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“Talk to your family a lot, Wonbin,” Shotaro had said at Haeundae.
So Wonbin wasn’t surprised when Shotaro had decided to retire early for bed, presumably to give him more privacy to talk to his family. Wonbin’s known him long enough, knows him well enough—the entire trip Shotaro’s tried to keep a respectful distance, too aware that he had suddenly barged into Wonbin’s childhood home without asking, too aware that he’s not a member of the family.
Stupid hyung.
He’s always been welcome, he’s practically family. Wonbin’s mom’s been asking him to visit for ages. Besides, if he was really worried about intruding, he should have worried about barging into Wonbin’s heart first.
In any case, Wonbin doesn’t see the point in staying up with his family any longer, since they video call almost every day anyway, so that’s why he’s cuddled up with his hyung in bed. Never mind the fact that they’re always together.
The guest room is empty. Wonbin’s family isn’t slow, he’s sure they knowthey’ve been rooming together this whole time even if he and Shotaro haven’t said anything. Shotaro had insisted on sleeping in separate rooms at first, told Wonbin that there’d be no funny business on this trip, but it’s precisely because he’s being so respectful and responsible that Wonbin wants to jump his bones even more. Wonbin’s surprised Shotaro hasn’t given in despite all the hungry looks he’s been giving him, but that’s fine. Sleeping together in Wonbin’s too-small childhood bed is an okay compromise. Wonbin can jump his bones the moment they get back to Seoul.
“How was the trip?” Shotaro asks, arms wrapped around Wonbin’s torso, as if they weren’t together the whole time, as if they hadn’t talked each other’s ears off the whole trip. Shotaro’s breath is warm against Wonbin’s nape, and Wonbin shudders a little from the sensation.
One thing Wonbin learned on this trip is that even the most mundane places and activities can seem fresh when you’re with someone you love, but like hell he’d say that.
“I just visited last February,” Wonbin replies, “S’fine. Nothing’s changed.”
Shotaro hums, clearly unsatisfied with his answer.
“Alright then, what was your favorite part of this trip?”
“You paying for lunch on the first day.”
“Not even the food?” Shotaro laughs, and Wonbin finds it difficult to keep his own smile down. Shotaro tickles his stomach, and Wonbin wiggles in his grip. “Me paying for you and your friends’ food was your favorite thing about this trip?”
“You paid for your own food too,” Wonbin corrects him, trying to pry his hands away from his sides. “Stop it, you said we weren’t doing anything!”
“I’m not doing anything!” Shotaro laughs harder, his fingers digging into Wonbin’s skin. “You’re just ticklish!”
Now if Wonbin really wanted him to stop, it’d be easy, he’s more than strong enough to overpower Shotaro. Instead he squirms in his grip, unable to hold in his own giggles, and he does his best to roll over so they’re face-to-face.
“My favorite part of the trip,” Shotaro starts, and Wonbin rolls his eyes because he didn’t ask, “Was getting to spend time with you and your family.”
“That was the whole trip, hyung.”
“I knooooow,” Shotaro sing-songs, “I know. But I love your family so much. They’re so sweet. I mean, I’ve known it for a long time now, but seeing all of this at your house, where you grew up… It’s no wonder you’re so easy to love, Bbina. You were raised with so much of it.”
Wonbin wonders if one day in the future Shotaro would be willing to melt down a piece of precious jewelry to forge something new with something precious of Wonbin’s, like how his parents had done with his necklace. Wonbin knows that if he asked that now, in this moment, it would be an easy yes from Shotaro. But what about tomorrow? The day after that?
Shotaro had said that it had been easy to make himself at home because Wonbin’s family had been so welcoming, but Wonbin knows it was easy simply because Shotaro is Shotaro. This whole time he’s been trying to think about it the other way around–if they go on a trip to Zama together, what would happen? Could he be as affectionate with Shotaro’s family and friends? His Japanese isn’t great yet, he can’t imagine holding conversations for very long… what does he mean by easy to love? As far as Wonbin’s concerned, among the rest of the RIIZE members, he might be the most difficult to deal with, the least affectionate, the least straightforward with his feelings–
“Wonbin,” Shotaro pinches his cheek, and Wonbin nearly jumps in surprise. “You’re making that face. Let me in on what you’re too in your head about.”
“I’m not too in my head about anything.”
“Is it because I said you were easy to love? It’s true.”
Shotaro’s never had any problem reading Wonbin, but tonight the latter wishes he wasn’t so good at it.
“It’s just,” Wonbin starts, because of course he can’t lie, can’t hide anything from the person he loves, “Hyung, will you think the same i-if, if we go to your hometown?”
Wonbin’s question doesn’t even sound complete and there’s absolutely zero context to it, but Shotaro seems to understand it anyway. “I’ll think the same when we head back to Seoul tomorrow, and I’ll think the same when we’re in Yokohama. I’ll think the same in Europe, in America. I’ll think the same anywhere, any time.” Shotaro presses their foreheads together. “It’s not hard to love you, Wonbin.”
The silence that envelopes them isn’t heavy nor unsettling. Wonbin knows Shotaro isn’t done talking.
“You know I’ve loved you since the beginning, right?”
Wonbin knows this too, but even now he thinks Shotaro doesn’t understand that Wonbin fell first, and fell harder. Wonbin can point out every detail of the moment they met and every single thing that had him head over heels at first sight, but for some reason, Shotaro thinks his affection is stronger than Wonbin’s own.
“It’s okay,” Shotaro reassures him, smoothing his hair with a soft smile. “You don’t need to say it for me to get it. Let’s just go to sleep.”
Wonbin also knows he’s too spoiled, so all he does is give Shotaro a kiss. Never mind whatever he’s worried about. Shotaro will wait for him, Shotaro will understand him, and one day Wonbin will get to tell him everything with the words he wants to say, no stuttering. Shotaro holds him tighter, and the mix of his perfume mixed with Wonbin’s household’s detergent makes Wonbin feel lightheaded. This is enough for now.