Chapter Text
Sasha settles near the porthole to look at the city under the night sky. It is a pretty view, but Liberio looks also terrifyingly big and developed. How are they supposed to win against the Marleyans? What is there to win anymore? Freedom? Peace? Aren't they the ones taking it away by engaging in this war? Is there any other choice for them than to fight back?
Sasha longly sighs as she sets her temple against the thick glass of the porthole. She keeps her eyes on Liberio, exploring the land through the lights showing the lasting agitation of the citizens. She doesn't know much about them, and it scares a part of her.
It is beyond Sasha's understanding what is really going on and what they have to do. At this point, she maybe prefers to simply obey Hange's and Levi's orders, and try her best to keep her friends alive. Of course, she wants to do what is right, but she trusts her leaders on that, and more importantly, she cares about the squad too much to walk away. It is the main reason Sasha is staying among the Survey Corps. Still, it cannot stop her from wondering what she would do if she wasn't involved in this war.
"Sasha," Jean offers her a drink.
She slowly straights up and smiles at him, accepting the beer. Watching her friend going back to the crowd, she decides to stand up and join the celebration as well.
Today's mission was a success. Her friends are safe. It's all that matters.
While Sasha sips on her bitter beer, enjoying the sweet aftertaste, she watches her fellow soldiers enjoying the night with songs and laughters. Among them, a pretty short woman, with curly red hair and freckles, gives her a warm grin as their eyes meet. Sasha mirrors her.
"Sasha! Since when are you into girls?" Connie asks, joining Sasha's side. "If you had told me I would have set you up with a new buddy I just met. She's so strange, you're gonna love her!"
His attitude is so carefree and joyful that Sasha has no doubt he had more than a beer already.
"I'm not into girls, Connie," Sasha replies. "I wasn't flirting. I was being polite and friendly."
Connie sighs, slightly rolling his eyes in disappointment. Before taking a new sip of his drink, he mutters:
"Maybe you weren't flirting, but Maria definitely was."
Sasha looks back at the red-haired woman, apparently named Maria. Her round face and thick lips make her face cute like a little mouse.
"Not my type," Sasha declares.
"What's your type, then?" Connie asks. "I always tell you whenever I find someone attractive but you're still being too shy to share it with me!"
"Sasha too shy to share something with you?" Jean picks up on their conversation, putting a friendly arm around Connie. "What on Earth could that be?! You guys would inform each other on the size of the poo you make!"
Sasha shows her amused exasperation by briefly shaking her head.
"Sasha is too prude to tell anyone about the men she fancies," Connie explains to Jean, in a haughty tone.
Jean's jaw drops, faking a severe offense. Sasha just rolls her eyes.
"I don't tell you because there is nothing to tell," she declares.
The men voice a jumble of doubting sentences, which ends up standing out, when the chanting and laughter quickly dwindle. This change of atmosphere gets Sasha's attention. She assumes Captain Levi has entered. He has always had that intimidating effect on people.
Sasha puts down the beer away from her, and tells her two joyous friends to stand still. They are technically allowed to drink, as they have reached the legal age, but she wouldn't risk a lecture from her Captain. He has never been soft on her. One could even say that Captain Levi is less enthusiast to interact with her than with anyone else of the squad. She tried getting closer to him for a while, but quickly gave up as it only resulted in him avoiding her. She still doesn't know the reason behind this cold treatment.
"Eren is here!" Connie exclaims, standing straight enough to see above the crowd.
As he takes her hand to go together meet their old friend, Sasha wonders about why is Eren returning to them now, of all days.
Getting close enough, she first notices Eren's hair, which has significantly grown. He also let a few inches of beard grow and wears casual, almost sloppy clothes.
Already there, Jean amicably grabs Eren's shoulder:
"What happened to you, Jaeger? You look like shit."
"I'm still far from falling to your level, Jean," Eren retorts, in what could have been very amusing, if his tone and expression weren't so cold.
Still, by pride, Jean feigns a short laugh and welcomes Connie's intervention:
"Hey, long time no see, bud!" he enthusiatically greet Eren while initiating their personal high five.
Sasha spots a thin ray of healing smoke evaporating from the titan shifter's cheekbone. Her instinct tell her he got on someone's nerves and they snapped at him.
