but then she remembered: V was close with Lizzy.

 

If anyone knew where Lizzy was, it would be her.

 

Uzi hovered awkwardly for a second, silently debating whether it was worth it. Then, after a reluctant breath, she stepped forward.

 

V caught sight of her immediately, her eyes flicking up and down in a slow, measured glance. She didn’t say anything. She didn’t even shift.

 

Uzi stopped a few feet in front of her, hands jammed in her pockets. “…Hey,” she said, forcing the word out like it weighed more than it should’ve.

 

V blinked once, slow and bored. “What do you want?” she asked, her voice as flat as her expression. It wasn’t hostile exactly, but it definitely wasn’t welcoming either—just blunt, like everything else about her.

 

Uzi resisted the urge to sigh. Or grimace. Or sarcastically snap something back. She knew V wasn’t necessarily trying to be rude… probably. This was just how she was—detached, aloof, like the world didn’t quite interest her unless it directly entertained her.

 

With a forced half-laugh and a shrug, Uzi replied, “Right… uh, sorry. I was just wondering if you’ve seen Lizzy around?“

 

V barely moved, though she raised one hand lazily to inspect her nails as if Uzi’s question barely registered. “Haven’t seen her,” she replied, casual and indifferent. She didn’t look up from her hand.

 

Uzi froze where she stood, her thoughts spinning. She hasn’t seen her? That wasn’t the answer she needed. In fact, it was the opposite of what she needed. She could already feel the pressure starting to climb in her chest again—tight and frustrating, like steam caught under a lid.

 

But she didn’t let it show. At least… she tried not to.

 

With as much composure as she could gather, Uzi lifted her chin slightly and asked, “Okay, well… do you have any idea where she might’ve gone?”

 

V finally looked up from her nails, eyes focusing on Uzi properly for the first time. Her stare wasn’t exactly hostile, but it had weight to it—steady and unbothered, like she was silently evaluating whether Uzi was worth the effort of continuing this conversation.

 

Uzi refused to flinch, even as her circuits buzzed with nerves. She wouldn’t let herself fold just because V looked at her like she could see straight through her.

 

V’s head tilted a fraction. “No clue,” she said simply, then added with a slight edge of curiosity, “Why?”

 

That one word—so short and quiet—managed to press against Uzi’s nerves more than it should’ve. Her breath caught, too fast for her liking. Seriously? * Why did V make everything feel like a challenge?

 

She let out a discreet sigh, not loud enough to make it obvious she was flustered.

 

“Because she’s my roommate,” Uzi muttered, rubbing the back of her neck awkwardly. “And I have no idea where I’m supposed to go, so I kind of need to find her.”

 

That actually got a reaction.

 

V pushed off the wall, straightening up just enough to suggest she was vaguely intrigued now. Her eyebrows lifted ever so slightly. “Wait… Lizzy’s your roommate?”

 

Her voice had shifted—just a touch. Less disinterest, more surprise.

 

And that small change in tone made Uzi’s unease grow even stronger. Was that a bad thing? Why did she sound surprised like that?

 

Uzi held her breath for a moment too long before answering. She nodded slowly, the movement stiff, uncertain. “Yeah,” she said, voice cautious. “That’s what I was told.”

 

V’s expression didn’t shift much—but it did change. Subtle, but there. The hard, disinterested look softened just slightly, her brows drawing in a fraction. It wasn’t sympathy, exactly. More like realization. Or maybe frustration.

 

She crossed her arms tighter, then muttered, “I’m her roommate too.” A pause. “And so is J.

 

Uzi blinked. Her eyes widened, just a bit—barely enough to be noticeable, but it was all she could do to keep her jaw from falling open.

 

Wait.

 

Wait.

 

Veronica. Jessica.

 

V. J.

 

Oh.

 

“Oh no,” she muttered under her breath, oil running cold. “This is bad.”

 

V let out a sharp breath through her nose and gave Uzi a look—half exasperated, half seriously? “You think?

 

Uzi didn’t bristle at the tone. She knew it wasn’t meant as personal venom. V wasn’t snapping at her because she didn’t like her—it was because J was the other roommate. And that changed everything.

 

“I—” Uzi started, trying to ask what exactly was going to happen now, but V cut her off before she could even finish drawing in the air.

 

“Don’t,” V said flatly. “There’s nothing you can do.”

 

Uzi’s mouth closed again. Her hands found her jacket pockets, and she shoved them in there, gripping the fabric inside.

 

V looked off to the side, clearly chewing on something behind her eyes. Her fingers drummed once on her arm before she finally spoke again.

 

“Just…” She sighed. “Don’t say much. At all. Especially not around J.”

 

Uzi blinked, listening intently now.

 

“If she tries to talk to you, even if it’s something small,” V went on, her tone clipped and serious, “she’s probably testing you. Reading you. Trying to figure out what you know.” Another pause. “Don’t give her anything.”

 

Uzi nodded slowly, her chest feeling tight. “Got it,” she said, though her voice came out softer than she liked.

 

V groaned and leaned her head back against the wall with a thunk , sounding very done with the entire situation. “This is so annoying,” she muttered, more to herself than anything.

 

Uzi didn’t respond. She wasn’t even sure how to. Her mind was a whirlwind of questions and dread—what was going to happen when she walked into that room? Would J start interrogating her? Would V have her back if things got tense?

 

She stared at the floor, her shoulders tense, as silence settled briefly between them—heavy and full of implication.

 

A sharp ding broke the uneasy silence between them, echoing through the hallway like a bell tolling for Uzi’s impending doom.

 

She turned toward the elevator just as the doors slid open with a mechanical hiss, revealing a crowd of unfamiliar drones inside. A few shuffled out, creating just enough space for the waiting group—including Uzi and V—to step in.

 

Uzi followed V into the cramped space, careful not to brush against her arm. She wedged herself between a drone scrolling absently through their phone and another whispering something to a friend, their voices hushed and quick.

 

There was barely room to breathe.

 

The buzz of quiet conversation, the soft taps of screen-swipes, and the low hum of elevator machinery filled the confined space, but Uzi heard none of it.

 

She was too tense.

 

Too aware of herself.

 

Too aware of V standing silently beside her, arms still crossed, staring straight ahead like she was seconds away from punching through the metal wall.

 

Uzi didn’t even try to look her way. Not because she was afraid of awkward eye contact—she could handle that—but because she knew how V was. One glance, one twitch of expression, and V might decide she was being weird. Or suspicious. Or annoying. And Uzi wasn’t in the mood to be on the receiving end of whatever sarcastic quip V might throw her way.

 

Her fingers itched to fidget, to pull at the edges of her sleeves or dig into her pockets, but she made herself stay still. Calm. At least outwardly.

 

The elevator crawled upward with a sluggish hum, the seconds dragging with every floor they passed. The weight in her chest grew heavier with each moment she was stuck in that metal box. Everything felt too loud, too slow, too close.

 

Then finally— ding.

 

The doors opened again, and a rush of movement pushed Uzi forward with the crowd.

 

She stepped out onto the fourth floor, noticing the tiled hallway looked identical to the one downstairs—sterile, wide, and lit with buzzing fluorescents. No one stayed behind in the elevator. That told her everything she needed to know: this was the stop. Everyone was roomed here.

 

And while part of her felt mildly relieved to know she wouldn’t have to figure out another floor or risk getting lost, it did little to untangle the knot in her stomach. She didn’t know what was behind the door she was walking toward. And that, more than anything, made her nervous.

 

She didn’t like walking blind.

 

Right after Uzi had stepped out of the elevator, she noticed V was already several paces ahead, walking like she had somewhere important to be and no intention of waiting for anyone to catch up—least of all Uzi.

 

She let out a quiet breath through her nose, more exasperated than anything, before forcing herself to move.

 

“Wait,” she called, quickening her steps to close the distance between them.

 

V stopped just barely, glancing over her shoulder with a look that screamed really? Her tone matched the expression. “What?”

 

Uzi hesitated, eyes flicking off to the side. “I just figured I’d follow you,” she mumbled, shifting the strap of her bag on her shoulder. “Since… you know. Same room.”

 

V scoffed lightly, rolling her eyes like Uzi had just stated the most obvious thing in the world. But she didn’t argue.

 

Without another word, she turned back around and kept walking, her pace slightly slower now—enough for Uzi to keep up without jogging.

 

They walked in silence down the sterile hallway, each footstep echoing softly off the tile. Uzi tried to focus on the numbers printed on each door, counting them as they passed. Her heart thudded a little faster the closer they got to the inevitable.

 

Finally, V stopped in front of a door.

 

Room 478.

 

Uzi eyed the numbers. “This it?” she asked, though she already knew the answer.

 

V didn’t even look at her. “What do you think,” she replied, voice dripping with dry sarcasm.

 

Uzi made a face. “Okay, sheesh. You didn’t have to say it like that.

 

“Whatever,” V muttered, not bothering to elaborate or apologize. She reached for the handle, pushed the door open, and walked in like it was nothing.

 

But for Uzi, it wasn’t nothing.

 

She stood frozen for just a second longer, steeling herself. Her hand tightened around the strap of her bag as she prepared to step inside—not just into a hotel room, but into a five-day test of patience, nerves, and pretending to be normal around two of the most intimidating drones she knew.

Notes:

So remember when I said I had writers block?

Well, I’m kinda over that now 🫟

UGH omg I finally had the time to write a little ahead, and I love where this is going. Especially the chapter after the next chapter AHHHH

And then, ik I’ve said it a million times, but I have so much planned for this arc and so much is gonna go down

For the most part at least- haven’t written all of that out yet, I js have an outline ig 😭

Still, I can’t wait to post it

If I could I would’ve posted the next two today but like, then yall would have to wait even longer for me to post so that would such

So next chapter will be posted tomorrow!!! Yuhh I can’t wait, that one’s pretty good

Kinda off topic, but today is exactly 3 months from when I posted the first ever chapter (which was February 19th)

So I’ve been posting for like, almost 90 days- isn’t that crazy???

And not even close to being done 😭😭 or at least, like, I’m closer, but once this arc is over (which will be who knows when-) idk if there’s gonna be another one or som else, it really js depends on how this ends. Based off the outline, though, I’m debating whether to have this one big thing happen. If it happens, the story will probably continue on wayyyy longer, but if it doesn’t it’ll be easier to end, if that makes sense. Ik that’s vague, but obvi I’m not gonna spoil that, and it might not even happen yk?

Overall I’m js so so excited for all the stuff happening soon. I’d rather focus on the present than the end, cuz the present is more important rn-

That’s pretty much everything I have to say. Again, the next chapter will be posted tomorrow! See yall then 😖

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 69: Opposition

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi stepped quietly into the room, her boots scuffing softly against the carpeted floor. She came to a slow stop just inside the doorway, eyes scanning the space in front of her as she took it all in.

 

It wasn’t some grand luxury suite, but it was… nice. Surprisingly so. The lighting was warm, slightly yellow but not harsh, casting a gentle glow over the neutral-toned walls.

 

To the immediate left was a bathroom, the door slightly ajar—she caught a glimpse of clean tile, soft white towels hanging neatly, and a small mirror over the sink.

 

On the right, across from it, was a compact closet with sliding wooden doors, barely big enough for two drones to share. Just ahead, the heart of the room opened up.

 

Four twin beds were arranged neatly along the left wall, their headboards pressed evenly against it like a line of soldiers. Between each bed sat narrow nightstands with drawers—identical and minimal, clearly made to fit just the essentials. The beds themselves were neatly made, each topped with a folded grey blanket and a single pillow. They didn’t look especially soft, but at least they were clean.

 

At the far end of the room, a large window stretched across the wall, its curtains tied back to let in the muted glow of the afternoon sky. Below it sat a small circular table with four chairs tucked around it—simple wood frames with faded cushions. Not exactly inviting, but functional.

 

A small dresser rested against the opposite wall, directly across from the beds, and atop it sat a modest-sized television, angled slightly down as if encouraging drones to gather around it at night. Everything about the room felt compact, efficient… slightly sterile. But livable.

 

Uzi took another slow step forward, and she followed V fully inside the room. Her gaze swept over the beds again, and for a moment, she hesitated.

 

There was no one else here.

 

Just her and V.

 

She wasn't sure if that was better—or worse.

 

Before she could dwell on it too long, she noticed V already moving, cutting across the room with her usual casual air.

 

She tossed her bag down beside the bed closest to the door—clearly not one to overthink things—and dropped onto the mattress without grace or ceremony. She sprawled out, limbs half-draped off the edge, and let out a long, weary sigh.

 

“I’m already exhausted,” V muttered aloud, mostly to herself. “And this trip hasn’t even started.”

 

Uzi glanced over at her, part of her tempted to agree— Yeah, same.  But she bit the comment back before it could leave her mouth. V didn’t look like she was in the mood for conversation, and Uzi wasn’t in the mood to accidentally provoke her.

 

Instead, she stood in silence, letting her eyes drift back toward the remaining beds. She still hadn’t picked one.

 

The air in the room felt strangely heavy—maybe it was just the nerves. Or the fact that J was going to walk through that door at any second. Either way, her pulse had picked up again, a tight knot forming in her chest.

 

She inhaled quietly, then exhaled just as softly, trying to keep herself from thinking too much. One day at a time. One hour, even. That’s all she had to survive.

 

Just… keep breathing.

 

Uzi hesitated for only a second before deciding to take the bed beside V’s. It seemed like the lesser of several evils.

 

She crossed the room and let her bag drop with a soft thud against the floor, then eased down onto the mattress, her back pressing lightly against the headboard. The sheets felt stiff beneath her hands, but at least it was her space now. Sort of.

 

She glanced sideways. V looked like she was already half-asleep—eyes closed, arms splayed out, her feet still dangling over the edge of the bed. A quiet groan escaped her as she shifted, clearly uninterested in doing anything productive for the next hour. Uzi didn’t blame her.

 

Letting out a soft breath through her nose, Uzi reached into her jacket pocket and pulled out her phone. The screen lit up in her hand, and she lazily unlocked it, thumbing through her notifications without much thought. Usual stuff—some texts from her dad she hadn’t answered yet, a couple group chats that were mostly just memes, a notification from some dumb app she kept forgetting to uninstall—

 

And then she saw it.

 

A message from N. 

 

Her breath caught a little, and warmth crept up her neck before she could stop it. It wasn’t even opened yet, but her thumb hovered over the screen like it was a live wire.

 

What did he say? Should she respond right away? Should she wait

 

The door swung open.

 

Uzi jumped slightly, her attention snapping to the sudden movement. The door hit the wall with a soft thunk, and standing in the doorway was J . Her silhouette cast a long shadow on the floor, and right behind her, Lizzy trailed in, chatting about something Uzi couldn’t hear.

 

For a second, J didn’t move. She just stood there, scanning the room—and then her eyes landed on Uzi.

 

Their gazes locked.

 

It couldn’t have lasted more than half a second, but it felt stretched, almost like the air between them had tensed. J’s expression was unreadable… almost. But Uzi swore— swore —she saw the corner of her mouth tug upward. Just slightly.

 

A smirk.

 

Uzi stiffened, unsure if she was imagining things or if it was real. But either way, the feeling it left her with made her skin crawl.

 

Before she could react, Lizzy brushed past J, beaming as she spotted her. “Oh my gosh, Uzi! You got here before us?” she said brightly, her voice all sunshine and perkiness.

 

Uzi blinked, thrown off by the sudden friendliness. “Uh. Yeah,” she muttered, her voice neutral.

 

Lizzy didn’t seem to notice—or care. She grinned and added, “Still! It’s so nice to see you!”

 

Uzi forced a small nod, her lips twitching into something that only vaguely resembled a smile.

 

On the surface, Lizzy’s tone was cheerful, almost welcoming—but Uzi knew better. That kind of bubbly enthusiasm always felt like a mask. A carefully polished act. Lizzy didn’t really care that she was here early. She probably didn’t care she was here at all —not unless there was something juicy to whisper about later.

 

Robo-god. This was going to be awful.

 

Uzi turned her eyes back to her phone, but her screen had gone dim again. The message from N still waited—unread. And now, suddenly, she wasn’t sure if she even wanted to look at it with them in the room.

 

Uzi’s finger hovered over N’s message, just about to open it—heart ticking a little faster in anticipation—when Lizzy’s voice chimed in again, cutting straight through her focus.

 

“So,” Lizzy said brightly, drifting over with practiced casualness, “how was the bus ride?”

 

Uzi blinked, slowly locking her phone and setting it screen-down on the bed beside her. Of course. Of course Lizzy had more to say.

 

She watched as Lizzy approached and claimed the bed directly next to hers. Uzi almost felt a flicker of gratitude— almost. At the very least, it meant J wouldn’t be right beside her all night, which honestly felt like dodging a bullet.

 

Still, her brain decided now was the perfect time to replay a memory she didn’t* want—her and N sitting shoulder-to-shoulder, the warm weight of his arm brushing hers, that stupid spark that made her feel… something.

 

Nope. Absolutely not. She shoved the thought back into the recesses of her mind like stuffing junk in a drawer. Not thinking about that right now.

 

She turned to Lizzy, her expression level and unreadable. “It was fine,” Uzi replied simply, her tone as neutral as the white paint on the hotel walls.

 

Her stomach still twisted a little at the memory, but it didn’t show—not even the smallest flicker in her features. She kept her voice even, her posture loose. A perfect mask.

 

This—this was easy.

 

Because with a friend, someone she actually  cared about, her face would’ve betrayed her. She would’ve flushed, ducked her gaze, maybe mumbled something that barely made sense before insisting it was nothing. The lie would’ve come out tangled in guilt, like a secret she hated keeping.

 

But with Lizzy?

 

It was effortless.

 

There was no guilt. No hesitation. No flicker of remorse for keeping the truth locked behind her teeth. Lizzy wasn’t entitled to it. She didn’t deserve to know about anything Uzi said or felt—on that bus or otherwise. Lizzy didn’t even know who N really was. Or what  he meant to her.

 

And so, the lie had slid out of her like silk.

 

Just fine. Nothing more.

 

Lizzy busied herself with her bag, humming something tuneless under her breath as she arranged her things with a practiced touch—setting down a pink, luminescent water bottle, then uncapping a bottle of perfume and giving it a single delicate spritz on her arm. The sweet, artificial scent hung lightly in the air. Lip glosses followed, clattering onto her nightstand like polished trophies, each one in a shade that screamed curated effort.

 

Then, without looking up, Lizzy spoke. “So, who’d you sit with on the bus?”

 

Casual. Offhand. Just a simple question, like she was making conversation for conversation’s sake.

 

But to Uzi, it felt like a wire tightening around her chest.

 

Her fingers twitched where they rested on her phone. She froze for the briefest second—just long enough for the panic to spark in her circuits. Her mind raced. Should she say it? Tell the truth?

 

I sat with N.

 

The words were right there, but they hit a wall—because across the room, she saw J.

 

J was making her way toward the bed beside Lizzy’s, and although she didn’t speak, her presence was deafening.

 

Just before sitting down, she shot Uzi a look—barely a glance, just a flicker of attention—but it was enough. It felt intentional. Like J knew exactly when to look.

 

Like she was listening.

 

Uzi swallowed hard and forced the panic down.

 

No. She couldn’t say N. That was just asking for trouble. Her brain scrambled for another name, any name, and the first that came to her—

 

“Rebecca,” Uzi said quickly, as smoothly as she could manage. “I sat with Rebecca.”She held her breath, hoping she hadn’t just dropped herself in a pit of tar.

 

To her relief, Lizzy didn’t question it. If anything, her face barely shifted—just the slightest flicker of something… vaguely annoyed? Her mouth twitched like she might roll her eyes, but she caught herself and smiled instead. A social reflex. False and hollow.

 

She’d bought it.

 

Uzi let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding and leaned back slightly, trying to loosen her posture, even if the tension still sat heavy behind her shoulders.

 

To keep the conversation moving—and more importantly, to steer the spotlight away from herself—Uzi forced herself to speak again.

 

“What about you?” she asked, glancing over without really looking at Lizzy.

 

The question was mechanical, devoid of any real curiosity. She didn’t particularly care about Lizzy’s answer—but politeness was armor. A distraction. Something to hide behind.

 

And in a room with J, she’d take any cover she could get.

 

Lizzy's smile stretched wider—bright, radiant, almost too much. Her whole face lit up like Uzi had just handed her a compliment instead of a neutral question.

 

“Trevor,” she said, practically glowing as she clasped her hands together. “I sat with Trevor. Do you know him?”

 

Uzi opened her mouth, ready to give a simple no—but she didn’t get the chance.

Lizzy was already diving in.

 

“Oh my gosh, he is so  hot,” she gushed, flipping her hair off her shoulder like she was recounting the moment for an audience. “I got to sit with him for like, almost three  full hours. And I swear, he loved  talking to me. He totally didn’t want me to leave when we got here.”

 

She gave a little laugh, soft and self-satisfied, then added, almost dreamily, “I mean, who wouldn’t?”

 

Uzi blinked slowly, keeping her face carefully blank.

 

Here we go.

 

Lizzy was still talking—going on about how Trevor had complimented her outfit, or maybe it was her laugh, or her eyes—but Uzi had already stopped listening. Her brain filtered it out like static. She shifted slightly on her bed, her posture subtly slouching in resignation, and sighed inwardly.

 

If this was how Lizzy was going to talk for the rest of the trip—nonstop, self-absorbed, oblivious—then she was in for a long few days.

 

She reached for her phone without a word, stealing a glance at Lizzy just to make sure she wasn’t being watched too closely. No risk of that. Lizzy wasn’t even looking  at her—just talking for the sake of hearing herself.

 

“So then,  when I was packing, I literally could not decide on what shoes to bring,” Lizzy continued, dramatically resting a hand on her forehead as if it had been some grand dilemma. “Like, do I go cute and casual? Or stylish and confident? Or both?! Ugh.

 

Uzi barely resisted the urge to roll her eyes.


Instead, she unlocked her phone and opened her messages, tuning Lizzy out completely. Her screen lit up—and there it was.

 

N’s message.

 

The one she hadn’t had the chance to read.

 

And right now, it was the only thing that felt remotely important.

 

The screen glowed softly in Uzi’s hand, drawing her in with that one unread message. Her stomach twisted as she tapped it open.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [10:52 AM]:  Hey, do you think we could meet when we go back down to the lobby?

 

That was it.

 

No context. No tone. Just that one line.

 

Uzi stared at it, unblinking.

 

Meet?


Why?


What did he mean by
meet?

 

Was this about the bus ride? Had she made it weird? Was he upset? Did she cross a line somehow? Her mind unraveled a dozen anxious scenarios all at once, each one worse than the last. Maybe he regretted sitting with her. Maybe he was just being nice. Maybe he hated  her now.

 

No. No, she was overthinking. Probably.

 

Was she?

 

Without letting herself dwell another second, her fingers moved almost on instinct.

 

Uzi [10:58 AM]: sure

 

She hit send before she could talk herself out of it.

 

Immediately, a ripple of anxiety passed through her. It was too casual, wasn’t it? But what else could she say? She wasn’t about to text him asking why —that would make her sound needy. Or nervous. Or both. Which she was, but still.

 

She lowered the phone into her lap and exhaled quietly through her nose, trying to keep herself from visibly deflating. Her head felt like it practically was buzzing.

 

Does he need to talk about something…?

 

But her train of thought was suddenly derailed by a voice—not Lizzy’s, whose babbling had faded into white noise—but another. Firmer. Sharper.

 

“Uzi.”

 

She blinked and looked up.

 

J.

 

Uzi stiffened just slightly. J stood at her bed, posture relaxed, expression unreadable—but her eyes were locked onto Uzi with unnerving precision.

 

“How are you liking the school so far?”

 

Uzi’s mind blanked.

 

“…What?” she replied before she could stop herself. It came out a little more defensive than she’d meant it to.

 

J just shrugged with a lopsided smile, the kind that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Since it’s your first year,” she said smoothly. “Just wondering how you’re settling in.”

 

That caught Uzi off guard.

 

Had she ever told J it was her first year? No. She would’ve remembered that. Right? Maybe she had just mentioned it around her. But that was such a random, insignificant detail, why would J even remember that?

 

And regardless, just… how did she know?

 

Uzi’s gaze narrowed just slightly, mind kicking back into gear. She took a breath, sitting up straighter. J’s stance hadn’t changed, but her eyes were doing something subtle—scanning, reading.

 

Just like V had warned her.

 

Right. J wasn’t asking to be friendly.

 

She was probing.

 

And Uzi refused to let herself be picked apart.

 

Keeping her voice as casual as possible, she replied, “It’s been fine so far.”

 

Nothing more. Nothing less.

 

She leaned slightly back into the headboard again, her expression cool, shoulders deceptively loose—masking the spike of nerves still crawling beneath her shell.

 

But J didn’t press further. She only smiled again—thin, unreadable—and continued whatever unpacking she had been doing without another word.

 

Uzi didn’t look away until J did.

 

She hated this. Every interaction felt like a quiet test.

 

And she had no idea if she was passing.

 

A shift of movement stirred behind Uzi. She glanced over her shoulder to see V now sitting upright, arms stretching high above her head in a slow, lazy arc. The other drone let out a long yawn, then grabbed her phone from where it had been resting beside her on the bed.

 

A few seconds passed before she spoke aloud, her voice carrying easily across the quiet room. “We should probably head back down,” V said through another yawn. “It’s been, like, half an hour.”

 

Uzi gave a silent nod, brushing a lock of her hair aside as she pushed herself up from the bed. The tension in her frame hadn't eased much since they'd arrived, but the movement helped distract her from her nerves.

 

Lizzy, unsurprisingly, was already on her feet. She breezed past Uzi with a light skip in her step, her skirt swaying slightly with the motion. She reached the door, practically glowing with self-satisfaction, and placed her hand on the handle.

 

Then, she paused and glanced over her shoulder, addressing the rest of the room with a chipper lilt in her voice. “C’mon, slowpokes,” she said, her tone playful but just sharp enough to carry a note of superiority.

 

Her grin sparkled in that way that felt rehearsed, and with that, she turned and walked out.

 

Uzi’s gaze drifted left, just in time to catch a glimpse of J standing beside her bed. She was placing a book on her nightstand—precisely, deliberately.

 

Uzi watched her fingers smooth the cover down, then nudge the spine into perfect alignment with the edge of the furniture. Not a millimeter out of place.

 

It was such a small detail. But it said everything.

 

J didn’t look at her, but Uzi didn’t need her to. There was something unsettling in that stillness.

 

As Lizzy exited, V trailed close behind, her posture relaxed and hands casually shoved into the pockets of her hoodie.

 

She didn’t say anything, didn’t even glance at Uzi or J—just followed Lizzy out with that same cool indifference that made her hard to read.

 

Uzi’s chest tightened. Everyone was moving. Everyone seemed to know their place, what to do next.

 

She hesitated for half a second longer, then stepped forward, following the others, feeling the weight of J’s presence behind her like a quiet shadow.

 

She didn’t look back.

 

Just as Uzi had stepped into the doorframe, something stopped her dead in her tracks.

 

A hand.

 

It rested lightly on her shoulder, not rough or violent—but precise, purposeful. There was a weight to it that didn’t come from pressure, but from presence. The kind of gesture that said, Don’t move. Don’t speak. Just listen.

 

Every wire in Uzi’s frame seemed to tighten at once. She didn’t have to look. She already knew.

 

J.

 

Her posture stiffened, her limbs frozen in that fragile space between staying and running. Behind her, J’s voice sounded—calm, almost friendly.

 

“You looking forward to the trip?” she asked smoothly, tone light as a breeze.

 

Uzi swallowed hard. Her voice didn’t come immediately—her throat felt dry—but she made herself nod, just once, and replied with a clipped, “Yeah.” It wasn’t convincing. But it was steady. And that was enough.

 

She obviously wasn’t going to admit the truth: that she felt like she was walking into a loaded trap. That the pit in her stomach hadn’t gone away since the elevator.

 

“Me too,” J replied after a beat, and her voice was… warm. Almost amused. But that made it worse.

 

There was a pause. Then, with the faintest lean forward, J added softly, close enough that Uzi could feel the hum of her voice near her ear: “I just hope nothing… unfortunate happens.”

 

There was no overt threat in the words. No venom in the tone.

 

But it was the ease with which she said it that made Uzi’s internal systems shiver.

 

That calm, almost affectionate menace. Like a cat purring just before it sinks its claws in.

 

For the briefest moment, J’s fingers tightened—just barely—on her shoulder. Not enough to hurt. Just enough to be noticed.

 

And then she let go.

 

Uzi moved forward instantly, as if her limbs were finally released from invisible restraints. She stepped into the hall, her pace quick but not hurried—at least not outwardly.

 

V was already ahead, far enough that Uzi could no longer see her face, only the lazy swing of her walk as she turned the corner.

 

Uzi didn’t look back.

 

She didn’t need to. J had spoken volumes.

 

Whatever that was—whatever it meant—Uzi knew one thing for certain: it wasn’t a casual comment.

 

It was a warning. Quiet. Subtle. But unmistakable.

 

And no matter how vague it was… it sent a very clear message.

Notes:

Wowowoow

Finally stuff is happening again!!

I was thinking abt it, and like, throughout the whole fic so far, I think J had probably had like 5 lines 😭

If anything, N, V, and Uzi have talked abt her more then she’s talked herself

Ig she’ll speak more soon then though. My interpretation of her though is she thinks everything she says out - like, she would never say something without thinking, or blurt something out (like Uzi 💔 does sometimes)

I think I’ve mentioned it before but she’s js *super* calculated, and not dumb whatsoever. It’s as if she’s constantly trying to solve a puzzle even if they’re aren’t any pieces, if that makes sense

So wish Uzi good luck for having to share a room with her the next 5 days 😭😭 poor girl

And now Uzi’s stressing out abt whatever N needs to talk abt, if anything at all 💔

By now, I would’ve thought N learned that he shouldn’t be so vague when saying literally *anything* to Uzi. But I mean, honestly, he doesn’t overthink in the way Uzi does, so when he sent that message he probably didn’t think twice abt it. And now unbeknownst to him, Uzi is having a whole crisis abt how unintentionally vague he was 💔

That’s all I have to say abt the chapter. I have other news though!

I think i’m gonna start another fic soon. DW THOUGH the update schedule for this one is not gonna change at all 😭 I wouldn’t do that to yall

It’ll js kinda be a side project ig cuz I’ve been itching to write something new, while also continuing this one, if that makes sense

OK OK LEMME EXPLAINNN AHHH
I literally had the best idea. I’m gonna ramble for a minute so bear with me 💔

So basically, my like, top favorite-of-all-time fic/literally any kinda book genres are school (as in high school/college AU’s/stories ((in case u couldn’t tell 😭))) AND post-apocalyptic AU’s/stories.

I already have a fic planned out for when I finish this one (not gonna focus on it at all until then. I’ll js say, it’s gonna be an enemies to lovers college AU where the two characters absolutely hate each other and get stuck in a dorm room for a whole semester :3 not a MD fic though, sadly 🥲 if u know what TBHK is, it’s gonna be a mitsukou fic UGH I love them sm they’re so cute 😭😭)

BUT YEAH THAT’S NOT WHAT IM ABT TO TALK ABT- For the *actual* side project I’m gonna start soon - it’s gonna me another MD fic 😫 Basically, I want it to be a post-apocalyptic fic from Uzi’s perspective (duh- might have a POV change every now and then) Ik u might be like “but isn’t the actual story in MD post apocalyptic?” I mean yeah but HEAR ME OUT -

It’s gonna kinda be like this fic, in the way that instead of MD lore being relevant, the characters and js everything on copper-9 functions as a normal society. BUT there was some kind of apocalypse (as in virus, zombie apocalypse type shit ig) and then basically the plot is Uzi trying to survive after the outbreak

Oh yeah and it’ll also be another Nuzi fic cuz I can’t survive without them 💔

I need to work out all the details, as in like “was Uzi alive when the outbreak started, or was she born and raised years after the initial outbreak?” I’m going more for the first one
And also, idk if Disassembly drones will exist or not, if they do it’ll be kinda like this AU where they’re basically vampires, but I don’t really want them to be in that fic cuz I feel like it’ll be a repetitive idea, since it’s already in this fic. Hopefully that makes sense - N would js be a regular drone ig

I’D LOVE TO HEAR YALL’S THOUGHTS THOUGH FRRR that’d be great

I have a *very* basic idea for how that fic will go, I js haven’t written anything down.

Really random, but I daydream *a lot,* (like,, abt conversations I wanna have with someone as well as scenarios for stories I’m writing/wanna write- is that bad?? 😭 LMAO idc it makes me happy) but yeah basically I’ve been thinking abt this for the past few hours and I need to get this idea out of my head UGH 😫😫

Ok that’s pretty much all I have to say.

NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE POSTED TOMORROW!!! See ya’ll then 😖

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 70: Pinkies

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The elevator ride down dragged in that strange, stretched-out silence that only existed in cramped spaces—except it wasn’t silent. Not really.

 

Lizzy filled the air with a constant, high-energy monologue directed at V, venting about some guy who had apparently left her on read the other day. She was “so done” with him, but also “maybe not” if he apologized the right way. Uzi didn’t catch the whole saga—nor did she care to. The words passed by her like static. Pointless, cloying noise that barely scraped the surface of her thoughts.

 

She stood rigid in her corner, arms crossed, gaze fixed ahead on the elevator doors. There was a low hum in her chest—unease, maybe, or just the buildup of too many thoughts crowding each other for space.

 

But it wasn’t Lizzy’s dramatics that made her so tense.

 

It was J.

 

Standing just behind her. Close. Too close.

 

Uzi could feel it—the pressure of J’s stare pressing into the back of her neck like a phantom weight. She didn’t dare turn. Didn’t want to see what expression J might be wearing, or worse, confirm the suspicion that she was being watched.

 

She kept her eyes forward, her face blank, forcing herself not to react. She wasn’t going to give J that satisfaction.

 

Still, her body felt too aware—like every movement had to be calculated, every breath smoothed out so it wouldn’t tremble. Her thoughts circled back to earlier—J’s words, her grip, the glint in her voice. Whatever J was playing at, Uzi knew it wasn’t idle.

 

But she pushed the unease down. She had more pressing things to deal with.

 

Where was N?

 

That question took root in her mind like a slow pulse. He’d asked to meet—down here, in the lobby—but where exactly? She hadn’t thought to ask. She hadn’t wanted to seem… too eager.

 

She could go check where she’d been hanging out earlier, near Rebecca and Emily—maybe she should just check, maybe he’d be there… even though she knew he wouldn’t. That idea felt thin, like a convenient excuse she didn’t believe herself. She couldn’t ignore him. Not after he reached out first. Not after everything that happened on the bus.

 

Another wave of nerves rolled in, sharp and insistent. What was  he going to say? Why did he want to see her? Uzi didn’t think she’d done anything wrong, but doubt had a way of creeping in fast.

 

The elevator gave a soft ding, and the doors slid open. A rush of cool air from the lobby spilled in. The others moved forward—Lizzy still chattering, V slouching along silently—and Uzi followed, her legs stiff but moving.


Time to find out.

 

The second the elevator doors opened and J, V, and Lizzy stepped out, Uzi hung back—half a step, maybe, but enough to let a breath slip past her lips once J’s head didn’t turn.

 

Lizzy kept babbling, gesturing with animated flair as she launched into yet another story, and this time even J seemed mildly invested, or at least willing to pretend.

 

V gave Lizzy a side glance now and then, her face unreadable as ever. But not once did either of them glance back at Uzi.

 

Good.

 

That small mercy gave her just enough space to breathe.

 

She stepped out of the elevator last, immediately met with a wall of sound—voices layered on voices, students grouped together in clusters, a tide of noise and movement. The entire grade had regrouped in the lobby, a sea of buzzing conversation beneath the hotel’s high ceiling.

 

This was the orientation meeting the teachers had mentioned earlier, but now that she was down here, it felt more like a swarm.

 

Uzi didn’t waste time.

 

She dipped to the side, just out of the direct flow of foot traffic, and quickly pulled out her phone. Her fingers moved fast, tapping out a message before her nerves could catch up:

 

Uzi [11:07 AM]: hey wru?

 

No punctuation. No overthinking. Short. Controlled.

 

She hit send and barely had time to wonder if he’d see it before his response lit up her screen—almost instantly.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [11:07 AM] : I’m by the chairs on the right side of the crowd when you come out of the elevator.

 

Her heart thudded—fast, sharp. Of course he responded right away. Of course he was already expecting her.

 

She gave the message a quick thumbs-up, locking the screen and shoving the phone into her pocket before she could hesitate. Her palms felt clammy. Her thoughts were a mess—churning with questions, possibilities, fears she couldn’t even name properly.

 

Why did this feel like such a big deal?

 

She turned right.

 

There weren’t any chairs in sight at first. Just more students, teachers, backpacks on the floor, announcements being half-shouted from someone trying to organize the chaos. But she kept walking, hugging the edge of the crowd, scanning as she moved. Then, finally—just past the main lobby area—she saw them.

 

A set of chairs arranged around a low table, tucked into a side room that looked like the hotel’s breakfast area. Quiet, tucked away, dimmer lighting. A little haven from the noise.

 

And there he was.

 

N sat near the corner, elbows resting on his knees, phone cradled in his hands. He wasn’t scrolling, though—wasn’t typing, or even glancing around. He was just… staring down at the screen. Still. Focused. Like he was waiting for something to show up on the screen.

 

Was he… waiting for her to text him again?

 

The thought hit her like a flicker of static. Her steps slowed slightly as her nerves surged back up again. No way. He couldn’t really be staring at his phone, anticipating that she’d text him again. Right? She hadn’t kept him waiting that long. Maybe he was just thinking. Or zoning out. Probably.

 

Still, that image—him sitting there so still, alone in the corner, eyes on a message that might’ve been from her—lodged in her chest and wouldn’t budge.

 

Okay. Deep breath. She steeled herself and kept walking, heart climbing higher in her throat with every step.

 

The moment N looked up and spotted her approaching, his entire face lit up.

 

It wasn’t subtle.

 

His eyes brightened, and that unmistakably wide grin spread across his face—unguarded and honest, like her being there had just made his whole day. There was no hesitation in it, no restraint. Just… joy.

 

Uzi nearly broke right there.

 

She fought it, kept her face as composed as she could manage, but the corner of her mouth betrayed her—curling upward just barely, just long enough to answer his smile before she could stop it. It wasn’t much. Hardly noticeable. But still there. She scolded herself internally the second it happened.

 

N stood up from the chair, casually brushing imaginary dust from his sleeves before taking a few steps toward her.

 

Uzi looked up at him, her stomach twisting itself into knots. She had no idea what was about to happen or what he wanted. It didn’t feel dangerous—not at all—but that didn’t stop the nerves from crawling up her spine.

 

She tried to find her voice. “Um…” she began, almost regretting the words before they were out, “what… did you want to talk about?”

 

It came out weaker than she’d hoped—an awkward mix of curiosity and nerves that she immediately wanted to take back. Her tone was cautious, uncertain, and she hated how obvious it must have sounded. She stared up at him, fingers fidgeting with the edge of her jacket sleeve, cursing herself internally. Nice going, Uzi.

 

But N, to her surprise, didn’t even flinch.

 

He gave a small shrug, as if the question didn’t weigh much at all. “Oh. Nothing, really. I just wanted to see you.”

 

His tone was light—simple, easy. Like that answer made perfect sense.

 

Uzi blinked.

 

She didn’t move. Didn’t speak.

 

Her brain sputtered, as if it had short-circuited for a moment. She hadn’t expected that. Not even remotely. It was like… her entire system was trying to reboot in real time, parsing what he just said.

 

She blurted out the first word that slipped through the confusion: “What?”

 

That single word made N’s smile falter. Just slightly. His gaze flicked away, almost like he thought he’d done something wrong.

 

“Is that bad?” he asked, quieter now—tentative, maybe even a little embarrassed. His eyes didn’t meet hers.

 

That snapped Uzi back to reality.

 

Her hands shot up instinctively, waving in front of her. “No! No—no, it’s not bad,” she rushed to say, her voice shaky but sincere. “It’s just—” She hesitated, glancing at the ground for half a second before forcing herself to look at him again. “I wasn’t expecting that. That’s all.”

 

He looked back at her, still unsure. But his shoulders eased just a little.

 

And as Uzi stood there, a nervous flutter twisting through her chest, she realized something that made her even more anxious: she meant it. She hadn’t expected it. But she didn’t mind. Not even a little.

 

Uzi, desperate to steer away from the strange warmth bubbling in her chest and the crushing weight of her own overthinking, blurted the first thing that surfaced.

 

“Wanna go find the others?” she asked quickly, trying to keep her tone casual—like this was just a normal, boring thing to suggest. “I think I know where Rebecca and Emily are.”

 

N’s response was instant, without even a beat of hesitation. “Yeah! That sounds great.”

 

Of course it did. Because he was always like that—so open, so eager, so… him.

 

Uzi gave a quick, tight nod and forced herself to look away from him. Her eyes dropped to the floor tiles as they started walking side by side through the crowd, the buzz of chatter surrounding them like static.

 

She didn’t dare look at him again. She was worried that if she stared too long, her face would betray her. That dumb smile of his was still branded in her brain like a glitching neon sign.

 

Keep it together, she thought. Just keep walking.

 

She risked a small glance his way, only so she could point ahead. “They should be somewhere around here. Just… keep an eye out.”

 

Her voice was clipped, firm. Too firm, maybe. But it was the only way she knew to keep from spiraling.

 

N nodded, his tone light and unbothered. “Okay.”

 

That was it. No fuss. No questions. He was just content to walk beside her, not needing to fill the silence or press her for more. And somehow, that made it worse.

 

Uzi's thoughts buzzed louder than the crowd around them.

 

He just wanted to see her. That was what he said. Those exact words. Not ‘needed to ask something’ or ‘wanted to talk’—no. He just wanted to see her. Like she mattered. Like she was worth finding.

 

What did that even mean?! Was that normal? Was he just being… friendly? No. No, it wasn’t normal. Not for her. Not for anyone she knew. Not the way he said it. Not the way it made her feel.

 

She dug the nails of her hand into her palm, trying to ground herself—force herself to stop spiraling. But her mind wouldn’t quit.

 

Was it weird that she liked it? The idea that someone was thinking about her when she wasn’t around? That someone cared enough to seek her out?

 

It wasn’t just weird. It was terrifying.

 

She felt like she was slowly losing control over her own thoughts, like she was internally overheating from emotions she wasn’t designed to run.

 

Just stop thinking.


Please, stop thinking.

 

She stared ahead, willing her expression to stay neutral. But every step she took beside N made that flutter in her chest more impossible to ignore.

 

Then, without warning—Their hands accidentally brushed. Just barely. It was just a small touch, a light graze, but it sent a jolt through Uzi like static across her wires. The sensation lingered in her mind far longer than it should have.

 

It wasn’t that unusual. Drones brushed hands when walking close together all the time. It had happened with Rebecca or Emily before—usually ending in a quick laugh or a step to the side. No big deal. Just friends bumping into each other. But this…

 

This wasn’t the same. Because it was N.

 

And N… wasn’t just a friend.

 

Or—what? He was!  Yeah, He was just a friend! What the hell was she on about?! That was the truth, right? That’s what she’d been telling herself… But this simple brush of skin suddenly made that truth feel a lot more complicated.

 

She looked at him. He looked back.

 

Their eyes met—brief, sharp, electric. Like the space between them had just changed. Neither said anything. Neither smiled. But they both turned away at the same time, as if it was too much to hold eye contact for longer than a second.

 

Uzi’s mind was a storm. She didn’t want to feel this way—she wasn’t supposed to. This wasn’t something she asked for. But still, that brief, fleeting moment… it left something behind.

 

And then—again.

 

Their hands brushed again.

 

Only this time, it wasn’t accidental.

 

It was soft, hesitant… intentional.

 

His pinky.

 

His pinky curled ever so slightly around hers.

 

Not his whole hand. Not a full grip. Just… the smallest part of him reaching for the smallest part of her. Quiet, almost imperceptible. But so devastatingly intentional that it nearly stopped her in her tracks.

 

It would’ve been easier if he had just grabbed her hand outright. If he’d made it obvious. At least then she’d know what to do—pull away or hold on. Make a choice.

 

But this? This whisper of a touch?

 

It was worse. Because it left everything open.

 

Because it said everything without saying a word.

 

Her circuits felt scrambled. Her steps faltered, just slightly. Just thinking about her pinky, now wrapped in his, made her mind buzz with too many emotions at once.

 

He wanted to hold her hand.

 

He wanted to hold her hand.

 

And somehow, the smallest touch felt louder than anything he could’ve said.

 

Uzi glanced up at him sharply, her internal wiring sparking with confusion and a flicker of disbelief. He was looking back at her—not embarrassed, not smug, but with that same gentle, strangely earnest expression that always made her feel like she was malfunctioning a little.

 

She hadn’t let go yet. She didn’t know why.

 

Their steps slowed as the tension between them grew heavier, like a pressure in the air neither of them could ignore.

 

N seemed to feel it too. He hesitated, his voice soft and almost unsure as he asked, “Is this… okay?”

 

Uzi’s gaze dropped. Her mind scrambled for an answer, any answer that wouldn’t sound as clumsy as her thoughts felt. “I… I don’t know,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. Her stomach twisted, her thoughts a mess of alarms and flickering static. “What if someone sees?” she murmured, flicking her eyes around.

 

The crowd wasn’t far off—someone could notice.

 

She started to pull away, slowly, hesitantly. Like every movement was a silent question.

 

But then—N’s pinkie curled tighter.

 

“Wait,” he said gently.

 

And she froze. Her whole body stilled, her throat tightening as though her voice had been caught somewhere mid-process. Why was he being like this? Why did it matter so much ?

 

Then N leaned in just slightly, just enough for his voice to reach her without anyone else hearing. “If we stand close enough,” he murmured, “no one will notice.”

 

Her thoughts spiraled. This wasn’t just risky—it was reckless. She didn’t even know what she wanted , let alone how to feel about all this. Why did this feel like such a monumental decision when it was just their two pinkies holding? Why did it make her heart stutter in her chest?

 

Before she could untangle any of those thoughts, she found herself blurting, “Why do you even wanna—”

 

But she didn’t finish. She didn’t have to.

 

N looked away, and a faint twinge of something—maybe regret—crossed his face. “Sorry,” he said quickly and apologetically, scratching the back of his neck. “That was weird. I’ll stop.” But before Uzi could reply, she heard him add under his breath, “I just… didn’t want to let go.”

 

Her breath hitched.

 

She didn’t know what possessed her to speak next, but somehow, she found the words. “It’s okay,” she said softly.

 

N looked at her again, hopeful now. Like he wasn’t sure he’d heard her right.

 

“You’re sure?” he asked, voice careful, cautious.

 

Uzi nodded slowly. “Yeah.”

 

And she held his pinkie just a little tighter.

 

They didn’t speak after that. No words, no need. Just the quiet rhythm of their steps and the subtle, hidden link between their hands, as if the whole world had shrunk down to that one small touch neither of them was ready to break.

 

The crowd felt like a maze, voices and movement folding in around Uzi from every direction. But through all of it, her focus was razor-sharp—on her steps, on the weight of her shoulder brushing N’s, and most of all… on their linked pinkies.

 

Her entire body was tense, mind on overdrive. With every breath, she was waiting for something to go wrong. For someone to glance their way. For someone to notice.

 

But no one did.

 

She scanned the faces as they passed—students laughing, chatting, barely paying attention to anyone beyond their own circles. Not a single look cast their way.

 

It should’ve made her feel better.

 

But it didn’t.

 

Not really. Because it didn’t change the fact that she felt like she was balancing on a wire stretched tight—one wrong step, one glance from the wrong drone, and everything could come crashing down.

 

And yet… she didn’t let go.

 

They drifted slightly apart at one point, the tide of the crowd naturally pulling them a step away from each other—and Uzi instantly closed the distance. Her shoulder bumped softly against N’s, a quiet reassurance to herself that he was still there, still close.

 

She didn’t look at him. She didn’t have to. She could feel the warmth radiating from him like a quiet beacon.

 

She risked a glance downward, and her face flushed with heat. Their hands still looked—mercifully—discreet. Just pinkies hooked. It was subtle enough that it might pass as nothing. Just two drones walking close together. Too close, maybe… but not enough to cause a scene. Unless someone really cared to look.

 

She tried not to think about it.

 

Tried not to think about the fact that it was him. That it was N , and not just anyone. Because that made it harder to focus, harder to breathe.

 

He had this effect on her—this relentless, frustrating, achingly  sweet way of being that made her feel like her entire processor was overheating.

 

Then, without warning, she felt it: a soft, double squeeze around her pinkie.

 

Her eyes snapped up to him, heart skipping.

 

He didn’t say a word.

 

He just… smiled.

 

Still not in a smug or teasing way—but open, sincere. Like this —just being here with her—was enough.

 

Uzi’s chest twisted painfully. She quickly looked away, blinking hard. She didn’t want to smile. She couldn’t. But she could feel it tugging at her anyway. This was killing her. Every second of it. The warmth of his smile, the simplicity of it all… it made her stomach hurt. Not in a bad way.

 

Just in a way that made it very, very hard to think straight.

 

The silence was starting to press in, so Uzi forced herself to speak—anything to distract from the warm knot of nerves twisting in her chest. She spoke up, trying her hardest to sound casual.

 

“Hey—…Do you see Rebecca or Emily anywhere?” She didn’t mean to stammer, but the words caught in her throat anyway, and her voice wavered just slightly.

 

She immediately winced at herself. Smooth.  Very smooth.

 

N didn’t seem to notice—or if he did, he didn’t say anything. He scanned the crowd with ease, standing a little straighter beside her.

 

Being taller gave him the advantage, of course, and he hummed thoughtfully, eyes sweeping across the room before he lifted a hand and pointed. “Over there,” he said with a soft certainty.

 

Uzi followed the line of his finger. And sure enough, there they were—Rebecca and Emily, chatting near a corner wall. Thad and Darren were with them too, standing nearby, talking amongst themselves.

 

The sight brought an odd sort of relief to her chest. Not because she was eager to rejoin the group, but because now… this—whatever this had been—was finally over.

 

She could’ve ended it earlier. Should’ve, probably. Just let go, tell him she wasn’t comfortable. Pretend she didn’t like it.

 

She knew how to lie.

 

But when it came to him , it was like her instincts just… short-circuited.

 

Because she hadn’t wanted to stop. Not really.

 

And that scared her more than anything.

 

They reached the group, and the hum of conversation surrounded her like a familiar blanket.

 

As they drew closer, Uzi slowly let her pinkie slip free from N’s. The contact broke so gently, yet she still felt it linger—a phantom warmth that refused to leave.

 

N didn’t say anything. Neither did she.

 

Instead, she stepped forward to greet the others, trying to steady her expression. Trying to be normal.

 

Her gaze darted over to Rebecca, then Emily—Thad and Darren were there now, too. None of them looked like they’d noticed anything strange.

 

Good.

 

She let herself breathe.

 

But even as she joined the circle, the spot on her hand where his had been still pulsed faintly—like a secret only she knew how to feel.

Notes:

I’m posting this like very last minute, I’ve been busy all day 😭

But I promised I would post so like, here I am ig 🫡

Next chapter will be posted either Friday or Saturday. Saturday at the absolute latest!!!

See yall then 😖

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 71: Short

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

As Uzi and N approached the group, the chatter dimmed just enough for a few quick greetings to be exchanged.

 

“Hey!” Rebecca said with a short wave, shifting slightly to make room.

 

Emily smiled. “We were wondering where you went.”

 

Thad added with mock seriousness, “Yeah, we were about to send out a search party. Thought you got kidnapped or something.”

 

Uzi snorted, rolling her eyes. “Honestly? I wish. Would’ve been a welcome escape from this stupid field trip.”

 

Darren let out a bark of laughter. “Jeez, we got a real negative Nancy over here.”

 

Uzi shot him a glare, ready to snap back—but Rebecca beat her to it, smirking slyly. “Can you blame her? I’d be a negative Nancy too if I had to share a room with Lizzy for five days straight.”

 

That earned a loud oof from Darren, who winced dramatically and turned to Uzi with sympathy. “Ouch. Yeah, that sucks. You have my deepest condolences.”

 

Uzi sighed and crossed her arms, her tone flat. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll survive… probably.”

 

She didn’t bother hiding the sarcastic edge to her voice, but deep down, it was almost nice to fall back into this rhythm. Banter. Familiar, safe territory. It helped shake off some of the tension still clinging to her from earlier.

 

Then N spoke up, his voice mild but curious. “Do any of you know when orientation’s supposed to start?”

 

Emily glanced toward the front of the lobby area and shrugged, arms loosely crossed. “Should be any minute now. Hopefully.”

 

Uzi watched N quietly as he nodded at Emily’s answer, then shifted slightly beside her. His expression was relaxed, but she still felt a thread of electricity between them—faint, invisible, but there. The kind that didn’t quite leave you even after the moment had passed.

 

She folded her arms a little tighter, as if that would ground her. If anything, it only reminded her how warm her pinky still felt.

 

Thad stretched his arms behind his head and casually asked, “So… who’d you all get roomed with?”

 

The question landed harmlessly at first—until Uzi felt her shoulders tense. She didn’t realize how much she was dreading it until now. N didn’t know. About her room. About J.  Her throat tightened just thinking about having to say it aloud.

 

Would he react weirdly? Would he worry? Would he actually say something in front of everyone?

 

Luckily, Emily jumped in before Uzi had to speak. She elbowed Rebecca with a grin and said, “Me and her are together.”

 

Rebecca’s smile was soft and pleased. “Yeah, I’m honestly so happy about it.”

 

“Me too, girl,” Emily replied, with an affectionate little bump of her shoulder against Rebecca’s. Then she turned toward Thad again. “We’re also with Doll and Amda.”

 

Uzi tuned out of the conversation for a beat, her eyes flicking downward while her mind wandered. She didn’t know who Amda was, but the mention of Doll pulled her attention.

 

Doll. That name was familiar.

 

She’d met her before—when V had forced her to sit at her table at lunch one day. Other than that, she only saw Doll a few other times—mostly in passing, usually attached to V or Lizzy, or just their friend group in general. She always hovered at the edge of that group. Quiet. Distant.

 

Uzi only actually talked to her once—maybe twice—and both times Doll barely spoke. And when she did, it wasn’t in English. Uzi was almost sure she’d only ever heard Doll speak in Russian.

 

That had stuck with her, oddly. Not in a bad way. More in a curious one. What was Doll like when you actually talked to her? When she wasn’t just a background figure standing silently beside chaos?

 

She blinked, her thoughts cut off by Emily’s voice. She continued speaking to Thad, “Do you know them?” she asked, referring to Amda and Doll.

 

Thad gave a half-hearted shrug. “Never heard of Amda,” he said, brows knitting briefly as if trying to recall a face and coming up empty. “But… Doll—is that the one girl who only speaks Russian?”

 

Emily nodded. “Yeah, that’s her.”

 

At that, Thad visibly tensed, crossing his arms with a skeptical look. “She creeps me out. Seriously. Gives me the heebie-jeebies.”

 

Emily gave him an unimpressed look, arms loosely folded. “She’s actually really nice if you, like, talk  to her,” she said with a pointed tone. Then, after a beat, she added more sheepishly, “I mean—I don’t know what she’s saying, but I pretend I do.”

 

Thad snorted and shook his head, clearly entertained. “You would.”

 

Uzi watched the exchange silently, still stewing over her own thoughts. She wasn’t even fully present—just riding the edges of the conversation, trying not to think about what was coming next. The idea of saying J’s name out loud felt like dangling raw meat in front of a tiger.

 

Darren cut in, rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t know anyone in my room,” he admitted. “Like, at all. I don’t even remember their names.”

 

Thad laughed, clapping a hand over his mouth like he couldn’t believe it. “Seriously?”

 

Darren shot him a glare. “Hey, if you were stuck with three random guys you’ve never seen in your life, you wouldn’t remember either.”

 

Thad gave a mischievous little shrug and glanced away. “Well, I’m not , so I guess we’ll never know.”

 

Darren scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Yeah, whatever.”

 

The back-and-forth was lighthearted, giving Uzi a brief moment of relief from her swirling anxiety. But the moment was short-lived.

 

Her turn to speak was getting closer—and she knew she couldn’t dodge it much longer. Her fingers curled slightly at her sides, and her gaze flicked subtly toward N.

 

Did she really have to say it out loud?

 

Thad, clearly not finished with his little show, shot Darren a smug side glance. “Unlike some drones,” he drawled, tone teasing, “I actually know all my roommates.”

 

Darren, unfazed, just rolled his eyes and folded his arms, choosing not to dignify that with a response. He looked off into the distance with a face that said I’m not doing this right now.

 

With a flourish, Thad gestured toward N. “N here is one of ‘em.”

 

N gave a small grin, lifting a hand in a sheepish wave. “Guilty.”

 

His relaxed, casual demeanor made it almost hard to imagine he was the same drone who’d nervously linked his pinkie with hers not even five minutes ago. Uzi kept her expression neutral, but she could still feel the lingering warmth in her chest from earlier.

 

Thad continued, ticking off the rest. “The other two are Braidon and Sam.”

 

The moment those names left his mouth, Uzi hissed through her teeth and recoiled, as if she had touched a hot stove, “Yikes,” she muttered. “I actually feel bad for you.”

 

Thad raised a brow, half amused. “ You feel bad for me? That’s gotta be a first.”

 

Uzi shrugged with mock sympathy, arms crossed. “Yeah, that should tell you how bad it is.”

 

Thad snorted. “What, you don’t like them? Braidon and Sam seem pretty chill to me.”

 

Uzi raised a finger. “First of all—Braidon? I’ve talked to that guy, like, four or five times now. Four or five!  And every single time he acts like we’ve never met. Just stares at me like, ‘oh hey, what’s your name again?’ It’s like—am I that forgettable?”

 

She was only half joking. Okay, maybe one-third.

 

Thad laughed immediately. “That definitely sounds like him.” He tapped his chin, thinking. “But to be fair… you’re not exactly the most outgoing drone.”

 

Uzi’s mouth opened, ready to fire back—until she paused. Her brow furrowed slightly. As much as she hated to admit it, he wasn’t wrong. Begrudgingly, she shut her mouth and let the retort die in her throat.

 

Instead, she just muttered, “Whatever,” and looked off to the side, chewing the inside of her cheek.

 

She still didn’t like Braidon.

 

Uzi exhaled sharply, her irritation reigniting. “Anyway,” she continued with a pointed look, “then there’s Sam .”

 

Thad raised a brow, tilting his head slightly, interest piqued. He was clearly enjoying her rant a little too much.

 

Uzi threw up her hands a bit. “Look, I get that he’s chill  or whatever. But that’s because he’s always on something. I seriously don’t even want to know how many drugs he cycles through in a day.”

 

Thad laughed under his breath, shaking his head. “Okay, I mean… I can’t even argue. You’re kinda right—for once.”

 

Uzi shot him a sharp glare. “Hey!” she snapped, voice defensive, though not without the hint of a sarcastic bite. Her arms crossed tightly across her chest, brows drawn low.

 

Then Darren jumped in, far too casually for her liking. “Wait—wasn’t Sam the one who gave N that weed brownie at the party?”

 

Uzi froze. Her glare immediately shifted to Darren, sharper now, more personal. Seriously?  Out of all the things to bring up right now, that was what he chose?

 

Her insides twisted. She didn’t even want to mention the party. She’d tried not to think about it—about what had happened when N, in all his naive sweetness, had eaten that brownie thinking it was just dessert. And then all of the events that followed… That night had left her a mess of conflicted feelings, ones she still hadn’t entirely sorted out. She clenched her jaw.

 

She wanted to snap at Darren. Hard. But the second the impulse struck, so did the realization— wouldn’t that be weird? Wouldn’t it raise questions if she suddenly got super defensive over N? Why would she care so much, unless…

 

No. She forced the thoughts to shut down.

 

Uzi let out a dry breath, arms still folded tight. Her voice came out cooler, more composed. “Yeah,” she muttered, nodding once. “Probably.” She purposely made her words short, hoping that the topic would change.

 

Even so, Uzi tried to keep her expression neutral, tried not to let the tightness in her chest show. But her eyes flicked to N before she could stop herself.

 

He looked… uncomfortable. Embarrassed, even. His shoulders were slightly hunched, his gaze fixed downward, as if he wanted to shrink out of the conversation entirely. And it made something flare in her chest again—hot and defensive and protective. Why the hell was Darren doing this?  That wasn’t his story to bring up. And especially not that story.

 

She could feel the group's attention start to tilt toward N—eyes subtly drifting in his direction, as if waiting for him to confirm or deny what Darren had said. The air grew a little heavier with expectation. And of course, N—being N—spoke up, even if he clearly didn’t want to.

 

“Yeah, I… think it was Sam,” he admitted, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly.

 

Darren grinned like he’d just won something. “Dude, you were so stoned that you don’t even remember, do you?” he teased, his tone smug and too loud.

 

N gave a sheepish shake of his head, lips pulling into a tight, embarrassed line. He glanced away again, avoiding eye contact, his fingers fidgeting slightly at his side.

 

Darren laughed at that, thoroughly entertained. “I still think it’s hilarious how you accidentally did that.”

 

And then Thad joined in, nudging N’s shoulder with a poorly stifled grin. “Cheer up, man. Everyone makes a few dumb calls. Builds character.”

 

N tried to laugh, but it came out weak and strained. Uzi could see right through it. His eyes didn’t crinkle. There was no real smile behind it. Just discomfort wearing a mask.

 

Her jaw clenched. Her fingers curled into her crossed arms. This was exactly why she hadn’t bought it up at the mention of Sam— they didn’t know what had really happened, what N had been like. And they were turning it into some kind of dumb inside joke. He hadn’t even known it was laced. That stupid brownie… that stupid party…

 

She was about to say something, maybe bite back with something cutting, but—

 

“So, who’re you  roomed with again?” Rebecca asked suddenly, turning toward her, completely unbothered.

 

And just like that, Uzi’s anger dropped out of her like a weight, replaced instantly by a creeping dread. Her stomach flipped.


Oh no.

 

Now  she had to say it. Out loud. In front of him .

 

Uzi could feel it coming—her nerves creeping up her spine like a slow, icy crawl. Her fingers twitched slightly by her sides, the instinct to fidget tugging at her, but she forced them into her pockets instead. Her eyes threatened to flick down, to look away, to betray how tense she really felt. But she couldn’t let that happen. Not now.

 

None.  of them knew. Not Thad, not Darren, not Emily or Rebecca. None of them had the faintest idea what it meant that J was her roommate.

 

They didn’t know what J really was—what any  of them were. No one was supposed to know what Disassembly drones exist. And no one was supposed to know who actually was one. But Uzi did. That alone put her in danger.

 

If J ever found out that Uzi knew her secret… it wouldn’t matter that they shared a room. J wouldn’t hesitate.

 

That weight hung on her chest like a vice. Still, she drew in a shallow breath, silently straightening her posture, sharpening her features. She didn’t let her voice waver as she responded, casual and cool:

 

“Lizzy, obviously,” she said with a small shrug, “and… V. And J.”

 

The names came out smoother than she expected. Her face remained still. But she couldn't stop herself from glancing at N the second she finished.

 

And what she saw hit her like a punch to the gut.

 

His face had gone pale—figuratively, at least. His body seemed to freeze mid-breath, eyes widening just a fraction too much. There was something unmistakably sharp and terrified in his expression. It was like she’d said something forbidden. Something dangerous. And he knew it.

 

But before she could react to his look—before the weight of what she’d just said fully settled—Rebecca’s voice cut in.

 

“Oh, good luck with that,” she said, flatly but not unkindly, her brows lifted in mild disbelief. “I mean—Lizzy’s bad enough, but V and J too? That’s brutal.”

 

Emily made a face and shook her head. “Yeah, no. Uzi, if you need somewhere to escape to, you’re so  welcome in our room.”

 

Uzi let out a long, theatrical sigh, dropping her head slightly. Her mask of confidence slipped for just a moment as she muttered, “Please. That’d be great.”

 

Rebecca chuckled in agreement while Emily gave her a sympathetic little pat on the arm.


And even though their concern was real, Uzi knew they didn’t understand the
real reason she looked exhausted at just the mention of her roommates. They probably just thought V was a jerk and J was stuck-up.

 

But Uzi wasn’t afraid of a bad attitude.

 

She was afraid of a drone who could rip her apart without blinking.

 

And the only other drone here who really understood that—was still standing there, dead silent.

 

Thad leaned forward slightly, curiosity written all over his face as he turned to Rebecca. “I knew you didn’t like Lizzy,” he said, brows raised, “but you don’t like V and J either?”

 

Rebecca shrugged, folding her arms with a casual air. “Yes and no,” she replied, her tone thoughtful. “I don’t dislike V, not really. I actually think she’s kinda cool. She’s just… kind of a jerk. But not in the obvious way, you know? She’s one of those drones who gets away with it because everyone still likes her.”

 

Thad scratched the back of his head, frowning faintly as he processed that. “Yeah… I guess that makes sense.”

 

Rebecca nodded, then added, “But J? No, I seriously can’t stand her. She’s like V, but worse. Take V, crank up the attitude, make her a teacher’s pet, and toss in a superiority complex she never says out loud but definitely shoves in your face anyway. That’s J.”

 

Thad gave a low whistle, nodding along. “Yeah, putting it that way... that actually explains a lot.”

 

Then Emily spoke up, her voice softer than before. “Also… J used to kind of bully me.”

 

Uzi blinked and turned toward her, eyes narrowing in surprise. “Wait—really?”

 

Emily nodded with a small, sheepish smile, though it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Yeah. Back in middle school. She used to make fun of my faith a lot… and my appearance.” She shrugged, trying to brush it off. “It really got to me at the time. But it’s fine. I think she only did it because I had better grades than her.”

 

A bitter scoff escaped Uzi before she could help it. “Seriously? That’s just pathetic.”

 

Internally, though, she felt a swell of emotions—frustration, sympathy, and a deepened sense of loathing for J. What was wrong with her? Picking on someone like Emily, mocking something as personal as her beliefs? Why was J such absolute asshole?!

 

And more pressingly… how  was Uzi supposed to survive five days sharing a room with someone like that?

 

Her fists clenched slightly in her pockets, but she didn’t say anything else. Not yet.

 

Before anyone else could get a word in, a sharp voice rang out above the hum of conversation.

 

“Attention everyone!”

 

The sudden shout cut through the air, drawing the group's attention—and the attention of most drones scattered throughout the lodge's lobby. Uzi glanced toward the sound, already guessing it had to be one of the trip staff. Sure enough, near the reception desk, a middle-aged drone stood waving his arms like a frantic traffic conductor, trying to corral everyone’s focus. More staff flanked him, weaving through the crowd and attempting to shush clusters of still-chattering students.

 

Uzi tried to catch a proper glimpse of what was going on, but… yeah, no. That wasn’t happening. She barely saw the tops of other drones’ heads, much less whatever was actually going on. She frowned and sighed through her nose.

 

Then her gaze flicked up to N, standing quietly beside her.

 

He was tall. Taller than her. Taller than most of the group, actually.

 

So, Uzi made a decision.

 

She inched a little closer to him, elbow brushing his lightly, and gave him a small poke in the arm to catch his attention.

 

He turned to her immediately, a soft, bright smile blooming on his face the moment their eyes met.

 

That look made something twist in her chest—not unpleasantly, but annoyingly noticeable. She pushed it down with a blink and straightened her tone.

 

“Hey,” she said, as matter-of-factly as she could. “You’re tall. I can’t see anything. Mind narrating?”

 

N blinked once, then let out a small, amused laugh—not loud, not teasing. Just… warm. Like he genuinely found the situation funny, but not her. “Yeah, of course,” he said, smiling still.

 

He turned his head toward the crowd, eyes scanning with a little squint. “Uh… okay, the guy shouting is waving his arms around. Pretty sure he’s the field trip guide. And there’s a couple staff next to him trying to quiet everyone down—but like, it’s not really working. At all.”

 

Uzi nodded, expression neutral, but her mind was a little less composed.

 

That was… weird.

 

No sarcastic comment? No jab at her height? Not even a joking “short stuff” or something? She hadn't wanted  that, obviously—that’s exactly why she didn’t ask Darren or, Robo-god forbid, Thad for help. The teasing would've been insufferable. But N… just helped. No strings attached.

 

He didn’t make her feel small. Literally or otherwise.

 

And maybe that was what unsettled her the most. Because she didn’t know whether she liked how that made her feel—or hated that it made her feel anything at all.

 

The crowd eventually settled—though not into perfect silence. Just quiet enough for the staff drone at the front to be heard. Uzi shifted her weight and crossed her arms as the guide raised his voice above the last trailing murmurs.

 

“Well, now that I’ve got your attention—how’s everyone feeling? Ready to kick this trip off right?”

 

A wave of enthusiastic cheers erupted across the lobby. Some drones even whistled or whooped. Uzi, unfazed, rolled her eyes and buried her hands in her jacket pockets.

 

Still, her eyes flicked toward N.

 

He was clapping. Not loudly, but enough to show he was engaged. Polite, of course. Cheerful in his usual way. The tiny smile on his face was honest—endearing in a way she didn’t expect. Uzi felt the corner of her own mouth twitch upward, despite herself.

 

The staff member continued once the cheering died down.

 

“Alright, listen up,” he called, voice projecting with practiced authority. “Before we let you all scatter, I want to go over what the next five days are going to look like—especially for those of you who conveniently missed the email.”

 

Uzi raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. Guilty. She couldn’t remember if she’d ignored it or just never got it, but either way, she hadn’t bothered to read it. And now she was standing here without a clue what she’d signed up for. Fantastic.

 

The man kept going, pulling a paper from his clipboard. “So here’s how it’s going to work. After this meeting, head over to any of the staff around the lobby to get your name tag and a packet. That packet includes everything you’ll need for your trip assignment.”

 

At the word assignment, the energy in the room dipped just slightly.

 

And before you even think about slacking,” he added, “let me make this clear—it’s a major grade for more than one class. This could affect your GPA depending on how you do. So take it seriously.”

 

Uzi groaned quietly under her breath. Great. She thought this was supposed to be some kind of break from school, not another giant homework excuse in disguise.

 

The guide continued, undeterred. “Now, for today: you’ve got about an hour to finish unpacking and settle into your rooms. After that, lunch is up to you. You can head out wherever you’d like, just be back here by 2:00 sharp. Dinner will be provided here at the hotel in the dining hall.”

 

He gave a small clap of his hands to punctuate the point. “And remember—any extra time you have should be spent working on your assignments. We’ll be checking.”

 

Uzi sighed again, dragging a hand down her face. She didn’t even know what the assignment was yet, and she already hated it. Five days of constant monitoring, stress over grades, and pretending like she wasn't in mortal danger every time she walked into her room?

 

Yeah. This was going to be so  fun.

 

He had just started to move on—“As for the next few days, tomorrow everyone will be…”—when Uzi’s view and hearing was suddenly and completely blocked.

 

A tall drone stumbled backward, laughing as his friend gave him a firm push in the back. He collided into place right in front of her. Clearly, the two of them and their little group were just horsing around, teasing and shoving each other like rowdy boys do.

 

But to Uzi? It was infuriating. The guy’s back was a wall of fabric and loud snickering, and now she could see nothing.

 

She blinked in disbelief, then leaned slightly to the left. Then the right. Still blocked.

 

“Seriously?” she muttered under her breath, sighing audibly.

 

She glanced up at N beside her—he was still listening intently, nodding faintly now and then as if trying to commit the guide’s words to memory. Totally focused. Meanwhile, she was stuck in visual purgatory, getting none of it.

 

A low groan of frustration escaped her as she gave in and reached up, lightly tugging on N’s sleeve.

 

He turned almost instantly, eyes flicking down to her with soft curiosity. “Hm? What’s up?”

 

She gave a short nod toward the tall drone in front of her, her expression blank but her tone dry. “Him.  I can’t see. Or hear anything now.”

 

N looked past her and immediately seemed to understand. His expression softened with sympathy. “Oh. Uh—want me to ask him to move?”

 

Uzi’s face contorted with instant horror. “No way,” she said quickly, shaking her head. “That’s embarrassing.”

 

N tilted his head a little and hummed, clearly thinking. Then he offered, “Alright. I’ll just fill you in after this. I’m paying attention.”

 

He paused, then gave her a small, reassuring nudge to the shoulder. “Don’t worry about it.”

 

His voice was kind—genuinely kind—and the gesture had been so simple. But it left a weird feeling in Uzi’s chest. Something heavy. Unfamiliar.

 

Almost without thinking, she reached up with her other hand and pressed it gently over the place where he had nudged her, as if trying to process what had just happened—ground herself in the moment.

 

But then she saw it—just a flicker—N’s brows pulled together, the smile dimming slightly in a brief flash of concern.

 

Did… did he think she was bothered? Or weirded out? Or something?

 

Uzi quickly snapped out of it and dropped her hand to her side, breaking eye contact. She stared at the ground instead and muttered awkwardly, “Yeah. Uh. Sounds good.”

 

She wasn’t sure he even heard her, but he gave a soft, absentminded nod and turned his attention back to the guide, tuning in once again to the announcements.

 

Uzi exhaled quietly and kept her eyes on the floor, her thoughts spiraling.

 

Why did a simple nudge make her react like that? 

 

And worse—why did his concern actually make her feel… something?

 

And even worse, worst of all—now she had to stand here for who knows how long, next to N, while the field-trip-guide-whatever was speaking about the only useful information pertaining to this trip she needed to know—but she couldn’t hear a single thing he was saying.

 

How did she always end up in these kind of situations?

Notes:

Ok so I’m finally editing the authors notes 💔

Abt this chapter - I really enjoyed writing dialogue between the whole group again. It’s been a few chapters since the last time *all* of them talked together, so this was fun

I think the next chapter is gonna be kinda dialogue heavy-ish too. I’m not gonna say why but you’ll see what I mean when I post it

Another thing- honestly I couldn’t figure out how to end this chapter. I wanted to end it with the staff dude being done talking, and then N fills Uzi in on everything, but I felt like that would’ve dragged on the chapter too long and I have a way better idea anyways on how to start the next chapter

Idk if anyone was wondering this, but ‘how does Uzi not hear anything js cuz some dude got in front of her? If she could hear the speaker before, why would that change things?’ Well, I’m gonna assume that her and the group were at a far enough distance where it was already kinda hard to hear the guy, and like he doesn’t have a microphone or anything he’s js talking loud. So, not only did Uzi already have trouble seeing over the crowd, but she also could barely hear the guy, and then some tall dude stands directly in front of her, but she’s too embarrassed to ask him to move 💔

The reason that’s probably embarrassing to her though is cuz of like, her overthinking and social anxiety. This is some random dude she doesn’t know, and even though she’s pissed off she’s probably thinking like ‘what if he looks at me weird or says something because I ask him to move?’ And then she overthinks it more 😭

One more thing, there was a bunch of typos (mostly double spaces) so I went back and fixed all of them hopefully. If there’s any more though feel free to tell me abt it, it bothers me js as much as anyone else 🫟

Next chapter will be posted either Tuesday or Wednesday, just to let yall know. I think this one is gonna be a good one!

See u guys then!

Edit: OMG AND ALSO SUPER RANDOM BUT DID YALL SEE THE STUFF GLITCH POSTED LIKE TODAY AND THE OTHER DAY ON INSTA ?!!? And also whatever other platforms they’re on- OMG I ALMOST SHIT MYSELF like Uzi and N having a camping date?!! AWW THEYRE SO CUTE And literally 5 minutes ago as I’m editing this they posted a new thing where V is talking abt stuff to bring when ur camping and N is trying to get her attention the whole time 😭😭 OH AND ALSO LIKE The art they posted?!! Like with N taking a selfie LMAO I actually love it sm. OH and back to the camping date thing, THE PART WHEN V CALLS N AND UZI CRINGE LMFAOOO HELP and then N and Uzi’s whole song what?? And the fact that all of this was to advertise their merch? I love glitches marketing department it’s literally amazing

I actually love murder drones content I wish there was more 🥲 Unpopular opinion but I not one of those people who beg for a season 2 cuz I don’t see a need for it. Yeah, it’d be fun ig, and there are some plot holes they could fill, but at the end of the show it’s literally just everyone got a happy ending (except for like, Doll 💔) and that’s that. The solver is defeated so like they would have to make a whole new antagonist? Like what? And as much as I’d love to see wholesome murder drones content, if it was entirely js the characters living it up or wtv (since again they got a good ending and there’s no antagonist) even though I’d watch it all it’d get kinda boring - in the sense that there’s nothing else being added other than more detailed accounts of what we already know happened after the show ended (again, js the characters living it up 😭)

Plus I’m pretty satisfied because in the bio of the video of absolute end, it literally says they (glitch productions) want to make more MD content and stuff but js not a season 2. They’ve delivered so far, mostly js in merch advertisements (literally all of it is merch advertisements 😭 not complaining though) And also art and stuff too. But who knows, maybe we’ll get a short episode kinda thing or som if we wait long enough. Literally exactly like the thing they js posted but actually animated and not with plushies, and not an advertisement 💔 UGH I would actually explode because I’d be so happy

Ok I’ll stop rambling now. I’m starting to hyperfixate on MD, I can feel it 😭 surprisingly I wasn’t when I started this fic, but the more I write the worse it gets 💔 but idrc I’m happy and that’s what matters LMAO

BYE 🫟

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 72: Narration

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi walked alongside the group, her boots scuffing faintly against the polished tile as she turned over the folded paper in her hand. Her name tag hung loosely from a lanyard around her neck—it was flipped on the wrong side, but she couldn’t bring herself to care.

 

In her other hand, the printed project assignment felt heavier than it should’ve. She hadn’t even read it yet and already hated it.

 

Beside her, Thad looked like he’d just been handed a death sentence. His grip on the paper was tight—creased and crumpling at the edges. He glared down at it like it had personally insulted him.

 

“Gonna be honest,” he muttered, voice flat and irritated. “It’s taking everything in me not to rip this stupid thing in half.”

 

Uzi smirked, a single sharp scoff slipping out. “Feel free to say that again,” she replied dryly, giving her paper a quick glance. “Actually, say it twice for me.”

 

The group came to a slow stop near a quieter spot along the wall, just out of range of the bigger cluster of drones still milling around the check-in area. It was a little oasis of space—enough for them to finally breathe again.

 

Emily turned to face them, her expression thoughtful. “So… what are we doing now?”

 

Rebecca tilted her head in a shrug, adjusting the lanyard of her name tag more neat around her collar. “I say we all go unpack,” she said. “Meet back here in like, an hour? Maybe we could go some place to eat, if you guys want.”

 

There was a soft murmur of agreement—small nods all around.

 

“Works for me,” Darren added, slipping his paper into his hoodie pocket. “Probably should figure out where my charger’s buried in my bag anyway.”

 

Thad let out a huff. “Yeah, alright. I’m heading out.”

 

“Later,” Uzi said with a wave, echoing the quick chorus of goodbyes that followed as everyone began to peel away in different directions.

 

Uzi, though, decided to stay put. She needed to talk to N—he owed  her a summary after the entire announcement had been lost to a wall of tall, obnoxious drones. N was standing in front of her, and Uzi debated on what she should say next.

 

But, before she could say anything—she noticed as Thad turned to leave, he slowed for just a beat, glancing over his shoulder at N. “You coming, dude?” he asked, tone casual—but not entirely.

 

N didn’t move. He remained where he was, still standing across from Uzi, his gaze soft and unreadable. “In a few minutes,” he said, turning slightly toward Thad but not fully looking away from her.

 

Thad lingered half a second longer. Uzi caught a flicker of something cross his face—an odd narrowing of his eyes, subtle but sharp. And then, just as quickly, it passed.

 

He muttered something under his breath—Uzi could’ve sworn it was “whatever”—before jamming his hands into his hoodie pockets and walking off with a quick, dismissive turn. No smile. No usual sarcasm. Just… irritation?

 

Uzi’s brow furrowed faintly. That wasn’t like Thad. At least, not in a way that felt real. Sure, he was always annoyed about something, but not seriously—that’s why this had been different. He seemed genuinely bothered. Focused. At N? Maybe he had to tell N something, and he was just annoyed he had to wait since he was impatient. Definitely—Thad was just being dramatic like usual… right?

 

She decided not to linger on it too long. She glanced back to N, who was watching her now, expression patient and—annoyingly—gentle.

 

“So?” she asked, folding her arms and tilting her head.

 

N perked up slightly, his thumb jutting over his shoulder as he nodded toward a seating area near the front. “Wanna sit over there?” he offered, motioning toward a quiet corner by the lobby’s lounge—just a cluster of couches by the windows, close enough to the dining area to smell whatever faint industrial food prep was going on, but far enough to not be crowded.

 

Uzi followed his gaze. It wasn’t a bad idea. And, honestly, the idea of sitting sounded nice after everything so far. “Yeah. Sure.”

 

They began walking side by side. The crowd behind them thinned out as more drones headed toward the elevators.

 

Uzi’s fingers idly crinkled the edge of the assignment paper, her thoughts circling—part of her still trying to unpack that weird reaction from Thad, but most of her attention fixed on N.

 

She glanced at him from the corner of her eye. He looked thoughtful, like he was still half-immersed in whatever had been said during the announcements. Or maybe he was thinking about something else entirely.

 

The walk to the lounge wasn’t long—just a quiet few steps away from the crowd, the two of them moving in sync without needing to speak. It wasn’t awkward. Just… calm. Easy. Like neither of them felt the need to fill the silence with noise.

 

When they reached the small lounging area, Uzi immediately claimed a plush chair by the edge of the space, dropping into it with a small sigh. The assignment paper crinkled slightly in her grip. N took the seat just to her right, against the wall, turning his body slightly so he could face her fully.

 

The second he sat down, his attention was already on her—eyes bright, posture relaxed, like he was ready to be helpful or maybe just happy to be near her. Uzi wasn’t sure which. She ignored how weirdly warm that made her feel.

 

“So, what did the guy say?” she asked, leaning back in her seat and glancing at him expectantly.

 

N perked up with a little smile, one of those crooked ones he didn’t seem to realize he had. “You’re gonna love this,” he said, then hesitated, muttering quickly under his breath, “I hope, at least…”

 

Uzi tilted her head, narrowing her eyes playfully. “Okay?”

 

N laughed softly, rubbing the back of his neck. “Right—uh, first he asked if everyone’s excited about the trip starting, and then he gave a quick summary of the plan. But I think you already heard most of the first-day stuff, right?”

 

“Yeah,” she replied, nodding. “Unpack, lunch, dinner. Major grade. All that doom and gloom.”

 

“Right,” N said with a small chuckle, then leaned forward slightly, resting his arms on his knees. “So, tomorrow? We’re going to a history museum.”

 

He sounded… almost excited. Not over the top, but it was there—something in the way his tone picked up and his eyes lit a little. He seemed genuinely interested, like the idea of walking through dusty exhibits and old drone relics was actually appealing.

 

Uzi raised a brow, unimpressed. “That’s it?”

 

His smile faltered, just a bit. That hopeful flicker in his eyes dimmed as his shoulders subtly tensed. “Yeah,” he said, suddenly more sheepish, his voice trailing off.

 

Uzi immediately noticed the shift in N’s face—the way his earlier spark had faded into something more hesitant, more guarded.

 

And with it came a prick of guilt in her chest. He’d seemed genuinely excited to share, and all she’d done was throw that excitement under a bus with one flat-toned comment.

 

It wasn’t even his fault—she just didn’t trust school-planned activities to be anything but boring. But that didn’t make her feel any less like a jerk.

 

Before she could try to fix it, though, N seemed to recover, his expression brightening again with that same odd warmth. “Well,” he said with a grin, “if tomorrow’s not your thing, you might like the third day better.”

 

Uzi forced a smile, though it came off more awkward than convincing. Her voice was a little stilted as she tried to backpedal. “I didn’t say I wasn’t looking forward to it,” she muttered, gesturing vaguely with one hand. “Could be cool.”

 

She wasn’t sure if it helped. It felt like trying to put out a fire with a damp napkin. But she was  trying.

 

To her surprise, N didn’t look hurt—or even doubtful. He just let out a quiet laugh, soft and low like he didn’t want to embarrass her. “It’s okay if you’re not,” he said gently, shrugging a little. “I mean, I get it. Not everyone’s into history stuff.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes with a scoff, but there was no heat in it. She found herself smiling anyway, even if she didn’t really know why. His response had been… nice. Understanding. And somehow, that made it worse—like she didn’t deserve him brushing it off so easily.

 

“Anyway,” N continued, his voice picking up with a new note of enthusiasm, “third day? Guess what—it’s a free day. That wasn’t just a rumor after all.”

 

That got her attention.

 

“For sure?” she asked, her tone lifting with real interest this time. She sat up a little straighter, eyebrows raised. She remembered him mentioning it on the bus ride to the hotel, but there had been a 50/50 chance it was actually true. Knowing that definitively made her feel a hell of a lot better.

 

“Yeah,” N confirmed, clearly pleased that he’d finally said something that sparked her interest. “We can go anywhere, do anything—just check in before dinner.”

 

Uzi hummed, already thinking. That… didn’t seem terrible. Maybe this trip would turn out better than she thought.

 

N’s grin didn’t fade—in fact, it grew. “It gets even better,” he said, his tone laced with that subtle excitement again. “At the end of the free day, everyone’s coming back here for a rooftop dinner.”

 

Uzi blinked, her expression shifting into something that wasn’t forced this time. “Wait, seriously?” A real smile tugged at her lips. “That actually sounds kind of cool.”

 

She leaned forward slightly, elbows on her knees, caught off guard by the genuine flicker of excitement in her chest. “I’m shocked the school’s spending that much on us. They’re usually too cheap to even fix the cafeteria chairs.”

 

N chuckled, nodding. “Yeah, I thought the same thing. But the guy said it’s only happening ‘cause some business sponsored the trip or… something like that.” He scratched the back of his head, glancing up thoughtfully. “Didn’t catch the name. Just remember hearing ‘sponsorship.’”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes and shook her head, lips curled in a dry smirk. “Of course. There’s always a catch.”

 

A beat passed between them—light, comfortable.

 

Then N hesitated. She noticed it immediately—how his posture stiffened just a little, how his gaze dropped before flicking back up toward her. When he finally spoke, his voice had a softer edge to it.

 

“Hey, um… you still wanna hang out on the free day, right? With me?”

 

The way he worded that caught Uzi off guard for a moment—then, she recalled back on the bus, when she had initially asked him the same question. He must’ve just been making sure, but hearing him say that made her conscious of just how bold her question had been.

 

Her first instinct was to say yes without a second thought—but that very instinct made her pause. She didn’t want to come across as too eager. Or weird. Or like she’d been waiting for him to remind her.

 

So instead, she leaned back in her chair, forcing a casual shrug as she looked off to the side like she hadn’t already replayed his question five times in her head. “Mhm,” she said, voice calm. Maybe too calm. Her head was absolutely buzzing with racing thoughts, but she was determined not to show it.

 

N’s eyes lit up immediately. His smile widened, bright and earnest, and he leaned forward just slightly, hands resting on his knees. “Awesome! What would you wanna do?”

 

Uzi glanced at him, and for a split second, her mind blanked. Not because she didn’t have ideas—but because the way he looked at her made it hard to focus on anything else.

 

She sat there, N’s question hanging in the air for a moment as she tilted her head slightly, thinking. What did she want to do? She hadn’t really thought about that. It wasn’t like she had a list of dream destinations ready for a place like New Ore City. If it hadn’t just been another place the school had dragged them to, maybe she would’ve put more thought into it.

 

But after a moment, she looked back at him and shrugged lightly. “I don’t really know,” she admitted honestly, brows lifting just a bit. “Haven’t really thought about it.”

 

But then, almost as an afterthought, a small grin tugged at the corner of her mouth. “I have always wanted to check out the subways, though,” she added with a quiet laugh. “Even if we don’t go anywhere. I dunno—something about it just seems… cool.”

 

N smiled, visibly pleased by the idea. “I’d love that,” he said warmly, and Uzi felt something flutter in her chest.

 

Then he added, “Do you wanna grab food too, while we’re out?”

 

Uzi nodded slightly. “Yeah, probably. We could just wander around until we find something that doesn’t look awful.”

 

“Perfect,” N said with a bit more enthusiasm than necessary, his tone brightening. “I can’t wait to spend time with you.”

 

That line hit Uzi like a brick.

 

Her mind momentarily blanked as his words registered. Not ‘I can’t wait to go’ , not ‘that’ll be fun’ , but ‘I can’t wait to spend time with you. She didn’t show it outwardly—but internally, her systems were practically short-circuiting. She couldn’t even look at him for a second.

 

Instead, she focused her gaze slightly off to the side, as if pretending she hadn’t just caught the phrasing.

 

She managed a tight, polite smile, even as her thoughts spun in a dozen directions.

 

N, seemingly completely unaware of her sudden internal meltdown, continued chatting easily. “Oh—and on the fourth day, we’re going to a planetarium.”

 

Uzi blinked, forcing herself back into the conversation. She furrowed her brow slightly, her tone vaguely skeptical. “Wait, didn’t you say we’re already going to a museum? Isn’t that, like, basically the same thing?”

 

It wasn’t really meant to sound rude—just dry. Her voice carried the usual deadpan edge, masking the way she was still trying to steady herself from earlier.

 

Uzi leaned back a little in her seat, gripping the edge of the cushion with her fingers to ground herself. She was doing her best not to read too much into what he’d said a few seconds ago—but that didn’t stop her mind from replaying it over and over.

 

N gave a small shrug, relaxing back into his chair as he said, “I think the planetarium is supposed to be for the science part of the project.“

 

Uzi groaned, rolling her eyes as she sank deeper into her seat. “Right,” she muttered, voice laced with sarcasm. “Because nothing says ‘fun field trip’ like being forced to write an essay.”

 

She shook her head in disbelief, flicking the paper in her hand. “Our parents paid a ton of money for this trip, and this is what we get? Homework with a side of travel?”

 

N chuckled lightly, rubbing the back of his neck as he admitted, “Yeah, I guess so. But honestly... I kinda see it as a learning experience.”

 

Uzi let out a short scoff, crossing her arms and turning her head slightly away from him. “Yeah. For you ,” she muttered. “Not all of us are weirdly into schoolwork.”

 

N laughed, bashful and a little sheepish. “Hey, I just care about my grades.”

 

That made Uzi glance back at him, arching a brow with a sly smirk tugging at her lips. “So, what, are you saying I  don’t?”

 

N’s eyes widened slightly as panic flickered across his face. He held his hands up in defense, shaking his head. “No—no! That’s not what I meant—”

 

Uzi burst into laughter, cutting him off. “Relax,” she said through a grin, her tone playful. “I’m messing with you.”

 

She leaned back again, the smirk softening into something more casual. “Besides, you wouldn’t be wrong even if you were .

 

N let out a quiet, awkward laugh, visibly relieved. “Oh— Um… yeah, I guess so—“

 

A brief pause followed, and for a second, Uzi felt a strange, prickling tension in the air—as if she might start overanalyzing the moment. So before her thoughts could spiral, she cleared her throat and spoke again, forcing her tone into something steady.

 

“So,” she asked, “what about the last day?”

 

N gave a small nod, folding his hands in his lap as he replied, “Yeah. The last day’s just for packing up. Then we head home.”

 

Uzi tilted her head slightly. “Do you know what time we’re leaving?”

 

He shrugged. “The guy didn’t really say, but... if I had to guess? Probably sometime after lunch. Gives everyone a chance to eat and get their stuff together before we head out.”

 

Uzi nodded slowly. “Makes sense.”

 

There was a short pause where N glanced away, his eyes briefly scanning the floor as if he were thinking something over. Then he looked back at her again, his tone a little more careful this time. “Hey, um… would you want to sit with me on the bus ride back?”

 

Uzi blinked.

 

It wasn’t that the question surprised her—it wasn’t anything crazy, just… she hadn’t expected that to be the next thing out of his mouth.

 

Her mind flicked, unhelpfully, back to the bus ride to New Ore City—For some reason, her brain decided now was the perfect time to relive it all in sharp detail.

 

She felt queasy just remembering all of… that. So, she quickly shoved those thoughts down, mentally clearing her throat.

 

She paused to think for a second—even though all of that happened, she still would love to sit with him on the way back. Not because she had intentions of that—she just… enjoyed his company. Genuinely. Just being around him, just talking to him had some weird effect on her that made her suddenly feel so calm and easygoing. She didn’t want to keep thinking about this, though. She could unpack this more another time.

 

So, she opened her mouth to agree—but then remembered.

 

Thad.

 

He had already asked her. Back at school, before they’d even boarded the buses. She remembered the way his voice had sounded—awkward, almost defensive—after she told him N had already asked to sit with her. She’d watched his expression twist into something unreadable, something off .

 

It had bugged her enough that she promised to sit with him on the way back, hoping it’d smooth things over. And it had, at least on the surface. But now, thinking about it again—combined with the way Thad had scowled at N earlier and muttered something under his breath—it was starting to feel less like a coincidence.

 

What was going on with him? Every time N came up, Thad acted strangely. Was something going on between him and N? Did they get into an argument? Did it have something to do with her?!

 

Uzi didn’t have the time to unravel it all right now. Whatever it was, it could wait.

 

But the weight of that promise she’d made hung over her like a lead balloon, dragging her answer down before she could give it freely.

 

She forced a tight-lipped smile, trying to decide how to respond without making things weird—for either of them.

 

Uzi cleared her throat lightly, forcing the words out before she could hesitate. “I, uh… already told Thad I’d sit with him on the way back.”

 

She tried to sound casual about it, but the moment the words left her, she caught the subtle change in N’s face. His smile didn’t quite vanish, but it faltered—just slightly, like it had lost its footing. He didn’t look hurt exactly, just… let down. Something softened in his expression, something quiet and disappointed.

 

“Oh,” he said, blinking once before glancing to the side. “Uh—“ He looked back at her, and flashed a very unconvincing smile,”It’s alright! I’ll just—figure something else out…”

 

There was no edge to his voice. If anything, it was too neutral, too quickly collected. And that made something twist in Uzi’s chest more than if he’d looked visibly upset.

 

Without even thinking, she rushed to fill the silence. “But—uh—you could sit across from us? On the other seat, I mean. That way, we could still talk or… whatever.”

 

The words tumbled out faster than she meant them to, and as soon as they did, Uzi blinked, almost startled by her own reaction. Why did I say that?  That wasn’t like her.

 

Normally, she’d let the moment pass—maybe apologize awkwardly, maybe not at all—but she wouldn’t try  to fix it like that.

 

Not unless she actually… cared.

 

She frowned slightly to herself. Sure, she already admitted—quietly, internally, and under duress—that she liked N. Or something  like that. But caring about how he felt to this degree? That was new. And a little disorienting.

 

But N’s head perked up at her words, and the disappointment faded from his face like it’d never been there. “Yeah?” he said, a bit more animated now. “That sounds great.”

 

He smiled again, this time a little more genuinely, like the conversation hadn’t skipped a beat. Whatever weight had been there a second ago had lifted, and Uzi tried not to wonder what might’ve happened if she hadn’t  said anything.

 

She thought that might be the end of it—that he’d probably suggest they head back to their rooms, or maybe she would. She was about to say something to that effect, when he beat her to it.

 

“Hey—” N’s voice cut through, quieter this time, more deliberate.

 

She looked over at him, eyebrows raised slightly. His expression had changed again, and this time, it wasn’t disappointment. It was something more serious. Thoughtful. Careful.

 

“Can I… talk to you about something?” he asked, almost cautiously, like he wasn’t sure how she’d respond.

 

Uzi hesitated. That shift in tone caught her off guard. “Yeah— Sure…?”

 

There was a pause. Then N spoke again, this time slower.

 

“It’s about your roommates.”

Notes:

Finally posted 😫

I love heavy dialogue scenes like this—in the last chapter, I debated for a while weather I’d js have Uzi hear everything the announcer guy says and then js leave to go back to her room, and then have the story continue from there. But then I was like,’what if she gets N to fill her in on everything?’ Also I kinda rushed the end of the last chapter cuz I was almost behind on my posting schedule and I was NOT gonna disappoint the few people still reading this 😭🤚

Thanks for sticking with the story yall, especially to those who have been here since the very beginning!!! Not even gonna lie, if no one was reading this I probably would’ve js stopped writing it a few chapters ago, but js knowing people are still interested in it kinda gives me motivation in itself.

That’s so funny to think of cuz initially when I was writing this, I didn’t even think anyone would read it or enjoy my writing. I was js tired of there not being any good Nuzi fics where it didn’t make the characters OOC and stuff, so I was like ‘why not?’

Now, I’m still writing this for fun and I absolutely love it, but knowing other people enjoy it too makes me wanna keep writing, yk? I’m not even like stressing abt posting chapters either, and I js love the process and stuff

Ok enough being sappy 😭🤚

In other news, GO CHECK OUT MY OTHER FIC IF U HAVENT ALREADY /nf 💔

It’s gonna be another Nuzi fic but then also like, an apocalypse AU which I have literally seen none of when it comes to MD?? I can’t find a single fic that’s both like, a zombie apocalypse type fic not set in cannon that’s also a Nuzi fic, so this is gonna be sm fun! (If u know abt another one though please lmk 👀👀)

I can’t wait to post more chapters, I’ve already finished the first one but I wanna write a couple in advance before I start posting anything. Plus it’s still a draft I need to heavily edit. UGH it’s actually gonna be so good, I’ve thought through a bunch of lore and stuff and I’m having sm fun

Also super off topic and random but like, I’ve been trying to read more MD fics recently right? I’m trying to get back into reading fan fiction again in general too cuz I literally only write but never read 💔

But I can’t find a SINGLE good MD fic 😭 or like, specifically a Nuzi fic that has NO smut (cuz no offense but that’s soooo weird they’re like literally minors 😭 or even if ur like ‘they’re aged up 👹’ the characters are still kinda portrayed as minors in the series ((maybe 18 at the most?? But still like be so fr)) and saying they’re adults doesn’t really mean anything. Also for me personally I js don’t like reading smut in general and esp abt characters I like cuz it ruins them for me 💔) but then also I can’t find one that’s well written either 😭 OR LIKE it’ll have a super good plot line, but then I start reading it and don’t necessarily like the writing style, and I start editing it in my head like I do when I edit the drafts I’ve written of my story 🥲 then I get mad cuz like “bro why is nothing well written this is pissing me off” and then to decompress I start writing more of my fic so I feel better 💔

Idk if that struggle is unique to me or not, I think I’m js really picky when it comes to reading in general 😭 it’s so bad

OK OK I need to stop rambling I’m so sorry LMAO

Next chapter will be posted either Friday or Saturday. Saturday at the latest. So I’ll see ya’ll then ig! Thanks for reading 😝

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 73: Elevator

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi’s eyes widened before narrowing with tension, as if the realization had physically hit her.

 

Right.

 

She’d mentioned it to the group back when everyone was sharing who their roommates were. It was such a casual, offhand conversation—only because none of the others could’ve known what that meant. What risk there was to her that J was her roommate.

 

N hadn’t been able to speak up then. He couldn’t risk it. No one else knew. So, he had just stood there in silence—though, Uzi couldn’t help but notice how petrified he looked.

 

N leaned forward slightly, lowering his voice. “You said J, right?”

 

Uzi gave a small nod, followed by a heavy sigh. Her hands moved up to her face, dragging down as if she could rub the frustration out of her thoughts.

 

Then she slouched slightly, elbow planted on the armrest while her cheek dropped into her palm. Her eyes drifted away from him, staring off toward the floor. Her voice was quiet, uncertain.

 

“I don’t know what to do.”

 

Her tone wasn’t panicked—just tired. Worn thin from constantly turning this over in her mind and coming up with nothing.

 

N’s brow furrowed with concern. “V’s in your room too, right?”

 

“Yeah,” Uzi muttered, her voice still low. “But I don’t know if that makes me feel better… or worse.”

 

N tried to offer a small smile, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “That should be a good thing,” he said gently. “Hopefully.” He hesitated for a beat, then added, “Has V been… nice? To you, I mean.”

 

Uzi gave a half-hearted shrug. “As nice as someone like her’s capable of being.”

 

That earned a short, dry laugh from N. “Yeah. I get what you mean.”

 

The silence between them held a slight weight, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. More like they were both sorting through different layers of the same problem.

 

Then N leaned back, looking at her carefully. “I’ll talk to her. Make sure everything’s okay.”

 

But Uzi still didn’t look at him. She was lost in thought, her fingers absently toying with the edge of her sleeve. Did J know she knew?

 

V had warned her days ago that J might be catching on—but how much did J know now? It had been impossible to tell.

 

The way J spoke to her back in their room... it had this calculated edge. Was it just her usual off-putting charisma? Or something more deliberate?

 

It was starting to feel like J wanted Uzi to second-guess herself. Like she was playing a game—stringing her along, waiting to see what she’d do.

 

Or maybe… maybe J still wasn’t certain, and Uzi was just spiraling over nothing.

 

But that was the problem. Uzi didn’t know. And in a situation like this, not knowing was the most dangerous part.

 

Uzi finally turned back toward N, her expression tight with apprehension as she gently lowered her hand from her cheek and let it fall into her lap. She was quiet for a moment, her eyes searching his face for… something. Reassurance, maybe. Or just a reality check.

 

She took a breath, deep and steady, but even then her voice betrayed her unease.

 

“Do you think she’s gonna try to kill me?”

 

Her words hung in the air—quiet, raw, and unfiltered. She didn’t look at him when she said it. Her gaze slipped away, dropping to the space beside him like it was easier to look at anything but his reaction.

 

“She could, you know,” she added softly. “This trip... it’d be really easy for her. No cameras. No adults paying attention. Just her, me, and two beds apart.” Her brows knit together. “And she already… she basically threatened me. Not directly, but—”

 

Uzi's thoughts slipped back to earlier, before she’d come downstairs. That hand— J’s  hand—settling on her shoulder from behind like a noose. That low, lilting voice in her ear.

 

“I just hope nothing… unfortunate happens.”

 

The words made her stomach twist even now. It hadn’t been loud. It hadn’t been aggressive. But it had felt like a knife just the same.

 

She didn’t realize how tightly she’d pressed her hands together until she suddenly felt warmth wrap around one of them.

 

She looked down in surprise—N was holding her hand. Both of his hands cradled one of hers gently, but with purpose. She looked up at him again, startled by how serious he looked now.

 

His usual warmth was still there, but it had shifted—hardened into something resolute.

 

“I’m not going to let her lay a finger on you,” he said, his voice low but fierce. “I promise.

 

His grip on her hand tightened just slightly. Not enough to hurt, just enough to ground her—to let her feel the certainty in his words.

 

Uzi blinked, feeling a knot of emotion rising in her chest she couldn’t quite name. She gave his hand the smallest squeeze in return, almost instinctively. Her voice came out quiet, uncertain.

 

“I trust you,” she said. “But... how are you supposed to protect me when I’m literally sleeping in the same room as her?”

 

N didn’t respond right away. His brows drew together as he considered that—her logic was hard to argue. His lips parted, then closed again, like he wanted to reassure her but didn’t want to say something he couldn’t guarantee.

 

Then his eyes sharpened slightly with a new thought.

 

“I’ll talk to V.”

 

His tone was decisive now. Still gentle, but with an undercurrent of urgency.

 

Uzi looked at him again, uncertain. If anyone could reach V, it might be N—but even that wasn’t a sure thing. Still, she didn’t say anything. Because part of her… wanted to believe him. Even if she still didn’t understand why he cared so much, not yet.

 

Then, Uzi could feel it—this strange tightness in her chest, that prickling warmth just behind her eyes. It wasn’t sadness, not exactly. She wasn’t about to cry.

 

It was more like everything was heavy all of a sudden. Too much noise in her head, too many worries pressed into too small a space.

 

She didn’t look away from N this time, but her voice wavered faintly.

 

“What could V even do , though?” she murmured. “J could wait until she’s not around. It’s not like—”

 

“I know,” N cut in, his voice sharper than before—rushed, like he was afraid of where her thoughts were going. “But V promised me, remember? She told me she'd watch out for you.”

 

There was something frantic in his tone now, something raw. His words tumbled out too fast, and he wasn’t meeting her gaze anymore. His fingers, which had been so steady just a moment ago, loosened their hold around hers.

 

“I’ll do whatever I can,” he added, quieter now, a tremble in his voice. “I’m not gonna let J—…”

 

He stopped himself. His gaze dropped to the floor, and his voice softened almost to a whisper.

 

“I can’t lose you. Not after everything.”

 

Uzi’s eyes flickered, her breath catching slightly at the weight behind his words. She felt her grip tighten around his hand, anchoring him there, even if neither of them were sure what exactly they were holding onto.

 

Her voice was steady when she spoke—soft, but sure:

 

“It’s gonna be okay.”

 

She let out a slow breath and nodded, more to herself than anything.

 

“I’ll trust V,” she added. “It’s just five days. I mean, J’s probably just trying to freak me out anyway. She seems like one of those types. All bark, less bite.”

 

N looked up at her then, and the moment their eyes met, his shoulders seemed to relax. He gave a small nod, the faintest hint of a smile tugging at his lips.

 

“Yeah… you’re right,” he said, though his voice still carried a trace of hesitation.

 

He stood slowly, his hand gently slipping out of hers as he did. He didn’t let go all at once—it was careful, almost reluctant, like some part of him didn’t want to let go at all.

 

“We should probably head back,” he said after a beat. “Before someone starts wondering where we went.”

 

Uzi nodded and pushed herself to her feet, brushing off her pants with her hands in a half-nervous gesture.

 

“Yeah,” she agreed. “That’s probably a good idea.”

 

But her gaze lingered on him for a second longer before she turned. The conversation hadn’t fixed everything—but it had made something feel a little lighter. Not safe, not yet… but maybe a little less alone.

 

Uzi scanned the quiet lounge, the fluorescent lights above humming faintly. It was mostly empty now, just her and N lingering in the space, and she realized she wasn’t exactly sure where the elevators were. Her memory of the layout blurred beneath everything else that had happened.

 

She turned toward him, one brow lifted slightly. “Wait—uh, which way were the elevators again?”

 

N glanced sideways, clearly trying to remember for a second himself before pointing to the far right. “That way. Past the vending machines.”

 

“Alright,” Uzi said with a small nod, already starting in that direction with him beside her.

 

They walked in step, and while it should’ve felt comfortable—it usually  did—something about the silence this time felt... unfinished. Not awkward exactly, but like there was something both of them wanted to say and didn’t know how to bring up.

 

Uzi glanced at him out of the corner of her eye, her fingers twitching slightly at her sides. The quiet was starting to gnaw at her nerves, so she did the first thing that made sense: break it.

 

“So, are you—”

 

But at the same time, N spoke up too.

 

“Hey, did you—”

 

They both cut off instantly, looking at each other in mutual surprise before quickly fumbling to apologize over one another.

 

“Oh—sorry, you go ahead,” Uzi said quickly.

 

“No, no, you first,” N said at the exact same time, giving an awkward little laugh.

 

He rubbed the back of his neck, sheepish, his gaze darting away for a second before he looked back at her. His smile tilted lopsidedly, a little flustered but genuine.

 

Uzi couldn’t help but mirror a small grin, caught somewhere between amused and exasperated.

 

“Okay,” she relented, then paused, needing a beat to find her place again. “I was just gonna ask if you’re really  planning to spend a whole hour unpacking.”

 

Her tone was dry, playful in the way only she could manage—like she wasn’t sure if she was teasing him or genuinely concerned for his mental well-being.

 

N blinked once, then gave a soft chuckle, clearly relieved by the shift in tone. He gave a loose shrug, a small smile tugging at his lips. “Probably not,” he said. “I didn’t bring much anyway.”

 

“Same,” Uzi replied with a nod,“What’s left to unpack anyways—extra socks and a mental preparation for the next five days?”

 

They both shared a quiet laugh before slipping into a momentary lull. The walk wasn’t far, and soon enough they reached the elevator at the end of the hall.

 

Uzi hit the button and the panel lit up with a faint hum, but the doors stayed stubbornly shut. For now.

 

After not even a moment of waiting, Uzi turned to face N. “So… do you wanna meet back here in like…twenty minutes?” Her tone was slightly hesitant, like she wasn’t entirely sure whether that was too much to ask of him or not.

 

N smiled softly. “Yeah. That’d be great.” Then, he added,“We can just meet in the spot where we were gonna meet everyone else in an hour. We’d just be early.”

 

Uzi nodded. ”Sounds good.” She then glanced away, thinking, before she turned slightly to face him again. “Hey, uh... if anything changes, I’ll text you, okay?”

 

N nodded without hesitation. “Alright. I’ll keep that in mind.”

 

After he finished speaking, a brief silence stretched across them, not uncomfortable but quiet enough to let the tension from earlier settle gently between them again—familiar and strangely comforting.

 

Then, with a chime, the elevator arrived.

 

The doors parted with a soft whoosh, and three drones stepped out, chatting among themselves. No one else followed, leaving the elevator empty for them. Uzi and N stepped inside together.

 

As the doors slid closed behind them, N turned his head a little and blinked. “Wait—uh. What floor were we supposed to go to again? I kinda forgot.”

 

Uzi glanced up at him, an amused look flashing across her face.

 

She noticed that he looked slightly bashful, rubbing the back of his neck again like he had earlier. She didn’t comment on it—just stepped forward and pressed the button for the fourth floor.

