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What was even the point? Her team left her which made them all liars. Besides the wedding thing– well maybe that too– everything Pyx did was just her trying to get their attention. The first day she spent running around, doing errands for Finch with very little notice. The second day she couldn't quite remember, but they all left her. Then on the third day she was doing more to help out and she fell in the lava. No one was there when she woke up.
When she burned the Ark the first time, it was to try to make Finch and Spine proud, she already knew Pho didn't want her to. But Pyx couldn't even manage to kill Alphy, she needed to prove she was more than just a set of hands. When everyone was upset with her for it, she offered to leave . She did get it; what was the point of having someone who only aggravates people on your side? But they told her to stay , that they weren't going to let her leave.
Funny how that turned out, isn't it?
Pyx wondered, before she hit the ground, if it was worth hurting more people just to have new friends. She had half a mind to tell her new team that she can just help them out without actually being part of their team. In every life, she's her team’s regret. She saw them.
In Revived Life, she watched Cami and Spwashy share glances while whispering to Milo about Pyx’s replacement. Scott had been asleep but she never heard from any of them again before she found herself shackled to them without any way to be heard. Replace her with her murder, how funny.
In Loop Life, she got Generic killed with her shenanigans. Not once but twice. Pyx should've known Will was going to betray them, all the signs were there. A silent red name on a bridge behind two yellows. It was obvious. Even outside of inadvertently causing all of Generic’s deaths, she also saw the way her own soulmate looked at her. Like they wished they could have anyone else. Guess that's what she got for letting her child die over and over and over.
Then it happened again. She didn't understand what was wrong with the wedding stunt, she needed to prove Alphy wasn't better than her and she got the bonus of protecting Katherine. Granted, it sucked that she didn't win that fight with Generic but Pyx knew she was no good at close combat fighting. She just didn't get it.
Granted, the selfish thing made sense. If she hadn't been selfish would she even matter to them? Outside of just being a kid that did all the base chores? If that was where any of them were going to end up she knew they'd do the same. So why was it a big deal? Why did they want to kick her out ? They stopped her from leaving before and this seemed so much tamer than all the shit she did to the Ark. The Lesbians weren't even threatening– like– at all.
Point being: she clearly wasn't fit for a team.
She was so, so grateful for everyone who was nice enough to agree to be her ally, but she felt like she didn't deserve it.
Then she woke up at spawn, tears in her eyes as she muttered to god that she was gonna head out. She had one friend since the beginning, and he was off doing useful stuff and Pyx couldn't interrupt.
Even if everyone, absolutely everyone , hated her with all their heart, she knew who she was gonna try to help get to the end.
Maybe Spoon was onto something about Pyx becoming a ghost…