Chapter Text
Joe walks out of his dressing room, shades on and laying low. Hoping nobody notices him.
“You’re going to be good and help auntie Pri with Malti, right?” She hears Dani say nearby. He looks over and sees her and Alena standing with Priyanka and Malti. Alena is smiling wide, nodding at her mom.
“C’mon Malti, let’s go get some ice cream!” she says excitedly to the toddler in front of her.
“Cream!” Malti yells, running away from them.
“Oh, boy,” Priyanka laughs, running after the toddler, Alena right behind her. “We’ll be back soon!”
Joe smiles at his nieces, too distracted to notice Dani looking at him.
“Hey, what’s with the glasses?” She asks, walking over to him.
“Uh.. nothing,” Joe responds. “Just felt like wearing them.”
If this was a decade ago, she might’ve bought it. But being a mom of two has made Dani very good at knowing when she’s being lied to. And Joe knows that.
“Why? You’re inside?” She says, crossing her arms.
“Because I’m Joe,” he shrugs.
“And it’s not because you’re about to go out somewhere?” She smirks.
Fuck, he thinks. That would’ve been a better excuse. “I may go out, who knows.”
“Where’s Sophie?” She asks. Joe tries to hide the way his face changes when she mentions her name.
“I don’t know. I’m going to go look for her right now,”
Dani looks at him closely for a moment, analyzing him. He knows she can see right through him, but he really doesn’t want to talk about it. He stares back for a moment, hoping she’ll just laugh and not ask anymore questions. Making others laugh instead of talking about his problems is something Joe needs to work on, but not today.
Relief washes over him as he sees Dani give him a smile. He smiles back, nodding as he begins to walk away. Then all of a sudden Dani’s hand comes up to his face, and before he knows it his sunglasses are off his head and in Dani’s hands.
“Hey!” Joe exclaims.
“Oops!” She says, doing a double take when she notices Joes puffy eyes. “Wait…. Have you been crying?”
“No,” Joe shakes his head automatically.
“You have,” she looks closer. “Joe, what happened?”
“Nothing!” He tells her, accidentally letting out a sniffle. “I’m fine.”
“Sure you are,” she says, grabbing Joe’s arm and leading him back to his dressing room.
“Ok, talk. What happened?”
“It’s not important,” Joe starts to say.
“You have a show in a few hours and your eyes are red. What’s wrong.” Dani asks, standing her ground.
Joe sighs. Dani’s isn’t going to let this go. Even if she drops it now, Kevin will know about it in the next ten minutes, then Nick, then everyone else. Might as well spill the beans to her.
“Sophie….” Joe says, voice cracking. “She….. she…. Wants a divorce.”
Saying the words hits Joe hard, as realization strikes him. A divorce. He’s going to be divorced. His marriage failed. He failed.
“Oh, Joe,” Dani snaps him out of his thoughts, pulling him into a hug. “I’m sorry.”
He hugs back, trying to hold in his tears. “She… she said she fell out of love with me… that she couldn’t handle being apart for so long…. She... she found someone else.”
“What?!” Dani says, pulling back when she hears the last part. “She found someone else?”
“She met him on a night out with friends. Kissed him. Made out with him. She didn’t want to do anything else until she talked to me.” Joe says.
“That is not ok, Joe,” Dani says, shaking her head. “She just told you this tonight?”
Joe nods. “She heard my speech during hesitate last night and couldn’t wait any longer.”
“What a bitch,” Dani says, taking Joe by surprise.
“Dani!” Joe grins slightly. “Didn’t know you had it in you.”
“I do when someone hurts those I care about,” Dani tells him.
“To be fair to her though, I think I was too focused on other things for the past six months. We both were, but I definitely could’ve been a better husband,” Joe says, wiping leftover tears from his eyes.
“That’s no excuse to cheat, Joe,” Dani says. “You two are both grown adults who can communicate with each other. There was no reason for her to do it.”
“But-“ Joe starts to say, only to get interrupted.
“No buts. There is no good reason to cheat on anyone,”
Joe sighs, knowing he can’t fight with her. “Ok, there is no good reason to cheat. But I do wish I was there more.”
“Am I the only person you’ve told?” Dani asks.
“Yep,” Joe says. “I don’t know how I’ll tell everyone else.”
“Maybe start with Kevin and Nick, you guys have a show tonight and they can probably cover for you more if it’s needed,” Dani tells him.
“They’re the two who I’m least looking forward to telling, so no thank you,” Joe
says, going over to his couch and sitting down. He buries his face in his hands, rubbing at his tired eyes.
“Why?” Dani asks, walking over to sit next to him.
Joe looks up, furrowing his eyebrows. “Because I.. don’t want them to think I’m a failure.”
“What? A failure? Because someone cheated on you?” Dani looks at him bemusedly.
“I could’ve prevented it,” Joe says. “She only kissed him because I wasn’t filling her needs."
“And she could’ve talked to you about it,” Dani tells him.