 

“Don’t worry about it,” she said, glancing over her shoulder at him. “It’s four. Everyone from the trip’s on the same floor, I think.”

 

N gave a small nod in response, watching her for a moment before letting his gaze drift to the numbers lighting up above the door.

 

After pressing the button, Uzi walked back over to stand beside N.

 

As the elevator began its slow ascent, the quiet hum of its machinery filled the space—low, constant, and void of anything else. No soft music, no artificial ambiance to fill the silence. Just the still air and the faint mechanical groan beneath their feet.

 

Uzi stood beside N, her arms crossed loosely, eyes on the digital floor numbers ticking upward above the door. The silence wasn’t suffocating, but it pressed in all the same. Not awkward, exactly. Just... weighted. At least to her.

 

There was always this strange pressure whenever she was standing this close to him without anything being said. Not a bad kind of pressure—just the sort that made her hyper-aware of everything: the distance between them, the warmth of his presence, the way her own mind kept fumbling over itself trying to find something, anything, to say.

 

Why did it always feel like this? It wasn’t uncomfortable. She liked being around him. Actually, she really liked being around him—maybe that was the problem. Her brain never shut up when he was this close. Every second of silence made her wonder if she should speak, if he was waiting for her to say something, if he even noticed the tension she felt, or if this was just normal to him.

 

Maybe she was the only one overthinking it.

 

Again.

 

She let herself sneak a glance at him out of the corner of her eye.

 

N looked… fine. Content, even. His expression was calm, shoulders relaxed, eyes casually tracking the numbers above them. He didn’t seem tense at all.

 

Uzi quickly looked away before he noticed her staring, her thoughts starting to spiral.

 

Right. I’m just being weird again, she told herself with a quiet internal groan. She really needed to stop doing that—reading into everything like she was trying to decipher ancient code.

 

She exhaled through her nose, a little too audibly. The sound broke the hush in the elevator, and she immediately regretted it when she saw N glance at her from the corner of her vision. Her eyes flicked up toward him.

 

He was looking at her now, curious—gentle, not prying, just quietly picking up on her mood like he always did.

 

Great.

 

She hadn’t meant to make a sound. Hadn’t meant to give away how tightly wound her thoughts had become in just a few minutes of standing beside him.

 

Uzi quickly looked away again, silently scolding herself. Smooth. Real subtle.

 

To Uzi’s surprise, though, N didn’t ask what was wrong. He didn’t prod or press or make some awkward attempt to fill the silence.

 

Instead, in a gesture so casually unexpected it stunned her, he simply raised his hand and gave her a light pat on the head—once, twice—and then rested his palm there, his thumb gently brushing in soft arcs along the edge of her head.

 

Uzi froze.

 

Not because she was alarmed, but because… what?

 

She didn’t pull away. That was the part that caught her off guard the most. She should’ve flinched, shoved him, called him weird—but her body didn’t move. Her systems didn’t even spike. If anything, she felt the opposite of alarmed.

 

Still, some primal part of her programming refused to let the moment slide without commentary, so she side-eyed him, narrowed her gaze, and threw him a lazy glare that said, You’re ridiculous. The kind of look she gave other drones when she was annoyed—except this time, the irritation was hollow, performative.

 

Even she could tell it wasn’t convincing.

 

N, either oblivious or knowingly calling her bluff, didn’t react beyond a small shift in his hand. His thumb kept moving.

 

Uzi let out a soft, half-hearted groan—more like a sigh with teeth—and then, before she even realized what she was doing, she leaned into him.

 

Just slightly. Barely a movement. But enough that her temple pressed into the side of his shoulder, the familiar feel of his frame solid and warm against her. She didn’t look up. Didn’t move. Her voice came out in a mumble, just loud enough for him to hear.

 

“You’re so annoying.”

 

But her tone wasn’t biting. It was quiet, almost fond. There was no edge to it. Just honesty and a thin veil of mockery she wasn’t really trying to sell.

 

Before N could even think to respond, the elevator chimed—a crisp, clinical ding that might as well have shattered the moment like glass. They had reached the fourth floor.

 

Almost instantly, both of them shifted—reflexively, instinctively. Uzi pulled away, straightening up as though nothing had happened. N did the same, his hand falling back to his side.

 

It wasn’t that either of them wanted to move, exactly—it was just that they had  to.

 

Because as soon as the doors slid open, there were two drones waiting outside, ready to enter, and lingering too long like that would’ve drawn attention neither of them wanted.

 

Neither spoke as they stepped out, brushing past the waiting drones without so much as a glance.

 

It wasn’t awkward—it was self-preservation.

 

Or, at least, that’s what Uzi told herself as she walked a little faster than necessary, heart quietly ticking away like a timer counting down to something she didn’t quite understand.

 

Now all that was left was to get to their rooms.

 

As the elevator doors slid shut behind them with a soft mechanical hiss, Uzi and N lingered just outside in the hallway, both strangely hesitant to part ways despite having no real reason to linger.

 

For a moment, neither of them said anything.

 

Uzi kept her gaze lowered, her eyes trailing the dull hotel carpet, as if pretending to study the pattern might somehow delay the inevitable. But that didn’t last long—she finally glanced up at him, brushing some stray strands of hair out of her face and muttering, “Well… I guess I should head back now.”

 

N nodded along, his smile faint and just a little uncertain. “Yeah. Me too.”

 

Another pause. Not the comfortable kind—this one felt suspended, like neither of them knew how to end the conversation, or maybe didn’t want to.

 

Then, N tilted his head and asked, “Which way’s your room?”

 

Uzi pointed over her shoulder without much thought. “That way. Pretty sure, anyway.”

 

N laughed softly, a little sheepish as he thumbed over his own shoulder. “Mine’s the opposite.”

 

And then—another silence.

 

The kind that stretched just a little too long.

 

Not because they had more to say, but because leaving felt weird now. Like putting down something fragile and walking away from it without looking back.

 

Uzi couldn’t stand the weight of it anymore.

 

She gave him a quick wave, short and awkward. “Bye,” she said, her voice sharper than she intended, more like a cut than a farewell.

 

Without waiting for a reply, she turned on her heel and started walking down the hall.

 

Behind her, she heard N call out, “See you later,” his voice drifting after her, soft and easy.

 

She didn’t look back. But she could tell, from the sound of his steps fading behind her, that he was walking the other way.

 

Uzi sighed quietly as she walked, the kind that deflated her core just a little. That had been… something. Not bad. Not awkward, even. Just something. And she didn’t understand why it had been so hard to say goodbye. That wasn’t like her. Since when did goodbyes feel like unfinished sentences?

 

But she didn’t have time to unpack all that now. She had a bigger, more pressing concern waiting for her at the end of the hallway: her room. The one she was sharing with J.

 

The closer she got, the heavier her legs felt. A quiet, creeping dread tightened around her thoughts. There was no telling what kind of mood J would be in. Whether she'd act like nothing happened, or… something worse. Something calculating.

 

Each step made it feel more real. That this—whatever she had with N—wasn’t the only thing she had to carry right now.

Notes:

Honestly, I don’t dislike this chapter, but it’s js not my favorite

It’s not like a ‘oh I could’ve done better’ thing either, idk 😭 but I think it got the point across that I needed ig

Cuz I feel like this is a pretty important thing - obvi N is talking to Uzi abt J being her roommate and stuff. But then Uzi is *basically* saying “even if you say ur gonna protect me, how the hell do you been plan to??” *without* saying that, if that makes sense

Or ig she said that, but js in a bit of a nicer way 😭🤚

And then N is kinda freaking out trying to figure out what the hell he’s gonna do, if anything, even though it’s like ‘what is there even to be done?’

I think this shows his more anxious/nervous side, cuz normally I feel like he’s js kinda silly or acts oblivious (or is oblivious 💀) and he rarely shows this side of him to anyone. It’s like, he wants to present to others like everything is in his control, even though internally he’s falling apart

I feel like I haven’t been really showing that that much, but it’s probably cuz again he’s trying to present a specific way to others, but now that he feels like he can *really* trust Uzi and knows her on a more personal level, even if he’s not doing it on purpose he js shows that side of him more, if that makes sense? Like, subconsciously but also consciously he’s more comfortable around her? I hope that makes sense 💀

Either way, I js feel bad for him cuz he’s def stressing abt this even if he’s not showing that to Uzi, cuz ik he doesn’t want to freak her out 🥲

And then also, on another note, I feel like Uzi has *finally* accepted that she really likes him and stuff, but doesn’t know how to go abt it. Like, I think the reason she’s not thinking abt it more directly or even asking him ‘what are we,’ is because she’s kinda scared of that. Like, that’s new for her, and *really* weird, and makes her *really* uncomfortable, so she’s js trying to process it all. And she fucking hates labels (might be projecting a tad bit 💔) so she’s not even considering asking him if they’re dating 😭 (I think that might be a *tiny* bit ooc considering the events in the last episode of the show where she asks him out without asking him out, but like I think it’s js contextual. Like, in this specific situation she has a *kind of* valid reason not to be direct abt that ((COUGH but she’s using that excuse of ‘what if J finds out?’ as a reason to avoid talking to him abt it)), but then at the same time if she was in character like, *exactly*, it’d probably be a bit different. But then that goes back to being contextual, cuz u gotta take the past 70+ chapters into account on how her character is 😭🤚 I’m trying to keep her in character, but I feel like I’m portraying more of her overthinking/self-doubting kinda side. I don’t think that’s a bad thing at all, it really js depends on how it’s portrayed, and I’m trying my best not to make it super surface level like ‘oh she’s an over thinker and that’s her personality’ cuz there’s so much more to her than that. U gotta ask like, why is she like that, and what made her become that way? Again, goes back to the contextual thing.)

Anyways, also, it’s like she’s purposely trying to hide from others that she likes him, too? I can understand it to an extent, cuz like one of the main reasons is that she doesn’t want the wrong person seeing them, spreading a rumor that they’re dating or som idk, and then J finding out and then getting really sus abt it.

And then also, a few chapters ago, when V was talking to Uzi at her locker, V told her that whenever N gets close to someone he tends to open up to them, and J knows that too. So V is already *kinda* worried even if she’s acting like she doesn’t gaf. And then she also probably thinks N is being an absolute idiot rn, cuz if he cares sm abt Uzi, why he getting so close to her? I feel bad that V is kinda forced to be the middle man in this whole thing 💔

Ok i’m gonna stop yapping abt this now before I accidentally spoil something 🥲 I think abt this story way too much LMAO

The next chapter should *kind of* clear things up? Not even gonna lie, I haven’t written it yet, but based off of my outline it should be pretty good… I think

The next chapter will come out on Tuesday. See yall then!

Also rq, thank yall sm for all the recommendations in the comments of the last chapter 😭🙏 Even if I didn’t respond to them all, I promise I read all of them, so like I’ll def keep all of them in mind and check them out.

Ok I’m gonna go now BYE

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 74: Wait

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi finally reached the door to her room, pausing just outside it. She drew in a slow breath, steadying herself as best she could, then eased the door open with cautious fingers.

 

Inside, the space was comfortably lit, the faint hum of conversation meeting her immediately. Her gaze landed on the small table at the far end of the room—where Lizzy, V, and J were gathered. V sat with one leg crossed over the other, elbow resting lazily on the table, while J leaned against the edge with arms folded, a casual tilt to her posture that still managed to feel vaguely predatory. Lizzy, meanwhile, was talking animatedly—gesturing with her hands and chattering about something with an exaggerated flair that made it easy to guess it was either about shopping or her latest crush.

 

As soon as Lizzy caught sight of Uzi, she brightened and waved. “Oh hey! What took you so long?” Her voice was casual, but loud enough to pierce the rest of the conversation.

 

Uzi gave a half-hearted wave in return, but her steps slowed ever so slightly. That question had caught her off guard—and she felt J and V’s eyes shift toward her. J’s attention wasn’t overtly hostile, but it was alert. Focused. V, on the other hand, looked like she couldn’t care less. Like she always did.

 

Crap. She couldn’t say she’d been with N—not with J standing right there.

 

She forced her tone to stay neutral as she replied, “They couldn’t find my name tag. I was talking to one of the staff about it.”

 

It was a complete and blatant lie. But it was convincing enough… hopefully.

 

Lizzy wrinkled her nose sympathetically. “Ugh, seriously? That’s such a pain. Anyway, I just realized I forgot to pack my favorite lip gloss and I swear it’s gonna throw off my whole look for tomorrow—”

 

She continued, launching back into her rant without missing a beat. Uzi exhaled through her nose, resisting the urge to roll her eyes.

 

Without bothering to respond, she moved toward her bed with slow, careful steps, all too aware of the atmosphere behind her.

 

She could feel J’s gaze lingering—calculating, maybe—but when Uzi glanced out of the corner of her eye, J wasn’t saying anything. Just watching.

 

V’s expression was harder to read. Not unfriendly… but unreadable. Which, somehow, was worse.

 

Uzi walked over to the side of her bed, forcing herself to act natural. She was good at that, right? Pretending things were fine?

 

Even if her core was twisting with tension beneath the surface, she wasn’t going to show it. Not here. Not with J in the room.

 

Uzi moved on autopilot as she reached into her pocket, pulling out her phone and setting it gently on the nightstand with a soft clunk. Her eyes shifted to the duffle bag sprawled on her bed—still untouched where she’d dropped it off earlier.

 

With a quick pull, she unzipped it and fished out her small hygiene pouch, setting it beside her phone. That was the only thing she’d really need later, and the last thing she wanted was to be digging through her bag in front of everyone at the end of the night.

 

She gave her hands a brisk dust-off, then zipped the bag shut again. That was it. She was done unpacking. That had taken all of—what, five seconds? She blinked at the bag, then let out a quiet, ironic breath through her nose.

 

Honestly, that was almost too efficient. Not that she was complaining. The less time she had to spend doing mundane things with J somewhere behind her, the better.

 

Grabbing the duffle by the handle, she lowered it to the floor, nudging it neatly beside her bed before settling herself onto the mattress. She reclined back against the headboard, shifting her weight until she was reasonably comfortable. Her fingers curled around her phone again as she reached for it, the screen lighting up in her hand.

 

Might as well scroll through something brainless for a while. She had about twenty minutes to kill before heading back down to meet N—and the idea of that, oddly, made her stomach flutter. Not in a bad way. It was… kind of nice, actually.

 

She smiled faintly, her thumb hovering above the screen but unmoving for a moment as her mind drifted. Just thinking about him—about the way he’d looked at her earlier, about how warm his hands had felt holding hers—was enough to pull that small, involuntary grin to her face.

 

But the moment it happened, awareness snapped back into her like a lightning bolt. Her smile faltered, then vanished altogether. J was in the room. So was V. Lizzy might not have noticed anything, too absorbed in her own world, but J? If she caught even a trace of that expression…

 

Uzi’s posture straightened slightly, and she wiped the expression from her face like someone clearing a smudge from a mirror. Her features went still—carefully blank. Just neutral. Just unbothered. Like she hadn’t just been smiling like a total idiot over a boy. Because that’s what it felt like.

 

Stupid.

 

And yet, beneath that neutral mask, her thoughts wouldn’t quiet.

 

Uzi’s thumb lazily flicked across her phone screen, scrolling through a feed she wasn’t really absorbing. Bright photos, updates from classmates, pointless drama—none of it held her attention. It all bled together into static. Her mind wasn’t on any of it. Not really.

 

Instead, it was running in every direction, but somehow kept looping back to the same thing.

 

Or rather, the same drone. 

 

She let out a quiet sigh through her nose, the kind that deflated her slightly into the mattress.

 

Okay. Fine. She might as well use the next few minutes to unpack everything. Not her bag—her head. If she didn’t, she was going to keep spiraling into fragmented thoughts and awkward butterflies and start convincing herself that she was just being outright cringy.

 

So… she liked N. That much she could admit to herself now. She liked him. Not in some distant, abstract way either. No, it was the real kind—the kind where she felt something tighten in her chest when he smiled at her, or when he held her hand like it was something precious. The kind where she got flustered just thinking about how close he’d stood to her earlier.

 

But liking him wasn’t simple. Not even close.

 

N wasn’t a normal guy. He wasn’t even like her. He was a disassembly drone.

 

She hadn’t let herself dwell on that too deeply yet. Not until now. But now, with nothing to distract her but a dead scroll through irrelevant posts, the thought finally started to unfold in her mind.

 

So, disassembly drones craved oil. Needed  it. That was just what they were. It was what they did . So then—how was he…? Where did he get it from? Was he just avoiding it somehow? Suppressing it? Or was he getting it from somewhere else? Somewhere she didn’t want to think about too hard?

 

She frowned slightly at the thought, eyes dimming as they flicked past another irrelevant post. Maybe she should ask him.

 

She should ask him.

 

That would be the responsible thing to do.

 

But knowing herself… she probably wouldn’t. Either she’d forget in the moment, or she’d overthink it and back down. Maybe she was afraid of the answer. Maybe she just didn’t want to make things weird. Or maybe she just didn’t want to see his face fall if she made him feel guilty.

 

But that thought— how would that even work? —it stuck. It throbbed in her brain like a bruise pressed too hard.

 

Her and him, liking  each other… how did that even function? Were they just going to keep sneaking around, pretending nothing was happening when they were in public and holding hands in quiet corners like cowards?

 

She hated that.

 

She hated the secrecy, the fragility of it all. The way every good moment between them came with an edge of danger—like someone might catch them, like J might catch them, and then… everything would fall apart. Her heart might be caught up in this, but her mind was still practical. Still cautious. Still full of doubt.

 

And yet… even with all those uncertainties swimming in her chest, Uzi couldn’t stop thinking about the way N had looked at her earlier. The warmth in his voice. The quiet way he’d said he couldn’t lose her.

 

That meant something. Right?

 

Right?

 

Uzi’s thumb slowed, then stopped completely as her feed blurred into a stream of things she didn’t care about. A photo. A caption. Someone’s comment. All of it irrelevant noise. With a slow exhale, she set her phone down beside her on the bed and stared at the ceiling, her thoughts boiling up again—louder now.

 

Okay. So she liked N. Fine. But what was this?

 

What were they?

 

They weren’t dating. At least, she didn’t think they were. The word alone made her feel queasy—too official, too exposed. Like putting a name on it would somehow make it heavier. Realer. And that was terrifying. Just the idea of asking N what he thought they were made her cringe internally. Not because she didn’t want to know, but because the vulnerability of the question alone made her want to crawl into a hole.

 

Still… the question haunted her.

 

Were they something? Was this nothing? 

 

Maybe N had an answer. Maybe he knew  what they were, or at least had some idea. He always seemed more emotionally grounded than she was—more open, more certain about the way he felt. And she knew how she  felt. At least, she thought she did. She cared about him. Deeply. It wasn’t surface-level. It wasn’t a passing crush. It was something real—something she could feel in her core.

 

When he was hurting, she felt it too. When he looked at her like she mattered, it made something in her chest ache in a way she couldn’t explain. She wanted to protect him, support him, keep him close—and that wasn’t just infatuation. That was something else. Something scarier.

 

But still… everything about this was so damn complicated.

 

She didn’t feel awkward  around N, not in the uncomfortable way. It was more like a strange pressure inside her, one she couldn’t quite name. Like she was standing on the edge of something new and didn’t know how to step forward without tripping.

 

Maybe the only reason it felt weird was because it was new. Foreign territory. She’d never felt this way about anyone before—never gotten this far.

 

The last time she’d even tried to be in a relationship, it fizzled out before it ever started. It hadn’t made it past the “talking” stage. And even then, it didn’t feel like this.

 

Not even close.

 

This—whatever this  was with N—didn’t follow any normal rules. It was more… emotionally charged. More secretive. More delicate. Like they were both holding something fragile between them and trying not to drop it.

 

The problem was, she didn’t even know what she was holding.

 

And she hated it.

 

She hated not knowing. She hated how messy emotions were—how they came without instructions and made her overthink everything. Uzi groaned under her breath and pressed both palms hard against her face, dragging her hands down like she could just wipe the thoughts away.

 

Why was this so hard?

 

Why couldn’t it just be simple?

 

Why did she like him so much?

 

Her hands dropped to her lap, and she sat in silence for a moment, the faint sounds of Lizzy still chattering in the background like white noise. Uzi wasn’t listening. She didn’t care. She just sat there, emotionally exhausted by feelings she didn’t know how to handle—heart tangled up in thoughts that refused to quiet down.

 

She decided to pick up her phone again. She needed to distract herself. After unlocking it, Uzi's fingers hovered over her screen, debating whether to doomscroll or just search up cute photos of dogs wearing sweaters or something equally brainless. Something that didn’t make her think. Something safe.

 

Then, she shut her phone off.

 

Because even that thought came with an annoying little sting—it made her think of how N always watched those dumb dog videos. He’d scroll with this ridiculous smile on his face like it was the most heartwarming thing in the world.

 

It was stupid.

 

He was stupid.

 

Robo-god, she needed to scream.

 

Instead, she just clenched her jaw and squeezed her phone tighter. She was about to unlock it again when she noticed movement beside her—just within the corner of her vision.

 

She didn’t even need to look.

 

V.

 

Of course.

 

The drone dropped onto the edge of her own bed with all the subtlety of a dropped wrench, one leg bouncing lazily, arms loosely crossed over her chest. Uzi kept her attention on her screen. If she didn’t acknowledge her, maybe V would take the hint and move on—

 

“Hey,” V said.

 

Uzi glanced over, brows faintly pinching. Her voice came out casual—maybe a little too casual. “What’s up?”

 

She didn’t care, not really. Not right now. She looked back down at her phone, swiping aimlessly again, trying to end the conversation before it started.

 

Then V asked, in that half-interested, half-knowing tone:


“So… what did N say?”

 

That pulled Uzi’s full attention.

 

She turned her head, looking at V directly now, her confusion plain. “About what?”

 

V met her gaze with a deadpan look, as if she was even less interested in the conversation than Uzi was.

 

Her posture was relaxed, casual, even bored—but Uzi knew better. There was intent there. The way she leaned slightly back, the way her tone lingered just enough to leave things unsaid.

 

Uzi blinked, and her thoughts spun in a flurry. What was she talking about? Had V seen something? Heard something? Was this about earlier? Did V know something?

 

A pit opened up in her chest. This really bugged her this. The crypticness, the vague tension in V’s voice. And more than anything—she hated that part of her was already panicking.

 

She didn’t know what V meant—but the fact that she immediately thought of N, and her being with him in the elevator said everything about where Uzi’s head was at.

 

V gently tapped her fingers against her forearm, her arms still crossed, as if this whole exchange was casual small talk and not subtly needling at Uzi’s rapidly thinning patience.

 

She gave a vague, nonchalant shrug. “About finding out that you-know-who  was your roommate.”

 

Uzi didn’t even need clarification. She immediately knew V was talking about J.

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes. “Wait… how do you know I told N about that?”

 

V just smirked faintly, barely moving.“Lucky guess.”

 

That made Uzi roll her eyes hard enough to feel it in her neck. Right. “Sure.”

 

Whatever. She wasn’t in the mood to play the ‘How much will V act like she knows?’ game. If V wanted an answer, fine. Uzi huffed and muttered, “He said he was gonna talk to you.”

 

V gave a deadpan blink and muttered, “Of course he did.”

 

The words dripped with annoyance, and that did it. Uzi’s brows snapped together, her tone turning sharp. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

 

V didn’t answer at first. Instead, she started fiddling with the thin bracelet around her wrist—idly, distractedly, like the conversation bored her. She didn’t even bother looking up.

 

“He gets like that,” she said eventually. “Panics easy. Can’t solve a problem? He brings it to me.”

 

That… hit Uzi in a weird way. She shifted, posture stiffening, a frown tugging at her mouth. “And what the hell is that supposed to mean?”

 

Now V looked at her, eyes dry and unimpressed. “It means,” she said, slow and deliberate, “that N’s probably freaking out right now because he can’t do anything to protect you. Or whatever. He’s dramatic like that.”

 

Then, under her breath—just loud enough for Uzi to hear:

 

“He’s so fucking sappy.

 

Uzi felt something between a wince and a twitch roll through her. The way V had said that seriously pissed her off. But underneath that… there was something else. A tight, uneasy twist of something she didn’t want to name. Annoyance? Concern? Guilt?

 

She stared at V, trying to piece together if this was just V being V or if she was really onto something. “How would you even know  that?” she snapped. “He doesn’t seem like someone who—worries like that.”

 

It was difficult for Uzi to imagine N overthinking like she did. That just… didn’t fit him.

 

V tilted her head slightly, like the answer should’ve been obvious. “Because I’ve known him for years.”

 

The words landed heavier than Uzi expected. V watched her with that same unreadable expression before adding, like it was just a side note, “Figured he’d told you that already.”

 

He had mentioned it a few times. But it was annoying to be reminded that someone like V apparently knew N on a deeply personal level. Like she even had the capability of even caring about another drone, especially a drone like N.

 

Right?

 

Uzi’s mouth clamped shut, her glare faltering slightly. She looked down, her voice quieter now, muttered more than spoken. “…Right.”

 

She hated how fast that doubt settled in. Hated that V had managed to get under her skin. But more than anything, she hated that she knew V was probably right.

 

Of course N would be freaking out. Of course he’d run to V for help.

 

Uzi sighed, long and low, and rubbed at her forehead.

 

Great. Now she had more to overthink.

 

At this point, now, Uzi had officially hit her limit with this conversation. Talking to V always felt like walking a tightrope of smugness and veiled jabs, and right now, it was only making her mood worse.

 

With a frustrated sigh, she glanced at her phone to check the time—and immediately blinked. Huh. It’d already been about twenty minutes.

 

That meant it was time to meet N again.

 

Her stomach twisted with something light and uninvited—relief? Excitement? Whatever it was, it made her want to groan out loud.

 

What was wrong  with her?

 

Since when did just thinking about seeing N again make her feel like this?

 

That sharp instinct to mentally backpedal kicked in—like a built-in alarm screaming that something was off. Her immediate impulse was to shut the feeling down, to distrust it, or worse, run from it. Emotionally, anyway. Her brain was convinced this wasn’t safe, wasn’t normal. It felt like fight-or-flight—but the enemy wasn’t some threat. It was her own feelings.

 

She inhaled slowly, grounding herself. Alright. Maybe she wasn’t thinking clearly. She was just… not used to this. That’s what made it feel so wrong, so unfamiliar. She could at least pretend to be logical about it, even if every part of her felt like a mess.

 

With that internal scolding dealt, she started standing up. She reached for her phone, pocketing it as she turned to head for the door—

 

“Where are you going?” V asked.

 

Uzi gave her a side glance as she moved past the edge of her bed. Her tone was casual, almost bored. “Downstairs. To see N.”

 

She didn’t care if V knew. What was she gonna do, forbid her? Uzi could almost laugh at the idea.

 

But before she could get a single step past, she felt fingers close tightly around her wrist.

 

V had grabbed her.

 

The hold wasn’t rough enough to hurt, but there was tension behind it—a silent urgency. Her voice came low and clipped.

 

“Wait.”

 

Uzi froze.

 

The sudden spike of anger she felt was immediate and intense, rising so fast she had to physically stop herself from yanking her arm away. Who the hell did V think she was? Grabbing her like that?

 

She turned slowly, eyes sharp, jaw clenched tight.

 

She wanted to shove V’s hand off. Say something that would cut. But—

 

Then she caught a glimpse of V’s expression.

 

Not smug. Not sarcastic. Her mouth was pressed into a tight line, her brows lowered. It wasn’t anger or irritation—it was… something else. Controlled. Serious.

 

And J was still in the room. A few feet away, still talking to Lizzy. Still within earshot. That alone made Uzi rethink lashing out.

 

She exhaled through her nose and pulled her arm back with a measured slowness—calm, casual, like the tension hadn’t just snapped through her bones. “Okay… What’s your problem?” she asked, voice low, eyes narrowing.

 

She wanted answers—but more than that, she wanted control  back. V had crossed a line, and if she didn’t have a good reason for it, Uzi wasn’t going to let her get away with it quietly.

Notes:

Ooooo

Stuffs happening

I feel like this chapter is way better than the last one

And I love how I have the chance to write V’s dialogue more too cuz like, I think I mentioned but she’s one of my favorite characters

I love how she js doesn’t gaf she’s awesome

Or like ik there’s way more to her character than js that but like, I mean outwardly ig

And omg I think it’s so funny cuz like, Uzi doesn’t think V can genuinely care abt others 💔 but now that I think abt it, Uzi hasn’t really interacted with her that much, or like the times she has V always seems so done and then ends up pissing her off 😭🙏

And then I think Uzi sees it as like “oh she treats me like a chore to look out for js cuz N convinced her to” but she’s not even thinking of the fact that it V genuinely did not give a fuck, she wouldn’t have had any regard for anything N told her 💀

Maybe we’ll learn more abt V’s character in the upcoming chapters but who knows 🤷

Ok off topic but not, but I’ve been meaning to say som but I keep forgetting to. Basically, I’m sorry if the whole “oh we can’t have J find out that Uzi knows abt the existence of disassembly drones or she’s gonna kill Uzi ahh oh no” seems really repetitive. I’m trying my hardest to have it not seem repetitive but I feel like it is 💔

It’s only cuz like, I can’t really do much with it at this specific point. It’s been mentioned briefly/has been a major thing overarching thing through the past like, 40+ chapters (like after Uzi found out abt everything in like chapter 25?? Around there) but it recently has been brought up a lot especially considering that J is literally Uzi’s roommate.

The whole reason I can’t do anything rn is cuz like, without spoiling things, there’s kinda being a build up rn. It’s slow paced, but like on purpose cuz imagine if I was like ‘omg first day of the trip, J knows and she tries to kill Uzi oh no 😱’ idfk that’s lame and predictable 💔

So yeah all in all, the reason it’s repetitive is cuz there’s a build up happening rn before something happens (ik that’s vague asf but I can’t say anything more without spoiling it), and I’m sorry if it seems really repetitive, I’m trying my best 😭🙏

I HOPE though, fingers crossed 🤞, that it’ll be worth the wait for again, the events of future chapters

Also note, on the timeline of the trip, it’s the first day, they left at like 7:00 AM got to the hotel around 10:30 AM I think, and now I think it’s a little after lunch time in the current chapter? 12:00 pm something kinda nearing to 1:00 pm? So yeah it hasn’t even been like 6 hours into the trip LMAO 😭😭

We got a ways to go so buckle up yall 💔

Ok that’s everything I have to say. The next chapter will be posted Friday!!! See u guys then 🫶

OH YEAH ALSO happy pride month guys 🤩🤩 don’t think I’ve said that yet so yeah 😫

ANYWAYS BYE!!!

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

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EDIT: GUYS I’m so sorry but I don’t have time to post today 💔 BUT 100% TOMORROW I WILL POST A CHAPTER I PROMISE and it’s so fun too I love it. Hope yall will too 🥲

Chapter 75: Glittery Purple Nail Polish

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

V’s expression—normally unreadable, flat, and indifferent—flickered, just barely, with something almost real. There was a glint in her eyes that didn’t match the rest of her face. Tension. Panic, maybe. It made Uzi blink, momentarily thrown off. Whatever it was, it wasn’t something she’d seen on V before.

 

And then came the quiet, clipped command: “Go sit down. Now.

 

V’s tone wasn’t angry, but there was something biting in the way she ground out the words through clenched teeth, like she was keeping herself from snapping outright. Uzi stared at her for a second, debating whether or not to fight back.

 

She hated being told what to do be practical anyone—and being told what to do by V made her want to shut down. But something about the urgency in her tone made Uzi pause.

 

With an exhale that was more of a surrender than she’d like to admit, Uzi turned and made her way back to her bed. Her movements were sharp, her spine rigid as she sat down, arms loosely crossed like a barrier. She gave V a wary look, silently daring her to make this worth the interruption.

 

V didn't hesitate. “Are you an idiot?”

 

The words were sharp and whispered, but they cut just the same.

 

Uzi’s head jerked slightly at the insult, her brows knitting together in disbelief. “What—? I don’t even know  what I did wrong!” she hissed back, eyes narrowing. “And you're being a total jerk right now, so seriously—what the hell did I do?!”

 

V looked at her like she was exhausted, rolling her eyes with a dramatic slowness that made Uzi's blood boil. She sighed through her nose, regaining that irritatingly calm exterior again—like flipping a switch. The brief moment of emotion was gone, hidden behind that casual mask she always wore.

 

“Look,” V said, voice lowered but steady now. “I get it. You want to go run off and be all lovey-dovey with N or whatever. Cool. Gross, but fine.”

 

Uzi’s eye twitched.

 

V continued, “But maybe think for two seconds about the fact that J  watched you walk in here. You think it’s not going to look suspicions  if you just leave five minutes later?”

 

That made Uzi’s jaw lock.

 

She inhaled sharply, staring down at the floor for a second before forcing herself to meet V’s gaze. She spoke slowly, keeping her voice even, even though she wanted to snap. “First of all, nothing about what me and N are doing is ‘lovey-dovey,’ so I don’t know where the hell you’re getting that from.”

 

V didn’t even respond—just gave her a look. One of those flat, deadpanned stares that practically screamed ‘Sure. Keep lying to yourself.’

 

Uzi clenched her teeth but pressed on, not giving V the satisfaction.

 

“And second of all,” she said, her tone growing more clipped, “how would J even know  I’m going to meet up with him? Seriously. Does she have, like, psychic powers now?”

 

Even as she said it, though, Uzi could feel that tiny seed of doubt worming its way in. J had been eyeing her earlier. Uzi had felt the weight of it the second she walked in. Still, she hated the idea that she had to strategize  every step she made—like this was a game of survival and not just her trying to live her life.

 

Uzi glared at V, eyes sharp. “She has no way of knowing,” she insisted.

 

But even as the words left her mouth, part of her wondered… what if V wasn’t wrong?

 

V let out a low, quiet sigh—not annoyed this time, but more like someone trying to be patient with a particularly slow child. Her voice was even when she spoke, though the edge of exasperation clung to it.

 

“Yeah. I get it,” she said, leaning back on her palms and tilting her head slightly. “But if you somehow haven’t  noticed by now… J sees everything. ” Her eyes flicked toward the far end of the room where J was still engaged in polite conversation with Lizzy, looking completely unbothered. “She’s insanely  observant. You step out of line, she’s the first to notice. Trust me.”

 

That cracked something in Uzi’s chest—not fear, exactly, but a flicker of discomfort that replaced the anger she’d been holding onto. Her posture softened a bit, and she glanced toward the ground, then back at V, brows pinched with uncertainty.

 

“Seriously?” she asked, quieter now. The edge in her voice had dulled, yet she still sounded unamused.

 

V gave her a flat look, lips pressing together like she was biting back yet another eye-roll. “ Duh.

 

She gestured vaguely with one hand, bracelets clinking as she moved. “Knowing J, she’d probably make up some  excuse to follow you. Pretend she left something somewhere. Claim she wants fresh air. Whatever. Doesn’t even have to be a good excuse.”

 

Uzi’s expression tightened, concern now clearly etched in her features.

 

V paused for a second, thinking aloud. “And even if she doesn’t  follow you? She’ll obviously still notice you’re not here. And when we go downstairs, she’ll definitely keep an eye out for you.”

 

V leaned forward a little, meeting Uzi’s gaze directly. “You show up anywhere near N? Even if it is just in the lobby? She won’t need to see anything. She’ll connect the dots.”

 

Uzi let out an aggravated groan, rubbing her hands down her face. “Ugh. Fine.

 

There was a beat of silence. Then, more quietly, Uzi hesitated before speaking again. Her voice was lower, more reluctant—like she didn’t even want to hear herself say it.

 

“…I told N I’d go down,” she muttered, glancing to the side. “I promised him.”

 

She sighed and slumped back into her bed, leaning her weight against the headboard. Her eyes closed for a second as she pinched the bridge of her nose, her voice sounding tired and guilty. “He’s probably already left his room and is looking for me. And now I feel like an asshole.”

 

The admission sat heavy in the air, and for a moment Uzi didn’t say anything. She didn’t know why she told V that— of all drones.

 

Maybe it was because she needed to let it out. Maybe it was because, despite everything, V wasn’t entirely wrong. And, even if she didn’t like to admit it… she kind of didn’t hate talking to her right now. It was strange. Annoying. Vulnerable.

 

And it made her feel a little less alone.

 

V gave a small shrug, like none of this was worth getting worked up over. “He’ll be fine,” she said, tone flippant as ever. “Sure, he’s probably panicking right now, thinking either you’re in trouble, or you hate him, or whatever , but he’ll get over it.”

 

The words hit Uzi wrong. Her jaw clenched slightly, a sharp look darting in V’s direction.


“Yeah. Thanks,” Uzi muttered, sarcasm laced under the irritation. “Totally made me feel better.”

 

V huffed, not even bothering to defend herself. “Hey, I’m trying  here,” she said, holding up her hands in mock surrender. “This is what my best looks like.”

 

The tension hung for a second, the silence stretching between them—until V broke it with something completely out of left field.

 

“Let me paint your nails.”

 

Uzi blinked. Her head tilted slightly, brows furrowing as she tried to register what she just heard. “…What?”

 

V, utterly unbothered, looked her dead in the eye. “Because J saw me tell you to sit down. She’s probably getting suspicious.”

 

Her voice dropped, just barely, as she added, “She’s been trying to eavesdrop the entire time, by the way.”

 

Uzi stiffened slightly at that. Her eyes widened a little—just a flicker—but enough to betray the creeping unease that was now curling at the back of her mind.

 

She instinctively glanced toward the other side of the room, not turning fully but just enough to catch the outline of J still seated across from Lizzy. J’s posture was relaxed. Maybe even too relaxed.

 

V didn’t elaborate. She simply got up, smooth and casual, brushing invisible lint off her pants like none of this was unusual.

 

She walked past Uzi, her tone cool and unaffected as she tossed out over her shoulder, “Also, if J asks—we’ve been talking about the trip this whole time.”

 

And just like that, she was across the room.

 

Uzi stayed frozen for a moment, watching V walk up to Lizzy, her voice muffled now as she casually asked for nail polish. But Uzi barely heard it. Her mind had gone quiet in the most awful way.

 

She’d let her guard down.

 

She knew J was there—had known the whole time—but she’d gotten too caught up in the moment. The conversation. The emotions.

 

And now she was second-guessing every word she’d said aloud. What if she had been too loud? What if J had picked up on something?

 

Her stomach twisted with dread. Every inch of her wanted to shut down and spiral—but she didn’t let herself. She clenched her fists, breathed in through her nose, and stood up.

 

Now wasn’t the time to panic. If J had heard something, she'd deal with it. But for now… she needed to act normal.

 

So, with stiff but determined movements, Uzi stepped out of bed and began making her way toward V, keeping her expression neutral, even as her thoughts churned like a storm underneath.

 

As Uzi made her way to the table, her movements were deliberate—measured. She could feel the pressure building in her joints, the weight of unease crawling up her spine, but she kept her expression neutral.

 

She noticed Lizzy pass her with a bright, oblivious air, humming softly as she made her way to the bag on her bed. She then rifled through it and pulled out a small pouch—nail polish, probably.

 

Uzi barely spared her a glance.

 

Her focus was on the table ahead.

 

There were four chairs—two by the wall, two facing the window. J was already seated on the left, her posture effortlessly composed, one leg crossed over the other, the picture of relaxed attention. V had taken the seat to the right, casually leaning against the table’s edge like she couldn’t be bothered.

 

Uzi moved quickly, choosing the chair furthest from J without hesitation. She didn’t want to be near her, didn’t want to give her the chance to look too closely—literally or figuratively.

 

As Uzi adjusted her seat, dragging it out just enough to sit and keep her distance, J’s voice slid into the air like a quiet blade.

 

“You two seemed really into whatever you were talking about,” she said. Light tone. Easy smile. “What was it?”

 

She asked it like she didn’t care, like it was just polite curiosity—but Uzi knew better.

 

J didn’t do polite curiosity. Every word from her mouth was weighed, sharpened. There was no such thing as casual when it came to J.

 

Uzi didn’t let herself flinch, though the muscles in her jaw tightened involuntarily. Her eyes flicked up to meet J’s, just briefly, before she dropped them again with a practiced indifference.

 

“Just talking about the trip,” she said, tone as flat and dry as she could manage.

 

She forced the corners of her mouth into the faintest hint of a smirk, as if it was the most boring thing in the world. The words were delivered carefully, no waver, no edge—but even still, she could feel the way her stomach twisted afterward. The weight of J’s attention was like a pressure on her chest. Every instinct told her not to slip, not to give anything away.

 

Inside, Uzi was wound tight. She was trying so hard not to overthink it, not to stress, but the silence that followed her answer felt like a test. One she wasn’t sure she passed. So she crossed her arms, leaned back just enough to seem relaxed, and stared out the window.

 

If J was going to play games, then fine—Uzi would play them better.

 

J didn’t miss a beat. “What about it?” she asked, her voice smooth and offhanded, like she was just keeping the conversation going. But the way her eyes lingered on Uzi—still, sharp, just a touch too focused—told another story entirely.

 

V stepped in before Uzi had to think too hard. She shrugged lazily, leaning an elbow on the table. “What we’re doing the next few days,” she said, sounding thoroughly bored, like even forming the sentence was effort.

 

Uzi nodded along like it was nothing. “I’m kind of excited for the free day,” she added, forcing a lightness to her voice. She pushed the words out casually, like she wasn’t bracing for J’s reaction with every syllable.

 

J paused. Just long enough for it to be noticeable.

 

Then she smiled—pleasant, friendly, completely unreadable. “Good to know,” she said softly.

 

Her eyes stayed on Uzi for a beat longer than necessary. The smile didn’t quite reach them.

 

Uzi felt the words snag in her mind like a hook. Good to know. What the hell did that mean?! Why say that? Why not just agree or nod? That wasn’t a normal response, was it?

 

Her internal alarm bells started blaring. She tried to fight it down, but her brain was already picking the sentence apart like a threat analysis. Did she say something wrong? Should she have lied? Was she being too obvious? She bit the inside of her cheek and stared ahead, trying to keep her expression from slipping.

 

But before she could spiral any deeper, V sighed, clearly done with this exchange. “I couldn’t care less about any of this stuff,” she muttered, slouching deeper into her chair. “Only reason I came was to boost my GPA.”

 

The tension eased slightly. J laughed, light and easy, like this was all a perfectly normal, lighthearted conversation. Which it should’ve been. “You can’t fool me, V. I know you care more than you let on.”

 

V didn’t even blink. She rolled her eyes and deadpanned, “Sure,” in the flattest voice possible.

 

J and V talking to each other let Uzi breathe for half a second. Watching V act completely indifferent was grounding, somehow—she made everything seem less dire, even when it was. Still, Uzi’s thoughts wouldn’t settle. J’s comment— good to know —kept echoing in her head.

 

Was it just a throwaway line?

 

Or was J confirming something? Filing away Uzi’s words like a piece of evidence?

 

Uzi’s fingers tapped restlessly against the arm of her chair. She hated this. She hated feeling like she had to play a game she never asked to be a part of—especially when she didn’t know the rules.

 

Before anyone could follow up on J and V’s exchange, Lizzy slid into the empty chair beside J with a practiced grace, tossing a small pouch onto the table. She looked proud of herself, like she’d just arrived to save the day.

 

Uzi blinked at the little bag, then raised a brow. “You seriously brought that?” she asked, leaning slightly forward. “Feels kinda random.”

 

Lizzy giggled, the kind of bubbly sound that seemed rehearsed, and waved a hand in the air. “Oh please. A girl always comes prepared,” she said with a wink, already unzipping the pouch like she’d been waiting for someone to ask. “You never know when there’ll be a nail emergency.”

 

From inside the bag, she pulled out a few small bottles, the colors already obnoxiously bright—neon pink, glittery gold, pastel green. It looked like a unicorn had exploded.

 

Then she glanced at Uzi and chirped, “Heads up though—I don’t have any black, so you’ll have to make do.”

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard. “…What makes you think I would want black?”

 

Lizzy shrugged with a bright, nonchalant smile. “I mean, look at you. All dark and gloomy and brooding . Just seemed like your thing.”

 

She gestured vaguely at Uzi, like her entire personality could be summed up by the shade of a nail polish bottle.

 

“And me ?” Lizzy continued, placing a hand dramatically over her chest, “I’m all about standing out. Being vibrant! I don’t even own black polish. I’d never use it.”

 

Uzi just stared at her, unimpressed. Her face didn’t move, except for a single blink, slow and exasperated. Any other day, she might’ve had the energy to be mildly offended by the comment—or maybe snapped back with something biting. But right now? She couldn’t even bother.

 

What did it matter what Lizzy thought she ‘seemed’ like? The girl barely knew her. And frankly, Uzi didn’t care to be understood by someone who probably thought glitter was a personality trait.

 

She leaned back slightly, resting her elbow on the table. Her voice was flat as she muttered, “Wow. Thanks.

 

The sarcasm dripped from every syllable, but Lizzy either didn’t notice or didn’t care, already sorting through the colors like Uzi wasn’t even there.

 

Uzi glanced past her toward V for a brief second, silently wondering how the hell she ended up in a conversation about nail polish of all things, surrounded by two drones who irritated her in wildly different ways—and one who made her nervous enough to want to crawl out of her own chassis.

 

V finally broke the silence with a dry, “Hey, toss me a few.”

 

She didn’t bother looking up as she spoke, just held out a hand expectantly. Lizzy, still in her own world, happily obliged—sliding a few bottles toward her with an extra flourish like she was presenting fine wine.

 

Then, without skipping a beat, Lizzy plucked a glittery pink shade from the bunch and held it up to the light. “This one’s so me,” she said with a proud grin.

 

Uzi’s attention shifted to V, who now had a small cluster of bottles in her hands. V stared at them like they were just another task to complete. There was no interest in her eyes—just that familiar half-lidded boredom, like she’d rather be anywhere else but here.

 

A sigh slipped out of V before she asked, flatly, “What color do you want?”

 

Uzi looked down at the sad selection in front of her. Teal. Neon pink. Glittery purple.

 

Well. That was easy.

 

She pointed at the purple. “That one.”

 

V didn’t respond, not even a nod. She just reached for the bottle with a kind of mechanical detachment, like she was following instructions on autopilot.

 

Uzi couldn’t help but mentally scoff. V was acting like this was a punishment. She was the one who started  this whole weird cover-up session, and now she was treating painting nails like she was a factory worker on her fifth shift in a row.

 

As V unscrewed the cap, Uzi muttered under her breath, “You could try acting like you care. You’re the one who offered.”

 

Before she could tack on ‘ well, more like forced,’ V shot her a look. Not angry—just a warning. One of those glances that told Uzi to shut it before she made things worse. Her lips pressed into a thin line.

 

Then V reached forward and grabbed Uzi’s hand. Not rough or rushed—surprisingly gentle, actually. But her face said otherwise: her brows low, her mouth flat, like this was the most exhausting thing she’d done all day.

 

Uzi stared at her for a second, confused by the weird mix of tenderness and visible disdain. She opened her mouth to say something else, maybe poke at her just to be annoying—

 

—and then she felt it. A sharp jab to her shin under the table.

 

Not enough to make her cry out, but enough to make her eyes widen. Uzi clenched her jaw instantly and barely resisted the urge to kick V back with every ounce of irritation she felt.

 

J was right there. Just a few feet away. Still talking with Lizzy and half-listening, her presence like a shadow looming over the table. She couldn’t risk causing a scene.

 

Uzi slowly turned to V, who was still focused on painting her nail like nothing happened.  Her face was blank. Her expression screamed innocence, but Uzi knew better.

 

Her thoughts were a whirlwind of frustration. Unbelievable. She wanted to curse at her. She wanted to yank her hand away and say, Forget it, I’ll do it myself.

 

But she couldn’t.

 

Instead, she breathed through her nose, slowly, and forced herself to stay still. This was stupid. The whole situation was ridiculous. But they needed the distraction, and if that meant glittery nail polish and getting shin-kicked by V, then… fine.

 

She’d survive. Maybe.

 

Uzi bit the inside of her cheek, her jaw tensing as a sharp wave of irritation surged through her. She knew  she shouldn’t take it personally—V wasn’t being cruel for the sake of it. She was trying to keep the cover intact, make sure J didn’t think anything was off. But even knowing that didn’t make it any less frustrating.

 

Uzi could still feel that dull ache in her shin. It was petty. It was annoying. And it didn’t make her feel any better about the fact that she was stuck here playing dress-up while J sat two feet away, lurking like a hawk.

 

She tried to steady her breathing. One second. Two seconds.

 

And then it hit her—wait, why was she here again? They were covering up for the fact that Uzi had tried to leave, and V had literally grabbed her and commanded her to stay. J had probably noticed, or at least V made it seem like she did.

 

But why was she trying to leave again?

 

She had been planning on meeting with N. Even if he was a little worried, he’d be fine because she—

 

Oh shit.

 

She never texted N.

 

The thought slammed into her like a truck. Her whole body went stiff. Her memory scrambled backwards—yes, she’d said she’d text him if something came up. And then she got caught up with V, and now she was sitting here like an idiot with purple glittery nail polish drying on her hands, and he was probably still downstairs waiting for her like some hopeful idiot.

 

Oh my Robo-god.

 

Her heart lurched into her throat. She needed to fix this. Now.

 

But V was still painting carefully, one finger at a time, moving as though this wasn’t a complete crisis. But, Uzi couldn’t blame her. She didn’t even know… not that she would care if she did, though.

 

Uzi tried to sound casual. “Hey,” she said, keeping her voice low, “can I go to the bathroom in a minute?”

 

“No,” V replied flatly, not even looking up from her work. “I’m not done yet.”

 

Uzi inhaled sharply through her nose. She barely kept herself from groaning out loud. “I didn’t mean right now,” she muttered, jaw tight. “Just after you’re done.”

 

That finally made V glance up at her, skeptical. “You have to wait for them to dry,” she said evenly. “I’m not repainting them if you smudge everything.”

 

Uzi leaned slightly forward, forcing herself to keep her voice steady. “I won’t. I’m careful. I paint my nails at home all the time, I know how to keep them from smudging.”

 

V gave a small shrug, as if to say, fine, whatever. “Suit yourself.”

 

She went back to painting with the same slow, methodical precision.

 

Uzi sat there, tense as a coiled spring. Her fingers were being held delicately, but her thoughts were a mess—swarming with dread. What if N thought she bailed? Or worse—what if he was stressing out, spiraling through a hundred worst-case scenarios?

 

She clenched her jaw again, this time to stop herself from blurting something irrational. There was nothing she could do right now. Not without drawing attention. Not with J seated so close, still casually watching the room like nothing got past her.

 

So instead, Uzi stayed still—fuming quietly, brain racing—while glittery purple nail polish slowly dried onto her nails.

Notes:

I actually love this chapter sm it’s so fun

And a lot of shit is happening too so that’s so great that I finally got to write it down.

In the thought process behind it, or like way before I even started writing the new ore city arc, I was like “there should be a part where Uzi is forced to paint her nails in the hotel room, that’d be so fun.” And this is the product of that thought ig? 😭

Oh and also, idk if anyone was thinking this, but if anyone is like ‘wait I thought they didn’t have nails because they’re robots’ WELL LETS JS PRETEND THEY DO OKAY 😭🤚 for the sake of the story 💔 they still have like, 4 fingers and stuff ig and they’re *obviously* still drones, but in this universe they also have nails ig idk

And if I didn’t do this idk what I would’ve done. Made V tell Uzi to stay back and play connect 4? Chess? 😭💔 idfk

Also this way Lizzy can also be relevant too cuz ofc she’s the person to bring nail polish on a 5 day school trip 💀 like girl

(Not even gonna lie though I’d probably do the same thing if I didn’t have my nails done and I remembered to bring it 💔)

And ofc Lizzy doesn’t own black nail polish too- or like I see her as maybe owning it but js not wanting to bring it with her ig. Yk those people who think only ‘emo people’ wear black nail polish? Yeah, Lizzy’s one of them 🥲

I love writing Lizzy’s character too I think it’s so interesting. Cuz ig she’s like, one of those petty stereotypical-cheerleader bully kind of girl 💔 or js fucking, Regina George over here 😭

Ik that kind of person is commonly dramatized in media, but tbh irl people like that are js like, jerks but indirectly. That’s also how I’m trying to portray her so she has a bit more character ig instead of js being a stereotype entirely. Like, this will seem off topic but stay with me, so idk if anyone else reading this dresses more in an ‘alternative’ kinda style. But not like “2020 scenecore uwu” type shit but like, actually alternative, like one of the umbrella terms ranging from true-grunge, trad-goth, punk, scene, etc. Me personally I dress more like, scene and stuff, but NOT scenecore, I promise those are WAY different 🥲 generally I like 2000’as fashion and like I have the scene bangs and everything AHH I love it sm. But back to my point, when you dress like that, there’s always people who are gonna poke fun at you, but not even directly. Saying shit like ‘do you really think that looks good’ or seeing an old photo of you and being like ‘you used to be so pretty’ LIKE BRO 😭 and then for some reason they think it’s worth their time to talk shit abt u behind your back. And im not even saying this cuz like, ‘oh I was bullied poor me’ I literally don’t gaf abt what people think abt me 💀 but I’ve known people like that, and it’s so annoying because can you js think before you speak?? Like I get you’re not trying to be an asshole but can you not tell that I clearly don’t take what you’re saying as a compliment? Focus on studying and stop talking shit abt me for being more confident than you LMFAO

But yeah my ENTIRE point in saying that was, (back to murder drones) Lizzy and Uzi are literally the embodiment of what I see that as. And not even in a projecting kinda way cuz I SWEAR I’m not tryna project (this time 💔) it’s more of like, a relatable thing, if that makes sense.

But even so, I don’t see Lizzy as js one dimensional and js a flat out bitch cuz there’s still more to her. I don’t think it’s like ‘oh she’s self conscious so she picks on Uzi’ cuz she probably doesn’t even think abt the shit she says half the time and she doesn’t give a flying fuck (unless God forbid Uzi confront her or talk back, because then she’d get super defensive)

Maybe it’s js the way she was raised. Maybe she js was always around others that talked shit and gossiped abt everyone and she js ended up acting the same, since you kinda become who u surround yourself with. Or maybe it stems from parental issues or lack there of. Maybe her mom is also a gossip girl (one of *those* moms who always causes problems with everyone else’s mom 😭) or maybe her mom makes fun of her and makes her feel less than, so subconsciously she makes comments and talks shit abt everyone else to feel better abt herself.

Like there’s js sm that goes into a character that molds them into who they are ig.

Ok im gonna stop rambling now cuz I literally have no point 💀

Did yall notice the subtle foreshadowing? I won’t say anything else, if you figured it out then you figured it out ig 😭

Also did u think Uzi was js gonna go back downstairs and have a bunch of moments with N and stuff? Tried not to make it predictable 😫 I like this route way more

That’s abt all I have to say. Next chapter will be released either Tuesday or Wednesday.

Also sorry for releasing the chapter late- mb 😭💔

BYEEE

Chapter 76: Sappy

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The second V capped the polish and set the bottle aside, Uzi quickly pulled her hands back, lifting them to examine the drying shimmer on her nails.

 

Outwardly, she feigned disinterest, nodding as if only to acknowledge the job was done. But inside, her mind was spiraling. The panic hadn’t subsided—it had only gotten louder.

 

I need to text him. Now.

 

She glanced at V, her voice barely above a murmur. “Thanks.”

 

V’s lips barely moved. “Don’t mention it.”

 

The way she said it made Uzi pause for half a second. That didn’t sound remotely polite—it sounded like a quiet warning. A reminder. Keep your mouth shut and never bring this up again.

 

Uzi didn’t argue. She simply stood up from her chair. “I’ll be right back,” she said evenly, not even looking at J.

 

Then she turned and walked. Slowly. Deliberately. Every part of her screamed to sprint, to bolt back to her bed and check her phone and make sure she hadn’t ruined everything with N. But she couldn’t afford to make it obvious. Not with J sitting behind her, likely still watching.

 

Don’t look like you’re in a rush. Don’t even think about rushing.

 

Her hands stayed tucked in her pockets, posture relaxed, steps calm. She kept her gaze fixed ahead, not daring to glance back—but she could feel J’s stare. That invisible weight pressed between her shoulders. Whether it was real or just her spiraling thoughts, she didn’t know. But she didn’t risk it.

 

Once she reached her bed, she moved as casually as she could, dropping one hand out of her pocket to pluck up her phone from where it sat on the blanket. She didn’t even flick the screen on. Just slipped it into her jacket pocket like it was routine—like she didn’t care at all.

 

But her heart was pounding.

 

Please let him still be waiting.

 

She then made her way to the bathroom. She opened the door gently, still trying not to seem rushed. But the second the bathroom door clicked shut behind her, Uzi bolted.

 

She practically threw herself across the room, flipping the toilet lid down and dropping onto it like it was the only stable thing in the world.

 

Her fingers scrambled for her phone, already halfway out of her pocket. Her hands were shaking as she fumbled with the lock screen—too fast, too panicked. Wrong password.

 

Damn it.

 

She tried again. Wrong. Her thumb slipped from the nervous sweat on her fingertips “Come on—” she whispered under her breath, teeth clenched.

 

On the third try, the screen finally unlocked, and she yanked open the messages app.

 

Her stomach dropped the moment she saw N’s name.

 

Three unread messages.

 

Her thumb hovered over the thread for a single breath—then tapped.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [12:22 PM] : Hey, where are you?

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [12:26 PM] :   Is everything okay?

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [12:34 PM] :   Uzi?

 

The last one hurt the worst. Just her name. No punctuation. No sarcasm, no rambling, no emojis. Just quiet, confused worry.

 

Uzi’s fingers were already moving. She typed so fast she nearly dropped the phone.

 

Uzi [12:45 PM]: im so sorry- everythings fine, i promise. couldn’t get away but i ll be down soon

 

She hesitated, thumb lingering over the screen. It wasn’t enough.

 

So she typed again.

 

Uzi [12:45 PM]: ill explain when i see you. js dont leave please

 

Her thumb hit send.

 

It felt like the longest three seconds of her life—but then the three dots appeared. N was typing.

 

Her heart stuttered.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [12:45 PM] : Okay! I’m by the elevators.

 

That was it. Just that. Simple. No guilt-tripping, no questions. He didn’t even ask what happened. He was still there—still waiting.

 

Relief hit her so suddenly she had to blink hard to stop the stinging behind her eyes. It wasn’t like anything had been fixed, not really. But knowing he hadn’t left, knowing he still wanted to see her even after being left in silence for nearly twenty minutes—it eased the awful knot in her chest just a little.

 

Uzi let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding, the exhale trembling ever so slightly as she dropped her phone into her lap. Her hands hovered over it, her fingers curling slowly, like she wasn’t quite sure what to do with them now.

 

Why was she so shaken over this?

 

Now that she thought about it—nothing really  happened. There was no confrontation, no fallout. She hadn’t gotten caught.

 

And yet her chest still felt tight, like someone had wrung it out and hadn’t bothered to let go. All because N had sent a few worried messages.

 

Why did that matter so much? Why was the idea of him sitting there, alone and wondering if something was wrong, this unbearable?

 

The feeling was unfamiliar—and frankly, she hated that. It was too raw, too vulnerable, and it made her feel completely out of control. Caring this much? That wasn’t something she was used to.

 

She swallowed thickly and stood. Even though she hadn’t actually used the bathroom, she flushed the toilet out of pure paranoia. If J was still suspicious, the sound might help sell the illusion. She couldn’t afford to be careless now, not when she was so close to slipping away.

 

Next, she crossed to the sink and turned on the water, letting it run while she stared into the mirror. Her own reflection stared back—expression tight, eyes ringed with a little more shadow than she remembered. The eye bags had always been there, sure, but maybe now they looked a little heavier. Or maybe she was just noticing them again for the first time in a while.

 

She reached her hands under the faucet, letting the water hit her palms for barely a second before shutting it off again. Then she dragged her damp fingers down the front of her shirt to dry them, not caring about the faint smudge they left behind.

 

With a final glance at herself, she pulled open the bathroom door.

 

Okay. Now she just had to get out of here. She didn’t want to sneak—it would only draw more attention. She needed something natural, effortless.

 

And then it hit her.

 

Lunch. She already had plans to meet her friends downstairs around this time anyway—technically, it was the truth. She didn’t need to make up some elaborate excuse, and more importantly, J couldn’t question something that was already scheduled.

 

Uzi’s heart thudded in her chest with cautious hope as she stepped out. Finally, for once, something might actually work in her favor.

 

When she was fully out the bathroom, Uzi lifted her phone just enough so that the screen was visible from across the room. She tapped the side button like she was checking the time—an excuse, something casual.

 

Then she looked up, letting her gaze land on the table where J, V, and Lizzy were still gathered. Their conversation had dulled to quiet chatter, and none of them seemed especially interested in her… yet.

 

So she spoke, keeping her voice light. “I’m gonna go meet my friends for lunch. I’ll be gone for a bit.”

 

Lizzy’s smile was instant and sugary, the kind that made Uzi wonder briefly if she actually cared or just liked hearing herself speak. Obviously the latter. “Ooh, fun! Have a good time!”

 

V didn’t even lift her head. Her response was a half-hearted wave at best—or maybe just a shift in posture that vaguely acknowledged Uzi’s existence. Predictable.

 

But J… J didn’t smile. She didn’t nod. She just stared. And for the briefest second, her lips curved—not into a friendly smile, but something much smaller. Subtler. Sharper.

 

A smirk.

 

Uzi’s stomach twisted. She refused to flinch under that look, but it lingered with her even as she turned away. She gave the group a quick, dismissive wave, not even bothering to look back.

 

Then she slipped out the door.

 

The second she was in the hallway, her body kicked into motion. She walked fast—brisk, purposeful, but not enough to draw attention. She forced her posture to stay relaxed even though her pulse was climbing.

 

Every step down that corridor felt like shedding another layer of stress, but she couldn’t let her guard drop until she saw him.

 

When she finally arrived to the elevators, though, N was no where to be found. He said he’d be waiting by the elevators, right?

 

So why wasn’t he here?

 

Uzi was to the left of the elevators, so she walked a little further right. To said right, the corridor unfolded into a glass-walled alcove—some sort of observation lounge.

 

Daylight poured through a floor-to-ceiling window that spanned the entire end wall, bleaching the slate-grey carpet a few shades lighter. Close to the glass sat a low walnut coffee table ringed by a weathered leather sofa, two matching armchairs set against the side wall, and a pair of potted fiddle-leaf figs that added a splash of green to all the chrome and cream.

 

The city view outside the window stole centre stage. Even at midday, New Ore’s skyline looked electric: knife-sharp spires of steel, terraces packed tight with neon billboards, rivers of traffic glittering in stop-start ribbons far below. Heat haze shimmered over the rooftops; hundreds of drones were visible on the side walls on their daily commutes,  and somewhere down there a siren wailed then vanished into the hum of engines.

 

Uzi swallowed a quiet gasp. Considering she lived in a small town, she’d only ever read about a metropolis that never truly slept—seeing it alive at eye level was an otherworldly experience.

 

The sounds of approaching footsteps broke the spell. She glanced left. There—half hidden by the nearest armchair—N unfolded from his seat and stepped into the light.

 

He must have been admiring the view, too; the relief in his shoulders was obvious the moment he spotted her. He offered a small lopsided grin—equal parts thank-robo-god-you’re-here and sorry-I-panicked.

 

Uzi felt heat prickle across the bridge of her nose. Guilt for keeping him waiting, an ache of fondness she still didn’t know how to file away, and—beneath it all—a sharp memory of J’s smirk upstairs.

 

N moved with a sort of quiet urgency, his steps quick but careful, like he wasn’t sure whether to reach for her or stop himself short. His arms twitched slightly at his sides—like part of him had been ready to pull her into a hug but hesitated at the last second.

 

Instead, he halted in front of her, eyes wide with concern, his voice already spilling out.

 

“Uzi,” he said, breath catching on her name, “I was seriously worried. You said you’d text me, and then you didn’t—and I didn’t know if something happened, but I couldn’t just knock on your door if it was nothing—”

 

He was speaking fast, the words practically tripping over each other, but there was no frustration in his tone. Just confusion. Unease. Like his mind had gone through every worst-case scenario and was still trying to shake them off.

 

Uzi let out a slow breath, not quite a sigh. Her hand drifted to the back of her neck and rubbed there, a familiar motion that came with discomfort and guilt. She couldn’t meet his eyes just yet—she glanced past him, then toward the floor.

 

“I forgot,” she admitted quietly. “I just... forgot to text you.”

 

N’s brows knit slightly, concern still hanging in his expression. But then something seemed to click, and his face softened. His shoulders dropped a little, the tension bleeding out of them. He let out a breath that almost sounded like a short laugh, and spoke more gently this time.

 

“It’s okay. Really,” he said, more to reassure her than himself. “I guess I was just being kind of dramatic.”

 

That finally got Uzi to look back up at him. Her gaze steadied on his, serious now, almost firm.

 

“No,” she said. “I get it. I would’ve freaked out too—especially considering that I was in a room with J.”


She tried to keep her voice even, but her words came with a weight behind them, unspoken but clear. That room wasn’t just uncomfortable. It was a cage. And N knew it.

 

He gave a small nod, like he understood exactly what she meant. And Uzi, now that the panic had ebbed slightly, felt a strange blend of guilt, relief, and... something else she couldn’t name. Something soft and persistent that had grown stronger the second she saw him waiting for her.

 

N glanced down at the floor, fidgeting with his hands as he gathered his thoughts. Then he looked up again, his eyes meeting Uzi’s with gentle curiosity. “So… how’s that going?” he asked, his voice softer now—cautious, even.

 

Uzi shrugged, shifting her weight slightly. “As good as it can,” she said, the edge of weariness in her tone giving it away. Her eyes flicked toward the window, then back at him. “V’s annoying, but… at least she’s helping. Kind of.”

 

N’s expression changed at the mention of V—he perked up slightly, brows lifting with interest. “She’s been talking to you more?”

 

Uzi paused, barely suppressing an instinctive eye roll as her mind flashed back to earlier.

 

V’s bitchy tone calling her an idiot for trying to leave, that offhanded ‘lovey-dovey’ comment about her and N, and of course the casual way she kicked her under the table like it was nothing. Uzi’s jaw tensed faintly. She blinked slowly, composing herself before she replied.

 

“Yeah,” she said flatly, “we’ve… talked.”

 

N didn’t seem to pick up on her clipped tone—either he missed it entirely, or he chose not to dig. Most likely, he just didn’t notice.

 

His expression remained thoughtful as he tilted his head. “She still helping? Y’know—keeping J from getting too suspicious?”

 

Uzi exhaled through her nose, unimpressed. “I guess. Technically. But she’s not exactly making it easy to like her.”

 

N smiled a little at that, almost sheepishly. “Maybe you’ll get used to her.”

 

Uzi raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms, looking unimpressed. “I doubt it,” she muttered. There was no malice in her tone, but it was flat and dry, like she wasn’t even trying to pretend otherwise. The idea of getting used to V felt more like a threat than a possibility.

 

Still, even in her annoyance, there was something grounding in being here—just talking to N again, even if the topic was V. At least she could breathe again.

 

The moment stretched between them in silence, calm and unspoken—until Uzi glanced sideways at N and asked quietly, “Wanna head down now?”

 

N gave a quick nod. “Yeah.”

 

But then, as they moved toward the elevators, he hesitated, his voice softer. “Do you think the others are already down there? Since… y’know, we didn’t meet up early like we planned?”

 

His words weren’t accusatory, not even slightly. But Uzi still felt a sting of guilt creep in—an involuntary weight that settled in her chest. She knew he didn’t mean anything by it, but the reminder alone was enough. She hadn’t just missed their time together—she’d left him waiting, worrying.

 

“Probably,” she murmured after a beat, trying to sound casual. “If I had to guess, Emily and Rebecca are already down there. They’re usually early.”

 

N nodded again, accepting that without question. “Yeah, that makes sense.”

 

The two stood in quiet anticipation as the elevator finally arrived. When the doors slid open, Uzi felt a small wave of relief that it was empty. She really disliked   being stuck in those small boxes with strangers—awkward glances, tense silences, forced smiles. No thank you.

 

They stepped in. The doors closed behind them, sealing off the rest of the world.

 

Uzi reached for the button to the first floor—her hand just inches away—when she heard N quietly speak up.

 

“Uzi…?”

 

Something about his tone made her pause, her finger hovering mid-air.

 

She turned toward him, brows faintly knit. “Yeah?”

 

N didn’t respond right away. Instead, he took a few slow steps toward her, his expression unreadable but soft.

 

Then, without another word, he wrapped his arms around her.

 

It wasn’t tentative. It wasn’t gentle. It was the kind of hug that came from worry—tight, solid, like he had been holding something in and it had finally spilled over.

 

Uzi froze at first, surprised by the suddenness of it. Her eyes widened, but she didn’t pull away. After a heartbeat, her arms lifted and settled around him in return.

 

“N?” she asked, confused, voice muffled slightly against his chest.

 

He didn’t answer right away. Instead, he lowered his head slightly, his voice barely above a whisper.

 

“I’m just… really glad you’re okay.”

 

Uzi blinked. Something about how quietly he said it made it land harder than if he’d shouted. There was something raw in his voice, something that tugged at her.

 

But her thoughts were cut off abruptly when she noticed—he was squeezing her so tightly now that she had to cough slightly and press her hand awkwardly against his arm.

 

“You’re… suffocating… me—,” she strained under her breath.

 

N immediately loosened his hold and pulled back, his face full of sudden alarm. “Sorry,” he said, sheepish.

 

His arms were still loosely around her shoulders, but his posture shifted, slightly hunched like he felt guilty.

 

He hesitated, then spoke again. “I just… I really thought something happened. You didn’t text, and you were up there for a while, and…” He trailed off.

 

Uzi looked at him quietly, her arms still halfway around his waist. There was a strange twist in her chest—not quite guilt anymore. Something warmer. Something unfamiliar.

 

It was quiet now—except for the faint creaking of the elevator beneath as it stayed still—and the fact that her thoughts were anything but silent.

 

This… was strange. Unexpected. But not in a way that made her uncomfortable.

 

Usually she was the one who initiated stuff like this—awkward hand-holding, hugs when no one else was looking, other… things.

 

But this time, N had acted first. It had caught her off guard, sure, but it wasn’t unwelcome. If anything, she was kind of… flustered.

 

When he pulled away fully, his hands naturally followed hers, trailing gently down her arms until they settled around her hands. She hadn’t even fully registered that she was holding onto him until she looked down and saw it—his hands cupped inside hers like something fragile she wasn’t ready to let go of just yet.

 

A part of her wanted to hug him again.

 

But suddenly, the elevator shifted, and then came the ding of the elevator, a soft reminder that the world hadn’t stopped for their moment. They were moving—descending floor by floor—and soon, those doors would open. It wasn’t the time.

 

Her gaze flicked up to him, and her voice was quiet when she finally spoke. “Well,” she murmured, “I’m here now. So you don’t have to worry anymore.”

 

N gave her a small, relieved smile in return—warm, genuine, without a trace of resentment for the wait she’d put him through. It made her chest tighten in that weird way again.

 

Uzi gave his hands a light squeeze, brief but intentional, before finally letting go. Her hands dropped to her sides as she stepped toward the center of the elevator, trying to collect herself.

 

Her face felt warm. Uncomfortably so. And the more she tried to ignore it, the more her mind replayed the whole thing—the way he’d hugged her without thinking, how tightly he’d held on, the sound of his voice when he said he was glad she was okay.

 

She exhaled slowly, pressing her lips together. Her face was burning now—she needed to regain her composure so she didn’t accidentally crumple.

 

N stepped up beside her, standing quietly, his hands now loosely folded in front of him.

 

Neither of them said anything as the elevator descended, but the silence wasn’t tense. It was… oddly comfortable.

 

Out of the corner of her eye, Uzi glanced at him again—at the soft expression on his face, his relaxed posture, the faint smile that hadn’t quite left him since she’d spoken.

 

Maybe V was right.

 

Maybe N was kind of sappy.

 

But honestly… that wasn’t a bad thing.

 

Not even a little.

Notes:

Sorry for posting the chapter so late, didn’t have the chance to yesterday 💔

I don’t really have much to say abt this chapter tbh. I don't dislike it or anything, I think I’m js looking forward sm to what’s gonna happen over the next few chapters that this one isn’t exciting as it should be for me, if that makes sense. Still, I really like the way it turned out

One thing though is I think it’s so funny, like I keep mentioning, it’s only been like barely 6 hours into the trip 😭

After the next 2-3 chapters though it should pick up the pace a lot more cuz a pretty important thing is gonna happen the night of the day this chapter is in (if that makes sense. Not gonna say anymore, leaving yall with that-)

That’s abt it for my comments on the chapter ig.

In OTHER news, I’m planning on posting a one-shot soon where it’s N’s POV of when V went through his window the night Uzi found out. I believe he briefly describes the events to Uzi in the chapter called ‘coffee,’ but I might be wrong. It’s js around there, when N tells Uzi abt it in the coffee shop

So yeah expect that within the next 2-2 and a half weeks. I briefly started working on it, but I only really have it planned out. Also, off topic but not, I’m trying to find out how to write from N’s POV to make it actually sound like him. Uzi is easy to write cuz she’s basically js a chronic over thinker and has constant racing thoughts abt everything (there’s still more to it but you get the idea.) and ig I can kinda relate to that to an extent so it’s easy for me to write her inner monologue. But N? I don’t think he’s a chronic over thinker, but he definitely *does* think and stress out abt stuff. But it’s js different than how I would write Uzi, idk how to explain it better than that.

I’m slowly figuring that out, and hopefully I should get better at it 🥲 not gonna post it until I think it’s good enough cuz I don’t want it to seem rushed or half-assed. I don’t even have a reason to rush it

But yeah again I have it all planned out and it seems pretty good so far, I’ll say that. Excited for the finished product.

Idk if I talked abt it in the end notes of the last chapter (cuz I don’t remember if it was even posted then, might as well say it anyways though) BUT I posted another chapter of my other story, Electronic Error: System Failure

GO CHECK IT OUTTTT it’s super good I swear and I love how it turned out. Or like, I’d recommend it to anyone who likes apocalypse/post-apocalypse AU’s. UGH I love it sm and I can’t wait to post more soon

That’s pretty much everything. Next chapter will be posted Friday. See yall then!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 77: Bickering

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The soft chime of the elevator doors broke the momentary silence as they slid open.

 

Uzi and N stepped out into the bustle of the ground floor lobby, just as a small group of drones shuffled in behind them. The doors sealed again, and with a gentle hiss, the elevator continued its ascend toward another stop.

 

Uzi instinctively scanned the space ahead. The warmth in her face—finally—was beginning to cool, though the remnants of that moment with N still lingered somewhere beneath her skin like a phantom warmth.

 

She glanced at him beside her, his gaze focused outward as he scanned the modest crowd.

 

“Do you see anyone we know?” she asked, her tone casual, though her eyes flicked carefully between the clusters of drones beginning to form in the open space.

 

The lobby was already growing crowded. It seemed they weren’t the only ones who’d decided to head out for lunch after settling into their hotel rooms—half the room looked like it had the exact same plan. Drones gathered in groups near the tall windows, their voices overlapping into an indistinct hum of conversation and laughter.

 

N squinted slightly, his posture tipping forward just a bit as he examined the crowd.

 

“I… think that’s Emily?” he murmured, sounding uncertain. His head tilted subtly to the right, eyes narrowed in thought.

 

Uzi didn’t bother trying to look for herself. She just shrugged. “Might as well check,” she said simply.

 

And with that, they moved.

 

The two weaved through the mild traffic of the lobby, slipping past groups mid-conversation, the floor humming gently beneath their steps.

 

As they drew closer to the far corner near a row of tall windows, Uzi recognized the familiar shape of Emily’s pigtails and the unmistakable posture of Rebecca—back straight, arms crossed like she was in charge of something. And Thad, naturally, standing just a little off to the side, like he was part of the group but didn’t want to admit it.

 

This was definitely the spot they’d agreed on. Uzi remembered now.

 

Rebecca turned at their approach, greeting them with a friendly, “Hey!” Her expression was casual but warm, a slight tilt to her brow as if mildly surprised they showed up at all.

 

Emily gave them a quick wave, grinning as her eyes darted between Uzi and N. Thad lifted a hand lazily in greeting, mouth already pulling into a smirk.

 

“Well, look who actually made it on time,” Thad quipped, his tone teasing as he looked directly at Uzi. “Didn’t think you’d show.”

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes at him but let out a short laugh under her breath. “Really?” she replied, dryly amused. “I should be saying that to you. You’re never on time for anything.”

 

Thad scoffed, waving a hand as if brushing away the accusation like an annoying fly. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes but found herself smiling faintly. It was strangely comforting—after the emotionally tangled morning, this normal banter with friends felt like solid ground beneath her feet again.

 

N was the first to break the rhythm of idle conversation. “Hey, have you seen Darren?” he asked, turning his attention to Rebecca with a tilt of his head. His voice wasn’t urgent, just curious, like he had been expecting their friend to already be here.

 

Rebecca nodded without missing a beat. “Yeah, he went to the bathroom. Should be back any minute now,” she replied, brushing a loose strand of hair from her face.

 

“Alright,” N said with a small nod, seemingly reassured.

 

Uzi took that as her cue to speak. She glanced around at the group and asked generally, “So… did you guys figure out where we’re going yet?”

 

Rebecca gave a small shrug, while Thad mirrored her, looking equally unbothered.

 

“Not really,” Rebecca said. “Still deciding.”

 

But Emily perked up like she’d been waiting for the question. “Actually—” she chirped, already pulling out her phone, “I found this really cute café nearby. I was looking at reviews, and they seem pretty solid.”

 

She turned the screen toward the group, and Uzi instinctively stepped closer to get a better look.

 

On the display was a cozy-looking little café with warm-toned lighting and an inviting, minimalist style. A few shots showcased pastries lined neatly in glass cases—flaky croissants, fruit tarts, and little chocolate squares drizzled in something shiny.

 

Uzi didn’t say anything at first, but she tilted her head slightly, inspecting the photo with mild curiosity. It did look kind of cute. And it was a nice change of pace from the sterile, unpacked hotel rooms and crowded lobby.

 

Rebecca peered over as well, and her expression shifted into one of approval. “Okay, that actually looks really good. I’d be down.”

 

The rest of the group offered quiet nods and murmurs of agreement. Even Thad didn’t object—though he didn’t seem particularly moved either.

 

“Alright, it’s settled then,” Emily declared, clearly pleased with herself. “We’ll go there.”

 

Rebecca let out a faint sigh, folding her arms. “Great. Now we just have to wait on Darren…” she muttered, glancing toward the nearby hallway where the bathrooms were located. “He’s taking forever.”

 

Thad made a face, dramatic as always. “You think he got kidnapped or something?” he said, one brow raised in exaggerated concern.

 

Rebecca rolled her eyes hard, then smacked his arm with the back of her hand. “Don’t even joke about that,” she scolded. “Seriously.

 

Thad just laughed, shaking his head as he rubbed the spot she hit. “I’m kidding, relax.”

 

Uzi watched it all with a quiet sense of amusement. It was chaotic, as usual—but familiar. That strange tension in her chest was starting to fade. Being around her friends, hearing their banter, even watching Rebecca and Thad bicker—it helped. She let herself breathe a little easier.

 

She shifted slightly, her arm brushing against N’s, and realized she hadn’t let herself smile like this all morning. Maybe lunch wouldn’t be so bad.

 

After another minute or two of idle chatter, Darren finally appeared—half jogging toward the group with an apologetic expression already on his face. “Sorry, sorry—I took forever, I know,” he said between quick breaths, wiping his hands on the front of his shirt like he’d just left a battlefield instead of a bathroom. “There was this insane line. Seriously, I thought I was gonna be stuck in there forever.”

 

Thad raised a skeptical brow. “In a hotel bathroom?” he asked, crossing his arms. “C’mon, no way.”

 

Darren lifted his hands in exasperation. “I’m not lying! It was packed—some of the guys from our school were in there just… hanging out, talking forever. Took them ten minutes to even move.”

 

Thad narrowed his eyes for a beat, but then gave a noncommittal shrug. “If you say so.”

 

Emily then spoke up, tucking her phone back into her jacket pocket. “Well, now that everyone’s finally here,” she said, grinning slightly, “we should head out.”

 

“Sounds good,” Uzi agreed with a small nod. Her voice came easier now, no longer weighed down with hesitation or nerves.

 

And with that, the group began to move together toward the lobby entrance. Their steps synced with the easy flow of conversation, laughter bubbling from somewhere near the back of the group—probably Thad making another offhand comment.

 

The air outside would probably be hot. There’d probably be too much noise and maybe too much sunlight. But right now, Uzi didn’t mind. The heaviness from earlier had faded enough for her to actually look forward to something as small as lunch.

 

Maybe the rest of today wouldn’t be as exhausting as she thought.

 

-

 

The inside of the café was warm and cozy, with the smell of roasted coffee and freshly baked pastries hanging in the air. Soft instrumental music played from hidden speakers, and the natural light pouring in through the tall front windows gave the space an easy, mellow atmosphere.

 

The group moved quickly, finding an open booth pressed right against the glass—one long table with two bench seats that could comfortably fit three drones on each side.

 

“This is perfect,” Emily noted cheerfully as she motioned to the space. “We can do three to a side, easy.”

 

On the left side of the table, Darren slid down first, then Rebecca, and the. Emily sat on the end of the seat.

 

Uzi stood behind the remaining two drones for a moment, her eyes already drifting toward N. Without hesitation, he stepped into the booth on the far side and slid over to the window, giving her an unspoken cue. She smiled to herself, already moving to follow—

 

—but Thad suddenly appeared at her side and plopped himself right in the middle seat next to N, completely unaware of the silent calculation she’d just made. Uzi blinked in surprise, her steps faltering.


Seriously?

 

She stood there for half a second, internally debating whether or not she should say something. He wasn’t doing it on purpose… right? He probably just really wanted food and claimed the spot without thinking.

 

Still, it irritated her. She reluctantly moved into the open spot next to him, now stuck at the end of the bench seat, one drone away from where she actually wanted to be.

 

Uzi’s annoyance simmered. She narrowed her eyes at Thad, reached under the table, and gave the soft part of his arm a sharp pinch and twist. He jerked away instantly with a yelp, flinching and rubbing his arm.

 

“Ow—what was that for?!”

 

Uzi didn’t even try to look innocent. She scoffed and leaned back, arms crossed. “You’re fat,” she muttered with mock disdain, flicking her gaze toward the wall like that explained everything.

 

Thad stared at her, visibly offended and deeply confused. “ What?! ” he half-laughed, like he wasn’t sure if she was joking or trying to pick a fight.

 

Uzi shrugged dismissively, not giving him any more of a reaction. She wasn’t really mad, just a little bitter.

 

It wasn’t his fault—technically—but it still sucked. All she’d wanted was to sit next to N. Her eyes flicked in his direction. He was sitting relaxed, looking at her with the ghost of a smile like he’d seen everything but was pretending not to.

 

She quickly looked away. This was going to be a long lunch.

 

Before either of them could continue their petty bickering, Emily’s voice rose over the chatter, taking charge with her usual sense of efficiency. “Okay, everyone just text me what you want,” she said, pulling out her phone. “I’ll go up and order for us—it’s faster that way, and we won’t lose the booth.”

 

Rebecca, already scrolling through her own screen, nodded approvingly. “That’s actually really smart.”

 

Emily smirked at the compliment, brushing her hair behind her ear. “I know.”

 

Uzi leaned forward slightly, glancing down the table. There weren’t any menus in sight—not on the table, not stuck in any display holder. She furrowed her brow. Okay, then where are we supposed to see what they have?

 

She turned to Thad, still rubbing his arm like he expected another sneak attack, and gave him a quick poke in the ribs. “Hey. Where’s the menu?”

 

He immediately shot her a glare, jaw tightening. “Why do you need my help all of a sudden?” he muttered. “Didn’t you just assault me?”

 

Uzi gave him the flattest stare she could manage. “I will pinch you again, ” she warned.

 

Thad lifted his hands in surrender. “Alright, alright—jeez.” He let out an exaggerated sigh, rolling his eyes so hard it was practically audible. “Since you’re being so polite about it—there’s no menu.”

 

Uzi blinked, unimpressed. “What?”

 

He jabbed a finger toward the end of the table nearest to Uzi. “It’s all online. You scan that little QR thingy with your phone, and boom—instant menu.”

 

Following his gesture, Uzi noticed the small laminated square literally right next to her with a faint, slightly smudged QR code printed on it. She leaned forward to get a better look. How could she have missed that?

 

“That’s dumb,” she said flatly, pulling her phone out anyway. “Why not just have real ones on the table? What if someone doesn’t have a phone?”

 

Thad shrugged without much care. “I dunno. Probably too expensive. Or maybe they’re trying to save trees.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes, muttering something under her breath as she opened her camera app. The QR code focused into view, and she tapped the link that popped up.

 

Her irritation was still simmering just a bit—not enough to be real anger, but enough that she was mentally blaming Thad for everything annoying about the café's setup.

 

Still, at least now she could finally pick something to eat. And maybe, if she was lucky, Thad would get distracted or leave for whatever reason, and she could switch spots with him. A girl could dream.

 

N leaned forward a bit, shifting in his seat to peek past Thad. “Hey, Uzi?”

 

Uzi blinked and leaned in too, craning her neck slightly so she could actually see him.

 

Thad, wedged between them, didn’t seem to notice—or if he did, he pretended not to.

 

“What’s up?” she asked.

 

N held out his phone toward her, a hopeful look on his face. “Can you scan the menu for me? I can’t see it from over here.”

 

Uzi nodded. “Yeah, I got it.”

 

As he handed her the phone, their fingers brushed—just lightly. But it was enough to send a sudden flutter straight through her core, and she cursed herself for how noticeable it felt.

 

Seriously? That tiny bit of touch made me feel some type of way?

 

But… it was N. And he had been acting especially sweet today. That had to count for something, right? It wasn’t like she got this kind of attention from anyone else.

 

She barely had time to collect herself before she heard Thad mutter under his breath to himself, “He could’ve asked me, y’know…”

 

Uzi didn’t even look at him. She didn’t need to. She was far too focused on ignoring the little smile tugging at her lips.

 

She quickly scanned the code on N’s phone, tapping the link as the menu popped up. But just as she was about to hand it back to him, something impulsive sparked in her—a small, mischievous instinct.

 

This time, when she gave the phone back, she made sure her fingers brushed against his again. Not clumsy or accidental. Intentional. She felt it when his touch paused for just a second too long. And when she looked up?

 

Yep. He’d noticed.

 

N’s eyes flicked to hers briefly, and then darted away—his face softening with that sheepish, bashful smile that always managed to make her stomach twist in a way she didn’t entirely hate anymore.

 

Uzi smirked, victorious. Got him.

 

She turned her attention back to her own phone, scanning the menu now for herself. Pastries, sandwiches, a few weird-sounding specialty drinks. Nothing groundbreaking—but she wasn’t paying much attention to it anyway.

 

All she could think about was how badly she wanted to be sitting next to N. Not across. Next. Close enough that she didn’t have to lean, didn’t have to reach—close enough that brushing hands wouldn’t have to be a game.

 

She sighed quietly to herself and scrolled down the menu, lips twitching in thought.

 

Thad better move after this.

 

Deep down, though she hated to admit it, she knew he wouldn’t.

 

-

 

Emily placed the last dish on the table, sliding into her seat with a satisfied sigh as the scent of fresh pastries and warm batter filled the air.

 

Uzi leaned forward slightly, her eyes lighting up at the sight of her plate. The chocolate-filled crepe looked exactly how she hoped—thin, golden layers folded neatly and dusted with powdered sugar, generously topped with glistening strawberries and a glossy drizzle of syrup. It looked like something straight out of a café window display.

 

She picked up her fork, ready to dive in—but something made her glance sideways.

 

Her gaze landed on Thad’s plate, and she smirked, arching a brow. “Hey,” she said, cutting in with a dry, teasing tone. “Remember when I called you fat?”

 

Thad, already halfway through pouring a small mountain of chocolate sauce on top of his pastry, paused. He gave her a look, unimpressed. “You’re just jealous,” he fired back with mock confidence, gesturing to his mountain of a croissant. “You can’t handle a double chocolate, chocolate-filled croissant with chocolate drizzle and chocolate shavings.”

 

Uzi gave a half-laugh through her nose, resting her elbow on the table and raising her fork slightly. “I’m good, thanks,” she shot back, eyeing his pastry like it might explode from a sugar overload. “That sounds like a mouthful… literally.

 

Thad laughed, unable to argue. He nudged her arm with his elbow in response—just hard enough to jostle her, but still playful. “Whatever. Stay mad.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes but smirked faintly, shaking her head as she turned back to her own plate.

 

Despite the sarcasm, the back-and-forth felt easy—casual, light. The kind of banter that reminded her of normalcy.

 

She slid her fork into the crepe, carefully cutting a bite that caught both the melted chocolate inside and a bit of the strawberries on top. As she brought it to her mouth and tasted it, her expression softened slightly. It was warm, rich, just sweet enough without being too much. A comfort food kind of sweetness.

 

Her shoulders relaxed just a bit as she chewed. The conversation and laughter around the table carried on, and for the first time in what felt like hours, her thoughts weren’t racing or tangled.

 

Just good food, good noise, and N—still seated just across from her to her right—sneaking glances every now and then when he thought she wasn’t looking.

 

She pretended not to notice. But she did. And the small smile tugging at the edge of her lips said as much.

Notes:

Aww what a cute chapter

Let’s just hope that this last and nothing absolutely terrible happens next chapter 🥰

LMAO ANYWAYS

Not even gonna lie, I wrote this whole thing in like an hour and edited it in half an hour 💔

I really couldn’t figure out what more to do, so that’s why there’s like, 2 small time skips between when they leave the hotel and while they’re waiting for their food. I love the way it turned out though, I think it’s so cute!!!

I didn’t wanna not post today even though I almost didn’t, cuz like I promised one today and I didn’t want to procrastinate.

Usually a chapter takes me abt an hour to an hour and a half to fully write out a draft (not including the like 15 minutes I use to make bullet points for a rough outline-) then, I go back through and edit anything that doesn’t make sense, and then I re-read it one more time and make sure all the italics have the little * things. And *then* I paste it into ao3 and I italicize anything that needs to be italicized, and then write the ends notes and BOOM done

That’s my whole chapter-writing process, even though no one asked 😫

Not going into any more detail abt the next chapter - just know that *something* is gonna happen. But who knows what it could be 🤷

Next chapter will be posted Monday or Tuesday idk. It should also be a *lot* longer than this one too, jsyk

See yall then! Or the few people still here, at least- ANYWAYS LMAO BYE 😭🤚

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 78: Complete and Utter Shit.

Notes:

Just to let yall know, this chapter has a LOT of dialogue, so bear with me please 😭🙏

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The soft hum of the hotel’s air conditioning filled the quiet, broken only by the occasional creak of the walls or the faint buzz of traffic outside.

 

Uzi lay flat on her back, eyes fixed on the pale ceiling above her, yet she wasn’t really seeing it. Her thoughts drifted like static—calm, but persistent.

 

She turned her head to the side with a faint sigh, cheek pressing into the cool pillow.

 

Why was she still awake?

 

It wasn’t stress, not this time. There was no mental spiral over her day for once, no doom-fueled anxiety clamping down on her chest. For once, everything had gone… right. Mostly.

 

Her mind circled back to lunch. That one annoying moment—when Thad had unknowingly stolen the seat beside N. She’d gotten over it, sure, but still, it lingered in the background like an itch. He didn’t mean anything by it, she knew that. But still.

 

The rest of the day, though, had gone relatively well. After the group finished eating at the café, they had stopped by a souvenir shop close to the hotel.

 

She couldn’t help but smile as she remembered Rebecca’s grin as she handed Thad yet another pair of hideous, oversized souvenir sunglasses. The way he’d tried to act cool in them while the group stifled laughter and showered him with fake compliments, convincing him that they looked good while Emily secretly took photos. Thad, oblivious at first, was hamming it up. And then—realization.  Rebecca was shrieking with laughter as he lunged after her, and the whole group scattered like children at recess.

 

Uzi hadn’t bought anything, hadn’t needed to. Just being there had been enough.

 

She let out another sigh, softer this time, almost a breath of laughter as her memory replayed the ridiculous scene from earlier.

 

And yet, here she was. Lying in bed, hours later, too full of something  to fall asleep. Not anxiety. Not dread. Something… softer. Lighter.

 

It was annoying, in a way—how a good end to a mediocre day could leave her mind just as loud as a bad one. The kind of buzz that came not from fear, but from memory. From warmth.

 

She turned again in the sheets, flipping to her other side. Okay, seriously. Brain: off. Sleep: now.

 

But her lips twitched faintly. And her fingers curled loosely around the edge of the blanket, like she was holding onto a moment she didn’t want to lose.

 

For about five seconds, Uzi’s mind finally felt quiet.

 

Then—bam.

 

Like a mental flashbang, her brain ambushed her with a full technicolor image of N . Just… all of him.

 

She recalled the way he looked at her when they parted ways outside the elevators.

 

That soft, sincere smile. The way he’d said “Goodnight, Uzi.”  like it actually meant something. And the moment he turned to walk off—he nearly tripped over his own feet because he’d been too busy looking back at her.

 

She buried her face in her pillow, a smile creeping across her face despite her best efforts. It wasn’t even a conscious reaction—it just happened.

 

And then, panic.

 

Uzi sat up slightly, eyes wide, and slapped her hands over her mouth like she’d just confessed a state secret.

 

No. Nope. Unacceptable.

 

Her smile vanished into a groan as she dragged both hands down her face in shame.

 

She was getting corny.

 

Disgusting. This was how it started—first a little smile, then suddenly she’s doodling hearts around his name in a notebook or something equally revolting. Absolutely not.  She had a reputation. A persona. She was supposed to be the one immune to that kind of sappy nonsense. She was not a cornball.

 

But as she dropped back into the mattress, limbs heavy, her mind spun back into the quiet fog that always seemed to form around him. N.

 

Now, still on that topic, her thoughts were falling back onto what she had been thinking about a few hours ago in the hotel room before she went out to lunch. She still didn’t even know what this  was—whatever was happening between them.

 

They weren’t dating. At least… she wasn’t calling it that. And she was definitely not about to ask him to. That would require saying it out loud, and just thinking about it made her shrivel like an overheating motherboard.

 

But even more than the label—it was the reality.

 

He was a disassembly drone. A disassembly drone. And she—just a normal drone, like literally everyone else—wasn’t built for that kind of disaster. Was she? How could they possibly work? Was it stupid of her to even hope they could? She had no idea what she was doing. No idea what he wanted out of this.

 

And deep down, no matter how sweet he was, no matter how many times he looked at her like she mattered—there was still that quiet fear.

 

That maybe it would all end badly. That one of them would get hurt, emotionally and/or physically. That she’d let him get too close, and then ruin it…

 

She flipped on her side and arms wrapped around her legs, curling inward as her knees tucked to her chest.

 

The hotel room suddenly felt a little too big.


She really disliked this. Not the feelings—but the spiraling. The second-guessing. She didn’t want to think anymore, not tonight. Not when things had been so good.

 

She could deal with the reality check later. After the trip. When she was back in her room, back in the chaos of normal life, far away from everything good and confusing about this moment.

 

For now… she just wanted quiet.

 

Uzi squeezed her eyes shut, trying to will her brain into silence—but it was no use. Her thoughts kept ricocheting inside her skull like trapped code, never lingering long enough to sort through, but never quieting either.

 

Each one led into the next: N, the trip, the way she smiled too much today, how warm it felt when their fingers touched, how stupid she felt about thinking about that warmth now, how she wasn’t sure where they stood, how she might have to ruin it later

 

After what felt like an eternity of mental static, something inside her snapped.

 

She sat up with a sudden huff, sheets falling away from her. The frustration had reached a boiling point. Her fingers curled into the fabric of her blanket before she forced herself to release it.

 

This was ridiculous. Why couldn’t she just shut down like a normal drone? At this point she wasn’t even sad or anxious—just angry that her brain wouldn’t stop buzzing.

 

She glanced to her left.

 

Lizzy lay on her side, mouth hanging open slightly, snoring without a care in the world. It echoed softly through the room, and under any other circumstance Uzi might have thrown a pillow at her. Instead, a quiet smirk pulled at her mouth. Lizzy would be mortified if she knew she sounded like that. The drama, the denial, the absolute refusal to believe it—it almost made Uzi laugh. Almost.

 

Her eyes shifted beyond Lizzy to the furthest bed. J was just a silhouette in the dim room, unmoving. That was fine. Good, actually. J always had that twitchy energy about her—if she was out cold, it meant there was no risk of Uzi accidentally waking her up… hopefully.

 

Turning her head the other way, she checked on V.

 

V was bundled tight, practically mummified in blankets, only the top of her head barely visible. It looked… peaceful, even. Like the kind of sleep Uzi wished she could be having right now.

 

She sighed softly through her nose and sat still for a moment longer before stretching her arms overhead with a low groan. Alright. Fine. Clearly, sleep wasn’t happening on its own.

 

She eased out of bed, careful not to make too much noise as her feet hit the floor. The room was cool against her plating as she padded quietly past V’s cocooned form.

 

Her mind still spun in the background, but now it was fainter—replaced by the simple intention of doing something, anything  to break the loop. A sip of water. A splash of cold across her face. Just enough to reset. Maybe then she’d stand a chance at powering down.

 

With that, she moved toward the bathroom at the front of the hotel room, her quiet footsteps muffled against the carpeted floor.

 

When she made it to the bathroom door, she opened it gently, making sure it didn’t creek. With that, she walked into the room.

 

But, Uzi had barely stepped into the bathroom before the door clicked shut behind her—without her touching it. The second she turned around, her mind went blank with pure alarm.

 

Another figure was inside. They’d followed her in.

 

She didn’t even have time to scream—she meant  to—but the instant her mouth opened, a hand clamped tightly over it.

 

Her eyes widened. Her legs locked. Her core spun with dread.

 

Was it J?! Did she know?!  Was this it?! Was she about to be dragged out and silenced for good—?

 

Shut up, doofus, a familiar voice hissed low in her ear, thick with sleep and annoyance.

 

Uzi froze, recognition hitting instantly.

 

It was V.

 

She slapped V’s hand away from her mouth in a snap, her tone spiking into a whisper-shout as she took a shaky breath.

 

What the hell is wrong with you?!  she hissed. “You better have a damn great  reason for jump-scaring me like that!”

 

V reached past her and flicked the bathroom light on, squinting against the brightness as she pulled back. Any attempt at menace she might’ve had was immediately ruined by the fact that her hair was a disaster. Tufts of it stuck out in random directions like she’d been electrocuted mid-dream, and her pajamas—polka dot, pastel, definitely not intimidating—made her look more like a disgruntled child than a would-be assassin.

 

Uzi blinked at her, momentarily thrown. V caught her stare and, with a huff, ran both hands through her messy hair in a feeble attempt to flatten it.

 

I have a reason, V muttered, her voice low and irritable. “But you need to shut up and listen. And keep your volume down before someone hears you.”

 

Uzi folded her arms, unimpressed, eyebrows knitting into a scowl. “You literally tackled me into a bathroom like we’re in some dumb spy movie. What could possibly be that important that you couldn’t just wait till morning?

 

V rolled her eyes and leaned back against the counter, exhaling like she didn’t want to be here either. Strangely, though, her expression was more serious now—less irritated and more… grim.

 

Uzi could feel her pulse ticking a little faster, unsure where this was going.

 

Her initial panic had faded, but confusion and the smallest hint of leftover adrenaline was still pulsing in her chest.

 

What the hell could V have to say that required sneaking around like this?

 

V didn’t waste time dancing around it. Her tone dropped, stripped of sarcasm or sass, as she cut straight to the heart of it.

 

J knows.

 

The words hit like a slap.

 

Uzi’s whole body tensed. Her eyes widened in disbelief, her voice hitching in her throat as she fought the overwhelming urge to blurt out what?!

 

Instead, she managed a strained, whisper-shouted,What?! How?! She stared at V, her head already shaking. “She can’t know. We didn’t say anything. We haven’t done anything! I’ve been careful—

 

V raised a hand, cutting her off. “Uzi. I told you to shut up and listen.

 

Her voice was firm, her brows furrowed as she gestured sharply to make her point stick. She then sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, exasperated—at Uzi, at the situation, maybe at herself.

 

“Okay,” V muttered, more collected now. “Remember the library?”

 

At first, Uzi’s mind went blank—until it didn’t. That memory clicked into place like a sudden, snapping puzzle piece.

 

Right before the trip.

 

V had cornered her by her locker, clearly irritated but also weirdly  serious. She’d told Uzi that N had been talking about her way too much—and specifically around J. It was getting obvious, V said. Suspicion was brewing.

 

At first, Uzi hadn’t understood why V couldn’t just talk to N herself. But V had said that when it came to Uzi, N didn’t listen. He’d just get all starry-eyed and distracted, brushing off every warning like she was overreacting.

 

And since V was always around J, everything N kept saying about Uzi kept getting repeated right in front of her. Constantly.

 

So, Uzi had taken her advice and asked N to meet her at the library after school. She hadn’t planned anything dramatic—just wanted to talk, to make sure he’d stop being so obvious.

 

But that’s when they saw her.

 

J. She’d been there. Coincidentally. She was probably checking out books or something mundane like that.

 

Uzi’s heart thudded in her chest even now, just remembering it.

 

She and N had hidden, slipping into the maze of tall bookshelves as quickly and quietly as they could. They hadn’t heard footsteps follow them. They hadn’t seen her peek around the corner. Uzi had assumed —hoped—that J hadn’t noticed.

 

But now…

 

Now she wasn’t so sure.

 

Uzi’s thoughts twisted tighter as the memory rushed back—her and N slipping between the shelves, low whispers echoing through dust-laced air, the soft golden light from the high windows barely reaching the narrow aisle they sat on the floor of.

 

She remembered how uncertain N had looked when she brought up what V told her. His eyes had fallen, and his posture slouched in guilt. It was like it hadn’t even occurred to him how obvious he’d been.

 

And then they talked a little more, changing the topic after that was settled. Uzi had… questioned why he made so much of an effort to protect her. She didn’t understand. (And honestly, even now she didn’t fully understand.)

 

And then she had cried because of what he said—how he seemed to truly care about her.

 

And then—ugh.

 

They had kissed.

 

Just once. But still. It had happened.

 

Uzi smacked that thought aside like a bug.

 

That’s not the point right now. Why does my brain always remind me of this stuff?!

 

She narrowed her eyes at V, her suspicion growing like static under her skin. “…Yeah, I remember,” she muttered slowly, hesitant. “Why?”

 

But before V could answer, Uzi’s eyes flicked up in realization.

 

“Wait—how do you know we met in the library? I never told you that.”

 

V groaned and gave her a dramatic look, her head tilting with exasperation. “I was getting to that, genius.”

 

She crossed her arms now, shifting her weight to one side as her tone turned serious again. “J saw you two leave together.”

 

Uzi blinked. “Okay? So what?” She shrugged, confusion written all over her face. “That doesn’t mean anything. She could’ve thought we were just studying or—”

 

“No,” V cut in, deadpan. “It didn’t look  like you were just studying.” Her eyes locked on Uzi with dry amusement. “You both came out from between the shelves, and N looked like his processor was about to overheat. His face was redder than a tomato.”

 

Uzi went stiff.

 

Her arms hung limply by her sides for a moment as her gaze dropped to the floor, horrified realization dawning. She looked like she’d been hit with a memory she was trying very hard to forget.

 

V raised a brow and tilted her head. “What were you two even doing back there?”

 

Uzi opened her mouth—froze—then tried to speak again. “I… we were just…”

 

The stuttering excuse never even formed before V waved a hand like she was swatting a fly. “Forget it. I don’t want to know. For the sake of my sanity, don’t say another word.”

 

Uzi’s mouth shut with a click. Her face was burning. She even felt a sense of déjà vu—hadn’t she had this exact conversation with V at her locker?

 

No, this time it was different. Because it wasn’t just that J was suspicious—it was that J knew.

 

She crossed her arms again, this time tighter, trying to shrink into herself.

 

Embarrassment, worry, and a faint ghost of regret all churned in her chest. That had been such a private moment—quiet, vulnerable, and unexpected—and now it might’ve ruined everything.

 

Again, J knew.

 

And that meant they were in real trouble.

 

V leaned back against the bathroom sink, arms crossed tightly, her expression more serious now than it had been the entire night. The sharp edges of her usual sarcasm were dulled, replaced by a quiet tension in her posture, the way her brows furrowed ever so slightly.

 

She kept her voice low, but steady. “Even if J didn’t know what you two were doing in the library right away,” she said, “she still saw you leave together. That was all she needed to start piecing things together.”

 

Uzi frowned, arms crossed now too, the corners of her mouth twitching with frustration.

 

“She already saw you two walk out of the party together, like, a few days prior. Then she saw you again at the library.” V raised her hand and motioned vaguely in the air as if arranging puzzle pieces. “And after that? N stopped talking about you.”

 

She let that sit for a beat, then exhaled a long, tired sigh. “Put all of that together, and J figured out there was something going on between you and him. So she came to me.

 

That stopped Uzi cold. Her eyes narrowed slightly, brows furrowing. Her voice came out sharper than she intended. “Okay, but that still doesn’t explain how she knows. That doesn’t mean she figured out everything.

 

V shot her a glare and made a sharp “shh!” sound. “Would you let me finish?

 

Uzi shut her mouth reluctantly, jaw tense.

 

V looked away, staring at a cracked tile near the floor as if it were suddenly the most interesting thing in the room. Her voice quieted. “J told me everything I just told you.”

 

Uzi tilted her head slightly, eyes narrowing. “And?”

 

V didn’t respond immediately. She hesitated. Her body stilled in a way that felt unnatural for her—no fidgeting, just silence as she looked away.

 

“And from that…” she started, but the words hung there unfinished.

 

Uzi’s lips had just parted, about to demand what V meant by ‘from that,’ but V turned back toward her, her voice cutting through the bathroom's dim tension.

 

“She asked me what I thought,” V said bluntly, her tone returning to that dry, unflinching frankness Uzi was used to. “About you and N. About what she’d seen.”

 

Uzi blinked, her breath catching slightly. “And?” she asked warily.

 

V rolled her eyes, though it seemed more tired than exasperated. “Obviously, I told her they were probably just coincidences. That she was reading too much into it.”

 

Uzi felt a brief flash of relief—only for it to vanish when V kept speaking. “But J wasn’t convinced. She said we couldn’t take any chances.”

 

V's expression darkened. Her tone dipped with weight, like the words themselves tasted bitter in her mouth.

 

“And then she laid out a plan.”

 

Uzi’s frustration melted into unease, her brows pulling together. Her voice was quieter now, more cautious. “What kind of plan?

 

V shifted her weight slightly, her arms still crossed, her fingers digging a little into her own sleeves. “She said the city trip was the perfect cover. If one drone went missing, it’d look like the school just lost track of someone. Maybe a kidnapping. Maybe they ran off. Either way… no one would suspect another student was responsible for their disappearance.”

 

That finally sent Uzi over the edge. Her concern was swallowed by outrage. She stepped forward, her arms falling to her sides as her voice rose again—too loud for a room full of sleeping drones.

 

“That still doesn’t make sense!” she snapped, eyes wide. “You just said J doesn’t even know for sure! So why the hell is she acting like I’m some confirmed threat?!

 

V’s eyes narrowed, her mouth tightening in annoyance. “Will you shut up?!” she hissed. “Do you want her to hear you?!”

 

Uzi froze in place, her whole body tense. Her heart hammered like it might punch through her ribs. She glanced back toward the door instinctively, as if J might burst through the it at any second.

 

V exhaled sharply through her nose, then continued more evenly. “Yeah. You’re right. J doesn’t know. Not for sure.”

 

She paused, looking Uzi dead in the eye now.

 

“But like I said… she doesn’t want to take any chances.”

 

That struck Uzi harder than she expected. Her throat tightened. Her mind raced with the implications. So it didn’t matter whether J had solid proof or not. If J even suspected she’d act.

 

And with a plan already in motion, Uzi was starting to feel like the trap had already been set.

 

Her stomach twisted into a knot.

 

V hesitated, and for a split second, Uzi saw a flicker of discomfort behind her eyes—an emotion V didn’t wear often. She shifted her weight again, arms still crossed, one hand reaching up to rub at the corner of her brow in something close to frustration. Her voice, when she finally spoke, was quieter. Not softer—just heavier.

 

“J said this was a win-win for her,” V admitted, eyes narrowed slightly, like she was repeating something she hadn’t wanted to hear in the first place. “If she’s right, and you already know—problem solved. And if she’s wrong? She’s making sure you never  find out.”

 

Uzi felt the air pull from her lungs. Her thoughts began to spiral—faster, sharper, more urgent.

 

So either way, she was a target. Whether she was already in on the secret or not didn’t even matter.

 

V leaned back against the wall, posture casual in appearance but tense around the edges. She crossed one ankle over the other, then dropped her arms just to fold them again. The way she shifted almost felt defensive now, like even she hated what she was saying.

 

“And before you even ask,” V cut in preemptively, not even glancing at her, “yeah. J thinks N would tell you. That it’s only a matter of time.”

 

Uzi’s mouth parted, but no sound came. She looked down, stunned. Her thoughts were cloudy, unsure which thread to follow. Why would J assume N would tell me if he had no reason to…?

