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“Fraser! C’mon already!”
“I’m sorry, Ray, but I’m afraid you just can’t rush these things.”
“Rush what? He’s sniffing a post.”
“It may appear that way to the untrained eye, but he is, in fact, keeping up to date with the news of the neighbourhood.”
“You mean he’s gossipping?”
“Diefenbaker does not gossip, Ray. He’s above that.”
“Sure he is, he’s a wolf.”
“Well, half wolf actually.”
“That’s not the point, Frase. The point is, we’re burning daylight here, and I do not want to be walking these streets in the dark, even with a Mountie and a gossiping half wolf and a gun. So make him move.”
“Ray, Ray, Ray. You know as well as I do that I can’t make him do anything. Besides, he’ll only be a moment.”
“Look, let’s just go without him. He’ll catch up.”
“That may well be true, but I really don’t see the rush. We’ll be there in plenty of time.”
“Not if we wait for Dief to finish reading his newspaper, we won’t.”
“You know, Ray, my father once disturbed a thief in the act of helping himself to the contents of an unoccupied cabin. The man got on his snowmobile and rode away at high speed, but my father, he walked half a mile back to his campsite, broke camp and tacked up the dogs before giving chase. Within twelve hours he had the thief in custody and was on his way back to the outpost.”
“That’s real nice, Frase. I’m happy for your Dad, but that has nothing to do with this situation. We have a deadline. What we don’t have is endless ice and snow. Plus, we only got one dog and right now, he’s the problem.”
“All I’m trying to say is…”
“I get it, Frase. I get what you’re trying to say. You think I don’t know what all your caribou stories mean? I do. You’re saying... be like the turtle.”
“The turtle, Ray?”
“Yeah, you know, the turtle. The one that was racing the rabbit.”
“Why would a turtle race a rabbit, Ray?”
“I don’t know. I don’t care. All I care about is, he won. He won because he KEPT MOVING. What he did not do is stop so his furry buddy could sniff pee on poles. That was the rabbit. The rabbit stopped and he lost the race because the turtle kept moving.”
“Ah, so you think we’re behaving like rabbits.”
“Maybe later, okay? Right now, I’m going back and I’m getting the car and we’re driving, because slow and steady might win the race, Fraser, but standing around waiting for Dief gets us exactly nowhere.”
“Just give him a minute, Ray; I’m sure he’s almost done. Look, he’s just beginning to circle the post. I’m sure he’ll add his scent in no time.”
“Fraser?”
“Yes, Ray?”
“Next time we just get Sandor to deliver the pizza like always. Okay?”
“Okay, Ray. Right you are.”