“Maybe she did… and I just wasn’t listening,” Joe sighs. In hindsight, he knows Dani is right, but he can’t help but wonder what he could’ve done different.
“Theres always bumps and roadblocks in relationships, Joe. Kevin and I have had many. But neither of us have ever been unfaithful to each other. Never.” Dani says, sincerity in her eyes. “No matter what you did or didn’t listen to, you deserve better.”
“Well, not everyone can be you and Kevin,” Joe smirks. “But, you know what the worst part is?”
“Oh, there’s an even worse part to this?” Dani chuckles.
“I begged her to stay,” Joe says. “I begged to work things out. I even…. I….”
“You what?” Dani says, urging him to continue.
“I… I told her that if she stayed, I’d talk to the guys about cancelling and rescheduling tour dates so we could spend more time together,” Joe says, looking down at his hands. It wasn’t his proudest moment.
“Joe!” Dani says, mouth open in shock. “You said that?”
Joe nods, looking back at her. “And I have no idea what would happen if she agreed.”
“Thank god she didn’t, are you crazy?” Dani says.
“She said she’d never make me do that, that it would lead to resentment and more problems. And in that moment I didn’t care. I… I was ready to potentially ruin the band and… the relationship I had with my brothers…. For her.” Joe shakes his head.
“And if she did make you do that I’d be the first person to talk some sense into both of you,” Dani tells him.
“You think they’ll hate me for doing that?” Joe asks.
“Your brothers?” Dani says, sighing at the question. “No, probably not. They’ll probably understand in a way. But really, Joe, she does not deserve you.”
Joe nods, not wanting to fully agree.
Before either can talk, they hear Dani’s name being called from outside. It’s Kevin.
“Want me to get him?” Dani asks, getting up from the couch.
“Sure,” Joe sighs, wiping leftover tears from his face.
Dani gives him a smile and walks towards the hall. He hears her and Kevin talking outside his dressing room, then a few moments later she’s back, a confused looking Kevin behind her.
“Joe, what’s up?” Kevin asks, raising an eyebrow in concern when he sees his brother’s teary eyed expression.
“Uh……. Sophie…… she…. she left….” Joe starts.
“Oh? Wasn’t she supposed to stay for your birthday?” Kevin asks.
“Yeah… yeah...... she didn’t want to,” Joe says, hoping somehow Kevin will get the hint.
“She didn’t want to stay for your birthday?” Kevin says, walking closer.
“She left me, Kevin,” Joe blurts out. “She said she cheated on me, that she doesn’t love me anymore, and then just left.”
“W-what?” Kevin says, perplexed by what Joe said.
Joe’s voice cracks as he tries to talk again, tears threatening to spill out. He bows his head down and covers his face, hoping this is some nightmare he’ll soon wake up from.
"Joe?" He hears coming from his brother, but he doesn't look up. He can't. He then feels an arm around his shoulder, pulling him in for a comforting hug. It's Kevin, of course, bumping their heads together like he used to do when they were kids to comfort his brothers. It's reminiscent of a simpler time, when any hurt could be fixed with a bandage, a pack of ice, and ice cream. Now, he doesn't know if anything will ever fix the tear in his heart that Sophie just left.
"Joe, it's ok, you can let it out. I've got you, ok?" Kevin says softly.
Joe shakes his head. "This can't be happening." Tears start to spill out as he's too exhausted to hold them in any longer. He turns to bury his face in Kevin's shoulder, clinging to his brother as he quietly cries.
"I'm so sorry, Joe," Kevin says, after a minute or two of silence. Joe doesn't respond, he doesn't want to.
"She does not deserve you, Joe," he hears Dani say, as she sits down next to him too. "It's her loss."
Joe shakes his head again. "It's my loss. I.... I ruined everything."
"Hey, you did not ruin anything," Kevin reassures him.
"But I did," Joe says, sniffling back tears as he raises his head to look at his brother. "I wasn't there for her when she needed me the most. She... she needed someone... I can't really blame her."
"Most people in her position would communicate before cheating on their spouse," Dani tells him.
"Yeah, Joe, cheating is absolutely not something that shouldve been on her mind," Kevin says. "You don't just cheat on your spouse on accident or because you just felt like it."
"I abandoned her.. I should've... I should've asked for longer breaks.. for more time with family.." Joe starts saying.
"There was nothing you could do," Dani tells him. And she's right, Joe knows it.
"Have you told Nick yet?" Kevin asks.
"Nope," Joe shakes his head. "I wasn't exactly planning on telling anyone until Dani caught me with sunglasses in the hallway and started questioning me."
"I'm glad I did. Don't hide these things from us," Dani smirks, patting Joe on the back and standing back up. "I'm gonna go find Nick and bring him here."
"Wait," Joe stops her mid walk. "Before you do... I... I kinda wanna say something that I don't want Nick to know."
"What?" Kevin asks, raising an eyebrow.
"Oooh secrets," Dani says, turning back to them.
"I.... I might've said something really stupid to Sophie before she left," Joe starts.
"What'd you say?" Kevin asks.
"Don't hate me," Joe tells him.