 

As if she just read Uzi’s mind, V continued, tilting her head slightly. “You know how he is. He gets weird about lying. Guilty. And when he actually likes someone? He’s worse.”

 

Uzi didn’t answer. She just stood there, the weight of it all pressing down on her. It wasn’t just about being close to N anymore.

 

Now, it felt like every second she spent with him was a countdown. Every laugh, every look, every moment where things felt… right—it was just more ammo for J. Something that could be used to justify whatever plan she was already putting into motion.

 

She finally spoke, her voice low and unsure. V hadn’t fully answered her internal question, so she decided to ask her out loud, directly. “Okay… okay. I get that. But what would make J assume that he’d randomly tell me about that. He never even had a reason to bring it up, until I… found out. But that wasn’t necessarily his fault, y’know.” She wasn’t trying to be accusatory when she spoke by indirectly bringing up the fact that V was technically the reason she found out—it was just a fact.

 

V seemingly ignored the comment, or didn’t take offense to it. Instead, her expression shifted. Her lips pressed into a tight, unreadable line, and her gaze drifted to the floor as if considering how much to say. For once, she looked almost… conflicted. That alone made Uzi’s pulse quicken.

 

“I don’t know…” V muttered under her breath, rubbing at her cheek with her palm. “I don’t know if I should tell you this…”

 

Uzi stared blankly at her. Then she blinked and deadpanned. “Okay, yeah. You definitely have to tell me now. You can’t say that and not tell me.”

 

V let out an aggravated sigh and dragged her hand down her face, clearly regretting opening her mouth. But Uzi was locked in now—on edge, anxious, and fully unwilling to let V dance around it. Whatever it was… she had to know.

 

V finally exhaled and ran a hand through her tangled hair, looking more worn out than Uzi had ever seen her. There was still no sarcasm now, no sharp edge in her voice—just fatigue, laced with the weight of something she hadn’t planned on saying tonight.

 

“…Might as well tell you,” she muttered, her voice quiet but steady. She paused, then finally met Uzi’s eyes. “There was someone else. Another drone N got close to before you.”

 

That made Uzi blink—more from surprise than jealousy. V’s tone wasn’t gossipy, or even dramatic. It was serious. Heavy.

 

That only made it worse.

 

“One day, something happened,” V continued, her shoulders tensing as she spoke. “I don’t know the details—neither does J, really. N never gave us the full story. He just… said that drone found out what he was. And she didn’t take it well.”

 

Uzi’s heart sank. Her stomach twisted, the pieces already starting to form a grim picture before V even finished.

 

“She freaked out,” V added, giving a vague gesture with one hand, then letting it fall back to her side. “Or something like that. N told us she panicked. Next thing I knew, J was saying she was going to get rid of her. Said she was a risk.

 

There was something hard in V’s voice now. Cold. Like she hadn’t agreed with that decision—but hadn’t been able to stop it, either.

 

“N pushed back,” she went on, glancing to the side like she was pulling the memory from somewhere she didn’t want to go. “Got into it with J. They fought over it. It got ugly.”


Uzi’s eyes were wide now, locked on V’s face, her mind racing. She could barely picture N fighting with anyone, let alone J—especially over something like this.

 

V turned back to her, arms crossed tightly again, like she was holding herself together. “Lucky for him, the drone moved away before anything happened. J never got the chance to follow through.”

 

Uzi stayed silent, absorbing that. She didn’t know what to say. There was a strange ache settling in her chest, not just fear, but something heavier—pity, guilt, even a hint of dread. All this time, she’d known N carried things with him. But now it felt so much more real.

 

V hesitated, clearly debating whether to go on. Then she sighed again.

 

“After that… N changed,” she said, her voice lower now. “He still acted the same, but he wasn’t. I’ve known him since we were kids, and I could tell. He became more reserved—just a little. But enough. Whenever he would laugh or smile, it just didn’t feel real anymore.”

 

Uzi felt like her breath caught in her throat. She wanted to say something—ask more—but it was like her thoughts were stuck in tar.

 

It wasn’t just about the past anymore. This… this was why J was paranoid. This was what she thought might happen again. And more than that, this was another thing N had been through. Another thing he might still be afraid of happening again.

 

“And with his home life being what it is…” V added quietly, almost to herself. She trailed off and looked away, jaw tight. “Honestly, I don’t know how he got through all of it…”

 

After V finished talking, the weight of everything she’d said seemed to settle in Uzi’s chest like a lead weight. She stared at the floor, thoughts spinning and refusing to land. There was too much to feel. Sadness. Anger. Guilt. And worst of all—fear. Because she wasn’t just afraid of J anymore. She was afraid of what this might do to N. Again, apparently.

 

She didn’t say anything at first. She couldn’t. Her eyes just continued to stare down at nothing, unfocused—trying to make sense of a thousand thoughts at once. Dread pressed down on her, thick and cold and suffocating.

 

So… J really was planning to kill her.


N and her probably weren’t going to work out.

 

And worst of all, she wasn’t even the first.

 

That last one sat the heaviest.

 

She felt her jaw tighten. That thought stung more than she wanted to admit. The things N had told her—the quiet moments, the way he’d looked at her, the way his voice had trembled when he told her she mattered—was that just… recycled sentiment? Had he said all that before to someone else? Another drone who had been in the same place she was now?

 

Uzi’s frown deepened. What if it hadn’t meant as much as she thought it had? What if she didn’t mean as much as she thought she did?

 

Oh, Robo-god, she thought they were something real.

 

She bit down hard on the inside of her cheek, trying to keep her expression neutral, but she could already feel the sting at the corners of her eyes.

 

No. She wouldn’t cry over this. Not in front of V. Not right now.

 

She needed answers.

 

Her voice came out quieter than she expected, taut with barely concealed emotion. “How was he with that other drone?”

 

V blinked. “Seriously? That’s what you’re asking right now?”

 

The disbelief in her tone made Uzi’s temper snap back into place.

 

“Just answer the question,” she hissed, sharper now, crossing her arms tightly over her chest as if to keep herself together. Her expression was guarded, but her eyes burned.

 

V scoffed and leaned back a bit against the wall, arms folded. “Fine,” she muttered, clearly not expecting this turn of conversation. “You want the truth?”

 

Uzi said nothing, just nodded stiffly. Her gaze stayed locked on V.

 

V sighed, the irritation slipping slightly from her face as she glanced down, thinking. “…It was different.”

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes. “What the hell does that  mean?” Her voice cracked slightly at the end, and she hated that.

 

But V didn’t rise to the tone. She didn’t look smug, or sarcastic. In fact, she looked—surprisingly gentle.

 

“It means even if N was close to her,” V said, more quietly now, “it wasn’t like how he is with you.

 

Uzi froze at that, her arms loosening slightly. She stared at V, searching her expression for a lie, or a half-truth—anything.

 

But V just met her gaze steadily, without her usual smirk. “I’m not gonna pretend I understand everything about N’s feelings,” she said, her voice softer than Uzi was used to hearing from her. “But I do know him. And with her… he liked her, sure. But he didn’t light up when she walked in the room. He didn’t get so flustered he had to force himself to finish a sentence when she talked to him. He didn’t bring her up constantly the way he does with you.”

 

Uzi felt her breath hitch slightly. Her heart was still a mess—but the dread had loosened its grip just a little. Not entirely, but enough to breathe. Enough to hope.

 

“…Really?” she said under her breath, not meaning to say it out loud.

 

V nodded once. “Really.”

 

Wait… that didn’t entirely make sense to Uzi. She got the general idea, but still she was somewhat confused. Uzi didn’t hesitate to speak up this time. Her voice was flat and direct—almost tired. “Explain.”

 

V looked at her like she’d been expecting that. “I mean it,” she said, arms still crossed but her voice more patient than usual. “He didn’t talk about that other drone the way he talks about you .”

 

Uzi blinked. “Okay, but still, what do you mean?

 

“He wasn’t around her all the time,” V clarified, shrugging one shoulder. “Didn’t seek her out the way he’s always near you. Didn’t look at her like she was the last drone left in the room.”

 

Uzi’s brows pulled together, her confusion tightening into a frown. She didn’t interrupt, but she watched V closely, uncertain whether to believe her or brace herself.

 

V went on, a little more thoughtfully now. “When N cares about someone, he gets… protective. That’s just who he is. Like I said—he fought J over that other girl because J threatened her. It wasn’t just some argument either, it was bad. Like he was willing to put himself in danger just to keep her safe.”

 

Uzi nodded slowly, trying to follow. But V wasn’t done.

 

“But with you,” she said, looking Uzi dead in the eye, “it’s different. I see it. You stayed with him—even after you found out. You knew , and you didn’t leave. You didn’t freak out. You didn’t treat him like a monster… And that probably scared him more than anything else.”

 

Uzi’s eyes widened slightly. She opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out.

 

V kept going. “That’s why I think this is different. Because you know what he is, and you’re still here. And now?” V scoffed softly, shaking her head. “Now he’s probably terrified of losing you, more than anything.”

 

There was a long silence between them. Uzi didn’t even realize she’d gone still until her arms slowly lowered to her sides. She just stood there, blinking, heart stuttering in a rhythm she couldn’t quite name.

 

That was… a lot.

 

Her head felt foggy from everything being dumped on her all at once. She couldn’t even begin to process half of what V just said—not right now, anyway. The fear about J, the past with that other drone, and now… this.

 

She was overwhelmed. She needed something else  to focus on.

 

So she latched onto the one thing that still felt urgent.

 

“So,” she said, clearing her throat and forcing her voice to sound steadier than she felt, “about J—what do you think I should do?”

 

V’s expression shifted slightly at the change in topic, but she didn’t push it. Instead, she let out a quiet breath and leaned back against the wall, eyes narrowing in thought.

 

Then, V went quiet for a moment—really quiet. With her arms still folded, she tilted her head and narrowed her eyes slightly, like she was weighing every word carefully before letting it out.

 

Finally, she spoke, her voice lower than before. “You can’t be alone with her. Not once. Not even for a second.”

 

Uzi frowned. “That doesn’t seem too—”

 

“No.” V cut her off, voice firm. “It sounds easy, sure. But it’s not. What if you have to go to the bathroom? Or if you get separated from the group for like, ten seconds ? That’s all it’d take. J’s not the type to hesitate. If she sees the window, she’ll take it.”

 

That made Uzi pause. Her arms crossed tighter over her chest, a faint chill crawling across her frame. She shifted her weight uncomfortably and glanced to the side, not wanting to meet V’s eyes. She felt sick to her stomach.

 

This wasn’t some dramatic overreaction—V wasn’t a liar, and she wasn’t being paranoid. If she was saying this, then she meant it.

 

Uzi swallowed hard. “…What about N? I’m usually around him,” she admitted, her voice quieter now. “Like… most of the time, now that I think about it. Do you think she’d try anything even if I was alone with him, just because he’s also a disassembly drone?”

 

V blinked, caught slightly off guard by the question—but it only lasted a moment. Her face quickly fell into something unreadable, like even she wasn’t sure how to answer that. Her brows furrowed, and she pressed her back harder against the wall, fidgeting with the hem of her sleeve.

 

“…Honestly?” she muttered, not meeting Uzi’s gaze. “I don’t know. I want  to say no, since she knows how N is. But I wouldn’t put it past her. If she thought it was her only shot? If she was sure  it had to be done then and there? I don’t think she’d care who was in the way. Even if it was N…”

 

Uzi’s gut twisted again. There was a part of her that wanted to argue—J wouldn’t go that far, would she? Not with N around? But another part of her knew the truth: J could be ruthless. V wouldn’t be saying this if it wasn’t serious.

 

“…Great,” she muttered bitterly, gaze dropping to the floor. Her arms felt heavy now, like they weren’t even hers anymore.

 

This whole thing had spiraled into something she never could’ve imagined—and now, she had to spend the entire trip watching her back. More so than before.

 

She didn’t want to be scared. But she was. And she didn’t want V to see it.

 

Uzi’s lips pressed together in a tight, uneasy line. Her shoulders were stiff, her arms folded tighter as if trying to brace herself against the weight of everything she’d just learned.

 

After a long beat, she spoke—quiet, but sharp-edged with disbelief. “…So what? You’re saying I shouldn’t even be alone with N anymore?”

 

V didn’t look all that concerned. She gave a tired shrug, arms hanging loose at her sides now. “I mean, probably not,” she said flatly. “But… knowing him, if J actually tried something, he wouldn’t just stand there and let it happen.”

 

Uzi didn’t respond at first. That was… supposed to be comforting, wasn’t it?

 

But it didn’t feel that way.

 

She couldn’t tell if her chest felt tight from fear, or from something else entirely. The thought of N getting hurt—because of her —sent a ripple of panic through her. But then again, the idea that even with him there, she might still not be safe…

 

She felt cold. Numb, even.

 

Would he really be able to stop J? Or would J tear through him, too?

 

Uzi closed her eyes for a moment, drawing in a shaky breath she didn’t even realize she needed. She was so tired . Not just physically—but mentally. Emotionally. Every single thing V had dumped on her tonight was piling up, threatening to crush her from the inside out.

 

V must’ve noticed. Or maybe she didn’t. Either way, she stretched her arms, let out a breath that sounded like half a yawn, and turned toward the door.

 

“Anyway,” she muttered, flicking her fingers toward the light switch, “I’m going to bed.”

 

Uzi blinked. That was it? Just… end scene?

 

But honestly, what else was there to say?

 

This was V. Cold practicality was sort of her whole brand. Still, it felt jarring—like Uzi had just been shoved off a cliff and V was casually walking away, completely unbothered by the drop.

 

V reached for the light switch, then paused, hand hovering mid-air. She glanced over her shoulder, and her expression—just for a second—shifted.

 

Less tired. More… sincere.

 

“Do whatever you want with all that,” she said, voice softer than before. “But just… don’t let N get hurt. Please.

 

And with that, the light clicked off. The door creaked open.

 

Then closed.

 

Uzi was left standing alone in the dim glow of a nightlight plugged into an outlet near the floor, her reflection barely visible in the mirror now.

 

She didn’t move. Didn’t make a sound.

 

Her mind was racing—but her body felt like it was standing still, frozen in the weight of everything that had just unfolded.

 

She didn’t know what scared her more.

 

That J might try to kill her.

 

Or that she might not be able to stop her.

Notes:

OH. MY. GOODNESS.

This shit took me so fucking long to write 🥲

BUT IS IT WORTH IT?!?!!

Literally so much is happening and like, UGH did I cook or did I cook?! 😫 I think this turned out amazing (not tryna be egotistical I swear 💔)

I had this chapter planned out in my head for a hot minute now, and I sat down for like 3 hours yesterday and js wrote it out 😖

But this is major so I wasn’t js gonna have it be “V warns Uzi and then tells her good luck” cuz it’s so much deeper than that

I feel like this reveals a lot and V’s character cuz if she really didn’t give a fuck, like she acts, she wouldn’t go through all this trouble to tell Uzi all of this. She literally said a while ago that she would’ve killed her by now if N hadn’t convinced her not to.

I feel like V *deeply* cares abt N. Not in a romantic way or anything, but like, they’re literally childhood best friends. They’re both the first drone they knew that was also a disassembly drone, and they kinda had no one for a while until V met J.

After that, V started treating N like shit cuz I feel like even if she’d never admit it, she’s really bad with peer pressure. And J is also a disassembly drone, so V doesn’t want to seem weak in front of her, and she weirdly respects her in a way.

On the topic of N- oh my god. I feel so bad for him he’s going through so much shit 😭 I was thinking abt it though, (again, not trying to be egotistical) but I feel like I’m doing great with his backstory and shit right? It wouldn’t be as impactful if I js revealed everything all at once, but I’ve intentionally done it overtime. And he’s js going through so much omfg… his parents are pretty much completely absent in his life. His only caretaker, his grandma that he loved, died. His sister is constantly being sent away to mental hospitals cuz he catches her self harming, and now some other drone that he liked in the past thought he was a monster when she found out what he was, AND he physically fought J over that because J was going to kill her?? LIKE OMG POOR N 😭😭😭 and because of ALL of this, he has hella attachment and abandonment issues, and the fact that Uzi isn’t treating him like shit is so scary and new to him that he’s starting to become terrified of losing her.

IM SO GLAD I CAN FINALLY SAY ALL OF THAT IN ONE SENTENCE U HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG IVE WAITED TO REVEAL ALL OF TJAY 😭😫

I literally love the character development sm, and like, at the beginning it started as general ideas, and now it’s all fleshed out and I js think it’s so good. And the fact that this is obviously an AU where it’s a normal society, and in the show he doesn’t have parents or any of this happening obviously, means I could’ve done (and did-) whatever I wanted with his backstory.

I feel so bad for Uzi too cuz this is definitely so fucking overwhelming for her 🥲 like, what do you mean one of N’s friends is planning on killing her sometime within the next 4 days and she has no idea what said plan is going to be, where or when? Like that’s genuinely so scary, and the fact that it’s in so little time too, Uzi could literally count her hours, poor girl 💔

And how is she even gonna begin to process all of this shit abt N? Like also, what do you mean there was “someone else” before her? She doesn’t know weather to feel jealous, hurt, or to start falling for N even more because there’s the possibility that she means even more to him than she could ever know?

LIKE AHHH SO MUCH DRAMA I love it- and also expect more angst too 😈 not saying any more than that 🤭

Idk how long the next chapter is gonna be. I should post it Friday hopefully? That’s what I’m aiming for cuz I really wanna post it then. At the absolute latest I’ll post it Saturday.

Hope you guys enjoyed all of this. Can’t wait to post the next chapter! See yall then!

(Also, sorry if there’s a bunch of double spacing. I’ve noticed after things I italicized it js automatically double spaces stuff? I’ve been looking back on previous chapters and it pisses me off. Gonna go fix it after I post this one 😭💔 OKAY BYEEE)

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

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EDIT: OKAY HOLY FUCK SORRY GUYS but I can’t post today since I don’t have time 🥲 (it’s 6/21/25) super busy since I’m going on a vacation next week. BUT 100% ILL POST 2 TOMORROW and they should be good so I hope they make up for not posting today 😓 so sorry 💔

Chapter 79: Separation

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi stepped out of the elevator, her steps light but her thoughts unbearably heavy.

 

Just a few feet ahead of her, she could see J, V, and Lizzy walking side by side—laughing about something she couldn’t hear. Her eyes lingered on J in particular, her silhouette cutting cleanly through the morning bustle of the hotel corridor.

 

It was strange. Surreal, even. Just hours ago, Uzi had been standing in a dimly lit bathroom with V, trying to wrap her head around the possibility that the same drone casually walking ahead of her now might try—no, was planning to kill her.

 

The only reason she hadn’t felt a cold spike of dread riding the elevator with them was because Lizzy had been there too—chatty, oblivious, and loud enough to count as a buffer. Uzi had made sure not to stand too close to J. She hadn’t said a word the whole ride down.

 

Now that she was alone again, trailing slightly behind, the tension returned. That thick, heavy fog of what if that V had planted in her mind the night before.

 

And still… she hadn’t processed most of it. How could she? There had been no time to. As soon as she’d climbed back into bed last night, her body had given up the fight, sleep taking over before she could even pull the blankets over her shoulders.

 

Not that she felt rested.

 

More like… drained. Mentally, emotionally, even physically. Like her mind was trying to tread water, but the tide just kept rising.

 

She let out a slow breath, forcing herself to focus on the now.

 

Today was the second day of the trip. That much she knew. Everyone was supposed to be meeting in the hotel lobby again, just like the morning before. The field trip chaperones were probably somewhere in the crowd already, waving clipboards and trying to herd the mass of students into some kind of organized chaos.

 

Right. Today was the museum day. She remembered N telling her that yesterday—his voice soft, a little excited. He liked stuff like that, didn’t he?

 

The thought of him brought a flicker of warmth to her chest… followed almost instantly by a twist of guilt and uncertainty.

 

After what V had told her about that  other drone—how close N had been with her, how bad things had gone—Uzi didn’t know how to feel. Did any of what N said to her actually mean something unique? Or was it just something he did… something he said to anyone he got close with?

 

She shook her head hard, like the motion could physically shove the thought aside.

 

Not now.

 

She had too much to deal with already. She couldn’t afford to fall apart again. Not when J might be watching. Not when she didn’t even know the full story.

 

Sighing, Uzi pulled out her phone from her pocket. She needed to find her group.

 

Her eyes scanned the mass of students gathering in the hotel lobby, none of them immediately familiar. She felt oddly separate from it all, like the weight of what she was carrying internally had created a barrier between her and everyone else.

 

Still, she had to act normal.

 

With her phone clutched in both hands, she stared back down at the glowing screen. The list of contacts blurred slightly under her gaze. Instinctively, her thumb hovered over N’s name.

 

Normally, that would’ve been her go-to. She’d just shoot him a quick “Where are you?” and that would be that. But now, even that felt risky. Too risky. What if he wasn’t with the group? What if they ended up wandering the crowded lobby, trying to find each other, and ended up in a secluded area? What if for even a moment, they were alone?

 

What if J found them before they found anyone else?

 

Her stomach knotted at the thought. V’s warning echoed like a sharp whisper in the back of her mind: Even a second.

 

Uzi grit her teeth, blinking once, firmly. She needed to stop spiraling.

 

Instead, she quickly backed out of her contacts and opened the group chat—the one with all her friends. That was the smart thing to do. The safer option. She didn’t know why she hadn’t thought of it sooner.

 

Her thumbs moved fast as she typed out the message.

 

Uzi [10:08 AM]: where r u guys?

 

Short. Simple. Casual. She wasn’t trying to seem anxious…even though she totally was.

 

She stared at the screen for a few seconds, eyes darting between messages that hadn’t changed. Still no reply.

 

Uzi let out a quiet, annoyed exhale through her nose. She tapped the screen to refresh it, then again. She opened the chat, closed it. Reopened it. Nothing. Her foot began tapping against the tile floor, the sound getting lost in the ambient hum of the crowd moving around her.

 

Then—finally—a small ding.

 

Her eyes flicked down immediately.

 

Rebecca 🌺 [10:10 PM]: we’re at the same spot as yesterday near reception desk 😌

 

Relief passed over Uzi’s face like a quick breeze. She didn’t bother typing a reply—instead, she just reacted with a thumbs-up emoji. It got the job done.

 

She pocketed her phone and took in a breath, steadying herself. That wasn’t so hard. She just needed to keep doing the smart thing. Play it safe. Keep moving.

 

Weaving through the sea of students and faculty crowding the lobby, Uzi ducked her head slightly and pushed forward. She kept her gaze locked on the far end of the room—toward the wide reception desk where they’d gathered the morning before. That’s where they’d be. That’s where he’d be.

 

She didn’t know what kind of expression she’d wear when she saw N. Or what she’d say.

 

But… she’d figure it out. One step at a time.

 

Uzi pushed her way through the last few bodies in the crowd, steadying herself as she nearly stumbled over a bag someone had dropped carelessly on the floor. She caught her balance just in time—and that’s when she saw them.

 

Her group was gathered off to the side near the reception desk, just like Rebecca had said.

 

Thad spotted her first—his posture slouched, hands stuffed in his jacket pockets. He threw her a casual wave, his usual lopsided grin tugging at his mouth like he’d just rolled out of bed five minutes ago.

 

Uzi lifted her hand in return, more out of reflex than anything else. She was still stuck in her own head.

 

Rebecca noticed her next and lit up with a cheery “Hey!” as she stepped a little closer. “How’re you doing?”

 

Uzi shrugged, sliding her hands into her hoodie pockets. “Fine, I guess,” she muttered, her tone neutral, not cold—but not exactly warm either.

 

Rebecca didn’t seem to pick up on it, though. She just smiled and rejoined the others.

 

Emily paused mid-sentence in whatever story she was telling Darren and glanced over. “Morning, Uzi,” she said, offering a quick wave. Her voice was bright, but distracted—already halfway turned back toward Darren before Uzi could say anything in return.

 

Darren gave her a polite nod in greeting and went right back to nodding along to whatever Emily was saying. Thad leaned in to comment on something, and just like that, the rest of the group folded back into conversation, laughter bubbling between all of them. Or, well, all of them except one.

 

Uzi let her gaze drift… until it landed on him.

 

N.

 

His eyes had already found her. The second she’d stepped within range, his entire demeanor shifted—like a flicker of warm light turning on. His posture straightened, a quiet energy lighting up his features. He took a step forward, instinctive and eager, a small but genuine smile forming at the corners of his mouth.

 

Uzi smiled too… but it didn’t reach her eyes.

 

It was faint. Hesitant. And above all, tinged with something else—something she didn’t quite know how to name. Bittersweet was the closest word that came to mind.

 

Because seeing him hurt, just a little. Not because of him, but because of everything she now knew. What V had told her. What J suspected. What might happen—what could.

 

She didn’t even know where to start. Or how. Or when.

 

And yet, there he was. Looking at her like she hadn’t been weighing every thought she had of him in the dark the night before.

 

Uzi’s gaze dropped, unable to meet his eyes. She didn’t want to flinch. Didn’t want him to see how heavy her thoughts were. How much they were dragging behind her like iron.

 

Not yet.

 

N noticed almost immediately—something in Uzi’s expression faltered, like the weight behind her eyes had quietly multiplied. His smile gentled, the brightness in his gaze giving way to concern.

 

He leaned forward slightly, voice low and careful. “Did you sleep okay?”

 

The question was simple. Innocent. But to Uzi, it hit far harder than he probably intended.

 

She almost winced. The echo of last night came flooding back—V’s voice in the bathroom, her words pressed like cold iron to Uzi’s mind. Everything she had learned. Everything she now had to relay to N.

 

She pressed her lips into a thin, uneasy line, her arms still tucked in her pockets. “Kind of,” she replied flatly.

 

N tilted his head slightly at the clipped response, but before he could ask more, Uzi lifted her gaze and met his eyes. Her own were steadier now, though the tightness around them betrayed how much it took just to say what came next.

 

“I need to talk to you,” she said, quiet but firm. “It’s serious.”

 

N’s eyes widened a touch, his brows drawing in as his posture straightened, alert. His mouth opened, voice laced with concern. “What’s wrong—did something happen—?”

 

But he didn’t get to finish.

 

A sharp, amplified voice cut through the lobby like a siren. Both Uzi and N—and nearly every other drone in the crowded space—snapped their heads toward the source.

 

Near the entrance stood one of the field trip guides, the same one from the day before. He was looking out over the crowd with mild exasperation.

 

Once the low murmur of the crowd dulled and attention shifted his way, he called out, ”Good morning, everyone!” his voice was booming and almost a little too chipper for the hour. “Glad to see all of you made it downstairs in one piece.”

 

Uzi blinked, her chest still faintly tight from her interrupted conversation with N. She tried to focus, standing a little straighter, even as the thoughts clawing at her mind refused to let go.

 

The guide continued after giving the crowd a beat to settle. “Alright! So, just to go over today’s agenda—this is our second day here, but really, it’s the first official one, since yesterday was all about getting settled in. Today, we’ve got a visit scheduled at the city’s historical museum.”

 

Uzi didn’t react outwardly, but her thoughts buzzed again, even as she stood still beside N. Her nerves hadn't eased—in fact, they’d only sharpened. She still had to talk to him. But now, she’d have to wait.

 

The guide's voice continued on from the front of the lobby, waving one hand in the air like he was conducting a particularly uninspired orchestra.

 

“Once I’m done talking, the chaperones’ll start headcounts. So make sure all your buddies have made it down, we don’t wanna leave anyone behind!“ he laughed slightly as if that was supposed to be funny, but when he noticed no one reacted he cleared his throat awkwardly,”Anyways, to be more specific about where we’re going, we’re heading to the New Ore History Museum this morning. Remember to take notes—it will count toward your field trip assignment, and also…”

 

The second Uzi heard the words ‘notes’ and ‘assignment,’ she was done listening. Her interest had plummeted straight through the floor.

 

She rolled her eyes, exhaling through her nose and muttering under her breath, “This is the stupidest thing ever.”

 

N, standing beside her, glanced over curiously. “Hmm?”

 

She shifted her weight, turning just enough to face him with a slight tilt of her head.

 

“This assignment? I could care less,” she muttered, voice low and dismissive. “I’ll probably just do it last minute and hope it’s good enough to pass…” she said, thinking out loud.

 

There was a pause. N rubbed the back of his neck with one hand, his expression softening with that ever-present warmth. “Well… if you want, I could help,” he offered sheepishly. “Like… if it gets confusing or something.”

 

It was such a him thing to say—gentle and unassuming. And it caught Uzi off guard. It shouldn’t have, but it did.

 

Her eyes flicked up to meet his fully for the first time that morning, and for a moment her chest tightened.

 

Why did he still look at her like that? Like he even cared. She obviously was aware that he had no idea what she now knew… but still. It made her feel… undeserving. Distant.

 

She quickly broke eye contact, gaze dropping toward the ground as she shook her head. “It’s fine,” she said a little too fast. “You don’t have to do that.” Her voice was quiet but final.

 

N nudged her gently with his elbow, the movement light but intentional. “It’s alright,” he said softly, and Uzi could hear the smile in his voice even without looking. “I really don’t mind.”

 

She didn’t respond right away. Normally, she’d toss out a sarcastic quip or accept the help without thinking twice—maybe even tease him for trying to be so helpful. But now, the idea of spending time with him like that felt... dangerous. Not because of him, but because of everything surrounding him. Surrounding them.

 

If they met up—what if J saw? What if they didn’t see her and thought they were safe, just like the library? What if she followed them?

 

And then her thoughts turned darker, spiraling toward the pit she kept trying to avoid. Also, did N actually care? Or was she just a replacement? A convenient echo of that drone from before—the one who ran, who couldn’t handle the truth. Was that what he saw in her? Just a version of that drone that stayed, who hadn’t fled at the first sign of who he really was?

 

No. Stop.

 

Uzi clenched her jaw slightly and shook her head in a sharp, near-invisible motion, like she could physically shake the thoughts out of her skull.

 

She hated how loud her mind got when she didn’t want it to. Hated how something as simple as a kind offer from N could make her feel so... tangled. And not in the same way as before. This time, it wasn’t a warm feeling she got, it wasn’t butterflies in her stomach. It was sheer dread. Like something would go terribly wrong if she gave in.

 

Her hand moved instinctively to the spot on her arm where he’d nudged her, fingers curling gently around it like she could hold the warmth there and keep it from spreading to the rest of her.

 

She turned her body slightly, facing further away from him now, her voice quieter than before. “Really,” she murmured, “it’s fine.”

 

She felt his eyes on her. Not in a judgmental way—never that—but with that quiet, worried softness that only made her chest feel heavier. He was probably wondering what was wrong, probably overthinking it the same way she was. And that stung more than she expected.

 

Because she wanted to look at him. She wanted things to go back to how they were yesterday , or heck, literally any time before last night then.

 

But now, everything was different… even if he didn’t know it yet.

 

Uzi was barely registering the field trip guide’s voice anymore—his words had become little more than muffled background noise to her thoughts, like a lecture she had no energy left to process.

 

She was too distracted, lost in the spiral of her own mind, weighing one anxious possibility after another.

 

It wasn’t until she felt a sharp nudge to her shoulder—rougher than N’s usual gentle ones—that her thoughts snapped back into the present.

 

She knew that wasn’t N.

 

She turned her head with a glare already locked and loaded.

 

Of course. Thad.

 

He stood behind her, trying and failing to look innocent with that smug grin stretching across his face. “Someone had to snap you out of your little daydream,” he said with a shrug, completely unbothered. “Didn’t want you to get flattened by the herd.”

 

Uzi’s frown deepened. “Seriously? I’m not gonna get trampled.

 

Thad’s smirk widened, leaning a little closer just to be annoying. “You sure? It’s pretty easy to lose sight of you in a crowd.”

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed into slits. “If you’re insinuating that I’m short, I will strangle you.”

 

Thad held his hands up, mock-defensive. “Hey, hey—I never said that.” His tone was light, smug, like he was thoroughly enjoying getting under her skin.

 

Uzi rolled her eyes with an annoyed scoff. “Do you even know what insinuating means?”

 

Thad shrugged again. “Not part of my vocabulary. I’m not a nerd like you.”

 

With that, he breezed past her, still grinning. And, of course, he had to throw in the last word, speeding up just enough that Uzi’s irritation snapped.

 

She moved her foot in front of his to trip him.  He stumbled forward with a surprised noise, catching himself just before he faceplanted. He glanced back over his shoulder with a crooked grin. “Missed me!”

 

Then he was gone, laughing as he caught up with Darren, leaving Uzi behind with a scowl curling on her lips—but something else flickering beneath it too.

 

She let out a soft scoff and shook her head, folding her arms across her chest as a reluctant smile crept onto her face. Thad might’ve been an annoying little gremlin, but somehow, even his dumb jokes had a way of easing her tension—if only for a second.

 

In a way, it was weird, how comfortable she was around him. Stupid, loud, always-poking-fun Thad. She wasn’t this close to practically any other drone, except maybe N, but that was different.

 

Maybe it was because they had known each other since middle school. Robo-god, she was so grateful that they managed to become friends again after all those years. And of course he’d be the drone who still managed to make her laugh, even after everything last night.

 

But just as that fleeting calm began to settle, a quiet voice beside her made her flinch.

 

"Hey."

 

Uzi startled instinctively, jerking slightly backwards. She quickly masked her surprise, though, pretending like nothing had happened, and shoved her hands deep into her pockets, casually brushing it off.

 

“Yeah?” she asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

 

But the second she really looked at him, her stomach twisted.

 

N’s usual brightness was dimmed. He wasn’t fidgeting in his usual awkward, chatty way. Instead, there was a hesitance to him—like he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to be standing next to her. His eyes flicked away when they met hers, and he rubbed the back of his neck, voice softer than usual.

 

“So, uh… do you maybe want to sit with me on the bus?” he asked, glancing back at her only briefly. “Since… you said you needed to talk to me about something.”

 

Uzi hesitated.

 

Her first instinct was to say no. Not because she didn’t want to—but because her brain immediately flashed to everything V had told her. Was this safe? Was it risky? Would sitting next to him paint a bigger target on her back?

 

But… the bus would be packed. J wasn’t going to try anything in plain view of a dozen other drones.

 

And honestly, if she was going to tell him anything… she didn’t want to do it while walking, or while distracted.

 

So, she nodded. “Sure,” she said, quietly.

 

She tried to tack on a smile—something small and maybe a little reassuring—but the moment her eyes flicked up and caught his expression, it faltered.

 

Even if N looked composed, she could see the shift. Something in his body language—shoulders a little stiffer, smile a little more uncertain.

 

He definitely felt like something was wrong.

 

And of course he did. She had been acting cold, distant, weird all morning. She hated herself a little for that.

 

He hadn’t even done anything… not really. And yet here she was, keeping him at arm’s length, because she was scared. Because she didn’t know how to deal with everything. Because she was still trying to protect both of them from something she didn’t know how to stop.

 

She turned her gaze downward, silently cursing the war going on in her head.

 

This was going to be a long bus ride.

 

As the crowd funneled toward the exit, Uzi naturally drifted beside N, their steps syncing without effort. There was something familiar—something comforting—about simply walking beside him. She didn’t say anything at first. She didn’t need to. His quiet presence was loud enough in her mind already.

 

Her eyes flicked over to him, just for a second.

 

She just… wanted to look at him. To really see him, take in the gentle way he walked, the faint bounce in his step, the nervous fidgeting with his sleeves. She wanted to hear his voice again—talk to him properly, like she had literally just yesterday. But that was before she found out everything last night, before everything suddenly turned complicated in a really negative way.

 

She missed him already, even though he was right beside her.

 

And yet, even as her chest ached with the urge to open up, to lean into that comfort, something inside her kept bracing. It was like her mind was still on high alert, gripping tightly to every warning V had given her.

 

She wanted  to speak. But another part of her—the scared part—just wanted to disappear. To shove all of this deep down and pretend like it wasn’t happening.

 

Still, she knew that wouldn’t work. She had  to talk to him. Soon. Maybe once they were on the bus, tucked away in their little seat. She always felt safer there, like the rest of the world didn’t matter for a moment.

 

She blinked hard, pulling herself back from the swirl of thoughts. She turned her head to say something—

 

But her words died in her throat.

 

N wasn’t there.

 

Her heart skipped a beat. He had been right next to her. Just seconds ago. She spun her head to the other side—nothing. He wasn’t behind her either. She even slowed her pace, her gaze sweeping the crowd with growing unease.

 

Where the hell did he go?

 

He was just there. What happened?

 

Her pulse quickened. Panic started to rise like a lump in her throat.

 

The moment she fully comprehended that N had vanished into the sea of drones, Uzi’s sense of disorientation sharpened. The lobby felt like it had doubled in size. Voices echoed louder, the shuffle of footsteps grew more urgent, and the crowd pressed in from every side.

 

She rocked up onto the tips of her toes, trying to see above the mob of heads. It was no use—she was barely tall enough to see past the first few drones ahead.

 

Still, she caught a glimpse of the bus parked outside, and the line of students slowly making their way up the steps as a few chaperones guided them along, clipboards in hand and voices hoarse from wrangling the group.

 

Uzi dropped back down onto her heels with an annoyed huff, slouching her shoulders. Of course  this would happen to her. Why wouldn’t it? She clenched her jaw and stared straight ahead, letting the flow of bodies carry her forward whether she liked it or not.

 

Her thoughts were spiraling again. What if J found N first? What if she was already planning something? And why was it so easy for Uzi to lose track of the one drone she wanted to be closest to?

 

“Uzi.”

 

Her heart jumped in her chest when she heard someone bark her name beside her.

 

She snapped her head to the right, bracing herself—and nearly groaned aloud when she recognized the deadpan tone.

 

V.

 

The other drone looked just as unbothered as always, her posture relaxed despite the moving crowd around them. Her expression was unreadable, a brow lazily raised as she looked Uzi over like she hadn’t just startled her half to death.

 

“What are you doing here?” Uzi hissed, a little louder than she intended, her shoulders still tense with leftover panic.

 

V just gave a half-hearted shrug. “Same thing you are. Didn’t expect to run into you, though.”

 

That made Uzi pause.

 

She hadn’t been looking for her.

 

It was just… coincidence.

 

For some reason, that almost disappointed her. She didn’t know why she expected V to show up on purpose—maybe she thought V would might have better news. Maybe there was some inkling of hope left in her that V would tell her she convinced J to stop whatever dumb plan she had. Maybe she would tell Uzi that everything she said about N wasn’t true and she made it up…

 

Regardless, after last night, it kind of felt like they were actually on the same side now. If V seriously didn’t care, she wouldn’t have told Uzi everything she had. Maybe now, they weren’t necessarily friends… but not necessarily enemies either.

 

Uzi barely had time to process that thought before the crowd forced her onward again, her shoulder brushing against strangers and chaperones alike. Stopping wasn’t an option. If she didn’t keep walking, she was going to get shoved out of the way—or trampled.

 

She gave V one last glance, then faced forward again, biting the inside of her cheek. Her eyes flicked around the crowd, still searching. Where was N?

 

Uzi’s thoughts were a whirlwind—unease pressing down on her chest and making every second stretch. She turned sharply to V, barely registering her own words as they tumbled out.

 

“Can I stick with you?”

 

It came out faster than she meant it to, edged with a note of desperation. She didn’t even care if it sounded pathetic—N had completely vanished in the chaos, and the idea of ending up on a bus next to some drone she didn’t know, forced to endure the awkward silence or worse, forced small talk, made her stomach churn. Honestly? V was the safest option she had at the moment.

 

To her immense relief, V didn’t question it. She just gave her usual indifferent shrug and muttered, “Sure. I’ve got nothing better to do anyway.”

 

Uzi decided to ignore her snide undertone.

 

The two of them shuffled toward the front of the bus, blending in with the rest of the crowd. The line was moving quickly now, and before she knew it, she was stepping onto the metal stairs, the hum of the engine vibrating through her legs as the bus idled in place.

 

Her eyes scanned the rows like a radar, half-hoping she’d spot N’s messy hair or familiar face, tucked somewhere in one of the seats—but there was no sign of him. No stupidly warm smile waiting for her.

 

Her heart sank.

 

The middle rows were mostly empty, so Uzi slid into one of the seats, settling in with a sigh she barely managed to stifle.

 

V followed without a word, dropping into the seat beside her with practiced nonchalance and folding her arms across her chest like she was gearing up for a long ride.

 

Uzi leaned slightly against the window, her gaze distant.

 

So much for finding N. So much for telling him everything. The crowd had swept him away like it always did with the things that mattered most, and now she was left stewing in her own thoughts—again.


She glanced at V.

 

V wasn’t exactly easy  to talk to, but after last night, Uzi knew she could talk to her. And maybe… maybe she needed to. Even if V was blunt and kind of impossible sometimes, she always told the truth. And right now, Uzi could really use some honesty.

 

She shifted slightly, fiddling with the sleeve of her hoodie.

 

Maybe this was her best shot at figuring out what the hell she was supposed to do next.

Notes:

OMFGGGGG FINALLYYYY I POSTED 😫

I’ve been wanting to so bad but I haven’t had the time to edit the chapter 😓

I feel so bad for not posting yesterday like I said I would 💔 I hope this chapter is good enough that it makes up for it-

I haven’t had too much angst recently in the story until, like, now 🥲 I don’t think that’s a bad thing though, in a way. But the angst in this chapter is VERY minor.

Like, Uzi is js really fucking convicted on how to feel. Should she be mad at N about the whole thing with that other drone, cuz even if she’d never admit it she’s kinda jealous, and she’s scared that what’s going on between them meant and means nothing cuz what if he’s been thinking of her this whole time?

And now Uzi’s *kind of* attachment issues are starting to show a little bit more cuz she *wants* to be by N, she wants to talk to him, but she’s so conflicted that she also feels like she needs to space herself from him.

And on top of that, the paranoia abt J?! Like that’s REALLY fucking with her, like big time. I can understand though in a way cuz I would be paranoid asf too if I was told someone was planning to kill me, and at any moment if they had the slightest of opportunities they would take it. I feel so bad for her cuz that sounds so stressful 🥲

And then worst of all, as soon as she was about to have the chance to tell him, they get separated on accident because Uzi was so lost in thought that she wandered in the wrong direction, and somehow N did too (maybe he’s also worrying abt what’s going on cuz he *doesnt* know what it is. He just knows something is VERY wrong. I won’t say more abt that though cuz I don’t wanna give away too much abt what he’s thinking- I’ll js say it’ll become more apparent soon 🤭)

Also I love how Uzi and V are starting to finally *kind of* get along/tolerate each other a bit more. Maybe we’ll see more of that in the next chapter, but who knows 🤷

Oh and also, since my chapter updates have been really long in between recently, I’ll tell yall one thing. Js… brace yourself for a solid amount of angst soon. The angst in this chapter isn’t much compared to… other things

BUT you didn’t hear that from me 👀

OKAY so abt the next chapter update,,, im on vacation rn until Wednesday 💔 at a beach, and omfg I haven’t been to the beach in so long I’m so excited 😫

So idk when the next chapter will be. I’ll post if I have the chance to on the trip, cuz I REALLY want to, but if not I should post again on like Wednesday or Thursday 🥲 really sorry abt that. Updates should be more consistent after that, or that’s what I’m planning on at least.

That’s abt it for what I had to say. See yall soon in the next chapter!!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 80: Reassurance

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi found herself watching V without meaning to, eyes locked onto her profile like maybe—somehow—just looking would help her find the right words. Her mind was cluttered, packed with every spiraling thought she hadn’t had the chance to unload.

 

Maybe… it was alright if she talked to V. She couldn’t talk to anyone else about the whole situation, and V was the one of two drones who actually knew and were on her side, the other being N. But, obviously, she couldn’t talk to N right now like she had been wanting to… and even then, now that she thought about it—how should she begin to explain what V had told her last night? Why hadn’t she considered that before asking N to talk?

 

It should’ve been as easy as just telling him J was actively planning to kill her. But that just didn’t feel right, saying it like that, so matter of factly. And even if she said it like that, even if she had the chance to talk to N right now—if she’s being completely honest with herself, she probably would’ve froze up. It would’ve been so hard for her to just push the words out, and whenever she figured out how to, she probably wouldn’t have handled it to well…

 

And on top of that, she wanted—no, needed to confront him about the other drone V told her about. She had to know if everything that’s happened between her and N ever meant anything to him. It meant so, so much to her—even if that was sappy to admit. But if he had never actually thought about it more than just her being a replacement for some other girl… Uzi didn’t want to think how she would react to that.

 

Maybe this wasn’t a bad thing. And though she knew V wasn’t exactly known for her warmth—right now, Uzi didn’t need warmth. She needed clarity. Someone to ground her.

 

So, she couldn’t take this time for granted.

 

She blinked slowly. She hadn’t realized how hard she was staring until V turned her head, giving her a flat look.

 

“You gonna talk,” V asked dryly, “or just burn a hole through my face?”

 

Uzi startled, her thoughts scattering like marbles. “Huh?”

 

Oh, great. She’d been staring . That was absolutely mortifying. Real subtle, Uzi.

 

Trying to save face, she yanked her gaze away and crossed her arms tightly over her chest, attempting to recover whatever dignity she had left. Her voice came out a little too defensive as she mumbled, “Yeah. Just—hold on.”

 

V didn’t push. She leaned back slightly, her usual vaguely bored expression settling across her face, but there was still an edge of attentiveness in her eyes—like she was ready to listen, even if she didn’t act like it.

 

Uzi let out a breath. This wasn’t easy. Her voice was quiet when she finally forced out the words, “Do you mind if I… talk to you? Like, for real?”

 

V didn’t blink. She simply shrug, casual as ever. “Shoot.”

 

That one word was all Uzi needed to keep going, even if she still felt like she was dragging every sentence out of herself like it weighed a thousand tons. She shifted in her seat, hugging her arms tighter around her body like she was trying to protect something fragile—probably her own nerves.

 

Uzi let out a breath and dropped her gaze to her lap. “I need advice,” she admitted, the words slipping out like a sigh.

 

V raised a brow slightly, but didn’t interrupt. She could tell V wanted her to specify.

 

Uzi’s tone dipped into something wearier, heavier. “About N. About what you told me last night.”

 

Still, V said nothing. She only tilted her head a little, waiting.

 

Uzi dragged a hand through her hair, frustration starting to poke at her chest. “I mean—I don’t even know how to bring it up. Like, how am I supposed to just— tell him that J’s gonna try to kill me sometime during the trip? Not to mention that other drone you told me about, how do I bring that up? And then how do I tell him I’m scared and don’t know what to do? Like—how do you even say that?!”

 

She pressed her hands to her face, breathing in deeply. She felt completely scrambled, raw at the edges.

 

And now that she’d started talking… she wasn’t sure she could stop.

 

V blinked once. Her expression stayed unreadable, her tone blunt as ever. “Just be straight with him. No sugarcoating.”

 

Uzi groaned, throwing her hands in the air for a second before dropping them onto her lap. “I know that!” she snapped, louder than she meant to. “I already asked him to talk, I was gonna do that, but it’s just—” She broke off with a frustrated noise, shaking her head. “It’s different now.”

 

V narrowed her eyes, clearly unamused. “How so?”

 

Uzi stared at her, then let out a tired sigh. “Because of that drone you told me about. The one N used to be close with—” The words came out sharp, like they’d been stuck in her throat too long.

 

V’s expression didn’t budge. “Can you stop yelling?” she said flatly.

 

That made Uzi flinch. She hadn’t even realized she was being loud. Her voice dropped instantly. “Right—sorry.”

 

She leaned back against the seat, hands tightening in her sleeves. “It just… it feels weird now. Talking to him. Even being around him feels… I don’t know, off. I feel off. I haven’t had a second to even begin sorting any of this out.”

 

As soon as the words left her mouth, the bus gave a gentle lurch beneath them, pulling away from the curb. Uzi barely noticed it. She was too tangled in her thoughts.

 

It was strange, being this open in front of V—of all drones—but once she’d started talking, the weight of it all kept pouring out. She couldn’t hold it in anymore.

 

V glanced at her sideways, resting her head slightly against the seat but keeping her eyes on Uzi. “Why do you think that is?”

 

Uzi hesitated. She hated questions like that—questions that made her think too hard about herself. Her gaze dropped to the floor, voice softening further.

 

“…Because I’ve always been bad at dealing with stuff like this,” she admitted. “With complicated feelings. With… processing. And N—he’s the only drone I’ve ever been this close to. I’ve never had something like this before. So now, knowing everything I know, it just… hurts. And I don’t even fully get why.”

 

Her shoulders tensed. She felt embarrassed again, but this time it wasn’t about staring, or yelling. This was just raw honesty—and that was always worse.

 

V, surprisingly, didn’t fire off some dry remark or scoff at Uzi’s emotional honesty.

 

She just glanced away for a moment, arms loosely crossed, her expression unreadable—then finally spoke.

 

“Start by actually talking to him,” she said, voice steady. “You’re not gonna figure out anything by spiraling alone. Just get the closure. Say it out loud. That’s how you stop overthinking.”

 

Uzi blinked, a little stunned. That was… actual advice. Good advice, even. Not a sarcastic jab. She hadn’t expected something so level-headed to come from V, again out of all drones. It made her sit up a bit straighter.

 

“Okay, but still, how am I supposed to talk—”

 

V cut her off with a sharp wave of her hand. “Like I said. Be direct. Tell him what you know about J, and talk that through. Then…” she rolled her eyes, “tell him how you feel about the other drone thing. Why it’s bothering you so much or why you’re all… hurt, or whatever.”

 

She trailed off, muttering under her breath, “Still don’t know why I even told you all that.”

 

Uzi didn’t react to that last part. She was too focused on replaying V’s words in her head.

 

So… it really was  that simple? Just talk to N. About everything. No games, no avoiding it. That approach made more sense than anything else she’d thought up. It cut right through the noise in her head.

 

And the second part—telling him how she feels —that one was harder. Talking about her emotions had never come naturally. But maybe she didn’t need to be perfect. Maybe it was enough to just be honest. Even if it came out messy, at least it would be real.

 

She shifted in her seat, arms folded, her expression tight but more focused than before. V had handed her something unexpected—clarity. Now, it was on Uzi to act on it.

 

Uzi let the smallest breath slip through her lips as she looked over at V, whose gaze had actually softened a little—for once not twisted into her usual eye-roll-ready scowl.

 

That alone made Uzi hesitate before speaking, her voice quieter now, more sincere.

 

“Thanks,” she said.

 

V glanced over at her with a brow raised.

 

Uzi held the moment. “For telling me all of that. I… I really needed it.”

 

She ran a hand through her hair again, tugging slightly at the ends out of sheer nervous energy. She still felt stiff, like her thoughts hadn’t quite caught up to her body, but something in her chest didn’t feel as heavy as before. Not gone, but lighter.

 

V just muttered, “No problem,” under her breath, but she didn’t say it coldly. Just like everything else today, it felt… different.

 

There was a lull between them then—quiet, natural. Uzi figured that was the cue to settle in. She slid her headphones out from her bag and reached for her phone. She could chew over everything V had said, maybe try to form the right words for N later, and let her music distract her in the meantime.

 

She started scrolling through her playlist, trying to figure out a good song to listen to. But before she could even consider which song, she heard her name.

 

“Uzi.”

 

Her eyes flicked sideways. V wasn’t even looking at her now—she was staring out the window, her voice lower than before.

 

“I meant what I said last night,” V continued. “Don’t let him get hurt.”

 

Uzi blinked. Her mind darted back to that moment—the sharpness in V’s tone as she flicked off the bathroom light and said it like it mattered. Like it really, truly mattered.

 

For a second, Uzi didn’t know what to say. Then, before she could stop herself, the thought came tumbling out—dry and half-joking, but with something real beneath it. “So you do care after all.”

 

V looked over at her, visibly caught off guard, like she wasn’t expecting Uzi to say that out loud. “…What?”

 

Uzi gave a halfhearted shrug, her voice airy with feigned indifference. “I just figured you didn’t genuinely care about N. That’s all.”

 

The second it left her mouth, she realized that might’ve been a mistake.

 

V's eyes narrowed, and she shifted in her seat with a huff, arms folding tightly across her chest. “I don’t care,” she snapped quickly—too quickly. “Not that much, anyway. I just…”

 

She trailed off. There wasn’t even an attempt to finish the sentence, and the pause that followed was as loud as any argument. V turned her head sharply, facing away like that somehow erased the vulnerability she’d just shown.

 

Uzi lowered her eyes back to her phone, gently shaking her head—not out of disappointment, but to hide the smile creeping at the corner of her mouth.

 

There was something strangely satisfying about that kind of reaction—getting under V’s plating like that. Still, she resisted the urge to make a smug comment. She liked having functioning limbs, after all.

 

Instead, she continued to thumb through her playlist until she settled on something familiar and low-tempo. Something that wouldn’t distract her from her thoughts but also wouldn’t let them spiral too far. She pressed play and leaned her temple against the window, watching the buildings slide past.

 

As the bus rumbled down the road, the quiet rhythm of the music filling her ears, Uzi felt herself slip into thought. The longer she stared at the blur outside, the more her stomach twisted. They were heading to the museum now—closer to another day of pretending things were normal. Closer to talking to N. Closer to being near J.

 

She didn’t know whether to feel relieved that she finally was able to speak her mind aloud, or stress because it felt like she was heading straight into a storm.

 

Probably both.

Notes:

At first when I was writing this chapter I kinda hated it. I was trying to figure out so hard how do I make Uzi be vulnerable around V without making her be out of character and seem sensitive, or like outwardly sensitive since she always tries to mask it.

The chapter started growing on me the more I wrote though, and I really like it now 🥲 really happy with how it turned out

I was trying to think about it from Uzi’s perspective- like, she genuinely had *no one* to talk about the situation to, other than V or N. No one else could really understand it as much as they do. So, now she has a solid amount of time to actually sit and talk to V without being interrupted, so it’s like why *shouldn’t* she try talking to V. Worst thing that could happen is V makes a sarcastic comment or call Uzi a sissy for acting emotional for once or som and then js not talk to her 😭💔

Lucky for her, V wasn’t in a terrible mood so V didn’t really see much of a problem talking to Uzi, even if she’s really blunt about things. I think Uzi annoys her- not in the way that ‘oh they’re annoying because they’re obnoxious’, but like it’s frustrating for V because why does Uzi have to think so deep into things she doesn’t see as that deep? Or that’s her perspective at least. I don’t think V is an over thinker at all. Maybe a *tiny* bit, but isn’t everyone to an extent? V seems like she’s think abt things more logically, because she doesn’t wanna waste her time acting emotional. Maybe that has to do with something in her backstory, but I’m not gonna get into that rn cuz no spoilers on that

Also I think V is literally absolutely amazing at giving advice if she wants to because she thinks so logically. And she’s pretty smart too, even if she’d never directly say that, or act above others in that way like J does.

In other news, I’m finally back from my vacation. Really random to say but I haven’t been to the beach in literal *years*, so it was really nice to go back to it. But I got sunburnt so fucking bad like I’m in sm pain 😭 my whole body feels bruised 💔

I’m like, a *super* pale person, but like on purpose. Like my whole family is tan and then I look like a fucking ghost 😭 but again I like,,, purposely avoid the sun and going outside in it. Not in a vampire or like, low-life-I-need-to-touch-grass kinda way cuz I go out with friends all the time 💔 but I js don’t like being tan cuz it throws off my style and stuff 🥲 but like when I tan I tan pretty dark cuz I guess it’s a genetic thing or som, so I’ll js be red for a few days and then go through a fucking metamorphosis 😭

Ok I need to stop rambling abt that, that’s literally so random and irrelevant 😭💔

Should post the next chapter Friday. Planning for it to be a pretty good one, and should be a bit longer than this one. Also I’m so stoked with where the story is going cuz even though I’ve said it a million times I have sm planned. Sorry that my updates have been so slow recently, I promise I’m NOT losing interest in writing this 💔

ALSO apparently it’s been a bit over 5 months since I started this fic? Isn’t that insane? I never thought it was gonna last this long 😭 don’t think it’s a bad thing though. I *think* I’ve grown a lot as js a writer, since I hadn’t written for a while before then. Whenever I make another story, I think throughout the whole thing it’ll be way better than the beginning of this one.

Speaking of other stories… (shameless plug) I posted another chapter in my MD alternate universe post-apocalyptic AU. For those of you u who don’t know by now (🤓) basically it’s like, the same setup as this AU where copper-9 is js a fully functioning planet of drones, js like this one, BUT one day an apocalypse happens. And it’s a slow burn Nuzi fic too so that’s great 😌

OKAY ANYWAYS gonna go now. Bye yall, see u guys in the next chapter!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 81: Grouping

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The bus let out a wheezing hiss as it came to a stop, the weight of its brakes groaning beneath the chatter that was already beginning to swell inside.

 

Uzi blinked, glancing out the window beside her, but all she could see was the side of another tour bus parked close beside them. No clear view of the museum. Just some boring beige concrete and shadows stretching beneath the morning light.

 

She leaned back in her seat and sighed, pulling out her headphones and tucking them and her phone back into her pocket.

 

Around her, the noise level was steadily climbing—students standing up, stretching, laughing, rustling bags or jackets. The bus door hissed open at the front, and the hum of the outside world rushed in.

 

V stood up without a word. She didn’t look at Uzi or even glance back—just filed into the aisle and disappeared out of view with the stream of students.

 

Uzi didn’t take it personally. That’s just how V was. Still, some small, bitter corner of her chest ached at how easy it was for V to walk off like that after the conversation they’d just had.

 

She decided not to dwell on it.

 

Instead, she slid toward the edge of the seat and waited, letting the impatient crowd clear out. No way was she about to get jostled and knocked over by someone.

 

Once the herd had thinned, Uzi finally stood and got out of her seat, stepping into the aisle. She followed it to the end, until she stepped off the bus with a soft hop, the soles of her boots tapping against the pavement.

 

The air outside was cooler than she expected. Fresh, a little damp. She took a breath.

 

All around her, students were already breaking off into cliques—clumps of friends reuniting, chatting, checking their phones. Some were still wandering, aimless and alone, scanning the crowd or just scrolling through their screens like they didn’t know what to do with themselves.

 

No sign of V. Not that she’d really expected her to wait. Uzi tried to brush off the flicker of disappointment that crawled up her spine.

 

She rose onto her toes, stretching to peek over the heads around her, squinting in the light. She needed to find her group.

 

From where she stood in the crowd, Uzi caught a glimpse of someone familiar—a flash of dark hair tied into unmistakable pigtails, bouncing slightly as the drone moved. That had to be Emily.

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes, just to be sure, then began weaving through the bodies around her. The mass of students shifted unpredictably, and she had to crane her neck a few times to make sure she was still headed in the right direction. Finally, she reached her and tapped her lightly on the shoulder.

 

Emily turned, smiling the moment she saw Uzi. “Hey!” she greeted warmly, clearly in a good mood.

 

“Hey,” Uzi replied, a little breathless. “You know where the others are?”

 

“Yeah,” Emily nodded, gesturing back toward a spot in the crowd. “I was just about to head back. I was talking to a friend I sat with on the bus, but Rebecca and them should be just a little ahead.”

 

“Cool,” Uzi said, quietly relieved as she fell into step beside her. She stayed close, trying not to let herself get swallowed up by the ever-shifting tangle of students.

 

As they neared the group, Uzi recognized the familiar voices first—Rebecca’s, Darren’s, and Thad’s… and N’s. None of them looked up when she and Emily approached, still locked in conversation.

 

Uzi caught the tail end of Thad saying something with way too much casual energy: “—and I swear I almost killed the guy.”

 

Uzi blinked. “Wait, what?” she asked, deadpan, looking at Thad like he’d just grown a second head.

 

Thad gave a short huff of a laugh, nudging Darren with his elbow as he grinned. “I was talking about the time I pranked my friend during a sleepover. Guy was out cold, snoring like a dying vacuum cleaner—so I poured water in his mouth while he was asleep.”

 

Uzi stared at him, deadpan. “You probably almost drowned him.”

 

Thad doubled over slightly from laughing. “Totally worth it. He woke up choking* , and then tried to suffocate me with a pillowcase. Dude’s got reflexes like a feral cat.”

 

Uzi scoffed. “I would’ve done the same.”

 

Before anyone could get a word in, a loud voice cut through the noise around them.

 

It was the same field trip guide from the hotel lobby. His tone was commanding enough to hush the buzz of student chatter, and slowly the crowd quieted as drones turned to listen.

 

“In a minute,” he called out, “you’ll all be forming groups of three for the museum tour.”

 

A ripple of murmuring spread almost instantly—students immediately turning to their friends, whispering names, already laying claim to their trios.

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard. Three? That wasn’t too bad… it just meant she needed to choose carefully. Her mind darted immediately to N. If she was in a group with him, that would finally give her the chance to talk to him—maybe even get everything out that she hadn’t had the courage to say yet.

 

But it couldn’t be just the two of them. It had to be three. So who else?

 

Maybe Rebecca? She seemed like the safest option… and wouldn’t she be more understanding, since she kind of knew about her and N? Maybe, Uzi could tell her that she had to talk to N about something important. It was technically the truth—she would just leave out the specifics. Rebecca would be understanding, right?

 

She glanced subtly at her—Rebecca was silently chatting with Thad and Darren, completely unaware that Uzi’s thoughts had started spiraling again. Would she even say yes if Uzi asked her to join them? And more importantly—would J notice if she and N were paired? Would that spark more suspicion?

 

Uzi felt her arms tighten over her chest without realizing it. Her eyes flicked sideways beside her. N was standing there, a little far away—he must’ve not had the chance to say anything, or approach her. She thought so, at least, considering the fact that as soon as she walked over, she had started talking to Thad. She was surprised N hadn’t tried talking to her yet, though. Was that on purpose…? It seemed out of character for him.

 

She unintentionally stared at him from the side, thinking about what she should say. She tried not to look too eager. Or nervous. Or conflicted.

 

Before she could find the words, the field trip guide cleared his throat—loud, deliberate, and full of warning.

 

“And to be clear,” he added, raising his voice just enough, “these will be assigned  groups of three.”

 

A collective groan erupted from the students almost instantly, sharp and overlapping. Voices flared in protest— What?, Seriously?, You’ve got to be kidding!

 

Chaperones started stepping forward, hands raised in an attempt to settle the unrest. One even tried clapping to get attention back, calling out for silence like it was a classroom.

 

Uzi, meanwhile, went stiff.

 

Assigned…?

 

She had to be hearing things, right?

 

Her stomach dropped as the reality sunk in. Assigned?! Seriously? First the random roommates, and now this? What was this—some cruel social experiment?!

 

It was like every single decision the adults made on this trip was designed to ruin any sense of control she had. She didn’t even realize how tightly her arms had crossed until her fingers started digging into her sleeves.

 

She was deep in thought when she felt a light tap on her shoulder.

 

Her whole body jerked in surprise—just slightly, but it was enough to be noticeable.

 

She turned quickly, eyes wide—only to find N still standing beside her, concern etched into his expression. She must’ve not noticed that he made his way closer to her.

 

When he saw the way she flinched, his smile faltered just a bit. He looked… soft. Worried. And maybe a little unsure.

 

“Hey,” he said gently, voice low enough not to draw attention. “Where’d you go? I thought we were gonna sit together on the bus.”

 

He wasn’t accusing. Just… confused.

 

Uzi glanced away, hating how her chest ached a little at the sound of his voice. At how kind he still sounded. She forced a breath out through her nose and gave a small shrug.

 

“I guess we got separated,” she muttered, keeping her gaze somewhere around his shoulder. “In the crowd.”

 

Her tone was flat. She didn’t want it to be, but everything still felt tangled in her chest—guilt, uncertainty, and that same aching mess of hurt she hadn’t figured out how to name yet. And she couldn’t fully look at him for too long, either. The way his eyes searched hers just made it worse.

 

Uzi caught the subtle downturn of N’s mouth as his brows furrowed faintly. He rubbed the back of his neck with one hand—seemingly nervous—and mumbled an apology, his tone sheepish and guilty.

 

“Sorry about that,” he said, glancing away slightly. “I should’ve been paying more attention…”

 

Uzi pressed her hands deeper into her pockets, shrugging slightly. “It’s no big deal,” she said, keeping her voice neutral.

 

The silence that followed was thick. Neither of them moved for a moment, caught between words unsaid and words they were still scared to say. The quiet hum of the crowd that swelled around them, and the voice of the field trip chaperone speaking seemed distant and irrelevant.

 

Then, finally, N spoke again.

 

“If we’re not in the same group…” he started, hesitant, almost careful with his words, “do you still wanna meet up later? You said you wanted to talk.”

 

There was something in his voice—uncertainty, maybe, or worry. The kind of nervous vulnerability that made Uzi’s chest tighten in a way she hated. Like he was afraid she might say no.

 

She looked at him, just briefly, and nodded. “Yeah. That sounds good.”

 

And after a moment, quieter, she added, “If we lose track of each other in there, just text me or something. We can meet up.”

 

N’s expression eased at that—just a little. His posture relaxed, and he gave a small, relieved nod. “I won’t forget,” he said with a soft smile.

 

Uzi looked away again, swallowing down the ache behind her throat. It was still hard. Still confusing. But at least she was trying—and it seemed so was he.

 

As the buzz of voices around them grew louder and the students began to shift, Uzi realized the crowd was moving again—had the field trip guide already finished speaking?

 

She blinked, her focus having drifted again, and cast a quick glance at N.

 

For a moment, she considered asking him what to do next. It would’ve been easy—natural, even. But something about the way his expression looked, the soft concern still lingering in his eyes, made her hesitate. She didn’t know if she could handle that right now.

 

Before she could overthink it, her eyes landed on Rebecca on the other side of her, seemingly like she was about to walk away.

 

It just felt like the easier option.

 

“Hey,” Uzi called over, stepping slightly toward her. “Do you know what we’re supposed to do now?”

 

Rebecca turned with a nod. “Yeah, we’re supposed to find one of the chaperones and give them our name. Then they’ll tell us what group we’re in.”

 

Uzi gave her a small nod of thanks. “Got it. Thanks.”

 

But as she turned her head, she caught movement from the side—N. He was still standing near her, but his gaze had shifted downward, lips pressed into a thin line. His brows drew together faintly, and for a moment he looked like he’d been stung. Not angry… just quietly hurt.

 

And Uzi knew why.

 

She hadn’t meant to make it obvious—but choosing to ask Rebecca instead of him… of course he noticed. He wasn’t oblivious. She felt her stomach twist a little. It hadn’t even necessarily been about him—it was just… easier for her. But to N, maybe it felt like distance. Like she was intentionally pulling away.

 

Uzi looked away, jaw tightening. She stayed rooted for just a second longer than she needed to. N didn’t move either.

 

The silence between them hung heavy, expectant—like it was begging her to say something. But her chest felt tight, her throat too closed off to let the right words form. What could she even say? ‘Sorry I didn’t ask you instead’? ‘Sorry I feel weird around you today’? No. This wasn’t the time. Not now. 

 

So she did what felt safer. She turned away.

 

With quiet, deliberate steps, Uzi started walking after Rebecca and Darren, blending into the crowd before she could change her mind.

 

She didn’t look back—not once. She didn’t want to see the look on N’s face. She already knew what she’d find: confusion, maybe disappointment… or worse, that quiet sadness she could never seem to handle. And right now, she wasn’t ready to handle it. So instead, she let it sit behind her, unspoken.

 

Rebecca walked just a few steps ahead, chatting lightly with Darren about something that Uzi had no energy to register.

 

She wasn’t really present. Her mind still flickered back to N—his expression, his voice, how it faltered when she didn’t meet his eyes. Her stomach churned with the guilt of it all, but she swallowed it down.

 

Later. She’d deal with it later.

 

“Hey, Rebecca,” Uzi called out quietly, just loud enough to be heard over the murmur of voices.

 

Rebecca glanced over her shoulder. “Yeah? What’s up?”

 

Uzi caught up, slipping into stride just a little behind her. “I’m just gonna follow you. I have no idea where we’re even supposed to be going.”

 

Rebecca nodded, unfazed. “We’re just heading to the edge of the crowd. All the chaperones are over there.”

 

“Alright,” Uzi replied, her voice a little hollow, but steady enough.

 

She fell in behind them again, eyes mostly on the ground as they weaved through the throng of students. The world around her moved with the usual chaotic buzz, but she barely noticed. Her thoughts were too loud, drowning it all out.

 

As Uzi continued to follow, her eyes flicked down without meaning to—just for a second.

 

She noticed Rebecca’s hand was laced with Darren’s, their fingers comfortably entwined. Their arms brushed casually as they walked, like it was second nature to be that close.

 

Uzi had known they were dating, of course—it wasn’t news. But for some reason, seeing it now, in that quiet, intimate way, made her stomach twist a little.

 

It reminded her too much of the way things had been with N lately—how natural it felt to reach for his hand, how his shoulder had started to feel like a place she belonged.

 

She looked away quickly, suddenly uncomfortable with her own thoughts. No. She couldn’t think about that. She shouldn’t be thinking about that. She was supposed to be mad at him—wasn’t she?

 

He kept that whole thing from her. That other drone. That whole part of himself.

 

And maybe he didn’t do it to be cruel—maybe it wasn’t even intentional—but it still made her feel... replaceable.

 

Even so, as she walked, Uzi could feel her thoughts unraveling and reforming in loops, replaying that one thought over and over again.

 

She was replaceable. He never cared about her.

 

She just reminded him of someone else.

 

That’s all she was to him. A replacement.

 

But… quiet part of her—the one she didn’t want to listen to—kept whispering that she was jumping to conclusions. That she was running from him before he had a chance to explain. That pushing him away now wouldn’t protect her from pain later—it would just guarantee it.

 

But she couldn’t stop herself.

 

The walls in her mind were already going up, reinforced by every worst-case scenario she  could invent. She didn’t want to push N away—of course she didn’t. She just didn’t know how not to.

 

If she let herself get too close again, and he really had been thinking about someone else all along, it would hurt more than she could handle. So she pushed. Not out of anger. Out of fear.

 

And that fear was spreading fast.

 

Her expression tightened slightly as her hands curled into her jacket pockets. She wasn’t looking at Rebecca and Darren anymore. She couldn’t. Every second she did, the quiet ache in her chest only grew sharper, more complicated.

 

She hated feeling this way. But right now, she didn’t know how to stop.

 

She was about to stress further when she almost ran into Rebecca and Darren—they had come to a stop. Uzi looked up, and noticed that they now stood in front of a chaperone with a clipboard in hand.

 

Her posture was stiff and efficient—clearly not one for small talk. The woman flipped through the pages briskly, eyes scanning names as she rattled off group assignments with the same practiced, almost mechanical cadence most of the staff had been using since the trip started.

 

Uzi wasn’t listening. After only a brief moment of awareness, when she had stopped walking, she started zoning out again. This time, though, her thoughts weren’t revolving around N.

 

Her mind now focused on all the possibilities of who she’d get grouped with. She stared blankly past the woman, her mind spinning with silent what-ifs and unwanted projections.

 

Was she about to be thrown in with two complete strangers? Would that be better than being stuck with someone she knew —even if she was with a friend, she wasn’t exactly in the mood to talk right now. And even worse… what if her and J were partners?

 

Uzi noticed Rebecca and Darren suddenly exchanged a small, wordless wave before walking off in opposite directions. Both of them seemed relatively content, but Uzi could see the bit of disappointment lacing their expressions.

 

Even couples weren’t safe from this mess of random pairings. Not that she thought they wouldn’t be—logically it only made sense that no exceptions would be made. But, still, it just added to her anxiety.

 

Then the clipboard turned toward her.

 

She felt her stomach sink slightly.

 

The chaperone gave her a flat look, her tone sharp and impatient as she asked, “Name?”

 

Uzi blinked, momentarily caught off guard by the bluntness of it. The woman was a far cry from the one who’d done room assignments yesterday—no warmth, no fake smile, just straight business.

 

Uzi’s first instinct was to bite back with something sarcastic, something like wow, cheerful much?  But she didn’t have the energy. Not today.

 

So instead, she just muttered,”Uzi Doorman.” She released a quiet sigh, keeping her hands deep in her pockets and her gaze slightly averted.

 

The woman’s pen hovered over the page, ready to drop her into whatever unlucky trio her name was attached to.

 

Uzi swallowed dryly, bracing herself—not out of curiosity, but out of reluctant dread.

 

The chaperone scanned the list for a beat longer than usual, flipping a page with an audible flick before she finally spoke again.

 

"Let’s see... you’re with a... Doll..." She paused, squinting at the page like it was written in some ancient, arcane dialect. “I’m not even gonna try  to pronounce her last name,” she muttered flatly. Then, without missing a beat, she added, “And a Sam Seymour.”

 

Uzi froze. Her stomach knotted the moment she heard that name.

 

Sam.

 

Oh, no. No no no. Of all drones.

 

She almost winced out loud. She knew Sam—he was at the top of her personal list of drones she’d rather launch into orbit. He was the guy who gave N a weed brownie during Lizzy’s party… she didn’t even want to recall that night. This was the worst possible timing for that.

 

Did the universe really hate her that much? What did she do to deserve this much suffering?!

 

And Doll… Uzi blinked, trying to mentally sift through the list of acquaintances in her memory. The name was familiar, just not face-clear. Then it clicked.

 

Oh—right. That one quiet girl. The one who never really talked unless absolutely necessary, and when she did, it was entirely in Russian.

 

Uzi didn’t have much to go off of with her—they interacted what, once? When V had introduced them to each other the time she forced Uzi to sit at her table?

 

She couldn’t recall a single time after that she had talked to Doll. But honestly? Uzi already preferred her ten times over Sam. At least Doll wasn’t going to make her want to drill a hole in her own head just by being around her.

 

She muttered a low, reluctant, “Thanks,” to the chaperone, though it was mostly out of habit. The woman didn’t even acknowledge it, already shifting her attention to the next student with the same sharp-edged disinterest.

 

Uzi scowled to herself as she turned and walked away, arms crossed tightly, muttering under her breath, “What a bitch…”

 

As she pushed past another knot of students, her thoughts swirled between frustration and resignation. Great. She had to spend the entire museum tour babysitting Sam and playing charades with Doll. This was shaping up to be the worst day of the trip yet… and wasn’t it was only the first?!

 

She refused to dwell on that thought. Instead, Uzi pushed through the dense crowd, eyes darting across the sea of students and chaperones, hoping to catch even a glimpse of either Doll or Sam.

 

The longer she searched, the heavier her frustration settled. She already wasn’t in the mood for this—mentally drained from everything with N, emotionally exhausted from just thinking, and now physically weaving through what felt like an endless wall of oblivious drones bumping into her without so much as a glance.

 

After a minute or two of aimless wandering, she sighed, rubbing her temples with both hands. This was going nowhere.

 

She considered texting someone—maybe V. She was pretty sure she had her number, and V was friends with Doll, right? Maybe she’d—

 

A light tap on her shoulder pulled her out of her thoughts.

 

Uzi stiffened instantly, her first instinct flaring with dread. Please don’t be N. Please don’t be N—

 

But when she turned, she found herself staring into a pair of striking orange eyes and a blank, unreadable expression.

 

Doll.

 

…Uzi?” She said quietly and blinked, her tone almost like a question. Her accent was thick, the syllables drawn out slightly, as if Uzi’s name was foreign to her tongue.

 

Uzi gave a stiff nod, momentarily thrown off by how calm—and, frankly, intense—Doll’s expression was. “Uh… do you know where Sam is?” she asked, trying not to sound like she was hoping Doll did not know. Which she was.

 

There was no verbal reply.

 

Instead, Doll turned away and curtly said,”Иди сюда.” She waved her hand slightly—more like a command than a casual gesture—and Uzi watched with mild disbelief as someone shuffled into view behind her.

 

Sam.

 

Of course.

 

He approached with that same detached swagger he always had, hands tucked into his oversized patchworked hoodie pockets, shoulders loose, eyes half-lidded like he was in some far off universe. He didn’t say anything at first, just gave Uzi a lazy once-over like he didn’t even realize who she was yet.

 

Uzi’s stomach twisted with dread. Great. Just great.

 

At least Doll seemed competent. That was something. Probably.

 

What an amazing start to the first stop of this god-awful trip.

Notes:

I would’ve made this chapter a bit longer but icl, I don’t really have the time 💔

I didn’t realize how long it actually was though until I started editing it. Don’t think that’s a bad thing, though.

I feel so bad for N 🥲 I was trying to think of it from his perspective and it’s like, Uzi had been super touchy and close with him *literally* just the day before- and then the following morning, right now in the story, she’s being super weird and distant for no apparent reason?! Like what 😭

In other news, I was debating for a while who to put Uzi in a group with. I wasn’t js gonna be predictable and be like “oh she gets in a group with N coincidentally and now they can talk and settle things” cuz no 🙄 that’s so lame

So now she’s in a group with Doll (YAY I love her sm I’m so glad I can *finally* have her be more in the story at this point) and Sam 😒

Next chapter will be posted Tuesday. I don’t have time to edit the double spacing so I’ll do that tomorrow- sorry abt that 😭💔

Byeee <33

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 82: Фу!

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

As Sam approached, Uzi caught the exact moment he recognized her—if recognized was even the right word. He gave a lazy wave, fingers barely lifting from his hoodie pocket, and greeted her with a drawled, “Yo.”

 

Uzi lifted her hand in return, a stiff, reluctant motion that barely counted as a wave. Just seeing Sam was enough to already sour her mood further. He had that same half-dazed look he always wore, like he wasn’t quite all there, and as he came to a stop beside her, he squinted at her like she was part of a blurry painting he couldn’t quite place.

 

She opened her mouth, ready to reintroduce herself if she had to—but Sam raised a hand to stop her. “Wait, don’t tell me,” he muttered, brows furrowing. “I know it. I know it… I’m just… hold on.”

 

Uzi stared, deadpan, lips drawing into a flat, unimpressed line.

 

He looked like he was genuinely thinking hard, eyes narrowed at nothing in particular, until—suddenly—his face lit up in triumph. “Jacuzzi, right?”

 

Uzi didn’t even blink. “It’s Uzi.”

 

“Ohhh,” Sam said slowly, the syllable stretching like his brain needed a moment to download the update. “Right. Uzi.”

 

She could see the faint pink tinge to his eyes. She didn’t even want to think about what he had gotten into this time. He was definitely not sober.

 

Great. Exactly the kind of drone she wanted to spend her museum trip with.

 

There was an awkward beat of silence where Uzi debated internally whether or not to just bash her head into a wall and end the misery early.

 

Eventually, she sighed and asked flatly, “So… what are we supposed to do now?”

 

She didn’t get an answer—not from Sam, at least.

 

Right on cue, a voice rang out above the crowd. It was the main field trip guide again, loud enough that the collective chatter dulled almost instantly. “Alright, I hope everyone’s found their assigned groups by now—”

 

Uzi’s attention shifted toward the sound, but her mood remained grim. Standing here next to the world’s most random duo, she already felt like the universe was playing some elaborate joke on her.

 

The field trip guide’s voice continued overhead, firm and rehearsed. “There will be a main tour lead by a museum staff member once everyone had entered—but, knowing how you teenagers are…” he trailed off momentarily, like he hadn’t meant to say that out loud, “We’ve decided to give everyone the option to separate from the main tour! Just be sure to return to the lobby at 12:30 sharp—“ he then held up his index finger, pointing at the crowd,”And remember everybody, be sure to take notes, and—“

 

Uzi tuned out completely at the last part, already rolling her eyes before the sentence even finished.

 

Notes. Sure. She’ll probably just take a photo of the information boards by exhibits that she likes. That should help with whatever assignment they had to do, right? Writing some sort of essay? She didn’t have the energy to think further than that.

 

But still, the one part he said—about how they had the freedom to branch off—ignited a flicker of hope in her chest.

 

That meant she could meet up with N. Privately. No worry it about field trip chaperones nearby, no crowd, no J. Just the two of them.

 

She’d have to figure out when exactly to text him, when they could slip away… but the opportunity was there, and that was enough for now.

 

Around her, the crowd started shifting again as all the students began funneling toward the museum entrance. Uzi still couldn’t get a good view of the building from her place in the group; too many tall heads in the way.

 

She turned slightly toward Doll, glancing over her shoulder. “Hey,” Uzi asked, her voice low but direct. “You care if we stick with the tour or not?”

 

She shrugged without looking at her, “Честно говоря, мне все равно.” she murmured.

 

Uzi couldn’t understand, but the tone was casual, almost dismissive. It wasn’t a no, or at least it didn’t seem to be. She took that as indifference.

 

Sam, trailing behind like a half-asleep shadow, added lazily, “Don’t care either. I’d rather not be around a crowd. Too loud. Too many drones breathing.”

 

Uzi shot him a side-glance, jaw tight. Didn’t ask you,  she thought bitterly, but forced herself not to say it. Not worth wasting the energy. She had more important things to focus on.

 

Like how the hell she was going to handle talking to N.

 

As they finally broke through the bottleneck of students funneling forward, Uzi stepped out from the dense crowd and into clearer air, just a short walk away from where the bus had been idling. The noise quieted around her for a moment, and she finally caught a proper look at the museum they’d been headed toward.

 

It was… definitely trying to impress.

 

The first thing that caught her eye was the towering bronze statue stationed just outside the entrance—an imposing drone atop a rearing horse, cast in metal with exaggerated heroism. One of the man’s hands clenched a flagpole, its banner arcing dramatically behind him in a wind that no longer blew. The other hand gripped the reins of the horse with theatrical intensity. Uzi had no idea who the figure was supposed to be—some glorified historical war hero, probably—but she didn’t exactly care. It was the kind of monument that screamed importance,  even if it said nothing of substance.

 

Beyond the statue, the actual façade of the museum loomed ahead.

 

It was made from a pale, marbled stone, aged slightly by weather but still pristine in a way that suggested weekly cleanings and probably too much funding. Broad columns flanked the entryway, reaching up to an elaborate pediment etched with scenes of old battles, industry, and what looked like ancient government drones holding scrolls. A little too on the nose, in Uzi’s opinion.

 

Directly above the glass-paneled entrance, the name of the building was stamped into the stone in oversized, all-caps block letters: NEW ORE HISTORY MUSEUM.  The kind of font that screamed institutional and unfun.

 

The field trip group slowed as it reached the stairs leading up to the doors, each step wide and shallow, polished smooth from decades of student groups and half-interested visitors.

 

Uzi followed the flow with her hands stuffed in her jacket pockets, her shoulders slightly hunched forward. The sun hit her face as they crossed into the shadow of the building, and she glanced up at the towering doors ahead, exhaling quietly through her nose.

 

She didn’t know if she was dreading the museum itself, or what the day was going to bring.

 

Maybe both.

 

The moment Uzi stepped through the tall glass doors, a sharp gust of conditioned air greeted her, slipping beneath her jacket and curling cold fingers around the base of her neck. She flinched slightly, a chill racing down her spine as she instinctively crossed her arms tighter over her chest. Even with a few drones ahead of her, the sudden temperature change hit hard—like the museum had intentionally set it to frigid historical authenticity.

 

She didn’t even care to absorb the scene inside. She was too focused on how she was already shivering from the cold, and how she was hyper aware about not only the other drones around her, but the fact that Sam was walking right behind her, close enough that he might accidentally step on her shoe.

 

As the rest of the students filtered in, the group began to splinter naturally. Clusters of three peeled off in all directions—some bolting toward distant hallways like it was a race, their laughter echoing through the open space. A chaperone called out after them, voice sharp with authority, but predictably, no one listened.

 

Most of the others started trailing behind the main field trip guide, who had already begun to converse with a museum employee approaching from the side—a taller drone in a navy-colored uniform, likely the tour guide. Their conversation looked scripted, dry, and already boring. Uzi didn’t hesitate to ignore them.

 

She pivoted toward her assigned group instead—Doll at her left, standing stiffly and unbothered, and Sam, who was leaning half off his axis like he’d rather be asleep somewhere.

 

“So,” Uzi said flatly, glancing between them, “any idea what we should do now?”

 

Doll responded without missing a beat,”Мы должны получить брошюру о музее, так как в ней будет карта.” her voice sharp and clipped as she said spoke. Her tone, though, sounded casual in a way... but Uzi still had no clue what the hell she said.

 

Before Uzi could say anything in response, she felt Sam shift closer—uncomfortably so.

 

He leaned slightly into her space, cupped one hand near his mouth like he was about to share state secrets, and whispered, “You think she actually understands us?”

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed, and she gave him a withering side glance. She didn’t bother turning her head fully toward him—she really didn’t want to. His proximity was irritating enough, and she could smell the synthetic scent of fruit-flavored smoke that clung to his breath like static.

 

She muttered, voice dry as sandpaper, “Probably.”

 

Sam hummed in vague amusement and leaned back, not phased in the slightest.

 

Uzi just exhaled slowly through her nose, resisting the growing urge to roll her eyes again. She was already over this group dynamic—and it had barely even started.

 

She couldn’t believe she was going to be stuck with a wannabe stoner and someone who she didn’t verbally understand for the next two hours…

 

Doll exhaled through her nose, her expression unchanging—flat and vaguely tired—as she pulled her phone from her pocket with a practiced flick.

 

Uzi blinked, puzzled at first, watching as Doll tapped a few times with a quick precision, before lifting the screen up in front of them.

 

Or rather, in front of Sam.

 

Displayed in bold text, courtesy of a Russian-to-English translator app, were the words:


"I can understand you, idiot."

 

Uzi barely had time to register what she was reading before Sam leaned back slightly, eyes widening with mock offense. He raised both hands defensively, a lopsided grin already tugging at the corner of his mouth.


“Sheesh,” he muttered, tone exaggeratedly wounded, “bit harsh. Didn’t know we were name-calling.”

 

Doll didn’t so much as blink at his reaction. Her deadpan remained as frozen as ever—unimpressed, unimpressed, and still unimpressed. She gave no verbal response, only returning her gaze to her phone and quickly typing something else. Her thumbs moved fast, then she turned the screen again toward the both of them.

 

This time it read:


"I said we should get a pamphlet. It’ll probably have the museum map."

 

“Ohh,” Uzi said quietly, finally understanding what Doll had meant earlier. She nodded once, the pieces fitting together now. At least that mystery was solved.

 

More importantly, she now knew for certain that Doll could understand everything just fine—she just didn’t know how to speak English much, or if she did, maybe she didn’t like to.

 

Either way, it was a relief to have that confirmed. It made the idea of being stuck with her for the next couple hours just a bit less anxiety-inducing…

 

Her thoughts remained slightly tangled, though—mild relief at Doll’s competence battling with lingering irritation at Sam’s very existence. She crossed her arms again, mentally preparing for a long morning.

 

After a moment, as Uzi’s gaze drifted away from the translator on Doll’s phone screen, she finally took in the full view of the museum’s entrance hall—and she paused, just for a second.

 

The lobby wasn’t just big—it was monumental, the kind of place designed to make you feel small the second you stepped inside.

 

The floor beneath her boots was made of polished tile, each step echoing faintly when she walked. Etched into the center of the lobby was a massive compass rose, its metallic inlay catching the overhead lights in just the right way to shimmer faintly. It stretched out like a sunburst, elegant and imposing, with gilded cardinal directions that seemed to point into every far-off corner of the past.

 

Above her, suspended from the vaulted ceiling on near-invisible wires, were several aircraft—real ones, she was almost sure. Their worn, dented hulls and faded paint jobs made it obvious they weren’t replicas. Some had the sharp, angular build of warplanes—sleek silhouettes of violence, history frozen mid-flight. One of them still bore markings she couldn’t read, the paint chipped like scars. The display was dynamic, like the planes were frozen in a dogfight just overhead, propellers still and wings spread wide.

 

The ceiling itself was built like a dome, adorned with faint murals of old sky charts—stars, swirling clouds, constellations she didn’t recognize. Massive banners hung from the far walls, detailing different eras: The  Industrial Revolution, The Age of Flight, War & Innovation. A large antique clock ticked near the top of the far archway, its second hand moving with precise clicks that somehow felt too loud.

 

Set against all of this, small exhibit pieces lined the periphery of the lobby: antique radios under glass, pieces of military gear arranged on pedestals, and faded photographs framed in backlit panels. Everything had this polished, reverent energy—like it had been preserved with obsession.

 

Uzi blinked, just once, and reluctantly admitted to herself that it was kind of cool.

 

Still, she wasn’t here to be impressed. She had other things on her mind—mainly getting through the day and again, figuring out when where and how she could pull N aside.

 

Her attention shifted again after that thought—and that’s when she finally spotted it.

 

Near the far left of the lobby, nestled beside a glossy reception desk staffed by a distracted-looking drone with a name tag, was a tall silver stand. At the top, a bold placard read: “MUSEUM INFORMATION” in clean lettering. 

 

A large map was displayed behind a pane of glass, showing a breakdown of each exhibit hall and section. Flanking the base were angled shelves filled with folded pamphlets, neatly fanned out, likely containing the same map and descriptions in portable form.

 

“There,” Uzi said, pointing toward it with a flick of her hand. “Pamphlets. Probably has the map inside.”

 

Doll looked up from her phone and gave a curt nod, her eyes following the direction of Uzi’s hand without a word.

 

“Cool,” Sam muttered from beside her, tone as flat and lazy as ever. He didn’t sound particularly interested—but then again, Uzi doubted anything short of a nap on a bench could excite him.

 

Without another word, the three of them began walking, Uzi leading the way. Her boots echoed softly on the tiles as they crossed the lobby floor, the shadow of a plane above them casting a slanted silhouette across their path. And though she still felt the weight of her spiraling thoughts, for a brief moment, the sheer scale of the room made them feel… just a little bit quieter.

 

Once they made it to the display, Uzi tugged one of the glossy pamphlets free from a holder, unfolding it quickly with a faint crackle of paper.

 

Inside, a sprawling map stared back at her—overwhelming and color-coded, dotted with symbols and numbers that clearly meant something, though she had no idea what. It looked more like a map to an amusement park than a typical history museum. Lines twisted around corners, arrows pointed in six directions at once, and a legend in the corner tried—but failed—to make any of it clearer.

 

Seriously? Did this place have to be massive? Who decided dragging a bunch of barely-interested teenagers into a building this size was a good idea?

 

Uzi blinked hard, scanning over names of exhibits she barely processed. Something about technological eras, something else about post-war propaganda. A whole section labeled The Evolution of Modern Industry made her want to shut the pamphlet on sight.

 

She sighed through her nose and glanced up, not sure what to say—so instead, she just defaulted to the obvious, “Where do you guys wanna go first?” she muttered, her voice a little flat.

 

Doll didn’t answer. She was still examining her pamphlet, unbothered, eyes flicking lazily across the graphics it contained.

 

Sam, on the other hand, was holding the map he’d grabbed like it was a cryptic artifact. He brought it closer to his face, narrowing his eyes, squinting as if it might magically rearrange itself into something easier to read.

 

His brow furrowed in exaggerated concentration… then, just like that, his expression brightened. A slow grin spread across his face—lazy but satisfied, like someone who finally cracked a code that didn’t matter.

 

“There’s an exhibit about the ‘70s in New Ore City,” he said, flicking his fingers against the paper. “Looks kinda sick.”

 

He turned his head toward Uzi and raised his eyebrows slightly, as if waiting for her reaction, but his usual detached tone made it impossible to tell if he was being serious or just didn’t care about any other option.

 

Uzi’s eyes scanned the map again until she spotted the exhibit Sam was talking about— “Decade Archive: The 1970s—New Ore City’s Culture & Cult Crisis.”

 

Uzi blinked.

 

Ah. So that’s what he conveniently left out.

 

Her expression fell flat. Of course Sam would be into something like that—half-baked philosophies, ‘prophetic’ delusional drones with blind followings, and hallucinogenic mushrooms. If he’d been alive during the actual 70s, he probably would’ve joined one of those desert communes and tried to start a band with three chords and no talent…

 

She wasn’t trying to be judgmental to an extent—that era didn’t necessarily seem like a terrible time to be around, and she had to admit that the fashion was pretty cool. If it was anyone else, she wouldn’t have had a second thought. But it was just the fact that Sam seemed interested, and how perfectly he fit into that stereotype that bugged her.

 

She muttered,”Of course…” under her breath, unable to stop the comment from slipping out.

 

Unfortunately, Sam caught it.

 

“What?” he asked, cocking his head to the side in lazy curiosity, like he knew full well she was talking about him but wanted her to say it anyway.

 

Uzi didn’t even dignify him with a real explanation. She just gave him a tired look and said dryly, “Nothing.”

 

Sam grinned like he’d won something.

 

Before he could say more, Doll spoke up,”Мы можем просто гулять, пока не найдем что-нибудь интересное.” Her tone was clipped and direct.

 

Uzi’s eyebrows drew together slightly in confusion, and she glanced at her, unsure what Doll was trying to say. She would’ve thought by now that Doll figured out Uzi couldn’t understand. It was either that she didn’t notice, or she just simply didn’t care whether Uzi did or not. At this point, it seemed like the latter.

 

When Doll recognized the blank look on Uzi’s face, she wordlessly raised a hand and pointed down the wide corridor ahead of them.

 

The hallway was broad, dimly lit with soft lights and ceiling windows, and had multiple paths branching off deeper into the museum—some labeled with tall overhead signs, others simply disappearing into quiet exhibits.

 

Uzi blinked and looked back at Doll. “So… are you saying we should just look?”

 

Doll nodded once, firmly. It seemed that was her plan.

 

Uzi gave a small shrug in response. That was fine. Wandering aimlessly was still better than standing around with nothing to do—and at least now they were moving.

 

She folded her map back up, tucking it into the pocket of her jacket, and quietly fell into step beside the others as they moved toward the hallway.

 

Her arms crossed loosely, eyes flicking over the dim museum signage, but her thoughts remained half-fixed on the map, half on N—still somewhere else in the building. She tried to ignore that part for now. This was her group. This was what she was stuck with.

 

As they walked further into the maze of museum corridors, Uzi found herself dragging a few steps behind Sam and Doll.

 

Her boots made faint echoes on the tiled floor, but her mind wasn’t focused on the path or the exhibits—just floating in a murky fog of unrelated thoughts. That is, until her phone vibrated against her thigh with a quiet buzz. 

 

She blinked, snapped out of her trance, and reached into her pocket. Her screen lit up with a familiar name.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ : 2 Unread Messages (1m ago)

 

Her stomach dropped.

 

Seriously? Already?

 

He had said he’d text her later. It hadn’t even been that long… What could he possibly have said this soon?

 

Her thumb hovered over the notification like it was radioactive. A part of her desperately wanted to know what the message said—maybe he just wanted to check in. Maybe it was nothing big. Maybe it was big. Maybe he was saying something sweet. Or apologizing for whatever reason. Or worse.

 

Her grip on the phone tightened, and she briefly considered chucking it into the nearest trash can. Get a grip, she told herself. She could open it now, sure, but… did she want to?

 

No. Not yet.

 

She’d pretend she actually cared about where she was for just a few more minutes. She’d process. She’d breathe. She wasn’t stalling. She was being rational. Responsible, even.

 

...Okay, she was absolutely stalling.

 

With a small, frustrated breath through her nose, Uzi shoved her phone back into her pocket and picked up her pace to catch up with the others.

 

Sam was rambling ahead of them—something about being hungry and wondering if museum food was edible, maybe even philosophizing about vending machines.

 

Uzi tuned him out instantly.

 

She then noticed Doll, walking beside him, looking entirely unimpressed. Her shoulders were stiff, her face unreadable, but there was an unmistakable tightness in her brow that said she was already regretting every second of putting up with this.

 

That, oddly enough, made Uzi feel a little better.

 

It wasn’t like her and Doll were necessarily friends now, but at least they shared the mutual experience of being stuck with Sam. It was strange sort of camaraderie, even if neither of them acknowledged it.

 

Uzi’s tension eased slightly. Maybe this group won’t be that bad, she thought, eyes flicking from Doll’s neutral expression to Sam’s increasingly dramatic gesturing. At least she’s not the only one annoyed.

Notes:

When I was writing Doll’s dialogue, I js wanted to make it straight up Russian, like with no translation by it or anything. But the thing is, I don’t know a lick of Russian 💔 but I didn’t want to make it js straight from google translate 😭 so I used like, 4 different translators to try to get it as accurate as possible. I put the sentences in each translator and translated it a few times until it made sense, and meant for the most part the same thing in all the different translator. It was kinda annoying though cuz literally if there was one single letter or word off, it would change the entire sentence 💔 like in one of them, it kept replacing “we” with “he” or “him,” which made no sense with that I was trying to get it to say 😭 I *think* I figured it out though cuz I got it to mean the same thing in all the different translators I used, so hopefully it’s grammatically correct in actual Russian too

Okay enough abt that - I really like this chapter, but obviously not a lot really happened. I thought it was super fun writing the descriptions of the museum though, I love writing descriptions of places cuz like, I imagine them in my head of what I want it to look like, and I love how writing can convey exactly what I want it to so whoever’s reading can (hopefully) imagine it too. I really don’t like when like, someone’s tryna describe a room and it’s js like “the floor was wood, there was a bed and a nightstand and a table. A carpet was next to the bed.” Cuz like, I can imagine that if, but then where is it exactly? What color is it? How far is it from where the character is standing. You can achieve exactly what u want by js changing the wording 😭 like this,”When she walked into the room, she took a moment to absorb the scene. To the right against the wall was a bed, or more like a mattress, on the floor. The sheets were haphazardly spayed across its frame, fluffy and green in color. The pillowed matched, but they were adorned with a pattern of leaves. Beside the bed to its left was a nightstand, made of cheap-looking dark wood. Its sides were chipped, and there were noticeable nail polish stains atop it, as well as a small lamp and a black alarm clock, red numbers flashing. On the floor beside the bed, also to the right a bit in front of the nightstand was a fluffy white carpet, its synthetic fur glinting against the beams of sunlight peaking through the window. Below the carpet, the floor was polished wood, the color lighter than that of the nightstand…” then it’d go on to describe other shit in the room idfk. Also I could’ve written that way better probably but I don’t feel like it

Okay I’m done like that was the most random thing to rant abt ever 😭😭 idk im js in a really writing kinda mood rn.

Anyways, the next chapter is gonna be a bit shorter than this one. But that’s cuz the chapter after the next one is gonna be really long and detailed cuz stuff is gonna happen… not gonna say anymore than that 😣

Next chapter will be posted Thursday!! And OH MY GODDD I’m so so SO excited for the shit that’s gonna happen in this story soon. Idk if this is embarrassing or not but idgaf, but I like think abt all the time all the stuff I want to happen in detail, like it’s a day dreaming kinda thing. I daydream way too much, and like a lot of times it’s abt things I’m writing or like ideas for stories or artwork I wanna do. I’m really trying to get back into drawing cuz it’s been so fucking long, but like that’s irrelevant 💔 I’ve been thinking a lot abt a series I wanna make cuz I literally have such a good, original premise for it (no way am I saying it cuz I’m not having someone else steal it 😒) and then one day I wanna animate it and stuff like omg that’d be so fun and I’ve always wanted to make an indie animation kinda thing. Might be a year or two before I can accomplish that but like, u gotta start somewhere right 😭

OKAY ANYWAYS IM SORRY FOR RAMBLING UGH I NEED TO STOP 😭 I js don’t really write my thoughts down anywhere else so might as well do it here. I can’t wait to finish this story cuz when I do, I’m gonna reread everything and maybe edit some stuff, but it’ll be fun to read what my mindset or thoughts were at the end of each chapter. But who knows when I’m gonna finish it it’s been like 6 months 💔 also that’s crazy, I never thought it was gonna go on for this long. But I’m having fun so idgaf

OKAY WAIT IM RAMBLING AGAIN wait WAIT one more thing I promise. Also this is kinda important. Remember when I said I was gonna make a discord server and then like, never brought it up again? I’ve js been really busy with shit so I haven’t worked on it ig, and I like never check discord either 💔 BUT in abt a month I shouldn’t be as busy with stuff so I can finally start working on it again!! I can’t wait- I’ll probably say a bit more abt it in my next authors notes I’m running out of characters here

OKAY THATS IT again next chapter will be posted Thursday. BYE!

Chapter 83: Colosseum

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The past stretch of time had passed in a haze, the kind where Uzi barely registered anything unless she forced herself to.

 

She, Doll, and Sam had meandered through several wings of the museum by now, each hall branching into another piece of the past—which always managed to be connected back to New Ore City somehow.

 

The first exhibit they wandered through had been about the wildlife once native to the surrounding terrain. The floor was set with painted artificial grass, and fake trees lined the walls like props on a stage. Taxidermied creatures stood mid-motion—predatory mammals frozen in snarls, wide-eyed prey caught in plastic stillness, birds perched on simulated branches. Uzi had paused briefly at a reconstructed wetland scene, her gaze brushing over a massive heron, its wings outstretched above a waxy-looking pond.

 

Then there was the fossil exhibit—it wasn’t huge, most likely considering the fact that this wasn’t a natural history museum, but impressive nonetheless. Fragments of bones suspended in glass, ancient jawlines of long-extinct creatures, along with maps showing the dig sites around the city. The museum had even made dramatic attempts at lighting—soft underglow from beneath the skeletons, dramatic spotlights—but the room had felt cold and hollow to her.

 

The war exhibit was harder to ignore. A dim room lined with walls of rust-colored metal, uniforms of drones from some long- forgotten regional war stood upright behind glass. Uzi slowed briefly to glance at a display case containing dented helmets, faded armbands, and oil-stained letters. A plaque labeled them: Relics from the Southside Uprising, 1876. She wondered briefly who those drones had been. Were they scared? Brave? Or just like anyone else—pulled into something bigger than them before they could question it?

 

The last place they passed was eerily quiet. Documents and files sealed behind layers of glass: pages of thin, yellowed paper written by the first drone settlers of New Ore City. The writing was shaky, old code and cursive mixed together. Fragments of maps, photographs from when the city had nothing but its name and a few steel beams. It was supposed to feel reverent, she guessed. But honestly, she couldn’t have cared less.

 

She noted that there wasn’t a specific overarching theme to the exhibits, they were all generally anything related to history. But, she noticed that there was always a point that connected back to New Ore City, no matter how obscure the connection seemed. There seemed to be entire exhibits focused around a point of history that had nothing to do with the city—but an ancient relics from a foreign place was found there, so they had the excuse.

 

All of it was… interesting. In fact, she had to admit, a lot of the exhibits were pretty cool.

 

But Uzi couldn’t keep her head in the present, not really.

 

No matter how much she tried to focus on dusty letters or bones behind display glass, her thoughts kept snapping back to her pocket. To the weight of her phone. To that stupid, unread message from N.

 

She hadn’t opened it.

 

Every time she’d even think about it, her fingers would twitch—she’d nearly reached for it more than once, only to pull back like it had scorched her. Her logic kept repeating the same line: you just need more time.

 

Time to breathe. Time to figure out what she felt and how she could even put it into words. Time to stop imagining the worst possible thing he might’ve messaged.

 

But the longer she waited, the more the indecision twisted in her gut.

 

Of course she had to respond eventually. Of course she’d talk to him. She knew that. But somehow that knowledge didn’t make it easier. If anything, it made her hesitate more. Because the second she opened that message… things would be real. There’d be no turning back.

 

So she kept walking. She let her boots echo alongside the others. She let the past loom behind glass while her present remained unread in her pocket, gnawing at her like a weight she couldn’t shake.

 

Uzi’s footsteps slowed slightly as they neared the edge of the medieval wing—an exhibit lined with stone archways and old iron replicas of things drones hadn’t used in centuries. Shields, rusted weapons, faux torches bolted to the walls. She wasn’t paying attention to any of it. Her focus was entirely inward now.

 

Her hand, heavy with hesitation, dipped into her pocket. She curled her fingers around her phone and pulled it out like it weighed twice what it should have. Her thumb hovered over the screen—then, with one last breath she wasn’t sure she’d taken voluntarily, she unlocked it.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ : 2 Unread Messages (14m ago) 

 

She stared at the preview for a long moment, caught in the kind of silent mental debate that exhausted her more than anything else that day. But finally, she tapped the thread open.

 

The first message was simple, almost overly careful:

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [10:57 AM]: Could you meet me at the ancient history exhibit in about twenty minutes?

 

Then, a second one—shorter, more hesitant:

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [10:57 AM]: If you still want to, I mean.

 

Uzi just stood there.

 

Her thumb rested idle on the screen as she read them again. And again.

 

The second message got to her. Not because of what it said, exactly—but because of what it meant. The wording wasn’t just cautious. It was vulnerable. Uncertain. Like he was already preparing himself for rejection, trying not to get his hopes up. Like he expected  her not to want to see him anymore.

 

She frowned, guilt twisting in her chest. Of course he was worried. She hadn’t even said hi properly that morning. She’d avoided looking at him for too long, spoke in clipped sentences, and drifted away without warning.

 

It was like she was punishing him for something she hadn’t even had the guts to talk to him about yet—or more like, that’s exactly what it was.

 

And the worst part was—he didn’t even know what he’d done. He didn’t even know that he didn’t necessarily do anything… to an extent.

 

She wanted to fix things. Part of her ached for it. Ached for him. Even though it’d barely even been a few hours, she missed being close to him in a way that wasn’t just physical. She wanted to talk to him and be near him. She would’ve loved hearing him ramble about all the things he found interesting at the museum, even if she wasn’t interested in them herself…

 

Even now, thinking about him waiting near some random display, hoping she might show up, tugged at something deep in her.

 

Was that bad?

 

Was that unhealthy? Why did being away from him for this long bother her so much? It wasn’t like it had been days—heck, it hadn’t even been 2 hours, had it? Was it just because of the context? Would it feel like this under any other circumstance?

 

That thought made her scarily aware of the fear that had already rooted itself deep within her.

 

Her brain kept screaming at her to keep her distance. That getting closer would only mean letting her guard down. That letting her guard down meant making herself vulnerable. And being vulnerable meant giving someone the power to hurt her.

 

And she wasn’t sure she could survive being hurt like that.

 

Especially not from him. Not after they had gotten so close, closer than she’d ever been with anyone before.

 

Not when he had become the only drone in her life that made her feel safe just by standing next to her…

 

So she stood still, surrounded by images of a long-dead era, with the present burning in her hand.

 

Half of her wanted to go. Half of her wanted to run. And neither half knew how to make the other listen.

 

Uzi instinctively glanced down at the time on her phone again, looking at how long ago the message had been sent. At this point, it had been 16 minutes—wait, no, that couldn’t be right. That would mean she only had four minutes until she was supposed to meet him…

 

She had to double-check just to be sure. Her eyes flicked back at the time the message had been sent, to the current time on her phone, and back again.

 

Shit.

 

This meant N would be there soon… or maybe he was already waiting. She didn’t even know how far the exhibit even was.

 

Her thoughts began twisting again—if she didn’t leave right now,she’d be late. Or worse, she’d miss him entirely. And if she did miss him, what message would that send?

 

She had to go.

 

Her heart picked up pace—not from nerves about seeing N, necessarily, but from the urgency of needing to move. But first, she needed a believable excuse. Something quick. Something that wouldn’t prompt questions…

 

She looked left.

 

Sam was, as usual, still lost in his own world, talking endlessly about something she had stopped listening to five minutes ago. His arms moved as he talked, occasionally gesturing toward displays without really looking at them, like they were props for whatever chaotic monologue he was spinning.

 

Beside him, Doll had one earbud in, probably listening to music. Her arms were crossed, and her expression completely unreadable. She wasn’t even pretending to engage with Sam—just walking, straight-faced, occasionally blinking with that sort of detached patience reserved for someone enduring a long elevator ride.

 

Uzi blinked, a little amazed Sam hadn’t even noticed her earbud. Then again, that would’ve required self-awareness.

 

Still—perfect. Neither of them were paying much attention to her. She had her out.

 

Uzi cleared her throat and raised her voice slightly, just enough to be heard over Sam’s rambling and Doll’s music.

 

“Hey,” she said flatly, keeping her tone casual. “I’m gonna go to the bathroom real quick.”

 

Sam blinked—slow and sluggish like his brain was still booting up. Then came his voice, lazy as ever. “Wait—uh, you want me to come with you?”

 

Uzi stopped dead in her tracks, eyebrows twitching up in immediate confusion. She turned to look at him. “…What?”

 

Her tone wasn’t even aggressive, just flat with disbelief. Her mind was scrambling—not because she was flustered, but because she really hoped he wasn’t implying anything weird. She almost winced at the thought.

 

But Sam just shrugged casually, hands still jammed in his pockets. “I meant so you don’t get lost or whatever,” he said with that ever-present, crooked grin. He looked like he couldn’t decide whether he was amused or just too chilled out to care.

 

Uzi stared at him for a second. Her expression remained unreadable, lips pressed into a taut, flat line, but every neuron in her brain was lighting up with annoyance.

 

She bit back the sharp retort she wanted to throw and instead said evenly, “I’m good.”

 

She turned slightly—intending to leave it at that—when a flicker of movement caught her attention. She glanced toward Doll.

 

To her surprise, the other girl had removed one of her headphones and was now watching her. Not suspiciously… but not casually either. Her gaze was intense, a little too focused. Uzi almost flinched under it—not because she was afraid, but because it caught her so off guard. Doll’s eyes had that quiet kind of sharpness that made Uzi feel like she was being studied.

 

But after a beat, that edge faded. Doll’s shoulders relaxed ever so slightly, and her gaze softened—not into warmth, but something closer to neutrality, or at least that’s what Uzi assumed, “Вам не нужно врать.” She said, a strange underlying tone to her voice—but Uzi couldn’t pinpoint what that tone was.

