Chapter Text
“I just think it’s weird,” Charlie protests for about the millionth time.
He knows better than to think Elle is actually going to listen, of course. They both know that his ex-girlfriend trying to set him up on a blind date isn’t the weirdest thing about this scenario. It wasn’t really a typical breakup? Boy meets girl, boy and girl are best friends for all of grammar school, boy asks girl out the summer before he’s supposed to join her at uni, boy and girl date all summer, boy—admits to himself that he’s flaming gay and breaks up with girl right before he’s supposed to move into a flat with her. Instead, boy and girl try to be “friends” while boy, now living in student housing, drowns in guilt about breaking girl’s heart. Meanwhile, girl insists she’s moved on, then actually moves on—with one of boy and girl’s other best friends.
Yeah. That would be Tao, who’s been friends with Charlie for longer than even Elle has. But that’s a story for another moment.
Look, the point is, Charlie’s finally gotten back to normal, okay? Elle’s been dating Tao since November, Charlie’s been telling everyone he’s gay since he started school at Leeds, and the three of them and their final best friend, Isaac, have been managing to all get together for decidedly not-weird hangouts at least once a week for the last month or two. In Charlie’s opinion, considering they all live in the same city, it was even weirder when they weren’t doing that all last term, no matter what was going on in the weird love triangle that he’s trying to forget ever happened.
They don’t all go to the same uni, but they are all in the same city, since Tao is at Leeds Beckett University and Charlie, Elle, and Isaac all are at the University of Leeds. The three of them did try to convince Tao to apply with them, but he insisted on prioritizing schools with more niche, highly-ranked film programs. Tao shouted Charlie down many a time about how Leeds had exceptional literature and visual arts programs—some of the best in the country—so why should Tao have to compromise on a weaker degree program for film when Leeds Beckett was practically just down the road?
He was right, but Charlie still wishes Tao were at the same uni as him. Charlie gave up a long time ago on the idea of ever making any new friends, so can you blame him for wanting to hold onto the friends he’s got as tightly as he can?
It sucked a lot, not being able to hold onto them last term when everything was strange. It was bad enough that Charlie and Elle were in a breakup and that Tao felt some kind of weird guilt, like he was stealing Charlie’s true love away from him, even though Charlie never really loved Elle like that in the first place. All it did was add insult to the injury that the whole situation was messing with Charlie’s friendships, too.
But even Charlie has a threshold for how much weirdness he can tolerate for the sake of holding his friendships together. And apparently, what’s beyond his threshold is letting Elle find him a shiny new boyfriend to go with his shiny new sexual orientation.
“It’s not weird,” cajoles Elle. It’s lunchtime, but they’re not out to lunch, since Charlie is on a school meal plan and Elle, who has a flat with Isaac a few blocks away, isn’t. That’s weird, too, for the record. Isaac was supposed to be living in student housing like Charlie is, but since Charlie didn’t end up moving in with his then-girlfriend and she needed help paying the rent, he took Charlie’s place in Elle’s building, and Charlie took what was supposed to be Isaac’s room. Seriously, Charlie couldn’t visit Isaac in Isaac’s own flat for months, and even now, he gets a weird feeling when he goes there reminding him that this place was almost, in a parallel universe, his.
Point is, Charlie’s not paying to go out to eat when he’s already paying for free dining hall food, and Elle’s not shelling out for a dining hall guest pass when she can get meals that are significantly better (or cheaper) (or both) elsewhere. So Elle ate early, and Charlie’s eating late, and they’re spending the actual lunch hour sprawled out in the slightly dew-stained grass at Chancellor’s Court, walled in between towering brick buildings as Charlie attempts to defend his right to find his own boyfriend for himself without his ex-girlfriend’s help, thank you very much.
“Elle,” groans Charlie. “We’ve talked about this. It’s weird enough that we’re trying to be friends after we dated without—”
“Um, excuse me, you were the one who insisted we could be friends again someday once we worked through the breakup last term,” Elle points out, and she’s not wrong: Charlie did insist that. “And if we’re going to be friends again—real friends—best friends—then I have to be able to treat you like I would if we’d never dated—like I would have before we dated. And when I meet a cute, single bisexual boy who would be perfect for my gay best friend, then in any other situation, I would set them up.”
“Yeah, but this isn’t any other situation. We’re, like, barely friends again.”
“Which you wanted,” Elle notes again. “Is it really you that this is weird for? Or do you just not believe me when I say I’m really over it and ready to be friends and find you a boyfriend?”
There’s an aggressive note in her voice here only because Elle doesn’t really do defensive—never lets anybody else put her on the defense. It’s why she and Tao are such a good fit, really. Tao is the most defensive person Charlie knows, but Elle isn’t afraid to call him on his bullshit and doesn’t let his counterattacks get to her.
In any case, she’s probably right about this, too. Charlie was the one who wanted to rush through the breakup and get back to normal friendship; Elle was the one who wasn’t ready to do that, no matter how much she wished she were. If she’s saying she’s worked it out, doesn’t he owe it to her to trust her judgment on that? Isn’t this what he signed up for when he said they’d be friends for life as soon as she could be?
So Charlie rolls his eyes and groans. “Does it really have to be a blind date? Can’t you tell me anything about the guy?”
A smile snakes its way onto Elle’s face. “Nope.” She pops the “P” nice and loud when she says this. “His name is Nick, and that’s all you’re getting before you meet him.”
“But tons of people are named Nick. The ass in my dormitory who got drunk and pissed on my car at three in the morning last month is named Nick. That doesn’t exactly help me scope your Nick out ahead of time on Instagram to see if he’s at least my type.”
Elle rolls her eyes. “Because I don’t want you to stalk him on Instagram before the date. It’s a blind date. That’s all you need to know about him for now.”
“Okay, then can you at least tell me how you met this guy? He’s not just some rando you met at a club or something, is he?”
She shakes her head. “Nah. He models sometimes for my figure drawing class.”
It’s a good thing they aren’t having this conversation over lunch because Charlie would have choked on his drink for sure at this information. “Like, a nude model? The only thing you’re going to tell me about him is that he poses naked for strangers for—for—for fun?”
“Um, excuse you. It’s not for fun, for one thing: it’s for money. It’s a completely legitimate job to have. Figure drawing isn’t porn. I’ve learned a ton in that class thanks to models like him.”
“Elle, I don’t know about this. I don’t know if somebody who nude models for cash could possibly be a good fit for me. That’s not… who I am. It never will be.”
“Opposites attract,” shrugs Elle. “So can I tell him it’s happening? Are you free weekend after next?”
And Charlie is so, so tempted to say no… but then he forces him to really think about it. Elle’s not going to back down, is she? That’s just who Elle is: determined to a fault. And maybe she needs this, you know? Maybe it’ll help give her closure to know that she’s happy in her love life and Charlie’s happy in his, too. Maybe she needs him to do this so she can prove to herself that the mess that was their romantic relationship really is behind them.
“Okay. Fine,” he grunts, regretting every word of it. “Weekend after next. But I’m only agreeing to one date. If we don’t get on, there’s not going to be a second date.”
Elle beams. “You’ll get on. Trust me. All I have to do is get you in a room with him. Once you’ve met him, I won’t have to do anything to get you to want to keep seeing him, I promise.”
But Charlie’s not anywhere near as confident as Elle is in this. If anything, Charlie just wants to get this weird-ass date over with so that he can forget all about it and go back to being single and normal with his three platonic best friends.