Kevin's face grows more concerned by the second. "What did you say, Joe??"
"I... said I'd talk to you guys about postponing the tour if it meant she'd stay and we'd work things out," Joe lets out quickly, scared to look at his brother for a reaction.
"What?!" Kevin exclaims. "Joe!"
"Thankfully, she said no! That she could never ask me to and she wouldn't want me to do that anyways," Joe says, trying to put a positive spin on this.
"Joe, what if she said ok to it?" Kevin says, his tone a bit harsher than Joe expected it to be.
"I don't know! I mean, you've never had these thoughts?" Joe asks, trying not to be so defensive. "It just came out, I was desperate."
"No, hence why I had an existential crises when the band split up," Kevin tells him point blank. He sighs, silently looking at Joe for a moment. "But.... I guess.... I guess I get it."
"You do?" Joe asks.
"Yeah, I mean, who knows how I would've acted if I was you," Kevin shrugs.
"To be fair," Dani intervenes. "if he was thinking those thoughts I'd be the first to call him crazy. You're crazy too. They should rename you the crazy brothers!"
Kevin and Joe both smirk at that.
"That makes you a crazy brothers wife," Joe jokes.
Dani laughs along, patting Kevin on the back before starting walk away again. "I'll get Nick."
"I'm not telling Nick that last bit," Joe says as soon as Dani leaves.
"Uh, you have to," Kevin tells him.
"Do you want the band to breakup again?" Joe says.
"No, but you should be honest about it," Kevin says.
Joe shakes his head, not wanting to accept that this may just be his reality now
"I just......" Joe starts to say, contemplating what to say next. He's got a couple things on his mind. "I wish.. I wish I could be more like you..."
"What?" Kevin says, confused on the topic change. "Like me?"
Yeah," Joe nods, wiping a tear away from his eye. "I... I know we pick at you but.... you did it right the first time."
"Joe.. what are you talking about?" Kevin says.
"You were practically married before 21, you had kids, you... you had the perfect life from the start and......"
"Joe...." Kevin frowns, interrupting him. "Woah, wait... I.. I don't have the perfect life. I never did. You lived your 20s your own way, so did I, neither of us did the right or wrong thing..."
"I'm not finished," Joe says bluntly, looking over at Kevin. "I know I did things differently... but I thought when I finally get married and have kids I would be a pro. I would know exactly how to have the perfect family... I mean I had the best example right in front of me! and I.... I failed. I.. fucked it all up."
Kevin tries his hardest not to smile, appreciating the compliment. Did Joe really look up to him in that way? "You didn't fuck things up, she cheated on you. She's in the wrong, Joe,"
"But maybe I could've prevented it," Joe says.
"How?" Kevin asks.
"I don't know... you did it somehow," Joe says.
Kevin sighs, wrapping an arm around Joe's shoulder. He could start by saying that He didn't do anything. He just was lucky enough to find a girl as loyal as Dani.
"But you're forgetting one thing. I stopped paying attention to everything and everyone else in my life. That wasn't so great, was it?"
Joe is silent, not wanting to delve into that. It's not a touchy subject anymore, but still.
"I tried really really hard. It wasn't easy," Kevin talks again. "There were times where I thought she'd leave me. There were times where I thought I'd come home and all my stuff would be packed and she'd tell me she found someone else."
"Really?" Joe asks, looking at his brother.
"Yeah," Kevin nods. "I mean, she had so much going for her why would she date some guy in a band that isn't home for half the year. It made no sense..... and you want to know what else?"
"What?" Joe asks.
"When she was first pregnant with Alena, I was terrified that she'd want a divorce after the baby was born."
"Ok, now you're talking just to talk," Joe rolls his eyes. "You never told us any of this."
"Because I was scared you guys wouldn't understand," Kevin says.
Joe nods. "I understand now....."
"I know... you both do," Kevin gives him a smile.
"I just don't understand what I did wrong?" Joe says, trying not to tear up again. "I.. I mean she also has a job where she has to travel, it's not like she doesn't get how this kind of career works. Was I just not enough?"
"You are enough," Kevin tells him. "You and her just weren't made for each other like you thought you were. That's ok. It happens. And Joe, she cheated on you. If anyone is in the wrong it's her."
Joe sighs, burying his face in his hands as his eyes start watering again. He knows Kevin and Dani are right, but there's still a part of him that doesn't believe it. That thinks he could've done so much more, that he's a failure.
"Hey," Kevin says, an arm on Joe's shoulder. "You're not alone in this, ok?"
He nods, as Kevin pulls him in for another hug. Joe tries not to cry again, putting his head on his brother's shoulder. He wipes his eyes, as they sit waiting for Dani and Nick.
"Hey, Kev," Joe says, breaking the silence.
"Yeah?" Kevin says, quietly.
Joe pauses, trying to figure out how to word it without seeming too sentimental.
"I'm glad it was Nick that initiated the breakup... not you,"
Kevin smirks, and Joe knows he's rolling his eyes at that. "I guess I am too."