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From the personal log of Ambassador Spock, Stardate 45232.9
The arrangement with Senator Pardek of Romulus has been finalized. Should all go according to plan, I will be present in the proper place within the month.
Starfleet, the Federation, and Vulcan will no doubt condemn my decision. The current detente between the Romulan Empire and the Federation has been delicate since the last war, maintained only through vast, mutually agreed distance. It is logical to be loath to test it. But that distance has failed in the past, and Pardek agrees that the current situation is only delaying the inevitable. The last encounter between Romulus and Starfleet nearly sparked another war. Diplomacy, however unofficial, must be considered.
I have considered it. I know the risks. I can accept these risks if it means finding our way to a more stable inter-planetary situation.
My communications with Pardek over the past decades have confirmed that there is an ever-growing movement within Romulan space that favors a more open relationship with the rest of the galaxy. What form that relationship will take... that is the primary reason I am choosing to leave the Federation and see to the diplomatic negotiations myself.
Some favor conquest. Others favor peace, open diplomatic acknowledgement, even trade. It will take a great degree of skilled diplomacy and logic to ensure that the latter group's philosophy wins out.
Six months ago, I had the honor of speaking at a good friend's funeral. Doctor Leonard McCoy will be remembered by many for his great achievements in the medical field. In his 144 years - a respectable lifespan for a Human, though too brief for a friend - he managed to both positively impact the health of over 200,000 individual patients and leave behind a wealth of medical research. The impact of the latter is unknowable even to a Vulcan, but it is an undeniable fact that there is not a single aspect of starship medical care, xenoneurology, and tricorder-based emergency medicine that he cannot be credited, in some way, with pioneering.
Many will be healed through his research, his intelligence, even his logic. If it can be called that. As for me, I prefer to remember his heart.
During my time both as a member of Starfleet and an ambassador between Terra and Vulcan, I have met a great many Humans. This large sample size means that I can say with a degree of certainty that Doctor McCoy was the most stubbornly, infuriatingly, determinedly moral Human I have ever encountered.
Some aspect of that morality was, no doubt, pure instinct. He certainly valued empathy, even emotionality, quite highly - a true "bleeding heart", to use a Human phrase. But a greater part was a reasoned philosophical standpoint derived from both his profession and the wide variety of situations he encountered during his lifetime. He would no doubt argue against that description, but it is true to my observations.
After all, I personally had the opportunity to observe how, in highly stressful, dangerous, and fraught situations, Doctor McCoy would consistently push past his first instincts in the interest of more effectively acting in the service of his profession. He would always argue against escalating aggressions, even when that might, to another, seem eminently warranted. He refused to destroy life, even to save his own - I can recall only one occasion where he fired a phaser that was not set to stun, and that was in the service of saving many lives not his own. When the situation allowed, he provided care even to the enemy. Not only was destroying life anathema to him, if he could preserve life with his skill he was determined to do so.
I could speak at length of the other aspects of his personal moral code, which was admirably well-reasoned and consistently put into practice, but those are the most pertinent points for the purposes of this log.
I told very few that I had managed to open a dialogue with Senator Pardek. This was in the interest of practicality, more than anything else - there was always a risk that the Federation or my own planet would have forbidden the conversations from continuing had it become known beyond a select few. Doctor McCoy was one of the few I told, and I found his observations illuminating.
Even my father, who had acted as ambassador for Vulcan for over a century before his retirement, could not fully understand what I sought to do. Doctor McCoy understood in an instant. He called it a foolish, dangerous idea, one that would no doubt blow up in my face sooner or later, but he also completely approved of the desired end result. A reasonable degree of caution combined with a steadfast moral sense - in short, his response was completely expected.
Since he carried my katra and risked his life and mind to complete the fal-tor-pan, I shared a bond with him deeper than even that of kal'i'farr. I carried that constant bond for 79.91 years. I knew Leonard McCoy for 99.1257 years from our first meeting on the Enterprise to when our bond fell silent.
The universe... it is all so quiet now.
When it is discovered that I have gone into Romulan space, this log will no doubt be seized and combed over for evidence of my duplicity. That is understandable. To those no doubt listening to this entry, I will leave you with a voicecom clip from the last time I spoke of my intentions regarding Romulus with Doctor McCoy. During our conversation, I asked him why he was able to approve of my decision despite his misgivings. I can think of no more accurate explanation and analysis of my intentions and actions.
Besides, Leonard always liked getting the last word.
"First, do no harm. That's all there is to it. I mean, self-defense is all well and good, but nobody will be saved when your finger's already on the trigger."