When Eren suddenly meets eyes with Sasha, she notices how his gaze has changed into something so dull and tired, that it is strange of him. Why is he looking down and annoyed, when he is the one who walked away from them without a goodbye?
"I need to talk to you, Sasha," Eren announces. "Let's talk in private."
Sasha blinks in confusion as he quietly gestures her to follow him outside of the hall. It takes her a few seconds to process and follow him outside the crowded room.
It has been almost two years since Sasha has last seen Eren. What on Earth could he have to tell her? There used to be a lot she wanted to tell him: Why did he left? Will he come back? What is he doing alone inside Marleyan territory? Will he be safe? Doesn't he worry about them? Not even about Mikasa?
In the end, none of those questions have ever been voiced.
Seeing him today, almost feels unreal. And observing how different he looks, naturally makes Sasha worried the friend she used to know hasn't come back. She has been considering him a friend. Is it still reciprocated? Even before he left, Eren's behavior has been solitary and cold. She tried to cheer him up several times, but after getting impolitely pushed away again and again, she simply stopped trying and gave him the space he asked for.
As they exit the room, the noise of chattering fading, Sasha is thinking about what to say. A figure against the wall distracts her from pondering. It is Captain Levi.
As he stands straight on his feet, Eren tells him:
"You don't need to come with us, Levi."
Sasha's eyes widens at the way too familiar manner of calling their legendary Captain. She would never dare.
"I'm still tagging along," Levi replies.
He joins them walking through the corridors. His cold eyes glance at Sasha, who immediately tense. He usually doesn't look at her, except for scolding or checking her condition after a tough battle. Sasha is almost certain that Captain Levi has always been avoiding her by disgust. He likes things to be neat and tidy, and Sasha has bad manners, gets clumsy, and sometimes can be just a little bit childish.
Still, right now, Captain Levi is observing her from the corner of his eyes. It is not a reprimanding or judging gaze, so Sasha struggles in interpreting it.
"Where are we going?" Sasha asks Eren, trying to distract her own mind.
But Eren ignores her.
"He hasn't told you anything yet, hasn't he?" Levi asks.
Sasha glances between the two men. Captain Levi seems to be in the known of whatever is going on.
"There's no time for any chit-chat," Eren intervenes, not even looking behind. "I'll explain it all to you when we'll get there, Sasha."
"When you'll get there, it will be too late for her to say goodbye to her friends," Levi hisses.
"She won't be gone for long."
"To us, not to her!" the Captain starts snarling. "You can't just isolate her for years without a warning!"
Eren stops in his track and stares at Levi. He doesn't seem pissed, but curious. His stare is silently scanning Levi.
"Are you in need of kicking me again?" Eren asks.
"Don't tempt me," Levi retorts.
Sasha is quietly watching them, having no idea what's happening. They seem to be arguing about deporting her for several years. Probably for a mission. If that's so, she would indeed appreciate saying bye to the squad first, but with this tension, she doesn't even dare to say anything.
"We don't have the time for this," Eren finally speaks, resuming his course.
Captain Levi makes a low groan, before following him again.
They quickly arrive at a small wooden door which Sasha believes to be a closet, but when she enters she discovers it is a small room. It is completely empty except for an old and high wardrobe. Eren shuts the door close behind them.
The place smells like dust, and the flooring whines under their feet.
"What is going on?" Sasha finally allows herself to ask. "Have I done something wrong?"
Her mind brings back the fresh memory of stealing alcohol in Commander Hange's closet.
"No, you did nothing wrong," the Captaian assures her.
His tone is now much softer, just like that time he soothed her before suddenly applying coarse salt on her wound. So naturally, it doesn't make Sasha feel more at ease a single bit.
They both watch Eren as he opens the used wardrobe to check inside. He makes a pause, checking its content, and then shuts it back. Turning back to them, he tells the Captain:
"You must have waited for this for a long time, Levi."
"Quite the opposite, actually," he refutes.
Sasha glances between the two of them, begging for a piece of information.
"Can someone tell me what are we doing here?" she asks, a hand discreetly reaching for her rifle, ready to be used towards any threat.
She cannot help but wonder if they are going to kill her. She trusts them, but not enough to let herself die without knowing why. Not only that, but she must not hesitate if she has to, because there's an Ackerman against her, and his sacred blood won't give her the time to make up her mind.
"I'm not about to kill you, Sasha," Eren assures her. "On the contrary, I'm here to keep you alive."