 

Uzi decided to just assume she either said a what? or where are you going? She cleared her throat and repeated herself, this time speaking a little slower, just in case Doll hadn’t caught it earlier. 

 

“Bathroom,” she said, tone flat but not rude. “Just for a second.”

 

Doll blinked slowly at Uzi’s answer, her head tilting ever so slightly to the side. “Я знаю, что ты не собираешься туда,” whatever she said came out more clipped—blunt, even. Uzi couldn’t tell if she was irritated or if she just always sounded like that. There was something vaguely watchful to her voice, like she wasn’t quite buying the excuse… or maybe she just didn’t know how to respond.

 

Uzi offered a hesitant nod, unsure if that was the right thing to do. She couldn’t tell whether Doll was fine with her leaving or secretly judging her for ditching. Maybe even something else entirely.

 

Still, Uzi awkwardly thumbed over her shoulder, motioning to the general direction of anywhere-but-here. “I’ll be right back,” she added with a half-muttered edge, as casual as she could make it.

 

Doll just shrugged, unimpressed. She mumbled something under her breath—“Хорошо, тогда…” Uzi barely caught that, but definitely didn’t seem like a ‘see you later.’ Maybe it was a dismissal. Maybe something sarcastic. Either way, Doll didn’t stop her, and that was all that mattered right now.

 

Without another word, Uzi turned on her heel and walked away.

 

The second her back was to them, her face shifted—lips pressing into a tight, pale line as she exhaled a long, silent breath. She reached into her pocket and pulled out the wrinkled museum pamphlet, hastily unfolding it and scanning it like it held the key to survival.

 

Her eyes darted through the map, scanning the grid of color-coded zones and cramped labels, until finally—

 

There it was. Ancient History Exhibit.

 

Her stomach dropped.

 

It was practically on the other side of the building.

 

Of course it was.

 

She resisted the urge to groan, instead folding the map haphazardly and stuffing it back into her pocket. Her pace picked up, boots clacking a little more sharply on the polished tile floor as she walked past other students and random museum visitors. The museum’s high ceilings and open air gave everything a sense of distance and echo—like her thoughts had room to bounce around and grow louder.

 

And they were growing louder.

 

Her chest felt tight already—stress blooming like ink in water. Sticky. Clingy. Tar-like. She hated this feeling. This mix of dread and anticipation, like she was walking toward something inevitable and didn’t even know whether she wanted to face it or run in the opposite direction.

 

But she kept walking.

 

Because this was it.

 

-

 

After walking for what felt like hours—though in reality, it had probably only been a handful of minutes—Uzi finally caught sight of a sign mounted on the wall in elegant, serifed lettering: Ancient History Exhibit.

 

She stared at it for a second, unmoving, as if her legs had to catch up with the reality of being here. She’d made it. Her chest felt heavy with something she couldn’t quite name—anticipation, maybe, or dread disguised as resolve.

 

The space she was in now felt strangely empty, as if she’d reached a quiet pocket of the museum where even the echo of footsteps softened. The hallway was lined with modest display cases, scattered with artifacts—tools, ceramics, fragments of inscriptions—but she barely glanced at them.

 

Her eyes were drawn to the end of the corridor, where the hallway seemed to bend, disappearing behind a wide turn.

 

That had to be it. The actual exhibit.

 

And maybe… N.

 

Her boots clicked softly against the polished floor as she made her way down the corridor. The farther she walked, the slower her pace became—an almost unconscious hesitation weighing down her limbs. Her hands had balled into fists at her sides, and she only noticed when her fingers started to ache.

 

She rounded the corner—and then she saw him.

 

N stood just ahead, framed in the open space like the quiet centerpiece of the room.

 

His posture was tense, but not frozen—like he was trying to seem casual, but couldn’t stop fidgeting. His hands were buried in his pockets, shoulders slightly hunched. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, glanced around as if looking for someone—or trying not to look like he was waiting.

 

Then, after a moment, he pulled his hands out of his pockets and began anxiously picking at the edge of one thumb, then stopped abruptly, exhaled, and reached for his phone. That tiny, subtle motion—so familiar, so telling—made Uzi’s stomach twist.

 

He was nervous.

 

That somehow made it worse.

 

She took another step forward, her boots whispering over the floor, and now she could see more clearly—could feel the anxious energy rolling off him even from this distance.

 

Her gaze flicked briefly to the side as she passed by a large glass display case. It held a detailed model of what looked like a Roman Colosseum, tiny stone figures frozen mid-battle inside the miniature arena. But she couldn’t process it—couldn’t take in the history or the craftsmanship or whatever plaque explained it. It was just visual noise. Her thoughts were too loud.

 

Heart thudding like static, she raised one hand and gave the smallest wave, more out of habit than confidence. Just enough to say I’m here.

 

N looked up. His expression from this distance was unreadable. When he saw her, he lifted his hand in return, his wave a touch more hesitant than hers. Then, slowly, he started walking toward her.

 

And suddenly Uzi wasn’t sure how to breathe.

 

When they met in the center of the hallway, the ambient museum noise—the murmur of distant voices, the shuffle of footsteps echoing against marble walls—faded into the background for Uzi. Her attention locked solely on N. Now that he stood directly in front of her, she could read him far more clearly.

 

He was trying— really trying—to seem calm.

 

But he wasn’t.

 

His mouth was pulled tight in a faint, uneven line. His brows had the slightest pinch between them, subtle enough that most wouldn’t notice—but Uzi did. His eyes, too, betrayed him. They darted briefly toward hers and then away again, not in avoidance but in hesitation. Worry clung to him, quiet and simmering just beneath the surface, like he was bracing for something and didn’t want her to see it.

 

Uzi, now far more aware of the tension building in her own chest, instinctively took a tiny step back. The closeness had suddenly felt too much—too intimate, too exposed.

 

The silence stretched.

 

It wasn’t hostile. Just… uncomfortable. Like neither of them knew how to exist in this moment without saying something that might make it worse.

 

Finally, N’s voice broke through the quiet. “So…” he said gently, his tone carefully even. “What did you want to talk about…?”

 

His voice was calm. Measured. But there was something off about it. A strain, just beneath his words. He was controlling his voice the way someone would control their breathing before a crash—like he didn’t want to reveal too much.

 

Uzi felt a rush of heat rise in her face, her mouth dry. She opened it to speak, but nothing came out.

 

Come on, come on, she thought. Say something. Say anything.

 

She had rehearsed this a dozen times in her head… sort of. Not the words exactly, but the outline, the intent. Now it all seemed to vanish, scattered like leaves in the wind.

 

Her pulse hammered in her ears. What was she even supposed to lead with? This had to be said right, or it could go horribly wrong.

 

Then, like a whisper at the back of her mind, she remembered what V had said on the bus. Be direct. No overthinking. Just say it.

 

Thinking of V reminded her of the night before. When V had approached her and told her everything.

 

She could just… say it in the same way V did.

 

Uzi swallowed, bracing herself. Her voice was quiet, flat, and deliberate. “…J knows.”

 

The second the words left her, they hung in the air like a weight. Her shoulders tensed, eyes flicking up to meet N’s, unsure how he’d react—unsure what she would even do next.

Notes:

Bro - ao3 was down literally ALL DAY yesterday I was so pressed 😭

I had this chapter ready to post and everything - I checked ao3 around noon, right, and it was down 💔 so literally SEVEN FUCKING HOURS later I checked again, content and excited to post a chapter, and it was still down 😭💀

I was so devastated bruv 💔🥀

Well regardless I posted today so hope this is good enough 🥲

I *would* apologize for the major cliffhanger, but that was kinda the point 😈

When I was initially writing this I was gonna make it worse though, where she left Sam and Doll and then the chapter js ends when she goes to the ancient history exhibit or wtv tf. I didn’t like that though so then, I was gonna end it when Uzi js sees N in the hallway. But I felt like that was *still* a shitty way to end it so now it ended whenever they like, actually approached each other or wtv. I like this wayyyy more 😣

I *will* apologize though for this chapter being kinda short ig, and like not really much is happening. BUT I PROMISE ITLL BE WORTH IT I’m planning for the next chapter to be SUPER long cuz like… I’ll js say there’s gonna be a lot of stuff happening. Also it’ll be really dialogue heavy too. BUT not saying anymore than that, I’ll let u try to guess what’s gonna happen 😈

And also I’m gonna work my ass off to make it as good as I want it to be, or like how I have it envisioned in my head… but that means it’s gonna take me a bit longer to write it 🥲

I should post the next chapter on Tuesday at the latest. Again though I promise it’ll be worth the wait 😭 or at least I hope so 🙂‍↕️

I can’t wait to post it AHHH this is gonna be great 🤧 (maybe a bit dreadful though but still great 🫣)

And also *kinda* off topic but not at all, I don’t think Uzi becoming self aware abt her attachment issues is good at all 😭 poor girl 💔 and that mixed with behind shit at processing her emotions is *not* a good combination 💀 (love how I’m saying this as if I’m not the one literally writing this 💔) I wanna say hopefully it gets better soon but who knows with her 😒

Anyways enough abt that 😭🤚 That’s all I have to say I think- Byeee 😖

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 84: The Comfort of a Laugh Track

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

N’s eyes widened, blinking rapidly like the words hadn’t quite registered—like his mind had stalled trying to understand what Uzi had just said. It almost looked like he thought she was joking, or maybe that he’d misheard her entirely.

 

“Wait… what?” His voice cracked slightly with disbelief.

 

Uzi didn’t bother softening her expression. Her eyes narrowed, tone sharpening just a little—not out of anger, but out of growing frustration. She had already been hesitant to have this conversation in the first place. Even though she had been the one who brought it up. Now it felt like dragging a boulder uphill.

 

“She knows,” Uzi repeated, slower and firmer this time, emphasizing every syllable like she needed to force the information through his skull. “J knows that I know.” 

 

That seemed to land.

 

The shift in N’s face was immediate. The color metaphorically drained from him—his posture stiffened, and his arms tensed slightly at his sides. All the control he’d been holding onto cracked in an instant. The confusion melted away, replaced by wide-eyed panic.

 

“Wait—how?” His voice rushed out, layered with disbelief and anxiety. “How are you so sure? What—how would she even find out you knew? That doesn't—she wouldn’t—how—”

 

Uzi didn’t answer right away. Her gaze dropped, her hand absentmindedly tightening around the folded pamphlet in her pocket as she let out a quiet sigh through her nose.

 

She didn’t want to have to explain all this. She didn’t want to be the one who had to keep N grounded while her own thoughts were slipping through the cracks.

 

“V told me last night,” she muttered finally, voice low but edged with tiredness. She kept her eyes off him—because something about meeting his gaze right now would make everything feel too real, too sharp.

 

N flinched slightly. “V told you?” he echoed, more to himself than to her, his brows drawing together in alarm. “But… why would she—how would she even know for sure? I mean… J could’ve just been saying something weird, right? It might not mean anything. There’s no way she—she can’t know for sure. She wouldn’t—”

 

“She literally told V,” Uzi cut in, her voice flat but impatient now. She raised her head and locked eyes with him for the first time in several moments, her tone drier than before.

 

“Not hinted. Not maybe. Not ‘oh it’s probably nothing.’ J said— confidently —that she knows. Or at least that she’s certain enough.” 

 

Her words hit like a slap.

 

His expression twisted subtly—worry shifting into dread. He looked like he wanted to deny it again… but he couldn’t. Not after hearing that.

 

Uzi watched him carefully, her stomach twisting with something cold. She hated the way his face looked right now—like the world was caving in around him. But she also hated being the one who had to deliver  that collapse. Her chest tightened, and a thousand conflicting thoughts screamed in her head.

 

Why did I come here? Why did I say anything? Why does this hurt so much? 

 

But she already knew the answer to all of that. Because this mattered. Because he mattered.

 

And that—more than anything—terrified her.

 

After a long, drawn out moment, N’s head jerked up and he looked at her again—his brow furrowed, mouth parting again in uncertainty.

 

“Wait—” he said, almost cutting himself off, “what do you mean by… ‘certain enough’?” His voice was tight, almost hopeful in the way someone sounded when they were clinging to the thinnest thread. “So… she’s not completely sure, right? That means—”

 

Before he could finish, Uzi’s words came out like a blade. Her voice was sharp—not loud, but it cut clean through the space between them.

 

“She already saw us leave the party together,” she snapped, her eyes narrowing, tone rising just slightly. “She saw us leave the library together. She’s not stupid, N. She noticed the second you stopped bringing me up around her. And guess what? She already suspected us—this just confirmed it.” 

 

Uzi’s hands had clenched slightly at her sides, her chest rising and falling a bit faster than before. Her voice dropped in pitch—quiet now, but bitterly pointed.

 

“And now that she knows I know—or thinks she does? I’m a liability.”

 

That final word hung in the air like smoke.

 

She watched as N’s expression broke—like something inside him snapped loose. Any of his usual brightness remaining completely snuffed out, eyes widening a fraction as her words set in. His mouth opened like he wanted to say something, anything, but nothing came. He took an unconscious step toward her, as if drawn by instinct, his voice stammering and falling flat before it could form words.

 

He looked like he had just been sucker-punched and couldn’t catch his breath.

 

Then… silence.

 

His eyes drifted to the side, unfocused. His brows drew together—not in confusion, but deep thought, like his mind had started sprinting a mile a minute behind his still exterior. Uzi could practically see  the gears grinding—his gaze slightly vacant, lips parted, the tips of his fingers twitching with the start of another aborted gesture.

 

And then, suddenly, he looked up again. That single thread of hope sparked in his tone as he said, “Okay—okay, but… she won’t try anything on the trip, right? I mean—there are chaperones everywhere, other drones around, it’s not like—” He tried to keep his voice calm, tried to reason it out, but Uzi could hear the anxiety creeping through the cracks.

 

She blinked once. Then again. Hard. Her whole body tensed, a flare of disbelief and frustration coursing up her spine like electricity.

 

He still didn’t get it.

 

Her jaw set, and her voice came out clipped, her tone frayed at the edges. She interrupts him before he can say anything else.

 

“That’s exactly why I wanted to talk to you,” she said, sharp. “Because V said that J’s planning to try something during the trip.”

 

The fear in Uzi’s chest was no longer just a quiet throb. Now it was boiling—rising with her pulse, tightening in her throat. Because if even he was this shaken… what chance did she have?

 

N’s head moved in a small, stubborn shake—like he was trying to physically will her words away. His eyes were wide, blinking rapidly, and his voice cracked just slightly when he finally spoke.

 

“No…” he muttered, his tone shaky but insistent, “That just doesn’t make sense. J wouldn’t—she’s not… she’s not  dumb. That wouldn’t be smart. Again, there are drones everywhere , someone would definitely notice. Someone would see.”

 

Uzi’s face remained blank, unimpressed. Her eyes locked onto his, hard and unflinching. She didn’t even hesitate before cutting in.

 

No,” she said flatly, her tone more bitter than anything. “That’s exactly why it’s perfect. If I disappear during the trip, who’s going to know what happened? Who’s going to suspect her? ” She gestured slightly, voice dropping. “She wouldn’t attack in public. She’d wait until I’m alone. She’d corner me.”

 

N’s mouth opened again, but no words came. He seemed to deflate for a second, his posture tense while his eyes darted to the side, thinking. Then, slowly, he took a deeper breath. When he spoke again, it was with quiet determination—like he was trying to reassert some kind of control over the situation, even if it was slipping through his fingers.

 

“Then… then just stay with me,” he said, almost pleading now. “I’ll keep you safe, I swear—”

 

No—,” Uzi bit out, her voice sharp enough to cut him off before he could finish.

 

Her glare hardened, jaw clenched tight enough that she could feel the pressure in her temples. She was trying not to lose her temper, but she could feel it sweltering—this was too much, too fast, and it felt like no one could understand. Not even him.

 

“I can’t just stick with you,” she continued, and there was a strain in her voice now, just under the surface. “J wouldn’t hesitate if it was just the two of us. You’re one of them, too. So what reason would you have to stop her if I wasn’t supposed to know?”

 

N flinched—barely, but she saw it.

 

Uzi’s arms crossed tightly in front of her, like she needed to physically hold herself together. The pressure in her chest was unbearable, like something was slowly pushing her down with every breath. Her mind wouldn’t stop racing, and her thoughts were spiraling into worst-case scenarios she didn’t know how to stop.

 

She wasn’t just scared. She was angry. Angry at J. Angry at N. Angry at the way everything kept unraveling faster than she could piece it together.

 

And now… she was backed into a corner.

 

N’s face fell completely. Any trace of his usual gentle demeanor shattered beneath the weight of her words, leaving him standing there like something fragile that had just cracked. His eyes darted toward her, wide and startled—like he was scrambling for something to say but found his throat closing instead.

 

“I– I could…” he stammered, voice catching. “We could figure something out. I’ll… I’ll fix this, Uzi, I promise. Everything’s going to—”

 

She couldn’t take it anymore. She couldn’t keep pretending.

 

No!” Uzi snapped, her voice rising like it had been holding back a storm. It hit the walls like a strike of lightning, sharp and raw. “ No, everything is not going to be okay!” 

 

Her hands curled into fists at her sides, and her breathing was heavier now, tight in her chest, each word building on the next like she couldn’t stop even if she wanted to.

 

Her voice trembled—not with fear, but with fury, and fear buried underneath it. “You can’t fix this, N! There’s nothing you can do to stop J! Nothing!” 

 

He took a step back, visibly shaken. But Uzi didn’t pause, didn’t give him time to recover.

 

“The only reason I even agreed to meet you here was because this stupid museum has cameras and other drones all over the place—so I knew she wouldn’t try anything here . But the second I’m alone again—outside of anyone’s sight—I’m dead! You understand that?! Dead!” 

 

N tried to say something—but his lips moved and no sound came out. His hands hovered in front of him slightly like he wanted to reach for her but didn’t dare.

 

Uzi was already past the point of holding back.

 

“There’s nothing you can do to protect me!” she yelled, voice cracking at the edges. “So why can’t you just understand that?! Why do you even care so much?!” 

 

Her words cut deeper than she meant them to, but she couldn’t stop. She needed  to say it.

 

“It doesn’t make any sense!” she shouted, chest heaving. “Why do you care?!

 

N visibly flinched at that. His eyes were wide, mouth slightly open, breath caught in his throat. Like she’d just hit something inside him he didn’t even know was vulnerable.

 

But she still didn’t stop.

 

Her voice was quieter now, but sharper. Bitter. “I didn’t ask for this, you know,” she muttered, shaking her head. “I didn’t want to know what you were. I didn’t want any of this.”

 

The words came faster now, cold and angry and laced with the sting of helplessness.


“It’s not my fault V attacked me. It’s not my fault I
know what she is. What you all are.” Her voice dropped slightly—but the accusation hit like a punch.

 

“And you knew . You knew what she was. You knew everything. ” Her tone darkened, accusing. “And you let me go there that night. You didn’t warn me. You could’ve made something up—anything—and stopped me. But you didn’t. You lied.” 

 

She was trembling now, standing stiffly, her voice trembling along with her frame. The exhaustion, the fear, the anger—it was all catching up to her at once. And beneath it all, the betrayal.

 

“You could’ve stopped me from finding out. But you didn’t.

 

And in that moment, Uzi wasn’t sure if she hated him, or just hated that she didn’t.

 

N stood there like a shadow of himself—his posture slightly hunched, his shoulders tense, and his hands twitching at his sides as if unsure whether to raise them in defense or not.

 

When he finally spoke, his voice was barely above a whisper, raw and cracked at the edges like something fragile trying to hold itself together. “I’m… I’m so sorry, Uzi,” he murmured. “I never wanted any of this to happen. I didn’t mean to lie. I never meant to hurt you. I just… I care about you so much. I don’t want anything to happen to you, I just want you to be okay, I don’t want you to—” 

 

His voice faltered—he couldn’t even finish the sentence.

 

And yet, somehow, that made Uzi feel worse. It twisted something inside her, but she refused to let it show.

 

Her anger was a fire, and the moment of softness in his voice only fed it oxygen.

 

Her voice came out colder now, lower. No longer shouting—but the kind of quiet that came with a storm building beneath the surface.

 

“Is it just because I remind you of her?” she asked flatly.

 

N blinked, confusion flashing across his face like a slap. “What…?” he asked, his brows furrowing slightly. “What are you talking abou—?”

 

He didn’t even get the chance to finish.

 

Uzi’s voice turned razor-sharp, slicing through the space between them like a blade. “There you go again,” she said bitterly. “Lying. Like you always do.” 

 

The betrayal churned in her chest like lava boiling over. She took a half-step forward, her eyes narrowed. “What is wrong with you?” she spat. “Why do you do this? Why do you keep pretending like everything’s fine when all you do is hide things and lie and keep secrets?” 

 

N looked like she’d hit him. He took a slow breath in, but no sound came out. His gaze dropped, guilt pooling in his expression like he was already drowning in it.

 

“You’re so selfish,” Uzi hissed. Her fists were clenched now, trembling at her sides. “You let me believe I mattered. You let me think I was special. But I wasn’t. I was just a repeat, wasn’t I?” She scoffed bitterly and shook her head. “Yeah, I know all about her,” she continued coldly. That drone before me. The one you were ‘close’ with. The one you didn’t bother to mention until now.” 

 

Her next words dripped with venom. “V told me everything.

 

And just like that, the room felt too quiet.

 

The buzzing tension between them had nowhere else to go but inward—curling deep into Uzi’s chest like something sick. She wasn’t yelling anymore. She didn’t need to. Her words were more than enough.

 

She didn’t even know what reaction she wanted from him anymore. Anger? Denial? An apology?

 

Maybe she just wanted to see if he’d even try to fight back… or if he’d let her walk away.

 

Regardless, Uzi still didn’t relent. Her glare could have cut steel. Her scowl deepened as she stared N down, her fists clenched at her sides and her shoulders tense with a storm of emotion.

 

Her whole frame radiated fury, but beneath that anger—just barely held together—was something far more devastating: betrayal.

 

She was hurting. Badly.

 

He had lied to her. Over and over again. And maybe, if he had just been honest with her from the start—if he’d trusted her with the truth instead of dancing around it, burying it beneath half-answers and vague silence—maybe things wouldn’t be like this. Maybe she wouldn’t be standing here, feeling like her heart was being ripped in half by someone she’d let herself believe wouldn’t hurt her. 

 

She knew V hadn’t told her everything. She wasn’t stupid. V didn’t even know the full story herself, apparently.

 

But V had told her enough to make her question everything she thought she knew about N.

 

Some drone. Some other girl, from who-knows-when. Someone who, apparently, had also found out what he was. Someone who—unlike Uzi— left after finding out. Someone who wanted nothing to do with him once she saw him for what he really was. And just like that, J had gone after her too. Planned to kill her, just like she was with Uzi.

 

That girl had gotten lucky, though.

 

She had moved.

 

Uzi wouldn’t be so lucky. She wasn’t going anywhere.

 

And worst of all? She had made the choice not to leave. She chose not to judge N for what he was. She’d accepted it. Chosen to stay. Chosen him. And after all that, after the risk she took in trusting him… he’d kept quiet. Pretended like she was the only one. Pretended like there wasn’t a past—that he hadn’t already been through this exact thing with someone else. 

 

Was that all she was to him?

 

Just a rerun?

 

Some emotional do-over?

 

She’d trusted him. Not like she trusted just anyone—no, she trusted him more than she had trusted anyone in years. She thought he cared . Not just the way someone cares in passing, but the kind of care that’s deep and real and rare. The kind she didn’t even think she was capable of receiving until he came along. 

 

But maybe that had all been fake.

 

Maybe he never really saw her—only the echoes of someone else.

 

A replacement.

 

Recycled affection stuffed into a new shape.

 

The realization twisted her stomach, leaving a cold weight in her chest. She shouldn’t have let herself get close. Letting him in had been a mistake. One she was now paying for.

 

And somehow, standing there and seeing the guilt written all over his face only made her feel worse. Because it meant maybe he did care. And that just made the betrayal burn even more.

 

N's mouth opened with a desperate inhale, as if he were about to say something—anything—to make it right. But the words tangled in his throat, stammering out in fragments.

 

“Uzi—please, I can explain—it's not what it sounds like—What did V even tell you? I swear, it wasn’t—”

 

But that only lit the fuse.

 

Uzi snapped again.

 

Her voice cracked beneath the weight of rage and pain, rising sharply as she cut him off. “No. I don’t want to hear it.” Her words were shaking now, just like her hands. “How am I supposed to believe you’re not lying again? You could’ve told me the truth. It wouldn’t have even been hard! So why didn’t you!?” 

 

Her voice dropped, trembling with fury that bordered dangerously on heartbreak. “Is being honest with me really that hard? Do you hate me that much?”

 

Any composure N had tried to hold onto was gone now, ripped out of him by her words. “Uzi…” he murmured—quiet, broken—but she didn’t let him finish.

 

“Am I just a replacement to you?” she asked, her voice quieter now but infinitely sharper. “Is that all I ever was? Some cheap copy of someone you couldn’t keep? Did you only care because I reminded you of her?

 

That struck something deep in N. His posture faltered completely, shoulders caving inward as if he were trying to make himself smaller. The raw hurt in his eyes was undeniable—wide, glassy, and on the verge of tears. His lip trembled faintly, and his mouth opened again, but no words came. It looked like she’d taken the wind out of him. Like she’d knocked down whatever fragile dam he’d built to keep it all together.

 

He looked devastated.

 

But even seeing that, Uzi couldn’t back down—not now. Her eyes burned, not from grief, but from the heat of being wounded this deeply by someone she’d trusted more than anyone else. She was barely keeping herself together, her chest tight, jaw locked, tears threatening to well up in her eyes even as she blinked it back with everything she had.

 

She shook her head slowly, more to herself than to him. Her voice dropped to a whisper, raw and brittle.

 

She didn’t want to hear excuses. Not anymore.

 

Whatever this was—whatever they were—it was already unraveling before her, thread by painful thread.

 

Uzi stood stiffly, every wire in her chest feeling like it was twisting into itself, every emotion jagged and sharp against her throat.

 

She looked at N, eyes shimmering with frustration and something far more fragile beneath the surface.

 

Her voice cracked when she spoke again, strained and raw, but she didn’t give him the chance to respond. “You wanna know something?” she asked, almost spitting the words—but there was no venom behind it.

 

Just hurt.

 

She didn’t wait for a reply. Her eyes flicked downward, as if she couldn’t bear to keep looking at him. Her fists clenched tightly at her sides, knuckles pale. She took a breath—shallow and shaky—and forced the words out.

 

“You’re the only drone I’ve ever… been this close to.” Her voice caught on the words like they were blades. “I’ve never—”

 

She faltered, looking away sharply and tightening her jaw. Her whole body was rigid with the effort of keeping control.

 

“I’ve never kissed anyone like that before, N. Never been this close…” she managed to say. “I thought we had something. I thought I finally—finally—meant something to someone.” 

 

Her voice quivered. “No one’s ever made me feel like this before. Like I’m worth something. Like someone could actually… care about me.”

 

She paused—just for a second, long enough for it to sting. “But I guess I was wrong. Because you never even saw me. You saw her the whole time.”

 

That was when N said her name—louder than before, a desperate edge to his voice.

 

No—Uzi, please. Please just listen to me!

 

His hands came up slightly, and he gestured sharply with his hands, “It wasn’t like that—! I never looked at you and thought of her. I don’t even—she's not—” he stumbled, tripping over his own words as his expression contorted with panic. “I don’t know what V told you, but it’s not like that. Not like you think. I swear. It just… it wasn’t!

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes, completely unconvinced.

 

Her arms crossed over her chest, the gesture more defensive than anything. She looked at him bitterly, her voice flat and tired.

 

“Then tell me,” she said coldly. “Why do you care  so much? How do you keep acting like I mean something to you—if you’re not still thinking about someone else?” 

 

It wasn’t a question to be answered, not really. It was a dare. A challenge.

 

Because right now, the only thing Uzi felt was betrayed. And even N’s desperation didn’t feel like enough to unravel the weight of everything she'd just confessed—everything she thought they had.

 

N’s head shook quickly, eyes wide and glassy with desperation. His voice came out strained, like it physically hurt to get the words out.


“No—Uzi, I don’t see you as someone else. I
never have.” As he spoke his hands hovered in midair for a moment, before he placed his palm to his chest. He clutched the fabric of his shirt ever so slightly.


“I’ve always cared about
you. After everything, I thought—” his voice cracked, “I thought you cared about me too. I thought we—” 


He stumbled, glancing down, as if the weight of his own words was too much. “You didn’t judge me. You didn’t leave. I thought that meant—”

 

But Uzi cut in sharply, her voice laced with venom that was born less from cruelty and more from the mess of pain tangling inside her.

 

“Don’t turn this around on me,” she snapped, glaring daggers. “Just because you’re not getting what you want doesn’t mean you get to guilt me into trusting you again.”

 

She regretted the words the second they left her mouth.


Because even now—even as she tried to drown out the part of her that still
caredshe knew he wasn't trying to guilt trip her. He wasn’t like that. He did care. And he wasn’t lying about how he felt. But she was too blinded by rage and hurt and betrayal that she couldn’t see it—or more like, wouldn’t let herself. All she could see now was the look in his face: the devastation. He looked like she had just shoved him off a cliff.

 

But she didn’t back down. She couldn’t. If she hesitated now, she’d fall apart.

 

And still, N didn’t defend himself—not in the way she expected.

 

His voice cracked again as he tried to speak, but he had to stop and swallow down the emotion that was building in his throat. “I’m not—” he stammered. “I’m not trying to manipulate you, Uzi. I swear. I’m sorry. I’m so— so sorry if I hurt you. I didn’t want this. I never wanted any of this to happen.” His breath trembled as he exhaled. “I just… I care about you. That’s it. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. To make sure you’re okay. I don’t want you to get hurt. I don’t want to lose you—!” 

 

His voice had gone almost hoarse by the end of it, like the words had been scraped raw from his throat. He looked exhausted. Vulnerable.

 

But Uzi—Uzi wasn’t ready to see any of that.

 

She snapped again, louder this time, her tone bitter and cracking at the edges. “You keep saying that! You keep repeating the same thing like it’s going to fix this! Like it’s going to magically make me trust you again! Why even bother if you know it’s not going to work?!

 

Her breathing was unsteady now. Her voice shook—but not with weakness. It shook because it was holding back the wave that threatened to break everything inside her.

 

Because deep down, some part of her still believed him.

 

N’s voice cracked like glass under pressure, barely holding together. Please…” he whispered, reaching for her without even thinking. “Please don’t leave me. I–…I don’t have anyone else, Uzi. You’re all I have… I can’t lose you too—please, I can’t!” 

 

There were tears now—she could hear it in his voice, see the shimmer building in his eyes, the way his whole posture trembled like it was one second from collapsing. His hand extended, palm open, fingers slightly curled as if hoping she’d meet him halfway.

 

But she didn’t.

 

Before she could even think—before she could stop  herself—her arm shot out, and she smacked  his hand away.

 

The sharp clap of it echoed softly through the wide, empty corridor like a gunshot.

 

N’s hand recoiled, his entire body flinching back like he’d just been hit with a jolt of static. His expression went completely still.

 

Dead still.

 

His expression completely dropped from his face in an instant. His eyes widened slightly, and then dimmed—like someone had flipped off the light behind them. His lips parted just enough to breathe, but no sound came. His hand lingered in the air for a fraction of a second longer before it slowly dropped back to his side, trembling.

 

Uzi’s own chest rose and fell with shallow, uneven breaths. Her voice tore from her throat, ragged and hoarse.

 

“Get away from me!”

 

N blinked.

 

“I don’t want to hear it! I don’t care what you have to say anymore—I’m done! I’ll figure this out myself, I don’t need you—I never needed you! Just… just leave me alone! ” Her voice cracked on that last word. She barely held it together. Her jaw was clenched so tight it hurt. 

 

Her vision was blurring, not from rage but from the sheer force it took not to break down.

 

Not here.

 

Not in front of him.

 

Through her haze, she noticed something—N wasn’t crying in the way she expected.

 

He was eerily quiet.

 

A few tears slipped down his cheeks, unaccompanied by any sobs. His shoulders were shaking—but it was silent. He wasn’t even blinking, just staring at his hand, the same one she had slapped away.

 

It was like he was trying to understand what had just happened. Like the sting of it hadn’t just been physical—it had sunk somewhere deeper. And he looked so small, standing there.

 

Finally, after a long moment, he looked back up at her.

 

His voice came out barely audible, just one word. One desperate, final plea.

 

…Please…

 

That was it. Just that.


No defense. No excuse. Just
please.

 

Uzi couldn’t take it. Was about to turn, ready to walk away, her throat burning, her chest tight, her entire body coiled like a spring. Every part of her screamed to escape this moment.

 

But then—

 

A voice cut through the air behind N.

 

“Hey—what’s going on?”

 

It someone else. A drone’s voice. Behind N.

 

Both of them froze.


N stiffened like he’d been caught doing something wrong, while Uzi’s breath caught in her throat.

 

She didn’t even register who the voice belonged to yet. All she could feel was the panic crawling up her spine like frost.

 

Because someone had seen.


Someone had
heard.

 

Uzi blinked in disbelief, her body tensing instinctively as the voice continued.

 

“Is he bothering you?”

 

The words hung in the air like a blade waiting to fall. She took a slow step to the side, peering past N’s frame—and her eyes widened.

 

It was Thad.

 

Thad!? Her mind reeled. What the hell is he doing here!?

 

Before she could form a coherent thought, he was already walking toward them—expression uncharacteristically tight, steps measured.

 

Neither she nor N moved. It was as though the tension had turned their legs to stone, locking them in place. N didn’t even glance back. His posture was drawn inward, hunched over slightly like he was trying to shield himself.

 

When Thad finally reached them, he stepped just ahead of Uzi, subtly shifting to place himself between her and N. Uzi's breath caught. His body language was clear—protective, almost confrontational.

 

What was he doing?

 

Then he spoke, his voice even but lined with an edge Uzi had never heard from him before. “Look—no offense or anything. I get that we’re, like… friends or whatever. But Uzi’s my best  friend. So if you’ve got a problem with her, then you’ve got a problem with me.”

 

Uzi’s heart skipped a beat. And not in a good way.

 

Thad’s tone wasn’t loud or aggressive. It wasn’t performative. It was… serious. And it was weirdly jarring.

 

She wasn’t used to Thad being anything other than loud, goofy, and slightly annoying. She’d never seen him like this—grounded, firm, genuinely protective. It made something twist in her chest.

 

N didn’t respond immediately. He straightened up slightly and raised a hand to wipe under his eye, trying to collect himself.

 

Uzi could tell he was trying to act composed, like he hadn’t just been falling apart a minute ago—but it was written all over his face. His cheeks were streaked with tears, his eyes were red, and the stiffness in his stance was anything but confident.

 

He could’ve easily seemed intimidating—he was taller than Thad, and when he wanted to, he could carry himself with an unsettling calm. But right now? There was nothing threatening about him. He just looked tired. Fragile.

 

Uzi noticed Thad narrow one eye, raising an eyebrow. His brows knit slightly, the irritation faint but noticeable. He didn’t step forward, but the unspoken tension made it clear he was willing to, if it came to that.

 

That was what finally broke through the haze in Uzi’s mind.

 

No. This couldn’t happen.

 

This wasn’t right. N didn’t deserve this—not from Thad, and not from her either, if she was being honest. And she couldn’t let it escalate. Her gut clenched as she silently stepped closer, drawing a careful breath to steady herself.

 

Without saying anything at first, she reached out and placed her hand on Thad’s shoulder.

 

He glanced back at her. She could feel his tension—his body was rigid beneath her palm, but the second their eyes met, it softened just a little.

 

She hesitated only for a second before speaking—quietly, but with intention. “…Thad.”

 

He blinked at her. She held his gaze.


“Calm down.”

 

Her voice wasn’t pleading. It was tired. Grounded. Not angry—but heavy.

 

She didn’t want to get into this now. Not with N standing there like that. Not with Thad ready to throw words or worse. She didn’t want this to be another moment she’d regret.

 

So, she decided she might as well say something to deescalate this. To say the best possible thing she could.

 

Uzi let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding, her shoulders sagging slightly as she answered, her voice quiet and uneven. “Nothing’s wrong,” she muttered. “I’m not—” She stopped herself with a sigh, withdrawing her hand from Thad’s shoulder and casting her gaze to the side.

 

She pinched the bridge of her nose, fingers trembling faintly. The words spilled from her without much thought, as if her mouth was moving on its own. “I’m not… mad at him. It’s fine. Really. There’s no problem.”

 

Her voice was hoarse. She wasn’t sure if she believed herself—but she needed Thad to back down. She wasn’t ready for another explosion, not now. Her words trailed off as she added, almost dismissively, “We were just… talking something out. It’s not important.”

 

Then she looked back up—and made the mistake of meeting N’s eyes.

 

N’s entire posture shifted—his shoulders slumped, the tension he’d been carrying like a steel trap draining from him in a visible wave. His arms loosened at his sides. His face, tight with pain and confusion only a moment ago, softened with quiet relief. His expression didn’t change drastically, but… it didn’t need to.

 

He blinked once, slowly, almost disbelieving. Like her words alone had shaken something loose in him. Had that really been all it took—her saying she wasn’t mad?

 

And just like that, everything in her chest cracked open.

 

Uzi’s heart thudded, hard, as a sickening wave of clarity crashed through her like a freight train.

 

Oh. Oh no.

 

This couldn’t be how things ended. She couldn’t let it end like this.

 

If Thad hadn’t shown up when he did, if he hadn’t intervened… she would’ve stormed off. Furious. Hurt. She would've told herself she was done. And for a little bit, maybe she would’ve believed it.

 

But she knew herself.

 

She would’ve walked away with all that rage twisted around her ribs—and not even a minute later, she’d want nothing more than to turn around. To say she was sorry. To tell him she didn’t mean it. That she didn’t want to lose this.

 

But she wouldn’t have gone back. No. She’d be too afraid. Too ashamed of the mess she made. She would’ve spent the rest of the trip avoiding him, telling herself it was his fault, when she knew —deep down—it wasn’t.

 

And by the time she was brave enough to try and fix it… it might’ve been too late.

 

But now?

 

Now she was here. Still standing in front of him. Still looking him in the eyes. And even though her chest still burned, even though her hands were still cold, she had time to think.

 

And she wasn’t going to let this moment go. Not this time.

 

Not when she knew how badly she wanted him to stay.

 

Thad’s eyes flicked to Uzi, one brow raised, concern thinly veiled behind his usual laid-back tone. “You sure you’re okay? You looked kinda upset…”

 

Uzi didn’t answer right away. Her mind was still lagging behind, overwhelmed, like she was buffering in real time. Thad’s presence still felt jarring—like a jigsaw piece shoved into the wrong part of the puzzle. What was he even doing here?

 

She blinked slowly, then shook her head faintly, sidestepping his question completely. Her voice was quieter than before. “Wait… how long were you standing there?”

 

Thad gave a light shrug, glancing between her and N. “I dunno. Just a few seconds? I came to get N since we’re in the same group and he was gone for a while. Thought he maybe got lost or something.”

 

His tone was casual—like he was talking about the weather—but the weight in the air didn’t lift. If anything, it pressed down harder.

 

There was a pause, a stillness that stretched between all three of them. It wasn’t awkward. It was just heavy.

 

Then Thad broke it, like he always did. But not with a joke or a comment, but something strangely… calm.

 

“Well,” he said plainly, his voice even, “we might as well head out now.”

 

No push. No prying. No follow-up questions.

 

And that was what made it feel strange.

 

Uzi’s eyes flicked toward him, scanning his face like she was trying to read a language she didn’t understand. His tone wasn’t sharp. He didn’t sound irritated. He didn’t even look particularly confused. If anything, he seemed like he was trying not to be a problem.

 

But something about his demeanor felt off. Not in a bad way—just… uncharacteristic. Thad never took things seriously. He joked through everything, flippant and loud and overly dramatic. But here he was, subdued, matter-of-fact, almost protective  in the way he placed himself near her earlier.

 

It didn’t sit quite right.

 

Still, she tried to rationalize it. He’d probably just wandered around a corner and seen her mid-yell, N looking wrecked, and had absolutely no context. And now that Uzi had said it was fine, there wasn’t much else to say. Of course he’d suggest leaving. It made sense. Logically.

 

But logic didn’t stop that twist in her gut—the nagging thought that something here didn’t line up. Like she was missing something. Like there was something in Thad’s tone she hadn’t heard before.

 

But she didn’t have the space in her head to think about that now.

 

Her attention, still reeling from the last several minutes, drifted back toward N. The guilt hadn’t left. The hurt still lingered. But so did something else—resolve. She wasn’t done yet.

 

Thad gave Uzi a sideways glance and lifted his hand in a casual finger gun, his usual grin returning just enough to pass for normal. “See ya’ later, Uzi,” he said, voice light but distant in a way that made Uzi’s stomach tighten. He turned without another word and started walking back the way he’d come.

 

No parting word for N.

 

Just a brisk, silent departure—until Thad realized N hadn’t moved. He paused mid-step and looked over his shoulder. “You coming?”

 

N blinked, like he’d just snapped back into the moment. His eyes were wide and unfocused, and it took him a full second to respond.

 

“O-Oh… um, yeah—” he muttered, voice low and shaky. He turned away from Uzi, and he didn’t even look at her.

 

Just like that, he started walking—following Thad in the opposite direction. Further away.

 

…What the hell was that!?

 

Uzi’s heart skipped. Her thoughts spiraled.

 

No, no, no—


That was it.

 

That had been her chance—her window—and she let it slam shut.

 

Why didn’t she say more? Why didn’t she do something? Her throat burned with the rising panic that she’d just made the biggest mistake she possibly could. Because again, she knew herself. 

 

She knew that if N texted her again, she’d leave it unread. She’d scroll past it, stare at it for an hour, close the app, and pretend it didn’t hurt. She’d avoid him, make excuses, convince herself he didn’t want her to talk to him anyway. And the more time that passed, the more impossible it would feel to fix things.

 

Her legs refused to move. Her fingers clenched at her sides. That was it. She blew it. Fucked everything up, and it was her fault.


But then—


Then N turned around.


Just for a second.

 

And that was all it took to knock the wind out of her.

 

He looked at her—not like she was someone he was angry at, or someone he hated. He looked at her like he was still caught in everything he didn’t get the chance to say.

 

There was a quiet, hollow ache in his expression, the kind that came from caring too much and not knowing what to do with it. His frown was soft, barely there—but it pulled at something deep in her chest.

 

Uzi didn’t think. She just moved.

 

She raised a hand, waving slightly. Her heart thudded hard against her ribs, and her face flushed with a strange, nervous heat. She pointed to herself with her index finger—and slowly, carefully, mouthed the words: Sit with me on the bus.

 

It wasn’t much. It was clumsy. Pathetic, even.

 

But it was real.

 

For a moment, N just stood there. She thought maybe he didn’t see. Or maybe he didn’t want to. Maybe it was too late.

 

Then—he nodded.

 

Just once.

 

Simple. Subtle. Quiet. But it was enough.

 

That single gesture settled something deep inside her, like a raging sea suddenly going still. The tension in her shoulders dropped, and a breath she hadn’t even realized she was holding slipped past her lips. The panic didn’t disappear, but it faded just enough for her to think.

 

She’d done something.

 

She’d kept the door open.

 

But now… now she had to walk through it.

 

The next conversation wouldn’t be easier. It wouldn’t suddenly fix everything. But she had just made sure that there would be a next time.

 

And that meant she had to be ready for whatever came next.

Notes:

Imagine if I js ended the chapter when Thad was like “hey what’s going on” and then didn’t reveal it was him

I was debating on doing that for a minute but then I realized if I was a reader, I’d be so fucking mad 😭💔 LIKE BRO that would kill me

Well regardless I didn’t do that so that’s great 😋

OMGGGG this chapter literally killed me when I was writing it I almost died

I felt so bad making N so upset 😭😭😭 like omg poor baby IM SORRY stop crying 💔

Have to remember it’s for the plot 😈

As much as I’d love for Uzi to have a *bit* of sympathy and stop yelling at N and then apologize, that would be so out of character for her 💔

Ugh this girl makes me so mad sometimes 😒

I’m glad I ended it the way I did though cuz imagine if it was js like, Uzi stormed off and then felt bad and then ignores N for the rest of the trip 💔

Like I couldn’t do that I would probably explode 💔

So *extremely* lucky for her, N and Thad were in a group together, cuz if they weren’t then that’s what predictably would’ve happened

But Uzi had .5 seconds to come to her senses and realize she’s a fucking idiot 😭😭 not tryna bash her but like,,, okay, so I get it why she’s upset with N, but she’s blowing it so outta proportion. But that’s js kinda how she is and like, I love her sm but girl u gotta work on processing ur emotions and thinking in a more logical sense instead of emotionally 💔 wonder if she’s ever considered therapy

WAIT omg I think a while ago in the fic I mentioned she tried therapy for a bit after the whole thing with her mother, but she didn’t even talk to her therapist, so she stopped going to therapy entirely 🥲 this girl is gonna be the death of me

Okay one thing I wanna say, off topic but not, is abt the whole thing abt N being close to some other girl in the past. I’ll js say now that I’m not gonna give her a name cuz I don’t think that’s too important, and also if I did it’d be technically an “original character” and I vowed to not have any original characters in this story 💔 js a personal preference but I *really* don’t like OC inserts in stories. No hate to anyone who does, it’s again js a personal preference

But yeah pretty much she’s not gonna have a specified name, and I’ll js say also it’ll make more sense in the next chapter… not gonna say more though cuz I don’t wanna spoil the next chapter. Sorry if it seems a little confusing but again I promise it’ll make more sense soon u js gotta bear with me 😭🤚

And I’m gonna be straight up abt something, I’m not gonna have her suddenly appear at any point in the future of this story. Like not gonna have a ‘oh she moved back to where they live and is going to the school again’ cuz like NO ugh I genuinely hate stuff like that. There’d be absolutely no reason to have that happen, and there wouldn’t be a ‘oh she likes N again and her and Uzi fight over him’ or some shit, for reasons that’ll be very apparent in the next chapter.

Speaking of the next chapter, it should come out Thursday(?) at the *latest*, hopefully earlier. The only reason it’ll be so late though is cuz the next chapter is gonna be really long, and I need time to finish writing it and edit it and stuff. But Thursday is again the *latest,* could be earlier than that.

I was planning to post this chapter tomorrow but I already finished and edited it yesterday, and like I was so excited to post it that I’m posting it early today. I usually post in the evening but I have the time and like, I literally again was SOOO excited cuz this chapter turned out so well I think

I don’t think there’s been another point in this fic where Uzi got super pissed off at other than when she initially found out abt the disassembly drones after V attacked her, and like she was obvi upset abt the fact that N knew the whole time and still let her go to the school. And then she kinda ignored him for a week after that if I remember correctly 💔 and then I think the party happened in stuff a little after that and then yeah they were doing pretty good until… now ig 😭

Regardless I think the next chapter is gonna be great too. Also I’ll say it’ll be dialogue heavy as well, just so yall know. But AGAIN not saying any more than that 🤭

Oh and one more thing, I named the title of this chapter after a song cuz I thought the lyrics fit really well. I’ll talk abt it more in the next author’s notes cuz im running outta characters 💔 not gonna link it though jsyk

Okay that’s abt everything I had to say. Byeee!!!

and omg it took me like, I kid u not, an hour to post this… like with editing everything and putting the italics and stuff 😭 well at least I’m done now 🥲

BYE

-

EDIT: Okay guys change of plans- next chapter will be posted tomorrow (7/10) cuz I’m a bit busy today 😣 pinkie swear it will be though!!! See yall then 🥲

Chapter 85: Impede

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The last hour had passed in a haze.

 

Uzi had walked back to her group, but the world around her felt distant—like she was underwater, or watching through a screen with the volume turned down.

 

Sam hadn’t said much when she came back, and if he had, Uzi hadn’t noticed. Afterwards, his usual rambling faded into background noise, unimportant and forgettable.

 

Doll, on the other hand… Uzi had noticed her. There was a subtle crease in Doll’s brow, a rare flicker of emotion in her otherwise unreadable expression when she saw Uzi. She hadn’t said anything, hadn’t asked questions, but Uzi could tell . She knew Doll could tell that something was up, that something was different when Uzi came back. But, thankfully, she didn’t pry. 

 

They just ended up continuing the way they had before, drifting through the remaining exhibits in silence. The polished glass cases, the faded relics, the walls of dated photographs—all of it bled together in Uzi’s mind. She couldn’t recall any of it now. None of it had mattered.

 

Now, they were outside.

 

The field trip was over.

 

Drones milled around the front of the museum, voices echoing over one another in a vague chatter Uzi didn’t care to parse. Chaperones were doing headcounts, someone up front—probably the main guide—was giving closing instructions. Uzi didn’t hear a word. Her eyes scanned the crowd.

 

She was only focused on one thing: finding N

 

The quiet time she’d had since the argument—or more like, Uzi just yelling at N…—had been a curse and a blessing. Every replay of that fight in her mind twisted something in her chest. But even through the lingering embarrassment, the regret, the leftover heat of her anger, there was something else: clarity.

 

She had meant  what she said, to an extent. She hadn’t been wrong to feel the way she did—about being lied to, about the fear of being replaced, about the possibility that he’d only cared because of who she reminded him of. That all still mattered.

 

But N had offered to explain.

 

He’d looked at her like he wanted so badly for her to just hear him out. And for her own sake, even if part of her still bristled at the thought of it, she knew that if she walked away from this without closure, it would eat her alive. She wouldn’t get over it. She’d spend weeks obsessing over what she thought she knew, letting her mind twist every unanswered question into something darker.

 

She needed to hear him out.

 

Even if it hurt. Even if it scared her.

 

Uzi took a deep breath, the air cool and dry against her lungs. Her heart pounded hard behind her plating. She looked out across the crowd once more.

 

She had no idea what N would say.

 

But she was going to find him.

 

The thought of him, though, yet again reminded her of the fight itself. At this point, Uzi had gone over every detail of it—over and over—until it gnawed at her from the inside out. The shouting, the accusations, the coldness in her voice… all of it echoed relentlessly.

 

But more than anything, she kept thinking about how he had looked at her.

 

N hadn’t yelled. Not once.

 

He hadn’t raised his voice or snapped back or said something cruel just to make her hurt the way she had hurt him. He’d just… stood there. Like he didn’t know what to do with himself. Like every word she’d thrown at him was chipping away at something fragile inside him—and he was letting it.

 

Not because he was weak, but because he respected her too much to fight back. Or maybe he was too worried about what would happen if he had…

 

That realization had hit Uzi like a gut punch.

 

She’d been so caught up in her own pain, her own fear, that she hadn’t stopped to think about how deeply her words might’ve cut. Now that she had the space to reflect, it only made her sick with guilt.

 

She had called him selfish. Meanwhile, he’d spent the entire conversation trying to reassure her, to make her feel safe. She’d accused him of seeing her as a replacement, and he’d just… taken it. 

 

And when she thought back to his voice—to that raw desperation when he’d said she was all he had —her stomach twisted. She didn’t even fully understand what he’d meant by that. But it hadn’t felt like an exaggeration. It had sounded like the truth. A truth heavy with loneliness. 

 

Was she really the only drone he had? The only one he trusted that much?

 

That thought clung to her, fragile and aching. The weight of it was unbearable.

 

And still… even after everything she’d said, even after she’d slapped his hand away, even after she’d yelled at him to get away from her—he hadn’t turned his back on her. 

 

He hadn’t stormed off. He hadn’t cursed her out. When Thad had interrupted, N could’ve ignored her completely. He could’ve refused to look at her.

 

But he hadn’t.

 

He had turned back. Looked her in the eye.

 

And when she’d silently asked him to sit with her on the bus, he nodded. Quiet, hesitant, but sincere.

 

After everything, he still wanted to talk to her.

 

And that… that broke something in her.

 

Because despite how furious she had been, how convinced she was that she didn’t matter to him the way she wanted to—clearly, she did. Maybe more than she realized. Maybe more than he realized.

 

And if that was true… then she had to talk to him. She owed it to him. She owed it to both of them. 

 

Uzi hadn’t even realized how far she’d wandered until she found herself drifting aimlessly through the sea of students and chaperones, the hum of conversation and shuffling footsteps fading into the background.

 

She wasn’t registering faces. She wasn’t really registering anything. Her mind was still back in that hallway—back in that moment with N.

 

But that moment was gone now, and if she wanted to find him again… she needed to stop spiraling and focus.

 

She hadn’t gotten a text. At least, she didn’t think she had—her phone hadn’t buzzed, and she was too tense to even pull it out and check. Part of her didn’t want to. Something about seeing his name on her screen again filled her with too many emotions all at once, like it would snap the fragile calm she was barely holding onto.

 

No, she’d rather run into him naturally. By chance. That felt easier somehow—less pressure. Less risk of rejection.

 

The crowd was shifting, slowly funneling toward the parking lot and the waiting buses. She let her body move with it, barely glancing side to side. But the longer she walked, the more restless she felt.

 

Every second that passed without seeing him made her chest tighten. What if she missed him? What if he’d already gotten on the bus?

 

That possibility hit her like a jolt of electricity.

 

Her steps quickened.

 

Okay—no. She couldn’t just hope she’d see him at the hotel later, or something like that. That wasn’t good enough. She had to try. Even if her hands were cold and her nerves were chewing her up inside, even if the thought of seeing him again made her feel like she was about to combust. She had to at least know that she’d tried. 

 

So she pushed forward, weaving through the crowd with purpose now. If she made it to the front of the group before everyone started boarding, maybe—just maybe—she’d catch him. Just a glimpse. That would be enough to ground her, enough to tell her that she hadn’t missed her chance again. 

 

She scanned the crowd more deliberately now. Faces blurred past her, none of them familiar. No N. No sign of anyone she knew.

 

With every step, a creeping sense of defeat started to weigh her down again.

 

Maybe she’d screwed everything up. Maybe she wouldn’t find him.

 

She didn’t have time to finish that thought before she collided—hard—into someone.

 

The breath caught in her chest as her momentum faltered and she stumbled back, blinking fast and reeling herself back to the present.

 

Uzi had barely registered what—or who—she'd run into. All she knew was that her frustration had hit its limit. With her nerves already fraying and her chest still tight from everything she hadn’t said, she instinctively stepped back and shot a sharp glare up at the drone in front of her.

 

She was fully prepared to spit out something bitter, maybe even storm off—but the second her eyes locked onto his face, everything in her expression unraveled.

 

It was N.

 

He turned to face her, his brows furrowed slightly in confusion, but as recognition sank in, that confusion quickly gave way to something else—something that stopped her cold.

 

He looked… hurt.

 

Not because she’d bumped into him. It was something deeper. His expression shifted in a way that was barely noticeable unless you were really looking—but she was looking.

 

His mouth had tightened ever so slightly, his posture stilled, and his gaze—once so easy and open around her—had suddenly dropped to the side. He didn’t even meet her eyes.

 

Uzi’s heart dropped.

 

The glare she'd worn vanished like it had never been there, and in its place, a tense, guilty neutrality. She didn’t want to look angry. She didn’t even feel  angry anymore—not at him. Not really. Mostly she just felt exhausted. Hollow. A little raw.

 

She tried to force something casual into her voice and broke the silence with a strained, “…Hey.”

 

She winced internally at how it sounded—thin and uncertain, but it was all she could manage.

 

N didn’t look at her when he responded. His voice was quiet, maybe even a little wary. “Hey…”

 

And that was it.

 

They stood there, side by side but oceans apart, while the crowd flowed past them in waves. The museum loomed behind them, the buses waiting ahead, but the two of them just… stood in place, like they didn’t know what to do now.

 

Uzi shifted awkwardly, her hands fidgeting with the hem of her sleeves before she finally offered, “We should probably go find a seat.”

 

N gave a small nod, eyes still not meeting hers. He didn’t say anything. He just nodded.

 

And that silence—more than anything—was what hit her the hardest.

 

She had broken something. Maybe not completely. But enough to change the way he looked at her.

 

She turned toward the bus, walking slowly, waiting to see if he’d follow. Every step forward made her more aware of the weight of the past hour… and of how far apart they suddenly felt.

 

They eventually climbed onto the bus quietly, Uzi stepping up first. Her footsteps felt heavier than usual, her mind flooded with too much at once—regret, hesitation, and a fragile kind of hope she didn’t want to examine too closely.

 

She glanced over her shoulder, just once, more out of instinct than anything.

 

And there he was.

 

N was still behind her, a few steps back, his gaze lowered, his posture a little uncertain—like even now he wasn’t sure whether he should be following.

 

The sight made something twist deep in Uzi’s chest. She forced herself to look away before her face could give anything away and turned her focus to the rows of seats in front of her.

 

She paused, eyes scanning for an option.

 

Normally, she would've beelined to the back, thrown herself against the window with a snide comment and a too-loud sigh. But the idea of going there now only brought back the memory of the ride to the hotel, when she had—

 

Nope. Not right now. This was a terrible time to recall that—

 

So, she knew she couldn’t go to the back…

 

Instead, she settled for the middle. It was neutral. Unassuming. Safe.

 

Most of the seats were already taken, and she lucked out spotting one—empty, tucked beside the window, with the row across from it also vacant.

 

She slipped into it without a word, scooting toward the window and resting her arm on the ledge as casually as she could muster. She didn’t want to look eager. Or nervous. Even if she was both.

 

A second later, she felt the slight shift of the cushion beside her. N had sat down.

 

But not like he usually did.

 

He was angled away just slightly, his posture stiff, and the space between them felt like a canyon. Not physically—they were still sharing the same seat—but he might as well have been a mile away.

 

Uzi didn’t need to look at him to feel it.

 

But she did look. Carefully.

 

And when she saw his face, the pit in her stomach grew heavier.

 

N was clearly doing everything in his power to wear a neutral expression. His eyes were unfocused, cast somewhere down near his lap, and his lips were pressed together in a line that was supposed to look unreadable—but to her, it just looked sad. Forced. Tight with something he didn’t know how to say.

 

And Uzi hated that she had put that expression there.

 

Guilt curled like a vine around her throat, choking the words she wanted to say before she could even find them.

 

He has every right to be upset, she thought bitterly. After everything I said. After how I yelled at him. After I didn’t even let him explain. 

 

But even knowing that, even owning it, didn’t make it easier.

 

She sat still, hands folded in her lap, eyes fixed out the window. But she wasn’t seeing the parking lot. She was only aware of the quiet between them, of the aching space at her side, and the way the weight of the moment pressed against her like gravity.

 

She wanted to fix it.

 

She just no idea how yet.

 

She had to think really hard about what she was going to say… Then Uzi realized—sitting in this uncomfortable silence, side by side with N, she was reminded—painfully, clearly—why she’d asked him to sit with her at all.

 

This wasn’t supposed to be some awkward, heavy moment where they avoided eye contact and pretended like nothing had happened. She had wanted to talk. She had asked him to sit here. Because she needed to understand. She needed to know the truth. 

 

And now, here they were—less than a foot apart, but the distance between them felt as vast as the universe.

 

Still, even though her chest felt tight with guilt, even though her throat ached from holding back everything she really wanted to say—she couldn’t bring herself to apologize. 

 

Not yet.

 

That would mean being vulnerable. And being vulnerable meant opening herself up again, admitting she had hurt, and maybe even that she had hurt him , too. And right now, she couldn’t do that. She didn’t know how

 

So instead, she forced herself to speak. It took every ounce of courage she had just to turn her head toward him. “You wanted to explain yourself, right?”

 

Her voice was flat. Controlled. Not emotionless, but definitely hiding everything she didn’t want to show.

 

N turned to her slowly, like he hadn’t expected her to speak first. His gaze met hers—tired, unsure, but attentive. It wasn’t cold. He still cared. That much was clear.

 

He gave a faint nod, his voice quiet. “Yeah.”

 

There was a beat before he added, just barely above a whisper, “I’ll tell you anything.”

 

Anything. 

 

Uzi blinked at that. Something about the way he said it—so soft, so sincere—it caught her off guard. He wasn’t even hesitating. Even after everything. Even after what she said.

 

Her mind raced for a moment, struggling to find the right question, something to latch onto—but she didn’t need to worry. He’d already said it: anything.

 

So… she’d ask what had been eating at her the most. The thing she didn’t even want to admit had been haunting her since V brought it up.

 

She kept her voice level, firm, like it was just another normal question. “Then tell me how you met her. And what happened.” 

 


She didn’t have to clarify. She knew he’d understand who she meant.

 

The moment the words left her mouth, she felt the tension rise again between them like fog. But she didn’t back down. She couldn’t. This was what she needed. Even if part of her was already afraid of the answer.

 

N hesitated before answering her question, like he had to force the words out of his mouth. Uzi noticed the way his shoulders sank just slightly as he exhaled—a quiet, barely-there sigh that he probably didn’t even realize escaped him.

 

He couldn’t meet her eyes.

 

“She and I met sophomore year,” he began, his voice hushed, almost like he was afraid speaking too loudly would make things worse. “We had a few classes together, some mutual friends. It wasn’t really anything big at first—we just kind of… clicked.”

 

Uzi watched him closely, taking in every shift in his tone, every flicker in his expression. His voice didn’t sound wistful or longing—but still, the words made something in her twist. He continued, carefully.

 

“We had a lot in common, too. And over time, I guess we got really close…”

 

That was the sentence that hit her.

 

We got really close. 

 

Her stomach coiled instantly. It wasn’t anger—not really. It was something heavier.

 

She felt heat rise to her face and tension flood her limbs, her jaw subtly locking. It wasn’t rational, and it wasn’t fair, but she hated hearing that. Hated knowing there had been someone before her. Someone who might’ve known what it felt like to be cared for by N—someone who’d had his time and attention before Uzi even existed in that part of his life. 

 

Robo-god… was she jealous ?

 

Of course she was.

 

She must’ve been scowling without realizing it, because when she glanced back at N, he had stopped talking and was looking at her with visible concern. His eyes flicked across her face, like he wasn’t sure if he had upset her or said something wrong.

 

Uzi immediately tried to soften her expression—but it was harder than she thought. She didn’t want him to feel bad. She really didn’t. But how could she pretend this didn’t affect her?

 

And then—almost without thinking, driven by the need to know, to understand —she asked: 

 

“How close were you two, exactly?”

 

Her voice was quieter now. Not harsh, not demanding. But it carried weight. Emotion.

 

The question had slipped out before she could stop herself, and now it just… hung there. Between them.

 

She wasn’t sure what kind of answer she wanted. Maybe she didn’t even want an answer. But it was too late now. All she could do was brace herself for whatever came next.

 

N glanced away again the second the question left her lips, his posture shrinking a little more into himself. His fingers fidgeted in his lap, picking absently at one of the creases in his hand, like the motion could somehow ground him—or maybe distract from the weight of what he was about to say.

 

There was guilt in his eyes.

 

Not the kind of guilt that came from betrayal, but more like regret. Like he knew how this would sound, and hated that he was the one saying it.

 

He spoke softly, “We… held hands, and stuff like that,” he admitted, each word careful, like it scraped his throat on the way out. “She was really sweet. Like, genuinely nice to me. I used to buy her little things. Just dumb stuff—flowers, candy. I don’t know. I liked making her smile.”

 

He paused, barely breathing, before continuing. “We went to one of the school dances together. We talked about dating, once. I think we almost did.”

 

Uzi felt her lips tighten into a flat line. The muscles in her jaw flexed slightly, a tiny, involuntary motion. She tried—really tried—not to let her expression show what she was feeling, but it was difficult.

 

Too difficult.

 

Something about hearing that made her feel like a pressure valve had gone off in her chest. It wasn’t anger, exactly, but something uncomfortably adjacent to it. Her thoughts spiraled faster than she could catch them.

 

He used to bring her gifts? Held her hand? Thought about dating her?

 

She hated that. She hated how vivid those words sounded in her mind.

 

And then came the next wave of guilt—at herself.

 

Why was this getting to her so much? Why did it matter? N wasn’t hers. He never promised anything. He was allowed to have history. Everyone had someone before… sometimes. That was normal. 

 

So why did it feel like someone had dropped a heavy stone on her chest?

 

Why did the idea of anyone else having meant that much to him make her stomach twist like this?

 

It wasn’t fair. Not to him. Not even to herself.

 

She dropped her gaze to her lap, clenching her fists tightly, trying to stop the flood of possessive thoughts.

 

This wasn’t healthy. She knew that. She needed to calm down, to listen . To hear the rest before she let her emotions run away with her again. Just because something hurt didn’t mean it was wrong. 

 

She breathed in—slow and deliberate—and tried to collect herself. Not to run. Not to snap. Just… let him talk. Let him finish

 

After a long pause, N shifted slightly beside her. He didn’t look at her directly—just turned his body a fraction toward her, like he was trying to find the courage without having to face the full weight of her gaze.

 

His voice came quieter now, like even saying it out loud felt uncertain.

 

“But… we never kissed, or anything like that,” he said hesitantly.

 

That made Uzi freeze.

 

The words struck her like static in her wiring.

 

She blinked, processing them—never kissed!? She almost said it aloud, but held back just in time, teeth pressing into her lower lip to stop the words from tumbling out. 

 

They had never kissed.

 

Not once, apparently.

 

But he had held that girl’s hand, bought her things, gone to dances with her—shared closeness, warmth, affection—but never that kind of intimacy.

 

That kind of vulnerability.

 

The same kind Uzi had shared with him.

 

Suddenly, her assumptions unraveled.

 

All this time since she found out, she'd imagined that other drone had been someone irreplaceable, someone who’d had every version of N Uzi thought she herself was seeing for the first time.

 

But if they hadn’t even kissed… then maybe—just maybe —he hadn’t felt about her the way Uzi feared. 

 

Maybe Uzi wasn’t a shadow of someone else.

 

Maybe she had been the first. The only one.

 

Her mind reeled.

 

It was almost too much. Too much relief, too much doubt, too much everything. The realization didn’t fix the ache in her chest, but it moved it—made it softer, more confused than angry. 

 

But still, doubt clung to the edges of her thoughts like oil to metal. Just because they hadn’t kissed didn’t mean he hadn’t thought about her. Maybe he still compared them in his head. Maybe Uzi was just a new name on an old shelf.

 

She didn’t know what to believe yet. The walls she’d built were still standing, even if a few bricks had started to loosen.

 

Her eyes flicked sideways to N. He was quiet again, his shoulders tense, like he was bracing for her response.

 

Uzi didn’t say anything for a moment, still processing all of this and trying to deny how she felt… But a small part of her—very small—had begun to thaw.

 

She blinked slowly, her mind finally catching up to what N had just said. She opened her mouth before she could stop herself, the only word she managed soft but marked with disbelief. “Seriously?”

 

It didn’t come out accusatory—there was no mockery or irritation in her tone. Just quiet surprise. Honest confusion. She wasn’t trying to trap him in anything. She genuinely hadn’t expected that answer.

 

N gave a small nod, but still didn’t look at her. His posture was slightly hunched now, his shoulders drawn up, like the weight of the whole conversation was settling in his joints. He was fidgeting with the seam of his sleeve—something nervous and absent-minded—and even without him saying anything else, Uzi could feel  the guilt hanging off him. Not guilt toward that girl… but guilt, maybe, just for being close to someone else before. Maybe because he could tell this was hurting her. That he still meant something to her.

 

Uzi stayed quiet for a moment, thoughts swimming in a hundred directions. She wasn’t sure how she was supposed to feel. Jealous? Relieved? She was definitely both.

 

But more than that, she was curious. She wanted to know. She needed to understand what actually happened—how it ended. Why it still lingered like something unspoken between them.

 

Her voice dropped slightly, not wanting to sound demanding, but still cutting through the silence.

 

“…So, what happened?”

 

She regretted it almost instantly—not because she didn’t want to hear the answer, but because of the way N responded.

 

His entire body stiffened like a pulled wire. He didn’t look at her. His hands froze where they had been fidgeting. His eyes dimmed slightly, and she could see it—he was working through something, dragging it forward like a memory he’d buried for too long.

 

The silence was thick, heavier than before. Long enough that Uzi almost pulled the question back.

 

But finally, in a voice that sounded like it had to crawl its way out of his throat, N answered.

 

“…It was late. Middle of the night, actually…”

 

He stopped there. Not because he was done, but because whatever came next was hard to say. Uzi could hear it in his voice—there was weight behind those words. Something happened that night, and just remembering it made his tone shift, his entire demeanor lock up.

 

And even though she didn’t know the full story yet… Uzi knew, just from how he said that, that it wasn’t something simple. Something casual. It was something that had left a scar.

 

And now, she was about to see it.

Notes:

Okay so I had 2 changes of plans

Was gonna post this chapter yesterday but got too busy 🙂‍↕️ but I’m posting it now so that’s good

The other thing is, I’m making this chapter way shorter than it was going to. Not because I cut anything out throughout it, but because I’m giving the next part its own full chapter. So even if this one was kinda short, ig it’s more of a setup chapter now? Like everything that happens/will be said during the rest of the bus ride will be in the next chapter, if that makes sense

Also if I didn’t do that I wouldn’t be able to post for another like few days but I didn’t wanna give yall nothing 😭🤚

But yeah anyways, if u couldn’t already tell, the next chapter is gonna be… a lot. So brace yourselves 😅

Also abt this chapter, Uzi is really pissing me off cuz like she’s *trying* her absolute hardest to be logical but then at the same time she’s like “b-b-but what if he doesn’t like me 🥺” GIRL GET OUTTA MY FACE why r u doubting him still 😭

My poor baby N is literally going through hell and back js so Uzi won’t leave him, telling her literally all of ts he probably hasn’t brought up in who *knows* how long, and is feeling even guiltier doing so js to make Uzi feel better?!

And like Uzi doesn’t even realize (to an extent) how irrational she’s being, upon being jealous asf and a bit possessive even?!?! At least she *kind of* acknowledges that 🥲

She seriously needs to stop bottling up her feelings… but who knows if she’s ever gonna do that 😒

Maybe it’ll be better in the next chapter who knows 🤷 might also get worse but again who knows, not me 🤷

ANYWAYSSS again sorry that this chapter was so short and I posted it late 😭

Next chapter should be posted Monday (probably) cuz again the next chapter will ACTUALLY be long and like I’ll also say dialogue heavy and overall js a LOT so yeah ☺️

See yall then!!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 86: Copperfield

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

N went quiet again, and then drew in a shaky breath—one that hitched at the end like he was trying to steady himself. His hands fidgeted at his lap, fingers twitching with nervous energy before he ran one of them up through his hair, pushing it back in a quick, absent motion. His posture shifted too—he sat straighter for a second, like he was preparing himself to say something that he had never said aloud before.

 

Then, slowly, his eyes found Uzi’s.

 

“Do you… remember what I told you about me being a disassembly drone?”

 

The question caught her off guard. Her eyes narrowed slightly, not in suspicion, but confusion. Her shoulders lifted just a bit in a vague shrug. “What about it?”

 

N’s expression tensed. His mouth pulled into a thin, uncomfortable line, and he looked down for a moment—like the words he needed were buried in the floor.

 

“Well… because of what I am,” he said quietly, “I… crave oil. I need it. To stay functional. I think I’ve told you that already, but…”

 

Something in Uzi’s chest stirred. Her brows furrowed, lips parting slightly in concern.

 

She wasn’t sure where he was going with this, but suddenly she didn’t like the direction it felt like it was heading.

 

N must’ve seen it in her face because he quickly held up both hands in a defensive, reassuring gesture. “No—don’t worry. I don’t—! I don’t kill anyone. I’m not like V or J. I swear—” 

 

His tone was rushed and insistent. There was an edge of desperation to it, like he needed her to believe him. He was practically pleading with his expression alone.

 

Uzi didn’t say anything right away. She was trying to process what he meant. Oil… survival… If he didn’t kill, then how—?

 

He looked away again, hands falling back into his lap as he fidgeted with his fingers, thumbs pressing together like he was trying to work through the guilt by touch alone.

 

“I’ll overheat,” he murmured. “If I don’t get oil, I’ll shut down. Burn out from the inside. But I just—” He stopped, his voice catching for a second before he forced it forward. “I can’t bring myself to hurt anyone. So… I steal. From oil banks. Supply trucks. Anywhere I can. I hate doing it, Uzi.” His voice cracked slightly near the end. 

He finally looked back at her, and there was something raw in his eyes. Honest shame. Like he was waiting to be hated for what he’d just admitted.

 

“I know it’s wrong,” he whispered. “I know there are drones who need that oil to survive. For transfusions. For repairs. But it’s either that… or I take it straight from someone. And I can’t do that. I won’t.”

 

Uzi stared at him, speechless for a second. He looked… devastated just having to say it out loud. And somehow, that only made her heart twist tighter. There was something terribly vulnerable about the way he said it—like he could barely bear with the burden of what he had to do to survive.

 

As she thought about it more… she blinked, but not in shock—just quiet interest. More than anything, she found herself… intrigued. The way N explained it, how he stole oil instead of hurting others—it was such a him thing to do. She could almost see it, too. The quiet desperation he must’ve carried with him, night after night, as he made choices no one else would ever have to think about. Choosing theft over violence. Quietly condemning himself just to keep others safe.

 

That sounded like a living hell—balancing on the edge of survival, constantly stealing just to keep himself from the brink of death, carrying that kind of guilt day after day, just because he refused to let himself become like the others.

 

He could’ve hurt someone. But he didn’t.

 

That choice alone made her chest feel heavy with something she couldn’t quite name—sympathy, yes, but also guilt.

 

Because how could she have thought, even for a second, that he wanted to lie to her? Or that he wanted to be some kind of monster? 

 

She didn’t say anything, though. Just… listened. She didn’t interrupt him. He was finally opening up. The least she could do was let him speak.

 

After a moment, N continued, his voice softer now. Not as shaky as before, but weighed down.

 

“Well… there’s more,” he said. “If I go too long without oil, I start to… go into a type of withdrawal.”

 

He shifted slightly in his seat, his eyes flickering down to his lap again. “It messes with my systems. My thoughts. But it’s not just physical. It’s like…” He paused, searching for the right words. “It’s like I’m still awake, but something else takes over. Like I’m watching myself from behind glass, and I can’t stop it. I can’t stop me.”

 

Uzi felt a chill trace down her spine. She didn’t know how else to describe it—it was that kind of quiet horror, the kind that settles in your circuitry. Her expression didn’t change much, but internally, something was shifting.

 

She could almost imagine it—N, glitching between what he wanted to do and what his instincts forced him to do. And somehow, that idea terrified her. 

 

He inhaled deeply, silently, his shoulders rising and falling in a slow rhythm. “Anyway… that night,” he continued, his voice now a bit hoarser than before, “I’d gone too long. The oil bank I used to hit had upgraded security—new locks, maybe a guard, I don’t know. I was trying to come up with a way around it, but by then…” He trailed off, his hands now clenched slightly in his lap. He didn’t look at her.

 

“…I wasn’t quite myself anymore.”

 

The way he said it—flat, but full of tension—made Uzi’s spark flicker uneasily.

 

And at that… Uzi finally began to realize this wasn’t just a story N wanted to tell to justify himself. It was something he had probably spent years trying not to relive

 

Uzi felt her core tightening the longer he spoke. Her fingers fidgeted against her sleeves, and her eyes stayed locked on N, even as every instinct in her told her she might not want to hear what came next.

 

Something about the tone of his voice—the way it was growing smaller, rougher, like he was forcing each word out—set off every internal warning light she had. He was unraveling something he hadn’t wanted anyone to see. And she was scared of what was buried there.

 

N exhaled shakily and lowered his head a little, his shoulders curled inward like he was trying to make himself smaller. “I didn’t even realize I had left my house,” he murmured. “I was just… walking. Watching drones out that late. I didn’t have a plan or anything—I just knew I needed oil. And that if I didn’t get it soon, I wasn’t gonna make it.”

 

He wasn’t looking at her anymore. He wasn’t even trying to meet her gaze. “I ended up in a bad part of town. You know the kind. Late-night wanderers. Some with friends, others just out on their own. I saw a kid, but—” He stopped himself, jaw tightening. “I couldn’t. I couldn’t do it.”

 

Uzi felt something cold crawl up her spine.

 

“But then… after a few hours, I was still just there. Right next to this alleyway. Trying to keep my systems from frying. Just watching.”

 

He shifted in his seat then, hands clenching faintly in his lap. His eyes flicked toward the window past her like he couldn’t bear to keep reliving it directly.

 

“And that’s when I saw him. A drone. Older. Looked kind of out of it. Messy, a little twitchy. Grocery bag in one arm, mostly junk—beer, cigarettes, that kind of thing. He kept looking over his shoulder like… like he thought someone was following him.” N paused again. His hands had gone still now, resting limp in his lap. But he didn’t look relaxed—if anything, he looked like he was holding his breath.

 

“I didn’t know what I was doing,” he said, his voice thinner now, close to breaking. “I wasn’t even me. I was overheating. It was all fog. I don’t even remember moving. One minute he was walking by the alley—next minute…”

 

His voice cracked.

 

“I had cornered him.”

 

The silence that followed was crushing.

 

N didn’t finish the sentence. He didn’t need  to.

 

He finally turned his head slightly, just enough to look down at the floor between them. “You can… probably guess the rest,” he said, barely above a whisper.

 

Uzi didn’t move. She didn’t know how  to move. Her processor buzzed, full of static.

 

She couldn’t feel anger. Couldn’t even summon fear. Just… stunned stillness.

 

She had come here to understand, but nothing could’ve prepared her for this. And yet, the part of her that had been so quick to judge—so eager to believe he was just like the others—was quiet now. Because this wasn’t a confession from a predator.

 

This was someone begging to still be seen as good.

 

Uzi ended up speaking before she really thought about the weight of her words.

 

“Did you… kill him?” Her voice was quiet, nearly a whisper, but the second the question left her mouth, she regretted it.

 

She watched N flinch—not just with his shoulders, but his entire posture stiffened like he’d been struck. He turned away from her sharply, his eyes angled down, and a long pause stretched between them. Then, without a word, he gave a small nod.

 

The gesture was subtle. Heavy. His head dipped lower, his expression folding inward with guilt, like he didn’t have the strength to speak the word aloud.

 

Uzi’s core sank.

 

This wasn’t just about jealousy anymore. It wasn’t even about the drone from before. Not really. What N was revealing wasn’t some romantic history to be angry over—it was something personal. Something painful. Something raw.

 

And he was only sharing it because of her.

 

That realization hit her like a brick.

 

He was telling her this story not because he wanted to, but because he was terrified of losing her. So terrified he’d rather relive one of the worst moments of his life than risk being misunderstood. He hadn’t even raised his voice when she was yelling at him earlier. He hadn’t fought back. He just took it. 

 

And still, here he was.

 

Uzi couldn’t believe how hard she had pushed him. She felt like a complete wreck—like she didn’t deserve this much effort from someone who had every right to walk away.

 

Before she could say anything, N broke the silence again.

 

His voice was hoarse, like he’d worn it down just to get these words out. “I didn’t even… realize it, at first. I just—when I came back to myself, he was already gone. And I was going to run. Just disappear before anyone saw me…”

 

He trailed off, lifting one hand and rubbing the side of his face, clearly trying to stay composed. His fingers trembled slightly.

 

“But then I heard a scream.”

 

That one sentence alone made Uzi go still.

 

N exhaled shakily, eyes still averted. “It was her.”

 

He didn’t need to specify. Uzi knew exactly who he meant.

 

The drone that was essentially the whole reason they were having this conversation right now. The one who had found out the truth the hard way. The story V had only barely hinted at, but now… now it was unfolding right in front of her, and Uzi didn’t feel anger or betrayal anymore.

 

She just felt the overwhelming weight of how much he must’ve carried—how deeply he must have hated himself—and how hard he must have tried, ever since, to be someone different.

 

And somehow, in the middle of all that… he still wanted her.

 

N’s voice was steadier than before, but just barely. “She didn’t recognize me at first,” he murmured, gaze low. “She just… froze. I think she was too shocked to process what she was looking at.”

 

Uzi stayed silent, her fingers fidgeting in her lap. She didn’t know what to say—not yet. She just watched him speak, her eyes searching his face for any sign of what he was really feeling.

 

“I was going to run,” he admitted. “I hoped she hadn’t seen clearly. That maybe I could just vanish before she really registered it was me.”

 

He paused.

 

“But then she said my name.”

 

That stopped her heart for a second. The way he said it—so quiet, so remorseful—Uzi could almost hear the echo of it. That moment, carved into his memory.

 

“She didn’t even have to ask what happened,” N went on. “She just… knew. I mean, I probably looked like some kind of monster. Claws out, oil all over my mouth…” A bitter laugh escaped him—short and self-deprecating. He exhaled hard and ran a hand through his hair. It wasn’t just shame. It was exhaustion. Like this moment had haunted him every single day since it happened.

 

Then he glanced at her.

 

Just for a second. Their eyes met—and Uzi saw everything in his expression. The guilt. The fear. The exhaustion. The regret.

 

But his eyes flicked away almost instantly, like even the weight of her gaze was too much. Uzi’s chest tightened.

 

He couldn’t even look at her.

 


A moment passed. Then another. And when he finally spoke again, his voice was even quieter. “At first, I wanted to say something. To explain. Or… anything. But what could I say? What could I possibly say?” 

 

He shook his head, shifting in his seat like he couldn’t get comfortable—like his own memories were making his skin crawl.

 

“I killed someone. And she saw me like that. Drinking oil from a body in the middle of an alley like some kind of…” he didn’t finish the thought, just clenched his jaw for a beat before going on.

 

“She ran. Of course she did. And I—I followed her.”

 

Uzi blinked, alarmed for half a second, but N was quick to clarify. “Not because I wanted to hurt her. I just—I just wanted to talk to her. To tell her it was an accident. That I wasn’t… I don’t know. That I didn’t want to be that. That I wasn’t trying to be.”

 

He rubbed his palms against his thighs, clearly reliving the frantic memory beat by beat. His voice strained with something close to desperation—like even now, after all this time, he still wasn’t sure how to justify what happened. “She ran down another alley and I chased her. I just… cornered her. I didn’t even think. I wasn’t trying to scare her, but I did, and that’s all that mattered.”

 

Uzi remained still, her mind racing. There was a twisting ache in her chest, a silent churn of regret and heartbreak. He wasn’t telling her this to make excuses. He wasn’t trying to manipulate her. He was just… trying to let her see what he had lived with. The weight of it. The horror of being seen like that.

 

And she had  judged him. Earlier today, she had thrown every ugly assumption she possibly could at him.

 

Now? Now she wasn’t even sure she had the right to feel anything except shame.

 

N’s mouth tightened into a hard, thin line as he kept going, the words barely more than breath. “She just… started yelling and cursing at me. Screaming. I tried to talk, to say something— anything—but she wouldn’t listen. She told me to get away from her. Called me a freak. A monster.”

 

Uzi’s jaw clenched slightly, but she didn’t speak. Her gaze lingered on him—watching the tension in his frame, the way his arms folded over himself like a barrier.

 

“I panicked,” he murmured. “I didn’t know what else to do. I—I grabbed her. I pinned her down and covered her mouth so she’d stop screaming.”

 

That made Uzi’s stomach turn—not because she feared him, but because of how much he clearly hated himself for it. His voice cracked slightly at the memory. 

 

“I wasn’t trying to hurt her,” he added quickly. “I just wanted her to stop… to let me talk. I wanted to explain—to beg , if I had to—but before I could get a single word out, she…” His voice trailed off again, his brows furrowing. 

 

“She pepper sprayed me,” he finished, quieter than before. “And then she ran.”

 

Uzi’s eyes flicked downward briefly, then back to his face. He wasn’t even looking at her—his gaze was fixed blankly at the back of the seat in front of them, arms still tightly crossed. One of his thumbs was moving slowly back and forth along his sleeve, a small, unconscious motion meant to steady himself.

 

It was that detail—something so small, so raw—that made the pit in Uzi’s stomach grow even deeper. She wanted to reach out, to do something —but her limbs felt locked, her guilt still weighing her down like concrete.

 

Another pause, and then N continued, softer now.

 

“I didn’t go after her after that. Not at school. Not anywhere. She wouldn’t even look at me. She never said a word to me again.” His tone wasn’t bitter—just hollow. Tired. As if he had already grieved that silence a hundred times over.

 

“I didn’t want to cause a scene… or scare her more than I already had. So I just… let her go.”

 

Uzi couldn’t bring herself to speak just yet.

 

She was still processing everything he’d said—how much he’d carried with him, how deeply that one night had affected him. It wasn't just guilt. It was shame. Loss. And it made her realize that maybe this hadn’t been about that other drone at all. 

 

It was about N. And again, how much he hated himself for what he was.

 

N kept his eyes low as he spoke again, voice quieter now, more reflective—like he wasn’t just telling a story, but reliving it in his mind.

 

“At first, I was terrified she’d say something. Go to a teacher, or the principal, or I don’t know… the authorities.” He gave a bitter little breath of a laugh, though it was entirely humorless. “I couldn’t figure out why she’d even been there that late. Why her .”

 

He paused, shifting in his seat. Uzi could see the tension in his shoulders as he trailed off, then tried to recover. “Later I found out through a friend… the guy I—” N stopped himself. The sentence hung in the air, incomplete, too heavy. He cleared his throat instead, pressing a hand to his chest like he could physically smooth down the mess of words caught there. “He was someone she paid. To get her stuff.”

 

He made a vague, uncomfortable motion with his hands—like the words themselves felt awkward to say aloud. “Alcohol. Cigarettes. Whatever she couldn’t get on her own. I didn’t even know she drank. Or maybe she was buying it for someone else, or a party. I don’t know.”

 

His hand dragged down his face, and Uzi could hear the quiet frustration bleeding into his tone— not  at her, not even at himself, but at the situation. How messy and out of his control it all was. “Not that it would’ve mattered,” he added after a moment. “Even if I’d known, I wouldn’t’ve cared. I wouldn’t’ve judged her.”

 

That part hit Uzi unexpectedly. Not because it was about the other drone—but because of the way he said it. The conviction. The sincerity.

 

He sighed, then leaned back slightly against the bus seat, as though the weight of the memory had physically worn him down. “I told V, though. That she found out. I freaked out and told her everything before I even had the chance to realize… she wasn’t going to tell anyone.”

 

Uzi stayed still, her eyes searching N’s expression—trying to read between the words. Trying to understand not just the story, but him.

 

“I mean… who would’ve believed her?” he asked softly, his voice thinning. “What was she going to say? That I killed a guy and drank his oil in the middle of an alley? Me, of all drones?” His he scoffed quietly in exasperation before his voice tightened again. His arms folded across himself once more. “And then she’d have to explain what she was doing there, too. Why she was out so late. And I don’t think… I don’t think she was supposed to be. She was definitely doing something she wasn’t allowed to.”

 

There was a long, heavy pause. N didn’t meet her eyes.

 

“So… in a way,” he said slowly, “I guess it worked out for me.”

 

Uzi sat there, stunned. Her thoughts scrambled.

 

The way he said it—it wasn’t boastful. It wasn’t cold. It was utterly exhausted. Like he hated that it had played in his favor. Like he wished someone would’ve believed her, even if it ruined him. 

 

And then on top of that… Uzi didn’t even feel angry anymore. Just hollowed out. Because he had carried all this in silence. Because she could see the toll it took. And because, deep down, she knew N wasn’t telling her any of this to be forgiven.

 

At this point, He just wanted her to know.

 

N’s words slowed. His voice, already soft, dropped further—low, steady, but clearly worn thin by the weight of what he was saying. “It was already too late, though…” he murmured, eyes dim. “Because I’d already told V.”

 

His expression shifted—his brows pinched just slightly, the corners of his mouth twitching down as if he regretted even bringing her into it.

 

“She didn’t mean anything by it,” he continued, shaking his head faintly. “She probably didn’t even know what to do with it. Maybe she thought J could help. Or maybe she just… didn’t think about what telling her might do.

 

He paused for one long, excruciating second.

 

“But it was a mistake,” he said, quieter now. “Because obviously J found out. And she—she confronted me about it. Told me if I didn’t fix it, if I didn’t deal with it, then she would.” 

 

He didn’t have to elaborate on what that meant.

 

Uzi’s eyes fell for a moment, gaze soft and distant. That part, she knew. At least V’s version of it—the sharp-edged, secondhand explanation from someone trying to sound unbothered by it. But hearing it from N —seeing the guilt that carved itself into his expression—was different. It wasn’t secondhand. This was what it had felt like to live through it. 

Her stomach turned. Was it worse that she had made him relive this because of jealousy ? Or that she’d pushed him into this confession just to ease her own insecurity ? Either way, it stung. 

 

N shifted again in his seat, pressing his hand to his knee like he needed something solid to hold onto. “We ended up fighting. Physically,” he admitted. “It got… bad.”

 

His eyes stayed fixed on the floor between his boots. “If we didn’t heal as fast as we do, one of us probably wouldn’t have made it out of that fight. I didn’t even recognize myself after that. After any of it…”

 

Uzi glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. The way his voice trembled wasn’t from fear—it was from shame. Shame he was still holding long after the bruises had faded.

 

He went quiet again for a few seconds, like he needed to piece together the rest.

 

“A week later, she moved away.”

 

He gave a breathy laugh, but there was no humor behind it. “Just like that. She was gone. J stopped caring after that. She didn’t have a reason to follow through anymore.”

 

His lips twitched, then flattened. “I never found out why she moved. Maybe it had nothing to do with me. Maybe her parents had something planned for a while and I just never knew.”

 

He looked out the window past Uzi and sighed. She noticed a slight tremble in his voice.

 

“I like to think it was something simple like that,” he said slowly. “That maybe I didn’t… push her to leave. That it wasn’t because of me. It probably wasn’t, but still…”

 

But he trailed off, like even he didn’t believe that. And for a moment longer, he just stared out at the fading cityscape beyond the glass—quiet, guarded, and guilty.

 

Uzi didn’t say anything at first. She couldn’t. Her throat felt tight. Her chest heavier than before. She had asked for this—for the truth. And now, hearing it laid out in full, she didn’t know if she felt better or worse.

 

But one thing was certain.

 

She understood now. And it hurt more than she thought it would.

 

A weighty silence pressed between them, thick and lingering. The air was heavy with everything N had just confessed, and Uzi sat with it—fidgeting, still tense.

 

Her gaze drifted downward, then back toward him. He hadn’t looked at her in a while. He was sitting with his shoulders drawn slightly inward, hands folded together loosely in his lap. It wasn’t closed-off so much as it was… exposed. Like he had given up his armor.

 

She bit her lip slightly, hesitating only briefly before quietly saying, “So… that’s everything?”

 

Her voice was soft—not cold or sarcastic, but edged with a kind of nervous restraint. Like she wasn’t sure if she even deserved the answer.

 

N gave a small, shallow nod. “Yeah,” he said after a moment. “That’s… about it.”

 

He still didn’t meet her eyes.

 

Then, more quietly: “I’ve never told anyone that before…”

 

Uzi blinked, surprised. She turned her head toward him more fully now, eyebrows knit slightly.

 

“Not even V,” he added. “She just… figured out the pieces on her own, I guess. But I never told her.”

 

Uzi felt her chest pull tighter. Her lips pressed into a line, and she stared down at her knees. Guilt scraped at her again, sharper this time—because of course he’d never shared this with anyone. He wasn’t the type to just talk about something like that. And yet she’d demanded it from him—worse, cornered him into it with her own insecurities. Threatened to walk away unless he gave her answers he clearly wasn’t ready to share. 

 

And he’d done it anyway.

 

He’d laid it all out for her, every broken part of it, every shame-laced detail. Just because she had asked.

 

Her fingers curled tightly in her lap. She wanted to say something. Anything. She wanted to look him in the eye and tell him she was sorry. That she hadn’t meant to make him relive that, or to push so hard, or to treat him like he was just some liar hiding secrets from her. She wanted him to know that she saw him now—not the version of him she’d painted in her own head, not the insecure assumptions she’d jumped to—but him

 

But she couldn’t.

 

Not here.

 

Not on a bus full of their classmates, sitting shoulder-to-shoulder in a place where she couldn’t even think straight without hearing the chatter and engine hum in the background.

 

And not now, not when vulnerability still felt like a brick wall in her throat.

 

So instead, she stayed quiet.

 

Not because she didn’t care. But because caring too much made it harder to speak at all.

 

Her fingers tightened against the hem of her sleeves, thoughts running a thousand different directions. What should she do, then? What should she say? She still couldn’t say what she really wanted to—but something else had been gnawing at her, lingering since the moment they had argued.

 

That one thing he’d said.

 

“Please don’t leave me. I–…I don’t have anyone else, Uzi. You’re all I have… I can’t lose you too— please, I can’t! ” 

 

That really stood out to her. What did he mean by that?


“You’re all I have.” 

 

She hadn’t understood it then, not really. And now, with the quiet between them drawing longer, heavier, she found herself clinging to that sentence.

 

She didn’t know what it meant. Not fully. But she needed to.

 

She drew in a shaky breath and glanced toward him. “Hey…” Her voice was softer than she intended, barely above the gentle hum of the bus. “Back at the museum… you said I was all you had—what did you mean by that…?”

 

Her words hovered awkwardly in the air between them.

 

N blinked, a small, visible flicker of confusion crossing his face. Like the memory had caught him off guard. But then his gaze shifted—just barely—and the faintest flicker of recognition passed over his features. He looked down at his hands.

 

A beat passed. Then another.

 

He shifted slightly in his seat—nothing dramatic, just a small, unconscious movement, like bracing himself against something.

 

“…Do you really wanna know?” he asked.

 

There was no sarcasm in his tone. No attempt to deflect or dodge. But there was no emotion in it, either—no warmth, no vulnerability. It was just flat. Empty.

 

And that was what made it so jarring.

 

Uzi froze, caught off guard by the sudden absence of feeling in his voice. She searched his face for something, anything, but he wouldn’t look at her. Not directly.

 

Still, she nodded. Not confidently, but enough.

 

“…Yeah,” she murmured. Her voice cracked slightly at the end, but she forced the word out anyway. “I do.”

 

And she meant it. Even if she wasn’t sure she was ready to hear the answer.

 

N shifted in his seat, sitting a little straighter, though he still wouldn’t meet her eyes. He tried—Uzi could tell. His head tilted toward her like he wanted to look at her, like it would make this easier, but he just couldn’t.

 

Instead, his gaze dropped to his hands again, where his fingers kept fidgeting—picking at the skin around his joints in anxious, repetitive motions.

 

“…I’ve mentioned my parents to you before,” he began, his voice low. “How they’re never around.”

 

Uzi said nothing, just listened, her expression unreadable.

 

“They’re always gone. Work trips, I think. I’m not even sure anymore.” He swallowed, and there was something tight in his throat, like the words themselves were hard to say. “They don’t really check in.”

 

His tone was still too even. Like he’d practiced saying this to himself enough times that the emotion got sanded down—but it was there,  just beneath the surface.

 

Uzi could see it in the way he kept pulling at the skin on his hands.

 

“My sister… she’s not around either. Not because she wants to be,” he said, his voice going quieter. “I’ve told you about it. I have to send her away. She can’t stay at home. It’s not safe for her. Not when she—”

 

He stopped abruptly, pressing his lips together hard like he’d said too much. Like it hurt to even hint at whatever was behind that sentence.

 

Uzi blinked slowly, her brow drawing inward.

 

N breathed in through his nose, seemingly steadying himself before continuing. “I had my grandma for a while,” he said, almost in a whisper. “She lived with us. Took care of me. She was always… there.”

 

His voice trailed off, and Uzi saw his jaw tighten. His face didn’t twist into a grimace, but his grief was clear in the way his shoulders curled in slightly, how his eyes grew glassy. That kind of pain didn’t need to be loud.

 

“She died a few years ago.”

 

Silence sat heavy between them. The bus around them hummed with obnoxious chatter and the faint whir of motion, but Uzi couldn’t hear it anymore. All she could focus on was him.

 

He exhaled slowly, and his tone shifted—more cautious now, more guarded.

 

“And then… there was her  for a while.”

 

Uzi didn’t need him to clarify. Her chest gave a faint twinge at the mention. But he didn’t dwell on it—not after everything he’d already confessed. He moved on quickly, like the weight of it wasn’t something he wanted to carry aloud.

 

“And V…” he added, voice softer now, his expression creased with hesitation. “She’s been pulling away. I don’t think it’s her fault. I think J’s just—getting in her head. And I know V. I know she still cares.”

 

He paused again. His next breath sounded a little more unsteady.

 

“…But it’s hard to believe that sometimes.”

 

His hands were still now, resting in his lap. His shoulders slumped, and his gaze drifted toward the floor. When N finally spoke again, his voice was softer—tentative—but there was something raw threading through it.

 

“I mean… on the bright side, I do have my other friends,” he murmured, almost like he was trying to remind himself. “I really do care about them. A lot. I’m lucky to have them.” He paused. Uzi glanced at him slightly. He looked like he was searching for the right words—hands loosely clasped, thumbs moving in slow circles, like he was stalling.

 

“But… it’s not the same.”

 

That was when he looked at her—really looked at her.

 

“Not like how it is with you.”

 

That caught Uzi completely off guard.

 

Her breath nearly hitched. His eyes locked with hers, wide and aching and full of so much weight she felt it hit her chest. She hadn’t expected that—hadn’t expected any of this. She was still reeling from everything he had already said. Sure, she’d known bits and pieces before—stories he had offered here and there, things she had picked up on. But hearing it all at once, strung together with nothing to soften the blow, made it so much realer

He wasn’t just lonely.

 

He was completely and utterly broken. 

 

“I thought…” His voice cracked faintly. “I thought I had you.”

 

His eyes shimmered now. She saw it—saw the way he blinked faster like he was trying to fight it back, but it was no use. “We’ve gotten so close,” he whispered, like even saying it hurt. “And I care about you. So much.”

 

Uzi’s heart twisted painfully in her chest.

 

“I’m sorry if I’m selfish,” he continued, his voice strained. “I’m sorry if I hurt you. And for all the horrible things I’ve done. I’m just—I’m trying, Uzi. I swear I’m trying.” 

 

His voice cracked fully then, and he looked away sharply.

 

I just don’t know what I’ll do if I lose you, too.”

 

His head tilted down slightly, and that was when she saw it—several quiet tears slipping down his cheeks. No sobs. No sound. Just tears, silent and trembling, and an expression so defeated it made something inside her fracture.

 

Uzi could barely process the wave of guilt that hit her. She wanted to speak—say something—but her throat tightened with so many tangled emotions she didn’t know which one to unravel first. Because now she wasn’t angry. She wasn’t jealous. She just felt awful. And she wished more than anything she could take back every word she said that had made him feel like this.

 

So, Uzi sat frozen in thought.

 

Her eyes stayed locked on N, though part of her wanted to look away—give him privacy, space, anything—but she couldn’t.

 

Not because she didn’t respect him. But because the sight of him, crumbling beside her, felt impossible to turn from. The tears still slid down his cheeks, quiet and unacknowledged, like he was trying to pretend they weren’t there.

 

And in that moment, Uzi had absolutely no idea what to do.

 

Should she say something? What would she even say? 

 

That she wasn’t going to leave him?

 

That she didn’t mean the things she’d screamed back in the museum?

 

That she knew he wasn’t selfish, or cruel, or any of the horrible things she'd accused him of? 

How could she expect him to believe her, after everything she’d thrown at him? She had cut him open with her words—called him a liar, accused him of caring only about himself—and now here he was, begging her not to leave him, with tears in his eyes and nothing left to give. 

 

And she couldn’t even bring herself to offer the one thing he probably needed most: an apology.

 

Her jaw tightened slightly, and her gaze dropped to her lap. A hundred conflicting thoughts tangled up in her head.

 

She wanted to reach for him. Say something. Anything that might ease the pain she’d helped put there.

 

But the words wouldn't come.

 

Apologizing—opening up like that—meant letting her own guard down. And Uzi didn’t know how to do that. Not here. Not now. Not in front of an entire bus of her classmates.

 

So she just… watched. Still. Silent.

 

And the longer she stared at N, the worse she felt. He didn’t even try to wipe his face. He wasn’t even pretending to hold himself together anymore. That was the worst part—seeing him like this, letting her see him like this.

 

She could feel something press against her chest, hot and painful. Guilt, yes, but something else too. Something deeper.

 

She wanted to help.

 

But she didn’t know how. Not with words, at least.

 

But what if… she reached for him and he pulled away?

 

What if he was like her, and the idea of someone touching him while he was in this much pain made it worse?

 

Whenever she had breakdowns like this, she didn’t want anyone even remotely near her. It overwhelmed her too much. That’s probably how he felt right now.

 

…Except for one time. In the library. When she was with him, breaking down and raw and vulnerable. Maybe not to this extent, she has been upset because she was so stressed about everything, and then confused on why he cared about her so much. And when she had finally let herself cry… she felt genuinely comforted in him just being near her, and even more so when he held her and let her cry. 

 

Would he feel like that?

 

He didn’t deserve her, though… not because she didn’t like him, but because she had treated him so, so horribly that he probably didn’t want to be near her.

 

Or did he?

 

She didn’t want to make things harder for him. But sitting here doing nothing felt unbearable too. So she lingered in a kind of terrified stillness—torn between reaching out and holding back—heart pounding as if her silence could somehow make this right.

 

But it couldn’t.

 

And she knew that.

 

So she did the only thing she could think to do.

 

Her fingers trembled slightly as she shifted in her seat, inching closer to him—slow, deliberate, careful not to startle him. It was barely a movement, but to her, it felt massive. Every part of her was coiled tight, afraid he’d recoil, or worse—freeze up and pretend like nothing was wrong.

 

But she didn’t pull back.

 

She simply lifted a hand, uncertain and tentative, and reached out toward him. She left a pause between them, a quiet offering. If he wanted to move away, he had every chance to do so.

 

But he didn’t.

 

Instead, without even a single ounce of hesitation, N leaned forward and wrapped his arms around her, holding her like he was afraid she might disappear. His face buried into her shoulder, and she felt it instantly—tears soaking into the fabric of her shirt, the tremble of his body pressed close to hers. It was instinctive, desperate.

 

Her body went still at first, one of her hands still reaching for him and her other arm frozen at her side. She hadn’t expected him to hug her—not like that. Not with so much force behind it. He was clutching her like she was the only thing anchoring him to reality.

 

It shattered her.

 

Slowly, her arms lifted and wrapped around him—carefully at first, then a bit tighter, letting herself lean into the embrace. She closed her eyes. Tried not to focus on the uncomfortable pressure in her chest, or the sound of him softly crying against her. It was too much. He was too much.

 

And then, in the faintest voice, so quiet she nearly missed it, he whispered—

 

Please don’t leave me.” 

 

Uzi’s chest caved.

 

The words hit her harder than anything else had. Not the yelling in the museum. Not the confession. Not even the guilt. That voice—barely a whisper, so fragile and raw—broke something inside of her. She had never seen him like this. Not even close. This wasn’t just sadness.

 

This was devastation.

 

How could someone who always smiled like an idiot… who always tried his best to be the brightest in the room… who was so uplifting to and caring about others—who didn’t even seem capable to be negative at times—be hurting this badly?

 

She wanted to comfort him further, but she had no words. No idea what to say, even if she tried.

 

So instead, she let her actions speak.

 

She shifted just slightly, enough to slip her left hand upward—then slowly, carefully, let her fingers slide into his hair. Her touch was hesitant at first, like she was testing the waters, unsure how he’d react. But when she felt no resistance from him, she began stroking gently through the strands—soft, repetitive motions meant only to soothe. Up and down. Again and again.

 

It was the same thing he had done for her before, when she had been stressed and needed comfort.

 

It had helped her. So maybe…

 

Maybe it could help him, too.

 

She stayed like that—her arm wrapped around him, her hand gently running through his hair, the fabric of her shirt growing heavier with every quiet tear he shed. Her own throat ached. Her eyes stung.

 

But she didn’t let herself cry.

 

Not right now.

 

Right now, this wasn’t about her.

 

Then, after just a few gentle passes of her hand through his hair, she felt it happen—his whole body loosened. The tension that had wrapped around his shoulders like wire slowly began to unravel. It was subtle, but noticeable. His posture softened, his breathing evened out just slightly, and he melted into her like she was the first bit of safety he’d found in days.

 

That alone made her chest tighten.

 

She hadn’t expected such a small gesture to have such a big impact… but maybe that’s exactly why it mattered.

 

Still holding him close, she finally found the words she’d been struggling to say earlier.

 

Quietly, she whispered into the space between them, “I don’t want to… even if it seemed like I did.”

 

The second those words left her, N reacted—not with more tears, but by hugging her tighter, nuzzling against her shoulder as if to bury himself in her reassurance. Like he needed to physically hold onto the truth of what she’d just said.

 

Uzi returned the embrace just as firmly, her hand still trailing slowly through his hair in the same soft motion.

 

Neither of them moved for a long moment.

 

Maybe a minute. Maybe two.

 

But eventually, she wanted to pull away.

 

Not because the closeness made her uncomfortable—it didn’t. Not at all. But she wanted to see his face. She wanted to know if he looked a little more okay than before. If he believed her. If that ache in his eyes had softened even a little.

 

So she shifted ever so slightly in the seat, hoping he’d take the hint.

 

He didn’t move.

 

“N…?” She murmured his name—softly at first.

 

Still nothing.

 

Uzi blinked, a bit puzzled, and then—gently—she poked him in the side.

 

That got his attention.

 

N stirred, shifting reluctantly, and only then did he start to loosen his hold. His arms unwound from around her with clear hesitation, and even as he pulled away, he lingered—like letting go was the hardest part of all.

 

When he finally sat back, he rubbed at his eyes with both hands, hiding behind his palms for a moment before quietly muttering, “Sorry…” His voice was hoarse, small.

 

Then, after a pause, he added with a tired, almost sheepish sigh, “I usually fall asleep after I cry like that.”

 

Uzi’s heart twisted. That sentence hit her in a place she didn’t expect.

 

How often did he cry like that…? Often enough to know his own habits, clearly. That thought made her frown slightly. He always acted so upbeat, so easygoing. Like nothing ever really got to him. 

 

But it clearly did.

 

And the fact that he’d learned how to console himself afterward… said more than he probably realized.

 

She didn’t say anything yet. Not because she didn’t want to, but because she didn’t trust her voice not to crack.

 

So, she decided to scoot just a little closer, her movements slow and cautious, as if afraid to startle him. Without letting herself overthink it, she raised her hands, reaching for him—carefully, like handling something fragile—and cupped his face with both palms.

 

N blinked, caught off guard at first, but didn’t flinch. In fact, he leaned in slightly, as though he was starved for the contact and didn’t even realize it until it was offered.

 

Her thumbs gently brushed along the angles of his jaw, then pushed aside a few strands of his bangs that had fallen over his eyes. He looked so tired. So worn. Her hands lingered there, cradling his face delicately as though grounding him in the present—keeping him here, with her.

 

She finally spoke, voice soft. “I hate seeing you like this.”

 

Her thumb began to move gently, stroking a faint, repetitive path along his cheekbone.

 

N’s lower lip quivered slightly, his brows pulling together, and for a second it looked like he might completely fall apart again. His voice cracked when he mumbled, “I’m sorry…”

 

Those two words hit her in the chest.

 

She shook her head a little and quickly whispered back, “Please don’t cry…”

 

Even as she said it, a single tear escaped from the corner of his eye, trailing slowly down his cheek. Without thinking, she wiped it away with her thumb, brushing it aside with the same reverent care she used to touch him everywhere else.

 

N let out a quiet, unsteady breath. Then, despite himself, he gave her a small, lopsided grin—the kind that came from somewhere in the middle of being comforted and feeling utterly overwhelmed.

 

“You’re making it hard not to,” he murmured, voice low and hoarse but threaded with the faintest trace of amusement.

 

Uzi blinked, unsure if he was teasing or being genuine. Her head tilted slightly. “Wait—am I… making you sad?”

 

As soon as the words left her, she regretted how uncertain they sounded.

 

But N’s expression changed instantly. His brief smile faded into something far more sincere, and he shook his head—not fast, but with firm certainty.

 

“No,” he said, quietly. “You don’t make me feel sad.”

 

Not you’re not making me sad. Just— you don’t. 

 

The wording wasn’t lost on her.

 

Her chest felt warm and tight all at once. It wasn’t a big smile that spread across her face, but something smaller, quieter—like the kind of relief that didn’t need words.

 

Her hands stayed where they were, her thumbs still brushing soft strokes along his skin, and her gaze dropped to the space between them.

 

Then she noticed the shift.

 

N leaned forward slowly, his movements so gentle she had time to brace for what she thought was coming. She held her breath—was he about to kiss her?

 

But instead, he lowered his head and rested his chin on top of hers, pulling her into a new embrace.

 

Uzi blinked once, surprised—but then melted into the hug without hesitation. Her arms slipped around him again, and she let her head rest comfortably beneath his.

 

Neither of them said anything. There was no need to.

 

They stayed like that—tangled together in silence—as the rest of the world moved on without them.

Notes:

Holy fuck that took so long to write and edit 😣

Hope it was worth it 😭 I think it was 🥲

I don’t really have much to say in this author’s notes tbh

Js what did yall think of this? I wanna hear y’all’s thoughts 😈

The next chapter should be posted Thursday or Friday. I’ve been super busy recently so that’s why the updates are kinda slow, but I’ve been trying to give yall longer chapters to make up for it- hope this one was long enough too 😭

That’s all I have to say, I think. If I need to add anything else I’ll edit it in later. Byeee!!!

