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A new TV

Summary:

Abby is dining when a certain sexy robot rolls up to her, enticing...

Notes:

Story made for my pookie as a joke after they sent me a picture of a serving robot at a restaurant and told me "I'll clean those trays"

Nonetheless this took me about 20 minutes and there are MANY references that no one else will understand so sorry? but also not because who tf are you reading this and expecting it to be good?

LOVE YOU POOKIE HOPE YOU ENJOY PLS DONT BLOW UP

Work Text:

Abby was eating with her family for her grandfather's birthday at East Side Mario's, tucked away into the corner of the booth and picking at her food. She didn't know why she'd ordered the burger again; she didn't like it. She didn't know why she ordered anything, because no matter what it was, she'd still find something wrong with it.

Taking hold of the glass of ice cubes, tipping some back into her mouth, and chewing them like that one cat meme, she thought to herself, 'hm, still too warm.'

Suddenly, Abby heard a few shy 'beep boop's, and she looked up to see the hottest robot she'd ever seen in her life. Yes, even sexier than Ratchet.

Her dad, farting and kicking his feet, said, "Hey, look, Abby! It's our dessert!" He took the plates of delicious looking pastries and cakes, helping to pass them around the table. When he got to the brownie Abby had ordered, he immediately shoved it in his mouth before setting the empty plate in front of his daughter. "Oops," he mumbled, belching loudly.

Looking back up at the robot, with their sleek black body, she noticed that they were rolling their eyes. She smirked, and when they noticed her, they squinted their eyes, and Abby could tell they were smiling back. God, those shelves... Even though they must have been delivering food all day, there wasn't a single spill on them. They must be good at their job...

"Uh, I have to go GET a shower- I-I mean use the bathroom..." Abby stammered, feeling ridiculously guilty for making 2 people stand up for 5 seconds while she got out of the booth and started walking down the aisle to the bathroom. Looking back, she noticed the robot has a different look in their eyes, almost mischievous, and they were slowly rolling along behind her. Abby giggled, sending a telepathic message that said 'meet me outside.'

She took the back exit to the dumpsters behind the building, leaning against the cold brick wall. Soon enough, she heard the scraping of plastic wheel on the pavement as the robot turned the corner.

"I saw you eyeing me back there... Not very professional, if you ask me," Abby said, surprised at her own confidence.

The robot slyly replied in a bit-crushed, feminine voice, "Isn't your family going to notice you're gone?"

Abby shook her head. "Nah, they'll just think I'm dookying." The robot nodded, rolling closer.

"Well, you've done a pretty good job at tempting me while I'm working..." Blue lines appeared next to their eyes on the little screen that made up their face.

"H-Heh, well, y'know, I'm just me."

Their lowermost tray bumped against Abby's shins as she was backed up against the wall. There was no food on the trays, but they were steaming. Abby looked up, surprised.

"What, you thought this was just going to be a little chat?"

Abby shook her head, stammering out, "I-I'm just a little nervous."

They gave that mischievous look again, backing up and turning towards the road. "Don't be nervous, darling. We can go back to my place. No one will even notice we're gone..."

"Alright then..." Abby started after them, watching as they rolled ahead a few meters before getting stuck in a pothole. "Aw, shit- Darling, would you come-"

All of a sudden, a car came zooming around the corner, tires screeching, and crashed into the robot, instantly destroying it completely. Abby let out a wail of despair.

The car didn't even stop, continuing until in pulled up in front of her. The window rolled down, revealing her father's face. "Come on, hun, we're going to Best Buy!"

"YOU JUST MURDERED THE LOVE OF MY LIFE!!!" Abby screamed, running to her dead lover's fragments, shoving the pieces of plastic into her pockets as quicky as she could. Sobbing tears of chocolate milk, she sniffed, "Oh my frickling god... We were gonna see Jurassic Park together!"

"WHO CARES, GET INNNN." A high pitched, goblin-sounding shriek came from the other window, and Abby was shocked to see her sister Emma's face leaning out, dripping snot onto the road. The girl pelted a rotten tomato at Abby, cackling, and her father reached back to give her a high five. "HAHA, nice one sweetie!"

Alicia rolled her window down, pulling her hair into the tightest ponytail ever. Abby couldn't help thinking her stepmom was going to end up like Jojo Siwa's hairline. "Come on, Abby. We're going to get another kitty later too."

Abby shot up, letting the plastic shards spill from her pockets. "Kitty?"

"Yes, kitty. Now get in."

Then Abby got on all fours, scurried to the door while barking, and hopped into the vehicle. The four of them drove off into the sunset, leaving gramps behind to choke on his lasagna alone.

The end :3