EDIT: okay actually I do have something else to say 😭 - I think I’ve mentioned before that I’ve noticed that when I italicize words for some reason it usually adds a double space after it, and it really pisses me off. I’ve been trying to go back and edit previous chapters to fix it all and whatever. Rn though for this one, icl I don’t feel like fixing it at the time of posting cuz I’m tired, so I’ll fix it tomorrow probably. Just wanted to let yall know, sorry abt that 😭💔

EDIT #2 (7/18/25): okay so change of plans- I’ve been super busy today so I don’t have time to post. But will for sure post tomorrow- I have more than half of the chapter written and js need to finish and edit it, so everything should be done tomorrow!!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 87: Coiling

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

A few moments after the bus doors swung open, Uzi and N found themselves drifting into the hotel’s main lobby along with the other students.

 

The field trip guide made a few announcements—a part of Uzi’s brain noted the mention of lunch being served just across the lobby, but the rest blurred into the background. Her mind was replaying every moment of the bus ride, back to everything N had said, their embrace, her heart pounding as they held each other.

 

Still, when the guide said something about how, “Lunch is in the dining area—same place they serve breakfast,” she perked up just enough to register it.

 

Soon after his announcements, the drones in the room began to scatter, heading in every which direction. Uzi could assume some were going to get lunch some place else, while others were probably going to just mess around with their friends. The minority of drones headed into the dining area—which wasn’t necessarily a bad thing to Uzi. At least the noise in there won’t be overwhelming…

 

At some point at their time in the lobby, Uzi and N ran into their group. Uzi was relieved, because she had started to feel the tension of walking by N coiling within herself like a wire. The two of them had been almost completely silent when they walked into the hotel, and Uzi wasn’t too sure why.

 

The whole time, she was thinking about what the right thing to say would be, or when the right time was to say it, but she hadn’t seemed to been able to find it… which was frustrating. After everything that just happened, she couldn’t even think of something to say to him!? Anything would’ve sufficed, but she just couldn’t find the words.

 

Maybe N was having a similar issue, as she noticed N didn’t seem to have much to say either. There was one point where they had been walking and both looked at one another at the same time, before quickly looking away. Uzi felt her face burning in embarrassment at just recalling the moment…

 

Regardless, now they were with their group. They had all greeted each other like normal, and Rebecca even started talking to N, which made Uzi feel even more relieved. Now she wouldn’t have to worry about what to say to N… in the meantime.

 

The group began walking toward the dining area after debating briefly what to do next. They all collectively decided it’d be better to save their money than go out for lunch again.

 

There was a small lunch buffet set up, where everyone served themselves, before they went to go find somewhere to sit. When they reached the circular tables in the dining room, the group claimed a spot of their own. Lucky for them, the table contained six chairs—one to fit each one of them.

 

At first, though, Uzi stood awkwardly beside the table, arms stiff at her sides. The others had already started settling in, scraping chairs against the carpet as they picked their spots.

 

Her eyes flicked briefly to N, who was still standing too—uncertain, maybe waiting for her to make the first move. She wanted to sit by him—of course she did—but she wasn’t sure if he wanted the same. After everything that had just happened, was it too much? Too soon?

 

Her mind twisted itself into knots, her fingers twitching like she might reach out to him and then hesitating again. What if she sat beside him and it was awkward? And worse, what if someone noticed? 

 

Before she could spiral further, Thad’s voice cut in.

 

"Yo, Uzi," he said, grinning like a kid who knew he was about to say something dumb. "You wanna sit next to the coolest drone at the table?"

 

Uzi turned toward him, already feeling a reluctant smile threatening the corner of her mouth. Thad was slouched in his chair with that ever-present backwards cap tilted just a little too far to the side, and he looked way too pleased with himself.

 

She squinted at him and crossed her arms. "I’d rather not catch cooties, thanks."

 

Thad blinked. “Cooties? Really?” He scoffed, mock offended. “I don’t have cooties. You’re the one that probably does.”

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed into a glare. "Do you think insulting me is going to convince me to sit next to you?"

 

Thad leaned back with a shrug, hands up in a ‘just saying’ gesture, “Hey, I’m just stating the obvious.”

 

That earned him a short glare before Uzi strode over, grabbed the brim of his backwards hat, and flicked it forward so it smacked down over his eyes.

 

"Hey—!" Thad flinched, fumbling to shove the cap back into place as she plopped into the seat beside him.

 

Uzi sat back with a huff, folding her arms with exaggerated smugness. But the tension in her chest had eased slightly. The silly back-and-forth had helped take the edge off her overthinking, even if just a little.

 

She caught a glance of N across the table—he hadn’t sat yet, but his eyes lingered on her for a second longer than usual. She quickly looked away, pretending to focus on something else, her heart picking up again.

 

As Uzi settled into the seat beside Thad, she doesn’t really register that the chair to her left is empty. She didn’t even glance when she heard the scrape of another chair pulling back beside her, assuming it was probably Emily or Rebecca.

 

It wasn’t until she caught sight of both of them—Emily taking a seat beside Rebecca, while Rebecca was already sitting by Darren, who was beside Thad—that it clicked—and her shoulders tensed the moment she realized it was N.

 

Her heart gave a faint jolt.

 

She kept her gaze straight ahead, suddenly hyperaware of the closeness between them.

 

She didn’t flinch or shift away, but she had to silently will herself to breathe. Just breathe. It’s fine. It’s just N.

 

But that was the problem.

 

It was N.

 

And nothing about this felt simple anymore.

 

She wasn’t mad at him. Not anymore. She couldn’t be. Not after everything he’d told her, with his voice cracking and his hands trembling and his eyes brimming with tears he couldn’t stop from spilling.

 

She’d never seen him like that—never even imagined he could fall apart that way. She hadn’t even known he had that kind of sadness in him.

 

And the worst part was… she still couldn’t fully wrap her head around what he’d said. That he’d killed someone. She’d guessed it before—assumed it, because of what he was —but she’d kept it buried beneath layers of denial. She’d never wanted to think about it. Not really.

 

But hearing it from him, in his own voice, seeing how broken it made him—how it still  made him—it changed everything.

 

And the way he talked about it… it was clear he hadn’t wanted to do it. That it haunted him. That unlike J and V, he didn’t take any satisfaction in it. That he didn’t even see himself as a killer.

 

That should’ve brought her some kind of peace, right?


Then why did her chest still feel so tight?

 

Maybe it wasn’t him she was upset with.

 

Maybe she was upset with herself.

 

Because in that moment, in that stupid, awful moment back at the museum, she’d made him feel like she was just going to walk away. Like he didn’t matter to her.

 

And he did.

 

More than she wanted to admit, maybe.

 

The thought made her stomach twist.

 

He’d said he felt alone. Like no one cared. Like everyone just left. And then she’d gone and made him feel like she was about to do the same.

 

The shame of that weighed heavy in her limbs.

 

She didn’t know what to say to him now. Not here, in front of everyone. But just sitting beside him again felt like the smallest way to start. She just hoped he felt it too.

 

Uzi stared blankly at the table, her food untouched, thoughts turning over themselves like gears grinding too tightly.

 

Every time she thought about N—what he’d said, what he’d done—it made her chest ache.

 

How had she gotten so lucky to have someone like him in her life? He was gentle, thoughtful, selfless in a way she wasn’t sure she even understood. He had been there for her—over and over again. He didn’t just listen. He cared. He noticed when she was upset. He offered comfort when she pushed others away. He said he’d step between her and J without hesitation, promise d to protect her, even though it would put him in danger.

 

He had saved her life. Literally.

 

Back when V had attacked her, back at the school the night she had initially found out about everything—he had fought her off. He had chosen Uzi.

 

And what had she done in return?

 

She’d taken him for granted. She hadn’t listened to his feelings. She let her fear and doubt cloud the way she saw him. And when he was vulnerable, when he told her he practically begged her not to leave, she nearly made it worse.

 

A frown pulled unconsciously at her face. Her brows knit slightly, her gaze dim and distant.

 

Then—

 

A sudden jab to her cheek jolted her back.

 

She smacked the hand away with a glare, turning to find Thad looking far too smug for his own good. His lopsided grin stretched even wider.

 

“Why the long face?” he asked in a tone that was way too cheerful for how annoyed she suddenly felt.

 

Uzi gave him a tired look. “What—?” she muttered, then narrowed her eyes and added, “Okay, wait—don’t ever do that again.”

 

Thad just shrugged, ignoring her comment and seeming totally unfazed. “You were frowning.”

 

Her glare deepened. Crap.

 

Had she really been that obvious? She hadn’t even noticed she was doing it… She must’ve been so caught up in her head that her expression betrayed her.

 

Embarrassed, for the briefest of moments she turned her gaze back toward her food and gave a short exhale through her nose. She didn’t respond to Thad right away—just sat there, mildly stewing in the quiet realization that she wasn’t hiding things nearly as well as she thought.

 

She thought quickly about what she could say, but before Uzi could muster any sort of comeback to Thad’s observation, his expression shifted. His ever-present grin faded just a little, replaced by something far more sincere. He tilted his head slightly, his voice quieter this time.

 

“So, what’s up?” he asked.

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard. There was no teasing in his tone, no smugness in his face—just genuine concern. And that alone was enough to confuse her.

 

Wait… was he being serious?

 

Weird. Really weird. Thad wasn’t the type to drop the jokes and just ask something like that.

 

She decided not to let him see how that threw her off.

 

“The ceiling,” she deadpanned.

 

Thad stared at her blankly for a beat before realization hit him. He let out a dramatic exhale and gave her a flat look, unimpressed by her deflection.

 

Just as he was opening his mouth to no doubt give her grief about it, Uzi quickly cut him off. “Seriously though,” she said dryly, “if you ever poke me in the face again like that, I’m putting a hit out on you.”

 

Thad gasped theatrically, placing a hand over his chest like he’d just been personally wounded. “You wouldn’t,” he said with mock devastation. “What would you ever do without me?”

 

Uzi raised a brow, ready to hit back with another sarcastic remark, but before she could, Emily’s voice broke through the table chatter.

 

“So,” she said, glancing around at everyone, “what was everyone’s favorite part of the museum?”

 

Uzi momentarily turned toward her, but not before narrowing her eyes sharply at Thad. She lifted two fingers and pointed them at her eyes, then aimed them squarely at him in the universal I’m watching you’ motion.

 

Thad gave a scoff, shaking his head with a crooked grin as he leaned back in his chair, arms loosely folded. He didn’t say anything else—but the amused look he gave her said he was far from done teasing her.

 

Despite herself, Uzi felt a small flicker of warmth push through the stress. Thad might’ve been annoying, but… it was nice to see that he seemed to care about her.

 

But, then again. at the same time… it really threw her off. Not because she thought Thad was heartless, but because why was he suddenly being like this with her? They had always been close—or, well, they had been close in middle school, lost contact for a few years, and then pretty much just picked up where they left off a few months ago. By now, though, she felt like she would’ve noticed if he had been acting like this around her. Since they first reconnected, if he was serious every now and then, it wouldn’t seem so weird like it did now.

 

Wait—weird didn’t seem like the right word. It was more like… jarring. She hadn’t thought about it too much until now, just subtly picking up on it, but now that she actually thought about it… it didn’t seem so casual that every time he had the chance, it seemed like he seriously wanted to spend time with her. And seriously cared about anything associated with her.

 

That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing at all itself, because that’s what friends are for, right? Having company and spending time together, talking, joking, bantering, and just overall having fun. She liked spending time with him too, don’t her wrong. But it was just the way he went about it.

 

He asked to sit with her on the bus ride to the hotel, which wasn’t ‘weird’ until she told him she was already planning on sitting with N. The expression he made bothered her enough to promise to sit with him on the way back.

 

Then, when they got to the hotel, everything was normal until after the main field trip guides announcements. She stayed downstairs with N because N was filling her in on all the things she hadn’t heard, but when everyone else in their group left and Uzi and N stayed behind, Thad seemed awfully concerned about what N was doing, even asking him why he wasn’t following him back to his room. 

 

That also shouldn’t have been weird—he was probably just curious. But it was just the mere face Thad made when he looked at N after N told him he was staying with Uzi, and even the way he walked off, that seriously stood out to her. It was the same face he made back at the bus the previous moving when Uzi said she was sitting with N…

 

And then at the café nothing seemed odd, other than the fact that he rushed to her between Uzi and N. Was that on purpose…? It couldn’t have been. Did Thad even have enough brain cells to seriously think that through?

 

All jokes aside… the main thing that had been bothering her was what happened earlier at the museum. When Thad walked between her and N during the confrontation. He even seemed… protective? of Uzi, even indirectly threatening N that if he was bothering Uzi he was bothering him.

 

Seriously, what is up with this guy?

 

Normally she’d write it off as all just a strange coincidence, but at this point she wasn’t sure if she could convince herself anymore…

 

Her thoughts were abruptly cut short when Thad spoke up. He was the first to chime in when Emily posed her question, leaning forward slightly with a spark of excitement that he didn’t bother to hide—at least at first.

 

“I thought the dinosaur exhibit was awesome,” he said, eyes bright. “It wasn’t huge or anything, but they had a fossil from one of my favorite species—you know, the one with the—”

 

He stopped abruptly, like a switch had flipped. His posture shifted as if he suddenly remembered he had an image to uphold. He leaned back in his seat, arms crossed loosely, expression neutral.

 

“—I mean, it was whatever, I guess,” he said, voice flatter now. “The rest of it was boring…” he muttered, trailing off.

 

Uzi glanced at him, her lips twitching at the contrast. The sudden backpedal from passionate to indifferent was so perfectly Thad it nearly broke her composure. Even after her spiraling thoughts about him, he never ceased to amuse her.

 

She debated tossing a sarcastic jab his way but decided to let it slide—mostly because Darren spoke up next.

 

“I actually liked the war exhibits,” Darren said, his voice steady, though he fidgeted slightly with his sleeve. “But, uh… those full-sized drone models kind of creeped me out.”

 

Emily tilted her head and furrowed her brow. “Creeped you out? Why?”

 

Before Darren could answer, Rebecca leaned forward with an amused glint in her eye. “He has a serious fear of mannequins.”

 

Darren’s face twisted into surprise, then mild horror. “What? No I don’t!” he insisted, sitting up straighter as if that would make his denial more convincing. “She doesn’t know what she’s talking about.”

 

Rebecca only smiled wider. “You almost had a panic attack backstage at the school theater last year. There was a mannequin in the dark and you practically ran out of the room screaming.” She stifled a laugh as she finished speaking.

 

Uzi caught Darren’s glance shift awkwardly to the table, then to Emily, who was watching him with a mildly curious expression.

 

He laughed loudly, which was very obvious quick and forced. “Annnyways,” he said, brushing off Rebecca’s comment as fast as possible, “what about you? What was your favorite?” 

 

His eyes flicked to Emily, clearly hoping to redirect attention before she had time to dwell on the mannequin story.

 

Emily perked up, “Oh, that’s easy. My favorite exhibit by far was the—“

 

Emily’s voice faded into the background the moment Uzi felt something brush against her hand—something warm and careful.

 

Without turning her head, she shifted her eyes to the left, already guessing who it was. Sure enough, it was N. His hand was now quietly wrapped around hers, his thumb beginning to trace soft, slow strokes along the back of it. The contact was gentle—almost timid—but it sent a jolt straight through her.

 

Her entire body stiffened for a second, her systems catching up to what was happening. He was holding her hand. In front of everyone.

 

She didn’t move.

 

Couldn’t.

 

Her eyes remained fixed on him, and she noticed the small, sheepish smile on his face, uncertain but undeniably sweet. He didn’t look at her right away, and part of her wondered if this was something he’d thought about doing or if it had just… happened. Spur of the moment. Emotion driving instinct.

 

When she didn’t respond right away, his movements faltered. The slow motion of his thumb stopped. Hesitation flickered across his features—his smile dimmed, and his eyes briefly dropped down. He looked like he was about to retreat, to take it all back.

 

But before he could, Uzi made a choice.

 

Her fingers shifted, curling gently around his. Not gripping tight—just… holding. Affirming. She didn’t look directly at him at first, but she could sense the shift in his posture, the subtle spark of hope that returned to his expression. His gaze slid back to her, more cautious now, almost waiting for her to change her mind.

 

She met his eyes for only a second and gave the tiniest nod—barely a movement, but enough to say it’s okay.

 

N’s smile softened again, and he resumed what he had been doing: tracing gentle arcs across her knuckles with his thumb, slow and steady. It was calming in a way that made her nerves feel impossibly tangled.

 

Uzi tried to keep her expression neutral, glancing forward like she was still part of the conversation at the table, but her mind was a storm of flustered thoughts. What was he thinking?! Everyone was right here. Someone could look down at any second and see.

 

But then she remembered the tablecloth—it draped down just enough to hide their hands from view. No one would notice unless they were being really nosy. Still, the idea that N was bold enough to try this, right now, threw her completely off balance.

 

…And yet… she wasn’t pulling away.

 

She didn’t want to.

 

Her heart was thudding louder than it had any right to, and her face felt way too warm.

 

But underneath all the nerves, there was something else. Something quieter.

 

She liked this.

 

And she couldn’t bring herself to stop it.

 

Uzi stole another glance at N, trying to read between the lines of his expression—quiet, still slightly unsure, but soft. His posture was relaxed, his gaze mostly lowered toward the table as if nothing unusual was happening, but the way his thumb continued tracing gentle, rhythmic motions across the back of her hand betrayed his focus. He wasn’t distracted. He was fully aware  of what he was doing.

 

And every pass of his thumb sent a quiet jolt through her system, like a static charge she couldn’t shake. Still, she forced her expression to remain steady—lips neutral, eyes only occasionally darting his way. No one could know. No one could see . The warmth in her face was already difficult enough to manage.

 

She didn’t understand why he was being so bold right now. He wasn’t usually the one to make the first move like this—not when it came to physical contact, unless it was a hug. Sure, she had reached for his hand before, on the bus a while back, but that was different. No one could see, or it’d be really hard for them too. During that quiet moment, it had just been the two of them. It was private. It was safe. And any other things she had done with him had been in an actual private spot with no one else, excluding the two times on the bus… but again, that was different. 

 

But here… they were sitting at a table with all their friends. The room buzzed with conversation and laughter. Any of them could glance under the table at the wrong time. What if some dropped a fork or something and had to pick it up?!

 

Just… w hy now?

 

And then, the thought hit her. Maybe he needed this. Maybe it wasn’t boldness—maybe it was a quiet plea for comfort. A reassurance that she wasn’t still angry. That she still cared. After what happened on the bus… how she’d pulled away… the way she had made him feel like he might lose her, even if she hadn’t meant to—maybe this was him reaching out, both literally and figuratively, hoping she’d still be there on the other end.

 

In truth, she couldn’t blame him.

 

Because, in a way, she needed it too. Some tiny gesture to tether her thoughts, ground her in something real. Even if it made her nervous… even if her face felt like it was overheating.

 

So, slowly, subtly, she returned the gesture.

 

Her fingers squeezed his—just once, soft and sure.

 

And the response was immediate.

 

N squeezed her hand back, the pressure feather-light but steady, and she saw him glance her way out of the corner of his eye. When their gazes almost met, he gave her the smallest smile. Quiet. Genuine. A flicker of warmth that made her chest twist and her thoughts scatter like startled birds.

 

Great. Now her face felt like it might melt right off.

 

-

 

Uzi wasn’t sure how much time had slipped by—maybe minutes, maybe longer—but it blurred together into a strange, suspended moment.

 

Ever since N had reached for her hand under the table, nothing around her had felt quite real. The others talked. Laughed. Passed comments back and forth like nothing had changed. But Uzi could barely keep up with the thread of the conversation, the voices becoming little more than background noise to the persistent awareness of N’s hand in hers.

 

He hadn’t let go. Not once.

 

The warmth between their palms had long stopped being subtle. Their hands were practically glued together at this point, both of them clammy, yet neither making a move to pull away.

 

Uzi kept telling herself she should—at the very least, to shift or dry her palm or give him the space to—but the thought of how he might take it made her hesitate every time. She didn’t want him to think she was backing away again. Not after what she had put him through earlier.

 

But more than that… she didn’t want to let go.

 

Even with the warmth becoming borderline uncomfortable, the feel of his hand around hers was anchoring her in a strange, gentle way. She was still uncertain about a lot—how she felt, what came next—but she wasn’t uncertain about this. Not right now.

 

Still, a moment almost shattered it.

 

She felt eyes on her—subtle, but focused. And when she glanced up, she caught Thad looking at her from beside her, brow furrowed in vague suspicion. He wasn’t looking at N, not directly. But he was definitely looking at her.  Studying her like she was off somehow.

 

Uzi stiffened instinctively, her hand almost pulling away out of pure panic. But instead, she covered it by locking eyes with Thad and snapping, “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”

 

That snapped him out of it. He blinked, startled, before giving a sheepish laugh and scratching the back of his head. “Sorry, zoned out.”

 

“Yeah, clearly,” Uzi shot back, her tone sharp but not too sharp—playful, if a little edged. She arched a brow and added something snarky about his attention span, drawing a chuckle or two from the others.

 

Thad laughed along with it, and the moment passed. But the way he had looked at her… it didn’t sit right. Not completely. He hadn’t said anything, hadn’t even looked under the table, but something in his expression told her he could feel something was different. He didn’t know what, not yet. But he was watching. And considering everything she was thinking about earlier, maybe there was something deeper behind why he was looking at her like that…

 

Uzi tried to shake it off. She’d worry about that later. Right now, N’s hand was still wrapped around hers, his thumb resting still against her skin, and she wasn’t ready to let that go—not for anything.

 

-

 

The rest of the afternoon drifted by in a quiet haze. Their group stuck together—laughing, exploring, talking about exhibits and snacks and whatever came to mind—but for Uzi, the warmth that had settled under her skin at the hotel table never really faded. And yet, despite that earlier intimacy, things between her and N had gone strangely quiet.

 

Not in a bad way. Just… quieter than she expected.

 

He didn’t avoid her or act strange, but he didn’t go out of his way to talk to her either—not unless there was a reason to. Not unless someone else was involved in the conversation. At first, it left her feeling uncertain, like she’d missed a signal. Had she squeezed his hand wrong? Was he rethinking what happened?

 

But then she’d catch him looking at her.

 

She’d glance up mid-conversation, or while walking between stops, and N’s eyes would be on her—soft, unreadable, like he was lost in thought. She could only hold his gaze for a second or two before she had to look away, her chest tightening in that stupid fluttery way that annoyed her more than she’d admit. He wasn’t ignoring her. Far from it.

 

He was just… watching her. Quietly. Carefully. And if she was being honest with herself, she’d been doing the same thing.

 

Multiple times, she realized she had been staring at him—just because. No reason, no prompt. She’d catch herself mid-thought, eyes resting on the shape of his face, the movement of his hands, the small smile he gave someone else—and she’d snap herself out of it, pretending like she was thinking about something else the whole time. He never caught her. Or maybe he had, and just didn’t say anything.

 

Either way, the silence between them felt more like mutual hesitation than distance. Like both of them wanted to say something but didn’t know where to start.

 

When evening rolled around and they all returned to the hotel, it didn’t feel like a goodbye so much as a pause. The group walked together down the hallway—some still talking, others tired and dragging their feet—and Uzi found herself trailing a few steps behind, her gaze flicking to N.

 

He was walking next to Thad, who apparently was his roommate for the trip. That complicated things. She had wanted to say something—anything—to N before they parted for the night. Even a quiet, “Hey, are you alright?” or “Thanks for earlier. I needed that.” Or maybe she could even apologize for everything. It had been on the back of her mind since she got off of the bus, but it was like her brain was consciously ignoring the idea. But the presence of Thad complicated all of that. Especially considering what happened earlier, when Thad had seen them arguing at the museum and stepped in—literally—between them.

 

Now that she thought about it, Thad hadn’t really spoken to N since they got back to the hotel, unless he absolutely had to. But Uzi could tell there was something more strained behind that than him just not knowing what to say, like how it was between herself and N.

 

Thinking about all of that made Uzi wince inwardly. She didn’t want to reopen that weird tension between Thad and N. Or draw more attention to anything that might give Thad the wrong impression.

 

So she said nothing.

 

Just walked silently until they all reached their rooms and exchanged tired goodnights. Her hand twitched slightly, like it wanted to do something—reach out, touch N’s arm, get one last second of contact—but she didn’t let herself. She watched him go with Thad, trying to read anything in his expression. But there was nothing obvious. Just that small, soft smile he always seemed to carry when he wasn’t thinking too hard.

 

Now she stood outside the room she shared with J, nerves twisting uneasily in her chest.

 

It wasn’t J she was worried entirely about—though that would’ve been reason enough. It was more about V. If she was in there, maybe Uzi could talk to her. Maybe. She’d thought about it ever since the bus… maybe she could confide a little about what happened. About N. About the museum. About everything she found out about, to an extent.

 

If only she could work up the nerve…

 

Taking a breath, Uzi reached for the door handle.

Notes:

Sorry for posting late, I’ve been so busy ugh 😒

I’m actually on vacation rn for a week visiting family and I had to go on an 8 hour car ride to get here 😭

Anyways, much more importantly, abt the chapter. icl at all, to be completely honest this chapter was kinda js for pacing. Like, I’m super excited for the next part and would’ve loved to js start there, but I needed to write some sort of in between then and now right?? It only makes sense

So this is kinda like an overview more than anything. Normally I’d go more in depth, but I don’t really have a reason to.

Also again icl, I js think I’m so excited to write the next two chapters that I didn’t want to have more than one in between. I’m not gonna give *anything* away abt it, or like, okay I’ll give one thing since it may take me a bit to post. It’s gonna take place the night between this day and the next, there’s not js gonna be a time skip to the next day. And alsoooo the paranoia question is gonna be brought up, for anyone who remembers that 🥲

BUT THAT’S IT I can’t say anymore I’ve reveled too much 😶‍🌫️

Abt when the next chapter(s?) will be posted, if I can’t get around to it this week it’ll be at the latest next Monday or Tuesday. But I really wanna post so if I find time I’ll write it out and post it.

And also the next chapter is gonna be *kind of* short, followed by a really long and detailed chapter. I’ll say that.

So yeah super excited. Sorry abt the shitty posting schedule, it’ll get better soon.

Chapter 88: Guess

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

By the time Uzi had stepped into the hotel room, whatever motivation she’d had to talk to V had fizzled fast.

 

The moment she opened the door, she was met with chatter—J’s voice front and center, casually loud and all too comfortable, as she and V exchanged remarks about something that sounded vaguely like gossip. Lizzy chimed in too from across the room, her laugh a bit too shrill for Uzi’s patience.

 

It wasn’t that she didn’t want to talk to V—it was that she couldn’t. Not with J sitting there, sharp and observant, and definitely not when she was already on edge about everything that had happened.

 

Even if V noticed her walking in, there was no space to pull her aside, no excuse that wouldn’t have felt suspicious. The whole situation felt too boxed in, too inconvenient, and it left Uzi silently fuming.

 

So she gave up.

 

She got ready for bed with tight movements and a heavy sigh, changing clothes and brushing her fingers through her tangled hair before practically throwing herself into bed, blanket twisted beneath her. The tension didn’t leave her—not when she hit the pillow, not when the lights finally went out, and definitely not now.

 

-

 

The room had gone completely dark, the only illumination being the faintest glow from the hallway bleeding in through the crack beneath the door.

 

Uzi laid on her back, staring up at the nothingness above her, eyes half-lidded but unblinking. Her mind raced too much to allow sleep.

 

She turned her head slightly and squinted to the left. Predictably, Lizzy was snoring like a malfunctioning generator—something between a broken buzzsaw and a death rattle. Uzi resisted the overwhelming urge to groan. For a brief, fleeting second, she imagined what would happen if she just smothered Lizzy with a pillow. Nothing lethal—just something to muffle the noise. Would anyone blame her? Would it work?

 

Probably not. Uzi blinked hard and sighed through her nose, turning her head back. She didn’t even bother trying to see past Lizzy’s obnoxious sleeping form to J’s bed beyond—she didn’t want to know what expression J might have in the dark, or worse, whether she was even really asleep.

 

So instead, she turned to her right.

 

V’s bed was within view, her form curled away from Uzi with her back facing outward. Her breathing was slow and steady—definitely asleep. And Uzi, for all her frustration and restless energy, wasn’t stupid enough to wake her. Not if she valued her life. Uzi could imagine how V’s wrath when roused from sleep was probably nothing to play with, and she didn’t have a single ounce of tolerance left within her to deal with that right now.

 

She sighed again and sank a little deeper into the mattress, arms crossed loosely under the blanket. The silence pressed in, heavy and suffocating—except for the chainsaw that was Lizzy, of course.

 

She stared at the ceiling again, wishing she could turn her brain off. Wishing she hadn’t let the opportunity to talk to V slip away. And deep down… wishing that N was here—no, wait, not here here, but just… around. So she could talk to him. Or look at him. Or something. Because right now, she was stuck alone in the dark, tangled in her own overthinking, with nowhere to put it.

 

And sleep wasn’t coming anytime soon.

 

Maybe—maybe —if she just thought about something mundane, she could lull herself to sleep. Count sheep. Think about what she’d eat tomorrow. Replay conversations that didn’t make her want to evaporate from secondhand embarrassment. Something—anythingthat might knock her brain out of its endless, jittery loop.

 

But no.

 

The moment her thoughts brushed against the events of the day, she could feel the spiral begin.

 

The awkwardness of that morning. The confrontation at the museum. N begging Uzi not to leave him. Their conversation on the bus. Everything N revealed, that he probably hadn’t wanted to say, but only did because Uzi forced him to since she was insecure.

 

And then when they got back to the hotel. Even after everything… he still wanted to hold her hand. He still gave her that stupidly soft smile, and even then she didn’t pull away. Because she liked it. She let it happen even though the rational part of her brain had been screaming at her to stop being so reckless, because they were in front of everyone. 

 

And then… now that she thinks about it… why hadn't she considered how much it might’ve meant to him? Or how it might’ve made him feel, especially after all the confusion she’d thrown at him earlier?

 

Uzi groaned inwardly and squeezed her eyes shut.

 

Nope. Not doing this.

 

Her eyes shot open in the darkness, her whole body tensing in quiet frustration. This was ridiculous. She was so tired, bone-deep exhausted from the day, but her mind wouldn't let her rest.

 

It had to be karma. Cosmic punishment for being a clueless, emotionally constipated disaster earlier.

 

Okay, no. She needed a distraction.

 

Uzi turned in bed again, reaching blindly toward the nightstand. Her fingers closed around her phone, and she dragged it beneath the covers with her, cocooning herself in a blanket tent like she was thirteen again trying to hide from her dad.

 

The moment she hit the screen— instant regret. 

 

The brightness blasted her directly in the face. It was like a solar flare went off three inches from her retinas. She let out a sharp inhale and flinched, immediately dimming the screen and shoving the phone farther away from her. Her eyes watered as she blinked rapidly, trying to get rid of the white spots now burned into her vision.

 

Because of course. Of course it could get worse

 

She let her head fall back onto the pillow with a quiet thud, blanket still draped over her head, the phone now hovering at a safer distance.

 

This was her life now—hiding in a blanket cave, squinting at a too-bright screen, running from her own thoughts like they were hunting her down.

 

And despite everything, despite the miserable exhaustion, the embarrassment, the mental fog—her heart still thudded with leftover nerves and something dangerously close to longing.

 

She hated how much she wanted to talk to him right now.

 

Almost without thinking—without even realizing —Uzi’s thumb hovered over the Messages app and tapped it open. Her screen lit up with a list of conversations, but her eyes locked on his name like it was magnetic. It was like her hands were possessed.

 

What was she even doing

 

This was insane.

 

Her brain practically screamed at her to back out, but she ignored it, heart hammering in her chest like it was trying to punch its way out. Her finger hesitated for half a second, then tapped on N’s name. His contact photo—something stupid he must’ve set himself—stared back at her mockingly.

 

She didn’t even let herself think. If she thought, she’d stop. So she just typed.

 

Uzi [1:05 AM]: hey r u awake?

 

Short. Simple. Noncommittal. Casual. Harmless. It read like something a totally normal, not-at-all-anxious drone would send. Nothing weird about it. Right?

 

Wrong.

 

The second she hit send, a tidal wave of panic crashed down over her.

 

What did she just do? What was wrong with her? Why couldn’t she ever just sit still and keep her mouth—or, well, fingers—shut? 

 

She flicked her gaze to the time, and upon processing it she immediately felt worse. It was 1:05 in the morning, for crying out loud. 

 

He was probably asleep. Like a sane drone. Not lying in bed under a blanket fort, blinking through retinal damage and spiraling from his own emotional instability. Because that was her right now.

 

Oh, he was definitely going to think she was weird. Not even just weird—clingy. Or desperate. Or annoying. Or all three. 

 

Uzi clutched the phone tighter, stomach twisting with regret. Her face felt like it was on fire again, and this time it wasn’t even cute—it was pure shame.

 

Okay. Fine. She could fix this.

 

She’d make a deal with herself. 

 

She’d leave the message up for… two minutes. No—five. Three?  Three was a good middle ground. If he didn’t answer by then, she’d delete the message, pretend it never happened. He’d wake up in the morning, scroll through his phone like normal, and never know . It’d be like rewinding time. 

 

Crisis averted. Emotional damage minimized.

 

She glanced at the clock in the corner of her screen.

 

Still 1:05 AM.

 

Great. Her fate would be sealed at 1:08.

 

Uzi stared at the numbers, willing them to move—but deep down hoping  they wouldn’t. But they just sat there, frozen in time, mocking her. Her chest felt tight with anticipation, fingers fidgeting with the corner of her blanket. These were going to be the longest three minutes of her entire existence.

 

Every second dragged like an hour. Every blink felt like an eternity. And the whole time, one thought looped endlessly in her mind:

 

What if he answers?

 

Uzi scrolled aimlessly through the message thread, eyes darting past their older conversations like they were too dangerous to actually read. She just kept flicking her thumb upward, watching the bubbles blur past —and then back down again to the most recent one.

 

Her own.

 

Still there.

 

Still unanswered.

 

She glanced at the top left corner of the screen to check the time.

 

1:06 AM.

 

Only one minute had passed. One miserable, uneventful, agonizing minute. 

 

And now, her body was starting to betray her. Her eyes were getting heavier, her mind a little foggy. Maybe if she just rested her eyes for a second, she’d—

 

Her phone screen lit up.

 

She flinched so hard she nearly flung it across the room.

 

Three dots blinked into existence at the bottom of the screen. N was typing.

 

Her heart skipped a beat.

 

No—this had to be a mistake. A glitch. Or she was delirious from lack of sleep and was just imagining it. She blinked rapidly, rubbed her eyes, then looked again.

 

Still there.

 

Then the message appeared.

 

N ^- ˕ -^ [1:07 AM]: Yeah, I’m awake. What’s up?

 

Just like that. Casual. Normal. Friendly. Real.

 

Uzi stared at the screen, trying to make sense of it—of the very real reply sitting right there in front of her, written by the guy she had convinced herself would definitely think she was weird. And instead, he just… responded. Like it was nothing. Like hearing from her in the middle of the night wasn’t strange at all.

 

Her hands suddenly felt clammy again.

 

Okay. Okay. You started this. You have to answer now.

 

She could practically feel the weight of responsibility settling onto her chest. She couldn’t just leave him on read— she had messaged him , not the other way around. If she chickened out now, it would look even worse. And she didn’t want that.

 

So, she typed slowly, trying to make it sound effortless, even though her brain was spiraling all over again:

 

Uzi [1:08 AM]: i cant sleep

 

She stared at it for a second, then added another line, hesitating for only a breath:

 

Uzi [1:08 AM]: sorry if i woke u up

 

There. Honest. Kind of vulnerable, but not too much. And hopefully not too  pathetic.

 

As she hit send, her heart thudded in her chest again—less panic this time, and more a fluttering anxiety, the kind that settled deep in her stomach and curled up like it was planning to stay there a while. She buried herself deeper beneath the blanket, phone still clutched in both hands, eyes fixed on the screen.

 

Now that she’d started this, she had no idea what was going to happen next. But one thing was certain:

 

Sleep was definitely not happening any time soon.

 

The three dots blinked onto the screen again, and Uzi held her breath like they might disappear if she looked too closely.

 

Then came N’s response.

 

N ^- ˕ -^ [1:08 AM]: It’s okay! I couldn’t sleep either. Was already on my phone LOL :D

 

She blinked once, then reread the message to make sure she read it correctly the first time. He didn’t seem to be remotely weirded out or off put by the fact she was texting him this late. If anything, his response was so him that she had to suppress a smile.

 

Still forcing herself not to smile, Uzi let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding—but the relief didn’t last long. Because now it was her turn again—and the weight of figuring out what to say next suddenly felt unbearable.

 

Her fingers hovered above the screen. She blinked. Thought. Deleted a few words before they were even typed.

 

Now what?

 

Was this the part where she said goodnight and put an end to this whole impulsive mess? Would that make her look awkward? Or worse— rude? But dragging it out felt even more stupid. What was she even trying to do, start a deep midnight heart-to-heart? 

You seriously didn’t think this through, she told herself. 

 

It wasn’t like she could just ask how his day was. Oh, robo-god, no, she didn’t even want to let herself think of that… And she couldn’t just say something like ‘how are you doing’ or ‘what are you up to’ because she already pretty much knew the answer to those questions, and they would probably seem random to him too, and maybe even it’d make things awkward…

 

She stared at the blinking cursor in the message box, thoughts swirling, emotions knotted tight in her chest.

 

What could she even say now?

 

Just as Uzi’s fingers hovered over her screen, trying to summon the courage—or the brainpower—to say something that didn’t sound completely idiotic, she noticed the dots blink to life again.

 

N was typing.

 

Her eyes widened slightly. Wait… what?

 

She froze.

 

Okay, okay—maybe she didn’t need to reply after all. Maybe he had something else to say. That would honestly make her life easier. 

 

So she paused, not typing anything, just watching. Waiting.

 

But then, after a few seconds, the dots vanished.

 

Gone. 

 

He stopped typing.

 

Uzi stared at her screen like it had betrayed her. What does that mean?! Was he waiting for her to say something first? Had she just stared too long and now he’d backed off? Was this all getting too weird? 

 

The panic crept in again. She wasn’t even trying to overthink—her brain was just naturally good at making every normal thing feel like an emergency. She glanced at the time.

 

Two minutes.

 

Two whole minutes since N had last said anything. Since she’d just sat there like an idiot without replying.

 

The silence between them was starting to feel heavy now, like something hanging between two cliff edges.

 

Her thumb hovered near the home button.

 

Maybe I should just… google something.

 

She was desperate at this point. Anything. A casual topic. A joke. A meme. A drone psychology article titled “How to Text a Boy Without Sounding Like You’re About to Have a Nervous Breakdown.”

 

But just as she began to exit the messaging app, her phone vibrated softly. A new message popped onto the screen.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [1:11 AM]: Do you want to meet up somewhere?

 

Uzi’s entire system locked up.

 

Her eyes widened as she reread the message again. And again.

 

What.

 

Her heart missed a beat, then picked up double time, like someone had smacked her internal power core. Her face heated so fast she could feel the flush prickling at the edges of her cheeks. She squeezed her blanket tighter around herself, her screen glowing beneath it like some kind of dangerous secret.

 

Meet up?!?!!

 

What did that mean!? Where? Why? At this hour?

 

Was he serious?

 

She knew N—he wasn’t the type to joke around or try to insinuate anything gross. That just wasn’t him. If he said something, it was probably casual, innocent, maybe even well-meaning.

 

But still.

 

Did he not realize what that message sounded like?! What kind of reaction that would cause in someone who’d already spent the past hour spiraling over every little detail of their last conversation?

 

He probably had no idea how much that one, tiny sentence was wrecking her right now.

 

Her pulse thudded in her ears as her thumbs scrambled to respond—before she even thought through what she was saying.

 

Uzi [1:12 AM]: where?

 

And just like that, the message was sent. Out of her hands. Gone.

 

She clutched the phone close to her chest with both hands, staring wide-eyed at the screen in disbelief at herself.

 

What was she doing?!

 

She had no idea. But her whole chest felt warm and panicked and weirdly electric, and there was no going back now.

 

A moment later, her phone buzzed again.

 

Another message from N.

 

N ≽^- ˕ -^≼ [1:12 AM]: We could meet at that alcove by the elevator? The one with the couches and the huge window.

 

Uzi blinked at it, her eyes still adjusting in the dim glow of her screen. It took her a second to register what he meant. But then the image clicked into place— that alcove.

 

Past the end of her hallway, just beyond the elevators. She remembered it from the first day of the trip. The one with the soft, mismatched couches and the big window overlooking the dim skyline.

 

She also remembered the awkward memory tied to it—how she and N had agreed to meet downstairs after they finished unpacking, and how she completely forgot to text him. She’d left him waiting for over twenty minutes while she got distracted painting her nails (even though it was against her will, since V forced her to), and by the time she left her room and walked over to the elevators, he was waiting at the alcove instead. She vividly remembered his expression—he looked like he’d thought she’d been abducted or something.

 

Her gut still twisted with guilt thinking about it, but she shoved that aside. Now wasn’t the time to revisit that disaster.

 

Because what really consumed her thoughts right now… was the fact that he’d actually asked her to meet up.

 

At 1:00 in the morning.

 

What even was this?!

 

She kept staring at the message, rereading it like it might somehow change if she looked long enough.

 

There was no follow-up clarifying if he meant now, but when else could it be? He wouldn’t have asked unless he was already awake and maybe even already heading there. 

 

Still, her fingers hovered uncertainly over the screen. Part of her wanted to ask, Did you mean right now? Just to be sure. 

 

But she couldn’t bring herself to do it.

 

Her chest felt like it was caught in a vice, every breath stiff and uneven. She wasn’t sure if she was nervous, excited, confused—or all of it at once.

 

So instead of overthinking herself into oblivion, she sent a quick thumbs-up reaction to his message, and immediately shut off her phone.

 

The screen blinked out, and she was swallowed by darkness again.

 

She lay there in silence, her body warm and buzzing beneath the blanket, her mind racing. Slowly, she peeled the covers off her face, letting the cool air settle on her flushed cheeks—but it didn’t help. Her core was still burning.

 

She couldn’t believe she was actually doing this.

 

Sneaking out of her room. At this hour. To meet him .

 

What did this even mean?

 

She didn’t know.

 

But she couldn’t stop herself now.

 

Uzi moved slowly, every motion deliberate and careful. She slid the blanket off her frame, inch by inch, and sat up at the edge of the bed. The darkness made it difficult to see, but she didn’t need much light to feel the tension in her body—her shoulders were rigid, her legs unmoving as she sat there, staring down at her feet.

 

She couldn’t put on her boots. That’d be too loud, too risky. Even just unzipping them might wake someone up, and there was no way she’d risk alerting anyone. So she’d have to make do like this.

 

Her feet dangled just slightly above the floor, and she glanced down to see the vague outline of her socks—barely visible in the dim light filtering through the crack beneath the door. She knew which ones they were, though: the purple pair with tiny black bats stitched all over them. She remembered throwing them on before bed without thinking. And now she was going to meet someone— N, of all drones—in them. 

Great.

 

It all felt surreal. The quiet stillness of the hotel room. The lingering warmth from her bed. The way her heart was hammering inside her chest, even though all she’d done so far was sit up. This whole thing—this idea of sneaking out just to meet up with N in the middle of the night—it was ridiculous.

 

And yet… here she was. Doing exactly that.

 

She caught sight of her phone, still facedown in the spot she’d left it. She had the overwhelming urge to pick it up. Just to check . What if she imagined the whole thing? What if it was just some sleep-deprived spiral and she was about to sneak out into a hallway for no reason?

 

But no. If she turned on the screen, the glow would be way too bright in the dark. It might wake someone up—and that was the last thing she needed. So, with a quiet breath, she forced herself to leave it.

 

She pushed herself up and padded silently across the floor, every step slow and cautious. She stopped by the door and reached for the keycard resting on the small ledge nearby and shoving it in her pocket. She didn’t want to take the chance of locking herself out.

 

With one last glance over her shoulder at the quiet room, Uzi eased open the door. Just enough to slip through. She flinched at the faint creak of the hinges, even though it was barely audible. The hallway light was blinding compared to the darkness she’d been in, so she kept the door as narrowly opened as possible to avoid flooding the room with brightness.

 

Then, in a smooth, practiced motion, she slid through the narrow opening and gently pulled the door shut behind her.

 

And just like that—she was out.

 

She stood in the empty hallway, the hush of the late hour settling over everything like a blanket. The air was cooler out here. Cleaner. But her mind was buzzing far too loud for any of that to matter.

 

She was really doing this. And the strangest part? A tiny, almost terrifying part of her was excited.

 

The hallway lighting was dimmed—mercifully, considering the hour—but to Uzi, stepping from complete darkness into even this soft glow felt like walking straight into a spotlight. Her eyes stung as they strained to adjust, and she winced slightly, bringing a hand up to shield her face. A dull throb began to form behind her eyes, the kind of headache that came not from pain, but from disorientation and exhaustion mixing in just the wrong way.

 

Still, she pressed forward.

 

Her socks made the faintest shuff against the hotel carpet as she walked, careful not to make a sound. The stillness of the hallway only heightened how aware she was of herself—the way her body moved, the way her thoughts swirled like static.

 

She kept her eyes ahead, toward the elevators down the hall. The alcove was just past them.

 

That was where N said to meet.

 

The thought sent a strange flutter through her chest again.

 

She didn’t even know why he wanted to meet. It wasn’t like he had said anything important in the message. No reason . No context. Just a simple, vague question— Do you want to meet up? 

 

And yet she’d said yes. No hesitation. Just a quick reply and a thumbs up, like it was the most natural thing in the world.

 

Why had she done that?

 

Uzi’s brows knit together as she walked. She could’ve turned him down so easily. Told him she was tired. Said she was trying to sleep, or that her roommates might notice if she left. Any excuse would've worked. But instead she agreed to sneak out into a hallway in the middle of the night, wearing bat socks and running on less than four hours of sleep, just because he asked.

 

And now, all the ‘what ifs’ started flooding in. What if this was supposed to be serious? What if something happened? What if he really did need to talk, and she’d misread the whole tone of his message? But then again, wouldn’t he have just said that?


Why didn’t he? 

 

Her mind looped back again and again. No matter how she spun it, every angle felt awkward. She either looked weird for agreeing so easily, or guilty for not asking why, or clingy for even texting him first to begin with.

 

No matter how she looked at it… it was a mess. An anxiety spiral with no off-ramp.

 

Still, her feet carried her forward—slow and quiet—toward whatever this would be.

 

The elevators loomed just ahead, their metal doors faintly aglow beneath the overhead lights. Uzi slowed her steps without fully realizing it, her breath hitching slightly in her chest. She was nearly there—just a few more paces, and she'd round the corner into that alcove. And then… what? She’d see N sitting there? Standing? Would he be waiting expectantly? Casually? Would he be nervous too?

 

The knot in her stomach tightened with every thought, coiling like wire.

 

It wasn’t just nerves anymore—it was a strange, crawling feeling that gripped her insides and refused to let go. Like something just under her chest was scratching at her ribs, trying to get out. An awful, restless blend of anticipation and doubt. Her mind buzzed with quiet panic, but beneath it all was something else too—something warm and electric that she didn’t want to name. Not yet.

 

Why am I freaking out? It’s just N, she told herself firmly, trying to summon logic to crush the chaos. It didn’t work. 

 

She drew in a deep breath, then slowly let it out. Her fingers curled lightly at her sides.

 

Okay. This isn’t a big deal. We’re just hanging out. Just talking. That’s it. Another breath. This doesn’t have to mean anything.  

 

But the moment she thought that, her heart clenched again like it was laughing at her for even trying to believe it.

 

It did mean something. Or at least… it felt like it might. 

 

This is fine, she thought, repeating it like a mantra she didn’t believe. He couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t sleep. It’s nothing weird. We’re just— 

 

Her brain cut her off.

 

In the middle of the night. In some random ass alcove. Alone. 

 

She inhaled again, sharper this time. It was hard to steady herself when her thoughts were spinning in every direction. Her body was stuck somewhere between wanting to bolt and wanting to see what happened next. And still, despite the nerves, she kept walking. She didn’t stop.

 

Because whether this was nothing—or everything—she wanted to see him.

 

With that thought, Uzi finally stepped into the alcove, her pace slowing to a halt almost instantly.

 

The first thing that caught her eye wasn’t N, but the massive floor-to-ceiling window stretched along the far wall—an expansive pane of glass that offered a sweeping view of the city below. The same one she’d seen before. And for a long second, she forgot why she was even there.

 

Because city at night was nothing like it had been during the day.

 

It glowed.

 

Not with the sterile brightness of sunlight, but with something deeper—more alive

 

Neon signs pulsed and flickered from rooftops and windows, throwing hues of violet, crimson, and electric blue across the glass. The signs of bars, clubs, and restaurants buzzed in the distance, casting glowing streaks of motion onto the buildings across the street. Skyscrapers loomed ominously among horizon, dark pillars with squares of light littered along their tall bodies. Animated ads plastered on billboards or on the sides of long buildings looped silently—colors bleeding into one another like moving art—while a spinning, golden sign for a casino far in the distance rotated slowly near the skyline. Even the traffic seemed softer somehow, calmer; headlights slid across the streets like fireflies drifting through fog, trailing light that shimmered on the window’s reflection.

 

And above it all—above the chaos and the color—was the sky.

 

A deep, endless black.

 

Dotted faintly with stars.

 

Tiny pinpricks of silver, scattered like dust across a velvet canvas. Uzi stared at them longer than she meant to, her breath catching slightly in her throat. The stars didn’t even look real. Like they’d been placed there deliberately, as if the city hadn’t already been beautiful enough.

 

She blinked, her thoughts struggling to catch up.

 

Was… this why N had asked her here?

 

She doubted it. He probably hadn’t even thought about the view. It had to be a coincidence. But the idea that maybe— maybe —he had brought her here for this, just so they could see this together, made her heart skip in a way she hated noticing. 

Her gaze scanned the alcove—sleek couches lined the walls, cushions dark against the dim lighting, everything quiet and still—but there was no sign of him. No soft click of footsteps, no glint of golden eyes. Just the buzz of electricity from the lights and the faint hum of the elevator down the hall.

 

She was alone.

 

And suddenly, all that beauty outside the window felt heavier, like it was pressing against her chest.

 

Where was he?

 

Just as Uzi was beginning to wonder if she’d misread the whole situation, two hands suddenly slipped over her eyes from behind.

 

Her whole body jolted.

 

A startled yelp almost escaped her, but it caught in her throat when she heard a soft, familiar voice near her ear—playful, gentle.

 

Guess who?

Notes:

IM SO SO SORRY GIYS FOR TAKING SO LONG TO UPDATE OMFGGGHHG IM SORRY 😭😭😭😭

It’s been what…? Almost 2 weeks?

UGH KMS I’ve been super busy. I think I mentioned in my last author’s notes that I was going out of town (correct me if I’m wrong) and I did for a week. Visited family and stuff which was fun ig. Then I got back home like, this past Sunday(?) and had to catch up with some stuff I missed while I was gone. And then the next 2 weeks I’m gonna be busy too cuz a lot is happening in my personal life 🫩

BUT THIS ISNT ABT ME what did yall think of the chapter 👹👹 I really really hope this was worth the wait.

ALSO ALSO NEWSSS im gonna post the next chapter TOMORROW cuz why tf would I leave yall on this cliff hanger for multiple days after not posting for 2 weeks? That’d be so shitty of me 😭

And the next chapter is gonna be SUPER fucking long. I’m like, 60-70% done writing it (haven’t edited it) and still haven’t even gotten to the part where the paranoia question is gonna be brought up 🤧 cuz again yes that’s being brought up and REVEALED jeez

And normally I would’ve split the chapter into multiple ones, but since I’ve been making yall wait for so long, I thought I might as well post 1 super long detailed chapter rather than js a few fucking puzzle pieces of that chapter one by one 😭 like again no way am I doing that

Also I’m SO happy with how it’s turning out. Like UGHWJEOLSNWE a lot is happening. ALOT. BUT that’s for yall to find out tomorrow 😃

Also one thing, do u think I did the city description okay?? I’m trying to base it off of New York, if u somehow haven’t figured that out, but like… I’ve never been to New York, or like any city like that 😭 I’m from the south and like… yeah we have downtown areas and stuff and it’s kinda city like, but not New York level city like. And aren’t northern cities different than southern cities?? Idk I literally know nothing abt the north it’s so bad 🥲 OH also im talking abt in America, js to clarify in case someone was confused.

But yeah basically I’m asking is the city description accurate *enough.* I kinda js pulled it out of no where since I didn’t use photo references and js thought of movies I’ve watched idk

Sorry for rambling abt that, ik it’s the most random thing ever, but I was js thinking abt that 😭

Ik this is also really random but I’ve been listening to a lot of podcast recently where people read stories and give their constructive criticism, and I’m really trying to keep a lot of that in mind. Idk if I’m making this up but I worry that some things I write sound a bit repetitive at times- like that’s my biggest issue, trying to word things better or do new things that fit, if that makes sense.

Did I ask what yall think of this chapter? I don’t think I’ve really mentioned it in this a/n at all so far, like as for the actual content. Again I hope yall liked it!!

One more thing, genuinely off topic, but yk how I mentioned that discord server a few times and like never talk abt it? Well, I should be done with it sometime within the next 2 months. Ik that sounds like forever, and it probably will be LESS time than that (like maybe 3 and a half weeks??) it really is depends on how busy I am cuz I have no time to work on it currently, but my life should be calming down soon so I will *actually* have the time 😩 I’m excited to finally get ts done cuz like I really like the concept I have going on for it and I think is gonna be a great place to hang out and stuff, not only js for writers but also for people who enjoy reading fics, or any written stories for that matter. I’ll give yall more updates on that soon, but my next update abt the discord specifically will probably be in 2 weeks. Ik that’s oddly specific but I have my reasons 🤧

Alright, js to say it again, the next chapter will be posted tomorrow!!! It’s gonna be super long and descriptive, and also have a solid amount of dialogue. Even a tad bit of angst… among other things. BUT I CANT SAY ANYMORE you’ll have to wait till tomorrow 😈

OK BYEEEE

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 89: Puppy-Dog Eyes

Notes:

This is a super long chapter so brace yourselves… 😥

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Her heart was pounding, but not from fear anymore. She instantly recognized him.

 

It was N. Of course it was N.

 

The way he said it—his tone so light and careful, like he was trying not to scare her, even though he totally had—left no room for doubt. 

 

She felt the corners of her mouth twitch upward despite herself. Still, that didn’t change the fact that he’d scared the absolute hell out of her.

 

So, instead of answering, Uzi lifted her foot and kicked backward—just enough to land a swift, calculated tap to his shin.

 

There was a sharp intake of breath behind her.


Ow—!

 

He recoiled immediately, his hands vanishing from her face as he staggered back a step. When she turned around, he was already hunched slightly over, clutching his shin with both hands and blinking at her like a wounded puppy.

 

Uzi crossed her arms, trying to keep her expression neutral. “Never do that again,” she said flatly, but the tight smile she was suppressing betrayed her almost instantly.

 

N glanced up at her, and for a second, she expected him to pout or protest—but he didn’t. Instead, he stood up straighter, though he still rubbed at the spot she’d kicked like it was going to bruise. The moment he was upright, she was reminded—annoyingly—just how much taller he was than her.

 

But despite that, there was nothing intimidating about him.

 

If anything, he looked almost… bashful.

 

He rubbed the back of his neck with one hand, his eyes flicking off to the side, not quite able to meet hers. “Sorry,” he muttered, sheepishly. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

 

There was no teasing in his voice—just sincere, quiet regret.

 

Uzi felt her irritation melt away almost instantly. She wanted to stay annoyed, but somehow, with him, that was impossible. 

 

Her chest felt too tight, her face too warm. She could still feel the ghost of his hands across her eyes. The way he’d said guess who—like it was a secret just between them—was playing on repeat in her head whether she liked it or not. 

 

Uzi let out a quiet sigh—not of frustration, but more like she was trying to steady herself. Her nerves were buzzing, and her thoughts were a mess of static and heat.

 

With a small step forward, she gave N a shove to the arm—more of a nudge than anything—and rolled her eyes.

 

“It’s fine,” she muttered, halfheartedly. “I guess.” 

 

She tried to sound annoyed, like she hadn’t almost jumped out of her skin a minute ago—but the truth was, it felt more like teasing than anything else. Her voice was too soft, her push too gentle. If it had been anyone else, she probably would’ve swung harder.

 

N looked at her with that familiar crooked smile that made it impossible to stay irritated. His shoulders relaxed a bit, as if her answer—though mildly sarcastic—had lifted some invisible weight from him.

 

Then silence fell between them.

 

It wasn’t uncomfortable… not yet. But Uzi could feel the edges of it creeping in, threatening to turn heavy if neither of them spoke soon. She glanced around, searching for something— anything —to break the quiet.

 

She motioned toward the couches. “Wanna sit?”

 

N perked up immediately, his eyes lighting up as he nodded. “Yeah! Yeah, that sounds great.”

 

He pointed to one of the couches along the left wall, “We could sit over there,” it was just a few steps away, its cushions angled toward the massive window and bathed in the soft glow of the city lights outside.

 


Uzi gave a quiet nod, and the two of them headed over.

 

She sat down first, settling on the right cushion, the fabric firm beneath her. A second later, N lowered himself beside her, taking the left spot—close enough that their arms didn’t touch, but almost. The proximity made her throat feel tight.

 

The view from this angle was incredible. Being closer, she was able to absorb the scene more. The glass that stretched from floor to ceiling felt almost intimating because of its height up close. And it continued to reveal the night in all its chaotic, glittering glory. The neon lights of the city painted the skyline in flickering color, ads pulsing in vibrant reds, blues, and greens. Even the stars above the distant towers looked more vivid somehow, as if the sky itself was alive.

 

But Uzi could barely take it in.

 

Not with N sitting this close.

 

She could feel the faint warmth of him beside her, hear every little shift of movement, every breath. She stared hard at the window, trying to focus on the view—but all she could think about was how aware she suddenly was of her posture, her expression, even where her hands were resting in her lap. Everything felt heightened. Exposed.

 

This wasn’t just insomnia and coincidence anymore. This felt like… something else.

 

Something she couldn’t quite name.

 

And it scared her.


But it also made it almost impossible to look away.

 

As Uzi sat there, trying to gather her scattered thoughts into something that resembled a conversation starter, N beat her to it.

 

“I didn’t think you’d actually say yes…” he said, his voice light but tinged with something uncertain, like he was surprised she was really there beside him.

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard. The comment hung between them for a second longer than it probably should have. She didn't know how to respond at first—was she supposed to make a joke? Shrug it off? Pretend it wasn’t kind of true?

 

Eventually, and maybe a little too cautiously, she muttered, “Why’d you even want to meet up this late?”

 

It came out more direct than she intended. Not cold, but not soft either. And the moment it left her mouth, she felt herself regret it—or at least worry she should.

 

Maybe that sounded accusatory. Maybe it made her seem like she didn’t want to be here. But it was too late now.

 

She glanced sideways at him, though she didn’t fully turn her head. Just enough to watch his expression without being obvious.

 

He didn’t look offended. If anything, he just seemed thoughtful—like he was actually taking the question seriously.

 

Then he tilted his head a little and asked, “…you really want to know?”

 

That made her turn to look at him properly.

 

He wasn’t smirking. He wasn’t being cryptic or dramatic, either. He looked sincere—genuine in a way that made something flutter uncomfortably low in her chest.

 

Uzi raised an eyebrow. “...Sure?” The word came out quiet. Not uncertain, exactly, but… cautious.

 

She exhaled through her nose, barely a sound, and leaned back just slightly. N’s voice hadn’t hinted at anything suspicious or suggestive, and he wasn’t acting weird.

 

And yet, there was still something about the way he had asked that question that stirred up an unease in her—not fear, but that nervous, fluttery feeling that came when something was just a little too honest.

 

Did she actually want to know the answer?

 

She wasn't sure.


But she couldn’t pretend she didn’t.

 

There was a beat of quiet between them, that uncertain kind of silence that felt like it was waiting to tip over into something else.

 

Then, from the corner of her eye, Uzi saw him glance her way—briefly—before looking away again. His hand drifted absently to his palm, picking at the edge of the plating there with a kind of absentminded focus. Not anxious exactly… more like he was sorting through his words.

 

Finally, N spoke. His voice was soft. Honest.

 

“I couldn’t sleep,” he admitted, not quite meeting her gaze. “Because I just… kept thinking about you.”

 

The words hit her like a wrench to the chest. Her whole body stiffened slightly, and she felt a rush of static heat creep up her neck, blooming across her face like an electrical short. He what?

 

He kept talking, almost like he didn’t notice the way she suddenly froze up. “I didn’t expect you to text me,” he continued, still watching his hands, like maybe it was easier than looking at her. “But when you did, I don’t know. I just thought… why not ask. I wanted to see you. Be near you. I guess I just wanted to know you were okay. With… everything. Y’know, since you’re stuck rooming with J, and she knows now that you—…” he trailed off.

 

Uzi had barely registered what he said at all.

 

Or—she did, but it was background noise compared to the rush in her ears. Her processors were stuttering, completely hung up on that first part: ‘I kept thinking about you.’ 

 

That shouldn’t have made her react the way it did. But it did. She felt like her whole internal system had just decided to lock up.

 

She quickly turned her head away from him, pretending to glance at something in the corner of the alcove, even though there was nothing there worth looking at other than a potted plant. Her hand moved unconsciously to her lap, fingers curling into the fabric of her pajama pants. Not tightly, but enough to ground herself. Enough to stop herself from doing something embarrassing.

 

The alcove lighting was dim—thankfully—but not that dim. Could he see her expression right now? Wait. Oh no. Couldn’t he see really well in the dark? 

 

Uzi’s gaze snapped downward, face half-turned away now in a weak attempt to hide whatever look she had on. Her mind was spiraling, trying to recalibrate and recover, but it was hard when her core felt like it had just jumped into overdrive. She wasn't even sure if she was flustered or panicking.

 

Maybe both.

 

Okay. She needed to think logically. That was the only way to stop the spiraling.

 

N had just said he was worried because she was rooming with J—and they both knew what J was capable of. That made perfect sense. So obviously, that’s what he meant. It wasn’t… weird. It wasn’t—

 

But still.

 

It was 1 A.M.

 

One in the morning.

 

And he said he couldn’t sleep because he was thinking about her. How long had that been going on? Half an hour? An hour? Longer? All night? 

 

Her mind latched onto the possibilities like a missile locking onto a target. He had said it was because he was worried, sure, but the phrasing kept bouncing around her head like an echo chamber. Kept thinking about you. She couldn’t get it to quiet down.

 

Was he really just tossing and turning and thinking about her safety? For hours?

 

A part of her felt guilty at the idea—like she’d stolen his ability to sleep without even meaning to. But another, smaller part—annoyingly stronger than she wanted to admit—was stuck on how deeply flustering that was. He had been thinking about her. That much. That hard. 

 

And not just in a passing thought kind of way. In a can’t sleep, late-night, keep replaying everything in your head kind of way. 

 

Her processor was overheating again. She could feel it.

 

Suddenly, she felt a light tap against her arm. It jolted her out of her thoughts just in time to hear N softly say her name. “Uzi…?”

 

Her gaze snapped toward him on reflex—only to instantly regret it.

 

She could feel the weird expression plastered on her face. Wide eyes. Red face. Lips parted like she’d just been caught doing something she wasn’t supposed to.

 

Why did she look like that?! Why couldn’t she just have a normal face right now?! 

 

N’s brows furrowed, a flicker of concern in his soft gaze. He leaned forward just slightly, head tilted, his voice lower now.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

And just like that, her systems stuttered again.

 

She looked away so quickly it almost felt like a dodge. Her gaze dropped back to her lap, to her fingers still gripping the edges of her pajama pants like some kind of grounding wire. She forced out a response, voice faltering despite her best effort.

 

“Y–yeah. I’m fine.”

 

The stutter betrayed her completely.

 

She immediately bit the inside of her cheek and inwardly cursed herself. Nice job, Uzi. Really subtle. She probably looked like a scrambled mess right now—face burning, voice shaky, expression all wrong. Did she seem like she was short-circuiting? Because honestly, she might have been. 

 

There was a moment of silence—tense, uncertain, and far too fragile.

 

Then N finally spoke again, his voice softer now, and tinged with something uncertain. Guilt? Maybe even regret? “I… sorry if that came off weird,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck as his gaze briefly flicked away from her. “I didn’t mean it in a weird way or anything, I just… I don’t know…”

 

He trailed off, the words dying before they fully formed, like he couldn’t quite find the right ones.

 

Uzi’s eyes stayed on him, trying to read between the lines. She could see the hesitation in his expression, the faint crease between his brows, the sheepish way his shoulders tucked in like he was bracing for a reaction he didn’t want.

 

But she wasn’t upset.

 

If anything, she was flustered beyond comprehension.

 

So she shook her head—just a little, just enough—and pushed through the anxious pounding in her head. “No,” she murmured, almost too quiet. “It’s alright. I don’t… I don’t think it’s weird.” She felt like her voice was made of static. Every syllable scraped past a barricade of nerves she didn’t know how to get over.

 

N blinked in surprise, turning to look at her more fully. “Really?” he asked, not with any hint of mockery, not sarcastic or disbelieving—just… surprised. “You kind of looked freaked out…”

 

The words hit harder than she expected.

 

He noticed. 

 

Duh! How wouldn’t he?! He noticed how out of sorts she looked—how her face had probably flushed a deep red, how she’d struggled to get a sentence out without seemingly short-circuiting. Did he think she was uncomfortable? That she didn’t want to be here? 

 

Because that wasn’t true. That wasn’t true at all

 

She opened her mouth, trying to speak, to explain herself—only to trip over the very first syllable. Her voice stammered, cracking into half-formed words before giving up entirely. She looked like a total disaster, and she knew it. 

 

Her gaze finally lifted, and she looked directly at N—eyes wide, lips pressed into a firm, helpless line. She didn’t know what she expected to find in his expression, but what she did find made her pulse stutter all over again. 

 

He was watching her.

 

Not judgmentally. Not confused. Not amused.

 

Just… watching. Like he was trying to understand.

 

His golden eyes had locked onto hers, scanning her face with this quiet attentiveness—just the tiniest furrow in his brow, the barest tilt to his head. He looked concerned. Genuinely. Not because she was acting weird, but because he could tell something was tangled inside her, and he was trying to read it without pushing her.

 

And somehow, that made the silence between them feel even heavier.

 

Neither moved. Neither spoke. And yet, there was a tension laced in the stillness, pulling taut with every passing second.

 

Uzi didn’t know how long they’d been looking at each other, only that neither of them seemed willing to look away first. N’s eyes held hers like they were caught on a thread—and for once, Uzi didn’t feel the urge to break it. Not right away.

 

But thenthenher gaze flicked downward.

 

Just for a moment.

 

Just long enough to catch the curve of his lips before she sharply returned to his eyes, the realization hitting her like static through her core.

 

A quiet ache stirred in her chest—yearning, unsure, and painfully aware.

 

She wanted to kiss him. She wanted to close the space between them, to lean in and finally just do it. It wasn’t fear that held her back, not really. It was… the pressure of it. The awareness. Her nerves were already coiled so tightly that even moving an inch felt impossible. And more than that, she just—she didn’t want to ruin the moment. 

 

So instead, she glanced away—retreating into the safety of looking down at her hands. Her fingers curled slightly into the fabric of her pajama pants again. The flickering thoughts in her head were relentless, and yet she said nothing. Not yet.

 

She could still feel N’s gaze on her, warm and present at the edge of her vision. It wasn’t invasive. Just… there. Watching her the way he always did when he was trying to understand something he didn’t know how to ask about.

 

Then, finally—his voice cut through the quiet.

 

Soft. Careful. Almost hesitant.

 

“…Can I sit closer to you?”

 

Uzi blinked, startled—but not overwhelmed like before. Her breath caught in her chest, and something fluttered in her stomach, painfully gentle. It wasn’t the question itself that made her heart jump. It was the way he asked. Like her comfort mattered more than anything else. 

 

Like he didn’t want to assume—even when they were already close.

 

It was such a simple thing. But to her, in that moment, it meant everything

 

She didn’t look up right away. She physically couldn’t. The knot in her chest twisted tighter, flustering her all over again. He didn’t usually make her feel this frozen—not like thisbut tonight was different. The mood was different. And something about the way he asked, the softness of it, made her feel like she might short out if she said yes. 

 

But she wanted to say yes. So badly. 

 

But there was one problem… she couldn’t speak—not because she didn’t want to, but because the words refused to form.

 

Everything inside her felt like it was pulsing too loud, too fast. So instead, Uzi gave the tiniest nod, quick and barely there—so small it might’ve gone unnoticed by anyone else.

 

But not by N.

 

He was watching. Obviously. And somehow, that subtle movement was enough.

 

He shifted closer—but not all at once. It was slow, deliberate, like he was testing the space between them with every inch he moved. No rush. No assumption. Just care.

 

Uzi’s breath hitched quietly the moment their legs touched—barely more than a brush at first, then steadily, fully, pressing together from knee to thigh. The contact grounded her, but also made her heart stutter with a quiet panic she didn’t know how to ease. It wasn’t fear. It wasn’t discomfort. It was something warmer, far more dangerous: the awareness that thiswhatever was happening right now—mattered to her more than she could explain. 

 

She didn’t dare look at him. If she turned her head even slightly, they’d be face to face, and she wasn’t sure she’d survive it.

 

But oh, she was aware of him. Every breath he took seemed to sync with hers. His proximity was a hum in her thoughts, his presence heavy in the best way. He was thereright there—and it made her feel like her chest couldn’t decide whether to collapse or expand. 

 

Then, after a beat of hesitation, she felt N’s arm gently wrapping around her waist.

 

Her eyes widened slightly—reflexive—but she didn’t pull away. There was a quiet moment of stillness as her mind raced. It wasn’t too tight, wasn’t possessive. Just… comforting. Protective. Meant to hold, not to trap.

 

Without even thinking, Uzi shifted closer—just enough to let him fit his arm more naturally around her. And the second she did, she leaned into him.

 

The tension in her shoulders softened. The cold edges of her thoughts dulled.

 

She let herself melt, just a little.

 

And for a moment, all that buzzing in her head faded into something quieter.

 

Something that felt like safety.

 

It took everything she had—every ounce of courage buried beneath the thundering in her chest—for Uzi to finally lift her eyes and look at him.

 

The second their gazes locked, the world tilted.

 

Her breath caught in her throat, sharp and quiet. His eyes were already on hers, and the intensity in them hit her like static—warm, gentle, and absolutely impossible to look away from.

 

She stared, wide-eyed, trying to read him, to understand what he was thinking—but the problem was that he was doing the exact same thing. Searching her. Watching her. Trying to see past her flustered silence. 

 

And their faces were closeso close it made her pulse stumble.

 

She didn’t mean to glance at his mouth again, but she did—just for a second. Then back to his eyes.

 

It was like something magnetic was pulling her in, slowly, steadily, her body leaning toward his before she even realized it.

 

But before anything could happen—

 

He moved.

 

But not in the way she expected.

 

N reached out and gently pulled her into him, wrapping his other arm around her and drawing her into a full embrace.

 

Uzi froze—only for a breath—but then let herself be guided into it. One hand rested against the small of her back, and the other pressed gently to the back of her head, careful, like she was something delicate.

 

Her head ended up just below his shoulder—fitting naturally, comfortably, with the way their heights aligned.

 

She didn’t fight it. She didn’t want to.

 

The hug wasn’t rushed. It was full, whole. At first, he held her tightly—firm enough to let her feel it—and then gradually relaxed into something softer.

 

For a second, Uzi didn’t move, trying to process what had just happened. Her hands lingered in midair for a heartbeat before she finally wrapped her arms around him too.

 

And when she did, it hit her—how warm he felt. How solid. How safe.

 

She closed her eyes.

 

Then his voice—quiet, low, nearly lost in the silence—broke through the moment.

 

…Thank you.

 

Uzi blinked against his shirt, caught off guard.

 

Her brow furrowed slightly, but she didn’t pull back. She stayed where she was, still held in his arms, and softly asked, “…For what?”

 

And though she couldn’t see his face, she could feel something shift in his silence. Like the words that followed would carry more weight than she was ready for.

 

The silence between them lingered—thick, still, almost sacred—until N finally spoke.

 

“…For not leaving.”

 

His voice was quiet. Honest. The kind of honesty that didn’t need to be explained because it came straight from the heart.

 

And the weight of those three words landed hard.

 

Uzi’s body tensed, barely noticeable, but definite. She hadn’t been thinking about that. Not until now. Not until he said it out loud.

 

She’d been so tangled up in her nerves—her racing thoughts, the proximity, the way he made her feel just by being there—that she’d managed to forget everything that had happened just the day before. But the moment he said it, it all came flooding back. 

The museum.

 

Her yelling at him. Her voice cracking from the anger, the fear, the heartbreak.

 

Accusing him of lying to her. Of only seeing her as a ghost of someone else.

 

And then—N, desperate, telling her not to go. Not to walk away.

 

The bus ride after, quiet but charged, where he admitted something he had never told anyone else, only because she had demanded. The way he clung to her like she was the last steady thing in his world.

 

And how she—still overwhelmed, still too full of guilt and confusion—had only barely managed to tell him she didn’t want to leave him, even if it seemed like she had.

 

But she hadn’t said she was sorry.

 

Not once. 

 

She should’ve. She’d wanted to. But every time the words had built up in her throat, something—fear, shame, stubbornness—kept her from saying them. Kept her from facing the damage she’d done. Like a coward.

 

And yet, here he was… thanking her.

 

Thanking her. 

 

It hit like a slow ache, one that settled deep in her chest. He wasn’t just relieved that she was physically here, still talking to him. No—he was grateful that she chose to stay, even after everything. That she hadn’t turned her back on him, even when she had every chance to. 

 

And that meant more to him than she realized. Maybe more than he could say.

 

Her guilt twisted deeper.

 

She had hurt him. She knew she had. And no matter how much she wished she could undo all she said in the museum, she couldn’t. 

 

But she could own it. And she needed to. Not just because he deserved it—but because she couldn’t carry this weight anymore. 

 

Uzi slowly pulled back from him, and she felt N’s arms loosen around her with clear reluctance—not out of rejection, but hesitation. Like he didn’t want to let her go but understood that she needed the space. 

Her movement wasn’t sudden, but deliberate. Determined.

 

She sat upright now, putting a small bit of distance between them. Her gaze locked onto his—intense, unwavering. There was something in her expression that hadn’t been there moments ago. Not flustered nerves or bashful embarrassment.

 

Something heavier.

 

N tilted his head slightly, clearly picking up on the shift. His expression softened in response, a hint of concern behind his eyes. He didn’t say anything yet, but it was obvious—he sensed that something was different now.

 

Uzi inhaled. Quiet but deep. The kind of breath you take before ripping open a wound that never got a chance to heal.

 

…I’m sorry.”

 

N blinked, clearly caught off guard. He looked… confused?

 

“For what?” he asked, brows drawn together, voice still gentle.

 

And just like that, the warmth in her chest gave way to an instant flare of frustration.

 

Not directed at him— not really —but at the situation. At herself.

 

What did the hell did he mean ‘for what?’!?

 

Did he not realize? Had he seriously forgotten!? 

 

Everything she said to him at the museum—the accusations, the way she lashed out, calling him a liar, pushing him away like he didn’t mean anything—how could he not see how much damage that caused? Didn’t he know

 

But she could tell he wasn’t trying to provoke anything. His expression wasn’t smug or dismissive. He looked genuinely puzzled. Like he didn’t understand why she was the one apologizing right now.

 

And that almost made it worse.

 

Because now she had to say it. 

 

She had to put words to the guilt that had been eating her alive since yesterday. She had to say out loud the things she regretted—every cruel assumption, every word thrown in fear and panic. She couldn’t hide behind implication or silence anymore.

 

Her stomach twisted.

 

She didn’t want to see the look on his face when she said it. But she also needed him to hear it.

 

Uzi’s eyes faltered. She couldn’t hold his gaze anymore—not when the weight of her own guilt threatened to crush her from the inside out. Looking at N in that moment felt unbearable. Like staring into the eyes of someone she didn’t deserve to be this close to.

 

So, she looked down, away from him, her hands wringing tightly in her lap as if she could strangle the tension out of her fingers.

 

It took her a moment to speak. The words weren’t just difficult—they were stubborn. They caught in her throat, refused to form, and when they finally escaped, they were uneven and tight. Not shaky from nerves, but from resistance. Like dragging something out of a place it had been buried for too long. 

 

I’m sorry,” she murmured again, quieter this time, barely more than a breath. 

 

She didn’t dare look up.

 

“I’m… sorry for what I said earlier. At the museum.”

 

Her voice was stronger now, but only just.

 

The edges were raw, sandpapered by shame. She blinked, hard, trying to push away the sudden burn welling behind her eyes. Absolutely not. She wasn’t going to cry right now. That would make this whole thing look like some pity performance—like she was the one who needed comfort. 

 

And this wasn’t about her.

 

She wasn’t the one who had been hurt.

 

Uzi clenched her jaw, trying to will away the feeling, then ran a hand through her messy hair, tugging slightly at the strands to ground herself. Her other hand stayed clenched in her lap, shaking just a little.

 

“I shouldn’t have said the things I did,” she went on, each word carrying a strange weight. “I called you selfish. I called you a liar. I didn’t even let you talk. I just… I kept going.” 

 

She exhaled sharply through her nose, trying to steady herself.

 

“I didn’t mean any of it,” she added, voice quieter again. “I wasn’t thinking clearly. I was upset. I was scared. But that doesn’t make it okay.” 

 

Her eyes stayed locked on her lap, as if it were the only safe place to look.

 

This— all of this —was something she almost never did. Owning up to her faults like this, not with deflection or half-jokes or clumsy dodges. This was her standing in front of it all, fully exposed. 

 

And she hated every second of it. But it mattered. Because he mattered. 

 

Uzi kept going—not because she wanted to, but because she had to. The words poured out of her like water from a cracking dam, desperate and inevitable.

 

“And I shouldn’t have raised my voice at you either,” she continued, quieter now, but not any less intense. Her voice had lost its earlier strain, softened by exhaustion more than anything else. “You… you were so patient with me. You always are. And I just—yelled at you? Like that was fair? Like you deserved that?” 

 

She shook her head, her fingers curling in on themselves tightly in her lap again, nails almost digging into the backs of her hands.

 

“I wasn’t even angry at you. I was just…” she trailed off briefly, then scoffed under her breath—not at him, but at herself. “No, it wasn’t even that. I wasn’t confused. It wasn’t a misunderstanding. It was just… something I convinced myself of without even stopping to think. I didn’t even try to understand how you felt.” 

 

Her voice thinned out again. “That’s not on you. That’s on me.”

 

A pause. Her jaw clenched.

 

I’m the selfish one,” she whispered, and her eyes shut for a moment like the words stung. “Not you. You didn’t deserve any of that. Not a single word.” 

 

The silence that followed was heavy. She forced herself to inhale, slow and steady, trying to collect whatever strength she had left.

 

And then—finally—she looked up at him.

 

Her eyes found his, and she searched his face for something—anger, maybe. Sadness. Reassurance.

 

But it was unreadable.

 

His expression didn’t give anything away, and that unsettled her more than if he’d looked hurt or furious.

 

Still, she didn’t look away.

 

“I’m sorry for hurting you,” she said softly, holding eye contact even though everything inside her wanted to shrink back and disappear. “For making you feel like you didn’t matter. Because you do. You always have.”

 

She swallowed.

 

“If anything…” her voice cracked faintly, but she didn’t back down. “I should be thanking you. For not walking away. For still being here. You didn’t give up on me, even when I gave you every reason to.” 

 

She exhaled, shaky and worn.

 

“You’ve been so patient with me. I couldn’t have asked for anyone better in my life, N. I’m lucky to have you. So lucky.” 

 

And with that… she finally stopped.

 

Uzi felt like she’d just run a marathon without moving. Her chest rose and fell with the weight of everything she’d just said, the truth of it all leaving her nearly breathless.

 

There was nothing else to add. No more words left to drag out. It was all there now—laid bare between them.

 

All she could do was wait for him to speak.

 

She couldn’t stop staring. She was trying—truly trying—to decipher what N was thinking, but his expression remained unreadable. Not cold. Not detached. Just… blank. 

 

But the longer she looked, the more she began to notice the subtle cracks in the surface.

 

His eyes were glistening—not from the dim lighting, but from the unmistakable sheen of unshed tears. His posture was still, a little too still, and though he made eye contact, it was like he was holding himself together by a thread. A faint sniffle broke the silence, quiet enough that anyone else might’ve missed it—but Uzi didn’t. 

 

She squinted slightly, her brows furrowing.

 

That expression… it wasn’t indifference. It was control.

 

He was trying not to cry.

 

And then finally, N leaned in just the slightest bit. His voice came low, soft—almost like he was afraid that if he spoke too loud, everything between them would shatter again.

 

“I was never upset with you.”

 

Uzi’s eyes widened just a little.

 

He paused, and for a second it looked like he might stop there—but then he added, “But… I had no idea you felt that way. I thought you were just… mad at me and…” His voice trailed off, like the rest of the sentence caught in his throat.

 

But instead of finishing it, he gently shook his head.

 

No. That doesn’t matter.”

 

There was another pause—brief, but weighted—before the corners of his mouth pulled into a small, lopsided smile. It wasn’t his usual cheerful grin. It was something softer. Something real.

 

“What matters is… I accept your apology.”

 

He straightened his posture slightly after he said it, like he wanted to be sure the words had landed clearly.

 

And oh, they had. 

 

Uzi hadn’t even realized how tight every part of her body had been until that moment. The sheer relief that washed over her was overwhelming. It was as though every ounce of guilt, every heavy thought that had been strangling her for hours, just vanished. She let out a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding—a shaky exhale that almost felt like a sigh of survival. 

 

She didn’t hesitate.

 

Without thinking, without even weighing how he might react, she leaned in and wrapped her arms around him—not tightly, but enough to feel him there. Enough to anchor herself to this moment.

 

He was still here.

 

And he forgave her.

 

N didn’t waste a second before hugging her back.

 

His arms wrapped around her without hesitation, one hand resting at the middle of her back while the other gently curled around her shoulder.

 

He didn’t need words; his hold alone said everything. And Uzi? She melted into it. Her face pressed into the space just between his shoulder and neck, eyes fluttering shut as the tension in her frame unraveled like thread. She let herself breathe, really breathe, for the first time that night.

 

It felt… safe. Warm. Calming in a way she hadn’t realized she’d been craving.

 

She shifted just slightly, her legs already brushing against his, but she leaned in more—pressing her body fully to his side. It was instinctual. A silent way of telling him she wanted to stay here, just like this, for as long as he’d let her. Maybe forever.

 

A minute passed—maybe two. It was hard to tell with how still everything had become.

 

She could hear the quiet hum of the city outside the window, feel the subtle motion of his breathing, and then—

 

She felt a slow, gentle movement. His thumb, brushing her shoulder. Once, twice, and again. Soft and rhythmic. It pulled her slightly back to the present—reminded her where she was, reminded her that this moment was real.

 

She shifted a little, slowly pulling back, though not all the way. Her left arm stayed wrapped around him, fingers curling lightly at his side. As they separated, her gaze lifted to meet his—but then her hand moved.

 

Gently, she let her fingertips trail across his shoulder. A ghost of a touch, tender and precise. Her hand glided up the side of his neck, her palm lightly cupping the angle of his jaw.

 

She felt him shiver, just slightly—his posture subtly stiffening beneath her touch, his eyes fluttering half-closed for a moment like he wasn’t expecting the sudden intimacy. And that was all it took to stir something in her. A small smile, barely there, tugged at the corners of her lips. Not smug. Not teasing.

 

Just… quietly full.

 

Her eyes searched his face, taking in every little detail—his golden eyes, the faint flicker of movement in his expression, the way he seemed so still now.

 

Silence settled between them again—but it wasn’t awkward or uncomfortable. It was the kind of silence that felt full, stretched tight with something unspoken, yet deeply understood. Their eyes stayed locked, neither one daring to break the connection.

 

Uzi’s hand was still on his jaw, steady, gentle, and now her thumb moved—drifting upwards until it rested over his lips.

 

She brushed it along the curve of his mouth, slow and careful, as if committing the shape of it to memory. The touch was tender, but the meaning behind it felt heavier—more vulnerable than anything she’d ever done. It made her heart race in her chest like it was trying to escape.

 

That’s when she felt his smile.

 

But not the usual kind—the bashful, nervous one he always gave when he wasn’t sure how to react. No… this one was wide, unfiltered, and real. His whole face lit up from it, like he couldn't help himself even if he tried. His eyes sparkled with warmth as he looked at her, like she was the only thing in the world that mattered. 

 

Then, he spoke.

 

Quietly. Breathily, barely above a whisper. “You’re so cute…

 

Uzi blinked once, flatly, and gave him a deadpan stare. Not from actual irritation—but reflex.

 

That tone of his, so genuine and sweet, made her stomach flip like it always did.

 

“No I’m not,” she muttered, sounding annoyed, but it was more out of instinct than conviction. 

 

N opened his mouth again, smile softening just a little. “What—yes, you—” 

 

But she didn’t let him finish.

 

She leaned in fast, cutting his sentence off completely with a kiss.

 

It was impulsive—messy in the best way—but the moment their lips met, it was like everything clicked into place.

 

She sank into it almost instantly, heart leaping as he melted right along with her. The hand still resting on his face tilted slightly, her thumb brushing his cheek as she pressed in, and she felt his arms curl a little tighter around her in return.

 

The kiss was slow—unhurried. Not rushed and impulsive like the one back at the party, not desperate and fleeting like the ones they’d shared in rare moments of overwhelming emotion.

 

This was… different. Intentional. Real.

 

They parted only slightly, just to catch a breath—but Uzi didn’t stop. She kissed him again, and again, each one drawing them closer. And when she finally tilted her head to the side, angling herself just right and guiding his face gently with her fingers, it deepened.

 

Her lips parted a bit more this time, her movements more deliberate, more sure. His hands adjusted too—one settling on the middle of her back, the other drifting up to her shoulder. He let himself be led by her, fully relaxed, fully present.

 

And for the first time all night… Uzi stopped thinking.

 

They settled into a slow, unhurried rhythm—kissing in a way that felt deliberate, almost like they were mapping out every part of this moment to remember later. Uzi let her eyes drift shut, trying to ground herself in the sensation of it all: the way his mouth moved with hers, the quiet, shaky breaths mingling in the tiny space between them.

 

Without thinking, she slid her hand from his jaw to the back of his neck. The metal there was cooler than his face, and she felt the tiniest tremor run through him when she touched it. His breath faltered, but he didn’t pull away—if anything, he just pressed closer. It was so obvious he wanted to be right here with her that it made something in her chest ache in a way that was both sweet and almost overwhelming.

 

Her palm drifted upward, fingertips brushing along the soft strands of his hair at his nape. It was soft, silky even, beneath her touch. She let herself savor that detail—something so simple and so tender—and felt her own heart fluttering in her ribs.

 

When she threaded her fingers deeper into his hair, spreading them out to cradle the back of his head, she felt him shiver again. The little reaction made her lips quirk into the smallest, almost mischievous smile against his. Just to test it, she curled her hand more firmly in the light strands and gave a slow, gentle tug.

 

That earned her something she hadn’t expected—a sharp little intake of breath, like he couldn’t quite help himself. His mouth paused on hers for half a heartbeat before he exhaled shakily and leaned back in, kissing her harder.

 

Something shifted between them then—something quiet but undeniable. Their kisses grew less tentative, less searching, and took on an edge of hunger, needier. She pressed herself against him fully, feeling every point of contact where their bodies touched: her knees brushing his thigh, her chest flush against his, her arm winding around his back tighter as if she’d never be ready to let go.

 

His arms closed around her in return. One curved over her shoulders to hold her near, the other sliding lower to pull her more firmly against him. She shivered when his hand drifted slowly up the length of her spine, the pressure feather-light but deliberate, until he settled his palm flat between her shoulder blades. He used it to guide her closer still, and she melted into it instinctively, her breath hitching in her throat.

 

Every thought she might have had—about how late it was, how ridiculous they must look, whether this was too much—just… disappeared. All that remained was this: the warmth of him wrapped around her, the soft, unhurried pressure of his mouth, and the feeling—impossible to ignore—that she didn’t want this to end.

 

Uzi's fingers tightened in his hair again—this time with more pressure, the pads of her fingers dragging slightly, her nails grazing along his scalp. It was deliberate, testing, and the sound it earned her—a faint, barely-contained whimper from N—was like oxygen to a flame.

 

…Uzi…” He murmured her name so softly, so breathlessly, that it struck something deep inside her. 

 

Robo-god. The way he said it. 

 

It wasn’t just a name anymore. It felt personal. Like a plea, a tether, a prayer. 

 

Uzi’s thoughts were already hazy, but that sound—his voice, the tension behind it, the way it trembled at the edges—sent a surge of want through her that left her needing more. Wanting closer, even though they were already pressed together like their bodies were trying to fuse. It still didn’t feel like enough. 

 

She tugged at his hair again, not sharply, but certainly firmer than before, and he responded with a sharp, shaky inhale. The sound of it, the slight arch of his back—he was reacting to her, because of her, and the sensation of that kind of vulnerability from N made her stomach flutter. 

 

Then he deepened the kiss, and everything seemed to blur. Their mouths parted wider now, moving together more fervently, and before she had time to think, she acted on instinct—pressing her tongue forward, tentative but intentional.

 

To her surprise, N responded almost immediately, his lips parting further to welcome her. His tongue met hers in a slow, careful motion—like he was unsure at first, but quickly found his rhythm. Their tongues brushed, curled slightly around each other, and Uzi gasped softly against him, the sensation raw and electrifying in a way she hadn’t known she wanted until now.

 

They stayed like that for a few breaths—sharing something more intimate than anything they’d done before—before they gradually eased back into a kiss. Slower now. Softer, but no less intense.

 

N exhaled through his nose against her skin, and the warmth of it made her shiver. She felt that breath all the way down her spine. Her own chest rose in a shaky inhale, and she let out the faintest moan—not dramatic, but impossible to hold back.

 

She clutched him tighter, her body practically burning with a need to be as close as possible, and her hand moved in his hair again. She tugged once more, and this time… she might’ve overdone it.

 

She felt him tense—not sharply, not pulling away—but enough to make her pause. His hands, which had been slowly gliding along her back, suddenly gripped the fabric of her shirt at her sides. Not rough, not firm, just… grounding. As if he needed a second to steady himself.

 

Then he gently pulled back just enough to meet her eyes. “Uzi–…” His voice, when he said her name again, came out taut—thick with emotion and tension, but not discomfort.

 

It was restraint.

 

And in that moment, Uzi’s breath hitched.

 

Her eyes widened just a little when she felt N pull back and say her name like that—so soft, so charged. Did she push too far? 

 

Her chest tightened slightly, and the rush of heat that had filled her moments ago gave way to a flicker of panic.

 

She whispered an apology almost instantly, her voice small. “Sorry,” she murmured, barely above a breath, and began gently untangling her hand from his hair.

 

She took a slow inhale, trying to get her bearings again, trying to still the chaos buzzing in her mind and through her limbs.

 

Her fingers hovered for a second before trailing down his shoulder, just to touch him somewhere—anywhere—more grounded.

 

She blinked once, then again, as if clearing fog from her vision. He was still right there. N. His golden eyes locked on hers, unwavering, a little wide and still swimming with the emotion of the moment. But they were also gentle. He was gentle. Reverent. Always was. Even now, when her pulse still hadn’t quite calmed, he looked at her like she wasn’t overwhelming—just herself. 

 

Her fingers drifted lower and tugged lightly at his sleeve, near the curve of his shoulder where his arm wrapped around her. It wasn’t a forceful pull, just a nudge—wordless. And like he knew , he responded at once, sliding his hand down to meet hers. 

Their fingers laced together automatically. A familiar, rooting gesture.

 

The touch made something flutter in Uzi’s chest again—something warm, grateful, fragile. She didn’t say anything, only looked at him. Studied his expression. His still-flushed cheeks. His slightly parted lips. The tenderness in his eyes.

 

She leaned in… or started to. Her body moved instinctively, drawn to him like a magnet—but then—

 

Wait.

 

Her mind screeched to a halt.

 

Her eyes flicked past him, just barely, catching sight of the elevator door only a few feet away. A beat passed. Then another.

 

Her whole system jolted in delayed realization.


They were in an alcove. 

 

In a hotel hallway.

 

On the same floor as all of their classmates.

 

Her processor short-circuited for a moment with panic.


What if someone stepped out of a room right now? Or came off the elevator? What if someone she knew walked by? Like Thad? Emily? A stranger? Or worse—
J?

 

Her expression faltered, the heat draining from her cheeks as the weight of reality suddenly dropped back into her lap.

 

It wasn’t that she didn’t want to keep going—robo-god, part of her wanted nothing more—but this was not the place. Not if she valued the last shreds of her dignity. 

 

Her grip on N’s hand tightened for a second—not pulling away, but more like a tether, steadying her.

 

She had to stop. For now.

 

N’s expression shifted almost instantly—like a switch flipping. That soft daze in his eyes cleared, replaced by a flash of worry.

 

He tilted his head slightly, brows pinched, his hand still intertwined with hers as he leaned forward just a little. “Uzi?” he asked quietly, his voice barely above a whisper but edged with concern. “What’s wrong?”

 

She didn’t answer at first. She couldn’t. Her thoughts were too scattered, and her chest felt like it was caught in the middle of a jolt.

 

Instead, she just sat there, blinking once, trying to pull herself together. Her gaze dropped to the floor for a moment as she inhaled deeply, trying to steady the sudden tremble in her limbs. When she looked back up, she gave the slightest shake of her head—not in denial, but to say, hold on, I just need a second. 

 

Then finally, she whispered, “We can’t… do this here.”

 

N blinked, confused for a heartbeat. But she watched it hit him. His gaze flicked up, finally taking in their surroundings again—the quiet hallway, the closed doors on either side that could open any second . The realization sunk into his face like fog burning off in the sunlight. 

 

His lips pressed into a thin line, his eyes darting away from hers briefly. Not in guilt, not even quite in embarrassment—more like regret , and mild self-reproach. Like he hadn’t even considered the risk. 

 

“Right,” he murmured, glancing away. “I should’ve… thought about that.”

 

Uzi exhaled and gave a dry, almost amused huff, shaking her head. “It’s not your fault,” she said, a bit louder this time, brushing her thumb along the back of his hand. “ I started it.” 

 

He looked back at her, his eyes widening slightly. There was a beat of silence—then his expression softened.

 

A small, lopsided smile crept onto his face, and a low laugh escaped him. “Oh, yeah,” he said with a teasing glint in his voice, as if the realization just hit him.

 

Uzi blinked, her face stiffening for a second—not from offense, but that immediate, knee-jerk guilt she didn’t really know how to process. 

 

She knew he wasn’t trying to make her feel bad. His tone was too light for that, his smile too warm, and he still hadn’t let go of her hand. But still… 

 

She might’ve let herself dwell on it more, if not for how stupidly cute his laugh was. It melted through her tension like nothing else—soft and breathy and sincere, something that made her chest feel too full and her thoughts too loud in the best way.

 

She looked down for a second, her lips pressing together like she was trying not to smile, then gave a quiet exhale through her nose.

 

Damn him. 

 

Uzi’s gaze stayed downward, but drifted toward their hands—still twined together, his thumb brushing slowly along the side of her knuckle. She shifted her fingers slightly, the metal of her joints sliding against his with a soft click as she adjusted her grip. Then, reluctantly, she looked back up at him.

 

“I should go,” she murmured, quiet but clear, her voice tinged with hesitation. “Just in case someone walks by.”

 

Her words said one thing, but everything else about her—her tone, her eyes, the slight furrow in her brow—said she didn’t want to leave at all. It wasn’t fear driving her away; it was practicality. Responsibility. And it sucked. 

 

She started to slowly pull her hand away, gently undoing their hold—but before she could fully slip free, his hand caught hers again, this time a bit more firmly.

 

Wait,” N said softly. Not urgent. Not forceful. Just… hopeful.

 

Uzi froze the second she heard his voice, her eyes flicking up to meet his like a reflex.

 

“Yeah?” she replied, her tone instinctively open, like she was already willing to listen before she even knew what he was going to say.

 

N hesitated. His gaze drifted off to the side, like he needed a second to collect his thoughts—then he looked back at her, eyes earnest.

 

“Can you stay a little longer?” he asked quietly.

 

Uzi blinked. That… wasn’t what she expected.

 

Her brow arched slightly, and her mouth parted just a bit, surprised by the request. She hesitated, not because she didn’t want to say yes—every part of her wanted to say yes—but the logical voice in the back of her mind whispered she probably shouldn’t. 

 

They were in a hotel hallway. Anything could happen. Someone could see them. 

 

She opened her mouth, about to gently decline—but N beat her to it.

 

“We don’t have to do anything else,” he said, his voice even softer than before. “I’m not expecting that. I just…” He trailed off for a moment, then looked her in the eye as he finished, “…wanna be near you. For a little longer.”

 

He gave her hand a small, careful squeeze.

 

And that was all it took.

 

Uzi’s chest clenched, the way it always did when he said something unexpectedly sincere. His voice wasn’t pleading, but there was something in it that tugged at her heart like a string—something so gentle, so full of quiet want, it made her want to forget logic altogether.

 

Her breath caught slightly. Suddenly, staying didn’t seem reckless. It felt…  necessary.

 

Uzi held his gaze, her violet eyes locked onto his. And then she noticed it— the look he was giving her. 

 

His eyes were wide and soft, just slightly tilted downward, filled with that same quiet pleading warmth he always seemed to carry when he was being vulnerable. He wasn’t even trying—he probably didn’t even realize what his expression was doing to her—but there it was . Full-on puppy dog eyes. 

 

Her heartbeat wavered for a second. Her systems might as well have short-circuited.

 

She tried not to show it. Tried not to give in.

 

She narrowed her eyes, feigning irritation, and let out an exaggerated sigh as she rolled them dramatically.

 

“…Fine,” she muttered, sounding far more annoyed than she actually was.

 

Then, with her gaze flicking away, almost as a second thought she added, “Not like I want to stay or anything.” 

 

N tilted his head slightly, blinking at her in mild confusion, clearly unsure what to make of that. But Uzi, now glancing downward, allowed a tiny smirk to tug at the corner of her mouth. She hadn’t meant it seriously—she hoped he picked up on that.

 

Just in case he didn’t, she let go of his hand and leaned forward, wrapping her arms around him again.

 

This hug was different than before. Softer. Slower. Less about urgency, more about comfort. Her arms draped gently over his shoulders, her head resting near the side of his neck. It wasn’t possessive or desperate—just close . Honest. 

 

N let out a quiet breath and hugged her back, easing into her embrace like it was second nature. Both of his arms curled around her as he nestled into her touch. He even leaned into her a little, like he was letting himself rest.

 

They stayed like that for a while, neither of them saying a word. The silence wasn’t awkward—it was warm.

 

Eventually, N pulled back just a little. Not to break the moment, but to look at her again.

 

His gaze met hers, golden eyes hazy and full of quiet affection, like he couldn’t believe she was still here. He reached up slowly, gently brushing her bangs to the side with the backs of his fingers, his touch light.

 

Then, without a word, he leaned forward and pressed a soft, tender kiss to her forehead.

 

The moment his lips left her forehead, Uzi’s face lit up in an instant.

 

Her systems might as well have overheated. Her core buzzed uncomfortably in her chest, and she felt like she couldn’t breathe.

 

How did he keep doing this to her? How did one single soft kiss turn her entire processor to static? 

 

She glared up at him, but there wasn’t a trace of real irritation in her expression—just flustered disbelief. Her brows were drawn together, and yet her mouth twitched, like it couldn’t decide if it wanted to pout or smile.

 

“…I hate you,” she muttered under her breath, barely audible. 

 

She didn’t mean it. Not even close. But still, the words came out before she could stop them—just a knee-jerk reaction to how unfair it was that he could fluster her so effortlessly. 

 

For a split second, she regretted saying it, worried it might’ve sounded a little too real.

 

But N didn’t flinch. He didn’t look wounded or even confused. Instead, he looked at her with soft, knowing eyes, the corner of his mouth curled upward in the faintest smile.

 

He understood. 

 

Without a word, he reached out again, bringing his fingers up beneath her chin.

 

Gently, almost reverently, he tilted her face toward his.

 

Uzi’s breath caught again. Her body reacted before her brain could. That warm flutter rushed through her again, and all she could do was smile—small and helpless and completely under his spell.

 

When he leaned in again, she met him halfway without hesitation. But this time, the kiss was fleeting—just a soft peck, followed by another, this one landing on her cheek.

 

And then another. And another.

 

Her face somehow managed to burn hotter with each one.

 

Stop it—” she whispered, voice cracking somewhere between a laugh and a plea, and instinctively pressed her palm to his face to push him back just a little. Not hard, just enough to make him pause. 

 

Seriously,” she murmured, not meeting his eyes now, “ Stop. Someone’s gonna see.” 

 

But even as she said it, she didn’t drop her hand from his cheek. And despite her tone, her lips were curved into a reluctant, breathless smile.

 

She didn’t want him to stop.

 

She just had to make him. 

 

As Uzi pulled her hand away from his face, she caught the look he was giving her—a full, stupidly wide smile that practically radiated affection. His eyes were half-lidded with amusement, and he gave the tiniest exhale, almost like he’d just been caught doing something he absolutely knew he shouldn’t be doing.

 

“Sorry,” he murmured, his voice low and sweet. But then, after a moment of lingering warmth between them, he added, “I can’t help myself. You’re just… you’re too adorable.” 

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes flatly. “And you’re corny.” Her tone was dry as sand, but her mouth twitched slightly at the corners.

 

N’s breath caught in a quiet laugh, the kind that made her fingers twitch with the urge to reach for him again.

 

She didn’t.

 

With visible effort, she pulled herself out of the warmth of their hug, her body reluctant to leave his—but her brain was still screaming about their very public location.

 

She sat back, leaning against the cool upholstery of the alcove couch, and scooted an inch or two away from him. Her arms folded across her chest, not in annoyance, but to physically stop herself from leaning back in.

 

She glanced sideways at him to gauge his reaction.

 

N didn’t pout. Didn’t ask why. He simply followed suit—easing back until his shoulders met the couch cushion, hands settling quietly in his lap. His eyes flicked to her briefly, and then back down. There was understanding in his expression. No guilt, no sadness—just a quiet respect for her boundaries. He seemed to know this was her way of saying she needed a moment, and he gave it to her without question.

 

A small silence bloomed between them, but it wasn’t awkward. The kind of pause that didn’t demand to be filled.

 

Still, Uzi wanted something to anchor them, something to keep the moment going without leaning back into the danger of another kiss.

 

She glanced sideways at him again.

 

“So…” she mumbled, tapping a finger against her arm, “what do you wanna talk about?”

 

She didn’t look at him when she asked it, but her voice was softer now, less defensive. Curious. Warm. It was her way of saying I’m still here. I still want this. Just… in a slightly safer format. 

 

N gave a small shrug, his shoulders rising lazily as his head tilted to the side.

 

“Anything,” he said simply, his voice calm and open.

 

Uzi turned to look at him more fully, her brow lifting in subtle skepticism. Anything, huh? 

 

The word triggered a memory—unwelcome at first. Her mind drifted back to the bus ride… to the way his voice had trembled when he said almost the same thing. But it had sounded different then. Desperate. Fractured. He’d been afraid she would walk away from him, and in that moment, he had seemed ready to spill any truth he held that she wanted to know just to keep her there. And he kind of had, hadn’t he? 

 

Her gaze flicked down for the briefest second, then back up.

 

She didn’t want to think about that. Not now. That moment had been heavy, a twisting mess of grief and honesty.

 

But this moment? This was soft. Warm. She didn’t want to sour it.

 

Choosing to steer her thoughts away from that darker place, she leaned a little closer toward him, expression shifting into something more playful.

 

“Can I ask you anything, then?” she said lightly, her tone teasing with just a trace of challenge. 

 

N turned his head, now facing her more directly, his eyes narrowing ever so slightly with a flicker of curiosity. She could tell he was trying to read her—trying to figure out where this was going. But even through that uncertainty, he nodded.

 

“Sure,” he replied, a bit slower now. Like he was bracing himself, but still willing.

 

Uzi felt a small jolt of satisfaction, but also a strange emptiness. Now what? She hadn’t actually thought this far ahead. The words had left her mouth without a plan, without an actual question in mind. It was just the first thing that popped into her head— maybe to keep him talking, maybe to keep them close. She wasn’t even sure anymore. 

 

Her fingers fidgeted in her lap, now drumming lightly against her arm. Her thoughts scrambled.

 

Was there anything I really need to ask him? Anything pressing? Anything I haven’t already guessed? 

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly in thought, not at him, but at herself. She wanted to say something meaningful, but also keep things light. Still, the moment hung there, expectant.

 

And now she had to think fast.

 

Uzi’s fingers drifted up to her chin as she tapped it lightly, eyes narrowing in thought. Her gaze unfocused as she combed through memories—old ones, recent ones, everything in between. She tried to dodge the shadows, skipping over moments soaked in tension or sadness, but it was impossible not to brush against them.

 

Still, after a few long seconds of internal rummaging, two particular questions rose to the surface. Quiet ones. Ones she hadn’t voiced before—but lingered often in the back of her mind, one more recent than the other.

 

She turned her head again to glance at N.

 

He was watching her with quiet focus, clearly picking up on the shift in her demeanor. His posture had subtly shifted, and though he didn’t say anything, he looked ready—like he was bracing himself for something serious.

 

“…So,” she started, voice cautious. “This might seem kind of random. But I’ve been… confused about something.”

 

His head tilted slightly, but he didn’t interrupt.

 

Uzi swallowed softly, her throat feeling tight for some reason. “I’m not mad, okay?” she added quickly, lifting a hand and gesturing vaguely, like waving away any imagined defensiveness. “I promise I’m not upset anymore about… everything. It’s just something I keep thinking about.”

 

She blinked, then looked away, the shift in her expression almost imperceptible but significant. Her voice softened, but there was a weight behind it.

 

“Back when I found out about… her,” she muttered, knowing that she didn’t have to specify. 

 

Even just saying that made her chest twist a little, but she pushed through it. 

 

“I started wondering—back before all that, before I knew anything about it—you’d said something to me. You said you used to like V… right? For a long time?”  She risked a glance at him but immediately looked away again. “And there were those letters. The ones you put in my locker by accident… the ones meant for her. Overall, you made it seem like it wasn’t just a passing crush…”  

 

The words sat between them, heavy but not accusatory. She wasn’t confronting him—her tone made that clear. If anything, she sounded conflicted. Not angry. Just vulnerable.

 

She was confused on the fact that he seemed so adamant about liking V since they were young, but then he also liked some other girl in between that? It didn’t make sense. She hadn’t directly thought about this since she found out about the other drone, but it had been weighing in the back of her mind. 

 

And even though she wasn’t looking directly at him, her shoulders were ever-so-slightly tense, bracing for what he might say next.

 

When Uzi finally lifted her gaze, she found N looking far more… embarrassed?—than she’d expected. His posture had stiffened slightly, his lips drawn into a flat line, and his expression—normally so open—was suddenly tight with unease. He looked away, bringing a hand up to rub the back of his neck, clearly trying to figure out how to explain something that was… messy.

 

“…It’s… complicated,” he admitted quietly, voice tinged with discomfort. His eyes flicked toward her for a moment, then dropped again. “I always kind of liked her. Since we were kids.” There was something reluctant in the way he said it, like he didn’t enjoy saying the words aloud, like maybe he was ashamed of them now.

 

“But then… there was her for a little bit. Until…” He hesitated, the sentence drifting off like a breath left unfinished. Uzi didn’t need the rest. She knew who he was referencing.

 

There was a silence before N cleared his throat and continued, more cautiously this time. “After that, I think I started liking V again. Not in the same way, not like it was some big romantic thing… to an extent. I think it was just…” He searched for the words. “She gets it, y’know? She understands me in a way most drones can’t. We grew up side by side, and she’s—well, she’s a disassembly drone too. She’s seen the same things I have. We’ve overall been through a lot. It felt… inevitable, I guess.”

 

Uzi listened quietly, trying not to show anything on her face. She didn’t want him to stop. She wanted to hear it all—every awkward, vulnerable, half-formed sentence. But then—

 

“But,” N added softly, “the thing is… she’s not really my type. So I never fully understood why I liked her so much.”

 

That brought Uzi’s thoughts to a screeching halt.

 

She blinked. Her head tilted just slightly. Not really his type? The words echoed in her mind with a flutter she couldn’t explain. Her processors stuttered. Before she could stop herself, the question slipped out, soft and unintentional. 

 

“…So I’m your type?” 

 

As soon as the words left her mouth, her eyes widened a fraction. She hadn’t meant to say that aloud. She stiffened slightly, lips pressing together, clearly wishing she could take it back.

 

N blinked in surprise, clearly not expecting Uzi’s quiet question. His gaze darted away almost immediately, and even in the low lighting, Uzi could see the faint flush creeping across his face—a soft pink blooming over pale plating.

 

He opened his mouth, but no sound came out at first. Then, after a second of gathering his words, he managed a hesitant, “Yeah…”

 

Uzi scoffed under her breath, turning away quickly, her arms folding tighter. She tried to seem unimpressed, tried not to let it show how deeply those few letters had burrowed into her chest like a virus. But the warmth crawling up her neck betrayed her, and she had no doubt the heat had found its way to her face too.

 

There was a pause between them again. Not awkward, just… fragile. Charged.

 

Then N spoke again, a little quieter this time. “And also, I… I’m not sure it would’ve ever worked out anyways…”

 

She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye.

 

“…because I don’t think V’s really into guys.”

 

Uzi blinked. That wasn’t what she expected to hear. 

 

Her eyes shifted back to him fully, curiosity overtaking the quiet buzz of flustered energy that had just started to settle. She didn’t speak—waiting.

 

N seemed to realize how that sounded a second too late.

 

He straightened a little, eyes going wide, and quickly rushed out an explanation. “Not that that’s a bad thing! I mean—it doesn’t bother me or anything, it’s just… I don’t know. The guys she’s dated, it’s never really worked out. She always seemed distant, or bored, or just… not really there.”

 

He rubbed his hand against the side of his leg nervously. “And she doesn’t talk about that stuff. Like, at all. We tell each other pretty much everything else, but her love life? That’s the one thing she always shuts down. So I never really knew for sure.”

 

Uzi studied him for a moment—his genuine awkwardness, his slight panic, how fast he’d scrambled to make sure she didn’t take it the wrong way. And surprisingly, she didn’t. She could tell he wasn’t being judgmental. Just honest.

 

Still, her brows lifted slightly, processing everything. Part of her was still reeling from the quiet ‘…yeah’ he’d given her earlier. The rest was quietly filing this new information away, unsure what to make of it yet.

 

Uzi leaned back slightly, arms still crossed but the tension in her posture lessened, replaced by a growing amusement. She thought about it more, the way N had stumbled through his explanation, clearly trying not to offend, made her want to roll her eyes and laugh at the same time.

 

It was so him—awkward, sincere, and unintentionally sweet.

 

She let out a short, amused scoff through her nose.

 

N blinked at her. His brows furrowed. “What?”

 

Uzi just shrugged, her smirk tugging at the corner of her mouth. “Nothing,” she replied casually. “Just the way you said all that. It was funny.”

 

His expression twisted in confusion, part flustered, part indignant. “Funny how?” He didn’t seem genuinely upset though, just a bit unsure.

 

Before he could press it further, she reached out and gave him a playful nudge to the shoulder, cutting him off. “Relax,” she said with a grin.

 

Then her tone shifted, soft but more serious. “I’ve still got one more question.”

 

N nodded, before his posture straightened just barely. His smile faltered, and he seemed to brace himself slightly, as if preparing for something heavy. His fingers tapped against his thigh once before going still.

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes a little—not accusingly, but focused. She hesitated before speaking again, her tone slower now. “I’ve kinda been wondering about this for a while…”

 

She bit the inside of her cheek. It wasn’t like this was a big deal, not really. But she was curious. And… maybe it’d been sticking in her head more than she realized.

 

“Do you remember a while back?” she asked. “Like… the week after we met. That night we went to the bowling alley? And then we ended up at Rebecca’s house?”

 

N turned to look at her fully, his expression scrunched in slight confusion as he sifted through the memory. After a beat, he nodded. “Yeah…?”

 

He sounded uncertain, like he wasn’t sure where she was going with this. And honestly, neither was she—at least not yet.

 

But she knew what she wanted to ask.

 

Uzi shifted her weight slightly on the couch, leaning toward him a bit as the memory came into sharper focus. Her tone grew more pointed—but not hostile.

 

“Okay, then do you remember what happened after we got to Rebecca’s?” she asked. “When the power went out and everyone started playing paranoia?”

 

As soon as the words left her mouth, she caught the flicker of realization snap across N’s face. His eyes widened slightly, and he blinked as if he’d just been smacked with a sudden wave of clarity.

 

Uzi smirked. Jackpot.

 

She narrowed her eyes at him with mock suspicion, leaning forward with a raised brow. “What did Rebecca ask you?” she demanded playfully. “And why the hell did you say my name out of everyone?” 

 

N froze.

 

His face blanked for half a second, like he’d just short-circuited. That made her smirk grow sharper. She could practically see the gears turning behind his eyes as he scrambled to come up with something—or more likely just to remember what exactly happened that night.

 

She remembered it clearly. It had nagged at her for a while—not in a dramatic way, but more like an unresolved itch.

 

That moment in the car, the awkward tension, how flustered he got when she asked what Rebecca had whispered to him. He’d danced around the answer, clearly embarrassed, and she hadn’t pushed it then… but now? She had her opening.

 

And then, unexpectedly… N… laughed

 

Not nervously, not awkwardly—just a soft, quiet, genuine laugh, like he was surprised by his own memory. He shook his head and glanced down at his lap, lips tugging upward.

 

“That seems so stupid now,” he murmured as he shook his head slightly, his voice carrying an air of fond disbelief.

 

Uzi blinked.

 

She wasn’t sure what kind of reaction she’d expected—denial, maybe, or more flustered dodging. But this? This quiet amusement? It threw her off a little… and made her all the more curious.

 

She tilted her head slightly, her smirk dimming into a more thoughtful expression.

 

Whatever it was, it clearly wasn’t something he regretted—but the question remained.

 

What exactly had been said that night? 

 

N looked back at her with a casual shrug, but the small, sheepish curve of his mouth hinted at something more bashful beneath the surface. “Rebecca asked me… if I had to kiss someone in the room, who would it be,” he admitted, a little quieter than usual. “And if the shoe landed face-up, I had to kiss whoever I picked. She dared me.” 

 

Uzi blinked at him.

 

What?

 

She opened her mouth, about to ask something, but he kept going, clearly wanting to get through the explanation before she had time to react too much.

 

“I couldn’t say Rebecca—she’s the one who asked me the question, so that would’ve been weird.” He waved his hand vaguely. “And I wasn’t about to say Thad or Darren. Not… really my thing. Plus, y’know… Darren’s dating Rebecca, and Thad is just… Thad.”

 

That got a soft laugh out of Uzi. She didn’t even try to stop it.

 

N smiled faintly at the sound before continuing, his eyes drifting slightly away as he spoke—like he was mentally placing himself back in that dim, awkward room.

 

“So that left Emily. And you.”

 

He glanced at Uzi when he said that, gauging her reaction.

 

But then he went on, voice even but laced with a slight cringe. “Don’t get me wrong, I think Emily’s great. Like, she’s pretty and all… I guess. But really not my type. Honestly, even less than V.” He scratched his head, and his mouth twisted into a lopsided expression. “And also, she talks a lot about saving her first kiss for marriage, because of her religious views—which, like… I respect, totally. So that made it even worse. I couldn’t do that to her.” 

 

Uzi’s expression had slowly shifted from playful to genuinely intrigued.

 

N exhaled slowly, almost like he was bracing for judgment. “So… that left you.”

 

Her brow arched slightly, and his voice turned quieter—gentler. “But even that felt weird at the time. We’d known each other for what? A few days? I didn’t want to make anything awkward. Plus, I still liked V back then…” 

 

Uzi sat there in silence for a moment, processing.

 

Then she froze.

 

Out of all the answers she might’ve expected, that hadn’t been one of them.

 

Her mind stalled, trying to piece together why her chest suddenly felt tight and hot and confused.

 

There hadn’t been a trace of regret in his tone. He wasn’t saying it like he wished he’d picked someone else. If anything, he seemed more embarrassed about the context than the choice itself. And somewhere deep in Uzi’s chest, there was that flicker again—that warm, now familiar twist that she hadn’t quite figured out how to name. 

 

She ended up thinking back to that night, remembering the look on his face when Rebecca whispered that question to him—how his posture stiffened, how he looked like he'd rather vanish than speak. At the time, yeah she thought it was weird, but she didn’t question it much after that night, other than the fleeting, curious thought every now and then.

 

But now that she knew? It made so much more sense.

 

He was really lucky the shoe didn’t land face-up, she thought dryly. If it had… he would've had to kiss her. And back then, with how new everything was between them? That would've been... so weird. 

 

She paused.

 

Actually, would it have been?

 

Uzi frowned to herself, turning her gaze away from him and staring off as her thoughts spiraled a bit. In all honesty, yeah—at the time, she definitely would have felt weird about it. 

 

Not because N was strange or gross or anything. He was nice, sweet even. She’d liked him right away, as a friend. He made her laugh. He made her feel noticed, seen.

 

But back then?

 

That kind of thing—a kiss, something so... loaded—it was too much. 

 

She’d only ever kissed two other drones in her entire life. And even those barely counted.

 

The first was some guy she didn’t even remember the name of—part of a stupid party game. The kiss wasn’t romantic. It wasn’t intimate. It was more like a dare with extra steps. Everyone had laughed. She remembered wishing they hadn't.

 

The second was a girl from middle school—quiet, artistic, kind of awkward in a way that made Uzi feel comfortable around her. They’d liked each other, or at least they thought they did. It was a shy little peck behind the school building one day after class. It lasted all of half a second. 

 

Then Uzi had to move because of her dad’s  stupid job, and she never saw the girl again. No goodbye. No closure. She sometimes wondered what might’ve happened if she’d stayed… 

 

But that wasn’t the kind of memory she wanted to dwell on now.

 

Uzi shook her head, pushing it away.

 

There was a strange tension in her chest now—half nerves, half something else she didn’t want to label yet. N had been telling the truth, she was sure of that. And if he’d picked her out of everyone, even back then…

 

She glanced back at him out of the corner of her eye. He looked calm now, like that awkward admission had somehow taken a weight off his shoulders.

 

But for Uzi, her thoughts spiraled fast and sharp, a quiet storm behind her eyes.

 

What if it did happen? 

 

If that kiss had actually happened back then—right after they’d met—it would’ve wrecked her. There was no doubt about it. 

 

The awkwardness alone would’ve been unbearable. That was just how she was built—when things got too uncomfortable, she ran, or at least kept her distance. It didn’t take much to make her retreat into herself, especially when her feelings got tangled.

 

And N? Back then, he barely knew her. There wouldn’t have been any reason for him to chase after her, to try and fix the tension. Not when he already had a tight-knit friend group. Not when he clearly had feelings for V.

 

So if things had gone that way… if he’d kissed her in front of everyone that night—it would’ve ruined everything before it even began. 

 

And she’d just reconnected with Thad around that time too… And Thad was always with N. Their whole group was so annoyingly interconnected… so there’d have been no way to avoid N without also losing everyone else in the group she’d just started feeling comfortable around. And she would’ve lost Thad right after getting him back… 

 

That realization made her stomach twist.

 

In another life, she probably would’ve begged her dad to move again—something she’d never willingly suggested before. But just to escape the humiliation? Yeah. That sounded like something she’d do. 

 

Uzi gave a small shiver without realizing it.

 

It would’ve been a complete disaster. 

 

The weight of that alternate possibility settled in her chest, and for a second, she forgot where she was. Forgot that she wasn’t trapped in that version of events. That none of it had actually happened.

 

“Hey, Uzi…?” when N softly spoke her name—cautious, unsure—only then did she jolt back to the present.

 

She blinked and looked at him. He was watching her closely, head tilted, his brows slightly drawn together. The concern on his face was subtle, but sincere.

 

She realized she must’ve gone quiet for too long.

 

Right. Reality. She was here now. Things were different. N was still beside her. And nothing had been ruined. 

 

Uzi felt a wave of embarrassment hit her as the realization set in—she’d completely zoned out.

 

Her eyes blinked back into focus, and she gave a faint shake of her head, muttering,“My bad… I was just thinking about how badly that could’ve gone.” Her voice was low, almost sheepish.

 

N gave a small, dry laugh, one of those breathy, almost-laughs that slipped out when you weren’t sure whether something was funny or just uncomfortable. “Yeah…” he agreed quietly, nodding once.

 

A stillness passed between them again. Not tense, but thoughtful.

 

Then N’s voice cut through it, soft but sure. “I’m glad it didn’t.”

 

Uzi turned her head a little, her eyes flicking toward him. She nodded, just barely.

 

And then he added, “Because if it had… we wouldn’t be here right now.”

 

That made her pause.

 

She blinked, confused for a beat—until she felt the warmth of his hand sliding into hers.

 

She glanced down at the contact. His fingers were gentle but certain around hers, and without thinking, she laced her fingers with his in return. No hesitation. It felt… right. Easy.

 

When she looked back up at him, his expression was soft. Earnest.

 

“I’m really glad we’re here,” he said, squeezing her hand gently. “That we’ve come this far. Together.”

 

That last word— together —hit her like a quiet thud in her chest. 

 

Together.

 

Uzi's lips pressed into a thin, unreadable line. That word wasn’t foreign, but suddenly it felt too big. Too heavy.

 

What did ‘together’ mean? 

 

They weren’t dating. Not officially. No labels. No declarations. Nothing solid they’d agreed upon. They’d kissed, yeah—but so what? Kisses didn’t equal definitions. And they’d never said boyfriend. Girlfriend. Partner. None of it.

 

Probably because she was terrified to bring it up.

 

The idea of asking him felt like stepping off a cliff she wasn’t sure had ground at the bottom. She’d never been with anyone like that before. Not really. Flings that amounted to nothing? Sure. Quick moments, scattered and uncertain. 

 

But nothing that ever meant something.

 

Nothing that made her care this much. 

 

And she didn’t want to say something and ruin what they had. She didn’t want to ruin him. 

 

Were they dating?

 

No. She didn’t think so. 

 

But the worst part was—she wasn’t even sure if that was what she wanted. Or if she just wasn’t ready for what it might mean. 

 

And now definitely wasn’t the time to figure it out. Not when they were sitting under a dark sky, tired, strung out from everything else. Out in the open, like some kind of cinematic moment she didn’t know how to live in. 

 

She told herself it was about timing.

 

But deep down, she knew she was just making up excuses for herself.

 

Excuses to avoid asking the question that might give her an answer she wasn’t ready for.

 

So instead of saying anything—anything about them, or what they were—Uzi leaned to the side. 

 

Not a big gesture. Not dramatic. Just a small shift of weight as she scooted a little closer to N, her shoulder brushing his before she rested her head gently against him. His frame was warm, steady, and familiar in a way she didn’t have the words for.

 

“I’m glad, too,” she murmured.

 

That was all she could give him right now.

 

But it was honest.

 

N didn’t say anything in return. He didn’t need to. He simply gave her hand a light squeeze—gentle, grounding. A quiet ‘I’m here’ without saying a word.

 

Uzi let herself relax into the moment, her eyes fixed on the window as the dark sky stretched wide beyond them. The stars looked especially clear tonight, faint pinpricks scattered like someone had poked holes through velvet.

 

Her thoughts slowed down. Her body started to feel heavier.

 

She could fall asleep like this. Easily.

 

Then something flickered in the sky.

 

A quick streak—bright, fast, gone in an instant.

 

A shooting star.

 

Uzi’s eyes followed it lazily. She didn’t plan to say anything—just made a small mental note to herself: That was kinda cool. The sort of quiet, background observation that didn’t need to be talked about. 

 

But of course, N broke the silence.

 

He lifted his right hand, the one that wasn’t holding hers, and pointed quickly, “Did you see that?” he asked, a light excitement in his voice. She could hear the smile in it.

 

Uzi huffed through her nose in faint amusement, but didn’t lift her head. “Yeah,” she muttered, eyes still on the window. “Shooting star.”

 

N shifted beside her, pulling his arm back from where it had been resting behind her. “We have to make a wish,” he said with a soft sort of urgency, like it was something that mattered. 

 

Uzi blinked, the faintest trace of a smirk pulling at her mouth. “What?”

 

“Make a wish,” N repeated, nodding, as if that explained everything. His tone was still quiet, but there was something boyishly enthusiastic about it.

 

Uzi gave a small snort, lifting her brow slightly. “Do I need instructions for that? Is there, like… a step-by-step guide?”

 

N chuckled, the corners of his eyes crinkling with amusement.

 

Uzi didn’t move her head off his shoulder, but her sarcasm was warm this time—not sharp, just teasing. She didn’t get the whole wish thing, but watching how seriously he took it… it was kind of endearing.  

 

N gave a small shrug, clearly undeterred by Uzi’s sarcastic tone. “I guess there is a process,” he said, tilting his head slightly. “You gotta say the rhyme. You know—‘Star light, star bright, first star I see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might—’” 

 

He didn’t get any further before Uzi reached up and gave his shoulder a sharp pinch.


Ow—! N flinched instinctively, sitting up straighter. His arm twitched from the reflex. “What was that for?” 

 

Uzi didn’t lift her head from where it still rested against him. Her tone was dry, but laced with amusement. “You’re such a cornball.” 

 

He blinked. “What—?”

 

She cut him off again, but this time with a soft, wordless kiss pressed to his cheek.

 

It was quick, simple—barely a second long—but N froze completely, his eyes going wide in stunned silence. 

 

“Just make your dumb wish,” she muttered, almost fondly. “And shut up.”

 

N didn’t respond verbally. But after a moment, she felt his fingers tighten lightly around hers, then begin tracing gentle, repetitive motions with his thumb over the back of her hand. Soft, rhythmic. Thoughtless, but comforting.

 

Uzi allowed herself a small, almost sleepy smile. The touch was grounding in the best way. Like he was tethering her to the moment, even if neither of them really knew where they stood, or where they were going.

 

She exhaled slowly through her nose, watching the sky outside the window again.

 

Part of her still wanted to roll her eyes at the whole ‘make a wish’ thing… but after a while, with the quiet hum of the night and the steady warmth of his hand in hers, she found herself actually wondering what she would wish for.

 

She didn’t say anything for a long time.

 

Then, without looking up, her voice barely above a murmur, she asked, “What’d you wish for?”

 

There was a pause. N didn’t answer right away. She could feel him shift just a little beside her, not in discomfort—just in thought.

 

Then, softly: “Can’t tell you.”

 

Uzi raised an eyebrow but still didn’t move. “Why not?”

 

“If I say it,” he said, “it won’t come true.”

 

Classic.

 

Uzi let out a small breath of something between a sigh and a laugh. Of course that’s what he’d say. But somehow… she didn’t mind. Not tonight. Not while sitting next to him, her hand in his, the sky wide open in front of them. 

 

And maybe, for just a second, she thought she wouldn’t mind if that wish came true, too.

Notes:

AHHHHHAHJAJ

I think this is the longest chapter written to date

I normally would break it up into parts, but like I wasn’t gonna do that to yall 🥲

Gonna make this authors notes short cuz yall are probably tired of reading 😭

This chapter took me a total of like… I kid you not, 6-8 hours to write. This is including today and yesterday btw

Hope it was worth the 2 week wait 😩 what’d yall think of this?? I wanna hear y’all’s thoughts 🤭

 

Next chapter should be posted like… Wednesday or Thursday? Ik that seems like a while but like, it’s better than two weeks 🤷

Okay that’s pretty much everything. BYEEE!!! 🫶🫶

-

EDIT: Okay I lied. I’m itching to yap abt this chapter, I didn’t have the time yesterday so I’m js gonna do it now. Skip this if u want, idrc, I js NEED to get my thoughts out 😭

Okay first, sorry if there’s a bunch of typos. Since this chapter is so long, I think I messed up a bunch of words, and there’s parts that don’t make sense. I was running on like 5 hours of sleep when I wrote it BUT THAYS NOT AN EXCUSE I’m sorry 😭😭 I went back and edited *some* of it today, but I’ll do more if I have to

Okay, now for my actual commentary…
(This won’t be in chronological order of the chapter btw)

Yk the part where Uzi like, sees the window and is like ‘omg did N ask me to meet here cuz of the view, that’s so sweet 🥺’ Ill js say no, no he didn’t. LMAO js cuz Uzi thinks something *doesnt* make it true. This is from her POV after all, so she can assume what she wants abt anything in any context, but again doesnt make it true. Also I js think it’s funnier if N literally had no plans ahead of time and js randomly thought the alcove would be a good place, not cuz he thought Uzi would like it 🥲 though that does seem like something he would do

And then omg, Uzi *finally* fucking apologized to him 😭 even if it was only a few hours, and that doesn’t seem like that long, that was a *major* thing for her. I feel like she would be shit at admitting when she’s at fault, maybe it’s like a defense thing? Ugh she seriously needs to talk to someone abt this 😒

Oh and abt her character, I’m trying really hard to keep her as much in character as I can. I get that at this point all the characters have their own kinda more in depth characterization (not saying that they’re not in depth in the show, they totally are, but I mean specifically in this universe cuz it’s obvi an AU. Yes, they’re the same characters, but I have to write/adapt how they would act in this specific setting under the specific circumstances they’re in, yk? Does that make sense?)

I really like writing Uzi cuz she’s really interesting. For example, during the guess who thing- I could’ve made her js turn around and hug N or som cuz aww cute or wtv, but that didn’t seem like something she’d do at all. In my opinion I feel like she’d get pissed off cuz she doesn’t like being scared like that, even if at the same time, she was happy that it was N.

OKAY WAIT HOLD UP I ran out of characters so I had to delete some stuff. I’m js gonna copy and paste the rest I had into a comment cuz like… I really feel like I need to say it. If u want to go read that go ahead, but u don’t have to. I’m really js writing it cuz why not, nothing crazy important other than again, commentary. Gonna go comment it rn and finish up the authors notes there!! 🥲

Chapter 90: Gash

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi’s eyes fluttered open slowly, her gaze unfocused at first as she tried to reorient herself. The ceiling above her looked unfamiliar in the early light—a pale beige with faint, dotted textures—and for a moment, she couldn’t place where she was.

 

Her fingers instinctively flexed against the fabric beneath them, the blanket crinkling softly between her hands. Her body was stiff, groggy, reluctant to wake.

 

She sat up with a small groan and rubbed at her eyes. It took a few seconds before it all clicked into place.

 

Right… the hotel room. 

 

She sat up, dragging a hand across her face, rubbing the residual heaviness from her eyes. Her mind was still fogged from sleep, but it all began piecing itself together again.

 

Last night… she’d ended up sitting beside N for a long while after their conversation, her head on his shoulder and hands tangled together in silence. And then, eventually, she’d made herself leave—reluctantly. She hadn’t wanted to risk dozing off and being found like that, curled up with him in the shadowed alcove.

 

Still, now that morning had come, she almost regretted it. Part of her ached at the thought of how easy it would’ve been to stay with him. To have let herself drift off at his side and worry about consequences later. But that wasn’t reality. She knew better. She had to know better. 

 

She sighed softly, then she let her eyes drift across the room, instinctively scanning for any sign of the others.

 

Lizzy’s bed was beside hers—empty. The covers were loosely pulled back into place, half-made like she’d gotten up in a rush but still bothered to make it look somewhat decent. There was a spilled plastic bag of hair ties on top of it, the garish, neon colors splayed out like candy. Uzi squinted. It was way too early to be assaulted by that many bright pinks, neon yellows and electric greens.

 

She wondered vaguely why that was there—why Lizzy had brought that many with her, or why they were now scattered like some miniature, rubbery battlefield. Lizzy wasn’t exactly the type to fumble stuff. Maybe she had left in a hurry. Maybe something happened.

 

Regardless, Uzi couldn’t care less.

 

She let her eyes wander further, toward the farthest bed.

 

J’s.

 

Unlike Lizzy’s, J’s bed looked… pristine. Not just ‘neatly made,’ but precisely made. Every fold was crisp. Every corner was tucked. The blanket stretched flat like it had never even been touched. It didn’t look slept in—it looked arranged. Staged. 

 

And somehow, that made Uzi uncomfortable.

 

If it were any other drone, maybe she’d admire the neatness. Maybe it would even guilt her into tidying her own mess of a bed more often. But because it was J, it didn’t feel tidy. It felt strategic. Cold. Almost surgical. 

 

The perfection of it made Uzi’s stomach twist—not from guilt, but from unease. It reminded her that nothing J did was without reason. That even something as mundane as a blanket could feel like a message, like a quiet warning.

 

Uzi’s eyes lingered on it a second longer before she finally looked away. She let out a quiet, tired sigh. At least no one was in the room right now—that gave her a few more minutes of peace.

 

Or so she thought.

 

She turned to her right—

 

—and practically jumped out of her skin.

 

V was right there, standing far too close with her arms folded, silently watching her like a scarecrow. 

 

Uzi yelped, instinctively jerking back—and in doing so, cracked the back of her head against the wooden headboard.

 

OW—what the hell?!” 

 

She clutched the sore spot with a wince, her whole expression scrunched in pained irritation. Once the sting dulled, she glared up at V with the kind of deadpan that said you’re lucky I don’t have anything to launch at your face right now

 

V, as usual, looked completely unfazed.

 

Uzi groaned groggily, still rubbing her head. “Why are you just standing there like that? Creepy much?” 

 

V raised a brow, not even blinking. “I was gonna wake you up.”

 

Uzi squinted at her, trying to process that through the haze of morning fog in her brain. “Wake me up how—with a heart attack?!” 

 

V shrugged, not even remotely sorry. “I just came out of the bathroom and saw you were awake. Figured I’d tell you you’ve got, like, five minutes before you need to be downstairs.”

 

That woke Uzi up faster than any alarm.

 

She bolted upright, posture suddenly rigid. “Five minutes? Seriously?! ” 

 

V nodded with a completely neutral expression and then casually moved to her own bed, plopping down and casually picking her shoes up off the ground to put on, as if she hadn’t just traumatized Uzi seconds earlier.

 

Uzi sat there blinking, trying to catch up with reality while her mind spun in a frenzy.

 

Five minutes. Five. Minutes. She hadn't even brushed her hair. Or her teeth. Or even figured out what she was supposed to be doing downstairs. 

 

Maybe she could just self destruct. That seemed like a much more preferable option to right now. 

 

She muttered something under her breath that might’ve been a curse as she scrambled out of bed like she was being hunted, practically diving to the floor in search of her bag. Her fingers clutched at the straps under the nightstand before yanking it out, grabbing the first change of clothes and her hygiene pouch without even checking to see if they matched. Her systems were still booting up, but panic was in full control.

 

V was already by the door, ready to leave, but Uzi barely registered her silhouette in the corner of her vision. She dashed past her, practically slamming the bathroom door shut behind her, chest heaving like she’d just run a marathon. 

 

There was no time to think. She ripped off her pajamas and yanked on the clothes she grabbed without hesitation: a faded, off-grey tank top covered in scattered dark grey stars, a soft velour zip-up hoodie that was slightly too warm for indoors but comfortable enough to ignore, and a pair of dark blue denim shorts with a rhinestone BB belt she’d impulsively packed because it made her look like she had her life together.

 

She usually spent a good ten minutes figuring out accessories—earrings, layered necklaces, which rings to wear out of the excessive amount she owned—but that clearly wasn’t happening this morning. Time was not on her side. 

 

She tossed her pajamas into a heap on the bathroom floor—future-Uzi’s problem—and glanced up at the mirror. 

 

And immediately groaned.

 

Her hair looked like it had lost a battle with a tornado. Her bangs were sticking up in strange angles, the strands around her face tangled and puffed like she’d been static-charged in her sleep. “Of course,” she muttered under her breath, dragging a hand down her face in defeat. 

 

She attempted to finger-comb it first, hoping maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.

 

Big mistake. 

 

Her fingers snagged in one of the knots and she nearly ripped a chunk out trying to detangle it.

 

OW—okay, no, we’re not doing that,” she hissed.

 

She yanked open her hygiene pouch and grabbed her brush with the desperation of someone on a five-minute countdown to social humiliation. She began dragging it through the tangles with rapid, jerky movements, trying to ignore the sound of bristles catching and her own growing frustration.

 

Why today of all days? Why couldn’t she wake up looking semi-presentable once in her life? 

 

Her reflection stared back with a sleep-deprived glare. Disheveled, messy, overwhelmed—and with five minutes to make it all disappear.

 

Uzi didn’t even spare herself the luxury of thinking—just moved in a frenzy. She cupped her hands beneath the sink and splashed cold water on her face, hoping the sting would shock her into functioning. No soap, no routine. Just damage control. She patted herself dry with the nearest towel, dragging it across her face and neck with little grace, and tossed it aside without thinking.

 

Next: teeth. She fumbled with her toothbrush, nearly dropping it into the sink in her rush. Toothpaste hit the bristles in a crooked line, and she brushed like she had seconds left to live—rough, fast, and nowhere near thorough. Her hand was a blur. She rinsed with equal urgency and—unintentionally—sent a small explosion of water across the counter and mirror, droplets catching on her hoodie and the edge of her bag. She winced at the mess, wiping her mouth with the back of her sleeve as if that’d somehow make it better. 

 

Now that she was done with something she couldn’t even consider a hygiene routine, she shoved her brush and toothbrush back in the bag. All she had to do now was grab everything and move

 

She snatched her bag and the messy bundle of pajamas off the floor in one swipe, threw the bathroom door open with a loud slam, and bolted across the room. 

 

Her bed was still unmade, but there was no time to fix that either. She dumped the clothes and bag onto the bed and quickly yanked the blanket over the whole mess to at least make it look like she had her act together. 

 

Her body paused—just for a moment. She breathed in, chest rising and falling fast.

 

Maybe she could salvage this morning.

 

Maybe— 

 

She reached for the doorknob, hand trembling slightly—

 

—and stopped cold.

 

Her eyes dropped to her feet.

 

Purple. Bat. Socks. 

 

The same ridiculous ones she’d slept in, staring up at her like a cosmic joke.

 

Her face twisted in disbelief. “No way,” she muttered through clenched teeth before spinning on her heel and racing back to the bed. She practically threw herself at the floor to snatch up her boots, tugging them on with practiced speed. No time for laces—she just shoved her feet in and hoped for the best. They weren’t tight, but she could deal with that later. 

 

She snatched her phone off the nightstand—another near miss—and bolted for the door again.

 

Heart pounding. Shoes untied. Brain still halfway asleep. But at least she wasn’t barefoot…

 

Uzi burst into the hallway in a blur of motion, nearly tripping over her own untied laces. Each step felt like a gamble—one wrong angle and she’d eat floor.

 

She flailed briefly, arms stiff out at her sides like a poorly balanced teeter totter, before managing to steady herself with a huff.

 

The hallway was completely empty.

 

That… wasn’t great.

 

She skidded to a brief stop, breathing fast, glancing left and right like maybe—just maybe—someone would appear and reassure her that she wasn’t horrendously behind. 

 

But no one did.

 

The stillness pressed in all around her.

 

Uzi grimaced. That couldn’t be good. Everyone must’ve already gone down. 

 

A flash of embarrassment tingled in her chest as she started sprinting again. She knew she looked like an absolute mess—bedhead only half-tamed, hoodie slightly askew, boots slapping loudly against the carpeted floor. But no one was around to see it, so that humiliation stayed mostly internal.

 

Third day of the trip, she thought bitterly. What was even on the schedule today? 

 

Her brain scrambled to dig it up as she turned a corner, adrenaline still coursing through her wires.

 

Another museum, right? Or was today the free day? She could’ve sworn there was one. Maybe. That had to be today or tomorrow—but her memory was foggy from how quickly she’d rolled out of bed and thrown herself into survival mode. 

 

Doesn’t matter. If I don’t get down there now, I’m gonna miss literally everything. 

 

She caught sight of the elevators up ahead and picked up her pace, breathing heavier now. Her gaze briefly flicked to the left, past the elevators—where a certain recessed corner of the hallway sat empty.

 

The alcove.

 

A warm flutter stirred in her stomach despite the urgency clawing at her mind.

 

Just the sight of it—the memory of last night still lingering, like a phantom touch—made her heart lift slightly. That’s where she’d sat with N. Just the two of them, quiet, close, hidden.

 

Focus. She shook her head. Later. Stop getting distracted by him. 

 

She reached the elevator and jammed the down button in rapid succession, like sheer force would make it appear faster. Her foot tapped anxiously. Time ticked like a threat.

 

Finally, the doors slid open.

 

Empty. Perfect. 

 

She jumped in, hit the button for the first floor with just as much frantic energy, and let out a breath when the doors sealed shut behind her. The quiet hum of the elevator kicking into motion echoed around her as her heart continued to race—not just from running, but from everything all at once.

 

She barely even knew what she was hurrying into. But she had to get there fast.

 

The soft mechanical tick of the elevator numbers crawled downward, far too slow for Uzi’s liking.

 

4.


3.

 

She huffed through her nose and finally bent down, reaching for one of her untied shoelaces—might as well fix it before she actually tripped in front of everyone downstairs. Her fingers had barely brushed the string when the elevator jerked to a stop and let out a ding

 

Wait— 2 ?

 

She froze. Had she pressed the wrong floor?

 

Her eyes widened slightly as the doors slid open. Oh my robo-god, I’m such an idiot— 

 

But then, instead of the mortifying realization that she’d accidentally doomed herself to the wrong floor, someone stepped into the elevator.

 

An older drone, definitely an adult—mid-thirties maybe, or older. He had brown, neatly combed hair, and wore a dark brown corduroy jacket over a white shirt, the collar slightly wrinkled like he’d worn it more than once this week. Dark blue jeans, straight cut. Heavy doc martens thudded softly as he stepped inside. He gave Uzi a polite, wordless nod—barely a flick of acknowledgement—before settling a few feet away on the opposite side.

 

The door closed again with a muted shhhk, and the elevator resumed its slow crawl downward. 

 

Uzi stayed absolutely still, staring forward. She was scared that if she moved, she might accidentally initiate a conversation.

 

Her arms stayed tight against her sides. The silence was unbearable.

 

She loathed this. Being stuck in a small box with a stranger made every nerve in her body go rigid. Her mind was already spiraling—what if he tried talking to her? What was she supposed to say? What if she coughed weird or something? Should she tie her shoe now? Would that make it worse? What if he judged her for her bedhead? What if he could smell her breath from brushing her teeth too fast? 

 

The elevator hummed along quietly.

 

She wished it would just fall. Or better yet, teleport her directly to the lobby so she could pretend none of this had happened.

 

The second she felt the floor jolt for the next stop, she was going to bolt

 

And then—just when Uzi thought things couldn’t get worse—he spoke

 

“So,” the drone said casually, his tone polite but far too chipper for Uzi’s liking, “how’s the trip going so far?”

 

Her entire frame tensed.

 

Seriously? Small talk? 

 

She turned her head slightly toward him, blinking like she’d just misheard. “What?”

 

There was a beat of awkward silence as the man glanced over, a little more engaged now.

 

“You’re with the school group, right? The New Ore City trip?”

 

Uzi’s expression tightened. She gave a slow nod, her lips pressed in a thin, straight line. “…Yeah.”

 

Internally, she was screaming

 

This—this right here—was exactly why she hated elevators. No escape, no excuse, and now she was expected to socialize with a complete stranger. Her voice came out a little flat, a little awkward as she added, “It’s… fine so far. I guess.” 

 

In truth, she barely remembered anything about what had even been planned today. Her mind had been so scrambled by the chaos of getting ready, her hair, her boots, the elevator, and now this guy —it was all blurring together. 

 

But then… a small flicker of suspicion cut through the haze.

 

How did he know about the trip? 

 

Sure, maybe the name tags most students wore made it obvious, but something about how easily he referenced it made her pause. Her brows furrowed slightly as she took a small, almost imperceptible breath through her nose.

 

She spoke again, quieter this time. “…How do you know about the trip?”

 

The man finally turned his head toward her, giving her a more full glance, his expression mildly sheepish. “Oh. Right. Yeah, that probably sounded a little creepy, huh?” He gave a nervous chuckle, one hand rubbing the back of his neck.

 

You think? Uzi thought, deadpan. She didn’t say it aloud, but her stare might’ve communicated enough. 

 

“I’m not some weirdo, promise,” he went on, clearly catching the look she was giving him. “My fiancée’s one of the chaperones. She, uh… wanted me to tag along. She’s loving it here so far—though dealing with a bunch of teenagers isn’t exactly a vacation.”

 

He ended with a light laugh, like he expected her to join in.

 

Uzi did not. 

 

She blinked at him once, her expression flat. The corners of her mouth twitched—not toward a smile, but more like she was fighting the urge to cringe harder.

 

So his fiancée was a chaperone? That explained the familiarity, sure… but somehow it didn’t make things less awkward. If anything, it made her feel weirder. Like now she was obligated to not be rude, even though she was internally digging herself into a hole and hiding there. 

 

It was impossible to try to mask her disinterest at that point. Her expression barely moved, eyes fixed on the elevator doors ahead as if she could force them open with sheer force of will.

 

Still, trying her best to at least seem civil, she muttered flatly, “Congrats.” It came out stiff and half-hearted. She couldn’t have sounded less enthusiastic if she tried. 

 

The man, oblivious to her tone, smiled anyway—an easy, genuine grin. “Thanks! We’re actually getting married the week after the trip ends. Can’t wait.”

 

Great, Uzi thought. Good for you. Can I go now? 

 

She nodded once, tight-lipped, and offered a smile that wasn’t real in the slightest. It felt like stretching plastic across her face. She didn’t say anything else. She didn’t want to say anything else. She was done with this ‘conversation’. 

 

Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed the guy shifting again—his posture angling like he was about to speak more. 

 

Her stomach dropped.

 

Oh, no. No, no, please—stop talking. 

 

Uzi’s soul practically tried to evacuate her body. She wanted nothing more than to melt into the floor or phase through the elevator wall. Why did some strangers treat silence like a problem they needed to fix?

 

But then—salvation.

 

The elevator dinged.

 

The doors slid open.

 

She immediately felt like she could breathe again.

 

The man stepped out first, turning halfway over his shoulder. “Alright, well—have a good one,” he said cheerfully, giving her a little wave as he walked off, already whistling some tune like he was the main character in a movie montage.

 

Uzi didn’t respond. Not even a nod.

 

Instead, she deliberately slowed her steps, waiting a few seconds before exiting the elevator herself just to ensure there was distance between them. The last thing she wanted was to end up walking beside him. That would’ve been unbearable. Death by awkwardness, right there in the hotel lobby.

 

She exhaled through her nose, muttering under her breath. “What a great start to the day…” 

 

The moment that stranger rounded a corner and vanished from view, Uzi’s pace shifted from cautious to brisk. She nearly bolted toward the hotel lobby, boots tapping against the polished floor. She could hear a few voices echoing from up ahead—scattered chatter, the occasional laugh—but it was noticeably quieter than the usual pre-departure chaos. That wasn’t comforting. It meant she definitely had to have been late

 

Her nerves spiked. Her eyes locked on the corner just ahead, the last stretch before the lobby opened up beyond the tall column. She just had to turn that corner and—

 

Everything stopped.

 

Her thoughts derailed with the sudden jolt of motion. One second, she was walking. The next, her foot snagged hard against something, and the floor rushed up toward her like it had been yanked into her path.

 

She tripped—hard. 

 

The lurch was violent. Her stomach flipped, and her arms barely had time to move before she went down. She threw her hands out just in time to catch herself, palms slamming against the cold tile—and something sharp?—with a loud, skin-prickling smack . Pain sparked through them instantly. 

 

She blinked, stunned.

 

For a brief, surreal moment, she just sat there on the floor, knees and hands planted, trying to piece together what just happened.

 

After a painful moment, she forced herself to roll over on her back, and sit up on her elbows slightly. She craned slightly her neck to drop her gaze to her feet—and there it was.

 

That stupid shoelace. 

 

Trailing like a smug ribbon across the ground, undone from the very boot she’d meant to tie earlier. Of course. Of course this would happen. 

 

Her face heated—not from pain, but from sheer mortification.

 

Please tell me no one saw that, she thought with quiet panic, jaw tightening. 

 

She was still sprawled in the middle of the hallway. A part of her wanted to just stay there. Give up. Sink into the floor. But the moment was already ticking away, and she knew she had to move.

 

She needed to get up, fix her laces, and find out just how badly this day had already gone off the rails.

 

But there was one problem.

 

Her hands burned. And it wasn’t just the pain of some little scrape. The sharp, stinging throb was spreading in waves from her palms and fingers, and she didn’t even fully register it at first—too busy being humiliated on the floor. But then she sat up slightly, breath shallow, and glanced down at her palms. 

 

Her chest tightened.

 

Oil. 

 

Thin, dark streaks of it were smeared across her right hand—small scrapes, nothing too dramatic. But her left hand…

 

There was a gash. 

 

A clean, shallow slice running diagonally just beneath her knuckles in the inside of her palm, already weeping a slow, glistening line of oil that trickled toward her wrist. The sight made her stomach twist. Seriously?! How had tile done that much damage? 

 

Her eyes darted to the floor, brows furrowed in confusion—until she spotted it. Tucked along the edge where the carpet met the smooth tile was a thin metal strip, the kind of thing that was probably meant to make the seam between the two floor types more aesthetically appealing. Only, it wasn’t . The end of it, right near the wall, had a small section where it jutted out—a sharp, barely-noticeable corner that had clearly caught her hand during the fall. 

 

Uzi let out a slow, frustrated sigh through her teeth, lifting her hand slightly and watching oil drip from her fingers in thin trails. She wiped some off on her hoodie, already not caring. Her mood had officially curdled.

 

Just her luck . She was late, flustered, and now physically injured before she’d even made it to the lobby. 

 

She muttered to herself bitterly, “Yeah. Awesome. This day just keeps getting better.” 

 

The sarcasm did nothing to help.

 

And just as she wondered how this morning could possibly get any worse, as if the universe had been lying in wait for her to tempt fate—she heard it. A voice just behind her.

 

“Uzi?”

 

Her entire body froze. Her stomach dropped.

 

She shut her eyes tight, just for a second. Willed herself invisible. Wished she could rewind the last five minutes and not be sitting on the floor, hands covered in oil and failure.


Because someone had just said her name.

 

And that meant… someone who knew her had just seen all of this. 

Notes:

Okay so I had no idea how I should describe the metal thing I was talking abt, so I tried my best 🥲 it’s like, that metal trimming thing in a doorway between 2 types of floors? I might even like, link a picture of what I’m talking abt there so it makes more sense. It’s also made out of the same material as like,,, bleachers, so I got the idea that she cut herself from it on accident cuz one time, I scraped my leg on the edge of a bleacher, like it wasn’t even super sharp, and it fucking sliced a part of my knee open bro 😭😭

But yeah. Also, sorry abt the cliff hanger, but I had to 😫 I feel like it’s pretty predictable who it is, but I WILL say it’s not N. Won’t say anything other than that though

Ik I posted this chapter pretty fast too cuz I only posted the last one what, 2 days ago?? But it’s cuz I’m feeling so inspired rn. I think it’s cuz I haven’t written in like 2 weeks so I’ve js been really wanting to. I’m like the opposite of burnt out 😩

BUT I’m gonna post the next chapter like, Monday or Tuesday. Probably Monday but don’t wanna guarantee it, so the latest will be Tuesday.

Ik that’s a long wait or wtv, but it’s cuz I really wanna update my other story more- I js posted another chapter yesterday, which I already had done but just needed to edit it, but I have a shit ton of it written out that I really wanna finish and post cuz it’s SO GOOD ugh I can’t wait to write more. Like, if u don’t know what I’m talking abt somehow, the other story I have is a MD zombie apocalypse AU set in a universe which rules are pretty much the same as this fic’s (like, they’re a normal society and have more human like characteristics and stuff.) I FINALLY decided that there’s gonna be no disassembly drones in that fic- I’ve been debating on that for a while, but again finally figured it out. I think I updated the fic and explained why in the a/n of the first chapter, if anyone wants to look at that.

But yeah overall, to sum everything up, I’m gonna try and post 1-3 chapters of my other story over the next few days, and then gonna update this one Monday or Tuesday, which will be great.

I have a lot in store for what’s gonna happen in the next few chapters. I wanna talk abt it so bad but no way am I spoiling it 😩 a LOT of shit is gonna go down though. And there’s this one scene I’m so excited to write cuz the aesthetics of it and stuff are so cool, like I always imagine it like a movie scene. Like… okay… fine. I’ll say ONE thing. It happens in a subway. OKAY IVE SAID TOO MUCH pretend I didn’t say that. (I promise it’s nothing bad 🥲 like Uzi isn’t gonna get hit by a fucking train or som 😭 but like bro I promise it’s gonna be SO COOL I js need to figure out how to describe it really well) OKAY I need to shut up before I say more 🙂‍↕️

That’s abt everything, I think. Hope yall liked this chapter!

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

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EDIT (8/12/25): Hey guys- I got a little busy today, so I don’t have time to edit the chapter and post it 🥲 BUT posting it tomorrow for sure cuz I have pretty much all of it done, it’s js not edited at all 💔

Chapter 91: Embarrassing

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi pushed herself upright, her shoulders tense, every movement feeling like it took extra effort. The sting in her palms was bad enough, but the dread in her stomach was worse—because now she had to face whoever had caught her in this mess.

 

Slowly, almost reluctantly, she turned her head.

 

And when her eyes landed on Thad, her expression shifted from guarded horror to a flat, unimpressed deadpan.

 

Of course it was him.

 

He was standing a few paces away, one brow arched and his mouth twitching, as if he was physically wrestling with the urge to laugh. His eyes sparkled with barely-contained amusement.

 

“You, uh… doing alright there?” he asked, his voice light, almost teasing, though it was clear he was trying not to outright chuckle.

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes at him, her tone dripping with annoyance. “Do I look alright to you?”

 

That wiped away exactly none of his amusement, though it did make him take a few steps closer. He came to a stop right in front of her and extended a hand, his smirk softening just slightly. “C’mon, here.”

 

She hesitated—accepting help from Thad wasn’t exactly on her list of things she enjoyed, mostly out of spite—but she finally reached up and took his hand.

 

And immediately regretted it.

 

Pain shot through her right palm like a spark from live wire, and she hissed through her teeth, briskly jerking her hand back.

 

Thad blinked in surprise, then glanced down at his own palm. His smirk faded when he saw it—dark streaks of oil smeared across his fingers. His gaze flicked back to her hand, and his voice was noticeably more serious when he said, “Uh… I think you’re bleeding.”

 

Uzi met that with a sharp glare, her lips pressing into a thin line. She knew he wasn’t mocking her—his tone wasn’t the kind of smug she expected—but the fact he was pointing it out at all made her bristle. She didn’t want him noticing, didn’t want him acknowledging how pathetic this probably looked.

 

She flexed her hand once, wincing again. Every part of her just wanted this interaction to be over.

 

Uzi gave a sharp, annoyed exhale through her nose, muttering a clipped, “Yeah, I know,” before letting a few more words slip through her teeth, under her breath, ”I’m so done with this shit…

 

She planted her right hand on the ground to push herself up—scrapes or not, it was still the better option compared to the deep gash in her left. The rough sting made her jaw tighten, but she ignored it, forcing herself upright until she was standing again.

 

A small sigh escaped her—equal parts frustration and resignation—before she looked at him with narrowed eyes. “So… what are you even doing here?”

 

Thad leaned casually against the wall, like this was just a casual hallway conversation and not a crime scene of her dignity. “Forgot my phone in my room,” he said easily, gesturing vaguely down the hall towards the elevators. “Figured I’d run back and grab it. But…” His grin returned, eyes crinkling in amusement. “…when I turned the corner, I got a front-row seat to watching you trip over your own shoelace and faceplant.”

 

The smirk widened as he added, “Looked like something straight out of one of those epic fail compilations on YouTube.”

 

Uzi stared at him, utterly deadpan. “Yeah, well… I wish I could find this half as funny as you apparently do. Guess it’s only hilarious when it’s someone else’s face in the floor,” she rolled her eyes,”You should try being in my shoes for a day…” she muttered the last part just loud enough for him to hear.

 

Thad just gave a little shrug, the picture of unbothered. “True. But I wouldn’t be in your shoes anyway.” His grin sharpened slightly. “I don’t forget to tie mine.”

 

Uzi blinked—slow, deliberate, and far too long. Her hands curled into loose fists at her sides, even if they stun a little. Every muscle in her telling her to just shove him flat on the floor and wipe that smug look off his face. She held back, but it was a near thing.

 

Before Uzi could fire back with something appropriately biting, Thad’s voice cut in again—this time lacking the same teasing lilt. His tone had shifted, not completely serious, but enough to make her pause.

 

“You should probably go wash that off,” he said, lifting a finger to point at her left hand.

 

Uzi glanced down, following his gaze to her hand. The gash she’d been stubbornly ignoring was still bleeding a thin, steady stream of oil that gathered at her fingertip before dripping to the floor. It wasn’t gushing, but the warm, sticky sensation against her plating was making her skin crawl in a way she refused to show on her face.

 

Thad gestured loosely at it. “Might make you feel better. And… y’know, you probably don’t want that getting infected.”

 

She kept her expression perfectly flat, though her eyes narrowed just slightly. “Wow. Shocked to see you being so… considerate. For me .

 

He gave a shrug like it was no big deal, though a faint smirk lingered. “What can I say? Just looking out for my best buddy.”

 

Uzi rolled her eyes, the motion slow and deliberate, before deciding she wasn’t in the mood to entertain what she assumed was mock sincerity any longer. Crossing her arms—carefully, so her injured hand didn’t touch anything—she changed the subject.

 

“How late am I?” she asked, her voice holding that heavy, resigned edge of someone who already knew the answer was bad. At this point, she’d made peace with the fact she was probably record-breaking levels of late.

 

Thad blinked at her, head tilting slightly. “Late? If anything, you’re early for once.”

 

Uzi stared back at him, unimpressed, her voice flat as a sheet of metal. “Cut it out. You’re not being funny, Thad.”

 

He shook his head, smirking faintly. “No, seriously. I was expecting you to roll in at the last second… or just not show up at all. You’re not usually ten minutes early.”

 

Her brain stalled for a second. What? That didn’t add up. V had told her she only had five minutes—she’d been rushing the entire way here under that assumption. And yet… here Thad was, saying she was early.

 

But even if he was right, something still felt off. Ten minutes before things were supposed to start, the lobby should’ve been buzzing already. Instead, she’d heard barely any voices, and she hadn’t seen a single drone in the halls on her way down. And what was with that ‘not at all’ comment? Wasn’t attendance mandatory for these pointless morning announcements?

 

She narrowed her eyes and asked, “Then where is everyone?”

 

Thad raised a brow, like she’d just asked why the sky was blue. “You seriously forgot? It’s the free day. Most drones are sleeping in.”

 

Her frown deepened.

 

“I was gonna sleep in too,” he went on with a lazy shrug, “but N woke me up—said we were meeting in the lobby with our group. Rebecca even texted something about it in the group chat.”

 

Uzi’s mouth flattened into a razor-thin line.

 

He was being serious?!

 

A hot wave of irritation flared through her. Fantastic. Just fantastic. Why had V told her she only had five minutes?! Was this some elaborate plan to humiliate her before she’d even had breakfast?

 

She fought the urge to groan and instead asked, “What time is it?” Her hands still smarted from the fall, so pulling out her phone wasn’t an appealing option.

 

Thad’s lips curled into a smirk. “Time for you to get a watch.”

 

She blinked at him, utterly done with this conversation, then promptly drove the toe of her shoe into his shin.

 

Ow—! Ow, ow, ow!” Thad staggered back, hopping on one foot while gripping his leg, his face twisting in pain. He shot her an incredulous glare. “What the hell, Uzi?!”

 

She gave a halfhearted shrug, tone dry as sand. “You deserved it.”

 

He straightened slowly, still rubbing his shin, his frown pinched with lingering pain. “Alright, alright—” he muttered, wincing. “You know you did that to yourself, though.”

 

Uzi didn’t even dignify that with an answer.

 

With a small sigh, Thad reached into his pocket, pulled out his phone, and glanced at the screen. “It’s 9:53,” he said. “Announcements start at ten.”

 

Internally, Uzi was seething. Not only had she been shoved into a pointless rush that ended with her tripping and slicing her hand open, but she didn’t even need to be here.

 

She could’ve been upstairs, curled under her blanket, blissfully ignoring the world.

 

The next time she saw V, she was going to give her an earful—preferably loud enough to rattle windows.

 

With a tight exhale, she asked, “So… where’s everyone meeting?” Her tone was flat, but her narrowed eyes betrayed her irritation.

 

Thad, still favoring the leg she’d kicked, gestured casually toward the lobby. “Same spot as yesterday, near the reception desk.”

 

She gave a curt nod. “Alright. I’ll catch up in a minute—need to wash this off first.” She held her hands slightly apart, the dark oil still streaking her fingers, making her uncomfortable just looking at it.

 

“Sounds good,” Thad said with a faint grin, lifting a hand in a lazy wave before turning to head off.

 

Uzi let out another long sigh, her shoulders slumping. If her hands weren’t coated in oil, she might’ve dragged one down her face in pure exasperation.

 

Instead, she turned toward the hanging bathroom signs, already bracing herself for the day ahead. If this was how it had started, she didn’t have high hopes for the rest of it.

 

-

 

Uzi emerged from the bathroom with her hands still damp, the faint smell of cheap soap clinging to them. Normally, she would’ve just smeared the water across her shirt and been done with it, but the oily residue still seeping from the gash on her left hand made that a bad idea.

 

Instead, she clutched the small paper towel she’d rolled into a crude little ball in her right hand, pressing it firmly against the wound on her left. You’re supposed to apply pressure to a wound to make it stop bleeding, right…? 

 

She kept the pressure steady as she walked, her eyes flicking over the now-quieter lobby. The crowd had thinned compared to the last two days—no swarm of shouting classmates, just a scattered handful of voices and the soft hum of conversation. For a moment, it was almost peaceful.

 

That peace evaporated when she caught a few curious stares from other students, their gazes lingering just long enough for her to feel heat creep into her cheeks. Great. As if she wasn’t already irritated and sore, now she got to be the morning’s sideshow attraction.

 

Her jaw tightened, and she adjusted her grip—folding her fingers over the balled-up paper towel instead so it looked less obvious, less pathetic. Then, without missing a step, she shoved both hands into her hoodie pockets. The fabric pressed awkwardly against the wound, but she figured a little discomfort was better than walking around with her injury on display.

 

Out of sight, out of mind—at least for them. For her, the dull, throbbing reminder was impossible to ignore.

 

Uzi spotted Darren first, lounging against the wall like he had nowhere better to be. He lifted a hand in a slow, casual wave, his expression somewhere between bored and mildly amused.

 

Normally, she would’ve returned it, but the thought of exposing her bandaged hand to the world again made her stomach twist.

 

Instead, she gave him a short nod—barely more than a dip of her chin—and kept walking.

 

The group was loosely gathered in their usual spot, the easy murmur of conversation weaving between them. Emily noticed her arrival first, her expression brightening as she straightened a little.

 

“Morning, Uzi! How’d you sleep?” she asked, voice light and curious.

 

The question blindsided her. One second she was in the present, the next she was back in that dim alcove, the quiet hum of the night around her, the couch cushions dipping under both her and N’s weight, staring into his eyes—

 

Nope. Absolutely not. Not here. Not now. 

 

Her mouth went dry, and when she forced out a response, the words tripped over themselves just slightly—not enough for most to notice, but enough for her to feel it like a snag in her wiring.

 

“Fine. Slept fine,” she managed, blinking hard and glancing away, willing her face not to betray her. Her cheeks felt dangerously warm, and she was certain Emily would read way too much into it if she lingered.

 

She blinked quickly, turning her gaze somewhere— anywhere —else before Emily could study her face too closely. If she could just keep her expression neutral, maybe she could keep her face from burning.

 

Her eyes drifted over the group—Rebecca, conversing with Emily, her arms folded; Darren, still looking like he’d rather be anywhere else; Emily, ever chipper… and then her gaze landed on him.

 

N.

 

He was already watching her, as if he’d been waiting for her to look his way. The moment their eyes met, his mouth tilted into a sheepish smile, and he gave a small, almost hesitant wave. Something about the way he did it—like he wasn’t sure if she’d return the gesture—made her chest feel uncomfortably tight.

 

“Good morning,” he said, his voice carrying that unpolished warmth that made her want to look away and keep looking all at once.

 

And just like that, she was looking away, shoving her attention somewhere else before anyone could read too much into the way her pulse had just kicked up a notch.

 

Rebecca said something to Emily—Uzi caught the sound but not the meaning. The words slid past her without sticking; she was too preoccupied with the way N’s eyes lingered on her, as if the rest of the group had faded into background noise.

 

She made a valiant effort to smother the smile tugging at her mouth, tightening her jaw and glancing away as if that would help.

 

It didn’t.

 

The curve of it still broke through, stubborn and uncontainable. “…Morning,” she said at last, her voice softer than intended, unable to look at him for more than a second without feeling her chest fizz in that irritating, involuntary way.

 

A quiet sigh escaped her—silent, but heavy with resignation. This wasn’t the kind of thing she could train herself out of.

 

Don’t get her wrong, she liked this. She liked the way he made her feel—warm and strangely steady—but it was maddening that she had no control over it, especially when she was in public. 

 

She only snapped back into focus when she realized his smile had disappeared. N was frowning at her now, eyes narrowing in quiet concern. Before she could decipher it, he stepped a fraction closer, the movement subtle enough that the others might not have noticed.

 

“You okay?” he asked, voice low but laced with enough worry to catch her off guard.

 

Her brow furrowed, confusion knitting her thoughts. Was something wrong? Had she been standing weird? Was there something on her face?

 

“What?” The word came out before she could stop it, automatic and uncertain.

 

N leaned in slightly—not enough to breach her space, but enough that she could feel his attention sharpen. “You’re bleeding,” he said, his tone quiet but deliberate, as if he didn’t want to make a scene.

 

Unconsciously, Uzi glanced down at her hands. They were still in her pockets—she hadn’t taken them out. And her jacket was dark, so even if somehow she had gotten oil onto it, it wouldn’t be visible. So how did he…? 

 

Uzi’s gaze flicked back up at him, brow arched, suspicion flashing across her face. “…How exactly do you know that?” she asked, her voice low but edged with curiosity.

 

N didn’t miss a beat. “I can smell it,” he said simply, as if that explained everything.

 

She blinked at him, uncertain how to respond. Then, with an easy shift of movement, he leaned back again, putting a little space between them.

 

It took her a second to process why—until the thought hit her. Right… Disassembly drones could probably detect oil the way normal drones could detect a burnt circuit—just floating in the air, subtle but unmistakable to them. She couldn’t smell a thing herself unless there was an obvious mess , and she wasn’t exactly pouring oil right now.

 

Sure, the cut had been bad enough earlier to warrant pressing a paper towel against it, but most of the bleeding had slowed to a stubborn trickle by now. A little concerning, maybe—but far from a horror show. 

 

She was about to ask him something—probably about whether smelling oil was normal for him—when she froze.

 

Her gaze drifted to the thin, unmistakable line of drool trailing down from the corner of his mouth, catching faint light before it reached his chin.

 

Her eyes widened slightly, her thoughts stumbling over themselves.

 

Slowly, she withdrew her free hand from her pocket—the one without the injury—and lifted a finger to point at him. “You’re… drooling,” she said quietly, her tone caught somewhere between unsettled and faintly embarrassed for him.

 

N hesitated, his expression flickering with uncertainty—until something clicked. His eyes widened, a flash of realization crossing his face, and in one quick motion he swiped the back of his sleeve across his mouth. The gesture was clumsy, almost panicked, as if he could erase the moment if he moved fast enough.

 

When he glanced away from her, the shift in his posture was impossible to miss—shoulders slightly hunched, gaze angled toward the ground, embarrassment written all over him. “…Sorry,” he mumbled, voice low and quick. “I… can’t really help it.”

 

Uzi let out a quiet sigh, the sound small but deliberate. “It’s fine,” she said, and her tone was as casual as she could make it. “I get it.”

 

That wasn’t entirely true—and she knew it. She could understand on some level, given what he’d told her about himself… but she couldn’t feel what that was like, not really. She could only imagine, and even then her mind came up short. A small part of her wondered what was actually going through his head in that moment—whether it was just embarrassment, or something heavier.

 

She slid her uninjured hand back into her pocket, deciding to steer them somewhere else entirely. “So… today’s the free day, right? Like—no doubt about it?”

 

N’s posture loosened instantly, relief slipping into his expression like a quiet breath. He shot her a glance and nodded. “Yeah.”

 

She noticed he didn’t fully meet her eyes, gaze still hovering somewhere to the side, but she didn’t take it personally. Whatever that moment had been, he clearly didn’t want to dwell on it.

 

After a beat, he asked, “You still want to hang out today, right?” His tone carried a hint of hope beneath the lingering awkwardness, like he was trying to gauge her mood without pushing too hard.

 

Uzi’s mind flickered back to that first morning of the trip—on the bus, when she’d asked him if he wanted to spend the free day with her. She hadn’t even known if the free day way anymore than just a rumor, but she somehow managed to get the courage to ask him. Of course, N agreed without hesitation. He even asked her again later the same day to clarify if she still wanted to, after finding out that the free day was for sure on the schedule. She had said yes then, and there was no reason to say otherwise now.

 

She gave a small nod, the corner of her mouth twitching upward. “Yeah. That’d be great.”

 

The reaction she got was instant. N’s face lit up like someone had just thrown open a set of shutters to let the sun pour in. A broad smile broke across his features, earnest and unrestrained, and for a split second Uzi almost forgot to look away.

 

“I can’t wait,” he said, his voice carrying that bright, boyish enthusiasm that always seemed to sneak past her defenses.

 

She tilted her head slightly, curiosity edging her tone. “Do you know what you wanna do when—”

 

Her words were cut off by a sharp, projecting voice rising over the low hum of the crowd. Uzi froze mid-sentence, then deadpanned, her shoulders slumping. Perfect. I just love getting interrupted mid-sentence. She muttered under her breath to N, “I’ll just tell you later…

 

He nodded once, still smiling slightly.

 

The field trip guide, standing near the front, raised a hand for attention. “Alright, everyone—today is your free day, as most of you already know.” His tone was brisk but not unfriendly.

 

After letting the crowd settle, he went on. “Remember—stay with a group. Don’t wander off alone, especially if nobody knows where you’re going. And stay within the city limits. We do not want any students getting lost.” His gaze swept over the crowd with the kind of weight that suggested he was imagining the chaos of chasing down strays.

 

He continued, “Everyone must be back at the hotel by six o’clock sharp. We’ll be hosting a rooftop dinner—sponsored, generously, by one of your classmates’ parents. They’ve covered the full cost, so consider this our way of saying thank you.”

 

While the guide kept talking, Uzi’s mind was drifting somewhere between mildly interested and mentally checked out. The rooftop dinner sounded… fine, she guessed. Not exciting, but not terrible either. As long as she stayed with the drones she actually liked, she’d probably manage to have a decent time.

 

Her thoughts were already beginning to wander when a light tap landed on her shoulder. She turned her head left and found Thad standing there, a smirk tugging at his face.

 

“Hey, nerd,” he greeted in a low voice.

 

Uzi’s expression flattened instantly. “Speak for yourself,” she muttered, her tone clipped, but not genuinely upset.

 

Thad rolled his eyes like she’d just told the most predictable joke in the world. Leaning in slightly, he whispered, “So… what’d I miss?”

 

Uzi didn’t even bother to lower her voice much. “Literally nothing. He’s just over-explaining the obvious.” She flicked her hand vaguely toward the guide. “It’s a free day, and then there’s some rooftop dinner at six. That’s it.”

 

Thad frowned slightly. “Didn’t he already say that on the first day?”

 

She gave a half-shrug, disinterested. “I dunno. Wasn’t listening.”

 

By the time the words left her mouth, the guide had apparently wrapped things up—the quiet murmur of the crowd swelled into full-blown chatter, groups already starting to break apart and drift in their chosen directions.

 

Uzi shifted her weight, about to turn toward N to pick up their conversation, when Thad’s voice cut in again.

 

“Hey, Uzi—” he started.

 

Uzi turned her head fully toward him, brows lifting just slightly. “What?”

 

Thad tilted his chin toward her, his voice casual but edged with curiosity. “You doing anything for the free day?”

 

She gave a short nod. “Yeah. Why?” Her tone carried a hint of suspicion, like she was bracing for some dumb comment.

 

“Oh,” he said, rocking back a little on his heels as he sidestepped her question. “So… what are you doing then?”

 

Uzi hesitated, her mind coming up unexpectedly blank. Right… what are we doing? She and N hadn’t planned anything specific, only that they’d be together the whole day. Still, that was enough of an answer for her.

 

Looking back at Thad, she said, “I’m hanging out with N.”

 

The moment the name left her mouth, she caught the shift in his expression—subtle, but there. His mouth pressed into a thin, flat line, his eyes narrowing just enough to read as unimpressed.

 

Uzi blinked at him, caught off guard. What’s with the face?

 

“What?” she asked, her tone dipping into suspicion again.

 

Thad’s eyes flickered for a second before his expression smoothed out into something more neutral. He gave a quiet, almost imperceptible sigh—so small most drones wouldn’t have noticed it at all—and glanced off to the side.

 

“It’s nothing,” he said finally, brushing it off. “Never mind.”

 

Her eyes lingered on him for a moment longer, but the slight edge in his tone left a faint prickle of curiosity under her skin.

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed slightly, her processors turning over the brief, strange exchange. Okay, what was that supposed to mean? And why does he keep making that stupid face? It was just one more thing added to the pile of odd behavior he’d been showing lately, and her patience for guessing games was running thin.

 

Shaking her head, she cut in firmly. “No. Don’t give me that—it’s not nothing. I can tell something’s up. I’m not an idiot.”

 

Thad glanced back at her but avoided her gaze, fiddling with the brim of his backward cap like it was suddenly uncomfortable. “Seriously, Uzi. It’s not important.”

 

She arched a brow, fixing him with a look that said i’m not buying it for a second. Her silence pressed down on the space between them, the faint hum of other drones moving around in the background.

 

He broke first. With a small exhale, he muttered, “Fine. I was gonna ask if you wanted to hang out for the free day. But…” his voice shifted, carrying an edge she wasn’t used to from him, “…you’re clearly preoccupied.

 

Her systems stumbled over that response. Thad didn’t usually go serious like this, not with her. And lately, it wasn’t just today—he’d been dropping moments like this more and more often. She needed to corner him about it eventually, figure out what the hell was going on.

 

Is he mad at me? The thought didn’t feel right. He still cracked jokes, still messed around with her most of the time. But there was something under the surface now—something that didn’t line up with the Thad she knew.

 

Uzi decided not to let the mood sink too far into whatever strange territory Thad was trying to drag it. This wasn’t the place, and it definitely wasn’t the time—she could grill him later when they weren’t standing in the middle of a crowd and when N wasn’t basically within arm’s reach. Out of the corner of her vision, she could see N chatting with Emily, his posture relaxed, but there was a subtle shift in his stance—like he was ready to head out the moment she was done here.

 

She tilted her head at Thad and offered, “Well… I won’t be ‘preoccupied’ later. Dinner’s a free-for-all—we can hang out then.” She gave his shoulder a shove, lighter than her usual mock-aggressive style. “No big deal. Besides, this way there’s zero chance for me to shove you in front of a train if you make me mad.”

 

That earned a quick smirk from him, and a small laugh. “As if I’d ever give you the chance. And if I’m going down, I’m taking you with me.”

 

She rolled her eyes, already crafting something sarcastic to fire back, but before she could get a word out, a gentle tap landed on her other shoulder. She pivoted slightly, and there was N—expression open, mid-step toward her. He started to say something, but his gaze flicked to Thad, and a faint hitch passed through his expression.

 

“Oh—uh, sorry,” N said, the words polite but hesitant. “Am I interrupting?”

 

A flicker of mild surprise went through Uzi at his tone—it wasn’t exactly jealousy, but it carried a careful, checking quality she hadn’t heard from him much before.

 

Uzi opened her mouth to answer N, but Thad cut in first.

 

“No, you’re not,” he told N, voice short and clipped. “I was just about to head out anyway.”

 

She blinked at him. Just seconds ago, he’d been smirking and trading banter, but now his whole demeanor had shifted—shoulders tight, expression guarded. Before she could even get a word in, he was already stepping away.

 

“Bye, Uzi,” he tossed an wave over his shoulder, not waiting for her response. She watched him head straight toward Darren, leaning in to say something low that she couldn’t catch.

 

Her brow creased. Okay, seriously—what is up with him?

 

She turned back to N, lifting her shoulders in a small shrug. “Guess we should get going.”

 

N’s brow furrowed faintly, like he’d picked up on some of that tension himself, but when her words landed, his expression eased again. He gave a short nod. “Yeah—probably.”

 

There was a brief pause, his gaze flicking toward the crowd starting to disperse. Then he looked back to her, a small, curious smile playing at his lips. “So… where do you want to go first?”

Notes:

I would’ve made this chapter longer, but I *really* needed to end it so I could post

Sorry for posting a day late- was super busy the past 2 days 🥲 should get better soon

Next chapter should be posted Monday. May even do Sunday if I’m feeling it

I really enjoyed writing this chapter- I didn’t really like the last part cuz it was really difficult for me to come up with the dialogue between Uzi and Thad, but I figured it out (I think 😭) After reading over it again though I like it a lot more

A shit ton of stuff is gonna happen in the next chapters, so excited to write it!!! And then I’ve started thinking abt what’s gonna happen on the fourth day, and it’s like, *really* drama filled so I think y’all will like that 😌

I feel like at this point, it’s safe to confirm that Thad is really fucking jealous- it was kinda a spoiler before, but like cmon, if you couldn’t tell then that’s a little concerning 😭

I really like writing his character cuz like, in the show he doesn’t have much screen time cuz he’s only really a very minor character, so because of that I’ve been able to expand a lot on his personality, which has been super fun. I’m trying not to make him super out of character, I’m again js expanding on what was already there. Cuz like, in this AU I had to imagine him as if he was basically childhood best friends with Uzi, and when they reconnected it was like no time had passed. That’s kinda how their relationship is, which is a really fun dynamic to write in my opinion

Oh and icl, I’m a *tad* bit basing some of his personality off of Kel from Omori (if u know who that is 👀👀) cuz that js makes sense to me. And then mix his personality with Daisuke from Mouthwashing, and then on top of that use what’s already cannon for Thad’s character. Like the *kind of* comedic relief character who is super playful and teasing most of the time, but can be serious when he absolutely needs to be. But whenever he is serious it seems a bit out of character cuz it’s like, he never acts like that, so u know shits going down if a character like that starts acting really serious 🥲

But yeah again, trying my best not to make him extremely OOC. When I said I was basing his personality kinda off another character, it’s more so that I’m inspired *generally* by that characters personality, but not tryna make a carbon copy of them, if that makes sense.

Absolutely love characters like that, like they always end up being my favorite from whatever media they’re in. Can’t think of other examples but there definitely is more

Ok, back to this chapter and upcoming characters. If I’m being completely honest……… I really need to think of what the hell N and Uzi are gonna do. I have like, 2 ideas that I’m for sure doing, of like places they’re going, but like for one of them it’s not really definitive what’s gonna happen. Really gotta dig into my brain to try and figure this out 😭🙏 I promise though that the next chapter isn’t gonna be delayed cuz of that, like again ill figure it out as I go, but I thought I might as well say that cuz literally why not

I think that’s everything I have to say.

WAIT OH OKAY HOLD UP gotta self promote real fast- I posted THREE chapters of my other MD fic within the past 4 days, so like if you’ve been waiting for updates or js haven’t checked it out already, I’d recommend you do. It has a slow start, but like starts picking up ALOT once you get to chapter 5 (I think it’s 5, if it’s not I’ll edit this.) might seem like a long time, but the first 4 chapters are pretty short. The most recent one I updated is pretty long and dialogue rich though, and I love how it turned out.

OKAY that’s actually everything I have to say. See y’all soon in the next chapter!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 92: Mlem

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi tilted her head, chewing on the question for a moment. “Maybe we could get breakfast?” she suggested, tone casual.

 

N nodded right away, a soft smile spreading across his face. “Breakfast sounds good. Do you have anywhere in mind?”

 

Her answer was quick. “Not really.”

 

N slipped a hand into his pocket and pulled out his phone, flicking his thumb across the screen as he scrolled. His eyes darted over the display, brow lifting slightly in thought. “There’s… a lot of places around here,” he said after a beat, half to himself. 

 

Then, glancing back at her, he added warmly, “I’m good with whatever—you can decide.” And just like that, he turned the screen toward her. “Here. Pick one.”

 

Uzi froze. She was probably one of the most indecisive drones she knew—that might not mean a lot, considering that she didn’t know many drones—but still. She could barely pick between two identical pencils without overthinking it for ten minutes, how was she going to pick a place to eat at out of so many options?! 

 

She blinked at him, then instinctively raised her hands in refusal. “No, no, you can pick. It’s fine.”

 

But N shook his head, a polite, almost stubborn firmness in his voice. “I insist.”

 

Uzi just stared at him, expression flattening into a deadpan. Just fantastic. What the hell am I supposed to say now?

 

N must’ve caught the flat, unimpressed look she was giving him, because his own expression faltered. His mouth opened, then shut again, before he finally offered, almost tentative, “Well… we could just go back to that café we went to with the others the first day of the trip—if you want.”

 

Uzi felt her shoulders ease. Thank you.  She let out a subtle sigh of relief and nodded. “Yeah, that works. Let’s do that.” 

 

Satisfied, N slid his phone back into his pocket, his smile returning—gentle, content. “Alright. Let’s go then.”

 

Uzi gave a short nod, and together they made their way toward the hotel entrance.

 

When they reached the door, N pulled it open and stood aside, motioning for her to go first.

 

She slipped past him, muttering briskly, “Thanks,” but a small smile tugged at her lips regardless because of the kind gesture.

 

The sidewalk outside was already bustling, the kind of morning hum that made the city feel alive. Uzi and N walked side by side down the same route they’d taken before, toward the café.

 

For a while, the only sounds were the shuffle of footsteps and the conversations of drones passing them by. Then N broke the quiet, his voice careful, like he was easing into a question. “Hey, did you still want to go see the subway later?”

 

Uzi glanced at him, unsure if she heard him right, brows pulling together. “Hmm?”

 

N’s eyes flicked to her, then back ahead. “The New Ore City subways. You mentioned that you always wanted to see them. Just thought maybe…”

 

After a moment of processing what he said, Uzi remembered—she had mentioned it to him, when they first tossed around ideas for what to do on their free day. She hadn’t expected him to actually hold on to that detail. The realization left her with an odd warmth curling inside her chest, a fuzzy kind of feeling she didn’t exactly want to acknowledge, in fear of causing her face to heat up.

 

She brushed it aside quickly and answered him with more energy than she meant to, “Yeah—definitely. If I don’t go now, I’ll regret it. I mean, it’s the first time I’ve ever been here. I’d be kind of bummed if I missed out.”

 

N nodded, seeming pleased by her answer. Then, after a beat, he glanced sideways at her and asked, almost curiously, “So… why the subways? What’s so special about them to you?”

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard by the question. Huh? Why’s he asking that? She stalled for a second, then shrugged, scratching at the edge of her sleeve, “Honestly? It’s probably just because of all the videos about them online. Everyone makes them sound so interesting—like, all the weird types of drones you see down there, the chaos of it all. Feels like something you’ve gotta experience at least once in your life, you know?”

 

Her tone softened slightly, almost sheepish. “And… I’ve never actually been on a train before. I know, it’s not anything special, but… I still kinda want to. Just for the experience.”

 

N had just opened his mouth to say something back when Uzi suddenly lit up, as if struck by a memory. She cut across him, blurting, “Oh—also the rats. I’ve seen so many videos of the huge ones down there, and I’ve always wanted to see one in person.”

 

That stopped N dead in his tracks—both literally and in thought. His brows knit together, and his expression shifted from whatever he’d been about to say into complete bafflement. “…Rats?” he repeated, voice flat, as if making sure he’d heard correctly.

 

Uzi nodded with all the seriousness of someone announcing their life’s dream. Then her eyes flicked sideways toward him, the corner of her mouth tugging into a sly, mischievous smirk. “What? You got a problem with that?”

 

N’s eyes widened slightly, and his tone grew defensive in that flustered way he had. “What? No—no, not at all, I just…” His shoulders hunched a little, and he rubbed at the back of his neck with a sheepish smile. “I don’t really like rats. They kinda… gross me out.”

 

Uzi’s eyes flew open in mock outrage, and she stopped mid-step, clutching her chest as if he’d just insulted her entire worldview. “You don’t like rats ?!” she demanded, her voice dripping with exaggerated betrayal. “They’re like—literally the cutest thing ever!”

 

N laughed under his breath, but it was awkward, more self-conscious than anything. “I dunno… I’ve always been more of a dog guy. And, y’know, city rats are kinda… different from pet rats, right?”

 

Uzi waved her hand dismissively and started walking again, head held high like she was defending a noble cause. “That’s exactly what makes them great. They’re so huge and brown and fluffy-looking. I just wanna hug one.”

 

N muttered under his breath, “More like greasy…

 

Uzi’s head whipped around, her eyes narrowing as a sharp grin cut across her face. “ Excuse me? ” she drawled, mock-threat hanging in her tone.

 

N’s eyes widened at her sharp tone, and he instantly raised his hands a little, seemingly frantic. “S–sorry! I didn’t mean it like that, I wasn’t trying to—”

 

Uzi broke into a small laugh, cutting him off before he could spiral further. “Calm down, I’m messing with you,” she said, her smirk returning as she gave him a playful shove on the arm.

 

The movement was barely done before she regretted it.

 

The shove came from her left hand—the same one still sporting that ugly gash. A sudden sting made her wince, and she jerked the hand back quickly, her smile faltering.

 

N caught it instantly. His expression dropped from nervous to deeply concerned, eyes softening in a way that made it look like he was afraid he’d somehow hurt her. “What happened? Are you okay?” His voice had gone quiet, careful. 

 

Uzi scowled down at her hand, shaking it lightly as if the irritation could just be shaken off. “It’s nothing…” she muttered, her tone clipped with annoyance—not at him, but at herself. “Just this stupid cut.”

 

She lifted the hand slightly to glance at it. The scab had shifted when she shoved him, and now a thin line of oil was slowly seeping out again. She hissed under her breath, irritated at the sight. “Perfect. Guess I budged it open again…”

 

Her voice lowered into a mutter, almost like she was admitting something embarrassing. “Should’ve slapped a bandage on it or something, but honestly I was too lazy to head back to my room…”

 

She flexed her fingers, her expression a mix of annoyance and resignation, trying to act like it was nothing, though the sting made it clear it wasn’t.

 

When Uzi finally tore her gaze from the cut and looked back at N, her frown deepened in confusion. He wasn’t looking at her the way he usually did—his eyes weren’t on her face at all. Instead, they lingered on her injured hand, steady and unblinking, like something about it had locked his attention in place.

 

“…N?” she said slowly, testing his name as if it might bring him back.

 

And it did. He startled slightly, blinking hard as if pulled out of a daze, before he wrenched his gaze upward and away. “Sorry–…” he blurted fast, his tone almost too quick, like he was covering for something.

 

Uzi tilted her head, suspicion pricking at her. Before she could say anything else, though, he raised his own hand and scrubbed the back of it against his mouth. The small, nervous motion tugged at her memory, and her eyes widened a fraction.

 

He did the same thing just a few minutes ago, back at the hotel. This time, though, there was no strand of drool trailing down his chin, because he must’ve wiped it before it could get to that point.

 

Back in the hotel lobby, she didn’t want to ask him about it. Not only because of how mortified he looked, but also because it just wasn’t the place—not when she had been in earshot of not only her friends, but strangers. Now, though, even if they were out on the city sidewalk, their conversation was more private—she could actually comment on it now, if she wanted to.

 

The realization made her hesitate, heat rising faintly in her chest—not from embarrassment for herself, but secondhand for him. Still, she couldn’t stop the words that slipped out, quieter than she meant: “Um… is that… normal for you?”

 

N’s head snapped toward her, eyes flashing wide for the briefest second before darting away again, like he couldn’t hold her gaze. “I—uh—is what normal?” His voice was quick, forced casual, and it only made her more certain he knew exactly what she meant.

 

Uzi shifted uncomfortably, her hand twitching at her side. She swallowed, suddenly regretting opening her mouth, but forced herself to clarify anyway. “Y’know… when you… smell oil and you…” Her voice faltered mid-sentence, her face heating as the words grew too heavy, too awkward to actually finish. She let the sentence trail into silence, inwardly grimacing at how embarrassing it sounded now that it was out in the open.

 

N stayed quiet for a few beats after her awkward half-question, his gaze fixed ahead at the street as though he were weighing whether or not to answer at all.

 

Finally, his shoulders slumped a little, and his voice came low, reluctant but honest. “Kind of…”

 

That answer only made Uzi frown harder.

 

“Kind of?” she echoed, raising a brow. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

 

He shifted, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, “I mean… usually I can keep it under control. It’s not like this all the time. But if I’ve gone too many days without, uh… oil…” He trailed off briefly, wincing at the admission, before forcing the words out. “Then it gets kinda complicated.” 

 

Uzi blinked at him, her curiosity prickling sharper now. It didn’t sound like he was trying to make excuses; it sounded more like he hated even having to admit it. And yet—something in her remembered what he’d said before, about overheating if he went too long without it.

 

Connecting those dots, her voice softened despite herself. “How long can you even go without it?”

 

N hesitated, clearly uncertain whether the question was safe to answer. But when he glanced at her, her expression wasn’t judgmental—only searching. That seemed to give him enough courage to continue.

 

“About a week. Week and a half, if I push it. But the longer I wait, the worse it gets.” His tone had grown quieter, almost edged with shame, his eyes slipping down toward the pavement. “Last time I had any was… before the trip. And, um… I didn’t exactly think to pack some.” He finished his sentence with a self depreciating laugh.

 

Uzi’s brows furrowed, and she decided not to ask why he just had oil casually lying around. She doubted she’d get an answer she wanted anyway. Instead, her curiosity pressed at the part that unsettled her more: “What do you mean, ‘the worse it gets’?”

 

Her tone came carefully even, not accusing. She didn’t want him to shut down; she wanted to understand him better. Understand what he was better. 

 

It took N longer than it should have to get the words out, as if he were fighting against himself to admit them aloud. His eyes stayed forward as they walked slowly, unfocused, and when he finally spoke his voice was low, halting. “I get… cravings. They’re always there, in the background. But the longer I go without, the harder it gets to think straight. Especially if… oil’s right there in front of me.” 

 

Uzi froze, her stomach sinking. The realization hit her sharp and unpleasant.

 

Her hand—with the huge gash—was the reason he was struggling right now. 

 

If she’d just been careful, tied her shoe laces, not fallen like an idiot, maybe he wouldn’t have to be fighting himself just to walk beside her. She shoved her injured hand deep into her pocket, fingers closing around the crumpled paper towel again as if she could trap the apparent smell there.

 

Her voice came out quieter than she meant it to, edged with guilt. “…Sorry. I didn’t mean to make things harder for you. If I could just… make this stupid cut disappear, I would.”

 

At that, N glanced at her, and there was no irritation in his gaze—only something soft, almost protective. His lips tugged into a faint, reassuring smile. “Hey. Don’t blame yourself. It’s alright. Accidents happen.”

 

His words should’ve eased her guilt, but there was something in the way his gaze lingered on her, his expression holding a quiet weight. Then, he seemed caught on some unspoken thought, his steps slowing just slightly, like he was hesitant to move forward.

 

After a long moment, N finally spoke up again. His voice was thin and uncertain, like he was bracing for her reaction. “I… I could make the cut in your hand go away—if you’d let me.”

 

Uzi arched a brow, her steps faltering. That was not what she expected him to say. “…What? How could you possibly do that?” 

 

He didn’t answer right away. His gaze dipped toward the ground, shoulders drawn in as though he suddenly felt too big in his own frame. His index fingers tapped together in a nervous little rhythm before he forced himself to look back up at her.

 

His voice was soft, sheepish. “I… have healing saliva. But, you probably already know that… right?

 

Uzi blinked. For a second, she thought she’d misheard him. But when it sank in, her face went blank. Is he being serious… 

 

She stared at him flatly before speaking, her tone dry as dust. “…So what—you want to lick my hand?” 

 

N’s response almost instant—his eyes flew wide open, hands shooting up in frantic denial. “Wha—no! No, that’s not—” His voice trailed off as his gaze dropped again, his posture folding in on itself. He hesitated, clearly waging an internal battle, before sneaking a quick glance back at her. His expression softened into something sheepishly resigned, and he muttered, almost under his breath, “…Pretty much.”

 

Uzi just stood there, processing, her thoughts caught somewhere between horrified disbelief and the absurd urge to laugh. She blinked at him, her mind stumbling over the words he’d just said.

 

Healing saliva. Her hand. Licking it. That was… so weird. Weird in a way she didn’t even want to start unpacking, because if she did, her brain would just spiral into places she definitely wasn’t prepared for. 

 

But then—hadn’t he already frickin’ done that before?!

 

The thought crashed back into her memory with a weight that made her chest tighten.

 

That night—when the two of them had snuck into the school to investigate that students murder—back before she knew anything about what he was. When V had ambushed them, attacking her and clawing her shoulder open. Uzi recalled passing out from oil loss, and then waking up in N’s car with her arm bandaged. She didn’t really want to think about the conversation that had followed that right now… but it was irrelevant at this point, anyways.

 

It was only the next day when she took off that bandage, and her wound was completely gone. She demanded that N meet with her to explain—she thought he had done something to her, or what if she had been turned into whatever the hell he was?!…But, after his explanation of what happened in that coffee shop, she might’ve preferred that over what he actually did.

 

At least she wasn’t unconscious this time, and she could actually make the choice…

 

Her stomach twisted at the thought. On one hand, literally, the cut was irritating, still oozing little streaks of oil every time she moved wrong. It would be convenient to have it gone…  

 

But the idea of him doing that, while she was awake, while she could feel it… She didn’t know if she could handle how strange that would be. A shiver prickled at the back of her neck just imagining it.

 

Uzi tried to reason with herself, forcing her thoughts into some kind of order. If she were being logical, the choice was obvious—say yes, let him do it, and the stupid cut would be gone. No more oil leaking, no more stinging every time she shifted her hand wrong. Easy.

 

But then there was the other side of it—the crawling, awkward tension that would come from… from that . Would the relief be worth the inevitable weirdness? She honestly wasn’t sure.

 

She stole a glance at him, catching the way his eyes lingered on her before darting away like he’d been caught doing something he shouldn’t. That sheepish little motion made her chest tighten. To hell with it…

 

Uzi exhaled a sharp sigh, her shoulders slumping. “Fine,” she muttered, more to herself than him. “Sure. I guess…

 

The change in him was instant. His posture lifted, his eyes brightened, and a shy smile flickered across his face. He looked like he’d just been handed a small miracle. Uzi felt her own face warm and promptly looked away before he could say anything.

 

Not here, though,” she added quickly, cutting off whatever words were about to leave his mouth. “I’m not letting you do that in the middle of the sidewalk.”

 

She cast a glance around them, desperate for a distraction. Just ahead, nestled at the corner of the street, was the café they’d been walking toward this whole time. Uzi latched onto it.

 

“Look,” she said, gesturing toward it. “We’re here anyway. We can just… wait till later. We’ll figure something out.”

 

When she glanced back at him, she froze.

 

His eyes weren’t on the café. They were darting around, quick and sharp, as if scanning the space for something. There was an edge to it, not quite panic, but close enough to make her pulse skip. Why did he look so… frantic?

 

Her brows furrowed in confusion, but before she could voice it, he pulled himself back together. His gaze settled on her again, more steady now, though his voice carried a quiet urgency.

 

“We don’t have to wait,” he said, his tone soft but insistent. “There’s an alley right next to the café. We could go there.”

 

The suggestion made her stomach twist. A dark alley, just the two of them, for something this bizarre. She wasn’t sure if the cut on her hand was worth that .

 

…But then again, what did she have to lose? Her hand would just be healed quicker, and she wouldn’t risk irritating the wound again because it’d be gone, just like that.

 

Uzi let out a long, defeated sigh, her shoulders sagging. “Fine. Whatever,” she muttered. “But this better be quick.”

 

N gave a small nod, his expression unusually serious, and the two of them kept walking. They weaved through the crowd, sidestepping other drones along the sidewalk until the mouth of the alley finally loomed ahead.

 

Uzi slowed to a halt, staring into the shadowy gap between the buildings. The place looked exactly how she expected—narrow, dark, and unwelcoming, like the kind of spot you’d see in a horror movie right before something terrible happened. Her arms folded over her chest, her unease prickling sharper by the second.

 

She tilted her head toward N, her voice edged with protest. “Do we really have to do this here ? I mean, seriously—we can just wait. It’s not like I’m dying from this cut or anything. Don’t worry, though—I don’t… mind…” Her words faltered, and she glanced at the gloomy stretch of brick and shadow. “…I just don’t want to go in there.

 

Before she could say more, something caught her off guard. N’s hand shifted closer, and for a fleeting second she thought he was reaching for hers. Instead, his fingers lightly hooked onto the sleeve of her hoodie at her wrist. It was such a small, almost tentative gesture, but it rooted her in place. She looked up at him, confusion written across her face.

 

He wasn’t even looking at her—his gaze seemed distant, like he hadn’t heard a single word she’d said. His grip on her sleeve wasn’t tight, just… hesitant, like he needed the anchor more than she did.

 

“N?” she called softly, shifting her weight.

 

He blinked, like she’d just pulled him out of a trance, and gave his head a quick shake. His eyes flicked back to hers, more focused now, though there was still a trace of something unreadable lingering in them.

 

“It’ll only take a minute,” he said quietly, his voice gentle but insistent. “I promise.” N’s lips curved into a small smile, the kind that wasn’t flashy or overdone—just soft, almost apologetic.

 

Uzi exhaled sharply through her nose and rolled her eyes. Not because she was irritated at him, not really. More because of herself, because she was actually letting this whole ridiculous situation happen.

 

Still… she couldn’t ignore the thought gnawing at her. For all the strangeness of his ‘method,’ at least he cared enough to offer. Enough to notice her discomfort in the first place, and then try to fix it. That counted for something, didn’t it?

 

His hand tugged gently at her sleeve again, pulling her forward, and though the hold was light—barely there, really—she allowed it.

 

She could’ve pulled free at any second, and she knew it. The strange part was she didn’t. Some stubborn part of her brain whispered that she should yank her arm back and march out of this stupid alley, but her feet stayed planted right in step with his.

 

The deeper they walked, the dimmer the world became. Sunlight narrowed into a thin strip between the tall buildings, casting pale light across the cracked pavement and leaving most of the space in muted shadow.

 

The air here felt still, oddly muffled, like the noise of the street outside couldn’t reach them.

 

Uzi’s gaze flicked around uneasily as they passed: rusted doors set into brick walls, a line of dented trash cans shoved against one side, and a ladder stretching upward into who knew where. It wasn’t the most comforting place to stop, but then again, she doubted anywhere would’ve been.

 

They came to a halt near the center of the alley, where the shadows pooled thicker. N finally let go of her sleeve, the fabric slipping free from his fingers. Uzi felt an odd twinge at the loss of contact, as if it left her standing more exposed than before. She wasn’t going to let that get to her, though.

 

Now, with nothing to distract her, she had no choice but to look up at him. “So?” Uzi finally broke the silence, folding her arms, already wanting this to be over.

 

N blinked, his lips tugging into that diffident grin he always seemed to wear when he wasn’t sure what to do. One hand rose to the back of his neck, rubbing there as though he could smooth away his awkwardness. “Right… yeah.” His voice trailed, but after a second he steadied himself, letting his hand fall.

 

Then he reached for hers. The motion was hesitant, almost reverent, like he was afraid she might pull back at the last second. When his fingers finally curled around hers, the touch was light, careful—like he was holding something fragile that might shatter if he squeezed too tightly.

 

Uzi tried not to stiffen under the gentleness, though her pulse ticked uncomfortably fast in her throat. She tried to distract herself, asking flatly, “…How long do you think it’ll take to heal?”

 

N’s eyes had been locked on her hand, studying it with far more concentration than seemed necessary. At her words, his gaze flicked up, meeting hers for a heartbeat before sliding away again. “A few minutes,” he murmured. “It… depends on the wound. How deep it is.”

 

He carefully turned her hand over to expose her palm, his thumb brushing across her knuckles in the process. Uzi’s breath hitched—quiet, almost inaudible—as his touch lingered just long enough to send a nervous jolt through her. Then, with almost painful delicacy, he let his fingers trace just beside the cut. The caress was so gentle it tickled, but the gesture carried a weight she didn’t know how to process.

 

“This must’ve hurt…” N said softly, almost more to himself than to her.

 

Uzi wanted to scoff. Her lips twitched, and she forced out a flat, almost bored reply: “Yeah. Felt great. Probably got tetanus too, so… bonus.”

 

The corner of N’s mouth lifted in a faint smile, his eyes softening in that irritatingly earnest way that made her want to look anywhere but at him.

 

N’s attention never strayed from her hand, his expression unusually focused, almost solemn. After what felt like an eternity of silence, he finally moved—lifting her hand closer, as though weighing a decision. Then, before Uzi could fully process it, he brought her palm to his mouth.

 

Her breath caught sharply when his tongue pressed against the wound, warm and strange, dragging slowly across it. Uzi winced, her face twisting slightly as the cut gave a dull sting under the sudden contact.

 

The sensation itself wasn’t painful, not exactly—more bizarre than anything, like someone brushing over your skin with a wet paint brush.

 

And worse than the feeling itself was the awareness of who was doing it. Her cheeks burned hot, embarrassment prickling at her neck as the thought hit her all at once: N—adorable, awkward, ridiculous N—was the one with his mouth on her hand.

 

He repeated the motion, another slow drag, deliberate and careful. Uzi couldn’t tell if it was actually necessary or if he was just being thorough. Either way, the second pass made her spine jolt with an involuntary shiver. She wanted to snatch her hand back, but her body felt locked in place, stiff with discomfort and something else she refused to name. 

 

When he finally drew away, he didn’t look up immediately. His gaze remained fixed stubbornly on her hand, as though watching for some invisible sign of progress.


Uzi, her patience running thin, narrowed her eyes and asked curtly, “Well? You done?”

 

The words seemed to jolt him. N blinked rapidly, like he’d forgotten where he was, before glancing up at her. “Y–yeah,” he stammered, voice tripping over itself. “I mean—yes. Sorry if that was, um… weird.” The nervous fidgeting of his hands betrayed the fact that he already knew it was.

 

Uzi yanked her hand back, clutching it toward her chest. For a split second, she had to resist the urge to smear it against her hoodie just to rid herself of the lingering dampness. Her expression hardened into a scowl as she leveled him with a sharp look.

 

“We’re never speaking of this again,” she said flatly, her voice laced with finality. 

 

Inside, though, her stomach twisted—half from mortification, half from a feeling she could not, and absolutely would not, try to put into words. 

 

N gave a quick, nervous nod, forcing a crooked grin. “Right. Consider it repressed,” he said, the words coming out a touch too brightly, like he was trying to patch over the awkwardness with humor.

 

Uzi exhaled through her nose, about to brush the whole thing off, when her eyes caught on something. She squinted, leaning ever so slightly forward. “Uh… you’ve got a little…” She trailed off, not finishing the sentence, and instead tapped a finger to the corner of her own mouth in demonstration.

 

N blinked, confused at first, before realization dawned on his face. His eyes widened slightly, and without thinking, he darted his tongue out and swiped the oil smudge away.

 

Uzi’s expression dropped flat as stone, her deadpan stare heavy enough to crush.

 

It took a beat before N registered what he’d just done. His shoulders tensed, before he hurriedly scrubbed the spot with his sleeve, as though trying to undo the moment entirely. His gaze flicked to Uzi again, the apology already forming on his lips, his whole posture sheepish and guilty.

 

But Uzi wasn’t about to let him drag this out.

 

Before he could get a single word out, she reached forward, snatching his hand with her uninjured right one. She gave a tug—not harsh, just firm enough to make her point clear—and started walking them both out of the alley.

 

N stumbled a half step at the sudden pull, nearly tripping over his own feet, before catching himself and falling into stride beside her. His confusion was written plain across his face as he called after her softly, “Uzi–?

 

She didn’t glance back. The heat rising in her cheeks, that strange knot of embarrassment and something more tangled up with it, was enough to keep her eyes forward.

 

Her grip on his hand tightened just slightly as she muttered, low and curt, “Let’s just… go eat.”

Notes:

I don’t have much to say in this end notes (Edit: this was an unintentional lie. I in fact *do* have a lot to say)

Or well I probably do, but I don’t have much time to write it rn. I’ll probs come back and edit it in a bit!!

Js give me like, an hour, I’ll be back 😭🙏

Edit: Okay I’m back. I think it’s been almost exactly an hour, so that’s great 😃👍

OKAY SO the way I thought abt the idea for the stuff that happened in this chapter was pretty much me improvising the whole thing. I had a *very* general idea that just struck me a while ago, and I was like “………what if she gets injured and he offers to ‘heal’ her js cuz he’s lowkey feining but then also cares abt her—but mostly he’s feining and js trying to act like he’s not-“ I KNOW I KNOW how that sounds bruv but like, I *really* wanted to write it out and try and figure out how to word it without it seeming cringy.

Back to what I was explaining abt me improvising, I wrote pretty much all of that yesterday in one sitting, but usually when I write a chapter, I write out a few bullet points on the events/general things I want to happen, and then I write a draft of that and then revise and edit it until I’m happy. But the *this*, I literally had nothing planned other than again, the general idea or wtv, so I had to dig deep into the crevices of my brain to come up with ts 😭🤚

Hope that all makes sense, I’m js kinda rambling at this point

But yeah I actually really like how this turned out, was a lot better than I initially thought it’d be. And also I think the next chapter kinda saves it (*not* saying that this chapter is bad- idk if that makes sense, but I can’t think of a better way to word it- sorry 🤷) what I mean by that is so much stuff is gonna happen in the next chapter (NOT bad stuff I promise) so it’s kinda like a pallet cleanser after all ts that happened in this chapter 😭

I loved writing their little dialogue in this chapter. Idk but it js makes sense to me that Uzi would love rats. And probably raccoons too but that’s not relevant rn. And then N isn’t tryna hate on her or anything but he literally only cares abt dogs (he’s not heartless, I bet he loves a majority of animals. But for whatever reason he’s js fixated on dogs and knows a shit ton abt them, like he’s the guy to js say random dog facts any time he gets the chance, or like know a bunch of dog breeds from memory.) So when he looks at a dog, and then sees a frickin sewer rat that’s like, ‘greasy’, (as he said) he’s js like 😬😬

But then Uzi loves rats and has a bunch of rat stuffed animals (which all have individual names) but she’d never admit that to anyone in fear of being seen as cringe 🙂‍↕️

That’s a really random headcannon that I literally never thought abt until the topic randomly came up in this chapter, so obviously I had to think more abt it than js a surface level thing, right?!?!??! And also I think that *has* to be a valid headcannon too, cuz like it’s not extremely far fetched- right 🥲

The next chapter should be released maybe Friday or Saturday, idk. One of those. It’s going to be really dialogue heavy btw, and I think it’ll be really nice. Idk if this is *too* much of a spoiler to say, but this chapter followed by the next few are gonna be the calm before the storm………… can’t say any more than that though 🫣

Promise though it’s not gonna be like, next chapter is wholesome (kind of- you’ll understand what I mean when I post it-) and then the one after is gonna be insane. The pacing is gonna be *way* better than that.

Only other thing I have to say is, there’s 2 people who wrote fics inspired (using that word loosely. It’s more so that apparently my fic inspired them to js write in general ((both of them said that I’m pretty sure, correct me if I’m wrong- yall know who u are)) which is so flattering cuz I never would’ve thought anyone would say that ever 🥹 when I started this fic, I didn’t think it’d pick up any traction tbh. Was really js posting this for my own self indulgence cuz I really wanted to write a high school AU from a media I liked, and MD happened to be the one I chose. Wrote like 15 chapters then I thought might as well post it cuz literally why not- this way I’ll never accidentally delete it. But then look where I am now- And I’m still writing this for my own enjoyment but it’s nice to know other people like it too 😖)

BUT YEAH the entire reason I brought that up was cuz yall should go check out those fics cuz yes

Gonna try and figure out how to link them below!!!

Also I appreciate all of yall who are still reading after 90 chapters, esp those who have been here since day one 😫 not tryna undermine anyone who’s new here though, yall are awesome as well 🫶

Ok that’s everything I had to say. Again, next chapter will be posted Friday or Saturday. Byeeee!

Chapter 93: Café

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The bell above the café door chimed as they stepped inside, the warm scent of roasted coffee, as well as the sounds of plates and glasses clanking companied by a faint chatter greeting them.

 

Uzi stuffed her hands in her hoodie pocket, not offering much in the way of conversation while they ordered—the memory of the alley clung stubbornly to the back of her mind. The idea of talking right now seemed particularly unappealing.

 

Now, with their food paid for and a receipt with their order number in her hand, N tilted his head toward her, his tone gentle but uncertain. “So, where do you wanna sit?”

 

Uzi hesitated, the question catching her off guard more than it should have. Typically, she’d probably struggle to decide on something and insist that N choose, but the sharp chill of the café’s air conditioning made her recoil slightly. She rubbed her sleeve along her arm, eyes flicking toward the glass front where sunlight spilled across the tables outside.

 

“Out there,” she said, pointing toward the small tables scattered just beyond the entrance. Her voice was brisk, but it wasn’t dismissive—just practical. “It’s warmer.”

 

N followed her gesture, then looked back at her with a quiet smile, his eyes softening. “Sounds great. It is kinda chilly in here.” 

 

She stared at him for a moment, unsure what to make of his ease. There was no stiffness in his expression, no trace of the awkward mess they’d stumbled through minutes ago. Either he was pretending nothing had happened, or he was genuinely that quick to let it go.

 

Uzi fiddled with the sleeve of her hoodie, her brow furrowing. She wished she could do that—slip past uncomfortable moments like they were nothing but cracks in the sidewalk. For her, though, things lingered. They clung—like the scent of a skunk on your clothes. Even now, with his smile so casual, she still felt a tinge of incessant awkwardness twisting in her chest.

 

N stepped just ahead of her, lightly brushing her shoulder as he walked past. It might’ve been accidental—yet it snapped Uzi from the stewing of her own thoughts. She blinked, stiffening slightly, realizing she hadn’t moved when she should have.

 

N glanced back at her as he headed for the front door, his voice soft with a tinge of teasing confusion. “You coming?”

 

Duh,” she muttered, trying to inject stolidity into her tone. She pushed past the embarrassment crawling up her neck, forcing her expression into something flat, like nothing had happened at all. Still, the sting of being caught zoning out clung to her. She trailed after him, pressing her lips together to keep from making it obvious.

 

They stepped outside into the warmer air, sunlight spilling across the rows of small tables. N gravitated toward one tucked beneath the shade of a wide umbrella; the top of it was square, and a chair flanked either side. Uzi sat first, folding her arms on the edge of the table like she was anchoring herself there, while N took the chair across from her, his posture open and relaxed in contrast to her guarded one.

 

A silence stretched between them—thin, taut, and somehow louder than the soft clatter of silverware and faint hum of conversation that seeped out from inside the café. Uzi found herself staring at him without meaning to, and when she realized he was doing the same, her face grew hot. She quickly shifted her gaze to the table’s surface, as if the scratched metal patterns there were suddenly fascinating.

 

N, perhaps sensing the heaviness of the pause, leaned forward slightly, his voice breaking the quiet with tentative warmth. “So… are you looking forward to what’s planned tomorrow?”

 

Uzi glanced back at him, caught between relief that he’d spoken and the renewed unpleasantness of being put on the spot.

 

Nevertheless, she leaned back in her chair, giving a small shrug, her voice deliberately casual. “Honestly? I don’t even know what we’re doing. Didn’t care enough to remember.”

 

N blinked at her, then chuckled under his breath, the sound light and a little incredulous. “Wait—seriously? Didn’t I already tell you all the stuff they planned? You know, after you completely missed the announcements on the first day?”

 

Her gaze darted away, and her lips pressed into a thin line. Oh. Right. He had. She remembered now—how he’d patiently gone over the whole schedule with her, making sure she knew what was going on. A flicker of guilt tugged at her, sharp and irritating. Not because she forgot the trip details, but because she forgot his effort, and made it seem like she couldn’t care less . Still, she wasn’t about to let that show.

 

She crossed her arms, feigning indifference, and muttered, “Oh—yeah… That’s not on you, though—it’s just… the trip itself. Kind of boring.”

 

N’s expression shifted—his smile faltered just a touch, his brows drawing the faintest crease. Not angry. Not hurt, really. More like very slight disappointed. His voice was soft when he replied, carrying that trace of wistfulness. “That’s too bad. I was hoping you’d be having a little more fun with it.”

 

Uzi’s chest tightened, the guilt nudging harder this time. She hated that she cared what her words did to him, but she couldn’t ignore the twinge in her stomach at seeing his expression dip like that. Quickly, she leaned forward on her elbows, a faint scowl on her face that didn’t match her words. “Hey, I never said I wasn’t having fun. It’s… fine, I guess. I kind of like it….” 

 

The words hung in the air a moment too long—and she noticed that N raised an eyebrow, as if he didn’t entirely believe her. It probably wasn’t on purpose, but it made Uzi regretted letting those words slip. Kind of like it. What was she even saying? That wasn’t true—not in the straightforward sense, anyway.

 

If she actually stopped to tally things up, the trip had been one disaster after another.

 

The first day she’d been saddled with J as a roommate—out of everyone possible, her. Then she learned J wasn’t just a minor nuisance, but consciouslyplotting her death—according to V.

 

And then, on the second day, there was N… their—no, her blow-up argument, the way she’d snapped at him, pushed him away, and treated him worse than he deserved. Even if it was somewhat resolved in the end, that entire day had felt like one long mess of mistakes she couldn’t undo.

 

But then there’d been last night.

 

Her face warmed as the memory threatened to surface, unbidden—in the alcove, the way he kissed her, the way he whimpered her name, the way— 

 

What the actual hell, Uzi?! There’s a time and place, please shut up

 

She shoved aside those thoughts as quickly as she could, mentally snapping at herself.

 

If she was being completely honest, the trip as a whole had been awful. Stressful, dangerous, emotionally draining… but it hadn’t been empty.

 

She hadn’t spent it sulking in corners, counting the minutes until it ended. There were moments—good ones—that slipped through the cracks.

 

She really enjoyed hanging out with her friends. Her banter with Thad, Rebecca and Emily being reassuring of her roommate situation, even offering to let her stay in their room if Lizzy became too intolerable. Oh and Darren—…he was just kinda there. But that wasn’t a bad thing? …She really should talk to him more. That was beside the point, though. 

 

And then there was N.

 

Spending time with him—even when it was complicated, even when it hurt—had been something she didn’t know how to categorize. Yesterday had nearly broken them, but they’d managed to patch things up. Clumsily, imperfectly, but enough. Sitting here now, she realized moments like this with him were the parts she was clinging to, the ones she wanted to cling to. 

 

So maybe she hadn’t lied when she said she liked it. Maybe she just wasn’t ready to admit that what she liked wasn’t the trip itself—it was the company she kept during it.

 

Her arms tightened across her chest, as though bracing against the vulnerability of her own thoughts. She hated that she even had to dissect this much, but her mind refused to leave it simple.

 

Uzi shifted her gaze back toward him, and before she could stop herself, impulsively the words slipped out—low, almost casual, but more heartfelt than she’d intended. “Okay, fine, I don’t like the trip itself at all. But… even if it does suck, I’m glad I get to be around you.” As she admitted this, a small, barely there smile tugged at her lips. 

For a heartbeat, N just blinked at her, as though the thought had knocked the air from his chest. His eyes widened a tad, then softened in an instant, filling with a kind of warmth that made her want to squirm in her seat. The corners of his mouth lifted into a smile so genuine it almost looked giddy, like he could hardly believe she’d actually said that.

 

“You… like being around me?” he asked, hopeful, voice catching with a mix of disbelief and excitement. If he had a tail, Uzi was sure it would’ve been wagging so hard it would knock the chair over.

 

Her instinct kicked in before her brain caught up. She deadpanned, and gave a short scoff, jerking her gaze away as if their eye contact was suddenly unbearable. “I guess,” she muttered, hugging her arms even tighter across her chest as if that might shield her from how exposed she suddenly felt. “It’s not like I care or anything.”

 

Her words were sharp, but her cheeks betrayed her, tinging a hue of pink as she risked another glance at him.

 

N hadn’t bought her act for even a second.

 

He was still smiling at her, softer this time, like he could see straight through her flimsy defenses and didn’t mind one bit. The way his gaze softened only made her face burn hotter, and yet… she didn’t really want him to stop looking at her that way.

 

Mercifully, he seemed to realize she was desperate for the subject to shift, because after a beat, he adjusted in his seat and spoke. “So,” he said gently, as if easing her out of the tension she’d wrapped herself in, “tomorrow we’re heading to the planetarium.”

 

Uzi tilted her head slightly, brow furrowing when N suddenly mentioned the planetarium. “...What?” she asked, unsure why he’d dropped that word out of nowhere.

 

N, looking a little sheepish, rubbed the back of his neck and clarified, “That’s where we’re going tomorrow. For the trip. Since you said you didn’t know.”

 

Realization clicked in, and Uzi gave a small nod. “Right.” She let the word hang a second before continuing, “I mean, I wouldn’t say I’m necessarily looking forward to it—not in a bad way, though,” she shrugs, “Never been to one before. Seems pretty cool from what I’ve heard about them at least.” 

 

N perked up a little at that, nodding along, his eyes lighting with interest. “Have you ever seen pictures of one before?”

 

Uzi hesitated, drumming her fingers lightly on the table as she thought. “I don’t… think so? Maybe? I’m not sure.” She glanced up at him, quirking a brow. “They’re the rooms with the big projector overhead, right? With all the planets and stuff?”

 

N shrugged, seeming unsure, “Sort of. That’s part of it, yeah. But there’s more to it than that—it’s more like… the whole room makes you feel like you’re floating in space.” His tone was warm, almost reverent, like he was remembering it instead of just describing it. Then he added, “Oh—and the one we’re going to is inside a natural history museum. So we might get to look around there first, if you want.”

 

Uzi leaned back in her chair, arms folding again as her gaze flicked briefly to the side. She made a show of sounding indifferent, even though she couldn’t deny that the way N described it tugged at her curiosity. “Eh. Maybe. If I feel like it, I’ll look.” She paused, then allowed a small, reluctant smirk. “The planet-whatever thing sounds cooler, though. I’ll probably just head straight there.”

 

Even as she tried to act dismissive, part of her found herself wondering what it would actually be like—lying back in some huge, dark room while the sky stretched overhead, a thousand stars right above her. The thought stirred something she couldn’t quite name.

 

N’s shoulders lifted with an easy shrug, though his smile dimmed a little, softening into something more reserved. “I’ll probably wander through the museum first,” he admitted. Then, after a brief pause, his eyes flicked back to hers and brightened again. “But… if you want, we can meet in the planetarium after.”

 

The way he said it—like it was already a given, like of course they’d end up there together—caught Uzi off guard.

 

Her chest gave the faintest flutter, and she sat up just a touch straighter before she could stop herself. The realization that she didn’t mind his assumption one bit left her both flustered and… quietly pleased.

 

She fought tooth and nail to keep her expression neutral, her tone nonchalant, as she answered, “Yeah. That’d be… great.”

 

The word lingered more warmly than she intended, so she quickly filled the silence with another question. “So… have you actually been to one before? You sound like you know what you’re talking about.”

 

N’s whole face lit up at that, as if he’d been waiting for her to ask. “Yeah, once! Back in middle school. V and I went together.” His tone was bright, almost nostalgic, the memory clearly a fond one.

 

Uzi blinked, raising one brow slightly. Right—he mentioned many times before that him and V grew up together. Then, a thought came without warning, slipping out of her mouth before she could stop it. “...Was it a date?”

 

N blinked rapidly at her question, his usual easy composure faltering. “What? No—? it wasn’t—” His voice stumbled over itself before cutting off. He looked away, eyes narrowing in thought, then lifted a hand to rub at the back of his neck with a meek little laugh. “I mean… if I’m being honest, it probably felt more… romantic to me than it did to V. I still liked her back then.”

 

Uzi felt her chest tighten, a flicker of something unwelcome and sharp worming its way into her thoughts. He had said before—more than once—how long he’d carried that crush on V.

 

She wasn’t angry or upset, not really. It was ancient history at this point. Still, she caught herself frowning ever so slightly before quickly smoothing her expression.

 

It was stupid to let it bother her when she knew, without a doubt, that his feelings had changed. He’d confessed to her. He wanted her. And… there had obviously been other things too, things she wasn’t about to start reliving right here in the middle of a conversation. 

 

She gave her head a subtle shake, trying to shove the thought away before her cheeks flushed yet again.

 

But once her mind had been tugged in that direction, another question began to form, unbidden but insistent.

 

What were they, exactly?

 

He liked her. She liked him. That much was obvious. But they weren’t dating, not officially, and the idea of asking him felt like dangling herself over a cliff’s edge without a safety net. Just the thought of blurting it out made her circuits feel like they were tying themselves into knots.

 

She had thought about this too many times before, circling the same questions, always stopping short of actually doing anything about it.

 

Her eyes drifted back to him, watching his somewhat bashful expression as he scratched at the back of his neck, and for the first time it hit her that maybe now was the perfect opportunity.

 

The perfect moment to just ask.

 

To finally clear the air.

 

Her throat felt dry. How in the world was she supposed to even word it? One wrong phrasing, and she’d sound like an idiot. Or worse—clingy.

 

Wait… why did that even matter to her at this point, though? If anything, he was clingy, and probably didn’t mind if she was. And that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, though—was it? Was he too much for her? Was she too much for him? How was this not overwhelming him too—did he just not think about these things?!

 

She hugged her arms closer across her chest, heart pounding, mind racing as the words tangled and caught in her throat.

 

Uzi’s mind was caught in a tug-of-war—half of her screaming to just spit the question out, the other half begging her to bury it and never bring it up. Her jaw tightened, thoughts swirling—until N’s voice suddenly broke through.

 

“Hey, shouldn’t our food be ready by now?” He tilted his head slightly when he asked her, before glancing toward the café.

 

The interruption hit her like a rope tossed to someone already drowning.

 

Relief washed through her chest, thinly veiled by a quiet exhale. Yeah. She wasn’t going to ask. Not now. Not when she didn’t even know how to start. She could tell herself later was better, that there would be a better time. Even if deep down, she knew she was just stalling. Again. 

 

Right,” she muttered, giving a short nod as she shoved the nagging thoughts to the back of her mind. Her hand slipped into her pocket, brushing the crumpled receipt she’d been carrying. She tugged it out and held it up. “I’ll go grab it.”

 

N straightened in his chair, ever quick to offer. “I can get it for us, if you want—”

 

But Uzi cut him off with a small shake of her head. “It’s fine. I’ve got it.” Her tone wasn’t sharp, but firm enough that he let it drop.

 

After a beat, she smirked barely and added, “Y’know, you don’t always have to be so… polite all the time.”

 

The comment had barely left her lips before she noticed the shift in his expression. His posture shrank a little, shoulders drawing in. His gaze darted aside, and he gave a sheepish little half-smile. “Sorry,” he mumbled, almost automatically, as though he genuinely felt bad for it.

 

Uzi blinked, her smirk faltering. She hadn’t meant it as a jab. Her eyes softened, and she shook her head lightly. “Hey, no—it’s alright. Really.”

 

For a brief moment, silence lingered between them, warm but fragile. Then Uzi pushed herself up from her chair, brushing her jacket straight with quick hands. “I’ll be right back,” she said, glancing back at him with a note of reassurance in her tone.

 

N gave her a small nod, still looking a bit sheepish but managing a small smile. His eyes followed her for a second longer before she turned toward the café, her boots clinking softly against the ground as she headed off.

 

When she finally got there, the moment Uzi pushed open the door, a blast of frigid air hit her square in the face. She sucked in a sharp breath and immediately hunched her shoulders against it, shivering.

 

What the hell—were the café staff penguins or something?! She muttered a few words illegally under her breath, probably a complaint. Her lips twisted into a small grimace before she gave her head a faint shake. Whatever. Not worth thinking about.

 

Her hand slipped into her pocket, fishing out the thin slip of paper. The number 32 was stamped neatly across the top, the paper severely crumpled from how she’d shoved it in her pocket.

 

She turned it over idly as she walked toward the front, her thoughts drifting—until something else snagged her attention.

 

Not the paper. Her hand. 

 

She slowed, eyes narrowing as she lifted it up under the ambient café lights.

 

The ugly gash she’d accidentally carved into herself earlier was… barely there now. Just a faint little line across the metal, so small it could be mistaken for a scratch.

 

Her brows furrowed. So… what N did had actually worked.

 

A shiver ran down her spine that had nothing to do with the overzealous air conditioning. She hadn’t forgotten the strange, uncomfortable memory of the alley—his tongue brushing her hand, how her systems had sparked with static as he’d—ugh.

 

She shook her head sharply, grimacing. It was gross when she thought about it too literally. Gross and weird and somehow way too intimate. And yet…

 

Her eyes lingered on the basically-healed hand. She hadn’t even bothered to wash it afterward. Not because she didn’t notice—she definitely did —but because, honestly, she didn’t care enough to. Not really. If it had disgusted her, she would’ve scrubbed until her fingers were raw. But she hadn’t. Which meant… maybe she didn’t actually mind as much as she wanted to think she did.

 

Her stomach tightened, and she shoved that thought down hard, stuffing the receipt back into her pocket. Now wasn’t the time to spiral about that .

 

Focus. Food first.

 

She straightened her shoulders and made her way toward the counter, weaving past a cluster of drones waiting on their own orders. Her boots clicked dully against the polished floor, her impatience urging her steps forward. The sooner she grabbed their food, the sooner she could head back outside.

 

And that thought—more than anything—was what kept her moving. Because as much as she tried to play it off, her chest buzzed with a quiet anticipation at the idea of sitting back down across from N.

 

Even if some weird, unrelenting stubbornness in her hated to admit it… she wanted more of it. Wanted to see what else he’d say, what else she’d feel when those odd, awkward little smiles of his were directed at her.

 

The day had started in chaos, her nerves scraped raw. But now? Now it was tilting into something better. Something warmer.

 

And she couldn’t help but hope it would stay that way.

Notes:

Subtle foreshadowing?

I will not confirm nor deny

Anyways, sorry for the long wait between chapters recently. Have been super busy with life stuff

OMG I do have news though… kind of.

I’ve been watching a SHIT TON of videos abt story telling and literature and shit like that, like 3 hour long videos of someone explaining stuff around that topic and stuff, I kid u not- so hopefully my writing improves somewhat soon. I don’t think it’s *terrible* now, but could be better. Also, I recently discovered thesaurus.com or wtv it’s called, because somehow my dumbass never thought to look at it. I check for synonyms of words so I don’t accidentally make stuff repetitive, but I js like, double tapped the word and js clicked ‘look up’, and it gives me a little definition and like a few synonyms, but now I have the opportunity to use WAY better wording than I have been.

Oh yeah also, the reason I was watching all those videos isn’t what u think 🤓☝️ (gotta do a shameless plug here-) I’m actually planning on making a webcomic cuz I have an absolutely amazing idea (in my opinion) and also I think it’s really original cuz I’ve never heard of anyone doing the concept of what the world I’ve thought of is before.

Skip to the thing that says ‘skip here’ in all caps with the little * signs if u don’t wanna read all ts- sorry, I started talking about it, so I can’t stop myself now

So basically… I’m not gonna describe what the world is cuz like, I’m very paranoid someone is gonna take the idea (even though there’s an insanely rare chance of that actually happening… IM PARANOID OKAY, SORRY 🤬) but like, to describe it without describing it- the story takes place in a dystopian society a couple hundred years after the event that caused the world to end-but-not-end happened. The setting of it is kinda medieval, but not?? Like, the best way I can describe this is a mix of Disenchantment (specifically the steampunk land but like it’s not steampunk…. Idk how to describe this without giving it away.) and Arcane but then also its own thing- if that makes sense. There’s a whole caste system, and there’s a bunch of themes of classism and racism (or well, more like speciesism, kind of- there’s way more context I promise) cuz that’s js how the society functions- tying back to the whole caste system thing. There’s no monarch though, more js like nobles/aristocrats, but then different.

The story follows this one girl who’s considered the middle class of the society (like, she’s not a ‘peasant,’ but definitely isn’t wealthy either. Peasant isn’t even a word used in this universe. She’s js kinda a citizen ig.) and she and her little friend group (of 3 other people) are thieves who steal from wealthier people who live in the area they live. At one point, she discovers something that she has no idea how to handle. Ik this sounds kinda cliche and *extremely* vague to say but I *promise* there’s more to it

There’s really nothing else I can say that’ll actually make sense without spoiling everything. Oh also there’s a major romantic subplot between the MC and someone else that’s a *really* slow burn, cuz I physically cannot function without some sort of slow burn in something I’m writing 😃👍

Also did I mention there’s lovecraftian elements to the story? Like that are extremely important and relevant but aren’t gonna js be thrown in ur face immediately like some stories do with their big exposition dump in the beginning?

And did I mention that all the characters are human-animal hybrids, but it’s not js ‘cuz I wanted to,’ like there’s a genuine in depth reason? (That’s where the whole caste system/speciest thing I mentioned comes into play, cuz some species are seen as inferior to others.) The best way I can describe how they look is like some of the characters in Sweet Tooth. If you know what that is, you’re the coolest person ever.

**SKIP HERE**

Okay, so I ran out of characters for what I initially wrote, so I’m js gonna put it in a comment cuz yes.

Back to what’s *actually* relevant, this fic-

The next chapter should be posted Wednesday or Thursday!

This chapter isn’t necessarily my favorite in the way it turned out, but I do like the dialogue between Uzi and N a lot. Expect an even heavier amount of dialogue in the next chapter- sorry not sorry 😭🤚

FUCK I ran out of characters again so I’ll js put the other stuff I wrote that actually pertained to this chapter in the comment as well. Curse you, 5000 characters limit for the end notes 🤬

I would js continue reading these end notes from here in the comments, if u feel like it. Gonna out another one of those *skip* things in case u don’t want to read me yapping abt my original story that’s heavily wip 🤓☝️

Chapter 94: Radiance

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The door gave way with a muted creak as Uzi nudged it open with her shoulder, carefully balancing the tray in her hands. On the tray sat a small plate with her own order: a crêpe folded neatly, dusted with a whisper of powdered sugar, but nowhere near the decadent mountain of strawberries and syrup she’d gone for last time she ate here.

 

Even though she hadn’t had breakfast, or even eaten a single thing all morning, her appetite wasn’t really there. The thought of something light was easier to stomach.

 

Beside the crêpe, perched in a delicate little cup, was the espresso she couldn’t resist. The milk foam had been swirled into the shape of a cat, its tail curling in a delicate loop. She didn’t even like coffee much—she’d take the jittery punch of an energy drink over it any day—but the design was too cute to pass up. Seeing it in front of her now, she couldn’t help but admit that it looked even better in person than the picture on the menu.

 

N’s half of the tray was a bit more filling than hers. A slice of perfectly browned toast topped with smooth avocado, and an egg gleaming golden over it, edges crisped just enough. His drink was tall, condensation running down the glass—some kind of iced coffee, pale from the cream swirling through it. It seemed fitting for him.

 

Uzi made her way back to their table, her steps a little quicker now, tray steady in her hands. Setting it down carefully, she slid into her seat with a faint sigh, brushing her bangs from her face.

 

N brightened as soon as she sat down, lifting his gaze from the table to her. “Hey,” he said as a small, easy smile spread across his expression, “What took you so long?”

 

She adjusted in her seat before glancing at him with a dry look. “The line was long.”

 

He tilted his head slightly, one brow quirking upward, amusement flickering in his eyes. “Didn’t you already have a receipt? You could’ve just gone straight up to the counter.”

 

Uzi leaned back a little in her chair, arms crossing as she huffed. “I did walk up to the counter. There were already a few drones standing there though… and I wasn’t about to tell them to move.” Her tone was a tad bit defensive, like she already knew how ridiculous it sounded.

 

N blinked, then let out a quiet, amused laugh, “You could’ve just said ‘excuse me.’ That usually works, you know.”

 

Rolling her eyes, Uzi muttered, “Yeah, but then what if one of them looked at me funny? Not worth the risk,” she sighed, “It’s not like it’s easy for me to talk to random drones like it is for you,” Her gaze flicked sideways at him, direct but not angry—more like she was daring him to argue.

 

He tilted his head, a daring grin tugging at his mouth. “I did offer to grab the food for us.”

 

Uzi scoffed, dragging her fingers through her bangs with a dramatic flick. “Yeah, yeah, I know.” Her tone was knowing and sharp, but she wasn’t upset—it was more like she was covering for the fact that, annoyingly, he was right.

 

And it didn’t help that she’d already teased him earlier about being so polite, and he’d taken it all sheepish, like she’d genuinely hurt his feelings. Guilt stirred ever so slightly in her chest, even if he seemed to have brushed it off by now. She should start thinking before she spoke…

 

Before she could dwell on that thought any further, N leaned forward. His eyes were bright with curiosity. “So… what did you end up getting?”

 

Caught off guard, Uzi blinked at him, her brain stuttering for a second. “Huh?”

 

N tilted his head again, brows quirking slightly.

 


“Oh. Uh—” She cleared her throat, pointing at her plate. “Just a crêpe. And… that espresso.” Her voice trailed a little at the end, like she was trying to sound casual about it but felt vaguely self-conscious.

 

To distract herself, she reached for the plate and picked it up of the tray, sliding it toward her. Then she carefully lifted the little white espresso cup, the cat design in the foam eyeing her almost mockingly. At least it gave her something to focus on that wasn’t N’s expression.

 

N must’ve took this as a cue to grab his plate, the scrape of ceramic against the tray faint as he picked it up and set it neatly in front of him. After placing down his plate, he pulled his iced coffee toward himself and took a small sip through the straw, his eyes drifting toward Uzi’s tiny espresso cup. His brows lifted slightly, inquisitiveness flashing across his face.

 

“…Is that a cat?” he asked, tilting his cup slightly to gesture at it.

 

Uzi’s gaze immediately darted down, almost like she’d been caught doing something embarrassing. Sure enough, the little foam design of the cat still stared back at her, smug and cute.

 

She quickly looked away, folding her arms tight across her chest as if to shield herself. “Yeah. So what?

 

N laughed softly under his breath, his shoulders shaking just a little. “Nothing. It’s just… kinda cute, that’s all.” His eyes flicked up to meet hers, fond and amused. “I didn’t know you liked coffee, though. I thought you were more of an energy drink type, right?”

 

That made her pause. She turned her gaze to him, narrowing her eyes. He had to have picked that up from some throwaway comment she’d made before—but she couldn’t remember when she’d ever said it out loud. The fact that he remembered something so small sent a strange, warm fuzziness pooling in her chest. It was the same every time he pulled that on her—remembering details no one else would bother to. And as much as she hated to admit it, it always left her a little off balance—but oddly, not in a bad way.

 

Trying not to let that show, Uzi leaned back in her chair, her voice clipped, matter-of-fact. “I don’t like coffee. I just… thought it looked good. Or cute, or whatever.” She waved her free hand dismissively, as though the cat design wasn’t the whole reason she ordered it.

 

Still, she could feel her face heat just slightly, and she kept her gaze fixed on the cup instead of N’s expression, refusing to give away how flustered she really felt.

 

N’s laugh was soft, barely more than a chuckle, but there was a warmth in it that carried into his words. “You’re adorable.”

 

The words hit Uzi like a wrench to the head. Her eyes flew wide, and before she could stop herself, she jerked her gaze away, heat creeping up her neck. “N–No, I’m not,” she blurted, the denial automatic. She could already feel the blush spreading across her cheeks, burning hot beneath her plating. A beat later, she groaned under her breath, exasperated, and snapped, “Ugh—stop saying stuff like that.”

 

Then, out of the corner of her eye, she caught it—the way his smile faltered, his expression dimming as though he’d overstepped. His voice was careful when he spoke again, concerned in contrast to before. “…Does it bother you? When I say things like that?”

 

Her folded arms loosened her façade defeated. She blinked, words sticking in her throat. “…No,” she admitted at last, shifting uncomfortably. “It’s just… I don’t know.”

 

N’s gaze flicked toward her, searching. His tone was gentle, earnest. “If it makes you uncomfortable, I’ll stop—”

 

He barely got the words out before Uzi whipped her head back toward him, hands waving frantically. “No! You don’t have to stop,” she said quickly, almost too quickly.

 

Now he looked thrown off, brows knitting together in confusion. And, honestly, who could blame him? She was practically speaking in contradictions, and she knew it.

 

The weight of that realization made her glance down at her plate as if her crêpe had suddenly become the most fascinating thing in the universe.

 

Uzi didn’t look back up when she spoke again. Her voice dropped, quieter this time, almost hesitant. “…It’s just… weird, okay? No one’s ever… said stuff like that to me before.”

 

The admission hung between them, raw and a little vulnerable. Even though she kept her eyes fixed on the food in front of her, she could feel her chest tightening with the truth of it.

 

N tilted his head slightly, the confusion plain in his eyes. “That doesn’t make sense,” he said simply.

 

Uzi looked back up at him and blinked, caught off guard. “Huh?”

 

“I mean…” His brows furrowed, his tone soft but earnest. “I don’t get why no one else would say things like that to you. It’s… honestly the only thing I think when I look at you.”

 

Her breath hitched, expression faltering as his words sank in. For a second, she just stared at him, circuits buzzing with static, her whole system practically short-circuiting under the weight of what he’d just said.

 

She had no clue how to process it, let alone respond. Her chest felt constrained, her face impossibly warm, and the silence stretching between them only made it worse. 

 

So, she defaulted to instinct. With a swift, sharp movement under the table, she kicked him in the shin. “You’re so annoying,” she muttered, scowling to mask her fluster.

 

N jerked slightly at the impact. “Ow–” he said, not dramatically or anything, more like surprised. Then, he glanced back at her with a small, knowing smile tugging at his lips. “You’re kinda proving my point.” 

 

Her glare sharpened, cheeks still burning. “Just… s–shut up and eat,” she snapped, trying desperately to reclaim some control over her voice.

 

But N only smiled wider, content and unbothered, before leaning back in his chair and taking another calm sip of his iced coffee.

 

For the next minute, the two of them focused on their food, the earlier tension settling into something softer. A comfortable quiet lingered at their little table, broken only by the quiet clinks of silverware against ceramic.

 

And though Uzi kept her eyes on her plate, her thoughts were tangled. They kept replaying his words over and over, no matter how hard she tried to shove them down.

 

She forced herself to glance at him after a long moment. She saw N let the straw of his drink linger between his fingers before taking another quiet sip of the iced coffee, the faint rattle of melting ice cubes filling the silence. He lowered the cup back to the table, tilting his head toward Uzi with that easy-going expression of his, “So, what do you wanna do right after this?”

 

Uzi hardly needed a second to think. “We could just head straight for the subway,” she said, her voice quick and decisive.

 

The warmth in N’s expression deepened, his lips curving into a genuine grin that made her chest feel a little too tight. “That sounds great,” he replied softly.

 

For a brief beat, quiet stretched between them. Then N leaned forward slightly, curiosity glinting in his eyes. “But… where’s the train actually gonna take us?”

 

That made Uzi hesitate. How had she not thought about that… 

 

She lifted a hand and lightly scratched the edge of her cheek, her gaze flicking away as though the answer might be written somewhere on the floor. “I don’t know yet. Not too far, I guess. Just… wherever.” Her tone faltered, then steadied again. “It’ll be fine as long as we stick together, right?”

 

N’s head dipped in a slow nod, the sincerity in his eyes leaving no room for doubt. “Yeah. Definitely.”

 

Her shoulders eased a fraction at that, a sparse comfort warming through her chest.

 

Then, with the same casual cheer that always seemed to slip past her guard, N added, “Maybe wherever we end up, we can look around at the little shops there.”

 

The suggestion pulled a faint smile from Uzi before she could stop it. The image of walking side by side with him—window shopping or lingering in some quiet corner—was strangely appealing.

 

She shifted in her seat, glancing at him with a mix of fondness and uncertainty. “That… actually sounds nice. But what would we even get?”

 

Even as she asked, her voice carried a hint of amusement, as though she already knew the answer didn’t matter. The thought of it was enough.

 

N leaned back in his chair, gaze tilting toward the sky as though the answer might drift down from above. His brows furrowed in concentration, the straw of his drink rolling absently between his fingers.

 

For a moment, he looked genuinely deep in thought—then, as if struck by sudden inspiration, his eyes lit up.

 

He turned back to her with a grin so wide and unguarded it was almost boyish, pure delight flickering across his features. “We could get something matching,” he said beaming, words tumbling out quick with enthusiasm. “Like… bracelets, or sunglasses, or—something else, y’know?”

 

The sheer joy in his voice was disarming, the kind of excitement that felt impossible to fake. Uzi felt a warmth rise unbidden in her chest, a strange flutter pressing behind her ribs. Even so, instinctively her face formed into a flat, unimpressed look. She half-scoffed half-laughed incredulously, “You’re so cheesy.” 

 

When the words left her, his brightness softened into something smaller, sheepish—like he’d suddenly realized how silly and cliche he sounded.

 

He glanced down at his cup and gave a faint, almost self-conscious laugh, his smile dimming though not vanishing completely. “Right… never mind then. Guess that was dumb.”

 

Something in his tone pulled at her. If it was anyone else, it may have come off as passive aggressive. But, N’s voice wasn’t exactly upset; there was a notable flicker of disappointment that left her feeling unexpectedly guilty.

 

A smirk tugged at the corner of her lips despite herself. She leaned back, crossing her arms, and muttered, “I never said no.”

 

Before he could react, she swung her leg forward under the table and nudged her boot against his shin. It was far gentler than the last sharp kick she’d given him, almost playful.

 

N blinked at her in surprise before a soft snicker slipped out of him. He nudged her back gingerly, the end of his shoe tapping against the end of hers. “Hey—quit it,” a light, fond laugh edged his words.

 

One of Uzi’s brows arched, her smirk sharpening. The way she looked at him carried a clear challenge, her eyes narrowing just slightly as if daring him to repeat that. Inside, her thoughts spun—this strange mix of warmth and restlessness, a pulse of energy that made her want to keep pushing, just to see how far he’d let her go.

 

Uzi drew her foot back, ready to jab him again, but the shift in his expression made her pause.

 

N’s eyes flickered with a sudden thought, his mouth parting slightly to let in a soft intake of breath, followed by an “Oh–“ like he had just remembered something.

 

He hesitated, then leaned forward a little, as if whatever he was about to say mattered more than their playful sparring.

 

“Hey, can I… ask you something?” His tone carried a cautious weight, enough that Uzi unintentionally dropped the half-smirk tugging at her lips.

 

She turned her gaze to her espresso, debating whether it was appropriate to take a sip now or not. “Sure,” she said, her tone mostly unbothered.

 

N nodded once, his gaze steady, “I know this is kinda random to bring up, but it’s just… I’ve told you a lot about me, but I don’t really know much about you.” His voice wavered for the briefest second before he steadied it again. “I want to get to know you better. I really do.”

 

The sincerity in his words landed heavier than Uzi expected. For a moment, it felt like something turned low in her chest, leaving her almost restless in her seat. Her hands fidgeted with the hem of her jacket sleeve before she caught herself and forced them still.

 

Her eyes narrowed slightly, her tone edged with curiosity more than anything else. She wasn’t sure what else to say other than, “...What do you want to know?”

 

N’s brow furrowed as he thought, and he stopped casually stirring his straw around in his drink. His voice, when it came, was careful but curious. “I mean… your family, for starters. You’ve mentioned you don’t have siblings, but that’s about all I know.” He glanced at her as if checking to see if he was already pushing too far, then added more gently, “And… what was it like for you growing up?”

 

The playful air that had lingered between them seemed to thin out, leaving Uzi quieter, her shoulders relaxing back into her chair as she processed his question. She wasn’t upset—just caught a little off guard.

 

N noticed almost immediately. His brow knit together, the faintest crease of concern settling across his features. “Hey, we don’t have to talk about this if you don’t want to,” he said quickly, almost stumbling over the words. “We could just talk about—” *

 

“No,” Uzi cut in, her voice uncharacteristically soft as she leaned forward slightly. She placed her elbows on the table, resting her chin against the back of her hands, “It’s fine. I’m fine with talking about it.”

 

She tried not to acknowledge much the way his asking stirred something a bit ardent inside her. No one ever really bothered to dig into who she was beyond the surface. It felt… different, being asked. Nice, even. Almost like she mattered. 

 

N studied her for a moment, then simply nodded, as if he understood without needing her to spell it out. His quiet patience made it easier for her to think.

 

Uzi hesitated, she shifted back in her seat again, before drumming her fingers lightly against her sleeve while deciding where to start. Finally, she spoke. “I think I’ve told you a little about my dad before. He runs that dumb door business.”

 

N’s face brightened with recognition, and he nodded. “Yeah, you’ve mentioned it a couple times. Didn’t you have to move around a lot because of it?”

 

“Pretty much my whole life,” Uzi admitted, a short huff of air escaping her as though the thought itself was tiring. “Until recently, I was always packing up and going somewhere new. I think I’ve lived in… six different houses, maybe? Not even counting the apartments when I was little.”

 

N’s expression turned to something delicate, eyes full of care. He leaned his chin into his hand, watching her with genuine empathy. “That must’ve been stressful.”

 

Uzi’s mouth pulled into a thin, tight line. Not out of annoyance at him—just at the blunt sting of truth in his words.

 

It did suck. More than he could probably understand.

 

Before she could decide how much more to say, N tilted his head, his tone careful. “Wait—you lived in apartments?” He wasn’t saying it like it was a bad thing, more so he was simply curious.

 

She nodded, brushing a stray strand of her bangs back behind her ear. “Yeah. My parents couldn’t afford a house when I was young. My dad’s business didn’t start picking up until I was about five.” Her voice dropped, more raw than she meant it to. “…Honestly? Sometimes I wish it hadn’t.”

 

N blinked, a bit startled by the confession. His head tilted again, brow raised with quiet inquiry. “Why would you say that?”

 

Uzi’s eyes shifted away, landing on the corner of the table as something somber tugged at her chest. “Because sometimes it feels like he cares more about his stupid doors than me.” The words slipped out harsher than she intended, but she didn’t take them back. 

 

She caught N opening his mouth, his expression softening like he was about to offer comfort, but she cut the moment short.

 

Straightening her posture, she smoothed her expression back into neutrality, drawing in a silent breath. She turned her gaze back toward him, trying to make it sound like it didn’t matter.

 

“It’s whatever,” she said dismissively with a shrug. “I’m used to it by now. House after house, it’s just been me and him. We… tolerate each other, I guess.”

 

Even as she said it, a faint heaviness lingered in her chest. The word tolerate wasn’t really the whole truth, but it was easier than admitting what it actually felt like. Easier to pretend it didn’t hurt as much as it did. 

 

N looked uneasy, expression thoughtful as he searched for the right words. Finally, with a hesitant edge to his tone, he asked, “So… you and your dad don’t really get along, then?”

 

Uzi gave a small shake of her head, her voice flat but edged with something quieter beneath. “Not really. He barely even acknowledges me, and when he does, it’s just to stick his nose in my business.” She exhaled, a sigh slipping out as she tried to sound dismissive. “I don’t care that much, though. At least I’m left alone most of the time.”

 

It wasn’t the truth—not fully. She did care. She had always cared. But those feelings had been buried deep a long time ago, pressed down so far that now all she could do was pretend they didn’t matter. Pretend that the sting of being overlooked, of never being enough, hadn’t shaped her as much as it did.

 

When she looked back at N, though, her practiced indifference faltered. His eyes met hers with an open attentiveness, soft and steady, like he wasn’t just listening—he was feeling alongside her. That kind of empathy was disarming, foreign even, and yet… it made something stir faintly in her chest. Something she couldn’t quite name.

 

The silence between them stretched for a moment, heavy but not uncomfortable.

 

Then N spoke again, his voice gentle. “So… where’s your mom in all this? Are your parents divorced?”

Notes:

Who’s gonna tell him?

😭🙏 HELP anyways

I actually went back through like,,, every mention of Uzi’s mom I could find, cuz I was worried that she had already told N. I used that little word-search filter thing (cuz I use the notes app to store my fics… lol) and I probably searched for like, 15 minutes, but found nothing. So *really* hope I didn’t somehow miss that 🥲

I’m surprised that even 90+ chapters into this, Uzi hasn’t told N abt her mom until now 😭🤚 like jeez

I think I should’ve focused on Uzi talking abt her back story more, but like I think I focused so much on building/establishing the other characters stories that I never made Uzi talk to anyone abt it out loud. This *is* my first fic though, now that I think abt it- so in anything I write in the future, I’ll probably keep that much more in mind

And icl, the only reason I’m even bringing this up too is cuz a while ago, someone commented that pointing it out how we know sm abt N’s story and shit, but we know only a few things abt Uzi. Or well, maybe a lot of things, but not really as in depth as N. Like, I unintentionally focused on her current mindset and thoughts that I barely talked abt her past, other than like her previous friendship with Thad and stuff, but that’s literally it- oh, and the like, 3 mentions of her mother in her thoughts throughout all 90 fucking chapters 😭 bruv

ANYWAYS I was gonna make this chapter longer, but I didn’t really have time to. Like, I wanted to post this for yall instead of making yall wait sm longer js to make the chapter longer. Though, instead, there will be more dialogue in the next chapter and I think it helps a bit with the pacing to, cuz I might as well tell yall- pretty much what’s gonna happen is there gonna talk for a bit longer abt wtv, and then leave to go to the subway. I think that’s predictable enough for that not to be considered a spoiler.

Hope this part doesn’t seem too drawn out either. I think it’s important though, and I love writing the cute little moments between them 😖

and OMG wouldn’t this be considered like… they’re first official-unofficial date?!?!??!?! If u really think abt it

In other news… GUYS I seriously need y’all’s help on something…

Might be kinda random but HEAR ME OUT. So, I’m gonna assume that a bunch of yall are tadc fans cuz like… if you like murder drones and other work from glitch productions, chances are you’ve at least HEARD or watched an episode of it. STAY WITH ME I HAVE A POINT- I’ve been itching to write a fic abt it. Mostly because episode 6 kinda… broke my heart 😭😭 and I wanna feel better. Not gonna explain cuz spoilers, but iykyk. And very unfortunately… I happen to be a funnybunny shipper 🙂‍↕️ it’s like a curse istg. Honestly though, it’s more like I like the idea of it rather than it actually being in the show, cuz I feel like if it was cannon I wouldn’t like it that much. Idk if that’s a controversial opinion or not but idgaf 😛

OKAY SORRY SORRY IM GETTING DISTRACTED basically my point is, I REALLY wanna write a fic, but I literally can’t think of shit for an idea, like I’m actually stumped 😵‍💫 I think I’m shit at coming up with just cannon divergence fics cuz I usually like completely different AU (like, as you may have noticed, specifically high school/college AU’s and apocalypse AU’s) but I wanna make something that’s js cannon divergent. It’d follow the events right after episode 6 (I’m gonna cry js thinking abt it) and be something funnybunny related… and unfortunately would probably have a lot of angst BUT will have nicer moments… but I’d have to pace it well so it’d be a while before that 🥲 also would probably have really long chapters too

BUT UGHHH I can’t think of a premise. If anyone has any ideas/suggestions and I end up liking one, I’ll totally 100% write it. And I promise it’s not gonna be a 50+ chapter fic like this one 🤧

Also icl, I really REALLY wanna write the dialogue between characters. Like I think it’d be so fucking fun to write how they all talk, especially Kinger (I love Kinger you don’t understand…) and Caine to (he’s so silly I love how he talks)

Thanks for reading about my current dilemma, I hope at least one person has a suggestion 😭🙏 I’ve been thinking abt this for days, I kid u not

OH one more thing, in actual important relevant news- I’m making a lot of progress on the dc server (that I’ve been talking abt for months…… bruh 🤧) cuz I FINALLY got the shit with my account verification figured out. All I have to do now is pretty much js the aesthetics of it, with all the fancy fonts and stuff. I made a bot for it too, and I’m slowly but surely figuring out how to code it or wtv tf 😵‍💫 it’s been like 2 years since I’ve used dc, cut me some slack 😒 /silly

OKAY that’s everything. Next chapter will be posted on Monday, BYEEEEE

Chapter 95: Togetherness

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The question lingered, carrying more weight than he probably realized.

 

Uzi’s expression faltered, the faint edge of sharpness she usually carried slipping away. A weight pressed into her chest, heavy and inevitable. She hated this part—hated the way it always made the air turn cold, how it always left her bracing for someone else’s awkwardness.

 

She drew in a small, steadying breath and let her eyes drift aside for a moment, as though gathering the courage to say it aloud. When she looked back at N, her voice was hesitant, softer than usual. “Oh–um–…actually, my mom’s dead.”

 

As soon as she said this, N’s easy-going demeanor faltered entirely. His face went rigid, eyes widening as though the floor crumbled beneath him. The warmth in his expression drained, replaced by a look of startled panic, like he was scrambling inside for the right words.

 

Uzi knew that look well—it was the same one she always saw when she told someone.

 

A beat later they’d mutter, I’m so sorry, like they were confessing to a crime; either that, or they’d stumble to change the subject, dripping with pity she didn’t want. 

 

Before he could even open his mouth, she shook her head quickly, cutting him off with a small wave of her hand. “Don’t. It’s fine. It happened when I was little, and… I’ve already processed it. I can talk about it.”

 

The words she’d given him weren’t a lie—but they weren’t the whole truth either. Uzi kept that to herself. It was easier that way.

 

Yes, it had happened when she was ‘young’, but middle school wasn’t so long ago that the memories blurred at the edges.

 

She remembered everything . The hollow sound of her dad’s voice when he first said there was an accident. The way she’d cried herself sick but forced herself to believe him. And then, years later, the shattering second blow—when he admitted it wasn’t an accident at all, but murder. He’d lied to her face, thinking it would shield her. As if wrapping pain in lies somehow made it less suffocating. 

 

It hadn’t. If anything, it carved the wound deeper, left her carrying not just grief but betrayal. Even now, it lingered in the back of her mind like a shadow that wouldn’t leave. She could still feel how devastatingly the truth had gutted her.

 

She wasn’t ready to lay all that bare. Not now, not to N. But still… the fact that she was even talking about her mom with him at all— willingly —that was rare for her.  

 

Usually, she avoided the subject unless she was cornered into it. Yet with N, there wasn’t that pressure. There wasn’t judgment or pity. Just… him. And the strange, undeniable comfort that came with it. She hadn’t expected that.

 

A brief silence lingered between them before N finally found his voice. He shifted a little, his words faltering at first, his tone uncertain, almost fragile. “Oh—so… you’re really… okay with talking about it?”

 

His stammer wasn’t annoying. It wasn’t the bumbling kind of awkward she’d usually roll her eyes at. Instead, it sounded careful—like he didn’t want to step anywhere that might break her open.

 

Uzi blinked, feeling a small tug in her chest.

 

He wasn’t pitying her. He wasn’t recoiling.

 

He was… genuinely asking.

 

And she wasn’t sure why that made her feel both strangely exposed and oddly safe all at once.

 

Uzi’s eyes flickered down for a moment before she gave a small shrug, her voice quiet. “Yeah… I’m fine with it.” Her hand drifted up to the back of her neck, fingers brushing against metal in a nervous habit. “Honestly, I thought I’d already told you before… guess not.” She forced a thin, crooked smile, as if that alone might smooth away the heaviness of what she’d said.

 

But when she lifted her gaze back to him, her smile faltered.

 

Her eyes locked with his—really locked. And the silence that followed wasn’t awkward. It was heavy in a different way, as though every unspoken thing hung in the space between them.

 

N’s lips parted slightly, then pressed together again as if he were weighing his next words. His expression softened into something deeply sincere. “Thank you… for confiding in me with that,” he said, his voice low and deliberate. “I know how hard that must be.”

 

The genuine weight in his tone tugged at something inside her. Uzi ducked her head a little, fighting back the instinct to deflect with sarcasm, and instead allowed a small, sheepish smile to creep onto her face. There was a pause, her chest taut with hesitation, before she finally pushed the words out. “I… trust you. A lot, actually.”

 

The shift in N’s expression nearly undid her. His eyes widened, shimmering with warmth, and his mouth curved into a smile that wasn’t his usual goofy or self-conscious grin, but something gentler, purer. The kind of sheer joy that looked like it hurt to hold in. It was as though her words meant the world to him, and seeing that hit her harder than she expected.

 

Uzi felt her thoughts buzz with the sudden weight of it all—how vulnerable that admission was, how dangerous it felt to be that open—but at the same time, she couldn’t bring herself to regret it. Not when N was looking at her like that. 

 

Uzi gave a quick shake of her head, her voice cutting into the quiet before it had a chance to get heavier. “Anyway—uh, where was I again? Before all that?”

 

N tilted his head, his brow furrowing slightly as he thought it over. After a moment, he nodded slowly. “I think… you were talking about moving around a lot. That you never really stayed in one place growing up.”

 

“Right,” Uzi responded with a brisk nod, “Yeah. That.” She leaned back slightly, her tone softening as she went on. “I only really settled down recently. About a year ago—when my dad and I moved here. This is the first year I’ve gone to this school, actually.”

 

N’s expression brightened at that, his eyes flickering with recognition. “Yeah—I remember you mentioned that when we first met.”

 

Her head tilted sharply, one brow arched in disbelief. “Wait, seriously? You remember that?” She gave him a skeptical look, folding her arms across her chest. “I barely even remember first meeting you.” 

 

N let out a shy laugh, his hand rising to rub at the back of his neck. “I just remember things like that, I guess.” His voice was almost apologetic, as though it were a flaw instead of a strength.

 

Uzi blinked at him, then scoffed in amusement and muttered under her breath, “Yeah, I’ve noticed…” She didn’t mean it in a rude way—more so she had just spoke before thinking.

 

When she turned her gaze to him again, N was watching her, his face caught somewhere between confusion and nervousness, like he wasn’t sure how to take what she’d said.

 

The slight unease in his eyes made her heart twist just tad. She gave him a small, reassuring smile—subtle, but enough to soften the moment. When she did, his expression shifted, and she saw a flicker of understanding and quiet relief cross his face.

 

Uzi leaned back a little, fiddling with one of the rings on her fingers as she let the words spill, not giving herself too much time to overthink them. “Anyways… I’ve never really had many friends. I usually just stick to myself. Not because I wanted to, really—more because it never lasted. We’d always end up moving, and… it’s hard to keep up with anyone like that.” Her tone was even, but it carried that edge of something buried deeper.

 

Then, her gaze dropped briefly to the ground, “I kind of had friends when I was younger, but… that stopped after a while.” She hesitated, her expression flickering with something nostalgic. “But then there was Thad. Back in middle school. For a little bit.”

 

Her eyes unfocused as the memory pressed in, and she shook her head slightly, as though she couldn’t believe it herself. “Honestly, I was shocked I let myself get that close to him. Usually I’d push drones away before it ever got that far. But… I thought maybe it’d be different that time. My dad told me we weren’t going to move again, so… I believed him.” The words slowed, dragged down under their own weight. Uzi’s voice lowered, almost flat now. “But then my mom died. And my dad—he couldn’t stand being in that house anymore. So we left.”

 

She pressed her lips into a thin line, forcing her face into something unreadable, and turned her eyes away from N, unwilling to let him see too much.

 

There was a pause, and when N finally spoke, it was hesitant, his voice carrying a new thread of concern that hadn’t been there before. “Do you… think you’ll ever move again?”

 

Uzi’s face flattened, her tone sharp but not aimed at N—more at the sheer absurdity of the thought. “I sure hope not. If my dad tries to pull that shit again, I’ll just get emancipated. I don’t even care anymore.” A scowl tugged across her features, laced with both irritation and utter disgust, the words leaving her mouth like something bitter. She folds her arms after a moment, as if to shield herself.

 

N blinked, brow arching, his voice tinged with surprise. “Wait… you’re not eighteen already?”

 

She shook her head, letting out a breath that sounded half annoyed, half tired. “No. My birthday’s next year—towards the end of the next school semester. So if my dad decides to move before then, or even halfway through the year, I’m not going with him. I’m done. I can’t—” She faltered, her arms tightening around herself, the edge in her voice giving way to unease. “I don’t want to do that again.”

 

Her gaze wavered, dropping off to the side. Just the thought of another forced uprooting made her stomach twist, dragging back every old fracture she’d worked hard to keep sealed.

 

N’s expression softened, like he understood at least some part of what that meant for her. But then his brows drew together in thought. “But… don’t you have to have a job to get emancipated? And… a place to stay?”

 

Uzi rolled a shoulder in a shrug, her mouth twitching like she didn’t want to admit she hadn’t thought that far ahead. “Something like that.”

 

N tilted his head, his voice careful but curious. “Then… what would you do? I mean, correct me if I’m wrong, but… you don’t really have anywhere to go, right?”

 

Uzi hesitated, the silence stretching while she turned it over in her head. Strangely, it hit her that she’d never really let herself think about it too deeply. Her eyes flickered, uncertain, and she gave a short blink before answering. “I… dunno. I’d probably figure it out. Maybe stay at a friend’s place or something.” Her tone carried a thin veneer of confidence, but even she could hear how flimsy it sounded.

 

N tilted his head, concern shadowing his features. “But… what if you didn’t have a friend’s house to go to?”

 

The question snagged her, halting her mid-thought. Uzi’s mouth opened, then closed again, her mind scrambling for an answer that wasn’t there. She ended up speaking as the words formed in real time. “Then… I guess I’d just… stay outside. On the streets, maybe, until I figured something out.” She gave a stiff shrug, though her voice wavered as the reality of that sank in. Her arms folded tighter around her torso, as if bracing herself. “…I just… really hope that doesn’t happen .” A sigh slipped out of her, quieter, and her eyes darted away. “I don’t even wanna think about it.”

 

N’s gaze softened, his expression warmed with quiet sympathy. He leaned slightly closer, his voice gentle. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to push you with that.”

 

Uzi shook her head quickly, her hair falling in front of her face. “No, no—don’t apologize. I should be thinking about that.” She brushed her bangs out of her face, before she forced herself to look back at him. A small, faintly grateful frown crossed her lips. “If anything… you’re helping. Asking that.”

 

Her chest tightened at the admission, because it was true—he was pushing her in a way no one else had, but instead of feeling cornered, she felt… steadied. And that was new.

 

N gave a small nod, his voice quiet, almost thoughtful. “Yeah…”

 

Uzi let out a slow breath, slumping back a little as if the weight of everything she’d just admitted finally caught up to her. “Well…” she muttered, half to herself, “that’s pretty much all there is to me. Daddy issues and emotional baggage.” The words slipped out with a brittle laugh, sharp and awkward, like maybe if she made a joke of it, it wouldn’t sting so badly.

 

N’s expression shifted instantly—no hint of mockery, only a deep, steady concern. “Don’t say that about yourself,” he said softly, almost with a kind of quiet firmness that surprised her. His tone wasn’t scolding, but it carried a conviction that made her pause.

 

She raised an eyebrow at him, not as a challenge, but in silent expectation, hoping he’d elaborate.

 

N seemed to understand the unspoken message. His words came slowly, careful, like he wanted her to believe every syllable. “You’re not… baggage, Uzi. Not to me. I don’t feel dragged down when I’m around you.” He leaned in just a little, making sure her eyes didn’t waver from his. “I love being around you. Even right now—I’m just… glad you trust me enough to share this at all.”

 

For a moment, silence hung between them. Then, N deliberately reached across the table, his movements tentative but steady, and placed his hand over hers.

 

Uzi’s gaze snapped down at their joined hands, her breath catching before she forced herself to look back up at him. Her chest felt like it was caught between fluttering warmth and something too big to name.

 

That’s when he added, almost with a quiet certainty, “I like you for you . Every part. Even the flaws you think you have.”

 

Uzi felt her heart stutter at that. The words sank in too deeply, threatening to unravel her in ways she hadn’t braced for.

 

She was frozen, words refusing to come to her. What could she possibly say to something like that?! The weight of his honesty pressed against her chest, and it almost hurt how much it meant.

 

Her throat tightened, and for a terrifying moment she thought she might actually cry. No—absolutely not. She was not going to fall apart here, not when she was literally in public, and definitely not in front of N… right now. 

 

Her eyes stung as she forced herself to look away, turning her focus downward to their plates. The food was nearly gone, nothing left but scraps. She blinked hard a few times, trying to chase away the sting, trying to keep herself composed. When she finally glanced back at him, it was quick—just enough to acknowledge him, but she couldn’t bring herself to hold his gaze.

 

“…We should probably head out,” she said, her voice quieter than before, a little uneven at the edges.

 

She wasn’t sure what went through his mind in that moment, but from the way his eyes lingered on her, hesitant and searching, he seemed to catch on that she didn’t want to press this any further. After a beat, he gave a small nod, his voice gentle. “Alright.”

 

The warmth of his hand still lingered on hers when she pulled away. She slid out of her chair, standing quickly as if movement alone could ground her, and her gaze fell back to the table.

 

“Uh…” she muttered, pointing vaguely at their plates, “are we supposed to take this back inside? Or does someone clean it up?”

 

Her words were almost too casual, a weak attempt to fill the air with something safer, something less vulnerable. She didn’t dare look back at him yet, worried he’d see too much written across her face.

 

She could feel his gaze still resting on her, steady and hesitant. “We should probably take it inside,” he murmured at last, voice unsure, as if testing the ground beneath his words.

 

Uzi busied herself with the dishes, moving her cup onto the tray and stacking her plate. N mirrored her movements for his own, quiet, deliberate.

 

For a moment she debated on whether she should just grab the tray herself, but before she could decide, N’s voice cut through the silence—careful, almost sheepish. “…Do you mind if I take it back?”

 

She blinked at him, caught off guard. His tone wasn’t the usual polite offer—it was hesitant, like he wasn’t sure if he was even allowed to ask.

 

Then it hit her. Right. Earlier she’d essentially snapped at him about not needing to be ‘so polite’. He must’ve taken that to heart, and now he was second-guessing himself around her. Guilt pricked at her chest. Fantastic. She’d probably made him feel self-conscious without even meaning to. 

 

“…Yeah, that’s fine,” she said with a quick nod, maybe too quick. His expression eased, just a fraction, but she didn’t leave it there.

 

“You don’t have to, like… ask my permission, though.” She added it with a shrug, trying to smooth over the weirdness. The words sat heavy on her tongue, and for a moment she almost left it at that—but the look on his face tugged at her.

 

After a short pause, she forced herself to tack on, as casually as she could manage, “And… it’s okay if you wanna be polite, y’know. Sorry if I made that sound like a bad thing earlier.”

 

The apology burned in her throat—humiliating, almost—but she tossed it out as if it were no big deal, acting like it didn’t matter at all. Her tone was light, detached, like she wasn’t already overthinking every syllable. Inside, though, she felt the weight of it, the nagging urge to make sure he understood she hadn’t meant to shut him down.

 

N gave a small shake of his head, his voice soft. “It’s alright. You don’t need to apologize. I wasn’t… upset.”

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes just slightly, studying him. He wasn’t lying—his tone was steady enough—but she knew him well enough now to catch the little undercurrent. Maybe he hadn’t been upset , but it had gotten to him. She could tell by the way he shifted his weight, like he didn’t want her to notice. 

 

He reached for the tray, his movements careful, and lifted it from the table. Without another word, he turned toward the café’s door, ready to carry it inside. He’d barely taken a step when Uzi’s mouth moved before her brain could stop her.

 

“N.”

 

He paused immediately, glancing back at her. “Yeah?”

 

Her processors hummed too loud in her own head. What was she doing? She almost backed out right then—but instead, she found herself closing the space between them, her face warming fast. On impulse, she stood onto her tip-toes, just enough to reach him, and pressed the lightest kiss against his cheek.

 

In an instant, his whole expression jolted, eyes wide, face flushing a shade she didn’t even know he could turn. Uzi’s own systems buzzed hot with embarrassment—yep, she was definitely blushing too.

 

“Thanks,” she murmured, her voice lower than usual, awkward but sincere. “For… what you said earlier. It means a lot.”

 

When she looked up at him again, she could practically see his short-circuiting. He just stood there, frozen, tray in hand, like his brain had stopped keeping up with reality.

 

After what felt like forever, he managed to stammer out, “I—uh—I’m gonna… bring this tray inside now.” He lifted it slightly, as if to prove that’s what he was holding.

 

Uzi almost laughed—he wasn’t brushing her off, she could tell. His grin gave him away, wide and unrestrained, so genuine it looked like he couldn’t stop it even if he tried. And somehow, that only made her face feel warmer.

 

As they made their way to the café doors, neither seemed able to keep their eyes entirely forward. Every few steps, Uzi caught herself stealing quick glances at N—and every time, she realized he was doing the same. It was ridiculous, and awkward, and… she couldn’t help it. For once, she actually let herself smile without trying to suppress it. It felt strange on her face, foreign almost, but she was in too good of a mood to care.

 

When they reached the door, she stepped ahead just enough to pull it open, holding it there for him. The small gesture wasn’t much, but N’s surprised, appreciative look almost made her feel a bit sheepish . She averted her gaze away, scanning the café interior until her eyes landed on a small station tucked off to the side—trash bins beneath a counter stacked with empty trays.

 

“There,” she said, pointing with a flick of her finger. “That’s probably where this stuff goes.”

 

N followed her line of sight and gave a quick nod. Together they walked over, and N set down their tray and plates in the seemingly designated area. Once his was in place, N turned on his heel, brushing his hands together like the task needed some finality.

 

His gaze found her again almost immediately, his blush still lingering like it hadn’t even begun to fade. “So…” he started, his tone hesitant but fond, “should we head to the subway now?”

 

At the word, Uzi felt her grin spring back almost instantly. The subway. She’d been waiting for this. All the nerves and somewhat awkwardness from before melted into a genuine spark of excitement. She gave a firm nod, her voice steady with enthusiasm. “Yeah. I can’t wait.”

 

N’s smile widened in return, as if her excitement alone fueled his own. Without another word, the two of them pushed back through the café doors and stepped outside, falling naturally into stride beside one another.

 

Now, they were officially on their way toward the New Ore City subway.

Notes:

Omfggg

Almost didn’t have this chapter ready on time, but I finally had the inspiration so I wrote pretty much all of it (except the beginning) in one sitting. I like how it turned out, but I feel like it could be better or longer

I thought the end was sooo sweet, like I js felt like something heartwarming like that fits so well there. Uzi and N are the cutest things ever, I love them sm 🥹🥹

I hope that was a good enough amount of Uzi’s backstory to not seem like a let down. Like, I didn’t want it to be a super quick conversation, but I also didn’t want to drag it out. This seems like a good enough middle ground, right?? 😭

I would have more to say, but I’m pretty tired rn so I’m js gonna go to sleep 😖

Next chapter should be posted next Monday. Sorry for the long wait- I gotta tell yall why 😈

I mentioned that I was gonna make a funnybunny fic in the last end notes, right?? WELL I started on that, and it’s SO GOOD IM TELLING YOUUU like I love writing the characters and how they look and their mannerisms sfm. And I had the best fucking idea thanks to MadamPirateOwl (if I spelled that wrong I’ll go fix that tomorrow, I don’t feel like looking rn 💔) cuz they said in the last chapters comment section why don’t I make them play clue?? So yeah, I’m doing that, and it’s so awesome so far. It’s gonna be very angsty though (no thanks to the shit that happened in episode 6, since it’s following right after that 😒) but it should get better… eventually. Still working out the details. It’ll be a slow burn though since I can’t physically write something without a slow burn part to it, but hopefully that work in its favor and make the pacing really good. RAHHH I’m so excited, I’m cooking with this I swear. I’m also trying to use *way* more descriptive writing, and I think I’ve improved a lot as a writer since I initially started this fic, so I think that’ll add a lot.

Oh if I didn’t explain that well enough, the reason I brought that up is cuz I really wanna work on it more. I’ve gotten like… a quarter(?) of the first chapter long, but like note what’s considered a quarter of that is longer than this chapter of this fic, so I’ve got a ways to go. I want to make the chapters super long cuz I don’t want the fic to be a million chapters, like this one 😃👍 Not that that’s a bad thing, it’ll js help me have more consistent posts… hopefully

When I post the first chapter I’ll probs write abt it in another end notes, if anyone’s interested in that.

Again, next chapter of this will be posted Monday. See yall then!

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

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EDIT: (9/8/2025): So was gonna post today, but I didn’t have the time to finish editing the chapter 🥲 I don’t wanna give yall something half-assed js to post now, so I’m js gonna wait till tomorrow. 100% though will be posting tomorrow, dw! It’s gonna be a kinda long chapter too, so I hope yall will like it! Sorry abt the wait 🤧

Chapter 96: i just want to hold her

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The two of them slipped into the steady stream of drones moving along the sidewalk, their steps falling into rhythm with the current of the crowd. The air buzzed with chatter and the hum of traffic, the scents of gasoline and cheap food ever present.

 

Uzi directed her attention beside her when N’s voice broke through the noise. “Hey, uh… you do know where the subway is, right…?” His tone was dubious, to say the least. 

 

The question hit square in the face. Uzi froze for half a second mid-step, her mind blanking.

 

She didn’t know. Why would she? She obviously hadn’t set foot in New Ore City before the trip!

 

She really should be straight up with N, tell him she has no idea… but the words came fumbling out before she could be think to do otherwise.

 

Uzi turned slightly toward him, forcing a tone that was meant to sound casual and self-assured. “Yeah! Totally—It’s… uh…” Her voice petered out, the confidence bleeding from her words almost immediately.

 

N glanced sideways at her, his brow quirking, waiting for her to finish.

 

No backing down now—she had to make it seem like she knew what she was talking about so that she wouldn’t seem stupid. 

 

“It should be up ahead,” she said quickly, forcing a shrug. “We just… have to walk a bit further—follow the crowd.”

 

Her lips pressed together as soon as the words left her mouth. She couldn’t help but feel guilty for the little lie.

 

Smooth. Real convincing, Uzi. 

 

N tilted his head, narrowing his eyes in that quiet, suspicious way of his. Not accusing, exactly, but like he was studying her too carefully.

 

Uzi flicked her gaze away, then darted it back, heat creeping into her face. Could he see straight through her bluff? Did he already catch onto the fact that she was utterly clueless!? 

 

But then, N’s expression changed completely—once more looking content, easy and unbothered, as he gave a small nod. “Alright,” he said with a cheerfulness that almost made her wince.

 

Then, with a little laugh, he added, “For a second there, I thought you had no idea where we were going.”

 

Uzi bit down on the inside of her cheek, silently cursing herself. Brilliant. She’d boxed herself in—pretended she had a clue when she really didn’t. Now, she couldn’t even do anything to solve the problem, like pull out her phone to look it up. Because then he’d know for sure she’d been bluffing. 

 

At least she hadn’t said anything specific, just ‘follow the crowd.’ Maybe the gamble would actually work out. It didn’t seem too unreasonable to think so.

 

She forced a short laugh, awkward and stiff, murmuring aloud to herself, “Yeah… me too.”

 

Her relief came when instead of prying further, N slid the conversation elsewhere. “So,” he said after a beat, “are you looking forward to the rooftop dinner tonight?”

 

Uzi blinked, her shoulders easing a fraction. Okay, so either he did notice her slip and decided to throw her a lifeline, or he genuinely believed her little act. Knowing him… it was probably the latter. 

 

She let out a quiet exhale, buying herself a moment. “Somewhat,” she admitted at last.

 

N raised his brow, curious, the corner of his mouth tugging like he wanted to tease her but thought better of it. “Somewhat?” he repeated. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

 

Uzi gave a little shrug, trying to play it off. “I mean, it sounds cool or whatever,” she admitted, “but… I just don’t really like heights.”

 

N’s expression shifted to immediate understanding, and he nodded along. “Yeah, I get that. Same here, actually. Heights are—” he shuddered slightly for emphasis, mouth tugging into a wry smile, “—terrifying.”

 

That earned him a quick glance from her, surprised but oddly relieved. At least he could relate.

 

He went quiet for a moment, brows pulling together in thought before he added, “Still, it probably won’t be too bad. I’ll be shocked if there isn’t some massive fence around the edges of the roof, or something like that.” 

 

Uzi let out a low hum, not entirely convinced. “Maybe,” she said, her arms crossing loosely as she kicked at a crack in the pavement. “But it’s the idea of being so high up that gets to me.”

 

“I can understand that,” N replied without hesitation, his tone simple but reassuring.

 

For a beat they walked in comfortable silence, the crowd pressing around them. Then N glanced down at her again, curiosity flickering in his eyes. “Do you think it’ll actually be as nice as the chaperones keep hyping it up to be?”

 

That pulled a sharp scoff from Uzi. “Please. I’ll be shocked if it is.” She gestured broadly with her hands, exasperation spilling through her words. “Just because it’s ‘sponsored’ by somebody’s rich parents—or whatever the hell that’s supposed to mean—doesn’t magically turn it into some kind of extravagant event.” 

 

Her brief rant drew out a small chuckle from N, quiet but genuine, his grin lighting up his face. “Fair enough,” he commented, but this time with an amused shake of his head, clearly entertained by her bluntness.

 

Uzi fought the urge to smile back too obviously, though inside she couldn’t help but feel a bit lighter—like maybe the rooftop thing wouldn’t be the end of the world if he was there.

 

N gave a little shrug, smiling at her in that easy, unguarded way of his. “Well, even if it turns out kinda lame or whatever,” he began, voice warm with sincerity, “at least I’ll get to be with you.”

 

The words hit Uzi harder than she’d ever admit. He voiced pretty much exactly what she had just been thinking—and that, combined with the fact he actually said that, made a burning sensation crawl up her neck almost instantly. She shot him a quick sideways look before forcing out a dismissive, “Yeah, whatever. Not a big deal or anything.” She crossed her arms tight over her chest, her gaze snapping away as if she could physically shield herself from how much that comment actually meant to her.

 

But she could feel him still looking at her—really looking. His gaze had weight to it, as though he could see straight through her flimsy wall of indifference, and that only made her pulse quicken. Uzi clenched her jaw, refusing to give him the satisfaction of watching her melt under his words. 

 

Her eyes darted around the street in desperate search of something, anything, to break the moment before he said something else that would completely short-circuit her.  

 

And then—thankfully—something did.

 

Her attention snagged on a green railing up ahead, wrapped around a wide open stairwell sinking down into the ground. The bold white block letters stamped on the black sign beside it read exactly what she needed to see: SUBWAY. 

 

Relief washed over her instantaneously. Perfect. Not only did she now have a way out of stressing about what to say next, but it meant she wouldn’t have to face the humiliation of admitting she’d been bluffing about knowing where she was going. The tightness in her chest loosened, and she felt a spark of triumph—this was her chance to redirect the focus before she completely lost control of herself.

 

As they continued to move with the flow of foot traffic, Uzi suddenly lifted her arm and jabbed a finger toward the break in the crowd ahead. “There,” she said, raising her voice just enough to be heard over the noise. “Pretty sure that’s the subway entrance.”

 

N blinked, his head swiveling as he tried to follow her gesture. With the press of drones all around them, it wasn’t surprising that he looked completely lost. “Where?” he asked, brow furrowing as though he couldn’t pick it out.

 

Uzi let out a low, frustrated groan. Stopping dead here wasn’t an option—not unless she wanted to get trampled by strangers from behind. Without another thought, she reached over, snagged N’s hand, and tugged him along with her.

 

The sudden contact startled him. “Whoa—okay—” he yelped, stumbling a half step like he’d nearly lost his balance before catching it again. But he didn’t resist her pull—in fact, his fingers quickly curled back around hers, his grip light but steady, as though holding on made the chaos of the sidewalk a little less overwhelming.

 

Uzi’s face warmed, but she kept her eyes fixed ahead, forcing herself to look like she wasn’t even thinking about it. She marched them through the crowd until the swarm of bodies parted just enough to reveal the square cut into the sidewalk.

 

They finally stopped at the railing, staring down at the entrance. Concrete stairs disappeared into shadow, split by twin metal handrails. It wasn’t flashy, not like the majority of other places in New Ore City—just practical, unremarkable.

 

But Uzi’s chest buzzed with restless energy. Her fingers twitched slightly in N’s hand as she became lost in thought. Even through all the gray drabness of the stairs, it still stood out to her; for her, it was the gateway to something new, something alive. She couldn’t quite keep the spark of excitement from showing on her face, though she tried to temper it with her usual nonchalance. Inside, though, she felt like she could almost bounce around with anticipation.

 

N hadn’t let go of her hand. Even when they stopped at the railing, even when she leaned ever so slightly forward to peer down into the dim stairwell, his hand stayed anchored to hers—gentle, steady, like he wasn’t even thinking about it. Uzi only noticed when he quietly said her name.

 

“Uzi?”

 

She blinked, snapping out of her daze, and turned to him. “Yeah?”

 

He shifted slightly, his thumb brushing against her hand as though he’d just realized he was still holding it. “Are we… going down now, or…?” His voice trailed, uncertain.

 

Uzi tilted her head, pretending she hadn’t been standing there zoning out, “Uh, yeah—obviously,” she said quickly, forcing a calm and collected tone. “What else would we be doing?”

 

N looked at her with a flicker of bewilderment, brows drawn together like he was about to question her for saying that—she was the one who had been standing there zoning out, after all. But, Uzi just smirked, cutting him off before he could speak up, “C’mon.”

 

With that, she slipped her hand free of his and strode toward the stairs. N froze for a second, then startled, blurting, “Wait up—” before hurrying after her.

 

The steps descended in two flights, with a small flat ledge in between. Once she made it to the first ledge, Uzi paused. She became more aware of the metal rail that split the center, as it gleamed faintly under the overhead lights. Uzi’s smirk sharpened the moment she laid eyes on it—an idea sparking in her head.

 

As N caught up beside her, she jerked her chin toward the rail. “Watch this.”

 

He blinked, immediately suspicious. “Wait, what are you—” Realization hit, and his voice shot up an octave. “Uzi, don’t—! You could get hurt!” 

 

But it was far too late. Uzi was already swinging herself onto the slick rail, boots skimming the edge before she planted both feet and let gravity carry her. Wind rushed against her face, her balance wobbly but steady enough, and she braced her legs for the jolt at the end.

 

She glanced sideways mid-slide—just in time to see N practically bolting down the stairs after her, wide-eyed and frantic, one hand outstretched as if he could grab her if he reached his arm out enough. His expression was such a mix of panic and desperation that it made her smirk widen into a cheeky grin, her chest buzzing with the reckless thrill of it all.

 

The rail ended before she even realized it, the ground rushing up at her too quickly for comfort. Uzi’s eyes widened as she jolted her boots forward, trying to hop off with some semblance of control. The landing was anything but graceful—momentum shoved her forward, forcing her into a clumsy stumble of quick steps just to keep from pitching face-first onto the concrete.

 

She nearly lost it. Her balance wavered, her arms flailed slightly—she felt herself falling, and her confidence disappeared, panic replacing it and setting in. But that’s when a steady grip suddenly anchored her—fingers catching her waist from behind, firm but careful. The touch was instant, instinctive. She could tell that it was N just by how reverent the grasp was.

 

For a brief heartbeat he held her there, pulling her towards him slightly. His chest almost brushed her back, as though making absolutely sure she wasn’t about to crash.

 

Uzi felt the rush of his presence—warm, solid, distinct. The second she straightened enough to look stable and she started to pull away, he released her, stepping back without hesitation.

 

She turned sharply to face him, crossing her arms tight against her chest. Her eyes narrowed—not out of genuine anger at him, but bristling irritation that she’d almost made a fool of herself in the first place. “You didn’t have to do that,” she snapped, her tone dry and defensive. “I totally had it under control.” 

 

N looked back at her, his face still pale from the scare. His eyes widened, expression twisting into sheer disbelief. He stared at her as though she’d just lost her mind. “Are you serious right now?” his voice cracked with urgency. “You did not have control—you nearly face-planted into the concrete!” 

 

Uzi’s eyes narrowed into a faint glare, though the sharpness wasn’t truly for him. He wasn’t wrong. As much as she wanted to insist otherwise, she had nearly crashed. And the way he looked at her—less angry, more distressed—made it clear his words came from worry, not scolding. The sight of him all wound up like that, shoulders tight, eyes wide, as though her tripping would’ve been some catastrophe… it was ridiculous. Endearing, even. 

 

Before she could stop herself, Uzi let out a sharp laugh, shaking her head. The sound was tinged with exasperation, maybe even leftover adrenaline.

 

N froze, dumbfounded, blinking at her like he couldn’t remotely fathom what part of this she found amusing. 

 

“I’m fine, see?” Uzi said, lifting her arms briefly and gesturing down at herself as if to prove her point. “Not even a scratch.”

 

And before her brain had a chance to second-guess the impulse, she reached out and slipped her fingers around his. His hand was warm against hers, trembling at first—but the tension bled out of him almost instantly, his shoulders lowering as if that small contact reassured him more than her words ever could.

 

Uzi gave his hand a gentle tug, her smirk returning. “C’mon—we’ve got a train to catch.”

 

Her chest buzzed at the realization that she wasn’t just doing this to calm him—part of her wanted the excuse to hold on.

 

N gave her hand a quick, barely perceivable squeeze, his voice a little uneven as he remarked, “Oh—… well, I’m just glad you’re okay, then.”

 

That faint awkwardness in his tone made Uzi’s chest warm, and before she could stop herself, a shy smile fell upon her visage. She didn’t even bother to fight it this time—it was too easy to feel lighter around him.

 

But her thoughts derailed the moment they both stepped into a short entry corridor.

 

The space narrowed into a row of gates, sleek black metal on either side. In front of them, three turnstiles stood waiting, each topped with a small screen flashing a little icon of a card being tapped, and a slot below clearly meant for cash. Uzi came to a halt, staring at the setup with her mouth parting slightly in surprise.

 

“Wait,” she muttered, turning toward N. “We have to pay to get in?”

 

He blinked at her, then cracked a look of fond disbelief, his lips twitching upward like he couldn’t help himself. “Why would you think it’d be free? You’ve gotta pay for practically everything these days.”

 

Uzi’s grin returned almost immediately, crooked and mischievous. She gave a little shrug, “Yeah, yeah. Fair point.”

 

She tried to play it off with her usual bravado, but in truth, she hadn’t even thought that far ahead. Not when she was so caught up in the fact that she’d actually gotten them here—and maybe a little caught up with N himself.

 

Uzi finally let go of his hand so she could dig into her pocket, tugging out her phone. The absence of his touch left her fingers feeling oddly bare, the faint warmth of his grip still clinging to her skin. She ignored it, focusing instead on unlocking the screen.

 

Her dad’s card was already loaded onto her account—his way of making sure she didn’t starve, since, well… she was broke and jobless. Not exactly her favorite detail to think about right now.

 

As she flicked through her phone, N tilted his head at her, brows drawn slightly together. “Why’d you let go?” he asked, voice soft and low.

 

Her gaze turned up at him, blinking. “Huh?”

 

N’s expression flickered as though he realized what he’d just said. His face went a little stiff, and he quickly waved a hand, flustered. “Ah—no, it’s… never mind. Doesn’t matter.” He shifted awkwardly, then tried to redirect, his voice uneven. “…Are you paying with your phone?”

 

Uzi studied him for a second, and though she didn’t say anything about it, she couldn’t help but find it… kind of cute. The way he seemed thrown off just by her letting go, like he noticed the absence instantly, maybe even missed it.

 

She gave a little nod, her tone casual as she shrugged. “Yeah. Don’t have any cash.”

 

Her thumb hovered over the app, trying to act like this was all normal, when really, she was biting back the smallest smirk.

 

N shifted a little closer as they reached the turnstiles, his voice quiet but certain. “I can pay for both of us.”

 

Uzi opened her mouth, ready to brush it off with her usual I’ve got itbut she stopped herself. If she refused outright, he’d probably insist anyway, and she didn’t want him thinking she was ungrateful for the offer. Not after earlier, when she had made him feel self conscious for being polite… Besides, it wasn’t like letting him pay was the end of the world. So instead, she gave him a small nod, her tone even. “Alright. Sure.” 

 

N smiled faintly, a relieved look flashing across his face, like he’d half-expected her to argue. He stepped forward first, phone in hand. A soft electronic chime rang out as the screen lit green, and the turnstile clicked open. Uzi moved to the one beside him, slipping through at the same pace so they emerged side by side again.

 

The moment they crossed over, the space seemed to open up around them. The air was thick and hard to breathe, with the mingling scents of gasoline, steel, and a faint tinge of must. It wasn’t necessarily the nicest place, but at least it didn’t look terrible… sort of. The ground beneath their feet was tiled in neat rows of gray concrete rectangles, worn smooth by endless traffic. A bold strip of faded yellow paint cut sharply along the edge of the platform—its color bright but a little scuffed, a harsh warning not to drift too close to the tracks.

 

Every few yards, tall pillars stood sentry along the platform, painted a dull green at the bottom, with a harsh line in the middle that lead to the rest of the above pillar being an off-white. Their bulk stretched up into the ceiling, supporting the heavy concrete above. A majority of them had worn out stickers and graffiti, a few looking painted over, but still see through, like whoever had painted over it had given up halfway through. Fluorescent lights buzzed overhead, casting the space in a sterile glow that made the tile gleam. Dead bugs littered the inside of the light, their silhouette blocking a bit of the glow. The hum of the bulbs was joined by the chatter of countless voices—snippets of conversation weaving together into a constant murmur, punctuated now and then by spurts of laughter or the harsh clang of boots on tile. From somewhere deep in the tunnel, the long blare of a train horn rolled through, reverberating against the walls and sending a faint vibration through the floor.

 

Uzi took it all in with sharp eyes, her expression flickering with something close to awe. Even if it had its flaws… it felt alive. Chaotic, but ever so slightly steady—like the heartbeat of the city itself. For a moment, she let herself breathe it in, the press of strangers, the clatter, the sharp tang of electricity in the air. She was excited, though she kept her expression as neutral as she could manage, not wanting N to see how giddy she felt inside. 

 

She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye, wondering what he thought of it, and whether the noise and crowd pressed on him the same way it did her—loud, overwhelming, but exhilarating nonetheless. 

 

Uzi’s her eyes swept over the subway, wide and gleaming with wonder. She couldn’t help the breath that slipped from her. “Woah…”

 

A soft, unexpected laugh came from beside her.

 

She whipped her head toward N, narrowing her eyes into a mock glare. “What’s so funny?” 

 

N lifted his hands in mock innocence, but the grin stretching across his face betrayed him. “Nothing,” he said, voice lilting with amusement. Then, with that same wide, unguarded smile, he added, “I just think it’s… kind of cute, seeing you so awe-struck at a place like… this.

 

Her breath caught. Heat surged through her face so fast she was sure she must’ve been glowing red. Her eyes widened before narrowing again, sharper this time—not that it hid the fluster in her expression. “Wha—? You can’t just… say things like that! And what do you mean, ‘a place like this’?!”

 

But he only smiled more, his eyes glinting as if he’d just discovered a secret. He completely side-stepped her question. “Why not?” he teased lightly. “It’s not like you dislike it.”

 

Her glare deepened, but it faltered at the edges. He’d caught her off guard, completely called her out, and she had no quick retort to save her.

 

She stared up at him, electricity buzzing in the air between them, both waiting for the other to break. She opened her mouth, ready to deny it, to throw back some sharp remark—

 

—and then N leaned down slightly, his expression soft but mischievous, and tapped a finger against the tip of her nose.

 

Boop. 

 

Uzi froze, her mouth falling open in stunned disbelief. Her entire face went hot, and she could feel every drone in the station fade into background noise. N tilted his head, smiling down at her like this was the most amusing thing in the world, his eyes warm, playful, and just a little daring.

 

Uzi’s processors scrambled. She wanted to yell at him, or shove him, or something, but her body wouldn’t move. Instead she just stood there, utterly floored, staring at him like he’d grown a second head.

 

Inside, though… she couldn’t help it. A small, reluctant part of her melted at how easily he disarmed her.

 

Though, she’d never admit that aloud.

 

Uzi’s mouth worked uselessly, her voice catching in her throat as she tried to string something together. “Y–You—ugh! You’re so insufferable!she finally blurted, heat flooding her cheeks.

 

In a flurry of frustration, she ended up shoving him lightly. It wasn’t angry—more like a reflex, the only outlet for the chaos knotting inside her. She folded her arms tight across her chest, glaring daggers at him to mask how flustered she felt. “Don’t you ever do that again, or else I’ll—”

 

She stopped dead. Her thoughts scrambled, but nothing came. No threat, no quip, no clever retort. Her mind was a blank, buzzing mess. 

 

N’s grin widened as if he’d been waiting for this. His tone turned devious, teasing, his voice dropping just enough to taunt. “Or else what?” 

 

Her hands flew up, gesturing wildly as if her fingers could grasp the comeback she couldn’t think of. “I’ll—I’ll—!” she stammered, but the words refused to come. She ended up standing there, scowling at him with her arms dropping back to her sides, cheeks burning hotter than ever.

 

“…Fine,” she muttered sharply, defeated. “You win. But you’re going to pay for this.” 

 

N tilted his head, his smile softening into something content, almost smug in its calmness. “Whatever you say,” he replied lightly, as though he didn’t mind in the slightest.

 

Uzi clenched her arms tighter, glaring at the floor to keep from meeting his eyes again. He was impossible. Completely impossible. And yet, despite herself, she couldn’t stop the small flicker of warmth in her chest—the irritating realization that she didn’t entirely hate losing to him. 

 

Uzi scoffed and rolled her eyes, exasperated with him, but she didn’t move away when N suddenly shifted a bit closer. If anything, when the back of his hand brushed against hers unexpectedly, she felt her breath catch. For a heartbeat she debated pulling away—keeping her walls up—but her body betrayed her. She leaned into the touch without thinking.

 

When his fingers curled, hesitant at first, over her own, she immediately laced hers back with his. No hesitation. No excuses. Just the quiet comfort of it.

 

N’s voice broke the silence, softer this time, the cheekiness dying down, tempering with something more careful. “So… I guess it’s safe to say your hand’s healed now, right?”

 

Her eyes flicked up at him, puzzled. “Huh?” she asked, tilting her head slightly. Then it hit her. Right. That.

 

She blinked down at their joined hands, the memory of the used-to-be gash on her hand, and the… events that took place in the alley way rushing back. But she buried them, at first. 

 

Uzi shifted her gaze away, her voice quieter than usual. “Oh—yeah. It’s better now.” The words tumbled out quickly, like she wanted them over with.

 

Her eyes flicked toward the tiled floor, anything to avoid replaying the memory that had immediately surfaced the moment he brought it up. But she couldn’t bury it down far enough, and the memory surfaced. The alleyway, his tongue pressed against her cut hand—she shoved the image away as fast as she could, but it left a static buzz in her chest all the same.

 

Still… no matter how bizarre the whole thing had been, she couldn’t deny the result. Her hand was fine. Better than fine. And she hadn’t even thanked him for it. That realization made her lips part hesitantly, the words sticking stubbornly in her throat until she forced them out. “...Thanks.”

 

For a moment, N blinked at her, head tilted in confusion like he didn’t understand what she meant. Then she saw it click. His eyes widened just slightly, and a hue of pink—faint but noticeable—crept across his cheeks.

 

He grew sheepish, releasing a soft laugh under his breath as he rubbed the back of his neck with his free hand. “Oh—uh. No problem,” he said, voice a little awkward now, gentler. He hesitated, then dropped his eyes for a second before meeting hers again. “Sorry if I was… weird about it. I could kinda tell you weren’t comfortable. I just… I wasn’t really thinking—but that’s not an excuse.”

 

Uzi’s stomach twisted, because of course he had noticed. Of course he’d picked up on how tense she’d been. The apology wasn’t necessary—she knew that much—but it still got under her skin, stirring that same confusing mixture of gratitude and embarrassment. Her hand, still laced with his, felt impossibly warm.

 

Uzi’s eyes flicked down to where their hands were still joined, her fingers shifting slightly against his as if to settle more comfortably into the shape of his grip. She let out a small breath before speaking, her voice softer than before. “You don’t have to apologize. I mean… it’s not like you can really do anything about it.”

 

She didn’t bother elaborating any further—she knew he’d understand what she meant. That constant battle with his urges, the way oil called to him whether he wanted it to or not. It wasn’t something he could simply switch off, no matter how hard he tried. He’d told her enough for her to know it was part of him, tied to what he was. 

 

When she lifted her gaze again, she caught the shift in his face. He wasn’t meeting her eyes anymore, his expression slipping into something weighted. That trace of guilt that crossed his features tugged at her chest, as if he hated being reminded of the parts of himself he couldn’t control.

 

“Yeah…” N murmured finally, the word quiet, heavy, his head dipping just a little.

 

The sight made her throat tighten. She hadn’t meant to drag him down like that. Not wanting the mood to linger, Uzi gave his hand a small tug, pulling his attention back to her. Her voice was brisk, but not unkind. “C’mon. We should probably figure out where we’re supposed to board before we just stand here looking dumb.”

 

That did it—his eyes lit up again, expression snapping back toward something more familiar, his posture perking up. “Right,” he said, quick, almost eager. His grip tightened subtly around hers, not in desperation, but reassurance.

 

Together, they began weaving through the bustling crowd, hand in hand, the hum of the station swelling around them.

 

As they moved along with the flow of the throng of drones, Uzi kept her eyes scanning the wide tiled space, half expecting to see some kind of marked platform. But nothing stood out—just the yellow line running along the edge and clusters of drones waiting idly in different spots.

 

Before she could put voice to the thought, N tilted his head and spoke first, his tone curious. “Do you think we can just… board anywhere?”

 

Uzi gave a half-shrug, keeping her voice casual, though she wasn’t any more certain than he was. “Looks like it.”

 

There was a small pause, filled only by the muffled chatter around them and the faint rattle of an approaching train echoing down the tunnel. Then Uzi glanced back up at him, brushing her bangs from her eyes. “Want to find somewhere to sit while we wait?”

 

N’s face brightened, his lips tugging into a soft smile as he nodded. “That’d be great.”

 

Uzi let her gaze sweep the area again, searching for a bench tucked against the walls or pillars, but before she could spot anything, she felt the light squeeze of his hand around hers to get her attention. The tiny, almost instinctive action sent a flicker of warmth running through her chest, quick and disorienting, like her stomach had dropped out.

 

She turned to him, trying not to let her expression give away too much, and found him pointing with his free hand toward the far side of the platform. “There’s a bench over there,” he said, his tone easy, as if it hadn’t just thrown her off balance completely.

 

She cleared her throat and gave a quick nod. “Yeah, I see it.”

 

Together, they started weaving through the crowd again, their shoulders brushing as they walked—neither of them loosening their hold on the other’s hand.

 

Uzi’s mind had been pleasantly adrift, tuned only to the faint pressure of N’s hand wrapped in hers and the way his shoulder brushed against her arm with every step.

 

It was easy to forget the crowded station around them—until, from the edge of her vision, she caught a drone glancing their way. Just some stranger, nothing more, but it snapped her out of her daze all the same.

 

Her stomach lurched.

 

She was holding his hand. In public!

 

The warmth that had felt so grounding a moment ago now burned against her skin like a spotlight, and before she could stop herself, she yanked her hand free.

 

N noticed instantly. His stride faltered, his gaze flicking to her with concern, though he kept walking at her side. “Hey… is something wrong? Did something happen?” His tone was tentative, as if bracing for an answer he didn’t want to hear.

 

Uzi’s throat tightened. She blinked hard, then shook her head, forcing her eyes away from his. “No. Well—” she bit down on her lip, heat rising to her face, “—kind of.” 

 

By then they had reached the bench tucked against a pillar, and neither spoke as they sat down, the silence heavy but not unfriendly. Uzi hunched forward slightly, fiddling with the hem of her sleeve. Her voice dropped low when she finally spoke, her words muttered almost more to herself than to him.

 

“It’s just… I forgot we were in public.” She risked a glance at him, then quickly looked back at the floor, her cheeks burning hotter. “And now it probably looks like we’re… y’know. A couple or something.” 

 

The last words came out in a hurried mumble, so quiet she almost hoped he hadn’t heard them at all.

 

The silence between them stretched thin, heavy enough that Uzi’s circuits buzzed with discomfort. She still couldn’t bring herself to meet his eyes, her gaze fixed stubbornly on the tiled floor.

 

That’s when N’s voice broke through, softer than usual, hesitant but steady enough to make her chest tighten. “Would… that be such a bad thing, though?”

 

Her head jerked slightly, but she didn’t turn toward him. “What?” Her voice was sharper than intended, born of pure shock.

 

He shifted beside her, the weight of his uncertainty almost palpable. “I mean—if other drones thought we were… a couple.” He trailed off like he was testing the ground beneath his feet, unsure if it would hold.

 

Uzi blinked, then again, and again, her mind a complete blank. She couldn’t even muster her usual sharp comeback.

 

Did he just… say that?!

 

The thought looped endlessly, tangled with the unrelenting hotness rushing to her face.

 

She sat there, utterly still, silence hanging in the air like static.

 

N was the one to break it. “Oh, crud—sorry.” His words tumbled out in a flustered rush, his hands twisting nervously in his lap. “I didn’t mean—if that made you uncomfortable. I should’ve thought before I said it, just—forget I ever—”

 

“N.” 

 

Her voice cut through his rambling. Not loud, not sharp, just… steady. It was all she could manage.

 

He froze, then quietly replied, “…Uzi?” His tone was uncertain, almost wary, like he wasn’t sure what she’d say next.

 

Uzi inhaled, her fingers gripping at her sleeves as she stared down at them. “…Maybe we could… talk about this another time,” she murmured, the words uneven, stumbling. “I just—“ she sighed, “I don’t… know. Right now.” Her voice faltered at the end, betraying how unsteady she felt, how much the question had shaken her.

 

Uzi’s mind spun in circles, the same thought crashing against itself over and over. She had thought about this before—more times than she wanted to admit—but hearing N just… say it outright? No buildup, no dodging around the edges, just asking the question she’d been terrified of even thinking about? Her systems practically seized. 

 

She wasn’t ready for this. Not even close. 

 

The thought of what are we had always lingered in the back of her head, but that was the exact problem—if she gave him any kind of answer, it would open the door to a conversation she couldn’t even begin to frame. It was like staring at a locked gate with no idea what key fit, no idea what was on the other side, only the weight of knowing once she stepped through, there was no undoing it.

 

She told herself she’d worry about it later. She knew she was putting it off—again—but right now wasn’t the time. She was too keyed up by being here, by the pulse of the subway around them, by the strange thrill of sharing this with him. She didn’t want to smother that with something heavy, something that could tip the entire moment sideways. 

 

N’s sudden voice pulled her back, quiet and careful, every word measured like he was afraid of making another misstep. “If you need space, Uzi… I can give it to you.”

 

Her chest tightened, panic pricking at her circuits before she could even think.

 

Space? No—that wasn’t what she wanted at all! She didn’t want distance, not from him. If anything, she wanted the complete opposite. It wasn’t him she was avoiding—it was the conversation, the weight of it, the way it threatened to swallow all the fragile good she had with him right now. 

 

Before she could even form the words to tell him that, the thunder of the approaching train tore through the station. Air rushed past them in a sudden, violent gust, sweeping her bangs into her face and tugging at her jacket.

 

For a split second, everything felt raw and alive, the noise, the gust of wind, the movement, the sheer force of it. 

 

Uzi turned instinctively toward N, strands of violet hair whipping across her vision, and found him already looking at her. The rush of wind made her feel almost weightless, her core buzzing with exhilaration, and yet beneath it all sat the sharper, quieter ache—how badly she wanted him to understand. It wasn’t space she craved. It was just… time. Time before she had to face that impossible question. 

 

For a second everything narrowed to a pinpoint—the roar of the train, the blur of bodies through the windows, the flash of neon yellow—and Uzi simply stopped worrying about any of it.

 

She let the noise fall away and, on impulse, reached up.

 

Her fingers lightly brushed his jaw, then settled; she cupped his cheek like it was the most natural thing in the world.

 

N went still for a beat, confusion written across his face, but the confusion softened the instant she touched him.

 

He didn’t pull back. If anything, he leaned into her hand, cheek pressing against her palm as if he’d been holding his breath and she’d finally given him permission to exhale. The contact was warm and pliant and shockingly intimate in the middle of the station, and the smallness of it—him leaning into her—made something in her chest lurch.

 

She dragged her thumb once across the slope of his cheek, the motion deliberate and gentle. “I don’t want space,” she said, voice low enough that only he could hear, like she was telling him a secret.

 

“I want… time. To figure things out. With you.”

 

The words felt enormous when they left her, frank and more honest than she’d allowed herself to be in a long time.

 

N’s eyes widened a fraction, brows lifting, like he was taking the sentence apart and mollifying at every piece. Then his expression softened into something almost painfully tender—a small pout at the corner of his mouth, a smile that looked like it hurt to hold in.

 

He blinked, swallowed, and the single word that came out was thin, breathless, completely earnest. “Okay.”

 

Uzi held his gaze for a moment that was a fleeting eternity.

 

There was a frantic little urge to bridge the space with a kiss, to stop this steadiness from being only a feeling she’d have to tuck away again later.

 

But fought it down, pressed the end of her thumb reverently against his cheek one last time, and let her hand fall free. The denial felt like a promise she was making to herself—not because she didn’t want to, but because she wanted it to mean something more when it happened.

 

The train shuddered to a halt in a wash of light and sound. Doors sighed open, and for a heartbeat the world snapped back—the platform, the shuffle of other drones, the business of moving on.

 

Uzi’s chest hummed with a giddy, nervous electricity. She stood, the smile she couldn’t quite hide stretching across her face. “Let’s go,” she said, small and bright.

 

N nodded, his expression steady and a little open, like he’d just been handed something fragile and solemn and wonderful that filled him with sheer and utter delight.

 

They rose together and walked toward the yawning doorway, shoulder to shoulder, their steps matching without thinking. Around them drones flowed in and out, but Uzi didn’t notice the crowd. She only felt the echo of his hand where it had been, the heat of the exchange, and the strange, new certainty that they would try to figure it out, side by side.

Notes:

AHHHH

If you couldn’t tell, this chapter was super self indulgent 😈

Sorry for posting a day late. Hope it was worth the wait.

When I first started writing it, I had a bit of a writers block and thought it was shit. But I went back and fixed it (I think) but I think the further you get into the chapter, the better it gets.

If you haven’t noticed, I included a few links. The first two were just photos of subways ig, so u could get a better idea of what they look like. I used those as a reference, but then added more to them ig, cuz I thought they were kinda boring.

Oh also speaking of subways, I had to do a SHIT TON of research on them, cuz I’ve never been to one before 😭🤚 I hope I got it accurate enough. I just watched a few videos on what they looked like and how u enter them, cuz I didn’t even know that.

I’m basing Uzi’s excitement ig kinda off the idea of how I’d feel going into one. Like, I haven’t really gone to the north (they don’t have subways where I’m from cuz if u dig under ground you’ll js hit rock and water 🤧 so we can’t have basements either) but the idea of going on a train in a subway has always seemed kinda cool to me. Even if it’s a mundane task people do almost every day on their commute to work, and there’s weird asf people on it that u have to avoid eye contact with, it still seems like it’d be an experience going into one the first time- right? I can’t be the only one who thinks this 💔

I’ve been on a train before but js like… a normal one. And it was a little different cuz it was on a vacation trip ig, and so I had a tiny little room in it that you slept in overnight, cuz like I think I rode in it from where I live all the way to Arizona to see the Grand Canyon?? Idk som like that, I was young. But the point of me bringing this up was that was a pretty fun experience the first time, but I can imagine if u don’t have a room and go one one every day it’d kinda suck. Or like I’ve been on a public bus a few times, and the first time was like… idk how to explain it.

I’m probably js making things like that seem deeper than they actually are, but I’m js extra, sorry 😭🤚

Anyways, the last link is a little song I thought fit the moment. Wanted it to be kinda immersive ig cuz I spent a shit ton of time writing and revising and editing the last part since I wanted it to be super good.

Icl, it was a really impulsive idea. I was js gonna have Uzi be like “oh, it’s fine, you don’t have to apologize? and then get interrupted by the train or wtv, but then I thought that was boring so I made it super sweet and self indulgent cuz I wanted to 😍

Also it’s slight angst/comfort right? Cuz Uzi’s being like “oh I don’t know how to process shit because I have commitment issues or wtv 😒” but then she finally grows a pair and decides to be really sweet to N cuz she feels like he deserves it, after everything.

And I think if I js made her still stand-offish after everything it’d kinda piss me off cuz like… bro 😭 where would the character development be?!??!!? Like gtfo

Also I need a bunch of nice things to happen before something bad happens. Not confirming nor denying that something bad will happen, js saying in general, just in case 🤷 who knows though, it’s not like I’m the one writing this or som 🥱

(Watch me js be messing around with yall like this is a complete red herring and nothing actually happens 😈)

ANYWAYYYYSSSSS next chapter like… Saturday? Should be then. If not, I’ll post on Sunday, even though I don’t like posting on Sundays. It’s not like I have a deep reason though for that or som, I js don’t wanna post on my lazy Sunday 😒 but yeah I’ll stop being lazy for once if it comes to that ig 🙄

Okay that’s all I have to say BYE 😫

Chapter 97: Awkward

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

After stepping onto the train, Uzi and N settled onto one of the scuffed blue seats.

 

It looked like they had seen better decades—the vinyl was marred with graffiti, initials clawed into the plastic, half-peeled stickers and tags that had faded so much the design was no longer recognizable. On top of that, the damp, must smell from the outside had followed them into the small, enclosed space, and was intensified by an obnoxious amount.

 

Around them drones dozed, scrolled their phones, or stared blankly at nothing—everyone suitably worn-down and motionless in that way public transit seems to makes drones feel.

 

One figure, though, stuck out like a sore thumb: a drone across from them in an excessively-bright orange Hawaiian shirt, legs stretched out like he owned the place, a battered brown briefcase resting on his knees. He lounged with the easy, careless posture of someone who either didn’t have anywhere to be or was too far gone to care.

 

Uzi’s gaze lingered on him for a moment, the sight souring into something more akin to amusement.

 

Unexpectedly, N nudged her with his elbow, light enough to where no one would notice if they weren’t looking. He leaned closer and murmured, “You see that guy?”

 

Uzi didn’t bother to look twice. “How could I not?” she said, low and deadpan. “He looks like a life-sized highlighter.” The corner of her mouth twitched upward. 

 

N sat up a little straighter as if the man had become suddenly more interesting, eyes tracking him with an absent, mild curiosity.

 

Uzi jabbed him in the ribs with a playful elbow. “You’re such a dork,” she said, glancing at him sideways.

 

He rolled his eyes—an exaggerated, theatrical roll—but there was no real irritation in it. The grin plastered on his face said it all—it was the kind that made her feel small and ridiculous and oddly safe all at once.

 

The doors hissed shut with a low, metallic groan, cutting off any remaining stragglers. Uzi caught sight of one drone in particular outside, banging on the glass in defeat when the doors shut. They soon gave up, shoulders slumping as they trudged away like the universe itself had betrayed them.

 

She couldn’t help it—a quick laugh slipped out of her, soft and sharp under her breath.

 

N tilted toward her, catching it immediately.

 

“What’s so funny?” His voice carried a half-curious, half-suspicious lilt, like he thought she was keeping something from him—but it was more poking fun if anything.

 

Uzi smirked a tad, tucking her arms across her chest like she could’ve hidden the sound. “Nothinggg–” Her tone wasn’t dismissive, though—it was more like a challenge, a tease. 

 

N raised a brow. “Are you sure?” 

 

“Absolutely positive,” she said, her smirk widening as she met his eyes for only a second before turning away.

 

That was when, without warning, his fingers darted out and pinched her upper arm. It wasn’t hard, but enough to jolt her.

 

Uzi yelped, clutching the spot with wide eyes before whipping her head toward him, with a glare sharp enough to cut metal. “Hey—!”

 

But N cut her off, voice sing-song and far too pleased with himself. “I know you’re lying.” He dragged out the words teasingly.

 

Her eye twitched in annoyance, her expression scandalized. “That does not warrant a pinch!” 

 

His grin stretched wider, smug but playful. “So… you’re not denying it?” 

 

Uzi groaned and rolled her eyes so hard she thought they might fall out of her head. “I’m not even gonna bother answering you.” 

 

N leaned back in the seat, throwing her a sly side-eye, the a cheeky grin tugging at his mouth. “Technically, you just did.”

 

Uzi gritted her teeth, both infuriated and flustered at once. He was impossible—and she hated how much she secretly liked it. 

 

Unexpectedly, N’s fingers darted out again—a quick, mischievous pinch on her upper arm once more—and Uzi’s face went incandescent. She swatted at his hand reflexively, missing by a hair, and barked, “Stop doing that!” Her voice came out sharper than she meant; her entire face felt hot and her heart thudded a little too fast. 

 

N didn’t meet her glare. He sat back, palms flat on his knees, and tapped a slow, casual rhythm with his fingers like nothing at all had happened, the corner of his mouth still upturned in that infuriating smirk. For a full moment he looked utterly unconcerned, like he had no care in the world, which only made Uzi more livid.

 

That’s when the train lurched into motion.

 

But, it was gentle shove rather than the violent yank she’d expected. The carriage rolled forward in soft bumps; she could imagine walking down the aisle would probably be difficult, but sitting seemed easy enough.

 

Uzi focused back to the present moment. She let out an exasperated scoff. “Don’t ignore me!” she snapped, hands gesturing and then balling into fist.

 

N glanced away as if the words were a breeze and not aimed at him. That look—calm, deliberately distant—was the final straw.

 

Uzi narrowed her eyes, a slow, plotting annoyance flaring up. She reached for payback, fingers poised to give him a pinch of her own.

 

Before her hand could connect to his arm, N’s palm closed over her wrist, catching her mid-reach without even looking at her. He didn’t yank or scold; the grip was simply firm, like someone steadying a teetering shelf. 

 

Uzi’s jaw fell open in utter disbelief that he just did that. For a second the world narrowed to the warmth of his hand around hers and the absurdity of being stopped mid-mischief.

 

Why was he being like this?! Why did he have to be so impossibly calm and catastrophically irritating all at once? 

 

He finally turned to her, looking proud of himself, “Gotcha!” N said triumphantly, like he’d just won something absurdly important.

 

Uzi blinked, more flustered yet fervid than she would ever admit. But, before she could even begin to process it, his other hand reached up and—

 

Boop.

 

He pressed his fingertip against the tip of her nose. Again!? Just like he had earlier. It was the worst, most horrible, yet disarming thing he could’ve done in the moment. Her heart hit her ribs like someone had thumped a drum; her breath snagged and nowhere to go. 

 

Then, the reality of the moment smacked her in full force. She ripped her hand free from his grip, before shoving him half-heartedly, and then she spun away and buried her face in her palms; as if that could conceal her from him.

 

She wasn’t mad—the thought of that made her snort inwardly—she was… combustibly nonplussed. The heat that had crawled up her neck and face radiated out through her fingers, while her breathing felt loud and wrong.

 

She heard N fumble a little when she had shoved him, like he’d been caught off balance, but he recovered quickly, steadying himself without making a scene.

 

“Robo-God…!” she muttered into her hands, voice muffled. “I hate you—!” The words were automatic, a reflexive shield, but they came out thin and dishonest even to her own ears. 

 

She could feel him looking at her—probably in that steady, searching way of his—and it made the ‘confession’ almost meaningless.

 

She stayed pressed against her palms for a long second, hoping sheer will could cool her down. Then something feather-light brushed her knuckles. Fingertips—gentle and reverent—gently wrapped around the edged of her hands to turn her every so slightly. Then, they nudged her hands aside, guiding them down. The motion was so careful like if he made one wrong move she’d shatter—which, honestly, she felt like she would.

 

When her hands were peeled away, N was inches from her, close enough she could see the subtle yellow glow of his irises and the soft line of his mouth. He leaned in, breath warm and steady. “But I don’t hate you,” he uttered feebly, voice low enough that it felt like it was only for her. There was no bravado—only a quiet, earnest steadiness that unspooled the tightness in her chest. 

 

Uzi stiffened, every nerve buzzing. But then her eyes narrowed as she attempted to shove down the butterflies in her stomach that were so desperately trying to escape. “Why are you doing this?” she muttered, more accusation than question. 

 

N blinked, as if he’d been surprised by the directness. He searched her face for a beat, voice soft when he answered. “I couldn’t stop myself,” he said. “I wanted to see your pretty face.” There was no teasing in it—just honest, awkward need.

 

She let out a flat sound that was somewhere between a scoff and a laugh. “You’re so cheesy, N,” she said, the words clipped but not unkind.

 

Uzi eased back away from him and into the seat. She straightened, pressing her spine against the cool plastic as if the contact would steady her. She could still feel the ghost of his delicate touch on the backs of her hands, and the aftershiver of the close space between them. Her face stayed deliberately turned away, because looking at him felt like inviting a current she wasn’t sure she knew how to handle.

 

N’s voice came more reserved this time, threaded with something like caution. “You don’t hate it, though… right?”

 

The question made her pause. For an absurd moment she unloaded every defense she’d rehearsed—sarcastic comebacks, indifference—but they dissolved into air. She chewed her lip, then let out a small, reluctant sound. “…No,” she admitted, her tone grudging yet somehow jarringly soft for her. 

 

When she glanced at him finally, it was only to the side. N’s cheeks carried a faint flush and his smile had gone sheepish but utterly steady. It was the kind of expression that made her breath gather and stick to the base of her throat and yet, somehow, felt like an anchor.

 

Uzi was immediately hyper-aware when N shifted closer, closing the space between them until his side pressed against hers. It wasn’t overbearing—just enough to make her feel his presence, solid and grounding.

 

Uzi’s first instinct was to freeze, but without letting herself think at all, her head tilted of its own accord, resting lightly on his shoulder. His reaction was instantaneous and careful: the crown of her head brushed his jaw as he leaned against her in return.

 

His hand sought hers without hesitation, fingers curling tentative but hopeful. Uzi laced hers through his without hesitation, like it was the most natural thing in the world.

 

“So…” N murmured after a beat, his voice quiet, as though afraid of breaking the fragile moment. “You’re okay with this?”

 

Uzi flicked her eyes to the side, buying herself a second before answering. “I guess,” she muttered, the words soft and a little awkward, but true.

 

There was the briefest pause—long enough for her to feel her chest tighten—before N spoke again. His tone carried none the playful teasing from earlier; it was steady, careful, and impossibly kind. “If you’re ever not, you can tell me. I’ll never be upset with you. I promise.”

 

The words landed in her stomach like a knot, but not the painful kind. It was warmth, sharp and unexpected, winding through her chest until it almost hurt. He always did this—always checked with her, always made sure she had a choice. No one else ever seemed to think about that in really any context—and especially not the way he did. It made her feel seen. Safe. 

 

She couldn’t find the right words to answer. Gratitude felt too small a word, and anything else felt clumsy. So instead, she just nodded, careful not to disturb him, and she pressed their hands together a little firmer.

 

N gave her hand one slow, deliberate squeeze before letting the pressure go, a simple gesture that somehow said everything: he understood her, and he’d keep that promise.

 

Uzi was so at ease she could’ve drifted off right there, her head nestled against N’s shoulder, his hand warm in hers. Her eyelids felt heavy, the steady clatter of the train like a lullaby—until a voice cut through the quiet.

 

It wasn’t N’s.

 

Her whole body flinched as if she’d been caught stealing.

 

The voice belonged to a middle aged drone standing a few seats away—probably in her forties, with the kind of face carved deep by exhaustion. Her hair was yanked back into a dark, completely unkempt bun that had lost the battle hours ago, and her outfit might’ve been professional once, but the wrinkles told another story.

 

She looked them up and down with nothing but disdain before muttering, her words dripping with sheer disgust.

 

“Lovebirds like you make me sick.” 

 

She didn’t stay to watch the damage land. With a brisk turn, she stalked off, swaying unstably with the train’s rhythm.

 

Uzi felt like someone had painfully ripped out one of her ribs and smacked her over the head with it.

 

She felt her pulse spike as awareness slammed into her—every set of eyes around her, imagined or real, burning against her entirety. The steady comfort from before turned brittle. She resisted the urge to yank herself away from N—but, not wanting to cause an unintentional scene, she just let go of him and scooted away slightly, to the point where they weren’t touching in any way anymore.

 

Her breath hitched, quickening, not in any pleasant way. Her cheeks burned, like she’d just been held upside down over an active volcano. She pressed a palm over half her face, desperate to hide, and the thought barreled through her head—maybe I should just break the window and jump out. It’d be a lot less humiliating than this.

 

“Fuck–…” she muttered under her breath, the curse clipped, harsh, her throat dry. She sat rigid, every muscle locked tight. 

 

N hadn’t tried to stop her when she had moved away, but out of the corner of her eye she caught him watching her, his expression shadowed with worry. That soft smile he’d worn moments ago was gone, replaced by something uncertain, almost cautious—as though he was afraid to make things worse.

 

Inside, Uzi wanted to melt into the floor and disappear. The comfort, the peace, the safety—ripped away in an instant, replaced by the kind of embarrassment that made her want to crawl out of her own plating.

 

The silence that followed was unbearable.

 

Uzi could hear the dull grind of the train against the tracks, the faint conversations of strangers, even the flicker of the lights overhead—everything except N. He sat beside her, tense, like he was holding his breath.

 

Then, all at once, the dam broke.

 

“I’m sorry,” N blurted, his voice carrying a frantic edge. His words tumbled over each other, tripping in their rush. “I should’ve—ugh,” he gestured helplessly with his hands, “I should’ve thought about it. We’re in public, and I just—I don’t know. Why don’t I ever think? I really need to think more—“ He scrubbed a hand through his tangled, flaxen hair, clearly exasperated with himself. The embarrassment was prevalent through his every word. He didn’t even look at her, too caught up in berating himself.

 

Uzi swallowed hard, her chest tight. She hated seeing him twist himself up like this—like he was the only one who had messed up. Her throat felt dry, but she forced herself to speak, dragging up every ounce of courage she could.

 

“I get it,” she muttered, her voice low but steady.

 

N’s attention snapped to her, his brows knitting, tone softer but uncertain. “What do you mean?”

 

Uzi hesitated, arms folding tightly across her chest. She slumped back again into her seat with dull thud and a sharp exhale, trying to find the words. Her eyes flicked down to the floor, then sideways at him, before she gave up pretending she wasn’t flustered and just let it out.

 

“It’s harder to think,” she admitted, her tone more pointed than she meant, though the vulnerability underneath betrayed her. Her lips pressed into a thin line, but once she started, she couldn’t stop. “Like… when I’m with you, everything else just—” she made a vague gesture with her hand, searching for the word, “—drops out. It’s like the rest of the world stops existing.”

 

She sighed again, frustration and embarrassment warring inside her. Her arms tightened against her chest as though she could physically hold in the feelings threatening to spill over. “And it’s so stupid. And weird. I’ve never—” she stressed the word, glaring down at the floor as though daring it to argue, “—been like this with anyone else. Ever. I know I’ve said that a few times before, but it’s just, like—…Even the very select of other drones I’ve liked before, even the one I kind of had… something with…” Her voice faltered then, softer now, tinged with disbelief that she had actually confessed all of that. She finally turned to glance at him, meeting his gaze for just a heartbeat before looking away again. “…it was never like this.” 

 

Her chest rose and fell unevenly, and she hated how exposed she felt, like she had just peeled back her entire chest plate and left her core in his hands. And yet—buried under all that embarrassment—was a strange relief at voicing that aloud.

 

N didn’t answer right away. The weight of her confession seemed to hang in the air, and Uzi could almost see him sorting through it—processing, hesitating, choosing his words. His silence made her itch with self-consciousness, and she dragged a hand down her face, groaning softly under her breath. Her fingers pressed against her eye as though she could rub away the embarrassment that still burned there.

 

Finally, N spoke, his tone careful, almost uncertain. “I… feel the same way,” he admitted, voice subdued.

 

Uzi froze, her gaze shifting towards him without moving her head. She tried to look unbothered, but her chest betrayed her with a quick, sharp rise of air. She stayed silent on purpose, waiting, hoping he’d keep talking. And, predictably, he did.

 

“It’s like…” N hesitated, his hand twitching once against his leg before he flattened it against his knee. “Like you said—everyone else just disappears. Every time I’m around you—…” his words faltered, and he glanced away, brow furrowing as though searching for the right phrasing.

 

He went quiet again for a beat, then added, more tentatively, “And… also, like—every time I look at you, I start thinking about a lot of… things. And then I can’t focus on anything else.”

 

That snagged her attention. Uzi blinked, frowning slightly, unsure of what he meant by that. She angled her head toward him at last, eyes narrowing with a trace of suspicion. “What… things?” she asked, her voice edged with both curiosity and a silent plea that he wasn’t going to say something weird.

 

N blinked back at her, his smile faltering, eyes widening like he’d just realized how his words sounded. He raised both hands slightly, palms out in defense, stammering. “I worded that terribly. I didn’t—uh—I’m not trying to be… y’know, creepy or—” He cut himself off with a sheepish laugh, the kind that came out nervous and too thin, like he was trying to brush off his own awkwardness. 

 

Uzi arched a brow at him, unimpressed but not hostile. A small huff left her before she continued, “Uh-huh. Then what do you mean, exactly?”

 

Her tone was pointed, but underneath it all, her curiosity was genuine. Her processor spun with possibilities, her stomach tightening in that frustrating, fluttery way she hated. She didn’t want to care about his answer this much… and yet, she found herself holding her breath for it. 

 

N’s gaze flicked toward her, then darted away just as quickly, like the simple act of looking her in the eye was too much. His hands fidgeted in his lap, fingertips tapping together in a nervous rhythm before he finally forced himself to glance back at her.

 

His voice dropped lower than before, a quiet murmur that carried the weight of a confession. “I hope this doesn’t sound weird—It’s just… every time I look at you, I want to—” he hesitated, cheeks tinged a hue of pink with embarrassment, “—hug you. And kiss you. And hold you. Stuff like that. I know it probably sounds… ‘cheesy,’ like you always say. But—”

 

His voice faltered as though the words cost him something to admit, sinking into a softer register that almost got swallowed up by the low hum of the train.

 

Uzi froze, her mind short-circuiting for a moment under the bluntness of his honesty. Her mouth opened like she might say something, but no sound came out. Her face burned hotter than she wanted to admit, and for she couldn’t quite meet his eyes, trying her best to process what he just said and think of a response. 

 

But N didn’t give her the chance to answer. He stumbled forward with more words, blurting in a rush, “I’ll try to cut back on the PDA, though. Even if it’s… hard. I’ll be more careful from now on, I promise.” His shoulders slumped slightly, his tone apologetic.

 

Uzi blinked, still processing. She was rattled—his directness had knocked the wind out of her. But beneath that, layered and confusing, was something enamored. Something that admitted she wasn’t exactly opposed to the things he’d just said. Her mind wanted to label it ‘corny,’ like she always seemed to default to; to call him ridiculous and move on. Yet, deep down, she couldn’t deny she felt the same pull toward him—maybe not with the same shameless openness, but it was there all the same.

 

The only difference was, though, for her it wasn’t like every glance in his direction sparked some overwhelming urge to hug or hold or kiss him, like he apparently did. Did he seriously mean that was all he thought about when he looked at her?! 

 

The guy was a hopeless romantic—clingy, affectionate to a fault. The kind of drone she once would’ve rolled her eyes at and sworn she’d never be able to tolerate, or even want to associate herself with. And yet, here she was, not just tolerating it but secretly drinking it in. 

 

At the same time, though… he gave her more attention than she knew what to do with. Sometimes it pressed down on her, overwhelming in its intensity. She didn’t know how the hell she would handle this, and if he started being like this more often like he seemed to be, especially today for whatever reason—really touchy, affectionate, clingy—she didn’t know what she would do. Honestly, she was worried that at some point, she’d start feeling so smothered that she’d ask him for space. But she didn’t want to distance herself from him—she knew the second she did, she’d miss the attention—was that a bad thing? And on that topic, it wasn’t like she was touch or attention-repulsed, not in the slightest—if anything, she was the opposite. Attention and touch-starved. Though she’d rather fry her circuits than say that out loud. 

 

Then his earlier words caught up with her.

 

‘…I’ll try to cut back on the PDA…’ 

 

Uzi’s eyes widened slightly as the term settled in her mind, and she drew in a slow, silent breath to steady herself before daring to respond.

 

She turned her head just enough to look at him out of the corner of her eye, her tone flat but edged with incredulity. “So… that’s what you’re calling it?” 

 

N paused, uncertainty flickering across his face. His sheepish smile faltered as if he wasn’t sure if he’d said something stupid. “Huh…?” He asked, voice soft but unsure.

 

“When you said…” she continued, her brow raising, PDA.” 

 

N blinked once, then again, confusion breaking through his bashfulness. His mouth opened, then closed, his expression shifting like he hadn’t even fully considered what he was saying at the time. “…Oh.” His voice was soft, almost baffled, as if the weight of the word only hit him now.

 

Uzi folded her arms loosely again, relaxing back in her seat, studying him with a mixture of exasperation and reluctant amusement. Inside, though, her thoughts were tangled—half embarrassed at the label, half wondering why the thought of him even calling it that made her heart kick against her ribs.

 

Starting to feel awkward, she unfolded her arms, before rubbing the heels of her hands over her face exasperatedly, “Robo-God…” she muttered under her breath, something half-laughed and half-sour, “We seriously must look like a couple.” The words felt absurd and horribly exposed the instant they left her mouth.

 

For a heartbeat she thought she’d imagined it—a flicker across N’s features like a shadow—but no, something like disappointment crossed his face, brief and almost guilty. He blinked, hustled a small, hesitant laugh out of his chest, the sound almost half a cough. “Yeah…” he said, forcing the single syllable into something casual, but Uzi knew it was anything but.

 

Silence settled after that, the kind that wasn’t heavy enough to crush them but thin enough to make every small noise overly loud: the scrape of a seat, distant chatter.

 

Uzi folded her arms tighter and stared at the scuffed and dirty floor, willing her pulse to slow.

 

Then N leaned in a fraction, voice suddenly uncertain. “Hey—earlier, you said… you had something with another drone? What did you… mean by that?” He watched her, eyes searching, tone careful when he placed his question.

 

Oh, shit. 

Notes:

Two hopeless idiots in love, one with attachment issues and one with commitment issues. What could possibly go wrong?

Sorry for the cliffhanger ending 🤧 honestly, though, I was gonna make this chapter a lot shorter, cuz I was gonna end it after that one random lady insulted them and js walked away 💔 LMAO the idea struck me so I absolutely had to follow through with it. I imagine that lady recently went through a divorce and has a terrible love life, and then on the subway she sees these two random ass teenagers basically cuddling?! 😭 she didn’t have to take her anger out on them though- but I don’t think it’s unrealistic, unfortunately, cuz people will say shit like that. I haven’t personally experience something in *that* context, but strangers are so rude sometimes, gtfo 💔 that ladies js salty and needs to get over it 🙄

OH also, hopefully this doesn’t seem like, “oh that’s repetitive cuz didn’t Uzi get all butthurt at N when she found out he used to be close with someone 🤓☝️” JUST YOU WAIT, for one, COMPLETELY different context. And I might as well tell yall two things: one, N isn’t mad at Uzi abt it, cuz he doesn’t jump to conclusions like her (sorry Uzi it’s js a fact 💔 that’s even cannon too, like during that whole mineshaft scene where Uzi gets all dramatic cuz Tessa implied she wanted to kill Uzi, but then N LITERALLY said ‘we’re *not* gonna hurt her,’ but Uzi was js like ‘ur gonna hurt me? 🥺’ and then all those fucking rocks fall between them and N screams and stuff LMAO 😭 on a real note though that scene made me so sad 🥲) ANYWAYS sorry for getting side tracked- and for TWO, it’s not gonna be a super long, in depth, complex lowkey traumatic story this time. It’s not really that deep tbh and I even literally mentioned it directly once before (idk how long ago that was, but if u figure it out props to u ig.)

But yeah fun! Can’t wait for that conversation 😃👍

And also I’ll say this scene on the subway train isn’t gonna stretch for like 4 chapters 😭. It’ll literally js be the next chapter before they get off it. Don’t think that’s a spoiler cuz that’s pretty easy to assume.

Next chapter should have a solid amount of dialogue, probs more than this one. And I already started writing it to, cuz initially I was gonna make the entire conversation and then when they get off the train in one chapter, but I didn’t have the time, so here yall go cuz I don’t wanna keep yall waiting when I literally have a good amount completely done.

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

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EDIT: Fun fact - when I was about to post this chapter I accidentally clicked the cancel button and thought I lost all my editing so it literally took every fiber of my being to hold back a scream. But thankfully the like, previous tab button or wtv exist, cuz I js spammed it until I came back to this.

Thought I might as well tell yall because that was the most pure dread and terror I’ve felt in months 💔

EDIT 2: Okay, so I think it deleted some of the other stuff I said when the whole incident I mentioned above happened, or I hallucinated that I wrote more LMAO. SO pretty much the only other thing I had wrote (or meant to write ig) was that I’m gonna post the next chapter Thursday- Friday at the latest. There was some other stuff I said abt the chapter but I don’t remember 💔 sorry for not checking if it deleted or wtv 🤧

EDIT 3: I lied (not on purpose I promise 😭) got *extremely* busy today cuz something came up that I didn’t know abt in advance, so I haven’t had any time to finish editing the chapter and post it. SO I’ll be posting it tomorrow, but like, actually… really sorry 🙂‍↕️ (also idk if what I said here in this edit thing makes sense cuz I’m super frickin tired rn, so I’ll come back tomorrow and change up any wording it if it’s unclear. Thought I might as well say that 💔)

EDIT like, five thousand atp 💀: FUCK okay. SO I actually have the chapter done, but don’t have the time to post it cuz it’s like the middle of the night and I need to frickin sleep 💔 I KNOW I KNOW I promise I have a great explanation for the hold up on this. BUT again the chapter is actually done so without a doubt I will be posting it tomorrow. Don’t wanna half-ass it while I’m tired cuz then I’ll fuck up a bunch of the grammar and italics 🙂‍↕️ oh and this next chapter is relatively long too and I think yall will like it a lot! 🤧

Chapter 98: The Subway

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi froze. 

 

For a moment, she considered pretending she had no idea what he was talking about, acting like she had said nothing at all—scoffing, deflecting, or maybe pretending the comment had been a joke—but the memory stuck to the walls of her skull like gum, and she couldn’t quite get rid of. The idea of lying felt cheap, and she wasn’t sure she had the energy to make it convincing.

 

But then, at the same time… when she had found out about him being close with another drone in the past, she hadn’t been as calm and collected as he was being right now. She’d overreacted… majorly.

 

The reminder of yesterday gnawed at her even as she sat there, arms folded tight across her chest like she was holding herself together.

 

Because she had jumped to conclusions, because she didn’t stop to think, the jealousy she had felt been ugly, bitter, and in hindsight… it was so unfair. She still felt residual guilt from it—knowing now how wrong she’d been, how much she’d let the hurt warp her judgment. Even if the situation was solved now, it was still so fresh that she hadn’t processed it entirely.

 

But now here she was again—only this time, the roles were reversed. Completely different story, yet the same, anxious pit in her chest.

 

After everything… the least she could do for him was be honest.

 

Uzi shifted, shoulders straightening as if bracing for a blow. She dragged in a quiet breath, forcing down the flutter of nerves clogging her throat. Finally, she tilted her head toward him, her voice steady but unintentionally subdued, “Do you… really want to know?”

 

N blinked at her, caught between curiosity and unease. His expression was careful, like he was worried that if he moved too quickly, the delicate words between them would break into pieces. She could see the hesitation flicker in his eyes—but also something softer, something that looked like patience.

 

He gave the smallest nod, deliberate and slow, as if to show her he wasn’t demanding, only listening. His hands shifted in his lap, fingers tapping against his knees, the nervous motion betraying the calm face he was trying to put on.

 

Uzi’s stomach churned, her resolve trembling under the weight of that quiet gesture. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust him. It was that saying it aloud meant admitting it had been real—and she wasn’t sure she wanted to remember it.

 

She sat stiffly, nails digging into her sleeves as she stared down at the scratched, gray floor beneath her boots. The silence pressed heavy, each second stretching like an eternity until she finally forced herself to break it. Her voice came out halting, uneven. “…Are you sure you’re… okay with me talking about this?”

 

N’s head tilted slightly and blinked at her, perplexity crossing his features as though he couldn’t understand why she was asking permission.

That bewildered look almost made her want to drop it right there, but she pushed on, her words spilling out before she lost her nerve. “Because when I found out about you…” Her tone cracked slightly, and she let out a shaky sigh, her hands tightening around her own arms. “I freaked out. Or—whatever. I didn’t… handle it right. At all.” 

 

The memory from yesterday tasted bitter when spoken aloud, shame lacing her every syllable. Her gaze darted sideways, catching the barely there flicker in his eyes as if he wanted to speak up, but she steamrolled ahead, not ready for him to cut in.

 

“And now…” Uzi’s voice dropped to almost a mumble, the admission dragging out of her like it was hooked on her ribs. “I… get why you were so confused. I didn’t once stop to think about it from your side.” She shook her head once, almost imperceptibly, lips curling in a humorless laugh that had no warmth to it. “You probably hadn’t even thought about your past… whatever in forever. Because it’s not relevant anymore. So why would you?” She hugged herself tighter, feeling like she was shrinking further into her seat with every word.

 

Her throat felt tight when she added, quieter, almost like the words were meant only for her: “I was so dumb for not even trying to see it from your perspective.” 

 

Uzi kept her eyes fixed firmly on the floor, not daring to look at him, not ready to see how he might be looking back at her. All she could feel was the heat of her own embarrassment crawling up her neck, a suffocating reminder of how badly she’d fumbled yesterday.

 

After a long, drawn out moment, she risked a sideways glance at him, bracing herself for… she didn’t even know what. Some hint that he wished she’d stop dredging this up? Instead, what she found she hadn’t entirely expected.

 

N’s expression wasn’t sharp or defensive—it was steady, calm, his gaze fixed on her with a kind of quiet attentiveness that made her chest tighten. He wasn’t smiling, but he wasn’t frowning either. He was simply listening, like every word she said carried weight. He cared. And she knew it. 

 

When he finally spoke, his voice was gentle, not rushed, not edged with judgment. “It’s okay. You can say whatever you need to. I’m not going to hold it against you.”

 

Her fingers flexed around her sleeves, a fresh sting of guilt prickling deep in her core. He meant it—she could tell. There wasn’t even a small trace of impatience in his tone. He was just… patient. As always. Steady in a way she couldn’t imagine herself ever being. 

 

It made her feel small in comparison. She was always quick to leap to conclusions, arming herself with jealousy and fear, lashing out because it was easier than admitting she was hurt.

 

Meanwhile, he was handling thisherwith such disarming calm. She hated that she almost envied him for it. 

 

Maybe it wasn’t even about him being stronger—maybe it was about her needing to do better. To stop flinching at every shadow and assuming the worst. She tucked that thought away, the quiet admission pressing into her mind like a reminder she’d have to face later. 

 

For now, though, she found herself strangely grateful—for his restraint, his patience, and the way he didn’t make her feel foolish for spilling her thoughts aloud.

 

Uzi let the back of her head fall against the cool glass of the window, the faint vibration of the train humming through it. She nearly folded her hands in her lap, gently brushing her thumb against the pack of her other hand as a low sigh slipped out. “Where do I even start…?” she muttered, somewhat exasperated and half to herself.

 

To her mild surprise, N’s voice came less than a beat later. “Maybe… the beginning?” he offered, placid, almost tentative.

 

If anyone else had said that, it wouldn’t have been sincere. But since it was N, there wasn’t a shred of sarcasm in his tone—no teasing jab, no smirk lurking behind the words. Just an honest suggestion. And somehow, that simplicity steadied her more than she expected. 

 

“…Yeah,” Uzi murmured, the corner of her mouth twitching as if she were almost amused by the obviousness of it. “That makes sense.”

 

She hummed softly, tapping her thumb against her sleeve as she pulled at the first thread of memory. “It was middle school. Same place I went with Thad.” The hint of a smile tugged at her lips, though it carried an edge of something heavier. That memory should’ve been ordinary, harmless. But the way she’d been torn away from it all so abruptly—before the year had even ended—gave it a bittersweet sting.

 

N didn’t interrupt, he only just barely nodded, his eyes never leaving her. He had that same forbearing, listening look he always wore when she started unraveling.

 

Uzi let out a small breath before continuing. “I met Thad in sixth grade. But it wasn’t until seventh that I met… her.

 

Uzi’s teeth pressed sharply into the inside of her cheek the moment the word slipped out.

 

Her. 

 

It was too late to take it back, and instantly, she wished she could. Not because of what it meant, but because of how N’s face shifted the second he registered it.

 

He didn’t look angry, not even remotely. Instead, his expression cracked open into bewilderment, like she’d just spoken in a language he’d never heard before. His eyes widened slightly, and he repeated the word under his breath, “Her?” It was drawn out in the shape of a question, heavy with surprise.

 

Uzi’s chest tightened, her face falling fast. “I—uh—” she stammered, words tangling in her throat. Heat prickled across her face, and she turned her gaze toward the floor as if avoiding his eyes might somehow rewind time.

 

N’s mouth opened like he was about to say something—probably an apology for reacting that way—but Uzi jumped in first, desperate to fill the silence before it could spiral. Her hand shot up to the back of her neck, rubbing nervously as she muttered, “Right. Guess I… never mentioned that to you, huh.”

 

When she finally looked back at him, she caught the panic flickering across his features. He looked frantic now, like he was scrambling to undo whatever damage his surprise might’ve caused. His lips parted again, but before he could get a word out, Uzi blurted over him, hands waving quickly in front of her. “Don’t—don’t worry about it, okay?! I still like guys and all that!” The words tumbled out fast, too defensive, too rehearsed. “It’s not like I’ve ever actually been in a relationship with a girl!” 

 

The moment the words left her, her brain decided to kick her in the face. “...I mean, I haven’t been in one with a dude either, but—ugh, that’s not the point!” She groaned, burying her face in her hands for a second before peeking at him through her fingers. “You get what I mean, right?” 

 

Her voice had that desperate edge to it, like she was trying way too hard to make it sound casual, when inside she was screaming at herself for how awkwardly she’d handled it.

 

N blinked slowly, almost like he was still processing, before his voice slipped out—soft, hesitant. “…Sorry.” His brows pinched together, the corners of his mouth tugging down as though he regretted every second of how he’d reacted. “I shouldn’t have made that face. I just—” he gave a small, sheepish shrug, looking briefly away before forcing himself to meet her eyes again—“I didn’t expect it, that’s all.”

 

He fidgeted ever so slightly, his fingers worrying against each other, before he steadied himself enough to continue. His tone was firmer this time, like he wanted to be sure she believed him. “But… it doesn’t bother me. Even if you had been with a… girl—…it’s not like that would upset me. That’s your business, not mine.” His gaze held hers with a quiet sincerity, nothing judgmental, nothing hesitant anymore.

 

Uzi blinked, caught off guard by how easily he said it. That sinking, tight feeling in her chest loosened just a little, though the awkwardness still lingered, bristling at her circuits. She dragged a hand across her face, half hiding her expression, unsure what she was supposed to say to that.

 

Because now that she was thinking about it… had she ever told anyone else? Like, flat out said she liked girls? Not that she could remember… The one girl she was about to tell him about didn’t count—duh, they’d both known. It was mutual, unspoken and obvious. But other than that? No. 

 

The pit in her stomach stirred as a thought struck her. Did her dad know? He couldn’t, right…? He definitely didn’t know. Robo-god, she couldn’t even imagine trying to have that conversation with him. Even if he didn’t freak out and he was okay with it, it would be the most unbearably awkward thing in the world. She’d rather self-destruct than sit through his stilted attempts at being ‘understanding.’

 

She dug her fingers into her velour sleeves, trying to steady herself. Her thoughts spun, tugging her further away from the present.

 

What about Thad, did he ever know…?

 

Maybe. She couldn’t say for sure, because she didn’t remember if she had told him back in middle school. Probably not, though, knowing herself. If he had been paying close enough attention back in middle school, he probably could’ve picked up on her not-so-subtle gawking at certain girls. But this was Thadand not to talk down on him, but in middle school he had been, well… kind of an idiot. Like most middle school boys. He definitely hadn’t been actively looking for signs like that, and was too dull to notice any.

 

And besides, even if he had rather noticed something, Thad didn’t know about her. The one who actually mattered in this story. That secret had been hers alone. 

Overall, it just felt strange, realizing she was actually saying this out loud for the first time—to N, of all drones. And yet… instead of judgment, she was met with patience. Acceptance. That thought was both grounding and terrifying. It was so hard to get used to this… 

 

Uzi gave the tiniest shake of her head, as if she could rattle her own brain into silence. Dwelling on the what-ifs wasn’t going to get her anywhere. She needed to just… tell him everything. Start talking.

 

She let out a shallow, awkward laugh that sounded thinner than she wanted it to. “That… actually makes me feel a little better,” she admitted finally, her voice more sheepish than she would’ve liked.

 

N gave her that patient, listening look again, his eyes soft but searching. The silence between them stretched, fragile but not suffocating. Then, in his gentle, almost uncertain way, he broke it with just one word. “So…?”

 

The simplicity of it hit her hard. No pressure, no prying—just a nudge. An invitation to keep going if she wanted.

 

Uzi nodded once, a stiff little motion, but her mind felt just a fraction clearer. She drew in a breath, steadying herself, and reminded herself that she’d already chosen to tell him this. She couldn’t stop now.

 

“Right,” Uzi answered, mentally preparing herself for what she would say next. She drew in a slow breath, her voice carrying the weight of someone dragging words up from places she’d rather leave buried. “As I was saying… we met in seventh grade,” her eyes flicked beside her briefly at N before drifting off again.

 

“We had this art class together.” Her tone softened, almost reluctant, as if the memory itself was pulling her into it whether she wanted to go or not. “We started talking after she… complimented one of my drawings.” Her fingers toyed restlessly with the edge of her sleeve while she spoke, the nervous gestures betraying her discomfort. “She liked drawing too. We were into the same kind of music, same TV shows, video games. All that kinda stuff. And she dressed super cool, too…” Uzi’s words faltered, her gaze dropping to her lap. A shy, unbidden smile tugged at her lips—gone in the next second, like she’d caught herself in the act of remembering too fondly.

 

She pressed on, her voice steadier now, though quieter. “Eventually, we… kind of admitted we liked each other. Just once. It came up, we said it… and then we never brought it up again.” Her tone carried a strange mix of warmth and detachment, like she wasn’t sure whether to treasure the memory or to bury it deeper.

 

Inside, she felt the familiar ache of nostalgia pulling at her chest, sharp enough that she had to force her shoulders not to slump. It wasn’t painful exactly, but uncomfortable—like reopening a page of a book she hadn’t planned to revisit.

 

N stayed silent, his eyes fixed on her, giving her space to speak but making it clear he was listening to every word. That, in itself, only made her more aware of how vulnerable this felt.

 

Uzi’s voice dipped lower as she pushed herself to keep going. “After that, it was just… this unspoken thing between us.” Her hands flexed slightly in her lap, as though they remembered the feeling. “We’d hold hands sometimes. And—” she hesitated, her throat tightening, “we kissed. Once.”

She cut herself off with a sharp exhale, eyes darting away like the word itself had betrayed her. “Not really a kiss, though,” she added quickly, her tone defensive, almost dismissive. “It was just a peck. Behind the school, when we were leaving one day. I didn’t even see it coming—she made the first move. I just… stood there. Like an idiot.”


Her voice faltered, trailing off. She resisted the urge to touch her lips, though her fingers twitched as if tempted. The memory, though years old, remained sharp—so vivid it left a strange, worming feeling in her chest. 

 

When she finally looked back at N, his face was open, unreadable but attentive. He blinked once, then gave her a small nod, a silent confirmation that he was still with her. Then, hesitantly, he asked, “…Did something happen between you two?”

 

The question made her stiffen immediately. Her arms then folded across her chest, trying to protect against the sudden vulnerability pressing down on her. She drew in a breath through her nose, then let it out in a weary sigh. “Kinda,” she muttered. “Not between us. Everything with her was… fine. Great, even.” 

 

Her eyes dropped, voice faltering as the next words caught in her throat. “Until… my mom died. And I moved away.”

 

The admission left a heavy silence between them, Uzi staring at her lap, her jaw tight. She felt the weight of that memory slam into her chest all over again, raw and uninvited, making her wish she could vanish into the seat.

 

A silent moment passed before N’s voice cut through, careful but steady. “Did you two ever talk again after that?”

 

Uzi’s shoulders slumped as if the weight of the question itself pushed down on her. She gave her head a sharp shake, muttering, “Nope. Just like with Thad—we lost contact. Never spoke again.” Her tone carried a bitter edge, though it was directed more at herself than anything else. “Well… I guess Thad doesn’t really count anymore, since we obviously met again—that makes it different.”

 

Her jaw clenched, teeth pressing into the inside of her cheek. “But her…” Uzi trailed off, eyes fixed on a scratched, heart-shaped engraving in the seat. The word carried more weight than she wanted it to. “We’ll probably never speak again. And I don’t plan on reaching out. Ever.” 

 

N tilted his head slightly, the concern plain in his expression. His voice was soft, careful. “Why not?”

 

The question stung sharper than she would’ve wanted it to. Uzi blinked at him, her brows furrowing together. He didn’t mean it like a challenge—she could tell that instantly. There wasn’t an ounce of criticalness in his face, only curiosity laced with that same steady patience he always gave her. But still, it burrowed harshly under her plating.

 

She bounced her leg anxiously on the ball of her foot. Why not? She hadn’t let herself wander that far. She never asked why, never wanted to. That whole almost-but-not-quite-relationship was something she’d shoved into the farthest corner of her mind, told herself it didn’t matter anymore. 

 

Except… it did. It always had.

 

Her stomach twisted, her mouth dry. She tried to convince herself it wasn’t important—that digging it back up now wouldn’t change anything. But N’s question lingered, demanding an answer she didn’t have.

 

Uzi eventually let out a shaky sigh and shrugged, her arms still folded close to her chest. “I… don’t know,” she admitted, her voice suddenly feeble—vulnerable, even. Her gaze drifted toward the window straight across from her, not to stare at the rushing-past concrete walls, it was as if to hide in the blur of motion. “I don’t think about it. And even if I tried, I just… can’t bring myself to do it.”

 

The honesty, especially about this topic, the one she’d never confided in anyone about before, felt foreign on her tongue. For a second, she wondered if she should’ve stopped there—left it vague, moved on. But the thought barely had time to settle before another one tumbled out of her mouth, raw and impulsive.

 

“Besides… I have you now. So why should it matter?”

 

N blinked, stunned into silence. His brows lifted slightly, like he was trying to process the weight of her words. Then, slowly, his features softened. A shy smile crept onto his face, small but warm, and his gaze flickered down before returning to her with a quiet intensity.

 

“I’m glad I have you, too,” he murmured.

 

Uzi’s chest tightened, heat spreading through her circuits. Against her will, a faint smile tugged at the corners of her mouth—hesitant at first, but real. She found herself staring back at him, caught by the way his eyes seemed to hold her in place. There was something in them she hadn’t noticed until now; a kind of yearning, unspoken but impossible to ignore.

 

Her breath caught, heart pounding louder in her ears than the low hum of the train. She thought maybe he was going to say something else, or maybe she was—she wasn’t even sure anymore.

 

But before either of them could speak, the train began to slow. The shift in momentum pulled her slightly to the side in her seat, jolting her from the moment. The brakes hissed, the cars rattling as the motion bled away. Uzi blinked rapidly, not startled exactly, but jarred all the same. She realized with a rush of embarrassment that she’d been so absorbed in talking with N, she’d completely forgotten that this train trip didn’t last forever.

 

As soon as the train jolted to its final stop, half the passengers practically sprang from their seats, pressing toward the doors even before they even had the chance to open. The din of chatter and clattering footsteps filled the car, and Uzi lips pressed to a thin line at the impatient shuffle of drones bunching up in the aisle.

 

She shifted her gaze back to N and gave him a small nudge with her elbow. “We should go,” she groused dryly. “Unless you wanna get trampled.”

 

N let out a soft laugh, his shoulders relaxing a little at her teasing. “Fair point. Alright.”

 

Uzi pushed herself up first, brushing imaginary dust from her pants before edging into the crowded aisle. N followed close behind, carefully maneuvering around any poles as they squeezed toward the back of the forming crowd. The volume didn’t lessen, but instead intensified—everyone talking over each other, footsteps clanging against the rough floor, obnoxious music played on a speaker in the distance. 

 

As they inched forward, N leaned toward her, his voice raised just enough to carry over the noise. “Where do you think this train even dropped us?”

 

Uzi shrugged, casual, her hands stuffed in her pockets. “No clue. Guess we’ll find out.”

 

When she flicked a glance up at him, she caught the faint look of concern across his face and the way his smile faltered. Something about her answer had unsettled him.

 

“You good?” she asked, tilting her head slightly, studying him.

 

N blinked, like he hadn’t expected her to notice. He quickly shook his head, but his eyes betrayed a flicker of worry. “No—yeah, I’m fine. The only thing is…” He trailed off, then admitted with a sheepish look, “What if we can’t figure out where we are? I… really don’t want to get lost.”

 

Uzi’s mouth pulled upward into a faint smirk, though her tone wasn’t mocking—just matter-of-fact. “Relax. There’s probably a map on a wall somewhere. And even if there’s not…” she tapped the side of her pocket meaningfully, “we’ve got phones. Not exactly rocket science.”

 

That seemed to click with him. N’s expression softened, and he gave a small nod, exhaling like a weight had been lifted. “Right–…Yeah. Should’ve thought of that.”

 

“It’s alright,” Uzi said briskly with a shrug, her voice clipped but not unkind.

 

The train doors hissed open before she could add more, and the crowd surged forward in a tide of shuffling footsteps and muffled voices. Uzi glanced at N, then jerked her head toward the exit. “C’mon, let’s go.”

 

He nodded, and before she even take a step forward—…she felt the brush of his hand against hers.

 

For a heartbeat, her chest lurched—like every nerve in her fingers had lit up at once. As much as she wanted to curl her hand around his and not let go, that woman’s voice from earlier rang in her ears. Lovebirds like you make me sick. The reminder made her stomach churn, and her mouth ran dry. The idea of being seen like that—of what it meant—was beyond terrifying for her.

 

Almost without realizing it, she pulled her hand back.

 

N froze mid-step, his eyes widening as the realization struck him. He gave a barely there, apologetic smile, his voice rushed and uneven. “Sorry—sorry, I wasn’t thinking.” 

 

Uzi bit the inside of her cheek, forcing herself not to glance down at her hand again. Because the truth was, it hadn’t felt wrong. It hadn’t felt forced or awkward. N hadn’t weighed the idea or questioned it—he’d just reached for her, as if it were as natural as breathing. The thought made something warm coil in her chest, even as she tried to suppress it… for now.

 

She drew in a quiet breath, steadied herself, and managed, “Don’t worry about it. I’m not upset.”

 

N blinked at her, searching her face, and she caught the way his shoulders eased when he saw she meant it. The corner of his mouth tugged upward in something close to relief.

 

“Just follow me,” Uzi said then, her tone lighter, like she was deliberately steering them forward before things got heavier.

 

His smile grew a fraction more genuine, and he dipped his head in a nod. “Of course. I’ll be right behind you.”

 

Uzi felt her pulse steady again as they merged with the crowd, though she couldn’t shake the echo of his hand brushing against hers.

 

She pushed forward, weaving through the sea of bodies spilling out from the subway. Her boots hit the platform with a hollow thud as she stepped onto concrete again, the faint sound of it nearly drowned out by the racket of countless voices and footsteps.

 

The station stretched on endlessly, a long corridor of concrete walls and harsh fluorescent lighting, every set of train doors releasing its own wave of passengers.

 

The sheer number of them was overwhelming—far more than she had expected. She kept her head low, shoulders tucked slightly inward, letting herself be carried with the current while her eyes roamed. Drones of every sort shuffled around her, some in a rush, some dragging their feet, others clearly just existing in their own odd ways.

 

A sharp splash of neon orange caught her attention—the same drone from earlier, the one in the Hawaiian shirt, who was clutching a brown briefcase like it was a lifeline. He brushed past her without so much as a glance. A little further off, she caught sight of a drone with robotic cat ears and a tail, the movements stiff and awkward, but oddly convincing at first glance. Another passed by with a shock of bright blue hair that almost hurt to look at, so artificial it seemed more plastic than fiber.

 

For a moment, Uzi let herself get pulled into observing them. It was easier than thinking, easier than wrestling with the knot in her stomach from earlier. The crowd became a blur of colors and sounds, and she zoned out, her mind wandering while her feet carried her forward on autopilot.

 

It wasn’t until she glanced over her shoulder that reality hit her.

 

Her heart dropped in her chest. 

 

The space directly behind her was empty. 

 

She blinked once, then twice—quick and disbelieving, scanning left, then right. Nothing. Her stomach plummeted, an icy weight crashing through her gut. She stopped walking altogether, and a few drones lightly bumped against her shoulders as they flowed around her, muttering in irritation when she didn’t move. 

 

N wasn’t there.

 

Her pulse spiked, the sound of her heartbeat rushing in her ears louder than the entire crowd. She turned her head sharply, eyes darting through the tide of unfamiliar faces, but there was no flash of platinum, messy hair; no glow of vibrant yellow eyes searching for her.

 

Uzi’s chest constricted, panic snapping through her like a live wire. Where the hell is he?! He was right there—he couldn’t have gone far! The thought repeated like a glitching loop, but no matter how frantically she scanned the shifting mass of drones, she didn’t see him. Just more strangers. More noise. More bodies pressing and moving around her, none of them the one she needed to see. 

 

Her breaths quickened, shallow and uneven, as if the oxygen in the subway had been siphoned away. The harder she tried to steady herself, the more frayed her composure became. She murmured a desperate, broken, ”No, no, no…” under her breath, so quiet it was almost swallowed by the uproar of voices and shuffling feet. Once more, her wide eyes darted left, then right, then left again, every glimpse of another unfamiliar face tightening the dreadful knot in her chest. 

 

The crowd blurred together, oppressive in its sameness—just an endless stream of drones moving without care, without noticing her. She stood frozen among them, motionless while the world churned on.

 

A shoulder slammed into hers, harder than any previous ones. The impact was sharp enough to make her stumble half a step. 

 

“Move it, kid,” a drone barked without looking back. 

 

Uzi’s hand clutched her shoulder instinctively. It hadn’t been hurt, but the roughness of it made her jolt like she’d been struck. Her throat felt constrained, and the edges of her vision prickled hotly. Her eyes burned, though she refused to let tears fall—not here, not now. She wasn’t sad. She wasn’t weak. She was just… completely overwhelmed, nerves stretched so thin she felt like she might split open. 

 

Her hands trembled as she forced herself to focus. The tide of drones was shifting—lessening. The station began to thin out as the stragglers either boarded again or drifted off toward stairwells and side halls. The noise dulled, pockets of space forming where moments ago she’d been crushed on every side.

 

But that relief didn’t reach her.

 

Uzi remained rooted in the same spot, small and trembling, the emptiness around her making her feel even more exposed. Every second stretched like an eternity, her mind filling with sharp static as she waited, helpless and desperate, for literally any sign of N, for those bright, caring, definitely worried yellow eyes to cut through the crowd and find her. 

 

Please, N… where are you? 

 

Uzi finally took a couple steps back until the concrete pressed cold and solid against the heels of her boots. The station’s roar had thinned to a low rumble—the last stragglers funneling away, doors on the train at last sighing shut. Next came a eerie silence that made things snap into focus: a loose tile shifting underfoot, the buzz of a fluorescent light overhead, the whisper of wind that skated through the wide, open corridor, even underground.

 

She swept her eyes again and again from left to right, her gaze hunting for him, muscles tense and ready to push through any remaining crowd the second she caught sight of N.

 

Then, in the middle of her line of sight, something stopped her cold.

 

A single drone stood planted between her and the train, a broken troffer light flickering just barely in front of them. Every few seconds an exposed wire sparked, and a tiny, hungry yellow flash spattered the drone’s features in quicksilver.

 

They shouldn’t have been noticeable—there were dozens of sporadic faces in the station—but somehow, everything narrowed until that singular silhouette filled her vision.

 

For a moment, Uzi convinced herself the drone was merely delayed—maybe upset that the doors of the train had closed before they boarded, and now they stood there in defeat. 

 

Then she realized they weren’t facing away from her.

 

The drone’s head was turned in her direction. Not toward the station in general, not toward the now distant flow of bodies—directly at her. 

 

An uneasy heat knotted within her. She squinted—she still wasn’t entirely sure if her mind was playing tricks on her or not. The broken troffer made it hard to read details; the light snipped places into bright, then drowned them in shadow. But as the broken lamp sputtered, something else became horribly clear.

 

The drone’s mouth. 

 

A broad, toothy grin stretched across their face—too wide, too precise—teeth flashing like cut metal in the fitful light. It wasn’t a friendly smile—far from it. It was a menacing strip of white that widened slowly and deliberately—and even stranger were the teeth themselves. Way too sharp to be that of a normal drone. It looked like the mouth of a hungry predator, waiting eagerly to sink its teeth into its unsuspecting prey. 

 

Then, the train behind the drone groaned to life.

 

It emitted a long, metallic hiss, before pushing forward; the motion rushed past them with a sudden, violent gust. Uzi felt her hair sweep to the side as wind shoved at her and her jacket, even from this distance.

 

The pigtails of the drone in front of her snapped sideways like flags, flapping with the brief wind before falling back once the carriage had passed.

 

In that gust their grin split wider, and then, adding to Uzi’s foreboding sense of dread, the drone tilted their head—just a fraction, casual and deliberate—and gradually lifted a hand in a small, almost polite wave.

 

It didn’t take Uzi long to piece together the puzzle that was the identity of the drone in front of her. To her sheer and utter horror, it was obvious—and there was no way she could deny it.

 

It was J.

Notes:

HI GUYS sorry for the delay 🤧 I promise I have a good explanation, but it’s kinda depressing so I’ll bring it up later 🙂‍↕️

AHHH ANYWAYSSS what’d yall think of this chapter?!?! You have *no* idea how long I’ve been waiting to write this out. Idk when the New Ore City arc started (over a month ago now?? Idk) but when I was initially brainstorming it, I really loved the idea that J would confront Uzi in the subway- I js had to figure out how to get to this point, and like I thought the free day would be an absolutely *perfect* time for it. And like, I had the imagery in my brain of Uzi and J being face to face while the train rushes past them, and it’s js like, from Uzi’s POV all she sees is this menacing silhouette smiling with unnaturally sharp teeth in super dim flickering lighting, and like the train rushes past them both with a gust of wind and it’s js like super ominous

AHH I’m so glad I can finally talk abt this. And this isn’t even the best (and worst…) yet to come, if that makes sense.

I don’t think it was *as* good as I could’ve written it, but I don’t really have the brain power rn to go back and try to change it. Maybe I’ll add more details sometime in the future, maybe I'm won’t. Js depends on how I feel when I eventually read it again. But I think what I wrote suffices for now 🥲

icl, I actually wrote the vast majority of this entire chapter yesterday. I had a good chunk of the beginning written out, but like again wrote the rest over the span of like 2 hours yesterday 😭🤚

Ig I can explain now why I’m so late to posting- Ik this might be kinda dumb to bring up but might as well. Pretty much on like, Wednesday, I found out abt the whole d4vd situation going on, and it’s really been fucking with me bro. (If u don’t know what I’m talking abt u could look it up. In short, a popular singer *for sure* did and also allegedly did some super terrible things. I’ll spare the details because it’s abhorrent) The reason it’s affected me sm is cuz I’ve been a huge fan of his for *years*, and was planning on going to one of his concerts and also was gonna buy his vinyl’s and merch and other crap like that soon once I could afford it. Like this dude was sort of an idol for me and I literally know people who know him 😭 (not on a personal level but still- he even went to the school one of my friends went to at one point 🙂‍↕️) so I was really looking forward to hopefully meeting him at a concert and getting a photo w/ him or som like that 🤧 and his music has helped me through processing a lot of shit I was going through at one point, so like come to find out that a lot of those songs I loved were written abt a literal kid he was “dating” is seriously bothering me 🫤 among the other shit that happened.
Was super unmotivated and js felt really fucking weird after that so I didn’t do shit for like 3 days 😭

BUT I js kinda had to push through it and I feel a bit better now, drowning myself in music of other artist I love that aren’t diddlers bro 😭🤚 and talking to friends too helped ig

OH and idk if this seems stupid, but writing made me feel a lot better, even when I was unmotivated and didn’t want to. Writing is js like, such an escape ig, idek how to explain it. Like once u get into that rhythm of js spitting whatever words come to mind onto a page (or document ig 😭) u js feel so much more light hearted, like nothing else matters other than the silly little characters in the silly little stories you’re making. Writing, even if u feel like you’re not ‘good enough’ at it, is such a powerful thing, and I feel like people don’t talk about that enough.

Sorry if that was corny LMAO 💀🤚 (but at the same time idgaf cuz at least I’m happy 😩)

ANYWAYSS enough abt that. I think I’ll post the next chapter on like, idk this upcoming Sunday at the latest. Sorry for the long asf wait, but this next chapter is gonna be superrr long (or like I’m planning for it to be at least) a lot of shits gonna happen. I’ll let u speculate until then 😈 sorry not sorry 🥱

Really hope this one was worth the wait. Again, sorry abt that! I’ll be sure to *actually* post the next one on time, pinkie swear (I don’t break pinkie swears cuz if I do I gotta cut off my pinkie 😒) LMAO

That’s all for now. Byeee!

-

Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

Chapter 99: Despair

Notes:

CW: GRAPHIC DEPICTIONS OF VIOLENCE

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi’s throat went dry.

 

Air tightened in her lungs.

 

Her boots suddenly felt too heavy to lift.

 

The subway station’s noise dulled into a thin, distant static while her heart hammered so loud felt like it drowned out everything else.

 

Panic pooled hot and fast under her ribs—why the hell was J here?! She had been careful—or, well, careful enough… right? 

 

Now that she thinks about it… she’d been so absorbed in spending time with N it was like all her problems had disappeared—her underlying paranoia from J, thinking of the possibility she could be trailing them. How had she been so stupid that she’d let it slip her mind?

 

And how long had J been watching? How long had she known they were here? 

 

J still motioned her hand in a small wave—it was casual, infuriatingly composed—what should’ve been an ordinary gesture, what would’ve been an ordinary gesture if it were anyone else, read like malice when J was the one doing it. 

 

Uzi’s fingers curled into the fabric of her sleeve until her knuckles ached. Every instinct shouted to run, to shove past or call out to the few remaining drones in the station, to find N. But she felt frozen in time, her feet now rooted, treacherous and slow. 

 

J’s grin didn’t waver. The flickering light cast her teeth into shadows and slashes of brightness that made them look sharper than it should’ve been—or maybe that’s just because they were. 

 

For a sliver of a second their eyes met—locked—and something in that steady look told Uzi this was no coincidence.

 

She wasn’t seen. She was singled out. 

 

Uzi’s gaze whipped from wall to wall, searching for a gap in the thinning, barely existent crowd, for a stairwell, a sign, something that would give her a place to slip away. Her breathing came quick and shallow, chest tightening with each futile glance. Every few seconds she dragged her eyes back to J, unwilling to entirely let her out of her sight. 

 

J hadn’t moved at first—just stood rooted under the stuttering light, smirk curling at the corner of her mouth like she was savoring a secret. Her hand had fallen to her side now, no longer waving, but her attention never faltered. That steady stare locked Uzi in place, and the weight of it pressed like chains across her shoulders.

 

J’s smirk didn’t feel mocking so much as knowing, as if she had already won something Uzi wasn’t even aware she’d been competing for. 

 

Questions battered Uzi’s thoughts, each one more frantic than the last. What does she want? Why here? Why now? Maybe if she acted casual, pretended the whole thing was coincidence, she could scrape through this without incident. Smile, nod, be polite. Maybe even lie, toss in something about being here with a dozen other friends. Safety in numbers—even if it was an illusion.

 

But then J moved. 

 

One step, slow and deliberate, shoes just barely striking the concrete below. Then another step, followed by a few more. Her gait was too forcibly casual to be normal, yet too precise to be anything but intentional. The flickering light kept catching on her expression, the sharpened line of her smirk unfading. 

 

Dread spiked sharp in Uzi’s chest, flooding her limbs with cold panic. Instinct screamed at her, raw and primalwrong, wrong, wrong. 

 

Something was off. Terrifyingly so.

 

J wasn’t coming over to chat. She couldn’t be. This wasn’t simply idle curiosity. 

 

This was a predator crossing the distance to corner its prey.

 

Uzi’s whole body locked up, stiffening just shy of bolting. Her fight-or-flight surged, demanding she move, but her feet still felt glued to the floor. Her palms had gone clammy, fingers twitching at her sides, aching to reach for her phone, for some semblance of control, for anything. Her mind scrambled for excuses, exits, lies—anything that would buy her a second longer. 

 

But all the while, J kept walking forward, unhurried, as though she had all the time in the world. And the way her gaze burned into Uzi made it clear: she did. 

 

Uzi forced her eyes to keep moving, trying to appear like she was just another bored drone scanning the station and she hadn’t even noticed J, instead of feeling like a cornered animal.

 

That’s when she spotted it—a break in the bleak wall several paces down, a narrow offshoot half-swallowed in shadow. No sign above it, no clear markings to tell her where it led. It could be bathrooms. It could be an exit. Hell, it could be just a service hallway.

 

She didn’t know, and couldn’t grantee anything—but right now, it looked like her only chance. 

 

Everything went silenced and lazer-focused in Uzi’s mind, her gaze snapping between J and that offshoot. J was still advancing at the same steady, deliberate pace, her movements unhurried, almost lazy, like she still had no reason to rush.

 

That only made Uzi’s anxiety worse.

 

If I can just get over there… if there are drones in that hallway, she won’t try anything. She can’t. Not here, not with witnesses. Plus, why wouldn’t there be drones there? Even if there’s not many around now, there’s bound to be at least one drone doing whatever in that hallway, wherever it leads. 

 

Uzi clung to that last thought like a life raft, though doubt gnawed at the edges. J wasn’t reckless, no—but she was dangerous. What if she didn’t care about an audience anymore? Or worse—what if she was confident there wouldn’t be one? 

 

Her gaze cut sideways, just her eyes shifting, measuring the distance to the offshoot. Then she looked back at J. Still moving forward. Still smirking. That same look that said she could take her time, that Uzi couldn’t escape no matter how fast she ran. 

 

Her stomach twisted. No more waiting. She didn’t have the luxury. If she stayed here, J would be on her in seconds, and do who knows what. 

 

Uzi wasn’t going to stick around and find out.

 

She took one more glance at the offshoot, steadying herself. Her hands curled into tight fists, knuckles pale. I’ve got one shot. Run. Don’t think, just run. And pray there’s someone there. 

 

Her muscles tensed, like a coiled spring on the verge of snapping. She had a plan, flimsy as it was. All she had left now was the courage to move.

 

 Uzi didn’t waste another second—one last look at J, then her body moved on instinct.

 

She bolted. 

 

Her legs pounded against the tile, each step rattling through her frame, her chest burning with a frenzied thrum of panic. She could hear her own heartbeat slamming in her ears, feel the raw jolt of adrenaline screaming faster, faster, faster. 

 

Then—footsteps.

 

Behind her.

 

Rapid.

 

Heavy.

 

Too close.

 

The sound of J giving chase.

 

Uzi’s lungs felt like they were seizing up, her chest constricted, but she didn’t dare look back.

 

She couldn’t afford to.

 

She just fixed her eyes on that narrow hall and prayed it would lead somewhere—anywhere.


But when she skidded inside, her heart dropped.

 

It was a dead end.

 

The hall cut off into nothing but a blank wall and a single heavy door bolted to one side, unmarked and unwelcoming. A maintenance closet, maybe. No sign of life, no crowd of drones to shield her, no escape.

 

Her stomach plummeted. She had no other choice, so she darted toward the door, hand shooting out toward the handle—

 

—and then all the air was ripped from her chest.

 

Her body hit the concrete wall hard, the impact shuddering through her frame. A harsh, unyielding weight crushed across her throat—J’s arm. The metal forearm pinned her like an iron bar, her shoulder driving against Uzi’s neck until she could barely suck in air. She coughed out a broken gasp, her legs kicking uselessly against the ground, her throat aching in pain. 

 

J leaned close, her face inches from Uzi’s, her eyes sharp and glinting with smug satisfaction. The smirk that she had teased from afar had hardened into something worse up close—a condescending curve of her lips, like she had already won before Uzi had even tried to fight back.

 

“Aw,” J purred, her voice slick with mockery, low enough to sting in the small space. “Did I interrupt your little date?” 

 

Her words dripped with venom, designed to humiliate, to twist the knife deeper.

 

Uzi’s mind reeled. She wanted to shout, to spit back something clever, to claw her way free—but all that came was raw panic. Her throat burned where J’s arm pressed down, her shallow breaths coming in quick, rasping gulps. She felt trapped, powerless, the reality crashing down: she was cornered, with nowhere to run, and J had her exactly where she wanted her. 

 

Uzi’s vision blurred at the edges, her chest heaving against the weight on her throat. When she finally fully processed what just happened, she quickly reached up, fingers clawing desperately at J’s arm, nails scraping uselessly against metal. But, to her dismay, J’s hold was unyielding—a vice she couldn’t break. The pressure burned, each ragged breath more shallow than the last.

 

Still, Uzi forced the words out, her voice hoarse and broken but laced with defiance. “We’re not—on a date,” she rasped, glaring up at J. Even through the panic, Uzi still felt a tinge of embarrassment at the fact J must’ve assumed her and N were on a date… But the flustered denial she typically would’ve responded with was completely overshadowed by terror. 

 

For a heartbeat, J’s expression shifted—her smirk thinning into a line as her eyes narrowed. Then, with deliberate cruelty, she pressed her forearm harder into Uzi’s throat.

 

Pain spiked through her windpipe, a panicked wheeze breaking from her.

 

“Right…” J drawled, the word clearly unamused, like she wasn’t convinced in the slightest. “I saw you two. All cozy on that train. Made me want to gag.” Her tone was flat, her disgust carefully measured, not the slightest twitch of exaggeration on her face. That control, the way every syllable was calculated, only made it more terrifying. J wasn’t lashing out blindly—she knew exactly what she was doing, and she knew she had complete control. 

 

Uzi’s eyes stung as tears welled against her will. Her hands flailed, scratching harder at J’s arm, but her attempts only grew weaker the longer she was held down.

 

Her voice broke as she gasped between shallow gulps of air, choking out the words, “Why… why are youdoing this?” 

 

J grinned a crooked, now amused grin, her sharp teeth catching in the flickering light. The malice in her eyes was unmistakable.

 

“Because you know, she said, her voice low and deliberate, each word drawn out like the blade of a knife pressing into Uzi and twisting further. 

 

Even though V had warned her of this exact thing the other night—how J was growing suspicious of Uzi, how she was becoming convinced that Uzi knew what they were—hearing the words come out of J herself instilled fear so deep in Uzi that it shook her to her very core. 

 

But she couldn’t let J win—not here, not now. 

 

Uzi forced herself to meet her gaze, even as her body trembled with fear. Her words came out strained, shaky with both panic and anger. “I don’t… know what you’re—talking about.”

 

She lied through clenched teeth, knowing full well J wouldn’t believe her, but clinging to the denial anyway. Her heart hammered like it might rip through her chest. The terror of being pinned, the helplessness of her voice breaking under J’s control, mixed with the raw desperation of clinging to the only weapon she had left: her words.

 

J’s eyes flashed with something volatile, and before Uzi could brace herself, J’s fist drove mercilessly into her stomach. The blow knocked every ounce of breath from her body in a single, violent gasp.

 

Uzi doubled slightly forward instinctively, but couldn’t go far because she was still shoved harshly against the wall. Her hand, though, flew to her middle instead of J’s arm, the raw ache radiating through her frame like fire. Her legs threatened to buckle beneath her, but J’s weight against her throat kept her pinned upright.

 

“Don’t play dumb with me,” J snapped, her voice pointed and spiteful, each word striking harder than the last. “What do you take me for? Some kind of idiot?” 

 

Her expression twisted into something near feral—eyes wild, lips curling in a snarl that spoke of both fury and satisfaction. She looked utterly indifferent to the pain she had inflicted, as though Uzi’s suffering was nothing more than a tool, a lever to force the truth out—either that, or she was just relieving her frustrations. Uzi didn’t know which was worse.

 

She coughed, her chest burning as she tried to drag in air past the crushing weight of fear and the sharp pain in her ribs. The desperation that coursed through her circuits felt suffocating—but so did the anger. She forced her eyes back up to J’s, glaring through the tears stinging at the corners.

 

“You don’t—have to hurt me!” she choked out, her voice ragged and trembling, but steady enough to carry her rage. “I wasn’t—…going to tell anyone! The words tore from her throat in both a plea and a snarl, desperation tangled with fury. 

 

For a fleeting moment, J’s smirk faded. Her eyes narrowed, calculating, parsing Uzi’s outburst. Then her lips tugged upward again, slow and sinister.

 

“So,” J murmured, her tone soft but cutting, “You’re not denying it.” She didn’t phrase it as a question—more of an accusation she was entirely confident was right.

 

The realization hit Uzi just as hard as J’s punch, a sense of disquiet washing over her. She blinked, caught entirely off guard—her own words had betrayed her. Her mind was scrambled, screaming at her for the mistake, but the ever-worsening panic within her left no space to think it through.

 

Her stomach churned with dread. She hadn’t meant to slip. She hadn’t meant to give J exactly what she wanted. She hadn’t been able to think before she spoke, so caught up in the moment and the pain. And now—now she couldn’t take it back.

 

A cocktail of fear and fury churned in her chest until it was too much to contain. Her eye twitched, and in a surge of reckless desperation she snapped forward and sank her teeth into J’s forearm. 

 

The taste of cold alloy filled her mouth as she bit down with every ounce of strength she had, clamping harder when she heard J let out a sharp, furious yelp. The sound sent a jolt of triumph through her—even if fleeting.

 

J hissed through clenched teeth, tugging at her arm, but Uzi refused to let go. She locked her jaw tighter, determined to at least leave a mark, to prove she wasn’t going down without a fight. J finally tore her arm free with a sharp pull, the motion yanking Uzi’s head back.

 

Uzi’s chest heaved as air flooded back in, and she didn’t waste a second—she twisted on her heel, ready to bolt down the corridor.

 

Freedom was right there— 

 

But before she could take even two steps, J’s hand caught the hood of her jacket and yanked her backward with brutal force. 

 

Uzi cried out as her back slammed against the wall again, the impact rattling her teeth. Before she could recover, J’s hand clamped down on her face, pinching both cheeks so harshly it made her jaw ache, forcing her lips into a warped, helpless grimace. 

 

J gritted her teeth, jaw tight with frustration, raw fury present in her eyes.

 

Uzi’s eyes went wide as her gaze darted to J’s forearm. Her stomach dropped. The crescent dents of her bite were sealing shut, the metal knitting itself together as though nothing had happened. Any shred of satisfaction she’d felt was crushed in an instant. 

 

She was outmatched.

 

She was defenseless.

 

But that didn’t mean she was going to stop fighting.

 

Even stunned, her arms were still free, and she shoved at J with all her might, straining to push her back. But J’s hands shot out like iron shackles, the one from her face moving off, and the other working together to seize Uzi’s wrists and slam them against the wall above her head. The pressure was unbearable, like steel bands crushing her joints. 

 

She thrashed, but J’s grip didn’t even budge—inhumanly strong, unyielding.

 

Uzi’s only weapon left was her legs. She drew one back and lashed out, aiming for J’s shin with everything she had.

 

For a heartbeat, she thought she might’ve landed it—until pain exploded through her own leg.

 

J had kicked hers at the exact same time, twice as hard.

 

The sharp crack of impact sent agony searing up her shin, forcing a strangled cry from her, which was unfortunately muffled because she’d had the wind knocked out of her mere minutes ago. 

 

Her leg buckled, and she recoiled instinctively, trying to pull away even though she had nowhere to go. She couldn’t go limp, though, because J probably wouldn’t let go of her wrist, and Uzi didn’t want to seriously injure them. Panic clawed at her chest as she struggled uselessly under J’s unbreakable hold, feeling like a mouse caught in a predator’s trap.

 

“Stop squirming,” J snarled, voice flat with impatience as she tightened her grip. “You’re only making it worse for yourself.”

 

Uzi gasped, lungs stuttering in protest as the world swam at the edges. “What are you going to—do to me?!” she rasped between frantic breaths, fury and fear braided through her words. “Why won’t you just—leave me alone!” 

 

J’s patience snapped like a brittle wire. She shifted her grip so that only one hand was pinning both of Uzi’s wrist, still above her head. Then, since one of her hands was now free, with one brutal shove she slammed Uzi’s skull back against the wall, as hard as she possibly could; a hot, sour bloom of pain flared at the base of Uzi’s skull and she cried out weakly, dizzy and now stunned. A thin ribbon of oil welled from her nose and slicked down past her lip, the metallic tang making her stomach lurch with disgust. 

 

For a heartbeat Uzi thought J might relent because of how dazed she now was. Instead, J’s hand shifted into razor sharp claws, and she angled one toward Uzi. J’s razor-fingertip traced an inch from Uzi’s face, the shadow of the threat close enough that Uzi could feel the chill of it. 

 

“I can’t believe you bit me,” J said softly, almost conversational, every syllable drawn out and vindictive. “Like a little stray mutt. Petty. Insignificant. Stupid.” Her index claw almost pressed into the taut skin of Uzi’s cheek, just a centimeter away. She turned the motion into a slow, deliberate prick of humiliation and control, just barely grazing Uzi’s skin, “I could end you right now.” 

 

 

Uzi’s throat burned; the terrified words lodged there turned to a small, furious sound. “I don’t—” she started, voice raw, but the sentence fractured under J’s condescending tone.

 

Her grin widened—no warmth in it, only the careful satisfaction of someone enjoying a puzzle solved. “Maybe I would’ve spared you,” she purred, tilting her head like a cat considering whether to play before the kill. “If you’d kept your teeth to yourself, and listened to me when I said stop squirming.” Her hand hovered, the tips of those cruel, shining implements catching the flicker of the dim troffer above, making them glitter like knives. “But now?” She leaned in so close Uzi could see the faint tremor at the edges of her smile. “Now you’ll learn to do as you’re told.” 

 

Every nerve in Uzi’s body screamed to move. She flexed against the bands of J’s hold, brain scrambling for anything—shout, lash out, bargain, lie—but the corridor felt smaller with every passing second. The heat of embarrassment and terror burned beneath her skin; she swallowed bile and tried to steady her breath. Think, she told herself. Don’t give her the reaction she wants. 

 

J’s claw just barely dragged once across Uzi’s cheekbone, leaving a smear of oil and a promise of worse. “Wanna know something?,” she hissed, voice low and intimate in the cramped space. “It was so easy to trail you, I could’ve done it with my eyes closed,” her deranged grin widened, “I would say take this as a lesson for next time, but there won’t be a next time.” 

 

Uzi’s heart beat so fast she thought it was going to stop; every instinct told her to break, to scream for help, to bite and claw again. Instead she dug into the cheapest, shallowest defense she had left—defiance.

 

Her voice came out thin but sharp. “I don’t understand how you—get off on intimidating others,” she derided, fighting for the steadiness that might buy her a second. “You’re pathetic.” 

 

For a beat J’s face flickered—surprise, annoyance, something like almost-pleased confusion—then she laughed, a low, humorless sound. “Pathetic?” she echoed, as if testing the taste of the word. “Maybe.” She withdrew her hand a fraction and the metal tips gleamed. “But effective.” 

 

Uzi felt the corridor tilt; her knees still threatening to give, causing her to use any ounce of remaining strength to hold herself up. Her hands were still pinned, and her options thinned to a painful point—literally. 

 

Behind J’s composure, however, she caught the smallest sign of impatience—the twitch at the corner of her eye, the way her jaw set for the next bite of cruelty. Time was running out. She had to do something

 

Uzi thrashed weakly against J’s grip, and then a white-hot lance of pain tore through her arm. J’s claw dragged unhurriedly down the length of her forearm, slicing the fabric of her jacket and then plating like it was nothing. The cut wasn’t deep enough to cripple, but it was cruelly precise—designed to sting, to bleed, to linger. 

 

Oil welled up in dark beads before streaking down her skin, the acrid smell thick in the air. Uzi’s face twisted, eyes squeezing shut as the pain ripped through her nerves. Tears blurred her vision, threatening to spill no matter how stubbornly she fought them back. She tried to scream, to cry out, but her chest hitched, her voice breaking into a ragged wheeze instead of the sharp sound she’d meant.

 

J’s expression didn’t falter. Before Uzi could find her voice, a razor-tipped finger lifted and hovered just shy of her mouth, still glinting in the dim light. “Shhh,” J murmured, the sound mocking in its tenderness. Her tone slithered between amusement and menace. “We wouldn’t want anyone bothering us, would we? I’d hate to be interrupted.” The claw’s nearness was unbearable now—close enough that a flinch would slice her open. 

 

The weight of it all pressed in, panic getting worse by the second; her senses focused on the searing pain in her arm, the iron grip on her wrists, the helplessness of being cornered like prey.

 

Uzi wasn’t going to let this be the end, though.

 

Her chest heaved, rage sparking through the haze of fear. She lifted her chin as far as J’s grip allowed and spat straight into her face. “Fuck you,” she hissed, voice raw but just as sharp as the razors in front of her. 

 

Her reaction was immediate. J froze, blinking once in disbelief, then shifted her claws back into her normal hand. She then slowly dragged the back of it across her cheek, smearing the saliva away. Her lip curled, her expression twisting into sheer revulsion. For a split second, her composure cracked—the faint twitch in her eye betraying her fury—before a low, humorless laugh spilled out of her.

 

“Oh, you shouldn’t have done that,” J murmured, her voice velvet and venom all at once. The corners of her mouth stretched into a smile that revealed every unnaturally sharp tooth, yet again glinting under the fluorescent light. It wasn’t amusement—it was a threat. 

 

Her fingers shifted again, smooth and seamless, into the long, pointed blades. Uzi barely had time to register the movement before a single claw slashed across her cheek. The cut burned like fire, and she flinched hard, a strangled cry breaking out of her. Tears she’d been holding back spilled over, streaming hot down her face, mixing with the fresh trickle of oil.

 

Stop—please, just stop!” Uzi begged, her voice shaking, words spilling out on instinct. 

 

But J didn’t falter. If anything, her grin widened, manic delight spreading across her features as she leaned in closer, savoring every flicker of pain that crossed Uzi’s face.

 

Uzi’s body trembled under her grip, fear and fury warring inside her chest. She wanted to keep glaring, to keep fighting, but the sting in her cheek, the ache in her arm, and the suffocating closeness of J’s claws made her feel like she was unraveling by the second.

 

And worst of all—J looked like she was enjoying every single moment of it. 

 

J’s claw hovered for only a heartbeat before lowering to Uzi’s throat. The point tapped against the fragile plating of her neck, and then—agonizingly slow—it dragged horizontally. The sound was unbearable: metal screeching against metal, a drawn-out scrape that made every nerve in Uzi’s body jolt with white-hot pain. 

 

Her breath hitched, a sob breaking loose despite her desperate attempt to stay strong. The shallow cut burned like fire, not deep enough to end her yet, but deep enough that she felt every inch of the claw’s merciless path. Her body shook uncontrollably, pinned in place, her mind reeling with the horrifying realization that she couldn’t fight back. 

 

She was helpless. Powerless. Trapped under J’s claw like rabbit beneath a fox’s teeth.

 

Am I going to die here? 

 

The thought struck hard, hollowing her out from the inside.

 

She was still so young, her life only just beginning—and yet, because she’d let her guard down, because she’d allowed herself to forget her struggles, to let go and feel truly happy with N for once—this was how it would end. The bitter twist of it made her ache deep inside even more than the wound did. 

 

Her eyes brimmed with spilling tears, vision blurring as she struggled to force words past the lump in her throat. “P–please… s–stop…” she whimpered, her voice cracking, growing fainter with every plea. But J’s claw only pressed harder, smiling as the cut deepened, drawing more oil, drinking in every sound of Uzi’s suffering. 

 

Hopelessness closed in on her, suffocating. She could already feel herself slipping, her strength draining with every agonizing second. The last thought that flared in her chest wasn’t for herself, but for him—N. She would never see him again, never hear his laugh, never feel his comfort, never tell him the things she should have. That realization crushed her more than J’s claws ever could. 

 

And then—

 

Something slammed into the side of J’s head with violent force, a sickening metallic crack echoing through the air. The impact tore her off Uzi entirely, flinging her sideways like a ragdoll. She crashed into the wall with bone-rattling force, metal denting against stone before she crumpled hard to the floor. 

 

Uzi gasped, every nerve in her body still aflame, but the sudden freedom left her dizzy, trembling, and clinging to the edge of consciousness. Relief and terror collided in her chest, leaving her with only one fragile thought—she wasn’t dead. Not yet. 

 

Her legs then buckled beneath her, strength draining as though J’s claws had carved it right out of her. She dropped hard onto the cold concrete, her palms smearing through the dark, glistening streaks of oil pooling beneath her wounds. The sharp stench of it filled her senses, thick and nauseating, mingling with the iron bite of fear still lodged in her throat. The gray subway tiles blurred in her vision, stained black with what she was losing too quickly. 

 

Through the haze, a voice cut through—desperate, panicked, calling her name. “…UZI!”

 

Her gaze lifted sluggishly, fighting the pull of unconsciousness, and she saw him.

 

N.

 

His figure loomed above her, wild-eyed, his hand trembling as new-formed claws from one of his hands slicked with fresh oil, steam visibly rising off them before fading in the light. Then, the blades shifted back into a smooth, regular metal hand. He dropped down to her level, the terror etched across his face raw, frantic. His hand hovered just above her shoulder, twitching as though he longed to help but didn’t know where to begin.

 

A major spark of relief broke its way through the pain. He was here. He’d found her. But before she could even try to speak, before she could reach for him— 

 

A blur of movement struck from the side, and N was ripped away from her in an instant. The sound of metal colliding with metal echoed as J drove him to the floor, straddling him with all the ferocity of a rabid animal. Both her hands were claws now, oil covered blades gleaming under the sterile lights. She slashed down, her movements fast and merciless, the first swipe aimed straight for his face.

 

N barely managed to raise his own claws in time, crossing them to shield himself. Sparks spat as the weapons met, the sharp shing, shing of grinding metal ringing through the offshoot in the subway. 

 

Uzi’s heart lurched painfully at the sight. She wanted to scream, to tell him to get away, to beg him not to risk himself for her—but her voice caught uselessly in her throat. Fear clawed at her insides, not only for her own wounds, but for him. He was the only reason she wasn’t lying dead already, and now J’s rage was turned fully on him. 

 

She was torn between the crushing weakness that pinned her down, and the desperate, burning need to move, to do something, anything to keep him from being torn apart before her eyes. But she was simply too weak to be of any use. 

 

J’s face twisted with irritation, a low groan escaping her throat before she barked down at him, her tone exasperated, “Don’t get in my way, imbecile!” 

 

From the ground, N held his arms up, claws fully extended to shield his face, straining under her relentless assault. The sound of scraping metal filled the air, the struggle frantic and brutal.

 

Uzi let out a shaky, defeated breath, her chest heaving shallowly as she lay against the cold tiles. She felt the oil still leaking from her arm, neck, and the stinging cut across her cheek, every drip a reminder of how close she was to fading from reality.

 

Her vision blurred at the edges, and she could only half-follow the chaos in front of her.

 

N, with a burst of strength, twisted beneath J and sat up with a powerful shove, throwing her backward. He lunged forward instantly, claws flashing, and buried them deep into her shoulder with a sickening crunch of metal. J hissed in pain, but before she could retaliate, N’s other hand—shifted back to its normal form—snapped forward and delivered a merciless punch square to her face. The blow echoed sharply, and J’s body went limp, splayed against the ground in an awkward position. 

 

For a moment, the world seemed to still. N wrenched his claws free from her shoulder, oil streaking down their sharpened tips. He slashed once more across her face, a quick, fierce strike to make sure she stayed down. Her body didn’t stir.

 

He didn’t waste another second.

 

His claws folded away as he scrambled upright, his whole frame tense with panic, and then he was hurling himself toward Uzi.

 

She lay curled on the ground like a discarded paper ball, broken and barely holding herself together. The second he reached her, his voice cracked in despair, spilling out in ragged gasps. “No… no, no, no, no… this can’t—this can’t be happening!” His words tumbled over themselves, desperate and trembling, as though saying them enough times might undo reality. 

 

He wasted no time and gathered her up, hands shaking, but his grip on her was heartbreakingly gentle.

 

Even in the storm of his terror, his touch was cautious, cradling her like she was something precious. 

 

That tenderness nearly broke her. Despite the burning pain coursing through every nerve, despite the fear still choking her, the care in his touch made her want to cry, but not in the same way as earlier. For the first time since J had attacked, she felt the sting of tears for something other than pain. She wanted to sob—not from the wounds, not from the terror—but because even when she was this broken, he held her like she mattered. 

 

Uzi’s eyelids grew unbearably heavy, each blink dragging longer than the last, her vision dimming at the edges. A high-pitched ringing filled her ears, drowning out almost everything but the sound of her own faltering breath. Her head felt weightless, as though it were barely attached to her body.

 

Somewhere through the haze, through the black spots dotting her vision, N’s voice cut through—raw, broken, frantic. “Uzi—please. Please stay with me. Don’t—don’t close your eyes. Don’t you dare.” His words trembled, every syllable torn from the core of his fear, like he was trying to anchor her here with nothing but desperation. 

 

She wanted to answer him, to tell him she was trying, but her throat burned. Instead, she barely managed to choke out his name, her voice weak, strained, “N—” Her gaze flicked past his shoulder, and her stomach twisted in terror. 

 

Behind him, J was rising again. The gashes carved into her face and shoulder, once slick with spilling oil, now glistened as they mended themselves closed, metal sealing in real time with an unnatural, steady rhythm. Her movements were unsteady at first, staggering, but it was undeniable—she was standing. She was recovering. 

 

N whipped his head around and froze for the briefest of moments, his eyes wide with realization and horror.

 

He didn’t waste another second.

 

His grip around Uzi tightened, and then he was moving—no, fleeing. He scooped her fully into his arms, holding her against his chest in a frantic bridal carry, and bolted down the dim, echoing subway corridor. 

 

The world blurred around her, her arm dangling limply at her side, swaying with every thunderous step he took. He was running faster than anything she thought a drone should be capable of—blindingly fast, the floor a streak beneath them. Or maybe it only felt that way because her head was swimming, her senses reeling. She couldn’t tell, but wasn’t aware enough to think about it any further.

 

Uzi’s chest ached with the effort of staying conscious. Fear coiled inside her like a vice, but not just for herself anymore—for him, yet again. He was running like the world depended on it, and all she could think, even in her dazed state, was that if J caught them again… she wasn’t sure either of them would survive it. 

 

Uzi’s eyelids fluttered as if weighted with lead, her vision worsening, hazy and unfocused—until something caught her eye.

 

A door.

 

A restroom.

 

The universal family restroom symbol, something typically barely noticeable and mundane, now glared back at her like a beacon in the dark.

 

Summoning what little strength remained, she forced the words through her aching throat, her voice little more than a rasp. “There…” She tried to lift her arm, to point, but it barely twitched, and she could feel oil slowly dripping down her fingertips. 

 

N’s head snapped in the direction of her gaze, and without hesitation he veered hard, his footsteps echoing down the seemingly empty corridor.

 

The door loomed closer, salvation within reach—except behind them, Uzi’s blurred vision sharpened just enough to see J streaking after them. Her face was pristine now, the torn metal sealed flawlessly, the cuts nothing but a memory. Only the dark stains across her shirt and remaining smears across her face betrayed what had happened. The sight filled Uzi with dread. She wheezed N’s name again, this time sharpened with panic. “…N…!” 

 

N’s voice was tight, hurried, near a whisper yet frantic all the same. “I know—I know, I’ve got you—hang on—” His hands shook as he seized the doorknob, fumbling in desperation. For a split second Uzi thought it wouldn’t open, thought J would be on them before they got inside—but then the knob gave, and he wrenched the door open. 

 

They spilled into the restroom, and N kicked it shut behind them with a metallic slam. He clicked the lock in place as fast as he possibly could, and then he pressed the entire weight of his back against the door, as if sheer force could keep J from breaking through. 

 

A violent BANG rattled the frame, the metal door bowing inward for an instant. 

 

Another bang followed, then another, like a battering ram slamming into their fragile haven. 

 

Uzi flinched with each impact, her body limp, and she felt hot tears spill unbidden from the corners of her eyes. She hated it—hated the helplessness, the fear, the way her body refused to obey her.

 

Above her, N held her a little closer against himself, his voice low, cracked with urgency but softened to a near plea. “Uzi—please… don’t cry. Don’t… don’t cry, okay? You’re safe now. I promise.” His words wavered, and though he tried to steady his voice, his eyes betrayed him—they were wet, glassy, shimmering like he was a second away from breaking apart himself.

 

And that almost made it worse. Uzi could see it in him, the way he held her like porcelain while leaning against that bowing door, fighting to be her shield while barely holding himself together. She hated herself for crying, but even more, she hated that she could see just how terrified he was too.


The pounding in Uzi’s ears almost drowned everything else out—until the faint screech of metal reached her, echoing from somewhere far beyond the walls.

 

A train.

 

Its brakes screamed against the rails, grinding to a halt.

 

And then—silence.

 

The relentless assault on the bathroom door ceased as if cut off mid-strike. Uzi strained to listen past the ringing in her head, and ignore the dark spots in her vision.

 

That’s when she heard a guttural, annoyed groan reverberated through the metal, close enough that it made her stiff in.

 

Then—nothing.

 

For one foolish heartbeat, she thought J was gone.

 

But in the next instant, a voice slithered through the thin crack of the doorframe, syrupy and singsong, as though J had slipped into the room itself. “I’ll be waiting~” The words were soft, but cruel in their intimacy, dripping poison into the small airless space. 

 

A final SLAM rocked the door, hard enough to make the lock rattle in its frame. Then the sound of retreating footsteps—quick, sharp, fading down the tiled corridor—left the room swallowed in silence.

 

Relief should have come then, should have washed over Uzi like a wave. But her chest stayed tight, her circuits still sparking with adrenaline. Every nerve screamed that J wasn’t gone for good, that the reprieve was nothing more than a pause before the killing blow.

 

N’s arms curled around her more firmly, pulling her in as if he could shield her from the memory of what had just happened. His face hovered above hers, anguish written into every line—eyes glassy, jaw trembling, mouth pressed tight as if he were holding back a sob.

 

When he finally spoke, his voice cracked, raw with desperation. “Uzi… I’m so sorry. I’m gonna fix this—I swear I’ll fix this. All of it. No matter what it takes.” The words tumbled out, thick with guilt, almost like a confession.

 

Uzi blinked sluggishly, staring up at him through blurry eyes. She wanted to ask how, wanted to tell him it was pointless, that she was going to bleed out, and even if she didn’t J would find them no matter what.

 

But the earnest devastation on his face—his brows drawn tight, his lip trembling as if he was seconds from breaking—stilled the words in her throat.

 

Her body felt weightless in his arms, every ounce of strength gone. And yet, for the briefest moment, pressed against his chest, she thought she could almost believe him. That maybe he could fix it. That maybe she wasn’t completely lost.

Notes:

So, that just happened 🤓☝️

HOLY FUCK I’m so sorry 😭 IT’S FOR THE PLOT OKAY DONT FORGET

Really hope this chapter was worth the wait! The next one is gonna be pretty long too, but won’t be like,,, violent like this one. If that makes anyone feel better 🥲

I can’t believe this is chapter NINTY-NINE. Isn’t that insane?!? And the next one is gonna be 100?!?!!?

What a milestone. Never would’ve thought this fic would last this long.

I think I’m ready to reveal something now. After the Newe City arc, I think I’m gonna end the fic. The last chapter, though, is gonna be really really long, so like I won’t give yall a shitty ending. As much as I’d love to do another arc, I really wanna end this fic, but like not in a rushed manner or anything, if that makes sense.

I’ll still probs do one shots based off of this fic, so if ur interested in that don’t forget! Might even do request for one shots that like, take place in the same universe as this fic, from like any point. If anyone wants to see a specific scene from a different characters point of view, or even something that’d happen after the fic ends, there’s a pretty high chance I’ll write it.

OH ONE MORE THING SUPER SUPER IMPORTANT- I made a playlist for this fic 😖 I was thinking abt it a lot earlier today cuz I suddenly got the idea, so I decided I might as well. For any future fics I do I’ll probs make playlist for them at some point as well.

Gonna link it below. Js copy and paste it into a browser or som cuz idk if the link will work from here:

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2pvGfmWDf4cfhulk7Bz8qW?si=j34Kr2j6SVqUEq8HT7SbHw&pi=tkk6D-mnS8Gtj

It has a really mellow vibe to it, which I think really suits it. But I had to restrain myself from adding any heavy rock or metal or som js cuz I think it’s something Uzi would listen to 😭 was very difficult to not give into the temptation but I pulled through 😼

I think there’s maybe like, one or two songs slightly on the heavier side, but I wouldn’t consider them metal. Like, slightly heavy drums and stuff (ex. A sad cartoon, Is it really you?, mercy, Blank- don’t feel like naming the artist, you’ll have to check it out if u don’t know the songs 😈) but again not really metal

Okay that’s everything. Would write more but I’m lowkey tired- BYEEE!

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Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’m very open to constructive criticism so feel free to comment your thoughts! And please let me know if there’s any typos! If you have any suggestions I’d very much appreciate that, and I’ll be sure to credit you if I use any. Thank you!

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EDIT: Js realized I forgot to say when I’m gonna post the next chapter. Should be posted Saturday. OKAY BYE AGAIN SORRY 😭

EDIT 2 (10/4/2025): Okay yall so I don’t have time to post the chapter today. Have been like, SUPERRR busy all day 😭🤚 (went to spirit Halloween for the first time in my life- surprisingly underwhelming 😔) BUT YEAH THATS BESIDES THE POINT anyways, I have the chapter like, done BUT still need to revise it. And it’s late asf rn, and I’m not even a quarter of the way through cuz the chapter is so long bro 😭 really need to get my sleep 💔 not gonna risk the quality of the chapter being shit js cuz im tired 🤧
OKAY SO YEAH posting it tomorrow like 100% actually I swear. Probs around midday!

Chapter 100: Teeth

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uzi’s gaze drifted up to N, heavy-lidded and unfocused, and with what little strength she could summon she gave the faintest nod in response to what he had said. She couldn’t form words—her throat was too raw, her chest too tight. But she hoped he understood.

 

Regardless if he did or not, N didn’t waste another second. He pushed himself off the door and half-carried, half-cradled her to the center of the cramped restroom.

 

The unkept-fluorescent light above buzzed and hummed, casting its harsh white glow across the off-grey square tiled floor. With a gentleness that nearly undid her, he lowered her down, laying her carefully onto the cold tiles before sinking beside her. He hovered for a moment, indecisive, torn between anxiety and purpose, then sat down fully, his posture stiff as if bracing himself against a storm he couldn’t weather.

 

From her blurred vantage, Uzi caught the stains on his arms, his shirt—dark smears of her oil streaking across him like a brand. 

 

She winced inwardly, heart lurching with the realization. How much had she lost already? Enough that her head swam and her stomach pitched as though gravity itself tilted beneath her. Her limbs felt hollow, her body too light, like she might just slip away at any second. 

 

N’s face, though, was what made her stomach drop, more prevalent than the pain. Panic carved itself deep into his expression—his wide, glowing yellow eyes unblinking, his jaw clenched tight. His hands shook uncontrollably, trembling as though they no longer belonged to him. At last he pressed one hand against his mouth, stifling a sound, shielding his face like the very sight of her was unbearable.

 

Uzi wanted to tell him to stop looking at her like that, like he had lost all hope and given up. She wanted to tell him to stop acting like she was already gone and he was starting to grieve. But the words wouldn’t come, and the thought twisted cruelly in her chest: What if he had given up? 

 

N lifted his arm toward her, moving until his hand hovered uncertainly above her face. He hesitated briefly before finally reaching down, trembling fingers brushing against the side of Uzi’s cheek. The touch was feathery and barely there, as though he believed even the slightest pressure might turn her to dust. He skirted carefully around the cut carved across her cheek, avoiding it at all cost and grazing his hand onto the other, non-injured side with one helpless caress. Every one of his movements betrayed how desperately he wanted to help yet feared he might make things worse.

 

Uzi’s gaze, dimmed and desperate, locked onto his. For a moment, they just stared at one another—her silently pleading, him frantically searching for words he barely believed himself.

 

Finally, his voice broke through, low and uneven. “It’s going to be alright, Uzi,” he whispered, though the words wavered at the edges. “I’ll… I’ll fix this. I promise. I’m not going to let you—” His voice faltered, caught somewhere between fear and determination. He swallowed hard, forcing the next words out like a vow carved into stone. “I’m not losing you. I can’t, I can’t.”

 

Uzi’s chest rose and fell with shallow, uneven breaths. She heard the cracks in his voice, the tremor underneath the promise, and she knew it was a mask—fragile, barely holding together. Yet even that frail shield of confidence was something she clung to, because if N believed there was still a chance, then maybe she could believe it too. Or at least, that’s what she was going to tell herself. 

 

When he finally pulled his hand away, the absence felt cold against her skin. He dragged the same hand through his platinum hair in one jerky motion, tugging at it in frustration before letting it fall back into his lap. His fingers fidgeted restlessly, twisting together as though grasping for answers he couldn’t find. His wide eyes stayed fixed on her, brimming with frantic thought, as if staring hard enough might reveal the solution before it was too late.

 

Uzi wanted to tell him to stop torturing himself, to tell him she was still here, still fighting. But all she could do was breathe—each breath smaller, shallower, like sand slipping through an hourglass. Inside, panic and dread coiled tight. If he can’t figure this out… I won’t make it. 

 

But then, something caught her completely off guard… in the worst possible way. 

 

At first, Uzi thought her eyes were playing tricks on her—the blur in her vision not helping. But after trying her best to focus, she realized—she wasn’t seeing things. It was real. A thin trail of drool clung to the corner of N’s mouth, catching the dim light as it trailed down toward his chin. It was subtle, almost easy to overlook, but the sight jolted through her like a surge of ice. 

 

Another line followed from the other corner of his mouth, and before she could even make sense of it, it was no longer subtle. Drool welled up and spilled in uneven rivulets, slipping down his mouth in a way that made her gut clench with a sudden, piercing dread. 

 

N noticed too. How could he not? His hand snapped up, rough and desperate, smearing it away with the heel of his palm, but the effort was useless—the wet sheen already reformed, as though mocking him. 

 

His expression twisted, caught somewhere between frustration, panic, and something darker—something restrained. His wide eyes darted away from her for an instant, as though he couldn’t bear to let her see what he was fighting against. When he finally forced his gaze back to hers, Uzi’s only spark of hope left was snuffed out under the storm she saw there—conflict, fear, and a hunger he couldn’t admit. 

 

She managed only the faintest frown, her face slack with weakness. A shallow blink, almost too slow, was the only answer she could give him. Inside, though, her thoughts screamed. This isn’t good. Not him. Not now. Don’t lose control. Please, N… not with me like this. 

 

Her chest felt restricted—not just from the effort of breathing, but from the awful realization creeping in. N wasn’t just panicking for her. He was panicking for himself. He was fighting something she wasn’t sure he could win.

 

Uzi knew exactly why. She absolutely hated to admit it, but every ounce of her awareness screamed the truth at her—it was the oil. Her oil. 

 

It had been much different earlier—when her hand was bleeding. Yeah, he had drooled, but it was no where near as much as it was now. If she had to guess, the scent of her oil was probably completely overwhelming his senses. If she could smell the gross, acrid  stench of her oil, so could he. But who knows what it smelled like to him—if it was causing him to drool this much and look at her like something he desperately needed to fulfill his hunger, it had to be a lot more pleasant for him. 

 

And even worse. It was all over him. All over her. Slowly but steadily continuing to pool beneath her on the floor. She could only imagine the thoughts running through his head right now. 

 

A trembling unease crawled through her circuits, coiling heavy in her chest. What if this was the moment he lost control? He’d mentioned it before, hadn’t he—how hard it was to fight the pull, how impossible it felt to ignore the scent of oil when it was this close.

 

And now here she was, spraled out before him. He had the most perfect opportunity to strike. She might as well have been on a dinner plate.

 

She wasn’t more than just a friend to him right now. She was prey.

 

The thought chilled her to the bone.

 

Her eyes stung as she let out an uneven breath, her body too weak for anything else. She couldn’t fight, couldn’t run—all she had left was trust. And yet, staring at him now, she wasn’t sure if trust was enough.

 

Her lips parted, and she attempted to use all the strength she could manage so her voice would break through the silence. But, it was barely more than a hoarse whisper. “…N…?” her tone was fragile, pleading, almost a question.

 

That was all it took. It immediately snapped him out of it. 

 

N’s head jerked towards her as though her voice tugged him back from some abyss. His eyes found hers again, the haze of hunger faltering as recognition bled back in.

 

He shifted closer across the cold tile, inch by inch, like he was worried that approaching her too quickly might startle her.

 

Uzi’s mind tangled itself in knots. She did trust him. She’d staked so much on that already. Then why did terror claw at her insides now? Why couldn’t she fully believe he wouldn’t do the one thing she couldn’t bear to imagine? 

 

His eyes told a story she wasn’t ready for—a wild glint that was unmistakable, yes, but layered beneath it was something else. Something raw. His expression wasn’t only yearning and seemingly famished. It was hurting. Regret etched across every line of his face, sorrow carved deep in the way he looked at her. 

 

And somehow, that made it worse. Because he didn’t want this. He was terrified, too. It wasn’t just a wanting desire—it was a need that he could barely control. 

 

N didn’t move at first when he had scooted closer. He just hovered there, like a statue locked in place. His eyes darted over her like he was caught between ten different impulses and couldn’t choose a single one. His jaw was tight, lips pressed so firmly together it looked painful, the faintest tremor running through him as though even breathing was a battle.

 

And then—he made a choice.

 

A small shake of his head, pointed and sharp, like he was trying to rattle loose whatever thought had rooted in his mind. His hand rose, hesitant but deliberate, reaching for her.

 

Uzi’s stomach twisted as she realized what he was reaching for. Her arm. The one marked with that vicious diagonal slash, the wound still leaking sluggish beads of black down to her wrist and the length of her forearm. She tensed, bit her lip hard enough to taste iron, the soreness screaming the instant his fingers brushed her.

 

But the way he touched her… it wasn’t frantic. It wasn’t eager. He didn’t lunge for her like some starving beast finally giving in.

 

Instead, he picked up her arm with painstaking care, as if he was worried he’d somehow manage to hurt her. The soft pressure of his hand curled under her wrist, steadying her, while his other hand supported the weight by holding underneath her forearm. Every movement was deliberate, slow, cautious. Even like this—even with oil practically calling to him—he hadn’t lost himself completely.

 

That should have soothed her, right? Proof that he wasn’t gone yet, that some thread of control still tethered him? But Uzi’s chest still heaved shallow, her thoughts spiraling.

 

But gentle didn’t mean safe. Careful didn’t mean certain.

 

His voice broke through her doubts at last, low and uneven. A murmur, like he was speaking to himself as much as to her. “I’m going to help you… this’ll make it better. Everything’s going to be okay, just… bear with me… please…”

 

The words landed fragile in the air, thin as glass. He tried to sound steady, but Uzi heard it—the tremor, the desperation clothed in forced calm. A promise that was more prayer than certainty.

 

Her eyes stung. Was he trying to reassure her… or himself? 

 

N angled her arm with painstaking precision, as though the mangled limb in his grasp was something sacred instead of something broken. His shoulders hunched forward, and before Uzi could gather the strength to protest, he lowered his head.

 

The first touch of his tongue against her torn plating made her flinch, her eyes snapping shut as if shutting him out would soften the reality. The sensation was sharp, alien—a closeness she hadn’t been ready for, made unbearable by the fact it wasn’t unbroken skin he was touching, but the raw, split edges of her wound.

 

Her chest hitched with a shudder, an involuntary tremor running down her body. It wasn’t a violent pain—at least, not everywhere. Most of her arm was so numbed by oil loss that his tongue left only a strange, wet tickle, the uncomfortable drag of him tracing up the length of us arm where sensation was already fading. But when he reached her wrist, where the pain still burned bright and angry, it was different. Her breath caught, her jaw clenched until it ached, and a stifled wince nearly broke free as a sound.

 

And yet… he didn’t rush. There was no wildness, no mindless frenzy in the way he worked. His movements were excruciatingly deliberate, slow and steady, like he was tracing each centimeter with a reverence that unsettled her. Tender. Careful.

 

Uzi forced her eyes open for just a second, catching the way his expression contorted as he did this. Not hunger—well, not entirely. There was something else there, buried behind the drool and the barely-there restraint. Guilt. Desperation. A quiet sorrow that made her chest ache almost as much as the wound itself.

 

She knew why he was doing it. Of course she knew. He was trying to heal her with his saliva. This was supposed to help her. This was him saving her. 

 

But why did it feel so wrong? Why did her heart pound like he was stealing something from her instead of giving?

 

Her thoughts swirled, tangled with fear, any remaining edge of trust starting to falter.

 

But then Uzi remembered something.

 

It had worked earlier. Sort of. The pain had dulled quickly, but the wound hadn’t vanished in minutes like magic. It had been slow, steady, and had taken what—twenty minutes? Half an hour? Before it was almost gone—and even so, when she had looked at it again after that span of time, the smallest scratch had still remained. A reminder that this wasn’t an instant solution. 

 

But that had been nothing. A slightly deep scrape, just a nuisance.

 

The wounds she had now were an entirely different kind of damage.

 

Her arm was carved from wrist to forearm, her cheek slit open, and worst of all, the long, stinging gash that cut halfway across her neck. They weren’t surface-level scrapes. They were deep, ragged. Real. 

 

And suddenly, the thought slammed into her harder than the pain ever could—what if this didn’t work fast enough? What if her body couldn’t keep up? 

 

Her neck burned where J’s claws had dragged across it, a place so vulnerable that she could’ve—no, probably did nick something vital. Even now, she could feel the oil still spilling from her wounds, soaking into her clothing, warm and slick and wrong.

 

Her breath hitched. She didn’t dare move, didn’t dare speak, scared to make it worse. The fear coiled around her chest like a vice.

 

What if she didn’t make it? What if she died right here on this grimy floor, before his saliva had a chance to knit the metal back together? What if she never woke up from this? She’d never see N again, she never get to tell him the things she should’ve.

 

Her heart stuttered under the weight of it, and for the first time, she realized just how fragile she felt. Not in control. Not clever or defiant. Just small. Breakable. And utterly terrified. 

 

How much oil had she lost now? Too much—far more than any drone should still be functioning with. She could feel it still seeping from her, warm and sluggish as it slid down the vulnerable slope of her neck and arm, trailing over the delicate seams of her metal. Each droplet felt like time running out. A timer counting down, about to go off any second.

 

N’s tongue dragged over the length of her arm again, unhurried, meticulous, as though he were trying to cleanse every trace of oil from the laceration. That’s when Uzi noticed. It seemed like he wasn’t just healing her anymore—his mouth lingered near her wrist, mouth sealing over the gash as though he were drawing the oil out. The rhythm of his mouth wasn’t clinical, it was… indulgent. 

 

Her eyes widened slightly, blinking through the fog threatening to swallow her mind. He looked entranced, like the world had slipped away from him entirely and left him floating in some feverish haze. The wild, glassy shimmer in his eyes told her he wasn’t fully here—not with her, not in this bathroom, but somewhere darker, deeper, where instinct ruled.

 

Then she felt it. A faint, deliberate scrape of teeth brushing her wrist. Not enough to break the surface, not enough to bite, but enough to remind her exactly what he was capable of.

 

A shiver rattled through her weak frame, equal parts fear and something she couldn’t name. He wasn’t tearing her apart like J, but the danger was still there—sharp, immediate, terrifying. And yet… he was holding her so carefully, so tenderly, his grip almost reverent. It was such a strange contrast to what he was doing

 

Her heart clenched as two truths warred within her, he was trying to save her, yet at the same time, he could so easily lose control.

 

And she was too weak to stop him if he did.

 

The tremor that ran through her must have jolted something inside him, because N suddenly froze—his mouth still parted, breath shuddering against her wrist. Then, all at once, he pulled away. The look on his face was one of pure horror, like he’d just woken from a nightmare only to realize it hadn’t been one at all. His eyes were wide in disbelief, and the lower half of his face was streaked with her oil, smeared across his mouth, his chin, the edges of his jaw. It gleamed darkly under the harsh light, and for one awful heartbeat, neither of them moved.

 

Then it seemed like he panicked—but in a different way than before. His chest rose and fell in shallow, disquieted bursts, and Uzi could practically see the guilt already eating him alive.

 

He turned toward her slowly, almost afraid to meet her eyes. When he finally did, his expression shattered—there was no aggression, no wildness left; only pure, unfiltered fear. Fear of what he’d done. Fear of what he still might do.

 

Uzi blinked at him, her eyelids heavy, her vision still fracturing by creeping darkness, like a small crack spreading across glass. The world felt distant, muffled, and yet she could see the tremble in his hands as he carefully set her arm down against the cold tile floor.

 

His fingers lingered, wrapping around her hand. His thumb brushed along the ridge of her knuckles—gentle, rhythmic, shaky. She couldn’t tell if it was meant to comfort her, or if it was the only thing keeping him grounded.

 

The touch faded after a moment, and his hand slipped away. N’s gaze flicked back to her face, searching, desperate. But then his eyes darted lower—to her neck.

 

His breath caught audibly.

 

The spreading trail of oil there was darker now, thicker, glistening like spilled ink as it ran from the wound down her collar and dripped onto the floor. His eyes widened with dread as the reality hit him full force: she was still bleeding out. Rapidly. 

 

Whatever remaining haze that had clouded him before vanished quickly, replaced by a raw, frantic terror. He looked utterly undone, petrified to the core—and Uzi could only stare back, her heart heavy and slow, knowing just by the look on his face that he was about to do something desperate.

 

N shifted closer until his shadow fell across her face. His movements were nervous and unsure, as though he were afraid she might vanish if he wasn’t careful enough. With a quivering hand, he brushed aside a few strands of her purple bangs that had fallen over her eyes. The gesture was caring, almost reverent. His knuckles then grazed the uninjured side of her cheek—light yet intentional—like he was trying to memorize the feeling of her while he still could.

 

Up this close, his expression was almost unbearable to look at. His features had collapsed into something empty, a kind of despair so deep it seemed to hollow him out from the inside. There was no fire left in his eyes, no frantic calculations about what to do next—just sheer devastation. A drone who had always been patient, gentle, careful, now completely undone before her.

 

Uzi could feel the warmth draining out of her limbs, the world narrowing at the edges of her sight. The ringing in her ears dulled into a low hum, and with each shallow breath, her body felt lighter, further away. And yet, even through the haze, she could still feel his touch, could still see his face above her, and that thought tethered her. 

 

She realized then—this might really be how it ends.

 

Not in some grand moment of heroism or defiance, but here, on the cold tile floor of a subway bathroom in New Ore City.

 

She’d never imagined this would be her final scene.

 

But if it was, at least she wouldn’t be alone…

 

At least N was here. 

 

The only drone who had ever really seen her, who never recoiled from her sharp edges, who listened instead of judging, who understood her without demanding anything in return. The only one who had been patient with her when no one else had or ever could be.

 

Her heart ached with something heavier than the pain of her wounds. There was comfort, even now, in his presence—comfort so intense it almost frightened her. She’d never felt this way about anyone before, never allowed herself to. And yet, here it was. If these were her last moments, at least she could cling to that.

 

She wasn’t dying alone, and she wasn’t dying unseen.

 

For the first time, she felt a flicker of peace in the midst of her panic.

 

N leaned closer, moving with a kind of pained hesitation, until the space between them was reduced to just a few inches. Uzi could barely make out his expression anymore—her vision kept swimming—but his face was close enough for her to feel the faint heat radiating off him. The scent of metal and oil clung to the air between them, sharp and heavy. Even with that strange, wild tension in his gaze, something about his presence was still grounding. Just knowing he was there… it softened the edges of her fear, even if only slightly.

 

He leaned down until his mouth hovered by her ear, his breath brushing against her skin. When he spoke, his voice cracked beneath the weight of guilt. “I’m so sorry, Uzi… For all of this. For everything. I never wanted…” he trailed off, voice barely a whisper, as if he were afraid to speak too loud. “I promised you that you’re safe now. That I’ll fix things—I will, I will. But I just… can’t think of what else to do.” His words were uneven, thick with despair, as if he could barely bring himself to admit what he was doing and was about to do.

 

The apology barely settled in before his hand cupped her cheek again, his palm warm and a bit shaky. Then he leaned in, and Uzi felt the strange, unsettling sensation of his tongue dragging up the open gash across her cheek. Her entire body went rigid, a barely-there shiver running down her spine. The motion was painstakingly slow and measured—yet at the same time, she could tell he was being as gentle as he possibly could. But even so, it was unbearable. Instinctively, she wanted to squeeze her eyes shut, but she was so weak she could barely even manage that. That was not a good sign.

 

When she finally dared to glance at him, N had already pulled away. He swallowed hard, running his tongue across the corner of his mouth to clear away the oil. His expression was unreadable for a moment—eyes half-lidded, lost in something that looked like both craving and grief. Then, the sorrow surfaced again, prominent in every line of his face.

 

Uzi stared up at him, now barely able to breathe. Despite the fear curling in her gut, what struck her most wasn’t the pain—it was the look in his eyes. A look that said he wasn’t sure he could live with himself after this.

 

Without warning, N moved a shaky hand towards her face, his movements deliberate, and brushed her bangs up with tender care. The motion felt strangely out of place in all this chaos—so gentle against the ruin of what had just happened. Before she could even try to understand why, he pressed a soft, fleeting kiss to her forehead.

 

If this had been any other moment—any other day, any other setting—Uzi might’ve gone still from shock, and definitely would’ve flushed at the sudden affection. She would’ve turned away with her arms crossed, blushing, and made some sort of comment to him—calling him a dork or annoying, even though she secretly liked it, and wouldn’t have been upset if he did something else like that again.

 

But now, she couldn’t summon much of anything. The world around her felt too heavy, too blurred. Pain pulsed dully through her head and down her neck; every thought came slow, detached. All she could do was look up at him through heavy, lidded eyes, trying to make sense of what he was doing.

 

Then N’s hand moved again, settling with fragile care on the upper side of her head.  His touch was tentative, almost protective—but there was something else behind it too, something desperate. Uzi didn’t understand at first. Was he trying to comfort her, or was this another attempt to help somehow? Her thoughts tangled together, sluggish and incomplete.

 

When he spoke again, his voice cracked like glass. “Everything’s going to be okay,” he murmured—barely holding the words together, as though saying them aloud might somehow make them true.

 

Uzi wanted to respond—wanted to tell him it wasn’t his fault, or at least that she believed him—but she couldn’t find her voice. The ringing in her ears swallowed everything, even her own thoughts. The edges of her vision began to darken, spots appearing all over, the world closing in from all sides.

 

Uzi brain finally processed it—N’s hand wasn’t just resting on her head—it shifted with an intent she hadn’t caught initially. His fingers threaded gently but firmly into her tangled hair, guiding her head to the side with painstaking care. Every movement was careful, on purpose, as though he were handling glass that might shatter at the slightest wrong touch. The pressure of his palm increased just enough to steady her, anchoring her head while moved his other hand and rested it against her shoulder.

 

And then Uzi realized what he was doing. Why his breath was so close. Why his body had stilled into that tight coil of restraint. He wasn’t just holding her; he was positioning her, angling her head to expose her neck.

 

Even if she couldn’t see him, she could feel his presence there—his unsteady breaths fanning across the wounded side of her throat, the faint tremor of his fingers as they rooted tighter into her hair, but not enough to hurt. He was so close she could practically sense the battle behind his silence, the way his self-control frayed at the edges.

 

Her mind clung to the only explanation that gave her any hope—he was going to heal her. Like before, lick the wound, let his saliva work, and she’d come back from this. This was the last injury of hers he hadn’t covered, and the most important part to heal. After this, even if she passed out, she’d wake up whole. She tried to picture it: her cuts sealed, the pain dulled, her strength crawling back. But even as the thought surfaced, another—darker—truth pressed in at the corners.

 

This wasn’t the same as her arm or her cheek. This was her neck. Her oil was steadily pooling out faster than her systems could compensate. She still didn’t know exactly how much she’d lost, but she could feel it—life draining with every second, everything inside her moving slower, heavier, quieter.

 

A flicker of fear rippled through her, sharp and cold. What if it took too long to heal? What if it wasn’t enough? What if, even after all this, she simply… didn’t wake up?

 

But she didn’t say anything. She literally couldn’t. Her body felt like lead yet hollow, her thoughts like echoes. They was hovering somewhere between dread and resignation, clinging to the faintest thread of hope because that was all she had left.

 

This was it. The edges of Uzi’s vision dimmed until everything blurred into a murky haze, shapes losing definition, colors bleeding together. Her thoughts, once sharp and frantic, now drifted apart like scattered fragments in deep water, slipping through her grasp no matter how desperately she tried to hold them. It was like her mind itself was shutting down, piece by piece.

 

And in that fading space between consciousness and nothing, images flickered. Not clear, not whole—just flashes.

 

The outline of her room, the eye-straining light of monitors, the way shadows pooled on her walls when she stayed up too late. The countless hours she’d wasted hunched over, telling herself tomorrow would be different.

 

Tomorrow she’d be more than a failure.

 

Tomorrow she’d do something that mattered.

 

The good memories, the rare bright ones, struggled to rise. They came weaker, slower, muffled beneath the weight of regret. Maybe, even if she had genuinely been happy, it was still too new to her, to recent, for it too even matter, when she wasted so much time before.

 

Instead, what surged strongest were the feelings from her bad memories—the sharp taste of loneliness, the hollow ache of isolation, the endless self-loathing that had become second nature. Had she really wasted so much of her existence? Had she really been such a disappointment—to her father, to herself, to everyone? Either them leaving her or her leaving them before they could become close?

 

Her chest—if she could even feel it anymore—felt like it was caving in. She’d been trying to climb out of that pit for so long, to prove she wasn’t just some hopeless drone who would never amount to anything.

 

And for a brief time, she thought she’d made it. She’d met N. Fallen for him. He’d introduced her to his friends that were now hers. Emily, Rebecca, Darren. And even greater, she’d reconnected with Thad. Her past best friend, the one drone she was probably closest with, second to N. For the first time in years, within the past few months, she’d felt like she wasn’t completely alone. She’d finally had hope, a light that breached the darkness, that maybe her future like it wouldn’t be so bad after all. That every day was actually worth waking up so she could see the drones she cared about, who meant the most to her, who actually cared about her in return. 

 

Now, as her systems dimmed and the world slipped further away, she found herself wondering how they’d take it. How they’d react when she didn’t come back to the hotel. When they realized she wasn’t coming back ever again. The thought should’ve crushed her—but she didn’t even have the strength left to dwell on it. It floated up and then dissolved, like everything else.

 

She felt herself unraveling at the seams—fear, regret, grief, all blending together into a strange, quiet numbness.

 

Would anyone even remember her, other than her few select friends? The thought flickered weakly through Uzi’s fading mind, sharp and cold like a shard of glass. She pictured the world carrying on without her—the corridors at school, the empty chatter of classmates, faces she’d passed a hundred times but never really known. She’d been a ghost there already, hadn’t she? Hovering at the edges of conversations, slipping out of rooms before anyone could notice her. In the end, would they even recognize her name if it showed up in some half-hearted announcement? Or would it just be another headline they skimmed past, another drone they never really knew? The thought was like ice in her wires.

 

And then her father’s face came to her—a vague, dim picture of his tired eyes, the way his hands shook when he’d grieved for her mother. He couldn’t even fully focus on his door business for a weeks, and that said everything that his words did not. Would he grieve like that for her? Or would it be different—quieter, duller, more like relief?

 

That reflexive voice in her mind, the one that always bit at her self-worth, whispered that he’d probably be happy to be rid of her. One less burden. One less reminder of everything gone wrong.

 

But even as that ugly thought passed through her, she knew it wasn’t entirely true.

 

She’d seen the way he’d broken when her mother was gone. Seen how grief had hollowed him out from the inside, leaving him a shell of a man, even if he tried to cover it up with exaggerated enthusiasm. If she left him too, it wouldn’t be a clean wound. It would be jagged, the kind that never healed.

 

Her breaths came slower now, heavier, like her body was trying to shut itself down. Each inhale felt forced, shallow, as though she had to claw for it from somewhere deep. The simple act of breathing was no longer automatic; it was effort. And even that effort was rapidly slipping through her fingers.

 

This was it—her goodbye, the last flicker of consciousness in a life she’d barely begun to live. The cruel irony gnawed at her, even now. Just as things had begun to shift, just as she had started making her way out of the darkness she’d lived in for so long, the universe had found a way to snuff her out.

 

She felt small, bitter, and heartbreakingly tired.

 

All she wanted was to see N one more time.

 

Just once.

 

Summoning what little will she had left, she tried to turn her gaze toward him. It was almost impossible—her neck wouldn’t respond, her eyelids were leaden, and the black dots in her vision were slowly but surely blotting out everything, turning the world into a swirling, suffocating void. She could barely tell which direction he was in. But she wanted—needed—to see him, even if just as a blur.

 

And then she heard it. His voice. Close to her ear, soft and unsteady, like a broken prayer. Please… forgive me, Uzi…” The words weren’t just spoken—they cracked, like something inside him was splintering apart. There was a desperation to them, a plea that clawed at her even as her mind slipped further into the dark.

 

She didn’t have time to make sense of it. She realized too late that he wasn’t going to lick her neck, he wasn’t going to heal her. The warmth of his ragged breaths were still there, but beneath it came something else. The subtle drag of razor-sharp points grazing her skin, hovering over the jagged abrasion like a predator over prey.

 

And then, his teeth sank in. Deep. Far past the surface of her metal plating, biting down into her like a shock of white-hot lightning, deep down into the inner tissue of her throat.

 

The pain exploded through her like nothing she’d felt before. It wasn’t sharp so much as all-consuming, like her entire body was a single nerve ending being ripped apart.

 

Her breath caught—then vanished—and every muscle in her frame slackened at once. Her limbs went weightless, her core hollow, her vision eclipsed entirely by black.

 

She didn’t even have the strength to scream. The agony swallowed her, then dissolved into nothing as her senses flickered out like a dying signal.

 

And just like that, she slipped under, her consciousness ripped from her body before she could even comprehend what was happening.

Notes:

Sorry for posting late, hope it was worth the wait 🤧

Imagine if at the end of this chapter I js wrote “The End” and then never posted again. LMAO I’m js playing, I could never do that 😭🤚

Oh also yall, I have a confession… I lied. NOT ON PURPOSE THOUGH I SWEARRR- remember in the last end notes where I was like “Erm actually, after this arc the fic is gonna end 🤓☝️”

Well, I changed my mind 🫣

Tbh it wasn’t a pre planned thing at all. The reason I’m gonna continue it is cuz like, I was heavily debating if I wanted the chapter to end like this or not. I’m not going to directly say anything, but you can def assume what’s gonna happen to Uzi 😶‍🌫️

But yeah I wasn’t planning that like, at all. I was js gonna have her be healed and like “yay everything alright the story can progress like it was no big deal 😃👍” but I realized that *kinda* wouldn’t work

Like if wrote it, it would directly contradict the thing where wounds don’t heal like, immediately yk. Like when Uzi had been scratched by V super early in the fic, and N did well, yk 😭, it took an entire night for it to heal, but even then she still had a remaining scratch. Same with her hand a few chapters ago, and even if it was deep it was still relatively small compared to her wounds now. So if she literally lost wayyy over a pint of oil, I don’t think she’d even have a chance cuz only the surface of her wounds would heal.

I don’t think this is gonna pan out in the way u might think, though, cuz I don’t wanna make it predictable 🤭

Another thing, when I said I’m gonna continue it, what I’m gonna do is once I finish this arc I’m gonna make like, a sequel fic- if that makes sense.

The thing is, though, I think the chapter updates may not be on a schedule at that point, cuz I really wanna focus more on my other fics. Doesn’t mean I won’t update, and it’ll be wayyy more often that once a month or som, I’ll say that now.

And then also like, doing this makes it so I don’t have to rush the fic, cuz I was going to end it after this arc before I decided for the outcome of this chapter to happen. And a lot of things would be *super* unresolved, like why would J suddenly decide to stop trying to kill Uzi, specific things that’s gonna happen with Thad (interpret that however u want) will never have the chance to go anywhere or be resolved, there’d be no expansion on Uzi’s backstory, or pretty much any other character for that matter (we literally don’t know shit abt Thad 😭🤚 like Emily has more of a backstory than him 💔), all the mentions of Uzi’s mom would never be expanded on, Uzi wouldn’t have any more interactions with her dad, the list goes on

And creating a sequel fic also gives the chance for some really interesting developments/situations to happen, which I’ve thought abt a little bit. BUT I lowkey am gonna need help for ideas for specific things (will elaborate on what I mean later) so I’ll ask abt that at the very end of this fic

That’s all I have to say abt that. I have a few other, unrelated things to talk abt

So I was thinking abt it and like, Uzi *literally* had no friends or anything till a couple of months ago (obvi in the fic timeline) and when her life basically flashes before her eyes, she focuses on all the time she wasted being alone and beats herself up abt it 😣 poor girl, she deserves sm better :(

Off topic but not, but ik the drool thing might seem kinda random and gross, but I got the idea for that from the movie Sinners. Def one of my fav movies, and is absolutely amazing for something that came out this year cuz most movies suck now tbh 💔 (imo-)

If u don’t know anything abt it, it’s basically a vampire movie and like, the vampires follow the classic vampire rules (can’t go in a house unless they’re invited in, are pretty much a hive mind to an extent, weakness are wooden stakes and garlic, etc) but it’s also set in the 1930’s in rural Mississippi. All the characters are *super* well written and the whole concept of the setting is such a really interesting original idea/premise. 10/10 movie would recommend, and dare I say that it’s probs one of the best vampire movies out there. Oh yeah it’s also like, super graphic and gory so keep that in mind 😭

One last thing- To make yall feel better, look at this absolutely amazing MD fanart I found on Pinterest that I absolutely have to share. This is like the cutest thing ever and I love the art style sm 😖

https://pin.it/73EYYD5wK
https://pin.it/1DvRFS3MI
https://pin.it/6YtgRmsNV

Js paste it into ur browser or wtv-

Anyways, I get it’s for like, a human AU or wtv, but it’s SO CUTEEE also really reminds me of those 2000’s book covers

Had to share that with yall cuz like I literally don’t know anyone that’s a fan of MD 🥲💔

Okay I think that’s finally everything. Next chapter will be posted like, this Friday-Saturday

BYE